A sötét hang

Tegnap megint éjjel mentem haza. Nem valami jóféle buliból, a munkahelyemen próbáltam arra kényszeríteni magam, hogy dolgozzam, de nem ment. Próbáltam, próbáltam, de nem ment. Éjfél után adtam fel. És a villamoson leüvöltöttem egy pasas fejét. Van nekem ez a félelmetes hangom. Ritkán jön elő és valahogy nekem is ijesztő. Félelem nélküli, elszánt és brutális. A pasas amúgy tapogatni kezdett a mögöttem levő ülésről előrenyúlva. Először azt hittem a zsebembe nyúlkál, szóltam neki, hogy fejezze be. Aztán megint éreztem, hogy tapogat. Felálltam és kieresztettem a hangom. A pasas amúgy nem volt százas vagy be volt tépve. Átültem másik ülésre. Éjjel mindig a vezetőhöz közeli ülésre ülök, de amíg nem veri rá az ember az ablakot, a vezető is leszarja mi töerténik a háta mögött. Ettől a csávótól nem féltem, kis nyomorult volt. A félelmetesek a suhancok, összeverődve, bepiálva vagy beállva meg a részeg férfiak, azok ütnek és késelnek. Hát ja, nem kéne éjjel járnom haza, bár nappal se jobb szerintem. De nem is ezt akartam, hanem a hangokat, hogy én sem tudom mikor mi jön majd elő, mintha más más személyiségem lenne, többnyire valami gyerekes cukiskodó hangom van, nem is nagyon szeretem, olyan komolytalanná tesz és ha megijedek elakad, elcsuklik a hangom vagy amikor izgulok, és jajj persze ha valaki olyan van ott, aki tetszik, olyan jó lenne olyankor az a másik, a hűvös, okos hangom, ami olyankor jön elő, amikor nem érdekel, hogy amit mondok elfogadják-e, ezen a hangon beszélek az MLM ügynökökkel és ezen mondom el a megoldásokat amikor már minden összegabalyodott, a hang amin sínre teszem a világot. Van még a hisztihangom, amikor beszélni se tudok, a hangom magas és a szavak összekeverednek bennem, és csak ismétlődnek a mondatok, és egyre kétségbeesettebb vagyok amiért nem tudom kifejezni magam lehet, hogy e helyett inkább csak sírok. Mind közül persze ezt szeretem legkevésbé, bár a sötét hangom megijeszt, mert tudom, hogy gátlástalanná válnék, ha meg kellene védenem magam. A francba, tényleg be kell dobnom a táskámba a paprikasprayt. Gondolkodom, hogy a fejemben melyik hangon megy a narráció, de azt hiszem, ez egy másik, mintha egy hangoskonyvet olvasna valaki, szépen beszél, sosem dühöng és csak néha jajveszékel, hogy nem bírja odabent. Nehéz dolog kommunikációs stílust váltani, ha valami beidegzdött és azért ennyi idős korra be is csontosodott már, mert először mindenkinek stratégiailag jónak tűnik, aztán a visszajelzések alakítják a személyiségünket. Ha valaki mindig cinkus megjegyzéseket tesz, akkor azok maradnak mellette, akik érzelmileg megközelíthetetlenek és a cinikus megjegyzéseken jól szórakoznak. És akkor ő lesz a vicces-cinikus, amivel azonosulni fog és közben a lelke mélyén nem érti, hogy miért nem alakulnak ki mély kapcsolatai, és még cinikusabb lesz, hogy az értetlenségét elhazudja. A kedves kislány kap megértést és segítséget, az emberek visszamosolyognak, de sosem veszik komolyan, hiszen csak egy gyerek. Okos vagy nagyon, monja a főnököm, csak olyan szeleburdi. Nyilván ő sem tudja összerakni, hogy hogy van ez, hogy látom amiket mások nem, aztán a komoly dolgokat meg elhülyéskedem, és csodálkozom, hogy csak a bolondok vesznek komolyan.

Ugh, frustrating result in the game tonight (or last night by the time the queue posts this).

I visited my folks for a bit on my way to the rink, and with my dad talking wound up being a bit later than I prefer, but not too bad. That didn't matter because we started out dominating the game pretty well and I had plenty of time to get settled before I had to face any shots. Unfortunately, not long after they started getting some shots they scored on a rebound with a guy not covered in front of me.

Then they scored again a bit later on another play where I made some stops and then lost sight of the puck and they got to it and got a shot I saw late and got my glove to but not enough to stop.

Then not much later they scored again on a breakaway, one on none. I really felt I should have done better stopping that one but also had no help on the play.

We managed to get one goal back late in the first period at least, after having more chances for the first while and being about even overall play for most of the period with not much to show for it.

I personally felt I did better in the second period, which was scoreless until late. They'd had a bit of a breakaway which our guy stopped but got called while doing it to give them a powerplay.

During the powerplay for some reason I do not understand at all our two worst defenders (who are a good deal worse than the two best ones) were both on the ice together to kill the penalty. I frustratingly missed covering the puck after making a couple pretty good saves and they failed to clear it and got caught out of position so it was three on one down low. I stopped a couple shots before they managed to score.

So going into the third it was 1-4. But the last period started out well and I made some good saves and we started converting on our chances better. We actually were able to score three straight goals to tie the game at 4. But then, with about 5 minutes left there was a two on zero breakaway where their guy had plenty of time to pick his spot and set up his shot and put it in a very awkward spot right over my shoulder and caught the top of the net to score and take the lead again.

As time got to a couple minutes left we took a time out and planned for me to go to the bench when we got the puck with the faceoff in our defensive zone. But we lost the faceoff and then they were moving it around and it went behind the net from my left. I went to the right and saw two of our guys look like they ran into each other, which was why I figured they didn't get the puck. But there was actually one of thier guys behind the net who had stopped it and passed it back in front to my left. I figured out the puck wasn't behind me on my right just in time to see them shoot it but not have enough time to do anything about it and they scored the final goal of the game to finish off a 4-6 loss for us.

It was a frustrating game and I really felt like I screwed up and should have played better and cost us the game, but when I think through the goals there was pretty bad defensive mistakes on each and every one of them so maybe I'm being a little hard on myself. Still, I would really like to have done better and felt if I had we had a strong chance of getting a win.

Oh well, will just try to be better next week.

I really, really enjoyed going to the university today, even just for one class - it felt so organized and peaceful and like… clear and focused on one purpose. Like ok this here is a place for learning and not much else. Wonderful clarity compared to the usual at my home. But I get home, and do my online class stuff, and then it’s evening and time for dinner, and what gets to me are these syllabuses saying “expect to do 6 hours of work outside of class per week.” So like 5 classes, 3 hours of class each plus these six hours… that’s 45 hours of schoolwork a week?!?! More than a full time job!?!? Like no way; I do not have that kind of time.

Totally freaked me out.

And like, 25 years ago, I took six classes per semester, so 54 hours a week back then? No way; I taught myself to play bass and we used to watch tv late and sleep in when we could and I wrote poems and made art and played with my cat and generally had a good time. But nobody was saying I’d be spending 9 hours per class every week, either. I just showed up and did the work without being terrified first.

Just seems like a weird and fretful thing to pile on the students on the first day.

well.

fuck.

Anyone else find it hilarious that the best villlan in the show is also the weakest

compiled pony doodle digitalizations of the last coupla weeks

It’s christmas and i needed to get something out

So here’s the forger family, in all their slightly disastrous holiday spirit.

i can’t stop editing rainbow dash into dirty rooms

feel free to spread these and disease the general public if you wish (but credit me please) !

Legacy

Leon's model through the years:

Well our playoffs did not start out very well personally. I think some stuff that happened prior to leaving for the game got in my head more than I realized but I feel that deserves its own post.

Both teams had some subs who normally play in the slightly higher league. Ours was for our best defenseman while theirs was on offensive. That gave them a considerable advantage I think, which did not combine well with my horrible start and we were down by three about halfway through the first period. I felt overall the play had been back and forth and I was able to make one decent save late in the period at least but was still upset at myself.

In the second I played better but there were still more goals, though not entirely my fault this time. Their offensive skilled sub skated through four guys on our team before beating my crappy angles. Later we coughed the puck up low to a pretty skilled shooter who also took advantage of my bad angles. We at least got one from our sub during a powerplay and I did make some good saves on breakaways when we were trying to push to score.

The third period was my best of the night personally, as well as for the team. We were still giving up some chances because we were playing aggressively to try to score goals so I had to make some more saves but managed to do so and didn't let anything in for the period. We finally got our offense going some too, even though it was late. We were pushing to get one more to have at least just a one goal difference when it was 5-3 late. I went to the bench for an extra attacker and we created a few good chances before giving up the puck and giving them a few chances on the empty net. The first stop was good but our player wasn't able to make the second.

After that it was pretty much decided even though we did end up scoring another one right as time ran out for a 4-6 final score. Our upper level sub had one goal, I think theirs had 2 or 3 and was involved in two other scoring plays.

It was good at least that we got better through the game I felt but it was certainly upsetting how badly I played to start and felt losing this one was pretty majorly my fault.

Oh well.

The pic is the other ice sheet at the arena, they have it closed down all week for some sort of maintenance.

you should 110% make p*rn master lists for scream!!!

𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐌𝐄𝐍 𝐏*𝐑𝐍 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ੈ✩‧₊˚

➸ 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: charlie walker x fem reader, billy loomis x fem reader, stu macher x fem reader, ethan landry x fem reader, chad meeks-martin x fem reader

➸ 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: twitter p*rn links, oral (f/m receiving), p in v, unprotected p in v, switch! reader, mutual masturbation, fingering, breeding.

➸ 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒: these are videos that remind me of my favourite scream men, i’ll be updating this every so often! the links only work if you’re logged in on twitter!

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐋𝐊𝐄𝐑 ♡

charlie fingers you while you watch a movie

charlie praising you during fluffy morning sex

mutual masturbation with charlie

teasing charlie with your cunt

riding charlie in a skirt

riding charlie part two

playing with charlie’s cock

soft dom charlie worshiping you while he breeds you

𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐒 ♡

dom billy fucking you from behind

billy fucking you while your parents aren’t home

billy eating you out

billy with breeding kink

billy sucking on your tits

letting dom billy use you

needy sub billy eating you out

ruining sub billy’s orgasm

𝐒𝐓𝐔 𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑 ♡

stu slapping your pussy

stu teasing your clit with his tip

bouncing on stu’s cock

bouncing on stu’s cock part two

stu overstimulating you

stu fingering your wet pussy

making sub stu cum in his boxers from dry humping

sub stu sucking your tits

squirting on sub stu’s face

𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐑𝐘 ♡

over stimulating sub ethan

ethan eating you out

ethan fingering you while you kiss his neck

ethan fucking you from behind

ethan fucking you from the back part two - this one looks exactly like him it’s insane

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐌𝐄𝐄𝐊𝐒-𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐈𝐍 ♡

making out with chad in his dorm

chad with a breeding kink

giving bf! chad head after a party

chad fingering you and playing with your tits

idk this is just very chad to me

dab and evan through the years (2017 -> 2023)

I am trying to decide what I want to draw today so I think I'm gonna make the Mane 6 in the sims and see where it goes from there

Ah yes, the TmagP avatars:

guy who got peer pressured into eye removal by a building (i assume)

Incredibly talented artist… what will they do? Hurt people probably

Killed his wife, now he’s the garden

Violin player (evil)

73 million needles in a trench coat/worlds worst acupuncturist

in the tags, post where you’re from and list the first animal that comes to your head for each of these:

1. animal associated with sleep

2. animal associated with singing

3. animal associated with jumping/bouncing/hopping

4. an animal that is cowardly

5. a wise animal

6. a cunning/sneaky animal

see my tags for examples of what i mean. i want to see what other people connote animals with.