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pandorcas-endgame · 1 month
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I am aromantic. I am asexual.
I wish I felt Pride in that. I can't. Not yet, at least.
It's not because there's something wrong with lacking these forms of attraction. There is not. I absolutely love and envy those that have been able to overcome their internalized bigotry towards this. I do.
It's just that me realizing this about myself is pretty recent. And I'm mourning.
Yeah. I'm mourning aspects of life that I'm never going to experience and that I never wanted in the first place. And I'm crying over it almost every day.
Again, it's not because there's something wrong with this. Aromantic and asexual people are not broken.
I've never been in a relationship, romantic or sexual. I never wanted to, not really. But it's fucking hard to have people every day saying things like "that's a sad way to live" or "you're missing out".
I'm not mourning my lack of romantic and sexual attraction to anyone because it's something that I ever inherently missed. I'm mourning it because this fucking society has drilled into my mind that I'm broken and incomplete without romance and sex. And that's fucked up.
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pandorcas-endgame · 1 year
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"Fuck you my child is fine!"
Ma'am your child uses fiction as an escape mechanism and would rather be fighting a bunch of demons and permanently being at the risk of dying any moment than live in real life.
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pandorcas-endgame · 1 year
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May we all find our fiction worthy found family
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pandorcas-endgame · 1 year
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hoarding books and not reading them is a disease i suffer from
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pandorcas-endgame · 1 year
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I love the possessive Regulus narrative
Regulus whispering mine mine mine as he kisses James
Regulus tracing his name on James' body
Regulus writing his initials on whatevet part of James is close enough.
Its not unusual to find James potters hands inked with the letters R.A.B
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pandorcas-endgame · 1 year
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Sirius giving Remus chocolate
Remus: Merlin, I love you
Sirius: Thank you. Wait, are you talking to me or the chocolate?
Remus: Do you want me to lie to you?
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pandorcas-endgame · 1 year
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Regulus: We should become unhinged and go on a murder spree. We deserve it tbh.
Barty: Can we start with my dad?
Evan: We're already unhinged, we're just missing the murder part.
Pandora: I can finally put my poison knowledge to the test.
Evan: And how much do you know about poisons?
Pandora: Remember that time Mulciber was in the infirmary for three weeks with an unknown illness after he tried to hex Dorcas?
Dorcas: I kind of want to kiss you right now.
James, who just wanted a normal afternoon with his boyfriend: Are you guys okay?
The Others: Not at all
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pandorcas-endgame · 1 year
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pandorcas-endgame · 2 years
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Well Anti-Hero has taken over my entire brain (as well as the rest of the album but that song in particular) and I cannot stop listening to it. Gonna have a breakdown over this song soon 😭 It's so good but omg I relate wayyyy too heavily. Regulus kinnie screaming out lmao
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pandorcas-endgame · 2 years
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Stay Down (June 5, 2018 demo) - ​boygenius // Sunshine of Your Love - Cream // The Kiss - Gustav Klimt // No Plan - Hozier // Woman Sitting by the Window - Tivadar Kosztka Csontvary // How we met: “It’s like waking up to sunlight every day. I yearned for a soulmate – and I’ve found her” - Lizzie Cernik, The Guardian // The Sun Never Says - Hafez // Sunset in Corsica - Henri Matisse
Inspired by a post by @llovelymoonn
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pandorcas-endgame · 2 years
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a self-portrait in letters, anne sexton / "ugly, bitter, and true;" suzanne rivecca / untitled 2013, klara kristalova / "savoureux," hannibal / untitled 3008, yuanyuan yang / "erosion," jamie oliveira / "earth my likeness," walt whitman
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pandorcas-endgame · 2 years
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sometimes to get better we have to get angry
kara walker, "untitled," 2016, ink on paper / anger I’m good at / David Shrigley / regarding the röttgen pietà, elle emerson / David Shrigley, untitled, 2000 / paramore - interlude: i’m not angry anymore
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pandorcas-endgame · 2 years
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love is violence
sylvie baumgartel song of songs \ fatima aamer bilal (@fatimaamerbilal) even flesh eaters don’t want me \ hélène cixous stigmata: “love of the wolf” \ federico garcía lorca blood wedding \ @avainblue​ \ @glasswaters​ \ venetta octavia i set it in stone \ saeed jones how we fight for our lives \ yves olade bloodsport: “when rome falls” \ sue zhao 
kofi
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pandorcas-endgame · 2 years
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I need to write but my brains in too much of a perfectionist mode to even start writing which is just 😑. Does everybody get this? Where you have an idea and you're really excited to write it but as soon as you sit down to write it your brain goes this must start perfectly or it'll all be a huge failure? Or am I just a mess? I really want to write this but I also really want it to be written well and my brains telling me everything I come up with is bad which is not at all helpful.
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pandorcas-endgame · 2 years
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Void cat but space, with moon for eyes~
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pandorcas-endgame · 2 years
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Dorcas: What did you do?
Regulus, who just walked in: Why do you think we did anything?
Barty, behind him: Dorcas, I am offended by this accusation.
Dorcas: Because you have that glint in your eye and Barty's poker face is worse than your coffee addiction. And mine. Together.
Barty: Hey! I have a great poker face!
Evan: Why do you think we always ask you to play poker? You're horrible at it.
Regulus: And competitive so we get a lot of money out of it. Oh, and I just paid a little visit to my elder brother. Wanted to try out a new spell I've been working on that'll automatically change every red item he wears green with a few alterations so that he can't hange it back and every time he tries another item of clothing will turn green. Just in time for Quidditch too.
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pandorcas-endgame · 2 years
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I'm bored so here's my random views on the slytherin skittles coffee habbits.
Regulus would be addicted to black coffee. Like enough that even Marlene lives on coffee McKinnon is concerned for his health. (Marlene is not a morning person but also loves Quidditch so her being addicted to coffee makes so much sense to me)
Pandora is no longer allowed to drink coffee ever since the caffiene induced potions incident of 1975. No, I will not explain.
Dorcas is also a caffeine addict but cannot understand how anybody drinks coffee without milk.
Evan only drinks tea except for exam period when he drinks more than even Regulus.
Barty somehow drinks the most normal amount of coffee (note that the bar is extremely low).
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