Catching delicate sunbeams of our intimate forever, within the beautiful heavens of your angelic eyes and turning the divine light, into tender kisses of breathless eternity
Lazy day update… suns still out but thankfully I've got some of my decking in the shade so after an afternoon of binge-playing Fallout 4 (I'm addicted), I've come out for some fresh air! Chair in the shade Pip chilling on the table with my iPad and Deftones on the airpods! Chilled Saturday indeed, all I'm missing is some BBQ food but having one with family tomorrow so something to look forward to 🍔🌭😍🤤
(PS… have some pics… shock I know two selfies in one day, its a long time since I've liked selfies of myself enough to post them😅🙈)
Hygiene - Had a shower, brushed my teeth twice today and moisturised my face today.
Physical activity - Went and watched my son play rugby so I walked around the field a bit.
Eating - Nothing yet, I have a donut from last nights dinner with Fiend and his partner so I might try eat that later.
Sleep - Not much, 4 or 5 hours. Just about fell asleep a couple times today but couldn’t sleep for more than 5min.
Selfcare - Nothing really.
Academic growth - Nothing today.
Overall mood - I don’t know? I’m inconsolably sad but I don’t feel it properly? I don’t know, lack of sleep, eating and drinking has made my mind slow and I feel really unwell.
I was sad and in my head today, trying to formulate ways to make things right or even better. And I don’t know how to not think about it.
I was vomiting and struggling to remain conscious yet unable to sleep.
Regardless of both of these things I still got out and watched Nuggs rugby game for an hour. He did well, ending up getting five tries! While I was there I saw my dad and Nuggs mum and half siblings so it was cool to have some more human interaction other than Fiend, and his partner.
Fiend came over and watched some anime with me before he picked up his girlfriend and headed out of town.
I spent the rest of the night trying to relax and watch anime but my mind couldn’t stop and I couldn’t stop feeling sick.
… I know it’s only been a couple days yet but I don’t know how to be okay. I miss shnooks… It’s weird, quiet and sad without her around… Half of me is gone…
UPDATE: I ended up falling asleep and about half an hour to an hour later I got woken up from Shnooks calling me. She ended up going out with her favourite girl, watched a concert, had a bit of acid and then got some maccas. She’s called me every time she’s gotten home from town for years, and I always love those talks. She told me her fries were cold though so I jumped in the car, grabbed her some more then headed over and hung out with her for about an hour or so. It was good to just hang out and see her, talk and laugh about nothing.
•{"Saçlarım beyazlıyor artık, her şeyi uzun uzun anlatamam, sesi, gürültüyü, insanları, kafam almıyor artık..."}
Şimdi, ciğerlerimden külleri solumuş gibi, boğulmuş gibiyim, kağıt öbeklerinin ortasında; bulanık, gri! Yamalı ceketim benden daha iyi durumda, hiç yoktan giyilebilir, hiç yoktan ruhumdan, talan edilmiş kalbimden daha değerli, daha ağır, hiç yoktan hâlâ sevilebilir! Peki ya masadaki bardaklar? Işıldayan çatal kaşık? Gözlerimden daha parlaklar, çamur rengi kiremitlerden, tükürülmüş kaldırım taşlarından daha berbat, yüzümden düşen parçalar...
My love for you is like a river that flows deep and wide.
A love that never wanes, a love that never subsides.
Like a rose in bloom, our love will flourish and grow.
With each passing day, our love will only bloom more.