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#))my thoughts are haunted by these two even in my sleep
daltheznadofart · 8 months
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"I'm with you through everything." [Astarion x Teresta, my drow pc]
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ofheroesandcrooks · 1 year
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pyrriax · 1 year
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what if i just waited to post stuff until i've got my current three Ideas written
just post em all back to back and then sleep for a week
[ !! venting in the tags !! ]
#haunted ecosystem#haunt's feeling: a lil burnt out! been writing a bunch for literally going on four months stragiht#i mean the state of the world is NOT helping with this fact. plus also uuuuuuh trauma anniversary kicking me in the nuts rn#normally i dont mention that shit but it is def hitting me hard. we stay silly tho i'm just mega tired rn#might just designate myself a two week break again and relax a lil. i've been on a like. kinda drawing kick? i hate drawing though#i really wanna just watch another pov of outsiders and just think abt silly aus. i love coming up with stuff for wtds but ALSO i just. wa.#lotta thoughts. words just arent quite working!#we're approaching the final stretch and so much of this is so specific in my head that i don't wanna mess it up#also like this one stupid comment that wasn't even mean is just eat at me and i wish it wasn't lol#usually the comments are just funny but like. idk. it was a neutral/negative thing and was the first response i heard abt that chapter#which sucks! i love chapter 20! it was half the fucking reason i wanted to write wtds!#i wanted to share what lead up to that :( i wanted to share the story and the everything and just. ugh.#that stupid comment had me rethinking posting it. which. sucks.#rsd hits like bricks when you aren't mentally prepared for negative feedback#uuuuuuuuh#sorry i just. needed to say it#sorry for venting in tags </3#ok yeah my words are just giving up on me im gonna just close my laptop and go do. something#maybe just watch some streams and remake my bed.#that reminds me i really should stop sleeping on the floor. that's more mental energy than i have rn though so.#i guess i'll change the sheets and see how i feel. not being on the floor would probably be a good idea#ok im just gonna#added a warning in the post lol#normally i try and keep my blog light hearted!! i want to keep my blog light hearted but. sometimes its just how it is#i might end up scrapping some of the work i did because i accidentally projected some shit onto pandora that. doesnt fit ig?#it was an accident but it happened anyway#love the lines. not sure they work.#i should finish that one fic that's been rotting in my drafts. c!emduo is something i haven't written in literally a year#project on a character i CAN project on.#anyways i'm gonna post this and just. close tumblr. im tired
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peachesofteal · 4 months
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Simple Math / Part Six
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Ghost/Soap/female reader 4k words - AO3 Warnings - tags: 18+ MDNI. No smut but this fic contains mature themes. Nurse reader, hospital setting, medical inaccuracies. Reference to past domestic violence. Angst. Alcohol. Crying, anxiety, panic. Johnny in distress. Johnny is still a menace. Soft dads. POV switches. Note: Safe sleep for infants always. I do not endorse sleeping with your baby in your bed. This is a fic not real life. Simon does some digging.
“Shhh now, ye’re alright.”
Johnny coos, Penny cradled up to his chest. He’s not wearing a shirt, eyes still half sealed shut with sleep, and she squalls in his arms, screaming as loud as her little lungs will allow. “What is it, mah wee lamb? Are ye hungry? Do ye need a change?” He checks her nappy, efficiently looking for a mess or something to clean up and is nearly disappointed when he finds her still dry. If it’s not her nappy, then maybe her stomach? Could she be hungry again? He thumbs through the notes on his phone to find Simon’s last entry: 23:20 – 50 ML. 
That was only an hour ago. 
He frowns, walking in a circle, bouncing her gently, trying to settle her back to sleep. She’s so tiny, and still has grown so much in just the short time since they brought her home. It amazes him. It terrifies him. 
“What is it, sweet bairn? What’s got ye all upset?” He touches his lips to softest skin he’s ever felt, his thumb trying to swipe away the tracks of tears on her cheeks. “Please dinnae cry. I-“ 
“You okay?” Simon clears his throat behind him, and Johnny tenses. 
“We’re fine. Ye’re supposed to be sleepin’.” 
“Heard the two of you in here fussing. Thought I could help.” Simon’s trying to be supportive, trying to be a good partner, Johnny knows, but all he can feel is irritation, a defensive reaction making his hackles rise. 
It’s not fair. He’s so good at it. He’s a natural. And Johnny… Johnny feels like he’s failing his own kid, when she’s not even a month old yet. 
“I dinnae need-“ 
“Hey.” Simon touches his elbow, and then his chin, tilting his face upwards. “I know you don’t, love. You’re doing a great job. It’s not your fault she’s having a rough go.” He soothes him, fingers kneading into the top of his spine, squeezing the nape of his neck and pulling him into his arms. Penny is still crying, but softer now, a low-pitched tone of misery that makes his heart ache, and he feels so overwhelmed, so helpless, staring down at her as she tries desperately to tell him what's wrong, the only way she knows how. He rests his cheek against Simon’s chest, melting into his hold, letting him wrap his arms all way around his waist. 
“She hates me.” Johnny grumbles, and Simon presses his mouth to Johnny’s temple in short, succinct kisses. 
“She doesn’t. She’s brand new. She can’t hate anything, yet, and certainly not her Da.” He strokes her cheek. “Let’s bring her to bed, see if we can get her down and then one of us can put her back in the crib, alright?” Johnny sighs. 
“Alright.” 
“What’re you doing after this?”
“Going to bed?” What else would you be doing?
“I’m thinking about going to Jackie’s for a drink… wanna come?” Nia untucks her scrubs, pulling the top up over her head.
“Jackie’s, huh?” You chew on your lip. You shouldn’t. You really, really shouldn’t. But… Jackie’s is a dive. It’s dark, and dingy, with black walls, black floors, no window in sight. And... it’s a hospital haunt. 
“It’s my birthday.” She whispers, casting a glance around the rest of the room. “I’m not… it’s not a thing, I just want to go, have a few to celebrate.” You take a deep breath. “Please?” She tacks on at the end, and your shoulders dip down in defeat.
“Okay. One. And then I gotta go.”
“Yes!” She cheers, excitement smashing her palms together.
Nothing like a seven am beer. 
Jackie’s is a distinct place. It’s one of the only twenty-four-hour liquor licenses left in the city, or so you’ve been told, and has been frequented by hospital staff for decades. It’s dart boards and dark wood floors, cheap beer and rail vodka, a worn to hell pool table, and an old, disabled juke box that someone broke intentionally, years ago. It’s an institution, and reminds you of some old places you used to frequent, when you weren’t… who you are now. Years ago, before, you used to love a good dive bar. Didn’t mind the way the floor stuck to your feet, and you considered yourself nearly tactical at darts. It was a source of pride, the accuracy, the rate at which you could make a bullseye, even when you were a few sheets to the wind.
“Coulda been a surgeon.” You’d tease, a smirk growing across your boyfriend’s face.
“If you were a surgeon, sugar, who’d be at home waitin’ for me after work?” He’d push back, coating the warning in an adoration, giving whoever was undoubtedly watching a slick smile before snaking an arm around your waist and tugging you close. “You don’t need to be surgeon. You don’t even need to work. You have me.” 
You thought you knew, then. Knew how to handle it, how to navigate the ever-present, ever-growing threat… but you were wrong.
You were so, so wrong.
“So, heard there’s a spot opening up on days.” Nia chucks her purse at the bar top, climbing onto the stool next to you. “You’ve got the seniority… you givin’ it any thought?” The bartender walks by with a hello, and you nod at him.
“Old Speck please. And no, I like nights.” She raises an eyebrow.
“Didn’t know Americans liked Old Speck.”
“We have it in the states. I didn’t live under a rock.” You quip, and she laughs before ordering her own poison, a choice that makes your own eyebrows shoot up in question. “Vodka on the rocks?”
“I’m a straight to the point kind of girl.” She explains. “So, no days?”
“No days. You?”
“I might. Night shift is kicking my ass.” She complains. “Don’t even know what day it is half the time. My rhythm is off.”
“You need like, at least six months to fully adjust.” You put a note down in exchange for your beer, and then the bartender scuttles away, distracted by some insistent woman at the other end of the bar.
“Six months?!” You’re about to launch into your spiel about how it’s not that bad when your phone vibrates in your pocket.
>Make it home from work alright? 
>It’s Johnny, by the way :) 
The two texts are the start of a new group chat with your number, Johnny’s number and the number you put in your contacts just yesterday… Simon’s. Your head jerks back on instinct, confused.
“You okay?” Nia asks, and you nod.
“Yeah, fine just…uh-“ She peeks over your arm, and giggles.
“Is that your patient? Two sixty-eight?”
“What?”
“Your patient. The military hottie. The one that’s always lookin’ at your bum.” Your face burns, and she tsks. “Ah, don’t be embarrassed. He’s smokin’. Wish he looked at me the way he looks at you.” You’re surprised at the flare of irritation that starts up in your stomach at her, a hot streak of jealously simmering there, burning away indignantly. “Aren’t they… I mean… isn’t the scary mask guy his partner?” He’s not scary, you scowl inwardly. He’s just… protective. The butterflies in your stomach startle, and you drift back to last night, in the stairwell, in the car.
“You’re doing great, sweetheart.” 
“If you ever need anything, Johnny and I… we’re here.” 
Nia says your name, dragging you back to earth, and you shrug. “Yes… they… they’re together. It’s just been hard on them, so I think there’s a bit of an attachment growing there. You know, it’s not unusual.” She bites her lip, mouth pushing up into a smile.
“They’re quite fit. Wouldn’t mind if they formed an attachment to me.” She pauses, delicately sucking her gasoline on ice up through a straw. “Gonna text him back?”
“Nia.” You hiss, and she barks out a laugh.
“Oh, come on, just a bit of fun. I don’t mean anything by it.”
“It’s not appropriate.” You remind her, and she rolls her eyes.
“You’re such a stick in the mud sometimes. Remember when Marshall was fucking his brain cancer girl? Now that, was not appropriate.” You do remember- Marshall’s sudden absence, the whispering, the HR investigation that spanned weeks, interviews with everyone on the floor.
Your beer goes sour in your stomach.
“I gotta get home.” You wrap an arm around her shoulder with a squeeze and a whisper. “Happy Birthday.” You feel bad for abandoning her, and maybe in another life you might even consider her a friend, but you’re already too exposed here as it is, and staying any longer would be too indulgent- not to mention, incredibly stupid.
You pass another nurse on the way out and him know that Nia’s at the bar, alleviating your guilt just a tad before you hike up your hood and make a beeline for the train.
By the time you get back to your hotel room, get showered, and collapse on top of the far too big bed, it’s nearly been an hour. You plug your phone in, unlocking the screen to flick on do not disturb, and realize the group message is still open, cursor blinking, waiting for your response.
It’s fine. You can tell you got home okay, that’s not crossing any lines. 
>Yeah, just got settled for bed. See you later!
A text from Simon chimes back within a minute, and you squint at it, one eye open.
>Get some rest.  
The floor is dead silent at the beginning of your shift.
Nothing beeps or whines or cries, no noise echoes around the corner to where you’re scrolling through Johnny’s chart, getting caught up on his day, triple checking that his levels and vitals are all within normal range. He passed his follow up for the liver procedure with flying colors, and the relief you feel is not unexpected, the weight of worry lifting free from your shoulders without another thought.
He’s fine, he’s better than fine, he’s… too healthy for the ICU.
Reality hits you like a truck, and you stop short, sneakers squeaking along the floor.
He won’t be your patient anymore. 
He won’t… be your patient anymore. 
The thought twists you into a mess of complicated emotions. A snarled, tangled viper's nest of unknowns, uncertainties, things you're desperately trying to tuck back behind your heart, hide them away so no one, not even yourself, can see them.
This is a good thing. This is what you want. Stable patients, on their way to recovery. 
So, you’ll miss them, that’s okay. There’s a little bit attachment, that’s alright. 
This is the best case scenario. You’re making a mess of things. You’re getting too involved with your patient and his family. You let Simon drive you home, for fucks sake. 
They’re getting confused, because you’re the caretaker. It happens all the time. As soon as Johnny steps down, they’ll forget all about you. 
You’re risking too much. You’re risking their safety, their child’s safety, your own. 
It’s for the best. 
You put your best work smile on when you approach his room, pulling as much air into your lungs as you can manage.
Focus on your job. Your patient. You’re a professional. 
Johnny is alone. No Simon, no visitors, nobody keeping him company. It’s a strange sight, and he looks almost uncomfortable, creased brow lowered down over his eyes. That’s… odd. Worse, there’s a heaviness in his gaze, sadness pulling his mouth downwards, usual playful demeanor nowhere in sight. Even sad, he’s a marvel, and every day, he gets stronger, he gets healthier, he gets closer to leaving this room, amazing you with his tenacity, his will. 
“Hey, you on your own tonight?” You casually knock on the door frame, and then pull it shut behind you, cocking your head.
“Aye.” He’s sullen, his despair tugging you closer to the bed, an urge to try to comfort him too strong to deny. 
“How are you feeling?” You try the subtle question, hoping he'll be forthcoming, and you keep yourself composed as you wait for his answer. 
“’m alright.” You tab through his chart, glancing it over once more, if only to assuage your own anxieties, and then tap into his vitals. Everything looks good, last labs look great… so what’s going on? 
“Just alright?” His fingers flex in the blanket, tanned skin against white linen, picking at fibers and threads, unable to hold himself still. He looks like he’s going to burst open at the seams, explode inside this room, a ticking time bomb, just waiting for the end of the countdown.
A tear tracks down his cheek. “Johnny?” You step closer, close enough so your fingers graze his, trying to delicately let him know, you’re here. “Hey, hey. It’s okay. What’s going on?” The monitor beeps steadily in the silence, his chest depresses with a gust of air.
“It’s… it’s nothin’ bun. I’m jus’… I’m havin’ a bad day.”
“Want to talk about it? I hear I’m a pretty good listener.” You encourage, and his face twists.
“No, I- Ach. Aye, alright.” He shifts in the bed, and you hover in case he needs help, but he waves you away. “It’s… bein’ in here. I want to be wi’ my family. Penny turned one, before I left for this assignment. Was only supposed to be two weeks tops, but then it turned into a month, then two. And now, I’m home… but ’m not really home, and I-“ His voice cracks, raw thread of agonized emotion separating his words, and he swallows it, forcing it back. “I’m blown to bits and cannae even see my own daughter. I’m missin’ out on everything.” Oh, Johnny. Your heart is heavy, and it hurts for him, bleeds as he wipes his face. 
“You’re not blown to bits, just a little banged up.” You give him a soft smile, and when he shakes his head, your fingers find his on instinct. You don’t even stop to second guess yourself, fully sinking into the contact with a gentle squeeze. “Hey, look at me.” His lashes are wet, sticky with tears, and he sniffles. “You’re making great progress, Johnny, going to be out of here in no time. You won’t even be in the ICU much longer, and then once you’re downstairs, Penny will be able to come visit all the time. After that, it won’t be too much longer until you’re back home with them.” He nods, and you stroke your thumb across his knuckles.
“Ye think so?”
“You’re the toughest patient I’ve ever had, and I’ve had a fair amount, you know. Traumatic injury recovery takes time, it takes patience, but you’re doing a great job of it so far. You just have to take it one day at a time. Before you know it, you’ll be at home on your own couch, bossin’ Simon around all day instead of me.” He laughs at that, a throaty chuckle capable of spreading heady warmth through your veins, and then gives you one of those stupidly stunning smiles.
“Shouldnae be cryin’ in front of ye.”
“You can cry in front of me any time you want. That’s what I’m here for. Besides, it’s not the first time.” You tease and he rolls his eyes.
“Doesnae count. I was high.”
“Uh huh. Sure.” The untouched dinner tray on his side table catches your eye, and chilling worry reappears in the back of your mind. “You didn’t eat?”
“Didnae have an appetite until ye showed up, pretty girl.” Okay. You can remedy this easily, if he's interested in eating. Lack of appetite is alarming, but if you can get him to eat now... 
“You hungry? I haven’t eaten yet. Want me to grab you something?” He brightens, indulging in a spectacular smile, and you take it as a yes with a small laugh. “Alright. Let me run down to the café, yeah?”
“What’s that saying, about how I hate to see ye go, but love to watch ye leav-“
“Okay!” you practically shout, cutting him off, fire racing across your skin, and he snickers, palm pressing against his heart like he’s wounded. “I’ll be right back.” You give him a serious look, and and he rubs his palm through his hair, mirth sparkling in his eyes. Holy hell. How is he so attractive? And how is it still so blinding, every time?  
You get two of the only option left this late in the evening, chicken soup and some sourdough, balancing the bowls carefully on their trays until you’re placing them down in the room, swinging the little table over Johnny’s lap and settling in beside him, perched on Simon’s recliner. The soup is warm, spiced with herbs and thick with noodles, and you're pleased that it's better than you were expecting, happy that Johnny seems to like it as well. 
"Wanted to take ye out properly for our first date, but this will have ta’ do. Simon’s gon’ be so bloody jealous.” He masterfully hums between your bites, and your eyes go wide, trying and failing to swallow your soup instead of choking on it.
“Johnny, we… this… I- this isn’t a date!” you squeak.
“Why not?” He asks, inflection innocent, and your brain rattles around inside your skull, splitting down the middle, falling apart in bewilderment. Why not? What does he mean?
“You… you have a partner. Simon? You know, your family that we were literally just talking about?” He doesn’t say anything, just stares at you with this look on his face, one you can’t interpret. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
“What did Simon tell ye, the other night. When he took ye home?”
“What? He… I don’t remember.” Does he know that Simon gave you his phone number? 
Of course, he knows, he started that group text. 
Does Simon know what Johnny said, about you coming into their lives? About-
“Didnae he tell ye, we’re here for ye?”
“Y-yeah.”
“We, bunny? We.”
“I don’t… I don’t understand.” He sighs. What is he trying to say? What is going on?
“We like ye. Like I said, we think ye’re really special. Simon, and I. Together, bun.”
“Wh-what?” Puzzle pieces snap together and then break apart, like a landscape jigsaw that you spent days completing once before it was promptly ruined. Does he... does he mean... Oh. Oh no. Oh no no no. You have to squash this. Now. Just explain it, he’ll get it. He’s smart. “No… no, Johnny it’s just… it’s this thing, that happens. Patients get attached to their nurses or doctors sometimes, it’s normal. You d-don’t like me, I promise. There’s nothing even to like.” He blinks, jaw grinding under stubble. If Simon’s stare feels like he’s reading your mind, then Johnny’s is like being pinned down in one place, unable to move. You’re paralyzed, and powerless, lost in the icy blue sea of his eyes, drowning with a hand sticking out above the crest of the surf, reaching for him.
“Why would ye say that? That there’s nothin’ about ye to like? Nothin’ could be farther from the truth.”
“I don’t… there’s not. It’s… I’m your nurse, Johnny. That’s all.” Sweat glosses the small of your back, slicking upwards to cover your spine, and your heart hammers, it beats, beats, beats- so loudly you’re sure the pulse point in your wrist is visible. “Johnny.” His name shakes from your lips, and he relaxes, gentle concern replacing the relentless intensity in his gaze.
“Shhh, hey. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I didnae mean to upset ye.” You're still frozen, a statue, and he reaches for you, trying to grab onto your hand. The heat of his skin breaks you from the spell, and you force a robotic, bedside smile onto your face, scooping up your half empty bowl.
"It's okay." You need to get out of this room. Now. The walls feel too close, Johnny feels too close, everything is compounding on top of you, threatening to derail your entire life, ruin your plan. They cannot like you. They cannot care about you. They cannot show interest in you. You can’t let this happen. “I’ve gotta check on some other patients, okay? I’ll swing back your way in a bit.” You promise him, guilt eating you alive about running away, and when he gives you a sad smile, you almost lose your resolve.
“Alright, pretty girl. I’ll see ye later, then.” He murmurs, and you try not to trip over feet during your hasty exit.
Fuck. You’re so fucked. 
Simon and Johnny’s house is finally silent.  
Penny is down, safely tucked into dream world, her grainy grey-scale image flickering on the video monitor at Simon as he pours two fingers worth of bourbon into a glass.
Poor baby girl. His stomach twists. She put up such a fight tonight, hollering at the top of her lungs, standing up in her crib, working herself into an absolute state. He hates leaving her alone to cry, and on nights like this one, the only way she’ll close her eyes is if she’s being held, snuggled in Johnny's arms, or against Simon's chest. 
He’s a sucker, he knows. Doomed from the day she was born, but he can’t help it. Neither of them can. She’s their baby.
So, he doesn’t blame her for being so out of sorts. She always sleeps better when her Da is home. They both do.
His phone vibrates with a text, a short message from Johnny, and he scrolls through it, settling on the couch with his laptop, unopened email from Laswell blinking impatiently.
>She’s jumpy. Tired. Looks like she hasn’t gotten any sleep. Simon frowns.
> She manage to find a pair of panties for work today?
>Unfortunately. He can practically see the pout on Johnny’s lips, can hear the way he probably huffed and puffed when you first came into the room this evening, your hips swishing side to side, pretty smile on your face for him.
>I think I made her upset. Simon pinches the bridge of his nose. Johnny, love. Why can’t you listen? He takes a deep breath, trying to relax the worry that’s creeping up the back of his neck. 
Disagreements aren’t for text messages. They’ve learned that the hard way. 
>Take it easy for the rest of the night, then. She’s skittish. He shoots off the recommendation, and then pulls his laptop across his knee, clicking open the email from Kate.
Simon,  Your girl is a ghost. This kind of wipe work is professional level… are you sure she’s a nurse?  I’ve attached everything I could find, but it’s pretty scarce. The name you provided pulled a copy of her NHS nursing license, her taxes, an award she won at work last year, and a COVID vaccination record. No birth certificate, state identification, or public records of any kind, even after a global hand search. Nothing that even proves she exists or is an American except a sealed record from two years ago in the states. It’s not accessible, even for me, which means it could be WITSEC, or a court ordered name change in relation to a domestic violence case. There are 18 states that seal those records to protect the victim, so she could be from anywhere. My gut says it’s probably the latter, which is why she doesn’t exist prior to.  You’ll notice on the vaccine record, she marked ‘unhoused’, and I couldn’t find any lease/rental agreements, sale records, or mortgages in her name.  I wish I had more for you, but she really is a bit of a puzzle. I’ll keep digging.  -K.L. 
There’s an unsettling rattle going off in the front of Simon’s skull. It’s a siren, a smattering of warning bells, and he swallows the rest of the bourbon in one go, embracing the burn that slides down the back of his throat.
Who are you, little bunny? And who are you running from? 
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myfictionaldreams · 4 months
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Safety Measures // Mafia!Stucky x Fem!Reader
Summary: It was the anniversary of Steve and Bucky saving you from your sadistic brother. Usually, it was a time of celebration for you, but this year, you couldn't help but feel paranoid and unsafe.
Extra reading: Last Hope for background context
A/N: Happy New Year, beautiful readers! I hope everyone is well and safe.
Requested by: @theatrelove3000 thank you so so much for the request and all your support with my writing. As always, you're the best!
Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, polyamory, ptsd, anxiety, paranoia, insomnia, discussion of past abuse, domestic fluff, dom/sub undertones, cock warming, subspace (kinda), hurt/comfort, new member of the family (yay!), puppy
Words: 4.8k
my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link
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Insomnia was an issue you’d never had to deal with before. Not when you have two of the most powerful men of all of the East Coast tiring you out and wrapped around your body to make you feel safe and content.
However, as the seconds ticked by on the clock position on the nightstand next to the bed, you’d found that your body was willing to do anything but sleep. As midnight struck, any hope that had been inkling in your thoughts was diminished. There you were, half sprawled over Steve’s naked chest, his warmth burning through your skin, with Bucky spooning around your back, sandwiching you thoroughly between the two of them, legs crisscrossed between one another.
Even in the safe embrace, your heart continued to palpate painfully in your chest with such powerful thumps you were worried it would wake one of your lovers.
It was always this day. This date. Every year, that sprung fear through your soul, with the memories of your past returning to haunt you. Before Bucky. Before Steve or either of their safety and love, you’d been involved with your family business, reigned by your sadistic brother, Enzo, who was both hateful and abusive, causing you to live a life that was not worth living at all.
For countless years, you’d simply been floating through life, doing anything your brother demanded to benefit his gang. There was no hope, love, or light in your life until the men whose arms you were wrapped tightly in found you, saved you, and showed you what life was about. It hadn’t been an easy adjustment, especially with the violent and bloody end to your brother, but then readjusting to the newfound freedom had taken its toll. The anxiety from your past still haunts you to this very day.
In truth, in the first few years surrounding your brother's death anniversary, you’d celebrated the beginning of your new happiness and life. However, as you grew older and had to live through the dangers of being in the most infamous mafia gang in Brooklyn, your optimistic perspective became somewhat fragile with the realities of becoming close to losing everyone and everything you loved on multiple occasions.
So now, when this dark day loomed over your head once more, your anxiety rose along with the reminder of the horrors that you’d experience throughout your lifetime. Paranoia blossomed into something that was logically not plausible, frightened that somehow, Enzo would return and take you back to the hell hole he once kept you contained within.
These fears had been discussed with both Steve and Bucky on multiple occasions, as well as your friends, who promptly reminded you that nowhere was safer on earth than with all of them. There was 24/7 surveillance within the office and your home, guards patrolling, all armed and trained, as well as having the enhanced bodies of your boyfriends always at your side.
You were safe.
Safe.
And yet, still, there you lay. Wide awake, breaths shallow, trying to remain as quiet as possible so that you may listen to any sounds of intruders walking through your home. It is an impossible feat to do either way due to the pounding of your heartbeat without your ears, the repetitive thump and drum that increased in speed over the minutes. Your palms were becoming clammy where they were resting on Steve’s chest, a faint tremble beginning to throb through your limbs as well. You closed your fingers into a tight fist, attempting to cease the shaking whilst blowing out a long breath as the clock ticked to 00:01 am.
It was no use. You couldn’t do it anymore. Couldn’t just simply lay there and wait to be attacked or taken.
Carefully as you could, you attempted to climb out of your fierce hold, but due to your fragile state and the firm grip of Steve and Bucky, the movements stirred them both awake.
“Baby? Everything ok? Where are you going?” Steve asked, still half asleep but attempting to rouse himself more by rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.
“Sorry”, you whisper into the darkness, “I just needed to use the bathroom”. The lie trembled from your lips as you clumsily searched the bedroom floor for some clothing to cover your naked body. From the smell of the shirt that you were now tugging over your head, you’d found Bucky’s t-shirt in the dark. As your eyes adjusted to remain in the darkness, you could see Bucky moving closer to Steve on the bed, his face resting on the blonde's chest, replacing where you’d been.
The sight had you smiling for a split second before a rustle of the wind against the windows drew your frightened attention back to reality. Stepping into the bathroom and shutting the door behind you, there was a stalling moment where the walls seemed to close around you. Strangling. Suffocation. The fears of your past squeezing closer.
“No”, you chastise yourself in a whisper barely audible as you take a single sweeping step towards the sink, running the cold water to splash it on your face. “Enzo is dead. Stop freaking out, you’re being ridiculous!”. Yes, you were having a conversation with yourself, but only because it was a coping mechanism before you completely lost your mind and had a panic attack.
“Get a hold of yourself!”, you continue the monologue whilst staring at your distressed reflection in the mirror. “You’re safe here in your home”. For some reason, your bottom lip began quivering with the rising emotions and the overwhelming urge to cry. Giving your body a thorough head-to-body shake and angrily wiping away the traitorous tears dripping down your cheeks, you also gave yourself stern talking.
“Either you get yourself together, or you embarrass yourself and wake up Steve and Bucky”. You wouldn’t, not when it was something as irrational as being frightened that your definitely deceased deranged brother would somehow return from the dead to steal you to a life of misery. You couldn’t stomach waking them from their slumber to see the sad puppy eyes they would give you as they told you all the things you already knew. You were safe with them; they’d never let anything bad happen.
Filling your lungs with air, you blew out a long, slow breath until your lungs were completely empty. “Right. One search of the house and back to bed”, you decided, needing to check the surroundings with the hopes it would ease your battle with anxiety and insomnia.
Upon leaving the ensuite bathroom, you were thankfully greeted by the sound of two distinctively soft snores from both men still lying together in bed. Tip-toeing past them and into the hallway, you made sure to keep the lights off with your eyes having adjusted to the darkness as you approached Steve’s office.
There were a few things that you needed from this room. Firstly, to check the security camera feeds from his laptop, showing every angle possible surrounding the house and inside the many rooms of the luxury property. The baseball bat was also hiding beneath the desk. It was one of many weapons stashed throughout your home, carefully placed by both Bucky and his bodyguard Natasha and even though a gun would be a swifter finale for any intruder, there were still more consequences if you were to shoot the firearm accidentally and hit the wrong target whereas, with a bat, you could still keep someone at arm's length and also not fatally wound a friend if they came knocking at the door.
Clutching the smooth bat in both of your trembling hands, you watched the screen, flicking between rooms and areas of the exterior of your home, not spotting a single leaf out of place. In fact, the only emotion that seemed to bloom through your chest was adoration as you stared at the bedroom video feed, noticing that Bucky was now the bigger spoon, wrapped thoroughly around Steve, whose hands were stretched out to your side of the bed, like in his unconscious state, he was still searching for you.
Guilt settled heavily in your stomach at the sight, and closed the laptop with a sigh. You knew this paranoia would fade by the time tomorrow came around. Still, it was completely illogical for you to react rationally today, so with a sigh that echoed around the office, you stood and began to search the property physically.
Holding the bat at arm's length, you peeked around corners first then swung before stepping out. You'd been trained to use all the weapons scattered throughout the house with Steve, Bucky, and Natasha, even with how to strike with a baseball bat effectively.
Every shift of shadows out of the corner of your eyes and every creak of the house naturally settling or knocking with the raging winds outside had your heart racing and senses going into full alert.
One check of the house turned into four full sweeps to ensure no one was there. It was also a slow and thorough check, so by the time you were stepping carefully through the kitchen, glancing out of the back window and into the dark abyss that was your back garden. The creak of footsteps echoed from upstairs; you’d become lost and disorientated on the search, and you had neglected to check the time.
05:03 am.
A sniffle and quiet cough followed the footsteps of the man who had decided to wake earlier than most. In a rush of adrenaline and the need to not be found with a baseball bat in hand like a crazy lady in the dark, you decided to hide the weapon in one of the kitchen cupboards and quickly pretended to be preparing coffee as the sleepy steps wandered down the carpeted stairs.
Placing two cups onto the kitchen counter, you almost held your breath in anticipation for the morning grumbly welcome by whoever had woken first. Steve and Bucky both like to be awake early, much to your usual pleas for them to stay in bed.
However, as the man walked into the kitchen, not a single word was shared as he stepped up close behind you, enveloping your body in a warm and metal arm, wrapping tightly around your waist and pulling you backwards until flush against a naked chest. Stubbled cheeks nuzzled into your neck as lips gently kissed the sensitive skin as you sighed, eyes closing and all tension diminishing into the floor at the feeling of finally being safe.
The two of you swayed on the spot, wrapped in the tight embrace, listening to the water in the coffee pot. One of your hand gripped onto the metal fingers, feeling the smooth material beginning to warm and match the temperature of your skin. The other hand lifted to rest on the back of his head, scratching his buzzed hair, earning a comforting moan from Bucky as he kissed your jaw.
“It’s a rare day when you’re awake before me”, Bucky whispers into the shell of your ear before kissing it. Goosebumps lined your body with the gruff tone of his early morning voice. He didn’t pester you any more about why you were awake at this time, but he did pinch the hem of your shirt. “Is it your plan to always wear my shirts so I must be topless?”
His words pulled a giggle from your lips, shaking your head as you poured the coffee into each cup. “I don’t know what you’re talking about”.
The two of you sat at the dining room table, coffee in one hand and in the other you held onto one another, admiring the night turn into the day with dawn breaking over the fences that lined the back garden. It was blissful and a welcomed distraction from the terrors beneath your surface.
Steve eventually joined, groaning about waking up alone as he kissed you, then Bucky on the back of the head. “Who knew the big grown mafia boss could be so needy?” Bucky quipped with a teasing smirk over the rip of his cup before taking another glug of the coffee.
“That’s a lot of sass for someone who will be going without any breakfast if he keeps it up”, Steve grumbles as he looks through the refrigerator to start preparing the three of you breakfast like he did on most mornings. Before Bucky could respond, Steve asked curiously, “Why is there a baseball bat in with the plates?”
Your eyes downcast to stare into your empty cup, shrugging your shoulders at the burning stares of your boyfriends. “I don’t know. Anyway, who wants a fresh coffee?”
Thankfully, nothing more was mentioned regarding the random appearance of the baseball bat as the three of you ate and prepared to head into the office. You were thankful for the distraction working in the gang gave you, especially on a stressful day like today. Although the paranoia and anxiety that had kept you awake still bubbled away beneath the surface.
On the car journey to work, even squished between Steve and Bucky in the back seats, their hands eagerly resting on the naked skin of your thighs, having pushed the dress up to have the contact. Even your bodyguard and best friend Sam, who was driving the vehicle, couldn’t ease the panic that came from every car horn that blared, the dangerously speeding vehicles that passed or just the erratic driving that was expected with other idiots on the road.
Every single disruption had you anticipating that the car you were in would be hit or stopped, and your brother would then arrive and drag you away. Of course, this didn’t happen, and as you came to work, another heavy sigh released from your body as you walked through the extensive security to get to the office.
New shipments of discreetly stolen goods had arrived, which was a welcome distraction for you, checking the quality and organising where and to whom it would be sold. This only lasted for an hour before the coldness began to creep in, and you made excuses to return to Steve and Bucky back in the office.
“You know you can talk to us, right?” Bucky reminds you carefully whilst pulling your chair closer to his. You couldn’t meet his intense stare as you shifted your body under his awaiting arm so you were cuddled close to his side.
“Yep”, you respond casually, leaning into his warmth.
Bucky’s face lowered to your ear as he stroked his fingers down your arm. “And you also know you’re safe with me. With Steve. In this building or home. I’d do anything to keep you safe, Doll”.
You smile politely at him, trying to ignore the guilt that, for some reason, passed over you as you reached to take his hand that was draped over your shoulders. “I know”.
Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Bbcky checking his phone for the 15th time in an hour. Not that you’d been counting.
Finally, he seemed to receive the notification he’d been waiting for as he suddenly sprung up from his seat, pulling his leather jacket swiftly.
A frown settled over your features as you sat forward, “where are you going?”
Bucky glanced towards Steve first before addressing your question. “I’ve just got some errands to run, nothing special. I won’t be long, Sweetheart”.
He was leaving you. On a day when you needed him most so that you felt safe, he for some reason had to go.
You stood abruptly, pushing back your chair and taking urgent steps towards him whilst nervously playing with your fingers. “You’re going to leave me on my own!”
“Who am I? The milkman?” Sam joked from where he was standing near the door, and you instantly regretted the words, having not meant them that way. What’s worse is that Steve muttered something under his breath from his desk and now you were riddled with more guilt as Bucky’s sad eyes turned to you, his hands resting heavily on your shoulders.
“I won’t be long, and maybe you’ll get a surprise later.” He tried to bring a smile to your lips, but it was worthless as you were caught between staring at Sam and Steve, trying to find the words to apologise. Bucky breathed heavily through his nose at seeing you distraught, but then his phone pinged again, so with one last kiss to your temple, he made his way to the exit.
Turning to Sam whilst awkwardly rubbing your cheek to ease the burning of embarrassment under your skin, you attempted to apologise, but Steve cut off your sentence. “I’m sorr-”.
“Baby, come here”.
Turning towards the comforting voice, you saw that Steve’s full attention was now on you. He’d moved his seat away from his desk and opened his arm, a clear sign for you to approach, which you did with rushed steps before climbing into his warm, sturdy lap. Your knees rested on either side of his thighs as your fingers caded through the curling blonde hair at the nape of his neck which you were quick to bury your face into, breathing in his calming cologne.
“I’m sorry about the comment; I didn’t mean it like that. I know I’m not alone. My head is just all over the place and-”.
“Shh, I know, baby, you don’t need to explain yourself. I know you’d rather us both be around for you today”. There it was. The one small mention and reference made by someone else that this was a day that you hated. It’s not that it needed to be spoken about as it had been clear that both of your boyfriends had been trying their hardest to be there for you today by being at your side as much as possible, constantly checking in with your emotions and making sure you ate and drank enough.
But Steve saying it out loud seemed to make it all the more real, so as you clung to him with more desperation, his arms did just the same until it felt as if there wasn’t a single part of you that wasn’t currently being touched by his giant frame.
“I love you, Steve, so much”, you plead to him in a tired daze, finally feeling somewhat safe now that you were crowded into his body.
“I’d do anything for you, baby girl, you know that. I love you too. Try and get some sleep; it’ll make the day go faster”.
You wanted to and knew you could if you’d let your eyes drop close, but something still wasn’t sitting right like an itch that needed to be scratched.
“Could I please make one request… sir?” you say, nerves beginning to flicker through your chest at the intimacy of the request, already starting to switch into the role of the submissive mind, especially after the fragile state you’d been in all day.
Steve seemed to straighten his posture at using the name, and his lips kissed the top of your head a few times before he responded, “Anything”.
Lifting your head away from his neck and gazing into the endlessly intense blue eyes that always looked so kindly down at you, you asked, “Please can we touch everywhere? I just want to sit and be close”.
Steve tried not to smile at the innocence and the way you couldn’t even say the words, ‘Please can I cock warm you?’ which he knew was what you were asking. Reaching between your bodies, he began to undo his belt and zipper, “You know you don’t need to ask, Sweetheart. I want you to feel comfortable”.
You could never explain to someone why you loved the thought of cock warming so much. It seemed to settle both your nerves and put you into a relaxing state. Not at all times, though. Half the time, it would just turn you into a horny, wet mess that ended with you riding the cock until at least three orgasms. But other times, such as now, you just needed to be stretched and feel as close to Steve as possible.
Lifting higher onto your knees, you moved aside your underwear and lifted the front of your dress as you manoeuvred yourself to accommodate the toe-curling length that was Steve Rogers. Through your groaning sigh, you couldn’t hear Steve’s matching noise as he made sure you were comfortable with a steading arm around your hips before shuffling his seat closer to the desk and continuing with his work and talking to Sam about an email he’d just received.
You were asleep before hearing the end of the email being read out. Your head is resting on his shoulder, hands loosely holding onto the material of his crisp navy blue shirt. You were warm, full and safe.
Hours later, as the sun began to set and the day passed, you were still drowsy, much more relaxed than you had been in the morning. You’d wake up to Steve packing his belongings and Sam saying he’d warm the car for you and Steve.
As you gathered your disorientated thoughts and tried to sit up, you noticed that Steve was very much still thoroughly hard inside of your soaked cunt. Silently, you thanked whatever super serum had been injected into him during his time in the army. You clenched at the realisation, and Steve hummed in contentment at realising you were waking up.
“Let’s get you home. Bucky’s waiting there for us”,  Steve informed quietly whilst cupping your cheek tenderly.
With the position you’d been sitting in, your legs were sore and tense, but Steve was more than happy to carry you down, even with his cock still inside. However, with the movements of his steps, it caused his length to ease in and out of your already sensitive cunt that by the time you’d made it to the car, you were clinging desperately to his shoulders as an orgasm rushed through you, pulsing between your legs.
Steve’s knees nearly buckled as he rested your frame against the side of the car, his face dropping to your neck as he breathed you in deeply. Your cunt continued to clench around his cock until he, too, joined you in euphoria with a deep grunt and a snap of his hips; warmth flooded your hole and began dripping out and onto the floor. Neither of you or his employees batted an eyelid as both of you came. 
Once in the car, you were so distracted with cleaning each other up that the idiots in other vehicles that had panicked you on the way in, didn’t remotely phase you.
Wishing Sam a good night, you and Steve walked up to your front door, hand in hand. Steve opened the front door for you, letting you walk into the living room first, where you abruptly stopped, causing the blonde to nearly knock into you.
“I promise I tried to stop him, but he’s a feral little beast!” Bucky exclaimed from where he sat on the floor, surrounded by something that could only be described as chaos.
It seemed all of the decorative pillows had been utterly destroyed as the contents of the fluff covered all of the surfaces. Not only this, but there were half-eaten shoes, and the corners of the couches and coffee table seemed to have tiny bite marks gnawed into them.
“Bucky?! What did you do?” You couldn’t even comprehend where the mess began and ended as you looked at your dishevelled boyfriend sitting on the floor. Well, he was more lying down, reaching beneath one of the couches as he began to sit up and plastered a wide, toothy grin towards you.
“Surprise!” Bucky shouts with exhausted joy as Steve sighs with a shaky laugh from behind you.
“Surprise? What kind of a surprise is my home being destroyed?” you say, gobsmacked, staring longingly at your favourite cushions ripped to shreds.
As Bucky opened his mouth to explain, a tiny yap sounded from beneath the furniture where he’d just been reaching, and suddenly, a bundle of black fur was pounding for your ankles. It took you a second to drop to your knees and gasp, reaching for the puppy.
“Careful! His teeth are viscous”, Bucky warns, trying to reach forward to grab the animal, but you beat him to it and pull the pup into your lap.
“Oh my god, look at you! Aren’t you just the most beautiful little thing! Was it you that destroyed my lovely cushions? It was, wasn’t it? That’s okay. I forgive you. I’ll forgive you for everything. You're just so damn cute!” you couldn’t help but talk in a childishly high voice as you spoke to the adorable little puppy.
Thankfully, he didn’t bite you with his tiny sharp teeth and instead rolled onto his back on your legs, his paws resting in the air as he waited for a belly rub you happily gave him with carefully placed head kisses.
“You didn’t tell me you were getting a new guard dog! And what happened to the rule of not letting them into the house?” you asked Bucky as you continued to pet the pup.
Steve squatted down next to you, reaching to stroke the puppy behind his ears but then quickly retreating as the tiny sharp teeth nearly nipped his fingers. “He’s not going to be a guard dog; he’s going to be your dog”.
Your head spun with how fast you looked between your boyfriends as you screamed, “What?!”
“Yep! He’s all yours. He’s a Rottweiler and is eight weeks old. They’re known to be a protective breed and great guard dogs, so we will have him properly trained a couple of times a week for this, but we also want him to be yours”. As Bucky explained he knelt closer which earned the attention of your new puppy who watched him closely but continued to lick your fingers in between as you scratched the top of his head.
Steve rested a firm hand on your lower back as he continued, “We know how difficult today is, even with our reassurance that you are safe from Enzo”. Even just hearing his name, your whole body tightens and locks, almost forgetting to breathe until a certain puppy begins to wiggle and try and jump up your body to attempt to lick your face, having noticed the change in demeanour. “We wanted there to be someone around for you all the time, just with the chance that you could still feel safe if Bucky or I weren’t by your side. So, we are hoping this little rascal will be able to do this”, Steve says playfully, stroking along the puppy's back but quickly withdrawing when he nearly nipped again.
“Thank you. Both of you. I don’t even know where to begin with telling you how amazing this gift is”, you say brightly, glancing between the two men you loved most in the world.
“Don’t thank us; it’s the least we could do”, Steve mutters whilst leaning in to kiss your cheek and then standing up, beginning to grab handfuls of fluff from all the surfaces with an attempt at cleaning up the mess.
“I just want you to be happy”, Bucky whispers whilst kissing your other cheek, but then his gaze moves to the puppy, and a line forms between his brows as he frowns. “There will be some ground rules, though. No dog on the couch or in bed. We need boundaries”.
You nod your head in understanding but lean closer to whisper to the pup loud enough that Steve and Bucky could still hear. “Don’t listen to the grumpy old man. You can stay wherever you’d like!”
Bucky sighs whilst rolling his eyes and begins to help Steve with cleaning.
The three of you were sat in front of the TV watching a late-night film. The four of you were sitting on the couch as the puppy was resting in your lap, exhausted from all the playing you’d been doing and now resting as you tried to think of a name for the little guy.
“What about Winchester? That’s a good dog name, right?” you ask the boys, but mostly the dog, hoping he would react to one of the suggestions, but he hasn’t succeeded so far. You pondered some more whilst petting his little black ears. “Oh, what about Sargeant?! No… what about Rogers? No…”. You gave up trying to think of a name off the top of your head and began to scroll for suggestions online.
“Max? Brutus? Thor? Um, nope, these aren’t good. Chase? Ari? Bullet? Dodger? Bli-” Your suggestions stop as the puppy’s head tilts to look at you, seeming more awake. “What is it? Is it one of the names? Ari?” No response, “Bullet?” still no response. “Dodger?” his precious little tail began to wag as he yapped.
“Dodger? You like that name?” he barked again, attempting to climb higher up your body to lick your face as you laughed fondly.
“Dodger it is”, Steve announced from your side with a smile.
1K notes · View notes
14thgalerie · 7 months
Text
dreamin' of him
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• pairing: theodore nott x reader
• now playing: a little death by the neighbourhood / fuck it i love you by lana del rey
• word count: 5.7k
• genre: fluff
— a part of this is inspired by this scenario i saw on tiktok, can't exactly remember it which vid it was. anyways enjoy this little random scenario that i'm pretty sure is horrible because i didn't bother to proofread it again.
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You shot right up from your sleep, limbs tangled in the sheets that had been strewn about haphazardly. The room is still as dark as it had been when you fell asleep with only the faint light of the full moon serving as your guiding light.
You drop your head onto your hands that sit on your folded knees, pressing the heels of your palm into your eyes until you can only see white. Ignoring the pain only so that you can be rid of the images that keep flashing in your mind.
It was excruciating, it played like a broken VHS record on your parents’ television back home. Every millisecond, a frame of you in such a vulnerable embrace with–
No. Y/N, stop it.
You were grappling with your sanity, feeling yourself incredulous at how such an idea came to fruition in your mind. Several nights’ on the end of this senseless, out-of-the-world dream that popped out of nowhere. The both of you hardly spoke with one another, for Merlin’s sake.
Throwing your head back, giving up on forcing the images out of your thoughts. Your head was spinning. Slamming your temple against the solid, wooden headboard behind you until you hear a ring resonating through your ears.
How did you let yourself get into this? What happened that you are being haunted— if that’s what you would even call it — by these dreams?
It’s been days of sleepless nights and you are plain tired. He must have cursed you. There was no other reason for this, right? He could be annoying when he wanted to be.
With your back resting on the headboard, you see that your dorm mates haven’t gotten back yet. Still, you remain seated as you wonder where they are, staring at the open window to your right.
“You’re the only one that can do this to me, Y/N…”
You gasp and sit straight, slapping your forehead with your open palm, trying to chase the image away. Throwing a glance at your watch that sits on the bedside table, you see that it’s only an hour and a half before you are supposed to wake up.
Exhaling loudly, you shove the blankets away from your body, feeling a warmth creep up on you. Maybe a good, cold, and long shower will distract you for good.
Grabbing a change of clothes, you head straight for the bathroom in your dorm. Now’s one of the few times you are glad that the dorms at Hogwarts have their own showers. 
Looking at the small, worn mirror above the sink, you chuckle humorlessly at how disheveled your appearance is. Anyone who sees you right now might think that your dreams are last night’s reality.
Stepping under the painful cold water, your body unconsciously jolts at the shock. 
Thinking about it makes your heart race. It gives you jitters, too. The feeling wasn't much to your liking. It was distracting. Not to mention it made you feel so... vulnerable. A shiver ran up your spine. You paused for a breath to calm your heightened nerves.
This has to end soon. You couldn’t stand another night spent thinking of him, of all people.  
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“I uh- I need to go.” You cough, clearing your throat, hands shaking slightly as you move to stand up. “I still have this essay for Potions.” 
“What- Hey wait, Y/N!” Harry reaches out, nearly missing your arms. 
“Why are you suddenly running off? It’s not due until next week?” Giving you a worried look. “Are you alright?”
“Yes, Harry. I feel extraordinarily perfect, I just- I wanna go back to my room right now.” You sigh, looking up at him. Your body remains tense under his tight grip. “So please let me go.”
Harry tries to not look disappointed, giving a quick glance back at your two other friends who watch you in silence. “Alright then, but if you need anything, you know where to find us.”
Giving him a small nod before pivoting in your heel, you walked straight to the Great Hall's large entryway. You ignored the way your skin burned with the intensity of the searing eyes that had locked onto you since its entry. 
“Why did you leave in such a hurry?” A cool voice asks from behind you. 
You freeze.
“Pardon?” You conjure up a reply, bluntly.
“Ok- what’s got your knickers in a twist?” 
“Nothing!” You reply defensively. Wanting nothing more than to be back within the confines of your dorm room.
“Alright, alright. I got it.” The cool, calm voice waves off an erratic rhythm to your heart. You continue to stare forward along the corridor, paying no mind as he circles around until there is a face attached to the voice. “I was just wondering why you skittered out of the Hall faster than when you were caught by Filch with the Weasley twins.”
Tilting your chin towards your chest, “What do you want, Nott?”
“Nothing.” He shrugged, “I was just curious, that is all.”
You scoff at the mockery clear in his tone. “Seriously, what is it? Because if you’re only here to be an annoying twat, I have better places to be.” 
You purposely bump into his shoulder as you make your way past him. Not in the mood to play along with him right now. Not when that stupid smirk of his is reeling images that you have been tirelessly trying to be rid of. Images that are the cause of your cranky attitude in the mornings.
From the corner of your eyes, you see him cock his head slightly to the right. Another thing you hate. He becomes more incessantly annoying when you are visibly annoyed by him.
“Nott.” You warn.
“What?“ He asks, amusement clear in his tone. “Am I not allowed to walk the same grounds that you do now?”
“Walk elsewhere. I am quite sure that you know of other paths from here to wherever you are to go. With your many endeavors, it’ll be stupid if you didn’t.” You murmur the latter under your breath.
“What was that?” He catches up to you, walking leisurely with his long legs. “Didn’t quite hear that last part properly.”
Before you could reply, a shout from the courtyard called both of your attention. A redhead girl from Ravenclaw was waving in your direction. You turn to look at Theodore who has now turned his sight back to you.
“I think she’s waiting for you.” You swiftly walk towards your house tower, making haste before he follows you again.
Unbeknownst to you, his stare remains fixated on you until your figure disappears around the corner. Only then does he wave back at the girl and make a quick return to the Hall where he left his friends mid-conversation. 
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 It wasn’t the last that you see of Theodore after, nor was it the last morning when you woke up groggy and irritated at the lack of sleep. It seems that since then, the both of you find yourselves orbiting each other much more often than before.
Not that you found it all disappointing. 
There were times that he was a good companion to have around— forget the hooded eyes that left you conscious every time. When he isn’t being an annoying twat, he knew how to hold a conversation with you; your lack of similarities is a good point as you were able to share things that the other didn’t know of.
But in truth, Theodore searched for you. In the boisterous chatters of students in the corridors, between the towering bookshelves of the library, through the window of the dimly lit Potions classroom where he has a clear view of Hagrid’s hut where you and your friends frequent.
He looks for you in all places, unable to help himself from an attempt to have a glimpse of you.
He did give his best efforts to tuck away his inexplainable attraction to you recently, and he wouldn’t dare admit that there is even a chance that he does. His denial was a fortress but cracks appeared within its walls with each time he talks to you.
“She’s at the Hospital Wing.” Blaise hesitatingly brings up. 
He almost jerks up from his comfortable position on the couch where he and Blaise are observers of their other friend’s drunken endeavors. But he manages to grab a hold of himself before the other notices.
“Why bother telling me?” His forced indifference is not as apathetic as he wished it to be. “I don’t care.”
“Oh shut up, Theo. I have never seen you so utterly fond of another girl like you do with her.” Blaise retracts back to what he was gonna say, “Anyways, I hear she will be a volunteer ahead of the Quidditch match this Sunday.”
He doesn’t reply, letting the words of his friend slip from one ear to another. You were interesting. He was unsure how, in the many years you’ve known one another, that you caught his eye now.
“She’s nice, not unlike some of her friends at Gryffindor.” Blaise continues with his taunting, eager to see a reaction from Theo. “Even managed to convince me to be her partner for Herbology.”
Theo makes a noise in a mix between a scoff and a chuckle. “From the sound of how you speak of her, it’s like you’re the one that has caught butterflies.”
Blaise simply hums, nodding to himself. “Maybe.”
Not another word slips from him again. The silence of his relinquishment makes Theo’s heart skip a nervous beat. Blaise never gives up that easily.  
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“Hello there.” A voice makes you look up from your book which you have been drowned in since hours ago. To your surprise, it was Blaise. 
“What are you doing here?” You ask. Curious why he had so suddenly appeared beside you while you were studying. You scour your brain, trying to remember if you had a project with him that ultimately passed by you.
“Go to Hogsmeade with me later.” Blaise blurts out while you gather your books that are scattered along the table. 
“Huh?” You look up at him with wide eyes. You give out a confused laugh. Maybe you didn’t understand him, right? “Did I hear you right? Hogsmeade? The two of us?”
“Well, don’t make it sound like it’s such an atrocious thing.” He makes a sound of mock offense; even making the choice to put a hand above his chest. To which you vehemently shake your head.
“Gosh no! It’s just-“ You trail off. “Why all of a sudden?”
“Nothing at all…” He shrugs, but that look on his face tells you entirely different. The mischievous expression that is ever so slightly slipping through. “Just wanted to hang out with a good friend of mine.”
You look at him with a confused frown, unsure of what he’s doing. “Since when were we good friends? Last I checked we only talked every now and then and it was really only just for projects.”
“Just come with me, will you?” 
“No.” You shake your head to further make your point. “Tell me why first and maybe I’ll consider.”
Blaise sighs, giving up. He had expected that you would not be giving in so easily to his request, after all, you weren’t really that close. But he still thought that it was worth the try, he is tired of Theo acting like he’s better than his emotions. He decides to tell you.
Well… somewhat.
“Alright, lady. I want to make a friend of mine jealous.” You hummed, listening intently. Wondering why he chose you to do it. “Also, because you’re the only person that I genuinely enjoy hanging with from other houses.”
“Will you tell me who’s the friend?” You ask.
“No.” He quickly replies, “But Y/N…I’ll treat you with anything you want at the Three Broomsticks or wherever else. Just please.” He draws out the please, adding hints or really a dump load of sweetness to it to charm you.
You think for a second more before finally giving him a nod. “Ok, but you’ll have to come with me to Honeydukes. Payback for doing whatever it is you’re planning.”
“You can have whatever you want. I’ll wait for you by the Fat Lady.” Blaise tells you before walking off with a huge grin on his face. 
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“Y/N?”
And when you turned your head, a surprised Blaize looked at you with a smile, apparently he had just been in mid-conversation with a fellow Slytherin as he hung about the entrance.
He whistled as he wasted no time approaching you, waving a curt goodbye to his previous companion. 
“Remind me why you never wear clothes other than your uniform?” He asks, his eyes unabashedly trailing over you. Though not in a predatory way that leaves you uncomfortable.
“Because it’s a hassle having to think of an outfit when I could just put a uniform on and call it a day.”
He hums, nodding as he thought about it.
“Well you look good in your non-school clothes, you should wear them more often.” He suggests, although he quickly amends it. “Not that I’m saying you don’t look great normally, it’s just nice to see how you would personally choose the clothes you wear. It kind of reflects a lot of your personality more.”
The two of you make no rush as you travel to Hogsmeade along with the other students, chuckling at the eager third-years who are freely roaming around. Engaging in small talk all the way. 
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“What’s got you in such a sour mood?” You rolled your eyes at Theo, who has done nothing but glare at Blaise who sits beside you with such harsh blinding venom. “If all you plan to do here is to murder Blaise in a million ways inside your mind, then please do it some other time.”
The man beside you couldn’t help the amused choke that escapes him as he sips his glass of Butterbeer.
Theo finally breaks his lone stare down and shifts his attention to you. “Since when did you two hang about by yourselves?”
“We always have-“ Blaise starts to explain but he is cut off by a kick to his shin that makes his knee jerk up and hit the table. 
“I wasn’t talking to you.”
His eyes remained fixated on you still, a medley of emotions behind them that you couldn’t exactly pinpoint. 
“Well, Y/N? I’m waiting for you here.” He impatiently asks. “Are you two on a date?”
“Theo, if you think that we are, then why did you even come here?” You roll your eyes at whatever antics that the both of them are trying. Not realising that you called him by his nickname, usually reserved for his close friends.
“Well-“ He stammered, unable to explain why exactly did he approach you all of a sudden. “Blaise doesn’t have that good of a reputation with girls and I wanted to make sure he’s not trying anything with you.”
Blaise clears his throat in an attempt to remind his friend that he is still sitting at the table, clearly within earshot of whatever slander he’s being put to.
“I can hardly think of a reason why you would if he does, but we were just having a conversation as friends, Theo.” You finally answer. “Is it that much of a surprise that I tolerate one of you?”
“He wants it to be him.” The man beside you mutters under his breath which you ignore, thinking it is only a jab.
Theo once again kicks Blaise under the table, making the latter swear under his breath.
While the two of them bicker like they are some man-child, you spot Hermione and the rest of your friends coming in through a tiny door and sitting at a table by the staircase. You scoot over until you are out of the seat, glad that you chose to sit at the open end of the table, without making a noise.
You make quick haste to transfer to your friends' table without garnering attention from the two Slytherin boys.
“Hide me.” You drop your heavy body on the seat beside Harry, trying your best to hunch over his relatively short upper body. 
The three instead laugh at your obvious demise, Ron not even trying to hide his amusement with such a burst of boisterous laughter. Unlike you, the three had noticed how Theodore Nott had been seen beside you much more often than necessary. At first, it was nothing that they really paid attention to, but when you told them of your otherwise eventful dreams…they began to have other thoughts.
It was clear that both of you were attracted to one another except for yourselves. And it’s been a hilarious sight to be an audience to but they are beginning to tire of your constant zoning off when the other is in your peripheral.
“What even is with you and Blaise coming to Hogsmeade together?” Ron asks. “I thought you liked Nott.”
You exhaled in exasperation, “How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t like him.” Gritting your teeth and clenching your jaw at the blatant teasing. “I am seriously beginning to regret telling you about my dreams.”
You watch as Harry stands to grab drinks for the rest of you guys, trying to explain why you came here. Not forgetting to mention how Theo had suddenly the conversation you’ve been having with Blaise. 
You were shocked to find that the both of you actually shared a lot of the same interests in various aspects; books, music, values, name it all. So despite your previous disinclination to agree with his idea that you would get along well, you thoroughly enjoyed the short time that you spent alone. 
His genuine interest in the many muggle creations that you’ve mentioned has made you all giddy. Telling him of all and everything that he must try, making a mental note to give him some things that you have in your dorm.
On the other end, Blaise shared a few of his interests with you— though it was only very few, given that the wizarding world does not really pay much attention to those kinds of things, especially the purebloods. 
“So just because he bribed you with anything you want from Honeydukes, you agreed? Y/N!” Hermione exclaims, to which you only answer her with wide eyes. 
“What?” You ask, furrowing your eyebrows at the bewildered expression on her face. 
“You’ve been to Hogwarts for how many years now and yet you have no idea what going to Hogsmeade with only one person insinuates?”
“Uh- What?”
“That you two are going on a date of course?” She practically scolds you. Maybe you shouldn’t laugh at Ron anymore when she becomes like this. It's no joke that it feels like you could be the stupidest person on the planet.
“We’re only friends, for Merlin’s sake! Well, we became friends today.” You roll your eyes. “It’s not my fault that is what might people think.”
Harry and Ron look at each other with more than amused grins on their faces.
“I think I finally know why Nott was practically making the snow melt under his feet earlier,” Ron remarks. To which you give him a confused look, unsure what he meant.
“What?”
“Well, before we came in here, we saw Nott almost stomp his way to here. I swear that I actually saw steam coming out of his ears.” Ron exaggeratingly shares, taking a sip out of his pint glass. “I thought he was about to burn this place down to ashes with how he looked so mad.”
That explains why he’s being more moody than usual.
“What’s that got to do with Blaise and I?” You finally ask the question that’s been brewing in you since he mentioned it.
But the only response you get is a look of disbelief from all three of them. Each one just about screaming “Are you being serious?” without saying anything.
“Are you truly that dense Y/N?” Harry asks, his hand reaching out to pat you on the shoulder.
You push him off, glaring at him. “No, but seriously what do you mean?”
“Even Harry and Ron, oblivious as they come, recognise that Nott has some kind of interest in you.” Hermione explains, “I don’t even know if he realised it himself but the two of you are oozing love hearts everywhere you go. It’s torture to see how you both ignore it.”
You're left dumbfounded, feeling her cheeks flush with embarrassment at the mere suggestion. Your thoughts racing as you consider Hermione's words. Theodore Nott, the mysterious and enigmatic Slytherin, having an interest in you? It was a revelation that sent your mind reeling, and you couldn't help but wonder if you had been completely oblivious to his feelings all along.
No. That’s just… wrong. This had to be another one of their pranks again. Ever since you confided in them of your dreams, they’ve been ceaselessly teasing you with Theo. Yeah, this must be it.
You chose to respond in a haughty tone, in an attempt to mask her flustered feelings. “Gosh, if this is what spurs in your minds when I tell you about my struggles at night, then I’d rather just keep them to myself from now on. Find something else to speculate about.” 
Unbeknownst to you, while you were so flustered trying to deny anything and everything they say of you and Theo, Harry, Ron, and Hermione had mentally orchestrated a plan. Harry subtly made a signal to the other two to play along as he saw Theo stand up from his heated conversation with Blaise to approach you four.
With sly smiles quickly masked, they leaned in closer to you and feigned curiosity. 
“Alright then,” Ron begins, “But I heard from Hermione that you had another dream last night. Is it as juicy as last time?” 
Harry chimed in, his eyebrows raised suggestively. “Yes, please spill the details. We’re all ears.”
Caught off guard by their sudden and out-of-place interest.  “I said that I’m never telling you of anything again. And it's not juicy! Please don't ever use that word ever again.” You never wanted to divulge anything related to your rather steamy dreams again to your friends. 
“This is the last time, we promise! And we promise to not annoy you any more with Nott.” Hermione exclaims though you reach out to slap her on her arm at how loudly she said it. Looking around the bustling crowd to see if anyone heard it, confused when you see Blaise sitting with somebody else now, probably some friends from Slytherin, Theo nowhere in sight.
Little did she know that Theo had indeed overheard their conversation and as he was slowly nearing their table, curiosity piqued as he heard his name. He slowed in his steps, waiting to hear more.
Your face turned an even deeper shade of crimson as you think back to last night, a bit different— a whole lot different. The dream had left you truly confused because it was nothing like the otherwise steamy ones you had. It was unsettlingly normal, and it has left you with a sense of unease that left you unable to sleep properly, terrified at what this means.
 You cleared your throat, trying to maintain some semblance of composure. "Well, it was just a, you know, like the ones I told you. Nothing too different. I still hate it."
Hermione's eyes sparkled with mischief as she leaned in, feigning innocence. "From the look on your face, it seems to be different. Tell us about it, pretty please."
You hesitated but then began to describe the dream in the most vague and unassuming way possible, but you knew no matter what you said, they would use this to tease you endlessly. "Alright, alright. So, in the dream, I was in the Black Lake, and there was a gentle, warm breeze. I was walking with someone, and it was peaceful. It was like…everything is normal. No war, no problems, no animosity, just us walking like any normal person.”
Harry and Ron exchanged knowing glances, while Hermione continued to prod gently. "And who were you walking with, Y/N?"
Your gaze darted around the table, avoiding eye contact. Not seeing how their eyes slightly shifted behind you. "Well, it was just someone... you know, a dream version of someone I know. Like you don’t know already."
Hermione shook her head, “Yeah but this is different, so it must be somebody else right?”
“Hermione…It’s Theo, who else.” 
"Y/N…" You hear a voice behind you call out in a low tone, with a thread of voice. 
Your eyes widen, filled to the brim with alertness and humiliation. Your mother was right, one day this mouth will get you in trouble— not that it hasn’t been proven countless times before— but now nothing made you want to become more one with the ground than this moment.
You swallow hard and turn around, instantly the mortification in your features becomes tenfold. There it is— the stupid, bloody smirk that is always present on his stupid, pretty face when he has caught you red-handed. 
“Don’t.” You warn.
He leans his entire weight back on the wooden post behind him, staring down at you with a look of satisfaction, unapologetically reveling in your obvious embarrassment.
“Oh, but I must.” He drawls, his eyes gleaming with mischief.
Your frustration surges as you fold your arms, attempting to salvage a shred of dignity in this awkward moment. You give him a glare before turning back front facing to the table.
“You are truly insufferable, you know that?”
Without even being able to see it, you already know that his grin widens at your reply. “Guilty, I’m afraid.”
Theo pushed himself off the wooden post and sauntered closer to where you were sitting, making your heart stutter. The playful glint in his eyes brings forth an image that you would rather not see right now.
"But what's the fun in letting you off the hook so easily? It’s not every day that I find out somebody has been kept awake all night because of me."
You could only continue to cast a withering look at him as you shook your head. "You just love tormenting me, don't you?"
He sits down on the seat next to you, ignoring the other occupants who have reserved to remain quiet. Truly enjoying the show that you, unfortunately, are the star of. He inches closer to you until you can almost feel your eyelashes flutter at his breath.
“Only because I quite enjoy how flustered you can be.” He admits softly, and in that moment the playful teasing in his voice gives way to something else.
A different kind of tension. 
Not one that you would like to be a part of.
“Well, that would be the last of it.” 
Theo and your friends are left bewildered when you suddenly stand and disappear among the group of rowdy students.
His eyebrows furrow and his gleaming expression turns into one of confusion and a hint of hurt and disappointment. “What just happened?”
When he finally turns to look at your friends, all they do is share uneasy glances with each other. They were unsure of how to respond to Theo’s question when they could hardly comprehend what had only occurred.
Hermione opens her mouth to say something but closes it once more when the words in her mind are a jumble.
“Astronomy Tower.” He hears someone say. His cerulean blue eyes that somehow turned grey shifted to the bespectacled boy sitting a chair away from him. “Go.” 
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“Why did you run off?” You ignore the voice that shatters the silence. The bristles of the wind brush against your clothes. Your head thrumming as the sound of your shoes clicking against the concrete permeates into the air. 
He calls you by your name with a gentleness that sends tingles down your spine. But yet again, you ignore him. Choosing to stare intently at the rust that forms by the railing in front of you, the complex chemical reaction is seemingly more interesting to you now. 
“Y/N please…I don't know what’s going on your mind right now but we need to talk.” He moves to stand next to you, placing his arms on the barrier. “I will say it, no matter if you want to listen or not. We clearly have feelings for each other.”
You want to say that you are surprised that he is being so straightforward right now, but it’s evident that someone had to stop whatever dance the both of you had been playing at for the past month already. 
 “And that’s confirmed by what I heard earlier.” He chuckles in an attempt to lighten up the mood. “Gods, I hate you so much.”
“Your dreams say otherwise.” He continues with his teasing.
“Stop it. As if you’re any better with how you acted with Blaise earlier.” You hit him back. “Blaise is an annoying ass who meddles in my business way more often than necessary. But I guess he did one thing right.”
“What?” You ask, turning your body to lean on the railing, facing him.
“He kept bothering me about you, and I guess he got tired and decided to make a move leading us to this moment.” 
“He can be pretty persuasive when he wants to be." You agree. Silence befalling after.
“Gods, I don’t know what happened but it’s you.” He breathes heavily.  
A laugh escapes your chest, “If somebody came to us two months ago and told us that we’d be acting like this, I would think they’re mental.”
Theo grins at you, making you giggle to see the little fang on the corner of his mouth. He places his hands on your cheeks and cradles your face, making a move to press his forehead to yours as he nears.
The vivid, flashing images of Theo from your dreams doesn’t hold a candle to the real thing. The skin under his touch tingled and it made you itch to reach out with your fingertips, feeling as if you would crumble beneath his hands.
You pull away to stare up at him. The cold that typically veils over his eyes are gone as they reciprocate your stare with an even warmer touch. Every nerve ends in you lighting up with a golden electricity.
Theo opened his mouth, closed it again, opened it once more, and then shut it, apparently struggling to remember how to talk.
So, he decided that actions seem to be your thing anyways, as the two of you are quite horrible at talking.
Carefully, almost as if he’s never done it before, Theo leans forward and presses his lips against yours so gently. All you can think about is him even as you respond to his kiss, melting against the touch. 
He pressed himself into you, attempting to tangle your bodies together. He wants to feel every inch of you against his skin, willing the gods to let you be one. Hell, he wanted to climb into your ribcage and possibly live out the rest of his days inside your heart.
You gasp as his hands creep under your shirt and trail along your lower back, though he doesn’t wander. He takes this as an opportunity to slip his tongue inside your mouth, exploring eagerly.
You tilt forward, answering his devotion with an equal eagerness. In your distraction, your hands slide from their hold on his shirt and travel until your fingertips meet behind his nape.
This goes for a while before a sudden splash from the waters below you makes you jump apart, though still very much physically attached. His arms were still tightly wound around your waist.
“I think that’s a sign we should stop for now.”
“Yeah, definitely.”
Laughter met in the air between you—sweet, short, intertwined. Although you would like to have another one of your dreams to come true, you want to take it slow. The idea that he thought of you as you did to him has still not truly sunk into your mind.
Even now as he leans his face slightly towards yours again and begins to leave soft, tender kisses all over your cheek, making butterflies appear in your stomach.
“Gods, I just realised something.” You laugh all of a sudden, making him stand up straight to look at you curiously. “What is it?”
“I just made Ron win a bet for the first time since we all became friends.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, he was the first person to tease me about these stupid dreams–”
“Excuse me, I rather think it’s not.” He interrupts playfully raising an eyebrow. “Shush.”
“Anyways,” You continue, “Harry and Hermione initially thought it was nothing and that it probably would stop after a while— obviously not. So Ron set a bet that I’ll end up having feelings for you or we’ll end up together.”
He chuckles, his eyes glinting with amusement. “I’m still surprised they didn’t hate the idea. With us being in literal houses that hate each other.”  
“They’re only annoyed at some of you, honestly. The ones that perpetuate the ‘Slytherin’ motto too much.” 
"Plus," he continued, the joking tone in his voice fading a bit, "even if they did have complaints, I would have ignored every single one and still pursued you."
“As if! You stormed to Hogsmeade just to interrupt our ‘date’ and you wouldn’t even admit it. If it weren’t for what our friends did, we wouldn’t be having this conversation right now.”
“Let me pretend, for goodness’ sake woman!”
His playful exasperation brought a genuine smile to your face, and for a moment, the world around you seemed to fade as you got lost in the playful banter you're used to with him.
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kiss-me-muchoo · 5 months
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𝐖𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝'𝐯𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝'𝐯𝐞 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝'𝐯𝐞 || 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐠!𝐂𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐬𝐒𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
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part one: I knew you were trouble // part two: would’ve could’ve should’ve
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲_The Capitol's Dream girl was depressed. After Snow broke her heart and returned only to haunt her. It only takes an official marriage proposal on New Year's Day, an interview with Lucky Flickerman and a rebel bombing to completely break you, and make Snow realize there's a place for one last person to love for the rest of his life.
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬_ 10k words fic ups, reader is depressed, blood, violence, angst, tears, drama, reader makes some cruel things, antidepressants, nothing wild but they have sex so mdni 18+ , Snow actually loves reader (well idk). I couldn't add anything about the games of Mags SORRY.
𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞_main song for this is Would've Could've Should've, song added to my Coryo Copito's playlist. Also, listen to the 1 and memory lane!!!
♪ ♫ Coryo playlist ✰ Index (+ fics here)
____________________________________
Nights were longer now. You couldn't sleep. Nightmares of the games, how you contributed. The vivid image of the first time you saw Clemensia after the snake bite. Your mind made you recreate Sejanus being hanged in District 12. And finally, your mind also made you replay every moment you had with Coriolanus Snow since you met him at 17.
You wished you never asked to sit with him at lunch. You wished you never asked to see him again.
He would've been just another classmate. If the things that happened in the 10th Hunger Games were meant to be, at least you wouldn't have been involved.
It wouldn't have hurt you enough to feel so miserable in the present.
But this was as good as it was going to get.
You weren't the best driver, but since very few people had a car, you dared to take the one your chauffeur was meant to. It distracts you from staring at the window and overthinking.
Sometimes you wonder how it would've turned out if Snow won the prize without being a mentor, just like it was planned to happen. Would you have made a stop at his place? For him to get inside your car and kiss you good morning. Then drive to the University of the Capitol? Could've been fun.
But you made your way alone. Only listening to the music that played on the radio.
And you wondered what would've happened if Arachne was alive, Sejanus too, and Clemensia was fine to take classes in person. Would they have made fun of you and Snow entering University holding hands? Could've been sweet.
But again, you were alone. It's a cloudy day at The Capitol. Your long emerald green coat gets stuck with the car door. You roll your eyes, opening the damn door once again to set free the piece of fabric.
You started wearing high heels. It made you look taller and you loved the sound every time you stepped out of your home. Your mother had launched a new collection, and she loved seeing you wearing her creations.
For the record, you haven't seen Coriolanus Snow since the day you had your first counselor appointment. That was a month ago, and it was… great.
Actually, it wasn't, but yeah…
A lot of people greeted you, but none were your friends. You see, the University isn't very different compared to the Academy. The same architecture, and familiar faces that no longer wear the red uniform. And even so, you feel like a fish out of water.
Life isn't perfect. But you weren't ready to start your young adult days feeling so out of breath.
"Y/n!…" you turn to encounter Persephone. A sweet girl from the Academy.
"Persephone. Hi…" You do your best to smile. She was a classmate from the Academy. And she never was your friend but you always thought she was so sweet.
"How have you been? You're all over the news" For the first time in weeks you giggle, feeling a little blushed. The feeling of someone asking you how you were doing felt so good.
"I've had better days. But here we are… And you?" She tilts her head.
"I visited my grandma's lake house in District 4. It was so good. I heard you're in the science and law program" you nod. You also knew Persephone was on the law program.
"Yeah, you're in law too…."
"Is Coriolanus going to be there too?" You stop smiling.
In fact, you weren't sure. But probably he would also be in law. Tigris once said he wanted to pursue politics.
"I'm not sure… We-…we don't talk anymore" she gasped in shock.
"What? Oh, I'm so sorry. I thought you were…"
"No. But it's fine. He must be doing great…" you cut her off before she can ask more questions.
Your first class was okay. Until Snow walked in, wearing a perfect dark blue suit. His silly hair looked slightly longer than the last time you saw him, but still, nothing compared to his messy hair from months ago. You pretend you didn't see him, opting to keep writing something in your journal. But he had to stop beside you. There are some minutes of silence, but nothing would make you turn to knowledge of his presence.
"Can I sit with you?" His voice is colder again. You can notice through a little glimpse of a white rose decorating his suit. But you keep your eyes set on the page in front of you.
And you know you won't fail again.
"No."
He can feel the venom in your voice.
"I'm sitting here." He says after all.
You really don't have time to tear up on the first day of University. You want to stand up and leave, but you're so mature that you won't say anything else.
At least, for the rest of the class, he doesn't say anything else, but you know he occasionally turns to see you.
"Is it gonna be like this forever?" He asks when it's over. You dare to see him in the eyes, enchanting blue as always. But the young man in front of you isn't the boy you met. And yet, he still made your heart beat like he was the same who was once your lover.
"I don't have time for this. Have a nice day, Snow'' he looks as you leave the classroom. His hands shook, and that feeling of guilt assaulted him once again. You are the proof alive of all the pain he caused. So he needs to have you back on his side, so he can feel some humanity remaining in him after all the things he did months ago. Because he knows there's no good left on him, but he can't get rid of you like he did with Sejanus, Highbottom… and Lucy Gray.
You were meant for him. But he was so infatuated with the other girl. And Snow was aware that you deserve the best. You were his ally since day one. So having you by his side again… would seal his imaginary pact.
He looks at you and sees the girl that gave him the chance of his life. He promised his grandma'am you would be the girl he would give a home and a family.
But now, every time he asked Tigris how you were, she avoided giving details. grandma'am was growing suspicious that things weren't going great. Tigris had been a lot of times on your house and mother's shows. Your father would ask for Coriolanus but he didn't know all the things the young man did to his daughter.
So Tigris would say he was still serving as a peacekeeper. And you, you would say you haven't talked a lot with him.
Not anymore. Coriolanus would try every day. As he denied he loved you, he pretended he needed you as you were the one. Just that.
"Y/n y/l/n." Suddenly a peacekeeper comes to you.
"Yes?" You ask politely.
"Dr. Gaul demands your presence in her laboratory" you sigh. Of course, she would be the first to ask to see you.
It was the same laboratory. Only that now was near. The way to get there was slow, even peaceful. Maybe because the day was almost over.
The first thing you notice is how many empty water tanks are scattered.
"There you are, Ms. Y/l/n" she appears from the crystal stairs at the end of the room. Wearing a yellow set that made her eyes more bright. Her hair is the same. Looking as evil and cynic as always.
"Dr. Gaul" you greet. Stopping some feet away from her.
"A school new year means new planning ahead" You nod. Already hearing what she was about to say. Well, not entirely.
"The last games were a mess. Between the rebels and Mr. Snow's bright decisions. Our central ideas couldn't be fulfilled. However, I decided to give him another chance, there's so much potential in that boy" You don't know how to feel about that. So you just remain quiet.
"Speaking of the devil…" when you turned back, Snow was walking towards you and the woman near you. Immediately you avoided his eyes, knowing he was probably looking at your dress. The coat was long gone, leaving a soft and accentuating pink dress with long sleeves.
He knew it was inappropriate. But ever since he gained your trust and his feelings of attachment to you, he had a long time to accept he had a thing for your hips. The dress was extremely simple but looked elegant with some bright exotic earrings, and it was your body that created the most attractive shape he'd ever seen.
And soon, his view of you became sided.
"I believe I don't need to remind you of your actions from the last games, Mr. Snow," the woman said.
"It won't happen again." He answered with confidence.
"I know it won't happen again," Gaul says laughing. Making you wonder how much time she had been trying to get into the position she was now.
"This year, let's say you'll be under probation, Mr.Snow. On the other hand, Ms. y/l/n. Another year and another success from you" his eyes were on you again. Turned to his left without shame. And that's when Snow remembered since he came back from District 12 how smart you were. Without saying anything, even avoiding it, you knew he had cheated on the games. And probably, without talking to him anymore, you knew he wasn't a good man.
Only that…slowly, you were also turning into a bad woman.
"Those water creatures are fully developed. They're nothing compared to the snakes from last year. This new invention has marked a new era for us…" To be honest, you don't know how to feel about it. Everything related to the games made you remember your dear friend Sejanus Plinth. He would've hated this creation from you. But on the bright side, this was your future. These were the constant obstacles you would have if you were to achieve success.
"Dr. Gaul. An emergency message has been sent to y/n y/l/n" Immediately you turned confused looking at a new peacekeeper. When you look at your mentor, she nods, indicating to you that you're allowed to leave.
"Excuse me." As you walk away, another peacekeeper has a cable phone. One of the newest wireless ones. Red and shiny, silently beeping. You can hear Snow asking Dr. Gaul something, but the sound of your heels is loud enough to make it difficult to understand as you reach the phone
The peacekeeper hands the cable phone. You pick up, feeling your heart pounding.
"Hello?" The low breathing of your mother can be heard.
"Darling! Something bad happened…"
"What?" You ask. And you don't know but Snow is trying so hard to listen to your conversation.
"Our mines in District 12. Your father made a little trip there with some friends. The people caused a revolt. They bombed the mines." You frown, in shock. Already feeling anger building up in your chest.
"Is pa' okay?" She sighs, which stresses you more.
"Some burns. The peacekeepers saved him on time" Snow listens to Gaul but he literally has an ear on you and the other in the mentor.
"Is it too bad? Like… putting our wealth in danger?" You whisper the last sentence. Your mother is a proud woman. But in the privacy of her family, she allowed herself to be vulnerable.
"I don't know, darling. We still have the mines in District 1. But the ones on the 12 represented greater materials" There's no time to cry and you know it.
So after some soothing words to your mother, you hang up. And you're not thinking clearly. You just know you're angry, and convinced someone had to pay. If you started disliking District 12 after the last games, now it was getting personal.
When you go back to stand beside Snow. You hear Gaul explaining to him how most of the lessons would go. But as soon as she turns back to you, there's an idea that leaves your mouth before you can breathe or blink.
"I was about to say that we should change the arena of the games. Each year it should change, like the seasons. Wasting the opportunity to use the water mutts sounds like a waste of potential for the views. If we still want a spectacle like the one from last year." The woman analyses your words. And after some seconds of silence, she speaks.
At the same time, Snow can't comprehend how poisonous you sound. He knew the call enraged you, it must've been bad.
"Then I'll ask you to find some suggestions for the arena"
"And… I have some ideas for this year Reaping" the woman's evil smile grows. She knows she's turning two young adults into monsters.
"I can't wait till Summer of next year" Gaul giggles, then lets you go, commenting that the next day the actual lessons would begin.
You sigh once she leaves. Finally acknowledging what you just did. Dooming a bunch of kids to fight for their lives with those water monsters. You remember Sejanus. The way he screamed in anger when his tribute was punished for trying to escape.
You're also a monster.
Snow turns to your side, looking as if you have just been cut with something, and he's searching for the wound.
"Are you okay? What happened?" he asks worriedly, caressing your forearm.
"Your beloved district 12. That's what happened." You spit with venom, squirming away from him.
Your harshness takes all over the place as you move away from him.
It's New Year's Day. A bright morning, and you already have your first guest. Clemensia Dovecote.
She still wears turtlenecks. But the gloves are gone. You can't stop smiling after seeing her smile and laugh as she drinks tea on your patio.
"I can't believe it worked, y/n," she says changing the subject. The first dose you gave her was after the games, in late summer. And now, at the peak of winter, Clemensia looked amazing. The cracked and raspy yellowish skin she had, the bright yellow eyes that contrasted her dark brown irises, all of that was mostly gone.
"To be honest, me neither…" you admit smiling proudly. Her skin looked slightly covered in scales, but the texture was soft. Like a snake that shines with a new layer of skin. Her eyes were still a little yellow, but the white was coming back.
"How did you come up with it? The treatment and everything?" you gulp nervously, sipping at your tea. If you opened your mouth, there would be no turning back.
Clemmie knew Snow had cheated, she swore to keep quiet about it. She knew about his exile. But she didn't know everything.
Then you thought you owed nothing to Snow. He owed you a lot, and yet, the way he paid was… cruel.
The only thing you were not in your right to share was about… the boy he killed. And as you'd never know he killed many more, Clemmie wouldn't either.
"He chose her. The songbird" Clemensia's eyes widened, she left the cookie she was about to eat.
"No…" you nod, confirming your words.
"Yes. During the games… he sacrificed everything for her. When I confronted him, he said nothing. After he was exiled, he committed a bribe to ensure his service as a peacekeeper on the 12" you spit with hate. The pride you carried each day, had a big crack thanks to that man, and like broken porcelain, it would never be healed.
"But he only had eyes for you… The Christmas after you arrived here, I asked him out and he said he had eyes on someone else. I can't believe him…" you giggle, rolling your eyes.
"He only had eyes for my money and father's position. He had the chance to win the prize and got obsessed with winning something by himself. The girl was just the cherry on top" You quickly added more as you were about to reveal he was… poor. Not because of him, but for Tigris and her grandmother. Tigris would lose her job and your mother would likely turn her down. So no, you weren't as bad as Snow yet.
"After he left. I realized how much he traced the scar on my face. I simply started hating it. And sooner I dreamed I had it gone. So I thought… Why can't I make something for my dear Clemensia and myself at the same time?" The black haired inspected your face.
"Your scar…" she remembered your face back then. The long pink line across your face. Clemensia did once see Snow caressing your face, his thumb traced the line across your nose until it landed on your lips.
Not it was just a memory as your scar. It was gone. Your face is clean, shiny, and perfect. Too bad that just your face was able to get rid of the touch of Snow.
You can't tell her he asked you to marry him. That was embarrassing enough to say it out loud.
"That's now the boy I knew. He had always been a little cold but… he was good. Now… I just can't stand what he did to you. And while I'll thank you for the rest of my life, you helped with my condition. I will ever feel sorry that you came up with it from such pain" Maybe before the bite, Clemmie was a little narcissistic. And her ambition led her to lie and get bitten. But now, she was all about being thankful and seeking peace everywhere.
"It's okay, Clemmie. Even after all, with Sejanus gone, all of what happened last summer… I'm happy that I have you" she smiles, offering you a big hug.
"Yeah, you won't get rid of me next year" She was officially coming back to class at the University after the winter break was over. Now Snow wouldn't be able to sit next to you.
"I won't mind…" Suddenly your mother comes out from one of the many balconies of your house.
"Girls! The stylist is here!" She lets you and Clemmie know.
This year, the annual New Year's Day will be at your house. The patio where you had breakfast and tea with your friend was already decorated with long tables. Porcelain plates are perfectly accommodated with wine velvet bows decorating them.
Clemensia's father talks with you about the revolt in District 12 and the burns he got. After that… more peacekeepers were sent. And slowly… the whole territory was becoming marginalized.
You ignore it, you only have eyes for the dress writing you on the other side.
When you open the door of your room, there it is.
A golden dress. Shinny and full of sequined beats. With metallic gold puffy fabric resting on your lower half back and ending around your wrists. Bare shoulders style.
You feel bad for not asking Tigris to style you, but she was already busy.
"I... I can't believe this…" you gasp, touching the elegant fabric of the dress. Clemmie can't stop saying how beautiful the dress is.
"With red lipstick and burnt pink eyeshadows… it'll look fantastic," the stylist says to your mother, already visualizing the look.
The patio is full of people. Elegant bonfires make everyone warm. Most of the guests look at your dress as you greet them. The last guests were Tigris and her grandmother, you placed them both in a table full of fashion contacts of your mother.
Clemmie is talking with Festus, Persephone, and other classmates.
Everything goes well until you set your eyes on the garden's entrance and you spot Snow entering.
Your eyebrows immediately frown. The night had been peaceful. And ever since winter break started, you haven't heard of him.
Why did he have to come? Was it for his grandmother?. Doesn't matter, you don't want him in your house.
He spots you and knows you just turned angry. You grab him by the arm and pull him away.
"What are you doing here?" You ask annoyed.
"You invited Tigris and Grandma'am" he shrugs.
"Yes. Tigris and Grandma'am. Not Tigris, Grandma'am, and Coriolanus" For the first time in months, you say his name.
"I have to talk to your father," he admits. You are confused, but he won't say anything yet.
"You look lovely tonight" You ignore the praise in his voice. But he genuinely believes you look astronomically beautiful. Snow was trying to act confident, but deep down he was nervous.
And it worsened when your dad interfered.
"Coriolanus. I'm glad you made it on time. Just an hour away till the countdown" you turn to see your father, offering him a glass of champagne. Neither of you should be drinking yet. But the elite of The Capitol was allowed to break the rules a little.
"No, of course I couldn't. I was just saying how gorgeous y/n looks tonight" your father smiles. You knew your father was believing Snow, that he was a gentleman.
"My one and only child. Perfect as always…" your father answers, putting his arm around your shoulders.
"I would like to discuss something with you. In private…" your heart beats faster.
"Be my guest, boy…" he tells him to enter the party. And as they leave you feel nauseous.
There are twenty minutes left till New Year's Day. Your father hasn't come out with Coriolanus yet. You nervously want to chew your nails. But you do your best for Clemmie. It was her first public appearance since the summer.
You had been trained to satisfy The Capitol's expectations since you were a kid. You knew what you could and couldn't do.
But none had prepared you to hide your shock.
"Dear guests. Family and friends. I would like to give an announcement" Your father appears, the sound of the glass capturing everyone's attention.
"With a new year around the corner, changes are too."
It couldn't…
Snow walked through the tables, towards you.
No, no, no, no.
"It is my pleasure to announce the engagement between Coriolanus Snow and my only daughter, y/n"
You swear you can't breathe.
You don't see Clemmie's face of horror. Tigris is highly confused. Grandma'am at the verge of tears.
"For my darling and her fiancé. Whom I wish eternal luck and happiness" your father finishes the toast.
Snow is beside you, he's not happy either. But he is the first one to start acting for the sudden flashes and cheering.
"How couldn't you tell me you wanted to get married, dear?" Your father asks, being the first person to hug you.
Your shock is so big that you don't even remember smiling for the pictures. You don't remember feeling his hand around your shoulders. You don't remember bursting into the house.
Snow follows you. It's empty, everyone is cheering because the countdown is about to start.
He calls your name. But you don't listen. He follows you through the kitchen and living room.
"WHAT?" You explode before being able to go upstairs.
You see his desperate eyes.
"I didn't know your father was going to announce it that way." He notices your face is red from anger.
"Listen to me, Coriolanus Snow. NO MAN will come and take away the pride of the woman I am." You scream in his face. You won't go quiet like the first time.
"YOU WERE NOTHING!. YOU OWE ME YOUR LUCK!" Snow can only fix his eyes on the sequins of your dress. He had never seen you screaming like that. And nobody would hear anyway.
"If this was your way to make me surrender and get me back. You're so wrong. Because you are going to be in debt with me for the rest of your life. Unless you want a rebel wife like it was your beloved Lucy Gray Baird." His eyes widened at your sudden attack. He has to process every word, every disgusted face you are making. He hadn’t thought about the songbird in many days. Hearing her names sent chills to his spine.
"I wanted this to be different. I had to "You hate him. You can't stand seeing him in his perfect grey suit, his perfect hair and eyes. You really hate him.
"YOU HAD NOTHING!. IF YOU WERE GONNA HUMILIATE ME LIKE THAT, YOU HAD TO GET ON YOUR KNEES AND BEG TO MARRY ME!" Whisking away, he grabs your hand, and when you turn, you find him on his knees.
"Please…" you feel he placed the ring in your hand. And it's too much.
You slap him. And then run away to your room.
As you lock the door, you throw the ring. And when tears start streaming down like a waterfall, you hear the first fireworks.
There's a bottle of pills in your vanity. The treatment for your low mood. You only need it once in a day. But you take two hoping it would knock you out and make you forget about the night.
It's officially a new year.
Three weeks later, Lucky Flickerman is interviewing you and Snow in his late-night show. You can't stand how Snow is caressing your hand. The way he slightly giggles and smiles at you, whenever there is a silly question.
You only do this because nobody knows the truth. Just Clemensia and Tigris.
"Sources tell us that it'll be a spring wedding. Is that right, y/n?" The man asks. You sigh, smiling.
'We're not sure yet, Lucky. There are so many details. Especially with my dress. But my man here is patiently waiting" the interviewer laughs, throwing a sarcastic comment about the dress.
"And what about kids? Is a baby on the plans?" Immediately, both of you blush.
"Yes. We want to have kids one day" Snow hurries to answer. You want to laugh.
He would be a terrible father. Some days ago, he was at your house for a family gathering and while he liked seeing you with your baby cousins, he knew he wasn't good with them. He didn't know how to play or make them laugh. But he had to make everyone believe he was a man of family and marriage. Even when both of you were still nineteen.
"Oh. Well, you're still young. There's plenty of time, pair of lovebirds" You make the strength to turn and smile at Snow. He returns you the smile.
And he wants to believe it's an honest reaction from you. He really hates that everything happened this way. He wanted to wait personally and privately ask you to marry him again. Not like this.
"Y/n… How did you know Coriolanus was the one?" It takes you aback. You can't lie. There's a truth.
"When I met him, he made me feel comfortable. He was so sweet and he trusted me. He made it hard for me not to love him. He has these gorgeous ocean eyes, that every time I see him I get lost in them. It reminds me of the kind boy I met some time ago…" Everyone feels emotional. Coriolanus is aware of the real meaning behind your words, and he can't help but honestly smile. He knows he realized it, but he couldn't bring himself to admit it.
"These ladies and gentlemen… is a couple in love!" Lucky laughs and points at you and Snow excited. And he says that he'll be back with the broadcast for the weather, he thanks you and your fiancé for being there.
"Take care, guys. Don't forget to invite me to the wedding!, I'll get some people inside to bring the news anyways…"
And finally, both of you are behind the set. You don't even glance at Snow. But he hurries to stop you, interfering in your way.
"I'm sorry. For everything…" you cross your arms.
"No. You hate me. That's why you keep doing this to me…"
Your assistant appears handing you a glass of water and a little plate of something Snow can't see.
"Here's some water and your antidepressants, miss" You blush and ignore the way your fiancé is looking.
As you walk away, Coriolanus only feels worse.
You stare at the public library. Now closed just for your wedding happening in a couple of hours.
There are white roses everywhere. Petition of your mother to commemorate Snow and his family. You hated it.
It ended up being a spring wedding. But a very cold one. By early June, summer would start. And for now, snowflakes still fell upon The Capitol.
"The dress is ready…" Tigris says, appearing on your side. She sees how you stare at the whole place with dismay.
"How could this happen?" She asks, wondering.
"My younger self would've loved this day. But now… is different" You didn't want to insult her cousin.
"His younger self would've also loved this" Tigris remembered how enchanted was Coriolanus for you. Saying that he made a rich friend who was so sweet. Soon he admitted you were gorgeous and delicate. Now forgetting to mention you only when Grandma'am asked.
"He's trying to get you back," Tigris adds. And you question it.
Ever since the engagement. He always reached for you. Asking how you were. The kisses on the cheek to greet you. Felt honest. But you doubted you would ever forgive him. Even if you ended up having his children someday…
"I know it won't change anything. But I'm sorry. You didn't deserve this…" the young woman lamented. After you confessed most of the things Snow did to you, she added that to her list. And slowly, Tigris had slightly brushed aside her cousin.
"I didn't. But what's pissing me off is the wedding night" Tigris coughed awkwardly. And you rolled your eyes.
"No, Tigris. It's not about the sex. It's about me having to leave my house forever. I refuse…" She relaxed.
Honestly, you hadn't thought about sex. You knew it would happen anytime after marrying. But you wouldn't give Snow the satisfaction to even give hints.
At least, your father suggested Snow temporarily move in with you in your room since his new penthouse would be only for Tigris and grandmother. He would sleep in your tub.
"It's a great place for a honeymoon. Capitol's north is full of mountains, fancy restaurants, and actual snow" Somehow, you laugh.
"Fitting for my new legal name" Tigris joins you and laughs, hugging you tightly.
You stare at the flowers, and the hundreds of seats, and you aren't ready. But there's a smile on your face. Because at that point you don't even care.
Coriolanus was alone. He thinks Sejanus could've been there. Annoying and smiley as always, but he would've been the best man. Chosen by him because there wasn't another option. But it's only him. Staring at his mother's ring.
Pure gold, a medium size rectangle-shaped diamond. Shining ridiculously in white and small rainbows.
You look just like your father on his wedding day.
Your mother was so happy. Spinning and laughing as your father danced with her.
Remember. As you take a wife, you are choosing a life partner. You have to remember every morning why you chose her. You have to respect and protect her. Give her a home, a warm place to grow old together.
Y/n is the perfect woman for you. She's so lucky to have you, my boy.
All of those things, Grandma'am had said to him as she handed the ring.
And now sitting alone in a room. Suit ready, in black, and very little gold details in the white shirt under. Tigris said it was going to match your dress.
Your father actually loved your mother, Coriolanus. Treat her right. That is the least you could do…
She knew. Tigris had to know everything.
Coriolanus wondered how you would look. A princess-style dress? Maybe velvet? And he imagined your face.
That's when he can't take it anymore. He cries. Because everything was going to be a lie. He cries because it could've been true. If only he had made better decisions. If only you weren't so smart that you discovered him.
He's a broken man.
But he grips the ring on his palm. Wiping the tears and deciding that he's never going to fail you again. As he knew you had never failed him. And even when you hated him, neither you would.
There are three mirrors. Your hands trace the shiny beats of your dress. From the strips to your breasts, to your waist and hips. The end was full of them. Combining gold, and even dark brown or grey. It was simple, slightly sheer. But extremely elegant. Made with crystals from your family's mines. Representative of your native District 1. Your hair is down, perfectly cut in that shag haircut you had when you were a teen. It fits perfectly with your veil. Also covered in tiny pieces of crystals that cover your head, to the tail of the dress.
You looked like a Capitol's bride.
And for some reason, you can't find the tears. It's just you staring at the mirrors. Accepting your doomed life.
As you open the door, you know there are already tears on everyone but you.
Clemensia, Persephone, your mother, and Tigris sob and look at you in shock.
"Oh my god, my baby. You look perfect!" Your mother cries, caressing your cheeks and sobbing. You smile at her, just that.
They keep talking about the dress when you hear a knock followed by the door of the room opening.
"Is there any time for this old woman to see the bride?" Tigris smiles at her grandmother, inviting her to join.
"There's only ten minutes left. Everyone hurry!" Your mother says. They exaggerate, only Tigris gives you one last retouch, and hands you the bouquet. With white roses and some lilies scattered.
She kisses your cheek and smiles deeply.
"It's gonna be fine. I swear…" and with that, she leaves.
Grandma'am only looks at you with love. She always liked you for his grandson. And she believed love floated around you two. For the record, she said it two weeks ago in a rehearsal you had.
"I knew it from the first day my little Coriolanus came home rambling about you" she smiles.
"And from that day, it always had been you, my dear. Even today… always saying you are the love of his life" Your eyes water. Coriolanus wouldn't lie to his grandma about something like that. He could lie about killing someone but not about something he knew would make her happy.
"He did?" You ask as she takes your hand.
"Of course. I know I'm old, and I can't tell he has committed some errors. But I know those blue always are so in love with you, my child" That couldn't be.
"Do you love him?" You won't cry. But you're fighting the lump in your throat.
"I do. Ever since the first day…" you admit.
Maybe you would always resent the man you were going to marry. But you would always love the memory of the boy you once had.
"Promise me you will make him happy, dear. He has so little when we lost everything once. Take care of him. Give him a family, that's all I ask" You can't say no to her. You just can't.
"I promise." She hugs you. And you swallow the lump, looking at the door.
The moment had arrived. The doors opened, the music started and everyone turned back to see you entering by the hand of your father.
Sounds of shock, admiring, and more are very low but noticeable.
For Coriolanus, it's only you. Your hair was like when you met him. The dress is so perfect. Your makeup too. And he promises to keep the image of you in his mind for the rest of his life.
He genuinely smiles. And you are feeling so confused. Could his grandmother have been telling the truth?
Coriolanus actually loved you? The way he had been smiling and treating you for the past months. Had he really been feeling sorry?
Would you forgive him if that was the case?
You can't tell because your father has dropped you at the altar.
You didn't even feel his kiss on the head and promised good luck.
You just feel Snow taking your hand. It's warm, even soft for his calloused hands.
And you can't turn to see him.
There are many people taking pictures of you and him.
Everyone loved the Capitol's Dream Girl and her handsome wealthy fiancé ever since the engagement.
When you last expected it, you are officially Mrs. Snow.
"You may kiss the bride…" you know he's doubting. But there's no time, so you stand on your tiptoes to kiss him.
It takes him aback, but soon, his hands find that damn spot, in your hips. And it doesn't feel wrong, for some reason.
You just see him and you realize he's your man now.
Neither of you can understand the emotions flowing at the moment. You like seeing him smiling at you like that, but you also feel sad. And he loves the way you look, he feels so attached to you.
In other words, both feel like it was real. But both knew the truth.
You don't dare to eye any of your family or friends as you leave by the hand of your now husband.
The reception was just as big as the ceremony. With the most elegant music, food of all kinds, and a varied menu.
Your husband has chosen to give the option of fish florentine, mentioning to you that his uncle used to get the best food from District 4 before the war.
For you, it was fried steak with three types of cheese and coated with mushroom cream.
There's a picture for everyone. You and Snow enter the party. Your father says a little speech about how much of a great marriage you would have.
You dance with your baby cousins. Lucky Flickerman was able to ask about your dress and possible honeymoon location.
You ignore your husband for the rest of the night. Only when the cake has to be sliced. It's a 5 layer cake, covered in white and very little baby pink roses. Snow and you agreed to make it white chocolate with raspberries and cream.
He cleans some cream from your cheek, and before you can even think about it, you laugh.
He danced with you but you only decided to hear his heartbeats, instead of seeing him. It made you understand that lonely days were over. But at what cost?
That night, you are already seeing the mountains and green woods covered in white at the top. You sigh, looking at the metallic silk nightgown. You didn't want the traditional white or pink silk gown. This was short, offered some cleavage, it shined in orange and pink tones when it was supposed to be lavender.
During the whole hour trip to the residence of the honeymoon, you didn't say anything to him.
When you come out of the bathroom, he's sitting at the edge of the bed. A dark grey robe on him and you wonder if he was naked too.
Ignoring him, you go to the giant vanity in front of the bed.
You try to focus on the plenty of assignments you'll have after the honeymoon. With less than three months before the next games, your water mutts had already killed a person. Gaul only laughed and insisted on you to feed the beasts with the corpse.
Little did everyone know that on the Reaping day, District 12 people would receive a tiny stain of liquid Mercury on their ballot. Within months of inhaling that thing, they would be sick. It was your revenge for the revolt in the mines that almost killed your father.
But for now, you can only feel his eyes on you. Like the first day of school. You know he wants to touch you. He wants to claim you as his wife. But he doesn't have the right.
So he stays seated, hoping you will make the first move.
Ignoring the way your heart beats, wanting to feel something. Your heart was blind, thinking you could make love with Coriolanus.
Once you have finished with your facial cream. You turn off the light. Only the balcony offered some glimpses.
You step between his legs, hands on his shoulders. The smell of tobacco leaf and vanilla bean perfume hits him, making him gulp. Unsure whether to touch you or not.
"Wait, y/n… Are you-… Are you sure?" He asks, unsure of what is happening. He kind of thanked you for turning off the lights. That way you couldn't see how blushed he was. After all, this was going to be his first time. After actual years of desiring you, he gets to have you for the rest of his life.
Then you lean, inches away from his lips.
" I don't want to hear you" and you don't say more, neither does he. In the darkness, he finds your lips and there's plenty of time to kiss you slowly. With wet sounds, your hands fly to his hair. Making him moan for the first time. It shouldn't be turning you on. But it is, so you slightly move your head, and maybe he understood, 'cause he started kissing your jaw, soon your neck.
He feels you pulling out the nightgown, and it's making him so fucking hard.
You kiss him again and he's free to wander across your naked body. Now his…
It's his first time, just like it is yours. So when he tries to touch you past your lower belly, you guide him.
Softly making him slide his fingers across your wet folds. You moan and he thinks it's the most erotic thing he's ever heard in his life. He knows you are skilled even when it's also your first time. He knows because of your timing, the way you swayed your hips any time you walked, and the way you balanced touching him and moaning at the same time.
Before you, he rarely touched himself or thought about sex. But soon after kissing you for the first time, he would hate himself for thinking how you would look underneath the Academy uniform.
And now, there you were, naked, taking his virginity as you slowly rode him. You swear he has to be big enough to be able to feel him and his details inside you. The pacing was so soft yet hard. Soft because of your slick, hard because of the pleasure.
All you could hear was his sighs, but the stars of the night were your moans and little yelps for him. No words exchanged, just the sound of your desire and his response.
And when you start going faster, holding onto him as if your life depended on it, he was over the edge to say it. But he couldn't.
Your first time should've been with him on top. Tigris said it was traditional. But he let you take the lead, and it was turning out better. You even let him paint your walls with his cum. You let him kiss and suck your nipples as he felt the last spasms of his climax, prolonged by the way you squeezed him.
Even with the silence, both of you knew. It was the hardest and best orgasm of your life.
At the outsides of The Capitol, there's an office. All University students needed to submit their petition to graduate two years prior to the ceremony. Gaul demanded you and Snow to go as soon as you returned from the honeymoon.
Now, two months married, you feel slightly lighter. You talked a little bit more with him. Breakfasts were quiet but peaceful. At the University he always tried to protect you.
The news was all about the wedding. Saying it was the event that officially marked the end of the war. People loved you and encouraged your husband to pursue a political party to start campaigns, hoping to win the presidency. As for you, rumors had spread that you were going to be the next game maker of Panem. Evenings were to study and go for some walks. And most of the nights you repeated the same formula. Ending up tangled in your bed with the darkness reigning.
You couldn't help but wonder if something had changed.
Coriolanus Snow was still cold, serious, a man of few but harsh words. But to you, he seemed warm. Like if fucking him had made him switch and now he was eating out from the palm of your hand.
Still, you still felt like the past was haunting you. With memories of the last games and the moment you lost your lovely blonde guy.
"It's done," Snow says coming out of a private office. The green tiles stop being attractive to your eye, making you blink twice to stare at your husband.
He's yours, just like you wanted. With his perfect eyes, perfect smile, hair, body, and dream life.
You sigh with relief. He had insisted on submitting both papers to soothe you from stress.
"We are likely to receive a letter next year. The woman said it was basically approved for us…" you nod. He offers you a sweet smile, that you can't help but reply.
He offers you his arm to take, ready to leave the office.
Lately, Coriolanus has been worried for you. The antidepressant treatment was over, but you were under pressure because you had created the arena and strategies for the 11th Hunger Games. People debated your capacity and ideals. And he knew that would stress you.
He was patiently trying to make you feel comfortable on his side. To make you feel again like you said in the interview with Flickerman.
"Thank you." You say to him.
"Of course."
After taking the elevator, you two are ready to walk out. Until there's a loud explosion near. You exchange looks with your husband, and as he squeezes your hand tighter, what feels like another explosion makes you and Snow fly away.
When he opens his eyes, the building is literally on fire. He reacts quickly, realizing there has been another bombing.
He's okay, just his neck hurts, but there's no blood. It's you who's worrying him a lot.
He calls your name but you don't respond.
Through the ashes and hazes of dust, he looks out for you.
A few feet away, you are coughing, lying on the ground.
He runs and kneels beside you.
"Y/n, please. Can you hear me?" You nod slowly, barely moving.
"I-can't breathe…" Snow sees how your nose bleeds and there are some glasses making your arm shake a little. The sleeve of your cardigan is drenched in blood.
He panics and goes into a full panic attack. Not even when he was in the arena and got hurt. He truly feared losing you.
"I'm taking you out of here" he looks around and notices there's no one around.
He carries you, doing his best to run out of the increasing fire.
"I don't want to die, Coriolanus" you gasp, trying to breathe. He looks down at you, now looking at the dirt in your face.
"You won't die, love. Just calm down and breathe" In fact he knows you could die. But he refuses to accept it as he finds the exit of the building.
There's chaos on the streets.
And in the middle of the disaster, he starts asking for help.
"Please… I need an ambulance for my wife!" He pleads to some people who seem to be helping a group of kids.
A woman listens and calls for a man.
"Help is coming, y/n. Do not close your eyes" The rush in him impeded him from crying. Because he was so freaked out.
"Mr. Snow, I'm a doctor. I'll help your wife get into a hospital" A middle-aged man gets closer, inspecting your face. You can't hear anything. Your eyes close by themselves, and you still feel so out of breath.
It's the sound of the ambulance that works as a lullaby and makes you pass out.
It's uncertain. But reliable sources said it was a direct target from rebel allies, a direct target to you. Because the next game maker needed to be erased from Panem before she could even start. Snow is shockingly angered. And he adds another point to his hate for rebellion.
"I won't quit." You affirm from the hospital bed. Your mother frowns.
"I don't think you're understanding the seriousness of this situation, y/n" she suggests, to which your father also nods.
The door opens and Coriolanus enters, hurried to inspect you.
"Are you Okay? The doctor said it wasn't that bad but-" you smile, caressing his shoulder.
"I'm fine. Just inhaled too much smoke. And my arm, but that's it" You show him your left arm covered in gazes.
He kisses your forehead.
"I was so afraid," he whispers in your ear.
And maybe it was all about your emotions after the shocking day. But you finally feel it. You love him. And the way he had acted since the engagement made you believe he could possibly feel the same. But you aren't sure.
"I won't quit. That would only give the rebels a point. I will make this games memorable. And nobody in Panem will ever question my methods" Your words shouldn't have made your husband proud. But it does.
"You're so right, dear," he says, making you smile nervously.
You are allowed to leave the hospital that night. And the whole ride, you have to fight the tears. You can't take it anymore.
As soon as you get inside your room. Coriolanus starts running the tub to clean you up.
You get on your knees. Your throat already feels as if you were choking. He spots you on your carpet, looking so vague and lost.
"Please, Coriolanus." He's watching you carefully. And by your face, he feels you are about to say something from the bottom of your heart.
"What? Are you in pain?" He asks scared, kneeling in front of you. You don't answer and that terrifies him. Until you do.
"Tell me you are in love with me. Just once, doesn't matter if you never say it again for the rest of my life. If you mean it, say you love me." Tears start flowing, your face turns red, and Coriolanus can't help but feel vulnerable by seeing like that.
"Because if you say you only insisted on marrying me because of the money, and my father's position… I'm gonna hate you till the day I die. For all you did to me and everything that could've been" he has to close his eyes. To not see you as a tear falls without a warning from his left eye. He has to decide. Is he going to break his promise? He said he couldn't love anyone again. But you weren't new. You were the first. She was the last.
Coriolanus wished to be your boyfriend soon after meeting you. And from waiting for the right moment to ask, he ended up ruining everything for his ambition. From believing she was different, that she was worth it. Ignoring all the pain he caused to you.
And until that moment he realized he had almost obligated you to marry him.
He already had what he wanted. The money and his power were growing, and he had the girl.
Crying on her knees in front of him. Asking him to end her pain. Just by loving her after all the pain he caused her.
Slowly, he reaches for your face. Your sobs became almost silent. Your heart was beating so fast. And if Coriolanus didn't speak now, you would end up having a second mental breakdown.
But he caressed your cheeks. And he traced your face. Where your scar should've been. New waves of tears fall as you feel what he's doing. Only making shut your eyes harder.
"Look at me, y/n" you can't. You're not ready to hear him saying he used you once again.
"I can't." You whisper, sobbing. He decided then to grab you by the waist. Being so gentle, made you feel like two years ago when he was still your lover.
He placed you carefully on the bed. Making you hide your face against the pillows, ruining the white satin with your makeup.
He doesn't care. He just wants to be honest. Real. He's still young. Coriolanus knows he can't live the rest of his life married to you, making you believe he never loved you.
Only you would be able to see who he really was. Even if he ended up having children with you someday. He would never love them like you.
He could be cold and his decisions would be considered cruel. But the only person on earth that would judge him was going to be you.
"Please look at me, y/n" he caresses your cheek, smiling softly. Slowly, you sit, facing him finally.
You can see your old and sweet Coriolanus with the smile he's giving you. And it only makes you cry and cry again.
"I love you."
You stop. Hiccuping, you look perplexed at him.
He's still smiling.
You know he killed two people, probably three.
You'd never know he sent Sejanus to be hanged.
You know he's not the best person.
You'd never know he had a letter he was going to send to you before going to District 12.
You know he caused you so much pain.
And yet you thought you'd never hear him saying those three words.
"I made you suffer. I ruined everything. You know what I did just by looking at my eyes. How can we love each other after all?" You shrug. Trying to control yourself and answer him properly.
"Maybe because we never got the chance to make it real." He chuckles, taking your hand.
"You know I also did cruel things this year." He nodded, having no right to judge you. He wondered if you did all of that from rage, for everything that happened.
"And I still believe you deserve the world, Capitol's dream girl…" he makes you laugh. Out of embarrassment from the silly nickname Flickerman gave you.
"My father was a bad man, and yet, he always treated my mom right. I can't promise I'll be perfect, but I will never hurt you again" You brush his hair. Dishevelling it in the process, making him look like a year ago.
"Promise me. Just you and I, getting each other's back" he says. And you know you'll go to hell for being with him. But he was the love of your life.
"Just you and I, my love" he smiles again.
"I'll make you First Lady of Panem one day. It'll fit better for your current nickname" you roll your eyes.
"What will we do with that much power?" He stares deeply into your eyes. You changed his hair, and he hoped he could still see the scar on your face. But it was gone. Just like the girl he met two years ago. So was the boy he was. But it was okay. Because he'd make you be like him. And nothing would matter more than you and him.
"Everything, dear" you smile. And feeling like teenagers again, both lean at the same time to kiss. Like it was the first time.
"Can I?…" he asks on your lips. You nod, hugging from his neck.
He kisses you finally. Soft, slow but demanding.
And you remember you made it. Your husband would have the power, but you just won control.
And for the next two weeks, during summer break, Coriolanus and you spent your days in District 1. Spending the days eating in the best restaurants, visiting museums, and swimming in private pools. Spending the nights exploring each other for the first time. He marked you his and you marked him yours. Watching the moon and forgetting about the university, moving into a new house, letting the past die.
Maybe the memory of Lucy Gray Baird would haunt Coriolanus for the rest of his life, but you were going to be there to turn it into haze. And maybe you would never forget the pain of losing thanks to him, but he would paint your days golden. He would be a good husband who would make it up each day.
The first day of your second year of University started differently. Coriolanus refused to learn to drive and refused to let you do it. But you convinced him it was okay.
You left home together. And arrived together on campus. Went through the stairs holding hands.
"Look, it's The Capitol's trendiest couple" Persephone, an old classmate from the Academy but also a new friend said. Festus, Clemmie, and other new friends were there, laughing and making fun of you and Coriolanus.
And you blushed. Abruptly stopping your steps. Your husband turned to see you.
"Everything is fine?" You nod, smiling.
"I just… This is exactly how I wanted to begin University last year" It made his heart clench.
"Only… he's missing it" Like a needle taking him aback, Coriolanus knew what you meant.
"He'd hate what we have become though" It's bad, but you laugh.
"You're right, dear" you agree with your husband.
"But happy for us…" he adds, and you nod. Grabbing his arm to finally enter the building.
Soon, two peacekeepers call you to Gaul's office, just like last year. She's not there. But there's a letter on her desk.
You exchange looks with Coriolanus. He tilts his head and follows you to the desk. Carefully, he grabs the envelope and opens it.
Students, as the summer ends, I hope you had a pleasant summer.
Congratulations on your success after the games, Mr and Mrs. Snow.
Given the circumstances of Dean Highbottom's death last year, I won't be able to begin with the preparation for the 12th Hunger Games.
I believe you two have gained enough knowledge to start without me.
You'll find materials in the backroom of my principal laboratory. You'll find it quite interesting.
Make me proud and you two will be the first and automatic option to replace me in a couple of years.
And keep in mind what I always ask. What are the games for?
Dr. Volumnia Gaul
No words are exchanged after reading the letter. Coriolanus only nods to you, agreeing to the message.
So you go to the principal laboratory. It's clean and the sound of different animals is the only sound inside.
There are two long tables, and it's obvious, that there are at least six corpses covered in white blankets.
When you pull away the blanket, you gasp in shock.
The corpses that were once humans now seemed a mix of animals.
Until you see what it is.
"Coryo. These are the corpses of the death tributes" You are shocked. He was also surprised.
"The mutt bite… transformed them?" Slowly, you nod. He hands you some gloves and a face mask
"Every year I end up creating something more vile" you admit touching the slimy skin of the corpses, turning dark and the human face blemished. Only a girl from District 4 had won Mags. A lot of people loved her. But the cheer wasn't very loud, thank you and your marriage.
"These were also the people who probably agreed on the bombs. They hate us, y/n" he's right.
"They need a yearly reminder that war is over. That we won and that you won't give up" You turn to face him. There's the anger and hate you disliked about him. But now you have plenty of reasons to agree with him.
"They deserve this."
"You're right"
He sees you making some tests to study the altered DNA and smiles. He was so fucked up.
"Don't stare, silly. Come here and help me. There's a lot to do" you say playfully. So he smirks mockingly and starts helping you.
"Maybe we could have some resting after this" he suggests, you laugh.
"Here? With deformed corpses? I don't think so, dear"
"Not here. We can go to the private ladies' room." Sometimes you made fun of him for having the kind of a pervert teenager. Ever since you decided to make up with him, Coriolanus and you were the biggest switching couple in the history of sex.
"Oh, my goodness. Can you behave for once, Mr. Snow?" You ignore him, sealing some glass containers with pieces of skin, fluids, and more from the corpses.
"You know what? Forget it. We haven't done it in the upper living room, or the library. Yeah, I can wait." Brushing past him, you laugh.
"I swear I will turn you into a mutt if you don't shut up, Coryo" both of you laugh. And Coriolanus feels happy. He thinks he has your back. He finally won.
He won the money, the fame, and the power was growing. And he won the girl.
It was already dark when you were done doing the practices at the University. Coriolanus helps you with your coat and bag as you make your way to the car.
"After you, dear" he indicates that you should sit first. So you do, and after you start the car, you turn to see him.
He has rebellious hair hanging on his forehead. He lets you brush his hair and smiles, relaxing after a long day.
There's time to catch your lips and kiss you deeply. Hands on your hips as usual and yours tangled in his hair. Even after brushing it.
"Do you think she'll notice?" He asks agitated, breathing unevenly. You giggle, fixing your dark purple lipstick through the mirror of the car.
"She gave us six bodies, but seven doesn't make much difference. Right?" He smiles too, even giggling a bit.
"I can't wait to take a shower," he admits.
"I can't wait for you to take me to bed after shower" Before you make it outside of campus, he kisses you again, squeezing your inner thigh, almost making you moan.
"Me neither…"
___________________________
Taglist: @sarnbarnes @user0440822 @poppyflower-22 @h-l-vlovesvintage @zxrcle @gloryekaterina @dakotali @especiallythewomenandthechildren @mymadokamagica @drvnkn-dazed
In my head… this was the wedding dress<3
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anticipatecrime · 9 months
Text
𝙞 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙠𝙞𝙨𝙨 𝙠𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙮𝙤𝙪 | colby brock & sam golbach x fem reader
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summary: slight enemies to lovers trope, sam/colby, and you are from kansas, and make haunted content, only difference is they blew up months before you did. you and the guys have a rocky relationship, jokingly but also not jokingly hating eachother. what happens when you both plan to film at the stanley on the same day. | a/n: hey guys, uh warning for like the beginning of smut(?) also please call me out on spelling mistakes!! also don't be shy to request jake words: 12k
"hey guys, welcome back to another video! if you saw my recent tweets, you'll know that our next series is going to be based around the stanley hotel, one of the most haunted areas in the us." you introduced the video idea. "and to make it even more special, we're going to be joined by three very special guests that you may recognize."
you pan the camera towards your three best friends. "vera, milo andd finn!"
"hi guys!" vera smiles, waving to the camera, adjusting her backpack on her shoulder. her light brown hair blowing in the slight wind.
"hey whats up." milo says, putting his hand to his mouth and biting his lip, making his brother roll his eyes.
"nobody likes that." finn murmurs seriously, before chuckling. "hi fans! i've missed you guys." he makes a heart with his hands.
"cringe alerttt." milo snickers, making fun of him.
"okay, okay calm down guys, i need to explain to them what's going to happen today." you stated, setting down the camera onto a tripod, before sitting down yourself on a bench outside of target. "come sit down, i want to get a cool shot."
one by one they sit down on the bench with you, everyone squished so they could be in frame. "okay, so! i'm hoping to film the entire trip so i have a series worth of content for you guys. and i was thinking on how we should get to the stanley, like by plane or something but then i had a thought.. what if.. we did.. a roadtrip!" you announce to not just the viewers but also your friends.
"what." milo gave a disapointed look. "how long are we going to be in colorado?"
"i was thinking that we start driving there tonight, it's kinda a long drive so we'll get to colorado around 11am, and we can like chill out until we check in at stanley around 5, explore the most haunted areas, and then we can sleep for a bit and then wake up at 3am." you explain, earning a nod from the group.
"i'm thinking we only stay there overnight and then we leave in the morning around 10 or so, another 17 hours back, makes it just like two days and a half i think." you say, overexplaining the time, to make sure nobody was busy.
"what day is it today?" vera asks, looking to the two boys.
"wednesday." finn answers, giving a smile to the girl, earning a smile back.
"wait wednesday? shit i don't think i can go y/n, i have a modeling thing on sunday." milo shrugs.
"you'll be back saturday morning, though." you say, raising an eyebrow, and crossing your arms.
"i need my beauty sleep, this trip sounds exhausting, i can't come back, having a shoot with eyebags." he says, earning a scoff from finn.
"whattt." vera pouts at him. "but the ghost squad won't be the same without you! the viewers will be so upset at you."
"yeah! milo we need you to come with us, you always make for good content." you say, before giggling.
he pauses for a moment, thinking about his schedule before looking to vera. the two had a weird relationship, something along the lines of friends with benefits.
finally, he shrugs. "i guess i'll go, but i need to be back that morning, i need time to recharge." he says.
"awesome!" you smile, jumping out of your seat on the bench. you glance at finns watch. "okay so it's about 4, we need to leave around 6. so i'm thinking we get loads of snacks and some ghost type stuff here at target, get to the apartment and then we can pack like anything we need."
"fuck yeah." finn nods. "i'm down for snacks." he laughs as you jokingly pass your credit card to him.
"since i'm dragging you guys out here, the snacks and stuff is all on me so don't worry about paying."
"yoo really?" finn actually snatches your card this time, laughing mischievously.
"are drinks on you too?" vera asks, with a smug smile. "i could use some vod- i mean water." she looks into the camera directly as she corrects herself. she coughs. "water, yes water."
"i fucking love water." milo laughs, wrapping an arm around vera, making her blush.
you clear your throat, before looking to finn, and pulling him along into target. "lets go guys! we don't have much time."
the four of you grab a cart, trying to keep the camera down so an employee doesn't see and kick you out. vera suggests you getting into the cart, so you do and suddenly shes pushing you down aisles at rapid speed.
you scream at the movements. "vera! be careful!" you laugh, the boys chasing you two down.
"how will we get snacks if you two are fooling around with your shenanigans." finn comments, trying not to burst out into laughter.
"okayy, fineee." vera stops the cart, making it jolt.
"so, what snacks should we get?" you ask from inside the cart, looking at the chip selection.
"oo definitely doritos." milo reaches for them, throwing them in.
"i want ms vickies." you say, grabbing two kinds, both your favourite, and finn's.
"hmm i don't know what i want, i'm more craving licorice." she walks away into the direction of the candy aisle.
"she left us!!" you pout, encouraging finn to push the cart slowly.
as you three make it to the other aisle, you see vera with her hands full of candy. licorice, m&ms, gummy bears, popcorn and some chocolate.
"yes the m&ms!" you shout, making grabby hands towards the small package.
"i know you so well." vera snickers, chucking not one but two packages directly at you. "score!!"
"do we need any other snacks?" you wonder aloud, looking back to the guys.
"i could use a drink." milo comments, shrugging.
"to the drinks!"
everyone goes completely different in their choice of drink. you watch as finn reaches for two monster cans, vera on her tippy toes trying to grab a bottle of fresca, and milo looking at coconut milk. you scoff and roll your eyes at that.
finn notices the look and shuffles over to you, whispering behind his hand. "he's so lame."
you try not to laugh, as he's a few meters away. "i agree. i don't know what vera sees in him." you mutter back, knowing that finn has been in love with her since preschool.
you had all gone to the small school, finn meeting vera, and milo meeting you in kindergarten. because of classes you didn't really know finn until he was at vera's 6th birthday party.
and ever since you three had been the best of friends. with milo he was slightly different. it was like he was popular since the womb. he came out and immediately was the cooler sibling. it took a few more years for him to be apart of the group, only really joining because vera had a huge crush on him.
it was a weird love triangle. them being brothers and all. it was obvious milo didn't have feelings for her but he couldn't not play into it.
"i'm being serious, i can't believe she's still all over him." you say. "he treats her horribly. you really should confess." you encourage him.
"dude, i'm not ruining our 18 year long friendship just because of my dumb feelings." he sighs disappointingly.
"atleast consider it. you're perfect for her!"
"perfect for who?" both you and finn become still, eyes wide turning to the girl standing infront of them.
"perfect for selena gomez." you blurt, before whispering into her direction. "his celebrity crush." you shrug, trying to hide what was actually happening.
finn rolls his eyes, annoyed. "yeah."
"oh cool. she's hot i guess." she turns away and walks back towards milo, attempting to look over his shoulder.
"close one." you mumble.
"don't talk about this stuff around her, i can't risk her finding out." he pleads, embarrassed of the situation.
"yes, of course, sorry about that." you rub the back of your neck awkwardly before getting a drink too.
about 20 minutes later, and you're leaving target, still in the cart, packed tightly around the bags. you click the button on your key, the trunk popping out. the guys begin to pack away the bags in there, before vera takes you on one last run with the cart.
"wooooo!" you smile, feeling the cold wind hit you at your fast past. you're going so quick that you can only just make out the figures of the guys, finn with his camera out, taking a few pictures of the two of you.
after the shenanigans were over, you were driving the car back to the apartment you, vera and finn shared. you remember when vera begged you two to let milo move in as if there was room.
the apartment was bigger than an average one, but for four people, it would suck and be cramped with eachothers things.
and it wasn't like you couldn't afford a real place, because you could. your youtube channel was absolutely blowing up. you were about halfway to three million subscribers, around the same amount as your social media arch nemesis, sam and colby.
your channel and theirs have always been really close, them having no more then 10k subscribers then you at a time. it's been noticed by many fans, and earlier this year it became a competition. both yours and their fanbases have almost gone against eachother, starting a rivalry.
it was such a serious thing to their fans that they would leave hate comments on most of your videos. you tried not to let it get to you, and you made sure to only take them as jokes.
you honestly felt a bit betrayed by sam and colby as a creator. you thought they would've spoken up about the real threats, but they chose to leave it unnoticed, leave their fans spewing hate.
infact one time they even made a passive aggressive dig towards you in their haunted series a few months ago. colby said something along the lines of how they would always be better and he made a joke about sexism, that womens youtube content could never be as good as a mans. he clearly said it was a joke, but who jokes about that stuff?
and that's when you really declared war. if they wanted to be assholes, they would get treated as such. you ended up blocking him on instagram so you’d stop getting tagged in stuff with him.
you sighed, walking through the door behind everyone else, going to your room to pack a few clothing items. you turned the camera back on, setting it on the side table. "hey guys, just an update, we are now each packing our bags, and hopefully we will leave within the hour! hmm i think i'm gonna post the picture finn took in the parking lot for you guys."
you go onto your phone and post a picture on instagram. this was something you would do often to interact with fans.
you would post a picture while filming, and reply to a few comments on the video.
@y/nslittleworld
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Liked by verakeys, finnsphotography, tarayummy and 310k others. y/nslittleworld: this is how we're getting to colorado, by cart view all 4,381 comments.. verakeys: when i was pushing you inside the store i was so scared of an employee 😭 finnsphotography: pretty tarayummy: you guys r so hot!! brennen: pls answer my dms | y/nslittleworld: brennen for the last time i won’t be your girlfriend
y/nsbiggestfan12: she posted!!, new lock screen check! | y/nslittleworld: you’re adorable <3 i love my fans
team_y/n776: team y/n! she's so pretty!! | team_colby_brock: no she's not 💀she looks basic view 109 comments..
you giggled at your comment to brennen. it's a running joke on both of your channels that brennen has a major crush on you.
"oh god." you put a hand to your mouth, looking at all the replies arguing about which youtube channel is better. you hated how seriously all of this has become, you never wanted this many people hating on you on the internet but it seems like it was practically inevitable.
hearing a light knock on your door, you spotted milo looking at you. "hey just to let you know we're ready and waiting."
"alright, i'm coming."
the roadtrip was long, uncomfortable and almost unbearable. you were only two hours in and you were tired. since you planned this, everyone demanded you drive, atleast until you get too tired. finn offered to take turns with you. "hey vera, can you pass me that five hour energy shot?"
she chuckled, passing it to the front.
the car you had was very large, it was like a family van. you bought it, knowing you'd need space for camera equipment, and people since you were a youtuber. the seats were down in the back, creating a bed like base. was it a little unsafe? possibly, but you were a very good driver so you were confident it'd be fine.
finn opened the bottle for you, and you took it, chugging the container in a few seconds. before making a screeching sound. "yuck."
as he put his hand up to move his hair out of his face, milo started talking. "so like, what's so scary about this place?"
"oh i have tons of stories." you chuckle, gesturing for finn to grab the camera and place it on the dashboard. "hey guys! we're about two hours into the drive, and i think it's a good time to share why the stanley is so haunted." you smile.
"me and y/n did a lot of research and took some notes." finn shows the paper he's holding. "because she's driving i'm going to do most of the explanation this time."
he places the paper infront of him. "okay so first." he looks back to his brother. "ya'know the shining? like the movie."
"uhh yeah i think so." he shrugs. "why?"
"well the shining was created by stephen king, and it's based on a dream he had while staying here." "he had crazy dreams and feelings from the hotel. there's many different spirits that reside there."
"yeah like room 217, the most haunted room in the hotel. it's haunted by a spirit named elizabeth wilson, she was the hotels head housekeeper and didn't die in the room, but got injured during a storm in 1911, and now she chooses that room to stay in." you pip in, while turning.
"there's the vortex, which as you all know." finn looks to the camera. "is those mirrors facing eachother, creating a kind of portal, or 'rapid transit system' he repeats from his notes.
"also the concert hall." he continues. "if you watched our video from last year, you'll know we did a throughout investigation in the concert hall, where a young spirit called lucy lives. she basically froze to death outside after getting kicked out by janitors in super cold weather."
"i really recommend you guys go check out our first video about the stanley, because we give tons more information about the hauntings." vera says to the camera.
"i'm thirsty." milo groans.
the group laughs at him, you grabbing the camera and turning it off. finn throws a waterbottle into the back, not looking. it ends up hitting milos face, earning a scoff. "watch where you're throwing things."
finn just rolls his eyes, trying not to laugh. "sorry brother."
you chuckle at the sibling behaviour, before sighing looking out ahead at the road. "this is so tedious." you yawn.
finn laughed, before asking if you were okay to drive. "yeah, i'm okay. you guys should try and get some sleep! i'll pull over and wake finn up when i need to switch. but for now, really get some z's."
"you don't have to tell me twice!" vera announces, sinking into her blanket.
"i won't purposely try and fall asleep but if i do, wake me up the second you need to okay?" finn said, earning a nodd from you.
as the sun set fully, the dark began to set in. it was honestly pretty nice. there were no cars on the road, and occasionally anytime they went through a town there would be plenty of lights. it felt calm, rather than scary.
you felt like you were preparing yourself for the stanley. you had been once before, about a year and a half ago with just vera and finn, and your experience was crazy. so many noises, feelings, stuff moving around.
you loved the paranormal so even though places were crazy, it was fun. you were nervous about milo coming, knowing he didn't believe in ghosts, and from previous experiences in videos. you were scared about him disrespecting whatever was in the hotel.
you just hoped he'd be respectful, because this kind of stuff hit you hard. you've had tons of paranormal experiences ever since you were a kid.
you yawned, keeping your eyes on the road.
suddenly the car was lit up, you glanced down to your phone that was sitting in the cup holder. you had an instagram notification from tara, one of your youtuber mutuals.
you wouldn't exactly consider her a close friend, but you've gone to tons of partys with her. because of tara, you had met jake who was friends with sam and colby.
you actually really liked tara and jake, they were cool and really nice. you slowed the car down, pulling onto the side of the road to look at the notification.
she had messaged you a longish message.
tarayummy: hey girl, just wanted to ask if you knew that jake and the guys are going to the stanley tomorrow? i saw your tweet about going and wanted to warn you
y/nslittleworld: oh shit what? did they say that publicly? i had no idea they'd be there
you began to panic, you were clueless about the guys coming to the stanley hotel. what if they think you copied them?
tarayummy: no they haven't told their fans yet, jake saw your tweet and told them about you being there, so i thought it was fair i did the same
y/nslittleworld: thanks for the heads up! i'm about to start driving so i'll talk to you later :)
tarayummy: okok, have a good trip
about 4 hours later, you had to quit. your eyes watering from how bad you needed to sleep. you gave finn a nudge, and pulled over.
thankfully he was happy to help, and told you to rest while he drove. you were out like a light in seconds.
you woke up much later than you thought, it being around 7 in the morning. you stretched out, eyes opening to the bright sunlight hitting the car. yawning, you turned to finn, who was slumped into an uncomfortable position, driving the car.
"hey." you smiled, rubbing your eyes. "need me to take over? i didn't mean to sleep that long." you chuckle.
"no it's okay, i've got this." he said back, taking a sip of his monster.
"okay well, don't be too stubborn, let me know when you need to switch again."
he nodded.
"where are we?" vera asks, her voice raspy from waking up. with her arms over her head, she stretched, and cracked her back.
finn yawns. "close to colorado, we're in utah right now. about an hour till we're in colo, but 6 i think until we get to our hotel."
she groans. "we're so far away." "guys i have an announcement." you say, frowning. "sam and colby.. they're filming at the stanley today too."
"sam and colby?!" vera peeks up. "okay, okay i know this is bad for you but oh my god we're going to meet sam and colby." you and finn looked to her with confused faces.
"since when were you 9 years old." you say, rolling your eyes at her fangirling. this was your borderline competition, she can't be excited about the enemy.
"for real." finn adds, continuing to drive.
hours later, you four realized you were an hour behind schedule so you just decided to check into the stanley hotel early. you had room 217 and 401 reserved, luckily.
you wondered where sam and colby were staying.
you carried two bags into the main room you wanted to stay in, which was 217. "guys, hurry up." you rushed them, waiting for them to follow you.
finn nodded, grabbing his and veras bags, her and milo following close behind. "i'm excited." finn states.
"me too actually, last time it was crazy! i'm excited to see what happens." vera smiles to him.
"this camera equipment is so heavy." slowly one of the bags starts to fall from your grip.
"i got it." milo rushes to your side, grabbing the bag. he smirks, now hip to hip with you. you smiled back awkwardly.
you weren't the biggest fan of milo for multiple reasons. the way he treated vera, and what he does behind her back. like smirk, wink and touch your shoulder unwantedly. it made you uncomfortable everytime but you brushed it off as just his cocky flirty personality.
"this is our door!" you call out, setting the bag down temporarily to unlock the door with the key. milo pushes open the door, holding it open for you.
everyone shuffles in and puts their bags down onto the floor. "okay." you sigh, relieved.
"now what do we do?" vera asked, looking around before jumping on the bed. "woo!"
"i'm thinking change, and we go check out the bar, maybe get something to drink and eat?" you offer up earning nods from the group.
"yes please." finn moans at the thought of food.
as you four make your way downstairs, you start to hear loud male voices. you pause, holding your arm out so nobody comes down. you listen, hearing jakes voice.
"sam, colby, jake and corey are at the front desk." you whisper.
"be non chalant." milo shrugs, walking infront. you all follow him down the stairs, like he was a bodyguard.
you adjust your tank top, pulling it up, and uncreasing your baggy jeans.
immediately you see the four guys, standing and talking to the camera. jake notices you first, eyes widening before waving. his wave got the attention of the rest of the group and they turned to see you four walking to the bar.
the four guys were looking at your group.
you accidentally lock eyes with colby, before his trail down, clearly checking out you. eventually you're walking out of sight and his eyes follow you. "i can't believe she's here on the same day we are." he mumbles.
sam took a step away from the group, glancing towards the bar. there you were, giggling with your friends, sipping a drink. even though your fanbases rivaled, he was a huge fan of your channel, and loved your content.
"i know, it's crazy. what are the odds?" he chuckles, sending a polite smile your way when you notice him staring. 'odd' you think to yourself.
"what if we did a video with them." he suggested.
"dude that would be sick if we teamed up." jake agreed with the other.
colby stared at them with wide eyes, wondering what the fuck they were thinking. "guys, no fucking way." he said. "sam what has gotten into you. don't you remember that she hates us? and vice versa."
"she's not even that bad, all she did was block you on instagram." he shrugged.
"what did you do brother." corey shakes his head in disappointment.
"all i did was make a dumb joke last year, and she blocked me." colby shrugged, frustrated.
"that's such a half truth." jake called him out. "you literally made a sexist joke towards her and didn't apologize, and your fans sent her death threats and you didn't do anything about it."
sam and colby looked to eachother, not even knowing about the hate messages you were receiving because of them. "shit really?"
"there's no way you didn't know. her instagram dms, comments, youtube comments are full with hate from toxic fans." jake pushed.
"i really didn't know." sam said, putting his hands up, grimancing. "i should go over there and apologize." he began to walk towards the bar before colby grabbed and pulled him back by his arm.
"dude no, that's so embarrassing." he said, rubbing the back of his neck. "besides, she's being dramatic over a dumb, obvious joke i made." colby tried to explain what he thought was right. "i didn't do a single thing to upset her, it was a joke." he defended.
"what is up with you." sam shakes his head, not recognizing his best friend. he sounded like an asshole, and he couldn't figure out why.
while in reality, colby was just embarrassed for making such an ignorant joke... an ignorant joke to someone he actually looked up to. both sam and colby had been privately watching your videos, honestly getting inspired to make their own content.
"yo, are you guys good to check in? i might go say hi to y/n." jake said, ignoring colby's eyes.
"actually can i come too? i'd like to meet her, and apologize." sam asked.
"i feel left out, i want to meet her too." corey said.
"okay, we're going to y/n, you can come if you want i guess." jake says towards colby, before they began to walk away.
"yo, y/n!" jake called out, walking in your direction. you turned, just expecting jake, shocked to see corey and sam following behind him.
"hey jake!" you smiled, hopping off the barstool to hug him. "i've missed you, it's been awhile." you sayy, sitting back down, before hesitantly looking to the other guys.
finn looked up from his phone, seeing them surround your area. he made sure to keep an eye out for you while vera and milo were drinking a few chairs down.
"it really has." he sat down on the chair next to you. "this is uh sam and corey." he gestures towards them.
"oh hi, what's up." you sit their awkwardly, doing the so called white person face out of awkwardness.
"hey, i'm corey." he holds out his hand, you give it a little shake.
"good to meet you." you smile, sensing his chill personality. you are then met with sam, him standing there awkwardly, trying to figure out a way to apologize to you.
you being socially awkward and hating the silence, speak first. "it's uh cool to finally meet you." you nod, avoiding eye contact with him, not sure on how he's feeling about the situation.
"it's awesome to meet you too, i'm a fan of your content." he smiles, making you surprised and flustered, not expecting that.
"wow really?" you giggle. "i could say the same thing about your channel." you take notice of one boy missing and glance around. he notices your wandering eyes.
"colby's uh.." sam trailed off, looking to the check in desk, before realizing he wasn't there. he felt a hand on his shoulder and jumped back, before realizing said boy was right behind him. "right here i guess." he says, rubbing the back of his neck.
"we were just looking for you brother." corey says, grabbing his shoulder.
"i uh put the bags in the room, it's a pretty nice room actually." he says to his group, trying to not even look in the direction of you. you notice the behavior and spin the stool around, to talk to finn about exploring.
you hear the guys murmur, not exactly sure what they're saying until you hear a groan and a sigh.
"yeah i'm thinking we take a look around at the hotel right now while it's light out, and visit our other room." finn said, taking out a map of the hotel, since it's been awhile.
"i agree, sounds like a great idea." you nod.
"hey y/n." a voice says from behind you. you turn to see sam again. "would you be down to do a collab or something for atleast a part of both yours and our series?"
hesitantly, you pause, looking towards finn. "what do you think?" you give him a confused face, so he's aware you're not sure of the idea.
he also makes a face.
sam clears his throat. "it's totally okay if not, no pressure." he smiles.
you nod slowly. "i guess we could." you shrug, sipping more of your drink. "what do you have in mind?" out of the corner of your eye you see vera and milo make their way towards you, the latter glaring at the guys infront of you.
"what's going on here?" he asks, leaning on the bar.
"oh hey. this is sam." you introduce him, them shaking hands, milo's cleary very stiff. "he want's to do a collab with my channel."
he raises an eyebrow. "anyways, we're doing a seance later, so i thought maybe if you and your friends wanted to join it?”
you sigh. “i dont know, seances are very powerful and not to be disrespected. i would only agree if you guys were doing it properly, no jokes, no mocking.” you said seriously.
“i mean we can try our best, but when we’re scared we tend to joke a bit, im sure we could take it more seriously.”
“i.. i don’t know.”
“here well i’ll give you my number just incase you change your mind.” he smiles towards you. you nod your head, handing him your phone.
he gives it back and you slide it into your pocket. “hopefully i’ll see you later.” he looks proud of himself as he walks away to the guys. jake waves to you, before they’re out of eyesight, probably going to explore.
you blush slightly at his kindness. before finn nudges you with his elbow and raises his eyebrow.
“what was that about? why are you blushing.” he interrogates you, making you blush more.
“he’s cute.” you shrug, trying to lessen your large smile. “and he just exchanged numbers with me.”
everyone decides to finish their drinks before they go anywhere. you were pretty surprised and happy about the events of a few moments ago.
you had been trying to squash whatever was previously between you, sam and colby, so this was a good start. you were pretty flustered when vera and milo started asking about the blush on your cheeks.
sam on the other hand, when his friends, mainly jake questioned him about you, he was holding himself together, not showing any weakness. “what are you guys talking about.” he shakes his head at the claims of him liking you.
“that was so flirty of you brother.” corey points out, smirking at him.
“are you guys gonna bone.” jake jokes, making a weird voice.
“ew, dont say that.” “thats weird.” sam says, shaking his head once more.
“she is pretty hot.” colby comments, looking at her as he walks away.
“colbyyy.” corey calls out at him. “don’t be a weirdo, bro.”
sam huffed at his friends childish behaviour, but to be fair if the roles were switched he would probably tease them about it too.
if he was being honest, you were really cute, and he loved your personality. every video you’ve made, he’s watched and not just watched, enjoyed.
he’s wasn’t following you on any socials, but he always checked up on them every week or so. he was well aware of your fanbases rivalling, and he was obviously there when colby made the comment about you and he remembers in a video of yours when you said that you disliked the duo.
after hearing that and seeing you block colby, he assumed you wouldn’t want him following you either.
but after what jake said, he realized how shitty him and colby had been. he couldnt believe all the hate you were getting on twitter. when jake showed him, his mouth was wide open, shocked at how horrible their fans were being to you.
the worst hate comment he had gotten from this whole situation was a few of your fans saying you were better then him. and he was used to comments like that from the traphouses prank war.
he felt horrible, and wanted to apologize, but he felt weird doing it with everyone around him which is why he wanted to see you again, so he could say sorry in a private setting.
and he did have to admit, that he just wanted to talk and see you again too. he definitely had a crush on you, and has had one for atleast a year now.
your style, your personality it was just above and beyond what he was attracted to. one problem.. he could tell colby thought the same as him.
the boy would never admit this, but sam remembered one time a few months ago where he came over, and saw you on colby’s tv screen. he had been binging your channel on a thursday night.
it was clear he liked your videos, and content because a week after you uploaded a video, he copied the point of it and did his own verison.
sam encouraged him to apologize or talk to you but he was being too arrogant and full of himself. he didnt want to seem like he was in the wrong, even if he was. (which he knew he was)
“so you invited her to the seance?” colby asked, as they walked around outside.
“yeah, she said she’ll think about it.” sam replied.
“i hope she does, she seems cool, id like to get to know her.” corey said, genuinely liking your clothing style and hair. he thought it made you unique, and in the best way possible.
“her group is also going to explore soon so we might see them around.” sam added.
“great.” colby rolled his eyes.
“brother, if you just apologize, it’ll be fine. y/n is so forgiving. trust me, before i knew her i spilt my drink all over her outfit at a party. she was so cool about it.” jake said, trying to explain how chill you were.
“it’s not that easy.” he scoffed, frustrated at this dumb feud he caused between the two of you. but to be fair, he still thought you were too dramatic about it.
“whatever colby.” sam shrugged, before pulling out his camera and updating the viewers about the concert hall they were going to explore.
you, and the three others finished what you were doing at the bar, and headed back to your room to unpack a few items, mainly stuff to film with and use.
you had the spirit box in hand. you were really excited to use the estes method, because you hadn’t tried it before, and finding out it was invented here at the stanley was crazy.
finn grabbed the emf reader and walked with it around the room. it blinked to the first level before staying grey. “mm nothings showing up, we’ll definitely retry it later.” he says to the camera.
"the emf is one of my favourite devices, it'll either be neutral or just going off like fucking crazy." vera says, scrolling on her phone. "oh also y/n, you're trending on twitter." she says carelessly.
"what?!" you exclaim rushing over. trending on twitter was almost always a bad thing so you panicked as you pulled the phone from her.
you read the headline. "famous youtuber, y/n photographed in etes park, colorado by fan." "huh." you scroll under #y/n, and see a picture of yourself at a gas station you stopped at on the way.
"that's not creepy at all." finn murmurs.
"yeah like what the hell, the fan didn't even come say hi or ask for an actual picture." vera says, with a slightly disgusted face.
"maybe they were just nervous." you shrug. "thank god i'm not cancelled or something." you chuckle, anxiously.
"what would you even be cancelled for? being too nice?" milo gave a rhetorical question, making vera laugh.
"no really though, what would i get cancelled for." you thought aloud.
"definitely murdering someone." finn replied, before snickering. "you scare me when you're angry."
"heyy, i'm not that bad." you said, rolling your eyes.
"you threw a book at me when i didn't do the dishes!"
"it was your turn! you are supposed to do the dishes once a week! once! i do it five times a week! they were there for 2 fucking days!" you shout, jokingly frustrated.
"i forgot!" he defends, chuckling to the camera. "this is what i go through on a daily guys." he says for sympathy points to the viewers.
"should we start exploring?" you ask.
"hell yeah." vera grins, putting on a sweater.
"okay guys." finn hands the camera to you. "we are now going to the other room we reserved, room 401 and hopefully we'll hear children laughing."
it had been about thirty minutes, you holding the emf reader, slowly walking around the room and asking questions. vera was looking out the window, spotting the guys from earlier, milo was watching you with the emf, curious on how it worked, and finn was editing a video you had filmed a few days ago.
nothing had been happening, so everyone was just relaxing.
but suddenly, the emf reader went to orange, you dropped it out of fright, everyone looking at the device going off. "holy shit." you mutter.
"is there someone in this room with us?" finn asks, looking up from the laptop.
the emf went green, before boosting up to orange again.
milo's eyes widened. "woah."
"are you a child?" the question made the device turn off.
"are you a maid? or one of the-" it shot back to orange.
"this has never happened before." you say to the camera. "this has been the only time that the emf and the questions have been spot on."
it was about 30 minutes later, and you were leaving the room by yourself. everyone was a bit tired as well as bored, and decided to chill out. it was about 8 now, and you checked your phone as you were walking around the hotel.
you realized sam had messaged you a few minutes ago.
sam from the bar: "hey! just checking in. if you're free, us four are about to go into the concert hall if you and your friends want to join."
sam had been waiting for a reply, looking at his phone every few seconds, before sighing and putting it down. just as he was walking into the doors with colby, corey and jake, his phone vibrated. "guys wait!" he called out.
y/n: hey! i'm totally down :) the rest of the crew is napping in our second room rn so it would just be me, is that cool?
you didn't have to wait for a reply, him texting back immediately.
sam from the bar: yeah that's awesome, we'll wait for you outside the hall
you began your walk outside, quickly realizing you should've brought a sweater, the wind nipping at your exposed shoulders and neck. you saw them in the distance and waved.
sam took notice of you, and smiled at your gesture, before waving back. he saw you were still wearing the clothes from earlier, and realized how could you must be. in this moment he wished he would've worn a sweater he could give to you.
he saw a smirk on colbys face as you made your way over, and scoffed quietly.
"hey y/n!" you heard from sam. you quickly rushed over and you stood infront of him.
"hey sam!" you gave him a light side hug, before looking to the others. "so, are you guys ready to meet lucy?"
"no." corey fake cries.
as you begin to walk in, you trip up the stairs, colby snickering, before making a comment. "watch where you're walking princess." he rolls his eyes, stepping by you.
sam holds his hand out for you, helping you up before giving colby a face, as if to ask why he was still being a dick.
you tried to ignore him, and turned your flash on, looking around the concert hall. it was pitch black, and looked very creepy, everything neutral and dead looking colours.
colby and corey pointed out the mirror that had pictures taken in it, before a loud bang was heard. "what was that." jake turned to the area, before corey discovered a picture he took with a streak down the middle.
"that looks like a face almost." colby said.
"to me it just looks like something to do with the mirror, and the flash." you shrug, getting an annoyed face from the boy.
corey started taking more pictures, and a light turned off in the other room, getting colby's attention. everyone stood still, facing the room. "i have a horrible feeling about that room." he said.
in a few seconds everyone was running out of the building, from a picture that showed lucy peeking around a piece of furniture. sam looked at you before going back into that room with corey, trying to figure out what the shadow could have been.
you, colby and jake were sitting in the other room, jake distracted on his phone. you clearly caught colby checking you out, him watching you carefully.
"so where's your crew?" he asked, with a odd tone of voice.
"they are napping and relaxing in our room." you said, short and plain, avoiding eye contact with him.
"cool." he was mentally slapping himself. he had no idea how to start a conversation with someone, especially someone that he had offended. "are you dating that kid? the one with the dark brown hair?"
you raised an eyebrow. "that's not really your business, but no i'm not. he's my best friend. also his name's finn."
"he looks like a nerd." he points out, trying to joke, but only making you more uncomfortable. "that other guy though, looks like an asshole."
"he is. and that's milo." colby sees your face as you talk about him, making him curious. he watches as you shiver from the cold, and he sighs, taking off his sweater.
"you're so unprepared." he chucks his sweater in your direction, it hitting your eye. you wince, before scoffing.
"what the fuck." you mutter, rubbing it until the pain lessens.
"cmon princess, lighten up." he hums, finding amusement out of your annoyed face. he could tell you were getting more and more pissed off. "if you were smarter, maybe you would've worn a sweater."
"i'm not taking your dirty ass sweater." you throw it back at him, it practically slapping him.
he shrugs, seeing you shiver once more. "your loss."
as soon as corey and sam rush out of the back room, colby shuffles away from you, pretending to be on his phone.
"we need to leave." corey says, eyes watering. you all follow him outside, and look at the pictures he's been taking.
"jesus." you mutter.
sam stands right next to you, his arm touching yours. you visibly blush at the action, and take a small step away when colby starts watching you. "this is crazy." sam states, zooming into the picture.
"lucy is definitely calling you guys pussies." jake jokes, making you laugh.
corey refuses to go back in and eventually convinces the rest of the guys to go back to their hotel room. you agree, thanking them for inviting you.
as the others leave, sam stays behind a second. "you're really cool." he comments.
you gush at that, and giggle, trying to stop the red coming to your face. "thank you, you're cool too, i look forward to the seance, which i've decided to join."
sam grins. "awesome! we'll do it around 3am if thats okay with your guys."
"that's fine with them." you say, looking into his bright blue eyes. "you're a lot nicer than i thought."
"vice versa, you're so much more chill then i imagined."
"you imagined meeting me?" you say, jokingly pouting before laughing.
"i actually have, pretty big fan right here." he plays into the joke. it's silent for a few seconds, just the two of you looking at eachother.
sam tried to keep himself from looking at your body, finding it disrespectful since he just met you, but his eyes wandered slightly, the outfit you were wearing attracting him. the way it hugged your curves, it made him drool.
"you're really pretty." he huffs, slightly frustrated at how attractive you were.
you're absolutely stunned hearing that, your face clearly showing you were giddy. you knew both of you had been sharing little touches since you met, and been flirting very slightly but you didn't actually think anything would come from it.
"you are too, sam. you're pretty." you say back, making him smile.
"can i kiss your cheek?" he asks. your smile is unbearably large, it starting to hurt.
"yes, you may." right as you say that, he kisses your left cheek, his hand lightly hovering around your waist. his lips were on your face, so close to your own.
you were never one for kissing on a first date, so only just meeting this guy, talking to him a few times and letting him kiss your cheek was crazy.
you honestly wished he would've asked for a real kiss. you definitely would've said yes. his lips leave you, his breath hitting your neck. "i think-"
right as he began to talk, a loud shout came from a window on the top floor. "sam, hurry the fuck up!" colby yells, smirking. it was like he was watching for the correct moment, wanting to interrupt.
sam sighs, his head dipping. "i'm sorry, i have to go." he rubs the back of his neck anxiously.
"it's okay." you say, still smiley. "thank you for the kiss." you look back up at colby and you can see him still looking. you propped yourself up on your tippy toes and gave him a quick kiss, before walking into the hotel, him following slowly.
he didn't know why but he was obsessed with you, watching from the window. he couldn't take his eyes off of you. and when he saw you kissing his best friend, he felt irritated. (from his angle it looked like you were actually kissing sam)
he honestly felt like some kind of stalker. he sighed, from the window, shaking his head. you were making him crazy.
as you got back to your room, you saw your friends asleep. milo and vera were on either side of the bed, and finn was sleeping on a foot rest. you grimanced at that, and woke him up. "dude, that cannot be comfortable." you laugh quietly.
he groaned. "it's not. this sucks." he looks over to vera, sleeping peacefully.
"wanna go to the other room?" you ask, he nods.
both you and finn walk to the other room. you both moan once you lay on the bed. it was so uncomfortable after standing and walking around the entire time. "god this is the comfiest bed." you say, stretching your arms.
"i agree." "so how was the concert hall?"
you blush, remembering what happened. "sam kissed my cheek." you whisper, him getting up and looking at you.
"no way! really?" he smiles for you, happy that you're finally having a chance at a relationship.
"it was so.. ahhhh." you can't even finish talking, before you throw yourself into a pillow, screaming into it.
"also at 3am they want to do the seance." you said, letting him know. he nodded and continued to lay down.
you quickly both fell asleep, sleeping peacefully. however you slept a lot longer then you anticipated. when your first alarm went off, you were shocked.
you had set a 2am alarm, so you could be ready for 3.
you didn't think you were that tired to nap for a few hours. you threw the blanket off of you and quickly realized finn was sound asleep next to you. you rushed to turn off your alarm, and once you did you watched him snore for a few seconds.
glad that he was still asleep, you got up and dug through your duffle bag, looking for something else to wear. you quickly changed into black baggy jeans, and a white tee. you grabbed finns sweater and put it on as your teeth began to chatter.
you were annoyed at yourself for forgetting a sweater, something you wore almost everyday. bored of waiting for the time to pass, you decided to take a walk around the hotel again.
as you're walking down the stairs, you hear a few children laughing. you jolt to look behind you, seeing nothing there. maybe it was just your mind playing tricks on you.
continuing your stroll, you see the bar closed, a few benches scattered around second floor. about to go sit, you see colby walking in your direction. "hey princess. didn't expect to see you here." he has that smug smile still on his face.
you, not wanting to deal with his arrogance turn away from him, and go sit on the bench. he follows, sitting next to you. "what? am i disturbing your 'me time'."
"yes, actually you are." you snap at him. you hated when people purposely tried to push your buttons. "i'm not in the mood for whatever you're trying to do." you sigh.
"i'm not trying to do anything, i'm just talking." he shrugs, noticing your sweater. he remembers seeing finn wear that earlier at the bar. "are you sure you're not dating your friend." he pinchs at the hoodie.
you pull your arm back away from him. "i didn't bring a sweater and i'm freezing. i already told you we were just friends."
"so you're single?"
you pause, thinking. maybe if you said you were taken, he would leave you alone. "i didn't say that."
colby raised his eyebrow. "so you're telling me your in a relationship but kissing my best friend?"
closing your eyes, you scoff. "can you just leave me alone. i don't understand why you hate me, and like i said, i don't want to deal with your bullshit."
he stops, genuinely feeling a bit bad. "i don't hate you." he says lowly, looking around the lobby.
you turn to him. "sure." you scoff. "first you make an asshole comment towards me, basically bringing down everything i've worked for, making it seem like nothing, then you and sam let your fans attack me, now when i actually meet you, hoping to squash whatever this is, you're being an asshole to me." standing up to walk away, he pulls you back.
"i don't hate you." he reassures, holding a tight grasp onto your arm. he looks into your eyes, with such a sincere emotion on his face.
you shake your head. "then why are you such a dick?"
"because i'm an idiot. okay y/n? i'm a fucking idiot. your channel, you, are so inspiring, and i'm intimidated by you. the fact our subscribers are so close, and your fans are loyal to you, it intimidates me.
he grates his teeth together. "because i know that you're going to beat us, and that our fans are going to like you better. because you're such a genuinely cool person."
"i made a dumb joke, and didn't want to admit i was wrong..." he trails off. "so.." "so i'm sorry." he finally apologizes. your eyes are almost watering from how deep that apology was.
"and.. i think i like you." he adds, his hand moving from your arm, lower to your wrist.
your mind was running a thousand miles a second. not even a few minutes ago this guy was teasing you, and you hated him for it. now he was confessing that he was in the wrong, and likes you.
what were you going to do? there was sam, a kind, cute and gentle guy, taking his time to get to know you, and then there was colby. an edgy, incredibly attractive, deep but bold guy.
you were leaning towards sam, he has been kind to you since the beginning.
but quickly, you weren't left with a choice in the matter. colby put his hand on your back, and pulled you into him, his lips touching yours.
you were about to pull away, but something about the scenario made you stay. kissing him back, you couldn't help but be attracted to him. he was bold, and dominant. it was obvious from the way he was kissing you, completely overpowering your mouth.
eventually you get ahold of yourself, and push him back, hands staying on his chest. "colby.."
"shit i'm sorry y/n." he pulls away, turning his back to you. "fuck." he mutters. "i'm sorry, i don't know what came over me." suddenly the tension in the air pauses, as his phone rings. he reads the contact.
"sam." he mumbles, before answering.
you sit there, listening, feeling guilty. you had no commitment towards the other boy, but god did you feel bad, like you had cheated on a partner.
"hey colby, where are you?" his voice comes through the phone.
"i'm just in the lobby."
"why are you in the lobby?" he asks, confused.
"i was just taking a walk since i woke up early. i've been reading a magazine down here." he looks to you as he lies to sam.
"oh, okay. well it's about to be three, so i'm gonna message y/n and invite them over to do the seance." you panic, looking to colby before running upstairs, to hurry and get to your room. he frowned, watching you leave.
you got to your room, opening and closing the door quickly. finn sat awake on the bed. "where have you been?" he saw the panic in your eyes. "y/n are you okay?" he gets over to you and looks at your face.
"colby kissed me.. and i kissed him back." your breath got shallow, and it felt hard to breathe. your chest was going up and down frantically.
finn knew you had anxiety, and he had dealt with attacks like this before. he ushered you onto the bed, and held your hand. "hey y/n it's okay." he rubbed your back gently.
as you breathing got back to normal you gave finn a large hug. "what do i do."
"what you want." he answers. "you owe nothing to either of them so, plus why are you trying to make up your mind right now? you just met them, silly." he continues to rub your back.
"okay." you breath, before a knock at the door makes you jolt. you check your phone seeing two messages from sam.
sam from the bar: hey, we're going to set up the seance soon sam from the bar: i'm gonna come to your room if that's okay
finn decided to answer the door for you, only having it slightly open. he saw sam standing there awkwardly. "hey man." he greeted him. "we're just getting ready."
sam nods. "alright, i'll wait here for you guys."
finn shut the door, asking if you were okay, you nodded. he noticed his sweater was on you, before rolling his eyes. he got dressed, and called vera.
she said she would meet at sam's room in the next 15 minutes.
you said hi to sam as you opened the door, and he started to talk to you about what was going to happen during the seance. finn was right behind you, listening to his explanation.
you saw vera and milo standing outside their door, vera in her pajamas, while milo was wearing a tank top and cargo shorts.
they waved at you and finn, vera giving you a hug. "i'm so ready for this." she says, excitedly.
"i know right." finn adds, earning a smile from her. milo just shrugs, still tired.
you walk into their room, immediately seeing colby sitting on the bed looking at his phone. right as he sees you he puts it away and looks at you to see what you're thinking.
you take a deep breath and start chatting to corey and jake about how they were feeling towards the seance. you glanced towards colby, seeing him whisper to sam before he pulled him out of the room.
you tried to stay calm about it, hoping the situation was unrelated to you.
colby stood a few feet away from sam, taking a deep breath. "what's up?" he asked, seeing the other looking nervous.
"i have something to tell you.."
as they were chatting, you continued to talk about the seance, and you asked corey about the safety precautions they were taking. which were none other than being saged.
"i swear to god if a spirit follows me because you guys are being stupid." you shake your head at them.
everyone assembles on the floor, sitting in a circle. finn sits on one side of vera, while milo sits on the other. you grimace at finn, him shrugging, accepting it.
sam and colby re-enter the hotel room, both looking smug. you let out a sigh of relief, assuming since they were both in a good mood, that they didn't talk about what had happened.
sam takes a seat on your left, while colby, your right. you look to him, seeing a smirk across his lips. you couldn't help but stare, thinking he looked so attractive right then, a bead of sweat falling down his forehead.
sam had his normal gentle smile on his face. "alright, are you guys ready?" he asked, looking to everyone around the circle, before leaning to spill the salt in a circle between the group.
you did honor of lighting a few candles, flicking the lighter. corey began to get really freaked out hearing little noises, feeling things, and noticing the candies moving.
"i have a really bad feeling." he was being really defensive, about doing the seance, refusing because he was thinking about what the physic said.
because of that, he decided to sit out, leaning on the window seat. you all began to hold hands.
sam reached his hand out to you, you taking it. it was soft but he was definitely nervous, the light layer of sweat giving him away. you then gave your other hand to colby, he took it quickly.
his hand was freezing, and more calloused.
you flinched at a sudden noise coming from the closet. corey stood up in awe, shouting. "what was that." "in the closet!" he stood up pointing. "dude! can we stop?"
"i think whenever we hear things it means we should keep going." jake comments, shuffling closer.
"exactly, what's the point of the video if we stop the most important part?" you say, looking into your camera placed next to you.
"yeah we're literally saying lets do this, then-." sam is quickly cut off by corey.
"i hate this crap." he goes to sit on the bed, and watches. sams hand rejoins yours, and everyone closes their eyes for a few seconds, preparing themselves.
sam says a few things, talking to the spirits, telling them they can't harm any of us, while noises in the room pick up. weird knocks from the closet and bangs on the roof.
he encouraged corey to open the door, before he sat back down again.
colby sighed, trying to get him to join the seance, his hand up to gesture with.
he placed it back down, but on your upper thigh, before giving it a squeeze. you lightly gasped at that, everyone too busy to notice. you shot him a glare, only making grip harder.
shaking your head, you noticed corey sitting next to him now. you took the hint to grab the boys hands again.
sam kept speaking, leading the seance, asking about their experiences so far in the night, and acknowledging their room was haunted by a cowboy.
colby spoke up. "you moved the lolipops, we heard you earlier while we were relaxing, it's not time to play games anymore, use our energy, show us you're here."
a candle's light blinked, spooking the boys, followed by more noises coming from the closet. you shivered, sensing something around you.
corey got scared, standing up, followed by colby. "i'm out." he said, hands up.
you gave him a look. "literally why." you rolled your eyes, earning an annoyed face from him.
jake agreed with you, wondering why they would quit after hearing what they wanted.
sam sat his hand on your lower thigh before moving it to your back, reassuring you in this situation. he knew you weren't scared, you were fearless, but he felt he should comfort you regardless.
eventually everyone sat back down again, vera this time quitting, going on her phone in the corner. finn following short after, taking this as a chance to talk to her one on one since they got here.
you close your eyes as noises began to happen again, and right as it's getting good, you get pulled back by sam, grabbing your arm. everyone but jake is rushing to the corners of the room, away from the closet.
corey rushed out of the room, leaving everyone behind. you ripped away from sams grasp, not wanting to follow. he sighed, before telling you he'd be back.
you walked to finn and vera, milo behind you. "this is crazy." he comments, looking out the window to see the guys filming.
"i understand being scared but genuinely what's the point of committing to a seance then disrespecting the spirits willing to talk?" you say, sighing, leaning on vera.
"i'm tired." you yawn, realizing the lack of sleep you've been getting. "to be honest i might go back to our main room."
vera, for once during the trip agrees with you, asking if she can come along. you notice how she avoids milo, even as he's asking her to come to the other room.
finn notices as well. he waits back a few minutes as both of you leave, wanting to talk to his brother.
you glance at vera. she looked upset. "you okay vee?" when she looks up at you, it's obvious she had been crying. "oh my god, are you okay." you grab her face gently.
"no." she begins to sob, pulling you in for a hug. "i'm so stupid y/n.. so stupid to think he would want me for something other than sex."
you comfort her on your way to the room, asking her what happened. "he's been talking to a girl he met in the lobby all day." she pouts. "he told me that he might go have sex with her.. not even 10 minutes ago." you hug her tightly.
"vera, it's okay. he's just a douchebag to not realize what was right infront of him."
"nobody is gonna love me the way i want to be loved." she pours out. you think for a minute, finn..
"vera.. i believe in soulmates okay? and i know you have one for a fact. don't get too upset over milo. we tried to warn you about his behavior, i'm sorry."
"it's okay. i was too blinded by his handsome face." she sighs, wiping her eyes. you feel a vibration in your pocket, pulling out your phone.
you see both a message from colby, and sam. you put it away, focusing on vera. "you'll get over him girl, look at you! you're so gorgeous, and funny, there's someone that will treat you like a princess."
you hear a knock at the door. "hey, it's uh finn." you look to vera, and she nods.
opening the door, you see finn with a already turning black eye. his left eye looked like something out of an action movie. "holy shit!" you shout, before covering your mouth, aware of the noise complaint you've already gotten.
"holy fuck." you whisper. "what happened?"
he shakes his head. "did something i should've done awhile ago. i punched milo." he says proudly, vera poking her head up. she rushes to him, wiping the slight blood away from his face. "andd.. he punched me back."
"jesus." vera exhales. "now why'd you have to go and do that?" finn looks to you, and gestures to your phone. you check the notifications from sam and colby, asking where you had gone.
"ohh." you said, getting the hint to leave. you smirk at him, pulling out a finger gun or two before leaving.
right as you step into the hall, there are the boys. sam notices you immediately, asking what happened. "just a little tussle between brothers over a girl, nothing much." you say. "how's corey? still being a puss?" colby snickers.
"yeah, but we atleast got him back into the room, so he's chilling out now."
you three stand in awkward silence, taking notice of how they look at you. you clear your throat before speaking. "i'm really tired." a yawn slips its way out of your mouth.
"us too. corey's already sleeping, snoring like a madman." sam says, making you giggle.
"it's so loud." colby rolls his eyes.
"i get that, finn snores sometimes. i can usually hear it from the other room in our apartment, boy does it piss me off." you relate to them, before they walk you to your room.
you open the door, looking in to see if milo was around. your eyes widen, seeing his luggage gone. "milo must've called a cab." you say, turning to them.
they both look at you with smug looks, like they had been for most of the night. "if you guys want, you can sleep in here to avoid the snoring." you offer. "but i'm going to fucking bed."
you walk into the bathroom, changing into some pajamas. by pajamas, you mean almost no clothing at all because you get too dang hot.
as you're freshening up you hear a few whispers. "we don't even know if she'd be into that." sam said lowly.
you yawn loudly, coming out of the bathroom.
the way their eyes watched your body.. it drove you crazy. you quickly took notice of their lack of clothes, while in your bed. very bold of them to think you'd let them sleep with you. it was a queen bed but is that really enough for three strangers.
"you guys are surely making yourselves comfortable." you point out, seeing the only space for you was in the middle of them.
sam rubs the back of his neck, apologizing anxiously. "sorry, we can sleep on the couch or something." colby rolls his eyes at his friends behaviour.
"it's okay, as long as you too don't make me sweaty i'll be fine." they look to eachother at that.
jumping into the bed, you get under the covers between them. because you were nervous about the situation, you laid stomach down, face into your pillow.
you would never get tired of this amazing bed, god was it comfortable. and having two attractive, shirtless guys on either side of you made it even better.
you felt the bed dip as they came closer, colby touching you first, his finger trailing along your side. "i like this outfit." he mumbles close to your ear, making you melt.
the feeling of his hand caressing you was something out of a movie or book. it started from your arm, down to your waistline, his finger rubbing light circles between your waist and shorts.
"it's pretty." sam comments. you giggled, clearly seeing how different both of them are. to you, it seemed like colby was teasing you and trying to turn you on, while sam was making you feel like the most important girl in the world. and woah the combination of it made you flustered.
"thanks." you say into the pillow, making colby chuckle. his hand slowly going to your ass, you breathed shakily as it happened, but let him.
and in seconds, he was taking a handful and squishing it, massaging it, whatever you want to call it. he was obsessed with your ass. you propped yourself up slightly, turning onto your back just to frustrate him.
you watched his eyes flicker as he couldn't touch that part of you anymore. your lips were slightly stuck out, pouty almost at the heat you were feeling. "fuck y/n, you're so hot." he blurted out, not regretting it.
you looked to sam, trying to tell his reaction with how dark it was. you couldn't decipher what was happening, and if both of them were coming onto you. it seemed like they both talked about it before hand, and now just needed your permission.
you locked eyes with colby, his hand coming to your neck, and lighting hovering over it.
gulping, you lean back a bit, hesitant. he notices, and goes back to touching your side. "he's right. y/n you're the most gorgeous girl on this planet."
colby didn't like sharing your attention, pulling your face to look at him gently. his eyes flickered to your lips, and you nodded.
his hand slid behind your head, holding you in place as his tongue explored your lips. you kissed back, feeling how passionate he was. his body moving in a rhythm. as he pulled away slowly, he looked at you hungrily.
sam took this as an opportunity. "can i kiss your neck, y/n?" he asked, you nodding frantically. the way you felt right now, it was almost unbearable.
he started kissing your neck area, sucking and biting at your skin. you hoped he didn't leave any marks.. but secretly you craved it, thinking about the way you would show off their lovebites.
you felt colby's mouth on you now too, licking down your stomach till your shorts. he lightly tugged at them, making you move to where he could pull them straight off.
he lightly trailed his hand around your thigh, getting closer and closer to where you wanted him. he moved, getting inbetween your legs, and licking up your thigh.
you let out a raspy moan at the combination of sam's mouth on your neck, and colby's tongue getting closer. once he heard you moan, he came back up to kiss you again.
"you sound pretty needy, princess." he comments, both of them taking back their touches, making you open your eyes.
you look to both of them, colby clearly confident in his teasing. "fuck i want to kill you." you groan, shaking your head as he chuckles.
2K notes · View notes
yuujispinkhair · 7 months
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Brother (Part 2)
When you start dating Yuuji, you don't know that your sweet sunshine boy has an evil twin who wants to have his brother's girl, too.
Part 1 ++ Halloween Masterlist 2023
Pairing: Sukuna x Reader (female) + Yuuji x Reader Genre: Horror, smut Word Count: 6k Warnings: 18+, dark content, consensual sex with Yuuji + noncon with Sukuna. Rough sex, degradation, humiliation, getting called slut, whore, cheater. Forced orgasms, pussy spanking, squirting, cumshots, creampie, kind of forced breeding. Sukuna isn't a nice guy in this story. Sukuna and Yuuji look completely alike. Sukuna doesn't have his tattoos. All characters are of age. This story is 18+. Minors don't interact.
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The flashbacks of that night haunt your every thought. The memories of being forced to watch yourself in that dirty bathroom mirror and Sukuna standing behind you with his hands all over your body. His sneer, his mocking laugh. The helplessness you felt. The humiliation of cumming against your will and getting taunted for it.
Sukuna broke you that night. And maybe you would have stayed there on the bathroom floor lying in a puddle of squirt and cum after he was finished with you, waiting for someone to walk in and find you. But there was one thought that kept repeating in your mind over and over again: Yuuji must never find out!
You knew he would blame himself for what his brother had done to you out of jealousy.
And so you scrambled to your feet and hastily cleaned yourself before you stumbled back to the party with a fake smile plastered onto your face. When you spotted Yuuji in the hallway, all your instincts screamed at you to run the other way. He looked too much like his brother.
But you forced yourself to stay and smile as he walked towards you and smiled that big sunshine smile and pulled you into his strong arms.
"Cutie! I was wondering where you went. Did you meet some friends? Oh, why are your clothes wet?"
You forced yourself to lie to him when his gaze trailed over you with a worried expression on his pretty face.
"Oh, I knocked into someone, and she accidentally poured her drink over me. It's ok, baby, don't worry."
You forced yourself to go home with him after the party and sleep in his arms. Arms that felt exactly like the ones that had held you captive.
And since that night, you keep forcing yourself to act like everything is fine. You do it to protect Yuuji from a knowledge that will hurt him.
It's been three days since the party. Three days since you met the evil twin. And the shame and disgust still cling to you.
And the fact that the man who did this to you has the same face as your boyfriend makes this whole thing even more fucked up. Anytime you look at Yuuji, you now also see his brother.
And another thing bothers you: Yuuji lied to you.
You remember your first date very clearly. The typical small talk the two of you exchanged to get to know each other. What are your hobbies? What is your favorite color? Do you have any siblings?
You remember loud and clear that Yuuji said he has no siblings.
You are currently sitting on Yuuji's bed, watching a movie, but all you can do is stare at his side profile, watching him with narrowed eyes. Was it a misunderstanding? You can't stop yourself from blurting out,
"Yuuji? Do you have a brother?"
"Huh?"
Big golden eyes blink at you in surprise, and Yuuji shakes his head,
"I only have my grandpa. Didn't I tell you?"
Your heart is beating too fast. He is doing it again!
"I thought maybe you have a sibling who lives somewhere else....goes to college in another town or something, and you forgot to mention them."
"Oh, I see! But no. I am an only child."
He grins at you, that cute big boyish grin, and stretches, causing his hoodie to ride up and expose some of his firm tan abs before he laughs softly and lunges towards you to wrap you in his strong arms and pull you into one of his bear hugs.
You feel irritation well up in you. Why is he lying to you? Yuuji is such a sweet guy. Always smiling, always helping others, always so sweet and fun to be around. He always seems so genuine. And yet. He is keeping a dark secret from everyone. But why?
Is he worried you will leave him if you find out there is another guy who looks like Yuuji but is a violent and cruel sadist? You blink. Maybe that is it.
It must be hell for Yuuji to have a twin like that. Sukuna said he is the family curse. Now that you think about it, you realize that this is true. He is Yuuji's curse. Anytime Yuuji looks in the mirror, he sees the face of his evil twin. No wonder he doesn't want to talk about Sukuna! No wonder he moved far away from his hometown to attend college here!
But what was Sukuna doing at that party? Did he travel here to visit his brother and then see the two of you at the party? Is he gone again now? Or is he still somewhere near? Is he lurking in the shadows? Is he watching his brother's every move?
You gulp hard. It scares you to think Sukuna might be here, stalking you and Yuuji.
Instinctively, you snuggle closer to your boyfriend, seeking comfort, seeking his protection. And Yuuji reacts to it immediately, cuddling you tightly and pressing a tender kiss to your forehead, sighing softly before he tells you how happy he is to have you and how much he loves you. His lips find yours and kiss you sweetly before they wander down your body, kissing, licking oh so tenderly, the complete opposite of his brother's touch.
Your anger at him has dissipated. Yuuji is a victim, too, cursed with a twin like Sukuna. And so you let Yuuji touch you. You caress his soft pink hair and moan his name as you spread your legs for him willingly when he asks you in that sweet, low voice if he can please eat you out.
And when he is lying on top of you later that night, fucking you into the mattress with deep but loving thrusts, you find yourself digging your nails into the buff muscles of his back, clinging to him, scratching his skin, as if you want to make sure he will never leave again.
You need him here with you. As long as Yuuji is here, you are safe from Sukuna. You wrap your legs tightly around his hips, arching your back to meet his horny thrusts, begging him for a second round, begging him to fuck you again and again and stay inside you all night.
He doesn't know it, but you need him to claim you back. You need the good twin to overwrite what the evil twin did to you.
You feel guilty the next morning when Yuuji gets up and stands before the bed with his back to you, and you see the deep red scratches your nails left on his muscular back.
But he just shrugs and grins that cute sheepish grin at you,
"Don't worry, cutie. It doesn't hurt, and I really loved how you didn't want to let go of me. That was so cute! I love knowing that I made my girl feel good."
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It's party time again on Saturday, but you go there with an uneasy feeling. You cannot stop the shudder running down your back. You cannot stop your gaze from wandering restlessly through the room, watching, waiting, worrying.
Is Sukuna somewhere near?
You cling to Yuuji desperately, holding his hand the whole time, hugging him, burying your face in his broad chest, unwilling to let go.
He thinks it's cute that you are so clingy and kisses you sweetly, smiling at you so innocent and sweet. It breaks your heart. You need to protect this smile, this innocence.
You realize with horror that Sukuna isn't just Yuuji's dark secret anymore. He is also yours.
He managed to force his way into your life, into your relationship, into your body, and into your mind.
Yuuji gently pries his hand out of your grasp, smiling apologetically before he presses a gentle kiss to your cheek and tells you that he has to use the bathroom real quick.
"I'll be back in a second, cutie!"
You feel like an idiot at how terrified you feel when your boyfriend leaves the room. You stare after him, watching him make his way through the crowd, taller than most of them, his pink hair standing out. Your gaze stays glued to that flash of pink, watching him walk further and further away from you, and with him, the safety you felt leaves you too.
You grab the cold bottle of coke from the table next to you, holding on to it as if it is your lifeline. You feel your breath speed up, and your hands cramp from how tightly you clutch the bottle while your gaze is fixed on the open doorway, heart hammering fearfully in your chest as you count the seconds waiting for Yuuji to come back. This time, you won't leave your spot. You won't wander around alone.
A flash of pink appears in the doorway, and you slump against the wall as a relieved smile lifts your lips. Until your mind provides a disturbing thought. Is that Yuuji? Or is that the wrong twin? How can you be sure this is Yuuji and not Sukuna, who is walking towards you? Isn't that gaze too devilish? Isn't that a smirk instead of a smile?
The relief you felt a moment ago is replaced by panic. Your heart is racing, your vision dancing with black spots. The bottle you were clutching so desperately slips out of your hand and lands on the floor.
You are frozen in place, watching an Itadori twin walk toward you without knowing which one it is. You stare at him like a deer trapped in the headlights, eyes wide, heart hammering wildly.
But then he blinks, and his lips lift in the typical broad smile. You can hear his happy laughter, even across the loud mix of voices.
You exhale loudly and shake your head to clear your thoughts. Stupid. You are so stupid! Of course, this is Yuuji! You curse yourself for being so paranoid and confusing your sweet, loving boyfriend with his evil twin.
Yuuji reaches you and leans down to peck your lips sweetly. He pulls away, and worry washes over his handsome face.
"Are you ok, baby? You look a bit sick. Do you need some cold water? Or some fresh air? Do you want us to leave?"
You smile at him weakly, shaking your head, still feeling shaken but refusing to let the memory of Sukuna ruin your evening.
"No, I'm fine, baby."
You step closer and wrap your arms around him, getting on your tiptoes to kiss him deeply, trying to chase every trace of his twin away. You just have to keep kissing Yuuji. When he kisses you, you know who he is. You know that this is the right twin. That this is your sweet Yuuji.
Your left foot steps in the small puddle of coke, soaking through the canvas of your Converse, dampening your sock uncomfortably, but your lips keep moving against Yuuji's desperately.
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You spend the night at Yuuji's, falling asleep in his strong arms, spooned by his warm buff body, finally feeling at ease here in his bed with his body pressing so reassuringly against your back.
But your dreams aren't that comforting.
You dream of a black hallway with hundreds of mirrors lining its walls. On the other end of the hallway stand two men. They both have the same pink hair and undercut. They have the same face and the same build. And they watch you with the same eyes as they both lift a hand, reaching out for you, silently beckoning you over. Come here, come to your boyfriend.
You wake up with a gasp. The red neon digits on the alarm clock tell you it's still the middle of the night. Yuuji's strong arms are still wrapped around you, his body is still pressing against your back, his warm breath is on your neck.
Warm lips close around your skin and suck. You moan softly, pushing your ass against the warm body behind you, rubbing it over the growing bulge in those boxer briefs. Maybe a good fuck with Yuuji will chase away the lingering uneasiness from the bad dream.
The lips on your neck become bolder, sucking roughly on your skin. The arms around you tighten, making you squeak because it's painful. Large, strong hands dig firmly into the soft flesh of your belly.
Your eyes widen, your body turning rigid as fear crashes over you. Cold dread fills your every fiber as you realize this isn't Yuuji behind you.
"Missed me, brat?"
Sukuna's low, mocking laugh fills your ears, and you spiral into the dark again. You tumble from one nightmare into the next. But this time, you can't wake up from it.
How did Sukuna get into Yuuji's apartment? Does he have a key? Or did he break in? And most importantly...
"Wh.. where is Yuuji?"
Sukuna's nails dig painfully into your skin. His voice sounds rough, angry,
"I don't like it when you talk about him while I am with you! You have no manners, brat!"
His hands grab your tits firmly, kneading them roughly through Yuuji's shirt that you wear for the night. The huge hard bulge of his erect cock is rutting firmly against you, letting you know what he will do to you.
And you know there is no escape.
You are once again trapped in the evil twin's arms. You cannot run from him, and you can't even scream, or you will alert Yuuji. Yuuji, who is probably in the kitchen or bathroom, and if he comes in here and sees you with his twin... You must protect him! He must not know!
And that leaves you here in the arms of this monster.
Sukuna shoves one hand under your shirt, groping your tits roughly, squeezing them possessively, and pinching your nipples between his fingers until they sting from a mix of pain and pleasure.
His other hand pushes between your thighs, forcing them apart so he can yank your panties to the side and expose your pussy to him, giving it a mean, hard slap from behind that makes you gasp.
Sukuna's mocking laughter fills your ear.
"Gotta remind that pathetic little cunt again what it feels like to get fucked right."
His unrelenting fingers slip between your pussy lips and push inside you, making tears well up in your eyes. Sukuna doesn't give you time to adjust but starts fingering you instantly, fucking you with two long fingers, hard and fast, making your whole body tremble from fear and pleasure. To your horror, you can hear the filthy squelching noises of your wet cunt, creaming up against your will.
"Oh, do you hear that? Your slutty little cunt is weeping for me. You thought about my cock every day, didn't you? Don't be shy, tell me all about it, slut! Tell me how much you missed getting fucked by me!"
Against your better judgment, you try to beg for his mercy,
"S...Sukuna, please just stop..."
A long finger curls brutally inside your cunt, pressing against your g-spot and massaging it with firm, rough circles, making your thighs press together and your body shake.
"Uh uh, what did I tell you?"
Of course, you should have known there is no mercy in him. You know his game by now, know what he wants. Sukuna fingers you brutally, torturing your g-spot, laughing when your hips jerk uncontrollably. Your resistance breaks, and you sob softly as tears of shame run down your face, and you tell him what he wants to hear,
"I'm sorry... I missed your cock so much, Sukuna. Please fuck me. Please let me cum on your cock again."
He laughs, opening his mouth and letting his canines graze over your neck,
"Bet you thought about me anytime my brother fucked you. A naughty cunt like yours isn't satisfied with a guy like my brother. You cheating little slut need my cock to fuck you right."
Your breath hitches, and your body goes rigid because you know what will come when Sukuna pulls his fingers out of you.
For a moment, your pussy flutters around nothing, but then Sukuna rams his thick hard cock deep into your wet heat, impaling you on his fat length with one brutal thrust.
Long fingers get shoved into your mouth, stuffing it with them, muffling your cries, filling your mouth with the taste of your own juices. You choke around them, but Sukuna just presses them firmer into your mouth, forcing you to take him from two sides, stuffing your cunt and your mouth as he uses you for his sick pleasure.
He humps you like a rabid animal, fucks you with brutal hard snaps of his hips while he groans in your ear, voice filled with glee and arousal,
"Ah yeah, that feels good. My brother fucked that little cunt so often that it molded to our cocks. You're such a dirty little cock slut, so insatiable, huh? Wanting every Itadori dick to fuck you stupid. Good thing you have two of us to fuck that greedy cunt."
His pace is brutal and unrelenting. His fat mushroom head hammers against your g-spot, torturing you with his cock, making your body react to the stimulation against your will, pussy creaming up for him, body jerking from pleasure in his violent hold.
Sukuna growls in your ear as one large hand grabs your wet pussy, keeping you in place, pulling you back against him. You keen around his fingers when he pinches your swollen clit meanly between two fingers, making your hips buck wildly.
"Take my cock, you slut!"
His taut balls slap heavily against your cunt with every rough thrust. Sukuna's fat cockhead is pressed against your g-spot, hitting it brutally, while his fingers attack your clit with rough strokes, rubbing hard, fast circles around it.
It's too much, too intense. The pleasure is hot and red, making your whole body jerk uncontrollably as you cry and sob around Sukuna's fingers. Your cunt shudders and pulses hotly around his brutal cock.
Heat floods your body as an intense orgasm gets forced out of you. Hot and wild, making you cum so hard that you think you will black out from it.
Your body is shaking from the intensity of your orgasm, pussy twitching hard around Sukuna's fat cock, which doesn't go unnoticed by him, of course,
"You little slut. Milking my cock so eagerly. You want more, huh? Want my cum this time? Was the greedy little cockslut sad that I didn't fuck her full last time, hm? Want to have your pussy fucked full like a big girl? Yeah, tonight you're gonna take my cum. I'm gonna fuck that greedy cunt full of it."
He growls, wrapping his arms around you and manhandling you into another position, on your belly, your face pressed into the pillow as Sukuna mounts you from behind. One of his hands is in your hair, grabbing it painfully and pushing your face down, keeping you firmly in place. But you couldn't go anywhere anyways. Not with his heavy body on top of you, fucking you brutally into the mattress.
He fucks his cock into your tight heat with erratic wild thrusts, giving himself over to pure primal need, punishing you with every hard thrust, chasing his orgasm with rough horny thrusts until you feel him cum in you, flooding your pussy with his hot seed.
"Yeah, take all of it, you greedy slut! I hope you get pregnant and have to carry my brat!"
He groans and growls as he leans down, cock still deep in your pussy, as if he wants to plug you up. His voice is amused when his lips brush over your ear,
"Now say thank you, you little slut."
You sob softly, hiding your face in the pillow, crying from the humiliation you feel as you mumble,
"Th... Thank you..."
But Sukuna's fingers twist painfully in your hair and yank your head up, forcing you to look at his sneering face. You hiccup as you stare at him with wide, tear-stained eyes. His mocking smirk looks even more evil here in the dim red glow of the alarm clock's light.
"Where are your manners, brat? Look at me while you thank me."
You sob weakly but force yourself to do as he commands,
"Th.. thank you, Sukuna. Thank you for f... fucking me.. and for g... giving me your cum."
He chuckles at your words, a sound full of mocking and triumph. One of his large hands grabs your chin, strong fingers pressing into your skin as he leans closer to lick over your cheek, licking up your hot tears,
"See, you can be a good girl if you want. It's a shame that I have to leave already, but my brother will be back any second now. 'Til next time, princess. Can't wait to make you cry with my cock again."
He leaves you lying there, pussy throbbing and full of his cum. You feel dirty, debauched, crying softly into the pillow.
You hate Sukuna so much, and you hate yourself, you hate your body, for reacting that way to him. How can you do this to Yuuji? Cumming on his brother's cock right here in Yuuji's bed? Lying here with your pussy filled to the brim with Sukuna's cum, while sweet Yuuji has no clue. Maybe Sukuna is right, and you are really a slut.
The door opens, and your body goes rigid. Which brother is it now? Sukuna or Yuuji? Somehow, both options sound terrifying at the moment. You are scared of Sukuna, but you feel guilty when you think of Yuuji.
You hastily wipe your tears off and force yourself to calm your breathing as you roll onto your side, pretending to be asleep.
The heavy weight of an Itadori man makes the mattress dip as he gets in bed behind you. You gulp hard. You don't dare breathe as a pair of muscular arms slips around you and a warm, buff body presses against your back.
But then a soft kiss is breathed on your neck, and a happy sigh exhaled against your ear.
Yuuji.
Sweet, strong Yuuji.
You snuggle against his buff body instinctively, needing him, needing his love and strength, even while you are drowning in shame and guilt.
Yuuji chuckles happily,
"Aww, hey, cutie, did I wake you up? I'm so sorry. I got hungry and had to make a sandwich. Come here. I'll cuddle you so my princess can sleep again. Or maybe we can do something else that will make you sleepy..."
His voice turns into a low, raspy whisper, making your pussy flutter even in this situation, as if you are conditioned to react with arousal to the sexy sound of his voice when he gets horny.
Yuuji's strong, muscular arms tighten around you as he nuzzles his face against your neck. You can feel his smile, and it makes things better and worse at the same time.
The guilt makes you feel sick. Here you are, lying in your sweet and loving boyfriend's arms, with your pussy still leaking his brother's cum.
Yuuji's lips trail tender kisses up and down your neck while he hums softly, oblivious to your inner turmoil. His large hands start wandering over your body. But it's such a different touch from Sukuna's. Yuuji's hands are gentle, loving when they slip under the old t-shirt he gave you, caressing your tits sweetly, circling your nipples tenderly until they are stiff and pleasure throbs in your lower belly.
Yuuji moans softly against your skin,
"I love you, baby. You feel so soft and sweet. I wanna spoil my pretty girl."
You can feel his fat cock hardening and pressing hotly against your ass through his boxers, so needy for you. But Yuuji is sweet about it, not demanding, not aggressive. He slips a hand into your panties to lovingly caress your clit with gentle slow flicks, pampering your pussy with his tender caresses.
Your head is spinning, lust pulsing hotly in your clit, making you spread your legs eagerly for Yuuji, pushing your throbbing cunt needily against his loving fingers, wanting to feel him, wanting him to chase away every trace of his brother.
He moans loudly when he feels more of your hot wet cunt, voice so sweet and sexy,
"Fuck, cutie. You are already so wet. That's so hot."
And your eyes fill with tears. You are choking on the guilt and shame. Knowing that most of the wetness is from the orgasm, Sukuna forced out of you and from his cum that's seeping out of you and coating your pussy lips so obscenely.
Suddenly, you see red. You can't take it anymore. You can't just lie here and spread your legs and let Yuuji pamper you as if you deserve it. As if everything is ok.
Nothing is ok! And it's all because of that monster, Sukuna! You hate him! You hate him for doing this to you and to his brother! You hate him for driving this wedge between you and Yuuji! But you won't let him destroy what you and Yuuji have! You won't let him win! Yuuji is the only Itadori brother you want to belong to, and you will prove it tonight!
You turn around in Yuuji's arms, making him gasp in surprise when you attack his lips with a fierce kiss, your hands running roughly through his pink hair, tugging on it and biting his bottom lip as you moan his name.
"Yuuji... I want to fuck, you baby. Let me ride you."
He moans in answer and rolls onto his back, pulling you with him eagerly while he licks into your mouth. You climb on top of him, straddling his lap, taking his fat cock in your hand and giving it slow, firm strokes that make him throw his head back and moan loudly.
Your mouth falls open as you watch him in the dim light. He looks just like his brother, just like Sukuna, but the difference is that you are the one in control now. 
Yuuji is just as strong as Sukuna. He could manhandle you and use you just like his twin, but he isn't like that. He is so sweet for you, such a good boy, obediently giving himself to you. You are the one who can do anything you want with him.
It sends a thrill through you, making your skin tingle with excitement and pleasure.
You are breathing heavily, grunting and gasping, lost in a feral need. You hastily pull your soaked panties to the side, not bothering to take them off, too lost in this primal need to get your man's cock into your wet needy cunt.
Yuuji moans loudly when you bring his fat mushroom tip to your puffy wet clit, rubbing it against your little bud, using Yuuji's cock to pleasure you.
Hot waves of pleasure shoot through your whole body, your clit pulsing hotly as you rub it against Yuuji, almost in a frenzy now in your need to fuck him and fuck every thought of Sukuna away.
You feel exhilarated by the power you have. Rubbing your wet messy pussy over Yuuji's twitching fat cock, hearing him moan and gasp. You're teasing his fat cock, basking in what you can do to him, how you can reduce an Itadori brother to a whimpering needy mess.
You watch that pretty face as he moans and whimpers, so openly showing you his pleasure. So submissive and good for you. His lips open in a loud, strangled moan, and then he starts begging you,
"Fuck... ah ah baby! Oh, cutie, please fuck me. Fuck me, baby, please. I need you, please wanna feel you. Please let me feel your pretty pussy around my cock!"
Your cunt is twitching hornily at his words. The power surge almost makes you cum all over Yuuji's swollen tip. But you need more. You need all of him. You finally sink down on his fat length, taking him in you in one eager motion until you sit completely on Yuuji's muscular thighs, his cock buried all the way in you, and your feral groan fills the small bedroom.
You feel dizzy with lust, dizzy with power, unable to hold back now that your boyfriend's cock kisses your g-spot and fills you so fully. You cry out softly, cumming just from sitting on Yuuji's fat cock.
You dig your nails into his buff pecs as you let him feel your pussy twitch around his cock, watching his pretty eyes roll back when he feels your orgasm around his cock.
"Yuuji! Ah, baby, you feel that? That's what you do to me, baby! I love you so much! I love you and your pretty cock, oh god!"
Sukuna could never do this to you! He can break and humiliate you, force you to cum on his cock. But he can never make you want him! You clench your teeth, not giving yourself or Yuuji a break, and start bucking your hips against him, riding his cock eagerly.
Soon you are bouncing wildly on Yuuji's fat cock with your head thrown back, moaning and screaming his name as you ride him hard, not holding back. And he lets you use him, lets you fuck him while his large hands knead your ass. His hips buck needily fucking his cock even deeper into you, so eager, so horny. And so sweet with his loud, needy moans and mewls, with his moaned love confessions and sweet praises.
Your sweet Yuuji.
He doesn't know he is fucking his brother's cum deeper into you with each deep horny thrust of his cock. He doesn't know he is mixing two Itadori seeds in your greedy pussy when he cums with a loud cry and fills you to the brim with his hot seed.
You won't let Sukuna win! You won't let him spoil what you have with Yuuji! Yuuji is the one you love. Yuuji is the one who deserves to cum in you and who deserves your pussy, and who deserves your orgasms. You will give him that! You will be his girl! You will fuck him even harder and cum even more for him than you do for his brother!
You moan Yuuji's name, not stopping but going for another orgasm, smiling when Yuuji lets you, even though he is mewling from how overstimulated his cock is.
And you slide up and down on him feverishly, letting his fat girth drag over your swollen clit until the pleasure peaks again and you feel your next orgasm wash over you in hot waves.
And this time, you finally squirt on him, feeling your hot creamy wetness gush over Yuuji's fat cock and his heavy balls, giving him your all.
He moans loudly when he feels it, his large hands kneading your ass firmly, guiding you up and down on his cock, letting you cum and cum and cum.
"Fuck, baby!! Yeah, make a mess on me, cutie. Fuck!"
Your pussy is overstimulated and puffy from how hard you fucked yourself on Yuuji's gorgeous cock. But you don't stop but keep riding him wildly. It's messy, slippery, and wet from your combined fluids, your cream and squirt, and Yuuji's hot cum that is seeping out of your cunt.
But you need more! You are in a frenzy, driven by the urge to cum on him again and again, making sure Sukuna loses this fucking game!
Yuuji is mewling under you, overstimulated, but letting you use him regardless, so eager to give you pleasure. And you ride yourself to orgasm after orgasm on his gorgeous fat cock, while moaning and screaming his name over and over again.
"Fuck! Yuujiii! Yes yes!! You're gonna make me squirt again, baby!"
You almost black out when the next orgasm rips through you. Your body is shaking uncontrollably, so weak that you just slump on Yuuji's lap, moaning even louder when his fat tip presses even firmer against your g-spot.
But Yuuji's strong hands catch you and hold you, lifting you up and down on his fat cock, letting you ride your orgasm out on him, his golden eyes watching the spot where your pussy and his cock are connected. The spot where you squirt all over him again, making a sticky mess on his cock and his abs, showing him how good his cock makes you feel.
"Yes! Yes! Oh, Yuuji!! Oh, baby!! I love you! No one could ever fuck me as good as you!"
I hope you are still here somewhere, Sukuna. I hope you hear me fuck your brother and how much I love it. I hope you hear me scream his name like I will never scream yours.
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You spend the following week being a clingy girlfriend to Yuuji. Always hugging him, always snuggling against him, following him from room to room. He notices it but doesn't mind. He wears a bright, sunny smile on his pretty face, happy that his girl loves him so much. And he moans so sweetly for you when you keep him up every night for hours, fucking him almost desperately until the bed is a mess from your combined cum.
You try to keep Sukuna away by always being by Yuuji's side, telling yourself that the evil twin will not dare approach you while his brother is by your side. 
But it is hard at times.
Yuuji, Sukuna. Sukuna, Yuuji. They look the same, and it fucks with your mind. Sometimes, you get scared. Sometimes, you think Yuuji's fingers dig too firmly into your flesh. Sometimes, you think he is smirking at you. Sometimes you shudder when he fucks you from behind with hard, fast thrusts, and his low voice growls in your ear, sounding too similar to his brother.
You hate that the evil twin has that effect on you. That Sukuna somehow always seems to be with you, even when you are with Yuuji. But you have to make the best of this. You will love and fuck Yuuji even harder. You will spend even more time with him. Maybe this way, you can chase Sukuna completely away from your mind.
Maybe after college, you and Yuuji can move far away, making sure Sukuna will never find you again.
An old friend of Yuuji visits for the weekend. A guy with tousled black hair and dark blue eyes who watches his surroundings with a cool, intelligent gaze.
Fushiguro Megumi. He grew up with Yuuji. Went to school with him. They played together as little kids.
You wait until you are alone with him before you ask,
"Megumi?"
"Yeah?"
"Have you ever met Yuuji's twin brother, Sukuna?"
Megumi's head whips around, and he frowns at you. His gaze is surprisingly hostile. Blue eyes narrow as he looks at you and answers in a cold voice,
"What do you mean? What sick game are you playing? Of course, I haven't met him. Sukuna died in the womb! Yuuji consumed his brother before he could be born. It's something that bothers him a lot. That's why he doesn't talk about it!"
The world around you seems to crumble away. You stare at Megumi, eyes wide, fingers tingling. For a long moment, a heavy silence fills the room. And then hysterical laughter bubbles out of your mouth. You can feel your mouth lift, stretching your cheeks in a horribly grotesque shape as your loud, hysterical laughter carries through the apartment, sounding shrill and insane.
And deep inside Yuuji, his evil twin throws his head back and laughs, too.
Do you understand it now, you stupid girl? There is no running from me. He is I, and I am he.
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Thank you so much for reading the last part of "Brother"!! I hope you enjoyed it!! I had a lot of fun planning and writing this story. I love the horror elements, and I hope it could give you an uneasy feeling too lmaooo. It's so terrifying to me to imagine that the guy you love has the same face as the guy who does all those horrible things to you.
And how did you like the ending?? Ahhahaa, I am laughing with Sukuna. So much for running away together with Yuuji to escape his evil twin ;)
The smut part with Yuuji affected me A LOT. I hope my fellow Yuuji lovers had a feast with this!!
I hope you enjoyed this horror mini-series! Thank you so much for reading! Comments and reblogs would be sweet.
2K notes · View notes
fairyofhee · 6 months
Text
no one compares.
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PAIRING. fuck buddy!heeseung x afab!reader
SYNOPSIS. You both thought that having no rules with a fuck buddy would make things simple, because it was just sex. But it was all conflicting when no one compares to each other after sleeping with someone else.
WARNING. angst if you squint, contains smut! MINORS DNI. fingering, handjob, creampie, unprotected sex. 4k words.
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FORTY EIGHT HOURS LATER
You woke with pure feelings of guilt and regret, watching the boy leave with the scent of you. It’s dumb, you didn’t meant to sleep with him. Well, you did, but you had a hard time admitting it. 
Heeseung texted you two days ago that he slept with someone else, so you did the same. 
Your fuck buddy Heeseung was on vacation for three weeks, which was the longest time you’ve been away from each other. Although you used each other for sex or it was more so, a friends with benefits situation, there were no set rules. 
Meaning, that you weren’t exclusive, which also meant that seeing other people wasn’t a problem.
When Heeseung texted you that he fucked someone else, you were surprisingly shocked. The information caused a weird feeling in your chest. It was the first time either of you had slept with someone else, but it wasn’t a problem, right?
It wasn’t a big deal, you told yourself. And so, if Heeseung can sleep with someone who wasn’t you, you were allowed to do the same. You slept with your friend, Jay, who also happened to be Heeseung’s best friend.
It wasn’t supposed to happen, but Jay came over last night and one thing led to another. He spent the night and slept in your bed — in the same spot that Heeseung usually does, and left this morning smelling like you.
You both agreed that it was a one time thing, and you heavily emphasized that it was because Jay usually wasn’t someone you turn to for sex.
Heeseung returned from his vacation trip today and wanted to come over tonight to see you. Of course you accepted his self invitation, since it’s been three weeks from being apart. But you were anxious to see him, the inner dilemma in your head haunting you since last night. 
You debated on whether or not, telling him that you slept with Jay. Heeseung needed to know you thought, because he admitted to also fucking someone else. It was all confusing though, he didn’t need to tell you. Did he think that you deserved to know? You weren’t exclusive after all.
You made a rational decision. If the topic of other people was brought up in conversation then you were going to tell him. There are no rules when it comes to you both so it’s not important. 
“Hi,” says the boy outside your apartment, leaning on the door with a smug look on his face.
The sight of him leaves you instinctively smiling. His hair grew out a bit, a strand of hair fell to his forehead, and his skin was now close to honey. He looked so pretty and the smile on his face that you so missed caused your heart to swell. 
“Can I come inside?” He interrupted your thoughts as he chuckled.
You repeatedly nodded as you let the boy in before watching him take distinct steps closer. 
“I missed you,” he says. You feel his hot breath fan on your face as you return his long stare, all while contemplating your next move. Suddenly, you pull him even closer and attack his lips, feeling both of his hands cupping your entire face.
Everything happens so fast when you’re dragging him inside your bedroom. Your arms were hooked and wrapped tightly around Heeseung’s neck before he slips a hand underneath your pants and inside your panties, feeling how wet you were. 
“My pretty girl missed me this much?” Heeseung teases his fingers along your entrance, locking his dark and lustful eyes into yours. 
All you could do was let out a groan, unable to control the way your body reacted to him. He begins to push a finger inside you and kiss your burning cheeks, watching your face contort with pleasure and your lips parting in a silent moan.
“Baby, you are quiet today,” Heeseung says before adding another finger and curving them to hit the sweet spot inside you. He’s just starting to touch you, but you feel yourself already close. You also notice his own arousal physically growing. 
“I need you, Hee,” you slipped a hand inside his sweatpants to feel his tent. “I need you too,” he whined, starting to pump his fingers in and out of you until his movements shortly become more erratic when he’s circling your clit.
You reach inside his boxers and wrap your hand around his hard cock to stroke him, feeling his precum leaking out. Heeseung’s mouth quickly opens to let out a moan when you’re moving your hand up and down. His cock soon twitches after rubbing his slit with your thumb.
The air began to feel heavy as you both touched each other, missing how each other felt. It was a matter of a few seconds until you could feel your release, and it was becoming a bit overwhelming when Heeseung starts to kiss your neck. 
He continues to place his mouth on your skin until you feel him stop and completely pull away.
“Who’s this from?” He says and you freeze, pursing your lips while following his hands that were on your neck. You shrugged in silence for a moment, realizing that Heeseung is rubbing the hickey that Jay left on your neck last night. 
“It’s from someone,” you hesitated to say while feeling conflicted, until you made the decision to admit who it was specifically from. “It’s from Jay.”
Confusion crossed his face, “Jay?” He questioned as he removed his stare at the fresh mark on your skin before meeting your eyes with a hard blink. 
“He was just being a good friend.”
Heeseung scoffed, “A friend like me?” A cunning smile adorned his lips. “Did you sleep with him because of what I did?”
“What? No,” you shook your head and Heeseung didn't speak, but met you in silence. A dry laugh escaped your lips which quickly died out as you took a deep breath. “I mean, it was difficult waiting for you to come back so Jay was there. It seems like it was hard for you to wait too, no?”
Heeseung relaxed his tense shoulders, “Yeah. Since we’re not exclusive,” he pointed out.
“Exactly,” you tried to smile. 
The tension in the air thickened and instead of acknowledging it, you nudged your nose against his before kissing him softly. “I missed you a lot,” your voice was laced with lust and desire. 
“I know,” he replies while hovering over you until you lied flat, “Let me make you feel good.”
“Let me be on top,” you demanded as you grabbed the hem of his shirt to remove it.
Heeseung shakes his head and lets out a deep laugh, “You don’t deserve it.”
“Why not?” You question before pausing. You were in the middle of removing your shirt and unclasping your bra until you halted due to his response. “Because I fucked someone else?”
“I didn’t even mention anything about that.”
You scoffed hard, “You’re thinking it.”
"And you're ruining the mood," He sneered before grabbing your breast to hungrily leave kisses, the feeling causing a loud groan to leave your lips. Your sounds encourage him to place his tongue to your nipple before he sucks hard with his mouth.
Heeseung wastes no time grabbing your whole body with an arm so that you're faced down with your ass up, feeling how hard he is when you're pressed against him. “I’m gonna fuck you first then you can do whatever you want to me.”
You bury yourself into your bedsheets, impatiently waiting after giving a nod of approval. Heeseung plants a kiss on your back before grabbing the band of your panties to quickly slip them off and to spread your wetness.
“Take out your cock already,” you urged, feeling Heeseung’s clothed cock that you just jerked off a few moments ago, pressed up behind you as he begins to rub slow circles onto your clit.
“Don’t be a brat or I’ll treat you like one,” he says, starting to strip off his sweatpants by untying the strings, his boxers followed by it — making your head turn back at the sight of how hard he is.
He takes his throbbing length in his hand that dripped with precum and began to stroke himself watching as you were the view in front of him. You watched the corners of Heeseung’s lips twitch upwards when he notices the way your legs were spreading wider. 
“Hee, I can’t wait any longer,” you whined out.
Heeseung acknowledged the patience that you didn’t have. He took his cock to your folds and mixed your wetness and his precum, making you clench when he wasn't inside you yet. He gives you no warning when he inserts himself, the harsh sting of the stretch was something that you missed over the past three weeks.
He slips his length out and slams inside once more, a loud moan leaving both of your mouths at the sensation. “You’re tight,” he murmurs in a deep tone, “Did he not stretch you out enough?”
You grip the sheets tightly, having a bit of trouble speaking due to the adjustment of his big cock. “S-Stop talking about him,” you plead. 
He laughs at your response before gripping your waist with a hand to help himself slam in and out of your cunt, causing you to whimper at the intense feeling. You manage to compose yourself as he’s setting a fast pace, and you turn around to see his eyes closed and his head thrown back.
The sight of the smirk on his face with hair loosely falling onto his forehead causes you to uncontrollably clench and he curses your name.
Heeseung begins to roll his hips sensually and you take it as a sign to move yourself against him, so you quickly match his pace until he’s hitting your cervix. "Fuck, my cock was made to be inside you,” he lets out with a loud whimper.
“You have the best pussy,” Heeseung continues, the only sounds coming out of your room is your skin slapping against his and the moans from your lips. "Y-Your cock is the fucking best,” you cry out, causing him to twitch at your words.
“Shit- that’s right,” he mutters, tightening his grip on your hips when feeling your orgasm approaching before slipping out of you. The action causes you to turn your head, staring at the soft expression on his face with confusion.
Heeseung takes your hand and pulls you towards him until you were sitting on his lap. He inserts himself in you once again, leaving both of your mouths wide open with a deep exhale let out. 
“Fuck me,” he begs with his deep round eyes burning into you with desire, “Show me how much you missed me before you cum.”
Your cheeks were flushed as he begged, and you soon attacked his lips to start fulfilling his demands. He helped your body to move in and out of his cock before allowing you to take over. With your fingers tangled in his hair, you begin to roll your hips slowly before increasing the pace.
“Go faster,” Heeseung pleaded with his hands on your hips, holding himself back from thrusting upwards. You shake your head, continuing the same pace you were previously moving at.
“Let me fuck you how I want, Hee,” You whined. “I-I’ll make you cum soon, just be patient for me.”
You start to move your hips in slow languid circles as Heeseung nods, his hands moving up to fondle your breasts and graze your hard nipples.
You then start to bounce up and down on him, making Heeseung breathe heavily. This was a chance to show how much your body was made for him, the chance to prove that there is no one else for him, you thought.
Your movements are increasingly becoming faster, giving the pleasure that he impatiently begged for as you feel his cock twitch inside you. The sound of your skin slapping against his thighs arouse you even more, helping you to chase your end. You desperately wanted to cum.
“You’re fucking me well,” Heeseung lets out, feeling your walls clamp around him, watching your face scrunch up and unable to hold it in any longer. With his grip on your waist, you manage not to fall and collapse on his chest.
You weren’t sure if you were going to last as long as he wanted. The pleasure was overwhelming and more than anything that you have ever felt before, but it felt so good — he felt so good. 
“Heeseung, oh my- fuck," you cry out, squeezing your eyes shut and clenching hard, his warm touch helping you to quickly release on him. 
Heeseung lets out an airy chuckle before moving his hips upward to thrust deep and hard as if a bruise would be there tomorrow. He’s enjoying the sensation until a loud moan leaves his mouth when he releases inside, his cum filling up your insides and quickly leaking out.
He rides his orgasm for a moment before you shortly raise your body so that he could pull out of you. You watched as his cum mixed with yours dripped out, the sight was something you also missed during these past three weeks.
Shortly, you both do the same routine after sex — catching your breaths, cleaning up, not expecting Heeseung to stay. Sometimes, you would wake up the next morning and he would be gone, but tonight, he decided to stay and sleep over.
You turn your body to exhaustingly lay on the bed after cleaning up, Heeseung then joins you to lay in his spot of your bed.
“You’re thinking about something,” Heeseung cuts the silence with his words, noticing you in deep thought as you stare at the ceiling.
There is something obviously bottling inside your head, but you choose to ignore it. You turn to look at him, and all he gives you is a pleading look.
“Just say it,” he urges.
A deep exhale was let out as you think about the outcome of your next words. What you’re thinking could possibly fuck things up, but you cautiously choose to let it out anyways.
“How did you feel when fucking that girl? Did it feel like you were with me?” Your voice anxiously rang, hoping he wasn’t going to get up and leave.
“No,” he laughs, “I regret it so much.”
Your face lit up in shock, “Why?”
“Because I was too busy thinking about you.”
Your mouth slightly parted, truly speechless as you felt your chest ache. And it wasn’t supposed to, since this is just your fuck buddy. But his words were all you needed before popping the question. It was something that you’ve been meaning to ask all along, but you were too afraid of stepping over unspoken boundaries and giving him the wrong idea that you weren’t even sure was entirely wrong anymore.
“Do you want to try being exclusive?” You quickly let out, “We can try for a little while and if you get bored, you can see other girls.”
As you wait for a response, Heeseung just smiles before speaking out. “I think we can do that.”
“But I don’t think anyone could compare to you.”
© fairyofhee 2023.
note — thank you for reading! please leave any thoughts or comments, reblogs and feedback is greatly appreciated!
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sporadicbeans82 · 28 days
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What Can't Be || Mapi León x Ingrid Engen x Reader (Part Two)
Part 1 || Part 3
Summary: You think you're in love with your ex-girlfriend, Mapi León. You also think you're in love with her current girlfriend. Both of them are your new teammates, and you must continue to bury your feelings for both women and prioritize your career... It's a little bit harder than you thought. What a mess.
Warnings: A swear word probably, a loooot of angsty pining, self-hatred, lack of sleep on the part of the Reader
Word count: 5.1k words
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Your first day at Barcelona was spent in a haze of confusion and exhaustion. You’d spent most of the night restlessly rolling over and over until you’d gotten up and out of bed early, at around three in the morning. 
You were two coffees into the day, and you felt like your eyes had been glued open but still fought to close. Your very being was exhausted, given that the turnover between your last match, moving homes, and attending your first training for Barcelona had been a solid three days. It probably wouldn’t have been quite as draining if you’d been able to sleep at night, but each night was much the same. 
You spent much of your time trying to sleep. You’d never had very many issues with the task before, so you weren’t quite sure why you couldn’t sleep now. You blamed it due to the stress which had compounded within your life in the last few days. 
“Hola!!” Someone cried out in greeting to you, and you glanced up. You wore a plain jumper and trousers, both of which you’d tugged on in the dark that morning. 
“Hola.” You greeted back, trying to remind yourself not to be nearly as grumpy as you felt. You forced a kinder smile onto your face, eyes drifting up to find one of the Barcelona players walking besides you. You recognized them to be Claudia Pina, and looked around for her partner in crime. Alas, Patri was nowhere to be found. 
Noticing the way you glanced around, Claudia puffed her cheeks out and gave you a cheesy grin. 
“Ella tenía un interview con La Reiiiinaaaaaaa!” Claudia rolled the R in “Reina” exaggeratedly, rolling her eyes playfully. You wondered if the younger girl was always like this, happy and joyful, and naturally funny. You hardly felt like you yourself could be like that, given the pit of dread which culminated in your stomach at the prospect of having to face two specific women who’d been haunting your very thoughts the past few days. 
As much as you yearned to make a great “first” impression on the Barcelona players, you could hardly think straight, both literally and metaphorically. Over the last few days, you’d attempted to get your muddled and confused thoughts in order, but found yourself unable to. 
You always ended up thinking too hard about Ingrid Engens’ kind, concerned eyes or her soft fingers against your skin. Or, you were drowning in memories of your time with Mapi so, so many years ago. It was the last thing that you’d needed at the time, given how big this club transfer was to you, but you couldn’t force yourself out of this cycle of thought. 
“Estás bien?” Claudia’s voice broke you out of your thoughts, which you were incredibly grateful for as the two of you began to enter the locker room. Walking down the hallway together, you nodded at the younger player.
“Yeah just… estoy en mi mente, cabeza? Stuck in my thoughts.” You didn’t know how much English Claudia knew, but you were even more unsure about your own Spanish. How one could go through a decade of Spanish teams knowing only minimal Spanish had and always would be a mystery to you.
Claudia just grinned at you, however, and you supposed that she probably knew a decent amount of English. You remembered seeing a video somewhere that focused on a day in the life with Mapi and… Ingrid. You’d never watched the video for obvious reasons, but you’d seen a few snippets of it on various apps. 
Just like that, your mind was stuck on the way that the two communicated. You remembered hearing Ingrids’ accented English and Mapi’s Spanish, responding to each other in a flurry of different languages. It reminded you of the way that you and Mapi had communicated when you had dated, with you understanding the Spanish that Mapi spoke but responding back in English. The thought made you insanely jealous, but dread washed over you as you couldn’t figure out which girl you were jealous of. 
It should have been easy. You should have wanted to be Ingrid, right? Because you had dated Mapi in the past, and you’d be lying if you said that feelings were not still there for the Spanish defender. However, your thoughts always seemed to catch on Ingrids’ hands and eyes and… the way she’d spoken to you, calm and collected when you were everything but. You were confused.
Walking into the locker room with Claudia didn’t help that confusion. Most of the team was already there, and many of the girls greeted you and Claudia by name. You did your best to acknowledge each greeting with one of your own.
However, catching sight of Ingrid and Mapi talking to each other quietly by one of their cubbies in a far corner of the room caused a thick feeling of anxiety to choke the words back into your throat. You tried not to stare at the other two, but as you were shown to your cubby, your eyes drifted upward to take them in. 
Both women wore their training gear, and Mapi was getting her boots on while Ingrid sat beside her. One of Ingrids’ hands had fallen onto Mapi’s knee, stroking at the freshly-healed scars there from Mapi’s most recent surgery. 
The two whispered quietly back and forth, planting kisses on each others’ cheeks. They were, as it stood, the very definition of “public display of affection” but nobody on the team seemed to mind. At Real Madrid, or any of the other teams that you’d been on, you would have gotten shit from your teammates for so much as holding hands with someone you were interested in. It seemed different here, warmer and softer. It was an atmosphere which allowed these types of interactions with your significant other in a quiet locker room, a safe place to show affection and love for each other. 
Moreover, it seemed more like Mapi was talking to Ingrid and the tall, black-haired woman was simply listening with a fond smile on her face. It was good to know that Mapi was still a yapper, to put it simply. 
Even when the two of you had dated, Mapi had constantly had something to say. Being the quieter of the two, you’d always been more than happy to listen to Mapi’s near-constant string of commentary, jokes, and quips… it had been one of your favorite things about your ex-girlfriend. The way which she could fill even the quietest of rooms with laughs and smiles had always been such a talent of Mapi’s, and the realization that you were no longer the recipient of her words, and hadn’t been for a long time, hurt. Of course, you’d known that since you’d broken off your relationship with the other woman, but seeing the way you were replaced as her partner in ways that used to be so special to you… you swore your heart cracked painfully even more.
As Mapi’s fingers finished tying her laces, she looked up. She caught your dazed gaze, and the two of you met eyes from across the room. The glance startled you into movement, before you could get stuck in her eyes as you had with Ingrids’.
You were quick to look back down, of course, busying yourself with getting your own training gear on as you tugged your jumper over your head and replaced it with the Barcelona top that had been given to you.
When you looked up again, the two were gone. You took your time gathering your stuff together and shoving it back into your cubby. You started to walk out towards the pitch, in the direction that you’d seen the majority of your team go, before you thought better of it.
You circled back to your cubby and turned towards it, taking a deep breath and trying to center yourself as you did so. You knew that this team was important to you, and this transfer was one that you couldn’t fuck up. You realized all too well that the feelings of confusion you had towards your ex-girlfriend and her current girlfriend were ones that very well could fuck everything up, and so you fought to bury them one last time.
Then, you turned right back around. You tried to hold your head up high and expel all of the negative, exhausted energy that had held you down for the last few days. Pushing all thoughts of Mapi and her girlfriend right out of your mind with it. 
Walking out onto the pitch, however, you could still feel the multiple sleepless nights weighing heavy on your shoulders. 
You knew you were fucked the second that Mapi looked up at you. Your eyes meeting a second time had you blushing and turning away before you could control your reaction. Internally, you screamed. You felt like a fool, and you knew that your reaction was a noticeable one by the way you saw Mapi furrow her brows at you from across the field. 
No matter how hard you tried to bury your feelings, they just kept bubbling up to the surface. You reminded yourself that what you had with Mapi was old news. What used to be, but was no longer. 
It didn’t work, and your heart sat cracked in your chest as you kept your head down through the rest of the warmups in order to avoid eye contact with the woman you knew you still loved. 
-----
Your mission to avoid eye contact with both Ingrid and Mapi lasted for an entire five minutes before you were paired with Ingrid for a drill. 
The drill had you pressing up against a ball and trying to run in a straight line to control a ball which was kicked towards you by a third partner. Due to the fact that Mapi was still restricted due to her recent meniscus injury, she was the partner who passed the ball towards either you or Ingrid. 
The three of you fell into your positions almost silently, but as you picked up the large rubber ball to place between you and the taller Norwegian, you dropped the ball. It simply slipped between your shaking fingers, and as you went to pick it up again, the ball dropped out from between your hands again as it rotated awkwardly in your grip.
Sighing exasperatedly, you stooped to try a third time, only to be intercepted by a firm arm across your chest. The arm stopped you from bending downwards, and you glanced over to meet Ingrids’ eyes. 
Like during the match, you swore you could have drowned in her eyes, and cursed yourself for the way your heart stammered in your chest. You felt your throat dry up, feeling so many emotions for such a simple interaction. A combination of your lack of sleep, your small crushes on the girls, and the way that you absolutely couldn’t have those feelings for the two Barcelona players was becoming nearly overwhelming in its intensity. 
You quickly redirected your gaze, backing up so that Ingrids’ arm was no longer pressed against you. If you hadn’t done that, you swore you could have crumpled right then and there. Instead, you retrained your eyes on Mapi, which wasn’t any better as the girl met your eyes with her own, seeming to have been watching you the entire time.
A part of you wanted to go up to Jona and tell him that you couldn’t do this. Even better, a part of you wanted to hightail it back to Real Madrid. You weren’t made for this– the pressure, the pain, and the extra feelings on the side. It wasn’t something that you were used to, and the usual methods that you had to cope with how you were feeling weren’t working. 
Seeming to sense an impending breakdown, you felt the rubber ball pressed against your side. Ingrids’ shove nearly sent you flying, but you managed to catch your footing in time. You heard her giggle, and the sound was so much softer than you anticipated. It reminded you of the birds which had used to sit outside your home in England, chirping away as the sun rose above the horizon. 
Suddenly, you felt like you would have done anything to hear the noise again. It wasn’t unlike the way you felt about Mapi talking. You would have made a fool out of yourself, traveled to the moon and back an infinite number of times, jumped and heaved mountains over your shoulders just to hear Mapi speak to you like you were more than just a stranger… or to hear Ingrid laugh. 
Here you were, falling further and further for both women. You hoped, rather stupidly, that one of the girls would catch you before you fell too far.
The sound, like everything else Ingrid seemed to do, soothed your frayed nerves as a small smile returned to your face. You pushed back against Ingrid with all of your might, and that was when Mapi kicked the ball towards the two of you.
You tried to stick your foot out while also trying to maintain your balance, and ended up falling sideways. You heard someone squawk before there was a weight on top of you, and you didn’t have to open your eyes to know that it was the person who you really shouldn’t want to be on top of you.
You tried not to pay attention to the way Ingrids’ hand was splayed across your stomach, or the way she smelled like… trees, but sweet. Like tree scented candles, maybe. Instead, you forced yourself to pay attention to her bony elbow, which was digging into your ribs from how she was laying.
You grunted, trying to roll the girl off, and she allowed you to push her off with another giggle.
There it was again, the laugh that could have lit up a million dark rooms. 
Ingrid got up to her knees, showing Mapi a thumbs up as the other girl had begun to make her way over to check on the both of you. Just like she’d done at the match, Ingrid offered you her hand, and you took it. Once again, you forced yourself to stop liking the way the girls’ skin felt against yours. 
As you climbed back to your feet, you tripped over your own laces and stumbled. You expected yourself to fall right back down to the ground, but were instead met with two steadying hands on your shoulders. 
“I do not remember you being this clumsy.” Mapi said to you, and you tried not to look at her. You caught the barest of glimpses of her face, the small scar in her eyebrows that you did not recall her having when you’d dated. Her brown eyes, which held the slightest bit of concern as they took you in, and her lips– tilted slightly up despite the way which she regarded you.
The way she was touching you had your mind reeling once more. Mapi’s palms were firm against your shoulders, reminding you of so many different times which she’d held you just like this. The tips of her fingers just barely brush over the skin of your arms below your sleeves, alighting all new memories which you’d buried long ago.
A blush rose to your cheeks as you registered Mapi’s words. There was nothing to them, as they were spoken rather flatly and so unlike the Mapi you knew– the one full of energy and passion, no matter what she was doing or saying. Despite that, the way Mapi nonchalantly seemed to refer to the fact that she used to know you… you tried so hard not to think about it.
Your mind, however, has always been your greatest enemy. It replayed Mapi’s words and the meaning behind them again and again, even as you stepped away from your ex-girlfriend. Your entire body screamed to step back into her space, just to hear her talk to you again, to feel her touch against your skin.
You had more self-control than that, thankfully, and turned away from them. 
You were thankful for the whistle blowing, signaling the end of the drill. You saw Ingrid hold her hand out to you for a high five… or something, but a jolt of nerves overcame you. You were afraid of what you were feeling towards Ingrid, someone who you certainly should not have been feeling anything for. On top of that, despite how cold and neutral Mapi was towards you, you felt the same kind of attraction towards the Spaniard as you did for the Norwegian. 
As you continued through the training session, several things plagued your mind– Ingrid’s laugh, Mapi’s words, and memories of Mapi’s touch, as well as Ingrids’ hand against your abdomen. Your mind was quickly spiraling, faster than you could control it.
By the time the day was done, you were ready to go home and try to go to sleep early. You were, however, stopped by your captain in Alexia Putellas before you could leave.
“Tenemos… we have team bonding tonight. I will send you the address and information, vale?” Alexia had blocked you from leaving the locker room with her body standing in front of the door. The way which she had positioned herself, combined with the way she looked at you as though you were some caged animal made you feel as though she knew more about how you were feeling than you were ready to admit.
Instead of verbally responding, you nodded. Alexia looked like she wanted to say more, but instead awkwardly moved to the side. You brushed against her, but felt nothing like you had for Ingrid or Mapi. You knew that it was a good thing that you didn’t have feelings for your Captain, but a part of you was still… disappointed.
A part of you had hoped that you could blame your attraction to Ingrid and Mapi’s touches to the fact that you hadn’t been touched or comforted in a long time. The fact that you didn’t want to curl up in Alexia’s arms from the barest of touches had you feeling… wound up, almost. You were incredibly frustrated, because you knew you couldn’t find the relief that your body yearned for in another person who would be so much easier to confide in.
As you made your way out of the locker room, your mind continued to reel and ponder the thoughts which had kept you sleepless for days.
Mapi and Ingrid watched you leave, the barest of frowns on their faces. They had noticed how you’d been acting– first, at the match, and now at your first practice. It had been Mapi who had pointed out the way that you leaned into Ingrids’ touch, and the way that you seemed to avoid eye contact. The Spanish woman had noted the black eye bags which deepened below your eyes, and the way that your shoulders sagged.
Ingrid had noticed it, too, and both girls felt helpless. They’d discussed Mapi’s relationship with you prior to you joining the team, and had come to the agreement that they would act professionally towards you. Mapi couldn’t discard the anger that she felt towards you now, even years after the two of you had broken up. 
You’d been her first love, and when you’d broken up with her to be with someone else, Mapi had been torn in half for years. Even more so when she realized that you’d been cheating on her. 
Ingrid had helped fix the parts that Mapi had never trusted anybody else with after you, and Mapi was incredibly reluctant to allow you back in.
Even so, neither girl could get the way that you were acting around them out of their heads. You were acting strange, and while Ingrid didn’t want to bring it up with Mapi due to the fact that the girl was still hurt over you, she felt like you needed help.
Both girls were confined to simply watching from the sidelines, aware that there was something wrong with you. What they didn’t realize, however, was that they were what was wrong with you.
-----
Two hours later found you driving to your captains’ residence for a mandatory team bonding movie night. 
You were all too aware of the fact that you were late to the event, having been unable to decide what to wear. You wanted to look nice– for Ingrid and Mapi… and the rest of the team, of course, to make a good first impression on them outside of training. 
However, you continually shrugged off each article of clothing that you put on. Each piece was either too formal for a movie night, too informal, too baggy, too tight… nothing was making you feel like you needed to feel.
Finally, after half an hour spent debating, you settled on a Barcelona team hoodie which you’d received that morning and a pair of plain black shorts. You slid a pair of socks and sandals on, a style which you refused to drop despite many of your friends making fun of you for it. Then, you were out the door, jogging towards your car in the parking garage as you realized you should have been at your captains’ house five minutes ago.
You hummed along to whatever Spanish song was playing on the radio, as you couldn’t be bothered to waste time by connecting your phone to the bluetooth speaker of the vehicle. Your thumbs tabbed nervously against the leather of the cars’ steering wheel, and you tried not to think about how nervous you were.
You tried especially hard to not think about who was making you so nervous.
The minute that Alexia’s door was opened for you, however, you caught sight of the two girls who were, by this point, living in your head rent free. Really, you should have considered asking them for money for the way that they were in your mind most of the time.
Faintly, you registered the sound of Alexia shutting her front door behind you. Then, you felt her hand on one of your shoulders as she ushered you further into her home. Mapi and Ingrid’s gazes both tracked up to you, but as soon as they were looking at you, your gaze looked away.
You shuffled awkwardly towards the rest of the team, your gaze almost panicked in the way that it was trying to find a place for you to sit down. 
You’d never been so jumpy or nervous around other people before. Now, however, you felt like a fish out of water with the way you were struggling in front of these strangers. You could usually fit into any crowd like a glove, but were struggling to do so now, when it mattered to you and your career. You figured it was due to the tension between Mapi, Ingrid, and yourself. 
Your hands tapped nervously at your sides, fingers shaky. Your nervousness was obvious to everyone in the room, and each girl ached to comfort you. However, due to the fact that you were new and none of the girls really knew you, they didn’t know how.
Slowly, Mapi shifted over. The way you looked– so small and exhausted, was unlike the person she was used to seeing from you. She wanted to help you, despite the fact that she still held a grudge against you. She’d tried so, so hard to bury her feelings for you, but she couldn’t help but still care for you. 
She still noticed the small things that had made her fall in love with you in the first place. Your kind eyes, and your smile, as well as the way you always checked in on the people around you. You were always keeping an eye out for your teammates, your friends, and your family, and you had a passion about you and a stubbornness that reminded Mapi so much of her own. 
Before Mapi could think better of it, she was raising her hand for you to sit in the space that she’d cleared for you– a small space between her and Ingrid. If you sat there, it would mean that you’d be squished between your ex-girlfriend and your current girlfriend.
Ingrid tried not to let the surprise show on her face as Mapi moved and beckoned you to come sit between them. She watched your face carefully, however, and surveyed the nervous expression on your face. So many emotions flitted across your facial features– surprise, confusion, and an emotion that she couldn’t really recognize. 
You were conflicted, trying to figure out whether you physically and emotionally could sit between the girls. You knew what their touch did to you, and you felt like they would simply overwhelm you if you went to them. On the other hand, the space between them was the only one available, and you didn’t want to turn Mapi’s kind gesture down. 
You began to make your way over, all-too-aware of the way your nerves heightened as you stepped closer to the couple. Suddenly, though, someone grabbed at your ankle, nearly tripping you. 
You looked down and nearly screamed in relief as you recognized your England Lionesses’ teammates. Lucy and Keira were bundled up in a blanket on the ground, sharing a bowl of popcorn between them. 
You didn’t think either girl knew about your history with Mapi, but you knew Keira could sense your nerves in the way she was looking at you. It was similar to the way Alexia had treated you earlier– like a wild animal. 
Keira patted the seat beside her, going so far as to lift the edge of the blanket for you to scoot in. Gratefully, you sat down beside her, not daring to risk looking behind you.
If you had, you would have seen the way Mapi frowned at you. The Spanish woman had, despite herself, wanted to sit next to you and Ingrid. She didn’t know why, but she felt like it was right, and a part of you missed your touch… your presence, actually. 
When you’d smiled at Ingrid earlier, Mapi had been insanely jealous. 
At first, she thought she’d been jealous of you, because she’d always been rather protective of Ingrid. However, Mapi later realized that she’d been jealous of Ingrid. The older woman knew that she still had feelings for you, of course, but she was slowly beginning to realize that she had feelings for both Ingrid and you, which was sending her into a downward spiral of confusion. 
Ingrid, too, was in a similar position to you and Mapi. She had yet to broach the topic with her girlfriend but, as she watched Mapi look at you, she realized that she would have to talk to Mapi sooner rather than later. She recognized the emotion that she’d seen on your face only moments ago, because it was now on Mapi’s face and, more than likely, on her own. 
Love. No matter how shallow the feeling, Ingrid could recognize the flickering emotion within her heart– a shy nervousness that impacted her whenever she interacted with you, or Mapi. 
You were unaware of the conflicted thoughts that the couple was going through behind you, however. As soon as Keira wrapped her spare arm around your shoulders, you rested your head against the girls’ chest. You and Keira had always been close on your national teams, having played together for a very long time and had similar personalities that allowed you to understand each other. 
You felt safe enough in her arms, and that safety allowed you to fall asleep for the first time in longer than you cared to admit. As soon as Keira realized that your breaths had turned deep and that you’d become limp against her, Keira refused to move.
She’d recognized your exhaustion during practice and wanted you to sleep as much as possible. 
For an hour and a half, you slept fully and contentedly against one of your best friends’ shoulders. For an hour and a half, your thoughts were cleared of anything related to a certain Spanish or Norwegian woman. For an hour and a half, you knew peace.
Then, you woke up to Mapi shaking you awake. The girl was gentle with her grip, and you were confused for a moment. Your hand raised before you could think better of the motion, and you slapped her hand away.
Mapi backed up a step, her face speaking volumes for how hurt she was by the action. You saw pain behind her expression, and you felt instant regret for the way which you’d shoved her away. You could barely stand to be touched by the woman that you couldn’t have, because she made you feel things that you hadn’t felt for years.
Her girlfriend behind her gently took her hand, drawing her close to her. Ingrid looked at you over her shoulder, eyebrows furrowed. She didn’t look angry, just confused and concerned, but she didn’t speak as she and Mapi walked away from your bundled form on the floor. 
You had half a mind to get up and run after them. You yearned to scream your feelings for them out loud, just to get them out of your head. 
You realized how ridiculous the idea was as soon as you thought of it. Instead, you were sentenced to watching the couple walk away from you, aching to comfort them and aching for them to comfort you. 
As it was, you weren’t apart of their relationship, and you knew that you didn’t deserve the comfort that you ached for. As the door shut behind them, you tried to blink away the tears which threatened to spill out of your eyes, dismissing yourself as well. 
You quickly got up, leaving the room to find Alexia’s bathroom. There, you rapidly splashed cold water on your face to try to break yourself out of the reverie you were in.
It did nothing but shock your system and, as you rested your forearms against the white porcelain of Alexia’s bathroom sink, your eyes observed your exhausted form in the mirror. 
There you’d gone, breaking the promise that you’d made to yourself– the promise you’d made to get rid of the feelings you’d had for the couple. 
As a tear flitted down your pale cheek, you wondered if ignoring your feelings would be the end of you. However, you reminded yourself that you would only make things worse by having feelings for the pair. 
You had to keep your promise, even if it meant feeling nothing at all ever again. 
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waayfo · 26 days
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THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO LOVE AVENTURINE !
✧ ◝ summary the important steps to love aventurine, 100% approved by aventurine. (or the things you do that he love)
✧ ◝ fluff / hurt/comfort / light angst / hsr spoilers (aventurine’s past) / mentions of aventurine’s real name (kakavasha) / reverse comfort / gn!reader / some personal hcs / trauma / lmk if i miss some !
Alright so, i noticed that Aven always hides his left hand, and when he puts his hands together to pray, he also uses his left hand. So i assumed that his left hand was verrryyyyy special to him.
While in the Dreamscape, he also said that he always hid one hand (left hand) under the gambling table, and that hand always gripped the chips as tightly as possible (based on his dialogue during the quest).
So imagine— you, who have a special place somewhere in his heart, always hold his left hand carefully, then caress it. He would go feral fr.
He would joke about it by saying, “if you keep doing that, i’m afraid that my left hand will always bring big luck.”
And every time he wakes up from the same nightmare that always haunts him, he will always look for warmth in you; wants you to hold his hand and then hear your voice that always manages to calm him down to call his name—or even his real name.
Aven is very happy when you let him do small things or simple tasks, such as combing, braiding your hair, or putting on the beautiful jewelry he gave you. And from just one glance, you know how expensive the jewelry is. And he will happily buy you new jewelry again and again.
Aven love the moment when he set foot back home. Because usually, he will see you wearing his shirt— which faintly smells of his fragrance, while you curled up in his king sized bed and asleep while you are waiting for him to come home.
And at that moment, he was ready with his phone to take a photo of you which he thought was adorable.
He love when you’re cooking breakfast for the two of you. Because he can easily surprised you by suddenly hug you from behind, then buried his head on the crook of your neck.
Also, he’s the big spoon! He will always cuddle with you while sleeping and it’s a must. He won't sleep until he makes sure that you are asleep first. Either because he's afraid you'll suddenly leave while he's asleep, or because he just wants to observe every part of you. And to hear your every breath so he knows you are still with him, and to see your face so he can fall in love with you again and again.
Aventurine groaned. He squirmed a little, seeking comfort in the nightmare he saw. As if he couldn't wake up from the nightmare, his eyes refused to open, making himself a little tormented by his past which is again approaching him through his dream.
The past replays itself like a film. A film that he is reluctant to watch again. But the film was played again without his permission.
‘… kakavasha.’ The name that almost everyone forgot was called after long time. Aventurine looked back, seeing a glimmer of light amidst the darkness.
When he squinted his eyes to clearly see the blurry object in the middle of the light, he saw a familiar figure that he had longed to see. She called out his real name once again in despair. ‘Kakavasha..’
But when she called his name one last time, Aventurine could glimpse a small smile on the figure's face. She’s smiling, my sister is smiling at me.
And once the light slowly disappeared, Aventurine woke up. Pulled back to the real world where he belongs. Feeling his head dizzy, Aventurine held his head. At the same time, he was trying to regain consciousness after waking up from a dream.
That's when he realized; tears that seemed to have been coming out of his eyes for a long time, and you were looking at him worriedly. Your one hand is holding his left hand—the hand he considers special. It all felt like a fever dream for Aventurine.
“Kakavasha?” Your voice called his name in worry. This time it's no longer the voice of the familiar figure or his sister, the one calling his name is now you— the person he loves and he treasured the most. Someone who has accompanied him, and always makes sure that he is okay. Someone who always waits for him to come home. It’s you.
Your other hand moved to wipe the tears that had fallen. Your warm hand touched the cold skin of Aventurine. One of the differences between the two of you.
“Don’t cry,” The voice tried to calm him down again. Countless time you’ve been calmed “Everything is okay now.”
Aventurine didn't know how to react. He just kept quiet.
Without thinking, you immediately hugged his body that had felt a lot of suffering. You hugged that fragile body. As he usually did, he returned the hug. His head was buried in your neck. He always manages to find warmth in you. “I’m here, Aven.”
How could he not love you again and again after everything you've done?
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two-white-butterflies · 5 months
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silver spring | coriolanus snow | part two
Description: Coriolanus loses his family to war.
Pairing: young-president!coriolanus snow/wife!reader
Warning: childbirth, major character death, angst, reader is presumed to have died before the 74th hunger games.
part one
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"Coriolanus," you whispered in the dead of night, feeling water trickle down your legs. "Yes?" he raised his eyebrows, eyes adjusting to the light. You were silent for another second. "Yes?" he repeated his question, believing that you were too afraid to speak.
"The child is coming," you groaned - feeling another wave of pain crash towards your hurting body. He bolts awake, not a flash of tiredness seen in his eyes. "Alira! Violet!" he called for your maids, another groan escapes your mouth.
"Coriolanus, calm down." you mumbled, taking the sheets off your lower body. He takes a shuddering breath, regaining his composure. "I am calm," he lied - and all the lights of the mansion began to open.
The first lady is giving birth!
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It was his destiny to be haunted by all of the women he's loved before. His mother, Lucy Gray - you...?
The doctors always told him that your pregnancy was critical, that one mistake could cost your life. It was part of the reason why he distanced himself, he doesn't like to feel hurt - he doesn't want to vulnerable again. He sits outside of your shared room, the doctor arrived a few hours ago.
Are you trying to kill me, Lucy Gray!
He remembers screaming for that damned woman, even during the birth of his child - he couldn't help but think about her. He wonders if he stayed, would his life be different? He wasn't meant to be this - he wasn't born to be the President of Panem, he wasn't born to have all these powers - he took them from someone.
What would his life be like without that pain?
Maybe it was a small cottage, the smell of pumpkin soup - and Lucy. No, stop thinking about Lucy Gray. She's dead. You killed her, Corio.
He snaps out of his thoughts when Alira peeks her head through the door. "She wants you, President Snow." the woman informed, opening the door further until the gap was big enough for Coriolanus to enter.
He sees you laying there - eyes dull, and skin pale enough to see through. "Coriolanus," you called out to him, holding out a hand so that he may hold it. "Does it hurt?" he inquired reluctantly, afraid to show you even a tinge of care. "Very," you chuckled - the servants pull out a chair for him to sit. "- a pain worthy for a strong son." you added - forcing a smile.
Coriolanus couldn't help but smile back.
It was the first time that his smile reached his eyes.
"They've pumped me with enough meds to make a tiger sleep. It's making me drowsy," you continued with the conversation, hoping that it would distract you from the brain-shattering pain on your side. "It's good, you won't remember the pain after." he responded.
He could feel your grip tighten on his hand. You stare at him - forehead filled with sweat. He hates you. He tries to remind himself, but it was no use. How could he hate the mother of his child? How could he hate his wife?
"I wish that they just made me sleep - and cut my stomach open." you mumbled, feeling those tiny needles prick your spine. "The pain will go away, you should listen to the doctor." he mumbled, rubbing circles on your fist. "Gods be damned," you muttered - closing your eyes.
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"What's your favorite color?" he asked, trying to distract you from the pain. The doctor told him that the gap wasn't big enough for the baby to come through. "Green," you answered quickly. "- it's the color of camouflage." you explained, bitting your lower lip.
"Ahh," you hissed, feeling another contraction. "What about you?" you opened your eyes to stare at his. "Orange," he answered. "- and brown." he added and you frowned. "But you always wear black." you observed, as if he was mourning for someone's death.
"It's a professional color," he responded, adjusting his collar. You chuckled through the pain - regretting it after you feel a short pain. "Why do you like those colors?" you inquired and he looked deep into your eyes. "Orange - because it is the color of the sunset. I was swimming when I saw it the first time." he remembered.
"And brown, because?" your eyes narrowed.
"They're the color of your eyes."
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After a few minutes, the child began to come out.
You felt slightly nervous - afraid that it wasn't going to be the boy that Coriolanus desired. You postponed knowing about the gender due to this same fear. "Boy," the doctor informed in a monotone voice. "Brutus," you whispered out, reaching for the baby.
"Brutus Snow." you repeated, feeling his warm skin press against yours. "He is precious," Coriolanus whispered in a tone that only you could hear. "He looks just like me," you smiled, pressing a kiss to Brutus' forehead.
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He looks at your sleeping form again, eyes shut and snoring. He smiles, rocking Brutus in his arms - close to his chest. He'll never love a woman deeper than the way he's loved Lucy Gray, but he's never loved a woman as deep as he loves you.
Brutus cooes, burrowing deeper into his father's arms.
Coriolanus couldn't wish for anything better.
Sure, there were many things that he regretted in this life - many things that could've turned out better, but if he could return and do it again - he wouldn't to it any different. All his mistakes led him to you - and to Brutus Snow.
Your eyelids flutter, awake and gazing up at him. "Coriolanus," you mumbled - also burrowing close to his chest. "I love you," you confessed and he presses a kiss to the top of your head. "I love you too," he responds - although the following day he'll deny it and act oblivious. A smile etches your face.
Nothing else matters.
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(CORIOLANUS SNOW'S EXECUTION)
"What do you think will happen after this? Our father will be executed but his government will still go on. You're not stopping the wheel. You're not changing anything." Abel intervenes, Brutus presses his palms together. "Whatever happens to father, he had it coming." the older brother replies. "You are delusional if you believe that Katniss is your pawn, she's dangerous." Abel hisses.
Brutus takes a sharp turn, hearing the drums from behind them. "- and you believe that you are safe? All because you love her?" his eyes narrowed in insult. Brutus decides to leave the conversation at that - he steps towards the podium. "Life is a peach, brother. Enjoy it as it is ripe and filled with flesh." Brutus angles his head, before facing the crowd.
"Welcome to the new Panem! Today, all of Panem - of free Panem will watch more than a mere spectacle. We are gathered to watch a historic moment of justice. Today the greatest threat to freedom shall be met with fire and end all wars. This day signifies the end of tyranny and the beginning of a new era."
"Mockingjay, may your aim be as true as your heart is pure." Brutus smiles, nodding at Katniss while raising his arms.
Abel looks at his father from below.
A cold man, but a man that loves his family nevertheless. Coriolanus lifts his head to look at his sons for the last time. Katniss draws her bow - an air of suspense permeates through the atmosphere.
Katniss aims her bow but changes the aim at the last minute, hitting President Brutus Snow.
Abel gasps.
He shares a glance with Katniss before the crowd storms in their direction.
Abel manages to get away - to run in another direction while the people rip his father piece by piece. It was the fall of Coriolanus Snow's dynasty, but in the face of that - all members couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief.
The fire continues to burn.
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rosie-writings · 2 months
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Back to Eden
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Request: ✨anon—You and the gang investigate a haunted mansion and the reader is targeted after a joke is made that she looks like the wife in old photos. Medium/Doppleganger trope as well.
Summary: Something about Colby caught your attention, and it’s confirmed when you all learn too much about the afterlife when he brings you to investigate a murder at a haunted estate. How hard can a soul bond love?
Warnings: Murder, Vomiting, Reincarnation, Mediums, Ouija Board use, Light Angst, Soulmates trope, Colby x Reader smut, Unprotected sex, very light Dom/Sub dynamic, and Possessive Romantic Relationship/behavior
Words: 13.5k
No Y/N Used
Title is from ‘Take Me Back to Eden’ by Sleep Token
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It started the day we met.
There was no room in my head to even question whether it was strange or not. Every crevice of my mind filled with him. It was fine. That was it; fine. I didn’t allow myself anything more than a skip of a heartbeat here and a blush there. Nothing more. 
Only once did I allow myself to think of him as I fell asleep, but that was because we literally fell asleep hip to hip. It wasn’t anything more than necessary though. It was during an investigation and there were two beds for the five of us to sleep on unless we slept on the floor. Due to complications, we lost our second room that night, and we were too afraid to sleep separated anyway. I was on the edge of the bed, Colby in the middle, and Sam on his other side while Nate and Seth were in the other one. 
And if I woke up curled around his arm and he woke up facing me sharing a pillow, we didn’t say anything about it. 
I didn’t know what it was. The only logical answer was that we easily clicked. We got along fluently, and the first time we met in person, we talked about everything and cried laughing by the end of the night. I couldn’t shake this feeling, though. And it was a dangerous one.
When I looked him in the eyes the first time, it felt like I knew him.
I chalked it up to him simply being who he was. In every way, he was my type—if I even had one—so technically, anyone who looked like him could have given me these feelings. However, I knew people and had friends who looked similar to him. None of them ever made me feel a fraction of how he did.
Perhaps the morality of cognitive dissonance could have an exception. 
Colby, four days ago while I coincidentally was at a tattoo appointment, messaged me: 
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What are you doing next week?
So, naturally, I responded:
Wow I said no more snaps and you still send selfies
He sent a rolling eyes emoji. And then:
See, the problem with no snaps is now you don’t send photos back
So I said:
Maybe that isn’t the problem but the entire point smh
What do you want from me next week?
Your appearance in a video, he replied.
Perhaps
Perhaps?
I have a lot going on
Lmao no you don’t
Excuse me? Yes I do
What are you doing in four days?
You’ve given me so much room to creatively respond to that
Bitch, what plans do you have?
To make sure I can still walk by the end of this week
???
Ten minutes later, he followed up the question marks with:
What does that mean?
What a concerning thing to say and then leave me on read, he sent. 
Finally when my tattoo was finished, I sent him a selfie back.
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Impatient much?
Ohhhh, he replied.
Jfc did you purposely get it in one of the most painful places?
Yes now what do you want from me next week?
We’re going to a haunted estate in Texas and we want you to come
Oh? Where in Texas?
Outside of Austin
My heart skipped at the thought. That was where we first met. I was from Texas, and there was a party for content creators I was invited to despite being smaller. I met Sam and Colby and a lot of their friends. I still remembered not minding the humid summer night as much as I typically did.
Oh okay so you want me to come
I mean yeah, we all did
Mhm sure
What are you talking about?
Funny how you’re going to Austin and you want me to come
Funny how you’re making a it a big deal
I rolled my eyes but couldn’t hold down my smile. I sat in my car, and even though the back of my knee ached with pain, it was almost numbed by the words staring back at me.
Aw if you wanted me to come with you guys on an investigation to the city we met in of course I’d say yes, how sweet
Nvm. Fuck you
I sent a heart emoji back.
He sent a middle finger emoji.
Buy me a plane ticket.
‘Colby Liked your message’
I went home with jittery hands and a beat in my step. I didn’t even have coffee yet.
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It happened simultaneously. After my career took off a couple months after the party in Austin, I moved to Los Angeles to be with my best friends. Sam and Colby, two weeks prior, moved to Las Vegas. I gave them so much shit for it, but everyone knew that the girls I lived with were my main priority. 
I never planned to live with anyone; I liked my own private space. But somehow these freaks changed my mind.
As I packed my bag—my flight was in a little over an hour and I hadn’t packed yet, how on brand for me—Tara lounged in my bed.
”Don’t you have your own shit to do?” I asked.
”Maybe,” she sighed pathetically. “But your bed is so comfy and your room is so clean.”
”Yeah my bed is comfy because I don’t have a bunch of shit on it.” She gasped.
”That was mean.”
”How many pairs of shoes did you sleep with last night?” She gave me the finger. “There’s your answer.”
”I can’t believe you’re leaving us for a bunch of boys.”
”Same,” I sighed. “But you know how fun these trips are to me.”
”Yeah. Sometimes I forget how much of a freak you are.”
”Uh, I’m not a freak. A spiritual nerd? Perhaps. But not a freak.” She laughed and lay back against the pillows. 
“You met them in Austin, right?”
”Yes,” I said cautiously.
”And Colby asked you to come with them back to Austin?”
”Yes,” I exasperated now. “What’s wrong with that?”
”Nothing,” she shrugged. “I was just wondering when you and Colby were going on a date.”
”Oh my god.” I rolled my eyes as I zipped my suitcase before standing it up. “God forbid a woman be close friends with a man without wanting to fuck him.” 
“And you have you lying eyes on.”
”My lying—Bitch, these are just my eyes!”
”And they’re fucking lying.”
”You’re an idiot. I need to go.”
”At least tell me when you guys get together.”
Finally, it was my turn to give someone the finger.
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I sent Colby a selfie without a message. He quickly responded:
Now who’s sending me selfies not on snap
I wish I could unsend texts
We’re leaving soon, he said after reacting to my last message.
I didn’t respond.
There was nothing better than taking a flight home especially when my headphones were on and I was alone in my aisle. As I looked out the window and watched as we descended from the puffy winter clouds, I realized that this was one of those moments that I was ever grateful for my job. During the quiet moments, the moments alone, and the ones I get to go home with headphones on and friends waiting for me on the other side, 
Something leapt within me at the thought of meeting my friends in my home city; the one where I saw them for the first time. And maybe I thought about one of the four more than the rest, but I didn’t let my brain trail too far away from me. I needed to keep my senses about me to get through this week. 
Colby said it would be a big one.
Before each investigation, of course they researched the locations. He didn’t tell me anything; I wondered if it was that interesting or if he had a feeling. I had a feeling, but I always did before investigating with them.
I choked the feeling down when my Uber from the airport dropped me off at the hotel we were sharing for tonight. Well, tonight we were sleeping at the estate we were investigating and we would probably sleep through the rest of the afternoon before checkout to get to our next flight. I couldn’t decide if I was excited for it or not. 
Maybe we wouldn’t sleep but wait until sunrise then hurry out to debrief in a safe diner.
Sam and Colby scheduled it so that they would be at the hotel first. 
I couldn’t shake this feeling inside of me especially when the hotel room door opened and I saw Sam’s smiling face. 
“Hello!”
”Sam hi!” My arms were around his neck as the door closed. 
“It’s been so long since we’ve last seen you.” He led me into the room. It was work to swallow with such a dry tongue.
”I know! Didn’t mean for it to be so long.” My words died in my throat when I came around the corner and saw Colby. He sat on the bed with his phone in his hand. When he looked up at me, I could have passed out. Seeing him in person for the first time in months almost made me drop dead; my vision narrowed and I didn’t know exactly what to do with my body.
”Oh so you did decide to come after all—“
”Hey stupid,” I laughed. My heart stopped when he got off the bed. “How could I miss another opportunity of both of you running, crying, screaming, throwing up because of a little ghost hunt—“
”You’re an idiot,” Colby said as he pulled me into a hug.
”Of course that’s why you’d come back,” Sam jeered. “At least laugh at Nate and Seth too.”
”Oh no,” I scoffed as I pulled from Colby. “There will be plenty of teasing to go around.”
After, when Nate and Seth arrived and we had dinner and settled after traveling, it was time for us to make our way to the estate. It was only 20 minutes from our hotel, and the entire time, the boys bickered and told jokes while trying to introduce the viewers to the history of the estate. 
“They say that Miss Johnson was a medium, and that due to the religion that was prominent in this area at the time, she was forced to be silent about her craft or be excommunicated from the city,” Sam began.
”But,” Colby took over. “Because it was one of the two ways she made a living and because she believed in it as firmly as she did, she left the community she was in. On top of being a medium, she worked as a seamstress and was very good at her job. In 1886, she was hired by the lady of the estate to make clothes for everyone who lived in it. During her time at the estate, though, it was reported that she would sneak personal belongings into the dressing rooms to communicate with spirits of the house and also keep herself cleansed from bringing any back to her guest house that was on the property. She said there were three that were most active and always made sure that guests knew that they were present even if they were new to the estate.”
”The most active spirit claimed to be Ada who was the First Lady of the estate a generation before,” Sam started again. “Apparently she died of natural causes on the estate, but before her, her husband, William, passed away from a virus he caught while traveling.”
”The weird thing about the whole story,” Colby went on. “Is that it says that Ada’s death was from natural causes, but she only lived for 48 years. That doesn’t add up unless she had an underlying disease or something that was never recorded.”
”Maybe she was saying fuck ya’ll to all the damn men she had to live with,” Nate scoffed with a sassy flick of the wrist. I rolled my eyes and looked out my window. I sat behind Sam who drove, and Nate sat in between Seth and I.
”We don’t know how she died,” Sam laughed. “Okay, back to the medium. Her story is very interesting because while she worked at the estate, she reported three ghosts even though only two people—Will and Ava—were claimed to have died there since they were the first generation to live in the estate. She claimed to have communicated with a woman ghost and a child ghost, not so much the ghost of a man.”
”Two months after Miss Johnson started gossiping with the other servants of the estate that there was a child ghost living on property, she was brutally murdered in the dressing room,” Colby said. “So the rumor is that maybe there was a child in the estate but they passed and someone wanted to cover up the death?”
”Or maybe someone wanted to cover up that the child existed in the first place,” Seth suggested.
”Which opens a lot of other question,” I quickly replied.
”Right,” Colby agreed. “So there’s a lot of nuance and sketchy things going on behind the scenes.”
”I’m not sure why Miss Johnson would have been murdered in such a violent way, though,” Sam said. “If it wasn’t to cover up whatever ghost politics she was talking about, then what was it? Because a murder that gruesome must be an act of passion, but who did she piss off that badly?”
”I guess we will find out more information when we go on that tour.”
It wasn’t the tour that intrigued me, no. Immediately when we drove on property, the hair on my arms raised. I looked over my shoulder. I watched through my window intently. 
The boys goofed as we grabbed the supplies and made an intro to Sam and Colby’s video, but I tried my best to remain silent and calm.
It was like the ash trees had eyes.
”Hello!” Our tour guide greeted us as we entered the house. “Welcome to the Bateman estates, I’m Angie the current owner.”
The floorboards under my feet felt ten feet away from me. 
I stepped through the threshold behind her as Sam followed me and the rest of the boys followed him. My eyes latched on to every object of the room. The cream wallpaper filled the top two thirds of the walls while dark wood paneled the bottom third. The crystal chandelier in the foyer matched the crystal and gold wall lamps on the sides of the entrances of other room. A wide wooden staircase lengthened up either side of the walls of the foyer and met together at a wide plateau where various hallways branched off. The yellow lighting rained down on us gently, and for the first time since walking up to Sam and Colby that night at the party, a sweet fragrance made itself home in the back of my throat.
Familiarity.
I looked through the left threshold. It led to a sitting area full of furnishings and a bay window that overlooked the fields to the left of the house. I looked to the right, and I looked in between Nate and Colby to see the white and clack checkered flooring. It must have been the kitchen.
“We have had numerous visitors tell us that this was the house that made them believe in the paranormal,” Angie continued. My eyes pulled into focus from the kitchen, and when they landed on the person my gaze dodged, I met eyes with Colby who already looked directly at me.
Another glance shared between us a good four seconds too long. I looked back at Angie.
”Does anyone ever say that these are good or evil spirits? Or do they feel anything weird at all?” Sam asked. I was glad someone in this house had a level head on their shoulders because mine certainly was not.
”Not at all!” Angie exclaimed. “We’ve never had an evil spirit. There’s been freaky movement though, and a few people have reported there being a trickster or sorts here, but nothing pure evil by any means.”
”That’s good that they’re nice then,” Seth said. Angie nodded.
”I’ve made my way around working at plenty of haunted hotels, houses, and such, and there’s a reason that this was the property I invested in. I’ve never felt such good and light spirits before.”
”That actually helps a lot,” Nate laughed. I looked at Colby again.
He was already smiling in my direction.
”William and Ada Bateman first moved to this estate after his job took off. They lived in the city beforehand but he needed to get out because of some issues with this job. Apparently guests who have visited this house say that there’s a woman spirit here who makes her presence very much so known by playing with hair, moving things, or making noises. Sometimes people can see a woman with a white or pink dress in the corner of their eyes.”
”Oh shit, that means she has a lot of power to make herself that known,” Nate said. Angie nodded.
”If it’s Ada, yes. She has the most power in this house.”
We continued the tour. 
“This room,” the guide started slowly. We knew what lay on the other side of the door. She had already led us through the downstairs and multiple rooms upstairs. By tone of voice, we knew what happened in this one. Colby entered first behind her then Sam, Seth, me and Nate. “This room is the dressing room where Miss Johnson was murdered.” I subconsciously bit the inside of my cheek as I looked around. 
There was absolutely nothing ominous about it. 
I didn't anticipate the house being so open, warm, and homey. The orange glow of the lights illuminated the faded yellow and pink floral wallpaper, and the plush intricately designed yellow, cream, and red rug under us swallowed my feet whole even through my shoes. It felt like I could curl up comfortably in this room and lull to sleep by the brush of the trees below. 
“Do you know why she was murdered?” Sam asked. 
“They say it was because she communicated with the ghosts and made a big deal about it through the house. Apparently some of the other servants were religious and didn't like the way she tried to communicate with spirits. That's some motive, but apparently her death was never avenged.”
“Wait, they never found out who killed her?” Colby asked. Angie shook her head. 
“No. They couldn't find evidence among the servants and they didn't have visitors during the time of her death. It was like it was sudden.”
“Is there a child ghost here?” My mouth ran before I could catch it, and I confidently held Angie's eye contact as the boys shot looks at me. 
“Well, that was a part of the story too, we think.” We all stood silent waiting for more. “Apparently two maids especially hated Miss Johnson for bringing children into her gossip about the spirits. She started saying that a child ghost also lived in this estate even though no children had lived here. It raised suspicions among the servants. Some would spread rumors believing that there had to be a child ghost and further investigating whose baby it was and then others would not believe her and make fun of Miss Johnson.
“Two maids specifically, though, were the oldest servants of the house. They were Ada’s personal maids, and they especially did not appreciate the gossiping about children ghosts. They tried to get Miss Johnson to shut up about it and suddenly a couple months later, she was found dead.” I gawked at Annie's story. 
“Wait, you're saying that the two servants who personally knew Ada and were close to her were the ones who didn't like the stories about the child ghost?” Sam gasped. Angie nodded. 
“That's right.”
“What if Ada had a baby and it died when it was young? Why would they want to cover it up? Was it with another man?” Seth asked. 
“There are no records of a baby ever being born here. Except for one photo.” My stomach dropped at the thought. “There's a photo of Ada and a baby in the lord and lady’s room playing with the baby. The thing is, Will is behind them sitting and watching happily. The only record we have of the baby is one where both parents seem happy that they have her.
“Now, there's no evidence for this and I usually don't talk about this because I'm not on one to stir the pot really, but apparently there were political issues behind the scenes of William’s work. There was a lot of tension especially since the Civil War had ended, and William was against slavery the entire time, so when it was abolished, there were a lot of people who held a grudge with him because of where they lived. It kind of made him a target considering his business was also quite successful so he had money and power too.”
”Do you think someone killed the baby then to get back at him?” Sam asked.
”The politics in his work were brutal. It was either that or someone didn’t want him having an heir.”
“Can we see photos?” I asked.
”Yeah,” Angie said as she led us from the room. “We were headed there next.”
The next room was the primary bedroom. Seth followed Angie and Sam and Nate followed him. I was at Colby’s side, and when it was our turn to walk through the door, I went in front of him.
The second I took a step towards the door, my heart raced, clammy sweat rose to my hairline, and a chill swept through me.
”Holy shit—“ My eyes widened in fear and I froze in my place at the scared tone of Colby’s voice.
”What?” Sam gasped when he heard that tone as well and he turned to look at us. “Oh fuck!” 
“What?” I cried. “Everyone’s looking at me and freaking out—”
”There’s a strand of your hair that’s literally raising up by itself like someone is lifting it—Oh.” Right as Colby pointed it out, the hair dropped like whoever it was that held my hair walked away.
”What the fuck was that?” Seth cried.
“Probably Ada.” My eyes widened. Makes her presence very much so known by playing with hair, was what Angie just told us downstairs.
”No way!” Colby laughed as we entered the rest of the way in. “Wait, that's crazy, did you feel it?” I shook my head.
”No, not at all.”
”She’s never violent. In fact, a lot of times, she’s so gentle with the things she does that sometimes we can’t tell if it’s her or not.”
I looked around the room and blinked furiously. 
The chill didn’t leave me. 
The sweat didn’t leave. 
Welcome back.
”Wait,” I gasped. Then all eyes were on me. In a panic, as I returned to myself for a minute, I cowered in and turned to Colby.
”What’s wrong?” Sam asked. I gave Colby a look.
”No-No, keep going it’s fine,” he said. 
When I heard Angie’s voice again, I started telling him.
”Did you hear that?” I asked him so quietly that my mouth made more sound than my voice. His eyes widened.
”No? What—“
”I don’t think I heard it audibly, but you know when a voice just comes in your head and it isn’t your own and it’s so sure of itself that it has to be something else?”
”Actually yeah,” he gasped. “Wait, you have that too?” I nodded furiously.
”Yes! All the damn time, it’s annoying.”
”Sam said he hadn’t had that before.”
”Anyway,” I sighed and swallowed tightly. “When we walked in, I had a cold chill, I was sweating, and then I heard it in my head like that, something that said ‘welcome back’ and—“ Colby’s eyes widened in fear as he stared at me then he looked at Sam who already analyzed us on the other side of the room. “And I could just be making things up or something, but I swear to god—“
”You feel like you’ve been here before?” Hesitantly, I nodded. “Alright. I do to, I didn’t tell them that though.”
”What?” I gasped. “Why didn’t you?”
”Why didn’t you?” My silence answered the question. “Yeah that’s what I thought.”
”What’s happening?” Sam finally broke his silence. 
“We’ll talk about it in a little,” Colby determined with finality, and we tuned in to the rest of the tour.
”These are all the photos we have left that were taken at this estate,” Angie said, and on the left wall of the room, between two large windows that overlooked the field and the lake, were almost two dozen photos on the wall. At first it was hard to see. The sun nearly set, and these were west facing windows, so orange bands of bright light shot through the room.
My only thought was to curl up in the middle of the bed.
It looked incredibly soft with the layers of intricately stitched cream blankets and pillows; I could take the hardest nap nestled in the middle of it. The plush rug under my feet nearly lulled me to sleep like the last room as I made my way over to the photos. The boys followed, and Angie began speaking about the significant ones.
”This is William, that’s Ada, and those are some of the servants, and that was taken in the fields with the dogs—“
I couldn’t remember the rest of what she said. My eyes never left William’s photo. I wasn’t sure I was breathing anymore, not when a familiar feeling washed over me.
Not when the same feeling I had when I looked at Colby in the eyes rained down on me the moment I looked at this photo in the eyes.
”Oh my god,” Seth laughed. “Wait, look at this one. It looks so stupid; looks like you,” he called out my name and it snapped my attention back to him. I glared at him as he laughed.
”Whatever, asshole,” I said. I looked at the photo lower on the wall. It must have been Ada. She was in the garden with what looked to be her maids, but she relaxed with them and smiled and made silly faces. My heart skipped again.
”Wait,” Colby said ever so quietly. My heart skipped again. I looked at him. His eyes never let the photo in front of him. I followed his gaze, it was Ada’s photo. “You do look like her, don’t you?” I really looked at Ada now.
”I—“ I stumbled over my words. I was about to mock him, but the thoughts died in my throat when I realized that I did, in fact, look similar to her. 
“Oh my god, she does!” Sam said.
”Ada is most active in this room,” Angie said from behind us. “People also report hearing voices and a baby’s cry, and also seeing apparitions here or down the hallway coming in this direction.”
”Oh, so people have seen figures too?” Seth asked. 
“They have,” Angie said. “People say that places where frequent birth and death are the most active for spirits, and since this is the room that’s most active, we suspect that Ada passed in this room, probably gave birth in this room. But a lot of the exact details and history of this estate are hidden.” I couldn’t take my eyes off the bed. When Colby’s hand gently held onto my elbow to lead me out of the room with everyone else, goosebumps trailed over my skin in the wake of his touch. What was wrong with me?
”So,” Angie began the end of the tour as we entered the foyer again. “If you are wanting to get as in touch with the spirits of the house as possible, I recommend doing your thing in the kitchen, the dressing room, and the primary bedroom, but, of course, everywhere has a chance of activity.”
”Thank you so much!” Sam told her, and after our final goodbyes, the five of us were left in the house alone.
”Alright,” Sam spoke to the camera. “We’re going to have to leave a music box in the hallway upstairs outside of the primary room.”
”Definitely,” Seth agreed. 
“Maybe, if you guys are up for it, we can do a little bit of a seance in the dressing room or primary room?”
”Jesus Christ, I knew you were going to fucking say that,” Nate groaned.
”Of all places, it’s the safest to do it here. Have you felt the demons? There are none!” 
That, of all things, was true. Not an ounce of dark energy or fear intimidated me through the entire tour, and the rest must have agreed because we planned a seance in the primary room at three am.
”I think I’m going to volunteer Seth to do the Estes method,” Colby said as he fished supplies out of his backpack.
”Why am I always the Estes method bait?” He whined.
“Because the ghosts like you,” Colby sighed as he tossed Seth headphones. “You should be thankful. They don’t like me as much. Let’s get the rem pod and ask spirits some questions first.”
Immediately as the rem pod turned on, it lit up.
”Is it messed up?” Colby asked. Sam recalibrated it. It continued the beeping and flashing of lights even as Sam got up and stood next to us. “Damn, maybe not.”
”If there’s a spirit here with us could you possibly walk away from the lights? It’s our device to communicate—“
The rem pod turned off.
I looked at Sam with bright eyes as he turned to me as well.
”Thank you, and to make sure you’re actually listening and can hear us, can you step close to the red device again?”
Immediately the lights turned on. My heart pounded as my eyes fixated on the empty space around the pod.
”Thank you so much, I’m Sam and these are my friends. We wanted to ask the spirits in this house some questions, light up the device for yes or turn it off for no, would that be alright?”
The lights didn’t end.
”Awesome, hi I’m Seth. Is this Ada?”
The lights turned off.
”No,” he gasped. “Is this William?” They didn’t turn on. “Is this Miss Johnson?”
The rem pod shrilled to life. I gasped and looked at the others.
”Hi Miss Johnson,” he said.
”This is so freaky, how is it so exact?” I whispered to Colby who stood on the other side of me.
”I don’t fucking know,” he laughed.
”We were wondering if you were willing to tell us a bit about the house?” The lights stayed on. “Perfect. You’re really active, is there something you want to tell us eventually tonight?”
The lights still stayed on. It must have been an accident.
”Ask a controlled question just in case,” I mumbled.
”Did you work as a chef in the house?” Colby asked. The lights turned off.
”Well shit,” Sam laughed. “Were you the gardener?” Still no lights.
”Were you the seamstress?” I asked and the rem pod woke to life again. 
“People say that you were a medium as well, is that true?” The rem pod stayed on after Sam’s question. “Is that the reason you’re so active?” The lights didn’t turn off.
”Do Will and Ada live here still?” The rem pod stopped then started again. Colby shot Sam a confused look.
”Do they sometimes live here?” Yes. “Do you mean that they can come and go as they please?” Also yes. “No way,” Sam gasped as he turned back to Colby. “That means there’s a vortex or a hotspot or something in this house.”
”We should find it and ask questions there,” Nate said. 
“Thanks for talking to us, Miss Johnson. You can follow us around the house tonight if you’d like.” 
And Sam turned off the rem pod.
”First one to find the vortex has to do the Estes method in it,” Colby said.
”Bitch, you’re saying that like it’s a reward,” Nate snapped back.
”Someone’s bound to find it—“
”Found it.” We spun on our heels and noticed that Seth was missing. 
“Seth?” Sam called.
”Over here.” We followed the voice around the corner of the kitchen and walked back into the foyer. He stood in between the two staircases and on the walls across from each other, there were two mirrors.
”Wow, it’s almost as if the house chose you to do the Estes method,” I jeered.
”Fuck ya’ll, I was actually trying to look for it unlike you bums who stood around bickering about not doing it.”
”It was literally right in front of us,” Sam sighed before he reached for the spirit box in his backpack. “Alright, someone go get a chair.”
A minute later, Colby came back with a chair and placed it in between the mirrors.
”I hate you guys, for the record.”
”We figured the hate hadn’t left since the Conjuring house.” Seth gave Sam the finger as he pulled the blindfold over his eyes.
”If there’s any spirit in the house, you’re welcome to come talk to Seth through the spirit box,” Colby called loudly. 
“Loud,” Seth immediately said in that monotone voice. We all whirled our gazes to him.
”What’s loud?”
”Colby.” The room froze.
”You said my name,” Colby said. “Do you know me?”
”Know you.”
”Do you know all of us?” Silence. I could almost make out the flipping of channels under the noise canceling headphones. 
“Come.”
”Where do you want us to go?”
”Follow me.”
“Who are we talking—“
A loud noise from upstairs cut Colby off. 
Then the music box started playing. I looked up the stairs immediately, but saw nothing as the chilling music sang down to us. We all gawked at each other in silence.
”Was-Was that in the dressing room?” 
“It was!” Sam gasped quietly at Nate’s faint question.
”Are you in the dressing room?”
”Maybe.”
”What’s your name?”
”Come find out.”
”Uh,” Sam said as he slowly turned to Colby. “I thought there weren’t evil spirits here. Why does this feel weird?” Colby shook his head.
”I mean, a full on murder happened in this house so like, there has to be some kind of residual negative energy,” Colby replied.
”Could just be a trickster, though, like she said,” I intervened.
”That’s true,” Sam said. “Maybe we should go where it’s asking us to go to—“
”Bedroom.” Seth’s single word cut our conversation short.
”Get him out,” Sam said as he looked back at Colby. “We’re going to the primary room.”
I sat at the foot of the bed. My right foot rested on the bed in front of me, and I messed with the shoelaces. My hands were busy; they needed something for my brain to stay grounded.
I watched as the boys set up the Estes method again for Seth and also placed the rem pod in the middle of the room. The bedroom door was open so that we could hear the music box. 
“Alright,” Sam sighed as he sat in the middle of the rug between the rem pod and Seth who sat in the chair. His bright eyes looked up at Seth expectantly. “It’s really not weird here, is it?” He asked. Seth shook his head.
”No, it isn’t, actually,” Colby said.
”I really don’t think it’s evil. If there’s any spirits in the house who would like to—“
The rem pod shrilled to life.
“Alright then, let’s go,” Colby said, and Seth pulled on the blindfold.
“Are you Miss Johnson?” The rem pod didn’t turn off. “Are you Ada?” The rem pod stopped.
”Here,” Seth said. Sam looked at Colby quickly.
”There could be more than one; maybe everyone’s here.” 
“We came.”
”Oh, yeah I did call you guys.”
”You,” Seth’s monotone voice responded to Colby.
”Me? Or who—“
”Colby.” The room fell still as we stared back and forth between each other.
”You-You said my name—Did any of you say my name since being here?” Colby asked as he turned to each of us.
“It’s been hours, I’m not sure,” I said slowly. 
“You,” Seth repeated.
”I know,” Colby said. “What about me?”
“Not quite what… I didn’t get the rest of that.”
”Not quite, what?” Sam asked. ”Miss Johnson, you said you were a medium, was there something about the Bateman’s you found out but shouldn’t have known about?” A few beats of silence passed.
”I’m sorry to say,” Seth cut the silence.
”What did you find out that you were sorry about?” 
“I’m not mad at all about it. Holy shit, that was a full sentence.”
“What are you not mad about?” Colby asked.
“You were sick.” My eyebrows rose in question, and I turned to the three to see what they thought that meant.
”Who was sick? Who do you mean by you?” Sam asked.
”I told you.”
”Colby?” He clarified. “Are you talking about last year?”
”Not quite what… It was the same sentence I missed before.”
“Not quite…” Sam mumbled in thought. “I’m confused.”
”Is there a child ghost here?” I asked.
“Certainly.” 
“No way,” Nate gasped. “Literally answered that immediately.” 
I saw a shadow from the corner of my eye.
And then the music box. 
I leapt, though, before the music box went off, and the boys also jumped as I scared them. 
“What the fuck was that?” Colby asked me. My heart pounded in my chest as I looked to where I saw the shadow run by.
It would have been child height in the hallway running past the door. 
The music box turned off.
”I-I—It’s okay—”
”No, what was it?” Colby pushed on. I looked up at him, and I supposed that my wide eyes and pale face was enough proof for him to believe me.
”There-There was—I saw a shadow run by. How did you not see it? You would have seen it perfectly from where you are.”
”I didn’t see anything.”
”She literally jumped before the music box went off,” Nate confirmed.
”What was—”
”Child.”
”That was the child?” Sam gasped.
”Yes.”
”Who else is here? Miss Johnson, the child, Will and Ada?”
”There’s more.”
”More?” Colby gasped, and Sam looked up at him with wide fearful eyes.
”Who else?”
”Visitors.”
”No, no,” Colby gasped as the pieces fit together. He stood away from where he leaned against the bed next to me and pointed at Sam. “That’s what it told us; there’s a vortex and they can go and come as they please. I bet spirits can travel to this house and leave it.”
”You’re totally right,” Sam said. “Can you tell us who—“
”It doesn't matter.”
”Why doesn’t it matter?”
”Because… Because—I didn’t catch that—welcome back.”
My vision pounded to black and my heart fell out of my ass,
”Welcome—Who are you welcoming back?”
”Colby.” The three of us looked at Colby with wide eyes.
”I’ve not been here before.”
”Before.”
”Before what?”
The room was silent for a while. 
Nate sucked in a breath to say something, but Seth cut him off.
”Death.”
”What?” Sam gasped. “The fuck does that mean?”
“It said-It said you were here before death, is that what it said?” Nate asked. 
At that point, my heart tied in my throat, and I couldn’t dare look in Colby’s direction. I knew he looked at me.
”Um, when was I here—“
”Long time ago.”
“To a ghost, a long time ago could mean a lot different than what it means to us,” Sam said.
”It’s you.”
”Who’s you?” 
Seth said my name.
No, the spirit box said my name; it was so vivid and loud in the headphones, that I caught the unmistakable syllables of the word. I wondered if I passed out because I didn’t remember much of the Estes method after that. 
There was no other explanation for how this ghost knew my name. Perhaps Sam and Colby’s names were familiar with the ghosts, but not mine. 
“Get him out.”
It was over before I could process what happened.
”Why did it say her name though?” Sam asked and Colby looked back at him with no answers.
“And why the fuck did it say ‘it’s you?’ What an ominous thing to say,” Nate said.
”Just before it said that Colby had been here before death. What does that mean?” Sam’s voice raised and I flinched. I turned from them. 
There was an ache.
An ache that cut so deep in my chest, I wondered if the bone cracked. Tears welled in my eyes.
”What-What’s wrong?” I heard Colby’s voice. I took a step away from them.
And when I accidentally let out a sob, I heard Colby push Seth away.
”Cut the cameras.”
I didn’t like that tone in his voice.
He knew.
It sounded like he was about to cry as well.
”What is it?” He asked as I left the room, he was on my heels. I shook my head as I wiped the few tears that fell.
”Colby,” I said with a tense jaw. He stopped.
We stood alone on the plateau that overlooked the foyer. I slowly turned to him. I looked at him.
He looked at me.
We didn’t say anything.
I couldn’t think of the words to say, and I visibly saw the softness of realization in his eyes—or something adjacent to that—and he swallowed tightly.
”I remember this.”
”Colby?” I heard my name next. I looked past Colby as Sam came up slowly. “What’s wrong? What happened?”
Those weren’t the questions I had, no.
I wondered, what did Colby remember?
Did he taste the familiarity in the air like I did?
Did he feel the cathartic peacefulness like I did?
Did he see the extra presence like I did?
We gathered our things and went into the dressing room to prepare for our three am seance.
”I’m thinking we could start soon,” Sam said softly. I checked my phone. 2:30am. “I know it’s early, but it’s already been so damn active. I bet Miss Johnson is with—“
The spirit box in his backpack turned on by itself.
”Yeah, she’s here,” Seth sighed, to which Colby burst out laughing. 
The lights were off. 
Five candles were around us as we placed the ouija board in the middle. A ring of salt encompassed us all. Colby sat nearly across from me; Sam in between us with Nate to my left and Seth in between him and Colby.
”The devices you guys have been playing with all night are around the room,” Sam announced. “You can mess with them if you’d like, but we would really appreciate communicating directly with one of you with this board.” He looked at us and we each put our fingers on the planchette. ”Did a spirit follow us in here?”
It took a few seconds, but the planchette moved to yes.
”Is this spirit Miss Johnson still?”
It didn’t move.
”Hi Miss Johnson, thanks for talking to us all night. Sorry if we’re being redundant—“
The planchette began to circle around the yes.
”Okay,” he laughed, and I couldn’t tell if he thought it was funny or he was intimidated. “We want to know more about the exact history of what went down in this room. Were you murdered in this room?” The planchette stayed on yes.
But then it drifted away. It slowly moved without motive.
“Do you know why you were murdered?” The planchette circled back to yes. “Were you murdered because the people in this house did not like that you were a medium?”
”Look—“ Nate said, and we watched as the planchette made its way to the letters.
S
I tried to rationalize if this was happening, because I absolutely wasn’t moving the wood. I looked at Colby. He looked at me from already examining Nate. I couldn’t look away from him. What a time to—
“T,” Sam mumbled.
What a time to fawn over him, how he looked under the dim candlelight, when I was supposed to be spooked from the presence of ghosts. I looked back at the board. My mouth went dry as it went to the third letter.
O
”Sam,” Colby mumbled in caution.
P
”It said stop.”
”Do you want us to close off this session?” Sam asked.
The planchette slowly made its way over to No.
”No?” He asked. “Do you want us to ask other questions…” His voice trailed off as the planchette moved on it’s own towards the letters again.
”I never asked,” Colby grumbled in frustration. “Is there a message you have for us?” The planchette went back to Yes.
We were quiet.
W E L C O—
“Are you spelling welcome?” Sam asked. The planchette went to Yes.
B A—
“Are you telling us ‘welcome back’ again?” The planchette pointed to No. “Who are you saying…”
C
Not this again. My tears burned my eyes this time, and they were glossy when I blinked.
O
What did it mean? What did welcome back mean? This spirit said Colby was here before death and then told me—
L
”Are you telling Colby, ‘welcome back?’”
The plachette landed on Yes, and I almost broke the rules and yanked my fingers from the board.
Then it started to spell out my name.
”No, no, no; don’t do that,” I cried. 
“Stay on,” Sam said sweetly. “It’s okay—We—I think we’re done here. I…”
S
O
”What the hell is it spelling now?” Seth asked.
”Are you giving us another name?” Sam asked. 
U
The planchette was determined to finish this word.
”Are you going to spell the name of the person who murdered you?” He pressed on.
L
T
”I…” Colby mumbled. I looked up and watched the words die in his throat. He, too, looked all too pale, and with the red and blue rem lights on him, they reflected his glassy eyes. I watched his throat; it was work for him to swallow.
Was he actually going to cry?
I
E
”Is someone remembering—“
”I know what it’s spelling,” Colby choked out. That was when Sam shut up and examined his best friend. 
S
“Soul-ties,” Seth whispered. It was like realization settled in for him as well, becasue the way his eyes widened and darted between Colby and I made me wish for the ground to swallow me up whole.
The planchette circled three times on the board for us.
“It—The ghosts just called you two soul-ties.”
Our fingers were off of it.
”Thank you for—“
”Colby,” I mumbled as he shot up. Sam closed out the seance just as Colby left the safety of our circle. I followed him out of the salt line and into the dimly lit hallway. “Colby.” He ignored me as he hesitantly made his way down the stairs. ”Colby,” I repeated firmer. “Colby, don’t leave me,” I choked. He stopped and looked up to where I was at the top of the stairs.
I walked down to him, and I swore, another life flashed before my eyes.
I didn’t know the man who stood in front of me, but I knew his eyes.
I didn’t know the blue dress on my body, but it was my body.
I looked back at Colby as I made it to the first floor. He didn’t take his gaze off of me for a second.
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”Oh my god,” Seth gasped as he ran a hand through his hair. “Before death, you were here. The ghost welcomed her back. “She—Miss Johnson literally just called you two soul-ties! It’s—oh my god—is reincarnation real?”
The daunting, jarring, death defying truth hung over us like a black cloud. The five of us looked at each other.
”What the fuck are we going to put in the video? Have you even been recording Sam?” Sam checked his camera even thoguh he looked so far from himself. 
“Yes,” he stuttered. “I-I have no idea what we’re going to say.”
”We can’t just tell them that reincarnation is real because we literally went to the house our best friend's owned in their past lives—“
“Shut up,” Colby burst out. “Just stop. Let us-Let us think for a second. Don’t say shit like that.” I looked at him. Offense must have been prevalent. ��We-We need to fucking talk or something, I know-I know the whole reincarnation thing is insane, but this-this is still our fucking lives too.”
”Yeah, no,” Seth sighed. “Totally. I know. Maybe we should pause for the night and chill out. Maybe we can take naps and order food.”
”You think they DoorDash here?” Sam scoffed at Nate. 
“I mean we can try.”
”I’m probably going to have to go pick it—“
I appreciated Sam diverting the attention from me and Colby, and he led the other two towards the kitchen. Colby didn’t take his eyes off of me.
”How believable is this for you?” I whispered. He only swallowed, blinked quickly. I wiped the tears from my face with the back of my sleeve, and then I paused when I noticed tear tracks on Colby’s face as well. “Let’s…” I started cautiously. Colby’s eyes slowly widened, but he didn’t stop me when I raised my hand to his face and wiped the last tears away. “Let’s just finish this investigation. Debrief, and we can sort things out later. We don’t want this video to go to waste.” He nodded but didn’t pull away from me. I couldn’t stop touching him either.
Forty minutes later, Sam and Colby came back with the food they picked up. 
Seth offered to go with Sam, but Colby pressed that he could do it. Seth didn’t fight it; we all knew. I would have done anything to be a fly on the wall of that car. What did they talk about? They had so much time to be alone. 
“I’m sorry for how this night turned out if it freaked you out or anything,” Seth said as he sat next to me on the sofa. I shook my head.
”No, I mean, yeah it’s weird. I’m not upset or anything,” I rushed. It felt nice that one of them started the conversation. Nate came into the room with bottles of water and gave one to each of us as well. He sat in the chair to my right. “I feel like I’m at the point now where I’m gaslighting myself. Like did it actually happen or there has to be some kind of explanation.” Nate nodded in agreement.
”Yeah, that seriously hits us hard everytime we finish an investigation, but then we pull out the footage and it’s like reliving it a second time. The moments that literally have no other explanation are a lot more easy to believe when it’s watched back because it’s like reconfirming in your head that it was real, you did see it, and you know it wasn’t staged or anything,” he said.
”I just feel like this is different,” I muttered.
”It really is,” Seth agreed. “I know it’s a lot more personal for you and Colby, but imagine if the Estes method session and the seance we did really was real; what does that have to say for the rest of the world? If it was real and we were talking to the real ghost of Miss Johnson, and she literally called you and Colby out by name and basically told you that you two lived here in your past lives; what the fuck does that mean for the rest of us?”
”Reincarnation could literally be real!” Nate gasped. “That’s such an insane thing to claim in a video! Wars literally start over religion.” He leaned back in his chair. “I’m just fucking relieved that I’m not the one who has to edit this post it.” We laughed at his joke because that was very much so fair. But my smile slowly fell.
Nate was right; he didn’t have to edit this footage. Sam and Colby would have to. 
Colby would edit this footage and he would be the one to ultimately decide what to do or say. That terrified me. I felt bad for him, because clearly both he and Sam were stressed as hell if they took an hour break by themselves. Sure, they picked up food for all of us, but they still went off alone and during a tense time.
What did they talk about?
Over dinner—or a 4am breakfast, I wasn’t quite sure anymore—we discussed what to do next. Maybe we got information about reincarnation and soul ties, but that wasn’t what we were here for.
”I just know we haven’t gotten anything about the murder,” I said in between bites. 
“That’s true,” Seth said. “Are you guys up to trying more?” He looked up at Sam and Colby, but his gaze lingered on Colby more.
”I am,” he said and then looked around. 
“Yeah, we definitely should try again to see if we can find out who killed her,” I said. Colby looked me in the eyes for the first time since the car ride with Sam.
A gentleness was in his eyes, and it replaced the fear and frantic thoughts. I needed to know what was said. Later. We would figure it out later.
”Awesome, would you guys be up for trying it in the dressing room again or should we try something down here?”
”Let’s try down here,” Seth answered Sam. “Clearly Miss Johnson is very active in the dressing room and she didn’t have much else to say other than what she already has. Maybe we can try to get another spirit.”
”But she’s the one who would know who killed her,” Colby said.
”I mean, they might have ghost meetings or something, I don’t fucking know. Also we’re close to the portal so maybe we can talk to another ghost not attached to the house.”
”Seth, if you want to go flirt with demons again, you could just say it,” Nate jeered.
”Shut the fuck up.”
It was settled. 
We placed the music box in the vortex and the rem pod on the other side of the house in between the sitting room and the back door. We left the backdoor open. The winter chill brushed in, and the clean air filtered that scent of familiarity lodged in my palate if only for a moment. 
It happened quickly. 
Since Miss Johnson was a medium, it was easy for her to communicate with us with each method. Within 30 minutes, we talked to multiple ghosts and narrowed down a few names that Angie talked to us about before. We all believed it was one of the maids close to Ada who murdered Miss Johnson for speaking about the baby. 
The maid knew that William and Ada had a baby too early; there wasn’t enough time in between their wedding and when the baby was born, so everyone would have known they would have had her before getting married. On top of that, due to the dangerous position he was in at his job, it made them a target. Because of everything, they kept the baby a secret and safe in the house. Even though she was presumably safe in the house, she was still murdered by someone. 
Miss Johnson told us that Ada believed it was someone in the house, but not too long after the child passed, William did as well. There wasn’t enough time between either death; she couldn’t figure out who did it, so she fired all of the servants in the house aside for her closest and personal maid. She wasn’t a part of the scheming.
When Miss Johnson came to work at the estate, it had been 20 years after William and the baby passed. They did a good job covering up the fact that they had a child and the fact that she was murdered under their own roof. Until Miss Johnson arrived.
”You’re telling me,” Seth started with a deep laugh of disbelief laced in his tone. He leaned forward in his seat. I sat on the sofa next to Nate who had his head leaned back on the rest, eyes closed, and arms folded—we couldn’t tell if he was asleep or not but we didn’t disturb him—and Sam and Colby did the Estes method in the middle of the sitting room. “That she literally outed a secret they had to keep in order to not lose everything they had? And she didn’t know?”
“Someone poisoned Will too; that’s what had to have happened. There were too many suspicious things happening for us to not rule that out,” Colby said.
“Ada was still alive and the maid still worked there,” Seth went on. “Which means that unless it was someone outside of the house, which looks very unlikely, it was the maid.”
”Or Ada herself,” Colby said quietly. His eyes were on me. My throat went dry. 
“Ada…” Seth said. Nate was suddenly awake.
”Ada herself killed Miss Johnson?” Sam asked. He still wiped the tears from his eyes from coming out of the headphones and blindfold.
The rem pod and the music box shilled to life.
I was pushed too far, worn too thin. The bathroom was too far. I was out of my seat and down the wooden stairs of the patio out back before I could blink. By the time I finished getting sick, Colby was behind me. I saw a flash of Sam on the patio before my tear filled eyes looked up at Colby. 
He didn’t blink. There was no real expression on his face aside from his attentive eyes. Then he slowly nodded. Tongue dampened his lips in thought
“Ada stabbed Miss Johnson 36 times because…” His words faded. I wondered how I looked. I could feel how pale I was.
”Inside—Come inside guys,” Sam rushed with a nervous shake in his voice. It was freezing out here. Colby didn’t even flinch.
The words went unsaid but not unnoticed.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—“
”No, no,” Colby said gently to Sam as he turned back to the house. The grass poked my ankles over my vans and my socks soaked up the early morning dew. My eyes scanned the fields. The water over a hundred yards from us was still as a mirror; the faded starlight bounced off. The sky already reflected a lighter blue. “It’s not you at all. Hold on a second.”
Sam went back into the house. They left the door open. Colby turned to me.
”Reincarnation isn’t real, Colby,” I muttered roughly. An eyebrow shot up.
”Yeah,” he scoffed. “You believe it isn’t real now but only because you think you wouldn’t murder anyone.” 
“It-It wasn’t me—“
”Maybe, but in this lifetime, your daughter wasn’t murdered in front of you.” Chills fell down my body like a cold rain when he spoke those words. I couldn’t look away from him even as the tears broke. “And your husband wasn’t poisoned right after.”
“Fuck,” I gasped breathlessly. “This is real, isn’t it?” Colby swallowed. His eyes scanned the expanse of land around us. It took a while, and the more seconds that passed, the more I knew it confirmed my statement.
”Do you not remember running across this grass and jumping in the lake?” 
Like a train engine, the memory crashed into me and I almost fell off my feet. The hot Texas summer sun burned my skin, but I kept my eyes on… a man. Colby; his eyes looked back at me, and before I could drown in them, we broke the surface of the water. 
I looked at Colby in front of me. Moonlight reflected in his expectant eyes.
The seconds ticked by. I could feel them in the warming wind, in the dimming stars.
”Who’s going to believe us?”
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That morning, as we met in a diner with coffees and a basket of fries since we weren’t hungry enough for a full meal yet, I tried my hardest to debrief and be in the conversations with the boys. But how could I? Information was revealed and things happened with no other explanation tonight, and Colby’s silence was telling. Did he believe it? Or did he not want to?
The others must have felt the tension and thank god they didn’t feel awkward and carried the conversation easily. 
I wasn’t ready for confrontation. Thinking about where I stood with Colby by myself in my own head was enough confrontation. Of course Sam didn’t realize. Or maybe he did and that was why when we got back to the hotel—when the sunlight shot across the awakening city and burned our night infested eyes—he finally mentioned the elephant in the room.
”Honestly,” he mumbled as we neared the elevator. Nate and Seth were ahead of us speaking quietly. Colby slowly looked at him, and I avoided his gaze because it was too serious. All knowing. “I’ll stay with Nate and Seth tonight.”
I wanted to scream no please don’t leave me but another terrifying feeling pulled my other arm.
”Okay,” Colby simply said and that was that. 
A well of excitement and fear and curiosity overflowed within me.
The three boys got off first and thank the heavens the other two didn’t mention Sam getting off with them. The elevator doors shut, and before they sealed, I stole one more glance at Sam who looked back at me already. His comforting eyes warmed my entire body and then Colby and I were alone.
I wasn’t breaking the silence until he did.
We left the elevator—only two floors from the other three—and I decided it was the longest elevator ride I had ever taken. My vision pounded with anticipation as we neared our room. He unlocked the door and led me inside.
I recoiled at the ever soft gleam in his eyes. I tried to forget that it looked like it was work for him to turn away from me.
“Let’s-Let’s just relax first.” I nodded. Maybe I couldn’t break the silence. At least I knew that he wanted to have the conversation with me.
I washed my makeup off. Colby brushed his teeth. We both stood at the double sinks. It took everything within me to not glance at his reflection. I saw the tension under his skin. Maybe he fought the feeling as well. Or maybe he felt my tension. He couldn’t be uncomfortable alone with me, no. He would have told Sam not to leave. 
My throat tangled within itself when Colby walked from the bathroom into the bedroom and took his shirt off at the same time. I looked back at my reflection and thank god he continued around the corner to his luggage so that he wouldn’t see my wide eyes glaze over.
Either the universe is out for blood or Colby sent a message with that move.
After I braided my hair, I too left the bathroom and flicked off the lights. The silence was comfortable but it wasn’t peaceful. Intangible questions netted between us, I knew that much, and from the way his eyes narrowed on the things he messed with in his backpack as I took off my clothes, I wondered how much speaking we could get done tonight. Unless we could communicate without words. Maybe I got ahead of myself. 
I didn’t even think about facing him at all. Everyone changed in front of each other—at least just shirts and pants—like it was a regular thing. It was a regular thing for us, but this was substantially above that. The intimacy shook my breath and I hoped he didn’t hear the way my breath hitched as I pulled on an oversized shirt to sleep in. 
He charged camera batteries while replacing them with new batteries and SD cards. He didn’t go over footage with me like he typically did. When was this ever a typical night though? 
I stood on my side of the bed after plugging in my phone, and I must have felt him turn towards me because I too faced him. He was on the other side of the bed. As badly as I wanted to look away from his eyes—as badly as I wanted to gaze down the rest of his body—I kept my focus on the way his eyes didn’t defocus from mine.
“How do you feel?” I could curl up in his voice forever if he always spoke that way to me. I nodded my head before I replied.
”Fine, I’m-I’m fine.” He nodded.
”Tonight was a lot.” I nodded again.
”It was.”
”Are you upset?” I shook my head. I wished I could speak. I wanted to, so badly, but not a constructive word came to me. “I—I had no idea—“
”It’s okay,” I rushed out. “Are you upset?’
”No,” he quickly said. “Not at all.”
My heart leapt.
“Every time you spoke, the ghosts in the house freaked out. You were like-like a beacon for me, or something.” I recounted the events that took place. It was true. When I spoke, noises happened. Ada touched my hair. When I spoke, the devices were loud.
With him, I wondered what would happen in the future. Who else could aid him like I could?
”Come here.” I walked over to his side of the bed. His eyes were on my body, I felt the heaviness, but I didn’t look up to him. I would have fallen. Then I looked up to him and stood there. He looked back at me but didn’t say anything. 
When his hand reached up and touched my face, I needed to make sure he wouldn’t panic and pull away so I leaned into it. He released a heavy breath.
“I…” He stopped himself. 
Then he said my name.
”Say whatever you want,” I told him. I needed him to say it. Say anything at all; I didn’t care how cut-throat it was. I needed everything aired out.
“I didn’t,” he shook his head. “I thought I was crazy for feeling like I already knew you when I met you for the first time.”
The walls crumbled around me. I couldn’t catch my breath. I didn’t like how much time I wasted and left his words alone in the air. 
“Colby—“
”You don’t—I know—you don’t have to feel—”
”No, Colby, that’s—I was trying to ignore it all this time.” Realization washed over him and I couldn’t stop from smiling.
”You-You feel the same way then?” I nodded quickly. 
“Did you think I would have reacted the way I did when that board said we were soultied? You remembered the memory I had of us in the lake, right? Why do you think I’m on the verge of believing it?” An uneven breath escaped from his mouth as if he held onto it for too long. 
With a shake of the head, he grabbed my face, and kissed me. The intensity of it all was unbearable. I couldn’t hold my ground, not when it felt like all our pieces fit together for the first time.
My hands grabbed him. It was so hard to hold onto him when he didn’t wear a shirt. I wanted him in every way, and I knew he wanted me, but how fast was too fast? So I wrapped my arms around his neck. If I grabbed him anywhere else, I knew it would be the end.
It would be a death wish because after he touched me once, only death could separate us.
“Do you even know?” His voice—a quiet breath that sent chills across my heated skin—knocked the wind out of me. How was the room so silent? The pounding of my heart could have filled its walls. “You know how hard it was for me to not kiss you everytime I just—god—I just fucking looked at you?” I swallowed tightly at the confession. His hands on my face held me, and he still pressed kisses to my mouth, across my face. It was hard to stay still. How could we when this realization was bone deep?
Even if I didn’t know whether or not I believed in reincarnation, the desperation in my fascia was evident enough.
”And even if it would have ruined what we had already, it would have been worth it.” 
“How do you know I didn’t want you back?” I gasped when his lips slipped down my throat. He laughed.
”I thought you could have, but I definitely didn’t want to risk it.” I kissed him this time, and he gasped with the amount of force I used against him. His arms fell down my body and held me so tightly he lifted me.
”I didn’t realize I needed you,” I gasped.
“I need you too. You think I’ll be able to continue doing what we do without you? You—We literally share the share the same soul. You’re the part of me that I’m not.”
“So you’re the part of me I’m not?” My voice broke when he let go of me.
”Come on.” I could have collapsed into that dark tone. He spun around so that his back was to the bed and he pulled me onto his lap. His eyes were wide and beckoning; I rested my arms around his neck, and I couldn’t even lean in to kiss him. I sat there as his hands raced up my back without even pulling me. 
He must have seen it too; something in me that was similar to what I saw in him.
He kissed me first, but I pushed him down. I needed him so close to me that I probably wouldn't be satisfied until the laws of physics were broken. The first time I rolled my hips into his, he left out a satisfied hum, and his hands moved to my hips and guided them back and forth gently. 
I knew we still had clothes on, so how did it feel this good? I tried to kiss him but I couldn’t. My hand was still on his face, thumb linked under his chin now, and I couldn’t help myself. My other hand slipped down his skin and touched every inch of it that was exposed. My legs were so weak I should have fallen to my front already, but he held me up. As much as I moved, and as much as I touched him, he had control. He held me, moved me, kissed me, tasted me, and let me have my fun.
Or maybe he was as stretched thin as I. Maybe he needed this like I did, and maybe no one had the control or the fun. I didn’t do anything except follow his lead just as he followed mine. When I kissed him, he kissed back. When I pulled his pants off, my shirt hit the floor with them. 
My body vibrated above him. It wasn’t a secret. Now that I was fully uncovered aside from my underwear, he could see it, not just feel it. I didn’t think twice about not wearing a bra to sleep even if I shared a room with the boys because never in their lives have they given me a reason to distrust them or doubt them. But now, a heated blush fell down my face and neck as I sat above him exposed. 
“Here—“ His breathless voice made my heart jump again. His hand lowered in between my legs, and my eyes closed quickly or else he would have seen them roll back. “Does it feel good, baby?” 
“Colby,” I moaned. He closed his eyes, and again, his body tensed under his skin. I didn’t realize how much of an effect I had on him. “You-You really want to do this? Now?” Then his eyes snapped open with caution.
”Do you not want to?” I shook my head quickly.
”No, I do. I really want to. I just didn’t know if it was too fast.”
”It’s not too fast for me. I’ve wanted you for so long. If it’s too fast for you then we don’t—“
”No, it’s not.” He smiled; eyebrows twinged with confusion.
”Then why did you say that?” 
“I’m not sure.” His eyes fell down my body. Fingers played with my braid that now loosely hung over my shoulder.
”Did someone say something?”
”No,” I gasped. Because it slowly crept up on me. “I think-I think I’m so scared.” His eyes snapped back up to mine.
”Of what?”
”How much I feel for you. I need you, Colby, and if either of us fucks this up I—I don’t know what I’d do.” He shook his head.
”I can’t—There’s no doubt in my mind that we won’t work out.” 
“How can you be so sure?” He hesitated. Wetted his lips.
”Did you not see how much I believed it as well? I didn’t even question it.” My eyes widened. He was the only thing in the room. Everything around us faded to black; only him. “Did you-Did you not feel the same way I did in that house?” I shook my head quickly.
”No-No, I did. I felt—I didn’t think you did.”
”Fuck,” he gasped, I forgot I still grinded down on him. “I-I felt it immediately when we walked in.”
”Me too.”
I broke eye contact first. And it was an accident. I couldn’t simply be on top of him like this, both of us half naked, and not take in his appearance. His hands replaced themselves on my hips as my hands dragged across his skin. 
“Fuck—“ I heard him gasp and I looked back at him. His eyes closed and lips parted with pleasure. So of course I thrusted my hips again and again. I would do anything to see that face as long as possible. 
“Need to feel you,” I whined as my fingers pushed past the band of his underwear.
”You already can.” I glared at him. A stupid smile pulled at his dark lips.
”I want you in me.” He couldn’t joke anymore. That smile fell and he didn’t break eye contact as we pulled his underwear off. I said I needed to see that face as much as possible.
He gasped and moaned my name sweetly as his head tipped back. I stroked him slowly and watched every expression across his face. I couldn’t look away; at that point, it became an addiction.
”Come on,” he moaned. He lifted himself up again. “Take—Let me take this off.” His hands were rougher. This time my body tensed when he touched me. His hands yanked down my underwear and he quickly tugged me back on his lap.
He stayed sitting still and his hands held my hips in place.
”Want you to ride me baby, can you do that?”
“Yes—“ I didn’t mean to whine, to sound so out of it already, but I couldn’t believe what was happening. I couldn’t believe it had gotten to this point; that this was our reality now. He was my reality now, and nothing could tear him from it.
My arms rested around his neck as he looked up at me. I was glad I could hold myself up; his hands found my hips and moved my body because I was so far gone from myself. The second I felt him against me, I pulled my hips back so that I could grind on him and not let him slip inside yet. 
“Oh my god,” he gasped as his eyes closed in surprise. My moans mixed with his as he guided me against him. Everytime he tried to take me further, I pulled away. I knew it was mean, maybe a little fun to tease him, but it felt too good to not drag it out for a little while. “Come on,” he whispered.
”Impatient?” I asked. He glared up at me.
”Could you imagine if this was all real for a second?” I tried. But then he went on: “If it is true and we’re soul tied and reincarnation is real, that means I haven’t fucked you for like 160 years or something—“
”Oh my god!” I burst out laughing. “Not you trying to use the soul tie to get inside me—Colby!” 
It felt like the wind was knocked out of me when he pulled me down on him. My hands held onto him, neck and arm, as he filled me to the brim. His eyes carefully watched my face even as I writhed with pleasure. 
“Oh my god, holy fuck—“ The words poured out of me laced with my moans, and he moaned loudly as he grabbed my hips and moved me up and down with him. I held his face with my hands so that he couldn’t look away, and I had no capacity to kiss him, so my thumb pulled at his bottom lip. He looked up at me like he was glued to me; completely hexed in my gaze. 
Finally coming to my senses again, I rolled my hips against him, and his eyes rolled back.
”Baby,” he sighed. “You feel so damn good,” his moan broke into uneven laughs.
”You feel better,” I whispered. “Look so good.” 
“Fuck, I need you.”
”I know,” I whined. “I need you harder.”
The words were hardly off my tongue when he flipped me over. I squealed when my back hit the bedding. He stood to the floor and pressed my knees back. Fire spread through my body when he thrusted against me. I tried to look down and watch when he drenched his tip through my fluids and teased me to hell and back.
���No, please inside—“
”Are you so impatient? It feels so good, doesn’t it?” Humiliation welled in my stomach at the disgustingly sweet tone in his voice. His fingers gouged into the flesh of my legs, and I held onto the blankets below me.
”Please, need you—”
”You sound so sweet for me, baby,” he teased with a light tone. “Did you not just do this to me?”
”Now am I supposed to tell you that I’ve waited for a hundred years for you to be inside—“ The wind was knocked out of me again when he thrusted inside of me, as deep as he could. “Colby,” I whispered his name. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t moan or say anything at all.
”Oh my—“ his eyes rolled back and he gasped another moan. Maybe his fingers left bruises in between my thighs, and maybe they even bled into crescent moons, but I didn’t care. The pain grounded me and reminded me that he was real. He was here for me, with me, in me; something inside of me screamed finally.
”Mine,” I gasped. I didn't know where it came from. A kind of primal possession washed over me when I looked at him. His eyebrows raised in surprise.
”What?” He gasped. “Mine? You think I’m yours, baby?”
”Yes—“ I coughed. “I’m yours.” He breathlessly moaned and leaned over me.
”Yeah, you’re mine too,” he groaned and kissed me bitterly. His teeth, his tongue, his lips burned as I bit back. And his hand found my throat. It was so difficult for both of us at this angle, and with a frustrated groan, he pulled back, grabbed me by the thighs again and lifted me to lay back on the pillows normally. 
I gasped as I hit the bed, my hands still holding onto him. One of my legs hooked over his arm as his other hand held my throat again. It didn’t hurt, I could still breathe and see; it was to anchor my gaze on his. 
“Mine,” he whispered. “You’re so mine, mine forever.” 
He didn’t stop. It built and built under my skin until I had to close my eyes. My fingers made marks in his skin everywhere I touched him. I needed to curl up under his skin, I needed to be closer even if it was impossible. 
“Yeah, are you baby?” I didn’t even realize I moaned still. It wound up inside of me, and he undid me faster than I could hold onto. “Want to come with me?”
”Please—“ I gasped and my eyes opened. He kissed me, his lips breaking skin below my chin, down my neck. “Close,” I said. It must have been a repeat.
”Oh my god, I’m going to,” he warned, and my hands found his neck, his hair again. I looked down between us, and his hand grabbed onto my waist. I was suffocated with the view of our bodies together, and I couldn’t even blink as he lost himself inside of me.
”Colby—“ I gasped, and so powerfully, my climax also came over me. He gasped and hesitated at the pressure, and he held me down to keep himself up. “No,” I somehow whined through my pleasure. I grabbed him and brought him down on me. I needed him close. 
And he slowed. 
My nails tore across the skin of his back, not enough to leave marks anymore, but enough for us to feel. Then, when he caught his breath, he left gentle kisses across my skin. I gasped as he slowly pulled out of me.
He grabbed a towel from the bathroom before he sat in between my legs.
”Colby—“ I went to stop him, but as he cleaned me, he kissed down my thigh. I hummed with satisfaction as he touched me, loved me.
”I’m still unsure if this is real or not,” he said when he raised to his knees again.
”Yeah,” I sighed a heavy breath. “Me too. If,” I let my mind wander. “If we’re soul tied, what does that mean for us? How easy for us will it be to communicate with spirits, then?” His eyes clicked up to me.
“That’s-That’s really interesting, actually. We need to test it out. As far as I saw today, though, when you were there, you like ushered in the most activity.”
“It could just be because I shared the same spirit with one of the ghosts there.” His eyes brows relaxed in thought. Then, they drifted back up to me.
”If it is real and we aren’t insane, then that means you brutally murdered a woman for me and our baby.” My eyes relaxed and glazed over. I watched him and my heart skipped a hot beat in my chest. 
Him, our baby.
”And I’d do it again.”
✧˖*°࿐
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lizslibrary · 1 month
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Mirror
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Summary: Reader is Bucky's next-door neighbor when they hear him having a nightmare. Reader helps him see his reflection in the mirror and reminds him that his scars are beautiful because they are proof that he survived.
A/N: Thank you guys so much for the support on my last story, It gave me the courage to write a second one. The last fic I wrote was done in the first person so I thought I would try my hand in second person to see how it goes. Please let me know of any compliments or criticism that you have, it would really help a lot! 🤍
Warnings: Nightmare, PTSD, Bucky being insecure, self-deprivation (Bucky,) Crying, hurt/comfort.
Word count: 1339.
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You awoke to the sound of screaming from across the hall, it didn't take long to figure out Bucky was having another nightmare. You prop yourself up on one elbow, rubbing your eyes as you adjust to being awake. Forcing yourself out of your bed, you open your door and step into the dimly lit hallway of your apartment building. You gently raise your fist and knock on Bucky's apartment door, hoping he'll answer.
Not long after, the door creaks open and Bucky stands in the doorway looking disheveled and tired. He was wearing loose sweatpants, and his skin was gleaming with sweat. his eyes reddened and brimmed with tears yet to be spilled. You stare at him for a moment noticing how his long hair is sticking to the sides of his face, and how there were dark smudges under each eye.
"Bucky?" You say softly, almost as if he was a bomb waiting to detonate. "Can I come in?"
Bucky nods quietly, holding the door open a little wider. I look around noticing how messy his apartment is. Pillows and blankets were on the ground, and his boots were on two separate sides of the room, one leaning against the TV stand, while the other was in the corner. The only furniture in the room was a small, grey couch and a little coffee table that sat between the TV and the sofa.
Bucky stared at you silently, his eyes were dark. "I'm sorry I woke you." He said, his voice low and shaky.
You shook your head "Don't worry about it Bucky, it wasn't your fault." You say gently, sitting down on his couch and gesturing for him to sit next to you. "Are you okay?"
Bucky shakes his head, running his fingers through his hair "No" He says quietly, closing his eyes. "They won't stop, every time I try to sleep these nightmares keep coming back."
Your heart began to ache at the thought of Bucky suffering through these awful nightmares, night after night. You recall all the times when he would wake you up screaming, telling you how he had just dreamt about Hyrda, about how these visions of death and violence constantly haunt him.
"You don't deserve this Bucky." You say, observing the way he covered himself up with a blanket.
Bucky turned to face you "I'm a monster..." he said lowly. He opened his mouth but no words came out. Bucky closed his eyes tightly, and tears fell freely from his cheeks.
"No Bucky, you're not." You say, gently placing your hand over his shaking one. "Bucky, you've done nothing wrong, none of this is your fault."
He looked away from you, eyes falling to the floor "I know, but I still did it."
You sigh "Buck, listen to me." You say, keeping your voice gentle. "You were being brainwashed and manipulated. They made you do horrible things that you had no control over."
Bucky remained silent, letting out a deep breath before looking at you. "They ruined me Y/n, my body is filled with ugly scars." He said pulling the blanket tighter around his shoulders. "When I go out in public little people, children even, are scared of my arm...It just reminds me of my past and what I've done." He says softly "Hydra ruined me."
You place your hand on his blanket-covered back slowly making circles with my fingernails. "Bucky, you are the kindest most handsome man I've ever met, your past does not define your present." You say, "You have gone out of your way to protect and take care of me even before we became close."
His cheeks tinted pink "Y/n...thank you." He whispered, taking a deep breath "But-"
You stop him "No buts Bucky." You say firmly "Can I show you the Bucky that I see?" You take his hand, pulling the blanket off his back, and leading him gently into the bathroom turning him so that he can see his reflection in the mirror.
"What do you see when you look at yourself?" You ask, keeping your voice soft.
Turning his head away from the mirror, Bucky swallowed hard. His chest rose and fell rapidly as he took a deep breath. "Scars..." He mumbled, unable to meet your gaze.
You nod, rubbing his back "Anything else?"
Bucky peers back to the mirror, his eyes landing on the scar tissue that connects his shoulder to his vibranium arm, he clenches his jaw and grips the sink tightly.
Your gaze is soft as you watch Bucky look at himself, with sorrow and pain. He doesn't reply as he turns away from the mirror, dropping his head in shame.
"Listen to me bucky..." You say, standing next to him in the mirror "Your scars are beautiful."
He glances up at you "How could they possibly be?" He asks, fighting back the tears that welled in his eyes.
You smile warmly "Because you fought your way out of hell, you persevered through torture and you lived; they are a reminder that you survived." You tell him, your eyes never leaving his. "You are the strongest, most beautiful man I have ever met." You say, turning to face him.
Bucky wipes his eyes quickly, inhaling sharply. He stares at you a moment before letting out a deep breath "Thank you..." He whispers, averting his eyes once more.
You squeeze his hand lightly "You don't have to thank me." You say softly. "You deserved to hear it."
Bucky stares down at you, his glossy eyes filled with gratitude, before wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you into a tight hug. You wrap your arms around him in return, feeling the tension seep from his body. He sniffles "I don't deserve you doll." He whispers, bringing his forehead to rest against your shoulder.
"No, you deserve more."
You weren't sure why, but you felt like you needed to be persistent in reminding him that he was worthy of love and affection, regardless of what happened in his past.
"You're the best thing that has ever happened to me." He breathes, bringing his hand up to your head and running his fingers through your hair.
With a contented sigh, you let your fingers glide over Bucky's skin, tracing his muscles and spine. He shudders under your touch, tightening his grip around your waist. He leans into you, his forehead resting on yours.
"It feels good to hold you." He murmurs, pushing his nose against your cheek.
You smile against his chest "That's sweet Bucky, feels good to hold you too" You murmur.
Bucky lets out a soft chuckle, a light tickle brushing against your ear. You reach up, running your hand through his silky hair, gently combing it out of his eyes. You tilt his head up so that his eyes meet your own.
"Are you ready to go back to bed?" You say, staring into his eyes. You could tell that he was tired, his pale blue eyes looking dull and heavy.
He nods slowly, resting his chin against your shoulder before pulling away and walking into his room "Yeah." He mutters.
You turn around, walking back into the bedroom. As you shut the door behind you, you hear Bucky sigh as he climbs onto his bed. You walk over to the bed and sit down, facing Bucky.
He closes his eyes and lets out a long exhale "Thanks for talking to me sweetheart...You didn't have to stay up this long." He says, his voice cracking slightly.
You run your fingers through his hair "Don't worry about it Bucky, I wanted to." You say, leaning forward and kissing his forehead "Goodnight."
Bucky stares at you, looking at you as if he is trying to memorize every feature.
"Y/n?" He asks barely audible.
"Yeah?"
"Can you stay here tonight?" He says, his voice hoarse.
A small smile appears as you walk to the other side of the bed and gently crawl under the covers. immediately, Warmth envelops you as you settle into the blankets. You take a deep breath, feeling the heat from Bucky's body beneath the blankets. You lean forward, bringing your lips to his temple.
"Goodnight Buck." You murmur.
"Sweet dreams, sweetheart," he whispers softly, drawing you close to his chest as he drifts into the first peaceful sleep he has had in years.
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samandcolbyownme · 2 months
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This was originally going to be just a Sam one shot, but then i decided to make it a Sam and Colby one shot. I felt like Sam's cover was too good to change, so enjoy the buy one get one free deal lol.
Summary: Reader drives herself insane trying to think of this mystery man she cannot stop thinking about and completely caught off guard when there's two of them.
Warnings: SMUT18+, vampire!Sam, demon!colby, compulsion and mind reading from both Sam and Colby, mentions of blood and blood drinking, strong language, mentions of alcohol, reading feeling like they're going insane, hair pulling, biting, scratching, choking, fingering, oral (m&f rec), threesome w/ dp, dirty and cute pet names, unprotected sex, creampie, filth
Word count: 10.3k | NOT edited
Not a request
Bold italics are Sam and Colby speaking in readers head.Regular italics are scenes they create in her head & reader being compelled at times.
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Have you ever tried moving on from something that hasn't necessarily happened, but no matter how hard you tried, you just can't?
Your mind, constantly replaying stuff in your dreams, random times throughout the day.
Hitting you when you least expect it?
Then, when you finally think you've gotten over it, gotten rid of the haunting thoughts, it comes back, stronger than it was before?
That was you. Right now.
You had this feeling of anxiety, feeling like something was going to happen. It's happened multiple times a day, even causing you to wake up in the middle of the night, sometimes gasping for air.
But, you can never remember your dreams and nothing ever happens.
You could never describe the feeling.
Your friends would ask if you're okay because you looked 'tired' or you said no to doing something you always have said yes to.
They knew something was up, and so did you, but you just didn't know what was causing you to feel like this so it was always 'I didn't sleep well last night' or some other lame excuse that they could see right through.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Your friend, Cami asks, "You've been, not sleeping well, for the last week or so." She tilts her head, "What's really going on?"
You take a deep breath, "I honestly.." you pause, leaning forward to set your coffee mug down on the coffee table, "If I tell you, you have to promise not to call me crazy."
She nods, leaning back against the couch, "Okay."
You pinch the bridge of your nose, "So besides me not sleeping well, I'll get to that in a sec, but it started last week, after we came home from Tara's party."
"Did someone h-"
You cut her off, "No. no. It's not that."
She sighs, "Oh fuck, okay good." She motions, "Continue. Sorry."
You bat the air, "When I came home I felt like I was forgetting something, but I had everything I took with. I also felt.. I don't know, almost guilty for going and having a good time? Like, almost like I shouldn't have gone? I'd don't know."
She furrows her brows, "That doesn't make any senses. I mean, I just.." she stops, "it sounds like you're feeling emotions you'd feel when you're with someone and you did something you know they don't like."
You shrug, "I mean, yeah. It kind of does feel that way, but at the same time if I really think about it, it still doesn't make sense. I mean, maybe I think about it way too much, but-"
She cuts you off, "Are you talking to anyone? Maybe someone who is a potential boyfriend and you felt bad for going out?"
You look up at her, "That's where it gets crazy."
She gives you a weird look, "Huh?"
"I feel like- okay. You promised not to call me crazy, so just.. hear me out." You stare at her and she nods and you continue trying to explain, "I feel like.. I already belong to someone."
She makes a face and you hold your hand up, "I know. I know. I just, I can't. I can't explain it really. I mean, I keep seeing this person in my dreams and it almost feels like they're who I'm-"
You shake your head, "That sounds absolutely fucking insane. I take back what I said, you can call me crazy."  
You laugh, slightly embarrassed at what you just said.
This is the first time that you've actually talked about it out loud, and it sounds a lot crazier than you originally had thought.
"You're into reading books, right?" Cami asks and you nod, "Yeah, I'm actually reading one right now."
"What's it about?" She brings her legs up, moving the blanket to cover up. You purse your lips, "It's a darker romance book, so it's basically about a guy who comes at the most random times but he has a big secret and all that."
"What's he described as? Like what does he look like?" She brings her mug to her face and you shrug, "Um. I mean, like a normal looking guy. Slightly tall-ish. Blue eyes. At first he had brown hair, then he bleaches it to blonde, what does-"
"Who's the guy you see in your dreams?"
You stare at her, "Oh shit."
She chuckles, "I don't know about you, and now when I say this, I speak from experience because I'm sure we've all have done it, but it sounds like you're experiencing fictophilia."
"What the hell is that?" You laugh slightly at the last word she said, "fictophilia?"
She nods, "Yeah, it's where people, real people like us, fall in love with fictional characters in a book."
"Can it be as strong as taking over how you feel?" You ask, tilting your head, "Because when I tell you, I could have puked from feeling guilty that night, I was-" you hold up your thump and pointed, an inch from each other, "-This close."
She shakes her head, "No, I don't think it can cause that. I think you just drank a little, too much." She smirks, "Those back to back shots definitely had something to do with it."
You sigh, closing your eyes as you nod, "Yeah, yeah no. You're probably right. I'm just definitely over thinking about it."
"And the not getting sleep will definitely play a part in that. You need to take a nap. A real nap." She smirks, "and stop being delusional."
You roll your eyes, smirking as you nod, "Yeah, yeah. I know. But these fictional men, Cami. They'll getcha."
She nods as she stands up, "No I know. I watched a movie the other day and thought about the one character for three days straight."
"See. My point exactly." She laugh as you walk her over to the door. She turns, "I don't think you're crazy. Fictional characters happen to us all."
She leans in for a hug, "But if it gets to the point to where you tell me you're dating someone who isn't real, I'm funny farming your ass."
You laugh, leaning back as you look at her, "I won't put up a fight."
You close the door after she walks out, turning around to look at your empty apartment. You flick the lock before you walk over to the couch, sitting down to switch on the tv.
You put on the show you were watching and you can't help but think about your conversation with Cami.
It felt like so much more than what you told her.
It felt too real, but you really didn't want her to think you were losing it. That you were crazy.
But you felt it.
After multiple days of trying to figure out who the guy in your dreams is and not having any clue whatsoever is maddening.
Constantly telling yourself, I'm going crazy, each time you try hard to remember his face and about lose it because you can't.
You have a feeling that he wasn't just the guy in the book.
He was so much more than that, to you, in your head at least.
But, little did you know, that he was a creature who had such a pretty face, a dark, dark soul - along with his friend.
You shake your head, laying down and getting comfortable on the couch so you can try and take a well needed nap.
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
You reach over the counter, smiling at the barista, "Thank you." She nods, moving on to hand out the next coffee.
You walk away, heading towards the door. You go to push it open but stumble out when someone on the outside opens it before you.
"Oh, shit." The guy lays an arm in front of you, stopping your stumble. You stand up straight, looking up at the blonde.
He smiles slightly, "Are you okay? I'm sorry. I didn't see you coming out."
You nod, laughing slightly, "Y-yeah. Yeah I'm okay. Thank you for opening the door for me." You smile at him and he shrugs, "Call it fate."
A loud thump causes you to jump awake. You sit up, slowly turning to look back over the couch. You blink a few times, trying to get your vision used to the darkness of your apartment.
You call out slight groggy, "Hello?"
No answer.
Your phone ringing causes you to jump and you let out a sigh as you look at it. You debated on not answering, mainly because you seen the movies.
You know how it goes.
But it was cami, so you answer, "Hello?"
"Hey, a bunch of us are going out tonight. Wanna join?" She asks, "We're going to bar hop." You bite your lip, quickly turning around when you feel a presence off to your left, "Uh, yeah. Yeah."
"You'll come?" She asks, excitement seeping from her words, "Great. We can all just meet up in the parking lot of your place and we can walk to Bar Eight."
"That's fine with me. I need a shower, I just woke up from a nap." You stretch your arm above your head, "you can come over whenever. I'll be here."
"I have to finish getting ready, too but I'll be over within the hour."
"Okay." You nod to yourself, "See ya." You pull the phone away from your ear and stand up. You walk over to the lamp, switching it on and from the corner of your eye, you can see a figure disappear.
"Oh fucking hell." You rub your eyes and sigh. You mentally tell yourself that it's the sleep deprivation or that you just need to distract yourself.
Maybe having people stay over after a night out will help.
You walk to the bathroom, switching the shower on and it quickly fills with steam. You undress, stepping in and sighing as the hot water washes over your body.
It feels like hands slid over your shoulders and you zone out.
You're walking down the street with Cami, having a small conversation. You're oblivious to the people walking towards you on the left side of the side walk.
Someone runs into your shoulder, knocking your purse off. It falls to the ground and some of your things spill out.
As you bend down, what you assume, is the guy who bumped into you, bends down to help you.
"Here. Let me help."
You look up, tucking hair behind your one ear as your eyes meet a guy with dark hair and blue eyes, "Oh, um. Thank you."
He nods, handing you the strap of your bag, "No need, I should watch where I'm going more often."
You laugh slightly, "Yeah, that probably wouldn't be a bad idea." He stands up and holds his hand out. You felt oddly trusting of him, so you take his hand to stand up.
"I'm Colby." He smiles and you nod, "I'm y/n."
You turn around quickly, wiping the water from your face as you only remember the hands on your shoulders, "what the fuck!"
You pull the shower curtain back, peaking out as if that was the smartest thing to do, "Go away."
Nothing in response.
You lean back into the shower and fix the curtain before doing your routine. As you're rising the conditioner out of your hair, you feel like there's eyes on you.
Like someone is watching.
You finish up, quicker than you thought, and step out.
You tilt your head at the neatly folded towel on the corner of the counter and stare at it, "Did I do that?"
You think hard but can't remember.
You grab it, snapping it open so you can wrap up your hair and put the other one around your body. You open the bathroom door, and nothing else seems out of ordinary as you step out.
You turn, walking into your room and going to your closet. You shift through the hangers, finding a cute top and a pair of ripped jeans.
You toss the towel down, quickly getting dressed before taking your hair down.
A very faint, she's so pretty, causes you to snap your head towards the door, "Cami?" You slowly scrunch your hair in the towel and shake your head, it's just the tv.
After a while, there's a knock on your door and you get up to go open it, "Hey guys. Come in." You smile as Cami and your other friends walk in, greeting you with smiles.
"I just need to grab my bag then I'm ready." You walk into your room, grabbing your purse and turning to walk out when you suddenly stop.
You don't know why you stop, but you just do.
Your mind goes blank for a second and then suddenly you're walking back out to your friends like nothing just happened, "Okay. I'm ready."
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
"So do you come here often?"
You try not to roll your eyes at the cringey, overused pickup line, "I mean.. kind of?" You laugh slightly and sip your drink, "I only live a few minutes away."
Why would you say that? You don't know him.
Your brows furrow, "That was weird."
"What was weird?" The guy still standing infront of you asks, making you realize that you now just thought out loud, "Um, nothing. Nothing sorry. Continue."
"No." He laughs, "I like weird shit, tell me."
You sigh, smirking slightly, "Do you ever.. how do I say this." He shrugs with a smile, "Just say it."
"Do you ever feel like there's someone in your head but it's not you?" The words roll off your tongue and you instantly regret it, "Wait. No. That sounds awful."
He shakes his head, "No I know exactly what you mean."
No he doesn't.
You close your eyes, "Almost like it's someone trying to talk to you, but it's just.." you laugh, "Confusing. Weird. I don't know."
The guy nods, "I'm so glad someone else thinks the same as me."
You smile and that feeling hits again. Like you shouldn't be there. Like you're about to be sick, which can't be from the alcohol, you've only had three so far and they weren't your usual double shots.
"If you'll excuse me I need to g-" you walk away, leaving your drink at the bar. As you're walking towards the bathroom, someone steps back from the bar, too quickly for you to dodge them.
You run right into them and sigh, "Excuse you."
"I'm sorry, sweetheart."
You look up and a blonde guy is standing there. Something about him causes your curiosity to spike, "No.. it's fine. I was just-" you shake your head, "I'm sorry, is this is weird, but do I know you?"
He shrugs, "My name's Sam."
"Sam. Sam. Sam." You repeat to yourself a few times quietly, "No, sorry. I don't think I know a Sam."
"Hmm. Well maybe we can call it fate that you just happened to run into me like you did." He smirks and for some reason, his words cause you to straight up your posture, "first off, you weren't paying attention."
You smirk and tilt your head, "Second off, I swear we've had a conversation before. I just-"
"Can't think of it right now? That happens to me all the freaking time." He chuckles as he sips his drink, "Are you drinking?"
"I mean, I was. I left mine back there with a guy, I was on my way to the bathroom."
"Oh, shit. I'm sorry, are you with someone?" Sam asks and you shake your head, wanting to say yes because it really feels like it, but in reality, you're not.
"No, no. My friend just left me there and he appeared and yeah. Nothing serious, I don't even know his name."
Why are you defending yourself to someone you don't know, you think, "I'm y/n. I guess I should have told you that when you told me yours."
He smiles, "Pretty name, y/n." He motions to the bar, "Can I buy you a new one?" You smile, "I think I'd like that a lot, Sam."
You step up to the bar with him and Sam flags down the one bartender, "Whatever she wants. It can go on my tab, Golbach."
As you look up at him, you get this odd feeling of déjà vu.
"What?" He asks with a smirk and you shake your head, "You just.. remind me of someone I can't really remember."
"What?" He laughs, "Sorry, I don't mean to laugh I just-"
"No, no please laugh. I'm so awkward." You cover your face with one hand and he shakes his head, "I'm sorry." He moves your hand from your face, "I think you're beautiful."
You feel your cheeks heat up and he bites his lower lip, "Can I ask you a question?"
You nod, "Yes."
He leans in, eyes focusing onto yours, "You will answer yes to my question and not question anything else. Can you follow me to the bathroom so I can have a taste of you?"
You smile, "Yes."
"That was easy." He downs the rest of his drink and slides his hand down into yours, "Follow me, princess."
You leave your drink, mind only focusing on one thing right now and you absolutely were not questioning it.
He leads you to the back, pushing the door to the bathroom open and lets you walk in first. He follows behind you, shutting the door and locking it.
He stares at you for a few seconds, the only thing he's focused on right now is listening to your blood flow through your veins.
"You're going to taste so fucking good." He moves in front of you within a second, hands on your hips which guide you back to sit you on the sink's edge.
His eyes focus on yours again, "Don't make a sound."
All you do is nod, moving your eyes from him to the wall behind him as he dips his head down to press his lips to the side of your neck.
Your eyes flutter closed as he gently sucks a spot into your neck, tongue moving over your skin before lifting his head ever so slightly.
His grip tightens on your waist as his fangs emerge, eager to be sunk into your delicate skin.
"Ready?" Sam whispers and you nod silently. He smirks and your eyes go wide, hands sliding up and gripping the collar of his shirt as his teeth sink into your skin.
His groan is muffled by your neck and his hands pull you in closer to him.
Your hand lays on the back of his head, mouth parted in completely silence as your eyes flutter closed.
The feelings you get is pain mixed with the upmost euphoric pleasure.
As you open your eyes, you see a man leaning up against the wall, watching. You can't tell who he is, as your vision is kind of hazy.
Sam lifts his head a little, "Go away Colby."
The guy, who you presume as Colby now, chuckles, "Come on, who says you can have all the fun?" Sam stands up, licking his now red lips. He lifts a finger, wiping away the blood drop that's rolling down his chin from the corner of his mouth.
"You can have your fun later. This was my idea, so I get first dibs, remember?" Sam glances back at him and he walks up next to him, eyes on you, "She is so fucking beautiful."
"Ain't she?" Sam grips your chin, "You can talk now, but you're still not questioning anything."
You clear your throat, swallowing to relieve it from the dryness and Colby sighs, "Clean her blood up, Sam."
"Why?" Sam teases, "Smells good doesn't it?"
Colby shakes his head, "You know I don't have control like you do." Sam sighs, rolling his eyes as he wipes the blood from your neck with his thumb, "Scaredy cat."
He smears some of his blood on the open wounds, getting them to heal faster so he can cover his tracks before he brings his thumb to his lips.
You watch as he licks the red liquid from his skin, "Mm." He leans back slightly before leaning back in, his voice going quieter, "So fucking good."
He presses his lips to yours and the metallic taste of your own blood washes over your tongue.
"Alright. You gotta get her back to her friends, they're ready to go to another bar." Colby moves back, leaning against the wall and Sam nods, "Do you have any questions for me, sweetheart?"
You smile slightly, reaching out to grab his shirt with your hands, "You're coming with me."
He raises a brow, "Is that a demand?"
"Only if you want it to be." You bite your lip, staring up at him as you continue to smile at him. He sighs, "I'll find you, babe. I promise."
You nod, sliding down from the sink, "You better." As you go to walk towards the door, Colby clears his throat, "Sam."
Sam sighs, "Shit, right." Sam quickly moves between you and the door, "I promise I'll undo all of this later, but for right now.." he cups your cheeks with his hands, looking into your eyes, "Forget about what happened and what you saw. You're going to tell your friends that you used the bathroom and only remember me as Sam Golbach. A regular guy from the bar down the street."
Within a blink of an eye, they're both gone and you're left standing alone in the bathroom, "Guess I'm done here."
You walk out and your friends are standing in a group by the door, "There she is. We thought you left." Cami says reaching out to grab your hand.
"No, I was just using the bathroom." You smile, "Are we going to another bar?"
Cami nods, "We're going to go hang out at Electric Avenue." You groan, "Oh my god, I love that place."
She laughs, "Then what are we waiting for?" She wraps her arm around yours and as you leave Bar Eight, you can't help but feel like you're forgetting something.
Something that happened, but you can't quite put your finger on it. That sick feeling returns, but this time it comes with heartache.
Even though you're with your friends, you feel extra lonely right now. In this moment you just want to go home, curl up in bed and cry because you're missing something so bad right now, but if anyone were to ask, you can't give them an answer that sounds sane enough for them to not laugh or think you're not crazy.
Because let's face it, the fact that you're obsessing over someone or something that you have zero knowledge about, is pretty insane.
"ID's please." The bouncer says as you walk up. You dig into your purse and pull out your wallet, slipping your id from its holder.
He checks it over, handing it back to you to move onto Cami. You wait for her by the door and when she walks through, you link your arm with hers, pretending that you're not ready to run home.
"Shots. Please!" She yells over the music and you sigh, "I'll do one, maybe two."
"We'll see." She giggles as she pulls you with her to the bar and rests her arms on the tall counter.
"Well hello ladies." The bartender walks up, "I'm Blake, anything you need I'll be happy to serve it to you."
Cami giggles, "Thank you, Blake. I think.. to start off, we'll do-" she pauses for a second, "Six teq-"
"No." You say quickly and she sighs, "Fine. Six vodka shots."
Blake smirks, "You got it." He winks at you before walking away and Cami leans in, "He is so hot." You shrug, "He's alright."
"Alright? Are we seeing the same guy? Y/n. He's into you!" She nudges your side with her elbow, "Get his number."
If he, as so little as it may seem, gets your number, I will snap his neck in front of everyone.
"No." You snap at Cami, "I'm not giving him my number. And you aren't either."
She scoffs, "Is this about the little crush you have on that character in your book because if so-"
"Cami." You roll your eyes, "no it's not about that okay." She turns towards you, leaning against the bar, "Then what's it about? Hmm."
You sigh and right as you're about to give her some bullshit answer, a guy comes up beside you and wraps his arm around your waist, "It's about me."
You look up and your mood instantly switches, "Sam! There you are."
"Here I am." He smiles as he looks down at you, "I told ya I'd meet you here."
Cami shakes her head, "Wait." She points to Sam, "Who is this and when did you meet him?"
"Cami, this is Sam Golbach. A regular guy from the bar down the street." The words seem scripted to you, but you didn't really pay attention to that.
You felt safe. Complete. Almost like this is the meaning to your obsessing and empty fantasies.
"Why didn't you tell me? I thought you were talking to that other guy?" Cami tilts her head and you scoff, "You make it sound like I'm a whore, Cami."
She laughs, "Oh god, no. No, I didn't mean it-"
"It's fine." You laugh, "He knows about the other guy I was talking to. It just.. didn't work out."
Blake comes back and delivers the six shots on the tray. His eyes move to Sam, staying on him as he speaks, "Six vodka shots."
He walks away and Sam can't help but laugh, "I don't think he likes me."
"Well maybe it's because he was eyeing up your girl before you showed up." Cami grabs a shot and looks around for the others.
She waves them down, motioning for them to come over and they do. Singing along and dancing mildly to the music that's bumping through the club.
"Heyyy. Who's this?" Your other friend asks pointing to Sam. He leans forward, "I'm Sam."
"Sam. Sam. Sam." She laughs, clearly reaching her alcohol limit, and fast, "You gonna stick around?"
Sam nods, "I mean, yeah. I planned on it. At least until one of us-" he nods towards you, "- is ready to leave."
Your friend laughs, "No, no. I meant sticking around as in dating my girl here." Sam's brows raise and he nods, "I mean, yeah. Yeah. I plan on it, I mean. That's if she wants me to."
Your arm tightens around his waist and he smiles, "I think that's a yes." You nod, resting your head on his shoulder. As you're standing there, waiting for the shots to be distributed, you spot another oddly familiar face.
"Who's that guy over there?" You ask pointing across the bar. Sam leans down, "Which one, sweetheart?" You lean over slightly, "The guy next to the girl in the pink top."
"Oh that's Colby." Sam turns his head to look into your eyes, "You recognize him from back at the bar, he's a good friend of mine." Sam looks at you and you nod, "Oh okay. Yeah that makes sense. Maybe I do remember him."
Sam smiles and kisses your temple. He closes his eyes as he takes a deep breath, remembering what your blood tasted like on his tongue.
His hand grips your hip tight, loosening as he takes a shot glass from Cami, "Thank you."
You take yours and wait for Cami to tap hers against the bar. Everyone follows, tapping each glass against the wood before knocking them back.
Everyone cheers, pulling each other onto the dance floor. Sam takes your hand into his, pull you with him before spinning you around to press his chest against your back.
His hands slide down, gripping your waist as you move to the beat of the song. Your head rests back onto his shoulder and he rests his cheek against yours.
Your arm slides up, wrapping around his neck and you spin around to face him, your other arm moving up to interlock your hands behind his head.
"You're so beautiful." Sam says which causes you to smile. He brushes hair from your neck, subtly inspecting the now healed bite mark. He lick his lips, tilting his head as his eyes meet yours again.
"Does your friend need a dancing partner? I can send Cami over to talk to him?" You tilt your head and Sam chuckles, "Nah, I think he'll be alright."
"Girlfriend?" You ask and Sam shakes his head, "No."
"Oh, is he gay? My friend Curtis ca-."
Sam laughs, "No, no. He's not. He just.." he brushes hair from your face, "He has his eye on someone very special already."
"Good for him." You smile, pulling Sam closer. Sam nods, "Yeah, it really will be good for him." He leans in, lips connecting with yours and its sparks.
Bright sparks, hell. Those are fireworks.
"I don't want to leave you." You admit, "Sorry if that w-"
"I don't want to leave you, either." Sam cuts you off, lips connecting right back with yours. You lay your hand on the back of his back, sliding the other one down his chest and pushing away from him, "They're all coming back to my place, so I hope that doesn't change anything."
Sam shakes his head, "doesn't change a thing, baby."
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
You giggle slightly to yourself as you dig for your keys, "I hope I grabbed them."
"I'm sure they're in there." Sam says giving you a smile. Cami pushes between the two of you, "Do you have them?"
Sam glances at her and back to you, "She's looking for them."
You look up at her, "Can you move your head, you're blocking the light." You try not to laugh but fail, causing her to laugh which spreads throughout everyone else.
Sam shakes his head and you pull out your keys, jingling them as you look back, "Found them."
They all cheer and you unlock the door, pushing it open before you drag Sam in with you.
You set your bag and keys on the counter before turning to face Sam, "Do you need a drink or anything?"
He licks his lips, brushing hair from your neck, "I do, but I'll get it then."
"I can get it fo-"
He cuts you off, "I'm fine, sweetheart." He smiles, "Come on, let's go sit." He takes your hand into yours and pulls you towards the couch.
You sit on his lap, looking back at Cami and your other friends who are raiding your fridge. She gives you a look and nods towards your room.
She walks over stopping at the door way, "Y/n, can you come help me unzip my dress."
You look back at her, "Oh yeah." You get up, sliding your hand along Sam's shoulders as you walk around the couch.
Cami pulls you into your room and shuts the door, her voice is quiet, "Don't you think.. Sam is.." she trails off and you tilt your head, "Sam is? What, Cami?"
She waves her hands in a circle, "I don't know, he seems a bit.. controlling."
You laugh slightly, "What do you mean?"
"The way he just pulled you over to the couch, I mean you were just trying to offer him a drink." She shrugs, "I don't know, it just.. you just met him, we just met him, and he's already back at your place?"
"I don't understand what you're saying? You do this all the time, cami." You cross your arms, "Do you want me to kick him out?"
"That's not what I'm saying at all, y/n. I'm just saying that I get a really weird vibe from him, he just.. he seems cold." She shrugs, sighing as she turns around, "Can you unzip me quick, though please?"
You roll your eyes, reaching up to quickly unzip the dress, "I know you're just trying to look out for me, but something about him just feels.. right."
She turns around, leaning down to grab her bag, "ultimately it's your choice at the end of the day, but I'm just saying be careful. I just didn't like the way he drug you over to the couch."
"I think you're being a little dramatic." You laugh, "Now change, and come out so we can watch a movie."
You walk over to your door, opening it to walk back over to the couch. Sam greets you with open arms as you sit back down on his lap, "Everything okay?"
You nod, "Yeah, her zipper was just stuck in some loose string from her dress."
You didn't have to lie, Sam already heard everything.
"Dress okay?" He asks and you nod. He plants a kiss to your cheek, "Good."
Cami walks back out, coming over to sit next to you, "So, what movie are we watching?"
"Something funny. Oh!" Cami snaps, "Why don't we watch Vampires Suck? Have you seen it?"
"Isn't that the movie that's based off of Twilight? Doesn't actually suck?" One of your friends say, and Cami nods with a smirk as she leans forward to grab the remote, "Yes, it is, and it's supposed to suck on purpose. That's the whole point."
Sam chuckles shaking his head, the thought of watching a bad vampire movie was so cliche to him.
Cami turns his head, leaning out to look at him, "Is that alright with you?"
He looks at Cami and nods, "Why wouldn't it be?"
"Cami." You sigh, "Just play the stupid movie." She sighs quietly and presses play, tossing the remote down next to her.
A little bit into the movie, you lean in to Sam, "I'll be right back, I have to go to the bathroom." He nods, giving you a smile as you get up.
You walk to the bathroom closing the door and as you look at yourself in the mirror, your mind shifts from Sam and you zone out.
"You're just.." Colby smiles, brushing hair from your face, "So pretty."
You smile, a blush rising onto your cheeks, "Thank you, Colby." He leans in, "I've honestly never come across anyone as pretty as you."
"Okay, now you're just saying stuff." You laugh and he shakes his head, "No, I'm not. I'm being serious. I've seen hundreds of faces, and yours is my favorite one of all."
You look away, laughing slyly, "Colby."
He grips your chin, turning your head back to face him, "I'm being so serious right now. I'd risk fighting Lucifer himself to be with you."
"Lucifer?" You question and Sam's voice pops up, "Colby. That's enough. Knock it off."
You look around, unable to spot Sam..
Your eyes focus on your figure in the mirror, blinking a few times before you continue to do what you went in there for.
You open the door, flicking the lights off as you walk out.
"Hey I think I'm going to head out." You look up at your friend as you sit down next to Sam and Cami, "Are you good to drive?"
They nod, "Oh yeah, I feel fine. I'll text you when I get home."
"Okay. Be careful." You smile and they nod as they walk out.
A little bit later, two more friends leave, then another one, leaving you with just Sam and Cami.
"Is it just me, or were they acting kind of weird?" You look between them and Sam shrugs, "I know they were getting tired, probably didn't want to have to sleep on the floor." He teases them reassures you, "I think they were good."
Cami yawns and stretches as she leans forward, "Yeah, I think I'm going to head home. I forgot I had an appointment early in the morning."
"But it's Saturday?" You question and she shrugs, "Yeah. There's one that has certain hours."
"Oh." You nod, "Okay." Your eyes follow her as she gets up, walking over to grab her back, "I'll talk to you tomorrow. Love you!"
"Yeah, okay. Love you, too." You watch her shut the door and then you slowly look over at Sam, "That was so weird."
"Maybe they just settled down, got tired from the alcohol?" Sam suggests and you shrug, "I mean, yeah. You're right." You laugh, "Sorry I'm just-"
There's another thump, almost like the same one at earlier on in the day.
"That happened earlier." You look back, "Hello?"
"Maybe it's your neighbors?" Sam stands up, "I'll go check, maybe someone else did leave."
You nod, turning around to watch as he walks back to check the rooms. He comes out of your room and shakes his head, "No one's here."
You nod, continuing to watch as he then gets this annoyed look on his face and he sighs, "Fine."
"Sam?" You slowly get up, "Who are you talking to?"
"No one, I just-" he laughs, "I have something to tell you."
Your heart starts racing and you feel like your chest gets heavy, "Oh god." Your mind starts racing through every single idea that could potentially happen.
He had a plan this whole time. Gain your trust, get your alone, murder you.
He chuckles, "Relax, sweetheart. I'm not going to murder you."
Your head snaps towards him and you point, "H-how did you-"
"I can read your mind."
His words catch you off guard, "Y0u ju- you can r-" he pause, closing your eyes as you rest your forehead in your hand, "What the fuck is hap-"
You look up, gasping when Sam is right in front of you, "Shit." You go to step back but Sam grabs your wrist.
As scared as you want to be, when he touches you, it's like all your fear washes away and you want to do anything in your power to keep him with you.
"Listen to me." Sam's voice is soft, "I have to tell you something, but I need you to not freak out." He looks into your eyes, "Okay?"
You nod your head, "Y-yeah. I guess I can try."
"Come." He motions towards the couch, "Have a seat."
You walk over, sitting down. You turn your body towards him and rest your hands in your lap. Sam leans back, casually extending his arm over the back, "I made your friends go home."
"Huh?" You tilt your head, "What do you mean you made them leave?"
He shrugs, "Because we were getting impatient and they were just being massive cockblocks."
You sit in silence as you try to process his words, "We?"
Sam nods, "Yeah, remember Colby from the bar?" You nod slowly, "um, yeah. Yes." Sam nods, "Well he's here, too."
You whip around, looking for him, but you don't see him, "Where?" You turn back around, heart racing faster, "Why is he here, too?"
Sam stares at your chest, biting his lip as he pushes the thirst for your blood out of his mind, "You can't see him, he's hiding himself."
"Hiding himself?" You run your hand through your hair, breathing out a quiet, "Fuck."
After a moment of silence, Sam speaks up, "Do you want to know what happened at the bar?"
"I know what happened at the bar. I met you, we talked had a drink, I went to the bathroom then came out and walked with my friends down the street to another club." You look at him and he smirks, "No, sweetheart. Do you want to know what really happened?"
"What really happened?" You question and Sam leans forward, looking into your eyes, "When you remember, you won't make a big deal about it."
You nod and Sam tilts his head, eyes still on yours, "Remember."
You freeze as your mind plays what actually happened at Bar Eight.
Sam compelling you to say yes to his question. Following Sam to the bathroom. Sitting on the edge of the sink and being told not to make a sound.
His teeth sinking into your neck and you can almost feel the pleasured pain he caused you as he sucked your blood from your neck.
Colby emerging from behind Sam as your vision goes hazy.
Everything flows if, filling the cracks with missing information and you're left speechless.
You blink, your eyes moving to look at Sam. The only words you can form leave you more shocked as they leave your lips, "Y-you're.. a vampire?"
Sam smiles, nodding his head as he leans forward to rest his elbows on his knees, "Correct."
"And Colby?" You raise your brows and Sam tilts his head, "He's a demon."
"A de-" you shake your head, "No. I'm dreaming I can't- this can't be real." You stand up, placing one hand on your forehead and the other on your hip, "I'm having a really, really weird dream."
"Hate to break it to ya, babe." Colby's voice startles you as he walks around from behind you. You jump, stepping back as you look at him. He holds his hand out, "I'm sorry. Didn't mean to scare ya."
He chuckles, "But you're not dreaming. You're awake, and we're here."
You slide your hand down, resting your fingers over your lips and your mind starts racking up questions.
"Yes, we're why you felt guilty after going to Tara's party." Colby nods, "And why you felt so obsessed over, well.. nothing really."
"It wasn't really nothing, y/n. We made it so you were, what? Colby. I don't even know what you'd call it." Sam looks to Colby and Colby purses his lips, "Mm."
He snaps his fingers and looks to you, "Love sick."
"We made you love us, without even knowing us. That's why you felt so comfortable with me at the bar, we'd basically manipulate your dreams so you'd know who we were, but someone.." Sam trails off, glaring at Colby before looking back to you, "Thought it would be best if we made it so you couldn't remember when you woke up."
You can feel your legs shaking below you, "And the making me do things? What.. what's that?"
"Oh the compulsion?" Sam nods, "Yeah, that's my favorite thing about being a vampire." He laughs, "I can make anyone do anything I wanted."
"So you.. compelled me.. to.." you point to your neck and he nods, "Yes."
"Why?" You stare at him and he shrugs, "Come on, if a stranger came up to you and said follow me to the bathroom, I want to bite your neck and drink your blood, would you have honestly, willingly gone with?"
"I mean, no but- wait." You point to Colby, "You don't like my blood?"
He sighs, "Ah, yeah. That."
"He could rip you apart if he really wanted to." Sam laughs and Colby rolls his eyes, "So could you, Sam."
Sam nod, leaning back to bring one of his legs up to least on his other one, "That's true. I could tear you apart if I wanted."
Sam is in front of you within the blink of an eye and you lean back slightly. His arm snakes around your wait, hand planting on the small of your back, "But I think you are just.. the sweetest thing."
There is absolutely no fear in your body, and they both know it.
"Why me?" You ask, your breathing growing faster as Sam slides his other hand up your arm to push your hair out of the way, "Why not you?"
His fingers run over the spot he had previously drank from before, "You have such a pretty face, on a pretty neck. You drive me crazy."
He leans in, lips gently pressing against your skin before tilting his head up, "Tell me you don't want me right now. Tell me you don't want us.. right now."
"I-I." You gasp as you feel Colby appear behind you, his hands sliding onto your waist. You bite down on your lip, "Are you going to hurt me?"
"Not unless you want us to, baby." Colby chuckles, "We're here to pleasure you. Make you feel things you've never even thought of feeling."
Colby presses his chest against your back and Sam tilts his head, "We don't take orders from anyone.." his thumb brushes over your bottom lip, "But you."
A rush of excitement washes over you and they both chuckle, "she's excited." Colby whispers, "I can feel it."
"This is so fucking weird." You laugh, still slightly in shock, "Oh my god."
"What do you say, sweetheart." Sam looks into your eyes, "Will you let us be your sickening desire?"
Your lips part open as Colby's lips attach to your neck, sucking a mark into your neck.
You had to admit, the devils voice is so sweet to hear.
Along with them being pretty cute for being, what others would consider monsters.
"You think we're cute?" Sam teases and you sigh, "My thoughts aren't safe anymore are they?"
Sam shakes his head, "Not at all, babe."
"You share them with us now." Colby whispers, "So are you going to answer Sam's question. Are you going to let us show you what an exhilarating ride it is to dance with the devil?"
After taking a moment to think, your eyes meet Sam's and you nod, "Take me."
"As you wish." He lifts you up, walking over to the couch, "But before we start. Can I have that drink now?"
"So that's what you meant?" You bite your lip and he nods, "Uh huh. Exactly." He looks over at Colby and when you look over at him, he's gone.
Sam turns your chin back towards him, "He's not too far off." He winks and slides his hand to the back of your neck, pulling you in closer to him as he leans up, mouth close to your neck.
Your hands grip the collar of his shirt, preparing for the initial piercing of your skin.
"Tell me when. You call the shots." Sam whispers and you nod, "Go."
You let out a whine, tilting your head to the side as his fangs sink into your neck.
Your fists tighten with his collar still balled up in them, and a moan slips through. Sam wraps tightens his arm around your waist, groaning against your neck.
The euphoric feelings rushes in, causing your arousal to spike.
You need him, and you needed him bad.
Your mind dances off onto the topic of Colby, thinking about how good he looks in the black leather jacket.
How his dark demeanor intimidates you, but also turns you on more than anything.
"Fucking hell, babe. You taste fucking good." Sam leans back, fangs still out as his licks the blood from his lips.
Your eyes gaze over his face as you slide a hand up, wiping away a bead of blood that's getting ready to drip. You drag your finger up his chin, slowly placing it in his mouth and you gasp when his lips wrap around it, sucking your flood off your finger.
"I know I should be scared but.." you bite your lip, pulling your finger from his lips, "I'm not."
"We don't want you to be scared." Sam whispers, "We love you."
Without any hesitation, "I love you both."
"That's the way we want it." He smirks, looking over your shoulder, "You good, Colbs?"
"Oh yeah." Colby answers from behind, "Clean her up. I want my turn with her." Sam smirks and licks his lips again before leaning forward.
A shiver goes down your spine from Colby's words and Sam's tongue gliding over the fresh puncture wounds.
A little whimper leaves your lips, "Please."
"Soon baby." Both say in unison.
"Stand up for me, princess." Sam says and you stand up, slightly wobbly. Colby moves behind you, sweeping you off your feet, "You'll get used to that the more it happens."
You stare up at him, captivated by how a demon can look so pretty.
"I'm not in my true form, sweetheart." Colby smirks, walking you into your room, "Maybe one day I'll show you."
"What do you look like?" You ask and Colby lays you on the bed, "Let's not talk about that right now." He licks his lips, pressing them to yours.
Your hands move to his neck, moaning quietly against them. He slides a hand down, slipping it under your shirt, earning a moan as he toys with your nipple.
You tilt your head back, arching your back as he pinches a bit harder.
You wonder where Sam is, and he instantly appears next to you, "I'm right here, princess." He smirks down at you and you bite down on your lip.
You had so many emotions flooding through your mind and body.
You have never, never felt like this before and that was part of their goal.
Colby slips his hand out, gripping your shirt at the top and tearing it with a smooth glide, exposing your chest, "Mm. Naughty girl, not wearing a bra."
You bite your lip, looking down at him and he smirks, "I like it better when you don't." He winks and leans down, attaching his lips to one nipples while his fingers find the other.
A moan leaves your lips as you lay a hand on the back of his head, "Fuck."
Sam leans down slightly, laying a hand on your head and brushing it over your hair, "We've been watching you for a while now. Did you know that?"
"N-no." You whimper and Sam chuckles, "Of course not. We didn't want to make you love sick, we just needed a way to make you ours before we told you who we truly are."
Colby leans up, "You're the only sense of humanity we have."
"Really?" You look from him to Sam and Sam nods, "Really." You look back to Colby as you feel your jeans being unbuttoned. You lift your hips, eager for them to be off quicker.
Sam stands up, unbuttoning his shirt as Colby works on undressing you fully, "Shit, this is so fucking hot."
Colby smirks, chuckling as he slides his hands up your bare legs, stopping at the band of your panties, "You're more than ready for us, aren't you?"
You nod quickly, "Yes." You move your hips up and down, "yes."
"Taste her, Colby." Sam commands and with that, your panties are ripped from your body, tossed like nothing to the floor.
"Fuck." Colby groans, quickly getting into position with his head between your thighs. Your lips part as you watch his inch closer to you, biting down on your lip when he glances up at you.
He closes the space, his tongue gliding up and down your folds, groaning against you as he finally tastes what he's been anticipating.
Sam's eyes are heavily focused on Colby, watching as he eats you out, "Fuck." He whispers, hand sliding down to palm himself.
You slide your arm towards him while placing your other hand on Colby's head, moaning as your back arches, "S-Sam."
Sam's eyes move to you, instantly picking up on what you want to do for him. He discards his pants, his boxers quickly following, leaving him naked as he climbs on the bed.
He sits on his knee, resting back on his calves as he reaches down. His fingers wrap around your wrist, guiding it to wrap around his cock.
He lets out a relieving moan, bucking his hips as you squeeze and gently stroke him up and down, "F-fuck."
His chest rises and falls quickly as his eyes watch you touch him.
You look over, locking eyes with him as you moan. He focuses on yours, "Cum."
Your body tenses up as a wave of absolute pressure washes over your body, screaming out as you tug on Colby's hair, which earns a deep groan from him.
"That's it, princess." Sam moans, "Fuck."
You catch your breath, watching as Colby sits up. He moves up, attaching his lips to yours and you moan at the taste of yourself on his tongue that moves against yours.
Sam grabs your wrist, pulling it away from him as he moves to the end of the bed. Once Colby climbs off, Sam grabs your ankles, easily pulling you down so your legs hang down.
You watch as Sam drops to his knees, hooking his arms under your knees as he moves in. His tongue slips into you, groaning as you gasp, "Sh-it."
Colby gets onto the bed, biting his lip as he watches you take his cock into your hand without being told, "Such a good girl." He reaches down, running his thumb over your bottom lip.
You part them, taking his thumb into your mouth and sucking. He tilts his head, watching the sight below him.
He looks down at Sam, watching him devour you before looking back, "Use your mouth, baby."
You comply, you don't need any kind of compulsion to do anything.
It's all you.
You push his thumb out of your mouth with your tongue, lifting your head to allow the tip of his cock to replace it.
He gasps, moaning as he lays a hand on the back of your head, "More, baby. Take more of me."
You swirl your tongue, coating him in saliva before you push your head onto him more. You moan around him as Sam slips a finger into your soaked cunt, tongue swirling around your clit.
Colby fights to keep his eyes open, "Shit." He pushes your head down, holding it there as he thrusts his hips, "Doing so fucking good."
Your back arches and your moans are muffled. Colby holds still, allowing you to have control again.
You bob your head, pausing as Sam slips another finger in, curling them slowly as he sucks your clit.
"Fuck." Colby glances down at Sam and back to you, brushing hair from your face. You tilt your head back, taking a deep breath as you moan loudly.
Colby moves back a little, leaning down to whisper in your ear, "Cum."
You whimper as your orgasm rushes in again, ripping loud moans and screams from your throat as you cum around Sam's fingers.
"Does that feel good?" Colby asks stroking his hand over your hair, "Looks like it does."
"Yesyesyes!" You scream out, "Fuck yes!"
Sam pulls his fingers out, standing up to lean down over you. Your eyes lock into his as he slips his two fingers into your mouth, "lick them clean for me."
Your tongue swirls around his fingers, sucking them clean like he said. He drags them out, pulling your bottom lip down slightly as he leans down to kiss where he bit a not, too long ago.
He reaches up, gripping your chin as he studies your face, "I want to drink from you while Colby fucks you from behind."
You nod, "P-please, Sam."
"You don't have to beg, princess. Not this time." He smirks and stands up, walking around to lay on the bed, "Come here."
You sit up, turning around to crawl up the bed, straddling his lap. Colby moves behind you, hands on your hips as you lean down to connect your lips with Sam's.
You feel spit run down over your center, followed by Colby's cock rubbing it in before slipping the tip of his cock in.
You gasp into Sam's mouth and both of their hands hold your body still, "Feel good?" Sam asks lowly and you nod, eyes closed as you moan, "So good."
Sam kisses down the front of your neck, licking back up to under your jaw, "Think you can take both of us at once?"
His words surprise you and he chuckles, "Only if you want to try of course."
Colby pushes his cock into you, groaning as his fingers dig into your hips, "Shit." He bites down on his lip, slowly pulling out before starting to thrust at a slow pace.
You moan, looking down at Sam. He watches your face scrunch up as he slides his hand up to your neck, slowly squeezing.
"fuck, I can't fight it anymore." Sam groans as he pulls your hair back into a make shift ponytail, holding it with his hand, "Stay as still as you can for me, okay?"
You whimper in response, moaning from Colby's cock thrusting in and out of you.
Sam licks his lips, tilting his head to get to the side he hasn't bit yet. He pulls you in close and sinks his fangs into your neck.
You let out a small yelp, quickly covering it up with a loud moan. You fist the sheets next to Sam, pulling in them as you try to stay as still as you can.
Colby's grip on your hips is tight enough to where you know you'll have small round bruises from his fingers digging into your skin.
Sam sucks your neck, moaning lowly as lifts his head slightly. His eyes flick down to your neck, "I'll never get enough of you."
"I'm yours." You moan out quietly, "Both of yours."
"Who do you belong to?" Colby asks, "Say it louder."
Sam reconnects his mouth to your neck, making your vision go blurry, "Y-yours." You moan, screaming out, "Both, I belong to you both."
"That's our girl." Colby groans, "Our fucking girl."
Sam lifts his head, licking your neck clean and lays his head back. You stare down at him as Colby's thrusts come to a stop.
Sam reaches down, grabbing his cock to slide it into your cunt along with Colby's.
You let out a whimper as you feel yourself stretching to accommodate them both, "F-fuck." You hang your head down, whimpering as they both start to thrust, quickly finding a pace.
Sam slides his hand back up, cupping your cheek, "Tell us how good you feel."
"So.. fucking.." you gasp, "Good!"
"Do you want to cum?" Colby asks and you answer him immediately, "Yes, yes. So bad." A string of whines and moans leave your lips non-stop.
"Little bit longer baby." Colby rubs his hand up and down your back, "Doing so good for us."
Your eyes scan quickly over Sam's face. There's just something about the blood covering his chin that turns you on even more.
"Thank you." He groans out with a smirk. You smile, biting your lip as your brows furrow, "Oh fuck. Fuck."
"Think she's had enough, Colbs?" Sam asked eyes not leaving your face.
"She's earned a break." Colby answers and Sam pinches your chin between his pointer and thumb, "Look at me, princess."
You open your eyes and he locks his onto yours, "Cum."
Pleasure washes over you, causing your body to shake as it feels much more powerful than the last two orgasms you had.
You feel their cocks slip out of you and you cling to Sam, moaning and whining as you work your way through your high.
"That's it, baby. That's it." Sam whispers as he plants kisses on your face, leaving little spots of blood.
You slowly relax, breathing heavy as you roll off of Sam to lay on the bed.
"You know. You look so cute with blood on your face." Sam leans over and smiles down at you. You laugh slightly, too tired to even care.
You feel someone one wiping you off and Sam comes back with a clean face and something to wipe yours off with.
You didn't think they would do this, you thought they were just going to have their way with you and leave.
"Just because we're labeled as not good doesn't mean we don't care about the aftercare part." Colby smirks slightly and you smile, "Sorry."
"Don't be sorry, sweetheart. You have a lot to learn." He winks and pulls the blankets up over your legs, "And yeah, that means we aren't going anywhere."
"Mhm. We claimed you." Sam says lying next to you, he brushes hair from your face, "so does it all make sense now?"
You nod, looking between them, "oh yeah. Everything is so much clearer now."
"You're still in shock aren't you?" Colby asks and you bat the air, "not at all." He raises a brow and tilts his head, "We can tell how you're feeling, babe. No need to lie."
You sigh, "Okay, fine. Maybe a little bit."
Colby lays next to you on your other side and rubs your arm, "Do you have any questions for us?"
"Were those thuds I heard earlier, you guys?" You ask as you pull the blanket up a little more. Sam laugh, "Yeah, that was Colby accidentally knocking stuff over."
You laugh, "This is just.." you sigh, "I'm sure I have more questions, I just.. my brain right now is so scrambled."
"You're fine, princess." Sam smiles, "You need rest."
"Will you be here in the morning?" You ask and look between them. Sam nods and Colby smiles, "We're always with you."
Sam smirks, "You have claim on us now."
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did and let me tell you, it was A LOT. So let me know how I did!
Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!
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