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buckleydiazmp4 · 26 days

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not to get all "actually☝️" about it but. the whole point of this is the fact that it isn't at all eddie's fault and buck just doesn't know how to properly process or recognize his feelings and know what he's missing *until* he gets presented with a specific situation. in truth buck has no right to be mad at eddie for building bonds with other ppl and it's why he has to do some introspection. this is not a "oh no poor buck eddie apologize to him!!!" thing, it's about buck getting, for lack of a better term, a good emotional humbling. eddie deserves good friendships and relationships, full stop. and if he likes the way he feels when he hangs out with tommy then great!! he's his own person and not a tool to further buck's character. but you also can't expect buck to immediately recognize that because, again, and for the millionth time, the whole POINT is that he doesn't. so if it has to get ugly and uncomfortable and embarrassing for him to do so then that is what will happen and that doesn't make either of them bad people. this is not a blame to be passing around. it's just them being human beings

#and now for a more controversial opinion im the tags:#ppl who are saying that everything that happens to eddie is always made about buck in the end. ummm. i really don't see it??#eddie has had his own moments of introspection and emotional journeys #(single parenthood. death of his wife. ptsd. therapy. just off from what i remember)#and buck has as well #(sex addiction. issues with his sister and his parents)#and if you don't think buck deserves an ACTUAL emotional introspection instead of the surface stuff that has gotten nowhere before #(couch. multiple girlfriends that he breaks up with after a couple episodes. etc)#then idk what to tell you. you just might not like buck at all #and i say this as a total eddie girl. because i have been since i watched s2 and onward #what is your mania with comparing them? jesus christ some of you just dont know how to appreciate characters without arguing against others #and i'm kinda getting mad now #disk horse #911 #911 spoilers #911 abc #eddie diaz #evan buckley #tommy kinard #buddie

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softquietsteadylove · 7 months

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I’d love to see some angst for the circus AU! Kro can’t be too happy that Thena keeps gravitating toward the lowly veterinarian 👀

Thena dismounted Angus, landing on one foot then the other. She hit her final pose, arms in the air, counting to three.

"Good!"

As soon as Kro's cane tapped the ground, Thena all but crumbled. At first she just hunched her shoulders, then she slowly sank to her knees, her chest heaving for breath in her tight, sparkling costume.

"Thena!"

He leaned over her, his hands hovering near but never on her. He bent, tilted his head, trying to see her and asses the damage. His worry was always evident, not that being a veterinarian qualified him to look after the health of the human performers.

Not that they had a proper physician in the company anyway.

"Thena, are you okay?" Gilgamesh asked gently, still hovering close but never making contact with her pale skin.

She nodded, although her gasping for breath was plain to see to everyone around the ring. She put her hand up to tell him she didn't need his assistance. Again, her hand drifted in the direction of his, but the two never met. "I-I'm okay, Gil."

Kro eyed them as he made his way down from the stands. "Run it again."

The vet looked up, glaring at him with a surprisingly intimidating expression, for someone always smiling. "Are you crazy? She can't do it again--look at her."

Thena only continued to get paler and paler.

"Are you telling me what my wife can and can't do?" Kro had no problem demanding, getting in Gil's face and using every inch of height he had on him.

"I'm saying that Thena is exhausted," Gilgamesh insisted, meeting his glare head on, like two dogs nearly locking heads as they bared their teeth.

"I'm fine," she huffed and puffed. She finally did pull her head up, indeed white as a sheet, "just...give me ten minutes."

"It's almost time for lunch anyway, boss," another stage hand suggested gently.

Thena remained on the ground as a few more came to her defense as subtly as possible. She looked up at her husband, "please?"

He all but snarled, picking up his cane in his hand.

Gilgamesh flinched, hunching closer to Thena, in front of her. He had thought Kro would pick up his cane and strike her in her defenseless position.

Kro looked at them both with as much disdain as he could afford to show so publically. "Half an hour--then I want tot see a run of the full show, front to back!"

The cast and crew held in their groans, all of them well beyond tired from their ruthless schedules. But Kro turned his back to exit the tent, leaving his staff - including his wife - to their work.

"Are you okay?" Gil whispered to Thena, kneeling down closer to her again. "You don't look so good."

Thena leaned into the press of the back of his hand to her cheek. Her eyes closed in pure bliss. "I just need to get off my feet, have some water."

Gil offered her his hand, letting her lean all of her weight on him as she stood. He wrapped his arm behind her and around her shoulder, holding it as gently as he would a bird in his palm. "Come on."

He helped her hobble over to the stands, even the old and unvarnished wood being better than being on her feet. Once they were both sitting, she continued to lean on him, seeming to fit right into his side like they were made for each other.

No one even batted an eye.

Thena reached for his cup of water eagerly, ready to gulp it down.

"Hey, easy," he spoke gently, like he did with his wounded animals. His hand tipped the cup up to her lips, letting her sip just a little at a time. "Don't make yourself sick."

He held the cup for her, letting her sip gently. Their hands met on the painted outside of the old tin, fingers brushing. She didn't even blink as he raised his palm to her forehead.

"I really think you should rest, Thena," he said just above a whisper. "You're probably coming down with something, you're so tired."

She didn't argue, just looked down at the water mug of his she held onto. "Kro won't have it. I haven't missed a single show since...well, since we were young."

The vet''s face hardened, "he's pushing you too hard."

Thena shrugged, "in sickness and in health."

The vet only looked angrier and angrier.

"Here y'go, Miss," one of the crew brought her a bowl of what they had cooked up for the cast meal that day.

She smiled at the extra piece of bread sitting along the side of it, "thank you."

Gilgamesh made no attempt to go get a serving for himself, sitting with her as she picked up a spoon and started poking at the meat stew. She took a small bite. "Not hungry?"

She shrugged again, poking around for smaller pieces of meat, or the beans they had used to fill out the body of the soup.

"Wait here," he put his hand on her knee before standing.

Thena watched him go, taking another sip of his water.

Kro kept quiet, despite the urge to demand what the hell all of that was. He knew that the vet had an obvious fondness for his wife. Plenty of men did--it was one of the many things that made him the man he was.

But this was more than a naive infatuation. More than a schoolboy crush on someone unattainable. Not only was his softness beyond want and desire, but it was not unrequited, which was the worst part.

Kro had never seen such an expression on Thena's face as when she was with that Gilgamesh.

Thena would light from within. Her eyes would become more green, her smile would lift, everything about her seemed to brighten. He knew what signs to look for. No matter what his relationship with her was, he undeniably knew his wife's behaviour. He wasn't a fool; he could see that whatever feelings the veterinarian had for her, she harboured them as well.

"Hey."

Kro remained as still as possible in his little spot in the tent's seam, where he could keep an eye on them.

Thena smiled as Gil came back with another bowl, he picked up hers and exchanged it with the one he brought back, making sure that she kept all three pieces of bread. "Gil-"

"You don't like meat."

That was ridiculous. When Kro had first found her, she was living on some remote, godforsaken little farm with her daft old father. She was used to living on animal meat.

And yet Thena looked...elated--and touched.

Gilgamesh started eating the bowl that had been brought to her. "But you need protein. I dug through it and got as much of the beans as I could. They'll keep you full. And eat the bread! You need the energy."

Kro scowled. He had no idea when eating meat had started bothering her. But he could bet it was because they had started using animals in the show. Blasted beasts were making her soft.

"Thank you."

Gilgamesh also laid his jacket over her bare, trembling legs as they ate. He scarfed down her bowl, with arguably less in it. He had given her his piece of bread, too.

Thena still ate slowly (it always infuriated Kro how long she took to eat a simple meal). But she ate more constantly, not breaking as she chewed the beans gently between each bite.

"I know you don't wanna say anything to him," Gilgamesh began. He was about to say something about Kro again. "But you're gonna get sick, Thena. Tell him you've sprained something, or I'll say that something's wrong with the equipment! But-"

"Gil," she said gently, her voice lulling him back into a sense of calm. She put her hand on his, "it won't do any good. I could fall off the tightrope and onto the ground before he would cancel a show willingly."

"I won't let that happen."

"I know," she smiled at him again. She had never smiled at Kro like that once in all their lives together. "Just don't let him catch you talking like this."

Don't let him see the way she loved him, she meant.

Gilgamesh put his hand over hers. "I'm starting to care less and less about what he catches me doing."

Those sounded like fighting words.

"Truly, Gil," she asserted, slipping her hand away and moving over on the bench, as if she had sensed Kro watching them. "Let me handle him."

"Handle what?"

Gilgamesh nearly jumped up from the bench in reflex, but Thena didn't move. As far as she was concerned, she had nothing to hide. She picked up her spoon again, "myself. I'll do the run through, but that's all I've got left for today."

Kro walked around the stands and over to her, shoving his cane against the chest of the defensive young veterinarian. He leaned closer to his wife's face. "You're done when I say we're done."

She glared right back at him, "I don't have anything left. Unless you want me to collapse during the show tomorrow."

She wouldn't be threatening it if it hadn't happened before. It was just once, and Angus - of all the beasts - had run to break her fall. But the crowd had been so scared that they had had to end the show early, even offer refunds.

Ever since then, if Thena said she was truly and deeply done, then she was done.

Kro leaned up and out of her face, although he looked at her no differently from how he looked at Angus or any of the other beasts. "Fine, one full dress rehearsal, then we break for the day. You better be ready for tomorrow."

"I always am."

Kro grabbed for his cane, only to find his hand holding onto it. That felt like a fighting gesture. "Problem?"

Gilgamesh let go of it, glaring at him without any trace of his usual nervous energy. "No, sir."

"Good," Kro snarled at him before turning to leave again. He really would leave this time. He could take his meal in their sleeper car (Thena never liked eating with him these days anyway).

By all means, the veterinarian could pine and yearn for his wife all he liked. She was still his, as far as Kro - and the sanctity of marriage - was concerned.

Whether she wanted him or not.

#Thenamesh Circus AU #whooooooo boy #the angst #it's pining hours #and not in the fun way #fun in a different way maybe #I wanted to touch on how things look from the other side #Kro thinks he knows his wife sooooooo well #and in many ways he does #but also doesn't #she does come from a farm #but ever since they started using animals in the shows she just thinks about how cruel a life they have #she relates to poor horses penned up all the time #and the maccaws they keep in cages #Kro tells her she's too skinny and needs to eat more #but because he gets mad at how slowly she eats he never waits to make sure she eats more #meanwhile Gil sits with her and talks with her #makes sure she has enough #one night he makes the meal for everyone #and Thena scarfs it down #even has a second helping #no one has ever seen her eat so fast #Gil is #😍

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