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sainns · 20 hours

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SWIM ㅤ✶ ㅤ PSH

syn by adoy he had it all planned out but how's he supposed to wait when it comes to you? ㅤ✉️

content femreader, established relationship, sunghoon pov and it's just a lot of him thinking about you, awkward ending cos idk how to end stuff genre fluff, oneshot wc 1147

sunghoon often gets overwhelmed by his feelings for you. sometimes the love he feels gets to be so intense that he doesn't know what to do, losing the ability to think rationally about anything that has to do with you.

he knew right away that he wanted to be the one to marry you but he held back for the four years and eight months that you dated, waiting until you talked about marriage first. you'd brought it up to him one morning, a simple conversation. one he replayed for weeks.

during those weeks he planned everything; his proposal. he bought a ring, bought tickets to paris (jake's idea—city of love and all that), booked a really nice hotel, and he had a whole itinerary for the day he planned on proposing. he's pretty sure he's going to be in debt for the rest of his life because of these expenses but it's worth it.

when he brought up the trip to you he simply played it off as something for your five year anniversary, it was close enough to the date so you didn't think much of it. five years was a long time so why wouldn't you do something special?

so on thursday morning, you rush to the airport because someone (sunghoon) didn't want to leave your embrace yet. thankfully, you made it on time, sunghoon holding tightly onto your hand to make sure he doesn't lose you in the crowd.

it takes fourteen hours to get from seoul to paris and another hour to drive to the hotel. the flight was.. okay. as good as a flight can be but god was it tiring, you don't think you and sunghoon have ever been as happy as you were to see a bed until tonight.

the next day you take it easy, spending most of it inside your hotel room, briefly stepping out to get dinner at some restaurant nearby. you're walking back, hands swinging back and forth slightly.

"what're we doing tomorrow?"

sunghoon hums, "it's a surprise,"

you knock your shoulder against his, "can i have a hint?"

"nope,"

you groan, throwing your head back while sunghoon smiles fondly at you. he loves you, he knows that. today, though, it feels like it's bigger than love. a lot bigger. you haven't even done anything significant today; it was practically just a regular day. if you ignore the fact that you were at a hotel in paris, but he ignores that part.

honestly, he isn't sure if there's a word deep enough to describe how he feels for you. it feels like he's drowning, sinking deeper and deeper every second that he spends with you and he's okay with that. more than okay; he's happy.

he wants to make you happy, too. he wants to spend the rest of his life seeing your smile and your laugh. he feels a slight wave of anxiety wash over him—what if he messes everything up? what if his proposal turns out to be awful?

he sighs, shaking those thoughts out of his head, instead focusing on you whine about how you need him to tell you what the surprise is. he just laughs at you, pulling out the key to the hotel room.

"i'll tell you tomorrow when we wake up, okay?"

"or now," you smile up at him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. his hands instinctively go to your waist.

"i can't, baby,"

"i'm gonna stay up all night thinking about this,"

he leans down, placing a kiss on the crown of your head, "yeah, i'm sure you will,"

you don't stay up all night. in fact, you fall asleep almost right away, probably still exhausted from yesterday's flight. sunghoon wishes he could fall asleep as easily as you, but he can't. not when he's proposing to you tomorrow. the presence of the ring hidden inside his suitcase is too suffocating, it's like he can feel it in his hands already.

he pulls you closer to his chest, pressing his cheek against the top of your head. he really hopes that tomorrow will be your last day as simply boyfriend and girlfriend.

he falls asleep after you but he wakes up before you. he's glad that he did because it gives him the opportunity to stare at you. he likes when he wakes up before you; it gives him the chance to see you at your most peaceful, when all the stress from your life is missing.

he shifts, cupping your cheek with his hand, rubbing small circles against your skin. he stares at you for a few seconds longer before leaning forward to place a kiss on your forehead.

"g'morning,"

he smiles against your skin, "morning, baby. did i wake you up? i'm sorry,"

you groan, pulling away from him so that you can rub your eyes, "no, i was already awake,"

he hums and you sit up, stretching your arms out.

"i didn't forget about the surprise, by the way," you glance towards him, "tell me, pretty please,"

he's quiet when he speaks, licking his lips, "i love you,"

"i know you do. i love you too. is that your surprise?" you lay back down, the two of you facing each other.

"will you marry me?"

he doesn't think before asking you. it forces it's way out of his mouth, not giving him any choice in the matter. at first he doesn't care, but then you can practically see him go though all five stages of grief.

"wait, wait, wait," he presses his hand over you mouth when you begin to speak, "don't say anything. i—god, let me ask you for real. i want it to be special, not something i say randomly,"

you listen to him patiently, waiting for him to stop before pulling his hand away from your mouth, "that was special, silly,"

he gives you a dirty look, "uh, no. i don't think me proposing to you in a hotel bed is special,"

"i think so. it's like.. you really couldn't wait to ask me,"

"i couldn't wait,"

"and i can't wait to answer you,"

he stares at you, taking in your expression. you're smiling at him, a soft smile that he hasn't seen from you before. it's different than all your other smiles, he doesn't know why. this one feels like you can understand the feeling that he has for you; something way beyond love.

"will you marry me?"

you giggle, a grin breaking out onto your face, "can i answer this time?"

he nods.

"mhm, i'll marry you,"

"thank you,"

"you don't have to thank me,"

he smiles, "yeah, i do. thank you for letting me into your life all those years ago and thank you for letting me stay in it," he leans forward, pressing his lips against yours, "i love you more than love."

author's note new layout!!!! anw the song doesn't rlly have anything to do with this LOL but it represents how he feels about u trust + i miiiight make this into a mini series w the hyung line :3 like how they propose to u

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sigmasemen · 2 days

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WHEN THEY GIVE YOU THEIR COAT. (1/2)

multiple blue lock characters x reader

tags: established relationship, tooth rotting fluff, short headcanons.

taglist: n/a currently.

characters: jingo raichi, meguru bachira, yo hiori, kurona ranze, sae itoshi, gin gagamaru, michael kaiser, kenyu yukimiya, alexis ness, gender neutral!reader.

word count: 2348

extra notes: reposted from my wattpad ^—^ !! older work… you cannot get me to read this shit. had to post it in multiple parts sorry y’all!!

JINGO RAICHI:

- He's definitely the sort of guy to get embarrassed that he did it. However, he'd also do it for the sweetest reason. Even if it comes at his own expense.

- Probably something simple. A sudden snow storm during your date, he realizes you're shivering as you walk home. At first, he tries just giving you his mittens but your shivering gets worse.

- "Just- Just take this." He throws his jacket over you in seconds, not making eye contact as he does it. You smiled like an idiot when he did it but he just played it off.

- You end up keeping it for a long time, and even though he's embarrassed about the story behind it, he thinks you look really nice in it. He's even got a photo of you in it that he gushes over!

- "Gushes over" mostly internally. He tries his best to never gush aloud about you. A hard but needed challenge.

- One of his friends tease him about the jacket though (Probably Bachira) and he ends up shouting at him to stop laughing.

- The walk of shame to Ego's office to ask for a new coat because his old one was "lost" was known amongst all teams for months.

MEGURU BACHIRA:

- Another sudden storm on your date, except you're both out of a restaurant. (McDonalds, specifically. He took you there because he knew it was gonna rain and he wanted somewhere closer to home. You ended up spending too much time fooling around on the kids area (got kicked out because you're both teenager.))

- Bachira doesn't notice at first. In fact, he's shivering himself. He loves thunder and even attempts to jump in puddles with you.

- Even though you're cold, you try your best to focus on your lovely boyfriend's smile and how happy he seems doing this.

- And not the freezing feeling you feel in your hands and thighs.

- Except after one of his louder and harder splashes, you shiver quite intensely.

- "Oh? Oh!" He probably looks so shocked, but immediately gets close to you and throws his jacket over the both of you. Even if a good portion of Bachira is sticking out of it, he doesn't care.

- "First one to my house wins!" And even though you made it, soaked beyond belief (mostly your lower halves from bending over/standing on tippy toes to each other) you're both more than happy.

- For a while, then you realize you're both sick the next day.

- And even though Bachira's teammates tease him for making a mess of himself and getting sick because he wanted to please someone? He smiles and laugh. "It was worth it!"

YO HIORI:

- Hiori is deemed the prettiest and one of the most "gentlemen-like" people in Blue Lock due to how nicely he treats you. This story was actually quite expected and really not a shock at all. They all sort of shrugged it off as they heard and told the others, "Yeah, not a surprise.

- It was a nice day in Blue Lock, the birds (Ego) were chirping (yelling to get to work) and everything seemed to go soundly. Until a certain coach decided that it was too warm and chose to turn up the AC as high as he could.

- So, almost immediately? You were shivering in your spot and holding onto yourself.

- Until a certain pretty boy walked up behind you and tapped your shoulder. He smiled for a second and asked if you were alright.

- "Oh! Yeah, I'll be fine."

- Hiori pauses and smiles, then wraps his coat around you. "Does that feel better?"

- You pause, then quickly nod and tighten your grip on the zipper of it. "Thanks!"

- Almost immediately does he sit next to you. He isn't a super social person, but that's fine. You aren't one either.

- It's the rare comfortable silence you get around here.

- You fumble with the jacket in your hands, feeling at the pockets until you grasped something. You glanced up at a distracted Hiori, already staring at the corner of the room. So, you dug through your pockets and noticed something.

- "Is this 9S?" It was a small can badge.

- Hiori looked your way and gave a short laugh, "Ah, it is. It's a self indulgent purchase I made last year..." He scratched the back of his head, "Sorry about that!"

- "No! I love 9S!" Your eyes practically lit up as you leaned towards him, "His design, his character, his lore, he's so investing!"

- A pause came from Hiori, before a smile spread across his lips.

KURONA RANZE:

- Kurona is the more silently romantic type. He's not the sort of guy that'll be super PDA like, but he will do a lot of romantic things in private. Like giving you his plate, or letting you touch his shark plush. Hell, he'll even let you feel his teeth and show them off them you ask about them.

- However, the most notable experience of all with him and his private displays of affection are when you two were having a casual walk through Blue Lock. You were just discussing how you wanted to become the best strikers together and your plans for the future, then he paused.

- "Are you cold?" He pointed at the bodysuit, ignoring the fact he was in an identical one. Maybe it was because sharks were secretly warm blooded...

- "Just a bit, I'll be fine!" You smile, then resume your conversation where you had left off.

- Though Kurona was physically present for the entire thing, he seemed to have more on his mind.

- And this somehow led Kurona into your dorm late at night, dropping his jacket off at your dorm along with a note. You knew it was simple, but the small shark doodle with a thumbs up along with his slightly sloppy hand writing made you smile.

- From there on, even if it inconvenienced you, you would wear his coat constantly. During matches, in public, whenever. Every time Kurona sees you with it, it makes him nod. He doesn't smile much, but he always has a slightly less neutral expression his face and occasionally is more touchy.

SAE ITOSHI:

- Sae isn't a particularly romantic person, he only acts romantic when he's dating someone. He's significantly more subtle with his romantic actions. You have one of his jerseys? You probably took it from his locker.

- You've actually given him more of your clothes than he's given you his. He doesn't wear your clothes unless you really nag him about it. Then he'll do it just to make you smile.

- However, there are rare instances where he'll give you just a bit of attention. It's not super pampering, but he will give you his stuff. Specifically his coat if you look cold. It's rare, he does end up asking for it back, but he loans you it a lot.

- You've told him countless times he doesn't have to, but he keeps doing it.

- It's nice. Honestly? It smells just like him. It's surprisingly clean 90% of the time.

- On more often occasions, you're wearing his jersey to surprise him. He always tells you to take it off because he doesn't want it to be messed up (he trusts you, just... Not with his clothing.). He still thinks you look nice in it.

- He gives you one of his coats and jerseys more permanently after you get married, and then has to pry his eyes away. It just makes you want to wear it all the more.

- He has a small photo of it that you gifted him in his bottom drawer. He sometimes looks at it but hides it for the most part.

GIN GAGAMARU:

- Gagamaru has a hard time realizing when hems actually being romantic or nice. He does try really hard to make you happy and do all the romantic things in the world for you.

- However, jackets.

- He never understood why partners were so into giving each other coats because he could only imagine how the smell of the jacket would be. Not that you smelled bad, of course not. He thought you smelled great. It would just be foreign.

- However, that all changed when you first offered him your jacket. It was after a chilly day and you wanted to be romantic, so he took it for your approval.

- He wore it for a few days without complaint. He even asked Isagi to wash it a few times. It was a lot different than he'd thought. It was like carrying a bit of you around everywhere you went. Like he had your arms constantly around you. A constant memory of you in his mind, no matter what he was doing.

- He took a lot longer than necessary to give it back, but he gave it back when you needed it again since you were cold.

- You even when he did it, "Isn't this my jacket?"

- "I thought we were sharing it now." He reached over to pat your head gently.

- Well, you accepted pretty quickly that you were going to be sharing a jacket with Gagamaru from now on. Not like that was an issue though. You enjoyed it.

#bllk #bllk x you #blue lock #x reader #sae itoshi x reader #sae itoshi #bachira meguru #bachira meguru x reader #gin gagamaru #gin gagamaru x reader #jingo raichi #jingo raichi x reader #yo hiori #yo hiori x reader #cupid’s bangers

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dyke-pollinator · 5 hours

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This is a bit of a personal question so if you don’t want to answer I understand if you just delete this ask but

As a relatively younger trans woman, and especially new to actually exploring my sexuality…at what point do I feel like a lesbian? Like I always feel bad or weird for being attracted to lesbians. It always feels wrong or amoral or like I’m lying in some way idk

I apologize for taking a few days to answer this my dear anon. A combination of Pride and IRL stuff has left me exhausted and I wanted to make sure I really took the time to give you a good answer and my bad for the wall of text you're about to receive lol.

There's a lot I could say about this. For the sake of this post, I'm going to assume that by "younger" you mean both in your transition and your age. Transition is hard. Finding yourself is hard. To answer your question, it takes Time. And I mean this in two specific ways:

Transition is a slow process. As you continue your transition, (whatever that means to you, whether that be social, medical, both, or neither, or something else entirely) you'll find a lot of things just making more sense. The labels might slowly start to be more comfortable. Or maybe they wont, and you'll switch to new ones, but that deeper sense of understanding yourself doesn't really go away (trust me I've changed both my labels and pronouns multiple times now lol). Either way, despite anything else, over time you'll just start to feel more at home, both in your body, and how you present yourself to the world. Now this is both the scary part and the hard part: you have to take steps to find a community who accepts you as you are, and (ideally) with people like you. Yeah this requires you to put yourself out there in a way that will be uncomfortable at first. Yeah, sometimes its going to go poorly, and you'll be rejected, or shunned. And yes, it will take its toll on you mentally, emotionally and (sometimes) physically. Its worth it. Having those people in your life does more than you can know in learning how to love and accept yourself. Having people look you in the eye and tell you that they love you, they see you, you're valid in who you are, no matter what anyone else says, is just so crucial.

You just get older. I know for a lot of people that can be frightening (and like, yeah, sometimes), but I can tell you with full confidence, I LOVE being in my 30s. You couldn't pay me to go back to 20. Your teen years and 20s are fucking hard. You just get so much better at knowing which things to give a shit about in your life and you get the necessary resources to be able to not give a shit. Most days I feel like a lesbian (more of a Dyke but w/e), so I am one, no one can take that from me, and the people who dont like me using that label can fuck off. I wear more masc clothes and have more masc hobbies because I want to and that doesn't define my gender or sexuality. I like doing mutual aid projects, and working on honing my DIY skills. I love the people who are in my life and tell them unapologetically, and I appreciate every day I get to spend with them. As I get older, the more I feel like "me" and the more I learn that in reality, I do love that person. She's actually pretty great.

I hope you can trust me that it gets better. That, in spite of all the pain, all of the heartbreak, the loss and tribulations, its fucking worth it. I know I didn't think so for a long, long time. But my god I am so happy I made it here. You'll get to that point to.

#asks #Gonna tag the shit out of this even when I usually dont since id like folks to see it #trans #transfemme #lgbtq #queer #lesbian #transwomen #lgbtqia #transbian #trans woman #nonbinary

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gatoplaga · 28 days

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"But beyond all my pain, there was you"

Narilamb designs: @runningwithscizzorz

here's an alt version of Narinder without the veil!! :D

#I added that detail last minute and my poor government laptop was about to explode from the amount of layers that I was using–#it wasn't even that much! just uhh 95 I think?? I normally use like. 150+. But this poor laptop is not built for that #The tools were starting to lag and the program froze for a couple of seconds before starting to work again and it was a whole mess so #I couldn't put a lot of detail into it #but I'm still pretty happy with the result!!#I love Lisey's design so much specially Narinder's #I really wanted to make fanart for them and I finally got to finish it!! there was a lot of trusting the process in this fjhsd but it was #definitely worth it. I think I exceeded myself. Very proud of this one.#even though I couldn't put the amount of detail I would have wanted to because of the laptop's limitations.. I did the best I could with #what I had and I think it looks good! so. yeah. hehe.#I hope Likey likes it if they see it heh (⁠*⁠´⁠ω⁠｀⁠*⁠)#cotl #cult of the lamb #cotl Narinder #cotl Lamb #cotl the one who waits #cotl narilamb #cotl fanart #narinder x lamb #gpart

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sluckythewizard · 3 months

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these are A BIT OLD but uhhh here check out these aggio doodles i did forever ago. still VERY happy w my colors :3

#this was back in uhhhh jan 2023!! hot dog!! and its still perfeclty good to eat!#i think kian and chip would get along. they could talk about feelings. kian could give chip the therapy he needs. maybe kiss? who said that #jay and rand could also get along i think. smoke buddies. cigarette fans. i bet they could play dnd together. or build a contraption togeth #also WAUHG the way i colored in kira here is SO PERFECT.. SHES SO SPARKLY N PRETTY. ALSO THAT HOOORNN i remember bleeding for that #shading is HARD lighting is HARD drawing a crazy unicorn is HARD but SOOOO WORTH IT I SITLL LOVE HOW IT LOOKES.....#waht else is there. oh yes the prime defender doodles #i love mark so much.... i miss being crazy and strange abt mark winters... i need to draw him killing more people someday #anyway i gotta go to bed soon to keep my sleep schedul on track but I DONT WAANNA!!!! recently relistened to bitb. that might release spore #im also chippin away at that am i in heaven animatic between workin on commissions. I GOT RLY FAR!! i think that i could finish it within #like. 3 or 4 more inspo waves. it wont be unfinished forevcer..... its so close... just 4 more full scenes to rly fleshh out #so basically another 2 years. YEAH BABy. in the meantime i have a backlog of things i can poast. i got plenty o drawings and doodles to sha #alrigh thats all the ramblin im gonna do for now. sleep well everyone hope shool or work goes easy on u in the coming week

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gunpowdercarousel · 7 months

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Me, the DM: Alright guys, what're your characters for the new campaign? Remember, we're starting at level one.

Bill: Alright cool yeah no problemo, so I'm like a legendary folk hero guy, right? EVERYBODY knows me. I'm super famous. I'm like the hero of the Sword Coast, I've killed minotaurs, stopped cults, fought devils in the Hells, saved the world countless times, all that jazz. Also my dad's a duke, I'm rich, and there's this really hot demon lady who's my patron.

Me: Uuuuuuuuuuuuuugh-

Carla: Oh! I'll go! So I'm a badass tiefling lady, I've been fighting in the Blood War for a decade, I've killed loads of demons - like SO MANY demons - and also my heart is an infernal engine. So I'm constantly on fire basically and anyone who touches me gets burned to ashes instantly. Like just boom dead. TOASTED.

Me: UUUUUUUUUUGH-

Gabe: Lame. Alright, so check this out. Lemme lay this on ya, right? So you know Mystra, the Goddess of Magic?

Me, visibly terrified: .............uh huh?

Gabe: Heheheheh. Yeah. Uh huh. That's right.

Me: .....What-

Gabe: Fucked her.

Me: UM.

Gabe: Also I'm a nuclear bomb

#and then liz is just like “yeah I'm a fighter and I have a longsword”#for real tho #it's funny that half the party is just like “yeah here's a completely reasonable level 1 character with some slight backstory to work with”#and then the other half's like “i have ten levels worth of backstory and the feats of a hero of legend”#like who in their right mind would look at gale's backstory and go “yeah seems reasonable”#“you're a doomsday device and you've fucked a goddess? sure yeah that works for level 1”#amazing #hilarious #and then lae'zel is literally just Some Gith #astarion's just had a shitty life for 200 years #and shadowheart is just a standard follower of shar #pretty much anyway #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate iii #bg3 memes #lae'zel #karlach #gale #gale dekarios #karlach bg3

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justalittlebluetiefling · 1 month

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The big problem with getting my bookshelves up and my books on it is that I am remembering that I used to dream of owning all of the Wheel of Time books in hardcover.

#i am actually debating buying one of them per paycheck for the next 5 and a half months #that is how long it would take for me to get the ones i am missing #so yeah on the one hand yay organization #on the other hand fuck me now i want to go buy so many more books #and let me be clear i was not holding back before #i had 3 stacks of books next to my bookshelf #2 stacks of books on TOP of my shelf #and another small stack of my nonfiction books in the closet #so like #the only thing holding me back before was that i was in a major reading slump and pretty much wasn't reading anything #but now that i'm catching up on a decade's worth of new books that have been put out in the world all bets are off #personal

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idsb · 21 days

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Yogurt boy because of the invisible string lyric and then he just became yogurt boy cause well there was nothing else going on

I actually used to follow a blog who PRE breakup in early 2023 had said wow he hasn’t booked a role in a year, what does he do like is he auditioning or what and someone was like, he’s just doing his side hustle which is working at that yogurt shop and it was like 5 people but it stuck with me and that’s all I think when someone refers to him as yb even though it’s 100% born out of invisible string and some people making jokes about Taylor comparing her sitting in a park writing songs probably on break from a studio session and he’s at a yogurt shop selling yogurt as a teen meanwhile she’s a country superstar in the making and I guess they felt she was trying to force a string 😭

I'm absolutely rolling at "what does he do" dhjfjgkshkg that aspect of this is extremely funny

#the latter part of what you said is where it becomes problematic for me though #like yeah she was leaving studio time sitting in the park because she had a pretty privileged life and was very lucky!#he was raised as a bit more of a working-class person #and like. idk bro that's...#not worth laughing about to me?#the whole point of the song is like #'these coincidences don't REALLY line up that much / we existed in separate universes for a while #but ISN'T IT PRETTY TO THINK we were fated to be together anyway?'#it's kind of simultaneously misunderstanding the song and acting like the idea of someone with a reg 16 y/o job going far in life #is wayyyy too crazy to be with someone successful who had an easier life in some ways which. I really don't vibe with #and this interpretation takes something really wholesome - her daydreaming about what he was like when they were younger -#and just makes it a Bad Vibe #sorry bestie #I loved the beginning of what you said!

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averlym · 9 months

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which is gayer? SIX or Adamandi (real)

adamandi

#like. gotta break it to you. one of these musicals is canonically lgbtq and it's not the one where women sing about their dead husband yknow #like. idk what to say! but <shrugs>#ask me stuff???#must say the fandoms are really quite different. i'm quite fascinated by the dynamics tbh #also i realise a lot of the queendom(? forgot that was the name for a hot sec) go mad about women in shiny pretty costumes slaying #but also hmmmm adamandi is very much gender for me.( for all the characters. but specifically vincent and beatrix)#and the thing about queerness is it literally gets woven into the narrative. and it's Obvious.#smth about canonical lgbt+ rly is just. it hits. the representation is real? as opposed to fandom interpretations only #(and like... i love fandom interpretations and when people can see a new side to the character that they feel seen in!!!)#(but having it be in the original content is just... yeah... you do feel kinda especially seen)#watching adamandi was a bit like first watching firebringer for me? like except for sexuality it was gender o.O #firebringer was the first musical i saw with a canon wlw couple. and like i'd known that girls could like girls for a while but #there was the small italicised oh moment where i was like ''this is actually real'' <it's maybe worth noting i wasn't very active on soc me #about consuming things other than content. so i wasn't very exposed to the community at large. so representation in media mattered!!>#similarly it's been a while since then and both online and irl i've found people who are more open about it and accepting. i've been very #very lucky in that sense. to have specific irl friendgroups where we're all out to each other <based on sentiment? i think most of us #including me. aren't openly out irl> ... and online i'm really glad to have friends who Get It and are similar to me. but the representatio #... !!! omg hsnfjkfgdsdsghf yknow?? the representation in adamandi really got me. the pronouns thing especially.#and because the core source material is Like That.. existing fandom is all accepting already. so bonus points i guess #sorry i have turned this silly little question into a reflection prompt.. but. thoughts.#[wow. on further retrospection i've never outed myself at all online either people just saw the ship art and Inferred and]#[to be fair they were Not Wrong. idk. tumblr avvy is very vastly different from irl me but neither of us feel comfortable stating it so-]#[also worthy mention of the musicals fandom that exposed me to the whole concept of lgbtq+ being a Thing at the ripe young age of 14]#[what a way to discover it. really. i say this with extreme fondness. conversely i have friends who decided through genshin or anime so idk #<i'm aware of the diverse casting thing for six!! i think it's very cool!! i also realise the show plot doesn't really have much to do w it

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doctormage · 6 months

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morrigan is actually so nice to you when you first meet her & when you wake up after the battle (as long as you’re nice to her). I love it when she’s a cunt don’t get me wrong I’m just like. this game certainly was made in 2009 with the presumption of a mostly white cis dude audience wasn’t it

#which yeah so was pretty much everything but #idk! I’m just having morrigan thoughts as I am wont to do #is she nice bc she’s lonely & likes you thus far or is this abt flemeth’s idea of manners #are we autistically following a script #(not that that would make it disingenuous at all. again I’m just Thinking)#actually just got ‘I would’ve rescued the king! a king would be worth a much higher ransom than you’ LMAO #so I think she’s just being herself 😭🖤#anyway. I love her #da replay

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cuddlytogas · 3 months

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Fyre sent me an article that made me Lose My Mind, so instead of sending 800 tweets about it, I decided to just write up my thoughts here

so, in re: ET Fox, 'Jacobitism and the Golden Age of Piracy' --

Fox is definitely exaggerating. His logic jumps from 'ship names and alleged toasts', to 'every pirate was one contact away from a confirmed Jacobite', to "a Jacobite maritime community" (296), with little evidence beyond each previous assumption. He does demonstrate a link with popular Jacobitism, but overstates pirates' political commitment by far.

There's one letter to George Camocke, a Jacobite naval officer, suggesting that the pirate fleet should unite under his command and take Bermuda as a Jacobite base, but the source is shaky, and it went nowhere once Woodes Rogers ousted the pirates. (It's I think from 1718 and unsigned? Possibly from Charles Vane and his crew? Fox only says that, "Through these contacts [unspecified, between Vane and English Jacobites] a letter reached George Camocke" (286), which is suspiciously vague, and I can't access the original to check. Either way, it would still only prove the committed politics of one crew.)

Fox also makes a lot of Archibald Hamilton, governor of Jamaica from 1710-16, who commissioned and profited from the anti-Spanish privateers who turned pirate and made up some of the original Bahamas pirates c. 1715. Since "it has been suggested that [Hamilton] was a Jacobite supporter" (283), Fox claims that these establishing pirates were also committed Jacobites, and therefore the whole pirate community that grew around them must have been. (Which leads to Fox then being baffled when there's no direct evidence of Jacobitism among some of them, such as the crews of Anstis, Fenn, or Rackham.) He relies on these assumptions, and then claims that every connection between pirates proves their mutual Jacobite sympathies.

It's much more likely (and in line with the historians I've read so far) that the Jacobite toasts and ship names speak to a broader anti-authoritarianism among pirates, with no evidence of committed Jacobite actions by them, eg, specifically targeting Hanoverian ships, or materially supporting or trying to support Jacobite rebels beyond that one letter. Indeed, the 1710s/20s pirates are generally agreed to be distinct for not adhering to religious/national loyalties like the C17th pirates usually did. (I'm so sorry, I haven't consolidated my notes yet, but I know Marcus Rediker goes through this, as does Kris E Lane, and I think Tim Travers and David Cordingly.)

Fox does identify a correlation between the rise and fall of Jacobitism and piracy over the mid/late 1710s, but attributes a pretty shaky causation: pirates ceased their Jacobite loyalties due to the suppression of Jacobitism in Britain and Europe. A much more obvious explanation is that both anti-authoritarian movements simultaneously flourished in the post-war, post-succession instability, then were both quashed as the new regime established itself and cracked down on rebels.

So, did many pirates espouse Jacobite sympathies? Yes! They named their ships in favour of Jacobite causes and rulers, and there are plenty of reports of them toasting to King James / the Pretender. (Which it must be said, although the sheer volume lends a ring of truth to the trend, individual claims should be taken with a grain of salt, as Jacobitism was a common accusation against criminals at the time, with or without a basis.)

Does that mean that the 1710s Caribbean pirate community was centred around a heart of politically committed Jacobites, as Fox argues, or largely motivated by Jacobite sentiments? Yeah, probably not.

Anyway, I am SO sorry that this article got me riled up XD the whole point of this is to say, I've never read anywhere that "many pirates were Jacobites driven out of Britain", which I KNOW wasn't even your main point, but I am unfortunately Insane. We can and should talk about expressions of pro-Jacobitism and actual political engagement among 'Golden Age' pirates, but what we know of their actual actions and espoused ideals doesn't speak to a trend of committed Jacobite politics beyond a general loyalty to rebellious causes.

#history #pirates #pirate history #Jacobites #Jacobitism #Togas does meta #this article annoyed me so much omfg #at every step Fox makes a sort of shaky assumption and then bases his next assumption entirely on that as if it's a proven truth #it's like IF hamilton was a commited jacobite and IF that loyalty was shared with the privateers and IF those privateers #retained and spread that belief among the growing pirate community and IF that was the belief that held the community together #then yeah sure i guess jacobitism was a core cause and concern for the golden age pirates #but that's a lot of fucking 'if's among a situation with a lot more obvious explanations #Fox is right that historians so far are probably ignoring the influence of Jacobitism on golden age pirates a bit #it really hasn't come up in all my reading so far and I've done... a pretty fair amount lol #but he goes so far in the opposite direction that it's kind of embarrassing #very BR Burg coded tbh XD (i say as if i've actually read burg >.> but all the reviews are forming a picture for me...)#EDIT: it's also worth noting that Jacobitism was rarely (never?) a charge laid against pirates in all the trials and moralising against them #which you'd think - if they were actually hardcore individual or broad-base supporters of the cause - might've come up more often #but anti-pirate arguments basically always revolve around the threat to trade and property therefore nation/empire #if lawyers and reverends wanted to argue that pirates were traitors - and they did! - you'd think they'd mention any actual treasons #EDIT EDIT: N: Harry M. Lewis (2021) George Camocke’s 1718 Proposal of a Jacobite–Pirate Alliance #The Mariner's Mirror 107:3 pp366-370 #has better detail and context for that letter

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my-name-is-daniel-yes · 1 month

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#A lot of the youths in singapore at least probably sleep late because of how much work teachers like to assign #especially on home-based learning days #I'm pretty sure teachers just hear that we're going to do the studying by ourselves at home and then assume they can assign more work #I woke up at 7 to do most of my HBL work #That's 3 Economics questions two of them worth 6 and 8 marks and one Accountings question of filling out a General Journal #as well as 2 self-study packages #Then read analyze and annotate for Literature on a half-broken website that would randomly highlight entire pages instead of what you chose #and the pages rotate wrongly #Once I was done I had to travel for CCA for an hour work for an hour and commute back home #By the time I got home it was 6 #It was Maths after and then more Literature because we were assigned to comment on other students' annotations after the were done #It's nearly 10 and I still have a Literature essay to do a full PBQ with introduction three paragraphs and a conclusion #The only way I can get a healthy amount sleep of 7 hours is if I sleep now since I need to wake up by at most 5 #But yeah sure MOE. You're trying to reduce student's stress and recommend us to take care of ourselves #im working for a paper that will take me 3 years that will be useless unless i either go to university or god forbid the army

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honeysunchild · 1 month

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It really hurts when it feels like a friend you considered family gives up on you and the relationship

Like, we could have talked about it, we could have found a solution together, we were each others family remember?! But instead you chose to just give up and cut me out

#and in like #about five messages too!#that were pretty accusatory #like apologizing peofusely bc youre afraid that karma wikl fuck u up for hurting le #doesnt really make up for accusing me of what you did #there are so many more compassionate ways you could have said that!#I'm so so sorry but you suck and i can't take it anymore goodbye #WTF #is this the goodbye seven years of friendship is worth??#we went through thick and thin #and yeah i have not been too well lately and i was pretty depressed two years ago #you asked me to share my problems with you and when i do i am too much and you drop me like hot metal instead of talking about it?#and that goodbye was so rushed it felt like i was chasing her just to get a little closure #you said you would always be there #even with our lives being so different I still believed it was possible #and you kept ignoring me!#i shared good stuff too and you didn't even respond! you said you were too busy and didn't make time for me #so when I stop sharing that good things happen to me too bc I'm frustrated with being ignored all the time you say I'm toxic for only #and drop me? instead of having a talk about it or taking a break?#like #i thought we were each others family but it seems like I was the more loyal one who cared the most and got burned yet again #is it so hard to talk and try to adjust?#i thought we were the real ones for each other yanno but clearly thing were different for you with all your toxic ass family and all your #jobs and friends #she's always had more than me #doesn't mean I'm alone tho #i have friend who can talk to me and try to adjust and fix the relationship and is a true loyal friend #it's not the end of my world that you're gone #even if you were a big part of it #how can I loose when I was so loyal and true and honest

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boxwinebaddie · 18 days

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Miss Ninaa!! When are you free for the summer???

hello, sweetling! and good morning, good afternoon or good night wherever it is that you are. <3 regardless of the time of day, please just know that the world around you is brighter bc you're in it. c':

so i just want to start out by saying that i know i say this a lot...but i cannot tell you what it means to me that you guys care enough about me to be curious about the trajectory of my offline life.

...like, i really just have the sweetest anons in the world, huh? ;-;

i feel unbelievably blessed and count my lucky stars everyday because of each and everyone of you. thank you for being your lovely, lovely selves and caring not only about me as a person but my silly and strange au styles from hell.

speaking of, i am aware that it does not seem like it because of how sporadically i post ncu related content ( if at all ) but i am trying to work on some stuff...as you know well by now, i like to really take my time putting out my work because the quality of the content that you read is paramount to me. you are all far too near and dear to my heart to receive lame, rushed, unclear boof ass content from me.

like...i simply will not do it. thank you for your paitence.

( i will say that i am specifically working on an ask about the greenhouse kiss which AAAAAA giggling, twirling my hair and kicking my feet, like it is SOOOOO satisfying, holy shit! it's also very, very important to the plot which is why i have been taking my time on it. i do hope to put it out today but i am trying not to make promises that i can't keep, get your hopes and dreams up just to dash them and most unfortunately, i do not have a great track record in that regard. i know it's kind of a bummer...but i like to be honest w/ y'all. )

ANYWAYS!

without further ado, here's a little glimpse into my life. xx

again, thank you for asking...that is very cute of you. c': <333

( this is lengthy and lowkey irrelevant. you can absolutely skip this but i think that i am pretty informative in here, so it might be useful? idk. )

so actually, my summer is pretty busy and jam-packed for the most part! or, the first two months are, at least. because i decided to take on summer camp here at the school i work on! camp counsellor nina!

i decided to nab a summer camp supervising position for a couple of reasons. like, obviously, teaching does not pay that much, so really, i need to make all the money i can while i can. don't worry about me tho, guys. bc actually am doing extremely well for myself. <333

( i am a very lucky person, haha -- god nerfed me by being mentally ill, but did make me pretty and personable...which gets me far in life. on the topic of mental illness [ of which i am very ] today i should fare quite well bc other than having a mild headache and being lowkey naseous because my mood stabilizer has that side effect for me...it is worth it when i rem(ember) to take it because it makes me very calm and level, so i am better at responding to my asks/doing my tasks. )

another reason is it keeps me busy...when i am not constantly busy, i get very depressed and fall into gnarly sprials. my job has a lot of downtime and when i am not running around like crazy because a bunch of teachers are out, i'm bored as fuck and i get lazy or restless.

very lame...this summer, i will be looking for a different job ( fml, if you are my boss, don't read this ) and i am a bad procrastinator so i missed the deadline for a fuck ton of teaching positions, but hopefully i can find something in the realm of associate or assistant teaching because....lmao, point and laugh but i am still a little too nervous to teach a whole class by myself. if kids get disadvantaged academically because i am too incompetent at teaching, i will die.

but yeah...if i am still babysitting fourteen year olds after this ( they did grow on me, but it's really not my speed ) please also point and laugh because i would rather go back to retail...yes, i am desperate.

on the subject of teaching kids that are in my wheelhouse and doing stuff my speed, summer camp is actually all k-5 so i will FINALLY being doing a majority of my teaching in the age group that i have my literal credential in. YAY! it's going to be hot as shit where i am over the summer, probably also tiring as shit ( have you seen how little kids act in the summer? ) but i am so fkn exCITED to work with the littles HEEEEELLL YES, BROTHER! uncle nina will be Vibing! <333

so for the first four weeks i am doing general camp stuff, getting a feel for stuff and wokring with all the grade levels...but the LAST two weeks, i get to specifically associate teach in the kindergarten classroom and AAAAAAAA!!!!! I FKN LOVE THE KINDERS!!!!! i visit them every other day because, again, i am bored as shit and they need help over there so i usually hang out with them in PE and play hula hoop tag with them...rn they are learning how to jump rope. soooo stinking cute, oh my god.

-- BUT YES I AM SOOOOO FREAKING STOKED YOU GUYS LIKE I WAS MADE FOR THIS BROTHER. i am gonna wear so many crazy outfits and do such weird makeup pray it doesn't melt off my face.

also, during camp, they go on little field trips and things, hopefully swimming, ( uncle nina is mermaid nina ) and feed you the same stuff as the campers so i get to eat like a nasty frat boy and have pizza and pasta and stuff, which, let me tell you, i am genuinely stoked because they cater a free lunch for the faculty here everyday and it's supposed to be all fancy and shit...but there is a reason it's free because it is SOOOO mid. like it really is kind of ass. i don't know how they do that.

but, sigh, camp is only six weeks so i have to fill my time with other stuff ( also i guess that means in six weeks from when school is done on june...14th, i think? i am free? ) i hope to use that time to structure the fuck out of my life, planf or the future because i am hella bad at it and i hope to do a lot of writing! kind of a pipe dream at this point becaue all my stuff has been *british tolkien vc* actual shite and i can't finish anything...but maybe when i feel better, writing will come easier? when i am less busy and stressed? i hope so. and i hope you guys are still around if i am here but i Completely understand if you are not! it's been a long, bumpy ride. you did your dues and you are free to step off at any time. again, i do not blame you. i am annoying.

BUT YEAH! that's my summer for you! summer camp, hanging out with my cat ( her name is lily, she is very beautiful, very kind, very fluffy and dumb as rocks but she is my babygirl ), getting lots of sushi, going to the thrift store, doing self care stuff, doing less self harm in various odd forms specifically in the form of self sabotage, getting my life together and organized, finding a new job, bettering myself and the world, being kind, entertaining all of you and hopefully writing again! yay! i'll update you as much as i can.

and please, please, pleeeease update me on your lives! i know i don't always respond, but i read everything. my friend who won FIRST PLACE for her raven sculpture, I AM SO PROUD OF YOU BABY. my friends who unfortunately went through breakups, i am so sorry, please know it is their loss, you are stronger for it and i hope you heal, but if ravesey can...you can baby. also proud of my various friends going to college and my friends that are not! my friends toiling through their lame jobs and my friends who are dipping their toes in the world of creativity through writing, drawing expressing yourself! i love, love, LOVE you! thank you for sharing your lives with me.

( speaking of friends, i am specifically hoping to spend my summer bonding with my rant girlies and we made a little group chat and we are being so funny and chaotic and unhinged. i love them all so bad. )

BUT YEAH! thank you for asking my love! look out for some important in character asks, hopefully some finished or more distinguished writing and know that if i am not responding or posting, it is not because i lost interest...as you can see, i am very busy, especially as the school year approaches an end, my summer is a little busy, i fall into ugly manic/depressive cycles and am working on taking care of myself...offline. thank you for understanding.

and thank you for being here! you are troopers, forreal! you are angels and saints for putting up for me and enduring me never posting or posting really chaotic weird stuff. i love you. thanks for caring. <3

i love you and i hope you heal,

uncle nina, future ceo of glamour girl summer camp <3

P.S. i am specifically working on developing and post more about my other aus because i want to give you some variety and challenge myself to do stuff out of my comfort zone! so if you are excited at all about the tsot/tfbw nina stuff, please make some NOOOOISE! lol and if you are not i totally get it, but if you could give me gentility and grace, i would appreciate it because i'm insecure abt it. MWAH!

#hi baby!#thank you SO much for asking you are so stinking cute for this like omg i am blushing thank you so much #i am working on answering some asks but its slow goings but i am emotionally stable nina today so hell yeah brother #i love the greenhouse kiss ask but it requires a lot of context moving parts and me explaining stuff thoroughly #thank you for being paitent i hope its worth it #i also don't know how much people care about my dead ass fanfic or any of my stuff but thanks for fighting the good fight #anyways! camp counsellor nina!#i get to work with the k-5 kids i am so stoked its gonna be loud and very hot outside but fun and enriching #very stoked to do something entertaining #when i tell you i am BORED it fucking sucks like this job is so ass and rn my school is kinda going through messy drama #so it's not pleasant to be here i am not having fun #BUT I WILL! and i have a lot of fun answering my asks hell ya #wokring on getting another job holy shit please pray for me #but yah! trying to be a better me and come back into myself and write more comfortably you guys are helping me #thank you for respecting my time and need for space #i am pretty introverted inspite of my little god complex big scary writer routine and i get overwhelmed by attention #i never quite know what to say but i'm trying #write to me anytime i love you #also i had a friend send me an ask and ask me if their question is odd -- it's not sweetheart i just don't have an answer yet #i haven't shdslkhdld thought about it hard enough but i will get back to you haha y'all are unhinged and kind and so cute #ily ily ILY

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