trying to climb out of a depressive episode feels like cutting off pieces of you that are rotten and seeing what's left of you
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i wish my hair grew like 12 meters right now
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i j remembered how like 2 years ago in school my friends went behind my back and told the school councelor abt how i was suicidal and self harmed and i was obvi mad at them but then somehow the popular girls found out???? (still v confused abt that) and then they said i was "ungrateful" and were j talking shit abt me because i was mad at my friends FOR A GOOD REASON!!!!
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meanspo ppl have told me irl
"why did you piggy around so much and get soup on your shirt?"
"you look like a dog that was stung by a bee" THIS IS SO FUNNY BUT OMG 💀💀
"are you sure we should go to brandy?"
"do you need like a bigger size for the pants?"
"you should really go to the gym more"
"being large really does run in your family"
"how are you STILL hungry?"
"should we really bring a snack with us?"
"how much food did you bring??" (at school)
"no youre not fat youre so pretty!" like girl..... yk damn well...
"do you wanna like.. bring a sweater with you?"
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guys i think loseit is broken coz who did this...
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i want long nails, long hair, thin body and a pretty face
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i literally feel like a shell. an endless void of who i was. im not manic, im not happy, im not. im just physically here. nothing phases me. i dont feel. i want to feel, i yearn to feel. but i cant. im stuck here.
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i want really long hair and i want to dye it purple or blue
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literally its so frustrating
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i j got complimented on my scars by my friendddd omg she even asked for tips on how to get scars like mine
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i want to be so skinny that i can fit into brandy
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