Opening Up by Jea

Sharing a post I wrote many years ago, and just updating things currently while expressing my emotions. I suffer from Bipolar, PTSD, depression, and anxiety. I, too, can hone in on my problems due to trauma, loss, parental abandonment, neglect, abuse, and other familial issues. When it comes to my family, I’m so quick to shut down, or get angry because I know what to expect from certain…

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Hard On Myself by Jea

As I delve more into counseling I am starting to explore and better understand my emotions. Looking at one of the biggest things that is a major hurdle for me. I guess being hard on myself is something I struggle with because growing up all I knew was negativity, anger, and resentment. Though in reality, the process is not linear, it might be helpful for us to break down what ‘forgiveness’, or…

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Life with a Disability

Adjusting to life with a disability…. or adjusting to a new normal is anything but easy. I wish I could say things are easy to adapt to but it’s teaching yourself to accept that things are different now and there’s no turning back the hands of time. It’s reality…and the reality is that I’m fighting not only the inability to not be able to work, the inability to control and manage my emotions, and…

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Untitled - Jea Personal Post

I suffer from Bipolar, PTSD, depression, and anxiety. I, too, can hone in on my problems due to trauma, loss, parental abandonment, neglect, abuse, and other familial issues. When it comes to my family, I’m so quick to shut down, or get angry because I know what to expect from certain individuals, and despite trying to set boundaries, my heartstrings tug at me because there is that little voice…

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Life Has Been Chaotic

It’s been a little while since I posted anything on My Bipolar Mind. I moved out of my mom and sisters’ house and got a room to rent with a private bathroom at the Hamilton Towers in my hometown. I pay $1000/month for rent or $500 bi-weekly. I believe I moved out sometime in the middle of March. I have been at the towers for almost a month already. When I first moved in, I had a roommate but we…

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Photo by Megan te Boekhorst on Unsplash It is almost 4AM and I am still up and wide awake. I waited too long to take my nighttime meds to make me sleepy because my alarm is set for 7AM to get up and start the process of getting ready for work after my morning coffee. If I take my meds now, I might not wake up when my alarm goes off or I will be too groggy to be alert and function at work. To…

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Guest Post: Follow My Journey by Jea Ward

Dear Jim, It’s taken me a long time to get around to writing this letter. I’ve been putting it off for years, to be honest, I suppose that I was waiting for you to get in touch with me. I’m writing because I have questions. I have complaints. People like to say that you can’t miss something that you’ve never had, but that’s a lie. I’ve never had you in my life like you should have been all these…

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Image by Екатерина Гусева from Pixabay I got home from work around 5:30PM, which was like an hour and a half ago. I ate homemade Pizza for dinner, courtesy of my mama, after not eating all day at work. So, now I am not doing anything and have no plans for tonight. I figured now is a good time to create another personal blog post. TGIF (Thank God It’s Friday), because I need a break after a busy…

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Manic Vents: March 11th, 2024

Photo by Iulia Mihailov on Unsplash It is 12:45 a.m. and I am more on the manic side right now. I should have gone to bed hours ago so that I could get enough sleep for work tomorrow. I am going to hate myself in the morning and I already know it. Lately, after my alarm goes off, I will set another alarm for 7:20 a.m. so that I can get 20 more minutes of sleep. Or I will go right downstairs at 7…

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Trying to Find Peace Within The Chaos

Photo by Jared Rice on Unsplash I feel like my life could be a movie on Lifetime or something. I’ve really been struggling with my Bipolar 1 Depression. I am still trying to catch up financially since my surgery on my right leg and not getting paid for like a month for being out of work for so long without pay, PTO, Sick, or Vacation time at my company. And I am apparently supposed to save…

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Sinking into Bipolar I Depression

Photo by Joice Kelly on Unsplash It’s just about 3:30 am and I decided to work on another personal post to try to utilize a healthy coping mechanism by blogging. I still have three hours before I plan on getting ready for bed. I will take my nighttime meds between 4 and 5 am. I just want to be in bed with my lights off by the time my sister gets home from work between 6:15 and 6:30 am. I just…

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January 15th & 20th, 2024

Image by Chen from Pixabay Tomorrow, January 16th, 2024, at 10:30 am, I have my post-op appointment and get my sutures removed from my right leg. The suture sites of my lower leg are still puffy, red, and swollen, but I also haven’t been resting my leg the way that I first did. I’ve just been completely restless and have been finding it hard to sit still and stay in one place. Being able to…

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January 6th, 2024

Photo by Vladislav Muslakov on Unsplash I wrote this on 1/6/24 and it is currently 1/15/24. I never posted it because I ended up going to bed and today I just remembered that I had this post in my drafts folder so I figured I would post this today. Thanks, Samantha Right Side of my Right Leg On December 27th, 2023, I had surgery on my right leg on both the left and right side of my calf just…

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Guest Post: Mystic World Wellness by Joanna

Image Credit: JoAnna H. Hey all, I would like to introduce Joanna H. from Mystic World Wellness to the My Bipolar Mind Blog. Joanna is not just the creator and owner of Mystic World Wellness, but she also happens to be my cousin as well. So let’s give a warm welcome to Joanna. Hello and welcome! My name is Joanna and I recently opened a Shopify shop called Mystic World Wellness. The website…

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December 21st, 2023: I'm a Mental Wreck

Image by Mohamed Hassan from Pixabay I have had several things pop up this month alone that have had an impact on my Bipolar Disorder and other mental health disorders. As I have mentioned in previous personal posts, I have been stuck in a Bipolar Depression but I will still have manic episodes while in my depressive state. When I get into a manic episode, it is a welcomed reprieve from the…

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Happy Thanksgiving: Remember to Give Thanks

Image by Deborah Hudson from Pixabay Today was a pretty good day. I got out of work at 1 pm today since Thanksgiving is tomorrow (already–I can’t believe the year is almost over!). Luckily at my job, I work in the office and not as one of the Direct Support Professionals (DSPs) so I have tomorrow off but return to the normal routine on Friday. For those who celebrate Thanksgiving, I would like…

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November 20th, 2023

Photo by Eliott Reyna on Unsplash I can’t believe it’s been nearly a month since my last personal post. Time has just been flying by between school and work and trying to maintain my mental health. Today started week four of my current class (University 103: Student Success). It is 10:30 at night currently, and I just finished turning in two assignments I had that were overdue and I also got…

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