#yiga clan are a pain in the ass
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Yiga clan - Run in at Fort Hateno
a new LU story it might become a series if people like it!
Wild loved the chain, and was overjoyed whenever he got to show off his Hyrule(it was to big to get through even a small section any time they were there) but in the name of Hylia could they not just get the message that Bananas meant assassins. Ya see wild new everyone in his Hyrule, and everyone knew him. Everyone also knew that people who didn’t know Wild or bananas ment really bad news. Everyone exept a certin group of Eight heros.
It was the second time being shifted to Wild Hyrule when it first came up, Wild mentioned it to the others when they actually first met but there were a lot of things happening that day. They were overjoyed to be home and hopefully finally show everyone everything, the first time they were shifted here they had to buy supplies, talk to Flora and Impa, deal with a black blooded monster camp, and a black blooded hinox, with that alone + the travel time there was no actual time to rest and do sightseeing. But this time Flora reported no strange events sence last time and they were currently residing at Hateno. Flora was visiting with Purah along side Time and Twilight , Legand and Wind went to get more Materials, and sky was just resting, so it so Wild and Hyrule wanted to explore, to there surprise Warrios went along with them(most likely to make sure there not gonna battle a lynle with a latel, two pot lids, and a mop but that doesn’t need to be said) Wild wanted to show them fort Hateno they’ve had to walk in that way but there main objective at the time was to get to Hateno village. Wild was hoping to show the little shack, harvest guardian parts, and fight a normal-blooded monster camp, atlest that was the plan.
They were currently surrounded by three yiga, another one teleporting around shooting at them, they should be able to deal with it but Wild was harboring a nasty gash in there arm and Hyrule having two arrows in him. and with the yigas teleporting killing four without getting any mote injuries was a hard task.
You may be wondering how the fuck this happened, well after the defeat of the calamity it seemed the yiga just got angrier, they changed there tactic traveling in groups without wilds knowledge, even then they were still always careful at there Hyrule. Bad news though, Wild seemed to neglect telling the chain about the whole "group of banana loving assassins all trying to kill them by dressing up as normal hylians" thing. I mean he didn’t realize any of them especially not WARRIOR would be that talkative, they also all know that everyone knows Wild and Wild knows everyone, so he assumed people asking where to find him would be a red flag but whatever. So there were three travelers that have never took that rout, Wild wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt, that’s until they asked Warrior if they’ve seen Link. Long story short Wild blocked what could have been a fatal hit on Wars, the three turned into yiga, and the fourth appeared. And right now there fucked.
No one was making a move, not even the archer. Then he heard it, the bows little bring, the arrow cutting through to air, it was going to hit warriors, who knows way hes there target but it seems there out to get him. Very un-gracefully wild pushed warriors out of the way once again then pushed himself into the side of the yiga jabbing into there side aswell as making them the new target for the arrow. It worked. It went straight into there chest as they retreated, right behind him Hyrule and Warriors started the fight with the other two there swords clashing with those sharp sickles, with the two ground soldiers under control wild started running and pulled out his bow, and an electric arrow. It was simple, shoot the electric arrow, then go in get the kill. It worked.
Its a relief they brought Hyrule because with the adrenaline now gone Wild finally felt there arm. Warriors also had an arrow in him, though it was a shallow wound. It seemed Wild, who in any normal situation would just pat it down until it stopped bleeding and maybe put on something with a longer sleeve was currently being forced to drink a potion and Hyrule was immediately fretting over his arm. "so champ" here it comes. "what in Hylias holy name was that about."
'its just a- like a little group, they like to take a crack at me every once in a while there really harmless, they just changed it up today a little also they are really not that great even with catching us by surprise for once.' he reverted to sign with bis good arm ofcourse not feeling like coming up the the words in his throat right now. And yes he knows he was playing it down, a lot, but Wild really didn’t feel like dealing with the whole "trained assassins who worship Gannon trying to kill him relentlessly because he killed Gannon and took down there cult leader" so here they are.
"this isnt a normal thing is it…" Hyrule seemed hesitant to ask, wild always kept a lot of his adventure close to his chest, he liked to tell stupid stories or talk about some of his adventures just in the actual wild but any specific details are only known by twilight and tike(even they don’t know much) 'eh its every once in a while, were going to be staying at Hateno though and there never in towns, they also don’t attack the same time twice in a row, about after every blood moon.' Hyrule just nodded, Wild couldn’t tell if he was convinced or not, didn’t really feel like figuring it out either. "well still up to showing us this Fort Hateno" and Wild gladly agreed to Warriors question.
It took about four hours to get there see the sights, fight monsters, do a little snooping in the scientists old cabin, and get back to Hateno. When the three got back the 6 heros were hanging out around Wilds house Flora and Epona aswell. Twilight ofcourse fussed over Wild when seeing his bandaged arm but They were just cryptic about the whole thing, Hyrule and Warriors were no help at all seeming to understand Wilds hesitance to tell Twilight that he often got ambushed by these assassins(ofcourse not knowing all the details) they all knew how Twilight and even Time would go all mother cuukoo on him.(hell it’s a surprise warriors didn’t)
#lu wild#lu#lu chain#lu warriors#lu hyrule#yiga clan#hateno village#fort hateno#yiga clan are a pain in the ass#fanfic#lu fanfiction#fanfiction#ao3 writer#read on a03#ao3 fanfic#my writing
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🐉))
While sky is asleep due to fainted from before the dragon halfling child would walk over and lay down on his chest/stomach area and lightly booping sky face to try to wake him up while he softly chips like he's trying to wake sky up from his faint episode.
Another thought imagine
The chain are fighting against the yiga clan at a unknown part of the desert and wild notice that the child is missing and yell out to the others on were the child but a laughter stop the group and they all see the yiga master in his hand have the struggle dragon halfling child upside down clear he have the tiny tail in his hand to do his villian speech but the child managed to grab the man arm and bite him hard as the yiga master let out a shout of pain. Yiga master drop the child and the child fell hard which broken his arm as he scream out in pain and calling out to his family which resulted the chain overprotective to hight over 9000 and be ruthless to fighting the yiga and time is heading to his child cut down any yigas that stand in his way and the yiga master try reach for the child but he get swinging roughly by the in pain,hissing dragon halfling child as time give the yiga master a death glance.
Time: I dare you to try touch my son. I promise you that you'll have more than a broken arm to worry about.
Yiga master back away fearing for his actual life.
YEAHHHH PAPA TIME!! GET HIS ASS!!
The first bit with Child trying out to wake up sky is so cute 😭😭
And also, i too would beat the hell out of the yiga clan if they broke the kid’s arm!!
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A List of the Shit I Pulled While Playing Breath of the Wild
For context, I didn't play this game until December last year. I had no idea about the plot for this game and I did some stupid shit while playing my first playthrough. Will update the list as I remember more.
Feel free to add your own stories.
PART 1 - RANDOM STORIES
Didn't fight any of the Bokoblins guarding the Temple of Time. I climbed through the window. Multiple times. Even after getting the Master Sword
Didn't upgrade my inventory space once. I got the maracas (a whole story of their own), gave them back, found a couple Korok seeds. But I never went back. I didn't bother
The Maracas Story: I attempted to clear the monsters guarding the maracas by using bombs. I knocked both of them off the cliff. But one of them fell onto a ledge and lived. So, I jump down to kill him and get the chest unlocked. Queue a massive cliff to climb. I used a lot of energy potions. The worst part? As I was reaching the last part, it started to rain.
Decided the best thing to do first rather than any of the missions was to go conquer as many towers as possible. Queue all the most pathetic attempts to climb towers without killing any of the monsters guarding the towers. I think I did like most of the one around Hateno and Kakariko before actually doing anything. Hell, I'm pretty sure I got the Wasteland Tower before I made my first attempt at a Divine Beast.
I tried Ridgeland Tower. Without beating a single Divine Beast. I tried about 20 times before deciding to do Vah Ruta
PART 2 - VAH RUTA
Spent like 15-20 minutes getting the Shock Arrows off Shatterback Point. Yeah, I didn't try and fight
Forgot Cryonis existed during Vah Ruta and Waterblight Ganon. I literally only found out because I tried googling tips
Broke Mipha's Spear. My biggest regret
Tried Ridgeland Tower again. Without trying to kill anything. At this point, I bet you can see a pattern
PART 3 - VAH RUDANIA
Didn't buy both sets of fireproof armour for Vah Rudania. I ran out of potions just before getting to the boss. I left, sold stuff for cash, bought the other armour and spent 10 minutes climbing the mountain to get back before realising I could teleport back
Didn't drop the bomb in Fireblight Ganon for like 5 minutes
Didn't properly attempt dodging until Thunderblight Ganon, so Fireblight Ganon was fun
Attempted to beat Ridgeland Tower without killing. It failed, I panicked and ended up killing the Wizrobes.
PART 3 - VAH MEDOH
I think it was round about here I tried to get all the memories. That's a dumb decision itself (especially Hyrule Castle and the ceremony site)
PART 4 - VAH NABORIS
Failed at Seal Surfing while trying to get on Vah Naboris
Avoided fighting the 3 Yiga Clan members outside the base by climbing the cliff
Unintentionally found the Master Kohga arena. I didn't jump in because I didn't see the objective point there. I thought I went too far
Didn't upgrade my inventory space so all my weapons broke fighting Thunderblight Ganon. It was a pain in the ass. I literally had to abandon the fight temporarily for a neighbouring room to kill a guardian and get a new weapon. That's how bad it was
PART 5 - HYRULE CASTLE
Finally got the Master Sword
Ran past the Guardians
Fought my first Stalnox
Finally mastered dodging
Used the Golden Bow for 10 minutes during the Dark Beast Ganon fight because I though the Bow of Light auto-equipped. My attacks weren't hitting and I thought I was missing until the message 'Your Golden Bow is badly damaged' popped up
After beating the game, I went back to the castle to try and find the library. I ended up in the Second Gatehouse. And that's how I fought my first Lynel.
To Conclude: I was a grade-A coward who'd rather dodge everything than fight the most basic monsters
#breath of the wild#the legend of zelda#i really enjoyed the game#fave character is either Revali or Urbosa#zelda needs a hug#link needs therapy
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🌟 with uhhhhhhhhhhhhh Zelda? ~sunlight-ships
Send a 🌟 + name and I’ll talk about my self insert’s bond to that character!
As no single Zelda was specified, I'll answer for Charlie, Lucien, and Ezra with their respective Zelda's (and to clarify, this will be for Skyward Sword, Breath of the Wild/Age of Calamity, and Minish Cap respectfully)!
✨Charlie never meets Zelda, but it's possible the pair would have got on fairly well! In a few instances I have imagined what it would be like if Charlie and Zelda interacted, Charlie would be sympathetic to her plight, and absolutely rip Ghirahim apart for trying to catch her and use her to resurrect Demise. Arguably, the stuff he goes through in my self fic is less painful than Charlie finding out he was trying to kill two teenagers LMAO
✨In contrast, Lucien does meet Zelda and is aggressively protective of her. Initially, Zelda does assume Lucien wants to hurt her as Lucien does have a well-known reputation for being a highwayman who has no issues with killing people (plus, whilst it's not known Lucien has connections to the Yiga Clan, people are aware they're pals with Eldoris).
But, once the two get talking, Lucien finds out about her life and struggles, especially with her father. So Lucien, being Lucien, decides to take matters into their own hands and beat the everloving shit out of Rhoam, only stopping when Zelda herself demands it.
✨As for Ezra, they would deliberately be the most annoying person to Zelda, but in more subtle ways than bombastic, like pretending to not hear what Zelda is saying or doing the opposite of what she asks. Naturally, the two wouldn't spend a lot of time together when Zelda is away from the castle.
HOWEVER, the very second Ezra finds out guards or anyone with orders given by Hyrule Castle have been tasked with apprehending or worse, killing Vaati, Ezra will be on their asses in seconds for even daring to entertain the idea of harming their twin. They don't fight often but also they don't take prisoners and Ezra knows who will be coming out of the fight alive.
#soz to four swords but i dont really care for the game#ngl i cant decide if lucien tells harbinger to break or rip rhoam's arm off but he deserves it either way#when you're a shitty good for nothing parent you're automatically in mine and lucien's laser sights#ask#ezra halycon#charlie somnia#lucien eden#I def need to like. work a bit on ezra and vaati's stories either in minish cap or in the context of my self fic#idk if I want to have them as separate stories or get time travel involved. we shall see
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What? No I’m not looking into how magic works in the Legend of Zelda universe so I can make Roy a fire sage.
What would give you that idea.
Ignore my google search history.
#thewriter; post#tbd#[ vanitas would be part of the yiga clan#and be a pain in the ass per status quo ]
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Whumptober 2021- The Darkness I Know
Chapter 13
That’s Going to Leave a Mark
"This is gonna suck” | burns
Fic Summary: After the world as she knew it was destroyed by the corruption of Malice, Zelda allies herself with her saviors from captivity: a disgruntled former governor, an alert paramedic, a cocky pilot, an excessively overt optimist, and a blind strategist. While the corrupted, malice-filled Yiga Clan looks for revenge on them, Zelda has to learn how important it is to find family in others... and how much more dangerous the stakes become if she fails to protect them.
Previous/ Chapter Index/ Next
~~~
When Link was in college, blundering his way though as an an aspiring academic with a heavy emphasis on “aspiring,” he’d found himself in his first serious relationship. He’d had one other date before that, but it had gone so poorly that he’d sworn off dating through the rest of high school. So, when he’d been—ironically— set up on a blind date with a girl named Malon, he hadn’t expected it to go well.
It had.
They’d hit it off immediately, and for over a year, they’d been in a good place. But in his first few years of school, Link was a slacker at heart, and Malon simply had too many ambitions to be held down by someone who didn’t apply themselves to anything.
When she’d left, he’d broken down for a bit. In hindsight, it had been the kick in the ass he needed to get himself into the right headspace to graduate with good grades, but at the time, it had been a soul-sucking gut punch. He thought nothing would hurt as bad as the moment he had his heart broken for the first time.
Then the Malice came and people started dying. He lost friends—good people— to the possessed monsters and murderous Yiga that were out there. His parents died.
And then there was Zelda.
He’d known Malon for over a year, and still, he felt a stronger connection with Zelda now than he had with his girlfriend then. Maybe it was something about the end of the world staring him in the face, or maybe it was just Zelda. Maybe she was the one and the universe was just screaming really loudly.
But that night, he wished he’d never met her, never needed to feel that constant pain in his chest as he waited for something to happen, that tightness in his throat, his tense spine. His abdomen twitched with nerves every now and then when he tried to breathe, and his hands shook as he carefully ran them through Zelda’s hair while she laid in his lap, whimpering in her sleep as she struggled to breathe in her own entirely different way.
He could tell whenever she felt a sharp pain, because her fist would snap closed against his shirt and pull, as if that could stop it. Maybe it did, because soon after, she’d relax her hand and return to her less overtly physical responses.
Selfishly, Link was glad he couldn’t see her like this.
He didn’t have to see the long cut on her arm that he could only feel with his hand. Her wound was bandaged, but apparently there were still visible signs of the Malice beneath. He didn’t have to see her sweating thanks to the fever she’d developed hours ago, or to see her face contorted in pain, though he knew from everything else that she felt it.
A few times, he’d traced his finger lightly between her brows, trying to smooth out the crease that had developed there.
But worse than all that, he was glad that he wouldn’t have to watch on helplessly if she died in his arms while he was trapped beside her. At least blindness gives him the illusion of pretending it’s not as bad as he knew it to be.
Zelda, who’d seen her whole village burn and been the only survivor. Zelda, who’d been kidnapped, tormented, starved, and left in a room to rot, and be saved. Zelda, who watched another village burn at the hands of a remorseless former friend. She’d managed through all of that with deceptive ease. But now?
She let out a soft cry, her nails digging into her skin as she tried to claw the bandages off in her sleep. When all Link heard was futile scratching, and winces of pain, he grabbed her hands and held them still until she calmed down and drifted back off.
Selfishly, for his sake, he was glad he was blind.
But for Zelda’s, he wanted nothing more than to see.
Right now, Zelda was down, and they both knew it. At her most vulnerable, it was up to Link to keep her safe until they had her back up and going. He was her ears, listening for every sound that might give away a threat. He was her eyes, staying awake for the night watching their backs in every way he could. He was her brain, trying to think of solutions, of ways out, if anything.
Link knew how much it sucked to rely on others for things. Even simple tasks were sometimes impossible for him. And now, for Zelda, the very act of staying alive was damn near impossible, if her squirming gave him any indication of her pain levels.
He had no staff. No weapons. No help.
Goddess, what was he going to do?
For now, all he could manage to do was to hope that she could feel his hand brushing her sticky hair aside again and again, careful to avoid her right side because she’d winced when his fingers brushed over the cut she’d gotten when they’d fallen into the river. He could only hope that she knew he wasn’t one of them, and that his arms were meant to be a comfort where he rested one on her waist, not a restraint.
He couldn’t know for sure what she thought or knew, though. She hadn’t woken up since the moment she fell asleep. If this was even sleep.
Link was sure he’d dosed off a few times, especially whenever he realized Zelda was in a different spot than he’d last remembered. Despite all his best efforts, he couldn’t keep himself awake the whole time, and instead pulled Zelda tighter to himself, as if that might stop anyone from coming for them.
There came a point that Link, despite the horrible conditions they were in, despite their certain torture and death, found himself blushing. He’d fallen asleep with his hand on Zelda’s lower back to hold her in place while she squirmed in pain, but woke up with his hand far lower.
“Goddess,” he muttered to himself, embarrassed that he could somehow feel embarrassed at all in this situation.
However, in that moment, something had Link’s attention, and it wasn’t simply Zelda. Though he wasn’t proud of practically groping at her, he felt around for her back pocket, realizing that the thing he was feeling had to be there. When he finally found it, his fingers wrapped around cool metal, and he felt the knob to slide a blade up from the hilt of her knife that she’d tucked away when they’d run from Kakariko.
He tucked it into his palm and pulled his hand between him and Zelda, unsure if anyone was around to see it otherwise, and he shook her as forcefully as he dared. He already knew light movements wouldn’t disturb her.
“Zelda!” he hissed into her ear over and over until her ragged breathing sped up with her return to consciousness.
She let out a low whine, and her hand instantly returned to clawing at her arm like a trapped animal might do, despite realizing the fruitlessness of their efforts. Link had her face in one hand as he kept trying to wake her, his thumb feeling her eyelashes too low for her eyes ot be open.
“Stop. Stop! Zelda, open your eyes! Come on, look at me!”
Her eyes fluttered, and he had to trust that she had her eyes on him now, alert enough for a conversation. “How are you?”
Her only response was a groan, and her body spasmed, as it had been doing repeatedly for hours.
“Zelda, I need you to look around and tell me if we’re alone.”
“I can’t,” she whispered, her voice barely there and broken from her earlier screams.
“You need to. I have an idea, but we have to be alone.”
He could feel her fingers curl around his shirt as she tried to pull herself up, despite her violent shaking. Link did what he could to help her, and after a long moment, Zelda dropped her head back down onto him, exhausted. “Alone.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yes.”
“Okay,” he breathed, pulling the knife out. “This was in your pocket. I don’t think they even bothered to check us, but I have nothing on me.”
Zelda shifted and her trembling hand touched the metal. “What?”
“Cut out what Malice you can, and there won’t be enough to kill you. It took a full night into the late morning for my parents. It’s only been a few hours for you. Get this shit out before it kills you.”
Her breath was shaky, but not as bad as her arm. She couldn’t even grab the knife from his hands.
“I can’t.”
Shit.
Link felt around her arm until he felt everything that covered her wound. With as much care and slowness he could, he cut everything away, using his finger to keep as much of a gap between her skin and the knife as possible so he didn’t nick her.
Peeling whatever it was away, he heard Zelda blanch.
“Bad?” he asked.
“Mhmm.”
“It reeks,” he agreed. And then with a halfhearted attempt at humor and distracting her, he added, “You should take a shower.”
She groaned, unable to bring herself to chuckle or react any other way.
He took her hand, just to feel how bad she was. Even he couldn’t keep her still.
“Oh, Zelda…” he breathed, shifting her around so he could lock her hand between his knees. “I need you, okay? I need you to be my eyes, and I’ll be your hands. Can you do that?”
Though she was leaning heavily on him, weak and limp, she managed to nod. “Y-yeah.”
Link ran his fingers along her arm, and immediately knew that this was not going to go well. They both flinched at the burn of the Malice as his fingertip bushed a wet, thick, gooey, warm substance that burned to the touch.
“Okay,” he breathed again, taking care to make sure he had long steadying breaths to try to calm his own nerves, which translated into trembling hands. Regardless, they were 10x steadier than Zelda’s. He let the knife hover. “Where?”
“Le-left and down t-towards you.”
He moved, and waited. “Here?”
“That’s the- the w-worst part.”
“Alright,” Link said, swallowing hard. “You can’t scream. It’ll bring them in.”
“L-Link. It h-hurts so bad. I can’t h-help it.”
Hesitating, Link’s mind scrambled as panic set in. Goddess, of course she couldn’t. Her screams from earlier flooded back into his mind, and he shuddered. “Into my shoulder, then. Muffle them as best you can. I don’t even care, bite down if you have to. Just don’t scream out loud. This is going to suck. Are you ready?”
“N-no, but d-do it.”
He brought the knife down slowly, stopping only when Zelda twitched in pain. “Le-left more.”
Feeling Zelda brace herself, tense and rigid and her mouth turned closer to his shoulder, he knew he was close. But damn, he needed to see what he was doing. His hand shook more.
The knife sank into the substance, and Zelda groaned. But Link couldn’t tell which way he needed to go, where was the best path, where was her skin, was it better to slice across or pry the Malice up and off.
“Oh, fuck it,” Link breathed before gritting his teeth and feeling around with his other hand.
He’d been burned by Malice several times. It was an inevitability living in this world. Usually, he’d feel it burn his palm when he’d accidently reach out his hand and land in it, or more often, around his ankles as he was forced to trudge through some. The burns were always temporary, but they left a lingering pain for a decent time even after they’d gone, like nerves being fried beneath the skin just enough to damage, but not enough to completely fry.
Never had he tried to navigate a delicate surface like someone’s skin, searching for a long wound with his fingers feeling more like he was searching through the ash of a burning fire.
And when he found it—the place where they’d dug into her skin to embed the Malice in as painfully deep as possible, to let it spread as quickly and efficiently as they could—he held his breath to steady his hands, and he dug the knife in.
Zelda bit into him like a vampire, suppressing a cry that still came out too loud and too obvious. Her hand balled into a fist in his hair, and he could feel her sobbing, her body rocking, and him needing to tighten his grip on her arm to stop her from flailing.
He couldn’t help the pained grunts he was holding in as well. The Malice was fire on his skin, and he couldn’t even fathom how Zelda was managing with it inside her.
Link was sloppy, his knife shaking, his cuts jagged. But he went fast, and he was done as quickly as he could manage, flinging the Malice off the knife and as far from them both as possible again and again until he stopped digging for fear of hitting her actual arm, rather than the Malice inside.
Dropping the knife with a shaky clank, Link ran his hand over her again, feeling for more. There was some, but it wasn’t something he was willing to risk doing without seeing. He’d done enough damage, but the price of doing nothing would have been far worse.
Instead, he felt around for the covering that had been over her arm before, and he reattached it, shoddily, but as best as he could manage. His hands were slick with Malice, and burns, and blood, but he wiped them off and readjusted the unsurprisingly-still Zelda in his arms so he could move again. He could feel her breathing, but she’d undoubtedly passed out from the pain, and for that, he was almost grateful, though he did lose his only means of seeing the wound.
His hands twitched, his body shook, and exhausted, his eyes drooped closed, if only for a moment’s rest.
#legend of zelda#modern au#post apocalyptic#whumptober2021#whumptober 2021#whumptober#no.13#this is gonna suck#basically blind surgery#Zelda is having a rough day#knife#link#zelda#zelink#whump#malice#writing#banned tag: blood#banned tag: burns
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Bitch you got a thing for ass eating, and we've hardly seen Sooga make an entire meal of Kohga's ass? FEED US (and Sooga) plz!
Yes we ABSOLUTELY can! Let's go!
"I can't fucking believe you."
"I'm sorry!"
Sooga didn't mean to, really he didn't. Even Sooga of all people were prone to mistakes, but he still felt AWFUL for it. Kohga slammed their door shut, locking him in the room with an angry looking Kohga.
"YOU. Of ALL people. I can't even fucking."
Sooga was on the the floor immediately. Knuckles against the wood, forehead at his feet, in a proper yiga apology.
"I'm sorry! It won't EVER happen again! I'm sorry!"
"Sorry ISN'T good enough! You know what? Ass on the bed, on your back. Mask off."
Sooga didn't want to obey, but he disappointed his Master, so he must. He laid down on the bed, shamefully removing his mask. Kohga stripped to just his mask, and got on the bed.
"Master Kohga-"
"Shut. Up. You need to apologize properly."
Then Master Kohga sat down on his face, facing the rest of his body. Sooga squirmed a bit as he felt himself struggle to breathe, when Kohga leaned forward, smacking at one of his titties.
"Eat. My ass. If you stop, I will not forgive you."
Sooga obeyed. His tongue graze along in between his cheeks, coating his ass with his drool. Kohga meanwhile, kept his ass firmly planted against Sooga’s face, and started to play with his titties. His hands were rough; kneading and smacking at his breasts through the Yiga clothes.
"That's it. That tongue better keep licking my ass. You want me to forgive you? You wanna be a good boy again? I want you tongue fucking deep into my ass, do you understand?"
Sooga gave his best attempt at a nod as Kohga pinched and pulled at his nipples through his uniform. They were rough, aggressive touches, and it made Sooga latch onto Kohga’s thighs, wanting him right where he sat. This may be a punishment, but god damn Sooga was enjoying himself. Kohga’s ass was...big. To be blunt. It was big, it was gorgeous, and it was something he dreamt of and touched himself to. It was an honor to slather it in his own drool, to-
"I FUCKING know you aren't listening."
Kohga yanked at both his nipples, making Sooga cry into his ass from the sudden bout of pain. Kohga let go only when he knew he had his attention, choosing instead to smack at his tits, roughly, befitting a punishment.
"That's right, you fucking listen to me. You piece of shit. Thinking you get to act like THIS. You fucking whore. Let me fucking see those tits-stay STILL!"
Kohga smacked his tits again, ignoring how Sooga’s back arched. He HAD been squirming, come to think of it. He forced himself still, save for some shaking, before he felt master Kohga tear at his clothes, giving him a full view of his chest. Red, enflamed, his chest had taken quite the abuse. And yet, Kohga wasn't done. He dug his fingers tightly into his chest, kneading them nice and roughly.
"That's fucking it. Look at your fucking tits. Nice and fucking red, because YOU decided you wanted to piss me off-so HELP me, Sooga, you stop eating my ass again, I'm going to beat the FUCK out of you, do you fucking understand?"
Sooga nodded. He kissed his asshole, before licking and slurping around the area, as some means of begging for forgiveness. He'd let his chest be abused for hours if he had to, let Kohga suffocate him with his ass for as long as he demanded of him. It all felt as good as it tasted.
"Are you serious-you're fucking HARD! Sooga are you LIKING this?!"
Sooga shook his head, rubbing his nose in between his cheeks. He heard more of his clothes tear, and he knew his Master was revealing his erection. He cried out into his ass upon feeling his Master pinch at his tip, forcing precum to squeeze out and onto his hand.
"You're fucking rock HARD! You think you get to like this? Yeah? You think this is FUN?"
Sooga felt his hand grip tightly at his balls, and he fucking knew when he came (if he was allowed to), it'd be a BIG goddamn mess.
"Oh look at how your fucking balls are swelling. You're a big, dumb, ass eating whore, Sooga. Aren't you?"
Sooga nodded, smearing his own drool onto his face. He had slobbered over Kohga’s ass like a dog over a Christmas ham.
"I fucking can't believe you. You wanna bust a fucking nut during your PUNISHMENT. Thats fucking it, you dumb bitch, you better make me cum within the next MINUTE, or your dick is going back in the FUCKING cage-"
No. Anything but that. Sooga was NOT going back in the chastity belt, constantly not being allowed to cum. His fingers gripped onto his thighs tight enough to turn his knuckles white, and he started to eat like a good boy. His tongue dug pushed itself into his asshole, he kissed and sucked and slurped gratefully, hoping, PRAYING that Kohga would forgive him. Kohga was pumping his own cock, he could hear it, and it somehow aroused him further.
"That's it, fucking SHIT that's it, you eat my fucking ass Sooga, I'm gonna f-fucking-"
He didn't even get to finish as he came, muttering such mean, cruel words under his breath. Sooga felt his asshole flex and loosen around his tongue, all while he gifted his already sore tits with his cum. They sat there for a moment, sweaty, cum covered, and exhuasted. Yet, Sooga didn't stop. He kept kissing, kept slipping his wet tongue in and out of his ass, savoring his Master's insides. Kohga scoffed, as if he was displeased.
"You fucking came. Fucking shit, you're COVERED in it. Big fucking load."
Kohga lifted himself up off his face, parting his ass a bit to reveal Sooga’s handiwork; a dripping, raw, satisfied ass. Anyone in the clan would LOVE to see such a lewd sight.
"You like eating my ass, don't you?"
Sooga swallowed, somehow managing to find his tongue again.
"Y-yes Master. I do. I really, really do."
"Of course. Idiot."
Kohga laid down on the bed, putting his hands behind his head. Sooga clung to him like a koala, still feeling guilt in his heart as he laid his chin on Kohga’s chest.
"Are you...still upset?"
"...kinda."
"I'm sorry. I mean it. I swear I mean it a thousand times over."
"Ugh. Alright. You know I can't stand seeing you beg like that. This doesn't happen again though, alright?"
"Yes, Master Kohga."
Kohga smooched his forehead, before scratching under his chin, just how he liked it.
Sooga was a good, good boy.
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**SPOILERS FOR AGE OF CALAMITY**
I just had a thought
What if Age of Calamity had a DLC where we actually play in BotW's timeline, and not the aoc timeline. "Eggbert", and Astor are never involved.
It would function like a Master Mode save. It's separate from the main game (but not harder.) Everything goes the same as what happened in BoTW
Battle of Hyrule Field still happens, but Link never meets Zelda, since Terrako doesn't lead him and Impa to her.
Harbinger Ganon doesn't exist, so the only mission that happens is in the desert, versus the Yiga Clan. Link killed a moblin, which definitely put him on the good side of the king, maybe he was ordered to be in the army that was in that battle of the desert, and he kicked ass, showing his strength to the soldiers. The Yiga Clan attacks still happens, but Link plays a lesser role.
Harbinger Ganon doesn't exist, so there is no attack on Korok Forest. A bunch of soldiers went into Korok Forest, knowing that one of them was the knight who sealed the darkness. Link pulled on the sword and released it, showing the courage he needed to pull the sword.
The road home is left unsieged. Harbinger Ganon doesn't exist, although it could something specific for Link to become Zelda's guard.
The towers are never found so the mission of Akkala tower never exists. Destroy the Yiga clan could maybe be replaced with a mission fighting Yiga in the Bazaar while protecting a helpless Zelda, who dies very quickly, so you better protect her.
Harbinger Ganon doesn't exist, no monsters attack Zelda When Courage Failsm. Maybe it could be replaced with the memory of Link killing a bunch of bokoblins and 3 White-Maned Lynels
Calamity Strikes is literally the exact same as in Age of Calamity. Black and Silver enemies everywhere, guardians shooting everyone, and the trio running for the hills. King Rhoam dies this time around since that one thing didn't save him.
The champions are left unplayable until you rescue them. Water and Fire & Air and Lightning never happen or at least, they don't play out the same. The trio are obviously gonna go try to save the champions, but we're given an impossible mission to complete, enter the Divine Beasts. Terrako isn't here, so it's impossible, and the Trio run off.
We're then given control of Urbosa and Revali/Mipha and Daruk. We're fighting the blights, (Urbosa vs Thunderblight, Revali vs Windblight, etc) both, at the same time, with 2 different characters. The catch is they don't lose health, they deal way too much damage, and you don't have food. It's designed to be an unwinnable fight, where you fight as long as you can, or give up and let them kill you. Once one of the champions is dropped to 1/4th of a heart (which you will), a cutscene plays where it shows the champion losing, then cut to black. It leaves you off with the other champion you were playing with (Urbosa/Revali or Mipha/Daruk), and you repeat what just happened. The champions are unplayable until you're done.
Mipha is dead, so Vah Ruta won't do anything to help Akkala Citadel, which means Link and friends can't get into it, which means everyone there dies, and Robbie flees. Maybe we play in that one memory where Link and Zelda are running through a forest, and fight Guardians.
Each Step Like Thunder is endless mode. Impa is off somewhere else, Zelda is following you around the entire game, and Hestu, The Great Fairies, and Monk Maz Koshia aren't unlocked. You can only play as Link. Monsters and Guardians are endless since Vah Naboris didn't take out those enemies. When Outposts are captured by Link. They're immediately taken back. Fort Hateno is constantly under attack by guardians. There are no healing items. It's pure pain, where you either give up, or fight to the end.
Once Link reaches a 1/4th of a heart, a cutscene plays. We know what it is. Zelda activates her power, kills all the enemies in the entire area, and ends the mission. Link is unplayable until you're done.
The Great Plateau is a mission you can only play as Impa. The mission is to get Link into the Shrine of Ressurection. You have to defeat a horde of enemies without letting his body (more accurately, the sheikah carrying him) get majorly damaged
All Hyrule, United is called With Power Awakened. It starts with a cutscene in Korok Forest, then cuts to Hyrule Field. You can only play as Zelda. The mission is to kill all the malice enemies, so that the barrier around Hyrule is broken. Zelda continues onward.
The Future of Hyrule. Only Zelda is playable, Harbinger Ganon doesn't exist, so Astor doesn't have his power, which means no hollows, and the blights are still in the Divine Beasts, so no blight fights. The mission is to get to the Sanctum. Calamity Ganon doesn't have a physical form, so you're fighting his spectre. Once he's half health, a cutscene plays which shows Zelda locking Ganon and herself up.
*FIN*
Easy and Normal mode don't exist. The game is perpetually on Hard mode, with an option of Very Hard. Once you finish the DLC, Link and the champions are brought back to be playable.
Sidon, Yunobo, etc, aren't playable cause time travel isn't here.
Hestu isn't playable because the circumstances are way different.
The Great Fairies aren't playable because they've been left unpaid tributes for a while in botw, and that applies here.
Maz Koshia isn't playable because he's still in the Final Trial. Waiting.
Kohga isn't playable because Astor isn't here, so the Yiga Clan isn't betrayed.
King Rhoam isn't playable because he was playable after the Great Plateau, and he died before the Great Plateau missions, so.
Terrako and Ganon aren't playable for obvious reasons.
It's only Link, Impa, Zelda, and the 4 Champions who are playable (or should be)
Damn I really just wrote an essay. Shame I can't translate this into school.
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Desired Fate, Chapter 15
Read on FF.net
Read on Ao3
King Rhoam had to collect himself, letting out a huff of defeat, grappling with whom he should be most angry. The thought occurred to him that he was partially to blame. What if his stern treatment of Zelda had stunted her ability to unlock her power, or worse... had chased her into the arms of that man? He feared it was true, but he couldn't let it show. This was one of the worst possible outcomes coupled with one he never would have imagined. It was a lot to take in, but he felt - no knew - that as King his immediate concern was the Calamity. Finding a fitting punishment for that man would have to be considered later - if there was a later, which was unlikely without Zelda's fully realized power. But Rhoam knew if he had the chance he would be willing to break her heart one final time if it meant that man was dealt with appropriately. In time, she would move on and she would thank him someday.
Rhoam surveyed the Champion's shaken expressions. The wind silently sent the tall grass rippling, giving an unsettled atmosphere in the wake of what had been witnessed. Rhoam turned his back to them, focusing on the beast that was encircling Hyrule castle. There was a long pause before he spoke. "Champions, it is time to take to your Divine Beasts. Although we may lack the means to seal Ganon away, we must continue to defend Hyrule until the very end."
Impa took in the expressions of the Champions and spoke. "Wait, Your Majesty. If I may… Astor gave a warning regarding the Divine Beasts, and considering that Ganon has already taken control of the Guardians I think we should listen. We must be prepared for anything Ganon may throw at us."
Rhoam turned. "Are you seriously suggesting we listen to the ramblings of that insane man calling himself a prophet?"
"But, Your Majesty… What other choice do we have?"
"Not a chance! I'm not going to hearken to anything that man has to say. By the goddesses, he's going to need someone holier than Hylia when I find him!"
The Sheikah woman shifted uncomfortably but stood her ground. "But, Your Majesty..." This time, Rhoam could detect the tiniest hint of disapproval in her voice, perhaps even veiled disgust, a tone that believed he should be begging Zelda's forgiveness for humiliating her and treating that prophet with such disrespect since it was so painfully obvious Zelda cared about him for some reason Rhoam couldn't comprehend. "What about Princess Zelda? I'm worried for her."
"You think I'm not?" Rhoam said, irritated.
"We can't be so quick to give up on her, nor can we discount the effort she has put in. If we take extra precautions we can still use the Divine Beasts to locate her. I choose to remain optimistic and believe she will access her power very soon."
Rhoam was at a loss. Impa was too much like a friend to Zelda, not the advisor he had appointed her to be. He was baffled at how she did not at all seem angered by Zelda's shameful display and complete abandonment of her duty. Rhoam was about to rebuke the Sheikah woman when the four champions and Link gave a nod of agreement at Impa's words. The King stood silently as the group began to devise a plan to oppose the blights, should they appear.
oOo
Zelda opened her eyes and looked around, assessing the place Astor had taken them. It appeared to be an area of the Lost Woods she was unfamiliar with. Yet there was something distinctly different about this place from those dreary woods. There was an abundant amount of Silent Princess flowers everywhere, more than Zelda had ever seen in one place. She knew immediately that there was something otherworldly about this place.
"No one will bother us here," Astor said calmly. Zelda could tell he was growing more accustomed to her touch. He was not as eager to let go of her as he had before. The shoulder of his robe was damp from her tears. The prophet took notice but mercifully said nothing.
"Where are we? It looks a bit like the Lost Woods, but… It's just so beautiful." She looked up, seeing stars dimly giving their light through the canopy of the trees. Was it always night here? A beautiful, illusionary realm where time remained still?
Astor gave Zelda's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "It's a place of respite I think. I found this place after I cut ties with the Yiga Clan. And I think for you, rest is well deserved."
Zelda dropped her gaze. "How can I rest when everyone is facing the Calamity, while I am here in relative comfort and safety? Already, Father has accused me of running from my duty… And he has no reason to think otherwise… At least from his perspective. I..I'm so ashamed. I can only hope that with your words, the Champions will be safe." Zelda said, tensely, still trying to recover.
"He's an ignorant old fool with neither the blood of the goddess or the gift of prophecy. As a prophet of the Calamity, Ganon impressed its fear of your power upon me, sending me visions of things to come, so I know you will awaken to your power soon. That is fate's true course that Ganon seeks to upend. And, I'm not unaware of how hard you've tried. I have watched your pains to unlock your power for some time now." And it was true. All those years he had watched with calm assurance that Calamity Ganon would rise and bring Hyrule to its knees, she trained by praying in freezing cold water until she collapsed and bore the brunt of her failure that only stung more as the years rolled by.
Zelda gave a small nod of acknowldgement, although she was too broken down to take much comfort in his words. She wanted so much to touch his face and tell him how much she loved him, but she held back, not wanting to feel any more vulnerable than she already did. She was afraid she might hurt him on account of the fresh bruise he had received. It was clear that her father had struck him. "I was so afraid of what Father might do to you. I'm so sorry for asking you to accompany me back to the Castle". H-he's a mean old man…" Zelda sniffed, breaking into a relieved but slightly tearful giggle.
Astor smirked slightly, finding Zelda adorable in her moment of catharsis. "You managed to abide that man for seventeen years? I see that you are stronger than I would have thought. And don't be sorry. There's nowhere else I need to be except by your side."
Zelda smiled a bit at his words. It was such a relief to see her smile again.
Astor continued. "I never thought it possible, but you were able to pull me back over the threshold and away from Calamity Ganon. No one has given me the amount of consideration you have."
Zelda's lovely green eyes lit up and Astor knew those dark days serving Calamity Ganon were finally over, and most surprising to him, he hadn't realized how awful those years had been until now. It was disorienting, like waking up from a distended dream. And he couldn't resist her any longer. No one had ever held to him or looked upon him in the way she did. He couldn't be the one to help her unlock her power, he knew that, but he wanted to at least pretend.
"How can I help you unlock your power…?" There was a sensual note in his voice, as he cupped her cheek, still damp with tears. Zelda's breath hitched in anticipation as he dipped his head to meet his lips to hers. She gave a small sigh of happiness, trapping his lips with hers, wishing she could savor the moment for all time. A single tear slid down her cheek, feeling a sense of release, drinking deeply of that kiss. She pulled down the hood of his robe, being careful to avoid the bruises on his hollow cheeks as her fingers grazed his pallid skin.
"Take all that you need from me," He breathed between kisses, taking her in the most intimate embrace before grabbing her under the ass and hoisting her up with some effort. Zelda gave a surprised but pleased sound.
"Exquisite..." Astor complimented, giving it a squeeze.
Zelda giggled and kissed him again, slowly, intensely, though she wobbled a bit, Astor struggling to support her weight. An intoxicating warmth spread throughout her whole being, her body yearning for his undeniably. But a dim feeling of sadness began to creep in as she wondered if they ever truly had a chance to be together that wasn't in secret. Would anyone ever accept them when there were so many reasons they would object? He would likely be put to death, and she'd have no say in the matter. Yet she couldn't stop herself from loving him.
If I can't realize my power, there might not be life after the Calamity, Zelda scolded herself.
Astor gave a pleased laugh. "Alright, Your Highness. You're breaking my arms." He set her down, with an apologetic look.
Zelda uttered an almost involuntary whimper of longing, reaching out for him again, her anxieties starting to overtake her again as doubts plagued her more than ever. "Lay down with me while I fall asleep?"
Astor gave her a stunned, blank expression for a moment.
"Hey, don't make this difficult." Zelda teased, pulling at the strings of his robe.
"Y-yes, Princess" Astor laughed as they kissed, carefully taking off his gold belt, the string of beads around his hips, and collar that hung over his shoulders. He helped her remove his robe, which was held together with hidden clamps. Astor draped the robe over her shoulders, and Zelda wrapped it around herself like a blanket, taking a moment to enjoy its softness and the warmness of it.
Zelda's gaze moved over him, admiring his silhouette. Under the robe, he wore a high-collared crimson shirt and a pair of black riding pants that did not appear ancient and worn like his robe.
They laid down together on the moss-covered ground. Astor slid his hand under the robe which was draped over her, sliding his hand over the curve of her hip where the folds of her pure white dress gathered. His name escaped her, softly. Zelda raised up slightly to lean on his chest and kissed him vehemently. Astor greedily wrapped an arm around her waist, kissing back with savage abandon.
Zelda drew away slowly, pushing his braided lock of hair away from his eye absentmindedly, noticing the fine lines under his eyes he hid under dark makeup. His dark brows tensed as he smiled a bit, giving her an affectionate but pensive gaze
Zelda sensed there was something he was keeping from her. Like there was something haunting him. Was something going to happen to him that he knew about? He was a prophet after all. She couldn't imagine the heavy emotional toll that came with glancing one's own future.
Zelda could barely keep her eyes open. It wasn't long before she fell asleep in his arms.
"Happy Birthday, Princess…" Astor had waited such a long time for this fated day, the day Ganon would rise. Yet, he was not spending it as he would have originally envisioned. He could barely comprehend that he was lying next to the Princess of Hyrule, helping to comfort her on her darkest day. And for the first time in his life, he understood what it was to love and be loved.
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The fact that I can’t save in the Yiga Clan hideout is gonna be a real pain in the ass
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im on the verge of pulling my hair from my head i am so bad at stealth WHY DOES THE YIGA CLAN GOT TO BE SUCH A PAIN IN MY ASS why cant i just murder my way through this stupid place
Ahhh it truly is bananas
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What's the darkest thing you'd like to see (but will never see) in the next Breath of the Wild game?
Nintendo said Breath of the Wild 2 is going to be the darkest Zelda game ever. Here's my personal and not too serious list of dark, twisted things I'd love to see in the game but that will never happen.
- The Blood Moon has the additional effect of driving people insane. During the Blood Moon phase travelers who were once friendly attack Link. Also the Blood Moon has a very happy face.
- When getting lost in the woods, skull kids appear from the fog and beat Link's ass with deku sticks while playing trumpets.
- Zelda gets insane after spending 100 years inside the stomach of a giant boar with no-one to talk to except the giant boar itself.
- The Sheikas are yet again a clan with dark and bloody secrets, the kind of people who hide torture chambers behind the graveyard.
- Therefore the Yiga clan guys are even darker, the kind of people who let their kids play in the torture chambers behind the graveyard.
- Lynels are ridden by skull kids playing bag pipes.
- Gerudo sacrifices voes to the Goddess of the Sand.
- Ganondorf stays dehydrated and crawls like Kayako in the Grudge.
- Boar Ganon is just like in Breath of the Wild, but every time Link hits him he screams in pain like a pig in the butcher house.
- Everybody dies, except for one skull kid who plays the ending song. And it's the happiest song ever.
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My Top Threes in The Legend of Zelda Breath of the Wild [Part 2]
Here comes my favorite quests in BotW! It was quite hard to pick favorites because there were a lot of choices but my number ones are solid ones. I haven’t played the expansion packs so I haven’t considered quests exclusive to those in my rankings.
Favorite Shrine Quests
3. The Stolen Heirloom and Watch out for the Flowers. This two tied up on third and I liked them both because of their story. The Stolen Heirloom is such a drama and Watch out for the Flowers is pure crazy lmao
2. Korok Trials. Well, it is technically a side quest but also the collective of the whole Lost Woods’ shrines. It is really engaging starting from entering the Lost Woods to clearing all its shrines. It could be borderline frustrating and infuriating because a little mistake could lead you starting all over. But, once you've completed everything, it was really satisfying.
1. Stranded on Eventide. This is my top pick mostly because it feels like that one episode in Fullmetal Alchemist where Edward and Alphonse returned to the Yock Island to recall the fundamentals of their alchemy.
Favorite Side Quests
3. Take Back the Sea. I've come across the side quest pretty early in the game and I think this is the first combat-type side quest I got. It quite appealed to me because of the “hero” feel of the quest, like you gotta beat some monsters in order to help the poor villagers live their normal life.
2. The Thunder Helm. Another hero-esque quest but yeah, Riju is cool and bad-ass.
1. From the Ground Up. Who wouldn't include the Tarrey Town adventures on their list of favorite side quests? You helped build a whole town! Isn't that wonderful?! And it's not a one-shot do-this-and-that task; it's something you get done along the way. It's really meaningful and beautiful.
Favorite Main Quests
3. Seek Out Impa. This is the first main quest you’ll get as you leave The Great Plateau aka The Tutorial Stage. It shows how open-ended and wide BotW could be. Yeah, what should do next is seek out Impa but you never know where your adventures would take you.
2. Captured Memories. Oh, those beautiful memories. Finding each of the memories’ location is fun in itself, but those memories themselves are beautiful.
1. Divine Beast Vah Naboris. The best part of this is infiltrating the Yiga Clan Hideout. Sneaking around the Yiga blade masters is a whole ton fun! Though they may not be very keen guards, that one-hit KO and infuriating foot soldiers will surely drive you nuts. And, the thing with bananas is bonkers. But, in the end, dealing with Thunderblight Ganon is a sure pain, it’s worse than dealing with Calamity Ganon himself.
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Long walks call for long talks. And this is a very long walk.
Woohoo, actually getting stuff done! Have more Feral! And, oh, what's this? Myth actually put some serious stuff in there?? What???
I mean it isn't a lot but it's there. Just a hint, just a start.
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"So..." Feral began, and Twilight mentally prepared himself for whatever he was about to say. "Hero of Twilight, huh?"
That wasn't what he was expecting. "Uh... yeah?"
"Why 'twilight'? I mean, if you look around you can kind of guess as to why Wild's title is what it is, but how is one a hero of a specific time of day?"
"Well, it's kind of complicated." Very complicated, actually, but seeing as they likely had plenty of time to talk... "See, with my journey, the word 'twilight' represented... a lot."
"How so?" Wild asked. He eyes were focused on the Master Sword as he guided them forward, but his ears were pricked up, intently listening.
He had to think over this. While he hadn't been very closed off about sharing about his adventures, talking about the 'Twilight' specifically was something he'd avoided. Too many memories. Too much of her. Still, they were asking a sensible question. "Well, the most obvious to the majority of people is that in my time, Hyrule was in a sort of state of perpetual twilight for a time."
"Huh," Wild said. "That makes more sense than I thought it would."
"Yeah, it's pretty straightforward when you look at it that way."
"Hang on," Feral said. "You said that was the most obvious. What else is there?"
"Well..." Twilight swallowed. "The 'perpetual twilight' thing is more complicated than it sounds. It wasn't really being a permanent time of day for a while. In reality, it was caused by twilight magic."
"Twilight... magic." Feral looked skeptical. He was good at that raised eyebrow look.
"It hails from a parallel world known as the Twilight Realm, populated by a tribe known as the Twili. So, yeah, the word 'twilight' represents a lot of things." He shrugged, hoping his discomfort wasn't visible. Some of memories still pained him. Actually, a lot of them did.
"Wow. They should have gotten more creative with the naming. I mean, sure, the Twili live in the Twilight Realm, makes sense, but isn't saying twilight magic caused an era of twilight a bit too redundant? I mean, the word is already starting to sound foreign I've said it so much."
"It makes sense though. Easy to remember stuff," Wild pointed out.
"Sure, but it's super unoriginal."
"You value originality so much?" Twilight asked. Feral had made several comments on the matter since meeting him, so he was somewhat curious to his reasoning.
"Of course! Makes life more interesting. Like, sure, you can always take out a bokoblin the classic way by stabbing it with a sword, but it's way more entertaining to hit it with an arrow just right so it knocks into a bees' nest and then runs and drowns in a river an attempt to get away. You get what I mean?"
"That's... oddly specific."
"Oh, I remember that! Wasn't that one of those bets you make with passerby?"
"Yup. Got an extra 50 rupees from that."
At this point, Twilight wasn't completely surprised. It was all to fitting that Feral would do ridiculous things on some kind of bet or dare. Maybe that's how they earn a living. Although he had to wonder at exactly what angle you needed shoot a bokoblin in order to get it to hit a bees' nest. What sort of archery were these two doing? Come to think of it, there was still a lot about these two that remained a mystery to him. "Alright then, your turn Wild. What all is there to that title?"
Wild hummed in thought. "It's kind of weird, in a lot of ways. I mean, looking around, it seems like a straightforward title. This," he gestured with his free hand to the surrounding forests, "is what most of my Hyrule looks like."
Twilight thought about this as his eyes flicked across their surroundings. That statement unsettled him, though he couldn't quite place why. "You mean as in forests and the like?" He knew that couldn't just be it, but he wasn't sure what else there was.
"No. I mean, yeah there's forests, lots of forests, but that's not what I mean." Wild's ears twitched, and Twilight caught a hint of frustration in his voice. "What I mean is- it's like-" His hand opened and closed as though trying to grasp at the right words.
Feral stepped in at that point. "What Wild is trying to say isn't about how many trees there are. How long have you been here?"
An odd question. "Several days at this point. Why?"
"How many people have you seen?"
The question startled him, and the realization that came with it nearly knocked the wind out of him. "Other than those that were with me, only you two."
"Bingo. That's what Wild's saying: most of this Hyrule is empty wilderness, populated only by wild animals and monsters."
Twilight blinked. "But there are people, right."
"Well, yeah," Wild said, speaking up again. "There's several villages and settlements here and there, like Kakariko Village and the Zora Domain. Stables are set up periodically along the road too."
"Yeah, but..." Twilight couldn't believe he hadn't noticed their apparent solitude until Feral had pointed it out to him. "We've been walking for a while and have seen no trace of any people at all."
"Part of that is that we aren't on the roads. Most other people traveling use them, out of safety and convenience."
"Still, normally there would have been something..."
"Normally for you, maybe. I meant it when I said this place is empty. The nearest settlement is, what, a day's journey?" Feral looked to Wild.
"Two, if we went in that direction." Wild pointed somewhere to his right. "Going the way we are, more like three days. That's to a stable, though. Nearest actual village is more like a week's worth of walking."
"And that's assuming you keep up a good pace and stop as little as possible."
Twilight was shocked. This time was really that open and unpopulated? Sure, it had been awhile since he had seen an actual town or anything, but a lot of that had been a combination of world switches and some level of actively avoiding too many normal people. But to be able to go so long without even seeing hints of any kind of civilization... well, he was glad they had a map. "Wow. Hero of the Wild it is."
Wild was unsettlingly quiet for a moment. "Yeah," he said eventually. "I guess it sort of fits. It's just... nevermind."
That bothered Twilight. It bothered him a lot. The sudden somberness in him was... well, it was offputting. Goddesses only knew what he was thinking about. Then again, he was a hero. If Twilight had learned anything from meeting the others, it was that no matter what, each one faced their own forms of trials and suffering. He himself had seen and experienced so much heartache in his journey. Judging from the scars he could see lining his face, there was no doubt Wild had experienced his fair share of pain in his travels. It's possible that the conversation had somehow brought up bad memories. That kind of thing just came with the territory of the calling, he supposed.
He decided it would be best to change the subject for the time being. "Do you often go off road when traveling."
"Huh?" Wild seemed to be snapped out of whatever thoughts he had. "Oh, uh, yeah. It's sometimes faster to just head directly to someplace rather than take the road. Besides, I can gather food and stuff on the way."
"It's more dangerous though, right?"
"Well, yeah, but it's not too bad. Besides, the road isn't completely safe either."
Twilight knew that roadways weren't always safer than just trekking off through the underbrush, but he wanted to keep the conversation going. "How so?"
"Well, sometimes monsters camp along the sides of the road waiting to ambush passerby. That, and sometimes the passerby themselves... aren't exactly friendly."
Now that was new to him. "Oh?"
"Ah, yes." Feral nodded sagely. "The banana fuckers."
"The what."
"Banana fuckers."
"They aren't banana fuckers, Feral."
"Link, we've talked about this. You cannot tell me that some of them don't shove bananas up their ass. I'm nearly positive Kohga did it as some kind of ritual."
"You have no evidence that he did."
"You have no evidence that he didn't!"
Twilight rubbed his chin, now somewhat regretting changing topics. "I'm afraid to ask, but what in the name of Hylia are you two talking about?"
"The Yiga Clan." Wild said. "They're basically a tribe of Sheikah that went bad and seek to kill the 'legendary hero'. Also they have a weird obsession with bananas."
"Yeah. Banana fuckers."
Alright. Evil Sheikah that were into bananas. The more he learned about his Hyrule, the more he felt he understood Wild's unorthodox way of looking at things, and the more he was fairly sure his perception of weird was changing. Although he now had a new appreciation that they weren't taking the roads. He'd rather deal with bokoblins than an actual person trying to stab him.
#twilight: weird tablets? evil sheikah?#what's next#spiders that chase you and shoot lasers?#wild: about that....#twilight#wild#feral#feral and wild#the chaos verse#linked universe#linkeduniverse#the legend of zelda#legend of zelda#loz#link#wild is lost in thought#what could he be thinking?#banana fuckers
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Shadows of the Yiga | Chapter 22
Revali leaned back in the large, leather chair. He rolled himself away from the table, spun himself around, then rolled back, kicking his feet up on the table as he did so. He folded his hands together behind his head as he rocked slightly. “This is nice. Why don't we do this more often?”
“Because this is not a place to hang out,” Zelda hissed. As she walked behind him, she pushed against his chair, forcing him to sit upright, his legs sliding off the table and back onto the floor. “Need I remind you that I am your queen.”
Revali mocked her quietly, folding his arms together and turning his nose up at her. “Most loyal subjects have not seen their queen in her underwear.”
Zelda threw a book angrily at him, and he ducked with a snicker at the last minute. The Champions were all gathered around the table, per Zelda’s request, and were anxiously waiting for answers.
“Can we get with the program?” Riju said, jabbing her finger into the table.
“Why are you here, anyway?” Revali sneered. “You're not a Champion.”
“Sorry,” Urbosa said, rolling her eyes. “You know she's too young to stay home alone. I had no choice.”
“Shut up, Urbosa!” She elbowed her sister. “I'm twenty-four!”
“Remember when you were little and cute?” Revali said with a wide grin.
“That little girl could kick your ass,” Daruk said with a slightly disinterested tone. “In fact, I'm quite sure she has.”
“Can it, Steroids.”
Daruk flexed his arms. “All natural. Don't be jealous.”
“You wanna take this outside?” Revali stood, his palms against the table. “'Cuz I'll take this outside!”
Daruk stood over him and grinned. Though Revali was barely of average height, Daruk was very large, and he almost towered over him. Revali slunk back in his chair, defeated.
“It wouldn't be a fair fight,” he muttered. “You and your super freakish strength.”
Zelda sat at the end of the table, shaking her head in her hands.
“It seems they're still stuck in high school,” Riju said. “Bragging about whose superpower is better.”
“At least we have 'em,” Revali said with a grin, but to his surprise, Riju reached over and shocked him lightly on the nose.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Guess it runs in the family,” Urbosa said with a yawn. “Play nice, Riju.”
“I've never read a comic where the super heroes argue like teenage girls,” Daruk said.
Riju snorted. “What comics are you reading?”
“Speaking of super heroes,” Revali said, turning to Link who had been oddly silent through the whole thing. “If this is a superhero meeting, why is this loser here?”
“Hero of Hyrule,” Riju said. “Duh!”
“Hero of Hyrule with no more super sword, if I remember correctly,” Revali pointed out.
Link slunk into his chair, ignoring Revali's teasing gaze.
“What's the matter, Mr. Hero? Out of comebacks?”
“Don't piss him off,” Aryll said as she came around the corner. She wiggled her fingers in the air. “He has super evil dark powers now.”
“Aryll,” Zelda started. “I don't recall giving you an invite.”
She sat in the empty chair beside her brother. “And here I was thinking it got lost in the mail.”
“Aryll,” Zelda warned. “This is -”
“A super secret meeting about Dark Link. Yeah, I know.”
The room fell silent.
“What's Dark Link?” Daruk asked.
“Dark Link is gonna get ya in your sleep,” Aryll taunted.
“Aryll,” Mipha started. “This isn't something to joke about.”
Aryll shrugged. “If we don't learn to laugh at how fucked up our lives are, we'll only go crazy.”
“What's Dark Link,” Revali asked, “and how do I get to kick his ass?”
“Look,” Zelda started fiercely. “I'm reinstating your titles of Champions. I hope you all enjoyed your vacation, because you're all about to go fight some more fucked up shit that wants to destroy us all.”
“I didn't reenlist,” Revali said. “I never signed on the dotted line.”
“We destroyed Ganondorf,” Urbosa said.
“ I destroyed Ganondorf,” Link muttered.
She ignored him. “What more could there possibly be?”
“The Yiga Clan,” Zelda said. “It seems they have plans to break the seal and give him possession of the Triforce.”
“I knew it,” Revali muttered. He turned to Link. “I called that, didn’t I?”
“We all know that won't work,” Daruk said. “You and Link have the other two pieces, and if he tries to get his hands on the whole thing, it will only shatter.”
“Well, fun fact, they found a way.”
The room was quiet for a moment more.
“So,” Revali said, breaking the silence. “Who's Dark Link?”
“I told you,” Aryll said. “Piss him off and you'll find out.” She wiggled her fingers once more.
Zelda continued before Aryll could say anything further. “The Yiga Clan believe that if the other two pieces – our pieces – are no longer pure, then Ganondorf will be able to wield the full power of the Triforce without it shattering.” Zelda hesitated, her gaze falling on Link. “Unfortunately, it seems that they've already worked their dark power into one of the pieces. They'll be after mine next.”
“Wait,” Daruk started. “How did that happen?”
“Link got himself kidnapped,” Aryll said. “They gave him some evil go-go juice, and voila, Dark Link.”
“I'm not evil,” Link muttered. He pinched the bridge of his nose.
“Not yet,” Aryll pointed out.
“The Yiga Clan apparently has a large supply of this-” Zelda sighed, “-evil go-go juice. They've used it to create an undead army, and they used it on Link to -”
“Turn him to the dark side,” Aryll finished.
Revali peered at Link. “He doesn't look dark or evil,” he said. “Nope, definitely still as much as a wuss as the day I met him.”
“Watch it,” Link snarled.
“Release the Kracken!”
“Knock it off, Aryll,” Mipha warned.
“When I turn, I'm going after you, first.” Link pressed a finger to his sister's nose, his lips twisted in an angry snarl.
“That's not funny!”
“Then shut the fuck up!”
Mipha pulled on Link's shirt, pulling him back into his seat where he fumed quietly.
“What is happening!” Riju shouted.
“Link gets super angry,” Aryll said. “And when he gets super angry, he turns into the hulk, except with these red, evil eyes, and he kills everything in his way.”
“Is this a joke?” Urbosa muttered.
“Mipha and I saw it ourselves.”
Urbosa stood abruptly and leaned across the table. Her fingers twisted in his shirt as she pulled Link forward. “Did you fucking touch them?” she hissed.
Link pulled himself out of her grip. “No!” He turned his gaze away quickly as he fell back into the chair. He dragged his palms down his face, but let them stay for a moment.
Urbosa turned her gaze to Mipha, who echoed his response. She remained standing, her hard gaze on Link. “So, you're telling us that you go all hulk and have no control over what you do?”
“Yup,” Aryll answered for him.
“And then what? You go back to normal after you rage kill everything?”
“Yup.”
“And eventually you'll turn on us?”
When Aryll did not answer for him, Link looked up and met Urbosa's gaze. “To the dark side,” he muttered. “And then you can kill me.”
Urbosa hesitated for a moment before returning to her seat.
“Wait a second,” Aryll said, standing suddenly. “We didn't agree to that. We said we'd fix this.”
“You're not even supposed to be here,” Link hissed.
“You lied to me!” She punched him in the shoulder. “You promised me we would fix it!”
“There's no we!” Link shouted at her. “You don't get a say!”
Aryll looked taken aback. “I don't get a say? I'm you're fucking sister! You're my brother! You're all I have left!”
Once more, the room fell silent. Link got to his feet and, without another word, left the room, slamming the door behind him. Aryll remained standing, her lips pinched together as the tears rolled down her cheeks. Mipha moved towards her, taking her hands and pulling her quickly out of the room.
“This is fucked up,” Revali muttered.
Daruk's brows knit together. “How long does he have?”
“I don't know,” Zelda admitted, her voice soft. “And I don't know how we can fix this. If he completely turns, we'll have no choice but to... there's no coming back if that happens.”
“What about the Yiga Clan?” Urbosa asked. “We’ll need to take them out, too.”
Zelda hesitated. “I think our prime objective will be to do what we can to fix Link,” she said slowly. “Otherwise, we won’t stand a chance against him and the Yiga.”
“We’ll need to do both,” Daruk said. “We need to be proactive in stopping the Yiga Clan before they can do any more damage.”
“Regardless,” Zelda said quickly. “We’ll need to be on guard. I’ll do what I can to find out more about the Yiga Clan, and how to fix Link before it’s too late.”
“So, what?” Revali started. “We’re supposed to just wait around until we have a plan? Why not make a plan now?”
“Zelda’s right,” Urbosa said. She held a careful gaze on the queen. “We need to be careful about how we deal with the Yiga Clan. We have the two people they need to get their hands on. The more details we have, the better off we’ll be.”
*****
Link paced the empty hallway, his mind racing, his heart aching for the pain he caused his sister. He cursed at himself over and over for letting everything happen to them. If only he had the sword – if only he had more power, like the rest of his friends – he could have stopped it. He could have saved them all. He could have stopped the Yiga Clan before they could even begin their evil plans. If only he were better.
He jumped when he felt a hand on his shoulder, turning to meet Teba's gaze. His brows knit together in confusion. “What are you doing here?”
“Zelda called me.”
“Why?”
He shrugged. “Dunno. Said she needed my help.”
Link snorted. “Your help?”
“I may not have any cool powers like you guys,” he said with a grin, “but that doesn't mean you guys get to have all the fun.”
“Remind me when the fun started?”
Teba ignored him. “I know the rumors, but what's your side?”
Link hesitated. “That depends. What are the rumors?”
“The best one I've heard is that you've gone crazy and betrayed us all. Hyrule's Hero turned traitor.”
“Oh, is that all?” Link sneered.
“Alright, alright,” Teba said. “Guess I hit a nerve.”
“Remind me why Zelda wants you?”
“Well,” he started, “I do command part of her army.”
“Since when?”
Teba shrugged. “Enlisting seemed like a good idea. Saki isn't too thrilled about it, though.”
“Right.” He hadn't realized how long it had been since he had seen Teba or Saki. He supposed he should act like a decent human being, at least for as long as he was human. “How is she?”
“She's good.”
Link could feel Teba's gaze on him, but he did not turn to him. “You should go get filled in, then.”
Teba patted Link's shoulder as he stepped around him and into the room. Link turned his attention to Mipha as she walked toward him.
“When did you become so cold and heartless?” Mipha hissed at him.
“I don’t know,” Link said. “Probably around the time Kohga decided to turn me into one of his fucking minions.”
Mipha pulled her gaze away from him. “Aryll left.”
Link’s hard gaze softened. “Where did she go?”
“I don’t know.”
“And you let her go?”
“She doesn’t need to be here.” She glanced at him. “And she certainly doesn’t need to deal with your shit.”
Link averted her gaze. His brows furrowed. “She needs to face the reality of the situation,” he said firmly.
“What? That her brother is just going to let this happen? Let himself die?” Her voice raised. “You’re all she has left!” Her voice broke toward the end, and when she spoke again, it was softer. “You can’t… you can’t do that to her. You can’t do that to me.”
“I’m not going to let it happen,” he said slowly. “But if we can’t fix this soon… Goddesses, Mipha, it’s not like I wanted this!” His jaw tightened. “But I can’t let myself live if I’m only going to put everyone in danger. The same danger I did everything I could to stop. The same danger my father died trying to stop.” He met her gaze. “You both need to understand that. This is what needs to be done.”
“Well,” Mipha started softly. “If it comes down to that, we can deal with it then. But Aryll needs you. I need you. We need you here, and now. You need to fight for your damn life.”
“To the end.”
“We won’t let it come to that. I won’t let it come to that.”
Link pressed his lips together. He needed to find his sister. He fished his keys out of his pocket, then pressed his lips against Mipha’s before jogging down the hall and outside to find Aryll.
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okay SO my semi-detailed thoughts on all of the BotW dungeons are below the cut. Overall, they were pretty fun! there were admittedly a few annoyances here and there, but they didn’t detract too much from my experience.
Vah Ruta was really cool (outside and inside), especially once I realized how the water and trunk movement played into the later terminals. Waterblight was by far the easiest of the Divine Beast boss fights. I barely remember anything about either phase because I got two Flurry Rushes in Phase 1 and it spent most of Phase 2 stunned.
Van Rudania was frustrating, especially the Malice-covered terminal outside (because at that point I had noticed that the maws were connected to the eyes, but it hadn’t really clicked) and the wall of fire. plus the carried-over frustration of Death Mountain setting you on fire w/o potions or gear. Then again, I was playing at 2 AM. Fireblight was harder than Waterblight, but once I figured out his transition attack in Phase 2 (and broke an Ancient Shield, ouch), it wasn't too bad. (Also, I learned afterward that his fireball works like the Rock Octoroc one? You just yeet a bomb at him and blow him up? really? that’ll make my second run through so much easier...)
Vah Naboris was the most fun of the Divine Beasts I've done so far, both inside and out, but especially the electricity/rotation puzzles. Plus the prerequisite Yiga Clan stuff was fun, even though I failed both stealth sections. (Side note: the blademasters one-shot kill you? apparently? I just ran away any time they got close and fired multi-shot bomb arrows when they were all grouped up. I thought the most danger I was in was from the Duplex Bow guys, and they died to one bomb arrow volley. huh) Thunderblight was a pain in the ass, mainly because I underestimated its speed and especially its range. and how annoying being electrocuted was. Fortunately, multi-shot bomb arrows were once again my friend.
Vah Medoh wasn't the most memorable, but it was still fun, especially with how much it used wind and the paraglider. I can't say the "activate the terminals" part was too memorable, but destroying the cannons with Teba was pretty fun! Windblight was surprising. It was a lot heavier on the bow side of combat than I was expecting, but that's not a bad thing! After figuring that (and the Phase 2 mechanic) out, the fight went pretty smoothly.
Fighting through Hyrule Castle was awesome! I loved the music, I loved the thrill and danger of *Guardians and turrets everywhere!* I ended up getting the Hylian Shield by complete luck, and I learned that Urbosa's Fury is SUPER powerful! (if I’m not mistaken, isn’t it the only thing that can stun a Lynel?) Plus, I got the last of the memories, meaning I got extra lore stuff! Ganon was... much easier than I expected. Firstly, I'd never watched a playthrough of the game that wasn't a straight-to-castle speedrun, so I thought I'd have to refight all the Blights. Nope, straight to Ganon! And then, in the fight itself, not only did he mostly use the beam attack - which meant free damage for me - he landed exactly one hit on me (with the giant fire weapon). It didn't even do 10 damage (half my base health before food). I've fought White-Maned Lynels that were tougher to beat, because they actually killed me! That's not knocking the fight too much, it was still kinda fun (especially Dark Beast), but it was also disappointing in a way.
Anyway yeah! I’ve finished Breath of the Wild! and now I’m playing through it again on a second profile because I want to finish all the quests and going back to do them on my main game is way too daunting
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