Not a normal art post but my first session is this Monday so I made a quick pngtuber of my dmsona!

Doodlys tonite

the more i read about cozy horror the more i understand why people fucking hate the idea of this being considered a “genre”

you know im realizing now. with the exception of a few resident psychiatrists, ive had like. no good experiences with mental health professionals

bro i’m so sick of being mentally ill like this shit is so annoying bc why i am literally incapable of passing 4 courses in one semester. and mind you i have pretty much no social life and did one extracurricular this semester and exactly zero last year. what do you mean my friends go to parties on weekends and have jobs on campus and also hobbies and free time?

I’m seeing my favourite band next year wtaf

God nothing hits like early bleach, the substitute shinigami arc and rukia’s execution arc are just. Ugh. Something about the crunchy-ass early 2000s-ness of it that the rest of the series lost (not just animation wise but aesthetic wise), when there was still hope that all the potential would be capitalized on, idk, it was just fun and getting to fall in love with all the characters because pretty much every single one introduced was great and engaging. I just really really wish the series had kept that early vibe that it started losing once the visoreds were introduced, they got the last little tail end of it. As soon as we got to the heuco mundo arc this all vanished and it’s so upsetting, the series just lost a lot of its personality, if that makes sense, I wish it had kept it so badly

marvel movies are always: here’s a white dude superhero that’s literally just a male power fantasy. he’s super strong and he’s wearing a very boring spandex suit to show off his muscles. it’s all cgi btw. he has a best friend who is funny but also not as hot or strong as he is and said friend is always telling him how cool and strong and amazing he is. because he’s already perfect he will have no character development but he is allowed to get stronger.

okay now here’s his love interest. get this: she’s hot and under 120 lbs and she’s white or light skinned and has long straight hair and she wears make up (but not TOO much make up) and dresses but TRUST US, she’s not like the other girls. her main character trait is that she is easy to kidnap and needs to be rescued a lot. she will not have any back story or character development because she is hot and pretty so she doesn’t need it. all of her scenes will be cgi btw. she won’t be in any fight scenes but we’re gonna cgi everything anyways.

last but not least here’s the bad guy. something traumatic happened to his wife or daughter or whatever and that made him evil somehow. we’ll introduce some random side character to explain that. it’s gonna be a 3 sentence scene and then the bad guy will kill him because he is bad. he wants to kill everyone because he’s soooo evil and he kidnaps the love interest and scares her a lot but ultimately doesn’t actually harm her. his entire body is cgi btw.

okay so get this. the bad guy and the hero fight and a car gets thrown multiple times and explodes. then there’s lots of hand to hand combat scenes. sometimes people go flying. it’s all cgi btw. sometimes we will have stunt doubles for the hand to hand combat scenes but it’s still gonna be completely cgi.

for the plot the hero gets beat up by the bad guy but then he gets stronger and at the end he beats the bad guy up. hot girl is so impressed she falls in love with him instantly and then he says some one liner and she responds with a second one liner and then they kiss (no tongue for 20 seconds). then everyone else claps and the president comes down and is like “wow you’re so powerful and strong and you beat up the bad guy. do you want to be a soldier cop and join this hero club we started so we can make a second movie?” and then the hero says yes and delivers a witty one liner. btw the entire scene is cgi including the president. all of the outfits are also cgi to make them look like they got a little dirty and damaged after the fight.

the credits will roll and then after the end of them we will add in a scene where there is a new bad guy and the old bad guy is actually still alive. and then another strong cool hero guy will be there to set up the sequel. it’s all cgi btw including the second guy. we actually just took a clip from a different movie and put it in but we used cgi so it looked different.

it’s literally the exact same thing every single fucking time. the only thing they change is the actors. even the fucking fight scenes are boring and the exact same for every fucking movie. they aren’t interesting or funny or cool and i’m saying that as someone who LOVES watching fight scenes and action and gratuitous violence. everyone eats that shit up because disney made it so they don’t care if it’s good or not and then they advertise it so obsessively you are literally forced to constantly hear about it whether you want to or not. at a fucking JOB INTERVIEW one of the questions was “what marvel superhero would you like to be and why?” and if you say “idk cause those movies suck shit” you’re seen as not a team player, someone who doesn’t know how to have fun or participate in fun things.

fuck disney and fuck marvel and fuck corporate america. fuck trends and fuck societal expectation to participate in them or face ridicule and judgement that has real life consequences.

loses my mind that they’ve known each other for over a year at that point (even if first four months was just bumping into each other at her work or around the city a bunch) but like um [redacted] was fascinated by her right away… which quickly turned into a weird obsession of wanting to figure her out… and he still hasn’t admitted mayhaps he had caught feelings a bit too quickly… hence the not date definitely dates… whereas diana like definitely started trusting him (in certain aspects) and kinda i guess maybe considered him something of a friend (which she didn’t know she needed) and recently she came to the realisation that somewhere along the line she caught feelings….

Update on my mental health testing I’ve been doing since I finally got my diagnosis. I was not diagnosed with adhd or ocd like I thought I’d be. Apparently there is a disorder for inattentiveness due to screen time that I’m diagnosed with but was told that doesn’t cover all of my issues. And then I was told that I’d need some more testing to prove this but the psychologist testing me thinks that I just have too high of an iq and am simply bored. Catch me making a list of symptoms now both good and bad

every day i log into this site and ponder whether or not im going to write a long mildly over sharing post about the intricacies of grief and death