#why are time machines not invented yet
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I often look back and wonder if I should have started meds in the first place all those years ago, for all the trouble they are giving me now. (My illness is almost 100% iatrogenic). In the end, I probably did not need meds — I needed someone with experience to hold my hand, coach me through my days, and tell me that all would be alright, that I’d make it through my education and my training, that I was capable and that things were not scary as I imagined them to be.
Mr. Nisile: In other words, you needed your future self? I don’t think you would have trusted anyone else.
#illness#mental health#adulting#why are time machines not invented yet#ssri withdrawal#fragrance speaks
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maybe its 5 am and im stoned but i wish that there was more of a conversation about abusive friendships, people talk a lot about abusive relationships and thats important but like, 10 years of having an abusive best friend really permanently altered my ability to trust or relate to people and it took years for me to realize or admit to myself that it was abusive and like, maybe people should talk about that more, maybe if we talked about it more it would happen less, because no one deserves going through that, and i dont know if im ever gonna be normal about people again after that and that really sucks
#this is not about or prompted by anyone on this website i just cant talk about her unless its late and im stoned#every time something happens with HFL and im like wow this is really shitty i remember#that it has been so so much worse and at least HFL hasnt like permanently broken a part of me so#like she took parts of me and broke them and they can never be fixed or replaced and im tired of thinking about it#why havent we invented the eternal sunshine machine yet i dont want to remember any of this
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Power of the Sun
Summary: You're Doc O'Hara's assistant
A/N: tentacle pron?
Art: vencipality on twt
Miguel x Reader, No warnings, a little violent/screaming, Angst?, Word Count: 3,004
Miguel was a man of science. He took pride in his work but was always humble about it. He was a kind mentor, encouraging young brilliant minds to pursue their passion in science and math, connecting with his peers and exchanging ideas to enrich and evolve humankind for the greater good.
Knowledge is not a privilege, it’s a gift, he would say.
Like any other one of his colleagues and apprentices, you admired him and his work. You followed him around as his assistant and confidant. Miguel trusted you after many years and you had fallen in love with him after many years.
For a while, it had remained one-sided. A love you kept to yourself and didn’t believe that a man so brilliant as him would ever fall for someone like his subordinate. He deserved someone equally as knowledgeable–capable of keeping up with him.
“Dr. O’Hara, I’ve printed all the documents of the latest experimentation process as well as sending a copy to Osborn.” You walked in his vast lab, heels clicking with each step against the marbled floor.
Miguel was all the way in the back, only a dim fluorescent light highlighting him and whatever he was working on. His face was scrunched together as he focused on the task at hand. However when he heard your voice, he looked over his shoulder and his scowl melted. He called out your name gently, now a small smile on his face.
He joined you in the middle, hands out as he collected the papers from your hands. He briefly flipped through the pages, scanning with his eyes before looking back up at you. He patted the front pages with the back of his hand and nudged his glasses up further his nose.
“What would I do without you?”
You flush, scoffing and looking to the side before reverting back to him. “You’d be fine, Dr.O’Hara.” You shake your head and swerve around him to take a look at whatever he was working on.
Miguel turns. “I beg to differ. For years, you’ve been a great asset at my side.”
You hum. “And for years, you keep telling me that. But really, Doctor, it’s you who does the actual revolutionary actions.”
He meets you at your side once he’s placed the papers securely somewhere. “Miguel.” He corrects you. “We’ve been together all this time. You know what else I keep telling you? That honorifics is unnecessary. Call me Miguel.”
You clear your throat. “Okay, Miguel.” No matter how many times he reminded you, you would always say his name before reverting back to calling him Doctor. Perhaps habits are hard to break.
“How’s it coming along?” You turn your head to see what he had been working on for a long time now.
Miguel brightened up, standing straight and walking around the device. Four long green mechanical tentacles held up on their own all attached to a long spinal machine. He grazed his hands over the tentacles, admiring his own work.
“We’re close, darling. It just needs some testing.”
“Well if you’d like I could set up a volunteering headline for–”
“No, no, no!” He stopped you by shaking his head and hands. “No, I–we can’t let this get out to the public yet. This is for the expo next month where Osborn will be. Perhaps he can finally understand why I’m doing this…” He mumbles to himself.
You’re taken aback by his outburst but you rationalize it by thinking how exhausted he might be. Ever since Norman Osborn had disregarded Miguel’s research, Miguel had been working on crunch time to prove the CEO wrong.
“Then how will you test it?” Your hand comes up to hold a claw from one of the tentacles. You examine the carbon fiber skeleton that Miguel used, trying to find the details of the prosthetic.
Miguel admires you from the side, his eyes longing and far as he watches.
“I’ll–” He sighs. “I’ll think of…someone.” He murmurs. He feels an ache in his chest and looks back at his invention. The green of the arms glow softly against his brown skin, reflecting off his glasses. He looks over at you and sees the same for you. The curve of your cheeks and the light in your eyes tinged with green.
“You know, um. It’s been a while since we’ve-eh- hung out?” Miguel stammers, taking off his glasses and cleans the right lens with his lab coat. “Maybe later tonight we could–if you like, of course– to join me for dinner?” He coughs and quickly places his glasses back on to hide his blush. He fails.
You turn your head to face him, surprise evident on your face. “O-oh. As…colleagues?” Your voice pitches higher with nerves.
Miguel gulps, Adam's apple bobbing with the action. “Well, no–it’s–what I’m trying to say is I’d like to have dinner with you as…more than colleagues.” Miguel burns brighter. He could solve the hardest equation, understand quantum physics and talk to scholars and billionaires with no sweat but when it came to you, you turned him into a babbling idiot. He glances at you from his peripheral vision, hoping you would not reject him.
“Oh..! Then,” You give him a small smile. “I’d love to.”
What started as one date, began another and another until a series of dates had been planned and enjoyed before it blossomed into a relationship with your boss. You never thought it possible. You always thought of Miguel as someone out of your reach, someone who would rather focus on winning awards and gaining money–helping humankind–before ever thinking of settling down with anyone.
For months, you had been going out with him, and establishing your relationship and for months you were helping him with his invention.
Miguel screamed as he threw everything he had on his desk aside in anger. Pens, papers and other tools flew to the floor and he gripped his hair in frustration. He tugged on his long curls hoping that the pain in his strands would outweigh the pounding in his head. You ran to his side and placed a hand on his back while he curled into himself, heaving heavily.
“You need to rest.” You urged.
“These damn billionaires,” He growls, ignoring you. “Can’t they see we’re just trying to help people? Can’t they see beyond something as worthless as the money they want?” He stomps away from you, heading to the pinboard that held all his drawings and calculations. He ripped them off their pins and clips, tearing them to shreds as they fluttered to the floor.
“This is the next step to human evolution! And they want to dump my shit, my life’s WORK, just because of what?” He laughs hysterically. “Because that malparido Osborn doesn’t believe in it? Are they so far up that elitists ass?”
You watch terrified behind him. You feel your heart pumping, your eyes trained on him in case he hurts himself. “Miguel…”
He slams his fists on the now bare pinboard, papers strewn across the floor around him. He heaves out another sigh, his anger simmering. “I just want to help people.” He whispers, resting his forehead on the rough surface.
While he takes in shaky breaths, you decide to approach him. Placing your hand on his shoulder, you turn his head towards you. Your heart breaks when you see the defeated look on his face. Eyebags had grown deeper, his eyes bloodshot and half lidded from sleep deprivation.
“It’s okay.” You whisper.
“It’s not.”
“It is. You’re a smart man, Miguel. You’ve done unimaginable things on your own. Your mind is what they need, but you? You don’t need their money. You have that brain of yours.” You tap his forehead and give him an encouraging grin.
Miguel’s face falls into a relaxed smile, chuckling when you tap his forehead. “And you.” He whispers. “I have you.” He takes your hand off his shoulder and brings your knuckles up to his lips to kiss them. He keeps your hand against him until he breathes in and out slowly, looking up at you.
“Thank you.” He mumbles, kissing your hand again before standing straight and moving his arms around your waist. “What would I do without you?” He grins tiredly.
Your arms snake around his neck. “Probably die without me.” You giggled and he giggled with you.
“Probably.” He hums while you look at each other, basking in the calm after the storm of emotions.
“How about I bring us some tea?” You offer.
“No coffee?”
“I think caffeine should be the least of your worries right now.” You roll your eyes playfully when you see his smirk. “English Breakfast?” You pat his chest before sliding away from his embrace, looking over your shoulder as you walk towards the exit.
Miguel smiles and nods. “You know me so well.” He sighs and stuffs his hands in his pockets after watching you leave. His smile drops from his face and he looks over at the giant green robotic tentacles. With a gentle hand, he caresses the silicon with care. Then, he moves onto the spinal cord of the device, wondering if Osborn just saw what he could do–then it would all be worth it. With a glance at the door, he makes sure the coast is clear before taking off his lab coat and shirt–and attaches the tentacles to his body.
You loved Miguel, honestly. The man you met was the sweetest. He was kind and caring, always patient and encouraging for new minds that wanted to learn. He was gentle. Was.
You wondered where it all went wrong. Maybe you should’ve seen the signs.
It seemed like everyday he would get slowly more agitated. Not at you. Never at you. More like, at the situation–at least you’d tell yourself that.
You remember waking up one day in Miguel’s apartment. With your growing relationship, you decided to move in with him but it seemed like you were alone again. Miguel was sleeping at the lab more often than not. Other times you would have had to drag him out of his burrow, him snapping with red eyes that he needed to continue working.
With a sigh, you shuffled out of bed, the other side being freezing cold, and got ready for work.
After clocking in, you found Miguel exactly where he was last night—hunched over and murmuring to himself. You place the tea you brought down onto the table along with a sleeping pill right next to him.
“Mi amor, you need to get some actual rest. It’s been days. You’ll wear yourself out.” You speak as quietly as possible to not scare him. Miguel doesn’t flinch, only shrugging you off.
“I’m almost done.” He grumbles.
“You’ve been saying that for weeks now.” You frown deeply and nudge the tea closer to him. “At this rate everything will be in vain. It won’t work if—“
“IT WILL WORK!” Miguel screams, slamming his fist onto the table enough to shake the cup of tea's contents, spilling the sleeping pill. “It has to!”
You jump back, heart racing at his outburst.
Miguel huffs and collects himself, anxiously running his hands through his hair. He drags his hands down his face and rubs his eyes.
“Sorry, shock, I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean to yell at you. You're right—it’s the, uh, lack of sleep.” He sounds exhausted. Every word slurring and when he relaxed even for a moment, his body drooped forward.
“You know better than to do that…” You whisper and he looks up at you with heartbreak in his eyes.
“I…I know, mi cielo—pero—“ Miguel gives you a weak smile, some light coming back to his eyes. “Look. Look! The—the arms! They’re almost complete!” He rushes towards you, ignorant to the way you step back and flinch when he takes your hand in his.
Miguel leads you to where the tentacles stand and presents it to you with a wide smile.
“You see here?” He points to the spinal cord of the contraption. “All these ridges really gave me a run for my money. When trying to attach it to the body, they would stick and often fall. If these are to be used for prosthetics then it needs to not just be connected to the body but a part of it. As if the limb never left—or-or better—made better.” He laughs to himself, placing a hand over his mouth as he stares adoringly at the machine.
Meanwhile your eyes squint. “How…how would you know that? How would you know how they react to connecting to the human body? I thought…this was unstable for human testing.”
Miguel scoffs, waving his hand at you. “No one gets far in their inventions by worrying about the dangers, mija! THINK!” He shouts.
You’re horrified, darting your eyes between his bloodshot eyes and the tentacles. “You didn’t…”
Miguel is already on his way to the device and stands in front of it. The spine digs into Miguel’s back and he grunts, the vest he added secures around his waist, lighting up a soft green. The chip snaps into his neck and Miguel stumbles but regains balance. He slowly stands back up and the tentacles come to life, swirling and curling around him. In the midst of the tentacles wiggling around, it slammed against tables and chairs—knocking the tea you had gotten him to the floor.
“Think about how many lives we could save. Mi amor, mi vida, mi corazón, we’re at the brink of the next stage of human evolution!” His tentacles whip wildly around him as if cheering along with him.
“What…are you talking about?!” You yell, exasperated. “‘Human evolution’? Are you insane?!”
The bottom two green arms slam into the ground, breaking the floor as it’s crushed under the weight of Miguel. They lift him higher so he’s well above you—more than he already is. You take a step back, his height and strength becoming much more prominent.
“Do you think I’m insane, corazón?” Miguel asks softly. There’s a hint of green in his eyes.
“We’re—“ You gasp. “We’re meant to make prosthetics. Legs, arms—I thought this was a test to the future but this…” You run your eyes down the arms of the green silicon. Its claws are digging firm into the ground, holding up a six foot nine man’s weight with ease. Miguel’s face is contorted in a scowl, a burning rage underneath his beautiful brown eyes—a light green glowing in the highlights.
“This…is not you…”
“What would you know about me?! You’re just some assistant that doesn’t know jackshit other than printing a few papers! All while I worked on this myself!” One of his upper tentacles slam next to you which makes you jump and lose your balance so you could fall to the ground.
“Day and night, all you did was be some aching headache, forcing me tea and pills when I should be wringing Osborn’s neck with my bare hands to show him what exactly he missed out on!” Miguel cackles, his tentacles lifting him higher like a God.
You’re afraid. Very afraid. It all happened so fast. Who was this man?
The tears well up in your eyes and for a minute—if you said another word it would trigger Miguel to kill you.
Miguel must’ve seen the terror on your face, tears bubbling at your water line and falling down your cheeks while you shivered. He must’ve because his sinister smile dropped slowly, his arms lowering him down.
“No, no, no—bella—no. That’s—it wasn’t me—“ Miguel’s feet finally touch the ground and when he does, he hisses, gripping his head as an agonizing headache surges through his mind. He groaned and moaned and took several steps back away from you.
“No! Don’t make her look at me like that! She’s afraid! Don’t scare her! Don’t make her fear me!” He screams, hyperventilating as his legs shake beneath him.
“What? No! I want Osborn! Not her! She didn’t do anything! Leave her alone! Please!” Miguel’s releases tears, giant globs flowing down his face as he faces an internal battle and the tentacles go haywire.
Finding your chance, you shakily get up from the floor, scrambling to your feet to the exit. You scream and fall after just a few steps, Miguel’s tentacles zipping past your head to break through the wall by the door. Another worker outside screams, peering through the hole and witnessing Miguel looking down at you with fury. They run off and it creates a domino effect for an evacuation.
“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” Miguel growls and hovers closer to your shaking body. You turn over your shoulder, heart hammering in your ears and chest. You feel like you can’t breathe.
“Miggy…” You whimper. Miguel’s eye twitches and he looks like he’s struggling between himself and whatever it is that’s in his head.
He stutters your name out before his face is webbed and he groans. Four separate webs wrap around Miguel’s tentacles to attach to his body. Miguel glares up and sees a familiar red and blue suit with big white eyes.
“Don’tcha know it’s rude to be mean to a pretty lady?” The hero quips, standing front of you to protect you.
“Spider-Man…” You gasp—relief filling your chest.
“Spider-Man.” Miguel growls and rips himself free from the webs only to be hindered again once more—this time with stronger webs and with a force strong enough to stick him to a wall.
“Nope! Not yet! I’m still trying to figure out what exactly you are, so give me like five minutes to save some civilians. Thanks, you’re a swell guy!” Spider-Man winks and picks you up in his arms and quickly swings you away to safety.
You look over Spider-Man's shoulder while he swings away and you could barely hear Miguel scream in frustration, his body fighting against the webs. Inside, your heart breaks as you wonder if maybe there was a chance to save him.
A/N: i dont see doc ock miggys. i would like to see more.
#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o'hara x y/n#miguel x reader#miguel o'hara x you#atsv miguel#spiderman 2099#miguel spiderverse#miguel o'hara#miguel spiderman#miguel ohara#atsv x reader#atsv x y/n#miguel o'hara imagine
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I'm a big apologist of Aziraphale/Wilde for jealous Crowley reasons and I do wish there were more fanfics about the topic. Or even not about Wilde, just the men in the gentleman's club. Crowley was supposedly asleep at the time but he is clever, he would figure it out somehow (memorabilia Aziraphale keeps in the bookshop, for example) but I don't think he would really bring it up. He would be jealous in silence.
On the other hand, I'm also an apologist of Crowley/Da Vinci. It's not everyone that has a bloody sketch of the Mona Lisa with the message "For my friend, Antonio" or something along those lines (I think it was written in Italian? I can't remember anymore). And Crowley has kept it in pristine condition for centuries!
By now, everyone knows Leo was queer, yes? Fantastic.
Crowley is attracted to art like music and statues, but you know what else? Engineering! Because he used to be a Star-Maker, and what was Leo besides an amazing artist? An engineer! Do you really think Crowley wouldn't be attracted as hell by his inventions? Especially the flying machine?
Now, with the idea that they knew each other and probably spent a lot of time together in the workshop and drinking and what not...well, have you looked at Crowley? He's gorgeous! And artists are attracted to pretty things. My headcanon is that Leo painted Crowley at least once.
Now, a good story would be if the painting was lost in time and eventually found and it made a tour through the best museums and made a stop in London, eventually.
Aziraphale would be excited, Crowley would be curious, and they would go together.
When they arrive in front of the painting Crowley goes very still and Aziraphale gasps.
"But! But that's you!"
"Mhnn eh how would I know? Plenty of red heads back then in Italy, I assure you."
Aziraphale points at the picture.
"I would recognize that face anywhere, Crowley!"
"Aw, angel, would you? What a flatterer."
"That's not the point! This painting...this painting is gorgeous. But aren't you a bit too...au naturel?"
"Agh, eh, I mean. Plenty of semi nude paintings to go around from that era."
"Yes, but in that case the artist and the muse were quite close." Gasp. "Anthony J Crowley, you had a...a thing with Leonardo Da Vinci?! While I was in Spain?!"
"Ngk. I wouldn't call it a thing. More like...a tiny thing."
So yeah, while Crowley is jealous on the inside, Aziraphale (especially if they were already in a relationship) would be very obvious about it and very vocal. Even petty if we want to go down that route.
"Please, angel, you've been avoiding me for 2 days."
"I refused to be kissed with the same lips that kissed Da Vinci."
"Oh yeah? What about your 'friend' Oscar Wilde?!"
Aziraphale gasps and blushes.
"Why the hell would you bring Wilde into this conversation?!"
Crowley steps closer.
"I know exactly what you did with him back in the 1800s. And yet I never complained did I?"
"...since when?"
"The 40s."
"And you never told me you knew?!"
"Because I don't care! I mean, I do, it hurt a little. A lot. But I got over it. That was a century ago, Aziraphale. And I have you now, don't I? I won in the end."
Sorry, I easily get sidetracked. My point is: more Crowley/Da Vinci fanfic or even art are needed.
#good omens#crowley#aziraphale#ineffable husbands#aziracrow#david tennant#anthony j crowley#michael sheen
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capture the flag - leo valdez
Request: nope
Pairing: leo valdez x apollo!reader
Summary: during capture the flag, no one gets stuck in leo's traps and he wants to find out why
Warnings: none
Word count: 800
A/N: this has been sitting in my drafts for a while and now that I'm back in my pjo era time to finish it! enjoy :)
capture the flag is always fun. it's a nice way for people to train together while it feels like a game. even though sometimes people get too competitive.
it gives leo the chance to litter the forest with traps, and to test new inventions. of course, he could test them in the bunker or on his friends. but this is the real deal. no one knows where the traps are, how many there are. it's the perfect conditions to test them.
he's made a new batch of them but for some reason none of the traps work.
whenever he goes to check on them, they're all disabled. no one's activated them, or he would have found a fellow camper near one.
and leo is absolutely sure he activated them. they didn't blow up so there's nothing wrong with them.
and yet they're disabled.
rather than trying to capture the flag, he decides to hide in the bushes near one of his traps to see what - or who - is disabling them.
he listens to the sounds of the woods around him and pulls stuff out of his tool bel two mindlessly build little machines.
after a while, he spots movement out of the corner of his eye.
whoever it is moves quietly and gracefully. so definitely not an ares kid, leo concludes.
the person slowly walks over to leo's trap, careful where they put their feet down on the forrest floor.
leo watches as they walk around the trap, examining it. he shifts to get a better look at who it is.
he frowns slightly. he would have expected someone from the hermes cabin. maybe piper because he's spent a lot of time trying to explain his machines to her.
but he didn't expect it to be a daughter of apollo.
to be fair, leo thought the apollo cabin didn't know anything about traps or machines in general. their skills were mostly archery, medicine and music. not traps built by a hephaestus kid.
leo's eyes follow your hand movements as you carefully prod around the trap. surely you wouldn't be able to- and you disabled it.
smiling to yourself, you straighten your back and us your foot to slide the now useless trap aside.
when you turn around, you hear leaves rustle behind you.
instinctively, you knock an arrow on your bow and turn on your heel.
you are met by leo, who is frantically waving his hands in front of his face.
'don't shoot, don't shoot! I come in peace!' he yells.
you lower your bow. 'leo! gods, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you!'
'that's alright.' says leo, lowering his hands. 'I was the one hiding behind you.'
you frown. 'why were you hiding anyway? usually you like to be in the middle of the action.' you say.
'can't help the fact people start fighting over me wherever I go.' says leo, making you chuckle.
'yeah, right, valdez. as if anyone could come near you with the amount of traps you're setting.' you say.
'speaking of which.' says leo, walking over to his trap and picking it up to examine it. 'how did you know where the kill switch was on this?'
you shrug. 'that's a tactical secret I can't reveal.' you say. 'for future capture the flag purposes.'
'or you just got lucky.'
'23 times?'
'yeah, that seems unlikely.'
you smile. 'there's a window in the roof of bunker nine.' you say. 'it's actually a two way mirror. it doesn't let any light through. gives me a perfect view of your workspace, though.'
'so the tactical secret is spying.' says leo.
'can't win if you don't play a little dirty every now and then. plus it's cool to see all the stuff you create.'
you shoulder your bow. 'good luck activating all of the traps again.' you say. 'I need to get back to my cabin.'
you start to walk toward the noise your fellow campers are making, to see if your team is winning and how you can help.
'hey!'
you turn around to see leo is still standing in the clearing with the trap in his hands.
'if you want to, I could show you how to make these? then you will be able to do more than just disable them.' he says.
you smile at him, you've always liked leo.
but you are surprised, you know leo is kind of protective of bunker 9 and usually only Hephaestus kids go inside. it must be a huge deal for someone from another cabin to be invited into the bunker.
and Leo wants you here.
'sure.' you say. 'I'd like that. but first we have to steal your flag.'
'oh no, you won't.' says leo.
with one last smile, you disappear into the woods, leaving leo to reactivate his trap before coming after you.
A/N:
If you want to request something, make sure to read my house rulesHere’s the list of characters I write for. Everything that I have written can be found on my masterlist.
Please don’t repost my work, as I spend much time and effort on it!! Thank you for reading!
Much love,
Marit/Max
#first time writing for leo <3#pjo#pjo fic#pjo fics#pjo fanfic#pjo fanfiction#pjo fanfics#pjo oneshot#pjo oneshots#percy jackson#Percy Jackson fanfiction#Percy Jackson fanfics#Percy Jackson fanfic#Percy Jackson fanfictions#Percy Jackson fic#Percy Jackson fics#Percy Jackson oneshot#Percy Jackson oneshots#Leo valdez#Leo valdez x reader#Leo valdez fanfiction#Leo valdez fanfic#Leo valdez fanfics#Leo valdez fic#Leo valdez fics#Leo valdez x apollo!reader#Leo valdez oneshot#Leo valdez oneshots
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The third man theory
Note: This theory takes as starting point Aurora's Fun theory. It states that the invention in which Gaster fell was a new version of a warp door that would have allowed the monsters of the underground to escape to a timeline in which the war against the humans never happened. If this experiment were to work, it would have allowed for a happier ending than the True Pacifist one, because more accidents and deaths would have been prevented.
Sadly, Gaster's experiments went wrong and he was scattered "across time and space". The only other time in Undertale this expression is used is when we call Papyrus in Sans's room, the one that gets us lost in a seemingly endless darkness when we enter it, with a door that suspiciously looks like Mystery Man's grey door and Deltarune's warp doors. This key expression used by Papyrus tells us Gaster's creation and untimely demise should have something to do with these doors.
If this theory is correct, the invention in which Gaster fell would have been under our nose the whole time.
With the FUN theory video in mind, something about Mr. Elegance's dialogues caught my eye.
Evidence 1 - Mr. Elegance, if we didn't previously talk to Jigsaw Joe:
Evidence 2 - Mr. Elegance if we previously talked to Jigsaw Joe:
For a flaming teleportation door one would assume to be magical, the vocabulary used to talk about it sure sounds mechanical and mundanely machine-like : « Fix up », « working on it », « got this door workin’ », « it might break », « fixed that door », « it should work without any issues ». Intriguingly, it looks old, and yet, it is new to the Darkners, who have never seen it before. Is it really Darkner technology?
Of course, to an experienced Undertale player, it looks familiar, similar to the one to Sans's room.
This brings us to my question: Why did Toby Fox add these two different Mr. Elegance dialogues about this door? What purpose do they serve?
It can't be to alert the player that they could malfunction if we haven’t previously talked to Jigsaw Joe, since they always work properly regardless. It’s not like this triggers a side quest asking you to talk to the puzzle man if you don't want a 1/6 chance of the door teleporting you into the void. And they don't serve a comedic purpose either. There is no joke, no punchline. So why warn us about the breaking hazard, if the warp doors never break in the first place ? Why specify that 3 people are needed to get them to work smoothly?
Because this isn’t really about the Scarlet Forest shortcut. The door might not break in the game, but it might have broken somewhere else. This is really about what went wrong with Gaster's experiments.
Time to bring in evidence 3:
First, let's note that this tweet isn't exactly talking about the same situation as in evidence 1 : Mr. Elegance talks about a door that two people got to work and that might break, while Toby Fox talks about a machine that's already broken and that two people could never repair.
However, evidence 2 tells us that when three of them worked on it, the machine should work without a problem. So if we assume that these dialogues are really about the creation that led to Gaster’s demise, this means that the reason things went wrong is because one person was missing.
Two people worked on the machine instead of three, which led to Gaster's disappearance. Yet, we know that two people were trying to repair the machine once it was broken. This means that after Gaster's disappearance, the missing person came back.
Now let's imagine that Gaster formed a trio with two other colleagues that we'll name X and Y. The Royal Scientist is working on a door-shaped machine that would free the monsters from their imprisonment. As the fate of the Underground lies in his hands, a lot of pressure is resting upon his shoulders. The role that X and Y had in this creation is unknown. Gaster could have even built it on his own. But thanks to Entry n°17, we know that shared his experiments with two other people. And thanks to the Japanese translation, we know he was rather close to them.
After the construction of the machine, Gaster and X try to get it to work, but without Y. Maybe they walked away from the experiment, maybe the other two didn't trust them enough, we don't know.
Despite this, they manage to make it work with just the two of them. However, what Mr. Elegance predicts happens, and something goes wrong. Two people just wasn't enough to assure that the machine would work properly. It's too unstable. It malfunctions. Gaster falls inside, is shattered across time and space, and the machine breaks.
Now let's come back to the end of Toby Fox's tweet. ”Neither of them could fix the machine, no matter how hard they tried. No one can." Notice that "neither of them" means precisely two people.
After the incident, Y comes back, but Gaster disappeared. The trio is now a duo. Y and X do everything they can to repair the machine, but can't. No one can. Because Gaster, the person necessary to its reparation, is no more.
If this theory is right, what are X and Y’s identities? And why was Y absent during the creation of the shortcut door machine? A lot of questions have yet to be answered...
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I suck ass at requesting 😍 how about X treating reader like a lover before they are even a couple yet but reader is to dense to realize
and when regulus meets X and reader she just goes “oh yeah thats your s/o right?”
Omg I yelled when I read this. Literally, my roommates started giving me weird looks. THIS IS SUCH A GOOD IDEA!!
Also please tell me if it's ooc 😭 I tried
Best friends. That's what you thought when X would hug you from behind. Or kiss your cheek. Or do any other romantic activity.
While you were under the impression that he was just being your overly affectionate best friend, he didn't think the same way.
He wondered why none of his hints worked. Why was nothing working? Maybe it was you...no it couldn't be you. It had to be his fault for not making it clear enough that he absolutely adored you.
Everyday he would gift you something. Wether it was a drawing or just a new machine he invented (that he absolutely wanted you to try out), X would always have a present ready.
And of course you accepted them with a big smile on your face that made his heart flutter.
Poor X. Always trying to impress you. Always trying to make you smile. Always asking you to join his experiments just to spend more time with you, without actually making you join. And of course, endlessly teasing you.
He thought that you would never give into his affections. That he'd never be able to be more than just your very, very good friend.
That was, until Regulus joined the Foundation.
Before X could even begin to show her the way to Scientific Computing Center, you showed up from around the corner, holding a pile of files. You waved to Madam Z and she waved back before leaving the scene.
X's face light up with excitement. He rushed over to you and hugged you, kissing your cheek.
You brushed it off as his playful behavior, this being his usual routine whenever he saw you.
"Hate to interrupt, but are you two a thing?" Regulus asked, shifting her backpack on her shoulder.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh!
You had just realized why X had been so clingy.
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the main "criticism" (term used loosely) of saw x by and large seems to be not the cruelty of the traps themselves, but the utterly inadequate time given to complete them. cruelty does sort of come with the territory & debating the "right" dose for a saw movie is an exercise in futility, yet the almost laughably and woefully meager three minutes on the clock seem to be something of a hang-up to most people. "how were they meant to beat these traps?" "shouldn't john have given them a chance?" "valentina came so close, she did everything, it's not fair" which, while seemingly reasonable questions, all find their answer in one small fact: john kramer has an insatiable hunger for revenge. this is a character flaw that he himself cannot abide by, that he finds… distasteful. the jigsaw dogma is a metaphorical wool that he pulls over his own eyes, it's a distraction from the truth, it's his copium. the man invented a pseudo-religion to justify his crimes, which is… well, haven't men been inventing religions for this express purpose since the dawn of time? it's only in line with the trend.
point being, his gracious gift of a whole three minutes to saw one's leg off and extract bone marrow, to saw one's skull open and pick out brain matter, to break one's bones while being cooked alive by a radiation machine—it's… for his benefit more than anyone else's. deep down, he's never expected them to beat their tests. he never expects anyone to do so (but if they do, it's whatever at that point—because at the very least they've suffered.) though that's a tough pill to swallow, and he chooses not to. time and time again, he chooses not to. when he sat on that bench in that park, enjoying a lovely day out while fantasizing about a petty thief getting his fingers broken one by one & getting his eyes sucked out, he revealed everything. he revealed how much of a farce rehabilitation is, he revealed how much he'd rather see a person killed horribly than anything else. he revealed that he too likes how brutality feels.
he'd have us think the victims are picked somewhat at random, that he's simply being a good samaritan giving any old lowlife nobody a "new chance at life." he's not! cecil caused the death of gideon. amanda was one of the reasons cecil did what he did (and btw do not for a second think that hoffman was going to tell john something he didn't already know. amanda died for nothing in iii, because why else would have john targeted her in the first place?), easton and his buddies fucked john over insurance-wise, bobby offended john's sensibilities, kerry was too deep in the case, lawrence was a bit of a dick to him at the hospital... so on and forth. every last one of them a target of john's revenge fantasies, even if they did arrive wrapped up in layers of delusion and grandeur.
he still loved amanda though. and make no mistake abt that
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Best Underrated Shows
Saving Me
Saving Me is about a lonely old guy who invents a time machine so he can go back to his child self and fix all his past mistakes. I learned about this show from this video titled Watch THIS instead of Hailey's On It by M!n!mal M!ss Art. Despite this video, I was still very excited to watch Hailey's On It. It seemed like a story with a cool premise and cute art style (and ultimately I do really like the show) But Hailey's On It wasn't gonna be out for weeks when I came across this video and this video really sold me on giving Saving Me a try. I never would have even heard of this show without that youtube video which would have been a real shame because Saving Me is fantastic! I hope this show reaches more people and I'm dying for a season 3!!!!!
House of Anubis
Mystery is my favorite genre and House of Anubis is chuck full of it. I used to be obsessed with this show back in high school. I had so much fun coming up with theories and live-blogging my thoughts and opinions about each new episode. Some of the acting & dialogue could be a little cringe sometimes but the story is just so good that it doesn't matter. I've heard that Het Huis Anubis (the Dutch version of the show that House of Anubis is based on) is even better, though I haven't gotten around to watching it yet.
Over the Garden Wall
Those of us who have seen Over the Garden Wall seem to agree that this show is amazing! Which makes it feel a little weird to call it underrated. But it seems like so few people have actually seen it. Maybe because it was a mini series, it couldn't reach the same level of popularity as other shows of similar quality. If you like Gravity Falls, you'll likely enjoy Over the Garden Wall as well. (Wirt is even voiced by the same guy who voiced Dipper!) I would highly recommend anyone that hasn't seen it already.
Dead End: Paranormal Park
I feel like it's pretty rare for animated series to exist in the horror genre for some reason. It truly is an untapped market. But if you love horror and animation, Dead End is the show for you! (Of course it's kid friendly horror since the target audience is children) The two main characters, Barney and Norma get jobs at a haunted park and work together to fight ghosts and demons. Dead End has a super cute animation style, in my opinion, and a very diverse set of characters. I encourage everyone to watch it!
Just Add Magic
Just Add Magic is based on a children's book by the same name. It's a show about three girls who love to cook and basically discover that they can use cooking to do magic. It's a pretty interesting take on how magic works in their universe. It's very fun to watch. All of the actors are also so talented! And one of those actors is Zach Callison (the voice of Steven Universe)!
The friendship between the trio is awe-inspiring! They have so much chemistry. It's a pretty fun watch.
The Last Kids On Earth
Based on a comic of the same name, this show is about a group of kids who have to survive on their own when a zombie apocalypse breaks out. And other various creatures start to threaten them (or even become their allies) It's basically a cute found family story. The premise is pretty simplistic but that's what I love about it. The animation style of The Last Kids On Earth is so beautiful as well!
I'm still waiting for a season 3!!!!!
Code Lyoko
I remember as a kid being aware of this show and thinking it looked kind of interesting (and I always loved the theme song!!) but I never ended up watching it back then because I let peer pressure get the better of me. I remember I met someone who brought up how much they loved the show. When I heard them express that interest, I was at first excited to ask them more but before I had the chance, everyone else started making fun of him for liking Code Lyoko.
I guess it was like the nerd show or something? I don't really know why it was considered cringe to like Code Lyoko but upon seeing my peers act this way, I decided I can't like Code Lyoko if I want to fit in. So, I avoided watching it. But earlier this year, when I was flipping through channels, they were showing old episodes of Code Lyoko! I was intrigued since I remembered it from childhood and thought I'd actually give it a chance this time. And it's actually a pretty good show! It can be slow at times but overall I enjoy it.
If you're like me and avoided watching this back then due to peer pressure, I highly recommend leaving that in the past and just letting yourself enjoy this show!!
Slugterra
Slugterra is honestly pretty similar to Pokemon, except it's slugs! And the entire series takes place underground. Basically, there's a whole underground world called Slugterra, home to slugs, trolls, moles, etc. And all the slugs have cool powers so the people collect & befriend slugs so they can use them as weapons ("slugslinging"). If you like Pokemon, you're sure to like Slugterra!
Detentionaire
I discovered Detentionaire randomly while I was searching through Amazon's library of cartoons. I was looking for a new show to watch and just stumbled upon this one. It looked pretty interesting and I was surprised to see it was a show from 2011. I don't know how I missed this show back then. Idk if maybe it only aired in Canada or something? (cuz it's a Canadian show) But anyways, Detentionaire is such an intriguing show where the main character, Lee, discovers some grand conspiracy and has to try to expose it to prove his innocence so he can get out of detention. It's such an interesting concept. And, as I mentioned earlier, mystery is my favor genre, so I had a lot of fun with this one.
The only problem though is, of course, it ends on a cliffhanger. The show got canceled before they had the chance to conclude the story in a satisfying way (or any type of way) so watch at your own risk.
Catscratch
I honestly don't even remember what this show was about but I do remember enjoying this show and being excited when I saw a new episode was out. I remember thinking it was so funny. I just don't think enough people know about this show.
#saving me#house of anubis#hoa#just add magic#over the garden wall#otgw#dead end paranormal park#dead end netflix#depp#dead end park#the last kids on earth#last kids on earth#tlkoe#code lyoko#slugterra#detentionaire#catscratch#nickelodeon#amazon pride video#netflix#cartoon network#teen nick#byutv
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uhhhh lore drop much??????
when you take into account the fact that machines began being developed during WW1 in the ultrakill universe (there's evidence look it up) and, uh, whatever this is...
you start to consider that maybe the machines aren't "alive" because of their AI, but perhaps it was their flesh and blood. they weren't driven by artificial reasons, but by supernatural ones.
they're called "machines" and not "bots" or "droids" for a reason.
these aren't robots. they're essentially metal golems, risen from the blood of human beings. blood isn't fuel in the sense of going into an engine, it's fuel in the sense of flowing through veins.
this pretty much explains how so many machines managed to reach hell. sure, some just went there out of their own volition like v1 or v2, but pretty much almost all other machines we see ingame would be completely incapable of making it down there by themselves. things like drones or streetcleaners would get their asses absolutely rocked by some of the things we've had to fight on our journey into the depths, and yet we keep seeing them on the way there.
they're in hell because they were ALIVE. they had SOULS. they died and went to hell.
i think this was subtly implied by the earthmover terminal entry said that when the sun was covered by ash and soot, the earthmovers "died out" instead of just "shut down".
this also explains why the only machines we see in limbo are drones and streetcleaners. they're the only ones that weren't invented purely for destruction and chaos, and thus, the only ones capable of being morally "ambiguous".
it's also why we're only now seeing guttermen, guttertanks and earthmovers in the violence layer. they were machines invented purely for war and nothing else, of course they would've all had commited the sin of violence and therefore be damned to AT LEAST go to layer 7.
of course, this theory doesn't really hold up with more, uh, human layers, like greed or wrath. machines can't be greedy, they have no concept of money. machines can't be wrathful, they can't express anger.
the same can't be said for lust, though. mindflayers are the only new machines we see there, and uh, you can probably see what i mean just by looking at them. yeesh. their rather revealing forms are enough to offend the holy father and damn them to such a layer.
neither can it be said for gluttony. machines can very much be gluttonous, seeing how they obsess over wanting blood to fuel themselves so much, when in reality they could last a long time without having to refuel, yet they yearn for blood anyways. think about it. what is food, but fuel for humans?
just to make ends meet in this theory i've got going, i'm just gonna assume that hell does sometimes move machines around layers for the hell of it (pun absolutely intended lmao)
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Drifting - Part 1
Geckins and chintians are very good mechanics.
Watching either species work, it would be easy to assume that all either of the one-foot-tall species had to do was glance at an engine and they'd be able to say 'oh, that's how that works'. That wasn't true of course, but their knack for mechanics and ability to build, repair and design machines was unparalleled amongst the stars.
The one thing both species did better than any of the larger species of the galaxy was mechs. To the humans, the moment they glimpsed a hulking walking machine, all their science fiction dreams came true in one moment. As to why it was the diminutive species that invented machines that made the taller and larger species have to look up, no one wanted to really say out loud. The geckins almost proudly wore the chip on their shoulder about their size thanks to the far larger ssypno struggling to convert the geckin people into a vassal state before seemingly giving up. The chintians on the other hand always had their eye on their neighbours; the canids. Neither species had a good introduction in the Galactic Community and had paid for their membership in blood.
The design of their machines however, differed depending on who made them.
Chintians piloted their mechs via the use of artificial intelligence, two separated minds working in tandem with one another. Talking, communicating and planning their goals together. The geckins however, used direct connection with the machines themselves. There wasn't an intelligence within the machine like the chintians, but the pilots often reported that the machines had a personality beyond their own.
The short comings of the chintian design was the delay in between seeing and reacting to something, not to mention the separation between mech and pilot. The issues with geckin design was the draining aspect of piloting their mechs on the pilot itself. Geckin pilots were often geckins who appeared sickly, tired or gaunt. As if they were being drained of their very life force.
But, for the time being, these mechs were not heavily used in fighting. At least not officially. The Galactic Community government had no mechs in their standing army, regardless of what reports from separatist forces suggested. The GC merely pointed out soldiers of fortune were a thing and they could utilise whatever hardware they had access to.
It was when Casper had been practically dumped in Geckin territory with his meagre belongings that he shortly afterwards discovered all of this. The fact that they greeted him atop walkers that put them at his height was not lost on him. The fact he reacted with unconcealed amazement and awe meant that Casper, very quickly, became a celebrity on the Geck home world, his reaction and gushing about the walkers broadcast over and over to all corners of the planet.
It was a mere three weeks later, when Casper was in his quite opulent home a top a tower in the main city, surrounded by a good thirty geckins that they discovered yet more things they liked about humans.
"What's this one say?" Asked a yellow geckin, Casper had given up trying to remember all their names and they simply didn't care. Most seemingly just shouted 'oi, you' and the geckin they were talking to looked round. The young man looked round and observed the DVD that the geckin had pulled out of the pile. Casper had merely seen what was happening on the horizon the other month and swept his had across his shelves of DVDs and tossed them all into a bug out bag along with his books and anything else to hand.
To this day he couldn't say why he'd saved the media, he hadn't thought about it. He just did.
"That one is... Ha... Casper the friendly ghost." He replied with a grin, the translators not having his written language yet meant anything written had to be translated for them.
"You have a story written about you?!" A green geckin exclaimed, jumping from the shelves onto Casper's back. One had to get used to geckins clambering all over oneself if they were staying in geckin space. He could feel no less than three geckins in the various pockets of his cargo pants, fully asleep enjoying the heat of his legs through the material.
"No, just a coincidence. He's about a dead human." That immediately lost any interest in the tale.
"What about this one? Looks like a Tax Two?" Asked a red geckin, holding up a different case.
"Oh, Pacific Rim. Giant monsters attack and the only way to beat them back is giant mechs. What's a Tax Two?"
Casper's question was initially ignored as a surge of multiple-coloured scales across many different creatures ran towards the one holding the approved DVD. It was amazing to the man how quickly they had reinvented a device capable of reading the DVD correctly, but again; it was a species of engineers.
As they settled, Casper's lap becoming buried in the geckins and the rest of the oversized furniture, at least to them, was likewise covered.
"Oh and a Tax Two is a heavy loader. Manipulators instead of weapons. Good for tearing vegetation out and clearing areas, although I bet it could knock out an ursidain if you gave it a swing."
"Huh... I think you'll like this one then..." Casper promised, shuffling down into the seat, content to be a climbing frame for the various blighters for the time being.
"Huh... I wonder how well humans mesh with a suit that big..." asked one of thr geckins turning to fix Casper with a look that was not one Casper had seen before.
For a brief moment, he felt as if the geckin only saw an important cog that needed to be fit somewhere, not a human.
[r/WolvensStories]
[Ko-Fi]
#conservationverse#cuddleverse#human#hfy#haso#humans are space orcs#scalie#human x scalie#geckin#lizard
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Growing Pains: Hand-Washing Clothes (IkeVamp; Sebastian & MC)
Prompt: Write a story all in dialogue, must include characters washing clothes.
Characters: MC/You, Sebastian
Word count: ~350 words
Tags: Pre-relationship, Humor, MC is new to the housekeeper life
a/n: Wrote this a while back as a warm up. When I saw this prompt, Sebastian came to mind instantly. I imagine they would've had this convo early on in MC's "recruitment". Figured I might as well show I'm still alive and writing! Consider this another entry in Memories of the Mansion.
Back to Masterlist
~*~
“Why must Arthur always come back with blood stains on his collar?”
“If the blood makes you uncomfortable, I can do it instead.”
“It’s not so much the blood as it is the implication of what he’s doing.”
“Ah…yes. I can see how that would be unsettling.”
“When did you get used to washing blood of everyone’s clothes?”
“Hmm. Hold on, let me hang this to dry while I think…it didn’t long, maybe two weeks? I started working at the mansion after Sir Isaac joined, specifically because of his…side-effects to his vampirism. Blood wasn’t something that particularly bothered me, but it did take time to get used to the smell of Rouge in the kitchen.”
“I see… Aha! Finally got the spot to come out. Comte doesn’t pay me enough for this.”
“He pays you?”
“Good point. We should both demand a raise.”
“Speak for yourself, I’m perfectly content as I am.”
“That’s because you have access to all of his money as his butler.”
“As do you. You know he’ll never say no to any request you make. You may as well make good use of that.”
“If there’s anything I would ask for, it’s a proper washing machine…were those not invented yet?”
“If they were, we would have our own.”
“Ughhh. No dishwasher, no washing machine. Next thing you’ll tell me, the vacuum cleaner wasn’t invented yet!”
“…”
“…Sebastian, when was the vacuum cleaner invented?”
“For the last time, just because I’m from the 21st century, doesn’t make me a walking, talking Google search engine.”
“…Worth a shot.”
[Bonus scene]
“Now then, back to work. We’ll never get to washing the bed sheets if you’re this slow with the clothes.”
“There’s more?!”
“And then the linens, and then the—”
“And you’re telling me you did all of this by yourself before I came along?”
“Yes, as to be expected. I wouldn’t want our esteemed guests to be burdened by manual labor when they should be focusing on their work.”
“Most of them aren’t even employed! They just sit around and…actually what do they do all day?”
~*~
Back to Masterlist
#alby one-shots#ikevamp sebastian#ikevamp#ikemen vampire#akihiko satou#ikevamp writing#sebastian x reader#pre-relationship#platonic#sebastian x you#sebastian x mc#ikevamp fanfic
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Some More BTTF Headcanons
- Marty only owns three pairs of shoes: sneakers, dress shoes, and flip-flops. He doesn't understand why he needs more than those and drags his feet every time Lorraine takes him out to buy new shoes
- On a related note, back-to-school shopping is one of Marty's least favorite times of the year
- Marty knows the instructors of the aerobics studio because he bought their old workout music cassettes at a yard sale
- Linda and Marty are both super picky eaters
- Dave, on the other hand, will eat anything and has eaten things of dubious-edibility on a dare
- Every McFly child needed to get braces
- Marty is Grandma Sylvia's favorite grandchild. Linda is Grandma Stella's favorite. Dave is Grandpa Sam's favorite. When asked, Grandpa Artie will never answer in fear of upsetting the other two
- Marty and Doc have teamed up to beat Pac-Man, studying and taking notes of the ghost patterns in each level. They have spent over twenty dollars working on this project. They have not succeeded yet
- Doc is Marty's go-to for help with his homework. Marty often needs some tutoring from him for math and science assignments. But other times, having Doc working quietly on a separate project in the same room helps Marty get into focus mode.
- Doc will invent all types of machines to make home chores easier to do, but he will always do dishes by hand. He finds it therapeutic. Einstein helps him by licking the plates clean
- When he was young, Doc used to be good at archery
- Doc knows many words and phrases from a lot of different languages, but it's not enough for full conversations and he can only be considered fluent in English
- He gets 90% of his appearance from his mother
- Doc is mostly a dog person. His mother is mostly a cat person. His father is a no-animals-in-the-house person
- George had an avid fear of his neighborhood's milkman when he was four
- His first job was at the local library
- He is very good at crossword puzzles
- While George is on good terms with his parents as an adult, Lorraine has a somewhat strained relationship with hers
- Lorraine played volleyball and tennis in high school
- She likes to embroider and make her own clothes
- Marlene is one minute older than Marty Jr. and loves to hold it over him at any opportunity
- Marlene is very popular at school. Junior isn't, and is mostly known as "Marlene's brother"
- Junior is part of the school's video club and likes to do behind-the-scenes work
- Needles has been blacklisted from being employed at any store in the mall (twin pines, lone pine— any version of it, he is on a "do not hire" list)
- Needles once ran over another student's foot in the high school parking lot. Whether it was on purpose or an accident has been widely debated. Marty is very sure it was on purpose
- Jennifer is on the school's cheerleading squad
- She is also in the yearbook club
- Clara enjoys preserving flowers and insects as a hobby she learned from her father
- She is fluent in French and can read Latin
- She likes gardening and growing her own plants
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Theory on why we headcanon specific characters as trans more often than others, using the Fizzlebeans as evidence.
Identity based character arcs vs... other stuff based character arcs.
Warning this is EXTREMELY LONG
Starting by analyzing Floofty, as they are my expertise.
Floofty is a scientist with no help, no funding, and ambitious plans. They come across as cold and uncaring, when in reality much of their shortsightedness comes from caring too much. Not for those closest to them directly, of course. But the greater good, and grumpuskind as a whole.
Their previous line of work suggests that when they had more resources, they spent more time helping individuals. Making prosthetics is a HIGHLY variable process, each individual limb that needs one being EXTREMELY different, even on the same person. Therefore they would need to be attentive towards individuals by necessity, even when making scientific breakthroughs. I don't think they'd have amazing bedside manner but I only bring this up to stress that Floofty is capable and willing to care for others should the situation call for it. However, they probably don't feel like they can afford to care after the events that cost them.... everything.
I assume they got their awesome career position through work during school, proving themself academically in a way that their.... abrasive characteristics wouldn't interfere with. Now that they have nothing, they're trying to get it back the same way they got it, by proving themself through actions.... but who they are and how people perceive them is directly responsible for their lack of help on Snaktooth. Actually, who they are likely made it near impossible to rebuild their reputation when inevitably grumps will think they are either chopping test subjects up to make murder machines or a confidentiality liability. They think their work should speak for itself, and who they are shouldn't matter. (They might even believe that they don't matter. It's already clear that their work is worth more to them than their own life.)
Realizing what they mean to others, who they could be to them when they let go of the big picture importance, and how they can help like they so desperately want to is integral to saving them. Let them forget that they are in fact, a grumpus, the very thing they want to save, and they might as well become what they study. Bugsnax.
...
Snorpy, however, as I've stated, is pretty much the opposite. Where Floofty rejects themself, Snorpy protects himself.... prepare for a staggeringly less complete analysis thanks to Not Literally Being Snorpy. Snorpies and Snorpy experts in the notes please contribute.
Snorpy is an engineer whose inventions are held in great esteem in Snaxburg, and yet he believes the world is out to get him. (By the world I mean... the grumpinati) The grumpinati is, in fact, not out to get him, and it takes incredible amounts of jumping to conclusions fueled by intense fear for anyone to shrink their world that small.
It's implied by his previous work that he was previously much more capable of... interacting with the public? being seen? than he is now. Like I mentioned, constructing prosthetics requires a lot of individual time and care, and a lot of interacting with many different grumpuses. But now? He is driven by fear. I can't even blame him, he's clearly deeply traumatized. How would you feel if your life's work was taken and warped for something you found cruel and evil all while you still depended on them for your livelihood? And you already probably had some sort of anxiety disorder?
Moving on, he is actually able to work perfectly fine. In fact, nearly every grumpus is seen using something he invented at least once? Despite inventions like The Knife Shot and flammable tripwire moments he's well liked by the town and everyone trusts his work to... work. But he's so absorbed by his own perceptions that it's impossible for him to take praise or even socialize without suspicion.
Even the relationship he holds most dear, and integral to what we call "Snorpy" is up in the air for him. I can only imagine he didn't ask for clarification or confess to his romantic feelings towards Chandlo out of fear. Fear of what exactly I can't say, as it's probably every possible factor that that course of action would change.
And... well. His main problem is never solved. Shelda is right, he needs therapy. Extensive therapy. But... he still improves. Part of why he does all of this is to protect Chandlo, and hide all of this from him... but after fighting Daddy Cakelegs it becomes a lot more clear to Snorpy that Chandlo is trying to protect him and knows a lot more than he gives him credit for. He's a lot closer to and more equal to Snorpy. Snorpy doesn't have to spend and sacrifice every fiber of his being to the bugsnax to protect who he loves.
That being said, who he is has nothing to do with his character arc. He's Snorpy, he's a nerd, he is an engineer. None of this is brought into question. Floofty's very status of "grumpus" is called into question through their experiments. (on an esoteric level. kinda. bugsnax are weird.)
What they share is their interactions with other grumpuses and how important actually letting themselves connect with others is... but that's something Everyone shares at least a little.
How does this relate to transgender headcanons? Floofty's arc features their identity very heavily, and calling the identity of the self into question is extremely transgender. Sometimes the definition of transgender. At the very least, a part of the process. (everyone is different)
That's why I think Shelda, Chandlo, and Wiggle are so popular for trans headcanons despite not necessarily doing anything outside their gender's norms. Their arcs heavily have to do with who they are and how their actions reflect that. Gramble and Triffany have a little bit of this but I can't rule out their gender non-comformity as the reason.
Of course, everyone is transgender to at least one person in the fandom because there's nothing proving anyone is cis and this fandom is very very queer.
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how I’ve been, revised
(20/09/2023) (Solar Institute Bulletin No. 22) (From London)
Aftershow quiet in Helsinki
Hey,
I just finished writing you a long letter, catching you up on how I’ve been. It ended neatly, tied with a little bow. I chose my words well, but I didn’t tell the truth. So I’m starting again, gonna type and not look back, and send what comes out.
I’m in London, have been since May. Things feel clear here. I haven’t seen many friends; mostly, I’m alone with my thoughts. I go swimming, I go to work, I walk home or take the train, I eat in my kitchen, I go to bed thinking about what I’m making. I’m starting to miss my friends and family, like a vitamin I’m deficient in. Soon I’ll be going back to New York, and then home.
I’m living with heartbreak again. It’s different but the same. I ache all the time, I forget why and then remember. I’m not trying to hide from the pain, I understand now that pain isn’t something to hide from, that there’s actually great beauty in moving with it. But sometimes I’m sick of being with myself. I eat chocolate to try and manipulate the endorphins, bring back the sweet happiness of Easter morning. I sit in the time machine and wait for it to move, but it hasn’t been invented yet.
My body is really inflamed, it’s trying to tell me something and I’m trying to support it but nothing seems to help and I get frustrated. My gut isn’t working properly, my skin is worse than ever, I’ve gotten sick half a dozen times. I realised earlier this year that listening to my body is hard for me, it’s something I never really learned how to do. I’ve been trying to teach myself that this year, but it’s been hard actually, pretty confronting, has made me fully aware of all the times I ignored it or didn’t give it what it needed, shamed it for a fight or flight response, took a handful of pills and pushed through.
The little yellow pill I took every morning for thousands of mornings since I was 15, I stopped taking it 5 days ago. Gonna see how it goes.
I go online and look at everyone. Beautiful people sing to me. Everyone’s gotten really good at the same thing. I look at arched backs and wet flower mouths, the right bag, the right sunglasses. I wonder if it feels as good as it looks, it’s been so long since I chose the best picture from a hundred, lined it up like pulling an arrow taut in a bow, and let it go. Everyone looks very thin. Just thinking that makes me feel tired and far away. I’m not sure if it’s having an effect on anyone else. I keep spending money, wondering if what’s in the package will make me feel right, but I guess I buy the wrong things.
I was gonna go to fashion week in Paris, had all these grand plans, but this week I txted my manager and pulled out. At the start of my career I promised myself I’d never be one of the people in the light smiling if it wasn’t real.
Earlier this year, I ate two handfuls of mushrooms, solid doses that tasted like green dirt. I got a lot of information about what my body had been through in our time so far, what it needed, where God was and where God wasn’t; I felt in my bones how destabilising it is to leave home and start a new life the way I did. I also saw that my body is completely magnificent, and that hating it is as futile as hating a tree; that I truly, truly love doing my job, and that my life is like a beautiful tapestry, and every inch of it is precious and has meaning.
It might seem funny or be easy to forget, but I make records because I need to. The songs are spells; a spell to let go of something, a spell to unlock a door. Every time I put something into words just as I see it, set it to the right music, a knot comes loose in me. But it hurts too, confronting the knots. I’ve made enough records to know that this feeling of my skin coming off is part of it. I know I’m gonna look back on this year with fondness and a bit of awe, knowing it was the year that locked everything into place, the year that transitioned me from my childhood working decade to the one that comes next — one that even through all this, I’m so excited for. It’s just hard when you’re in it.
So in this state, I went out on a short European festival tour. We built a cool new version of the show in a couple days. It was good to change gears and get out of my head. I put effort into the show, changing the setlist and arrangements, it was cool how you picked up on that, and it felt good dancing to the new versions with you, looking out at you, all sweaty with your friends, all on the same drugs. I felt the throb of history that’s under this music now, how each year makes these songs feel more like collectively written and sung pieces. I left my body and merged with yours and it was ecstasy. Then I went home to a business hotel and washed the glitter and smoke out of my hair.
Lauren took some beautiful pictures — sharing a few with you here.
Backstage in Portugal.
Cute Polaroid series of the 6pm, 8pm, and 10pm versions of me on a show day.
I’ve read some great books recently, including Drive Your Plow over the Bones of the Dead by Olga Tokarczuk, Speedboat by Renata Adler, Motherhood by Sheila Heti, Rough Translations by Molly Giles (brought into my life by sweet angel bookworm Chris Chang), Birds of America by Lorrie Moore; am waiting on my copies of ĀRIA by Jessica Hinerangi and Te Ana Ata: Menstruation In The Pre-Colonial Maori World by Ngāhuia Murphy.
Was given Wawata - Moon Dreaming by Dr. Hinemoa Elder which I’m loving looking to as the Maramataka evolves.
It was Te Wiki o Te Reo Māori last week, I loved listening to this from London. This vid from Hemi showing the similarities between te reo Māori and ʻōlelo Hawaiʻi is so sick.
Been meaning to tell you about The Kindness Institute too, a mental health resource for Māori rangatahi that has recently lost government funding. Go check out the beautiful, necessary mahi they’re doing — I know the cost of living is cooked for Kiwis right now and pop stars asking people to donate sux, but if you work at a good sized company maybe you can wrangle a donation from your employers?! I’m gonna email my record company about it.
Other bits that have inspired lately:
Dieter Rams’ principle of “as little design as possible”.
This fantastic interview with Thom Yorke.
Maddie’s unbelievably beautiful Melo inspired tattoo.
Loving the beautiful new Troye songs and vids, Kelela’s Raven hitting right on the e-bike rides home, late to the magic of Frou Frou but glad I’m here, and the rest of my brain is M.T. Hadley, this great Te Whanganui-a-Tara based band Womb, and Talk Talk. And for those it concerns, have been pilled by parasocial big cousins Jason and Chris.
My mum just sent me a Sylvia Plath poem that feels like it sums up the above, I’ll copy it here:
They thought death was worth it, but I
Have a self to recover, a queen.
Is she dead, is she sleeping?
Where has she been,
With her lion-red body, her wings of glass?
Now she is flying
More terrible than she ever was, red
Scar in the sky, red comet
Over the engine that killed her—
The mausoleum, the wax house.
Sylvia Plath, "Stings"
Hope you’re taking care of yourself. Don’t worry about me, I still laugh every day, it’s all moving, even when it goes slow. I’ve accepted the mission — I have a self to recover.
Speak soon,
E
X X X X X
(source: received this email)
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Wanderer/Scaramouche | Small Wish
ıllı Synopsis: Kabukimono, Kunikuzushi, Scaramouche, and Wanderer. His life was a beauty in tragedy, and between those pages lies his encounter with you. Yet, where did you go?
ıllı Genre: Romance, Slight Angst
ıllı Notes: Gender Neutral Reader
ıllı Warning: Mention of death
ıllı A/N: I’ve finally finished it! I’m not sure if I gave him justice, but I love how this turned out. It’s a bit long, but I had to place things here and there to make sense. Please enjoy!
ıllı Part 2: Wanderer/Scaramouche - Heard Wish
"Who are you?" It is the same question I ask every time I dream of you.
I remember the comforting smile on your face, the warm hand that held mine, and the soft kisses you gave. Yet, I can't remember how you looked. I don't recall the person I fell in love with. Instead, I drown in the nightmares fueled by the whispers that say you are nothing but an illusion. It hurts. I want to see you, to remember you.
"Maybe we can be together for eternity in your next life." You mutter, holding my hand tightly. Salty tears trickle down your cheeks, but I can't wipe them away.
Why?
Because I know I died before you. I left you alone. I broke my promise to you.
Blinking the sleep away from your bleary eyes, you were met with the rattan roof that sheltered your slumbering form from the cold wind. Soft shuffles could be heard from below, so you rose from your bed and peaked at the source. It was Araja, waddling away with radishes in his arms. It seemed too much for the Aranara, so you rushed to his side and grabbed it for him. Ignoring his startled stance, you asked where the vegetables would be placed.
"Thank you, Nara (Y/N). I was about to bring these to Arapacati. Please help me carry the ingredients to their home." It was a simple request that you happily obliged. There were also tomatoes, sweet flowers, and mushrooms outside. Quickly drifting to Arapacati's home, you turned to her brothers. They were discussing about the unique dish they planned to serve to everyone. Araphala noticed you and waved at you to come closer.
"Will Nara (Y/N) taste our new invention once you return?" He inquired. It might not be evident because of their facial expression, but you could hear the hopeful tone laced in the Aranara's voice. You nodded, but you turned to Arasaka and warned him not to put too much 'taste of happiness' (sugar) in the dish if he planned to use it. The aforementioned Aranara deflated, but it was for the best. Arasaka had the tendency to oversweet dishes, even those that were meant to be savory.
After praying to the Dendro Archon for the success of the Aranara's dish, you wandered into the forest to see its condition. The fauna and flora were thriving, and only minimal problems were present such as weakened plants and pestering fungi. News was that the Withering Zone had decreased significantly after a certain Traveler rescued the Dendro Archon and healed the Irminsul. You had the opportunity to meet them, and they were kind, as Araja and Arapacati mentioned. Paimon was gluttonous, but she was the best travel companion the Traveler could ask for.
Only the fungi, hilichurls, and ruin machines littered the forest. There were occasional sightings of Eremites and Fatui, but they did not harm the forest. In turn, you left them to their own devices. It was for the people in the city to handle as it was their business. Your role was to assist in guarding Vanarana. As such, you found yourself eradicating several ruin sentinels from the underground ruin that came near the Vanarana. Arabalika was also beside you, using his Ararakalari to take down the weak points of the machines. He once mentioned that it was an excellent exercise to strengthen his power, but at the cost of memories, so there were times when you had to re-introduce yourself to him.
"You're not getting away this time!" You concentrated the dendro energy in your hand and hit the center point of the ruin hunter. It crackled before falling unceremoniously. Leaping in the air, you slowly descended to check for your Aranara companion. Just a few meters from your position, Arabalika was hitting the other sentinels with his weapon. As if they were mere toys, the enemies disintegrated into dust. The forest was peaceful once more.
"Nara (Y/N), strong as always, but Arabalika noticed that your speed had dwindled. Is Nara (Y/N) sick?" He asked, trotting toward you. Your eyes widened at his sharp observation. The facade you put up crumbled, and you confessed that you had been having nightmares that exhausted your body and mind.
The Aranara hummed in thought before floating up to your stature. He touched your forehead and used his power. He noticed a blockage at the back of your mind and advised that you talk to Araja about it. You raised an eyebrow at that. Arama once mentioned that there were memories he could not access, like it was purposely sealed inside you. Although you wished for the Aranara to further elaborate his statement, he had long departed to Sarva.
"All right, I'll go back to Vanarana and talk with Araja. See you there, Arabalika. Stay safe!"You bid him farewell. He waved his arm before disappearing underground, most likely to hunt more ruin machines in the Ruins of Dahri.
Shaking your head at his antics, you vanished back to Vanarana. The moment your eyes landed on its sky, you could not help but gawk in awe. The mystical shade of purple and vermillion never failed to astound you, even to this day. There were no moon, sun, or stars in Vanarana as if it was suspended in time. It was also filled with unique flora only the Aranara could reproduce. They said that the memories of the forest brought forth the vegetation in the area. If Sumeru had the Padisarah, Vanarana had the Viparyas, a dazzling seedless flower created using Vasmrti and the forest's memory.
Trudging back to Araja's house, you found yourself humming the Song of Great Dream. It was the last gift Arama gave you.
"Ho? You're back early, Nara (Y/N). Sit down. I'll prepare some tea." Araja mused, motioning to the chair on the ground floor. You gladly took it before voicing your concern.
"Araja, I've been dreaming strange things lately. I always find myself with a man I don't know. Deep inside me, I have an inkling that I know him. There are feelings of happiness and regret whenever I dream." Araja floated toward you and placed the tea on your lap. You thanked him before he positioned himself atop the table.
"I can only surmise that those are your memories, Nara (Y/N). Remember when we found you, a part of your memories were sealed. We did not have enough power to unseal them, but we believe you can unlock them by finding the right trigger. Nara (Y/N), these dreams might mean that fate is with you, preparing you for what you hid from yourself." He responded. You sipped your tea in silence, thinking about the Aranara's words.
It had been nearly two centuries since Araja and Arama found you in the Fane of Ashvattha. They said you stood absentmindedly in front of the first Vasara Tree before collapsing like a withered log. Luckily, the tree remained active and cushioned your fall with leaves and flowers. The tree asked the two to nurse you, but you were like a blank slate when you opened your eyes. No memories of anything. Both you and the Aranara feared each other. You because of being with strangers, and them due to a human entering the Vanarana, which served as their safe haven. Building trust between the two parties took time, but you were thankful for their patience. One day, you overheard Arana, who had just returned from her journey, inquire about your state. Araja said it was amnesia, and when Arama checked your memories, it blocked him. The seal harbored no ill will, but it seemed like you were the one who placed it there. For what reason? None of you know.
“Thank you, Araja. To be honest, I am scared of my memories. What if I was a bad person? What if I hurt you and the others?” You muttered, anxiety coursing through your veins. The Aranara chief floated to your trembling figure and patted your head.
“I believe Nara (Y/N) was a kind Nara even before we took you. I saw the warm treatment and patience you gave to every one of us here in Vanarana. Even when Arasaka put too much zaytun peach jam on your food, you did not complain and finished everything. Nara (Y/N) is a gentle Nara.” He comforted. Tears welled up in your eyes before nodding, enjoying the head pats the Aranara chief gave.
The next day, you were greeted by a bowl of delicious-smelling food held by Arasaka. You blinked owlishly before he gave you a spoon to eat it. He said that they noticed the scent of ‘sadness’ emitting from you yesterday and wanted to comfort you with food. A smile erupted from your lips, and then you began munching on the dish they made. There was a vast improvement in the flavor.
Once breakfast was done, you informed the Aranara chief that you would be visiting Tighnari in Gandharva Ville to learn more about the Withering Zones and the status of the other forests in Sumeru. Arasaka waddled over to you and queried why you were not scared of the Forest Watcher. You were aware that they feared Tighnari because he was a descendant of Valushka Shuna (desert dogs). You crouched down and assured him that the fennec fox would never hurt you or them. He was reluctant to believe your words, but he trusted your strength. With a smile, you left the village.
Gandharva Ville was hours away from Vanarana by foot, but the forest had been kind to you and provided you ease in transportation across lands as long as you remained in their sight. Transporting yourself to the ville, you instantly found yourself in front of Tighnari's office.
"Tighnari? Are you home?" You asked, peeking at the leaf curtain of the hut. The Forest Watcher turned his head from his work, eyes widening at the surprise visit.
"(Y/N)? Well, this is a nice surprise. Come inside." He offered. You gladly followed in and sat on a spare chair in his office. He inquired about your whereabouts the past few days, which you indulged in. An upset frown marred his face at the facet of endangering yourself, but you promised him that you had Arabalika backing you up when you go around fighting.
Tighnari sighed. He decided to get to the main agenda of your visit, which was to explain the declining number of Withering Zones and its impact on the ecosystem. He started with the effects of Irminsul being healed and how it cut the source for the zones to pester. Without the withering, the forest would recover slowly from the detrimental impacts. Plants might need assistance, but it should not pose an issue to you or the forest rangers. The leylines would also start to stabilize, so fewer overflow effects on fauna and flora in Sumeru were expected.
Digesting the information he laid out, you adjusted your itinerary for the day. For now, assistance in revitalizing wilting vegetation was the best option while the forest rangers eliminated the remaining zones. You might help occasionally, but you were confident that Tighnari and his rangers would do the job just fine. Happy with your findings, you thanked the fennec fox and left his hut with a promise to visit again soon. Tighnari shook his head before returning to his work, but a shuffling outside interrupted his thoughts.
"Hmm? Oh, it's you, Collei. What's wrong?" There was worry evident on his junior's face. Collei huffed out a shaky sigh.
"Who were you talking to just now, Master? There was no one there." She replied. Tighnari froze in his spot.
The common areas you patrolled as self-proclaimed guardian of Vanarana included the Fane of Ashvattha, Yasna Monument, and Chatrakam Cave. Araja admonished them never to enter the Old Vanarana without him or Arabalika as dangerous monsters loitered the deserted region. You heeded his words gravely.
Jumping down the short cliff in Chatkram Cave, you landed on another group of wilting plants. You concentrated the dendro energy in your hand and set it underground. The color of the leaves brightened as they swayed in the wind, overjoyed by the new life given to them. Suddenly, you heard a series of footsteps coming your way. Indigo orbs met your stupefied ones. He looked extremely familiar, like a bygone breeze meeting an old friend.
"Who are you, and what are you doing around this area? Didn't the forest rangers warn the citizens of Sumeru not to wander deep in the forest?" You demanded. The indigo-haired male scoffed at your indignant words before moving past your figure. Offended by his actions, you huffed out that you would not be responsible for any danger that came his way.
"Not to mention, I don't want to be responsible for burying your body. That would be a pain." You murmured, but he heard it loud and clear. Now, it was his turn to be aggrieved.
"Ho? How foolish. You think I'm feeble I can barely lift a rock, is that it?" There was a dangerous glint dancing in his eyes. Not minding the challenge, you replied.
"If the shoe fits." Wanderer was dumbfounded by the sass you showed him. However, he was more bewildered by the lack of recognition from you. A frown marred his face.
Glancing back at the man, you noticed a conflicting expression on his face. You urged the man to move to another area, but it was immediately shot down. He said he had some important business to care for, which he deemed none of your business. He waved goodbye after that and moved ahead.
There was no way for him to enter Vanarana without a special instrument, so you let him be. However, a creeping intuition told you to check on him later, so after aiding the withered plants, you scanned the area for his silhouette. You found a familiar ascetic garb and hat standing just outside the Vanarana. He was deep in thought.
"Who are you really, and what are you here for? As the forest guardian, I can't permit you to trespass this area." You warned again. He gave you a blank look and then sighed. There were no Aranaras in sight, and the Dendro Archon failed to inform him of such problems.
"Look, Lesser Lord Kusanali requested that I inspect this area. Got a problem with that?" He replied. The way your eyes squinted in suspicions was well-known to him, so he shook his head. There was no way for you to believe his words without evidence.
"You won't believe any of my words, so why don't you bring one of those stupid vegetables here? They'll recognize me." He simply said, sitting down on the rock to rest. You were displeased by his attitude but disappeared from his vision nonetheless. He knew you were most likely involved with the Aranaras, considering your protective nature on the said place.
Wanderer let out a shaky sigh the moment you left. After years of losing you, he did not expect to see you in Sumeru, of all places. Why were you here? Never in his life did he wish to quickly return to Nahida and demand if she knew all this time that you would be here. It felt like a cruel mockery of his past, one that he longed to move forward. However, he knew he could never let go of his last betrayal.
"Just how...?"
Moments later, you reappeared outside Vanarana where the young man clad in blue was waiting. Beside you were Araja and Ararycan (he wanted to tag along and see another human). The Aranara chief saw Wanderer and nodded that it was indeed the young man the Dendro Archon brought with her the last time they met. His hat stood out the most, genuinely recognizable even from afar. There was still distrust in your heart, but you opted to give him a chance.
Materializing a wooden lyre designed by the Aranara, you taught him the Song of Great Dreams. You snickered internally at his disgruntled look. He plucked the strings, and the Vanarana in front of you changed to the state you had grown used to. The Aranara around squealed at the sight of Wanderer, while the others peaked curiously from their houses.
"Araja, Ararycan, I will be with Arasaka and Araphala. Call me once you three are done." You waved goodbye to them.
Wanderer watched you go, an uneasy feeling welling up in his chest. Araja cleared his throat to gain his attention before urging them inside his abode. Ararycan sat on one of the stomps and stared at his figure, enamored by the massive hat on his hut. The indigo-haired male was bothered by his stare but decided to relay the Dendro Archon's message to the Aranara chief. They diligently discussed the Irminsul, Tree of Dreams, and the new Ashvattha Tree in the underground of the Old Vanarana.
"Arama will always be with the forest, right? Ararycan can't wait to see Arama again in Sarva. Ararycan will tell him many stories, especially the Golden Nara who helped with the big iron chunks!" The cyan Aranara intercepted. Araja chuckled while Wanderer had an undecipherable glaze in his eyes. Was it pity or empathy? He was not sure.
"I'll report this to the Dendro Archon. We'll personally visit the Old Vanarana. Maybe further in the desert after we resolved the minor issues in the Akademiya." Wanderer voiced. Araja brightened at the news.
"You have my utmost gratitude, Blue Nara. Hmmm? What is that in your hands, Nara (Y/N)?" They all turned to you. In your hands was a tray with three bowls. It smelled delicious.
Placing the tray down, you told them it was Arasaka's newest invention. You taste-tested the dish, so you assured them that it was good. Not too sweet and not too savory, just the perfect balance. Wanderer was reluctant to eat the dish, so you grabbed a spoon and walked to him. He was about to protest, but you shoved it in his mouth. He did not wish to admit it, but you were right.
"Not bad, right? Anyways, sorry if I'm interrupting. I did not want Arasaka's effort to go to waste. I'll be going to the Fane of Ashvattha, Araja. If you ever need me, I'm one teleport away. Sorry if I can't escort you out, uhh... Wanderer, right?" You apologized with a hint of questioning tone at the end of your sentence, uncertain if you got it right. The indigo-haired male winced at the name, not liking the fact that you called him that instead of—Nevermind. It was not yet the time. The three watched you disappear from their sight. Once you were gone, Wanderer also decided to leave the area.
"Thank you for your hospitality, Aranara Chief." He tipped his hat respectfully before going to the Silapna to play the Song of the Great Dream. Like before, he was back in the real world. He glanced around, hoping to catch your figure, but it was impossible to get anything from you. Not when you did not even remember him.
The puppet returned to the Sanctuary of Surasthana, where he reported about the Aranara's situation. Nahida understood the situation and already formulated a plan to assist the children of the forest with the changes brought by the Irminsul. Before she could go, the puppet stopped her in her tracks.
"Buer, why the fuck are they there, and why is it that they don't remember me?" She could hear the frustration in his voice, but an honest answer was all she could give.
"They've been in a state of limbo, you could say. They're not exactly dead, but their spirit had been lost in the transition due to our interference with the Irminsul. I dug up this information. You remember the reason and how they died, right?" She questioned. He nodded.
You two argued about the Doctor's cruel experiments on his body. The distaste you held for the harbinger angered the puppet because it seemed like you were not happy with the path he chose. He thought that you were there to hinder him from reaching godhood. However, you knew better. The Doctor desired to break Wanderer, so you confronted him. It led from one thing to another, and his last memory of you was the moment he saved you from falling down the snowy cliff in Snezhnaya. Your body had long gone cold.
Without knowing the confrontation, Wanderer begged Dottore to save you. He did not know that the Doctor used your body for experiments. He was curious about your constitution and the runes engraved on your wrist. After researching, he found that it was meant to lengthen your life, but your spirit escaped his grasp. Wanderer learned the truth after he tampered with the Divine Tree. It was one of the things he would not forgive Dottore for. Currently, your battered body remained in a special room in Bimarstan, suspended in time and slowly coping.
"Is there a way to get them back?" He asked.
"You have to make them remember. Slowly. Going by what you mentioned earlier, there must be memories sealed at the back of their mind that they could not access alone. At least not with the right stimuli." She responded. Wanderer froze, torn by the decision he had to make. Letting you remember meant recognizing his god-awful attitude. An exhausted sigh escaped his lips.
"Are you scared?" Nahida tilted her head, confused by his hesitation. Embarrassed, he turned his head, but the young god was not far from it. The puppet was terrified. He just found you, and if you were to know his past, you might run away and leave him for good.
"Hmm. Now that's a surprise. I thought you would not mind because they did not seem special to you. However, there must be a change of heart along the way. Interesting. You're shrouded with guilt and now favors them. Don't worry, I think they can handle it. They must be looking for those memories as well." She voiced. Wanderer did not reply and left the sanctuary quietly.
The following day, he marched back to Vanarana. It was a difficult decision on his end, but the feeling of emptiness in your heart must have been excruciating. It was only fair to give you the right triggers to unlock those memories.
“Wanderer? What are you doing back here? Did Lesser Lord Kusanali say anything?” You asked, placing down the timbers you collected for cooking. The Aranara with you squeaked in fear, but you petted its head and assured it that the Nara with them meant no harm. Wanderer was perturbed by the creature’s reaction. He also crouched down and apologized.
“I’m sorry for startling you. And no, I just came to spend time in Vanarana while awaiting the Dendro Archon’s next order.” He returned. Your eyes widened at the tenderness of his voice, almost as if the person you met yesterday was a stranger.
“Are you really Wanderer? Why are you not scoffing or huffing indignantly?” You questioned, trembling at the strange behavior he exuded. He gave you his infamous dead eyes before standing up.
“Don’t get me wrong. I can still insult you whenever I want. I just needed some time away from my duties.” The sincerity in his words made you trust him a little bit. You directed your attention to the Aranara beside you and whispered. It nodded before floating away with the timbers in its hand.
Wanderer raised an eyebrow at its action, but his thoughts were soon occupied by your hand pulling him above Vanarana. It was a sight to behold. He sat down by the cliff and listened to you talk about the place. It seemed like you had grown accustomed to life with the children of the forest. Unconsciously speaking out loud, you confirmed his speculations.
“They’ve become my family. Still, my heart yearns for the past I hid from myself. You might be confused, but the Aranaras rescued me. I had no memories of my life before, and even if I tried to remember, I ended up getting hurt. The migraines I get from pushing my mind were no laughing matter, but I still want to know. Was I a good person? Did I leave the world happily? Did someone cry for my death?” You wistfully said.
Pursing his lips, the puppet released a shaky sigh. Yes, this would be his gift to you. He would gladly take it to his grave if you hate him afterward.
The Dendro Archon’s assistant became a frequent visitor in the Vanarana. A few of the Aranaras learned to interact with him, and they found him tolerable. As for the indigo head, he hated that Ararycan would find opportunities to steal his hat and throw it around like a frisbee. It would make you laugh at the incredulity of the situation, but you made sure to grab it for him and have the Aranara apologize. Not like the cyan Aranara would not do it again.
At some point, he became a staple part of your life. You would go in patrols and come home to see him there. He would say that the Dendro Archon requested him to inspect the area, but you rarely see him go anywhere. It was amusing, to say the least. However, his visits also brought stranger dreams. The man's silhouette started to clear up, but before you could fully see him, the dream would turn into nightmares. There would be a doctor, and you would hear yourself tell him to stop with the experiments.
“You’ve done enough! Can’t you see that you’re killing him?”
“A toy? He’s not a toy for you to play and discard after!”
“You’re a horrible man, Doctor.”
It was always the same, and you would be drenched in sweat by the time you woke up. Araja noticed your disorderly state and advised that you get out of Vanarana. Take in a new surrounding, breathe and forget about your duties for once in a while. Somehow, you ended up in front of the first Ashvattha Tree, where Araja and Arama first found you.
“Lesser Lord Kusanali wants to talk with you, Chief Araja. Maybe she could come here next week?” Wanderer asked, back again in the Aranara’s home to discuss Nahida’s request. The chief gladly accepted the meeting. Before the puppet went, he inquired about your whereabouts.
“Nara (Y/N) left Vanarana to clear their head. It seemed like nightmares began claiming their sleep. I have not seen Nara (Y/N) get a good night's sleep, so this change of pace might help.” He confessed.
Wanderer thanked him and left to find you. Nahida could wait, but he had an inkling that you needed somebody to understand what you were going through right now. Was he the right person for it? Maybe not, but he could care less.
‘Where are they?’ He searched high and low for you, even going into caves to see if you would be in them. However, there was no trace of you. He was about to give up and ask Nahida when he found a strange glow in the Fane of Ashvattha. There, he found your slumbering figure leaning against the tree. It pulsated as you dozed off. He was about to walk towards you when the vines around him reacted as if protecting you.
“Don’t worry, I’m just here to talk to them. I’m a… friend. They’re safe with me.” He was unsure if he was going insane by talking to a tree, but this was Teyvat, where even the most insane thing existed. The vines retracted and revealed your figure. Wanderer carefully trod the path laid out for him.
“Hey, why are you dozing off here in the cold, idiot?” He nudged. You opened your eyes at his voice and yawned. There was no recollection of when you fell asleep, but you could tell this was the best slumber you had in days.
There was a moment of silence between you two until you noticed he was waiting for an answer. Stupefied, you stammered a response saying that sleep evaded you. Not to mention, the nightmares kept you up almost everyday. You followed Araja's suggestion and took in new sceneries. Although, in the end, you still wound up in the Ashvattha Tree.
"Those dreams, have you ever presumed that they could be memories? They said you could attain the past you lost with the right stimuli. Scaramouche, Dottore, Fatui, don't they ring a bell?" Hope and desperation gleamed in his eyes, and you could not fathom the reason for it. His eyes told a thousand words. Before you could utter a thing, an excruciating headache hit your head.
“Hngh! It hurts!” You moaned, clutching your head in pain. It felt like your head was splitting into two as tears gathered at the corner of your eyes. You bit your lips until they bled just to prevent yourself from screaming. The atmosphere around you turned colder, and Wanderer squinted his eyes at what was happening to you. Even if it meant hurting you, he knew you had to remember.
Familiar silhouettes appeared in your mind. There was the doctor named Dottore and a man— No, a puppet named Scaramouche. Both were harbingers of the Fatui, and your fate had been entangled with theirs for some reasons you could not recall.
“What…? I—“ You huffed, your body still trembling. There was no continuation after that, but the remnants of the headache made you dizzy. You wanted to puke, empty your stomach to the bottom, but Wanderer held you against him in comfort. He took your hand and sternly asked for your permission.
“I know that you have many questions right now, but (Y/N), I know about you. If you are willing, I can take you to a place where we can restore your memories." He assured. You peered at him, incredulity coating your orbs. Fear engulfed your body. How could a stranger you had only known for days know more about you? You tried to push him away, but you were too weak.
"W-Who are you, Wanderer? What do you mean? I—" You lurched to the side and emptied the contents of your stomach. He held a pained expression before reaching for you again. Wanderer asked if you could trust him once more. He rambled about how it was for your own good. The confident yet sullen glimmer in his eyes said it all. You slowly nodded, then collapsed on him.
The puppet fussed over your weakened state, but you promised him that it was the stress eating you up. Reluctantly, he carried you to Nahida.
The moment you arrived at the Sanctuary of Surasthana, you were in awe. It was a sacred place you could not help but feel unwelcome. However, the Dendro Archon warmly welcomed you. She gave Wanderer a disappointed gaze, but he brushed it off and asked that she give you your memories back. Nahida glanced at you and asked if you were ready to face what you hid from yourself.
"I may not be, but... I want to face the me of the past and owe up to what I did." Your words reflected those that Wanderer said when he was still as lost as you. He could not help but smile. He was proud of what you had become.
Nahida tilted her head before nodding. She opened up a space, and it swallowed you two. You instinctively closed your eyes in dread of where it would take you. Wanderer remained unfazed, but when the area cleared up, he came face to face with your body. The Dendro Archon asked you to open your eyes and touch the slumbering form before you.
'Is this... my body?' You thought. Wanderer carefully placed you down as you slowly approached your body. It opened its eyes and gazed at you. There was a smile on the body's lips before it embraced you, the soul its missing for centuries. You froze in your place as memories flashed before your eyes. The seal at the back of your mind dispersed, and you watched each day pass by.
The first memory was the kind Kabukimono who Niwa took under his wings. He first met you below the Sakura Tree in one of the villages near the mines. The thunder sakura enhanced the beauty you possessed, and he fell in love for the first time. He did not recognize what emotion it was, but to you, it was adoration. You loved his indigo orbs that seemed to reflect the night sky. However, you were not formally introduced to each other until he saw you again with the sick child.
As if arranged by fate, the child pulled you towards the Kabukimono. His indigo eyes widened at the sight, but he smiled and introduced himself. This time, he hoped to learn about you. Kabukimono would go out of town to work, while you remained at home to care for the child. It was like a little family in a deserted place despite you three not having the same blood. The puppet learned to cherish and love you two, but tragedy struck. The child perished away from death. The puppet did not understand why he broke his promise. He could not discern death. You tried to explain to him its concept.
"Are they always fated to die? Does that mean you will also leave me? You will break your promise?" He was desperate. He did not want to be alone. You could only look to the side, unable to answer him truthfully. Kabukimono wistfully laughed.
"Don't die on me, (Y/N). You have to promise you will do everything not to die. Don't betray me as they did!" He hissed. You reached for his hand, but the tears trickling down his face stopped you. Nodding your head, you assured him that you would live for him. Yet you knew that it was only a matter of time.
Days passed by, and Kabukimono changed his name to Kunikuzushi. He wreaked havoc amongst the Raiden Gokaden. Blood was spilled, yet you could only watch in horror. You still loved the man, but he longed for an impossible revenge and power. Soon, the Fatui reached out to him. He was recruited and renamed Scaramouche "The Balladeer". Snezhnaya was a frigid place, and their plans frightened you. Scaramouche sought to keep you in the dark, but some things slipped here and there.
At one point, the Doctor was intrigued by his constitution and implored to conduct experiments on his person. Scaramouche was repulsed initially, but Dottore assured him it would help with his revenge on the Electro Archon. He would be cut up, injected with strange serums, and connected to machines that destroyed his body, but Scaramouche remained resilient. You could not stand how he strived to reach his dreams and confronted him.
"What do you know?! You're just a lowly mortal, (Y/N). Remember that you will leave me too. I have prepared myself." He coldly stated.
"I promised you that I would remain alive, did I not? I am also researching ways to extend my life, Kuni—" He held your wrist tightly and threw you to the side. It was a silent warning not to mention that name. You feared the Scaramouche in front of you. He could kill you if he wanted but chose not to.
The only option you had was to confront the Doctor. The harbinger only laughed at your attempt. He mocked your efforts to protect Scaramouche, but he proposed an option. It was to use your body in his experiment. He noticed the runes on your wrist and desired to uncover the secrets behind them. You declined his offer. It was one of the arts taught to you by a dying adepti during your research to lengthen your life. There was no way you would willingly give it away. The Doctor clicked his tongue in distaste before turning his head away.
"Then amuse me, (Y/N). At what lengths are you willing to protect your lover? Will he be happy with your interference?" He scorned. You clenched your fists tightly before leaving his laboratory. Dottore chuckled at your stubborn nature.
"One way or another, I will have you." He uttered, satisfied by the turn of events.
Scaramouche continued with his ordeal with the Doctor. As much as he despised the man, he was his key to reaching godhood. On the other hand, you were determined to impede Dottore's experiment. He was initially amused until you discovered his human experimentation on god residues and Delusions. He sighed at the unfortunate turn of events. Because of your stubborn nature, death was the only option for you. He could not waste his 'materials' anymore after all. Not to mention, your body seemed worthy of his attention.
"In the end, you could not protect him. Hilarious. You could have just accepted my terms, and I would have been lenient with the Balladeer. How pitiful." He chaffed. You tightly held onto his wrist, desperate to pull the scalpel out of your heart, but Dottore pushed further. Your vision blurred as your breathing slowed down.
"Y-You'll get your karma soon...bastard." He dismissed your threats and threw you off the snowy cliffs. You watched his figure disappear in the snowstorm. Thoughts of Scaramouche filled your mind, pained apologies uttered in the howling winds. Your memories ended bittersweetly.
As you opened your eyes, your gaze landed on Wanderer (Scaramouche, Kunikuzushi, or Kabukimono, his names overwhelmed you). He gently held your figure against him, and the kind act warmed your insides. Yet, the guilt in your person coated your heart.
"I'm sorry... for leaving you..." You muttered, holding his hand tightly. Tears gathered at the corner of your eyes until they fell one by one. Soon, you were a sobbing mess. He smiled ruefully and kissed your forehead.
"I should be the one who's sorry, stupid. You endured my god-awful attitude and even had to deal with the Doctor. Ha! The nerve of that narcissistic bastard." He replied. You weakly chuckled before resting your body against him in exhaustion.
"You know I'm willing to do everything for you. It was all for you." You mumbled before your consciousness absconded.
The space around you dispersed. Nahida appeared and greeted you with a smile. She noticed your fatigued figure and let you relax for the time being. The Dendro Archon focused her attention on Wanderer and inquired about what occurred inside. He scoffed and turned his back to her.
"They got their memories back, and... we were able to reconcile. There are still many things to discuss, so we will take our leave. You have my gratitude, wise god." He fixed your figure against his hold and left the Sanctuary of Surasthana. Nahida shook her head and remembered that Wanderer forgot to give his report about the Tree of Dreams.
"I'll just pull him back here tomorrow. I'm sure (Y/N) will understand if I take their lover away for a while." She giggled.
The following day was filled with reticent apologies and assurance. Wanderer with his attitude while you with the broken promise. It was out of character for him to be affectionate, but this was his chance to make up for what he made you go through. Once that was fulfilled, he whispered that you were free to leave him and have a happy life, but you immediately opposed it.
"This time, this time, don't let me go, Kuni." You begged. His eyes widened, and his fingers trembled against yours. To him, you were too nice for the cruel world he knew. If possible, he would like to hide you from the ugly things of Teyvat, but you would surely be angry at him.
"You're right. I'm the stupid one. Then this time, we will be together for eternity. I'll make sure this small wish will be ours to fulfill." You smiled at his words.
"By the way, if I recall correctly, weren't you supposed to report to Lord Nahida about the Tree of Dreams? I recall Araja talking about the progress of the plan about it." You uttered. Wanderer froze. He totally forgot about it after the incident yesterday.
'She's right. I believe you have to come to my office now, Wanderer. Or do you want me to drag you back to the sanctuary in front of your lover?' A gentle voice resonated around his home. He scowled before standing up to prepare. You lightly laughed.
Standing up, you picked up his hat and placed it on his head. He was surprised but more taken aback when you kissed his cheeks. The sudden affection made him flustered.
"We have an eternity to compensate for the lost time." You whispered. He gently held your hand and nuzzled it. It was this warmth you had been chasing in your dreams. You finally remember the person you fell in love with, and the promise between you two was forged anew.
'Not to interrupt this ending, (Y/N), but you might want to tell Tighnari that you're a living person. I think you spook the living mushrooms out of him after Little Collei asked who he was talking to from your last visit.' Nahida urged. You blinked owlishly before following Wanderer outside. You did have some explaining to do, and you might as well visit Araja and the others while you were at it.
Please do not copy or repost my stories, but notes and reblogs are always appreciated!
#genshin impact#genshin#romance#genshin x reader#angst#slight angst#genshin wanderer#wanderer#scaramouche x reader#scaramouche#wanderer x reader#kabukimono#kunikuzushi#kunikuzushi x reader#genshin scaramouche
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