"I feel like everything happens to you!"

-- My therapist

I’m just begging you: Don’t make us go there again.

The whole "Claudia is now his sister"/Louis' sibling comparisons are never gonna sit right with me because that's never going to erase the fact that Claudia exists as a vampire partly because of him. Their relationship will never have this clearly defined role of siblings in the same manner Louis had with Grace or Paul, even if he was their older brother and was implicitly given the role of providing for them as the successor and manager of his family's estate. Because Louis was never responsible in part for their creation, the reason why they existed the way that they do in terms of behavior and life itself.

It also makes his betrayal of her all the more heartbreaking in ways that him and Grace drifting apart never will. He was her father, and didn't provide emotional support for her. She had to turn the tables and try to assume the role of being on an equal level because of this failure but this doesn't make him not choosing her any less painful than it did the first time. Even as they shift roles, take or give emotional responsibility one has towards the other, the fact that Claudia exists the way she does because of him and Lestat will always be there.

shanks' need/desire to protect his friends and family from anything and everything vs buggy's gigantic inferiority complex that makes him take any act of protection/love as someone looking down on him, FIGHT

You ever read something and think "things would be different if Makoto were here?" No? Just me? Okay

okay maybe I should seriously reconsider my path in life and sell my soul to marketing or journalism instead

This just in:

Exploring themes of psychosis and being manipulated by someone you adore(whether simply hero worship or more) is SCARY and no one should be interested in stories.

“Psychosis is real and scary!” Yeah and that’s why stories about characters who deal with it are a good things. It’s humanizing. Don’t tell me how to view a time in my life. I’m tired of people telling me how to feel about it and I already lost people I care about. But I have friends who came back and made it clear they were worried about me, so it’s not *that* difficult to understand.

Ignoring your experiences and shoving them under the rug out of guilt is self harm, not processing it you entitled shits.

It is truly so funny to work myself out of depression in a 2.5 year upwards crawl, reach a point where I actually like and value myself and think I may, in fact, be a treasure-

only for the academic job market to turn to me, lovingly take my face in its hands, and say "...then perish."

COACH what to do if im disabled and can't run for exercise... what the fuck do I do

ONLY DO WHAT YOU'RE CAPABLE OF, SON. IT DEPENDS ON THE REASON FOR YOUR INABILITY TO RUN. YOU MAY CHOOSE TO DO EXERCISES THAT RELY LESS ON YOUR LOWER BODY, SUCH AS SIT-UPS (WHICH CAN ALSO BE DONE STANDING BY BENDING YOUR LEGS SLIGHTLY THEN BOWING AND STRAIGHTENING AGAIN LIKE YOU WOULD REGULAR SIT-UPS IF YOU HAVE DIFFICULTIES GETTING ON THE GROUND), CHIN-UPS, PULL-UPS, DIPS, SO ON. YOU ALSO MAY CONSIDER FREE WEIGHT EXERCISES WITH SOMETHING SMALL. 1KG DUMBBELLS CAN BE BOUGHT FOR AS LOW AS 5 REÁL; THEY'RE SMALL ENOUGH TO STORE AND CAN GO A LONG WAY (BICEP CURL, ZOTTMAN CURL, FLAT DUMBBELL FLY, ARNOLD PRESS, CROSS BODY HAMMER CURL, SPIDER CURL, SCAPTION EXCERCISES, I COULD GO ON -- THESE ALL WORK EXCLUSIVELY YOUR UPPER BODY MUSCLES). MEDICINE BALLS AND KETTLEBELLS TEND TO BE MORE EXPENSIVE BUT CAN ALSO BE AN OPTION TO LOOK AT. AND FINALLY, IF THOSE AREN'T OPTIONS, STRETCHING THREE TO FOUR TIMES A WEEK FOR AT LEAST 20 MINUTES CAN HELP ALLEVIATE MUSCLE TENSION AND REDUCE PAIN AND TENSION IN THE BODY AS WELL AS INCREASE FLEXIBILITY, BALANCE BLOOD CIRCULATION AND LUCIDITY. YOU MAY WANT TO DO STRETCHES FOR YOUR LEGS REGARDLESS TO ENSURE THEY DON'T GO UNDERUTILISED

COACH... OUT❗❗💥💪💪

i gotta be real, i absolutely hate being texted on my days off lmao like unless we’ve made plans to go out or something, leave me the fuck aloneeee

im so fucking mad at myself and my stupid fucking coping mechanisms and that it took me this fucking long to realise im a people pleaser and not only that but the most pathetic kind - the kind that doesnt *actually* manage to please anyone lol

and that's on top of pinning my distress and suffering and the awful time i'm going thru on the fact i'm on hrt

The idea that you can't work on bettering yourself and your mental health without a therapist is so messed up to me. The idea that going to therapy is supposed to automatically make things better, too.

:)

When it comes to RPGs, I am in favor of people spinning it so that their characters don't always get along with their companions, I think that's fun, but when people spin it like, "my character wanted to hit this character," it kind of makes you seem like a giant child.

well folks its been a good two months of denial but i am finally ready to admit that the reason everything sucks is because of major depression relapse. if i werent so depressed id make this everyone elses problem by projecting it on to blorbo but alas