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smusherina · 21 days

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yard work - chapter 11 (regina george x reader)

fandom: Mean Girls (all media)

pairing: Regina George x OFC/Reader

summary: You'd been in the same class as Regina George since kindergarten. You'd lived on the same street even longer. Once upon a time, when life was sandbox disputes and who got the swing first arguments, you'd even been friends. Now, in junior year of high school, you doubted she even remembered you. The same couldn't be said about you. You definitely remembered her.

chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / chapter 4 / chapter 5 / chapter 6 / chapter 7 / chapter 8 / chapter 9 / chapter 10 / chapter 12

Making the scrapbook was cathartic. Remembering the good times, the innocence of your childhood, was as much of a joy as it was painful. The pictures were all quite good quality since Abuela had had a film camera. Some photos had been taken with a digital camera, which had probably originally belonged to the Georges and ended up in your possession somewhere along the way.

Regina and yourself playing in the Georges' backyard and swimming in their pool, beaming smiles directed at the camera. You could almost hear the laughter. I miss when we used to be able to just have fun together like this. I guess it's a part of growing up.

Regina in a white frilly dress, carrying a small basket of flower petals, donning a crown of roses on her head. She was pouting, clearly unimpressed by the whole thing. You hadn't been at the wedding since it was a George event, but Regina's mom had been so elated her daughter had gotten to be the flower girl. I remember I was so jealous you got to go to a wedding and I couldn't. You hated it, though, which was funny. You used to leave the room whenever your mom insisted we watch the tape. I wonder if she still has it.

You sitting with Regina, hip to hip, on plastic chairs while a newlyborn Kylie slept in your laps. Regina, eyes stuck on her baby sister and a thoughtful look on her face, while you looked at the camera with a smile. She's growing up so fast. Don't think I don't know you care about her. There's gonna be a time you'll regret not spending time with her. I already feel it.

Mrs George, Abuela, Regina, Kylie in her mom's arms, and you grouped together at a parking lot. You and Regina had on little graduation gowns and had scrolls in your hands. Elementary school graduation. The summer before middle school. End of an era. I love your mom's clothes, they're so nineties. Does she still have those jeans? You should get ahold of them before somebody else does...

Remember when I sliced my hand open when we were peeling apples? That was a time for sure. I still have the scar!

You taped pictures onto the pages, wrote little things here and there, hoping the labour of your love wouldn't end up in the garbage. Or if it did, Regina would read skim through it first.

I think this album was the first time we agreed on music. Britney Spears really brought us together, huh? We even learned the choreography of Baby One More Time. Mrs George loved it. I bet there's a video of that somewhere.

Mostly the scrapbook was filled with anecdotes about your childhoods together. You did write a letter of sorts on the first page, regarding your intentions with the whole thing.

I made this for you to commemorate the good times we had. You know me regrettably well, so I think you know how I tend to hold onto things. I still have that gaudy pink Build-A-Bear you made me for Valentine's Day that one time. It's one of my most important possessions, only second to the memories we have together. You'll always be a friend to me, Reggie. If not forever, or from now on, then back then. I love you. Yours, Jorts.

You'd pretty much finished the whole thing by the end of the weekend. You spent Monday and Tuesday decorating the front cover, mostly because you purposefully put it off. You cut out letters from magazines and glued them there, painstakingly forming the words Reggie & Jorts. You'd tried to come up with something clever, but making a pun or a dumb joke felt like cheapening the whole album. A simple name made up for with fabulous decorations!

You weren't much of a painter, but you figured it'd be fitting if the album reflected its contents. It was fine if the roses you painted looked like a five-year-old did them. A good majority of the pictures featured you and Regina huddled around a crafts table, similar projects scattered all around you, young with clumsy hands but filled with artistic passion.

The album in itself was an earthy green colour, something Regina undoubtedly found ugly. The flowers brightened it up somewhat, but there was only so much ages-old acrylic paints could do. You outlined some with Sharpies. If you didn't know better, one could assume it looked like that on purpose.

You took it with you to school on Wednesday. You had it weighing your backpack down the whole day. You sweated under all your layers, and by the end of it, you were sure you were sporting some epic pit stains. Gross, but you were so nervous. You hadn't broken into anyone's locker in so long. And it was Regina George's locker.

You loitered around the hallways as they emptied out steadily, people heading home or off to extracurriculars. As you approached Regina's locker, you swallowed down your nervousness and got to work.

It wasn't hard. The combination locks were all old and weak, more of a formality than an actual barrier between one's stuff and a burglar. The lock clicked open easily and you wasted no time in stuffing your album inside.

"Hey!" Just as the resounding click of the lock going back into place came, a voice called out to you. "What are you doing with Regina's locker?"

"Uhh..." Gretchen Wieners stood at the intersection of hallways, hands on her hips and accusatory eyes burning holes in you. You made the swift decision that you did not have time for this. You booked it.

"Hey! Get back here!" Gretchen, surprisingly considering her heels, started after you. "What did you put in it? You cannot prank Regina, or- or, oh, was it a bomb?"

"It's not a bomb!" You shouted over your shoulder, sprinting towards the exit. The aggressive clacking of Gretchen's heels on the floors as she ran after you would surely haunt your nightmares. How could she even keep up with you?

"If it's not a bomb then what!" How was she closing in on you? It seemed like she was not even fazed by your little race, meanwhile, you were already winded. The exit was not that far away, but it felt like miles.

"It's Regina's business now! Ask her tomorrow at school or something!" The doors to freedom approached. "Stop chasing me!"

"Stop running!"

"No!"

You burst out and quickly hopped down the stairs, two at a time. Gretchen was still on your tail, but once she got to the top of the stairs shouted: "Karen! Tackle her!"

You hadn't even noticed Karen fucking Shetty. There was no not noticing her when the girl sprinted at you with perfect athletic form and squashed you like a linebacker.

You collided and flew into the snow. Better than the concrete of the footpath but it still hurt like a bitch.

"Get off of me!" You tried to get out from under her, but Karen was surprisingly dense. She was small but it was as if there were stones in her body instead of organs. "Fuck!"

"Keep her there, Karen, very good."

"Thanks!" Karen beamed, which was a much more common expression on her than the bloodlust she'd shown earlier.

"This has nothing to do with you." You snarled, still wriggling. "This is between Regina and me."

"Whatever's between Regina is between us," Gretchen said, all hoity-toity. "Now, tell me exactly what you put in her locker."

"A fucking photo album." You hissed, closing your eyes and clenching your jaw. What lie could you come up with? "Our families used to know each other. It's mostly pictures of her, so I just thought to... Return it."

"Oh, that's so nice!" Karen's hold loosened and you went to escape.

"Nuh-uh, not good enough." Just like that, Karen's weight slammed back down onto you. Your breath wooshed out of your lungs.

"What more do you want?" You wheezed out, getting sick and tired of this.

"Why was it in your possession?"

"I don't fucking know! It just was!"

"Hmm. And why couldn't you just give it to her?"

"You think that would've gone well, Gretchen? Seriously?" You turned your head with great effort, staring up at the girl. "Please, just let me go."

"I don't think I believe you." Gretchen squatted next to your head. "We're going back and checking it's what you say it is. And then you might be free to go."

"Fuck you." You hissed but made no move to book it when Karen hauled you up.

"That's not very nice." Karen pointed out.

"I don't want to be nice to Gretchen right now." You had no real issue with Karen, even if she had just tackled you.

"Oh, okay." You couldn't see her when she was holding your wrists behind your back, but you could imagine she was bobbing her head up and down like she was known to do.

You were walked back into the building, going mostly without a fight. Gretchen strutted along proudly as if capturing you was some great victory. Regina had trained her well. You weren't sure if that was impressive or just sad.

"Open it." Gretchen gestured once you were back at Regina's locker.

"I need my hands to do that." You helped out, smiling at Gretchen like she was stupid. Sputtering and offended, she instructed Karen to let go.

Instead of running like you should've, taking the chance you could get out if Karen didn't get a one-up on you, you obediently cracked the code again. Was it selfish that you kind of wanted others to know about you and Regina? Was it totally horrible of you to want to know it was real and have proof of that? Well, if it was, there was no helping it.

Gretchen snatched the album from the locker before you could even think to touch it. Karen sidled up to her, peering over her shoulder as she opened it.

You stood by, waiting for their judgement and looking at the ceiling. There'd been a water leak right there, based on the discolouration. Gross.

"You... You're J. J is for Jorts." Gretchen said. She sounded weird, like hollow or something. "J is for Jorts." She said again, breathy and disbelieving.

"What?" What the fuck was going on?

Karen spoke then. "She talks about J a lot. Like, a lot a lot. A whole lot." You nodded slowly as Karen went on. "J's like, her true love. It's so cute."

"J is not her true love, Karen! They are both girls." Gretchen pointed out. You had to agree. "Are they?" She looked you up and down judgementally.

"Yes. I am a girl." You said. It was true, you were female and around the age that it was acceptable to be referred to as a girl. Even so, it made you distinctly uncomfortable.

"Hmm." Gretchen didn't seem to believe you. Karen was busy cooing at the pictures of small Regina. It was sheer luck they hadn't bothered to read your writings.

"Look, can I go now? I know I'm busted, you're probably gonna confiscate the album, and Regina will never see it. Happy?"

"No. Karen, please put it back in the locker." Gretchen said, not taking her eyes off of you. Karen did as asked with a pout. "What is your relationship with Regina?" The album was back in the locker, but it hadn't been locked again.

"Nothing." And that was true. There was nothing there anymore.

"That's a lie and you know it. If you're J, then you've known each other at least since middle school. Based on the pictures, even longer."

"Who is J?" You asked in exasperation.

"Somebody who she has protected for years now. Somebody who is always better than we could ever be." Gretchen pointed between herself and Karen. "J is important to her."

"Okay, well, good for J, I guess."

"You're so infuriating." Gretchen sighed, pinching the skin between her eyes.

"You aren't the first to tell me that."

"Of course, because Regina has said that to you. Because you've known each other forever. Because you're J."

"Listen, I may look a bit butch, but I have a perfectly ordinary girl name."

"That is not the point!" She spoke fast and high-pitched. "You. It's you. You've been under our noses this entire time! Do you realize how much easier things could've been if you were around?"

"Excuse me?" Now, you were really lost.

"You're excused," Karen said cheerfully. You nodded to her in thanks.

"We could never be as good as you. It was like we were placeholders for the ultimate pretty girl she'd somehow let slip. And it's you. In a flannel and hoodie, ratty jeans, dirty shoes, no fashion sense to speak of. It's you." She said that last part with contempt.

You were reeling. Regina had talked about you to these two. Had compared them to you, cited that you were better. For years she'd done that. She'd never forgotten about you.

"Look, Gretchen, I'm sorry Regina's treated you badly." You'd lost the need to defend her, even still. Then again, even if you hadn't, there was little you could argue about with the two she'd tormented the most. "You can probably tell this is something Regina doesn't want coming out."

"What does that matter?" Gretchen asked, eyes far away and legs beginning to pace. "We could- could finally bring her down. Yes. We have J, we have everything she wants. She'll come grovelling."

You took a deep breath. You didn't feel angry, you were too tired to get angry at mean girls at this point. Besides, nobody could rile you up like Regina.

"You're wrong." You put it plainly. "What Regina's been doing to these people, to everyone around her, is wrong. But what I find despicable is how everybody is the same. I know her reasons, I can sympathise with her, but I can't say the same for you. So tell me." You paused to take a deep breath. "Why?"

"I'm not good at riddles, I'm sorry." Karen said, looking genuinely apologetic.

"It's okay, Karen, Gretchen can answer for you both."

"She deserves it." Gretchen said, steel in her tone.

"You sound just like Cady Heron and Janis 'Imi'ike. She hurt them too. What do you think ruining her life will achieve?"

"I'll be the new Regina George."

"Do you hear yourself? You still idolize her. If you're gonna be the new Regina George, it's always going to be a Regina George world. Don't you want to be Gretchen Wieners?"

"No!" She screeched. "Gretchen Wieners is lame, boring, too eager, a slut, desperate-" She took a deep breath.

"Okay." You said. "Why? Because Regina said so? Why would you believe her? She's just the same as you. Look," You pulled the album back out.

"Here we're in the Georges' pool. She would not go to the deep end. Y'know, she refused to even go in without those arm floaties for the longest time. Eventually, some boy made fun of her for them and that was the last time.

"And in this one we're driving back from summer camp. Regina was already tall enough to go without a booster seat, but I wasn't. She'd just thrown the biggest tantrum 'cause Mrs George didn't allow her to take off her seatbelt to sleep. She went out like a light, anyway.

"We're in Six Flags there. We'd just gotten those ice creams and you can see that Regina's isn't sticking to the cone all that well. Right after the shot, it just slid off. Regina was inconsolable. I offered her mine so we could share, and that seemed to be good enough for her but her dad was not having it. He threatened to take us home if she didn't stop crying right then, that it'd be all her fault that their whole family wasted money and time on this stupid trip. Eventually she calmed down and Mr George didn't have to drive us back."

You sighed. "I already tried this with Janis, in a way. I don't think Regina would appreciate me airing out her personal life like this, but... I don't know..." You closed your eyes for a moment. "I just want people to stop making things worse for her. She's been so wrong for so long, and I know I can't keep defending her, but I just don't think revenge will make her regret anything that she's done."

Karen hummed. "My auntie's been teaching me about karma. So, like, if she feels what she's made others feel, then won't that like... Fix her?"

"I don't want to hurt her." You said, resolute. "Maybe, it could be the most effective way to make her see her shortcomings. But I don't want to. I do not want to hurt her." You looked between the two. "And that's where we differ, I guess."

Gretchen didn't say anything, eyes glued to a picture from the Six Flags trip. Regina had mustard and ketchup smeared all over her face while she was holding a napkin to your lips, in the process of wiping your face.

With that, you snatched the album from her hands, deposited it back into the locker and slammed it shut. The lock clicked. Without a word, you began to talk towards the exit. Neither of them followed you or said anything to you.

You couldn't stop people from taking their revenge. You had done your best to be diplomatic. Evoking sympathy in hormonal teenagers wasn't something easily done, or maybe you were just shitty at it, but there was little else you could do. If you went ahead and retaliated, hurt them for hurting someone you cared about, the lines blurred.

You'd just be another mean girl.

Notes: Sorry for the delay! The next chapter will be the last one, unless I start rambling or something. After that, I'll do a less structured series of epilogues. Loosely related oneshots, that kinda vibe.

Also, my writing assistant stopped working in the middle of this, so if there's stupid typos I'll come fix them later.

I swear to fucking god if the taglist doesn't work I'll start breaking bones.

Taglist: @autorasexy, @wedfan2, @unadulterated-moron, @modernsapphicism , @9unknown0 , @sage-rose2000 , @massive-honkas , @nattys-swiftie , @likefirenrain , @luz-enjoyer , @dandelions4us , @natashamaximoff-69 , @alexkolax , @jareaul0ver , @here4theqts , @charleeeesworld , @natsbiggestfan1 , @brocoliisscared , @yellowwallflowers , @scarlettbitchx , @ayoungexwife , @cyberbonesworld , @syddie-reads , @screechcat , @theenglishswiftie , @gabby-duhh , @sweetmissnothing , @masterofpuppets-10 , @l1lass , @starved-mortal , @nothanksbye07 , @nenas19 , @jvuyii , @starry-night17 , @reneeswife24 , @glorioushamsterqueen , @krononan , @slug-on-bike , @rayisaknight , @chaseatlanticlover91 , @reginassweetheart , @mirage018

(this actually makes me angry. why. why doesnt it work. i type in the @ and then i type in the name and then it shows up in the lil' box and i click it but then it don't show up ;-;)

(this is cyber bullying. the cybers are bullying me.)

(anyway, if you want to be added to the taglist there is no gurantee if it'll work, but i'll add you if you want! just comment on this post :) if anybody has any ideas why it's like this, lmk!)

#mean girls #mean girls 2004 #mean girls 2024 #regina george #regina george x reader #regina george x you #regina george x oc #regina george x ofc #mean girls x reader #lesbian regina george #wlw #fic: yard work

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imjustania · 5 months

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How to nail 💅your Essays

No matter if you’re in university or school, you will need to write a research paper. Now this post will be dedicated to a normal essay structure, if you need to write an essay based assignment on medical, biological, chemical, or any other science, you need to be more specific, as writing a lab report has a couple extra steps.

Now, you have an essay due in two weeks? A week? Tonight? I’ve been there and I share your pain. I am currently in my last year in university studying for bachelor degree in Marketing, and oh boy let me tell you, the amount of essays I had to write was unreal. Therefore, let me share with you some of my essays skills, to help your speed run your own assignment.

Step 1: OUTLINE IT!?

Ok i think so many of you out there are missing this step. You cant expect yourself to sit in front of the computer and start typing away your essay? No you cant do that. You need to spend a good amount of time sitting down and outlining your essay. Figure out what goes where, and what sources to use for each section. Luckily for you, you have me here to tell you the basic outline structure of every essay. It consists of the:

Table of content (depends on how professional your essay is asked for)

Introduction

Main body

Conclusion

… THATS IT! Only 4 sections (and a half) to write your essay. However of course there is more to write then just that. Lets break down those sections

1) Introduction: When writing the introduction for your essay, it's important to start off with a bang! You want to give your readers a glimpse of what's to come and hook their attention right from the beginning. Make sure to include a strong thesis statement that clearly states the main argument or purpose of your essay. To make it even more engaging, you can provide some background information about the topic and give a brief outline of the main points you'll be discussing in your essay. Therefore, every introduction should have an hook, explanation what you’re writing, what you think will be the result or what is the point you’re writing your essay, and outline all the points of the main body (but simplify them)

2) Main body: In each section of your essay, it's important to provide a detailed analysis and offer supporting evidence for the points you introduced at the beginning. Take each paragraph as a chance to present a single main idea or argument and support it with enough evidence, examples, or citations to back up your claim. To make sure your ideas flow smoothly, use clear and logical transitions between paragraphs. Lastly, remember to give credit to your sources and include proper references for any external information you include in your essay. Here are some side tips for you

Try to have at least a minimum of 3 main body paragraphs . Each paragraph should have one point which helps support your main hypothesis or reasons or this essay.

Each essay will have different main bodies, depending on the subject. Sometimes your main bodies will be dedicated to presenting information about your topic. So for example, as a marketer, I had to write many reports. Most reports written will always include a main analysis of the company (so SWOT, PESTEL, Stakeholder analysis, mission and vision of the company, etc). Depending on what the essay require you to do, you should consider to present your points in that order.

Even your main body should have a proper structure of introduction, main points, and the conclusion.

Don’t forget to have a proper in-text citations depending on which format you use.

3) Conclusion: A conclusion is a chance to wrap up your essay by summarizing the main points and restating the thesis statement. Remember not to introduce any new information here; instead, provide a concise summary of the arguments you've made throughout your essay. Furthermore, this is your chance to leave a lasting impression on your reader by offering insights, implications, or recommendations related to the topic. A well-written conclusion should leave your reader with a sense of closure and a clear understanding of the importance of your essay's content.

4) References: The references section of your essay is where you list all the sources you have cited or referenced. It's important because it helps readers find and verify the credibility of the sources you used. When writing the references section, make sure to follow the specific citation style required by your institution or professor, such as APA, MLA, or Chicago style. Include the author's name, publication year (if there is no publication year, then the article must not be reliable. It must always have a year), title of the source, publication information, and any other required details. Arrange the references alphabetically by the author's last name or by the title if there is no author (if there is no author try using the organisation or the website that published the text). Don't forget to double-check the formatting and punctuation for accuracy and consistency throughout the references section.

After your essay was outlines and you know exactly what you’re supposed to write… write it dude? Like you have the format, you have the sources, and you know your points. Just start writing… if you are having trouble getting started, then give a click to another one of my blogs on how to actually get started on studying.

If you want to go the extra mile, and also make the essay more professional here are some of my personal tips to accomplish that:

size 12 for normal text and size 14 for title (titles can be only bold)

Use text Times New Roman (ROMAN EMPIREEEEEEEEEE)

Double space of all essay

Have a cover page! You can find templates in the insert section of the word tabs.

Have numbers tag the foot of the page

And thats all for today folks! Hope this is actually useful to you, and if you are struggling with anything specific, then do let me know in the comment section or send me a question through the tumblr! Now thank you for reading, and leaving likes <3 don't forget to smile, because you’re beautiful.

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lunaofthevalley · 6 years

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The Letter

Sebastian Stan x Reader.

Plot: You're leaving behind your life in New York to go to Austria, and that means leaving him behind as well. But you couldn't leave with certain things left unsaid, so you wrote them down.

Request: @hadesgirl1015

Warnings: none

Note: I'm backkkkkkk wooooooo. Finally got out of that writers block.

The world seemed to be nonexistent to you at that moment. The only things you were really registering were the soft sounds of the raindrops hitting the pavement outside and the pieces of paper before you on which black ink seemed to be scribbled across like a never ending flurry of emotions.

And that's exactly what it was.

You sat unmoving, just looking across the now empty loft, a place which before used to have color and warmth, now only seemed bland and empty.

It's pretty amazing how a place filled with memories and stories can be stripped of that in a blink of an eye.

A knock suddenly sounded on the door, and that's what made you snap out of whatever mood you were in and back into the real world.

Before you went to open the door you quickly shoved the inked paper into an envelope and quickly wrote the name of the person to whom it was addressed on the front. You then shoved the envelope in your purse, going to grab your luggage before walking to the door.

Opening it up you were met with the cool breeze of the hallway, but also with blue stormy eyes that seemed to match the weather outside.

"You ready?" He asked in a soft tone.

You could only reply with a nod, taking one last glance at what had been your home for the last few years, before walking out and closing the door, leaving behind the first of three things you didn't want to.

Sebastian let out a deep sigh, before helping you with your luggage and walking towards the elevator. As you waited neither of you said a thing. It wasn't needed. You had known each other so long that sometimes long silences said more than what a full conversation would. You were that comfortable with one another, and it was something you would miss terribly.

Before you knew it you were already on the ground floor, walking towards Sebastian's car. He had offered to drive you to the airport, knowing that you, when moments like these came about, disconnected yourself from your surroundings, becoming more like an empty vessel, unlike your usual go happy, cheery self.

Things seemed to go by in a blur, as if your life was suddenly in fast forward. One moment your loading your things into the car and taking one last look at your home, and then your suddenly driving through the busy streets of New York City, the buildings going by in a blur, blurrier than usual thanks to the droplets of water that glided against the window.

You still really had no idea how the decision had come about. One day your happy, enjoying the hustle and bustle of New York City, the chaos and fast life it brought with it, and suddenly you dont want that anymore, opting to move somewhere else, far away, almost as if you were running away from something, which in a way, you were.

You couldn't choose at first. You didn't want to live in a big city anymore, you wanted to experience something different, the countryside maybe? A small town a couple of hours outside a city? You ended up choosing to go to Austria, a nice little picturesque town by the mountains, a place which seemed frozen in time, something so completely different to the place you were running away from.

Soft tunes played lowly on the radio, blending with the soft sounds of the falling water. You didn't remember the name of the song playing, but you knew it was one that sounded often, which is why, from now on, every time you heard it you would remember this moment, crossing the bridge, leaving Manhattan, leaving behind the second thing you truly didn't want to.

As every second passed, you got closer to the airport, meaning you were just a minute closer to saying goodbye to a very important part of your life. Your heart started to pick up, getting faster every minute that passed. Your stomach started feeling funny, like it would usually feel before you went to do a presentation in college or when you got up to sing at a karaoke bar while still being sober.

The scenery blended together and soon enough you were parked right outside the airport. Sebastian and you sat silent, unmoving, both enclosed inside the safe space of his jaguar.

He was the first to break the silence. "You have everything?"

You nodded, "Pretty sure I do. If I did forget anything at all you can always send it through the mail."

He let out a soft chuckle, "That I can do, I guess."

Things went back to being silent. It was comfortable though. Some people didn't like it when things were that way, no words being spoken, but for you and him, it was welcomed.

After a few minutes had passed you turned back to face him. "Seb…I think it's best if I go in alone."

He turned his head to you quickly, his mouth opened slightly as if he was going to say something, but no sound came out.

"It's just…it's difficult enough already, and if you go in with me I'll be more of a mess than I'll be now. So please let me do this alone." You explained, "look, I know you probably think it's a dumb idea, since I won't be seeing you in god knows how long, but I think it's the best thing to do."

After a couple seconds Sebastian only nodded, knowing that you had already made up your mind on the matter, and that no matter what argument he used, you wouldn't be changing it.

"…at least let me help you unload your bags."

"Yeah, that'd be great."

Both of you got out of the car, Sebastian going towards the trunk, while you went to get a cart to help you move your things towards baggage registration. Once everything was loaded securely to the cart you turned to Sebastian, not wasting one more moment before engulfing him as close as you could.

He hugged you back, lifting you slightly of the ground, making you stand on your toes, his arms securely around your waist, while yours were around his neck. Your emotions started getting the best of you, making some tears escape your eyes. You could feel Sebastian become emotional too, feeling a wetness on your shoulders that you knew didn't come from the sky.

You both separated after a while, both with red, puffy eyes and slightly runny noses.

"God I'll miss you so much. Why do you have to leave New York?" Why do you have to leave me, Sebastian expressed, although that last statement was only thought.

You sighed, "I don't know Seb, I can't give you a specific reason. I just know it's something I need to do. But hey, I'll come visit, and I'm sure you'll go visit me after some time, maybe your work will take you there, then we can live out our childhood dream of singing the sound of music on a hillside," Seb let out a laugh at that, remember ing it was something you had talked about during middle school when you were set to perform the musical. "I need time away, just for a little while. You're not completely losing me, okay."

He could only respond with a nod.

"I have to go now…"

"I know. Send me a text when you're on the plane, and if you can't, just call when you land."

"Will do Seb," you were about to leave when you remembered the envelope in your bag. You took it out and held it out to him, "I…um…I wrote this for you, but please read it when you get back home."

Seb nodded as he took the letter, "So this is it then?"

"Yeah, it is."

"See you later Y/N."

You smiled before softly replying, "Catch you later, Stan."

_________________________

It had been around 25 minutes since you had disappeared through the automatic doors of the airport entrance, and Sebastian remained sat in his car, staring off at nothing while thinking of everything.

You had told him not to read the letter, but he needed to know what the contents of that envelope were, so against his better judgment he opened it and took out the frail pieces of paper that contained all your thoughts and feelings.

Hey Seb,

I hope you listened to me when I told you to read this at home. But I know you, so you're either still parked outside the airport, or you stopped at some point between Manhattan and JFK to read it because curiosity got the better of you.

For you're sake I hope it's the second.

To be honest with you, I don't really know why I'm writing this. Maybe it's to help me feel better about myself? Or maybe it's just an easier way to say things without truly saying them, if you get what I mean.

I guess it's easier to write what you feel and have someone read it, instead of actually having to say it out loud and be met with their either negative or positive response. So I think I just answered my own question.

I'm writing this so I don't have to say it to you, because god it frightens me so much what you might think, how you might react.

There's so many different outcomes to you reading this, you might hate me, you might think I'm strange, you might think it's good riddance, or maybe, just maybe, you might feel the same and kind of still hate me for what I did.

And by what I did I mean, write this letter and give it to you right before I board a plane to Austria.

And what I mean by you feeling all those posible emotions is because I, Y/N Y/L/N am complete and utterly in love with you Sebastian Stan, I have been for years now. I just never had the courage to actually tell you.I was afraid of what would happen if I did.

You have your career and you're loved by so many and you could be with whoever you wanted to, which you have been, that's another reason why I didn't tell you, I felt like I could never live up to be what would be expected of me if I were to be with you.

But never mind that now.

I know it's selfish of me to do this. Specially now, considering the circumstances. You've probably figured it out by this point, that you were one of the reasons as to why I left. And I'm so, so sorry for putting you in this position.

I've had to leave behind the three things I treasured most in this world. My small loft in Soho, where so many great moments were lived. New York City, my home, the one place I can always count on. And you Sebastian, the person I love most in this world.

I know this letter might change things for us in the future, our friendship might not be what it used to be. But I don't regret for one moment writing this letter. I couldn't leave without telling you-or well writing it to you.

Again, I so sorry for doing this to you. I love you.

Y/N

Sebastián didn't know what to do, so he did what his instinct told him to, and that was get out of the car and run to you. Your flight left at 6:00, it was currently 5:29, if he ran fast enough he could make it. But first he had to figure out what gate you would be at.

He ran as fast as he could, running in between people, trying not to bump into them, stopping every now and again to ask where your gate was.

It was 5:56 by the time he had gotten to the gate, and he looked around but he didn't see you anywhere.

He ran up to a woman who sat behind the desk were the entrance to your plane was.

"Excuse me ma'am, is this the gate for flight 482 to Vienna?" He asked rapidly.

The woman gave him a fake smile, "It is. But I'm afraid the plane has already left. It's on the tarmac already. Were you a passenger of the flight?"

Sebastian's shoulders dropped. He had been too late. If he had only read the letter 10 minutes earlier you might not have gotten on that plane. But you were gone now. And so was his chance to tell you he loved you.

"No, it's just. I had something to tell someone."

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