#when he immediately knew to trust cassian… | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

steveslevis · 1 month

Text

i love you, it’s ruining my life

azriel x cassian’s sister!reader - part 1 of 3

summary: it wasn’t supposed to be like this. you weren’t supposed to be your brother’s best friend’s mate, especially when that best friend is the same male who’s acted like you don’t exist for the last two centuries.

warnings: angst, very brief mentions of violence and abuse, azriel is oblivious and reader is angry, not much pining in this part mainly just angsty

A single band of golden thread, stretched from your soul, reaching out into an abyss. There was seemingly no end to the thread, no definite stop, just a shadowy mess that sent the thread into a disarray as it reached for your mate.

Your mate. The male who had spoken maybe a full sentence to you a handful of times in the last few centuries. The male who was best friends with your brother, and acted as if you didn’t even exist.

Even in your younger years in Windhaven, it seemed Azriel didn’t even know you were there. Like you were a ghost, invisible to him in every sense of the word.

Azriel didn’t ever really speak to anyone, though, so it wasn’t like you were an exception, he treated you like most everyone else. But you never had been able to shake the fact that he would nearly sprint out of a room if you were the only one in it, or that he would refuse to look you in the eyes when you spoke at dinner. It was like he couldn’t even stand the thought of being in the same vicinity of you, like he couldn’t stomach talking to you.

And you were now bound to him, for the rest of eternity.

The bond had snapped for you immediately upon seeing the state of Azriel when they returned from Hybern without Feyre, when the entirety of their plan had gone up in flames, with Azriel in the main path of destruction.

Seeing him in so much pain tugged at your heart, nearly ripping it out of your chest when you saw how ruined his wings were. It affected you so much that you ran out of the room when they first arrived, partially because of how much it hurt you to see him like that, and partially because of how distraught the bond snapping into place had immediately made you feel. You couldn’t bear to see your mate in so much pain, and you knew you didn’t trust yourself to be around when they inevitably put him into more pain while healing him.

You kept to yourself for weeks after their arrival, only speaking to Rhysand and your brother when need be.

Rhys was the first one to find out about your dilemma.

He called you into his study weeks later to talk about a mission, one he needed you specifically on for your daemati skills. While he explained the details, he could tell your mind was elsewhere, so much so that you couldn’t even stop him from getting past the pure obsidian wall you’d built up in your mind, the wall you never let anyone break down until that moment.

Rhysand had given you a hesitant look when he stopped explaining the tasks in order to peer into your mind and capture your attention. He didn’t want to pry, only to get your mind focused by scaling his talon down the obsidian wall, which to his surprise collapsed before he could even attempt to breach it. But you nodded when he silently asked to see what had been keeping you so on edge, what had stopped you from helping Madja out with taking care of Azriel when they returned from Hybern, what had stopped you from engaging in conversation at dinner as of late.

A vision of a golden thread shrouded in black and gray shadows was sent to Rhys’ mind, along with a memory of exactly the moment you had been struck with the bond.

“Have you told him?” he implored, though he seemed to already know the answer.

You couldn’t even speak at that point, only shaking your head in response as tears brimmed your eyes when you thought of how fucked up it was to be bonded to someone who’d barely acknowledged you in the hundreds of years you’d known him.

Rhys gave you a sympathetic look then, knowing the feeling of an unrequited bond all too well.

You promised him about a thousand times that you wouldn’t let him find out, that you wouldn’t let the agony and sadness get in the way of the mission. You could prove yourself worthy and able to go on without thinking about how you might never get an accepted bond, you assured him that you could. He was still unsure when he agreed to let you go on the mission, but it was miniscule enough that any lapses in judgment wouldn’t be detrimental, so he agreed.

And you proved yourself, just like you said you would. You proved yourself over and over again with Rhysand’s missions, building up your mental shields stronger than they ever had been before. So strong, that the High Lord himself had a hard time cracking through them.

You became a shell of what you were before seeing your mate in that near-death state, but you didn’t care. You needed to distract yourself in any way, shape or form that you could in order to forget about him, to forget that he’d never even taken a second glance in your direction.

It got to the point where you became so shut off from reality that even Cassian, your brother known for paying no mind to female emotions, started to notice.

You caught Cassian giving you inquisitive stares a handful of times during training and at dinners when your attitude was exceptionally reserved and demure, but never thought he would actually say anything to you.

That was until he finally snapped, on the first dinner with Feyre back in Velaris, which just so happened to be the first dinner that Azriel joined in the weeks after Hybern.

You nearly fell out of your seat when you saw him in all his glory. There he was, standing at the end of the table, as beautiful as ever. He was almost fully healed, aside from a few scars littered over the membrane of his wings.

Excited chatter filled the room as he entered, everyone falling into their rightful place in the Inner Circle, along with the newest members, Nesta and Elain. Though you were one of the longest standing members of Rhysand’s Inner Circle, you felt the most out of place in that moment.

The wine you’d been sipping churned in your stomach as you eyed the shadowsinger, who was sitting quietly across the table from you. You couldn’t handle it, knowing that he was your mate and he had no clue. You couldn’t stomach the thought of him finding out, of him potentially rejecting the bond.

After a moment of silently wallowing in your self pity, you felt that familiar talon scrape along your mental shield. Rhys was requesting access to your mind, likely to give you some insight about this unrequited feeling based on his own experience.

You rejected his request instead of letting him in, shooting him a quick glance before standing up abruptly, quietly excusing yourself with the reasoning that you weren’t feeling well.

You rushed up the stairs, toward your bedroom all the while feeling like you were drowning. You needed air, fresh air, now. It was in that moment that you thanked the Cauldron for Rhysand putting you in the bedroom with a large balcony, one perfect for moments like this.

Little did you know, your brother had stalked up the stairs behind you, worried after seeing the panic-stricken look on your face before bolting from the room.

You didn’t bother to close your bedroom door behind you, leaving Cassian the perfect opportunity to come in to check on you. You were out on the balcony in an instant, nearly gasping for air as the cool night breeze hit your face.

“Hey,” Cassian called behind you, standing awkwardly in the middle of your bedroom. “You alright?”

“I don’t want to talk right now, Cass.” you retort quickly, shooting a glare in his direction before leaning over the metal railing as he furrows his brow. “I obviously don’t feel great at the moment.”

“Yeah, no shit. But that doesn’t warrant you snapping at me when all I’m doing is coming to check on you,” he presses, taking a step onto the balcony to stand by you. “It doesn’t warrant you ignoring me for fucking weeks now.”

“What do you want me to say, Cassian?” you snap, throwing your hands up in defeat. “I—I don’t really know what kind of explanation you need from me, I just haven’t been in a talking mood these last few weeks.”

“Oh, bullshit.” he says, shaking his head at you. “I see you chatting with Rhys and Mor all the fucking time. You’re only shutting me out. What the fuck did I do?”

You take a moment to look up at your brother, finally seeing the hurt sketched across his features as he pleads with you, trying desperately to get through to you.

“You didn’t do anything.” you sigh, letting your guard down as you realize how much you’d hurt your twin in the last few weeks. “I—I just am going through some shit right now.”

“It’s nothing I can’t handle.” he says, nudging your arm with his elbow as a relieved but hesitant smile passes over his face. “I’m always here to lend an ear.”

“Are you sure?” you say, voice cracking as you internally accept that you’re about to change everything in Cassian’s life with four simple words.

“Positive.” Cassian says, smile still on his face as he grips your shoulder to reassure you.

“Azriel is my mate.” you say bluntly, watching in silent terror as your brother’s face falls and so does his hand from your shoulder. “And he has no idea.”

——————————————————————

That was almost two years ago.

Cassian took the news quite well, and became your biggest supporter when it came to dealing with the hardships of an unrequited mating bond. Even as he dealt with his own unrequited bond for a short amount of time, he still made sure to make it known that he still cared for and understood the pain you were going through.

And now that the war against Hybern had been won, you could focus all your energy into training and missions Rhys would send you on.

Rhysand knew you preferred to be sent on solo missions, that you worked better alone without anyone disrupting your focus. But, there were some missions that couldn’t be done alone.

“You–This is a joke, right?” you say with a laugh, narrowing your eyes at the High Lord who sat across the desk in his office, raising his eyebrow at you as you laugh. “I work alone, Rhys.”

“I know you work best alone, but sometimes I can’t send you alone,” Rhys starts, giving you a sharp glare as you start to stand from your chair, “I can’t send you alone, not on this one.”

“Why?” you pressed, pushing off the arms of your chair to move closer to the desk. “You haven’t even told me what I’m doing or where I’ll be going yet, so why should I even agree to it without knowing?”

The look the High Lord was giving you made you uneasy, turning your stomach in knots, but you persisted. You needed him to stop treating you like you were made of glass, like you would break, like you hadn’t been training with Cassian since you could stand.

“I’m not a child anymore, Rhys.” you snapped, hands balling into fists as they pressed against the oak of his large desk. “I can handle whatever it is, without Azriel babysitting me.”

“I really don’t know–”

“Are you trying to torture me?” you interject, a pained expression crossing over your face, one of betrayal at the feeling of one of your longest friends trying to put you in such an uncomfortable position when he knows exactly what you’ve been dealing with over the last two years. “Are you trying to make me suffer, do you want me to –”

“I need you to go to Windhaven.” Rhys finally commanded, voice wavering slightly as he brought up the place you once called home, the place he knew would send you regressing into a lesser version of yourself. “I need you to go there, with Azriel.”

The mention of Windhaven sent a shiver down your spine, wings twitching in fear as you thought about the horrors you endured in your final years at the camp. Your sharp gaze flickered for a split second, mind running back to that cabin, to the flash of wings and clawing hands, to the male who did irreparable damage to your soul, to the moment you swore you’d never let a male hurt you again. With a shake of your head, you block the thoughts out, pressing that black obsidian wall back up to prevent yourself from breaking.

“I’ll be fine on my own.” you say, putting your stern persona back into place, trying to make it seem as though you’re unbothered.

“I need to send him with you, someone needs to watch your back.” he insists while shaking his head as his gaze softens, trying to get you to break from your hardened facade.

“What about Cass?” you retort, shaking your head.

“He’ll be in Spring, he’s got business with Tamlin and Eris to attend to for me.” he quickly replies, shaking his own head. “Please, I need you to do this.”

“I–I can’t.”

“Is the thought of being alone with me for two days that bad?” a voice comes from behind you, nearly making you jump out of your skin.

Your mate, just the person you didn’t want to see right now.

You whip around quickly at the sound of his voice, brow furrowed as you see him standing in the doorway. It takes everything in you not to sigh at the sight of him, at how damn good he looked, just standing there. You cursed yourself internally, wishing you could think about anything else besides how much you pined for him. Still, you had an image to uphold, an image of distaste for the beautiful shadowsinger standing in front of you.

“Oh, that’s rich coming from you, shadowsinger.” you snap, shooting a glare in his direction that sends a pang of guilt running down the one-sided bond.

“I’m sorry?” he questions, raising an eyebrow at you, his face the poster child for cool composure as your rage boils in front of him.

“You can barely stand to be in the same room for me for more than five minutes,” you state, crossing your arms matter-of-factly. “You quite literally leave any space in the house when I’m the only other person around.”

The thought of your mate, the one who was supposed to be at your side for all of eternity, leaving the room any time you entered made your blood boil and chest ache. You ached for him, you ached to feel his touch, to be loved by him. But he didn’t care about you, didn’t care if you lived or died.

Seeing the anger in your eyes made Azriel stop in his tracks, something unfamiliar tugging at his heart as you seethed. There was a gnawing feeling in his chest as he thought about the last five hundred years, how he never paid you any mind.

The truth was, he avoided you with every bit of willpower he had in order to restrain himself. He couldn’t be around you for more than a few moments without your overpowering scent filling his nose feeding his desire to tear you apart. Every time he was with you alone, he wanted to tear down any walls that he had and just have at you, to have you as his. He wanted you carnally, he wanted all of you, all of the time.

But that wasn’t the kind of male he was. He would never do such a thing to Cassian, his best friend. He couldn’t let himself have you just to fulfill his deepest desires, you deserved so much more than to be some one night fling. You deserved to be loved and cared for, to be protected at all costs.

So he had ignored you, for almost five fucking centuries, because he thought he couldn’t give you what you deserved. He pushed out any thought he had about you, pushed away the urge to pursue you in any way, and pushed you away in the process. He knew you well from watching from afar, but to you it seemed as though you were the last thought in his mind, when in reality, you were the only thought in his mind at all times.

“That’s not–” Azriel started, but the words fell on his lips as he watched your own pull into a frown, an expression that was much more broken than the anger that had crossed over your face when he snuck in.

“Yeah, that’s what I fucking thought, you prick.” you said weakly, finally letting your emotions get the better of you. As tears pricked your eyes, you turned to Rhys once more. “I will not be going anywhere with him. I will be going by myself, or not at all. I am strong enough to do this on my own and I’m tired of being treated like a child in this court.”

Rhys only stared at you as you stalked towards the desk once again, watching as your hands shook with pain. He showed no change in emotion as you spoke, fully in High Lord mode instead of the Rhysand you knew and loved.

“I will be in my room, packing. When you’re done being a stubborn male and realize that I can do whatever the hell it is you need me to do, I’ll be waiting for further instructions.” you state, trying to choke back the tears that are threatening to flow onto the wood in front of your hands.

The High Lord nods firmly in response, and you turn on your heels. Azriel is still standing in the doorway, but you don’t dare to look at him. You push past the shadowsinger, swiping your cheeks hastily as tears fall down them. As you pass, your wing brushes his in the lightest of touches. You swallow a gasp as they touch, a shockwave flowing through your wing and going straight to your heart.

Azriel turns to gaze at you with wide eyes and you immediately know he felt it too. He felt the shock, the electricity between your wings, but not in the way you did. Not down the one-sided, golden bond that stretched toward him.

Confusion spread over his face as he looked at you, but you turned away and rushed towards your room before he could fully process what happened.

The rest of your afternoon was spent alone in your room, laying on your bed for most of the night as you stared up at the ceiling. You cursed yourself internally over and over again, wishing there were some way to change everything, some way to make you forget that you even had a mate.

Over and over again, you told yourself how you weren’t worthy of the immeasurable love that came with a mate, how you would never be good enough for Azriel.

It had always been like that for you, though. The feeling of inadequacy was a daily occurrence for you, it wasn’t a secret. Cassian knew it, and so did Rhysand, so you’re sure Azriel did too. You worked day in and day out trying to prove that you were worthy to your brother and the High Lord and everyone around you, regardless of the pain you put yourself in.

Rhysand knew you too well, and knew that you were all too serious about going on the mission by yourself, or at least without Azriel. After you left his office, he’d tried to speak to Cassian about accompanying you, but it was of no use, he was preoccupied. He didn’t want you to go by yourself, he knew you’d be scared just by being in Windhaven again, but he also knew that you being the one to go on this mission was the only hope.

Your untraceable daemati skills were an impeccable weapon that couldn’t be replaced by Azriel’s shadows or Cassian’s brute force. Even the High Lord himself didn’t have daemati powers as stealthful as yours, so you were the best option when it came to figuring out who was trying to rebel.

After much contemplation, Rhys eventually sent a concise and firm message to your mind.

I need you in Windhaven by dinner tonight, Devlon will be expecting you to be there. There are a few Illyrians that I need you to check in on while you’re there, Cass told me there are talks of rebellion led by Cormac and Bavlard. he explained, you should only need to be there for tonight to gather enough information, but plan to stay until tomorrow evening in case we need more intel. You’ll stay in the cabin as usual, I’ll be in contact regularly to check on you, since you’ll be on your own this time.

The last sentence had a smile flickering on your lips, happy that Rhysand was finally taking you seriously as a member of his Inner Circle and trusting you enough to send you on missions by yourself. Luckily, you were already packed so it didn’t take much for you to get ready to go.

In less than an hour, you were dressed in your fighting leathers and on the balcony of your room. You waste no time in flying from the house, large wings spreading for the first time in what feels like forever as you make for the sky.

The breeze against your skin makes you sigh with joy, trying to enjoy the twinge of happiness that flying gives you as you make your way towards the place you once called home, the place you now call hell.

taglist: @paleidiot @tothestarsandwhateverend @impossibelle

#azriel #azriel x reader #azriel shadowsinger #acotar #azriel angst #azriel x you

2K notes · View notes

feyreswaterybowels · 2 months

Text

⭒The Silent One⭒

#1 Azriel x Fem!OC

⭒Part 1⭒Part 2⭒Part 3⭒Part 4⭒

Word Count: 4k

Summary: Velaris was home to many pleasure houses but when the high lord learns the owners of these houses aren’t abiding bu long reigning laws he and his inner circle steps in—in the process taking in an Illyrian female that had been abused and tormented.

Warnings/Tags: mute character. slow burn romance. trauma. sexual abuse. found family. building romance/trust after trauma. violence. strong female character. protective!azriel. protective!IC.

Authors Note: All likes, re blogs and comments are welcome, appreciated and highly encouraged! Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tag list for the next part! Bold italics are mental communication, regular italics are inner thoughts.

⋆ ݁⟡ ݁☾ ݁⟡ ݁⋆

The smell of smoke was thick in the air. The floor was wet, the air moist and chilled. The building Azriel and Cassian just entered was one of the many pleasure houses in Velaris. This was no ordinary visit for pleasure. No. They were on a mission per their High Lord’s command.

The Velvet Pearl was a pleasure house where those who entered could pay for sexual services. Men and women alike were welcome and the Pearl was known to have anything a person was looking for—whether that be a specific species, body type, hair color, skin color or a specific act. It could all be found here. The Mistresses made it their job to comb through the streets looking for those who would enjoy the work.

That’s what led their mission here tonight. Pleasure houses are no secret in Velaris. They are out in the open. There can be one found for many vices. Gambling, dancing, drinking and of course sex. There aren’t many rules for these houses by the High Lords command, but a big one had been broken recently.

Consent.

The law of consent in these pleasure houses is major, one of the most important to the High Lord, Rhysand, and the ones before him. One cannot force another to drink. One cannot force another to gamble. Once cannot force another into sexual acts. Any person visiting or working at these establishments must be there of their own free will.

With the pleasure houses specifically this rule had been broken when one of Azriel’s spies fled into Rhysand office, informing him of many pleasure houses buying fae citizens off of families who needed money. The high lord was shocked, they hadn’t had any issues like this in centuries. He immediately summoned his inner circle looking to them for advice.

That’s how Azriel and Cassian ended up here now. They, and a few other soldiers, were to patrol the pleasure houses for the next few night. Look and listen for any signs that confirm the information given to them.

The Velvet Pearl was a very niche business. A large luxurious building, mirrors lined the outside walls reflecting the beauty of Velaris on the outside. The inside however was lined and decorated in blacks, red, green and golds. The lights were low and colorful. A huge bar with various types of wines, liquors, spirits and beers. They always had heavy music playing. Poles and stages for the workers to dance on. On the upper most floors were doors lining the walls. Private rooms that could be paid for and used for the services.

However, the luxury ended when one entered the Dungeon as they called it. A fitting name for the place they had just entered. The place where one picked their partner for the night. Caged cells lined the room and sat atop one another zig-zagging around the room like a maze. Males and females, mostly lesser fae but some high fae as well, a few different species. All naked. All pressed against the bars of their enclosures. Heavy lidded eyes trained on the two massive Illyrian warriors before them. Reaching out to touch, but not actually touching, they all knew better than to touch anyone who doesn’t explicitly ask for it. Some of them, however, touched one another through the bars, enticing a buyer to take them both for the night.

“I’m really good at wing play, I’ll make you cum in less than a minute,” A pretty fae, purred. Lesser fae Azriel noted, long dark hair curled around her perky breasts, skin a dark blue with eyes to match. She was definitely attractive.

“Sorry, I prefer it to last a little longer than that,” Cassian winked at her, getting a giggle in return. Azriel rolled his eyes but a barely there grin that only his brother would notice played on his lips.

They continued on. Looking at every fae in the room. Analyzing them, reading their body language making sure they truly wanted to be here. These fae, as they should, all seem to love their job. That’s how it should be. It’s when they got to the end of the line, nearly out of the room that things took a turn.

A cell that was previously empty was now occupied by a female and a mistress—mistresses only accompanied new workers. A snap echoed through the space and the two warriors shared a look before walking over. Both hiding their shock at the sight in front of them.

There pressed against the back of the cage was a female, not just any female though. Her eyes were wide as she watched them approach. Eyes scanning their wings, siphons and weapons. Pushing herself into the corner and trying to cover her nakedness with her hands. Another snap echoed, her hands dropping to the side as she cried out when the mistress struck her thigh again.

“No need for that,” Azriel growled. His shadows raced around him, curling around his ear to whisper to him.

Glamor. The female is glamored. They hiss.

He gave Cassian a side eye before locking eyes with the mistress.

“Remove her glamor,” Azriel ordered. The mistress blanched, eyes wide in shock.

“I don’t know what you’re—”

“Do we need to tell Thane you don’t know how to follow orders?” Cassian snarled. She gave a meek head shake.

“As you wish,” She said before waving her hand, the glamor shimmering away leaving both men there shocked at the sight in front of them.

Azriel heard Cassian's intake of breath. Hidden behind that glamor was a pair of Illyrian wings, bound behind her in a way that was obviously very uncomfortable with the way they twitched and shifted in their bindings.

“Remove her binding as well. Do you know what can happen to Illyrian wings if they stay bound like that?” Cassian said, arms crossing over his chest in an attempt to not rip the bars from the cage. The bound female looks between the two men, cautious and weary as the Mistress narrows her eyes.

“She’s unclipped and doesn’t know how to control them. We bound them so she doesn’t hurt herself or someone else,” the Mistress explained, but it wasn’t the right answer to give.

“Unbind her now,” Azriel ordered, his voice a booming echo in the room, it was not a question. The Mistress understood that tone, turning to the female, grabbing her roughly and turning her. She cut the rope and the wings instantly sagged, finding relief outside of the bindings.

“See, she can’t even hold them up,” the Mistress snapped, pushing the female back against the wall.

“She can’t hold them up because the muscles have been weakened due to lack of use caused by binding them,” Cassin snarled right back, satisfaction coiling in him at the way she flinched away. “How the hell did you acquire an Illyrian female without even knowing anything of their basic anatomy?”

The Mistress glared at him again. “She was sold to us unsullied by a third party. Half Illyrian, half high fae. Her father gambled away all of their money, he was in debt and sold his daughter off to pay his debts.”

“The purchasing of females to work in pleasure houses is illegal. You are in direct violation of breaking that law,” Azriel spoke, staring the woman down. “Open the cage. She’s coming with us.”

The cage opens and Cassian gestures for the mistress to exit the space. She looks at the female before reluctantly stepping out. Azriel steps but keeps his distance.

“I’m Azriel. What is your name?” He asked, catching her green eyes that almost seemed to glow in the dim lights.

“Don’t bother. She’s had her tongue removed,” the Mistress answered, mouth snapping shut when Cassian’s head snapped in her direction.

Azriel growls low in his throat, but stops himself when he catches the look on the female's face in front of him. Terrified. She was absolutely terrified.

“It’s okay,” he offered softly, stepping further into the cage “cover yourself.”

She looked at him skeptically. Weary. Cautious. She glances at the stick the mistress leaned against the wall then down at her red streaked, bruised thighs. She was scared he was going to hit her if she covered herself. He silently ordered one of his shadows to remove the stick from the room. Rhysand would definitely be hearing about that.

“No further harm will come to you, please, cover yourself,” Azriel soothed, shifting so she was out of view of the horrible Mistress behind him.

She watched him for a second before she dropped her head down and slowly folded her wings around herself, effectively covering her body.

“Have you ever winnowed before?” Azriel asked, watching her brows furrow. “Don’t be scared. I need to touch you but I’m only going to wrap my arm around you okay?”

The female was hesitant, but took a step forward. Those two men were terrifying, but they never looked away from her face unlike every other male who only stared at her body. Maybe wherever they were going to take her would be better than this place.

Azriel outstretched his hand, watched her eyes track the movement and take in his scars and siphons. Though she still seemed terrified she shifted in a way that he could easily wrap his arm around her back.

“You’re coming with us, too,” Cassian snarls to the Mistress, grabbing her before slapping his hand down onto Azriel’s shoulder.

⋆ ݁⟡ ݁☾ ݁⟡ ݁⋆

One minute they were standing in the pleasure house then the next there was nothing but swirling darkness. She clung to Azriel, somehow finding comfort in the arm wrapped securely around her.

When things came back into view the first thing she noticed were the stars in the sky. It had been so long since she saw the sky. Only she hadn’t been able to focus on it long, realizing they weren’t on a flat surface they were in the air and…falling.

A scream threatened to escape from her lips but that arm tightened around her and they were no longer falling but gliding lower and lower until they swooped through a window. She couldn’t really tell where she was at but as soon as her feet hit the ground she collapsed into herself. She pulled her knees to her chest inside of her winged cacoon, pushing her forehead against them and willing the sickness in her stomach to go away.

She didn’t look up at the sounds of a struggle, trying to ignore the grunting growls of a male who had just been slapped before the high pitched voice demanded, “Let me go! Take your hands off of me, you have no right!”

And she had been too scared to look up when she heard a booming voice that seemed to shake the very ground she was clinging to.

“He had every right,” is what that booming voice said, commanding silence from everyone in the room.

The silence was deafening.

She heard the sound of heels clicking, closer then further away then back in her direction again. She still didn’t look up. Not when she felt those heels next to her, or when the person wearing them wrapped something warm around her.

“My High Lord, please—”

“Take her to a cell,” That voice ordered again, not as loud but just as commanding and for a moment she thought they were talking about her.

She was about to beg. Don’t make me go. Please. Please, don’t take me to another cell!

It was only when she heard the other female, the Mistress, struggling again that she realized he wasn’t talking about her. He wasn’t locking her away…not yet anyway. When the struggling stopped and the shouts could no longer be heard. That’s when she looked up.

Her eyes instantly met dark violet. He looked similar to the other two males…golden tanned skin, dark hair, tall, but no wings. Unless they were hidden like hers had been.

“My name is Rhysand. What’s your name?” The voice asked, soothing almost, easing the tension from her shoulders.

“She can’t speak, Rhy,” the male from earlier, Azriel spoke. “They cut her tongue out.”

There’s a sharp intake of breath beside her and she remembers someone had been beside her. She looks up, taking in the heels, red silk top, blonde hair curled, and a pair of deep brown eyes on a beautiful face.

There is sadness in those eyes, etched in her flawless face and she has to look away. The anger flashing in those violet eyes isn’t much easier to look at.

“If I get you a pen and paper can you write?” He asked, again that voice soothing her in a way she didn’t quite understand. She shook her head.

Her father never taught them to read or write. They had no need for either being locked in that basement…that dark, cold, terrifying basement—

The male, Rhysand as he’d been called, frowns. Looking towards Azriel as if they were having a silent conversation before his eyes fall on her again and he takes a step forward, crouching down so they were eye level.

“I’m a daemati. Do you know what that is?” Rhysand asked. She shook her head again. “It means I can see and enter into people’s minds. Like this—hello, my name is Rhysand.”

Her eyes widen as that voice echoes in her head. What is happening right now? She meets Rhysand’s eyes, mouth falling open slightly. “You can hear me, too?”

“I can,” he responded out loud. “May we have the pleasure of knowing your name, sweetheart?”

She thought for a moment. No one had asked her for her name. They called her a lot of things…but never her name. She swallowed thickly, cleared her throat and nodded slowly.

“Cassandra. My name is Cassandra.” She answered, watching a warm smile come over his face as he stood and took the last few steps, offering his hand to her.

She doesn’t hesitate, placing her hand in his and allows him to gently pull her to her feet. She glances in the direction of Azriel and the pretty blonde just as the other male from before enters the room.

He shares that same look with Rhysand, like they’re communicating silently and now she knows that’s most likely the case. Rhysand dips his head in answer to whatever was said.

“Let me properly introduce you,” He says, gesturing to the three people in the room with them. “This is Azriel, Cassian and Morrigan. Everyone, this is Cassandra.”

Her heart skips in her chest. She hadn’t realized that it could feel so nice just to hear someone say her name. She gives Rhysand a small grateful look, hoping he understood what it means. He just gave her a single nod.

“Cassandra, you are officially under the protection of the night court,” Rhysand said, as she stood there staring at him. She felt something in her mind, like an opening and assumed it must be him waiting to see if she needed to say something.

“High Lord?” Cassandra asked and he nodded though he looked confused.

“Yes, I’m a high lord. Do you know what that is?” he asked. She shook her head, shrugging her shoulders meekly. The four of them share a look and it makes her want to drop back down into her cocoon and hide. “We can do a run down of titles and histories later. I am High Lord of Velaris, I rule this city and all of the people in it. Cassian is the commander of my armies. Azriel is my spy master. And Morrigan is my third in command as well as my cousin.”

Cassandra stands there. Everything coming from his mouth sounded foreign as if he was speaking another language. She nodded her head but it was more than obvious she didn’t really understand.

“Morrigan will escort you to your room—”

“Room? Not cell?” She asked surprised, not meaning to cut him off.

“You are not a prisoner, Cassandra. So, no, you won’t be sleeping in a cell. You will have your own room and you can do as you please,” Rhysand promised. “I have two amazing females, Nuala and Cerridwen that will tend to you. I would also like you to know I’ve placed a special ward on your room. No male will be allowed to enter your room, not even me unless you specifically invite them in. I want you to feel safe here. No one will lay a hand on you again without your permission. Not here. Not anywhere. Not ever again.”

Cassandra isn’t exactly sure what to say or what to do. No one, not even her own family has ever been this kind or considerate of her. She feels the tears in her eyes as she looks at him.

“Thank you.” Is all she can manage.

“There’s no need to thank me,” He shakes his head. Genuine. Sincere. There’s no trick behind his kindness. “Nuala and Cerridwen will take care of you, if you need anything ask them and they’ll get it for you. Once you feel comfortable and settled please come join us for dinner if you’re hungry. Do you need any special foods?”

“No…just soft foods. If there’s meat it just has to be small,” She answered, not wanting to show how special it felt that he asked that question silently.

“Not a problem at all,” Rhysand promised, giving her a small smile before waving Morrigan back over.

“Come, you’ll be right through here,” the beautiful female speaks, her voice smooth and warm. It reminded Cassandra of her mother.

Cassandra gave a small head nod before following Morrigan. The stone floors cold under her bare feet as she pulled the cover tighter around herself. The large, wooden double doors opened seemingly on their own accord. Cassandra looked back, locking eyes with Azriel, that male with the shadows, for a moment before they turned out of the room.

They walked down the hall in what Cassandra could only describe as comfortable silence. It gave her time to take in the beautiful home that seemed to be carved from…stone? Accented by wood and golden lights.

Cassandra slowed when they passed a particularly beautiful painting that caught her eye. The click of Morrigan’s heels slowed as well. The painting was of a large city, glow lights, and a bright river all at the base of a beautiful huge mountain. She scanned the painting. It felt so warm and inviting just like this home and the people in it.

“That’s Velaris,” Morrigan says from behind her. “Have you ever seen the city?”

Cassandra’s eyes stay on the painting and shakes her head. She hears the other female swallow thickly but still can’t tear her eyes from the beautiful painting.

“This is the city, it holds houses and businesses,” Morrigan begins pointing at the painting and tracing around the area she was talking about before moving to the brightest, most colorful part of the painting. “This is what we like to call the Rainbow. It’s where our artists of all kinds live. I like to go there to eat the music, it’s home to the best pastries, too! This here is the Sidra River, it’s sparkling blue in the daytime and winds all the way through Velaris. And this is where we are. We call it the House of Wind.”

Cassandra’s jaw drops a little when Morrigan points to the mountain, to the house carved in it. She looks around then back at the painting. Beautiful.

“One day, when you’re feeling up to it, you and I could have a girls day in the city. Just me and you. And I could show you all of the best shops, we could walk along the Sidra, you’ll love it. But only when you’re ready!” She clarified and Cassandra finally looked at her hearing the excitement in her voice.

“I don’t have many female friends and I can only have so much fun with those males,” She said, a smile stretching her red painted lips.

Cassandra tried to return the smile but she was sure it didn’t look genuine, she liked the idea of being…friends with Morrigan. But she didn’t know what all that entailed. Would Morrigan expect things of her if they became friends? Like those girls at the pleasure house?

“Come let’s get you to your room,” Morrigan cut through her thoughts and Cassandra offered a small nod before following once again.

Two more turns and a flight of stairs got them to where they were going. Two beautiful females stood outside an open door, dark skin with eyes and hair to match.

“Nuala and Cerridwen,” Morrigan motioned to each female, “this is Cassandra. Please, help her get cleaned up, changed and settled in. Cassandra, once you're settled, like Rhys said, please, consider coming to join us for dinner.”

Morrigan offers a smile before turning away. Cassandra’s hand shoots out to grab her wrist, to stop her, only to realize what she’d done and let go immediately, stumbling back a step.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Morrigan soothed, reaching out to steady her. “Would you like me to walk in with you?”

A jerky head nod was the answer she got.

“Alright, come,” She breathed softly, walking in the room first and waiting patiently for Cassandra.

When she entered the room her mouth fell open at how large it was. Situated in the middle of one wall was a huge bed—so huge she was sure she could lay on it, stretch her wigs out as far as they would go and still have room to spare. The covers were white and looked so fluffy. There were glowing lights all around the room. The opposite wall of the bed held a wall of glass less windows. Another wall held a table and chairs and a shelf with books. Then the other side opened into a large bathroom.

“Take a moment for yourself. Your life is about you now, Cassandra. You will never be used for someone else's pleasure or entertainment ever again. This is your room. This is your home now,” Morrigan speaks and Cassandra feels her eyes tear up but then Morrigan's heels are leaving the room and those two dark skinned beauties are leading her to the bathroom.

⋆ ݁⟡ ݁☾ ݁⟡ ݁⋆

As soon as she was out of the room Morrigan broke down. Hot tears slid down her cheeks as she made her way back to the room she left the other three male in. She had just calmed herself when she walked in and saw them standing together.

“Is everything okay, Mor?” Cassian asked, siphons gleaming atop his hands.

“I don’t think she’s ever been outside before, Rhys,” and just like that Morrigan’s eyes were brimming with tears once again. Rhys fixed her with a look urging her to explain, an ache in his own chest. She takes a breath, looking up and wiping the tears from her eyes. “We were passing that big painting of Velaris and she had no clue what she was looking at. She had no idea what her own home looked like. And on top of that she was terrified to even walk in the room alone, I had to walk her in. And—and she looked at the room like she didn’t believe it was real. Especially the bed and I keep thinking that maybe she never even had a bed!”

Cassian is the one to walk over and offer Morrigan the comfort of a hug. “It’s okay. We’re gonna take care of her now. Find all the people who did this, help her through it all and help her find herself. She’s gonna be okay.”

Rhys and Azriel look at one another. “There’s no telling how many other girls like Cassandra there are out there. I’m hoping she will join us for dinner so I’m able to ask her some questions without her feeling cornered. Azriel, Cassian, I want you two to go talk to that mistress, find out what you can without harming her…for now. Her and anyone else involved will be prosecuted accordingly. Go. now.”

#acotar #slow burn #acotar fanfiction #azriel #azriel fanfic #azriel x reader

610 notes · View notes

readychilledwine · 9 months

Note

Hellos. Could do something where the reader is azriel mate and they are kidnapped. She sacrifices her wings to save his life. And mention how az is angry that it happened and whatever u think will look good. Thank you.

👀👀👀👀 I, uh, may have a thing for shattering my own heart only to pick up the pieces. So yes. Yes, I can. Hopefully, you enjoy it, and I did it justice, dearest!

Beauty in Pain

Azriel x Illyrian reader

Warnings - not over descriptive mentions of torture and dismemberment, Azriel goes feral, depression, the usual unedited by an outside source.

Word count -2030

✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

You were better trained than this.

That reminder was echoing inside your mind like a war drum, beating senselessly into your thoughts as you were dragged down the barely lit pathway under the temple. You knew no one was coming. Faebane had blocked the mating bond, blocked your ability to call Rhys or Feyre. You'd be lucky if they found you, alive or dead.

It had started a routine mission. Head to the war camps, ask the leader for reports, speak with the females, head home to your mate.

Your mate. The one you prayed had felt the bond grow cold despite the many promises to never shut each other out. The one who'd slaughter every single male involved in this when he found out where you were, who had you, and what they planned to do or will have done.

You didn't fight as they laid you face down on the concrete block in the room. They had planned this, planned how long to keep you on a specific dose of faebane, no food, and no water. Planned the beatings used to weaken you on a cycle. You felt it and flinched as two sets of hands roughly grabbed your left wing.

You were prepared to be clipped as a form of torture for the information they wanted. You knew it was coming. But as blinding pain left you with no choice but to scream out for your mate, for your brother, for Rhysand, you knew the plan was worse than you had imagined.

But you did not yield. You bared the pain, allowing it to try and break you until the world grew cold and dark.

—-----------

Azriel was pacing Rhysand's office. He had not slept in the 7 long days you had been overdue for, at the very least, a check in, after the missive Rhys and Cassian had received.

They have not started training the females. I will be home or rewrite soon. I promise. The three Illyrian males had trusted you to handle it. They had trusted you would be safe, unharmed, respected.

And despite every alarm ringing in his heart, mind, and soul, Azriel had not gone to you right away.

Rhysand's eyes glazed over, his face dropping slowly as he received whatever message he was receiving. He came back to them slowly, moving without speaking as he started grabbing weapons and tossing them to Azriel and Cassian.

The High Lord's voice was dealthy calm as he finally spoke. "A set of wings, freshly removed, was just found outside of my mother's cabin. There's no signs of (y/n) anywhere in any of the camps the twins searched. The only thing reported to them was in the northernmost camp."

Rhysand breathed deeply. "A female was carried through the camp, unconscious with her head and body covered. That same night the camp heard screams from midnight until early into the morning."

Cassian's breath caught in his throat before he immediately grabbed Rhysand's arm. "Take me there, now."

"How long ago," Azriel's voice had gone cold and detached. "How long ago did that happen? How long has she been sitting Mother knows where with untreated wounds or dead?"

Rhysand refused to look at Azriel, reaching to grab his brother's hand, before finally whispering. "4 days."

—------------

The rescue had turned into a bloodbath. There was zero question as a panicked shadows all but dragged the three of them to an abandoned temple.

It reeked of her blood, her sweat, her tears.

It held an almost haunting aura as if the terror and pain of her screams had scarred the ancient stone, marking it to forever echo her agony to anyone walking inside.

Azriel didn't want to ask questions. He didn't want prisoners. He wanted payment in blood.

He had cut through every single male that appeared in their path before Rhysand and Cassian even had a chance to interfere on his way to the dungeons his shadows were pleading with him to get to quickly.

And now one last male stood between him and the cell she laid unconscious in. "Move or be moved," Rhysand told him coolly. "I would not push your luck."

The male stared at a blood soaked Azriel. His shadows were curling over his shoulders like snakes waiting to strike. His wings flared wide in dominance and anger. His 7 siphons glowing.

The young male moved, allowing Rhysand to grab him and winnow him away to the Prison before Azriel could beat him to death as well. Cassian moved quickly to the door, opening it with the key they had found, before entering the small cell containing his sister.

The anguished sob that left Cassian was the only confirmation Azriel needed. "Y/n," he heard Cassian tapping your body. "Come on, sis. Wake up."

Dying. Azriel's shadows confirmed. Infections. We cannot safely winnow her. Rhys is bringing a healing team. Need more space.

Azriel moved into the cell, holding the scream in his throat as he was overwhelmed with the urge to run to you. Cassian had you cradled into his chest, rocking you back and forth before looking up at Azriel, eyes rimmed with tears. "We need to get her somewhere that Madja can use to work on her. Rhys is bringing her and a team of healers here." Azriel held his arms out, a silent demand in the movement.

Cassian only nodded. Standing and carefully transferring your beaten and bleeding body into Azriel's arms, following him out of the room.

—---------------

3 long weeks of silence had passed in the House of Wind.

No one had gone to Azriel's room.

No one had spoken to him without the male lashing out.

There was nothing they could do to comfort him but allow him to be with you.

When you first got home, while you were lying unconscious with Madja, Helion, and Lucien looking after you, Rhys had managed to get out of the male Azriel allowed to live one very simple thing.

You let them torture you, let them completely take your wings, to force you to look into death's eyes, and you had allowed them to do it to protect Azriel. You had refused to give them his schedule to visit the camps. You refused to tell them when he'd be there alone again. You refused to tell them which pathway he flew in using or where he'd shadow-walk himself to first.

You had lost your wings to protect him. Your husband, your mate.

Azriel had lost it then, guilt eating away at him, and began beating the male to death with his bare fists as Cassian and Rhysand just watched. They knew what was echoing in his mind. She will live, Madja had said, but she will never be the same. Her wings can't be reattached or saved, no one has the ability to give her back what was taken.

You hadn't spoken to Azriel, Rhys, or Cassian when you finally woke up. You only sat in your window, staring at the sky.

The one you'd never feel going through your hair again. The one you'd never touch again. The one you'd never taste again.

It was funny, you thought to yourself, to have been protected and trained to ensure this never happened, only for the moment it did to come 500 long years later.

It had been a full week later when Azriel cornered you in the shower and just held your naked body for you two to speak. Another week passed before you allowed him to kiss you and hold you without him having to force the contact. You had yet to show interest in leaving the bedroom the two of you shared.

You felt familiar scarred hands on your bare shoulders, wrapping around to your collarbones before running up the front of your neck and tilting your head back. "Dinner alone tonight or dinner with our family?" His voice was scratched from the crying you two had been doing. His eyes were swollen and red. "I already know the answer, I just need to verbally hear it."

"I wish to be alone." He nodded. Taking the cue and leaving you to your window as he sat back on the couch, head falling into his hands, as he began to cry again.

You watched his shoulders shaking, listened to his almost silenced sniffling. You knew things had forever changed in your relationship.

There would be no more missions for you.

No more trips with Amren away from him.

No more walking Velaris alone.

There would be no more date nights spent flying.

No more jumping from high places together, allowing yourselves to fall until the last possible second, only to spread those precious wings.

There'd be no more wing play late into the early mornings, edging each other with small touches in certain places until you were both begging for relief.

But you knew deep down, more than anything, there would be a new Azriel. One that would have one more thing to hold against himself. One that would have one more moment of his life to look back on and use as an argument for how he wasn't enough.

And you couldn't have that. You would not stand for it.

You couldn't have the broken male you had spent time healing with, growing with, and struggling with. You could not have the one who blamed himself for every little thing again.

You stood on slightly unstable feet, and walked to your closet, a shadow trailing you. Rhys had immediately replaced your clothing, ensuring you would not have to go through ordering it yourself, and had the twins place the new materials into your closet. A simple black dress was what you picked. It would stop right above your knees, hug your torso beautifully. You closed the closet door, calling for Rhys silently in your mind and jumping as his hands appeared behind you. "I need help." You whispered.

His eyes searched yours before nodding and helping you change into the dress. Allowing you to use him to balance. A kiss was placed on the back of your head as he laced it up. Gentle, but full of emotion. And he winnowed away.

You left the closet, walking to Azriel on the couch slowly with a pair of his trousers and a black button-up shirt in hand. "I changed my mind. I'm craving that cake, the almond one with the vanilla frosting."

Azriel scoffed lightly. "I am not leaving you to go get cake. I will ask Rhysand-"

"I need you to fly me there, Az. I want to go get the cake, eat it at the Cafe with coffee, and then I want you to take me for a walk on the Sindra. And maybe go to that book store. The used book one."

He was silent before looking at you. His hazel eyes were full of question. "Y/n-"

"If my mate will not take me, I will ask my brother. I want cake, and I want my husband to take me to get it."

"I don't think you understand how heartbreaking not being able to truly fly is going to be, my heart."

You only repeated yourself, voice smaller this time. "If my mate will not take me, I will ask my brother. I want cake." You paused, eyes welling with tears. "I deserve cake and coffee. If I want cake and coffee for dinner, I expect my mate, the male who married me and bound himself to me, to take me."

Azriel nodded. Grabbing the clothing from you and he changed in silence. He stood on the balcony waiting as you took calming breaths and walked outside for the first time in many weeks.

"I am not responsible for the setback in your mental health after this."

"No, but you are monetarily responsible for my cake and purchases. Let's go." He took you in his arms, holding you close to his chest and took off hard.

And in that moment, you both knew something new had begun. You were laughing as he concentrated way more than usual to fly. You were smiling at how this allowed you to feel his body heat, to hear his heartbeat, to touch his face.

You were laughing at how he began genuinely laughing at you. Not understanding where the sudden joy filling the bond and over flowing it like a faucet set to run for too long came from.

It wasn't until he paused in the sky, hovering so he could look down at your smiling face did you both realize something.

Losing your wings was just the beginning.

#acotar #acotar x reader #azriel #azriel acotar #azriel x reader #azriel x oc #azriel fic #azriel x illyrian!reader

1K notes · View notes

lovelyladyabsinthewrites · 4 months

Text

Pairing(s): Rhysand x Reader, Cassian x Reader, Azriel x Reader

Warnings: poly relationship, smut, sharing is caring, poly mates, fff what i would give to have the bat boys as my mates, voyeurism, masturbation, bratty reader, disobeying rhys and the gang, punishment, overstimulation

Words: 1761

Summary: One major flaw of your's: You were cocky of not just your own strengths, but also the guard dogs at your beck and call. Your three mates.

You knew you were in deep shit the moment you nailed the coffin into your decision.

Rhysand forbade you from acting out on your own during this reconnaissance. Normally he wouldn't have said anything; you were good at whatever you put your mind to and you knew how to behave yourself unlike Cassian who was known to blow his cover from time to time. You and Azriel made an excellent spy pair. Both levelheaded and calculating, not to mention very deadly. Lacking the useful shadows that were unique to Azriel, that didn't stop you from being just as intimidating.

Or perhaps reckless.

That was one major flaw of your's. You were cocky of not just your strengths, but also the guard dogs at your beck and call. Your three mates. Yes, THREE.

A fae would be lucky to find their soulmate in their lifetime. Many never felt that electrifying spark of your invisible bond being snapped into place. And you'd felt it three times. A phenomenon that had never been witnessed before in all of fae history. It caused Rhysand to delve deep into the House of Wind's library to look up whatever he could about fae soulmates. He even went so far as to ask Helion, whom he had a somewhat friendly relationship with, if he could scrounge up any information on his end. The Day Court high lord upon hearing of this immediately became highly interested.

Of course you would feel indestructible. On top of the world even. In your pocket you possessed a High Lord, a general and a spymaster. You yourself were known as the Mistress of Poison.

None of that would save you from disobeying Rhysand's orders though. Sometimes you forgot that you HAD to obey him. Even if the four of you stood together as equals, there was still a power dynamic when regarding Rhysand. Azriel would not be covering for you this time.

"It was the perfect opportunity Rhys!" Trying to argue your case once more, Rhysand merely holds a hand up to quiet you. You pout, biting down on your lower lip to prevent anymore words from slipping out. Nervously you glance to either side of you where Cassian and Azriel stood.

Az's blue eyes catch you in the corner, he stiffly shakes his head. Don't argue, love.

Even Cassian's voice chimes in You've really done it this time.

He wasn't exaggerating. Rhys' pretty violet eyes were hardened. "You could have gotten hurt." More importantly, you blocked me from your thoughts. Like you think I wouldn't know. "You disobeyed me. You could have even blown Azriel's position."

Unlikely. . . Azriel half muses but returns his face to a neutral expression when he caught Rhysand's gaze sharply slice into him.

Utterly foolish, you utter "But I didn't get hurt. And I didn't blow Azriel's cover." The pressure of his power thickens the air around you. "I succeeded in killing them, didn't I? Succeeded in what we were sent out to do."

Cauldron, zip your beautiful mouth. Mentally hisses Cassian. From the corner of your eye you catch a twitch of his wings.

You were digging your own grave yet you couldn't stay silent. Rhys' doubt of your capability wounded you.

Rhys sighs deeply through his nose, the rigidness of his broad shoulders reduces when he reads your thoughts. "That's not the issue here."

"You don't think I can take care of myself? That I can't be trusted like Cassian and Azriel?"

Inhaling deeply through his nose, Rhysand's deep black hair shifts as he shakes his head. "Perhaps this is my fault. You think you don't have to listen to me because you're my mate. That you don't have to listen to any of us."

From either side, you suddenly feel hands clamp down on your wrists. Rounded eyes gawk at Cassian before swiveling to Azriel. You give your wrists an experimental tug to test your restraints. Fingers like iron manacles.

"You're spoiled."

Brat.

The click of his boots hammer into your chest each step he took.

"I can't let this insubordination continue. I know you can take care of yourself. If you had discussed this with us, we would not be in the situation we're in now."

You didn't even tell Az where you'd rushed off to. And you didn't care about what you would be putting him through with your vanishing act.

Finally Rhysand stands in front of you. His entire hand was able to grab your entire jaw. "I'm proud that you succeeded. But I'm going to have to remedy your arrogance."

You try to wrench your face out of his grasp, in response Rhysand tightens his hold. He's not looking at you, addressing the other two. "Take her to my room. I'll be there in a moment. Have her ready."

A thrilling surge shoots through your core, alongside terror that you would be at their complete mercy. Unable to touch and coax them. All of you knew you wouldn't apologize for what you did. This wasn't the first time you'd callously acted on your own. To your credit, it had been quite some time since you'd last disobeyed Rhys.

"Really should have kept your mouth shut." Cassian barks out a laugh as he and Azriel haul you off.

Azriel shakes his head but even he has a smile quirking up the corners of his mouth. "Maybe it's you who needs to shut your mouth Cass. She may be at our mercy, but I doubt that exempts you from having your dick bitten."

He rolls his eyes. "She would never! Love my cock too much, don't you?"

In reply you snap your jaws at him before turning your attention to Az. "You know I didn't mean anything bad by what I did. I know I should have taken your feelings into consideration-"

"But you didn't. Don't think you can sweeten me up with a belated apology." Hazel eyes narrow at you. He would be offering no help to you. "Be silent and accept your punishment.

The cover over your eyes disorients you even more. Still you were able to distinguish whose cock was shoved into your mouth and whose teeth were sweetly nibbling on your clit causing you to cry out and beg for mercy.

You'd already orgasmed twice and your poor clit was overstimulated to the point where pleasure bordered pain.

You try to yank your hands free from Rhys' magic that bound you. His heavy gaze weighing you down. You didn't require sight, of course Rhysand would be watching. Probably fisting his own thick cock that was beading with precum. He wouldn't waste his seed on masturbating though.

"Alright. Have her present." Rhys voice sounds lazy as he commands his general and spymaster to stop.

Suddenly your body is pulled this way and that until your face is pressed against a pillow, ass positioned high up. Rough hands spread your legs so your already messy cunt is on display for the High Lord of the Night Court.

There's a sharp smack to your ass that has you yelping.

Another.

And another.

Then obtrusive fingers slide right into your exhausted pussy. You'd already taken Cassian and Azriel. Twice.

A hand, most likely Az's, strokes your sweat soaked hair.

"We're a team, are we not?" Rhysand's harsh tone clips through your pants.

"Y-Yes." At that point you'd allow all three of them to try and shove their dicks inside of your cunt if it meant you could get water and some rest. "M'sorry. . ."

"We talk things out together." He removes his fingers and you could feel the spongy tip of his cock prod at you. "None of us make a move until all of us agree. Was that not the plan? Don't apologize just to me."

"M'sorry Cass. . . S-Sorry Az. . ." You're barely able to catch your breath when you feel Rhysand breach your folds. Your nails cling desperately to the sheets under you.

Cassian laughs. "I know you are, sweetheart. I forgive you."

Azriel's scarred digits are still weaving through your hair as he hums. "Just remember next time. Don't let it happen again."

"Though I dare say she likes being punished." Darkly laughs Cassian when Rhysand finally snaps his hips forward to sheathe himself inside of you.

He stretches your walls to their limit in a ferocious rhythm that has you unattractively squealing. Rhysand's grip on your waist is firm as he keeps you in position with the help of your other two mates. You can't help the drool that dribbles out of the corner of your mouth. Especially when his balls keep tapping against your clit.

Through his own groans of pleasure at the absolute death grip your pussy had on his shaft, Rhysand manages to pull himself together to ask "What do you guys think, should I make her cum again?"

"N... N. . . No!" You helplessly protest from under him.

They just laugh.

"Never heard you reject an orgasm before." Azriel cheekily comments.

Rhysand must have thought it a good idea since you felt another white hot jolt when the pad of his finger lands on your poor clit that throbbed with its own heartbeat. "Our High Lady can take one more."

You thought you'd ascended to another plane of existence.

Your boys spent the next two hours bathing you from the mess they'd made of your body.

With feather light touches, Azriel gently ran a soft towel over your sensitive skin.

Sitting between Rhysand's legs, your High Lord washed your hair. When he came across a knot, Rhysand coaxed it free without the harsh tugging they'd previously been doing with it. He'd asked you to recount to him how you'd killed the target. Now that the hard feelings were over, your boys wanted to hear about your success.

After bathing, Cassian presents you with a pre-warmed towel that engulfed your whole being.

Once in bed, your eyes grew warm. "I am sorry. Really. We are a team. I shouldn't have acted on my own."

Rhysand leans down to brush his lips along the bridge of your nose before kissing you. "You don't have to apologize anymore."

Cassian, being your favorite teddy bear, slithers under the sheets with you and pulls you to his expansive chest. He insisted on being first in the cuddling duties. Rhysand and Azriel unfortunately had to finish their own respective duties. But the general was all your's for the rest of the night.

He kisses the crown of your head. "Rest sweetling."

Azriel kisses your cheek before standing tall. "Have sweet dreams."

617 notes · View notes

redheadspark · 5 months

Text

Trust

Summary - Azriel takes his son flying for the first time

Warnings - Fluff with a hint of smut

Author's Note - I am thinking of turning this into a series with Azriel, the reader, and their son! Let me know if you want to see a series for it!

“Today’s the day! Are we ready?”

“You should be asking his mother that very question.”

You grinned as you turned around to see both Feyre and Rhysand standing together, hand in hand as they were watching for your reaction. But their eyes were down to your hands that were clenched tight together, almost in a death grip. It rang bells in Feyre’s head, she immediately walked over and took your hands together in her own to make you unclasp your fingers.

“You alright?” She asked, you nodding and taking in a long breath as she spoke once more, “It’s going to be fine, okay?”

“Nothing will happen, you have my word,” Rhysand vowed to you as he too walked over to place a reassuring hand on your arm to give you some sense of comfort, “I’ll be there for every moment of it, I promise. And you know your husband wouldn’t let anything happen, not on his watch.”

“I know,” You said to him, reaching over to squeeze his hand, “I know it’s going to be fine and you both will be there. It’s just….this is a lot.”

“It is,” Feyre hummed in agreement, her warm smile giving you a sense of comfort as she leaned against her mate and husband, “’ I was feeling the same thing you’re feeling with Nyx. But I knew deep down he was easy, and so is your son,”

You were both excited and dreading this day for some time, excited since you knew it would be a life-changing day for not just your child but for your family, and dreading since it was a sure sign that he was growing up on you. He was only 4 years old, yet you could remember the day he was born and how he came wailing into the world with a pair of lungs and a thirst to live. Your pregnancy was not ideal, nor was it something you would ever regret. Nor did his father, who was beyond excited to have his own little family to love on and to nurture.

His father and your mate, Azriel.

You two grew up together as Illryians, you were one of the very few female Illryians that was born into the Illyrian training camp. Although your mother died in childbirth with you and your father abandoned you because of the loss of his mate, your cousin was Rhysand and his own mother took in. She was the mother you needed, both nurturing and stern with you when you needed it, but she also taught you all you needed to know in order to survive the Illyrian life. As a seamstress, she also taught you the trade and you were making dresses alongside her as you got older.

She sheltered you and protected you, made you feel a motherly love in a cruel world. It was then you met Cassian and Azriel, two Illyrian boys who became close to you and your cousin Rhysand. They both were wild, filled with that boyish charm and thrill, and you grew to love them instantly. Especially Azriel, who caught your heart from the moment you saw his hazel eyes that were etched in pain and torment from all he went through with his own childhood. Yet he was kind, sheltered with his own feelings, and willing to bond with Cassian and Rhysand as If they were his own blood related brothers.

You both fell in love with each other over time, there was no way of stopping the sensation of being in love with him as you two grew up side by side. He loved you with all of him, showing you the sides of him that would hide in the dark and would never be seen by others. Although Azriel thought of you as the rays of the sun along his shadows and a lighthouse in the chaos of a storm, he was afraid that you would run from him and think of him as a monster.

He was far from wrong as you kissed him under the stars when you two were teenagers. He knew then that his heart belonged to you and you alone.

Years came and went, tears and torment threatened to take the two of you apart, but you two stayed together and never lost one another along the way. When Rhysand was taken Under the Mountain, you were left in charge of Night Court because you were blood-related. It was a heavy burden to carry on, but you weren’t alone. You had Cassian, your other cousin from the Court of Nightmares named Mor, a wise yet intimidating being named Armen, and of course Azriel. They all were behind you running Night Court and keeping it safe from the enemy’s hand. Especially Azriel, who was your backbone and your words of wisdom when things were rough. Most of all, he poured out his love for you when he knew you needed it, when you missed your cousin, when you felt unworthy yourself. You did the same to him, constantly loving him and making him feel so important and adored as you knew he was.

Your mating bond came easily one night when you two were deep in your lovemaking. His hands along your body, his hips rolling deeply against yours to bring you that pleasure you have been craving and needed from no one but him, you both felt that snap when you were about to orgasm. It was as if The Cauldron itself snapped inside of you and that bond was seeping along your veins. Azriel felt it too, gasping for air as you both orgasmed at the same time and your bond was singing in happiness and joy. As you two clung onto each other in happiness and in euphoria, you knew your life was forever changed because of him and no force would take the two of you away from each other.

So many years came and went: Rhsyand coming back as the High Lord of Night Court and finding his mate in Feyre, fighting against the human king Hybern to keep your Court and the citizens safe, there was finally a moment of peace for you and Azriel. You both were settling down in a small little house outside of the city. Azriel wanted a peaceful life with you, he knew you both needed it after going through stress and agitation. It was always the two of you for so long, which was what you both craved as the topic of growing your family came about.

Azriel knew you were hesitant since birthing Illyrian children was no easy task, let alone being pregnant with a Illyrian child. It was brutal, over half of mothers never survive in childbirth. Your mother was part of that statistic, and Azriel would never dare to loose you in such a way. You were mostly afraid of what could happen to you and the baby, talking to Azriel about it in hopes of wondering how he felt about bringing a child into the world. All you two knew was the way of children in the Illyrian world, a world that was cold and filled with avoidance and distance.

“If we are meant to be parents, then we’ll make it a happy home,” He reassured you as you both were sitting side by side on the front porch of your home, holding you in your arms as you were looking at your matching wedding rings, “Our home will be loving, something we both need from all we went through. But let’s not dwell on children now, I wanna simply be here with you, okay?”

“Okay.” You replied, feeling him kiss you on the cheek as you both watched the moon hanging high above. It always was on the back of your mind, but Azriel was right. You two needed some year alone together to simply build back up what was almost lost thanks to the Battle and the harshness of your childhood.

But come to find out, a few months later, you were with child. And your son, Alec Rhysand, was born.

As if on cue, you heard a cluster of feet coming from the hallway of the House of Wind, the three of you looking to see the cluster of beings coming down the hall. You beamed from seeing them, massive smiles on their faces and excitement in their laughter and giggles. Nyx was leading the group, dressed in his small leathers that were a gift to him on his birthday by his father a year ago with his raven hair swept over his bright eyes. After him was Cassian in his leathers and his mate Nesta, their toddler daughter named Rose on Nesta’s hip who was babbling away with her bright wavy hair. She was an exact carbon copy of her mother, down to the nose and the grin that seemed both infectious and genuine.

“Big day today!” Cassian said with a pep in his step as Rose saw you, screeching for you as she grabbed at you with her little fingers. You giggled, taking the little one in your arms and snuggling her as Cassian gave him a big hug, “It’s a great day to learn how to fly!”

“Perfect weather conditions,” Rhsyand hummed in agreement, “And I think the balcony is the best place for Alec to start,”

“Can’t I fly with him, Dad? Please?” Nyx asked in earnest as he ran over to Rhsyand, hugging his father around the legs with his violet eyes pleading with him.

“Remember our deal? Let him fly with his dad first and then we can join them, okay?” Rhysand reminded his song, who grumbled and nodded his head. Rhysand chuckled and ruffled his hair with his fingers, “You watch, before you know it he’ll join us for our nightly flights,”

“Hey!” You said to him as Feyre slapped his shoulder.

“When he’s bigger! That’s what I meant!” Rhysand said in defense.

“I’m surprised Azriel is letting him fly,” Nesta commented to you as she took her daughter back in her arms, “But, I think it’s great. I bet he’s been looking forward to taking Alec flying hasn’t he?”

“He has,” You said lightly, “He hasn’t stopped talking about it for weeks.”

If you were hesitant about letting your son fly, Azriel was the opposite. In fact, he was looking forward to having his son in with the sky, sole because he knew nothing would happen to his child when he was there with them. Azriel was an amazing father to Alec, loving him from the moment Madja helped bring him into the world and placed him in Azriel’s arms. You saw the shift in your husband's eyes as your baby was whining and wiggling in his hold, his tiny wings and dark hair made him look just like his father and it made you cry in happiness.

He made every milestone with Alec memorable, from his first steps to his first words. Azriel never wanted to miss a moment, wanting to give his son the childhood he wish he had himself. It was making up for the lost memories he never had, the lost moments he wanted with his own mother but was taken abruptly to be replaced with pain and torment. Not with Alec, he would make it filled with love and kindness along with joy and warmth. All you could do was simply stand back and see Azriel's love on his son, holding him close if he would cry, tucking him into bed with a kiss on the head, even laughing together after wrestling in the grass.

It was the childhood Azriel wanted for himself, but now he was giving it to his own boy.

“There he is, the boy of the hour!”

You all turned to see Azriel walking down the hall in his Spymaster leathers and a big grin on his face. But by his side, holding his fingers in his hand, was your four-year-old Alec.

Alec had his father’s dark locks and tan skin, but your bright blue eyes that Azriel knew were pure gifts from The Cauldron. He was simply perfect and had a nervous smile on his face as he saw you. His face brightened as he waved at you shyly.

As Azriel and Alec made it to you, you knelt down to open your arms to your son as he huddled in close to your embrace. His wings, which have grown in the past year and have been deemed strong enough for flight, were tucked tight against his backside as you kissed your son on the head and felt him giggle.

“How are we feeling about flying today?” You asked him as you pulled away and looked at his eyes. He bit his lower lip, looking down at his feet for a brief moment before he showed you his bright blue eyes that were mirroring some hesitance and worry.

“I’m nervous, momma,” He said to you, to which you hummed and framed his face gently with your fingers.

“And remember that it’s okay to be nervous?” You reminded him, seeing him nod his head. You kissed the tip of his nose, “You are ready, Alec. And I know you are going to be amazing at flying, you need to trust your wings. They will not steer you wrong, okay?”

Azriel knelt down next to you, peering at his son with his soft smile that he would always use on his son. Alec would hang on his father’s every word if he could, thinking of Azriel as the center of his world and beyond. There was no doubt they both had a bond together since Alec was a baby, Alec fixing comfort with his father most of the time and Azriel never hesitating in helping his son through anything.

“You are strong, Alec. I’m going to be up there with you and not leave your side, just like we practiced at home.” He said to Alec, who nodded his head. You knew they were practicing constantly at your little home, Azriel showing Alec how to stretch and strengthen his wings to get him ready to hove off the ground. You showed your son with your own wings, Alec watching in amazement as his mother hovered off the ground and landed gracefully on the grass with ease. Even before that, when he was still a toddler, you would take Alec in your arms and fly around your home to both show him how flying felt and to bring in ease.

It was a core memory, Alec as a small toddler snuggled against you as you would soar in the sky and see him watch with his big blue eyes. Azriel would fly next to you, being ever protective of his wife and son as you hear Alec giggle in excitement and coo in joy. To watch his son bathed in the night sky and amongst the stars, held by his beloved wife and mate of centuries, it brought more love to Azriel than he ever felt before.

After Madja checked his wings and gave you both the green light to let him fly, Rhysand wanted it to be a monumental day since it involved his nephew. He wanted it to be on a warm Spring day, making sure the weather would be perfect. You and Azriel were grateful for him, and you most of all since he was your Cousin and yet considered you a sister of his since you were children yourselves. He protected you throughout your teenage years, praised you for keeping Night Court safe in his absence, and adored you when you and Azriel became mates and were married.

Rhsyand walked over to open the balcony door, the warm spring air coming into the room as you were all filtering out onto the grassy terrace. The massive view of Velaris below you was enchanting in the bright sunlight, with the glistening ocean not too far away bringing in the sea air with ease while Azriel walked with Alec in his hand to the middle of the grass. You stood at the side, biting your lower lip as Rhysand squeezed your shoulder with ease. As much as you wanted to be there to help him fly as well, you knew this was a moment with only Alec and his father. You never minded it, knowing your mate would do this perfectly with your son.

Azriel knelt in front of Alec, his shadow licking around his arms and wings to be ready for protection as his massive wings were sprawled out and ready. Alec watched, his father’s wings were bringing a shadow in front of his tiny face as Azriel nodded at his son.

“Get your wings ready,” Azriel instructed him, Alec nodding and rolling his shoulders. His own wings with some muscles seen started to stretch out, mirroring his father’s wings and he kept holding his father’s hands tightly in his own as Azriel grinned.

“Good, you’re doing good,” Azriel said to him in a soothing tone, “Now, concentrate on your wings and let them move. You can do it, buddy. Just take in a deep breath and take your time,”

Your heart warmed instantly from hearing how Azriel was talking to him, seeing his hazel eyes look at his son with love and patience as Alec slammed his eyes shut and tried his best to make his wings work. Everyone else was waiting on bated breath, not wishing to move and break the moment that was in the air. This was a sacred moment, a right of passage that was going to be remembered for the rest of one’s life. You and Azriel talked about it over and over, wanting it to both be perfect and filled with positivity for your son.

A redo to what you both endured as children.

Cassian was the first one to react, then his mate, and after Feyre and Rhysand. Gasps were heard, along with sharp intakes of breaths and murmurs. You were the last, fat tears were streaming down your face at the sight of your son how hovering over the grass with his toes barely touching the ground. His wings moved easily, naturally even, while his father was watching with the biggest smile on his face.

“Alec, open your eyes, baby. Look,” Azriel said to him as he held his son’s hands. Alec, with some reluctance, opened his blue eyes. His eyes went huge, looking down to see himself hovering and he giggled.

“I did it! I did it, Daddy!” He said in glee as he looked at Azriel. Azriel smiled widely, pride was all over his face as Alec looked over at you still he was still hovering off the ground with his feet kicking in giddiness, “Look, momma! I’m doing it!”

You were freely crying at this point, covering your mouth with your hands and smiling in pure ecstasy. It made your heart swell to see such a moment with not just your immediately family, but your Found family too. It was healing all the pain you had in your heart and in your past that seemed to go away, that healing was coming in small waves and not slowing down. Rhysand helped you heal, and Azriel helped you heal.

And now, your son was helping you heal.

“You ready?” Azriel asked Alec, getting his attention again as Alec nodded in excitement. Azriel’s wings were now active, making Azriel hover up a bit and bring Alec along with him with his little wings trying to keep up. They were now a few feet up from the ground, still holding each other’s hands as Azriel guided Alec to be nose-to-nose with him. You were more in love with him all the more, watching him guide your own in the best way he could.

Azriel’s shadows were now hovering around the pair of them in a protective bubble, they were still visible amongst the shadows with ease as your husband and son were still watching each other. You felt through your mating bond that Azriel was proud of his son, how happy he was to see his child go through a great milestone, and how much love he had in his moment. You were mirroring it yourself, knowing Azriel would feel it through the bond himself.

“You are strong, Alec Rhysand. Let your wings show you how strong you are,” he reminded him calmly. Within a few moments, Azriel was releasing his hold on Alec’s hands, letting Alec fly with no help and nothing else aiding him. Azriel was hovering right in front of him, his own hands were shaking from the sight but he was nonetheless grinning from ear to ear with pride etched all over his face.

“Atta boy, Alec!” Cassian cheered as the others were grinning and clapping, “You’re doing great, kid!”

“Well done!” Feyre said in a clasp of her hands as Nyx was bouncing on his feet in excitement.

“You did it, Alec! You’re flying!” Nyx shouted with a cup of his hands around his mouth. Alec was giggling in pure joy, no longer shy or afraid as he was looking around at himself and noticing his wings were already flapping in ease. But of course, his eyes were looking over to you as he gestured wildly to you.

“I’m doing it momma! Look, I’m flying, momma!” He said with a massive smile. Rhysand kissed the side of your head as Azriel look at you two. You both were sharing a mutual feeling of pride and love for your son as the others were cheering him on and encouraging him to keep going. You were dreaming of this day for years, dreaming of your future child being free in their own wings and loving the thrill of flying. Not the fear of it, not the fear needing to be sheltered away from whom they were. It was a new time for you all, and this was a sure sign of a bright future.

Come on, babe. Come fly with us. You heard Azriel say in the bond as Alec was now reaching out to you with his fingers, still hovering in front of his father but his eyes were pinned on you.

“Come on, momma! Fly with me!” He pleaded. It was like a siren call that you could never stray from, that you could never ever turn your back on no matter how hard you tried. Seeing the two loves of your life wishing for you to join them was all you could ever need in this life that was now filled with brightness. You moved away from your family, stretching your wings as you took flight with ease. Your wings were sighing relief in being in the air, you grinning as you met your son and husband in the air. Instantly, Azriel’s shadows stretched to be around you now as the three of you were in your own world together.

“You’re doing so well, my darling boy,” You cooed as Alec, whose wings were flapping faster now, “I’m so proud of you!”

“Me too, Alec,” Azriel added as Alec was watching him, “Now, follow me. Nice and easy now, okay?”

You were behind Alec as he was following his father at a snail’s pace, but was not showing any signs of slowing down or getting tired. Neither of you noticed Rhsyand, Nyx, and Cassian taking to the sky as well and making high circles above the three of you. But you were simply focusing on your son, who was having the time of his life in this milestone. Every struggle that you had, every nightmare you experienced thinking that you would never see the light at the end of the tunnel, none of that was there anymore.

You saw positivity, positivity and hope.

“He’s fast asleep, the poor thing is tuckered out,” You heard Azriel inform you as you were perched on the terrace of the House of Wind, grinning from ear to ear as the warm spring night was all around you in Velaris. The glittering city below you was still alive and filled with energy as your husband joined you. The rest of the home was quiet, Rhysand and Feyre winnowed back to the River House leaving Nyx to sleep with Alec in one of the guest rooms. Cassian and Nesta were in their own room for the night with Rose, leaving you and Azriel alone together and enjoying the view in peace.

You were standing against the railing, wrapped in a night robe as you felt his shadows lick against your neck and arms as a way to show his presence.

“He had a big day today, along with you,” you said as Azriel pulled you in his arms and pressed his head into yours lovingly. Breathing him in always brought you back to your center, feeling his toned muscles along your fingers made you feel safe and secure once again. Even after all of these years of being married and mates, he always knew the best way to hug you to make you feel loved.

“We both did,” He reminded you gently, you grinning as he searched your eyes, “And I know how far we both have come to be here, so I wanted to tell you how proud of you I am,”

“Az,” You said his name in a weka tone, though he hummed and shook his head.

“You have been so strong for so many years, saving this Court from downfall, saving me from being lost. I know I’m not the same person I was when I was young when we met, and I owe my life to you,” He proclaimed, you feeling fresh tears in your eyes while he wiped your tears gently with his soothing fingers “Our son is a reflection of you, my love. And I know I’m not one for saying how much I love you—“

“Hush,” You soothed him, hearing go silent instantly as you pressed a soothing kiss to his lips. He leaned into you, kissing you back just as gently as you two were drinking in the quiet moment together.

Once you pulled away from his lips, you nuzzled his nose against yours as you spoke once more, “You have loved me with no restraint and nothing holding you back. I don’t ever wish to have anything else replace your love for me, Az. Not in this life or the next, you have been and will always be everything to me and our son. I’m so proud of you too,”

Azriel smiled, the moon reflecting off his beautiful eyes as you two were still wrapped in each other’s arms from simple yet powerful words of affirmation. It was always like this with the pair of you, building each other up from the depths of pain and lack of self-worth. You saw the light in each other, the hope that was nestled deep inside and neither of you gave up on the other. It took a hard road, and plenty of arguments and fights, just to stay strong for one another.

Because of that, you have this new life, a beautiful and perfect son, and it felt as if nothing else could damage that.

You reached down to lace your fingers one another, clutching his palm to yours tightly as you grinned widely at him. Leaning in to barely touch your lips to his, you whispered, “Come fly with me,”

And he did, the pair of you taking to the sky and soaring amongst the stars with the city below, your love showing no abandon or no diminish.

The End.

Tagged - @valeridarkness

#azriel shadowsinger #azriel x reader #azriel x you #Azriel #acotar fanfiction #acotar #a court of thorns and roses #a court of mist and fury #a court of silver flames #azriel spymaster #azriel x oc #azriel fanfic #azriel acotar

540 notes · View notes

azrielslightintheshadows · 7 months

Note

Could I request a bat boys story? (any one, surprise me!)

Reader is being brought into the house of wind as a priestess when she peaks the interest of the boys but she's very shy. They feel the mating bond snap into place and try to romance her but start out too over the top. Since she is smaller in stature then then them, they end up overwhelming and scaring her a bit. They feel bad about it but once they take it down a notch and start small with things they slowly start to form a relationship when the mating bond finally snaps for the reader

Thank you so much for your writing! I'm enjoying your account so much!

-call me leaf annon 🌿

Scary mate.

Azriel x f!Reader.

Masterlist

Warnings; mentions of war, abuse, trauma and sexual assault.

This took way longer than I expected it to and gave me a hard time to write so I hope you enjoy it. I recently read here that Azriel is 6'10 so I decided to write this about him. Also I would like to thank you for your kind words and I hope you will enjoy this too.

The war was over and the king of Hybern was killed, everyone was picking their pieces and trying to rebuild their lives like before. You were lost, you didn’t have a home, the king destroyed your temple and killed most of the other priestesses there so you were alone. When the high lord of the night court found you, he immediately offered you a place at his court, he promised to protect you and give you a home, and you trusted him. So now here you are on the balcony of the house of wind next to Rhysand. “No one will harm you here, you will meet my family now and I promise you they are good… they will protect you and take care of you” Rhysand told you and you nodded. You smoothed your pale blue dress and fixed the stone that was hanging in the centre of your brow.

“I’m ready” you said, and Rhysand gestured to the big glass doors.

You walked inside and almost flinched at the sight; two huge males were standing in front of the dining table. Your eyes fell on the most intimidating one, he wasn’t as big as the other but the darkness that surrounded him made him look scarier. He was tall, you probably reached his chest, his body was twice your own and you could swear that if he hugged you, he would cover you entirely.

“Hello” you smiled politely.

The intimidating male’s eyes widened when you spoke, and he moved a bit closer to you. The movement caught you off guard and you instinctively took a step closer to Rhysand. The high lord scowled at him and cleared his throat. He didn’t take his eyes off him when he spoke.

“This is y/n she is the priestess I told you about.” Rhysand glanced at you, pausing for a few seconds before gesturing at one of the males “This is Cassian he is my army’s General, and this is Azriel my spymaster. We all grew up together, and I consider them my brothers.”

You nodded and glanced back at the two males. “Hello, its nice to meet you.” Cassian said and you once again smiled politely.

“You’re beautiful” Azriel blurted out surprising not only you, but his brothers too.

“Uhm thank you” you whispered. You felt uneasy by the whole situation and Azriel made you feel even more uncomfortable. You didn’t mind the compliment especially when it came from a stunning male like him, but he was so big, and he looked so strong… you knew he could overpower you anytime he wished and after what you saw during the war this fact made you feel scared.

“Would you like to see your room?” Rhys broke the silence. You nodded and followed him. “Other priestesses used to live here too, in the library but after the war they left to rebuild their temples.” He said and guided you in a big bedroom. You gaped at the bed; it was huge. Rhys noticed that and chuckled. “All the beds in this house are like that… to accommodate Illyrian wings.”

“Oh okay… that makes sense too.” You nodded your head as you spoke. “Too? What else did you think?” he asked, a curious look forming on his face. “I…” you blushed but gathered up your courage and continued “you guys are huge even without the wings, so I thought that was the reason”.

Rhysand threw his head back as he laughed making you blush harder. “Well yeah that too I guess” he said with an arrogant smile. You would scoff if he wasn’t the high lord.

“Anyway, I will let you settle. Please don’t be scared… they both are idiots, but kind idiots. They would never hurt you.” And with that he was gone. You took a deep breath and started exploring your room.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Evening came and your stomach rumbled, so you decided to head to the dining room again. They will probably be there having dinner too you thought and made your way there.

You were right, Cassian, Azriel and a female were sitting there, plates filled with food in front of them. They all looked at you when you walked in, and the female smiled.

“This is nice, Rhysand brought us another priestess to corrupt.” she said and both her and Cassian laughed “I’m Nesta by they way” she smirked. Azriel scowled at her and stood up, he pulled one chair back and stared at you. You approached him warily and flinched when his wings stretched behind him. He studied you for a moment and frowned. “You’re scared of me” he said. “No… I’m sorry” you muttered and sat on the chair, offering him a polite smile.

He leaned in, his one hand on the back of your chair and the other on the table in front of you. You felt caged in, his body so broad that it covered your view and his smell of cedar and smoke so powerful that you couldn’t breathe. He was taking over all of your senses, you only saw him, only smelled him and only felt him. It was too much and you gasped before jumping to your feet and backing off until you hit the wall behind you. Your eyes were wide, and you were panting.

“I’m sorry” he frowned “I didn’t mean to scare you, I just wanted to push your chair in...”

“I- I’m okay don’t worry about it”. Your voice was shaky and you couldn’t stand their gazes on you so you hurried off to your room, you could survive one night without food.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You were sitting on your bed when someone knocked on your door. You grabbed a small dagger you had kept on you from the temple and walked to the door, when you opened it no one was there. You started to close the door and noticed a tray on the ground, plates with different kinds of food were place on the tray and a blue rose. You furrowed your eyebrows and took the tray, out of the corner of your eye you noticed a shadow slithering away.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Morning came and you got ready for breakfast, you walked around the house and enjoyed the silence, no one seemed to be there. When you reached the dining room you noticed a plate on the table filled with pancakes and a blue rose next to it. You couldn’t understand what the meaning behind the blue roses was, but you enjoyed them anyway.

No one was in the house indeed, so you explored, and found the library easily.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Afternoon found you in the main room, on one of the sofas there lost deep inside the pages of the book and holding a cup of tea. The flapping of wings made you raise your head and soon enough Cassian with Nesta in his arms and Azriel walked in. The males were dressed in Illyrian leathers, you had seen those leathers before on Illyrian warriors, but you were shocked as you noticed their siphons. The warriors you met in the past wore up to four siphons but those two had seven on them. If that wasn’t enough, you noticed the colour of Azriel’s siphons, they were the same shade of blue as the roses you found. Was he the one who left the roses there? You blushed at the thought.

“Hey y/n” Nesta smiled.

“Hi”

“We were thinking about going out tonight would you like to join us?” She said the smile never leaving her beautiful face.

“Uhm… I don’t think so I’m tired” you replied and she snorted.

“No you’re not, you are shy and scared of these brutes. I promise I won’t leave your side.”

You thought about it. She was right you weren’t tired, and you noticed how the males flinched when she said that you are scared of them, their faces flashed with a pained expression. Even though they were huge they seemed kind and caring in a way that made your heart swell. You saw how Cassian acted with Nesta, his features always turning soft when he glanced at her and his voice dropping down a notch when she is around. They seemed to respect females and going out with them didn’t sound so bad, especially when they could protect you from any other harm.

“Okay” you nodded.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You didn’t know how you ended up in this situation. After arguing with Nesta for more than an hour you gave up, she was unbearable. She was trying to persuade you to wear something else than your usual pale blue dresses. She didn’t like them and she wanted you to try some dresses that belonged to her. At one point you had enough and with a huff you took the dresses from her and tried them on. She didn’t allow you to see yourself before she was finished. And when she did and guided you in front of the mirror your jaw dropped, you couldn’t recognise yourself. You were wearing a short midnight black dress that hugged your curves in all the right places, it had a deep v cut at the front that reached bellow your breasts, and she made you wear boots that reached over your knees.

“Wow” was all that you could say.

“Perfect right?” She giggled.

“Thank you so much, I look amazing!” You were staring at yourself with a wide grin.

“I can’t wait to see Az’s reaction” she clapped and you froze.

“What do you mean?” You asked.

“Oh you haven’t noticed? He definitely has a crush on you”

You blushed. He was a stunning male you had noticed that the moment you saw him and how could you not; he was made from sin and darkness, the powerful aura around him could bring any female to her knees. You had thought about it to be honest, kneeling in front of him and surrendering your body at his mercy.

You blushed harder at the thought. The things you would let him do to you If only you weren’t scared of him. The roses he left you though showed that maybe he could be romantic and soft.

You shook your head and followed Nesta not sure where because you didn’t hear a single thing she said as you were lost deep in thoughts. You reached the balcony and found Azriel and Cassian, they were dressed casually now, their outfits making them look more approachable -still intimidating though.

Azriel was staring at you, a blush creeping in his face as he followed every curve of your body until he reached your eyes.

“Uhm… have you….Uhm have you ever flew before?” He was stuttering earning a surprised look from Cassian.

“No” you shook your head feeling more comfortable now.

“Okay, so… I have to pick you up, are you okay with me placing one hand under your waist and the other under your knees?” The stutter was gone, yet his voice remained soft and he was fidgeting. You glanced at Nesta, Cassian was holding her in his arms the same way as Azriel explained. She gave you a nod and smiled.

“Yeah, I guess…” you muttered and moved closer to him. Cauldron, he was huge. He crouched and stretched his hand.

“I’m placing my hand behind your knees” he informed and then you felt it “and now behind your back” you felt that too. “I will pick you up now” he said but didn’t move. You glanced at him and he was staring at you waiting for your approval. You nodded.

“Words angel” he said and you felt like fainting because of the nickname.

“Y-yes”

And with that he picked you up and nodded at Cassian, they both stretched their wings and with two long strides they took off. You didn’t feel fear, you were so small that his body was covering yours entirely so you only felt him, not the void beneath you. And for the first time since you met him you felt comfortable by his size, it was making you feel safe. In addition to that, the way he made sure that you were okay with him touching you made your heart melt.

The flight was silent, and as you landed he softly placed you at your feet again, before quickly moving backwards. He was trying to not scare you away and you smiled thankfully.

You entered a bar called Rita’s and followed Nesta towards a booth. Nesta sat on one of the couches and Cassian slipped next to her trying to make his wings fit. You sat on the other couch and Azriel took a seat next to you doing the same as Cassian. One of his wings bumped into you and his thigh pressed against your own. He sent you an apologetic look “It’s the only way to fit here…do you want me to find another seat?”

You gaped at him. “No no it’s okay don’t worry”

He smiled and turned his attention to Cassian. They started talking about their missions and stuff Rhysand had asked them to do making both you and Nesta bored. They noticed after a while and Cassian moved closer to her, kissing her neck and whispering in her ear.

You didn’t know what to do so you glanced at Azriel, he was already looking at you.

“Do you like the house?” He asked.

“Yeah it’s okay, I really love the library”

“It is something else right? So many books..” he chuckled.

“Yes I can’t just pick one, I felt lost today every time one caught my attention I would see another better one”

“Well you have all the time you need to read everything” he paused. “If you decide to stay of course”

“I think I already made the decision when I came here” you laughed.

“Right well I’m glad, I want you to stay” he blurted out and blushed as he realised what he said.

“How is living here like? I mean except of Rita’s where else would someone go to have fun?” you questioned.

“There are many places, taverns, bakeries, coffee shops and also places in the nature, there’s actually one field next to the Sidra it’s amazing… it’s filled with sparkling flowers and you can see every part of Velaris.” He looked like he was daydreaming about this place.

“Maybe you can show it to me sometime” you smiled and his eyes widened.

“Of course, do you want to go now?”

You glanced at Cassian and Nesta, they were making out and you could swear that you smelled their arousal. You wrinkled your nose and turned back to Azriel.

“Yes please” the look of despair made him throw his head back as he laughed.

“Let’s go” he stood up and offered you his hand, you gladly took it and followed him outside. Nesta and Cassian were still swallowing each other’s faces and didn’t even notice that the two of you left. Once you were outside Azriel let go of your arm and said “I have to pick you up again”

“Okay” you shrugged and this time moved more confidently towards him placing your hand behind his neck as he crouched. He quirked an eyebrow but didn’t say anything as he swiftly picked you up and shoot off.

“I think I can get used to this” you shouted over the wind making him smile.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The field was indeed beautiful, the flowers sparkled, the only sound was coming from Sidra… the water flowing and splashing against the mountain rocks.

The view of the city took your breath away, the city was full of beautiful lights and buildings and the sky around it was decorated with stars of almost every colour.

“It’s beautiful” you whispered.

“I know, I come here when I need to calm down or think.” His voice was once again soft.

“Oh I’m sorry, you didn’t have to bring me here, I don’t want to invade your privacy” you gasped.

“No it’s okay, I wanted to bring you here.” He smiled.

You were sitting on the ground, staring at the beautiful city and talking about your past. You were crying as he told you about his childhood and then you were laughing at the stories he told you about him and his brothers.

Then, you told him about your own past and the things you saw during the war, his jaw was ticking every time you mentioned one of the warriors raping a priestess.

“Did anyone touch you?” He asked when you were done speaking.

“No, I was the youngest so the other priestesses would hide me when the warriors came” you teared up.

“I won’t ever let anyone touch you, and if we ever come across one of those males I will make them beg for mercy” his voice became lethal as he spoke and his gaze was so intense that it woke something in you. You couldn’t understand the feeling, it was a tightening of your chest and then it snapped.

You gasped. He only smiled and nodded his head.

“You knew?” You asked.

“From the moment I saw you” his smile was warm and full of care.

“Is it okay if I touch you?” He questioned and you nodded.

“Words angel” he said once again and this time the nickname made your heart beat faster and you grinned.

“Yes, touch me please”

His hand moved and caressed your jaw, he leaned closer and stared at your lips.

“Kiss me please” you whispered and he chuckled.

“Good girl” he said and captured your lips with his own.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Azriel was taking things slow... every day he would leave a blue rose somewhere in the house for you to find. Sometimes he would leave a new book on your pillow and a blue rose next to it. You got used to his size and it even became one of your favourite things about him. It made you feel safe and comfortable.

So, a few months later you waited for him to come back from one of his missions with a plate of food you made for him and a blue rose.

Requests are open! If you don't like it you can always ask me to rewrite it, I won't get offended!

675 notes · View notes

thewulf · 1 month

Text

Frosted Steel || Cassian

Summary: Request -Can i request a Cassian x Reader?? Here's what I'm thinking-Reader is from winter court. She's gifted with unique ice-binding magic from her home and arrives in Velaris to help Rhysand finalize a critical peace treaty?... Read Rest Here

A/N: Well... this one got away from me hahaha but I had a blast writing it. Def in the zone writing these ACOTAR fics so please keep sending them my way!

Pairing: Cassian x Female Reader (Winter Court Reader)

Word Count: 9.8k + (WHOOPS)

TW: swords, reader gets cut, blood, general ACOTAR warnings

In the silent, shimmering halls of the Winter Court you stood before Kallias, your father and the formidable High Lord. His piercing blue eyes reflect both concern and determination as he addresses you. The throne room was usually a place of austere beauty but felt colder today. The frost patterns on the walls mirroring the tension in the air.

"Velaris is not just another city, and this is not merely a diplomatic visit my daughter," Kallias begins. His voice resonant and commanding. "Rhysand needs our support to finalize a peace treaty that could stabilize relations of the Winter Court for generations. I need someone who can represent our interests with both power and delicacy. Someone like you."

You shift slightly with your boots whispering against the icy floor. "But father, my magic is suited for creation not conflict. Surely there are others better suited to navigate the intricacies of a peace treaty?" You tried your best to convince him, but it was sure to fall of deaf ears. When he had a plan there was no talking him out of it.

Kallias rises. His height and presence filling the room with an almost tangible force. "No one else possesses your unique abilities or your perspective," he insists. "You understand the fragile nature of peace. This treaty needs more than just political acumen… it needs the trust and bond that only your magic can foster." You knew exactly what he was doing. He was trying to flatter you. You lowered your gaze knowing there was no talking him out of this. You felt the weight of his expectations pressing into you. It is an honor yes, but a daunting one, nonetheless. The responsibility feels as heavy as the ice that clings to the peaks of your homeland.

Seeing your hesitation Kallias softens before stepping down from the dais to place a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "I would not ask this of you if I did not believe in your ability to carry our hopes," he says. His tone infused with a rare warmth. "You have always risen to the challenges presented to you, greater though they may seem."

Drawing a deep breath you nod, accepting the mantle he's offering. "I will go to Velaris. I will help broker this peace." You spoke even though you truly did not want to go.

Kallias smiles with pride evident in his eyes. "Rhysand has arranged for an escort to meet you at the city gates. They will ensure your safety and aid in your acclimation to the Night Court's ways. Spend some time there. Get to know them. It will only aid in our recovery efforts after the war.” As you turn to leave your heart steadies itself. The path ahead is uncertain and is filled with potential alliances and hidden perils. But as the frost air fills your lungs you feel your resolve harden. You will meet this challenge as you have met all others with the cool grace and quiet strength of winter itself.

He didn’t give you long to get ready to leave. Within a day you were already finding yourself at the outskirts of Velaris, the once hidden city of the Night Court. As you step through the threshold into the city your senses are immediately overwhelmed by the vivid contrasts. Unlike the icy, silent elegance of your homeland, Velaris pulses with life. Its streets bustling with faeries of every conceivable form and hue. The air here carries the warmth of starlight even into the night. It was a stark contrast to the crisp, cold air of the Winter Court. Your unique ice-binding magic was a rare gift in your cold dominion, and it stirred within you responding to the latent energies of this foreign land.

Your arrival isn't just a mere visit as your father had informed you. It's a mission charged with the weight of potential peace or conflict. Directed by your father you are here to assist Rhysand, the famed High Lord of the Night Court and one you were incredibly intimidated by, in finalizing the critical peace treaty. The responsibility weighs heavily on your shoulders as the outcome could define the future relationships between your frigid realm and the temperate lands of the Night Court.

As you glide through the throngs of fae your eyes marvel at the architectural wonders of Velaris. The buildings around you display intricate designs that emit an ethereal glow, seeming both ancient and vibrantly alive. Despite the surrounding beauty you remain vigilant, your magic at the ready. Your heart beats a complex rhythm of excitement and caution as you near the meeting point. In Velaris, amidst allies and strangers, you must navigate the intricacies of court politics. Utilizing your magical talents for diplomacy and perhaps learn to defend yourself in more ways than one.

However, a different sensation stirs within you—a blend of nervousness and unease—as you anticipate your first encounter with Rhysand and Feyre. Both are Daemati, a kind of power that deeply unsettles you. This fear stems from a harrowing past encounter with a Daemati under Amarantha's command who had mercilessly killed twelve children of the Winter Court. One of these children was your Ivy. She was a young fae you were mentoring. Ivy, like yourself, possessed potent abilities but her promise was brutally cut short. She was a loss that still haunts you to this day.

Now as you approach the House of Wind with your escort a mix of fear and determination tingles through your nerves. You replay the pain of your past and the loss that continuously gnaws at your spirit. Yet, you steady yourself with the knowledge that your father has prepared you well to shield your thoughts. He had trained you relentlessly once he returned from under the mountain. At the time it frustrated you but now, in this moment, you are profoundly grateful for his persistence.

Rhysand and Feyre greet you at the grand entrance. Their presence was both awe-inspiring and intimidating. Rhysand's dark hair and piercing gaze are balanced by a surprisingly warm smile. While Feyre's poise and grace exude a calm strength. Though their reputations are fair and just leaders precede them you can't shake the lingering trepidation of their unique abilities.

"Welcome to Velaris," Rhysand says. His voice both smooth and inviting. "We are honored to assist the Winter Court in these crucial talks."

You manage a polite nod making sure to keep your mental shields tightly woven, an invisible armor against any potential intrusion. Rhysand’s eyes seem to glimmer with a hint of understanding, but he makes no move to address the unspoken tension.

Feyre then steps forward with a gentle smile. Her empathy palpable even without words. "We hope you find comfort here during your stay. If there's anything you need at all, please let us know."

As they lead you through the corridors of their home filled with the light of glowing crystals and the scent of night-blooming flowers you remind yourself of the mission at hand. You are here to negotiate peace. To secure a future for your court. Despite the warmth of their welcome, you remain vigilant, prepared to protect your thoughts and heart from the painful memories of the past and the daunting power of the present.

After showing you to your room, a beautiful space with a view of Velaris that twinkles like a starlit sky, Feyre gently suggests that you join them for dinner. As you follow her down to the dining area your nervousness manifests subtly. Your leg shakes rhythmically, a silent tick showing the unease churning inside you. The room is beautifully set with candles flickering softly. They cast a warm light over the array of dishes that smell of spices and something sweetly floral.

You take your seat making sure to deliberately avoid the gazes of Rhysand and Feyre who try to make the atmosphere as welcoming as possible. Your leg continues to shake under the table and despite their friendly demeanor you find yourself unable to meet their eyes. You choose instead to focus on the intricate patterns of the tablecloth. You felt terribly out of your element. Why had your father sent you here? You couldn’t even look them in the eyes, how were you going to negotiate peace with them?

Noticing your discomfort Rhysand addresses the elephant in the room with a gentle directness. "It must be quite unsettling being far from home and surrounded by strangers. Especially strangers who possess abilities that might seem... invasive. We both understand the significance of mental privacy and consent," he begins. His tone imbued with empathy. His acknowledgment of his and Feyre's Daemati powers catches your attention prompting you to glance up briefly.

"We're committed to using our powers to protect and heal, never to harm or coerce," Rhysand continues hoping to ease your worry. "It's a rule we hold sacred in Velaris. A promise to each other and to those we welcome into our home."

As Rhysand speaks there is a sincerity radiating with each word. You find the courage to lift your eyes and meet his gaze for the first time this evening. Something in his expression, a deep-seated earnestness, cuts through the fog of your apprehension. You nod slowly acknowledging his pledge and the safety it promises.

"Thank you," you speak quietly. "I've heard much about both of you and your abilities. Forgive me for being so… cold." The smirk that follows is light and tinged with the irony of your homeland's icy reputation.

Your gaze shifts between Rhysand and Feyre. Their attentive postures encouraging you to continue. "The reason for my caution," you explain, "stems from a… an awful experience. One of the children taken by Amarantha's enforcer was under my protection. Her name was Ivy. I was supposed to shield her. Protect her. To nurture her abilities. But I could only watch helpless as her mind was torn apart. Piece by piece. It was... traumatizing to say the least. The fear of that power. The fear of it being used again so mercilessly has stayed with me." You let out the breath you were holding feeling a weight being slowly lifted off your shoulders in your admission.

Taking a deep breath, you fight through the tide of emotion threatening to overwhelm you. "Ivy was more than just a pupil to me. She was like a daughter," you begin. Your voice trembling as the words spill out. “Young and brilliant. Her very presence could brighten the darkest winter nights. She had a rare gift for ice magic. The kind that comes once in a generation. Ivy could weave frost into intricate sculptures of breathtaking beauty. She could coax snowflakes into patterns that told stories. Her magic wasn’t just powerful, it was art. Art in the purest and most captivating form."

Your voice cracks as the memory surges forward, raw, and as sharp as the day it happened. "When the enforcer came, I tried to shield her. I stood between them. I begged him to take me instead. But he just laughed..." Your hands clench into fists at the memory with you nails digging into your palms as if to anchor you against the pain. "And then he turned his attention to her. Ivy was just a girl. A beautiful little girl brimming with potential, and I had to watch from a distance… utterly powerless, as he ripped it all away. Her screams... the look of sheer terror in her eyes... it's etched into my memory. A nightmare that never fades."

Pausing, you swallow hard, feeling the sting of tears as they threaten to breach your composure. "I couldn't save her. The guilt of that moment, the utter helplessness. It’s haunted me ever since." You wipe away a tear that manages to escape, your voice a whisper now. "That’s why I’m so wary around Daemati. That’s why your powers… even though I know you use them for good, initially stirred such deep fear in me. The memory of what was done with similar abilities. It terrifies me still."

As you finish the room is enveloped in a heavy silence. Rhysand and Feyre absorbing the depth of your pain. Each of their faces etched with compassion and sorrow for your loss. Feyre's reaction is immediate and visceral. Her eyes fill with tears, and they silently overflow as she listens to the end of your harrowing experience. Moved deeply by your pain and the horrific loss of Ivy, she can barely contain her distress, reflecting her profound empathy.

"I'm so sorry," Feyre whispers. Her voice quivering as she reaches across the table, seeking to provide comfort even as she struggles with her own reaction. "That you had to go through that, to witness such horror... it's just unthinkable. I can't express how deeply sorry I am for your loss and your pain."

Rhysand's expression is one of solemn resolve as he observes both you and Feyre. He places a reassuring hand on her shoulder offering her a silent strength before turning his attention to you with a serious yet compassionate gaze. "What happened to Ivy, the terror she endured—such things are what we fight against every day," he says firmly. "Under my watch we hold ourselves to a promise: that we use our power to protect, to heal, not to harm. What you experienced will not happen here. You have my word." He nods his head in reverence.

The sincerity in Rhysand's voice and his protective assurance coupled with Feyre's empathetic tears create a poignant moment of understanding and solidarity. It offers a small yet significant reassurance that in Velaris you might find not only safety but also allies who genuinely care about your well-being.

As dinner progresses the conversation gradually shifts towards lighter topics. Focusing on the details of the peace treaty. The atmosphere has eased significantly with Rhysand and Feyre both engaging in thoughtful dialogue about the future plans and the roles each court might play in fostering peace. You find yourself becoming more invested in the conversation feeling a bit more at ease with each passing moment.

Just as you're beginning to relax fully the door bursts open and two figures storm in, deep in a heated debate. Their voices are raised, each trying to overpower the other with their arguments.

“You think charging in without a plan is the answer, Cassian? That’s reckless, even for you,” the darker-haired one asserts, his expression intense and clearly frustrated.

“And you think waiting around is going to solve our problems, Az? We can’t just leave it unresolved!” the larger man retorts with his broad frame gesturing emphatically.

Rhysand sighs, setting down his utensils before looking between his two friends. “Alright, what’s this about?” he asks, ready to mediate with a practiced ease.

As Cassian and Azriel's loud entrance interrupted the dinner your eyes immediately locked with Cassian's. Despite the intensity of their ongoing argument something about his direct gaze halted all other thoughts. It was as if a gust of wind had swept through the room, leaving you momentarily breathless. Amidst the unexpected disruption the corner of your mouth quirked up in amusement. Such candid, boisterous dynamics were a rare sight back in the Winter Court and the sheer openness of it all struck you as refreshingly odd. Even as the argument continued your focus remained riveted on Cassian. You found it impossible to break away from his gaze, his eyes holding a mixture of passion and warmth that was intensely captivating.

Catching your amused smile, Cassian halts mid-sentence. A playful glint appearing in his eyes. “And who do we have here?” he asks. His tone shifting to one of curiosity mixed with a hint of charm. “A spy from the Winter Court come to watch us squabble like market hagglers?”

Azriel rolls his eyes at Cassian’s dramatics. “Ignore him. Cassian thinks every new face is part of a grand intrigue.”

Rhysand chuckles and intervenes before Cassian can respond. “No spies here, just Kallias’s daughter from the Winter Court. She’s here to assist with the peace treaty negotiations. Remember?” Rhysand explains gesturing toward you with a warm smile. “And apparently to witness the Night Court's General and Spymaster in their, let’s say, natural habitat.”

Cassian’s face lights up with a broad grin as he extends a hand in greeting. His earlier fervor now redirected into welcoming you. “Well then, welcome to Velaris! I’m Cassian, the General. And the brooding shadow over there is Azriel, our Spymaster. Seems you’ve got a front-row seat to our tactical disputes.”

Azriel gives you a nod, his earlier annoyance fading into a reserved smile. "It’s good to meet you. Please don’t mind us. We argue, but it’s all in the spirit of making the best decisions for our people."

Your initial amusement grows into a genuine smile, touched by the warmth and candidness of their welcome, even amidst their lively disputes. This evening has certainly turned out to be full of surprises. Painting a vivid picture of the Night Court as a place of vibrant personalities and fierce loyalty.

As the energy from their spirited discussions simmers down and the laughter echoes into a comfortable lull you take the opportunity to express your amusement at their robust debate. Greeting Cassian and Azriel warmly you share how refreshing you find the candid nature of the Night Court. It's a stark contrast to the more reserved and formal interactions typical of the Winter Court, sparking your curiosity about the dynamics of this lively group.

"Well, it's certainly different here," you comment with a light laugh. "I'm looking forward to seeing more of this... enthusiasm during my stay. I'll be here for a month or so. I hope to learn as much as I can."

Rhysand, seizing on your mention of an extended stay, exchanges a quick glance with Cassian. He gave him a sly smile as he senses his brothers attention shifting toward you almost immediately. "A month or so gives us plenty of time," he says thoughtfully. "If you're interested in learning more than just politics perhaps you'd like to join some of our training sessions? Cassian here leads our warriors and I'm sure he could arrange something that accommodates your skills and interests."

Cassian’s eyes light up at the suggestion. He was always eager to bring someone new into the fold of his training regimens. Especially someone as unique as you seemed to be. "Absolutely," he agrees with an enthusiastic nod. "It’s not all sword swinging and strength training. We focus on strategy, agility, and even some elemental control that might align nicely with your ice magic. It could be a good way to blend some of the Winter Court techniques with ours."

As Rhysand suggests joining the training sessions you hesitate, a flicker of doubt crossing your face. "I appreciate the offer but I'm not really a fighter," you admit slightly apologetic in your nature. "My strengths lie more in diplomacy and magic, particularly ice magic. I'm not sure how well I'd fit into a warrior's training regimen."

Rhysand, observing the interplay at the table, seems particularly keen on your participation. His insight as a leader might allow him to sense the undercurrent of interest from Cassian toward you. Something potentially deeper than it appears. He pushes gently but with a knowing smile, "It’s not just about fighting. It’s about understanding different perspectives and disciplines. It could be a valuable experience."

Cassian although typically straightforward and jovially aggressive, adopts a slightly softer demeanor. His usual bravado tempered by earnestness. "Training can also be about balance and harmony. About integrating the physical with the magical. Your skills could bring a fresh perspective, not just to our tactics but to our understanding of magic and combat."

Then Azriel, who normally stays quiet in such discussions adds his own encouragement. His subdued voice carrying weight. "It’s worth exploring. Sometimes stepping into unfamiliar territory reveals more about our strengths. It could be enlightening for all of us."

Cassian's expression briefly reveals his surprise at Azriel’s interjection. It was a small, almost imperceptible lift of his eyebrows signaling to you that Azriel's encouragement is out of the ordinary. This small gesture subtly hints at the importance of the moment.

Feyre as if sensing the nuanced shifts in the conversation supports their suggestions with a warm and inclusive gesture. "It’s also a way to connect with everyone here. Our training sessions are as much about building relationships as they are about building skills. It would be wonderful to have you join, even just a few times to see how it feels."

Encouraged by their collective support and Cassian's surprised yet approving glance following Azriel's seemingly rare endorsement you find yourself reconsidering their proposal more seriously. "Alright. I'll give it a try," you agree, a tentative excitement building within you. "This will be very… interesting."

"Excellent," Cassian says. His eyes brightening with enthusiasm. "We’ll start at a pace that feels right for you. It’s about growth and learning, not just exertion."

As the dinner concludes and plans for your training begin to take shape you can't help but feel an intriguing pull towards what lies ahead. The possibility of new friendships and perhaps deeper bonds begins to form, hinting at the start of an enriching journey within the Night Court.

On your first day at the training grounds, the crisp morning air of Velaris is invigorating, filled with the sounds of clashing weapons and distant calls from sparring partners. Cassian leads you to a quieter section reserved for one-on-one sessions away from the more vigorous activities of his usual warriors. The atmosphere is slightly tense. The space between you filled with cautious curiosity. Each of you is clearly gauging the other trying to find a comfortable rhythm in this new training partnership.

"Let’s see what you’ve got," Cassian suggests. His tone friendly but carrying a hint of challenge. He watches intently as you demonstrate some basic maneuvers with your ice magic. You created delicate yet sharp frost patterns that float gracefully in the air. His nods of approval are sparing, and you can tell he’s mentally noting each display of skill though he keeps his feedback measured and professional.

As the days progress the initial stiffness that marked your interactions begins to melt away. Cassian’s coaching style is intense. His commands are sharp, his expectations high. However, as you meet his challenges with increasing confidence you begin to understand the method behind his rigor. You also start to catch glimpses of humor in his sharp eyes. A sign that there’s more to this formidable warrior than just discipline and strength.

"Try not to freeze my soldiers. We’re running out of good men as it is," he jokes one morning after you skillfully direct a swirl of ice around a training dummy skillfully stopping just short of a group of soldiers watching nearby.

With a small laugh you shoot back, "I thought the Night Court could handle a little cold."

His laughter in response is hearty. A sound that seems to echo around the quiet corner of the training grounds. It's a turning point, signaling a shift from mutual respect to something warmer, more friendly.

By the end of the week your training sessions are characterized by easy banter and playful challenges. One afternoon Cassian dodges your icy projectiles with nimble grace only to slip slightly on a patch of ice you cunningly left in his path. "Not bad for a scrawny little thing," he grins while steadying himself with the agility of a cat.

In response you flash a mischievous smile and with a subtle flick of your wrist, you freeze his boots to the ground. "And not bad for a brawny brute," you retort. Laughter bursts from a few nearby trainees who have started to look forward to these exchanges between the two of you.

Cassian manages to break free before brushing ice from his boots with mock indignation. "You’re going to pay for that one," he warns though his eyes sparkle with amusement.

As the week draws to a close the training ground has transformed from a place of cautious appraisal to one of growth and friendship. Your sessions with Cassian are no longer just about learning to integrate your ice magic with physical combat. They’re also about the laughter shared over slipped footing, the shared grins after successful maneuvers, and the light-hearted jests that now flow freely between you. This evolving camaraderie promises not just improved skills but a deepening bond, hinting at the development of a relationship built on respect, challenge, and mutual delight in each other's company.

The atmosphere at the training grounds is usually charged with the sounds of diligent practice but today there’s an added layer of excitement due to some young onlookers from the Night Court. Cassian plans a session that balances demonstrations of your unique ice magic with some basic combat techniques hoping to impress not just you but the eager young fae watching from a distance.

Wearing your elegant Winter Court attire, which was more suited for display than combat, you find yourself not in your usual training leathers. Today was supposed to be about finesse and control not full-contact sparring. As Cassian readies the next exercise you catch the eyes of the children peeking out from behind the trees. Their expressions were filled with awe and curiosity. Smiling back at them your attention momentarily drifts from the task at hand.

Cassian notices your distraction and the intricate fabric of your attire raising an eyebrow in mild concern. "Are you sure you wouldn't prefer to change into something more... practical?" he asks you once more. His voice laced with skepticism.

You shake your head while stepping forward confidently. "I believe today's session can benefit from a different approach," you explain. Your voice steady, confident. "My attire from the Winter Court is designed not only for aesthetics but for mobility in a certain style of combat. It’s more strategic and less about direct confrontation. It might offer a new perspective for your warriors."

Cassian looks dubious but intrigued by your assurance and the potential learning opportunity for his trainees. After a moment of consideration, he nods slowly. "Alright," he concedes. His tone cautious yet curious. "We'll adjust today's training to focus on technique and precision. We'll go light on the physical combat to accommodate your attire."

Grateful for his flexibility you prepare to demonstrate that finesse and strategy can be as effective as brute strength hoping to prove the value of your unique approach and the versatility of your court's combat style.

As dusk deepened over the training grounds, the session with Cassian was intensifying. He was fully focused on you, guiding, and challenging you with each swing of his blunted training blade. He did not notice Azriel's silent approach until his brother was almost beside them, landing softly. The sudden appearance of Azriel, so smooth and silent, caught your eye at the crucial moment.

Cassian, thinking you were prepared and about to dodge, continued with his planned attack and swung the blunted blade in a broad, sweeping motion towards you. Normally you would have sidestepped smoothly but distracted by Azriel's unexpected arrival you froze. The blade, though blunt for training, struck directly against your side with surprising force due to your lack of movement. The impact was hard enough to slice through the delicate fabric of your Winter Court dress and nick your skin, drawing a line of blood.

Immediately realizing the mishap Cassian dropped his sword and rushed to your side, his expression flooded with concern. "Are you alright? I thought you saw me coming," he asked quickly as his voice was laced with worry.

Trying to mask the sharp sting and the sudden warmth of blood seeping through your dress, you attempted to reassure him, "I’m okay, Cassian, really, it was just a shock more than anything—"

But as you spoke a wave of dizziness overwhelmed you, your knees buckling under the dual assault of pain and sudden faintness. As you started to fall Cassian instinctively reached out, catching you just in time. His hands which were initially meant to steady you felt the wetness of blood through the fabric of your dress. His eyes widened in horror as he saw the bright red on his hands realizing the cut was more serious than a mere scrape.

Without a moment's hesitation Cassian scooped you up into his arms. His movements were swift and filled with urgent care. He looked up at Azriel who had stepped forward, concern etching his features. "Keep the training going, Az. I’m taking her to Madja, now," Cassian instructed firmly. His voice carrying the weight of his resolve.

Azriel nodded understanding the gravity of the situation and stepped back to allow Cassian to pass. Cassian, holding you securely, moved with purposeful speed towards the infirmary. His mind was racing with worry. The flight was quick. His powerful wings beating against the cool air of the evening, each stroke propelling you further away from the training grounds and closer to the healing hands of Madja.

As he flew you clung to him feeling the cool air against your face, which helped alleviate some of the dizziness. "I'm really okay, Cassian," you tried to assure him again, your voice soft, noticing the tension in his body, the way his jaw was set with worry. "It’s just a little cut, I think. I’m sure it’s already healed up."

Cassian only tightened his hold, a gesture of protective care. "We're not taking any chances," he said firmly. His tone brooking no argument. "You’re getting checked out, no arguments."

Suspended in the air, held securely in Cassian's embrace, you noticed the tension in his expression. His jaw set firmly as he navigated through the skies. Wanting to alleviate his concern and lighten the mood you looked up at him, your voice competing with the rush of the wind. "Okay, no arguing," you conceded with a soft, reassuring smile. "But how about an even less swordy day at training tomorrow?"

"You know, maybe we should consider taking a rest day tomorrow," Cassian suggested hesitantly. His voice carrying a protective tone. "Just to be sure you're fully recovered. It might not be wise to jump right back into training."

You looked up at him feeling the warmth of his care but also a spark of your own determination not to be sidelined by a small injury. "I appreciate your concern, Cassian, but really, I feel fine," you countered quickly. A hint of stubbornness in your tone. "A light day as planned with some tactical drills. Nothing too strenuous. I think it would be good for me. For you"

Cassian raised an eyebrow with a small smile breaking through as he sensed your resolve. "Oh, how quickly you've changed your tune, princess," he remarked with a playful smirk. The affectionate tease in his voice floated on the wind as he continued to fly, his grip around you reassuring and strong.

The brief exchange brought a light-heartedness to the moment and Cassian's smile broadened slightly appreciating your spirit and resilience. "Alright, tactical drills it is then. But at the first sign of any discomfort, we're taking a break," he conceded. His tone still carrying a hint of caution but softened by his growing trust in your judgment.

As you both neared the infirmary the flight through the crisp evening air felt less like a rush to aid and more like a shared journey back to stability. Cassian's initial hesitation faded, replaced by a quiet confidence in your resilience and a deepening sense of connection between you. The city of Velaris spread out beneath you, a silent witness to the bond that was strengthening with every beat of Cassian's wings and every word exchanged above the rooftops.

Landing smoothly at the infirmary Cassian carried you inside where Madja was already preparing her tools. Cassian gently laid you down on a cot as his hands lingered for a moment longer than necessary. His eyes were searching yours for any sign of further distress.

Madja quickly assessed the situation. She cleaned the wound and confirmed it was shallow. Though the blood loss and the shock had caused your faintness. "You'll be fine. Just a little rest and you’ll be up in no time," she reassured both you and Cassian, more so Cassian, who finally allowed himself to breathe a sigh of relief.

You turn to Cass with a smirk playing on your lips. "See, told you so, General," you tease in an attempt to ease the palpable tension that had followed you from the training grounds.

Cassian's relief is immediate and visible. He lets out a deep breath, the tightness in his shoulders relaxing as he returns your smirk with a wry smile. "Fine, you were right. But let’s avoid making this a habit, shall we?"

Before you can respond the infirmary door swings open abruptly. Rhysand strides in, his expression a mixture of concern and command clearly having been summoned by Cassian’s urgent mental call. His eyes are wide as he quickly scans the room landing on you sitting relatively unscathed on the infirmary bed.

"Are you alright?" Rhysand asks. His voice tight with concern. He moves closer. His gaze flicking from you to Cassian, seeking an explanation.

You nod reassuring him with a calm smile. "I’m just fine, Rhys. Really, it was much less dramatic than it seems. Cassian has been worried enough for everyone," you say, glancing at Cassian with a playful raise of your eyebrows, signaling that all is truly well.

Rhysand's gaze softens though the lines of worry don’t completely disappear. "Cassian briefed me but seeing you well makes a world of difference. These training accidents... Well, they shouldn’t happen. We’ll review the protocols to ensure this is an isolated incident."

Turning to Cassian, Rhysand claps him on the shoulder. A gesture of support mixed with a mild reprimand. "Take care of her. Make sure she follows all of Madja’s instructions," Rhysand instructs, his leader’s tone resurfacing.

Cassian nods solemnly, "Understood. I’ll make sure this doesn’t happen again."

With a final nod and a comforting smile directed at you Rhys exits the infirmary, his presence leaving as quickly as it arrived. The room feels lighter now, the earlier tension dissipating with the confirmations of your well-being.

Cassian stays by your side. His relief evident but his watchfulness remaining. "Now, about that 'less swordy' day tomorrow..." he begins, ready to shift back into the lighter, teasing dynamic that has marked your growing friendship. Grateful that the day’s scare has ended on a reassuring note.

As Cassian suggests a less physically demanding day focused more on magic you can’t help but giggle. A slight relief moving away from any activities involving bladed weapons. “That sounds perfect,” you agree with enthusiasm brightening your voice as you discuss potential exercises that would let you showcase and refine your control over ice magic without the physical strain.

As the conversation continues Cassian helps you up ensuring you’re stable on your feet and offers his arm for support as you begin the walk back to your quarters. The corridors of the Night Court feel quieter than usual. The soft echo of your steps mingling with the fading adrenaline of the day’s events. There’s a palpable shift between you and Cassian. A new layer of closeness brought on not just by the day’s scare but also by the accumulated time spent together over the past few weeks.

Cassian’s voice breaks the comfortable silence. His voice softer, more reflective than before. “I’ve really enjoyed these last few weeks with you,” he admits. His gaze fixed ahead. “You’ve taught me more than you’ll ever know.” His words hang in the air laden with a sincerity that draws your attention fully to his expression. It’s open, honest, and there’s a hint of vulnerability there that you hadn’t noticed before.

You look at him, touched by his confession, noticing the slight hesitance as if he wants to say more but is holding back. Maybe it’s the fear of crossing an unseen boundary or the uncertainty of your reaction that keeps him from continuing.

Encouraged by his openness you respond warmly, “And I’ve learned a lot from you, too, Cassian. Not just about fighting or training but about what it means to really care about your warriors, your friends.” You pause searching his face for a reaction. “It means a lot to me, all of this time we’ve spent together.”

Cassian’s eyes meet yours and there’s a moment of silent communication. A mutual understanding and appreciation that seems to deepen the bond between you. “I’m glad,” he finally says with his voice low. “I hope we can keep this going, no matter what the training schedule says.”

As you reach your quarters there’s a reluctance to part between the both of you. A desire to prolong the connection that has clearly grown beyond the confines of instructor and trainee. Cassian lingers at your door, his usual confidence tempered with a newfound tenderness.

“Get some rest princess,” he says softly before stepping back with a reluctant smile. “We’ll start fresh tomorrow. Less swordy, more... magical.”

You nod, smiling back at him, feeling a warmth that extends beyond the fading pain from your injury. “I look forward to it, Cassian. Thank you for everything today.”

He nods, then turns to leave, but not before throwing a look over his shoulder. It was a promise of more shared moments, more lessons, and perhaps, deeper revelations yet to come. The door closes softly behind you leaving you with a sense of anticipation for what the next day might bring, both in training and in your evolving relationship with Cassian.

After the incident at the training grounds and a night of rest you dive back into the treaty negotiations with renewed focus. As the talks commence you are at the forefront, your diplomatic skills shining as you navigate the complexities of the discussions. Your adept use of magic not only impresses but also serves as a poignant reminder of the Winter Court's strengths and capabilities. The treaty talks progress smoothly and a successful agreement begins to take shape much to the relief and satisfaction of all parties involved.

However, despite the importance of the negotiations and your central role in them your thoughts intermittently drift to Cassian. The memory of his concerned eyes, his protective stance, and the warmth of your conversation lingers with you, distracting you more than you'd like to admit. As you mentally rehearse your next points in the discussion, you find your mind replaying moments from the training sessions, his laughter, his teasing remarks, and his unexpectedly gentle care.

Unbeknownst to you, your mental shields—usually so meticulously maintained—begin to slip slightly amid your daydreams. Rhysand, who was not actively probing but is always somewhat attuned to the emotional and mental state of those around him, picks up on your wandering thoughts. He catches snippets of your internal musings about Cassian, not enough to grasp the full context but enough to piece together the gist of your distraction.

Throughout the meeting a knowing grin slowly forms on Rhysand's face, amused by the realization of your burgeoning feelings for his brother. He doesn't comment on it during the talks. Making sure to maintain his professionalism and focusing on the successful closure of the treaty. However, the little smile that occasionally plays at the corners of his mouth doesn't go unnoticed by those who know him well.

Later, as the meeting concludes with handshakes and a collective sigh of relief over the treaty's ratification. Rhysand pulls Cassian aside just before your evening training session. In a quiet corner away from prying ears Rhysand's grin broadens.

"I think someone has managed to catch more than just your training expertise," Rhysand teases as his eyes twinkled with mirth. "Our Winter Court princess seems to be a bit distracted by a certain general." As Rhysand delivers his playful revelation, Cassian's initial surprise quickly shifts to a broad, almost uncontrollable grin that spreads across his face. The sudden display of joy is uncharacteristic of the usually composed general, revealing just how deeply the news has affected him.

"Oh? And what makes you say that?" Cassian tries to maintain a semblance of composure, but his voice betrayed a hint of excitement beneath the casual façade.

Rhysand notices the change in Cassian's demeanor. The light in his eyes that hadn't been there moments before. "Well, let's just say that her thoughts were a little less guarded than usual," Rhysand replied. His voice laced with amusement. "She might be more interested in the person teaching her than just the lessons themselves."

Cassian's smile widens and he shakes his head slightly almost in disbelief but clearly delighted by the prospect. "Is that so?" he murmurs more to himself than to Rhysand, his mind already spinning with the implications.

Rhysand watches Cassian's bright grin, a knowing look crossing his face as he teases, "Seems like those training sessions are about more than just tactics and spells."

Cassian’s expression remains upbeat but a hint of seriousness creeps in. "They’re enlightening," he admits while giving a nod. "There’s something unique about her… beyond just her skills."

Sensing the depth in Cassian’s tone, Rhysand's demeanor shifts slightly, becoming more contemplative. "Just be careful, Cass. It’s easy to let your guard down when strong feelings are involved."

Cassian pauses as he felt a weight in Rhysand's caution. He looks at his brother, a silent plea for understanding without words. Rhysand, ever perceptive, senses the depth of Cassian’s feelings, realizing this might be more than just a fleeting fascination. "Cassian, do you think she could be…" Rhysand trails off leaving the implication hanging in the air, heavy with the weight of possibilities. His question is subtle, probing—asking if Cassian feels the deep, fated connection of a mate.

Cassian meets Rhysand's gaze with his own eyes reflecting a mix of hope and uncertainty. "I don’t know," he confesses softly. "But there’s something there. Something that feels… right. More than I've felt before."

Rhysand nods slowly as he processed this new revelation. His initial caution softens into a more supportive stance. "Then take it seriously but carefully. If this is what I think it might be, it’s not just significant for you but could be for the Night Court as well."

He places a hand on Cassian’s shoulder with a firm, reassuring grip. "Follow your heart but keep your head with you. She’s not just any visitor. She could and is likely to be much more."

As Rhysand walks away leaving Cassian to ponder the future the conversation not only cements Cassian's resolve but also clarifies the stakes. It’s a turning point. Marking a shift from casual interest to considering the profound potential of a deep, lifelong bond. Cassian feels empowered and cautious now acutely aware of the significant path that might be unfolding before him. This is no longer about training or simple affection. It could be the beginning of the rest of his life, your life.

As dusk settles over Velaris with the fading sunlight casting long shadows across the training grounds, Cassian awaits your arrival. His mind a jumbled swirl of thoughts from the earlier conversation with Rhysand. His anticipation is palpable, heightened by the significant discussions about feelings and futures that may be closer than he's admitted to himself.

During that first meeting in the dining hall his mind was a whirlwind of emotions. As he and Azriel entered mid-argument his initial focus was entirely on their spirited debate not the important dinner he was walking into. The sudden sight of you was an unexpected and striking presence. You brought a sharp halt to his thoughts.

Cassian was immediately struck by your poise and the quiet confidence with which you held yourself among such esteemed company. His first impression was of your elegance and the serene way you observed the dynamic entrance he and Azriel made. There was something about the way you carried yourself as a blend of strength and grace that captivated him instantly.

Embarrassment quickly flooded him with a blush creeping up his neck as he realized the discordant note their arrival struck in the otherwise serene setting. There you were, seated elegantly among the dignitaries of the Night Court with an aura of quiet confidence radiating from you. Despite the potentially disruptive entrance your expression remained unflustered. The slight, knowing smirk playing at the corners of your lips, and the amusement twinkling in your eyes spoke volumes. It was clear you were not only unfazed by the raucous disruption but also mildly entertained by it.

What struck Cassian more deeply was the way your attention seemed focused solely on him, as if the room and its other occupants had faded into the background. This singular focus, paired with the amused arch of your brow, left him feeling both exposed and intrigued. It was as if you could see right through to his typically hidden insecurities prompting a mix of vulnerability and a compelling desire to engage further.

Cassian felt a twinge of chagrin for not having presented a more composed entrance. Especially in front of someone who commanded such a presence as you did. The initial embarrassment, however, slowly morphed into a quiet determination. He was keenly aware that he had an opportunity to make a more meaningful second impression. One that could perhaps intrigue and draw you in just as you had captivated him from that first shared glance.

As he moved to regain his composure, smoothing back his hair, and adjusting his jacket, Cassian was already plotting how to transform this awkward beginning into an opening for deeper connection. The evening had just begun, and he was determined to show you a side of him that resonated with the depth and discernment he now saw reflected in your gaze.

When Rhysand later suggested that Cassian take the lead on your physical training, he seized the opportunity without hesitation. Training was his domain where he felt most in command and most himself. He anticipated that in the structure and discipline of physical training, among the straightforwardness of drills and exercises, there might be space for more informal interactions. For laughter and light conversations that could bridge the gap between formal dining hall introductions and a genuine connection.

Cassian saw each upcoming session as a canvas. As an opportunity to impress and engage you, not just with his skills but with his insights and his approach to teaching and leadership. Privately he knew he’d have to thank Rhysand for the suggestion—whether it was a calculated move or just a fortuitous throwaway idea, it had given him a golden opportunity to explore the potential that he sensed bubbling beneath your initial poised exterior.

He was intrigued, more so than he had been for a long time. The initial physical attraction was strong. Yet it was your demeanor, the intriguing mix of diplomacy and candor, that truly piqued his interest. Cassian left the dining hall that evening with his mind full of questions and curiosities about you. He was eager for the next opportunity to interact and perhaps to understand the compelling figure you were beyond just the surface.

From the memories of that first dinner to the present moment on the training grounds, Cassian's journey of understanding and admiration for you had woven through weeks of anticipation and subtle discoveries. Each interaction had added layers to his initial perception, enriching the image he held of you in his mind.

Then as if to punctuate his thoughts you appeared for the training session, garbed unmistakably in Illyrian warrior attire. Much different than the training leathers and Winter Court apparel he had grown used to see you in. The traditional leathers of his people clung to you, accentuating both strength and grace in your every move. The sight of you in such commanding attire sent a jolt through Cassian. His reaction visceral and immediate. His eyes widened with a mixture of surprise and admiration flashing across his face as he took in every detail—the way the leather fit you, how it moved with your body, and the undeniable air of confidence it brought to your demeanor.

The transformation was not just in your appearance but in the energy you exuded. Standing there you embodied the strength and resilience of an Illyrian warrior, qualities that resonated deeply with Cassian’s own identity. It struck him then how seamlessly you seemed to integrate into his world. How naturally you adopted its symbols and its strength. This was no longer just about training or sharing skills. It was a visual affirmation of your integration into his life and culture.

As he approached you his initial shock gave way to a profound respect. The way you carried the weight of the armor, the casual yet respectful nod you gave him as he walked up. These small actions spoke volumes. Cassian felt a renewed sense of connection. A deeper bond forming not just from shared interests and conversations but from seeing you embrace a part of his heritage with such ease and honor.

In that moment as he closed the distance between you, Cassian realized how deeply he was drawn to you, far beyond the physical allure. It was your spirit. Your willingness to step into his world, to don the armor of his people and stand ready to engage on equal footing. This realization brought a warmth to his chest and a smile to his lips. One that was both proud and welcoming.

As you stood before Cassian in the Illyrian warrior attire your presence was a striking blend of determination and slight apprehension. The soft evening light cast long shadows across the training grounds accentuating the quiet resolve in your posture. You were about to propose a change to the day’s lighter, planned routine. While confident in your suggestion there was a hint of nervousness tinged your voice, reflecting the care you took in challenging the agenda.

"Um, Cassian," you started, your voice carrying a cautious undertone, "I know we planned for a less sword-intensive session today..." You paused trying to gather your thoughts. But before you could continue your eyes met Cassian’s, their intensity like a direct challenge, causing a sudden vulnerability to flutter in your stomach. His gaze was penetrating, studying you with a warmth and focus that unnerved you. For a moment the confidence you felt started to waver under his scrutiny. The depth of his attention making you want to melt into a puddle right there on the training grounds.

However, drawing a deep breath, you summoned your resolve. Despite the shake in your confidence, you pressed on bolstered by the knowledge that this was an important step in your training. "I feel fine. But I've been thinking. I'm already quite familiar with my magic, and not as much with swordsmanship." Your voice grew slightly firmer as you continued, "Maybe, if it’s alright, we could incorporate more of that?" As you reached the end of your proposal a slight stammer betrayed your nervousness. "If you're okay with that, that is," you added with a nervous smile. Eager yet uncertain of his response.

Cassian, still somewhat in awe of your striking appearance and the commanding aura you exuded in the traditional leathers was momentarily taken aback. His response was on the tip of his tongue, an agreement forming, when Azriel quietly joined the duo. Observing the scene, Azriel noted your determined stance and Cassian’s admiring gaze. A knowing smirk crept onto Azriel’s face. "Looks like she’s going to give you a run for your money, brother," he teased unable to hide the amusement in his voice.

Cassian was caught between his brother's teasing and your challenging proposal but managed to regain his composure. He cleared his throat and stepped forward, his confidence rekindled by the familiar banter and the prospect of a spirited training session. "Alright then," he agreed with a nod. A smile breaking through as he embraced the challenge, "swords it is. Let’s see what you’ve got."

As the session progressed Azriel lingered on the sidelines, his eyes shifting between the clashing swords and Cassian’s animated instructions. Every now and then he couldn’t resist throwing in a light-hearted jab especially when it seemed like Cassian was particularly impressed by your quick learning curve or deft movements. "Careful, Cass, I think she might just outdo you in your own game," Azriel called out after a particularly skillful maneuver from you. His tone teasing but proud of you.

Cassian shot a mock-glare at Azriel, but his eyes sparkled with humor and something softer, an undeniable delight in your prowess and enthusiasm. Despite himself Cassian found that he enjoyed this, the mix of training intensity and the undercurrent of playful rivalry. Not just between him and you but with Azriel's involvement as well. It felt oddly, natural. You’d found a way to integrate yourself into the court within only a month of being in Velaris.

Throughout the training Cassian’s admiration for you only grew. Every block, every parry you performed with increasing confidence seemed to not only impress him but also deepen the sense of connection that he felt. This wasn’t just about teaching you how to handle a sword. It was about sharing a piece of his world, his passion, and seeing you embrace it with such fervor was both exhilarating and endearing.

As the sun dipped below the horizon Azriel’s teasing remarks faded into the background, replaced by a quiet acknowledgment of the shift he saw in Cassian. It was clear to him that his brother was, indeed, in trouble. But in the best possible way. Cassian's usually unshakeable demeanor was softer when he looked at you, filled with a mix of pride, respect, and a burgeoning affection that went beyond the confines of the training ring.

When the session finally wound down and the cool evening air settled around, both you and Cassian were catching your breath, reveling in the afterglow of intense physical exertion. It was then that Azriel, unable to resist the opportunity for a little brotherly teasing, stepped forward. Clapping Cassian on the back with a broad grin he couldn’t help but comment, "Well, that was quite a performance. And here I thought today was supposed to be less about swords."

Cassian, still a bit winded from the session, shot Azriel a quick, warning glance. But even he couldn’t hide the amused smile that tugged at his lips, indicative of his own acknowledgment of the shift in plans. Your puzzled look darted between the two brothers catching the tail end of their dynamic, your smile mirroring Cassian's albeit with a touch of confusion.

"Less swords, more magic, but I guess plans change when you're dressed for battle," you chimed in attempting to play off Azriel's comment, still somewhat oblivious to the deeper layers of teasing.

Azriel’s smirk widened as he observed the interplay, his eyes glinting with mischief. "Absolutely, plans do change. Especially when a certain someone decides to show up looking ready to join the ranks of Illyrian warriors," he teased you, turning his gaze back to Cassian with a sly expression. "Makes a general reconsider his strategies."

Caught in the moment, you shared the origin of your attire, a light chuckle escaping you. "Feyre absolutely insisted on me wearing the traditional leathers," you explained, your smile fond as you recalled Feyre's insistence. "I thought it was just for protection, given the training. She seemed really adamant about it."

Cassian’s expression softened at this with a brief smile acknowledging the hidden hand of Rhysand in this setup. Though he connected the dots, realizing his brother's likely involvement in Feyre's insistence, he chose to keep this revelation to himself. Instead, he simply nodded, appreciating your earnestness and perhaps, deep down, thankful for the unintended push it gave him to see you in a new light—strong, capable, and utterly captivating in Illyrian leathers.

As the training session drew to a close and the night deepened around them, the playful banter and shared laughter began to ebb. Azriel's remarks, though lighthearted, had hinted at the shift he observed in the dynamics between you and Cassian. A development that seemed to promise much more than just companionship in the future.

Recognizing the cooling air and the perfect, serene evening that enveloped Velaris, Cassian suggested a leisurely walk back through the city. "How about I walk you home tonight? It's a nice evening to cool down and stretch out after training," he proposed. His voice casual but with a hopeful undertone.

Azriel caught the subtle inflection in Cassian’s tone and simply couldn’t resist one more jab, his knowing smile broadening into a full-blown, mischievous grin. "Sure, take your time," he teased, his voice rich with implication. With a final chuckle and a wink at Cassian, Azriel spread his wings and took to the skies leaving you both to the quiet of the evening streets.

Cassian walked beside you there was a thoughtful distance in his initial steps. As if he was contemplating the right words or simply savoring the shared silence. Gradually, he drew closer, his presence a comforting constant at your side. The soft lighting from the streetlamps cast gentle shadows and the faint rustle of the leaves created a backdrop that enriched the moment with a quaint, almost magical quality.

Every now and then his hand would lightly touch your arm or guide you around an uneven patch on the cobblestones. Each contact sending a quiet thrill through you. Despite the casual nature of the walk there was an undercurrent of something deeper. A thread of anticipation weaving through the air between you.

"Same time tomorrow?" Cassian finally broke the silence. His voice a blend of softness and something undefinable yet unmistakably tender.

"Definitely," you replied with your smile genuine and wide. The connection you felt with Cassian was undeniable and while you might not fully grasp the depth of his feelings, the pull towards him was strong and only growing stronger with each passing day.

When you reached your quarters Cassian lingered for a moment, his demeanor protective and gentle. He seemed reluctant to part ways, but he was satisfied to know you were safe for the night. "Make sure you rest well tonight," he said with his hand resting briefly on your back, his smile warm and lingering as he wished you a good night.

Retreating to your room, the echoes of the evening replayed in your mind. The laughter, Azriel's teasing, the soft, serious timbre of Cassian's voice asking to see you again. There was an excitement brewing within you. An eagerness for what these sessions and these new feelings might lead to. It was an intriguing mix of anticipation and a bit of nervousness, stepping into this newfound connection with Cassian, but every instinct told you it was a path worth exploring. As you settled down with thoughts of the next day’s training, and more importantly, of seeing Cassian again, it filled you with a warm sense of expectation and a quiet joy.

Permanent Taglist (Message me or comment below if you want to be added!) : @loving-and-dreaming @kmc1989 @memeorydotcom @matisse556 @buckylov3r @taygrls @ah-blossom @hardballoonlove @rosiahills22 @djs8891 @kenn-spencerswifey @guacam011y @illisea @il0vebeingdelulu @hiireadstuff @avada-kedavra-bitch-187

181 notes · View notes

azrielsdove · 29 days

Text

Forbidden Love: Lucien x IC!Member Reader

Warnings: Angst

***

You couldn’t help the way your eyes drank in the fire-haired male currently speaking to your High Lord. You sensed the animosity radiating off of Azriel and Cassian from next to you, their annoyance with the Spring Court ever present. You knew that it was wrong, that it would never work. You didn’t want to imagine the way your friends would react if they discovered your little crush on the emissary.

Lucien’s eyes drifted over to you, cold and hard. “Any new plans to attack the members of my court, assassin?” You rolled your eyes at his question, spinning the dagger you held between your fingers.

“As we have reminded you and your High Lord several times, those fae were traitors and not to be trusted. They were not true members of your court.” He scoffed at your answer, shaking his head.

“Why should we ever believe you? All these meetings consist of are you all acting holier than thou, speaking as if we should automatically trust you.” He sneered in your direction, his hatred for you and your court palpable.

“Please, spare us the melodramatics. Not only did I do my job, I kept your court and its members safe from further harm.” You smiled sweetly at him. “A thank you would be nice.”

You could almost feel the fire that radiated in his eyes before he turned back to Rhysand. “Tamlin has requested a personal meeting after Calanmai, to discuss ongoing efforts of rehabilitation at the Spring Court. Can we fit into your insufferably busy schedule?” Annoyance was dripping from his voice, as it usually got by the end of these meetings.

“I suppose I can squeeze you in. I’ll send a message with available days and times at my convenience.” Rhysand gave a smile that showed all his teeth, a deadly threat thinly vailed as a friendly gesture. Lucien gave an equally fake smile back before turning and leaving the room. Azriel and Cassian immediately flanked to Rhys’ side, prepared to fly back to Velaris and debrief. You headed towards the door Lucien had left from, tasked with making sure he didn’t try snooping around the Hewn City. You spotted a flash of red hair turning a corner and started after him.

The corridor you entered was empty, your senses immediately on high alert. Where had he gone? You scanned the alcoves as you passed, one dagger held ready in your hand. You were halfway down the hall when an arm wrapped tight around your waist,

pulling you back into the dark alcove you had just passed. You twisted in the hold until your blade was

pressed tight against your assailants neck, a strand of red hair brushing against your hand.

“Quick little thing, aren’t you?” He hummed, looking down at you with his arm still wrapped around you. You sneered up at him, pressing the blade a little harder on his neck. He chuckled against the dagger, his free hand coming up and tugging your hand away. You sheathed the weapon, placing your hands on his chest with a small smile. Lucien tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, hand cupping your face. “I’ve missed you.”

You pushed up onto your toes, lips brushing gently against his. “I bet i’ve missed you more,” you teased, blood heating at the wicked grin on his face.

“Is that so?” His hand moved to the back of your neck, angling you up to him, lips pressing hard to yours. You sighed into the kiss, the familiar warmth spreading through your body at his touch. The love and joy you felt with Lucien was unlike anything you had ever known. Your fingers dug into his shirt, clutching onto him as if he was your lifeline. His hand flattened against your back, pushing you tighter into him. You gave a small moan as Lucien’s lips moved to your neck, kissing and biting the soft skin.

This was what life should be.

The thought sent a bitter chill down your spine, body tensing in Lucien’s hold. A change he noticed instantly, pulling away to look into your eyes. “What is it, my love?” You felt the tears coming, the overwhelming emotion that attacked when you were most vulnerable.

“I wish we didn’t have to hide like this.” Your voice was small, Lucien sighing at the conversation you’ve had countless times.

“You know I would tell them all in a heartbeat,” he said, looking over you carefully. “My position in the Spring Court means nothing to me, if it came to that. The only thing that matters is you.” Your throat tightened at his words, the love that he held for you.

“I know, Lu.” You bit your lip, thinking. “Rhysand would never forgive me.” Your eyes fell from his in shame, focusing on your hands that still rested on Lucien’s chest. He gave another deep sigh, his hands coming up to cover yours.

“Do they not wish you to be happy?” His question was quiet, cautious. You peeked up at him from under your eyelashes, shaking your head.

“They would never accept my happiness lies with you. I’d be sent away, marked a traitor to the Night Court.” Lucien tucked one hand back under your chin, pulling your face up towards his.

“Then they don’t deserve you here. We could go somewhere else, live with each other. I’d go to the ends of this world to see you happy and at peace.” Your heart squeezed at his words as you pushed up to kiss him again. Lucien, the king of your heart.

Maybe it was time to talk with Rhysand and your friends.

***

You and Lucien stayed in that alcove for as long as you could dare, kissing and touching and whispering sweet nothings. Every goodbye got harder, an inevitable end to your little peaceful bubble. You brushed away the fallen tears as you watched Lucien head out, preparing to winnow back to the Spring Court.

You hated these moments.

You composed yourself before going back to Velaris, putting your cool and calm persona back on. A fact that bothered you, that you now felt to hide your true self from your friends. From your family.

You had been in the Night Court for a hundred years, the feared assassin that Rhysand set on his enemies. You had created a name for yourself, deadly and dangerous. You never cared about the fear you instilled in others, not until you met Lucien.

The first time he had come to your court, you instantly felt drawn to him. It had knocked the air out of your lungs, the deep connection you felt to this unknown male. By the flash of shock in his eyes you realized he had felt it too. After that meeting you had cornered him in the hall, demanding to know what magic he had used on you.

It was only minutes after that he had you pressed up against the wall, his lips doing sinful things to yours.

You knew, in your heart, that he was your mate. He knew it too. The bond you couldn’t accept, not yet. Not when you lived in two rival courts, only seeing each other when meetings were called by either High Lord.

You took a deep breath before pushing the doors open to the townhouse, a smug smile on your face. Rhysand turned towards you, raising his glass of whiskey in greeting. “Get that Spring Court scum out of my town?” He teased, a flare of anger igniting in your chest. You pushed it down, laughing instead.

“Don’t I always?” You cooed, heading towards the ever-stocked liquor cart. You grabbed whatever was hardest, only caring about easing the pain in your heart. How long could you keep this up? You loved your family, you loved the Night Court, but you knew you would never be complete without Lucien at your side. You kept your breathing calm as you poured your drink, acting as if nothing were wrong.

“I wish they’d send someone else. How did he even manage to become the Spring Court emissary? He was not born there.” Cassian was musing, his dislike for Lucien strong. He didn’t like any of the Vanserra brothers, regardless of the fact that Lucien himself didn’t care for them either. “I wonder what kind of pity story he told Tamlin to rise up in that Court. I’d wager that he is only there at the order of Beron, probably with some plan to take the High Lord title for himself.” He shook his head and took a deep drink from his glass. “We shouldn’t let him keep coming here, Rhys. Who knows what he’s really doing?”

Your hand tightened around your own glass, raising it to your lips to try to hide the rage coursing through you. It was always like this after the meetings. They would talk about how horrible Lucien is, theorize about his life. You often kept quiet, throwing in the odd comment to not seem suspicious. It felt like a stab in your gut to hear your family speak so terribly about the male you loved.

“Now, Cass, he has never given us a reason not to trust him. Any of the deals we have made he has held true to.” Rhys swirled the liquid in his glass as he spoke, a smirk on his face. “I would rather never have to see that garish face again, though. He carries himself as if he is so much better than everyone, and for what? Being the disgraced son of the Autumn Court, forced to run to his little friend for safety? Pathetic, if you ask me.” You shot back more of your drink, vision turning red. As if you are any different, you thought, immediately checking that your mental shields remained up.

“I think you give him too much credit, Cass. I’ve sent my shadows after Lucien several times and they never have anything interesting to report. He’s just a sad, lonely male.” Azriel shrugged, as if it should be obvious that Lucien had nothing going for him.

You poured more alcohol into your rapidly emptying glass. It got harder and harder to listen to them as your love for Lucien grew. “What do you think, our deadly assassin? You always follow him out, has he ever tried to speak with you? Glean any extra information about our home?” Rhys asked, cocking his head as he did.

You swallowed the drink you had just taken, forcing a cold smile onto your face. “I think Azriel is right. He never says anything, never strays from leaving. He comes to do what was instructed and then he goes. Everything he does is at the hands of another.” You felt sick to speak about him so, but you were too scared of the repercussions the truth would bring. Perhaps that made you a coward, someone undeserving of Lucien. Soon. I’ll tell them soon, you told yourself, shooting back another drink.

***

This had to be a nightmare.

You stared blankly at Rhys, unable to keep your usual calm demeanor. The look of concern on his face told you that you were blowing your cover, that he was going to know something was amiss now.

You couldn’t get yourself to breathe.

“I can select someone else, if this is an issue? My apologies, I didn’t think this would be the most difficult task i’d ask of you.” You wanted to laugh at his joke, to shake your head and smile and go along with his plan. He was right, out of all the things you had done as the Night Court Assassin, this was far from the worst. You simply had to pretend to be betrothed to Azriel.

At the next meeting.

With the Spring Court.

In front of Lucien.

As if the pain of being separate from him wasn’t enough, you would parade around in front of his eyes with a male who wasn’t him. The thought sent a stab into your already injured heart, a reminder of how pathetic you were for not just telling Rhys.

You blinked, clearing your throat. “No, uh, I can do that. Sorry, it just took me by surprise.” You knew it was a weak response, and by the narrowing of Rhys’ eyes he knew it too.

“I don’t trust that Lucien has been coming completely innocently. I have seen the way he looks at you during our meetings when he thinks no one will notice. I am worried he has been sent to try to trick you into a courtship, some sort of sick pairing between the Night and Spring courts.” His scoff of disgust sent another pang through your heart. “By alluding to your engagement to Azriel, we can observe their reaction. See if they slip up with any emotion, anything that proves my theory.” A smirk appeared on his lips. “Besides, what better pairing than my feared Assassin and Spymaster?”

You forced yourself to laugh, nodding along to his plan. “A deadly pair.”

***

You slid your hands down the front of the elegant dress you wore, looking over yourself in the mirror. You looked beautiful, a deadly angel donned all in a blue so deep it was nearly black. Your hair had been twisted up, exposing the expensive earrings and necklace you wore. The gems on them direct matches to Azriel’s siphons, a silent claim that you were his.

As if the giant diamond on your finger didn’t make that clear enough.

You knew it wasn’t real, that it was all a facade. You truly did love Azriel, just not like this. Somehow even pretending to be with another male made you nauseous, uncomfortable in your own skin. You couldn’t help but worry about how Lucien was going to feel when he saw you. Would he understand none of it was real? Or would he fall for the trap Rhys had laid?

“You look lovely.” You turned to the low voice coming from your doorway, a small smile plastered onto your face. Azriel knew something about this plan upset you, cornering you about it earlier that week. You had insisted it was nothing to do with him, that there was no real issue. You faked “confidence issues”, worry that you wouldn’t be able to pull it off. You felt like he hadn’t believed you, but he did not argue further.

“As do you,” you complimented back, the words truthful. Your friend looked as handsome as ever, dressed in his finest to escort you to the meeting.

As his betrothed.

You walked over to him, placing your arm delicately in the crook of his elbow. “Let’s go raise some Hel.”

***

He believed it.

Lucien’s eyes were full of pain and betrayal as he took you in at the side of the Shadowsinger. He stared far too long at the ring on your finger, far too obvious to everyone else. Rhysand smirked from beside you, confident that his plan had succeeded.

You wanted to scream.

Azriel’s arm wrapped around your waist, holding you protectively. Typically you would feel safe in his hold, but every touch from him felt like razors across your skin. Especially with the way Lucien looked at you.

There was anger there. He truly believed you had tossed him aside for Azriel. You felt sick again, swaying slightly in his grasp. Azriel’s arm tightened around you, concern on his face as he looked down. “You okay?” He murmured, not wanting to draw any extra attention to you. You nodded, looking away from him. You didn’t trust your voice.

“Allow me to extend my congratulations to you and yours, Rhysand.” Tamlin spoke smoothly, a genuine smile on his face. You realized that he didn’t know about you and Lucien. You couldn’t help but to glance over at him, your heart aching at the empty expression on his face. You wanted to scream. This plan was ridiculous.

“Thank you, Tamlin.” Azriel spoke politely, his body against yours all of a sudden too hot. Every instinct told you to run to Lucien, that it shouldn’t be Azriel you are stood next to.

“I must say, Tamlin, that you may be more clever than I gave you credit for,” Rhysand began, inspecting his nails as if this was a mindless discussion. No. No. No.

Stop this.

You need to STOP THIS.

Your mind was screaming at you, but your body was frozen in place. Horror coursed through your veins, disgust in yourself twinning with it. Why hadn’t you spoken up sooner? You looked to Tamlin, his brows furrowed as he listened to Rhysand.

“An alliance between our courts would be something extremely beneficial to you, wouldn’t it? So beneficial, in fact, that you would resort to such lowly measures to try to secure it.” Rhysand glanced up at Tamlin then, lips pursing as he took in the genuine confusion on his face. Rhysands eyes narrowed, looking between Lucien and Tamlin. “Or did you not know? What your emissary has been doing here?” Tamlin now turned to Lucien, eyes wide.

“What are you talking about?” Lucien spat out, his typical cool demeanor gone. Rhysand smiled gleefully, gesturing over to you.

Say something. You need to say something.

“Your little game you’ve been playing with my assassin. Trying to win her heart, her hand in marriage.” He laughed. “It’s too bad our Shadowsinger here got her first, isn’t it?”

Coward. Coward. COWARD.

SPEAK UP.

Lucien turned slowly to you, eyes rimmed in red. “Is this true?” His voice was quiet, broken. Your hands shook as you took him in, the heartbreak so strong you could almost taste it.

“I-I,” you stuttered out, looking to Rhysand in a panic. How could he do this to you?

How could you LET him do this to you?

You shot away from Azriel, sucking in deep breaths of air. You turned wildly to Lucien, tears streaming down your face. “No.”

Rhysand gave a cruel laugh, drawing your attention back to him. “Whatever do you mean?” He asked, venmo dripping from his words. You wanted to cower at his anger, to back away and continue on with the plan.

But you had remained quiet long enough.

You shook your head, voice growing stronger. “No.” You looked back to Lucien, every inch of you hoping you could fix this. “I do love Lucien, Rhys. But it is not how you think.” You took a step closer to him, a pathetic relief soaking through you when he didn’t back away. “I have loved him from the moment we met. I have loved him secret, hiding this part of myself from you all.” You took another step. “I wait, heart aching with the pain of being apart from him, for these stupid meetings. I stay awake at night and watch the stars, imagining him doing the same.” More tears fell, matching ones trailing down Lucien’s face as you took another step towards him. “I live for hidden moments in dark corridors, for whispers of love only when no one else can hear them. And i’m tired.” Your voice cracked as you took the final step, bringing you right in front of Lucien.

“I’m so tired,” you whispered, slowly holding your hand out to him. You needed his strength, his warmth. He glanced between your hand and face, expression unreadable.

And then he took a step back.

The air disappeared from your lungs, your knees shaking as they struggled to support you.

No. No. No.

You had to fix this. You looked towards Rhys, Azriel, and Cassian. They wore similar expressions of shock and…pity. Pity.

You fell to your knees. “He’s my mate,” you choked out, the already silent room going even quieter. As if time itself stood still at your proclamation.

“Lucien is my mate,” you said again, anger with yourself charging through you. “He is my mate and I never told anyone. I allowed us to suffer in silence, too scared to tell you the truth. I thought you’d dismiss me from Court, from your life if you found out, Rhys.” More tears fell as you watched the flicker of pain go across your High Lords face.

“No, I would never-“ He started, moving towards you.

“Wouldn’t you?” Rhys stopped as you cut him off, gazing down upon your tear stained face. “Look what we are doing right now, Rhysand. The mere thought of Lucien being interested sent you to create a whole plan to catch him.” You looked down in shame. “And I let you do it.”

You felt like you may die right there. You had waited too long to say anything, you had allowed Lucien to be humiliated in front of his High Lord and yours. You had hidden your heart too deep, too afraid of what would happen if your friends found out about Lucien. All for you to lose him in the end.

A hand appeared in front of your blurred vision.

A familiar, welcoming hand.

You looked up to see Lucien’s face, a small smile on his as he helped you up. You stood in front of him, unsure what to say.

“You want this?” He asked quietly, tucking his hand under your chin. You swallowed, nodding.

“I only want you. Now, and forever.” It was true. You realized now how silly you had been, how you never should have feared losing your friends and court. All that mattered was Lucien. The male created just for you.

“My mate,” he whispered, before pulling you in and pressing his lips to yours. The kiss was full of fire and love, the now acknowledged mating bond singing. You melted into him, holding him as tight as you could. The rest of the room disappeared, leaving only you and Lucien. You felt as if you were glowing, wrapped up in the love he exuded.

You pulled away only when your lungs cried for air, smiling up at Lucien. He was yours. It didn’t matter what anyone else thought.

You turned to Rhys, grasping Lucien’s hand tight within yours. “If you wish me to go, then I will. But I will not sit and suffer and lie in fear any longer. I love you, all of you.” You looked at Lucien next to you. “My heart and soul belong with Lucien. I hope that you can accept that.”

Rhys rushed over to you, grabbing your hands into his. “How could you ever think that? I made this plan thinking he was trying to use you. If I had known, I would never-“ his voice cracked as he looked at Lucien. “I hope you can accept my sincerest apologies. I would never do anything to compromise her happiness.” You felt new tears slide down your cheeks, both relieved and embarrassed. You should have trusted Rhys, not hidden away in fear. You squeezed his hands, bringing his attention back to you.

“I should’ve told you a long time ago. I’m sorry.” He shook his head, pulling you in for a hug.

“No, i’m sorry. I never should have created an environment where you didn’t feel safe telling me this.” His eyes were shiny as he moved away, releasing you back to Lucien. “Whatever you want, I will grant. If you wish to live here I will accept you with open arms.” Tamlin stepped up next to him, nodding in agreement.

“My Court will always be open to you as well. I can’t imagine anyone who deserves this joy more than Lucien.” He gave him a broad smile, happy for his closest friend. Lucien nodded once in thanks, an arm wrapping securely around your waist. His fingers traced the diamond ring on your hand, slipping it off easily.

“I think we should replace this, don’t you?”

***

Some Time Later

You were admiring the elegant gold ring on your finger, watching the way the suns rays bounced off the firey ruby in the center of it. No matter how much time had passed you couldn’t help but be stunned by the beauty of the thing. The balcony door opened behind you, arms wrapping around your waist. A pair of lips met your neck, kissing you as you hummed softly.

“Early morning?” Lucien asked, teeth grazing your skin. You leaned harder back into him, welcoming his touch.

“Mmm. Rhys wanted to go over my upcoming assignments. He’s…worried about me completing them.” One of Lucien’s hands slid down over the slight curve of your stomach, the beginning signs of the life growing inside you.

“He’s not underestimating my wife, is he?” Lucien asked with a playful bite to your neck.

You laughed, shaking your head. “I told him it was fine, and if I felt I could not complete a task I would tell him so. He still didn’t seem convinced, if i’m being honest.”

“Hm. Perhaps i’ll have to talk to him.” Lucien turned you in his arms, pressing a searing kiss to your lips. “Let him know how perfectly capable you are.” You smiled up at him, kissing him again. Lucien tugged you close, opening your mouth with his. Ever since he found out you were carrying his baby, he hadn’t been able to keep his hands off of you.

Not that you were complaining.

***

#acotar x reader #lucien x reader #lucien vanserra x reader #acotar x you #acotar x y/n #lucien x y/n #lucien x you #lucien #lucien vanserra #forbidden love #azrielsdoves 1k celebration

166 notes · View notes

parkerslatte · 22 days

Text

Finding Home || Part Five

Azriel x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: none

Summary: Y/N and Azriel warm up in her apartment and plan which task they are going to conquer next.

Finding Home Masterlist

A Court of Thorns and Roses Masterlist

•••

The moment Azriel and Y/N entered her apartment, he immediately walked to the couch and grabbed a thick blanket and threw it over her shoulders. Y/N was still shivering a lot. He was not sure what overcame him when he launched them both into the air. Typically when it rained hard he would rarely fly, typically using his shadows to go to the destination he desired. But as soon as he looked at Y/N, he wanted to fly with her, he wanted to feel her arms tighten around her when they were up in the air.

Azriel didn’t fly high at all, just a couple of feet above the rooftops, but the delight in Y/N’s laugh would stay with him for centuries. Ever since his family had moved on, he had not had the chance to fly anyone anywhere nowadays, and he missed it. He missed the trust always put in him. Rhys and Feyre would fly together, with Nyx between them. Cassian would always take Nesta and Elain and Lucien were typically in the Day Court most of the time so Azriel never saw them too often.

But with Y/N, she was someone he had never taken flying before and he wished he could again and again and again. The amount of trust she put in him made his heart melt.

As Azriel turned back to Y/N she had a wide smile on his face. “That was incredible!”

A soft smile graced Azriel’s features. Though as he continued to look at her shivering form, he frowned. “I should have just winnowed us back here. It was dangerous for us to fly in the rain.”

“I don’t care about that,” Y/N replied. “You didn’t even fly high. If we would have fallen, at most we would have gotten a few broken bones.”

“Y/N, I put you in danger,” Azriel said, taking a few steps away, insecurity rising within him.

“I put my trust into you, Azriel,” Y/N said, closing the distance between them. “If we were to fall, I knew you would never allow me to hit the ground before you, you selfless bat.”

Azriel avoided her gaze as he looked at the wooden floor between them. A small puddle of water forming from the droplets of water dripping from their clothes. A warm hand was placed on Azriel’s chin and his head was forced up so his gaze met Y/N’s.

“Azriel,” Y/N began, “you did not put me in danger at all. Not for one second did I think that I was in danger.”

“It was still stupid,” Azriel said.

“Not at all,” Y/N said as her hand caressed his cheek.

Azriel froze but didn’t move away. The touch was a welcome one and the sort of touch he hadn’t experienced in a long time. It was gentle and Azriel felt himself leaning into it.

“Where did you get this?” Y/N asked, her thumb stroking over a thin scar on Azriel’s cheek.

Azriel knew exactly what scar she was talking about. Out of the few on his face, it was by far the most prominent. Though thin, it stood out in the light. It was the only scar Azriel remembered getting and exactly how he got it.

“It was during a snowball fight,” Azriel answered.

Y/N pressed her lips into a thin line. “That’s…interesting.”

Azriel smiled. “You’re trying not to laugh.”

Y/N raised her hands in surrender. “I’m not.”

“You definitely are,” Azriel said.

“Perhaps I am,” Y/N said, lightly covering her mouth as she smiled. “Tell me, Azriel, how did you get this scar during a snowball fight?”

Azriel laughed lightly. “It is stupid to think about now.”

“Tell me,” Y/N said, nudging him.

“Well every year myself, Rhys and Cassian go to Rhys’s cabin in the mountains and have a snowball fight. I was angry at Rhys so I decided to cover snow around rocks and throw them,” Azriel explained.

Y/N gasped. “You didn’t!”

“Once Rhys realised what I was doing, he did the same.” Azriel pointed to the scar. “That’s how this happened. It was stupid of me thinking back on it, I knew that I was in the wrong during the argument but I let my emotions get the better of me.”

“I have a scar too,” Y/N said. “And it was also stupid reason as to why I got it. Unfortunately I cannot show you as it is in an…interesting place.”

“What’s the story behind it?” Azriel asked.

Y/N smirked. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

Azriel stepped forward, a cocky grin on his face. “I would actually.”

Y/N suddenly flushed and Azriel couldn’t help but feel a sense of triumph because of it. “I guess I’m not the only one so easily flustered?”

“Shut up,” Y/N replied. “I’m cold, so I am going to change. Don’t destroy my apartment while I’m gone.”

“Who do you take me for?” Azriel questioned.

Y/N slowly backed away. “Well you did just admit to throwing rocks in a snowball fight.”

“That was one time,” Azriel replied.

Y/N shrugged before turning around. “Don’t mess up my living room, Azriel.”

Azriel held his hands up in defence. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Feel free to change as well,” Y/N said, gesturing to his bag of clothes. “I can’t imagine those clothes are comfortable now they are soaked through.”

Y/N was gone before Azriel had the chance to answer. His body seemed to work automatically as he quickly changed into some dry clothes. His hair was still a dripping mess but he did not have a clue where Y/N kept her towels and he didn’t want to rummage through any of her things. Azriel remained standing in the centre of Y/N’s living room holding his wet clothes.

The list of tasks resided on the small table beside the couch. Azriel brought it up to read it. Three of the tasks were crossed out and suddenly the whole list felt small. As Azriel continued to read down the list, small annotations were written upon it. Upon further inspection they were notes for some of the tasks; about where to do some of them and some tasks that could be grouped together. Azriel’s shadows rested upon his shoulders, feeling just as calm and at ease as he was.

“Az,” Y/N called out. “You can change in the bathroom if you wish, I didn’t mention that to you–”

“You called me ‘Az’?” Azriel said.

“I did,” Y/N said. “If you are uncomfortable with that, I apologise–”

“I like it when you call me that,” Azriel said.

Y/N smiled. “I was saying that you can change in the bathroom but I see you’ve already done it.”

Azriel nodded and held up his wet clothing. “Where should I put these?”

“Oh, pass them here,” Y/N said, reaching out and taking them from him. “I normally dry my clothes out on a rack on the balcony coming off my bedroom but I have just left my clothes on the rack in my bedroom. I can hang your clothes up too.”

Azriel nodded and read through the list once more. He sat down on the couch, resting his wings over the back of it and leaned back comfortably, sinking back into the cushions. When Y/N re-entered the room, Azriel held the list up. “What’s this?”

“Oh, this morning when you were asleep, I spent time reading through the list and looking at what could be paired together and what we could do for some of the tasks. Some of them could be rather vague,” Y/N said and sat next to Azriel on the couch.

She picked up a blanket and draped it over her legs and over Azriel’s. Azriel’s heart began to beat faster. The domesticity of it all made him hot.

“You didn’t need to do this, Y/N,” Azriel said. “This is quite a lot of work.”

“It was nothing,” Y/N said. “Truly. All of these are just ideas I have come up with off the top of my head.”

Azriel glanced at her and found her studying the list with a frown. The only thing he wanted to do was wipe the frown away.

“Though there are still some tasks on here that I cannot do with you,” Y/N said and pointed to task number nineteen. “I unfortunately don’t have wings so I think if I jumped from a cliff, I wouldn’t live to tell the tale. I will happily wait from the ground and watch.”

Azriel rolled his eyes. “I can carry you.”

Y/N’s eyes widened. “Absolutely not. I am not allowing you to jump from the highest cliff in the Night Court with me in your arms. There is no way on the planet that that is happening.”

“I thought you trusted me?” Azriel teased.

“I do trust you,” Y/N said.

Just that phrase alone was enough to make Azriel smile. Y/N’s trust in him only after a few days made him feel a way Azriel couldn’t describe.

“But I do not wish to free fall until you decide to start flying and give me whiplash,” Y/N said. “Besides, I am sure you will get through one task alone. Well, two considering I don’t think the High Lord would allow a stranger around his son.”

Task twenty-three; take Nyx to the park. Azriel’s heart squeezed. When Nyx was younger he always took him anywhere he asked, the child just had that effect on Azriel. When he was born, everyone thought Cassian would be the ‘fun’ uncle, but in reality it was Azriel. Azriel would always play with Nyx when he wanted and take him to the park all the time. However, when Azriel began to feel a distance to his family, those outings with Nyx become less and less.

“Yes,” Azriel agreed. “Perhaps I should do that one alone.”

“I know you mentioned that you didn’t want to do so many of the tasks in one go, but I thought we could go shopping in Velaris tomorrow?” Y/N suggested. “Hopefully it is a nicer day and I need to buy more food.”

“So now you are using my tasks as an excuse to do your chores?” Azriel teased.

Y/N laughed and tilted her head to look at him. “Yeah, I guess I am. So yes or no?”

Azriel smiled. “Yes.”

“Great,” Y/N said. “Because now that you are also staying here, I need to buy more food than I usually do.”

“You don’t need to buy food for me,” Azriel said.

“No, you are a guest,” Y/N said. “And I never get to treat anyone to anything anymore, so let me buy the food for meals. Maybe I will allow you to buy some more wine or something.”

Y/N leaned forward to take something off the coffee table and Azriel immediately missed her warmth. The blanket slipped down onto the floor as she moved so Azriel picked it up. Y/N returned to her place next to Azriel and settled back into the cushions with a book in hand. Azriel settled the blanket back over their laps and Y/N smiled gratefully.

“What are you reading?” Azriel answered.

Y/N showed him the cover. “I am not entirely sure. My friend recommended it to me a while ago. I haven’t gotten a chance to read it.”

“Can I read it with you?” Azriel asked, his voice going strangely quiet. He could already feel heat rising to his cheeks.

“Of course!” Y/N said. “I haven’t started it so we can experience the whole thing together.”

Despite Azriel being the one to ask to read the book with her, he almost immediately regretted it. Not because he didn’t want to, but because of how close Y/N sat next to him and how she leaned in closer so he had a view of the book too. The casual and domestic touch was almost overwhelming for Azriel, considering he had not had this kind of touch in a while.

“Can you see?” Y/N asked.

“Yeah, yeah, I can see,” Azriel answered.

Y/N gave him a final smile before turning her attention to the book. Azriel did the same. He tried to concentrate on the words but all he could focus on was the way in which Y/N was rested against him. He had the urge to wrap his arm around her, inevitably making them both more comfortable overall, but if she rejected that touch, Azriel would feel mortified. Instead, Azriel rested his hands in his lap and read the same lines as Y/N, occasionally sneaking a glance down at her.

Deep within Azriel, something began to glow faintly.

Taglist:

@justdreamstars @naturakaashi @thesunloveschips @hijabi-desi-bookworm @mischiefmanagers @waytoomanyteenagefeels @amara-moonlight @ithan-holstroms-girl @meshellexplosionmurder @nightcourt-daydreaming @brujitafantomarico @qinfeii @pinksmellslikelove @schultzlindsey5 @mell-bell @we-were-beautiful @fightmedraco @glitterypirateduck @lostinpages13 @actuallyacerrr @poetryinshadows @saltedcoffeescotch @topaz125 @acourtofbatboydreams @luvmoo @daily-dose-of-sass @applerubyy @tonysttank @just-a-social-casualty-1 @scatteredstardustt @samaxraph99 @i-m-in-loki-s-army @katlyndawn51 @skyesayshi @iamjimintrash @reverieinthestars @witchymomfrien @oliviajdjarin @tele86 @sfhsgrad-blog @judig92 @natashachelsea @prettylittlewrites @amysangel @mybestfriendmademe @aria-chikage @phoenix666stuff @wilmalovegood @acphengene @tothestarsandwhateverend @sheblogs @littlelunatica @rose-girls-world @darkbloodsly @impossibelle @mysticalfuncollectorus @od-anon @books-and-lit @acphengene @emmmass24 @usernamesareies @hauntedstudentobservationus

- strike through could not be tagged -

#acotar #acotar x reader #a court of thorns and roses #azriel x reader #azriel acotar #azriel #azriel shadowsinger #azriel fluff #azriel fic

180 notes · View notes

chichikoi · 2 months

Text

hiraeth.

part II. synopsis: she watches as cassian falls for another, grappling with her own hidden affections and their newly snapped mating bond in the process. pairing: cassian x fem!reader fandom: a court of thorns and roses (book series by sarah j maas) genre: angst warnings: none a/n: house of balloons/glass table girls, this is his song... i love him. fluff part two coming up OBVIOUSLY, im not fucking ending it like this i cant do this to my #1 loverboy babygirl kitty princess beloved. @joyseuphoria hi <3

Cassian had always been the beacon of power and resolve, with a demeanor rugged and unyielding. But beneath the surface was vulnerability, and she knew that it was written in the stars for her to remain by his side as his closest friend and confidante, never to become one to uncover that side of him.

But it didn’t make it easier. Watching him as he fell for Nesta’s every glance, every touch, every word that escaped her mouth seemed to throw him deeper and deeper into a trance. And she was fine with that, and accepted it. Accepted that she would never be the object of his softened glances, his featherlight touches, his-

Her thoughts halted as Cassian stormed into the room, frustration radiating off him in waves. She glanced up from her book, her eyes immediately catching the tension etched onto his features. Without a word, she closed her book and shifted, making room for him on the couch.

Cassian collapsed beside her, his movements rough yet familiar. He stretched out, his feet finding their place on her lap almost instinctively. Y/N didn't flinch; instead, she settled into the comfortable silence, waiting for Cassian to speak.

"It's Nesta," he finally muttered, his voice heavy with frustration. "Training with her…it was like walking on eggshells. One wrong move, and she was tearing into me with those ice-cold eyes."

She listened attentively, her gaze soft as she absorbed his words. "It was like she was always testing me," Cassian continued, his voice growing softer with each word. "Pushing me to my limits, making me question everything I thought I knew about myself."

Her fingers instinctively started to massage his feet as he spoke. It was a small gesture, one born out of years of friendship and trust. Cassian didn't protest; instead, he leaned back against the cushions, allowing the soothing touch to ease the tension from his muscles.

As the minutes stretched on, their conversation ebbed and flowed, the weight of Cassian's burdens slowly lifting with each passing moment. Y/N listened, offering words of comfort when needed, but mostly content to provide silent support.

Cassian's breathing eventually evened out, his body relaxing against the cushions. Y/N glanced down to find him fast asleep, his features softened by the serenity of slumber. She smiled softly, her heart swelling with affection.

Suddenly, chains, bolts, and locks shifted, loosening, their weight growing just a little more tolerable. A soul peeked through. Broken, scarred, and trembling — with fear, she realized, but it stretched further and further. Yearning, searching.

It was as though a tether had snapped into place, an invisible thread binding her to Cassian in a way she had never felt before. Confusion flickered as she processed the intensity of the connection, the undeniable pull drawing her closer to him.

She was aware that this was not happening in the slightest. A mind trick. A dream, she thought. betraying once, the jolt of real-time that pushed through her. Burning her cheeks and stealing her breath. How the waking world slipped past the knobby parts of her fingers like a whisper, barely there, because dreaming was just a fancier word for getting lost. It held her there, suspended in imagination and for every second, it felt real. Like she could grasp the outlines and the textures. Like she could touch the weather, drink the clouds, and taste the sunlight.

The gods who had her in a chokehold withdrew.

Death feared her too, it seemed.

He was soaring in the air, and she was on the ground. She tried to reach him but he was far, far out of her reach. Seconds ticked by, and then minutes, and every thought that tried to sneak its way in, through this thick veil, bounced off and dissipated into thin air.

Because she then remembered… that beautiful things shouldn’t be broken. And she had a knack for breaking things.

The soft rays of dawn streamed through the windows of the House of Wind, casting a warm glow over the sitting room where she and Cassian had fallen asleep. As she stirred from her slumber, she found herself alone on the couch, the imprint of Cassian's presence still lingering in the air. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes, her mind foggy with the remnants of… dreams? Visions? She felt as though the very fabric of her existence had been torn asunder, leaving her adrift in a sea of uncertainty, but when has that ever stopped her?

So she stood on the ground and longed.

part II here >>

283 notes · View notes

danikamariewrites · 10 months

Note

what do you think about batboys headcanon with s/o that has daddy issues, like she does small things to try to make him proud and at first he thinks she’s just being cute but he realizes the depth and her need for praise and what’s going on and just reassures her. i’m just literally projecting😀

The bat boys would be so sweet about this omg…

A/n: the way this made me even more aware I need someone to be proud of me 🤪 ur not alone anon trust me

Warnings: I honestly don’t know what to put here Im so sorry

Rhysand

To get his praise you’d help him a lot with his paper work or other high lord duties

You do things around the house like redecorating just for his attention

“Good job baby! I love it.” And he’d kiss your head

One day you help him with a stack of paper work that he just didn’t want to do

When you gave it to him he just said ‘thank you’

Which was fine but you were hurt, stung even. You felt a pang in your chest

He always praised you and you just wanted to make him proud of you bc he was always proud of you

You froze up staring at him with wide eyes and the most heartbreaking frown

Rhys noticed you were still there and looked up at you, “darling what’s wrong?”

“Did I do something wrong?” And that’s when it clicks for him. Your past and how you light up at his praise

“No not at all my love. I’m just tired. Come here,” he pulled you to sit on his lap and would whisper sweet nothings to you reassuring you that he wasn’t mad at you

Cassian

I think he praises his s/o in general

Cass thinks you’re the most precious thing in the whole world

So he gives you a lot of love and attention

He always holds your hand or has his arms wrapped around you

One night while you’re at Rita’s with the IC and Cass would typically keep you close but he wasn’t tonight

Cassian wasn’t even doing it intentionally he was just all over the place enjoying himself

It made you feel like he didn’t want you or need you around him

You sat and moped in the booth watching him have a good time

Cassian was looking for you but you didn’t see that

He finally noticed you and slid in the booth next to you

You look away from him and he puts an arm around you and pulling your chin softly so you look at him

“Baby what’s wrong?” You pout up at him “you weren’t hanging out with me tonight and you didn’t pay attention to me when I tried. It felt like you didn’t want to touch me.”

Cassian’s heart breaks the moment you say those last words

He runs through all the times he’s held you and how you hold on tighter and he realizes you need that

Cassian holds you and dances with you the rest of the night

Azriel

Azriel knew immediately after you started dating why you were so attached to him

He never brought it up bc he never wanted to make you talk about anything you didn’t want to

You’d talk to him when you were ready

Az always made sure to show you love by using physical touch, spending time with you, and praises you like crazy

He was always so proud of you when you got through the days where he was away on missions

Az would always bring you back a souvenir from the continent or other courts he visited

One day he came home without one and just gave you a hug and kiss

No praise. No gift.

You knew some jobs took a toll on him but he would always tell you, communication is a huge thing with you

A few days passed and you didn’t say anything about it. You knew you shouldn’t always expect gifts from him, he didn’t need to but you had gotten so used to it

You were quite and reserved all week. Trying not to be to needy for attention in case Azriel didn’t want to give you any. It scared you though. You thought you did something or something happen on his mission to make him not want you

One night after dinner you sat next to him on the couch both of you reading. Az noticed you sitting very still and not snuggling with him like you usually would

“Love, why are you sitting so far from me?” “No reason.” You try to give him a convincing smile but he sees right through it

“Tell me the truth. Please love.” “When you came home a week ago you just brushed me off. And I had a really hard time while you were gone. And I’ve been anxious all week because you didn’t bring me a gift or anything. I’m sorry it’s stupid.” You quickly stand and head for the stairs but Az stops you

“My love, I’m so sorry. Come here.” He hugs you and explains it was a bad mission and he had no time for anything else. He also apologized for not giving you the usual welcome home treatment

Az made sure to never do it again and always told you if he needed a day or so to recover

#acotar #acotar fanfiction #acotar reader imagine #acotar reader fic #acotar imagine #cassian acotar #azriel x reader #azriel shadowsinger #azriel acotar #azriel x you #rhysand x reader #rhysand fluff #rhysand acotar #rhysand headcanon #cassian headcanons #azriel headcanons

614 notes · View notes

steveslevis · 22 days

Text

i love you, it’s ruining my life

azriel x cassian's sister!reader - part 2 of 3

summary: Rhysand sends you on the mission to Windhaven alone, and things do not go as planned.

warnings: mentions of violence/blood, poison, mentions of previous assault and past trauma, Azriel being oblivious and upset again

word count: 5.5k

Windhaven, the place you once called home.

Now the place you avoided at all costs, the place where you lived through your worst nightmares and recollected them every single night while trying to sleep in the hell hole of a cabin you were going to be staying in for the night.

You tried your hardest to forget about the night that would haunt you for the rest of eternity, tried to will it from your memory, tried to put up an obsidian wall around it to lock it in.

But there was no forgetting what happened to you, not now, not ever. There was no trusting a male fully ever again, all thanks to the Illyrian customs.

Cillian was the first and last male you ever trusted. He gained your trust, made you fall in love with him, then ripped you to shreds, mentally and physically. The only male you ever trusted was the same one who lured you into that wretched cabin alone and held you down with a knife.

I love you, he had whispered in your ear all those years ago while pinning you to the floor, your wings spread as the knife pressed against one of the central tendons, I just have to do this so everyone knows you’re mine. So you can be a normal Illyrian female.

He was mere centimeters from clipping your wings when Rhysand heard your silent cries, busting into the cabin, making the wicked male scramble away in fear of what might happen to him.

You knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep at all during your stay in the camp, but it was probably better that way. That way you could stay on guard all night, that way you could watch your own back. You had to prove to Rhysand and the rest of the Inner Circle that you could be treated like a grown female, that you were willing to do anything for the Night court.

There wasn’t much time when you arrived at the cabin, you had to set your bag inside and leave almost immediately, heading towards Lord Devlon’s hall for dinner.

As much as Devlon hated your brother, he had nothing but respect for you. That might be partially due to the threats you’d set into his mind a few hundred years ago, or the fact that you’d beat him during training multiple times, but the reason didn’t matter. It was more beneficial for you to be the one to show your face in Windhaven this time around and you knew that, regardless of how much it made your stomach turn. It was important that someone from the Inner Circle came to Windhaven every once in a while under the guise of making sure the camp was still in order, so this was the perfect opportunity to gain important insight as well.

So you sat at the long table for dinner, chatting with those around you in the most civil tone that you could. You couldn’t bear to eat in all honesty, just the thought of having to stay in the cursed cabin for even eight hours for sleep was enough to make you lose all appetite. So, you opted for pushing around some potatoes and meat on your plate all while chugging down four glasses of faerie wine throughout the two hours you were there.

You coincidentally sat to the right of Cormac during the meal, who had Balvard sitting on the left of him, making it almost too easy for you to infiltrate their minds and figure out their foolish plan. The two of them were under the impression that they would be able to take out Devlon with a faebane dagger and control the camps with ease. It made you scoff to yourself when you discovered that neither of them had a backup plan, as if that was going to work out so smoothly for them.

The remainder of dinner after finding out the information you needed consisted of you bantering with some of the Illyrians you had grown up next to, ones who had turned into great warriors through training at Windhaven. The sun had been set for hours by the time you made your way back to the cabin, setting up some wards as you stepped over the threshold.

Exhaustion hit you almost immediately upon changing into your sleep clothes, eyelids heavy as you relaxed onto your side in the large bed next to the fire you’d just lit. You’d assumed you would be wired at this point, you’d planned on not sleeping at all due to the fear instilled deep in your bones.

You cuddled into the blankets, the familiar scent of your old home giving you an eerily comforted feeling passing through your gut. Solace filled you once you threw up a final shield around the small cabin, setting you at ease to know nobody could come in unless you let them in.

Before you knew it, you were fast asleep on the bed.

You awoke a few hours later, disturbed by the noise of the front door swinging open. Your body felt paralyzed in the moment, lethargy taking you over as you slowly turned your head towards the noise. It felt like everything was moving in slow motion as you watched the two males stalk through the door, unable to react in any way as your eyes trailed up to see Cormac and Balvard stepping over the threshold. The smirks on their faces told you everything you needed to know about what was about to happen.

You wracked your brain for how this could’ve happened, how you were immobilized by these two lowly, evil men in front of you, how you fell into their trap so easily, and how the hell you were completely unable to use any power or energy in this moment.

Faebane.

How could you be so foolish? You should’ve known better than to drink the wine so freely at a table of men you barely knew, especially after infiltrating Cormac and Balvard’s minds and discovering they wanted to use the same fucking poison on Devlon.

“Stupid female.” Balvard spat at you as Cormac inched closer to you, hand reaching out for your ankle. “You really thought you could come here, infiltrate our fucking minds to find out our plans, and just get away with it?”

You couldn’t speak, it was like someone was pressing down on your throat as you tried to breathe, there had been some gloriella in your wine, too, you were sure of it. Your body was pulled from the bed and flipped over in one swift tug, you were thrown onto the floor in an instant.

Images of Cillian flashed through your mind as your helpless form was pushed onto the floor, images of his wicked grin that matched the ones both of the males in front of you were wearing currently.

A silent tear slid down your cheek as Balvard spoke, but you couldn’t hear his words. He was still rambling on about how stupid of a female you were, and how you deserved nothing but pain after what you were planning to do to them, but you tried your hardest to drown them out.

There was nothing you could do at this point, as Balvard held your legs down, as Cormac pinned your wings with one large hand while the other pulled a sizable knife from its sheath. There was nothing you could do but close your eyes and hope that it would be over soon.

You had never felt this helpless before, not even when Cillian had pinned you down. At least then you were able to fight back, at least then you had a shred of dignity and pride left, at least then you hadn’t been so foolish as to let someone fucking poison you.

You cursed yourself internally as you squeezed your eyes shut, pain rippling through your body at the first slash of the knife against your wing. The first cut was against the base of your right wing, a long slash that would take months to heal, if it ever did.

A prayer to the Gods repeated itself in your mind as you felt the blood trickle from your wing and onto your back. Your heart ached as the silent tears flowed, wandering to the furthest corners of your mind as you tried to think of anything aside from the pain that was being inflicted upon you. It took everything in you to realize that you had a sliver of power still running through your veins, just enough to call out to your daemati brother, Rhys.

As you shot a quick thought down the bridge of Rhysand’s mind, you were met with a welcoming talon of power. You could feel his concern as you pushed one-worded thoughts to him to get his attention.

Everything alright, sister? He questioned through your mind, urging you to let him see what you’d experienced in the last twelve hours with a kind caress of his power in your mind.

You only had enough power to cry out silently to him, Send help, please. Your mind was closed to him as quickly as it had opened, everything went dark on your end as your energy ran out and you were blinded with even more pain, throwing you quickly into unconsciousness.

The next thing you remembered was waking up to the sound of wailing and begging from behind you, the two men who had you pinned down minutes before were thrown against the wall as their High Lord took pleasure in tearing them to shreds in a slow and painful death. The cries came to a sudden halt moments later, Rhys growing tired of their begging as he decided to shatter their minds and put you out of your misery as quickly as possible.

“R–Rhys–” you sob once their cries stopped, unable to do anything aside from lift a weak finger to point towards the man in the doorframe.

The High Lord’s gaze turns from one of pure rage to one of a worried friend once his violet eyes flick toward where you lay in the middle of the cabin. He takes in the sight in front of him slowly, your pained expression and tear-stained cheeks There’s blood pooled around your midsection, drenching your sleep shirt as you pant in pain on the dusty wooden floor. One of your wings looks fractured in multiple spots, while the other one is mangled from the beginnings of a mutilation.

The sight made Rhysand shudder with anger, fists tight at his sides as he slipped into your mind in order to understand the extent of the situation you found yourself in. You let him in without resistance, unable to hold any kind of mental shield up anymore.

They were going to clip your wings, take away the one thing you had to remind you of your mother, take away the one thing you held so dearly, take away your ability to fly. They were going to make you into the ideal complicit Illyrian female before wiping your memory of the entire night, which he assumed from the extremely prohibited memory tonic rolling on the floor next to you.

Rhys was glad he’d shattered the two traitors inside and out once your memories were collected, realizing how ruthless they had been with you moments before he stormed in.

“D–Don’t tell Cassian.” you plead, eyes focused on Rhys as he took another step into the cabin.

Your pleas took Rhys back to that fateful night all those years ago, the night he found you in this same room, sobbing in the middle of the room after being defiled by another Illyrian male who he nearly ripped to ribbons in the same exact spot where Cormac and Balvard laid in the corner, the male who fled from Windhaven the next morning, likely from threats from Rhysand himself.

Four hundred and fifty years ago was when he vowed to protect you like his own sister. You had begged him that night not to tell Cassian about what he’d seen, the vulnerable state the situation had left you in. The two of you had even made a bargain that night, that he would never be able to reveal the truth about what happened, so long as you remained loyal to him and his family, which he knew you would do regardless.

Four hundred and fifty years ago he promised to be the one to look out for you and make sure you were protected in situations you knew your brother’s unadulterated rage couldn’t handle.

And now, four hundred and fifty years after that fateful day, he’d failed you.

Rhys gave you a sympathetic look, opening his mouth to speak in response to your request, but was interrupted by your brother pushing through the doorway past him. Cassian nearly tripped over his own two feet at the sight of you, stomach churning when he saw your mangled wings slumped on the wood over your limp body.

“Don’t look, Cass.” you beg your brother as he stares at you with wide eyes, knowing the sight will spin him into a fit of rage. In your dazed state, you could see him beginning to seethe at the possibilities of what could’ve happened to you, his breaths quickening at the thought.

Before Cassian can reply, Rhys slips into his mind. She needs her brother right now, not the Lord of Bloodshed ready to avenge her. Let’s get her back to the house before you make any rash decisions, we can come back and rip whoever else deserves it to shreds once she’s safe.

Cassian chokes on a breath as Rhysand tries to reassure him that you’ll be alright. It takes everything in him to compose himself, but he does it for you, his twin, his fiery sister who he’d take an ash arrow to the heart for.

“I can’t—can’t feel—“ you choke out, squirming and groaning in pain as Cassian picks you up from the floor. “My w—wings. I can’t feel them. Did they—they take them away?”

Your pained words strike Cassian like a dagger to the heart, tears welling up as he thinks about how much pain you had to be in.

“No, I promise. They didn’t take them away. They’re–they’re still there, Y/N. It—It’ll be okay,” your brother says in a stern tone as he chokes back his own tears, eyes wide as he watches you struggle in his arms while walking through the cabin’s front door. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”

It sounded almost like he was trying to convince himself that it would all be okay as he shot into the sky with you curled up in his arms.

You were in and out of consciousness the entirety of the flight back to the House of Wind, babbling nonsense as Cassian tried to keep you stable in his arms.

The entire Inner Circle was already at the house when Cassian landed, an air of worry carrying through the group as they saw the state of you, more specifically the state of your wings.

Rhysand immediately called for Madja upon seeing the extent of your injuries, and ordered Cassian to take you to your room and to keep you awake until she arrived.

Cassian was up the stairs in a flash, Feyre and Mor on his heels as he rushed to your room, with Azriel quietly following behind them. He laid you on your side, your bloodied wings spread across the bed as you curled up near the edge of the large bed. Your eyes landed on Feyre as he stepped away, a dazed smile spreading across your lips as you reached out a hand for her.

The High Lady gives you a small smile in return, but it doesn’t reach her eyes, which were filled with worry. She grabs your hand, squeezing it gently as she begins to tell you something that you really can’t comprehend over the ringing in your ears.

After a while of her speaking to you and you babbling nonsense in return, you try to sit up abruptly. Both Cassian and Feyre are on you in an instant, pushing you gently back onto your side, quickly telling you that you need to lay down and stay there.

“What is it?” Feyre asks quickly, gripping your hand as you easily give up and fall onto the bed, “Is something wrong, do you need something?”

“Az…” you whimper, fighting the urge to fall asleep right then and there, “W—Where’s Azriel?”

The shadowsinger had been outside the door keeping watch, but his shadows had been listening in on the conversation within as well. The shadows curled around his ear, whispering your name to him, telling him that you requested him, so he silently strode in when he heard. Your tired eyes lit up at the sight of him in the doorway, hand slipping from Feyre’s to weakly beckon him over to you.

Something about seeing you in this state tugged on his heart, tugged on it so much it felt like it was going to rip from his chest. He couldn’t deny your request for him to come closer, not when you looked so desperate and in so much pain, not when his absence in Windhaven was part of the reason you were in this situation in the first place.

He made a mental note to ask Rhys who did this to you as he made his way over to the chair Feyre left for him to sit in, wanting nothing more than to show them what Truth Teller could do.

Azriel’s hand fell next to you on the bed and you immediately rested your own atop his, grinning widely as what felt like delusion set into your bones. Shadows twined around your fingers while the others skittered across your wings as if to soothe them.

“They may—may not be able to save my wings, Az.” you choked out, a bitter giggle coming out as you spoke.

“I’m sure Madja will be able to heal you right up, Y/N. You’ll be better in no time.” Azriel assured you, but he wasn’t sure that was entirely true. “She’ll be here any minute.”

“I—I don’t even care. I just—just need my mate.” you say abruptly while shaking your head, voice barely above a whisper now as you stare at the male, glassy eyes meeting his sharp yet confused gaze.

“Mate?” he replies with a furrowed brow, lips drawing into a frown at your words. He was wondering if you even knew what you were saying at this point, if you were just saying whatever came to your disoriented mind.

“Mate.” you say a little louder this time and the whole room is silent as you reach out for Azriel, your shaky and blood-crusted hand coming up to stroke his cheek. “My mate.”

Your eyes fluttered close with those words, a smile on your lips as you’re overtaken by sleep in the moment. Your hand falls from Azriel’s cheek and onto his lap, and that’s when he feels it. That’s when he feels the shadows of his mind clearing, bringing that band of golden thread to the forefront. A band of golden thread that was tying his soul to yours.

Before Azriel could process the situation unfolding in front of him, Cassian was pulling him from the chair so Feyre could tend to you once more. The High Lady tried to wake you, but nothing worked. Thankfully, Rhysand and Madja rushed into the room mere minutes after you became unconscious, immediately going to work on getting you back to consciousness and ready to be healed.

Cassian tugged at Azriel’s shoulders as the whirlwind began, trying to drag him into the hallway. The shadowsinger resisted, standing behind Feyre as he watched you closely. You awoke immediately when Madja began to tend to your bloodied wings, the sensitive membrane torn to shreds. A cry escaped your lips as she gently worked on them, as Feyre tried her best to keep you in one spot while Madja worked her magic.

Azriel watched with wide eyes, rage rippling through his body as he watched you writhe in pain. He wanted nothing more than to take away your pain, to make sure nobody ever hurt you again, to keep you safe with him forever.

Your brother continued to try to move Azriel from the room, knowing it wouldn’t end well if he continued to watch you writhe in pain as Madja made quick work of healing you. He continued to resist, shoving Cassian multiple times before Rhysand breached his mind, stopping him in his tracks.

I’ll make sure she’s okay. He spoke to Azriel in his mind, staring him down as he squeezed your hand, beginning to take away your pain. She’s safe with me and I’ll take away whatever pain I can, but we need you to leave before you do anything stupid. The bond is too new and who knows what you’ll do if you continue to see her like this.

Azriel straightened against Cassian’s grip, nodding at Rhys as he silently assured him that you would be okay. Eventually, he let your brother guide him into the hallway, noting the glamour Rhysand had added to the bedroom to drown out your cries as Cassian closed the door.

It isn’t until he steps into the hallway that he’s finally able to fully comprehend what just happened. That’s when guilt and fear and pain wash over his body, stinging his chest all at once, right down the bond.

“This–It’s my fault.” he says, falling back against the wall opposite to your bedroom in the hall, his legs unable to hold him up anymore. “I–I could’ve fucking stopped this, I should’ve been there, I should’ve known that this would happen–”

“Woah, Az.” Cassian interjects, reaching for Azriel’s shoulders once again. “You and I both know how stubborn she is. She would’ve refused to go if you were going, and you know it. She thought she had to prove herself to Rhys, just like she always does.”

“I should’ve just–Fuck!” Azriel yelled, shoving his hands into his hair to tug on it roughly out of frustration, “I should’ve fucking sent my shadows, I could’ve seen their plan, I–”

“Azriel.” Cassian interrupted once again, grabbing the shadowsinger to get his attention. “Would you shut up for one second? She would’ve torn those shadows–and you–to shreds if you did that. She’s still under the impression that you fucking hate her, Az.”

Azriel let out a shuddering breath at the thought, a whirlwind of emotions taking over. His mind was racing as he thought of you in the next room, how his shadows couldn’t even infiltrate Rhysand’s glamour to see if you were alright. None of it made sense, you deserved more than him, you should be with someone who actually could keep you safe.

“How long have you known?” Azriel pressed, stern gaze on Cassian as he finally let go of his shoulders.

“Az–”

“How. Fucking. Long.” he insisted, blue siphons flaring with power at his wrists as he reached for your brother.

Cassian sighs, shoulders sagging in defeat as he looks to the helpless man in front of him. “Two–Two years.” he’s quiet as he speaks, voice wavering in fear of what anger the fresh mating bond could bring out of his brother.

“You’ve known for two fucking years?” Azriel seethes, gripping Cassian’s leathers tighter as he growls, “how fucking dare you–”

“I couldn’t tell you and you know it, Az.” Cassian says, releasing himself from Azriel’s grip.

“You’re my brother–”

“And she’s my twin, my real fucking blood sister. I couldn’t betray her like that.” he interjected, shaking his head at the shadowsinger. “She would’ve torn me to shreds, then came for you next. You should know that nobody should interfere with a mating bond, you had to find out from her.”

Azriel took a deep and shaky breath at his words, knowing that Cassian was right in every sense of the word to not tell him for all this time. Eventually he nods at Cassian, deciding that words probably aren’t his strong suit at this moment, he didn’t want to say or do anything he’d regret later.

“C’mon, we should go somewhere else to get your mind–”

“No.” Azriel snarled, shaking his head firmly as his shadows swirled at his shoulders, siphons flaring with that ultramarine power once again. “I need to stay here, to see that she’s safe.”

There was something damn near animalistic in Azriel’s eyes as Cassian gazed at him. In that moment, he knew there would be no getting through to the shadowsinger, not when his mate was on the brink of death on the other side of the door.

Cassian nodded slowly at him, watching carefully as Azriel finally let go of his shoulders. The shadowsinger’s own shoulders sagged and he leaned to rest on the wall behind him, while trying to calm himself. He needed to be in that room, needed to see you, needed to hold you, but he knew there was no use in trying. Not even his shadows could slip under the door to check on you, Rhysand had glamoured the whole room to high hell in order to keep him out and to keep your healing as uninterrupted as possible.

He knew it would take hours, maybe even days before that door opened again, but he didn’t care. He’d stay right there waiting for that lock to click and that glamour to fall just so he could see you again.

And so wait he did.

He waited one hour, which turned into two, which turned into four, which turned into eight.

The wait was so long that Cassian eventually pulled two chairs out of his bedroom so they could sit, and the House nearly forced them to eat some stew that was placed upon the empty chair Azriel refused to occupy.

He only paced, mind racing with thoughts of you, of how he couldn’t feel you any time he tried to tug on the bond. He wasn’t sure how the mating bond worked, how much a glamour could mask it or how your unconsciousness would affect it. Every time he tugged on that golden strand in his chest, he felt nothing on the other end, just resistance that he could only assume was from the inability to fully reach you.

Each unsuccessful tug only drove him closer to insanity, closer to clawing down the door between the two of you to see if Rhysand was truly the reason he wasn’t able to reach you or not.

Just as Azriel was on the verge of another outrage, after waiting for nearly ten godsdamned hours, your bedroom door’s lock clicked. Both Cassian and Azriel’s attention whirled to the door, only to see Feyre standing at the door frame. The door was barely cracked, just enough to see her face, hiding the commotion behind her, hiding the sight of you behind her.

The moment the door opened, a wave of nausea flowed through Azriel’s stomach, the smell of you, the smell of your blood reaching his nose immediately.

The High Lady held out a hand as Azriel took a step towards the door, ready to push her over to finally see his mate.

“She’s waking up now,” Feyre interjects, giving the shadowsinger a stern look that tells him to behave, “she might be really confused right now, she’s been in and out of consciousness for a while so who knows what she really remembers. Be gentle with her, she may not remember what she said before you left.”

Azriel stands up straighter at the High Lady’s words, nodding sternly at her command as Cassian stands at his side finally. Both take a moment to compose themselves while she pulls the door open, revealing the room behind her at last.

The room is in much less of a disarray than they’d expected, likely thanks to a simple snap of Rhysand’s fingers. The only blood to be seen in the room is on your wings, which is currently being wiped away by Madja as you stir slowly.

It takes everything in Azriel not to run up to your side right then, to push Mor from the chair next to you, to take your head into his hands and kiss you and never let you go. But he holds back, waiting for you to finally wake from your sleep.

Your eyes flutter open a few moments later, a wave of confusion washing over you as you do. The last thing you really remember is being picked up by Cassian, off the floor of that Gods forsaken cabin. You really don’t remember how or when you made it back to the House of Wind, or what actually happened to you. At this point, judging by the shooting pain in your back, you weren’t sure if you wanted to remember what happened to you.

Your brother’s name was the first thing to fall from your lips, your weak hand reaching out for him with a watery smile. Tears filled your eyes as he took a step toward you.

“You’re a stubborn little shit, you know that?” Cassian said with a bittersweet smile, eyes flickering between your bruised face and your tattered wings.

“Gotta keep you on your toes all the time,” you rasp out, a small laugh from you finally filling the tense air.

Cassian sat next to you, talking to you lowly as he tried to keep things light, tried to keep your spirits up after he caught a glance of how mangled your wings were, how ruined they might be.

You barely noticed the shadowsinger standing behind him until a shadow skittered across your stomach, trailing to your bandaged wings to survey the damage. It wasn’t until then that you stopped to look at him, to see how stoic he looked while staring at you. His face paled, his jaw clenched as he stood silently at the foot of the bed.

“Are you here to mock me, shadowsinger?” your voice interrupted his thoughts, finally making him look up to meet your eyes.

Azriel’s brow furrowed at your words and Cassian tensed at your side. He only shook his head, an apologetic look crossing his face as he opened his mouth to speak, only to be cut off by you.

“If you’re here to tell me how I should’ve just sucked it up and gone with you, how I’m only a weak female and I can’t handle missions like this, I don’t want to hear it.”

Oh. Oh, no.

Realization struck Azriel in an instant, you didn’t remember anything about what you’d said to him. He tried to tug on the bond, a sympathetic look in his eyes as his heart lurched for you, but felt nothing.

The pain tonics, they mess with the bond. She cannot feel you, brother, Rhysand said to him wordlessly, watching quietly from the other side of the room, she does not know that you’re reaching out to her, she doesn’t know that you know.

Azriel felt like he was going to vomit, he couldn’t handle it anymore. He couldn’t go another minute without you knowing that he knew. But he knew better, he knew better than to throw this on you while healing from something so severe. So he looked at you once more with a calm and stoic expression, into your fiery eyes, knowing you were putting on a show of hatred just for him.

“I wasn’t going to mock you, Y/N.” Azriel said matter-of-factly, shaking his head at the thought, “I was only going to tell you that I hope you feel better soon, and that I am sorry, for everything.”

Your stern gaze wavers for a moment, confusion crossing your once stern face at his last words. Before you could retort, he was rushing out the door, leaving one shadow behind to keep watch over you.

He thought you needed space, that you needed this time away from him to heal fully before he threw his heart at you, before he confessed how in love he’d been with you for so damn long.

So he left. Left the House of Wind immediately, deciding that you were better off without him for now.

But he missed the tear that slipped from your eye once he fled the room. He missed the way you were tugging against the bond as well, the golden strand too clouded by the tonics and poisons running through your veins to reach either side.

He missed the way you let out a small sob at his absence, fully recoiling into yourself as you thought that the only male you wanted couldn’t stand to be with you for more than two seconds.

tag list: @minaethrym @5onedirection5 @bubybubsters @brieflyclassymortal @fxckmiup @ubigaia @mariahoedt @buttermilktea11 @annaaaaa88 @lilac5ix @mybestfriendmademe @landofpetrichor @lilah-asteria @darlingbravebelle @wingardiumweasley @coolepowersthings @cherry-cin @mendes-bae @thatacotargirl @esposadomd @saltedcoffeescotch @scatteredstardustt @ccacotartoglover @nickishadow139 @hayley-jadee @i-am-infinite @whyonearthisyourusernamethi-blog @acourtofdreamsandshadows @username199945 @b0xerdancer-writes @anuttellaa @azzydaddy @aunicornmademedoit @dream-alittlebiggerdarling @darkbloodsly @anainkandpaper @craigorynotgregory @acourtofmoonlightandstars @sourapplex @thatgirlangelb @405rry @prrius-tylersapphire @rogersbarnesxx @aelincaddel @marina468 @lwyourx @kennedy-brooke @mp-littlebit @sstanbarnes @happypeanutstrawberry @whyshouldihaveanam3 @larissa01-blog2 @superspideyparker @touchstarvedandinlove @cheneyq @pvrkacciosan @savannah-0000 @acourtofbatboydreams @melmo567 @everyonesluvah @theintimatewriter

#azriel #azriel x reader #azriel shadowsinger #acotar #azriel angst #azriel x you

856 notes · View notes

foxglovebells · 1 year

Text

The Winter Writer

Azriel x Reader

Summary: One day Mor brings her best friend to the house of wind for game night with the inner circle. Azriel takes immediate interest, as well as Nesta, Feyre, and Gwyn when they find out she’s the author to their favorite smutty romances.

Warnings: None

Notes: My first fic! This is just the first part and there will me much more to come (😏)

****************************************************

“They’re going to love you” Mor squeals excitedly as she finishes up your makeup. “You have no idea.”

You and Mor had been best friends for centuries. You both knew absolutely everything about each other. Even after all these years you had still never met her family. Though, you weren’t very adamant on pushing it because they made you very nervous. She didn’t want them to scare you away, she had said, when you brought them up once.

You take a deep breath to gather your nerves before replying, “I don’t know Mor, I feel like I’m intruding on your inner circle.” You look up at her from where you’re sitting on the vanity in your apartment. Mor stands and looks down on you as she roles her eyes.

“I don’t think anyone could hate you, you’re like the most likable person I’ve ever met, and trust me, I’ve been alive for a long time.”

You moved to Velaris from the winter court half a century ago. Mor had said she would feel more secure knowing that her best friend was safe and not being caught up in the Amarantha drama. Having parents that had high positions in the Winter court put you too close to danger for Mor’s liking.

While you had never met the inner circle, you had heard almost everything about each one of them. Rhysand was the almighty, powerful high lord who had the biggest soft spot for everyone he loved and cared about. Feyre was kind, selfless, and had a touch for art. Cassian was an Illyrian who was cocky and funny but also gave the best hugs. Amren was a little scary and fierce, but she would always stand up and fight for her friends. Nesta was a tough shell to crack, but she still managed to be the best to talk to when you need advice. Elain was quiet but kind and nurturing. And Azriel, oh Azriel, you had never met him, but Mor always described him as silent, observant, kind, and so many more things. Was it possible to have a crush on someone you’d never met? You based a couple of your book characters on what you had heard of him. Of course, he could be completely different than what you imagined, in that case, you would be severely disappointed.

But even having heard all these things, you’ve yet to meet a single one of them, and because of this you were freaking the fuck out.

“I promise, hun.” She places her hands on either side of your face and looks straight into your eyes, “Plus, I know for a fact that the girls will like you. They have a little book club that has read every single one of your books.” A mischievous expression takes over her face.

“No way, Mor.” Your eyes widen. “You didn’t tell me they’ve read my books.” You shoot up from the vanity chair and pace through the room with your hands twirling a piece of hair to occupy yourself. “Cauldron, Mor, that would have been nice to know.”

Mor throws her head back in laughter, “They haven’t just read them darling, you’re a common talk amongst the library, you’re their favorite.” She walks up and boops you on the nose, you swat her hand away. “Nesta and Feyre are always talking about how sexy they are, I’ve even seen Amren reading one from time to time.”

“Is it too late to back out now?” You sigh in exasperation.

“Even if it wasn’t, I wouldn’t let you.”

You glare at her, “I know.”

“Come on, sugar plum, we gotta get going.” Before you can protest she takes your hand and winnows you out of your apartment.

***

“Do we even know if she’s real?” Cassian mutters as he nurses a glass of whiskey. “I mean, Mor said she’s lived here for nearly 50 years—and been friends with her for longer—but we’ve never met her.”

“Probably because she didn’t want your horny ass to hit on her.” Azriel buts in as Rhys lets out a laugh in agreement.

“Your not much better, brother.” Cassian shoots him an amused glare but it’s ignored as Az takes a sip from his glass.

“I can’t say I’m not curious, though.” Rhys starts, “Mor said she was trustworthy enough to know about Velaris, and that she knew her for centuries before she moved here.”

“And yet we’ve never met her and when ever she comes up Mor shuts the subject down.” Cassian replies.

It did make Azriel wonder, he could send his shadows to get information on her, but she’s coming tonight so he might as well just wait and ask her—like a normal person.

All at once the 3 brothers perked up as soon and the felt someone winnow into the house.

“Guess it’s time to finally meet the mystery girl.” Rhys says before sauntering off and going to the main living area where the girls were already there drinking wine and gossiping about the latest book by their favorite author—Y/n Y/l/n.

***

When they enter the room Feyre, Nesta, Elain, Gwyn, and Emerie are all sitting in front of the fire, drinking wine and giggling quietly.

“Where’s Nyx, darling?” Was the first thing Rhys asks as he makes his way to Feyre’s side and places a loving kiss on her cheek.

Azriel always envied their mating bond, Cassian’s too. He had waited so long to feel the love of a mate, but he would wait as long as it took. He often tried to occupy his heart with harmless relationships to fill the void that hopefully would one day be filled with his mate. But even after centuries of waiting he had yet to even suspect someone. It made him insecure sometimes, how could anyone love someone as scared and broken as him? So to refrain from thinking these thoughts he buried himself into other activities, spying, reading, training. Anything that could take his mind off of the restless thoughts that invaded his brain.

“He ran off to greet Mor.” She replied while leaning into his kiss.

All the males looked slightly of put as they recalled the new unknown guest around around Nyx. Rhys stood straight and was about to go seek them out when they heard the sound of footsteps making their way towards them from the hall.

They all stood and watched as Mor entered the room followed by someone who was still out of view behind Mor.

Mor moved to the side and revealed the most beautiful female Azriel had even seen in his life. You were wearing a silky slip style dress in a deep midnight blue, it contrasted beautifully to the long white waves cascading down to your waist. Winter court, Azriel thought. What caught his attention the most was the small Illyrian at your side with his hand in yours.

“Daddy I found a girl!” Nyx shouts as he tries to drag you towards his father.

You have a small nervous smile on your face and you allow yourself to be dragged towards Rhysand.

“Nyx!” Feyre shoots up from her seat on the chaise and rushes over to snatch up Nyx, releasing your hand in the process. “I’m so sorry.” She says turning to you.

Mor makes her way back up to your side and you look over to her for reassurance. She nods at you and you look back to Feyre with a sweet smile. “That’s all right, nothing to be sorry about” you reply. “I’m Y/n, you must be Feyre.” Rhysand takes Nyx out of his mates arms and you hold out your hand to shake hers. She shakes her head at your hand and instead wraps her arms around you in a hug. You freeze slightly in surprise but quickly relax and return the hug.

“It’s lovely to finally meet you, Y/n. Mor is awfully protective.” Feyre sends a playful glare to your best friend and she returns it with a sheepish smile. You simply laugh at the exchange.

Mor takes your arm and walks you to the seating area and you take a seat on an armchair close to the fire.

“Y/n,” Mor starts, “This is Nesta, Elain, Gwyn, Emerie and you’ve already met Feyre.” She takes her time pointing to each female around the room. Gwyn and Nesta are sat beside each other on a two seater lounge while Elain sits on the arm chair across from you. Mor walks over to Emerie and lays a hand on her shoulder. You try to hide your smirk behind your hand as you glance between the two of them. The look she gives you is a mix between shut the fuck up and she’s hot isn’t she. It became clear to you that her family doesn’t know about her sexually orientation, that became more clear when you caught the confusion in the eyes of a couple of the others.

“Anyway,” she claps her hands together and walks back to where Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel were standing. “This is Rhysand—“

“Call me Rhys, please, any friend of Mor’s is a friends of mine.” You smile at him before Mor continues.

“Then my most favorite nephew, Nyx, whom you’ve already met.” She walks up and pinched the little boys cheeks, who squirms in his dads arms, resulting in him putting Nyx down. Nyx does something no one expects—especially not you—when he runs up to you, climbs onto your chair, and settles into your lap as if nothing was wrong in the world. Every one stares in shock while you just let it has happen, chuckling slightly.

Azriel watches you along with everyone else, but the thought churning in his mind aren’t ones that revolve around Nyx, no, the only thing he can think about is how, beautiful and sweet you are, he might not be able to forgive Mor for keeping you from him. Of course, not literally, but he had never felt to drawn to someone, especially not someone he had never met in his life.

“Sorry.” You say with a small laugh. “Is he normally this friendly?” You look up to see Feyre snickering and Rhys shaking his head in amusement. Mor just looks as if she’s having a proud mother moment.

“Not usually, but he doesn’t meet new people often.” Rhys supplies. “But if he’s bothering you feel free to tell us, we won’t be offended.”

“Oh no, he’s perfect.” You look to the little boy in your lap who’s the split image of his father. His big violet eyes are looking up at you as you smile down at him.

You remember that you hadn’t been introduced to everyone yet. “And I’m guessing these two are Cassian and Azriel.” You gesture to each of them.

Cassian beamed at you, “The one and only, nice to meet you Y/n.”

“You too, Cassian.”

Azriel kept silent but he gave you a forced tight lipped smile, that made your stomach drop a little. He didn’t like you, you concluded.

You looked over to Mor who noticed the interaction and noticed that slightly devastated look on your face. She was quick to change the subject.

“Nice going, asshole.” Cassian says to Azriel out of your ear shot, “She thinks you hate her.”

“What?” Azriel heart sinks, “Why would she think that?” He could never hate you, he knew it the minute he saw you. He wanted to talk to you but he didn’t know what to say.

“You gave her the same obviously fake smile that you give every female that any of us try to set you up with.” Cassian sends him a looks that screams could you be any more oblivious, “Didn’t you see her smile drop slightly and her look to Mor for reassurance?”

No, he did not, and now he feels like a dick. “I didn’t mean too.” He replies solemnly.

“Y/n’s from the winter court. We became friends the first time a visited when I was a child.” Mor smiled at you cheekily before continuing, “I wanted her to move here a few decades ago—“

“—because you’re like an overprotective mother hen.” You cut her off with a laugh but she shushes you playfully.

“No,” she asserts firmly with a glare in your direction, “Well, yes I guess a little.” The group around you laughs.

“If she’s lived here for decades why have we never met her?” Cassian asks and Mor roles her eyes at the questions.

“Did you not hear Y/n, Cass, protective mother hen.” She gestures to herself while you along with everyone else smiles at the interaction. “She needed protecting from the like of you, all of you and your corrupt sense of humor. Now, drinks.”

“Ugh, Yes please” and other mutters of agreement are heard from all around. Rhysand snaps his fingers and wine appears atop the coffee table at the center of the seating.

Elain pours you a glass and hands it to you, you smile gratefully. Nyx has since fallen asleep on your lap, his face tucked into your neck and you run your hand over his head while paying attention to conversation around you.

“So Y/n, you want to tell everyone what you do for a living?” Mor says, bringing everyone’s attention to you once more, though, you couldn’t help but notice that one particular person attention had been on you the whole time.

You glare at Mor, a real glare this time, no playfulness in your stare. “Morrigan, what did we talk about.” You say to her while everyone listens with interest. She doesn’t reply, but instead hold your stare with a challenging look. Eventually giving up you cave. “I’m an author.”

“I expected something completely different from the way you two were looking at each other.” Nesta laughs as she finished her glass of wine.

“Me too.” Pipes Gwyn who was sitting on the lounge where Feyre had once been. Feyre was now curled up in the lap of the high lord. “Are you published.”

“Um—” you hesitate.

“Yes, she is.” Mor states simply once she’s decided that you’re taking far to long to answer such an easy question.

“Do you think we’d know any?” Gwyn asks curiously. “The girls and I are in a book club, I’m sure we’ve had to at least heard of it.”

“Oh I write under pseudonym, you probably haven’t heard of me.” You attempt to laugh it off, but Nesta and Gwyn seem keen on getting the answer out of you.

“Try us.” Nesta pushes.

“Sellyn Drake.” You say quietly with a slight embarrassed chuckle. Please tell me they haven’t read my books, please, please, ple—

“Fucking shit!” Nesta shoots up, her refilled glass of wine spilling over the lip of the glass. Every female in the room seems to sit up, even Feyre from where she was comfortably tucked into Rhysand.

“You’re kidding, right?” Gwyn shrieks with an excited smile on her face.

“You’ve heard of me?” You say sheepishly.

“Heard of you!” Nesta snaps her fingers and every single book that you’ve ever published appears directly in front of you. You reach for a book, trying not to jostle the sleeping Illyrian in your arms. Opening the book you’re surprised to see annotations on every page, highlighted words and thoughts fill each blank space.

“Um wow, I didn’t expect this.” You laugh as you flip through the pages coming across and especially spicy scene before slamming the book shut and placing it back on the pile.

“Would it be weird if I asked you to sign them?”

“Not at all, how about we meet for coffee sometime, I can even bring the manuscript for my next book, I’ve been looking for some insight on it.” You suggest, a little bit nervous that she might turn you down.

“Holy shit, of course!” She looks over to Feyre, Gwyn, and Emerie. “You know what? What do you think about coming to our next book club meeting?”

You return her excitement at that, “That sounds perfect.”

Nesta excitedly goes to Cassian and plops in his lap. His arms wrap around her waist and kisses her neck.

“You’re the smutty romance author, eh.” Cassian guesses in response to his mates excitement.

Your face burns red and you attempt to hide it by looking away. Azriel watched the exchange with a barely there smirk on his face. Ah maybe he could use that as a conversation starter, he thought. He would only have to get you alone first. He observed that you weren’t to comfortable talking about your occupation in a large group like this with new people. Though, he didn’t understand why an extremely successful author wouldn’t want to flaunt her talents.

“Y/n?” Starts Rhys. “Are you comfortable talking about your family?” He didn’t want to pry, but he was curious, something about you was just so familiar.

“Oh, of course.” You loved your family dearly and enjoyed any excuse to talk about them, especially your sister. “My sister is the lady of the winter court.”

“Viviane?” Feyre asks and you nod in response.

“Yes, we’re fraternal twins.” You smile as you think about your twin sister who was such a talented warrior.

“She’s amazing, and so is my niece, Seely, who was born 3 years ago, about the same age as Nyx actually.” You gesture to the sleeping form wrapped in your arms.

“I hadn’t realized you had such useful connections—” Rhys starts.

“—No.” Mor cuts him off before he can continue. “You are not using my best friend for a winter court alliance. You want an alliance, figure out how to get it without using her as pawn.”

Rhys looked apologetic, “She’s right, I apologize Y/n.”

“No harm done, if it’s any reassurance Kallias and Vivian are rather fond of your inner circle. I’m sure if you ever did want an alliance you wouldn’t have trouble achieving it, with or without my assistance.” You reply, you truly didn’t mind, you actually found it quite comforting that he was willing to talk politics with you, even if it was an odd situation to do so.

A new voice speaks up, surprising everyone in the room. “So you can fight?” Azriel kicks off from his place in the shadows against the wall, finally stepping into the light of the fire and taking the empty seat to your left.

“What do you mean?” You ask him to specify.

“We’ll Viviane is a highly trained warrior, and I’ve seen how well trained the winter court army is. I was wondering if you were trained similarly.”

“Yes, Viviane and I were trained by our father from the moment we could walk.” You smile in remembrance, your father was such a good teacher and was kind and gave you advice on how to improve rather than yelling. Many of your favorite memories were training beside him and your sister. “It’s been several years though, I probably a bit rusty.”

“I could always help.” He rushes out, as if he didn’t really mean to say that. He clears his throat. “I mean, if you ever wanted to train again I would be happy to be your partner.” Azriel cursed himself for not controlling his words, he hoped you wouldn’t turn him down.

“I would love that Azriel, thank you.” You smile widely at him and you look back to the group.

Feyre stands up and begins to make her way towards you. “As much fun as this has been I really need to get Nyx into his bed.”

“Of course, do you want to take him or I would be happy to walk up with you so he doesn’t wake.” You offer, cradling Nyx against your chest in preparation for her answer.

“That would be amazing, Y/n.” She smiles graciously at you. You stand from the comfy armchair and follow Feyre out of the room and through a series of hallways. She comes to a bedroom and you both go in and put Nyx to bed. “I’ve never seen him act so attached to someone new before. He really likes you.”

“I’m glad, I really like him too.” You both make your way back to the sitting room as you yawn.

“I’ve had so much fun, but I really should get going before I become too tired to winnow home.” You stay standing up instead of sitting back down. You were sure that if you sat back down you would surely fall asleep.

“Stay the night, please.” Rhys offers, “you could join us tomorrow for breakfast and training.”

“And a book club meeting, the girls and I have one in the library tomorrow.” Nesta adds while each of the girls agrees.

“I don’t know,” you start to reply “I don’t want to intrude—”

“Y/n! How many times do I have to repeat myself before you process it in you thick skull.” Mor throws her hand up, exasperated. “You. Are. Not. Intruding.”

You fidget with a strand of your snowy white hair before replying. “Just because you feel that way doesn’t mean the others do. You’re biased Mor.”

“Oh Mother.” She pinches the bridge of her nose as if you are a insulant child.

“If you fear that you are intruding I can guarantee that you are not.” Feyre tells you kindly, a much kinder approach than Mor’s.

You’re still hesitant, but you make up your mind. “Alright, I guess I’ll stay.”

Everyone looks content with your response. But it’s Nesta who’s the first to talk. “Perfect. Training starts at sunrise.”

#azriel #azriel x reader #azriel x oc #azriel x you #mor #Rhysand #Feyre #Nyx #Acotar #night court #winter court #author #sellyn drake #books #foxglovebells

844 notes · View notes