#what fuckin reality are these people living in
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Okay so, Thing I realised today
buckle up, it's gonna be something
SO
classic smg34, right?
what do you think of when you remember classic smg34? Angst? Enemies to lovers? Hate so strong could only be love or whatever the name of the trope is? Wrong!
Obsession.
Like, I think he still is, and even the first time we see him, as in 3, his fucking debut episode, albeit he's not that far gone there yet but the beginning of it is right there
he loved 4's content so much, in reality he was trying to make his content so much like 4's as a love letter
no- not that way
like how FNF is a love letter to Newgrounds
except he fuckin sucked at it and it just turned into copying
but like think about it, after that happened, he got obsessed with 4 so much, not just out of hate and to be better than him and all that enemies bullshit but also because he still really admired him and I think he still found it fun to be around him, he just didn't want to admit it (him feeling nice around 4 can also be another thing of their link if we include modern34 as well) because- that's admitting defeat. he's also like, a loner of sorts or at least before all of it, he didn't really have like, a friend to JUST have a friend
even with Bowser, they were kind of friends out of working at the same job so like- and also the dynamics there I bet he wasn't satisfied with
like I bet even beside Bowser he felt lonely, and definitely partly because he way too obsessed with 4 to realise that he actually had people in his life
like lowkey his life kinda crumbled out of his grasp then because he let his obsession with 4 get this much to his head, to the point of doing things without planning even- I mean, I bet he didn't plan to EAT the god damn youtube remote
and like you can kinda see the same thing with his heist gang who were replacing the others in Youtube arc, he didn't care to be a good leader, all he wanted is to satisfy his obsession with 4, which is probably why that crew like, didn't get to grow a stronger dynamic, HE was the weak link in all of this and made the team like that
And now you might be asking, what does this has to do with Trash Friends?
You see, before genesis kicked off and like the whole 10 year anniversary
like AGAIN, AUGh AGAIANNNANANANANANanAN
I mentioned this before and I still hold to it, 3 got to redeem himself not because of suffering, but because of finding an outlet for himself- that ISN'T 4!! He didn't take over the Graveyard to take revenge on 4, he took it over because 1, it was kinda his destiny and 2 because he had to survive somehow and he found purpose in it
And now, shit mellowed out BECAUSE he wasn't so obsessed with 4 anymore, at least not like that
which meant he wasn't in 4's shadows anymore
even though the universe paired them up (in more than one way :3) he wasn't just 4's obsessed kind of stalker anymore
AND NOW- why oh WHY is Trash Friends so significant? Because 3 is fearful and lives in the past
"You are just a worse version of me" it's like he's recalling the past, he doesn't want to go back to that, to go back to the old ways when 4 didn't consider him a friend, he's so so scared of fucking that up and like- like like like- if we go further on this, isn't it so obvious? They're both like, anxiously cling onto the past, even though they've grown now, they keep regressing because of the fear
and I think- I think Trash Friends started to remedy it
BECAUSE it broke the cycle. 3 opened up, 4 realised how he's been thinking in the past too and probably felt awful for it
I don't think it SOLVED it persay but it definitely started to
like I do wish we saw a little more of that with the 2 like, even if just for a tiny scene, taking their time to communicate
because I'm prrretty sure that was what Trash Friends was supposed to be starting
and not gonna lie, probably why we get the silly videos with them working together
but I do wish wish wish we saw a little more of them talking about it
But I can definitely say, there's still things they need to discuss, things to fully get over and to get stronger together, especially pointing at SMG4 simulator with 3 seemingly being an epic rare special catch of sorts and YET still being negative points and also the timer skipping 34, like 4 is trying to push aside his feeling for 3
which is why I think if they do it right with the right things, smg34 becoming canon could be one of the most natural processes of SMG4 history
And thank you for reading! Hope I got you convinced :33
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i do love canon amy & rory but god, does some part of me wish they really had gone with the idea of the doctor picking up a child as a companion (and then later, that child’s best friend with a huge crush on her.) with the rest of the season really not changing at all, except now it’s amelia pond with an angel in her head killing her and lost alone in the woods. it’s little rory who dies and is forgotten and becomes a toy soldier. if this is going to be a fairy tale, then let it be one. children have never been safe in fairy tales.
#it wouldn’t have to change any of the actual plot of the season. except MAYBE amy’s choice but even then i think amy’s choice would be the#one episode where they should be adults. if only for the half where they live in a village in that dream.#because that’s the kind of future that children would dream up. they live in a little cottage and nothing ever goes wrong and their best#friend visits them all the time even though they’ve grown up.#they aren’t actually adults there just children with an idea of what they should be as adults and acting accordingly#and it would still end the same way.#but idk its just. rory’s 2000 years waiting for amy inside the pandorica is already tragic. yes.#now imagine its a kid. a kid in a little roman soldier helmet who will never grow up. who will not leave his best friend.#he loves her and she’s more important than the whole universe and that sort of love is supposed to MEAN something in a fairy tale!#its supposed to melt the ice out of hearts and transform people from stone.#and what that love means here. is that he will have to wait 2000 years. a child and a box.#little rory and the amelia who followed the doctor’s letters to the pandorica. and she doesn’t recognize him again.#and amelia in the pandorica… 2000 years a child trapped in a small box waiting to be rescued.#s5 is already fucked for them but it could be worse. it could be so much worse.#and it would make the doctor choosing to take her place in the pandorica to save the universe later even better.#because who else but the doctor would put the fate of the universe on the shoulders of two children and realize much too late what a#monstrous thing he’d done. and still have to hope. have to hope. that amelia would remember him fondly enough to bring him back to reality.#the logistics of all of this would have been a pain lmao. child labor laws in acting and all that.#BUT. hypothetically. it would have slapped.#doctor who#amy pond#rory williams#<- also this entire time ive been referring to him in my head as rory pond so much that i fuckin. forgot his actual last name.#and then like if you want them to be adults in s6 or whatever you can just timeskip to them getting married and still have amelia remember#the doctor there. it would work. it would.#amelia pond au
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am i going to single-handedly create a fandom about jay holt from the video game "as dusk falls"? i just fuckin might
#i Cant stop thinking about him. ive literally been dreaming about him. i Need to help him. please#hes just a fuckin kid!!! (18?? 19??) hes a TEEN and his family is FUCKED and its not his FAULT#none of this was his fault. he deserves so much fuckin BETTER#also i thought i didnt care about vanessa but then shes got dead brother trauma hi hello hiiiiii#and now jay does too#fuck my LIFE#ive never been one for self-inserts but actually me jay and vanessa hang out regularly in a tree house we built#we laugh and shoot the shit and talk about what losing our brothers have done/are doing to our psyche#as dusk falls#jay holt#vanessa dorland#new hyperfix u say ? this one will be brief hopefully. bc the game is fucking. unfinished. stupid ass cliffhanger ass bjtch ass#plus im rewriting canon so jay has a good young life. no timeskip for MEEE#maria is literally just rambling. hi#.txt#the only fic ive ever written/outlined was about alana bloom from nbc's hannibal & she Deserved a rewrite#but maybe i need to indulge in writing jay holt's better reality TOO#theres a quote. hang on. a quote from a beloved piece of media. why cant i recall what its from rn#but theyre talking about different timelines n shish and one of them says ''maybe this *is* your best reality'' and its SO sad. fuck#is it hannibal. i feel like its always hanniba#no but also i feel like its not???#its like ''this is your best life. youre not getting a better one''#what the eff is that. im gonna be stuck on this forever#EDIT: IT IS FROM FUCKING HANNIBAL. BUT ITS GODDAMN FREDRICK CHILTON OF ALL PEOPLE WHO SAYS IT#''The optimist believes we live in the best of all possible worlds; the pessimist fears this is true.#This is your best possible world Will. Not getting a better one''#fucking CHRIST chilton#lines that go HARD
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The Batman fandom has ruined the words replacement, coffee, cereal, green, pit and so many others lol. Every time I hear those words I just have a fight or flight response 😭
DONT even get me started. you should hear the sigh I make every time I see REPLACEMENT. like yes hate how are so many people so wrong
#whenever im writing Jason im always like. very carefully wording my away around having to use the word at all#bc it’s become such a fuckin Thing#like Guys that’s not How People Talk!!!!!!!!!#also ok last week I said I was gonna write out a short essay on some gripes I have about Jason characterization in the fandom#and like half of it has to do with ‘pit madness’ which. which. hrghfks#basically tldr about it. it’s some fucking bullshit that isn’t really like. canon supported#like ‘pit madness’ is a temporary thing immediately following immersion#and it’s THEORIZED that ra’s al ghul is bonkers evil bc of centuries of compounded use#but Jason went in ONE TIME and it wasn’t a full resurrection#and more importantly I THINK ITS A FUCKING COP OUT#oh here’s a deeply morally complex character who’s arc is defined by his tragedy and anger#what if uhhhh all of these complexities were caused by fuckin pit mind control or some shit and ACTUALLY he’s a good guy uwu#like WAY TO BE BORING I GUESS. GODDAMN#I don’t have evidence to support this but I suspect the whole concept came from morrison’s Jason arc#like as a way to explain why he’s completely off the rails there#but actually what you should do is ignore morrison’s arc bc morrison doesn’t know how to write Jason#ANYWAYS. Batman fandom is so annoying I’m gonna have to stop looking at it and just like#live in mt version of reality where I’m approaching comics from an increasingly scholarly angle#and read the good runs of the comics#and ignore whatever the fuck is going on with the Batman fans#asks#anonanonanonanah
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i think people should be required to do 10 hours of volunteering/community service every time they say the word "problematic"
#i hate it. i hate it. as someone who deals w social media and studies it for a living/career#i fucking hate that word#its like just one step away from people saying 'ive decided these things are all immoral' and lumping them all together#i understand why the word is used i just think its literally meaningless#problematic could mean conflict. it could mean important discourse. it could mean someone has had a negative impact#it could mean that what they said has harmed people#problematic means literally nothing#it provides no nuance no substance#and people throw it around like it means something when it doesnt#and they act like its this Terrible Complex issue when in reality#its just some fuckin buzzword people use to describe a myraid of much bigger much more interesting conversations#and you dont get to the heart of those conversations by throwing the word problematic around as if its some#Genuine label#ur not the social justice activist you think you are just by using the word problematic#and its so frustrating listening to people talk on and on about race and 'problematic' people and issues#idk man. shut up and go volunteer somewhere.#make a difference in your community. spend less time talking about old tweets or pedagogy and more time helping people who need it.#and its also. i also really hate the word problematic bc i feel like the only people who use it#are people who think the world can be divided into black and white#like go help build some houses or pack food for homeless people or garden at ur local park#make a difference and then worry about all this shit#actions speak louder than words#stop talking about how fuckin problematic it is that this guy hates queer people and actually go and help some queer people#etc etc. ugh.
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actually might start looking around how ppl categorize comms to try opening them for a couple if anyone is interested (not set in stone bc im a working student as well but i've been on/off abt opening them more formally for years)
#i HAVE taken them in the sense that someone asks 'do you do comms' and i said 'well NOW i do. what are you shopping for'#so TECHNICALLY if you ask me i already will consider it esp if its directly with one of my current interests.#but ive never felt my art was at a level where i could properly open them. felt like i wouldn't do people justice drawing outside#my interests and what i usually draw#but im now actually confronting the reality that living with teeth in your mouth is pretty expensive! 👍#i think i need to practice full body drawing more before i fuckin do that tho nooooooo
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potentially triggering but ultimately harm reductionist statement about how people treat those with suicide ideation below, just a warning!
it's pretty fuckin rich that people tell suicidal people that they're "being selfish" by wanting to die, because it could not be more selfish to expect someone to just continue suffering through a life they do not want simply because their death would make them sad.
the people who say that kind of thing never want to offer any genuine help to the suicidal person that will change their life circumstances in a lasting way. they never want to house them, get them medical care, pay off their debts, introduce them to new friends, nurse them through a years-long trauma recovery process, get them a pet, drive them to a support group every week, buy them their groceries, clean their house, listen to them talk about their tough feelings for the millionth time.
lasting healing within a dramatically different and better life is never what they want for the suicidal person. they just want the person to not do anything that would make them sad. and not look too sad when they are around them, either, because even if they do white-knuckle their way through a painful existence, they are expected to also make it look easy.
but it's funny, isn't it, that by pushing away all thoughts of sadness, all thoughts of suicide, the person who says such a dismissive thing to the suicidal person is revealing how much they are on the brink of despair themselves. if, when faced with a suicidal person, your number one goal is to prevent their suicide for the sake of your own emotions rather than to improve circumstances for the suicidal person themselves, well, your own emotional grip on reality must be quite tenuous indeed. if you think the most important emotionally reality about a suicide is how it impacts you and not the person that has done it, well, you really must think that it's normal to expect other people to just constantly silently suffer for one another.
there's almost a bit of sick envy that i sometimes hear when people claim that they suicidal are "selfish." the statement almost seems to betray that everybody thinks of suicide at one point or another, that everyone has been in enough pain before that they've wished for it to end, but that since they have endured, they expect everyone else to endure the same for them, so that they don't slip into despair again as well.
it's so offensive because it is such a deeply missed opportunity. instead of batting away the statements of a suicidal person as if they were the greatest, most evil taboo, a person could really sit with them in their despair and say hey, I have felt that way too.
If only we lived in a world where acknowledgement of suicide ideation was not so taboo. Even psychologists and psychiatrists treat it as this untouchable thing, they freak out and jump into action and rob you of your body autonomy if you are willing to voice that you have thought of it. but virtually everyone has thought of it at one point or another, and some live with thoughts of it all the time forever but still have basically decent lives that they experience as worthwhile.
the legal apparatus that exists to prevent suicides at all costs have made it too risky for any kind of healthcare professional to allow the frank acknowledgement of suicide ideation to happen. hell, even the protections that have evolved online to supposedly "protect" suicidal people by filtering out content about suicide and redirecting those browsing for information about it to suicide prevention resourcse has, counterproductively, served to make the state of suicidality even more unspeakable. it cannot be spoken about, cannot be posted about, cannot be acknowledged, is not permitted, is never allowed to just be.
and that harms suicidal people so much.
we are so deeply selfish and cowardly in how we approach suicide and suicidal people.
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So.... reality isn't real
Imagination is real
Reality is already powered by imagination
And imagination is the core of reality
So basically I created all this with my imagination and reality always changes depending on my thoughts cause my thoughts change my imagination too and change my assumptions so basically my reality changes and finally
My face isn't real - that's why it can change with my thoughts
My body isn't real - that's why it can change with my thoughts
These people in my reality (which isn't real) aren't real - that's why they always change with my thoughts
Everyone isn't real - that's why they always change with my thoughts
What they think about me isn't real - that's why it always changes with my thoughts
When they talk about isn't real - that's why it always changes with my thoughts
They are changeable and it all depends on me my thoughts my imagination ME AND ONLY ME
which is basically self!
Self is the only real thing in my reality
self = void state = awareness = pure consciousness = god (which is me)
Pretty simple
So.... basically entering/waking up in my void state is the only real thing in here since everything else is not real then entering/waking up in my void state must be just normal it's just me I am already within myself but I am aware of this physical reality at the same time I am consciousness so I am aware of being pure consciousness that's why entering/waking up in my void state is easiest thing for me cause I am aware of my SELF and me being PURE CONSCIOUSNESS so yeah that's literally it - just be - just enter - just wake up there - just be aware of already having what you want
Life is a literal fuckin dream so manifest whatever you want fr idek what the hell are you waiting for
Work on your self-concept - if you can't or don't know how I got you you can message me and buy the self-concept tape currently discounted btw
Stop surviving - LIVE FOR A MOMENT for yourself
#law of assumption#loa#neville goddard#loassumption#self concept#void success#loa success#self development#success stories loa#self esteem#non dualism#non duality#nonduality#nondualism
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Yandere! Cowboy x New in town! Teacher! gn! Reader
Save a horse, RIDE A WHAT?!
Okay i'm not that knowledgeable about the Ranch life, I only got this prompt from a *ehem* cowboy Ghost (from COD) prompt...
Yandere cowboy name: Knoxx Wyatt
TW: Implied sexual encounter, yandere shenanigans.
The Wyatt family.
They were THE ranchers of the town they live in.
You need cattle? They got them. Dairy? Sure. They even own a winery for goodness sake.
They also protect the town from outsiders and rogues.
But the most impressive part of their ranch is their horses. Their horses are award winning, with the most impressive breeds out there with such powerful legs for jumping, and the shiniest coasts to boast.
So it was clear that their horses are very important to them. So important in fact that every child born into the family gets their own horse once they turn 5.
When Knoxx got born, Mr. and Mrs. Wyatt was immediately smitten with their son. He's a miracle child after all. His mother, suffering from PCOS, considers Knoxx as a miracle child.
So naturally, he was spoiled rotten.
By the time he got to 5 years old, he was given one of the most powerful horse breeds in the world, a Belgian Draught.
The town was shook at first. A Belgian Draught? Even if the Wyatt family is known for their horses, a Belgian Draught is still a very prestigious horse breed none of their family members had handled.
Yet Knoxx proved everyone wrong by wrangling the horse even such a young age.
The horse, named Red, grew alongside the prodigy, Knoxx.
It was almost like Knoxx can talk with the animals with how he can tell what the cattle and the horses need by just a few huffs, belts, and trots. He's also a smart boy, absorbing information and relaying it effectively to the point he immediately got the senior rancher position by the age of 10.
Knoxx was mostly passive, only focuses on the ranch and the school. He's a gentleman, nice, polite, plus the fact that he's handsome, he's a heartthrob in the sleepy town he lives in.
Naturally, by the time he graduated with a double degree of Biology and Agriculture, he's the ideal bachelor of almost everyone.
And yet, he's not settling yet.
He felt like he just can't.
Because nobody can look past his polite smiles. No one can see his bored eyes, his arrogant sneer, his small, annoyed scoffs.
"Do they think they can measure up to me? THE Knoxx Wyatt? Dream fuckin' on."
In reality, he's an arrogant, entitled cowboy who thinks that everyone is below him.
Even going as far as letting his bloodlust win sometimes, silently and quietly killing the people who dared to be stupid around his precious cattle and horses.
Sometimes. It would be suspicious if it happened frequently, right?
He has a reputation to protect, after all.
So with this, all he could do is put the brim of his cowboy hat low, and take care of his ranch, and his ole' Red who's still alive and kicking.
But that arrogance will crumble once he met you.
"Fuck! Red! Where are you, boy?!"
"Red! Come on boy! This is not funny!"
Knoxx ran around the town, his boots clinking as his loud steps disturbed the peaceful town.
Knoxx was panicking. Red, his old horse, is missing. One of the hired ranchers forgot to lock the gate before he left the ranch.
Let's just say that rancher was sure to remember next time, his head almost being lobbed off with a rake that Knoxx may or may not have thrown.
As he got closer and closer to the raging rivers, his heart pounded. All he could see is the hoof marks that's definitely Red's making it's way to the river. He felt lightheaded, almost like he's about to puke from the stress and anxiety.
He may be a... Murderer, but he still has his moments, alright?
He got to the riverbank and his heart lodged to his throat when he saw a person pulling Red to the edge with all their might, their formal clothes wet. A telltale sign they pulled Red all the way from the middle of the river to the edge.
The person, not noticing Knoxx, continued to pull Red with the lead attached to the horse. Their legs were shaking, but they pulled with all their might until Red finally got to the edge.
"Darlin!" Knoxx yelled, running towards to Red and holding the old horse's head to his forehead. "You gave me a scare, boy!"
Knoxx turned towards the person and his cold heart slowly melted as they wrung their outfit from the water.
"Excuse me, your name, sweetheart?"
The person's head shot up, their eyes wide, tired, yet full of vigor. Maybe it was from the adrenaline, but Knoxx swore it was sparkles.
Or was it his eyes sparkling?
"I'm y/n."
"Y/n..." The way your name rolled on his tongue felt so good.
"Well, sweetheart. Thank you for saving my horse here. I'm sorry. You got your cute outfit wet too." You blushed, laughing it off.
"It's okay. I saw an animal in need and I immediately dove without thinking." You reasoned, shaking off the water. "Although, i'm probably late to my class."
Knoxx's heart sank. Are you not of age? A student?
"School? Are you new to this town? I've never seen ya around."
"Oh yes! I'm the new teacher. Well, I don't think i'll give the best first impressions with this outfit." You laughed sheepishly.
A teacher? His mind went haywire. You're an academic, it's quite a turn on.
"I'm sorry, sweetheart. You got wet because of me."
Hmm? Why does that sound--
Knoxx bit his lip and rubbed his thighs together at the sudden heat running inside of him. God.
"Oh don't worry. It's okay. I gotta go though, although I don't know how to explain the situation." You smiled softly, grabbing your bag that was discarded to the side. "I'll go then."
Knoxx was upset. He wanted to spend time with you more.
Then there's also the scratching feeling in his chest and throat that roared at the thought of you going out of his sight.
He gulped, and took his hat off and placed it on your head. Sweat riddling his face.
'Please don't know what this means please don't know what this means please don't know what this means...'
Knoxx almost buckled over when you looked at him with curious and ignorant eyes.
"Your hat? Why did you give me your hat?" You asked, feeling up his cowboy hat. It felt high quality and nice. Yet it felt foreboding. You don't know why.
"Don't worry your pretty little head over it." Knoxx said, smirking lazily. "Just wear that. They'll know what that meant."
You tilted your head and Knoxx gulped once more, shaking his head. And ignoring the prominent hardness between his legs.
"You must be cold. Come on, let me give you a ride to the school. I'll explain the situation to them." Knoxx held your waist, his body so close to you that you can smell his musk of pine, dirt, and wine.
And as he gave you a ride to the school, you swore that the townspeople's eyes were glued to you, and the hat on top of you.
"Knoxx! How's the new teacher? Are they settling well here?" The mayor of the town asked, eating his snacks.
Knoxx nodded and sighed. It was already a month, and it felt like a fever dream for him.
A beautiful fever dream he won't let go off.
"They're doing fine. The students love 'em." Knoxx said, chuckling and settling back on his chair.
They were in a saloon right now, drinking and eating the afternoon away. Knoxx just finished his daily patrol so he decided to settle inside the saloon when the mayor sat down with him to eat.
"Well, i'm glad to hear that." The mayor cleared his throat before his eyes widened to the door.
Knoxx followed his eyes and his gaze softened, yet also became predatory as he saw you walk inside.
"School's done, sweetheart?" Knoxx asked loudly, making you jump and clear your throat. A blush on your cheeks.
"Yes. Just finished. I'm just gonna go get a drink before heading home." You said, adjusting the collar of your outfit before going to the bar hastily.
Knoxx chuckled lazily, his bitemarks from last night's love making was visible from here, despite your attempts to hide it.
Yet his eyes went to the mayor's, who is looking at you with a hint of desire in his gaze.
Knoxx gripped his whiskey glass and spun the barrel of his revolver slowly, letting it click softly to the right position.
It seems that his sweetheart is a magnet for bandits ready to snatch them up.
But that's okay.
This cowboy will not let anybody steal you from him.
Save a horse,
Ride a cowboy.
#yandere boyfriend#yandere imagines#yandere male#yandere writing#male yandere x reader#tw yandere#yandere x darling#yandere x you#yandere fic#yandere drabbles#lizzaneiaelizalde
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Eddie, without prompting, proclaims that anyone who is only willing to eat pussy if it's shaved, is a coward
I wasn’t sure how to do this “without prompting” so it’s more there’s minimal prompting
18+ content MDNI
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“Okay, okay, wait a sec.” Eddie said hastily, moving your arms from around his neck so he could hold your hands. “What’s up?”
Fuck, he caught on way too fast. “Just don’t think I’m into being eaten out.” You mumbled, averting your gaze to anywhere but his face.
In reality, you’d forgotten to shave your pubes. The other times any one had gone down on you, you were trimmed, if not totally bare. When you sieve through too many cheesy magazine articles about sex, you tend to pick up what the societal perspectives are. Rather than forming your own.
Shaving was a pain. It was itchy. You nicked yourself at least once every time. Reaching every pube covered area was difficult. You hated that it was just sort of expected.
Eddie didn’t look the least bit convinced by your excuse. “You don’t think you’re into it?” He said fixing you with a curious look. “No one eaten you out before?” Now he just looked horrified, but on your behalf.
“No, no, people have. It’s just-“ you sat up and tried to gather together the right words. It was unlikely that Eddie would be put off by hair - but you’d thought that about George Ulrich last year and he’d recoiled at the very sight of it.
“We can give it a try and if it’s not your thing then we can do something else. How’s that sound?” Eddie smiled, perching himself close to you and kissing your forehead.
You wanted to ride his face more than anything by that point. So, you were just going to have to bite the bullet and deal with any consequences. “I didn’t shower or shave.” You mumbled, chewing the inside of your cheek. This felt like having sex for the first time again and it was just painfully awkward.
“Hmm?”
“I said I didn’t have a chance to shower, so there’s hair. Like a lot.”
Eddie was silent for just a touch too long. His big eyes had widened and he just stared at you - his stare always did make you squirm a little.
“Can I see? I really wanna see.” Eddie rasped, still looking at you, but with a much warmer gaze.
For a split second, you sat in surprise. Pleasant surprise at his request. The slight desperation in his voice only served to make your stomach tighten and your cunt throb.
“Uh, sure. Yeah. As long as you’re sure about-“
“I’m so sure.” Eddie wasted no time in hiking your thighs closer to him, laying you down again and clawing your underwear to the side. He deftly ran his fingers across the hair around your cunt, gathering wet as he stroked. It was like Eddie was fascinated or mesmerised by you and your body.
His calloused fingertips flicked your clit and caused you to groan out a moan. “Hair’s not an issue, got it.” You sighed, melting back into lumpy pillows as Eddie continued to explore you.
“Anyone who’s only willing to eat pussy if it’s shaved is a fuckin’ coward.” Eddie stated, looking up at you with a smile. It was a reassuring smile - all comfort and admiration. He really was grateful that you let him get this far. He would have been good with just kissing you at that party and living on cloud nine from there.
Before you could response, Eddie dove into you. He was licking and sucking at your clit and hole, wishing he could focus on it all at once. Thick fingers soon came up to press into your cunt and making you whine for more. Any friction at all. Anything he could give you.
“You like this, huh?” Eddie mumbled, pulling away from your sopping cunt by a hair. “Said you wouldn’t like getting tongue fucked, but look at you.” He sang ‘you’ with a laugh and grabbed at your hips - wiggling you closer to his face.
“Never had you down there so,” you whined, your voice sounding hoarse as knotted your fingers into Eddie’s wild hair. “God - fucking yes, yes, Eddie.”
“The flattery’s doing it for me, keep going. Please.” Eddie groaned into your cunt. From his nose downwards was pressed into you. He was desperate to get as close to you as physically possible. To taste you, smell you, fuck you. Whatever you’d let him do.
“Your fingers are so much bigger than mine.” You sighed with a smirk, pulling at Eddie’s hair to make him look at you. “Bet your cock’s gonna split me in two.”
At your filthy words, Eddie doubled down his efforts. Sucking your clit into his mouth and flicking it with his wet tongue - drool running down the side of his mouth. The fingers inside you crooked just right and rammed into your soaked hole.
“Cum on my fuckin’ face. C’mon, god, please cum on my tongue. Need it. Need it.” Eddie was chanting and rambling.
The sound of it all was obscene. Beautiful and raw. But obscene. Slick squelching and hoarse panting filled Eddie’s bedroom as he devoured you like he was starving.
In those moments of ecstasy, you decided to never shave again.
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͙⁺˚*･༓☾ Sink my teeth in you ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
{Ellie Williams x Reader}
Summary: One stupid dare had changed Ellie’s life forever, and the person she cared about the most was suffering because of it.
an: Shes baaaackk!! The amount of feedback you guys gave me for Still Alive had my jaw on the floor, so here’s part two! This will most likely be the last part of the Still Alive story that I’ll be doing, but if you guys do want more of angsty, hot, demon Ellie, please let me know. I also changed my format a little bit, so let me know if you guys prefer this or how I was writing before. I hope you all enjoy this one as much as you enjoyed the last. (Also this one isn’t proofread either sorryyyy)
Warnings: smut! Will be a lot softer and more loving than last time but still…smut. Mentions of blood (don’t worry I don’t get too graphic I can’t handle that shit either), Ellie smoking because bby is stressed and having an identity crisis, angst, use of strap (r!receiving), pet names, shy!reader standing up for herself, Ellie is shamelessly in love with reader, mentions of…spells and rituals?? It’s mainly from memory of Jennifers body and things im making up myself, let me know if I missed anything pleaseee.
You can read part 1 here!
Ellie Williams was fucking dead.
At least she was pretty sure she was dead, she truly couldn’t tell. She felt…different, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t put her finger on what had changed. She was so out of tune with herself, and her thoughts and her actions, it was like she was standing behind a wall while someone else controlled her, and it was fucking scary.
She did know however, that she sure as hell wasn’t human anymore.
It was fucking ridiculous, and she felt like she was losing her mind, but she was pretty sure she knew how this all happened.
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
It was her typical Friday night, hopping from bar to bar with a group of her party friends. They were drinking too much, smoking too much, and she felt herself slowly slipping away from reality with each sip of her drink that she took. She fucking needed it, classes were kicking her ass, and her grades were dropping..
And it was becoming harder and harder to pretend like she wasn’t in love with you.
It was fucking pathetic, because you’ve been her best friend since you guys were like…8 years old, and she’s always felt butterflies whenever she was around you. But she let it go on too far, her feelings settling in the pit of her stomach every time you laid your head on her shoulder, or held her hand whenever you were nervous, and before she knew it she wasn’t 8 years old with a crush anymore, she was well into her 20s and falling in love.
She hated it because she felt selfish, she felt like she was taking advantage of your kindness, of your friendship.
So, she went out with her friends and she got drunk, as one does when they’re hopelessly in love with their best friend.
She was following behind her group of friends, already visiting the fourth bar of the night, and Ellie was mindlessly staring at her shoes hitting the ground, her fists balled up in her pockets, images of your pretty face flashing through her head, when Dina spoke up.
“Let’s go into this one! I think there’s a live band here tonight” She gasped, squinting her eyes as she tried to read the horribly written sign outside. Ellie frowned softly as she tried to as well, leaning in a bit to get a better look at what it said.
Live performance tonight! Violet Skies!
Ellie furrowed her eyebrows as she read, blinking a few times before she sighed, noticing that her friends were already stumbling into the bar without any further questions. “Corny fuckin’ band name…” she mumbled our, taking one more look at the sketchy looking bar before she walked in.
Whoever the hell it was, sure as hell wasn’t popular. The bar had ten people max, and most of them were already too belligerent to even comprehend that there was a live performance. She sighed, making her way to the bar and ordering herself a glass of whiskey.
Her friends were crowded near the stage, creating some what of a make shift audience for the band that would be playing soon. Ellie was miserable, she was getting to a point where she wasn’t even having fun anymore.
She just wanted you, in your comfy little home with your comfy blankets and your sweet smelling lotion that you wore every night. She wondered time and time again why she chose a cold, empty bar over your warm inviting home and even warmer embrace.
She was a coward, that’s why.
She was more than half way done with her drink far too quickly, when the band began to set up for their show. She turned her attention towards them, squinting her drunk eyes a bit as she watched them all tune their instruments and adjust the microphone.
Before she could even realize what was happening, she was being tugged throughout the bar by her arm, by Dina. Ellie let out an annoyed groan, letting the girl drag her around like a rag doll. Once Dina had brought her with the rest of the group in front of the stage, Dina gave her a gentle nudge. “M’not letting you sit at the bar all night like a creep…maybe these guys are good!” She beamed, causing Ellie to roll her eyes gently.
Dina smirked gently as she leaned into her a bit, her voice dropping. “I caught a glimpse of the lead singer…she’s hot”. Dina’s words made Ellie scoff, because Dina knew that she was sulking over you right now. And there wasn’t even any reason to, Ellie was simply the queen of self sabotage.
Ellie opened her mouth to complain, but before she could, the show was starting.
The bright lights that settled onto the stage hurt Ellie’s head, and they weren’t even directed at her. She was just fucking annoyed and she wanted to leave but she also didn’t know where to go because she couldn’t escape her fucking thoughts. And now this godforsaken band was walking on stage and she couldn’t care less and..
Her breath gets caught in her throat, because Dina was right. The lead singer is hot.
Because she reminds Ellie of you.
If she didn’t know any better, she’d think this girl modeled her entire appearance after you. She’s got the same pretty hair color as you, and the corner of her lips turn up the same way yours do when you’ve got that cute little smirk on, and it’s making Ellie feel warm inside because she’s bringing her the same comfort that you bring. Ellie finds that she can’t take her eyes off of her.
The band sucks, and they’re out of tune and the songs are cheesy and it sounds like radio music, but Ellie doesn’t fucking care, because you’re literal twin is standing in front of her on a stage, swaying her hips in a tiny skirt, and she’s too drunk to apply any common sense she has in that moment. She pretends it’s you on stage, putting a show on for her.
It doesn’t help that she’s eye fucking Ellie the entire time.
It burns her because she wonders what you’d look like if you looked at her that way, not some carbon copy, but you, her best friend, her girl. She’s licking her lips, her eyes burning from a lacking of blinking as she stares at your clone, and in that moment she feels like this is the closest she’ll ever fucking get to the real thing.
Dina notices immediately, and she smirks gently. She’s just as drunk as Ellie, and her better judgment has flown out the window far too long ago, so she doesn’t stop herself when she leans into Ellie again towards the end of the set and whispers to her.
“I dare you to try and get it in with her”
Ellie truly didn’t need to be told twice, because adrenaline was already pumping through her veins and she was fucking horny, and she seriously had nothing to lose at this point.
Or so she thought.
She smirked softly as she eyed the lead singer, downing the rest of what was in her glass and passing it to Dina.
The bands set had ended a few minutes after that, and the little smirk that the lead singer gave Ellie, followed by the silent calling with her fingers when she walked off was all she needed to carry out the dare that she was given.
The bar was small, with little security, so it was fairly easy to navigate her way to the backstage area. She made her way out of the bar, the warm breeze wafting onto her face as she circled around the bar so that she was at the back of it.
And as if they shared a brain, there she was. She looked even more like you in the moonlight, and it made Ellie’s heart beat faster. Her back was pressed up against the brick wall of the bar as she brought her cigarette to her lips, smirking the second she saw Ellie making her way over to her.
“Didn’t think you’d come…” She purred out, trying desperately to sound sexy. If Ellie wasn’t so gone, the attempt would’ve made her cringe. But the alcohol and weed in her system made it so that she even sounded like you, so she took it.
Ellie smirked softly, leaning against the wall as she stood next to the girl, her bottom lip pulled between her teeth as her eyes shamelessly roamed down her body. “With that little show you were putting on for me? I’d be crazy not to come…” she sighed out, her voice raspy.
The girl giggled softly, her cheeks turning pink as she turned her body so that she was facing Ellie before she nodded her head towards the building. “Wanna see my dressing room?” 
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
Ellie had the girl pressed up against the dark walls of the dressing room, if she could even call it that. It was a small room with a couch against the wall, a make shift vanity and a tiny rack with a few hangers on it, but Ellie didn’t care.
Because in her drunken state, a pair of soft lips and a warm body pressed up against hers was just what she needed. The little moans and whines that came from the girl were urging her on, and it was finally giving her the distraction from you that she needed so badly.
“Fuck…you taste so good..” she moaned out. Ellie knew she was lying, she tasted of weed and whiskey and her kisses were harsh. It made Ellie wonder how many times she’d told someone these things before.
Ellie groaned, gripping the girls waist and walking backwards until they had reached the couch. The girl pressed her palms against Ellie’s chest, pushing her back to lay on the couch as she straddled her.
Without missing another beat, her lips were on Ellie’s again. Ellie placed her large hands on her hips as she began rocking her back and forth, letting her grind down on her body. The moans that she let out were sinful and Ellie wanted more, she needed to hear more.
When the girl broke the kiss, she expected her to take her top off, or stand up to take her skirt off, or anything other than what she actually did.
She was straddling Ellie, and Ellie moaned out softly as she let her hand trail up her body, grabbing and squeezing as she waited for her to do something else. The girl opened her mouth and she began speaking, but Ellie couldn’t understand what she was saying.
Her words sounded like they were in a different language, one Ellie couldn’t quite pinpoint, and it made her furrow her eyebrows in confusion. She sat up a bit, proving herself up on her elbows as she stared up at the girl. “What…what are you doing?” She mumbled out, but she was only met with a hand pressed to her chest and pushing her back down to lay on the couch.
The girl continued speaking, reaching behind her and grabbing a small dagger, and Ellie’s heart began beating faster and faster.
The girl got louder with each passing word she spoke, and Ellie was starting to think for a moment that this was all a bad dream and she’d wake up soon.
But she never did.
The girl inhaled deeply, holding the handle of the dagger with both hands before she lifted it over her head, biting her lip almost nervously as she stared down at Ellie.
“We won’t make it on our own in Hollywood…you’re our ticket there…sorry” she mumbled softly, and Ellie’s eyes went wide.
“Are you fucking crazy!? What are you-“ her words were cut off by the dagger piercing her through her chest.
She doesn’t remember anything after that.
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
That night was the last normal night of Ellie’s life.
Because after all of that, she woke up gasping for air in the woods. She had no idea where the fuck she was or how long she had been there, but she did know that whoever the hell put here there, thought that she was dead.
When she got up, she had the worst headache of her entire fucking life. The throbbing was so loud, she was sure if anyone was standing next to her they’d be able to hear it too. And she was so fucking hungry. She placed a hand on her stomach to try and calm the pain she felt, but it didn’t help.
She felt empty, drained, like all of the life had been sucked from her body, and she was merely a corpse left to rot in the woods.
Corpse…death…dying.
That girl tried to fucking kill her.
It was all coming back to her, but when she looked down at the area of where the girl had stabbed her, it was completely gone.
And Ellie was sure she was having a bad fucking trip at that point.
All she knew, was that she needed to get home and fucking eat something.
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
It was like she was suffering the worst hangover of her entire life.
No matter how much she ate, she couldn’t shake the empty feeling that settled at the pit of her stomach. She tried everything, cleaning out her fridge, her pantry, she even splurged and bought food from her favorite fucking take out place.
And nothing.
She felt like she was going to pass out every time she stood up. She was weak, and frail, and there wasn’t enough medicine to get rid of the pain that riddled her entire body.
And to make things worse, she couldn’t stop thinking about you.
She always did, you were almost always on her mind, but this was all different.
The hunger she felt in her stomach was almost identical to the hunger she felt for you. It was like she couldn’t separate lust and basic human needs, and she felt like she was going to lose her mind if she wasn’t able to touch you soon.
But she couldn’t, not in this state. She had to wait to see you.
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
Ellie learned a lot within the week that she took off of school.
She learned that food wasn’t enough. After about the third day of trying to satisfy herself with the second set of groceries she went through, she was convinced that food just was not going to cut it.
Then what the hell would?
Her answer came to her when she was at the store, trying to buy more medicine for her everlasting headache.
The fluorescent lights in the pharmacy were making her dizzy, everything around her just entirely too loud, and it was making her angry.
But for a moment, it was all clear.
The girl standing next to Ellie was so unsuspecting, bending down a bit to find whatever medicine it was that she needed, living her life just as everyone else was doing in the store.
But Ellie couldn’t ignore the way that her mind was clear, and for a split second, her headache was gone and the hunger she felt subsided.
Until it all came rushing back again once she stepped away.
She wasn’t sure what it was that ignited her to follow the girl, or what it was that was even prompting her to continue doing so outside of the store. But before she knew it, her new instincts were taking over and she was pouncing the girl outside of her car in the dim parking lot.
So yeah, Ellie finally figured out what it was that she needed to satisfy her hunger.
Because after she finished the girl, she felt stronger, like she had been born again. Any pain and suffering that she was experiencing had disappeared the second her teeth sunk into the girls skin. It was like euphoria, and she wanted more.
That week was spent entirely by herself. Researching and trying to understand what the hell had happened to her. She figured she wasn’t a vampire, because she’d watch those twilight movies with you and she was pretty damn sure she wouldn’t turn into stone if someone killed her, and she was breathing and walking around just as much as any other living person so she wasn’t necessarily dead.
But she was stronger, radiant, she was sure her skin even had a new fucking glow to it that wasn’t there before. So something had changed.
After digging through countless libraries, she finally found a book on spells and rituals. That’s how she settled on the fact that she indeed was used as a sacrifice.
A fame spell to be exact. Ellie couldn’t decipher what spell it was exactly that had been used on her, but from what was physically done, and the final words that the girl spoke to her, she narrowed it down to that.
Dealing with…her new way of life was..strange.
Because her strength would last for a few days after she…ate, and she would feel like she was on top of the world. But then, she’d crash.
After reading further, she figured out that she had to feed every other day now. She tried her best to put it off as much as she possibly could, but Jesus was it hard.
The books she had about the spells and rituals also told her, that her hunger could only be satisfied when in the presence of her true love, and that made Ellie’s cold, dead her skip a beat.
Because she knew it was you, and she knew that she needed a lot of time before she could face you again. The hunger for you was still there, no matter how much she fed on others, she only wanted to be with you, and that scared her.
Ellie wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she ever hurt you.
And that’s why she waited so long to see you, wanting to be at her strongest before she was setting foot in your home and into your embrace. She told herself she could do it, that it would all be easy.
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
She was wrong.
Because come Monday and you’re sitting in the courtyard, the sun dancing on your pretty skin, soaking it up beautiful, your skirt flowing in the wind, and Ellie just wants to whisk you away and keep you in her bed until the end of time.
But she gets closer and she notices that you’re sitting with Amber.
It was stupid enough that Ellie had gone too many days without feeding, and she was already irritated to begin with, but now you were sitting there looking like a fucking goddess and it wasn’t for her, you weren’t waiting for her and it made her want to rip someone’s fucking throat to shreds.
Ellie finds that she can’t really control herself or her actions these days, especially when it’s been a while since she’s gone…hunting..it’s like she’s suddenly seeing red at any minor inconvenience and she’s too weak to even care about the white hot rage that’s surging through her body.
And that’s how you end up crying in front of her in the library, and Ellie feels like fucking shit about it.
Once her head is clear and she isn’t tucking starving, shes texting you and she’s trying to apologize but it’s all left in vain, because she’s sure at this point you’ve either muted her messages or gone all out and blocked her, and it’s making her want to cry because don’t you know that you’re all she fucking wants? Can’t you see how she feels about you? She’s suffering without you and it seems like you don’t even fucking care.
Ellie finds herself getting upset again, and the worst part is, is that you aren’t even there to defend yourself.
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
It had been a few days since the party, and Ellie was once again suffering.
You’d gone completely silent after it all. You gently pushed her off of your body, put your clothes on and walked out of the room to go home.
Ellie had sat there with a confused look on her face, scurrying around to grab her own clothes as she kept trying to talk to you, see what was going through your head, anything.
But you said nothing, you simply got dressed and left, and it left Ellie panicking.
Because she felt as though she just got you back, and she finally felt okay with herself and with you when she was around you, kissing you and holding you. But you were slipping through her fingers just as quickly as you were falling into bed with her, and she didn’t know what to do.
So, she gave you space.
She ignored any impulse that she had to text you, to show up at your apartment with your favorite flowers and a stuffed animal of the stupid cartoon you like, but it was fucking hard, and she couldn’t help but feel like this was the end between the two of you.
She started taking things a lot more serious when you didn’t show up to school.
Never in all of your friendship did you let anything make you miss school. Even when you were 11 and Ellie gave you strep and you almost passed out during gym class, or when you refused to miss a final even after a dentist appointment and you were all loopy on laughing gas, to this day Ellie doesn’t know how you passed a test in that state.
But bottom line was, you never let anything get in the way of your education. So Ellie was really fucking worried when her first lecture of the day was going on and all she could focus on was your empty seat that was next to her.
After class, she had raced to your apartment. She had given you more than enough time to figure out what you wanted from her, and she decided it was time you let her know.
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
Her hand was banging on your door, the same exact way it was the first time she revealed herself to you after she had…changed.
She knew she had to be persistent, she knew that the sudden silence from you was only going to grow more space between the two of you if she didn’t do something about it.
So she stood there for about ten minutes, knocking on your door and calling out for you until you’d decide to call the cops, or open up for her.
“Baby come on…we…fuck, we need to talk. Either you let me in or I’m letting myself in” her tone was stern, and from the other side of it you stood there, staring at it, and you knew you should take her seriously.
Ellie almost passed out when she catches sight of you, and it feels like she hasn’t seen you in years. Your eyes are puffy, and your lips are swollen from all the times you’d rub your sweater sleeve against your nose, and as sick and twisted as it may sound.
Ellie thinks you look so fucking pretty.
But she can’t ignore the way her heart tugs at the tiny sniffle you let out. You’re standing in front of her, and you have that cute little pout on your lips, and your arms are wrapped around yourself like you’re protecting yourself from her and she feels like she’ll break at any second because this is her doing, she’s the reason you’re like this.
She let out a soft sigh and she’s pushing the door closed before she’s pulling you down to sit on the couch to sit with her. She winces slightly because you still won’t look at her, and she feels like she’s already lost you.
Her voice falls lower, just above a whisper as she brings her hand up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Bambi…you’ve gotta talk to me…we…we can’t just…do what we did and not talk about it”
She feels like the worst person in the world because the second she speaks, she can already see your chin wobbling and she hears the way your breathing becomes uneven and she knows it’s coming, and she wishes she can do something to stop it.
When you finally look up at her, your eyes are red, eyelashes clumping together from your wet tears and it looks like you’ll crumble at any second.
“You’ve changed Ellie…you’re not the same and I…I want my best friend back”
Your words hit her deep within her chest, like the dagger the girl at the bar drove through her, but worse. Because you’re pleading with her for something she can’t give you, and it’s the first time in her life and in your friendship that she feels like she can’t provide you with everything you’ll ever need.
She inhales deeply, her hands dropping to take yours in her own before she gives a slight nod. “I have changed…and I…I’m not sure if I can go back to the way I was before baby..” her voice is low, and her words make you scoff.
“Typical, you’re just dancing around my words at this point Ellie. What is going on with you? What are you not telling me?” You whimper out, your voice breaking between the sobs and tears you’re holding back for your own sake, and her own.
She sighs, because she knows she can’t keep this up anymore.
With a deep inhale, she give your hand a squeeze, and she’s telling you everything she’s experienced within the past few weeks.
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
You’re slowly pulling your hands away from hers when she finishes, eyebrows furrowed as you stare at her as if she had three heads.
“Is this a fucking joke?”
Ellie felt like she was going to cry, and you were staring at her with furrowed eyebrows, looking so fucking angry. For the first time since all of this had happened, she realized that everything she was telling you probably sounded like a load of bullshit.
“Look, I know it’s hard to believe and…and I know you probably don’t trust me all that much right now. But I don’t even fully understand it all myself I just…” she stuttered out, feeling more and more hopeless the longer you stared at her with that dumbfounded look on your face.
Your best friend was sat in front of you, telling you that within the past two and a half weeks, she had someone been used in some…fame ritual, and because it went wrong, she was now some…some monster.
You let out a tired sigh, you were over it, all of it. You didn’t know what to think or what to feel, and in all honesty, you felt like the stories that Ellie were feeding you were all a sorry excuse to get rid of you.
“Look Ellie, I’m not an idiot…okay? And I’m not a child..if you…if you don’t wanna be friends anymore you can just say that. You don’t have to make up some elaborate story to try and soften the blow” you sighed out, your voice barely above a whisper. You slowly got up, letting her hands fall from your lap as you made your way to your bedroom, leaving her behind.
Ellie panicked, the tone in your voice told her that you were tired, and you were over her. The fact alone that you thought she could ever end your friendship made her heart tug.
The only reason she’d ever do that, is if she ever grew the balls to tell you how much she loved you.
She quickly got up from the couch and followed you into your bedroom. You were laying there, cuddling with Angel as you turned on your TV, acting as if Ellie wasn’t even there.
Ellie frowned, crawling onto your bed grabbing your thigh gently so she could spread your legs, settling between them as she stared into your eyes desperately.
“Im not lying! I wish I was fucking lying but I promise you I’m not” she groaned, grabbing your hand and holding it against her chest. “What can I do to prove it to you?” She mumbled out, staring into your sad eyes.
Angel caught her attention, and she noticed the way the cat that was curled into your side stared at her, eyes slanted and hair puffed up.
And it gave her an idea.
Her eyes widened a bit before she pointed at the cat. “Angel! She used to love me, and now she won’t even step near me. Don’t you think that means something?” She pleaded.
You frowned softly as you looked down at your cat, realizing then just how strange she had been acting.
Angel loved Ellie, she actually went with you to the adoption center to get her when she was just a baby. She crawled towards the both of you, meowing happily the second Ellie brought her hand down to pet her, and you knew that she was the one you’d take home with you.
Even when Ellie would visit, she’d be eager to jump into the girls lap.
But that had all gone through the window, and you started to think about when she started acting this way, but you were only left with the night that Ellie had came to you after her disappearance.
You blinked a few times in thought as you stared at your spooked cat before you shook your head, looking back up at Ellie.
“That doesn’t prove anything, she could just be…going through a phase or something” you shrugged, and Ellie was letting out a frustrated groan.
She looked down at her body, trying to find anything that she could physically show you that would prove to you that she wasn’t lying, and that this was all the truth.
Then she remembered. Her fucking fangs.
They freaked her out when she first realized she had them, and the sort of weighed in on the whole vampire theory that she had at first, but she remembered that she had them.
And that was all the proof she could give, so it had to be enough.
She inhaled deeply, staring down at you before she rested a hand on your soft thigh. “I’m going to show you something, but I need you to know that I’m not going to hurt you, and you don’t need to be afraid of me…okay?” She nodded slowly, trying to get you to understand that she was serious with what she was.
You furrowed your eyebrows as you stared up at her from your spot against your plush pillows, rolling your eyes as you shook your head. “Ellie I don’t have time for this, and really tired. Maybe you should just-“ she quickly cut you off.
“You know my better than anyone else does…please…just give me five minutes” she begged, her big green eyes staring into yours.
Your heart skipped a bit as she stared down at you, and you felt like you had no choice but to hear her out. You inhaled deeply before you gave her a gentle nod, urging her to carry on with what it was she had to show you.
She nodded with you, sighing gently before she closed her eyes, and focused. She had only tried pushing them out on her own once, the times before that her body simply took over and did it for her. She found that she had to make her mind completely blank, only focusing on bringing the new set of teeth that she had down.
Soon enough, her gums began to feel sore, and she felt her teeth shift a bit as the sharp fangs pushed out and settled where her canines would be. Once she was sure they were down completely, she opened her mouth for you to see.
Your eyes widened as you stared at her, sitting up a bit to get a closer look. The memories of her on top of you came flooding in, and what you wrote off to be a drunken hallucination was sitting right in front of your sober eyes.
Ellie Williams had fucking fangs.
You couldn’t stop yourself from crawling closer to her, settling on your knees as you reached out and grasped her chin gently, a soft gasp leaving your lips as you stared into your friends mouth.
“They were real…” you whispered out, more so to yourself than to her. Ellie furrowed her eyebrows in confusion at your words, letting you stare into her mouth for a moment longer before she grabbed your wrist and closed her mouth. “Wait, you saw them?”
You nodded slowly as you stared at her. “At the party..when you…when we finished…I saw them. But I just…assumed I was just seeing things because of how drunk I was” you mumbled out softly before you licked your lips, staring down at her hand wrapped around your wrist.
“Okay fine…so what if you are telling the truth. What does this all even mean? What are you trying to tell me?” You sighed out, your voice soft and tired.
Ellie sighed, her thumb rubbing your soft skin gently before she shrugged. “I’m not totally sure what it means…but I do know that I feel…I feel better when I’m with you…I feel normal, like I don’t even need to do any of that stuff to feel okay…” she sighed out, staring up at you. Her green eyes sparkled against the dark light in your room, and the sight alone had you in shambles.
She sighed out gently, her hands cautiously going to hold your waist gently before she continued on.
“I’m tired of pretending..I know I’m different now but I…..I…” she stuttered, her heart beating a mile a minute. She was scared, scared that she’d lose you forever.
But it was worth the fucking risk.
“I’m in love with you.” She confessed, her voice low as she stared up at you, hands massaging your waist gently as you stared down at her.
And you realized there were two things you had thought you imagined, but were real.
One, your best friend had fangs.
Two, she told you she was in love with you.
You froze, because you didn’t know what to say. In all the years of knowing her, you’d dream about being with her in this very moment, wishing she’d utter those words to you every night before you went to sleep.
But now that you were here, you didn’t know what to say.
Ellie continued massaging your skin, giving you as much time as you needed to respond to her. When a few seconds passed and you were still silent, she continue giving your waist small, reassuring squeezes.
“Don’t worry if you don’t feel the same way Bambi, we can still be friends-“ she was cut off by your lips pressed against hers.
Ellie groans softly, her eyes fluttering shut at the feeling. She has yearned for it the moment you broke apart the last time she was with you, and having you there with her, pressed up against her, it was like having her air fill up with lungs again.
You moved to straddle her lap, your tongue pushing into her mouth in a passionate kiss as you wrapped your arms around her neck and held her close to your body.
Ellie feels the best when she’s pressed up against you, but you haven’t said a word since she’s confessed, and she can’t let this carry on if you don’t feel the same way.
It takes everything in her to pull away from you, and the little whine you let out when she breaks the kiss doesn’t make it any easier, but she’s pulling you away by your waist and she’s staring up at you, trying to catch her breath.
“Baby…baby wait I…I can’t…I can’t keep going if you don’t feel the same way..” she breaths out, and she thinks you’re going to come to your senses and tell her to go home, that you were done with her nonsense
But you’re not, your smiling softly down at her and she swears she can see the hearts floating around in your eyes. They’re twinkling and glowing and they look like pools of love and you honestly don’t even have to say it back, but she’s desperate to hear those words fall from your lips.
“You’re such an idiot…of course I love you too Els…always have…” you whispered out, toying with the soft ends of her hair at the nape of her neck.
You hum softly, one of your hands coming from around her and tracing her features, dancing over her freckles as if they were tiny constellations, there just for your viewing and no one else.
“I…we need to talk more about…what happened to you…but I believe you” you nodded, affirming to her that you truly did believe her.
And she feels her heart beating out of her chest, because not only do you believe her, but you loved her, and she feels like it’s all she needs to keep her going for the rest of her days.
She’s nodding eagerly, pulling you closer as she agrees. “Anything, I’ll tell you anything you want. I promise” her words were genuine, and you’re smiling softly as you stare down at her, feeling so comfortable and at peace in her lap, with her arms wrapped around you, you can’t even think for another minute that the story she’s telling you is far fetched.
You nod with her before leaning in and pressing a kiss to the corner of her lips. “Before we do that…I’ve missed you, Ellie..” you sigh out against her ear, and she feels a chill run up her spine. Her hands are roaming your body in an instant and she’s nodding eagerly, almost looking silly as she gently lays you down into your bed.
“Fuck…please…let me show you how much I love you baby…come here…” she moaned out, already far too eager to touch you, feel you, love you.
You whine softly underneath her, staring up into her eyes lovingly before she leans down, catching your lips against hers in a loving kiss. Her hands are traveling up your body, slipping under your shirt and cupping your boob, twisting your nipple between her calloused fingers, and it’s pathetic but you’re already a moaning mess.
Her other hand comes up to grab both of your wrists, pinning them above your head. She breaks the kiss, staring down at you and moaning softly, she sounds so pretty you think you could cry. Your last memory with her like this was so fuzzy, and rough and hard to see through.
But this is all crystal clear, and it’s making your heart burst with love. The way she’s staring down at your body as she pushes your sleep shirt up to get a good look at you is so intense it almost makes you shy away, but this is Ellie, your Ellie, and you don’t trust anyone as much as you trust her.
Ellie bit her lip softly as she stares down at you for a moment longer before she’s helping you sit up, tearing off both your clothes and her clothes and tossing them in different directions of your room until your both naked and pressed up against one another.
You feel something press up against your soaked core and you furrow your eyebrows as you look down, only to see Ellie’s pink strap pushing against you. You look up at her, opening your mouth to ask her about it before she’s cutting you off with an answer.
“I…was hoping I’d be able to make love to you tonight…wore it just in case you didn’t kick me out…” she mumbles out sheepishly. And once again, your heart is bursting with love with her because she’s such an idiot sometimes, but it’s okay because she’s your idiot.
You pull her closer, pressing your lips to hers before your hand is trailing down between you and you grab the base, pushing it towards your soaked entrance with a soft hum.
“Shut up and fuck me already..” you moan out, and she doesn’t need to be told twice.
She pushes into you, and the moan you let out is enough to have her moaning with you. Her tattooed hand comes down to grip your hip gently as she steadies herself before she falls into a slow rhythm, moaning at the way her strap is rubbing up against her clit, and at the way that you’re moaning beneath her.
“F-fuck! Ahhhh Ellieeee…mmm-oh my god!” You whine out, and she’s nodding her head to urge you on further, her own words cut off by her moans and hissing.
“That’s it…that’s my fucking girl…o-oh fuck! My good girl…god I love you…fuck” she’s just as much of a mess as you are, and she’s positive she won’t last long. You’re staring up at her with those big heart eyes and she knows she’s a goner.
Because this is what she’s always wanted, to make you hers, show you how much she loves you and that you were it for her, you were her endgame, forever and always.
Her eyes are hungry and they’re eating you up, because you look like a work of art to her right now and she doesn’t even want to blink in fear that she’ll miss a fucking second of you.
“Love you so much…mmm fuuuuckk…gonna cum Els..please…please make me cum” you’re begging her, and it’s making her moans grow louder, the two of you babbling incoherently as you both confess your undying love for one another.
Ellie nods, speeding up her pace. “That’s it baby, such a good girl for me- fuck! I’m gonna fucking come. Oh my god I’m-“ she moans out, and just from the look of her throwing her head back, her fucking fangs on full display for you, looking like the prettiest goddamn demon you’ve ever seen, you cum with her.
There’s little sparkles dancing around you, at least that’s what it feels like. Ellie tossed her strap to the side once you both caught your breath and cleaned you both up, and she put you in your favorite sleep shirt, and a pair of spare boxers you had for her laying around, and you both simply lay there, holding each other in your dim room.
And it feels complete, because it’s the first time that you can actually feel her there with you, and not just pretending to be there. And Ellie feels it too, she feels satisfied and she feels like she’s normal again, even though she knows she’s not.
A few moments pass as you’re pressed up against her, your fingers tracing small shapes on her collar bone before you break the silence.
“So…are we talking like…resident evil vampires? Or…Edward Cullen vampire?” And your words makes her chuckle softly before she sighs, finally giving it some thought for a moment before she hum.
“We’ll find out together baby…”
#ellie williams#ellie williams smut#ellie williams x female reader#ellie williams x y/n#ellie williams x you#tlou part 2#ellie x y/n#ellie tlou#ellie x fem reader#ellie the last of us
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Aziraphale hate makes my brain hurt.
Like let's be really fuckin' for real here.
Neurodivergent fans have repeatedly said that Aziraphale is autistic coded. I agree with them. I have never been diagnosed but I wonder about myself. If only I could get a doctor to take me seriously enough to test me for it, but alas, I'm a 43-year-old woman living in the good ole US of A.
Those with religious trauma have repeatedly said that they identify with him as well. I'm one of those people. I endured 12 years of Catholic schools and just as much time being taught a very black and white view of things that I've had to spend more than 20 goddamn fucking years working to unlearn.
I find that my views as a survivor of religious abuse are often dismissed because people keep wanting to say "Aziraphale doesn't have religious trauma." Yes, thank you, I get that, but unless you've been indoctrinated and brainwashed into a very black and white view of the world, you probably don't understand the kind of feelings Aziraphale's onscreen experiences evoke in so many of us. Heaven might not be real, but the feelings of "God is always watching" still stick with me today even though I no longer believe in God. I have entirely denounced Christianity because of my own personal experience, and I refuse to allow people to try and guilt me or shame me for trauma that I didn't ask for. I wasn't given a choice.
As a child I was told that God was real and always watching everything you do (just like Santa Claus) and can hear everything you say and knows everything you are thinking. Do you know what I learned to do in order to cope with this overwhelming and anxiety-inducing information as a small child? I learned to censor my thoughts. I never spoke up, and I have always felt like I was putting on a show for people because I had to be who I was told to be or I would get into trouble.
Aziraphale said "poverty is a virtue" during The Resurrectionists, and as someone who grew up in the Bible belt and went to private schools, I was taught this very same shit by the Catholic church. He learned in that very same episode that "poverty is a virtue" is actually a tool of oppression to keep the poor poor and the wealthy wealthy. I know we all watched the episode. He went into that episode believing what he said, but by the end of it he knew it was actually utter bullshit. Aziraphale is not ignorant. He's highly intelligent, and he has never been too proud to admit when he has been wrong. He accepts that the information he learned before is not matching up with reality.
And it's so obvious some of you have zero experience with that type of indoctrination because of how very little empathy you show Aziraphale for his "mistake" of "choosing Heaven over Crowley" and "making Crowley sad" so clearly Aziraphale must somehow be "abusive" and "manipulative" and "selfish" and "self-centered" because he didn't choose to run away with Crowley at the end of season two.
First of all.
FIRST OF ALL...
Aziraphale has a mind of his own.
Aziraphale is always going to try and do what is right.
Aziraphale is an angel. He's a being of love. And the reason he's so "bad" at being an angel is because he actually wants to protect humanity. He has always loved humanity. He repeatedly has to contend with what is "right" versus what is "good" and "wrong" versus "evil". Yeah, he has flaws. He's an angel, not a goddamn fucking saint. He has lived on Earth for more than 6,000 years. He has seen everything. He loves doing human things.
He's obsessed with magic. It makes him so happy. He's not very good at it...well not when he's trying to put on a show for Crowley.
He chose to learn French the hard way, so even though he knows every single language in the world, he chooses to be mediocre at French. Something that annoys and amuses Crowley at the same time.
He loves to dance even though angels aren't supposed to dance, and dancing with Crowley was what he wanted the most.
He owns a bookshop and refuses to sell any of his books because they are books he's had for as long as there have been books. He will chase customers away from his collection, and Crowley understands how much they mean to Aziraphale because he refuses to sell any when Aziraphale leaves him in charge.
He and Crowley have been speaking to each other in coded language for more than 6,000 years. They have to be very careful about what they say because Heaven and Hell are always watching.
Heaven has photographs of Crowley and Aziraphale sitting or standing together throughout history. Hell had one photo of Crowley and Aziraphale actually working together and it was Aziraphale's quick thinking and how good he actually is at sleight of hand tricks that managed to get that photo out of Furfur's hands so he wouldn't be able to turn Crowley over to the Dark Council.
Aziraphale saved Crowley from being taken to Hell again. He wasn't able to save Crowley from Hell in Edinburgh, but he sure as heck managed to save Crowley from Hell during WWII. He took Crowley to his bookshop and showed Crowley that he stole the picture from Furfur. He saved Crowley.
You get that, right?
Aziraphale SAVED Crowley.
People always talk about how it's "always Crowley saving Aziraphale" because apparently heroic acts are only heroic when they are grand gestures. The sleight of hand wasn't heroic at all, am I right? It wasn't sparkly and showy. It wasn't interesting enough, therefore not heroic. At least that's all I'm hearing when people start with their "blah Aziraphale deserves to suffer because I have no imagination or ability to understand the media in front of me blah", and all these reasons he deserves to suffer is because Crowley almost got hurt.
Aziraphale did that without flinching and I watch that part closely every single time. He's not scared for himself. He's scared for Crowley, and he managed to hold onto that photograph. He did not fail Crowley. He protected Crowley.
And so here's another thing that we like to point out. The way that Aziraphale, an angel who is effeminate and male presenting, an angel who is soft and full of love, an angel who is kind and forgiving because he has empathy and compassion, is somehow painted as abusive and manipulative. He's not violent, but he could easily fuck up your world. He doesn't use his powers. We have no idea how powerful he is because we only ever see him do small acts. He's used to hiding. It's the only way he has ever been able to protect Crowley.
And I'm not saying that Aziraphale has actually saved Crowley before means that Crowley hasn't also saved Aziraphale. Like, you get that those are not mutually exclusive and their relationship is not transactional, right? They have spent their entire existence protecting each other but never actually getting to be together because Heaven and Hell are always watching.
Yeah, Crowley fell. We all know this. We are aware of this. He was the serpent of Eden. He gave humanity the knowledge of free will.
But what we don't talk about is what Aziraphale gave humanity.
What did he give them?
We all know what it is!
Let's say it together!
He gave Adam and Eve his flaming sword because it was dangerous outside the garden and Eve was pregnant and she was already having a really bad day. He showed them compassion and gave them his extremely powerful angelic weapon so they would stand a chance on the outside of the garden. He gave humanity the gift of compassion. It's just unfortunate that his flaming sword became a weapon of War.
And then what did he do after that?
Ooooh, yeah, that's right.
God asked him about it and he straight up lied to her and pretended he had no idea where he'd managed to misplace it. She didn't say anything after that. He told Crowley the truth though. He told Crowley the truth even though Crowley fell.
Yeah, we know Aziraphale has done some really fucking questionable things. He and Crowley both suck at passing for human in front of observant people like Nina. They're not human. They are still learning, but they managed to experience human history together despite being on opposite sides and their experiences with humanity are what has shaped them into the compassionate and loving duo they are now. One of them is not better from the other.
This, my friends, is what we call meeting in the middle. It's why shades of gray is so important. Aziraphale constantly breaks the rules. Crowley refused to play by Heaven's rules. It's the reason he fell. He doesn't play by Hell's rules either. These two dorks figured out how to cancel each others' miracles out throughout human history in order to have more time learning about humanity and each other because working all day every day sucks when there are so many new things to learn and experience with the people you love.
We know Crowley and Aziraphale both love each other. Neither of them are good at hiding the hearts stars in their eyes.
But here's what's really fucking annoying about the Aziraphale hate.
Aziraphale was already crying when Crowley grabbed him and kissed him. Aziraphale is trying so very hard to do the right thing. He loves Crowley. He does. But he also has a duty to humanity, and he has taken that job very seriously since the creation of Adam and Eve. He sent them out into the world with a flaming sword so they would have a chance at surviving beyond the walls of the garden.
And he knows that Something Terrible is going to happen and he spent all of second season trying to figure out what that Something Terrible was while trying to have some sort of more honest and open relationship with Crowley, but again, they aren't human, they are a demon and an angel approaching life from opposite sides who met in the middle and fell in love with humanity together.
He wants more than anything to tell Crowley how he feels about him, but he wants to do something grand for Crowley because Crowley has always been grand and dramatic and sexy and a little bit scary.
Crowley is impulsive and has a temper and sometimes says the wrong thing but he has always trusted Aziraphale because Aziraphale gave him a chance even after he fell. Aziraphale chose to shelter him instead of smiting him while they stood on top of that wall. He knew he was supposed to kill Crowley, but oops, he gave his sword away to the humans so he didn't really have anything to kill him with and Crowley is the one who created nebulas. The Pillars of Creation is Crowley's work and Aziraphale was there to witness that, but he watched Crowley more than he watched the nebula. He witnessed the pure joy on Crowley's face when he said "let there be light" as a nebula full of colors exploded before their eyes. He was fascinated by Crowley.
But Aziraphale is going back to Heaven even though he has made it perfectly clear he absolutely has no desire to go back to Heaven. He told the Metatron this during their conversation. He spoke these words out loud. They exist.
But then The Metatron said this....
The Metatron. The very same angel who told Aziraphale in season one "to speak to me is to speak to the Almighty." He's the boss. He's the big guy. He's used to existing as a giant head and he had to give himself a body so he wouldn't stand out on Earth. And he knows that Aziraphale and Crowley have been working together since the beginning. He knows they worked together to prevent Armageddon in season one, and now he's made it clear he knows they were working together long before that. And let's face it, Aziraphale really wants to know what this Something Terrible is that Gabriel is running from so he can try to prevent it from happening.
It makes sense that he would want to take Crowley to Heaven with him because he would be able to keep Hell from getting their hands on him again. Aziraphale hates it in Heaven. He doesn't want to go, but Something Terrible is happening and Metatron isn't taking no for an answer, and maybe Heaven won't be so bad if Crowley is there with him. At least they can fix Heaven together.
But Crowley can't go back. We all get that. We don't blame him for saying no. It doesn't change anything.
Something Terrible is about to happen and Aziraphale has to figure out what it is. He wants to change Heaven.
He is fully aware that Heaven sucks. He still has faith in God. His faith isn't in Heaven. He deserted his platoon in season one and threw himself back to Earth so he could figure out how to make sure the war between Heaven and Hell doesn't happen.
But see, here's the thing. Heaven is at the top. Heaven has all the resources. Heaven is responsible for the creation of Hell. Heaven is empty and Hell is overpopulated. Aziraphale knows this. Crowley knows this. It's obvious every time we see either place. Both sides are desperate to go to war and will not hesitate to destroy humanity in the process. This is the opposite of what Crowley and Aziraphale want for humanity. If anyone can change Heaven, it's Aziraphale. He's the only one up there who gives a shit about humanity as far as we know. No one else is going to speak on humanity's behalf.
Some of us are so busy getting mad at Aziraphale for going back to Heaven and giving Crowley a Big Sad. Newsflash: Crowley is not the main character of Good Omens. Aziraphale and Crowley are equals, yet we wanna hold Aziraphale to higher standards because he's an angel, and when he makes mistakes it's proof that he's the bad guy.
Holy mother of all things that trigger my religious trauma, let me tell you. I spent my entire life hating myself every time I made mistakes. I've had to teach myself that just because I mess up sometimes doesn't mean I'm bad. It means I'm human. I still struggle with it. I probably always will. So when you say that Aziraphale deserves to be punished for breaking Crowley's heart, you not only ignore that Aziraphale's heart is also broken, you're saying he deserves to be punished for doing what he thinks is right.
Wanting to change Heaven for the better is not a bad thing.
And some of y'all wanna see him suffer for going back into the lion's den that is Heaven, knowing that he is already an outcast, that they have already tried to kill him once, knowing that he is a deserter, that he has been lying to Heaven about a lot of things, and you still think he's blinded by Heaven? You think he's just so naive and that's the only reason he's going back. He doesn't show his emotions the same way Crowley does so it means he doesn't care as much. He's expected to consider Crowley's feelings over his own when making choices. Like holy shit if all of that hasn't defined my experience as a woman with religious trauma in this fucking society. He's expected to be subservient to Crowley and if he doesn't do what Crowley wants then he's being unreasonable and illogical.
What the actual fuck, y'all.
Like seriously.
I'm sick of this bullshit. I had to step away from this fandom because of how toxic some people in this fandom are. It's not chasing me away, but the fact that I chose to hang out in a a more toxic fandom that is already notorious for being really toxic over a fandom that claims to be more open-minded and welcoming should probably tell you something.
It gave me a lot of perspective, and yeah, I'm still gonna speak up against the bullshit Aziraphale hate.
People are entitled to their opinions, but the Aziraphale hate isn't an opinion. It's just ableist, misogynistic garbage. At this point we all know y'all say these extreme things about Aziraphale because y'all get more joy out of the harm and alienation it is causing others.
Keep being loudly wrong, but if you think I'm not entitled to challenge shitty-ass, harmful, hateful discourse, bite my ass.
I'm not the one who lost the plot in this fandom.
#autistic coded character#religious trauma#good omens#aziraphale#aziraphale defense squad#i'm in a mood#like i'm begging y'all to learn what empathy is#like goddamn i know i'm not perfect but at least i don't forget that the reason for everything in good omens is love#neil has said this several times#it's one thing to dislike a character#it's another to assassinate characters in ways that blatantly contradict what the narrative has told us#and try to pass it off as canon#if you wanna send me hate just hit the block button instead#i'll try to be really sad about it#and if you just have to send me hatemail at least have the courage to attach it to your name instead of hiding behind anon#i'm too old for this shit#i'm gonna go back to the star wars tag now#it's been a minute since i went off and today proved to be the perfect day for it
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i posted this on twitter also but it’s still eating at me. i’m so fucking embarrassed to be jewish rn. i dont want to be associated with this ongoing bullshit from israel. why do we need our own state. theyre just making every jew across the globe look bad in general even though many of us are conflicted about zionism and the legitimacy of israel as a state
people have hated jews throughout history for no fuckin reason but now israel exists but now its like. GIVING people reasons to hate us as a group. note that i DON’T conflate zionism with jewishness, but a lot of people in the world don’t know the difference because theyre uninformed and been dripfed cultural antisemitic tropes their whole life and that’s the scary part is them falsely putting two and two together. like what the fuck israel stop youre just putting fuel on the fire for people around the world to hate an entire group of historically persecuted people if youre being this shitty with your insane colonialism and apartheid like……I Want No Fuckin Part Of This. you’re spelling our own doom. you cant just swoop in and go “mine now” and then oppress the people you took land from under a regime without my blood boiling at the injustice no matter WHO you are. even if my lineage is tied to you. so when news outlets support israel it doesn’t feel like they have the best interest of jews as a people in mind. it’s in the interest of a zionist ethnostate and whatever that christian zionism belief is about the jewish people returning to the holy land as prerequisite for the second coming of jesus. its not like they care about us as a dispersed ethnocultural group, it’s all for that religious narrative that a bunch of people in the US are backing.
saying you want all jews to die is antisemitic. beating someone up because they’re jewish and no other reason without knowing their views is antisemitic. criticizing human rights violations perpetrated by israel and the belief that one group deserves more rights another is not antisemitic. and the fact that israel has the ability to pull that antisemitism card in response to criticisms of the violations they commit because their state is the “jewish homeland” drives me fucking insane. take fucking accountability for your actions. and yes, there do exist full-on anti-jewish groups in the middle east that go beyond hatred of israel’s policies and existence as a state and i’m tired of people pretending there aren’t in fear of appearing to seem like they support the state of israel. on the other side of things many people overestimate this by fearmongering and saying EVERY arab is out to get jews worldwide, telling people like me “they want YOU dead”. this is not the belief every person in the middle east and it really rubs me the wrong way that people group millions of individuals into all-encompassing lumps like this. many people there do understand nuance of this political situation.
even if i have that “right of return” by israeli law or whatever, i don’t feel obliged to it; it does not register as fair. why do i have a “right of return” when i’ve never even been there in the first place while palestinians who have homes there can’t return to them? what’s the basis for that? substituting objective reality with an imaginary reality? i don’t think like that. i can hypothetically come and go whenever i please but palestinians are severely limited in mobility? what makes me more entitled to that land than the people who lived there for centuries? nothing that comes from natural law thats for sure. it’s all artificial and inflated.
but at the same time i also dont want to be the target of antisemitism and caught in the fray just for being ethnically jewish. once people start calling for the genocide of entire groups we’ve got issues (and you better believe this absolutely applies to the palestinian victims in gaza too), because people who dissent to the violence perpetrated by the loudest are caught in there with the people who are perpetrating the violence. lack of nuance. people conflating israel and its zionist apartheid policies with jewish ethnicity and culture worldwide. other people conflating being terrorist anti-jew with muslims worldwide (like that 6-year old palestinian-american boy that was just stabbed to death in chicago). scary times man. but as a jew i can’t just opt out of this if it’s how i was born as. i don’t have control over that. but i can control what i think and what my beliefs are
#israel palestine conflict#israel#palestine#what i feel is right most strongly resonates with secular humanist philosophy#never really found the right way to explain my worldview until i read about it
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"OH she's THAT GIRL! "
🏷 Your job is to exist in this world and get everything you wanted and make people wonder at your presence.
★ Hmm... Explain how you get everything you wanted in seconds?? How are you so perfect with no flaws??
Unreal
🌠 You look unreal with your flawless beauty! From top to bottom you are described as perfection!
🌠 Your manifestation skills are top-tier with easily adjustable mindset. You can LITERALLY SHIFT TO ANY REALITY
🌠 There is nothing in this world which is a "limit" to you. You do every shit at ease.
🌠 YOUR MANIFESTATION SKILLS, YOUR BEAUTY, YOUR GRADES, YOUR DREAM JOB, YOUR DREAM HOUSE, YOUR SP, YOUR PARENTS, YOUR REALITY, LITERALLY EVERYTHING WHAT YOU WANT HAS ALWAYS BEEN YOURSS!!
"Smile for me baby"
🌠 lemme tell ya that your smile is cute asf that you get everything what you want by just smiling !!?!??!
🌠 Your smile holds a special place in everyone's heart as the most precious thing in this whole entire world
🌠 JUST LIKE YOUR SMILE, YOUR PERSONALITY, YOUR SUCCESS, YOUR BEAUTY, ANY FUCKIN CAPACITIES YOU WISHED TO HAVE IS ALREADY YOURS AND IS ADORED BY EVERY SOUL AROUND YOU!
Happiness, love, spoiled nature
🌠 These three words may not be enough to explain your perfect soul but you are totally surrounded by happiness, love and being spoiled.
🌠 If there is something or someone which or who makes you even a little sad, they or that thing or situation never happened! its not real if it doesn't satisfy you
🌠 Therefore, happiness, love and being spoiled is your only basic nature so shut your negative ass thoughts and dwell in your 4d of being, living as your desired self!
WITH LOTS OF LOVE,
ADILYNN YURI
#self concept#affirm#manifestation#loa community#manifest#anons#lovlies#manifesting tips#send anons <3#shifting realities#shift#4d is your only reality#law of assumption#luxury life#bad bitch#manifesting#affiriming
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I do love the idea of an unhinged reader. Not like brutally unhinged but... like the kind that is harmlessly annoying and is just a brat to Task Force 141.
Like the mother fuckers nickname is Menace and they're somehow still alive after everything so they make it everyone's problem.
They're great at what they do, amazing even— but no team wants menaces like Menace, not even the heavens nor the hells want the damn person.
This is the same Menace who wears a devilish half-mask, but only above their mouth so people can see their shit-eating grin (think similar to the ghoul mask above) as they leave small firecrackers under the lids of toilet seats, or so people notice the way their lips curl up in mock disgust when someone is talking.
Menace who only goes through with the SAS training to one up another soldier they despised, enough to have sicked a pack of squirrels on that they personally hand fed a few days after— they even bonded enough with the little fuckers that when they were finally transferred out to be someone else's problem, the squirrels would steal the remaining soldiers foods.
Laswell, whose grand idea of knocking the boys down a peg since she's tired of their shenanigans includes getting this Menace of a person to join 141 with faint threats of blackmail— to which Coporal Menace respects, leading Kate to being the only one who is not subjected to the dumpster fire that is about to happen, but is only encouraged by her wife.
Price, who in his right mind, nearly rejects the idea of this misfit joining because of their turnover rate but gives in when Laswell tells him it would be worth it— that her wife likes them and they're an excellent solider after all.
Immediately upon arrival, Menace lives up to their name— pissing on the side of the building as if to mark their new territory before deciding it would be a good idea to rile up the behemoth of a man by asking Price: "Didn't anyone tell the poor bastard that Halloween was four fuckin' months ago? Look at 'em he looks emo."
It wasn't until then that the poor Captain realized how much of an untamed brat his new corporal was— only to be further set in after the first two weeks on base.
Sure Menace got along with Soap, but they were far too alike for Menace's likings and Gaz, sweet sweet Gaz, gave them a few too man odd glances and playfully snide remarks for their liking— meanwhile Ghost had made them scrub the bathroom from top to bottom with a small sponge, and well they could already see the forming regret in Price's eyes.
So Menace did what they did best.
It started out simple: silently attaching balloons on strings to the back of their clothes without them noticing, flipping all of the furniture upside down during the middle of the night, purposefully mocking every single move of one of the operators for a full day, sugar in the salt shaker or salt in the sugar dish, you name it they did it.
Glitterbomb the captain? Oh yeah, and there's still glitter in his mustache.
Tied the two sergeants' doors together so that neither could open it? Done and done, they were locked in their rooms for a good hour until someone cut the rope.
Move the lieutenant’s furniture two inches to the right so that he would constantly stub his toe? Yeah, you can practically see him fuming after every trip to his office.
And what irked the lads the most? Menace kept getting away without being caught— managing to even out sneak Ghost, which the only reason for it is: Menace knowing they don't know what they look like without that mask. So obviously they take it off and blend in with the many other people on base.
They made a fool of their sergeants, their lieutenant, and their captain and it was time to get back at the cunning prankster— but Menace grew suspicious. Usually they would have been booted out by a normal team by then, but what Menace came to realize a bit too late was that Task Force 141 was not normal.
And reality came to a head when Menace was called to Price's office to collect something— only for that something to be a bucket of ice cold water falling onto their head and for the captain to tell their now soaking wet and cold Coporal: "Game's on, brat."
#cod mw2#gaz cod#ghost cod#john price#kyle gaz garrick#john soap mctavish#soap cod#price cod#call of duty x reader#cod x male reader#john price x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#honestly can turn this into smut#menace reader#task force 141#tf141 are totally brat tamers while also being brats#tf 141 x reader#drabble
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Hyunnie thst type of bf to have a spa day with u when u had a rough day at work and he be like
Getting face masks and wine ready and he be like
"Spill the tea baby, what happened"😭
spa day
FLUFF/SUGGESTIVE THEMES BELOW CUT – MINORS, AGELESS & DEFAULT BLOGS; DNI
cw: gn reader, established relationship, food & alcohol mentioned, it gets suggestive at the end, hehe. words: 1k ~ (1,002)
a/n: soft thought turned slightly hard? mhm, yes, hehe. i dont make the rules, my mind told me to do it! i hope you enjoy! don’t forget to leave feedback, reblog and tell me what you think here. i hope you all enjoy! ‹3
dont repost. dont translate. feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!
“i'm so over today. freaking dumb ass people and their dumb ways of thinking. how can i give you a refund on something you used months ago!?” you mumble to yourself as you throw your bag on the floor and kick your shoes off.
your commotion makes hyunjin jump in his seat. he puts down his paintbrush and wipes his hands on an old tee. he peeks his head out of the studio door, brows furrowed together as he notices how stressed and unamused you look.
“fucking people. i don't get paid enough to deal with the bs.” you continue to grumble. you go to flop down on the sofa but a pair of strong and warm arms pulls you out of your bubble and back down to reality.
“oof!” you grunt as hyunjin pulls you into his chest. he rocks you side to side, stroking your hair softly.
“rough day?”
“you could say that.” you laugh bitterly before melting into hyunjin's chest.
“want to talk about it?”
"yeah, that'd be nice.” you whisper.
“ok. but go take a shower first.”
“trying to say i smell?!” you look up at him. hyunjin thinks for a split second and nods. you scoff and gently slap his chest. “ok ok, finee.”
you push yourself off him and walk to the bathroom. you do your usual shower routine, feeling a hundred times better and more relaxed in your comfy lounge wear.
you open the door to the bathroom and walk to the living area, gasping at how it currently looks.
the coffee table moved to the side to make room for two cushions and a blanket. candles lit up in the room with the tv on low volume. hyunjin dressed in shorts and his robe, his hair up on a half ponytail.
on the coffee table are two glasses of wine, bowls filled with your favourite snacks and treats, two facemasks and other spa inspired items.
hyunjin looks up at you as he pours you a glass before setting the bottle on the table. he gives you a warm grin before walking to you.
“what is this?” you whisper, still in awe.
"thought the best way to help you relax was to have a spa day!”
“you did all this in the time i was in the shower?” hyunjin nods and grins, clearly impressed with his handiwork. “that's impressive.”
“haha, thank you! now come and relax.” he guides you to the cushions. you sit down cross legged as he hands you a glass of wine.
“thank you.” you take the glass and take a big sip of it.
“easy there tiger. at least wait until food arrives.” he laughs
“you ordered food?”
“yeah, your favourite!”
“god i fuckin' love you.”
“i love you too.” hyunjin puts down his glass and grabs a face pack and a headband. he hands you the band and waits until you have finished putting it on.
he opens the pack and gently puts it on your face, soothing it out with his fingers. you hum softly at the refreshing coolness of the pack. you close your eyes slowly and sip your wine as you relax.
“all i need is some cucumbers on my eyes.” you mumble. hyunjin laughs softly before putting a mask on himself, relaxing beside you and sipping his wine.
“so, tell me what happened.”
“ugh. well–” you go on a rant and rave about work, about the customers, managers and bosses. the more you talk, the more annoyed you start to feel. hyunjin simply nods his head and listens to you.
he's good like that. he won't interrupt you in the slightest and just let you go on. once finished, does he soothe you with some kisses and hugs.
halfway through your long rant, the doorbell rings. hyunjin answers the door to the food delivery guy, forgetting about his mask. the delivery guy gives hyunjin a shocked face before laughing when hyunjin explains the situation.
he walks back to you, explaining what just happened. you laugh and make jokes about it, forgetting about your rough day at work and why you were so angsty to begin with.
“thank you, hyun.” he looks at you as he peels off his mask.
“for?”
“for this. i appreciate it greatly.”
"no problem! i hate seeing you distressed so this is the least i can do for you.” you hum softly and take your own mask off.
after eating the food, hyunjin gives your hands a massage and even paints your nails. you do the same, matching the colour he has given you. you both enjoy each others company and enjoy what he has done for you.
you can't believe how lucky you are.
“strip.” you blink at his sudden request before noticing the bottle of massage oil in his hand. you strip yourself of your tee, resting on your stomach with your chin on your hands.
hyunjin straddles you and pours the lotion onto your back. you shiver at the coldness which makes him laugh.
“wasn't expecting a massage, hyun.” you giggle
“it's not a spa session without a massage!”
"mhm, i guess you're right.” you grin before groaning. his thumbs dig into your tense back muscles, fingers working their magic on you.
you squirm underneath him, moaning and groaning. hyunjin swallows thickly as something so innocent is sounding so lewd to him. he feels himself heat up and his groin to feel warm.
“babe.. please, can you keep the moaning to a minimum.” he begs.
"but your fingers feel so good, hyun.” you grunt innocently as he digs into your muscles.
"yn.. please..” he huffs. you ignore him. hyunjin bites his lip hard, his penis twitching several times.
“h-hyunjin.” you moan softly.
“fuck.” you squeal as he turns you on your back suddenly. your eyes widen as you look up at hyunjin. his eyes filled with lust as he licks his lips, ready to devour you.
“you're doing this on purpose yn. you must really enjoy riling me up.”
#💀👑#skz smut#skz fluff#stray kids smut#stray kids fluff#skz hard hours#skz hard thoughts#stray kids hard hours#stray kids hard thought#skz soft thoughts#skz soft hours#stray kids soft thoughts#stray kids soft hours#hyunjin x you#hyunjin x reader#skz x you#skz x reader#stray kids x reader#stray kids x you#hyunjin smut
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