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#well ofc i had to make this for today
ashleyslorens · 11 months
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AARON TVEIT as Enjolras LES MISÉRABLES (2012) dir. Tom Hooper
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cyellolemon · 27 days
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HAPPY TDOV i couldn't not post Olive my beloved <33
(he/him)
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glownery · 27 days
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wishing everyone who celebrates a happy easter and an even happier transgender day of visibility 🐣🪩🫶🪽
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howdydopillar · 5 months
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remembering how my laptop decided to nearly explode when one of my friends (who has NEVER seen a single piece of care bears media but does know about their existence) and I were trying to watch Oopsy Does It! on my personal Google Drive- over a Google Meet- and the last thing we heard from my laptop as it was about to give up on itself, was the intro music, but especially the “WE ARE THE CARE BEARS 🗣️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️” but it was very distorted and super loud- like- bit-crushed loud (from the laptop glitching out, not from anything that was going on from the meet or from the drive or even from the quality of the movie.)
15.5/10
horrifying experience. I’m glad we were able to witness it, wasn’t happy about fixing my laptop afterwards and having cancelling our plans to watch the movie for the night
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#these past two weeks have been so intense that ive just.. not spoken about it once i got home from work#blocked it all out#my beloved colleague whose desk is next to mine has cancer#breast and uterus. she needs two major surgeries#they just diagnosed her two weeks ago#so we've been trying to deal with that as colleagues and friends#because we love and miss her and i am so deeply sad as well#but i feel like i couldn't process that at all bc two days after the news of her diagnosis i was asked to take on half of her work#on top of my fulltime#which i agreed to do bc i like her tasks and i want to help her and i also know i can do it#but it does feel very off bc i know i don't earn enough money for this workload to be long term and it is def like this#for the coming four months at least#so i did tell my manager that i would like a raise and. that bitch told me to BUY MORE SECOND HAND SHIT.#i seriously thought i saw my life flash before my eyes#then the day after she asked one of my colleagues who's been with the firm for over 30 years whether she was looking for another job maybe?#which caused that colleague to instantly go home in tears and be home from basically a nervous breakdown the past 1.5 week#which is her full right and i support her with all my heart but bc my management sucks it meant that we had to also carry her tasks ofc#i felt soooo spread thin and super super angry actually but i didn't even realise how angry i was until last thursday my colleague w cancer#came by the office. and talked about all of it. and i suddenly realised how sad i was but then also how angry#but i was just blocking it all out trying to stay afloat#bc we told her about what the manager had said and she said “i hope that i get the chance to really tell her how it is someday.”#“because the stress she causes with people can actually kill you. just look at me.”#and the rest of the day i felt so ready to be done with everything actually#but seeing her anger made me see my own anger#and released me of my own pent up emotions bc i had actual leg pains this week and it was purely psychosomatic#i then managed to tell some friends yesterday about what was going on and their outrage spurred me on even more#so today i emailed hr. demanding a raise#doing this amount of work while constantly feeling like the house is on fire while also struggling financially seriously makes me suicidal#and i am not joking#so.. if nothing comes of that im leaving that job and not looking back
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ronanlynchbf · 8 months
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hell day today and i'm only two hours into my EIGHT HOUR SHIFT
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#9 to 5 by dolly parton starts playing in the background..#literally had to open up shop alone 2day and also was entirely alone for the first 45 min. of my shift so that was already a negative start#to the day + i heard that i can't have my break later than two thirty which is very bad for me bc 1) there'll be a lot of ppl all around me#when i'm eating which i already dislike and 2) like 85% of ppl taking their break around that time are VERY noisy eaters so even worse and#then 3) it'll be really loud in the room as well bc everyone's talking loudly and eating and the cutlery's clanging against plates and such#and also some ppl have actual full-blown arguments with each other in the break room bc half the ppl here hate each other's guts so more#negatives to the day and then on top of that we've had sooooo many annoying customers already today who r just. intent on making u stressed#out and upset and literally will tell u to your face to 'do your job better' like bro...i can easily tell you haven't worked in retail....#also someone hung their clothes on the rack outside the fitting rooms which is where u hang ur clothes when you're DONE fitting them & don'#want them bc they don't fit or don't sit right or u just don't rlly like them after all so if clothes are hanging there we the ppl working#there WILL take them and hang them back in their original places what did u expect to happen?? anyway someone hung the clothes they had#tried on already and did want there and i reached out to take them bc like. that's what we do here..we hang the clothes on the 'discard#rack' back in the store bc else the rack gets stuffed and the woman literally grabbed my arm and said 'those are mine what do u think you'r#doing' LIKE?????? GIRL THE RACK'S THERE FOR A REASONNNN ofc i'm going to assume u don't want them anymore if they're hanging there that's#why it's called the DISCARD rack....also how am i to know those specific clothes are yours HONESTLYYYYYY STFU AND GET OFF ME#ALSO some dude was like (to his child but like. looking at me while he said it.) 'this guy needs a haircut doesn't he' bc my hair is kinda#long and apparently i passed today. LIKE 1st of all kind of a rude thing to say to a stranger innit 2nd of all setting a great example to#your child there just casually commenting on other ppl's looks like that👍 3rd of all jokes on you you wouldn't consider me a guy if#you Knew most likely. thanks for that little zing of glee much obliged <3 but also man just piss off will you. 4th of all my hair isn't eve#that long....like the ends of it are just shy of my shoulders wdym LONG if u knew the long-haired guys i know you'd faint.#anyway. great start of the day. i still have six more hours to go 🥴#ALSO no surprise this always happens but my legs already hurt SOOOOOOOO BADDDDDD :(((((((((((#r.txt
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thedeadthree · 2 months
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that, “my father is the worst man alive and i am his favorite daughter .” quote is SOO cypha and emmy coded 🌞🪞✨😵‍💫
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widevibratobitch · 11 months
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#coming to tumblr for the first time in three days just to bitch because i feel like shit <333#sorry if i havent responded to your message i will as soon as i get a grip but rn im just too busy#both with uni and with crying because a friend said a mean thing to me lol#and because im tired of this new friendship already and tired of hearing this girl talking how great she is lol#am i jealous? fuck yeah i am.#and it's not like she's mean like straight up. cause like.#when i say im really considering quitting and dropping out she tries to encourage me ig#but then she follows it up with 'ofc *I* never had a problem with this and that because it always just came naturally to me teehee#but yknow. dont give up uwu'#and she keeps sending me recordings of her singing to tell her how good she is and always tells me how her teacher praises her#and like. its cool. like i get it that its a nice feeling when you do something well and wanna share that joy with a friend#but idk. i just think its kinda. well not mean but a litt#*a little tone deaf? when ive just been telling her that im in a Bad Place rn and my voice isnt working as it should#and my pianist is bullying me and i end up crying on almost every lesson#and she hits me with a 'damn that sucks fuck that pianist dont give up tho <3#now do you wanna listen to me sing bel raggio lusinghier like a pro and my professor telling me i am sublime?'#also when i tell her that im sorry that im not very social and i just cannot stay and chat cause im having a horrible day today#and really dont feel well and she's like 'yeah i havent noticed anything you're always like that... *side eye*' in a way that suggests#im a horrible friend cause im not talking with her enough and yet again im disappointing her (aint that familiar lol)#i just. idk. the last two-three weeks have been absolutely horrible to me. i cant get out of bed i havent done a single colorful make up#in so long ive basically forgotten how to do that. and i loved doing fun make up looks that make people tell me i look like a clown.#but i just dont have the energy to do anything more than put on a random tshirt and spray dry shampoo on my unwashed hair#i dont even wear my rings anymore. ive stopped caring about being the pinkest slayest queerest looking bitch in the room cause i just. cant#and even some casual friend of mine asked me yesterday if im okay cause they can see something is Not Right. but SHE not only doesnt notice#anything. i have a feeling she feels like im disappoing and neglecting her because i cant be bothered to text with her 24/7#like idk. maybe its just my imagination but i barely even feel like an actual person. more like just a homunculus made to trail after her#and listen to her bragging about how pretty/talented/unbothered she is#oh and also for her to keep dissing m/ozart lol like idk why it hurts me so bad but then ig its not that unusual to feel shitty#when someone keeps talking shit about something you really love and are passionate about and making you feel like an idiot#because you like it. because its stupid and boring and you're a simpleton for enjoying it instead of liking sth more 'ambitious'
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unproduciblesmackdown · 10 months
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similar to the greentext stuff - i was visiting with my neighbors and their grandkids were around, and I said to this eight year old, "Hey, you wanna know something cool? I was playing the game when the Endermen came out." and his eyes went wide, like this kid looked like i told him i landed on the moon. His grandma thought it was really funny, and she said she has no idea what i'm talking about, but her grandbabies do, and that's incredible to her.
oh that's fun lmao, when minecraft & that update's existed for more than your whole life, and yknow being that young and like Next Year fr is this huge time scale away, a couple of years is a quarter of your life thus far and like maybe nigh half of the part of your life you actually have longterm memories for....i was checking out this dev's blog's archives about a:tdd's release in 2010 & in one entry they compared the implicitly Roughly concurrent release of Minecraft and i was like hey whoah. forever primarily being a game i've Heard Of more than any more direct exposure so i had no precise sense of [before minecraft release] [after minecraft release] Year 0 there but it's like for sure back in thee day when minecraft was a new thing, huh
#add in that [i also basically Heard Of mass effect but that's a game series w/a 2010 median which i had Any knowledge abt already]#so i have that reference point for a still like [niche video for When You've Played These Games For Sure] there but then like#if you were ten or even 5 yrs younger at the time you May Well Be much more at sea as your starting point there#(but i mean not that much; i didn't know a ton. reread those wikipedia plot summaries myself)#enderman came out? happy pride#shoutout to this one time i crossed paths w/this kid who was at the time probably like late middle school early high school age#who started talking abt pokemon like Clearly A Big Interest and i'm like my only Direct experience is playing pokemon go but i know Some#stuff b/c i was 5 in '99 when it was first making that huge splash lol. can make Some remarks....but also just Listening Attentively To You#Monologue like uh huh go off....i sure remember like the Sense of a couple yr's sagacity like being 9 i think reading a book abt 6th or 7th#graders (i.e. two or three yrs older) like My God They Must Be So Mature....#and like ofc when skimming passages as an adult it's like omg l'enfants. Both Perspectives Being Accurate respectively lol#my vintage experiences like i've def saved things on the floppy discs of [save icons imagery]. have heard the dialup tones organically....#but also; say; Home Computers That You Didn't Really Need To Know Much Abt Computers To Use were forever an everyday thing for me#having been born mid '90s....vs like in the '80s being nicher but also like. the programs to amateur code not being As Complex either#like [working on cars] of yore vs more modernly lmao....plus ofc in their designs; opening up a desktop Tower vs what? a tablet??#ppl my age who had more substantial Online Access earlier than i did maybe having at least picked up some html; which i did not lol#also didn't have too much Gamer Experience ever; what i did largely desktop then laptop pc wasd+mouse style....#didn't have a smartphone till maybe 5 yrs after they were starting to become more commonplace#vs that again to an 8 yr old of today [commonplacer smartphones] is your whole life basically too. i remember when we flipped those phones.#(i do fr lol. did have one of those first for a good while.)#granpa granpa....mh being fourteen yrs old meaning like the Teen Fans of Today were probably not watching it as it aired lol#whereas i Was that teen fan of those yesteryears. and all my stories for it like fuckin uhhhhhh [crickets chirping] [studio audience laugh]#though You Don't Need The Fans like mh is a long movie ppl can newly discover Whenever that holds up; plus it has bonus lore#mostly what i could even Possibly bring is just the particularly nicher older bonus lore. but like grandpa simpson (the simpsons) for sure#which is to say: humorously irrelevant & perhaps somewhat cantankerous#whilest i'm vaguely aware there may have also been that minecraft resurgence (esp through streaming?) from 2020 on....#but evidently Like Mh something that continually revives / takes on New Fans / Participants#for sure i might well be playing some tf2 myself if i had the technical capability (i would have the poor personal ability i always did lol#real games of yore but it never gets old also. though i know Of Late there was a bot problem / just neglected maintenance? that get fixed?#These Have Been The Tag Tangents. maxed out thirty tags i know that's right
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you know it's bad when you hit the 30 tag limit
#like shut up i wasn't done#i feel so unbearably hurt and betrayed like how can i be SO. unimportant to him so less of a priority that he's literally organising his#desk instead of talking to me taking five mins to talk to an agent book a ticket in tatkal#i told him i had to be back by 20 even before coming here on like 5th#and ive been reminding hin this everyday since after diwali#still he just. doesn't care?#and im his daughter? am i his daughter? does it even mean anything?????#ive never felt more alienated from my family than today#isn't it sad i don't even expect anything from mom all she does is tries to lighten the mood by making jokes#im so sick of her even the sight of her her voice makes me want to shout at her#i don't do it ofc but still#everyone is so selfish she's so selfish too she's always complaining about how i don't love her how i don't give her a chance#but that she'll stay away from all important thinhs that actually matter to me like what's the point of having a mother then??? i have my#siblings to listen to me i have my friends you i need u to be an adult and fucking help me in real terms#nvmind that path is just hopeless#anyway in tired of my small fucking life and my same small fucking problems and my own fucking self#everything would be okay if i just studied a little bit harder#idk ive been practicing saying it out loud that i can't study more than tui and after seven times i can say it out loud now#without crying or my voice watering#so hopefully it will go well#tho in my experience i never actually get to sya the stuff i practice to say to him because he dominates the convo so early so fast im#left speechless and shocked and on the verge of tears AGAUN#it's fine im calm now#but after crying headache ugh i did not miss u at all going back to storing all breakdowns in a bottle
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lateseptemberdawn · 7 months
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It's so confusing even to me sometimes especially when it perhaps matters the most how I am an empath as in I will feel like crying while watching someone else cry out if their hearts and I could literally feel their pain but then I'm also so detached like so much so that if someone I know is going through something (as in trouble in paradise (yeah I'm eloquent)) and completely losing it over that person, not being able to function properly like not eating being sad feeling depressed -- it just makes no sense to me??? Like I can't even begin to try to comfort other than just pat pat like??? So you found out they don't care about you don't you just instantly lose all feelings as well? Don't you feel cheated and ridiculed?? Does that mean nothing to you, your self-respect?? And if it does all those things then why do you feel sad. What do you feel sad for. I would feel angry. So incredibly angry and I would simply think I was an idiot to not notice the signs or to stay for as long as I did and it would be like a switch just completely off. I don't think I could ever hold a human above myself. And this makes me wonder if I could ever love at all.
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nc-vb · 10 months
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oh no a new kink has been discovered but not for me
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noxtivagus · 1 year
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i seriously love music & stories so much
#🌙.rambles#i did not mean to ramble i told myself i'll be productive today but as usual i have a lot of thoughts. n it is my wont to just.#forget everything else n write....#sigh i love listening to music sm n stories n words n wtvr just everything in the world. i take in everything. observe n analyze it all#i love. music. i love stories i love music sm as a form of story-telling & then w the emotion in it too? the way it cld be interpreted n#everything. yeah really just everything oh my god i cld ramble on n on. I HAVE SM TO RAMBLE ABOUT OH NO#the endless possibilities n opportunities in this world. the unknown future that fascinates me so much. the depth n beauty of creation 🥹#for one i admire like. video game composers for making the ost fit so well into the game n#i'm so gay wait i looked at discord rq n looking at my silva pfp.... she's so pretty i lov her sm#hmmm thinking about some stuff n while i've always had a sort of interest for theatre n. appreciation ofc n. fondness for its aesthetic#i wna get more into it ><#me remembering i also really did love to paint when i was a kid i wish i cultivated that into a bigger skill :c#i remember i really did read so much books back then damn. i wna read n write again aaaa#i started piano when i was 7 n i had lessons for a few summers consecutively then stopped for a while n it's been so long now#but i remember my teacher then saying that. soon if i really cultivate that skill i really could've#i have regrets regarding that bcs in gr3 apollo n i also had this invitation to this math thing advanced lessons n all#i overshare too much on social media wait the words really flow when i get started this is why i don't rlly talk to others w these stuff :<#i'd love to i really do but i'm afraid of being too much or too little where it matters#that said though i really love. yk creation. this world being so full of creators making their own creations in their own way#i love thinking about how. there's so much things in the world that affects n influences. yeah.#help i am making no sense with my phrasing#infinite possibilites in life. surely there's no denying how daunting n intimidating n scary it may be#but god i live for. that. yk the. my curiosity hdfkdfjdlk#i cannot word nymore but :< i really love life so much thinking about all these sort of things give me so much comfort from#all the cruel pressure in this world. the burden of regrets. the feeling of loss and failure.#with. these as my wings. these moments these. emotions n thoughts i can indulge peace n time n comfort in. for my own self#perhaps i can fly free in my own way in my own time.
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knifeprtys · 2 years
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#sibling death tw#rainne#it might just b bcos im sic in the head but seeing how upset absolutely everyone is is kinda comforting#like ive had ppl tell me they had to leave work when they found out n stuff#and its like right??? it's devastating! she WAS that important and special#ive been inviting everyone to the funeral even tho we haven't made any arrangements yet and i mean literally everyone#ofc i tell them its okay if they cant make it n we understand#but everyones been like OF COURSE I'LL TRY MY BEST TO COME ITS RAINNE!!!!!!#even when ppl who barely knew her are reaching out or ppl she hadn't been in contact w for years its all genuine we r all shattered#i wish she knew how loved she was and how much she meant to people before all of this#i thought it would annoy me seeing randoms come out of the wood work but it doesn't#what dOES is everyone being like now WE have to stay in contact#i hope they dnt mean it#esp my foster parents we had to contact them ofc even tho we've been out of care for the 20 - 15 yrs#and theyre so religious and they were telling us abt their own kids and how theyre pastors and ambassadors now#and its just like . buddy i lay in my bed and i plan to for the rest of my life#my brothers doing good w his life but i am noT a success story#n i cant bare them trying i know they mean well but itsss overrrrrr for meeeeeeee#the waiting abt for everything is killing me too#im gonna try and distract myself today rbing silly little pics on here feels wrong but i rly do use tumblr to like. soothe myself lol#every time smth bad has happened in the past ive been on here just rbing as normal even if i was full on sobbing#its my brothers birthday today too so im still gonna try and make it nice for him#idk how but im gonna try
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multi-lefaiye · 2 years
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[Image Description: An MSPaint doodle of a cat with glasses and fluffy bangs sitting and looking down sadly. End ID.]
tfw you see really nasty violently transphobic shit on your dash and it puts you in a real sad dysphoric mood </3
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the-kipsabian · 2 months
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i should be writing and instead i just spent a good while reading through some of my old lynn fics cause someones been leaving kudos on them on ao3 and now i miss her and sami so much good lord
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