#we just all suck at it except for my dad so he spends the whole time being like well why don't you just do it this way. dad i CANT that's | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

aphrodisiac-siren · 2 months

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Home~ Neteyam x Metkayina!reader

Summary: Leaving behind everything he knew was hard for Neteyam and then adapting to the ways of the new clan was even harder. He'd push himself, overwork and exhaust himself even, to live upto his family's expectations; never really giving his own wants a second thought. That's why Y/N was the prefect companion for him, someone who kept things in his life balanced, who made sure to let him know that what he wanted was just as important, perhaps even more so, than what everyone else wanted of him.

//slow burn, cute Neytiri and Y/N bonding moment plus Lo'ak being a menace and HEAVY ANGST//

masterlist, Part 3

Part 2

🫧

The previous couple of days seemed to be the most fun Y/N had had in a while. She and her siblings spent almost all their time with the Sully kids, teaching them all that they needed to know to survive out here with the reef people. It was refreshing to have a break from her own lessons of healing and hunting and granted that the forest Na'vi were taking their time with adapting to the new place, it was still enjoyable nevertheless to be around them.

Aonung was still hostile, refusing to give the kids a break for even a slight mistake, with the exception of Tuk. He seemed fond of her, on some occasions treating her just like how he treated his own sisters but he was too proud to admit that he'd grown a soft spot for the little one.

Out of the whole lot, Y/N had to concede that Kiri was the fastest learner. It was impressive really how much of a natural she was. Though Y/N also made a note that Neteyam was the more ardent learner. She'd catch him practicing their sign language by himself when the others played on the beach or he'd work on his diving whilst his sisters picked sea shells. She once even saw him trying to teach his Ikran sign language whilst everyone was enjoying dinner.

"Thank-you" he said aloud as he slowly signed, so that the animal could register the gesture "this means thank-you"

As promised, in between lessons, Neteyam would treat her to some random pieces of information he'd learned from his dad about the sky people. He taught her a few words and phrases, being as patient with her as she was with him. There were times when even Lo'ak butted in, trying to have his two seconds of fame as well.

"Not to brag or anything, but I used to visit the sky-people’s camp like all the time" he flexed, grinning like an idiot who'd just won a prize "Oh teach her how to say 'suck my dick' bro"

"S-suck my-"

"NO!" Neteyam practically jumped. The last thing he wanted was to get in trouble for teaching the chief's daughter vulgar profanities "Lo'ak you skxawng! Go away"

In conclusion, the Sullys were an absolute joy to have around.

"You spend too much time with them" Aonung spoke coldly, pulling his sister out of her train of thought. He merely tolerated those kids out of obligation and because of his status as the chief's son. Beyond that, he didn’t give two fucks about them "even Tsireya isn’t tailing after them outside of lessons"

"Tailing after?" Y/N raised a brow, not to happy with the tone her brother was using "I'm sorry, why is me hanging out with them a problem again?"

"They don’t belong here" he said slowly, as if by doing so she'd grasp what he was saying and agree "ever since their arrival, we've been forced to baby them and teach them things we did effortlessly at the age of ten. You and I both haven’t had a day to ourselves to do our training much less relax"

"Those kids are doing their best" Y/N sighed, unsure why it was always her who had to deal with her brother's whining "you can tell they’re trying their hardest' they really want to learn-"

"Well their best isn’t good enough" He snapped, Y/N rolling her eyes at his outburst "I want them to go back"

"Shut up Aonung, don’t be such an asshole" she huffed, using an english insult that Lo'ak taught her and Neteyam begged never to say.

"What?" Aonung looked at her like she said something in gibberish, which to him was what the entirety of the english language would probably sound like.

"Nothing"

"Whatever, look at this" the boy struck a pose to flex his biceps, looking at his arms proudly. Y/N rolled her eyes at his antics. It was a bit funny how the conversation was abruptly halted just because Aonung wanted to flex his muscles. Brothers.

Not wanting to stick around for him to go back to his previous argument once he'd finished admiring himself, she left him to fond over himself and went to go take a walk somewhere away from the beach at which they were.

"Where you going?" he called out to her, smile dropping

"Away from you" she said over her shoulder, brushing the sand off her thighs.

"Why? I wasn’t done talking"

"Exactly why I'm going"

Not having much to do until later in the day, when she'd teach some weaving with her father, she decided to go help feed the Ikran.

They usually stayed near the far end of the village, occasionally vanishing for a few hours just to fly around. The clan's people brought them baskets of fish and sometimes fruit to keep them well fed and less cranky.

Y/N hummed to herself whilst carrying the basket that held their food. It was kept in a little shack at a distance from the Ikran. She was curious as to why there wasn’t anyone there at the time, this was usually when someone went to go feed them anyway. Not really caring much, she happily skipped toward them, slightly content that she could admire the creatures alone.

Her enthusiasm died down however, when she rounded the corner and saw Neytiri already there with a similar basket of fish beside her.

Y/N’s chirpy humming had the woman turning around, silently eyeing the girl from up to down.

"Hi" she meekly greeted, awkwardly hugging the basked like it was the only source of comfort she had at the moment "I came to feed them"

"Seze doesn’t like being fed" Neytiri flatly said, quickly glancing at the Ikran to her right who was busy digging into the basket. The other bird-like creatures were curled up for a nap, probably already done with their meal.

"Is that yours?" Y/N put down the basket in defeat, a bit disappointed she couldn’t stick around with the foreign animals.

Neytiri paused to study her some more. Y/N was a sweet girl by nature, her daughter Tuk never failed to mention that to her. She was patient and very smart, very proficient too. Despite her timid voice, she presented herself quite well, shoulders rarely ever hunched and chin up. She was curious little thing, that much was very conspicuous about her; always eager to learn or delve into anything new.

"Come" she beckoned for the younger girl who approached without a word, still holding on to the basket "put that down, Seze will only eat if it’s not directly being fed, she hates being babied"

"Sounds like my brother" Y/N mumbled as she did what Neytiri told, earning a brief grin from the woman. She took a step back and watched as the Ikran dived hungrily into the second basket of fish, despite not finishing the first one "eats like him too... don’t tell anyone I said that"

Neytiri's phlegmatic exterior melted away, laughter replacing her somber expression. Y/N was just humorous as she was diligent, an adorable little thing the older woman found her.

"Did you catch the fish yourself?" she asked, tone much more gentle and motherly now, which visibly seemed to put the younger Na'vi at ease.

"N-no" Y/N responded but quickly opened her mouth to futher justify her answer, as if she felt the need to provide an explanation so as to not be underestimated by Neytiri "but I am good at spearfishing, I've caught plenty of fish you know"

"Ah. But I must confess, catching fish with my arrows is much more easier than these spears you use" She told her and watched the girl's face contour into a look of confusion which she quickly masked with a polite smile, just nodding in agreement "you haven’t trained with a bow and arrow?"

Y/N only nodded a 'no'

"Hm," Neytiri hummed "I will see you little while before eclipse near the southern side of the reef, I hope you don’t mind using Lo'ak's bow while you learn"

Y/N's face lit up to a point where Neytiri was expecting for her whole head to just start glowing like the sun any moment.

"You'll teach me?" she excitedly asked, voice a pitch higher than usual "really?"

Neytiri only chuckled adoringly at her ardor to learn and responded by just ruffling her hair.

___

Y/N felt like she had conquered all of Pandora by securing a lesson with Neytiri.

She happily skipped to the beach to find her sister Tsireya and tell her about her day so far. She knew her sister was usually whiling away her time picking shells around this time of day, to use them later to braid into her hair.

What she didn’t expect was to run into her idiot brother and his friends caught up in a rowdy fight with Lo'ak and Neteyam. The boys were like hooligans, kicking, punching and pulling tails. Kiri stood in the distance, heavily judging the fools.

“Guys! Hey!” She made a run for it, wanting to stop this fight before any of the skxawngs managed to seriously hurt someone “Aonung!”

Her brother was too caught up trying to free himself from Lo’ak who was pulling his ear all while being dragged across the sand by his tail.

“That’s enough-“

A loud grunt interrupted her and she looked to the side to see Neteyam gracefully knee one of the other boys right in the balls.

“Stop it NOW!” She bellowed, jumping right into the mess of angry teen boys. Not wanting to accidentally hurt the chief’s daughter, Aonung’s friend’s begrudgingly seized their punching and scooted a few steps back.

“Is this how you want the forest people to know us?” She scolded, ignoring the wincing from her brother “that the Metkayina people are hostile bullies? Really Aonung?”

“That bastard threw the first punch!” One of them hissed at Lo’ak, who reacted by hissing back “maybe you should consider vouching for your people and not favour their asses for a change”

“Watch your mouth” despite being in pain, Aonung limped to toward Y/N, putting himself between her and his friend with the snarky tone “do not speak to my sister that way”

The boy only scoffed in response.

“Aonung” Y/N coldly spoke, though there was an undertone of concern lacing her words. Her brother was really beat up, face bruised, lip bleeding and skin scraped here and there “get outta here, go get patched up”

“He’s right you know” he lowly told her, eyes menacingly glancing toward the Sullys “he did start-“

“Then you should’ve put a stop to it” was all she said, staring up at him until her brother caved in and turned away, muttering a string of profanities under his breath that his mother would indefinitely ground him for.

“And you” Y/N turned to the Sully kids as Aonung and his friends made their exit “I know their teasing can get a lot sometimes but did you really have to hit him?”

“You can’t be serious” Lo’ak looked almost offended, as if he wasn’t expecting her at all to scold him “if it wasn’t for that bitc-“

“Mind what you say Lo’ak, he is my brother. A lot to deal with sometimes but he is still my family- the son of Tonowari” she then turned her attention to Kiri “and you just stood there watching and giggling, I always thought you were the mature one”

“Hey don’t drag her into this” Neteyam stepped forward, shielding his siblings both physically and in spirit “they poked fun at her, maybe save the scolding for the person who actually needs it hm?”

“Do not tell me who I ought to scold at and at who I shouldn’t. You were all at fault here to some extent” she hissed, her sharp fangs briefly making an appearance “is resorting to physical violence something you’re used to over choosing to resolve it with civil conversation?”

“Do not speak to me that way” Neteyam hissed, slowly losing his calm composure. He was well known and well respected in his clan, always treated and spoke to like he was royalty. Not a single person had ever spoken rudely much less snapped at him in such a manner. He was a warrior in training to be a strong leader “I’m to be the next Olo'eyktan-“

“No you were going to be Olo'eyktan, before your father left the forest” Y/N was letting her anger get the best of her, not bothering to think even for a second about the words that were leaving her mouth “now you live here in our clan, as a normal person with no high station. So you make your peace-”

“My father is Toruk Makto, he’s fought and won a war against the sky people” Neteyam’s voice was hauntingly low, a growl escaping in between a few words. The way he spoke, the way his tail arose, he almost looked like an animal waiting to pounce on his prey. He was well aware that he was no longer in line to be the next chief but hearing it from someone else in such circumstances made his blood boil “Your father says the reef people haven’t been at war during his time. Take his title of chief away and what does make you then? A nobody; because while I may never be chief, I will always be the son of the great warrior Toruk Makto and you are a girl that was simply born to someone who was already heir to the Metkayina clan”

There was silence.

Deafening silence.

Lo’ak was the short-tempered one in the family, always quick to say things in the heat of the moment; notorious for showing fits of rage and making impulsive choices but even he had to agree: Neteyam had gone too far.

“Bro” he softly called out to Neteyam, sharing nervous glances with Kiri who was just as stunned by their older brother’s outburst. It was unlike him to lose him temper and just say things without thinking.

As if his little brother’s voice was a force that pulled him back to reality, Neteyam’s eyes went wide with realisation after he’d only just processed what he’d said, knowing well that it was too late already.

“No, Y/N” he poorly began, tail drooping down again in shame “I did not mean to-“

“I’m so glad the Omatikaya do not have to face the shame of having to call you their Olo'eyktan” Y/N’s voice was oddly calm but that’s what seemed to scare them even more. She spun on her heels, keeping her cool “there will be no lessons today. And none from me henceforth”

#avatar #avatarimagine #avatar way of water #neteyam x reader #writing #fanfiction #neteyam imagine #avatar imagine #avatar fanfiction #lo'ak imagine #lo'ak x reader #lo'ak fanfiction #neteyam fanfiction #jamie flatters

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green-socks · 1 year

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I Want Your Daddy Too

Pairing: Jake 'Hangman' Seresin x Pete 'Maverick' Mitchell (hangmav) / Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x Javy 'Coyote' Machado (brachado)

Summary: Jake's best friend and rival get together, and Jake is upset about it. He speaks into existence a threat that he ends up fulfilling, though unknowingly.

Words: 2.1k

Warnings: everyone Jake is being dramatic. Mav is Bradley's dad and I will die on that hill. Also obvs age gap with hangmav.

Notes: I thought of this scenario and got excited. Also I just wanted more Rooster/Coyote content and thought "sure I'll make it myself", but then Jake stole this show and I just always let him do anything he wants. This was meant to be very silly and quick, please don't take me seriously. I'm running with brachado for the ship name for now cause that's in line with floychado and that makes me happy.

Jake was appalled. His best friend in the entire world had betrayed him by getting together with Jake's rival. His mortal enemy. And the bastard was even serious about it.

They had both been deployed, Jake and Javy, on practically opposite sides of the world, so contact had been a little difficult. But they texted each other and ten hours later the other replied, and so on and so forth. Didn't offer the opportunity for many long conversations, but Javy still managed to tell him about a guy he had started getting real close with on the carrier. What Coyote had failed to mention, however, was who that guy was. And that Jake already knew him.

He and Javy had been inseparable ever since they met at the academy. Well, almost. It had taken Jake a while to let Javy fully in, but once he did, he knew Javy would always have his back.

Except with this one thing, apparently.

And to think, Jake had ranted about the idiot all through flight school, and Javy had listened, had agreed with him! Hadn't he?

Well, Jake would probably find out more once he calmed down some. Which might take a while. There were surely worse ways to find out your best friend was sleeping with your rival than walking in on them having sex and seeing way too much bare ass this early in the morning, but Jake couldn't come up with any at the moment.

"Javy, what the fuck! Bradshaw?! Are you fucking kidding me?" Jake yelled, not caring he sounded perhaps a little hysterical.

This was not what he'd had in mind for today. Not even in the ballpark. He had just wanted to spend the day with his bro now that they were both back in the same country. But nooo, fucking Bradshaw somehow had to ruin that too.

"How is this even happening? I thought you hated him too," Jake continued.

"Hey!"

"Shut up, Rooster."

"One, I never hated him. I just kind of let you rant, you know. I actually thought the mustache was hot this whole time–"

Jake made a noise, but Javy silenced him with a sharp look. Rooster looked smug.

"Two, I'm sorry you had to find out this way. I mean it. I wanted to wait until we were face to face to tell you." Javy really did look sorry about that.

"But three, you know how happy I've been these past few months, so please get it out of your system so you can be civil. That goes for both of you," Javy turned to Rooster. "I'm not gonna listen to you two complain about each other anymore."

Sigh. Jake can't very well refuse his best friend like that (though he's sure he'll have a hard time trying to keep his thoughts to himself), and based on the expression on his face, Rooster reluctantly agrees. Huh. Guess they can agree on something.

Jake sucks his lips to his teeth. "Fine, I guess. But Bradshaw, if you steal my best friend away from me, I swear to god I will fuck your dad." By the way both Javy and Rooster flinch, it seems his threat sounded appropriately serious. Good.

"Jake–" Javy starts, but Jake cuts him off.

"Nope, I'm outta here. Javy, call me when you're done and can hang out. Bradshaw… nice ass." And with that Jake takes his leave, giving himself a proper shake as soon as the door closes.

Why is life like this?

Thankfully all three of them did not even need to be in the same place together again until they all got called back to TOPGUN for a special detachment. So everything had been surprisingly calm and easy. Jake tolerated Javy talking about Rooster in a positive way these days. Because if he was honest, he really couldn't hate anyone making his best friend that happy. And Javy was so happy it was kind of disgusting.

But at least he got to antagonize Bradshaw in the flesh again. In a friendly-ish manner, of course. He didn't want to make Coyote suffer after all.

And at least there was a goddamn handsome man buying him beers. Well, technically he was buying them for the whole bar per Penny's rules, but Jake liked to think the man's eyes lingered on him more than any others.

If he wasn't on a self-imposed "no dickstractions" policy while training for a special detachment, and if he hadn't had to throw the older man out of the bar, he definitely would have made a move. Might have anyway, his own rules be damned. But there was no damning Penny's rules, so that was that.

Except that it wasn't, because the next day that same man walked in front of the class and smirked at Jake like he was enjoying the fact that Jake was blushing a little in embarrassment. Now he was really really glad he hadn't made a move on the guy. He wasn't looking to get court martialed or anything, and propositioning a CO definitely wasn't the best way to promote career longevity in the Navy.

But damn, Captain Mitchell was hot. The adrenaline of flying always got Jake's engine going, but never before had he been so turned on just from seeing someone else fly.

He'd always been a bit of a teacher's pet, he could admit that, but he also thought he'd gotten past the age of getting crushes on his teachers a long time ago. And yet, here he was. Jake didn't make any moves – he wasn't digging for blood out of his nose like that – but despite all that, in the privacy of his own head, he thought about the Captain a whole hell of a lot. Maybe in the shower. Or in the evening when he was trying to fall asleep. Or on his morning runs. Maybe he made an effort to talk to the man any chance he got. And, alright, maybe he flirted just a tiny bit. It was in his nature! So sue him.

In an unexpected turn of events, when Javy went into g-LOC, Jake found himself comforting Rooster and being comforted by him in return. Javy was the most important person in both of their lives, not to mention the added scare of Phoenix and Bob ejecting. Jake still wouldn't call Bradshaw a friend, but maybe they could be. They had to have more in common than either of them would have liked to believe if they were both so close with the same person. Jake would take it to his grave, but he knew that behind the mustache was a pretty solid guy and a surprisingly comforting presence, when he wanted to be.

Maverick also checked in on all three aviators in the hospital, and the Captain's presence calmed Jake down like nothing else could, even though he could see the older man was shaken by everything too.

After The Mission, after Jake had flown like hell to get Maverick and Rooster back home, he was buzzing with excess adrenaline and nowhere to put it. He visited the duo in sick bay, celebrated with the others, took a shower, tried some yoga, but nothing could make the pins prickling under his skin stop.

Even after they got back to shore, a weird, uncomfortable feeling persisted, though not as strongly as before. But eventually he ended up seeking out Maverick. Something inside him just yearned for any contact with the man. Maverick had said his door was always open for any of the Daggers, so Jake (not entirely) shamelessly took him up on that offer.

The mission was over, Maverick was no longer their instructor and direct CO. He was still a superior officer, sure, but Jake figured the Captain at least wouldn't punch him now that Jake had saved his life. So Jake decided to shoot his shot.

And Maverick didn't punch him. Instead, after some talking, when Jake kissed him, he kissed back.

They had all been given a month of leave after the mission, and three weeks of it had already passed. Jake had spent nearly all of it with Maverick at his hangar, and he couldn't have been happier. The only thing he was missing was his best friend who had taken Rooster with him back home to New Orleans.

Mav had been working on his P-51 all morning while Jake went to do a grocery run and made lunch. After eating they settled down on the couch for a little afternoon nap. The older pilot was still a little sweaty from working, his shirt a little damp, but Jake didn't mind it. He just pressed his face further into Mav's chest and let himself doze off, safe in the strong, warm embrace of his lover. He didn't think he'd ever experienced bliss like this while not in the air.

Until that bliss was most rudely interrupted by none other than Rooster Bradshaw loudly announcing his presence at the hangar.

"What the hell is happening here?" the mustached naptime-hater yelled.

Maverick shot up to a sitting position, making Jake's still sleepy self let out an undignified yelp.

"Seresin, you better not be fucking my dad or I–"

"Your dad?" two voices interrupted the angry growl. One of them was Jake, but who–?

Jake whipped his head to see his very own best friend walking to join them.

"Jake, man, what are you doing here?" Javy asked.

"I was having a lovely nap." He glared at Rooster. "But hold on, back up, what do you mean dad? I thought your dad was…"

Jake and Javy had both seen the picture of LTJG Bradshaw. What he did with that information was not something Jake was proud of, but rest assured he would always remember.

Rooster sighed deeply. "My father, Nick Bradshaw, is dead, yes. My adoptive dad, the man who raised me and who became my legal guardian after my mom died, is sitting on that couch."

They all turned to look at Maverick, who in turn was looking at Rooster with unshed tears in his eyes.

"You– You still want to– Oh, Baby Goose," Maverick whispered, seemingly overcome by emotion.

"Shit," Rooster muttered. "I mean, I– We hadn't talked about it yet but I do–"

Jake wanted to comfort his lover, but Javy pulled him outside to give the other two some "family time".

"Did you know about all that?" Jake asked once they were out of earshot.

"Not exactly, no. Bradley's always been very tight-lipped about his family matters, and now I know why. He didn't really have anyone for a while. I knew he and Maverick knew each other but I didn't know the depth of it. I guess he brought me here today with the purpose of meeting Maverick as his family and not as our teacher."

"Yeah, same. Mav has some pictures of Rooster as a kid in there but I never realized it went that deep. It's not like we're focusing on Bradshaw when there's a P-51 and a bunch of bikes to fix."

".....Yeah, what are you doing here?" Javy narrowed his eyes.

"Learning about planes?" Jake tried.

Javy didn't dignify that with a response.

"We're sort of dating? Less going on actual dates, though, and more like spending every minute together for the past two weeks."

"Oh so you in deep," Javy chuckled.

It was true. Jake didn't give up his privacy like that for anyone. Usually the only person he could stand for that long was his best friend and even that was stretching it.

Javy blew out a breath. "Well, better that you're serious about it and not just fulfilling your threat of fucking Brad's dad."

"I told you, I didn't even know!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Let's go check how they're doing and hope my boyfriend doesn't want to kill you."

Jake squawked, but followed Javy back inside the hangar. If he hid a bit behind his friend's back then that was his business.

Inside they found the father-son duo (the thought still gave Jake whiplash) on the couch, hugging tightly and both looking like they'd been crying. Maverick noticed them approaching, and pulling away from Rooster, he asked Jake, "Sweetheart, did you get enough dinner supplies so they could stay over?"

Jake blushed at the nickname, and he secretly thought hearing it would never get old despite Javy smirking at him knowingly.

"Yeah, sure. I'll go get us some beers and we can talk," he said, eyeing Rooster's direction warily.

This was going to be the weirdest fucking family dinner in history. Beer was needed.

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tagsies (idk who in the hell is the target audience for this but I'll tag usual top gun list): @wildbornsiren @writeforfandoms @marvelousmermaid @lorecraft @a-reader-and-a-writer @callsign-phoenix @blue-aconite @mayhem24-7forever @lt-natrace @luckyladycreator2 @alexxavicry @footprintsinthesxnd @writercole @blowmymbackout

#top gun fic #top gun: maverick #hangmav #brachado #machshaw #cooter #i don't fucking know #i accidentally wrote something #hangman #maverick #rooster #coyote #i still don't know what i'm doing #i did a silly thing

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silviakundera · 4 months

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Empresses in the Palace ep 13

I really like bestie Meizhuang's practicality and no-nonsense style. Too bad she's definitely gonna die (since her name isn't Zhen Huan). Honestly, she and ZH should be the perfect team: ZH is the right amount of paranoid and distrusting, bestie is more pessimistic and calculating. But I think the flaw is, they're too permissive of each other. I mean, they give advice but aren't adamant and demanding about it. If you're really gonna say you're sisters, BE BOSSY ABOUT IT. smh

Tapping in Ling Rong was smart. I never agreed with them not keeping her close.

Poor Fourth Prince. It's both a terrible idea to get associated with a kid the emperor hates... and I wish Zhen Huan could afford to openly care about him. Seems like a good kid.

ZH loosening up when she thinks no one is watching and being playful with her maid is THE SADDEST THING because you are struck that this is the real her. And she has to hide this person at all times and walk a tightrope in the proper concubine act. Even with Meizhuang she is all politeness, isn't so free & easy.

Meet cute with the real Prince Guo. Except this is a horror story, so no such thing. "You must not tell this to anyone. Otherwise, I'll have no burial ground for my body."

I love the old consort. She just straight up leaves the party all, 'I've seen enough drama in my day. Too tired for all this bullshit.'

If she can see it clearly, why can't the emperor? tbh I think he can too. It just doesnt threaten or affect him so he doesn't care.

Hell workplace dinner where everyone is drinking bored, so they've ganged on someone for entertainment. Everyone is salivating at the spectacle of the protagonist embarassing themselves. So of COURSE protagonist will shock everyone with their Secret Special Skills™. It's a very cliche trope but I think most viewers would have to admit that WE LOVE IT. We all eat this shit up with a spoon.

Ep 14

IM SCREAMING. Hua Fei, I pledge fealty. Marry me. "Consort Fleur, what is the matter with you?" Wavering, coughing, making indigestion faces: "I have no greviance over anything. I lost my composure because I was overcome with emotions watching Lady Sourire's performance." The emperor keeps being like, oh REALLY babe but you're basic. When did you start liking poetry? and babygirl puts her whole pussy into it. 👏👏 Girlboss gaslight gatekeep.

ZH really out here eager to co-parent with Meizhuang and ready to rush back from kissing the emperor's ass. I know she legit was into him (why??) at the start but I feel like reality has set in and she's just playing the part now. She's drawing her and Meizhuang's names together with a heart in her Lisa Frank notebook and planning how to spend their golden years together after they pop out a couple kids.

Hua Fei, the light of my life, breaks down the politics of it all. She's very savvy and will be a near impossible opponent to defeat - unless, of course, you have the protagonist halo. or if bro starts losing battles.

Empress pops in to remind us that being the CFO also sucks. Endless, tireless smiling and benevolence. You can't even throw a coquettish tantrum or two for the luz.

The ghost of the empresses's sister that the emperor loved most lingers yet again. Did the empress kill her sister? The thunder & lightening say yes.

The mess with Ling Rong's dad and the pull of Hua Fei's brother great examples of how the harem struggles aren't really about 'a bunch of sad women fighting over a man'. Being in the harem is entering a circle of power and influence. Yes, the concubines aren't supposed to 'discuss state affairs' but that's a rule made to be circumvented. Pleasing the emperor can make him reward your noble family and factions of the harem are connections within powerful noble families. Because Ling Rong is there, even though the emperor doesn't remember her name she has strings to pull. Whether it works out this time for her, it's a recourse she wouldn't have otherwise. And Meizhuang is able to go straight to the emperor's residence and get an update on the situation and counsel from the head eunuch. They have influence and control beyond what other citizens have.

[of course, we can't forget the prize for this hunger games is the biggest of them all -- NO, not some royal dick, but having your kid be the next emperor. Putting your family in the history books forever as part of the dynasty. Potentially changing history.]

[that's why I don't mentally categorise Story of Yanxi Palace as a harem drama. That's the setting, true, but Yingluo enters of her own will and it's due to her revenge quest. She isn't advocating for or protecting her clan and has zero intent to climb the ladder, but is acting in revenge of her sister, then her sworn sister empress, then her bestie. Then she inadvertently falls in love with her frenemy emperor (of all things!) and wants to accompany him, despite her terror of childbirth. She has no interest in the throne for herself, her clan, or her kids. She's playing the game all the wrong way, because she's not playing it at all - her goals aren't aligned to anyone else's. That is the delight of Yanxi Palace; she's dropped into everyone else's harem drama with a metaphorical sword on her back, the unpredictable engine of chaos in this carefully choreographed dance of waxing and waning power & influence.]

Empress really shows off her skills in this episode. No one actually knows how hard she tried for Ling Rong's dad but she has the position to get away with advocating, without losing much. And she gets their gratitude and steers them towards fighting my gf Hua Fei in her stead. Empress was the biggest winner in this incident.

ZH on her way there, as she expertly manipulates the emperor by commenting on state affairs without actually directly discussing them. She's smart to be hiding the depth of her education and only bringing it out when necessary.

Damn she's really playing the "you're my ✨husband✨" card for all it's worth. And we can see that, for now, it's worth a lot.

The maid making the play for the emperor's interest with the lotus blossoms is the Soon to be Evil half-sister, right?

#cdrama #empresses in the palace

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yourmidnightlover · 1 year

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I think personally, my "issue" with xavier (not actually an issue, but why he's just Some Guy to me) is that

1) in the first like, four episodes I couldn't see the difference between him and the other guys (except Tyler because he was never at Nevermore) and I also don't personally find him attractive or interesting except for the whole connection with the Hyde

2) I feel like the writers spent too much time trying to make us (and Wednesday) suspicious of him to actually flesh him out, making him feel like a very shallow and 2D character (with lots of cool potential! there's so much that I wish they'd gone deeper into, instead of trying to make him "dark and mysterious")

3) I didn't really feel the chemistry between Wednesday and him. Like, I think they eventually could be good friends, but I don't feel like there's much there (yet) for them to actually fall for each other

I think, what I would like to see in season two (which I know I'm never gonna get) is a deeper delve into his history with Wednesday, and his connection with the Hyde and then I want him and Tyler to kiss

Like, he had so much potential, and it sucks that he didn't live up to all he could be

(also this is not meant as an attack or hate, just offering my own pov)

i completely understand that! what personality traits he had weren’t very progressed with what screen time they gave him.

and i guess they did spend the majority of the time trying to make him seem suspicious, since it is from wednesday’s pov.

i think there are a lot of possibilities with what we know about him. ie his dad, where’s his mom?, the hyde connection thing, the development of his powers, and probably more i can’t think of rn.

they definitely weren’t focused on him at all in the season, which is fair bc wednesday had to use tyler for transportation and everything and then developed feelings.

i just hope they go deeper with what he’s capable of. ALSO i want to see this little flashback scene of him and wednesday when they were kids. i feel like that’s so cute y’know!

my point is just that people said he had like nothing going on, when he did, it just wasn’t all brought to light or discussed in depth imo :)

(don’t worry i didn’t take it as such, this is simply a mature conversation about a fictional character :)

#xavier thorpe thoughts #xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe fic #xavier thorpe fanfiction #wednesday thoughts #wednesday #wednesday fanfiction

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sieglinde-freud · 5 months

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https://www . tumblr.com/sieglinde-freud/730406784151470080/but-what-if-the-entire-lucina-gang-were-sent-to

consider: the new second gen from this happening (aka soleil and ophelia get to have more friends)

okay so i have thought about this before not necessarily in the context of nohr/the fates universe (intsys… give the continent a name please… i cant keep saying fateslandia i really cant) but like im down to take that angle, though i do dislike the whole deeprealm thing we can just… ignore it. maybe. i dont know i think im j gonna word vomit this so maybe i’ll decide halfway through how i feel about that ok lotta thoughts under cut

whenever i liked to think about the awakening second gen having kids (awakening third gen?) it’s kinda hard because i honestly… i dont think a lot of them would? at least not in the state that theyre in once we as players finish awakening. inigo owain and severa get to grow AFTER awakening and we see that, so the case for them is easy. but we dont know what direction everyone goes, so this is a lot of my own interpretations of the characters, so im not gonna make up a concept for all of them. but if you want me to give my thoughts on someone specific i didnt get to here thats totally cool but. on its own this is already gonna be long. i can feel it.

so first is gerome and i dont have like full oc descriptions for any of these kids i just have like ideas of what they could be, and i think with gerome, like realistically in terms of what i think intelligent systems would do given how popular batman is in japan is turn geromes kid into like a robin sidekick kinda guy. but then that gets thrown out the window because percy exists. arthur/gerome realness. but since i cant just steal percy from arthur and call him geromes son, i think a good concept for that would be to have a kid whos very affectionate and like. i think im gonna say itd be a daughter. i think she’d want to be a daddy’s girl kind of like how severa is in her dad supports, but gerome is still in his own shit about raaahh my parents left me and now i have attachment issues the likes of which you wouldn’t believe raaahhh and is REALLY bad about engaging in meaningful interactions with her? gonna use deeprealms actually because if you disregard how absolutely fucking nonsensical it is it brings in some interesting dynamics. anyways so gerome is the type of idiot to do things like purposefully avoid spending time with people to not get attached so hes not sad when they die and i think thats kind of what would go on here? except this time its his daughter and this time he locked her in a pocket dimension for all of her formative years and probably didnt visit her! i hate to paint gerome in a bad light like i really do i love him so very much but i think his inability to reach out would really hit him hard here realistically speaking! and so then their support conversations would be her trying to reach out and slowly getting through to him, forcing him to self reflect on the fact that he neglected his own child for years just because he was scared. and that sucks but i think it would be important for him and a good way to complete his arc that was set up in awakening that he couldnt ever really finish because of the way the support system works

realistically yarne would aim to have like thirty kids but im not conceptualizing THIRTY KIDS but i think his dynamic with this child would be like velouria and keaton but the other way around with yarne being the overly affectionate and doting one whereas the kids j kinda like …okayyy??? but could obviously see yarnes good intentions and relief that. you know. he has a kid! hes safe! i think when it comes to laslow and odin having kids, those supports were more used to further THEIR development, which is what i went for with gerome, but when it comes to yarne i feel like something that could be interesting to tackle with his kid is their identity with being 1/4 taguel and like. idk. wanting to be proud of a culture that doesnt exist? show off their heritage to world thats never heard of it? deal with the fact that while they may pass on the taguel blood like this, itll eventually wither out just due to genetics? maybe his kid wouldn’t be able to transform fully into a rabbit (probably not true since i think corrins kids would all be 1/4 dragon right. bc corrins only half? but whatever maybe the taguel are different) and itd fuck with their sense of self. not sure exactly what direction this would take but i think it could be a fun way of discussing being biracial in a way like this (albeit heavily fantasized because. fantasy game)

severas a bit weird because while yes shes already in fates and yes caeldori might be hinted at being her canon daughter (which i dislike the concept of a lot! as nice as the interactions are) its not ACTUALLY canon and i think she deserves a kid thats specifically her own and ive made a post about this before but i feel like severas issues with her mom is something that she clearly isnt over by the time of fates no matter how her support with cordelia goes. and the perspective that odin and laslow get from being parents in that they learn what their parents went through in protecting and ultimately dying for them would be SO insanely valuable for selena!! she thinks cordelia died for chrom! and while its true we’ll never know how bad timeline cordelia felt and our cordelia is clearly very different, i dont think thats true. severa just needs to see that and i dont think a cordelia look alike is the way to do that. severa strikes me as woman with a son vibes anyways. i think in the same way soleil and ophelia ramp up their dad’s traits, her son would do something similar and just be wayyy tsundere about everything to the point where not even severa can do anything about it. i think it could be funny, but itd also put her right in her moms shoes back in their support conversation, trying to get through to a child whos convinced you dont love them as much as they love you (maybe he’d be pissed off about the deeprealm thing. i think thats a good angle) and she buys his time with sweets and dessert the same way because as much as it pisses her off, hes just like her and she knows what works! now she just has to make sure he doesnt continue to grow up like how she did

theres this part of cynthias character thats very subtle thats shown in her dad support and its at the very end and if you notice at the end of that support there is… no resolution. cynthia hugs her dad, says its okay that she knows she’ll never be his real daughter and he’ll never be her real dad, and then it ends. compare to someone like inigo’s father or lucina’s mother support where they emphasize hey!! youre my kid too! and i think that’s a fun way to take cynthias development in the future because she just… doesnt get that. FOR SOME REASON????? so i think cynthia in fates could deal a little bit with putting that behind her and learning to deal with that in this new world because i think its obvious she doesnt WANT to part from her parents, she just feels like she has to. and i think this could come through when she has a kid of her own. i think she’d actually be a pretty fucking good parent, deeprealms aside, trying to maintain this bond with them and reassure them that she isnt going anywhere because i think thats what cynthia herself always needed to hear. i dont think there’d be too much conflict here, but i think it could be a decent way to finish cynthia’s character arc and let her give herself the closure she was looking for even if she didnt know she was.

and this is long as fuck and late as fuck!!! sorry. though if you saw the last ask (or if this is the same anon. hi 👋) you probably saw that coming.

#long post #LOOONGGGGG POST #asks #i mightve lost the point focusing more on the awakening kids rather than the hypothetical ones but #but its a lot easier for me to talk about an established character rather than one that doesnt even have a name #and only is barely conceptualized in my own head #so sorry about that!!!!#but uh. lol. awakening kids. did i ever mention i was normal about them? bc i am. my eye is not twitching #ALSO I KNOW I GOT TO THIS LATE BUT IT WAS FASTER THAN THE OTHER ONE SO #HA

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slaying-strong · 1 year

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I am having a hard time putting my thoughts into words. I feel so alone. I feel like everyone and everything around me is moving and I am stuck. My dad is the first thing I think about when I wake up, and the last thing on my mind before I close my eyes to sleep. I can't believe he has been gone for a month. It was a month on Monday (the 23rd) and I wasn't able to make it through the work day. I had to leave early, but that's really okay. I don't know why I felt so guilty for it.

Grief is weird, and has been manifesting in some unhelpful ways. I feel like very few people my age understand me right now and what I am going through. I feel like there is such an expectation to continue chugging on, but how can I do that when I have this huge hole in my heart? I am not the same person I was a month ago.

I am not the same person I was almost four months ago now when my dad was first diagnosed.

I feel so so angry. When I first started this blog, I don't think that I spoke much about my relationship with my dad at the time. My dad was always exactly who I needed him to be when I was younger. My parents got divorced before I turned one. I never knew anything different and was totally okay with the set up. I used to see my dad regularly and then more sporadically when he moved a bit further away to a beach town (which I would spend weeks at a time at his place during the summer). When I wasn't seeing my dad, he was calling regularly and did this very dad thing where the conversation (after at least an hour) would come to a lull, and instead of wrapping up, he would start talking about the weather just so he wouldn't have to let me go. I really loved that about him.

When I graduated high school, my dad went through some life events (a separation from my step mom) and his mental health tanked and he stopped talking to literally everyone except for my brother who had moved out with him. We didn't speak for about 2-3 years. When I would see him at a family function (if he even attended), things felt like no time had passed and like we hadn't gone x amount of time without talking. It was in those small moments that I wanted nothing more for things to go back to normal. If we all forgave him for his absence, why couldn't he forgive himself?

I have a whole new perspective of this situation A. as an adult and B. as someone who has gained a lot more insight into his mental health after his passing. I have (and still have) so much empathy for all of the weight ad sadness he carried around and how poorly he dealt with it and just want to give him a big hug.

We mended our relationship over the last few years and things were at its best for about the last year and a half. I just can't help but think and feel how unfair it is for his time to be cut short when things were finally looking up: our relationship was the best it had been in years, his granddaughter was turning one, he was ready to retire and enjoy his later years (or at least work part time - because sitting still is hard and boring!). I feel so angry for him in the sense that he worked his entire life, like really busted his ass to give us the best life we could have and he didn't even get to enjoy a retirement. I am so angry and sad for the bucket list he created after getting diagnosed and not being able to check off any boxes because how sick chemo made him and how advanced and aggressive his cancer was. It all just feels so unfair.

I don't have a beautiful way to sum this up. I just miss him so much. This fucking sucks.

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the-owl-tree · 1 year

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Aster and/or bluebell?

Aster: Who’s your least favorite character? Why?

im stealing straight from here except just uh elaborating lol

Crowfeather sucks like on a whole other level oh my god his angst is boring and contrived, they killed off Feathertail to justify his shitty angst, and his ""romance"" with Leafpool sucks if you read it straight. Then we spend an entire arc watching him be a shit father, be a shitty ex to Leafpool, and be a shitty husband to Nightcloud only for the books to turn around and say nope! it's the woman's fault not the shitty dad! Crowfeather's trial further cements what a fucking shit character he is by having his development come from his dead mommy having to come down and tell him to make an effort. There's something so infuriating about him being promoted to Deputy while Leafpool went on trial for doing what was asked of her. I hope he dies!

Bramblestar is pretty obvious, he does shitty things and the narrative rewards him. He's allowed to be controlling, abusive, corrupt, distant, and cruel because the author's like him. It sucks! Hope he dies!

Clear Sky and Gray Wing are irritating protagonists and i do not understand why people tote them around as "complex characters." Clear Sky's motivations are weak, cliche, and nothing new to the franchise and his half-hearted redemption only for him to slip back to being a dick whenever the books call for it makes me wish they just stuck to him being a major antagonist. Gray Wing is shitty to those around him, rarely takes action against his brother, and all around sucks. dotc sucks, thank you.

Sandgorse is a shitty dad who, for some reason, gets to be honorable after death?? because he saved someone???? remember! icing out your kid for not doing everything you want and expect of them regardless of their own personal desires is okay if you dont leave someone to die! idk, i just can't help but compare him and Rainflower, like one is played straight as an antagonist/generally shitty parent (not arguing otherwise) while the other is shitty but it never gets called into question.

Nightheart's writing relies entirely on you closing your eyes to everything pertaining his arc. It's weak, shitty writing and his character shows off just how little the Erin's give a fuck about tackling the sexism within the text. His motivations are weak, his "conflict" relies on others being written completely out of character to work, and he has to change entirely when around Sunbeam lest the Erin's actually have to work to make a relationship actually work.

for other characters that i dont like but don't nearly have as much uhh anger towards thistleclaw for not being more interesting, rowanstar for not being russetfur, lionblaze for sure he's continuously violent and aggressive towards others without actual consequences, aannnd (if my oots doesnt go well) maybe ivypool

Bluebell: Do you ship any rare-pairs?

i wont lie after reading tigerheart's shadow AND thinking about an offensive eternity....you kind of got me intrigued by darktail/spiresight

idk how rare some of these are but lionberry, leafnight, willowholly, aanndd heatherholly

i dont have any actual rare ones simply because i do not remember anything at all at any time

#warrior cats #deer rambles #sorry i saw a chance to get angry about cats and had to take it #you will not get one cat you will get a handful of these things #the sandgorse and rainflower comparison is always on the back of my mind when i think of tallstar's se #like huh! i wonder why is constantly played as a villain and the other gets to be honorable in the end!

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quinnsqueries · 2 years

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Why Everyone Should Read "A Mango Shaped Space"

Wendy Mass was the first author I ever truly loved. Believe it or not, it took me until the ripe age of ten years old to truly love reading. And I remember the first book that actually got me hooked, and no it wasn't Mango, it was, however, by Wendy Mass. And, in classic little kid style, it was part of a series of books and I read them backwards.

And, I really just want to congratulate Wendy Mass on her writing abilities. She made me laugh, squeal and cry in one whole night. Three hours, to be exact, as that is how long it took me to read the whole book. And, well, it'd been a long time since I read it, so I didn't remember too much about the book, and what I did remember was the most tragic event in the book, the premise, and that the main character saw her grandfather in her kitten.

And, well, even though I knew what happened, I knew the tragic event was, well, tragic...it still didn't prepare me for it enough because I sobbed like a baby when it happened. I don't want to say what happened because, spoilers, but like, jesus christ, I cried. And I don't do that very often with books these days.

Anyway, I really recommend reading A Mango Shaped Space if you haven't, because I saw myself in the main character. Now, I don't have synesthesia, but I still saw myself in Mia, and maybe you will too. If you don't want spoilers for the book, then I suggest you stop reading here. If you don't mind it, if you need more convincing, then read along!

My first though when rereading this book was: Wow, Mia, you and I are so alike, I can't do math either. My second thought was, wow, Mia has anxiety. The opening scene is our protagonist, Mia, trying to solve a math problem and failing. She's never been good at math and she says it's because of the colors she sees and how it just doesn't work correctly when she tries to do math.

Mia was in front of the class trying to solve a math problem, and since she's not good at math, she's trying to stall for time, so she attempts to solve the problem while putting all the numbers in the "correct" color. Except, other people don't see the world as colorfully as Mia, and this ends up with her in the principals office realizing that maybe she's different and that it's not a good thing. This ultimately ends up with Mia trying to hide how different she is.

Now let's pause here for a moment. This scene not only builds up the entire plot of the book, but also reminds me of a lot of different things. Whenever someone thinks there might be something wrong with them, it can often be overlooked. With Mia it was her synesthesia, but with other people it can be so many different things. Autism, ADHD, depression...

I think this book is coded for neurodivergency, whether Wendy Mass meant it or not, and honestly, that means so much for me. And I'll further explain why I felt that way as I reveal more of the story, but for now, just trust me on this one.

The next scene sets up Mia's life as it currently is. We meet her best friend Jenna, her mom and dad, and her little brother Zack. And let me tell you: this family is weird and I love it. Wendy Mass built the characters so realistically, she legit brought them to life. Her little brother is obsessed with superstitions and has kept track of every single McDonalds burger he's ever eaten. Her older sister basically never touched grass in her life and then spends a summer in California and is obsessed with all of these nature-y spirity things. Her mom is very clean and horrible with dealing with emotions. She used to be a science teacher and loves astronomy. Her dad is the more sensitive parent (which like? Hello! We never get that!) He's constantly building and expanding their house, which is something he'd battle with his dad against until he died. He flies a hellicopter!

And then there's Mia. Who, like me, sucks at math, is okay with english and history, and is super artistic. She gets overwhelmed by a lot of noise, which the first time we see this happen, is when her brother turns up all of her clocks so when it strikes 5pm they'll all go off. It's super loud and overwhelming and Mia can't see straight. I get that way too, and the way Wendy Mass writes is super relatable.

If I had been prepared, I would have been able to anticipate the onslaught, but now it is overwhelming and I feel like I'm suffocating.

I get this way too! When things are too loud, if there's too many people around me, etc, I can't breathe, which Mass depicts, too. Mia has to crouch on the floor just so she can breathe. And then when the noise goes away, which causes the colors to go away, she can breathe again. This is a realistic depiction of anxiety, and while this is due to Mia's synesthesia, I think a lot of people can relate to how Mia is feeling in this moment.

Mia is then, understandably, afraid of hearing too many sounds, but when she takes control of the noise, like putting on music, then she's perfectly fine with it. Here's another quote from the book which just resonated with me.

All of them, belonging, at that minute, only to me.

This quote is in relation to the colors, but really just accurately depicts how when we have control of things, you really just feel at peace. And since it's preceded by such a powerful scene of feeling out of control, I think this sentence is just kinda perfect.

Another powerful scene is when Mia meets another kid like her. His name is Billy and he's five years old. Mia meets him at a supermarket and at first she doesn't realize that he's like him, but when she's does she's shocked. And, reasonably, scared and confused. This pushes the plot forward, and the next big scene is Mia coming clean to her parents. But first, just another quote that made me scream.

These visits are hard for her, no matter what she says. Or doesn't say. I hurry back to the house thinking of all the things we keep from other people. Even our best friends.

This quote sums up so much of the book, and it comes so early on. Mia's been keeping her synesthesia to herself for years, and it causes so many problems. It makes her feel isolated, which in turn, when she finds out that there are other people like her, makes her go crazy. She hyperfixates and loses track of whats right in front of her. Wendy Mass depicts what life is all about, depicts something that can really happen to anyone, depending on how isolated they feel. And it doesn't have to just be with synesthesia, it can be with anything! And that is what I loved about this book more.

If you haven't been convinced to keep reading, well...we're only on page 50.

So, like I said, the next big scene is Mia telling her parents that she has synesthesia, though she doesn't yet know the name for her condition. Beforehand, she's talking about why certain things, like math and languages are hard for her, because, no matter what she tries, they don't make sense.

When she tells her parents about the colors, they reasonably freak out. They argue back and forth about how it's their fault she's this way, the mom tries reason it with Mia having just memorized the colors because of the blocks she played with as a kid, and then they decide to set up a doctors appointment. All they want to do is fix Mia.

Also, I just want to point out, at this point, that even insignificant characters, like the history teacher in this book have such stunning quirks. The history teacher is a germaphobe and when Mia gets called down to be picked up, she doesn't know what it's for and her instant reaction is "did I put my history homework in the wrong pile?"

And, if I haven't given you enough quotes, heres another one that resonates with me.

At that point I would rather have been called anything but crazy. It's one thing for me to call myself crazy. It is another thing entirely when a doctor does it.

At this point in the book Mia has been referred to a therapist, or that's at least what they call her. Who, by the way, assumes Mia's making this up. And Mia thinks that because she's been referred to a therapist the doctor is calling her crazy, which, I don't entirely think he was. He just wasn't sure what to do about her condition since he doesn't specialize in that field.

Anything, the next thing we know, Mia tells her best friend about synesthesia and she gets upset. Previously in the book we learned Jenna's mom died when she was young and it had such an impact on her, which is why she's scared that Mia had been hiding such a big part of her life from her. She doesn't understand what is going on with Mia, and she seems like she might be sick at this point in the book, since nobody knows what synesthesia is. So, they have a fight because Jenna is scared that her best friend might die, even if she doesn't say it out loud, we can tell.

Mia then meets the therapist and gets referred to a neurologist, who, when Mia and her mom meet in person, then tells her what synesthesia is, since he specializes in it. He then says they can meet again sometime, sends Mia off with a website, and she's reasonably happy. She then spends the later half of the book hyper fixating on her new terminology, learning more about synesthesia, and making a new friend through the website. All the while ignoring what she has in real life. She distances herself from Jenna, who she finally made up with, and the rest of her friends. She ignores her schoolwork, and even does acupuncture because she read online that it really brings out her colors.

Now, at this point, I think it's only fair to bring up the cat, Mango. The namesake of the book. Mia first met Mango after her grandfather died, and she reminded her of him because they had the same eyes. She believes a part of her grandfather lives on through Mango, which softened her grandfathers death. But, the thing is, Mango, despite being fairly young, is dying, which is hinted at through the book. Mango has a lung condition and takes medicine for it.

During a meetup of people with synesthesia Mia has her first kiss and it's the best night of her life. And then, once she gets home, she realizes that Mango is missing. He'd gotten trapped outside. Mia brings him inside but something isn't right. Mango is dying and the roads are flooded. They try to take him to the vet via helicopter, but he dies on the way. And Mia is blaming herself for it. She thinks she hadn't been paying enough attention to Mango, and because of that he died.

My eyes open wide, and the pain hits me in thick black waves. Then I scream loud enough to wake the dead. Only it doesn't.

This quote was what made the tear-gates flood. Mia is grieving and hard. And during the next couple of chapters there are so many raw quotes, things like "I wish the ice would go right through me and take the pain away." Because Mia just lost her best friend, and she doesn't know how to cope. And also, her colors are gone, because it's a traumatic experience and apparently that happens.

And, also, it's Jenna's birthday party that day, and Mia just feels stuck in bed. And Jenna is blaming the synesthesia get-together for Mia being absent to being early for setting up. This gets resolved quickly by Mia's mom calling Jenna and explaining that Mango died, but this further shows us that Mia really had been neglecting everything in favor of researching/being hyper-fixated on her diagnosis. On her explanation of why she is the way she is.

The book then comes to a close with Mia finding Billy, whom she had been searching for in hopes of helping him and his family learn more about who he is and what he has, and with Mia reconnecting with her loved ones. And really, they ended it even softer with finding Mango's children, because he'd been courting another cat. Jenna's cat.

And well, I just really loved this book. So, please, please read it and tell me your thoughts. Did you also find that it's coded in nuerodivergency and other mental health issues?

#wendy mass #a mango shaped space #book recommendations #reading recommendations #nuerodiversity #synesthesia

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amarantine-amirite · 1 year

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The Road Home

Dad boarded the driver's seat of our brown LeBaron with wood panels. It shook slightly under his weight. He slammed the door, started the car, and backed out of the parking lot of the park where I had the soccer tournament.

It's a sunny day. The forests at the side of the road are beautiful. Today had all the trappings of a nice drive. And yet I still ended up in tears by the time we got home.

It started with my parents arguing in the car, while me and my little sister Erin sat in the backseat.

Dad didn't look at me when he said, "Well Jane, you played like shit. Eight goals? Really?" nobody could tell if he did so to keep his eyes on the road or because he was too mad to look at me.

"Arthur, don't go there," Mom warned.

Dad went there anyway. "No, Dorothy," he snipped, "she played like shit."

"Arthur, It takes a whole team to play soccer" Mom responded in an attempt to get him to lay off.

It didn't work. Dad just kept after me, "You don't get it, Dorothy. Jane's never going to be good at soccer if she doesn't learn from her mistakes."

Dad has never played a single game of soccer in his life, yet he thinks he could do a better job. He doesn't know what we go through.

It's different for girls. We sit out if we're on our periods because they don't make shorts in colours other than white. We can't wear our own bras, not even underneath the ones that come with the uniform. We always fall because the boys who get first dibs tear up our turf. We injure our knees and ankles because our shoes don't fit right.

I have it even harder. We play our games with a bowling ball painted like a soccer ball and our coach tells us we have trouble kicking because we aren't very strong. Most of my teammates genuinely believe that they can't kick a soccer ball. I know it's a bowling ball, and it frustrates me to no end that everyone pretends it's a soccer ball. In an environment like this, I don't think anybody could be good at soccer.

Dad turned around and glared at me. "Jane. you tell me what you did wrong!" he demanded

"I don't remember," I said, trying not to piss myself in fright.

Dad relented. "No, you do remember, you just don't want to think about it," he growled.

The car would have gone silent after that, except Erin had the guts to say, "Why does it matter, Jane's never going to be good at soccer. Can't we just do what Mom says and take the bike everywhere, because we wouldn't need soccer if we rode our bikes and-"

She had a point. I sucked at soccer and hated playing it. I never understood why I had to play a team sport when I could've gotten exercise some other way. We live somewhere where we can get to places by bike and stay off the roads at the same time. We didn't have to be a take-the-car-to-sports-for-exercise family.

Regardless, my sister's comment made Dad launch into a white-hot tirade. "Listen, girls," he began, "but nobody is going to teach you this. People on bikes are a disaster for the economy. They don't buy cars or fuel and don't borrow money. They don't pay insurance policies and they don't pay to have the car serviced, nor do they need repairs. They don't use paid parking or cause any major accidents. With people on bikes, there's no need for multi-lane highways."

He's not wrong, but people on bikes buy other stuff too, such as water bottles, gears, bike repairs, and bike trolleys. The spending doesn't go away, it just gets transformed into something else.

Dad angrily ranted on. "Not done!" he continued, "people on bikes don't get fat. Healthy people are not necessary or useful to the economy. They don't buy medicine. They do not go to hospitals or doctors. They add nothing to the country's GDP."

I burst out laughing. Dad's tirade sounds wrong on multiple levels, but I can't pinpoint the flaws in the argument. Even if I could, it wouldn't have stopped him. "On the contrary, each new McDonald's store creates 30 jobs. 10 cardiologists, 10 dentists, 10 dietitians, and nutritionists, as well as the people who work in the store itself."

Before either Mom or Erin could say something, Dad bellowed, "And walking is even worse. Pedestrians don't even buy a bicycle!"

"Yes," Mom said in a vain attempt to put an end to Dad's psychotic rant, "but they buy shoes. And sunscreen."

Without warning, my father hauled off and maneuvered the car to crash us all into the dividing wall. He wanted all of us to die together. The reverberating echoes of my mother and sister screaming and me crying haunt me to this day.

We got home in one piece. Mom and Dad forgot about the drive home within an hour of arriving home, and Erin forgot about it in a couple of days. I never will. To this day, I panic if I'm in a car with someone and they seem even slightly upset, especially if on the freeway near a dividing wall.

#writing #writers #writers on tumblr #short fiction #short story #hauntedearth

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dorky-zuko · 1 year

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Plz share your thoughts on the Mass Effect Endings (Both from a Watsonian perspective of "which ending choice is the best" and from a Doylist perspective of "were any of those endings a good way to end the trilogy?")

Look, you asked for it.

When the third game first came out and I reached the ending, I immediately shot the glowy kid because I thought he sucked, and then when nothing happened I decided to blow up the Reapers. Apologies to my new friends The Geth and the lovely EDI, but I’m hittin’ destroy every time lol. My dad, Captain Admiral Keith David Anderson, told me to do it.

After the DLC update however, now when you shoot starkid he gets real pissy and throws a tantrum, locking you into what is simultaneously the worst and best ending. The refuse ending is interesting to me because it really is the developers saying, okay, you didn’t like our endings, huh? Well here’s one where everyone dies instead, happy now??? And like, yeah! Even though everyone dies and the content is significantly, significantly truncated, at least it’s a real ending? At least it makes sense?

All three crucible endings are terrible because, let’s face it, the crucible suxs. From your Doylist perspective, it was dead on arrival, a dud the moment it was introduced into the plot on Mars. Really, all the crucible endings are bad because the whole set-up for ME3 is bad. It turns Mass Effect into a story about building a magic machine to make all your problems go away. No matter how the crucible ended up working it was never going to be narratively satisfying, because it’s just an enormous machine that beats the Reapers for you.

When you spend 2/3rds of your story writing your characters into a box, it’s bad form to start act three by handing them a box cutter.

So if the crucible sucking is the one of the one, two punch that is ME3’s terrible ending, the second punch is surely that we’re going into this game with the goal of explaining the Reapers. This gets even worse when you consider what they add in Leviathan, but even without that, making the Reapers a force with whom Shepard can discuss both the nature of life and the Reaper’s plan in relation to it at the end of the game is just pathetic. Both for Shepard AND for the Reapers.

When Sovergin says “You exist because we allow it, and you will end because we demand it,” that’s all I need from the Reapers. When he says “rudimentary creatures of blood and flesh, you touch my mind, fumbling in ignorance,” THAT’S ALL I NEED FROM THE REAPERS. When he says “there is a realm of existence so far beyond your own you cannot even imagine it”

That’s it, baybee. That’s the whole thing.

I don’t need the Reapers to be any more scrutable to me than an 8 year old child is to the ants that live in his ant farm. They work all day, living their little ant lives, toiling in obscurity, oblivious to the fact that the giant beyond the glass is even alive in the same way that they are. Oblivious to the fact that they are utterly at his mercy. And then one day he turns 9, and decides he’s too old to have an ant farm any more, so his parents come in with the pesticide, and then later they tell him the ants went to a farm upstate. The ants live and die, they build a civilization only to watch it fall, and the whole time they are utterly unaware of the factors that motivate the beings that control every part of their entire universe.

That’s the Reapers. Eternal and unknowable. Alive in a way organic beings can barely understand, motivated by forces that defy our every way of thinking.

Except of course, it’s not. The Reapers were built by the space squids who still, miraculously, live at 2181 Despoina Drive. They have incredibly simple motivations that can be explained in a single conversation. They want to pull a John Conner and stop the Terminator future, so every once in a while they come kill all organics before synthetics can do it first, even though if you’re not a loser you already made peace between the Geth and Quarians so their entire point is entirely refuted before the starkid has even started explaining it to you. Glowboy says "synthetics will always end up destroying organics," and Shepard is like, "my ship’s AI is alive, and I can't get her to stop boning my pilot. The only 'destroying' of organics she's wants to do is pulverizing Jeff's brittle-bone-disease pelvis!" Everything the starkid says about organics and synthetics being incompatible instantly rings hollow the moment he says it, and that's the entire basis for what the Reapers have been doing for like a hundred million years. It’s just so weak.

And then this weak ass kid who has given you no reason to believe he has any idea what he’s talking about gives you three options, none of which makes any sense. Grab these exposed wires and you’ll turn into a big blue reaper? Jump into this hole to give everyone in the galaxy magic green cyber eyes? Shoot this machine until it blows up nice and red hot, which is somehow the intended way to turn it on???

Why would I, or my Shepard, want to do any of these three things? All I want to do is shoot the starchild. He’s literally in charge of the Reapers, the bad guys who have been killing everybody for three games now. He seems chill with whichever crucible ending you pick, only becoming upset if you pick the refusal ending. Which is good, I hate him and I want him to be upset.

Look, if you wanted me to say which color ending is best, like I said at the start, it’s red. Illusive Man wanted to do blue, and he’s a chump, so I’m not picking blue. And I don’t really believe in green, it sounds too much like made-up space magic, and I’m not a hippy. I like EDI and the Geth, I really do, but the Reapies gotta go, my dudes. I’m sorry to all the robots out there, y’all we’re the real ones.

So yeah, the endings all suck individually and they also all suck collectively. Mass Effect 3 succeeds in a lot of ways, it has the best set pieces of the trilogy (2 has the best characters and 1 has the best narrative) and it has lots and lots of amazing payoff for narrative beats that have been set up throughout all three of the games. But the Reapers aren’t one of them. Best to just play Citadel DLC and end things after the party, pretend the writers decided to keep the ending ambiguous. That Shepard, they always keep you guessing. How are they gonna get outta this one? I guess we’ll never know.

#mass effect #ending discourse #what is it 2013 in here?#dorky zuko post #Remember the indoctrination theory?#shit was WILD

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steamishot · 2 years

Text

one month in

it’s one month into the attendinghood life, except this previous night shift week kinda sucked. during night shifts, they have to work the entire 12 hour shift for all 7 nights and there are no other hospitalists to take turns staying the whole shift with. this was the most days matt had to work straight for nights (compared to 6 nights in a row in residency), he now has an hour total commute, and he wasn’t able to sleep well during the day. his boss had also scheduled him to work (for free! to “make up time”) wednesday and thursday on his off week. it was barely any recovering due to having “jet lag” and extra work. today he was supposed to start an easier shift. however, the director messaged him yesterday asking if he can switch with a pregnant hospitalist so that she can manage the easier floor. i’m feeling dissatisfied about the schedule these past two weeks, as it gives me very residency vibes lol. even as an attending, there’s seniority and it seems to be understood that the easier shifts should go to the more senior doctor.

anyway, i was also probably too free with my time. i’m excited to restart my accounting program on november 1st. i briefly skimmed the book happier hour. the gist was saying that the relationship between happiness and time is a bell curve. someone who has too little time ~<2 hours per day to themselves is generally unhappy, as someone who has too much time to themselves as ~>5 are also generally unhappy. i fall into the latter category and i’m trying to fix that.

classpass has been great. i get a discount as a member of kaiser. so far i’ve been using it for hot yoga (only 6 minute walk to the studio) and barre with T. as one of my vices here is online shopping, i’ve been buying stuff for my active lifestyle. for example, i just got myself hiking shoes, i’ve been using old running shoes all this time. got a hand towel for hot yoga. these classes, along with meetup, help me feel more like i have a community and satisfies my need to be in a “people/team environment”.

benefits: matt finally signed up for his benefits, i felt some more security in our relationship when he listed me as a beneficiary lol. i purchased a couple metro passes using his pre-tax dollars. he’s requested reimbursements for all the medical licensing/exams and such which will be a total of about ~$5k. aaaand we finally have his first full month’s paycheck to look forward to at the beginning of november so we will slowly feel less poor. finally seeing some fruition to the hard work? looking forward to having more guilt-free spending money.

mid-november, we have planned a 4-5 day trip in montreal. late november, we are flying back to LA. december is TBD/most likely somewhere in europe. matt booked a staycation at equinox for my birthday in january. i found out that germany and the countries around that area are ideal for me to travel to to “work from home” where i can travel during the day and work at night. let’s see how our lives unfold in the coming year.

i bought a ticket to cambodia for my dad using points. he’s visiting from oct 4 - nov 5. he really wanted business class tickets, but i wasn’t able to make it happen this time because it was too short notice. i did however, make him an authorized user to my venture x which gives him free membership to priority pass. he was really happy to use this in taipei for the layover. i did not expect however, that he was gonna fly to thailand as well. he was able to use the lounge access there too (without my help, smart man)! he checked into a fancy lounge in bangkok and brought my cousin there too. my mom told me that he didn’t know if it charged him, and if they did they would just charge me LOL. it makes me happy to help my dad flex. that in his 60s he can finally experience some more luxurious travels.

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unpretty · 3 years

Text

god i just remembered the funniest thing i did as a Teen which was went to see a midnight show of indiana jones at the cheap seats with a different friend than the one i usually went to midnight shows with. and i had my dad drop me off and i was like “yeah it’s fine she’ll drive me home” because i just assumed we’d go to denny’s and hang out and smoke afterward and then i’d go home after we’d been out until 4am being delinquents. EXCEPT she actually came with a whole bunch of other friends that i didn’t know and they were stoned out of their minds. so when the time came to pile in this strange stoned teenage boy’s pickup with like four more people than could safely fit i was like “hm. no thank you.”

so i call my dad but after three different times he still hasn’t picked up and i’m like. okay. clearly my dad is out like a fucking rock. and i told him that i would be fine and i wasn’t being irresponsible. and if i do finally wake him up there’s going to be a whole lecture about responsibility and also probably the fact that i still haven’t learned how to drive, and what would i do if he wasn’t around to save my ass. well, that’s stupid. i know exactly what i would do. i would walk. so i’ll just fucking walk.

for reference, here is my best approximation of the outfit i was wearing at that time

except also add a leather jacket that was way too big for me with pockets big enough to smuggle an extra-large can of monster into a movie theater. i made a lot of good choices.

i had a notoriously bad sense of direction and a flip phone (my dad offered to buy me an iphone when they came out but they couldn’t play flac so i wasn’t interested, like i said, good choices) but also one time a friend and i had ditched school to take the bus to the mall, so i had a vague understanding of where bus stops were. so like a genius, i went to the bus stop and looked at the map to try and figure out how to get home. except the map wasn’t really very good and i got turned around a lot and long story short after spending an hour going in circles in a suburb i decided to just go the way i recognized, which was the freeway. did i mention this was southern california? literally nothing is designed for walking in southern california because cars have air conditioning.

so like five miles in there’s this exit, and the thing is, my mom’s house is like. right there. it’s right off the exit. i can practically see it. so if i walk to mom’s house i’ll be done in no time. except!! if i do that!!! then it will be OBVIOUS that something has happened because i’ll have to knock until mom lets me in and she’ll be like “why are you here” and “where are your friends” and dad will be like “why did you go to your mom’s house when your computer is over here”. and at this point i’m still thinking: no one will ever know. i am going to fix this problem, all on my own, to prove a point about how i can handle my own shit.

which is why i walked another five miles to get to my dad’s house.

you’d think at some point someone would have asked why the fuck i was on the freeway but no one actually offered me a ride until i was literally almost home, at which point it was like, yeah, no, i’m good. at one point i fell in a ditch and cracked the shit out of my phone’s screen. my feet got totally wrecked but i just kept thinking “in olden dayes people probably did shit like this all the time. it’s not even that far. i need to suck it up and stop being such a huge baby.”

by the time i got home the sun was up. and the worst part was that when i woke up at like noon i could barely walk so i had to explain to my dad what happened to be sure that no one would expect me to walk anywhere. he was horrified. there was literally no reason for me to do that. i could have kept calling. i could have just called a cab and gotten the money out of his wallet. there were so many options that did not involve just walking home. he had been so worried when he saw the missed calls and so relieved when he saw that i was in bed only to circle back around to wondering where it all went wrong.

EXCEPT i did not tell him i walked along the freeway. i was like “no, i went the other way”. later we drove around and he was like “was this the way you went” and i was like “yes definitely”. i don’t think i ever told him about the freeway thing. i’m 31 now and i still can’t drive.

#original

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maybege · 3 years

Text

Airplane Mode

Summary: Being away from Boba for two weeks turns out to be harder than you had anticipated. (Part 5 of Midnight Special)

Pairing: hot dad!Boba Fett x fem!Reader

Wordcount: 4.5k

Rating: E (18+ only!)

Warnings: explicit sexual content, dom/sub relationship, phone sex, vaginal fingering, dirty talk, also some pining?

It is time for more hot dad!Boba! I am so excited to share this chapter with you because yes we get some very nice filth but these two idiots are also finally starting to really talk and it makes me very soft. As always, big shout out to @ayybtch for enduring my thirsting for hot dad!Boba. I hope you all have an amazing start into the week and let me know what you think of this chapter!

masterlist | crossposted on AO3

At first, you had thought that you wouldn’t notice Boba was gone because you had already seen him on Thursday. That should technically tide you over for a week, right? You never met more frequently than that anyway and until now you never felt like there had been any reason to. A little anticipation never hurt anybody.

But as Saturday rolled around, the sun shining through your bedroom windows, you knew you had been wrong.

Very, very wrong.

Because suddenly you had a whole day all to yourself and no Boba to look forward to. You wanted nothing more than to meet him again, to feel that warm feeling in your belly when you got your groceries, knowing you did not have to plan for dinner nor breakfast the next day.

Except for a short text on Friday morning (“Flight was delayed but I am in my hotel now. Have a good day, little one.”) Boba hadn’t texted you at all and the more time passed the more insecure you grew about texting him. Maybe he was so busy he just did not have the headspace to talk to you? To think of you?

And why was it then so difficult for you to not think of him when he could spend an entire weekend not talking to you?

You groaned, rolling out of bed and grabbing for an all too familiar flannel to throw on over some leggings.

This weekend would suck. Big time.

“Are you even listening to me?”

You flinched and finally looked up from your phone. (Unread Messages: 0) Nat had her chin perched on your cubicle wall again, red hair spilling over her shoulders as her dark eyes pierced you to your soul. Her eyebrows were knotted together and she was chewing pink gum, the colour popping between her teeth now and then.

“You look like you did not get any sleep at all,” she finally said, eyeing you with concern, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, sorry,” you shook your head, forcing yourself to smile, your hand tightening around your phone, “It’s just been a long weekend.”

“It certainly looks like it,” she joked, pointedly looking at the device in your hands, “Did the mysterious bar guy have anything to do with it?”

Yes, but not in the way you think, you wanted to say but decided against it. Instead, you managed a tight-lipped smile and let your phone slip into your bag. “No, uh, no, it was just a weird few days is all. How was your weekend?”

“Fun!” she exclaimed, “I tried out goat yoga with a few friends. You should really come join us next time, you know, I bet you’d have fun.”

“That sounds good,” you smiled and this time you meant it. Natalie seemed like the kind of person that you could steal horses with and the more you talked to her the more comfortable you felt in her presence. She seemed like she could become a really good friend.

“You know, I was wondering,” she started, blowing a bubble before popping it, “I know you’re kind of new here and my family is having this huge BBQ the weekend after next and they invite a whole bunch of people – extended family, neighbours, that kind of thing – you want to come?”

You gaped at her, waiting for her to tell you it was a joke, but she seemed dead serious and it made your heart jolt. She was really inviting you to spend time with her and even after all the times you had declined her invitations.

“Oh, uh, yeah,” you swallowed, quickly nodding before she could interpret it as something else, “Yeah, that sounds lovely. Should I bring anything?”

Nat smiled, obviously happy that you had agreed, “Nothing but your happy self,” she chirped, “Don’t you worry about a thing, I’ll text you the details.”

You smiled, watching her leave and your eyes fell to your phone again, nestled between your charger and your wallet. The screen was still black.

And it was only Monday.

Your companions for a Wednesday night were called Ben and Jerry Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream as you sulked over the fact that you could not keep your feelings in check. Whenever you seemed to have just a minute to yourself, your thoughts wandered to an older man and the way his hands and lips and body made you feel like you were experiencing parallel universes.

And the more time passed, the more you thought about his voice, his smile, his humour, the way he seemed to care about you and take care of you whenever he had the chance.

Fran Fine’s Mr Sheffield! ripped you out of your thoughts and your eyes fell to the spoonful of ice cream in your hands. With a sigh, you took a spoonful and let it melt over your tongue, the combined taste of chocolate and brownies offering a little refuge from your stormy thoughts.

You could not help but wonder what Boba was doing. There was a bit of a time difference so surely, he was asleep by now, maybe after a business dinner or two, and quite obviously not wasting a single thought about you.

Why couldn’t you do that too?

Tired of feeling miserable you made the untypical decision to put the half-finished pint of ice cream back into the freezer. Better to save that ice cream for a day where you could appreciate the taste instead of wallowing in self-pity.

With the freezer door closed, you turned around with a deep breath, taking in your apartment. There was the laundry basket on your dinner table turned work desk by the window and your couch fully laden with the weight of all the outfits you had tried on that had not found their way back into your wardrobe yet. And it all was illuminated by the blue-tinged light of your TV.

The only thing missing was All By Myself playing in the background and you would make a great rendition of Bridget Jones’s opening scene.

But before you could laugh about your own joke (and misery) you were caught off guard by a strange buzzing sound that had you pausing. You frowned, walking over to your phone where it was charging on your nightstand.

Boba Fett is calling.

Your eyes grew wide and before you knew what you were doing, you had pulled your phone from the charger and held it to your ear, “Hello?”

“Hello, little one.”

Something about hearing his deep voice again instantly made you feel better. All the tension melted from your shoulders and you were grinning so widely, your cheeks would start to hurt at any moment, you were sure. “Hi.”

“Am I calling at a bad time?”

Your eyes went to the lonely spoon on the coffee table and the muted TV, The Nanny still running on loop. You did not even want to think about what season you were on now.

“Not at all,” you sighed, “Actually … I was thinking about you.”

“You were?” he sounded pleased, the tone making your heart skip a beat, “Guess what I was thinking about you too.”

“Yeah?” you grinned, sitting down on the plush mattress, “What about me?”

“I am not sure the kind of thoughts I am having should be talked over on the phone, little one,” he warned you deeply and you felt a shiver run down your spine. Your whole body was on alert, suddenly noticing the absence of him for so many days and

“Oh, those are the best thoughts to say over the phone though,” you protested although your heart sped up in anticipation. You had never actually had phone sex before but the thought had always intrigued you – and who better to try it out with than Boba?

“If you must know, I was just about to take care of myself when I was thinking about how your mouth feels so much better than my hand,” he revealed, “And then I got hard just thinking about how tight your pussy is around me.

“Oh stars,” you breathed, leaning back against the pillows as you felt heat shoot up your cheeks – a little from embarrassment and a lot from arousal – and wetness between your thighs, “Are – Boba, are you touchingyourself right now?”

There was a little shuffle on the other side of the phone and you could hear him take a deep breath before a low groan filled your ears, “Now I am. Listening to your voice and imagining that it’s your hand instead of mine. Are you on your bed?”

You nodded before realizing he couldn’t see you, “Yes.”

“Are you naked?”

“No.”

“Can you undress for me little one?” he asked, an edge to his voice that you knew came from him trying to keep a moan from getting out, “Want you to touch yourself while we’re talking. Is that okay?”

“Sure, just let me –“ quickly you put the phone down, shimmying out of your pyjama shorts and throwing your sleep shirt to the laundry basket before crawling back onto the bed. You had changed the sheets this morning and nothing felt nicer than fresh sheets on bare skin. Except, maybe, for having Boba having there with you.

“I’m back,” you breathed, your hand raising your phone to your ear. You were already breathless from excitement, your chest heaving and your nipples pebbling from the sudden cool air. For a moment you thought about slipping under the covers but then you thought about what it would be like to have his eyes roaming over you, how he would praise you for your confidence and you decided against it.

“Did you touch yourself since I left?” he asked, his breath coming heavy, and you squeezed your thighs together. You let your free hand drift over your collarbone, closing your eyes and imagining he was right there with you.

“Yes,” you confirmed, your hand running over your belly down to your thighs, “Once. But it didn’t feel as good as you did.”

He chuckled before sharply inhaling and your thighs clenched as you imagined him in front of you, pumping his shaft in his big hand. You could practically taste the precome on his tip, your walls fluttering at the thought of having him in your mouth again.

“Of course, it didn’t,” he replied, “It wasn’t me. It wasn’t my cock filling you up or my fingers making that little pussy clench. I know that little pussy of yours, princess,” he growled and your heart stopped, “No one can make you come like I do. Not even you.”

“Boba,” you gasped, your thumb and forefinger rolling your nipple, pinching slightly in a way that you knew only he had done previously.

“I want you to touch yourself for me,” he instructed, a low moan leaving him, “I want you to come when I do, little one. Do you want that?”

“Yes,” you breathed, “Stars, yes, I want that Boba. M-missed you so much.”

“Miss you too, princess,” he groaned, “Miss seeing the way your pussy grips around me. That look in your eyes when you come around my cock again and again,” you both took a deep breath, memories washing over you and you swallowed, “Go on, is that pussy wet for me?”

You did as he told you, slowly testing the wetness between your thighs and sighing when you felt how slick you were. “’m really wet,” you admitted, circling a single finger over your clit, “Boba, I want – please, I need –“

“Ask nicely and I might just allow you to put a few fingers in that greedy pussy of yours,” he rumbled, immediately recognizing what you needed. Faint wet sounds could be heard, rhythmically and you felt a new rush of wetness drip around your folds. You remembered the image he offered as he had stroked himself in front of you in the motel, the pure image of dominance and sex appeal.

“Please, Boba,” you whimpered, “Can I touch myself?”

“Yes, you can,” his voice was hoarse and you smiled, your fingers immediately swiping between your folds, “Work yourself open for me. What are you thinking about?”

“You,” you replied truthfully, your hips bucking against your fingers working your clit, “It’s always you.”

“I know it is,” he cooed, “But what are you thinkingabout? Use your words, little one.”

You were so wet that your finger slipped inside you without resistance. Still, you took great care to go slow, swiping your thumb over your clit as you slowly started to grind your hips against your hand. The heat in your cheeks was unbearable as you smacked your lips, trying to think of what to say.

There were so many images and thoughts coursing through your mind, your heart beating in your chest and your walls clenching around your fingers as you focussed on the low sound of his breathing. You imagined him in a big bed, one of those fancy hotel ones, leaning back against the headboard as he pumped his shaft, his chest moving with his movements, a light sheen of sweat on his skin.

“I’m thinking of what you look like,” you brought out, almost shyly, “When – when we had those toys and you sat in front of me and you were right in front of me.”

“Oh, I remember that,” he mused, “You were so good for me that day, letting me fuck your throat and the way you knelt in front of me,” he groaned, “Stars you were so desperate to have my cock in your mouth.”

“Uh-huh,” you nodded quickly, gasping as your thumb flicked over your clit, “I wan-wanted to please you so bad, Boba, it was so hot, oh kriff, I – I love it when you’re rougher with me. Always make me feel so good.”

“Yeah?” he gasped, clearly out of breath now and you could hear his movements get quicker, your hand soon following suit. You wanted to pinch your nipples, wanted to play with your tits some more but you also needed to hold your phone up and you did not have the heart to put it on speaker. Like this, it felt like Boba was right next to you, his mouth by your ear as he whispered the filthiest things to you. “Bet you’re already close, aren’t you? Almost a whole week without me fucking you, princess, that must’ve taken its toll on you.”

It was almost scandalous, the way he made you feel so very shameless and you added a second finger, relishing in the way it stretched you out. Two of your fingers were nothing in comparison to him but for the moment it was enough. “Keep talking,” you gasped, lifting your hips off your bed to meet that angle that worked wonders for you, your muscles already protesting, “Keep talking. Boba, please.”

“’m close too,” he grunted, “Keep imagining you in front of me, where I would put my come. Your mouth or your pussy or,” a low groan that made you clench around your fingers, “Maybe just right on those pretty tits. Stars, I love your tits, princess. I know you like me making a mess of you. It makes you feel a little dirty doesn’t it, letting a man twice your age fuck you whichever way he pleases and filling you to the brim.”

You nodded, a breathless Uh-huh leaving you as your hand sped up, feeling already so veryclose to the edge. “Love it,” you mumbled, “Love you fucking me so much.”

“Don’t you worry, when I’m back I have a new toy for you to try out,” he revealed, his voice sounding more strained, a tick that told you he was close as well, closer than he wanted to admit, “one that will require me making a mess of you – in you.”

Your eyes opened wide in surprise as your mind provided several ideas of what this new toy could be – each one filthier than the last – but it was the idea of having him back – of seeing and feeling him again so soon – that pushed you over the edge.

“Boba, I’m coming,” you threw your head back, your thumb furiously rubbing over your clit as your walls clamped around your fingers. There was an approving groan on his side, followed by some surely encouraging words but you could not hear him, your body so focussed on the sensation of how it felt rather than what was happening around you.

For some reason, this orgasm took more out of you than usual. Your hearing felt muffled and you had to keep your eyes closed for a few moments longer. Somewhere along the way you had let go of your phone, the little device softly landing on your pillow next to your head and you only barely heard his low groan as Boba came in a hotel room hundreds of miles away from you.

Blindly you reached for the box of tissues on your nightstand, cleaning your fingers as best as you could. From across the room, you spotted the muted episode of The Nanny continuing and you smiled. The tension of the last few days had melted away from you and had been replaced by a pleasant warmth all throughout your body. Your legs still felt kind of limp as you sat up, pulling the blanket over your now quickly cooling body before reaching for the phone.

He was still on the line when you came down from your high. He did not say anything outright but you could hear his breathing and the way he shifted sometimes. You smiled, turning on your side and letting the air cool your body down.

“So … that was a first,” you whispered into the phone, your throat feeling tight still, “Thank you, Boba.”

He still sounded out of breath and you could almost feel the warmth of his chest against your cheek, knowing he would pull you into a hug if he were here. “Thank you, little one. I really needed that.”

Your heart skipped a beat at that admission. He said he needed that. He needed that you as you had needed this. Stars, you knew you should not read too much into it but it felt like you had thrown your heart at his feet already and every time he said something like this it just made you want to offer him more.

Realizing that you had smiled at the ceiling for quite some time now you quickly cleared your throat, “So, uh, how’s Hawaii?”

“Boring without you,” he replied, “Next time I think I just might have to take you with me.”

“That’s what I want to hear,” you joked, shuffling your feet under the blanket, “But I am serious, Boba. Is – Are they nice to you?”

Even through the hearer, the low chuckle he let out made shivers appear on your skin, “Little one, how much older am I than you? You should not need to be worrying about me.”

“But I do,” you mumbled, feeling bashful because you knew your heart was not supposed to feel this soft for a mere fling, “I know we only ever meet to … you know … but I’d like to think that we’re friends. And friends care about each other.”

It was silent on his side and you froze, your heart starting to race out of your chest. Had you said something wrong? Was this already too much? Had you crossed the invisible line and made things awkward now and he regretted calling you?

“I care about you too,” he said, finally, and you swore there was a softness in his voice that you had never heard before, “I am sorry I did not call earlier. I know you said I could text but I wasn’t sure if it would be okay.”

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“I don’t know,” he admitted, “I wasn’t sure if it was a serious offer. It made me think of what this is between us and the answer is that,” he paused, “I don’t know. I don’t know what’s between us.”

It made your breath catch in your throat, the way he was so open with you. You knew it must take him a lot of courage to do that. He had always sounded so sure before, cocky almost in the way he had flirted with you. But this seemed to be new territory even for him and it somehow relieved you, this even playing field.

“To be honest I am not so sure either,” you confessed, swallowing harshly, “But – But I like seeing you and I like talking to you. I really do.”

“Me too, princess,” Boba said and you could hear more shuffling, “So … you would be okay with me texting you?”

“And calling,” you added with a smile, turning to lay on your side, “I really missed hearing your voice.”

“I gotta remember that for when I see you again,” he chuckled on the other side, “But for now, I will let you sleep. Sound good?”

“Sounds perfect,” you yawned, “Good night, Boba.”

“Sweet dreams, little one.”

After that night, you woke up every day to a new text message from Boba. Sometimes it was a simple Good morning, other times he sent you a picture of the beach he had been to that day. It was nothing extraordinarily romantic or flirty but it still made your heart fly in your chest because it meant he was thinking of you.

In turn, you sent him texts about your day, wishing him success with his meetings and telling him about your quarrels with Brenda from marketing and listening to him complain about the ‘overeager and incompetent’ colleagues he had to face (“More like ‘keep in check’, little one.”) at the conference.

You only noticed several days later that none of the things you had sent each other were meant to lead to sexual activities.

You just liked talking to each other.

“A good and wonderful Wednesday to you all,” someone screamed in your ear, “We officially made it to the middle of the workweek. Clara, what can you tell us about the traffic?”

“Well, Michael, rush hour is well underway with traffic jams on the –“

Your hand landed on your alarm clock before finding its way back to your face, covering your eyes. You groaned. Why did it always have to be so early?

Technically, of course, you knew why. But that did not take away from the pure annoyance you felt when you had to get up every day before you wanted to.

But what didn’t you do for money?

A buzzing alerted you to a new text message and you smiled. You had the sneaking suspicion the last few days that Boba somehow noticed your daily routine and sent his text messages accordingly. Why else would he send you a good morning message every day at exactly 7 am?

With that love-struck smile on your face that you knew wouldn’t go away until you spotted your first Brenda email of the day, you reached for your phone, your display already lighting up.

Boba Fett: Thought of you today.

Boba Fett sent one (1) attachment.

Rubbing the sleep from your eyes you did not think of anything as you opened the chat, the video he sent you quickly loading. But when the first frame was displayed, you knew exactly what kind of video he had sent you.

Because there, right in front of the camera, was Boba’s hand jerking himself off slowly. The camera was a bit shaky and you did not blame him. You spotted a drop of precome, his thumb swiping over his flushed tip and there was that vein you liked to trace with your tongue and his hand looked so big and –

A low groan came from the video, lower and deeper even than what you were used to from him but there was no mistaking. This was Boba.

Was that what he sounded like in the mornings? By the stars, if you thought his normal bedroom voice would be the death of you, this was a whole other level.

The video stopped and before you knew what you were doing, you clicked play again. This time you forced yourself to take in all the other little details. In the background, you could spot the cream carpets of the room and he was still dressed, his unbuttoned white dress shirt around his wrist.

His tanned hand was working his cocks slowly, clearly putting on a show for you and by the stars was it working.

You felt giddy, like you had done something forbidden, broken the rules even though it couldn’t be further from the truth. With a look at the clock (stars, you really needed to get going) you opened the chat window.

You: How am I supposed to wait three whole days for you to come back when you send me videos like this?! 🥵

Boba Fett: I am sure you will be able to think of something to pass the time, little one.

You liked to think that it was all Boba’s fault.

He had been the one to send you that video, after all, the one that you could

Because now it was Friday evening and you were on your bed on all fours, chest pressed against the sheets with your hips in the air as you watched that video again and again. And how could you not? Boba knew exactly how to put himself in scene and he also knew what piqued your interest. And this certainly did.

After almost two weeks away from him, it was like your body was just ready for him in every way. It was so easy to imagine that he was the one doing the things to you. You imagined it was him as your nipples rubbed against the cool fabric of your sheets. You imagined it was him as you worked yourself open with your fingers – first one, then two, then (finally and with lots of patience) three that already had you close to coming. And you imagined it was him as you replaced your fingers with the rabbit vibrator you had bought years ago.

You gasped, your hips twitching as you switched it on, the sensation almost too much. You wanted to close your eyes so badly, wanted to focus on the sensation deep in your core but the video playing in front of you had you enraptured. The way his hand wrapped around his shaft, how gravelly his voice sounded, how you knew how heavy he would feel like in your hand.

A low chuckle brought you out of your thoughts, the sound all too familiar and you froze, your walls still clamping around the fake shaft inside you. Your chest heaved with the effort to keep your hand from moving. Your body was screaming for you to keep going, to keep getting closer to that edge you had been working towards.

“Boba,” you gasped, spotting the man leaning against your doorframe, “Y-You’re back!”

He chuckled, his eyes roaming over your body before landing on your phone in front of you. “I am,” he nodded to the array of toys strewn about the bed, “Now … Are you gonna let me play with you, little one?”

So yeah, it was really all just his fault.

#maybege writes #boba fett x reader #boba fett x fem!reader #smut

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sscoutregimentss · 3 years

Text

i know we as a collective society believe in gamer! eren supremacy. and yes, this is a good take. however, may i introduce to you: normie/fuckboy/jock eren with gamer/nerd gf. thoughts under the cut (safe for work, pg-13, also slight snk spoilers for season 3 and up!)

see, eren isnt necessarily a fuckboy. in fact, hes very loyal! he doesnt really think that way about any girls or guys except you. but hes popular romantically and had a reputation for sleeping around before he met you (not that theres anything wrong with that but ya know word travels fast across campus). plus, cmon the dude is in a frat, super hot and has a tongue piercing. he cant blame anyone for thinking he is a fuckboy bc he exudes the energy.

you are kind of the complete opposite. you dont really enjoy parties and you keep to yourself. you're a total wreck when it comes to flirting and your kinda oblivious to whenever people like you. you dont have many friends and are a bigger fan of 2d people than 3d.

either way eren finds you so so so cute. he first approached you at one of his frat parties. your roommates convinced you to come after she said that someone (read: connie) had a dance dance revolution mat, but you kinda just stuck around in a corner staring at your cup once you lost them. he looks you up and down-- your outfit was pretty cute, a short plaid orange pleated skirt, dress shirt, orange cardigan and black beret laying neatly upon your head. and your face... he couldn't help himself but try to talk to you. you were really anxious because wahhh scary sports guy you dont know but he was kinda instantly comforting? in a way? and he was freaking pretty. he looked like a final fantasy character--long haired characters were your type. the rest was kind of history.

a lot of people are shocked when they find out your dating bc you two are so different (some people are surprise eren “dates” at all) but no one dares question your relationship when they see how much eren dotes on you. he has so many polaroids of you in his wallet-- from the many arcade dates you bring him on where you decimate him at almost every game, you awkwardly posing in the hentai section of bookstores, or just candids of you being intensely focused on a puzzle in a game. whenever you guys go out to eat and somethings wrong with your meal, he'll send it back (in a polite way, of course, but hes still assertive.) or if you buy like a figurine and its misisng something hes marching up to the cashier stand for you. he always has an arm around your waist or is holding is hand in yours. sometimes you just cling onto his arm and rest your head on it (hes comfy!!!!! and you are always tired) your both pretty clingy, but you get kinda awkward when you two are around people you know so he just kinda subtly holds you as to not make a scene. its nice. hes comfy.

youve got dual monitors, a pc you made yourself, rgb keyboard, the whole nine yards. all your consoles are up to date and you keep a handheld system on you at all times. you spend most your weekends watching anime and movies and tv shows and your shelves are piled high with books and comic books. eren literally does not understand any of it. when you told him you built your pc he goes "you made all those microchippy things? youre soooo smart babe". when you talk about some of your weirder or more complicated animes he nods along but honestly he gets so lost ("so like, lemme get this straight, the kids dad's wife ate his mom?" "yeah but like she was turned into a titan so she didn't realllllly know it was the dads wife, but like she literally walks past this titan shifter so i think she knew." "thats crazy.") and he will never understand the point of otome games when hes literally right there. he actually has a really bad habit of getting jealous of characters you have a crush on but you just find it funny. sometimes he gets an ego boost when they look like him because even if they look like him he is actually real so they can suck it.

hes rlly supportive tho. erens a rlly passionate person and he loves you a lot so he pours a lot of passion into what you do. if you are into esports/fps games hes cheers you on all the time and does all the raging for you ("BABE THAT GUY IS STREAM SNIPING! HES STREAM SNIPING YOU HEY ASSHOLE STOP CHEATING OFF MY GIRLFRIEND" "eren he cant stream snipe me because i dont stream" "oh i thought that just meant cheating"/"WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL HER?" "eren its okay i can just report him" "NO NO LET ME AT HIM IF HE WANTS TO CALL YOU A BITCH I CAN CALL HIM MUCH WORSE" "um guys im gonna mute my mic for a second if you need me text chat") if youre into cozy games he likes to watch you play and gives you ideas on where to put things. like in minecraft he makes you put a second bed for him even though he doesnt play and he helps you name all your pets. you get a little less intense with cozy games so you sit on his lap and he lets his hair down puts his head on your shoulder and points at where you should place stuff. he still rages though? this is eren jaeger we are talking about. ("aw, she wont move to my island." "WHAT? who does that little ugly squirrel think she is? you think youre too good for MY y/n's island? i'll shave your unibrow off. then we'll see what island will want you" "leave hazel alone! shes cute!"/"dude that hamster guy with the glasses looks like armin" "graham? what? armin doesnt even wear glasses" "no no look at it more" "oh shit youre right") rpgs/otome games are kinda a wild card with how he acts. if its an otome game and the character looks like him he is more into helping you out because it reaffirms to him that you find him good looking but otherwise he is just sulking and calling them annoying ("princess y/n... i know im just a servant, but i want to be with you forever!" "pft. get a load of this guy. clingy much?" "its romantic! youre jealous.")

one of his favorite things to do with you is cuddle and watch anime. usually he lies his face on your thighs or chest while watching and you play with his hair or he holds you in his chest and you play with one of his hands while the other goes behind his head. he grew up on some of the classics like naruto sailor moon one piece pokemon and dbz but he never got super into it until he started dating you. you put him on to soooo many good shows (cartoons, anime, and live action) hes both a crier and he is a get-angrier(?). he gets mad on characters behalfs and you have to pause the show so he can rant about how annoying someone is or he feels so bad for someone so he has to take a minute because hes tearing up. he likes slice of life anime because the friendships <3 theyre so wholesome and they remind him of him armin and mikasa but he also likes shounen because it is entertaining to watch fights. he gets really into them actually. he also has this really bad habit of whenever there is a character with no parents or a dead mom he goes "oh same" or "welcome to the club buddy" under his breath. when theres a cute couple in an anime you both like guys get matching keychains of them unless one of them dies because he thinks its bad luck. his favorite animes are haikyuu, your lie in april and code geass.

you are equally supportive of erens volleyball career. you know all the rules because sports anime and you actually find yourself really liking it in 3d as well (it is lacking in bromance and screaming but you let it slide). you go to all his games and he always texts you before his practices. has a habit of kissing you before games and one day after he kisses you go "gg ez win" as a JOKE but then they like decimate their long time rival marley university and get into nationals (is that a thing for volleyball idk sports) so hes convinced its because you did your "gamer magic". now every time after getting his good luck kiss he interlocks your pinkies and you go "gg ez win" and he goes “yes.” because to this day he doesnt know what it means (he thinks googling it is like breaking the magic)

okay im gonna stop while im ahead BECAUSE I COULD TALK ABOUT THIS ALL DAY I MIGHT JUST GO AHEAD AND WRITE SOME ONESHOTS....

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ptersparkers · 4 years

Text

the art of eating pussy (5)

summary: upon realizing you lack skills in the bedroom when a touron asks you out on a date, you turn to jj, a self-proclaimed sexual deviant, for help.

warnings: smut, y’all.

notes: i haven’t been in the right headspace to right recently and wanted to give my reads something of quality and substance, not something to rush just for satisfaction. behold, chapter five.

co-authored and co-written with @storiesbymads. SHOW MY WIFE SOME LOVE.

add yourself to my taglist + series masterlist

JJ’s hung up.

You’d been spending less time at the Chateau in favor of spending time with Trent since it was the last week that he’d be on the island. His mind was racing, conflicted with the thoughts of your mouth on Trent and his lips on your neck. The night of the party had been the worst moment of the week and his jaw hurt from clenching by the time he ended up crashing out on John B’s couch. JJ always drank to forget and that night wasn’t an exception.

He knew it wasn’t just about sex with you anymore. It wasn’t about the opportunity for him to get off by the hand of someone else. It wasn’t about him taking advantage of you. There was nothing complicated about the two of you in the bedroom.

But outside of the bedroom, JJ’s head was spinning every time you said goodbye or forced him out the door because your parents were home. He didn’t have to think when he was with you; JJ knew what you wanted and knew what to expect. He knew that his time alone with you was the product of these lessons but that didn’t mean he had to think of this time as anything but passionate. When his tongue wasn’t down your throat, he was thinking about the tight feeling in his chest that left him wondering what was going to happen once you told him it was over because he didn’t want this to end.

JJ hadn’t thought about the lessons ending until he saw you tucked underneath Trent’s arm at the party. This whole situation wasn’t friends with benefits and he knew it, which is why it messed with his head so much. Yes, there was the whole “no strings attached” ordeal, but this wasn’t just one of you calling the other for sex. This was much more complicated. You were one of JJ’s best friends but the only difference is you’d seen him naked, intentionally.

His thoughts are preoccupied with the idea that once the lessons end, you might still be with Trent despite him no longer being on the island. JJ would have to go back to being just friends and he’d have to pretend that he never saw you naked. He’d have to pretend he didn’t revel in the thought of you trembling beneath him. The other Pogues, to his knowledge, had no idea that the both of you were fooling around and he didn’t know if it was something he wanted to disclose. On one hand, he wanted a second opinion on whether or not this was something healthy. On the other hand, he knew what they would say; that JJ didn’t care about catching feelings and it was unlikely that he would consider succumbing to being a boyfriend. He knew he’d expressed his disdain for relationships in the past, but now he wasn’t so sure.

You ended up skipping out on the last two beach sessions in favor of Trent. Pope had decided to stay behind on the sand with JJ while Sarah, Kiara, and John B. enjoyed themselves under the warmth of the sun and the contrasting coolness of the ocean waves. Pope could sense something was amiss when JJ was the first to propose having a relaxing afternoon and hadn’t shown up with his surfboard tucked underneath his arm.

“Something’s up,” Pope stated. “Something’s been up for a while and I didn’t want to say anything about it until I knew for sure, but something’s definitely up.” JJ shook his head.

“It’s nothing.” Pope nudged JJ with his shoulder.

“C’mon, man. You don’t want to surf, your mind is a million miles from where you are, and not to mention, this entire week you’ve been moody.”

“I’m not moody,” JJ muttered with a scowl, flicking at a clump of sand near his foot. Pope’s mouth formed a knowing smile. JJ sighed. “Okay, I’ve been moody.”

“What’s up? Is it your dad again?”

“No,” JJ replied softly. “I just think life is bullshit.”

“We all think life is bullshit.”

“Feelings are bullshit.” Pope’s ears perked with interest.

“Feelings?” JJ looked at Pope before looking back at the view in front of him, watching as Kiara had playfully splashed Sarah with ocean water. He wished he could feel that carefree.

“They suck,” he began. “I think it’s stupid that people are allowed to feel something for people and not know if they feel the same.”

“Are you talking about someone?” JJ paused.

“No,” he replied.

“Okay...” Pope trailed off. JJ sighed once more.

“What I’m trying to say, is, I wish we weren’t cursed with not knowing where the lines are blurred and I wish we could all say how we feel without consequence.”

Pope sensed that JJ was trying to speak metaphorically and project his emotions on a secondary situation. He nodded, trying to follow the blond’s train of thought. He pursed his lips as JJ spoke and wanted to understand what he was saying to the fullest extent, but the boy decided to let JJ talk.

“Have you ever thought about getting off this island?” JJ asked after a few moments of silence.

“What kind of question is that?” Pope asked, laughing. “Of course I do.”

“But really,” said JJ. “Not just getting off and seeing what it’s like. I mean, like, what you’re gonna be doing in twenty years and the people who are going to be in your life.”

“Sometimes,” Pope replied with a casual shrug. “I try to take things one day at a time. I never want to overwhelm myself.”

“Lucky you,” JJ muttered. “I see myself off of this stupid fucking island by the time I’m thirty. I don’t want to live in a place where I feel trapped and can’t say what I want to fucking say.”

“I want to be able to forget about the Kooks,” Pope chimed in. JJ nodded. “I kinda want to live in San Francisco.”

“I’d probably live in Europe or something,” JJ said. “Don’t know where but I’d want to experience life as far away from North Carolina as possible.”

“You sure you’re okay?” Pope asked. He knew he wasn’t.

“Yeah, man,” JJ replied. “Just got a lot of things on my mind.”

The idea of fooling around with anyone that wasn’t you hadn’t crossed JJ’s mind. He’d been to Boneyard keggers since the lessons began but the notion of flirting and bringing a girl back to the Chateau was way off his radar. The Pogues didn’t take much notice but JJ wondered if they knew something was amiss or if they’d say something about it if they did. If he was able to realize he hadn’t slept with anyone since he began “teaching” you, then they might have. JJ knew their worlds didn’t revolve around him, and the boy was still as goofy and troublesome as ever, but there was a seeded doubt that made him awkward whenever he was around his friends if you happened to be there.

It wasn’t that his stomach felt queasy or that his heart was racing. He’d be lying to himself if he admitted that. His head was clear when it came to how he felt about you and he wouldn’t hesitate rushing to your house if you called him for another lesson or if you just wanted to kick back with him in your room and jam out to vinyls you pulled out whenever you felt nostalgic. Before, he would never have considered approaching your side of the island but now he didn’t feel as small as he did when he didn’t have a reason to be there. Your parents were familiar with your friends and didn’t mind JJ stopping by, which gave him more of an incentive to visit you when he had had enough of the Chateau and his friends’ loud personalities.

JJ knew his head was clear when it came to how he was feeling. The only part that clouded his judgement was Trent and dealing with the different friendship he’d have with you. He was sure that if the Touron wasn’t in the picture, things would be much easier for him. Trent’s dark and slick hair reminded him of greed and filth. His boisterous personality reminded JJ of everything he never wanted to be and he couldn’t understand why you’d pay attention to him for longer than a quick glance. The Touron was casually cool, the type of person who wanted to say they were able to rub elbows with the socialites of New York City by posting it on his social media accounts. You, on the other hand, were down to earth and courageous about your future potential. He couldn’t fathom why you were so attracted to someone who was your opposite.

Your head had been spinning too. Trent was the perfect gentleman and he hadn’t given you a reason to not trust him. And yet, every moment you spent with him reminded you that you weren’t spending it with JJ. You couldn’t understand why you’d been thinking about his shaggy hair when he wakes up or the way his eyes squint when he laughs a little too hard. Trent was giving you his full and undivided attention, and you always felt guilty when you needed to force yourself back into reality because you had been zoning out, daydreaming of being anywhere else.

But JJ never seemed to be anything other than friendly with you. You opted to disregard how he acted during the lessons, summing that up to pent up sexual frustration and a genuine interest to help you out after years of teasing you. You weren’t completely naive; you knew this was a way for JJ to get himself off, much like it was for you. The only difference between JJ taking advantage of you versus not was the fact that you wanted him to teach you how to make others feel good and how to make yourself feel like a goddess in the bedroom. You weren’t exactly sure why there had been a lack of awkwardness between the both of you despite him being your best friend since birth. There was never a question of doubt from JJ when you asked him to help you learn. There was no laughing when you admitted your lack of knowledge. Perhaps that’s why your initial doubt disappeared the first time he asked you to kiss him.

Trent had apologized for the beach date when he’d gotten startled by strangers parking next to him and promised you he’d make it up to you. He came through on his promise after you got worked up before your dinner date. You arrived at the hotel he was staying at while his father attended an event on the other side of Figure Eight and his hand glided up the side of your dress. Trent wasn’t rough nor was he gentle; he was giving you what you thought you wanted but it didn’t feel as skilled or as tender as when JJ’s fingers were inside of you. With JJ, your orgasm approached as if JJ already knew everything there was to know but Trent took his sweet time making you cum.

You always cursed yourself for letting your mind wander innocuously to JJ when Trent’s lips were on your neck or when his fingers were toying with the hem of your clothing. There wasn’t much going on between you and Trent, sexually, despite him wanting to take it further. You were lucky enough that Trent verbally expressed his willingness to wait, but you wondered if that wait time had an expiration date. You wanted to make sure if it felt right before you were able to deliver on a promise. You knew that your lessons with the blond would come to an end the moment you two had gone all the way, or until you were ready to experience sex without JJ, and you always moved that thought to the back of your mind to avoid thinking about it.

By now, you felt guilty for spending the majority of this week with Trent. Kiara had texted you a few times but understood wanting to spend time with him until he left. As far as you could tell, neither John B. nor Pope cared too much because they were happy their youngest friend was happy with someone. JJ, on the other hand, you couldn’t read. You didn’t understand why it was so difficult for you to reach out to him first or comprehend him, which you were usually good at. Suddenly, you were overthinking the way he talked to you and if he chose to sit next to you or someone else. You were overthinking his lingering gaze either on your thighs or some girl who walked past him with a weird knot in the pit of your stomach.

You kept telling yourself none of that mattered because you had Trent and you were sure you knew how you felt. Trent treated you right, was willing to wait, and never made you feel second best for not being as sexually promiscuous as he was. Yet something was lacking and you couldn’t figure out what it was.

You tried not to think about it on your way to the Chateau. The screen door slammed shut as you walked into the living room to try and save yourself from the downpour of rain. After Trent had dropped you off when his father had called him during the middle of a movie marathon, you opted to see the Pogues and spend some time with them once you realized how many times you had declined their offer to hang out. You saw JJ already sprawled out on the couch, seemingly all by himself.

“John B’s out with Sarah,” he said casually, pushing himself up onto his elbows to give you some room to sit down. You nodded a thank you, crossing your arms over your wet torso in an attempt to warm your shivering body as you sat down. Glancing down at your chest, you silently swore as you noticed your red bra was, in fact, very visible under your white shirt.

“Nice bra,” he chuckled, trying not to ogle too long. JJ hoped his comment didn’t make you feel awkward; he was having a hard time talking to you because he didn’t exactly know where he stood with you.

“Shut up,” you mumbled but you couldn’t help the heat that rose to your cheeks.

“So…” JJ trailed off. “How’ve you been? Haven’t seen you in a few days.”

“I’ve been good,” you nodded.

“And Trent?” he asked, attempting, and majorly failing, to hide the venom that laced his tongue. You mistook this as annoyance.

“Good,” you said, not wanting to talk about him anymore. JJ cleared his throat, his teeth grinding as he clenched his jaw, as he shifted on the couch so that he was sitting upright and facing you.

“You've been putting my lessons to good use?” he asked. He didn’t know why he’d asked. He had no desire to hear about you with another guy.

“You could say that,” you said. Were you really putting them to good use if you weren’t enjoying yourself with Trent nearly as much as you had been with JJ? You couldn’t tell JJ that Trent’s hands on you just sent your mind spiraling back to him or when Trent’s lips were on yours, it reminded you of that first night you started the whole thing.

“Oh? Does he make you feel good?” he asked, moving closer to you. “Because it’s not worth it if you’re not getting something out of it, too.”

“Uh, well-”

“Do you want me to make you feel good?” he asked suddenly. He knew he was asking the question more for himself but he was desperate to have you again. He figured it wouldn’t hurt to show you how a real man treats his girl.

“What?” you were taken aback by the forwardness of his question. You watched as his eyes dilated, flicking back and forth from your lips to your chest.

“You know what I mean,” he said. “You need to be shown what it’s like to be taken care of.”

“But you already-”

“Just let me do this for you,” he snapped. “Please.”

“Okay,” you said before turning your body on the couch to face him. You hadn’t stopped shivering since entering the Chateau not too long ago and your goosebumps increased as you watched JJ move closer to you. He used his right hand to pry your knees apart, positioning himself between them. Your heart rate picked up as he leaned forward to press his lips against yours, the cold air hitting your wet skin when JJ pushed the soaked fabric of your t-shirt up so that it rested just under the hemline of your bra.

“Up,” he mumbled against your lips, the vibrations forcing a soft moan out of you as you broke the kiss to lift your arms above your head. You let out a small laugh when your shirt made a sloshing sound against the ground. It stopped as soon as it started, however, because you felt JJ start applying open-mouthed kisses along your collarbones.

Feeling his body pressed up against yours stirred up all the daydreams you’d had every time you’d gotten intimate with Trent. You’d been in this position before with him, but somehow it felt better without the pretense of a lesson. You were under the guise that this wasn’t just about teaching you what you liked and what you didn’t. Part of you wanted to believe that this was more than a lesson you’d acquire from JJ’s depth of knowledge. JJ’s kisses trailed lower and lower until his teeth started toying with the waistband of your shorts. The throbbing between your legs was growing steadily and you let out a sigh of relief when he finally dipped his fingers into the waistband and tugged the wet shorts down your legs with effort because of the rain, dropping them on the floor with your shirt.

“JJ,” you whimpered as he took his time moving down your body. He slipped his hands under your knees so that he could place them on his shoulders delicately before he laid out on the couch with his face centimeters away from your nearly bare pussy.

He let out a soft laugh in disbelief at how incredibly soaked you already were. It was practically coating your thighs at this point and your cunt was aching in anticipation for his touch. All JJ could think about is how you let another man see you from this point of view, which was enough to give rise to JJ’s ego. His mission was to make you feel so good that you’d think of him the next time Trent put his hands down your pants; he wanted you to remember this moment and know what it was like to be eaten out by someone who was determined to make you orgasm like a holy grail.

JJ’s jealousy didn’t cause him to act rashly and dominate the situation. He started by pressing fluttering kisses to the side of your knee, his eyes flickering up to see you watching him intently. JJ began by tenderly kissing the inside of your thighs, making comments about how soft you are and how you smelled so sweet. He does all he can to make you squirm underneath his touch, loving that your gaze didn’t leave him even if you tried. JJ pressed a kiss to the waistband of your underwear and you whimpered at the thought of him being so close to you in a way that was more intimate than before.

He chuckled when he heard you whimper again and moved his mouth to kiss along your clothed entrance. You knew JJ’s game all too well and you knew he’d take his time teasing you until you were begging for it. It took a while to come to this conclusion, but you figured out that you enjoyed the slow pace before the big finish. JJ had taught you that when you reached an orgasm, it was less about the other party getting off by getting you off. The point of your orgasm was to make you feel like a queen in the bedroom, not like a used toy to get someone else off.

So when JJ used the pad of his index finger to move your underwear aside and toy with your cunt, you didn’t bother begging for his mouth. Instead, you closed your eyes and relished in the feeling of his warm hands on you. JJ looked pleased at your reaction and wanted to make this moment last for as long as he could. His finger moved in slow circles before hitting a sensitive nerve that caused your hips to rise, to which JJ laughed and pinned you down in the cushions.

JJ pressed two delicate kisses on your entrance. His mouth was being coated in your slick and he licked his lips, closing his eyes to savor the way you tasted. His body inched forward in an attempt to be as close to you as possible before licking a stripe with his tongue pressed flat against you, causing you to let out a deep moan in satisfaction.

JJ’s tongue worked like magic, as if he already knew all of your weak spots and was discovering the different sounds you could make by his tongue. His hands were gripping your thighs and his eyes would look at his meal before back up at you, and you had taken the liberty to use your hands to tug on his hair when he had hit a pleasure point.

“That’s a good girl,” he whispered against you to himself, proud of how loud and unapologetic you were being. He swore that if the Pogues had walked in the door, he’d stop eating your pussy and show them how pretty you looked underneath him. But he knew they would all be at Kiara’s until the storm passed.

His motions were delicate until he recalled the thought of you and Trent together in bed. His tongue began to dart in and out of you at a faster speed with every increasing thought. Giving Trent a handjob. Trent stripping you out of your bra and underwear. His fingers inside of you. His tongue down your throat. His cock in your mouth. His cock in your - JJ’s - pussy. He knew he was irrational and wrong to think that last thought, but in this moment, your pussy was his for the taking and he was going to make your orgasm like your life depended on it.

JJ’s grip on your thighs became tighter and you felt locked underneath him. Your toes curled and your hips bucked at the pressure and pace at which JJ was eating you out. His head was moving like he was catching every last drop of your wetness before going back for some more. JJ had taken the liberty to lift his head and spit on your entrance before diving back in, his tongue so deep inside of you that you almost considered asking him to use his cock instead.

“JJ,” you muttered, tugging on his hair.

“Just cum, baby,” he urged. “I’m ready for you.”

You obliged and it didn’t take you that long to release. JJ lapped the white pearls that were spilling out of you and his eyes were rolling to the back of his head as he realized this was the first time he was seeing you, and tasting you, from this angle. JJ’s jaw was becoming sore but he paid no attention as your legs spread wider against the couch and your body moved to the rhythm of his tongue.

When you were coming down from your high, JJ couldn’t have imagined anything hotter than the sight and sound before him, but your fingers reached down to your aching core in oblivion and began toying with your clit as your breathing steadied. JJ watched in awe as your fingers moved in slow, delicate and circular motions, your bottom lip in between your teeth and your eyes shut. His mouth hung open at how totally, completely, and utterly fucked you were in this orgasmic haze and was pulled out of this fantasy when you tugged your hand away and reached for a tissue to clean yourself up.

JJ couldn't think of anything to say and neither could you. You settled on watching a movie in silence.

***

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