#we could potentially close here ???
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Well fellow Callowmoores, it's almost 2024 and that will potentially be the year we see endgame of Campaign 3 - given how we've returned to the Bloody Bridge and likely intend to throw down on Ruidus and fight Predathos (somehow). Nevertheless, we're about halfway through our three week wait for another episode and since we're on the verge of intense and emotionally-charged battles ahead there'll probably be little time for romantic activity - little does not mean none, mind you - during it. Last time we had a wait like this I did a post on some underrated Callowmoore moments from the Shard Incident episodes, but since others have already wonderfully dissected the recent Feywild episodes' romantic moments I'm afraid I don't have much else to add to that.
I do, however, have a bunch of mental scenarios that didn't come to be, or have yet to come to be in different contexts to how I previously thought them up. So I thought; it's the new year, why not indulge the artists and fanfic writers who can do a better job than I can with it?
So if you like some of these things, treat it as a free prompt; draw, write, flourish however you see fit, and have a Happy New Year!
If you kept reading after that awesome, I was a little worried the main thing would be a tldr situation, and still could be I didn't expect the bullets to be as long...they were actually even longer at first so not sorry but also sorry? I guess. But anyway, we know what you're here for so let's go.
Note: The scenarios were devised to keep me from suffering crippling doubt and mental shutdown between episodes so mostly they'll be fluffy and comfort-oriented than angsty.
As mentioned before, Fearne pickpocketing the Ashton doll Laudna made to practice talking to Ashton, building up to it or luring Ashton over. Ashton's awareness of the pickpocketing can grow too or they could simply allow it from the get-go "I let her take whatever she wants."
Dancing, low-hanging fruit maybe but always good for chaos, awkwardness, wingman activity, and high energy, but I'm talking folk dancing like in Titanic not ballroom dancing, that's not their or the Feywild's style
"I'll be the judge of that." specifically for when Ashton feels they're unlovable or doesn't deserve to be loved. There's also "Then I guess I'm crazy." and "You've always deserved it."
Pickpocketing one another has been their game, but I can't deny that the thought of Ashton making something for Fearne was highly appealing too, I had them make a bracelet from melted down jewelry and gems they had on them (plus a compartment with an Oleander seed and some water from the Feywild in it), imperfectly made but sturdy and still pretty. Bonus for Ashton reverse pickpocketing it onto her.
"You've always been perfect to me" is another one I mentioned before, I usually have Ashton say it (and sometimes post-Fearne taking the shard reiterate that Fearne keeps becoming more perfect in their eyes) but it can go either way.
Sleeping beside each other's a common one. Not even sexually, often it's for comfort, soothing pain/nightmares or reassuring each other, and - if Fearne hasn't disappeared beforehand leaving Ashton waking up feeling a comforting presence missing - usually not wanting to get out of bed the following morning.
Similar to the above is short rests in close quarters, a specific one is Ashton using their primordial earth powers to pull up a discrete wall for the group to hide behind and rest a little, melding into the actual wall to offer a polymorphed Fearne (a small fire lizard usually, sticking on Orym and Ashton's heads) more space so she can rest too, albeit very snugly and pressed against them - easy opening for kisses under the jawline btw.
Metaphorical but Ashton's reassurance of "You could never hurt me" regarding Fearne's primordial fire was used a bit, plus it aligns with the recent "I'll take my fire damage now" when they hugged Fearne.
Fearne being open to Ashton about her fears of being the dark version of herself, bonus quote "I don't know that person, she's not you, never will be, you're better."
Fearne pulling the Uno Reverse "The shard hurt, but knowing you were there made it hurt much less." and/or "Thank you for saving me."
Also similar to the one above are conversations post-Fearne taking the shard exploring newfound empathy for each other's (albeit more extreme) positions at Whitestone; Fearne experiencing the intensity of the shard's fire, and Ashton experiencing the dread of seeing Fearne in pain from it and being afraid to lose her.
"Whatever happens, promise you'll come back to me" is a pertinent one for the current setting too.
What is that? 1, 2...12! One for each month, there's of course more, some are simple low-hanging fruit or more detailed (no seriously I trimmed a lot of these bullet points down in detail) but for the sake of length we'll stop here. Once again, Happy New Year my fellow Critters and Callowmoores!
#critical role#cr campaign 3#bells hells#fearne calloway#ashton greymoore#callowmoore#fearne x ashton#ashton x fearne#rockwild#taliesin jaffe#ashley johnson#trust me I have more but they are more specifically detailed or could go down very closely to how I imagine#we're talking true love's nat 20 stuff here and lava explosions etc.#I will cling to that 1% potential of mental scenarios happening every day of the week#and boy if it happens I will not be quiet about it#but if you're in the market for more detail for inspiration I could be persuaded#would've loved to see Ashton offer the Hishari Armor to Mori (to pay for failing the Communication trial) or have Fearne help destroy it#and we were quite close to them pulling a 'we'll protect ~your~ daughter' comment with Olly#whatever your ship is though we are all together in the prayer circle to keep Bells Hells safe#tag reader's bonus: I headcanon that post-awakening both Fearne and Ashton's bodies glow a little when they're flirting or feeling flushed
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Wonder how Kaptein Sabeltann looks under all that make-up 🤔What's his reason for using it? Does he have something to hide? Does he hate how he looks? I need more answers.
#kaptein sabeltann#and do we all agree that he's wearing a wig?? in line with the 18th century fashion he's inspired by#or is this is real hair??#Does he take the make-up off at night???#love that meme of “they raided it like Kaptein Sabeltann in the make-up section”#he's king of drama is what he is#feel like there's a lot of potential here#and with the song “Kongens sang” it really gives off some strange vibes we don't see anywhere else 🤔#about how he sings about distancing himself so that no one will come too close to him#there's a lot of character analysis that could be done here I think
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unrelated but i DO kinda feel guilty for my little crush for reasons i will not explain. but. yeah its wild over here tonight
#🍯#sfw#like he casually mentioned being glad he can have friends who dont expect it to become anything more and i felt ill#so. ill stop having THOSE feelings immediately lol#but i genuinely DO love him as a friend#n he said i was one of the first ppl he felt comfy writing with#and i. am soooo emotional 2night#my friends r so important 2 me and im never gonna say SHIT bc i love him as my friend wayyy 2 much#sorry im saying this here we r just mutuals on my main so. akdhsk#also we were talking abt potential meet ups the other day and i HATE living where i live. everyone else is soo far away#one of my friends is coming 2 the states soon n i will be a 10 hr drive away. thats fuckign miserable#the guy this post was originally abt and 2 of our other friends live close enough that he could drive 2 them. and its the opposite side of#the country#i wanna get 2 meet my friends so fucking BAD#like. i cant put it into words but i wanna give them hugs and see their faces when they smile and akdbdn#when is it MY turn to meet my friends irl#my shark
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i am experiencing emotions rn and idk what they are :)
#so i got laid off in march and i have not shut up about it since bc it was a horrible experience and i’m still upset about it#and quite literally the only place i wanted to work after that wasn’t hiring at the time but they said to check back in the summer#so i just started picking up extra shifts at my second job bc i’d rather wait on this place than apply to places i have no interest in#then end of april i get a call from this girl i met at my old job saying she got fired#we were super close last year and then our friendship got super weird and tense when she suddenly became my boss#and tbh i’m not at all surprised she got fired bc as much as i like her as a person she was not at all qualified to be running that business#but anyway we’ve been talking more lately than we have in the past couple months#and i was thinking our friendship could maybe go back to normal now that neither of us works there anymore#BUT now i’m feeling super weird like idk if i’m uncomfortable or annoyed or what i’m just feeling put off#bc the place i wanted to work finally started hiring a couple weeks ago and i applied and interviewed last week#and yesterday i got the job which i’m super excited about#and this friend just sent me a screenshot of her rejection letter for the exact same job at the same location#like am i crazy or is it justified to be weirded out by that??#why would you apply for the same exact job as me and not even tell me until after you get rejected#and i know she knows i applied bc i’ve been talking about it nonstop with all my friends#like i’m so confused#it’s not even about the fact that she could’ve potentially gotten chosen over me it’s just weird that she didn’t tell me she was applying#i’ve literally been talking about this job since before they were even hiring like as soon as i got laid off i said i wanted to work here#she didn’t get fired until almost 2 months after that so she wasn’t looking for a job until a couple weeks ago#so i can’t think of any scenario where it would make sense for her to just not mention this to me#idk someone please tell me if this is weird or not bc idk how to respond to her rn#lj.txt
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honestly the idea of newton and lance both ending up w gfs is funny to me only bc ik the two of them would have COMPLETELY DIFFERENT reactions the moment they realize they're in love w the girl they're now dating
basically newton's reaction vs lance's reaction
#sym bionic titan#like newton's just over here like wow love is amazing i didn't even know i could feel this way abt another person this is great ^_^#meanwhile lance over here is suffering™ bc he's basically a byronic hero trapped inside the body of a 17 yr old boy#what i'm saying is the reason newton is able to love more freely and openly than lance (atleast for rn)#is bc he doesn't have a FRACTION of the emotional baggage that lance has due to his upbringing#that boy spent years building up walls guarding his heart to keep ppl out so that he could never be hurt again#he's only now started to let ppl in like ilana and newton/octus bc they're family now but even that can still be hard for him#like sm of lance's character just goes back to this idea of the mortifying ordeal of being known (god he's so mitski's stay soft coded)#how the fear of letting ppl get close to you to love you#means that the nearness has the potential leave you wounded#or that bc you have baggage it means you're broken that prevents you being able to love others#basically what i'm saying is lance is super repressed he def has self loathing#and i CAN'T imagine him getting w kristin in the same way#newton did w kimmy in the sense that they got into a relationship relevantly fast#if anything he's gonna have a slowburn w that girl#even when lance FINALLY does get together w her#i still don't see him being like how newton is w kimmy that he's good expressing his love verbally like saying ily or petnames etc#bc we've seen in canon how lance isn't the best when it comes to that#re: consoling ilana in ep 2 or telling octus how important he is to him in ep 18 but we know he cares#i think kristin knows that and like ilana/newton accepts that abt him#lance to me is better at expressing his love and care for others thru his actions rather than his words#robi hcs#robi rambles
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'I just don't believe in/understand it!' well unfortunately for you I just don't stop existing as an agender person bc you don't believe in it. I'm not fucking tinkerbell.
#vent post#transphobia#let's play a game where we guess if my mom can ever learn to apologize when she did something wrong on accident#and that answer is rarely if ever#a lot of this isn't going to make sense#so just ignore me#also class move from my mom in response to being told she was (potentially) misgendering to RANDOMLY BRING IN MY FATHER WHO I'VE BEEN TOO#SCARED TO EVEN COME OUT TO YET#LIKE NO I HAVEN'T BROUGHT THIS UP WITH DAD AND YOU FUCKING KNOW WHY#BUT THANKS FOR BRINGING HIM INTO THE CONVERSATION I GUESS THAT WAS SUPER RELEVANT#maybe I messed up but so fucking did you#confronted her in the most neutral and nicest way I could bc I KNEW she wasn't misgendering on purpose and so I SAID THAT#and /I/ get called TOO SENSITIVE when asking them too be a bit more careful#I'm not asking for tHE FUCKING MOON HERE I'm asking you to LEARN TO CORRECT YOURSELF WHEN MESSING UP#and I keep fucking saying sorry why do I DO this the second there's friction#I just start apologizing for her and saying I never meant to cause harm I can never stick to my guns when I feel someone's mad at me#especially someone I'm close to why am I LIKE this#this happened the last time we argued and then I feel bad and she gets off scott free#this sounds one-sided but to be fair I did make a misunderstanding#but I still get called ''''too sensitive''''' while holding no accountability#I was APPROACHABLE and NEUTRAL in bringing it up so we could HAVE A CONVERSATION LIKE ADULTS#and yet STILL ASKING FOR TOO MUCH and get the cold shoulder#I knew she was mad from the first text#this shifts lines a little for me#misgendering#tw transphobia
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I've had some time to collect my thoughts after a couple of days so here they are even though nobody asked.
I really loved the finale. It was devestating, no doubt, but I think this is their best one yet and I absolutely loved how they handled it. There was so much grieving in this episode, not just from Carlos, but from Owen and Judd as well. But despite everything they chose happiness and the wedding ending up being beautiful and bittersweet and joyful all at once.
There has been the question of deleted scenes but there's really only one we've seen so far that I would have loved to see in the episode. Other than that, I'm just glad we get to have them all as extras. I don't think the wedding needed them though.
Another thing I'd like to add is that yes, sometimes storylines can feel rushed in shows where you have a lot of characters and especially if there are clear favorites within a fandom. There was a lot going on, but that doesn't necessarily mean any one character's storyline is less valuable than another's. I guess I'm speaking as less of a fandom member and just more as an enjoyer of the show if that makes any sense. I love all of the characters in this show, and while I would be lying if I said I liked every single storyline, that doesn't mean I wish they didn't happen. In this case, however, I loved all of the storylines and I think they all made sense together given the theme of this episode. I personally don't think any of them shouldn't have been there in favor of getting more wedding content.
Honestly, my only regret is not getting off of tumblr as soon as the final bts stuff started coming out. I'm pretty bad when it comes to guessing things so if I hadn't been aware of the theories I literally would have had no idea and it would have hit me so much harder. It still got me pretty good though.
Again these are just my opinions so feel free to ignore everything I say if you didn't feel the same. I'm happy though, and I'm going to continue being incredibly annoying about this show. ♡
#I'll just touch on this in the tags cayse more people have put this a lot more eloquently than I could#but in terms of the decision to kill of gabriel I know a lot of people feared two things#1) it was too close to the wedding 2) potential future storylines would take a hit#and if it had happened any other way I would have agreed with the second one#but the fact that we got that scene between him and carlos was really important#and they way it happened really opens the door for revisting this in the future#I would honestly be really surprised if they don't come back to this mystery because there's a lot of potential there#and speaking of potential I think we reallly started to see so much more of carlos and a side of his character that we've never seen before#him dealing with his grief and in the end chosing to allow himself to have his wedding#that moment between him and owen#I loved all of it and I know in shows like this it can feel like characters start to get stagnant but this is definitely not the case here#not just carlos but everyone else had moments this season that just showed us so much more of them#and it makes me excited for their character development and what future storylines will hold#anyway I think those are all of my thoughts#if you're going to say anything please be nice I don't really do well with negativity#I usually stay out of fandoms for actively airing shows because discourse isn't great for my mental health#but since y'all are like 90% lost shameless mutuals and 10% bots I feel safe enough to share my opinions publicly lmao#har rambles#911 lone star#weewoo rambles
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(can i please get a waffle voice): can i PLEASE having a coping mechanism that doesnt turn maladaptive. can i PLEAAASE have just one !!! i am Begging you, on my hands and knees !!!!! AUGH
#tfw your coping mechanism detaches you from reality and now you're watching yourself warily to make sure u dont fall into That Pit again#skirting around the edge and unhooking my claws from the coping mechanism and holding it gingerly with the tips of my fingers#praying i do not have to put it down entirely. because man..... its slim pickings around here for shit that actually Works fhfjdkl#the issue with reality being nigh unbearable ... is that you cannot bear reality. and thus detach. but u cannot go too far away from it.#or else Bad Shit happens. that i don't especially want to experience again fhdjdkdl#it'd be so cool to have a brain that didnt do this. so i could just freely la-dee-da along with fun things#instead of the fun things turning Bad bc they went too far fjfkdl#or having to keep a very close eye on myself when i get into new things bc i can see they have the potential to go badly for Me w my brain#sobbing forever honestly. i feel awful. this sucks shit. im trying to be funny about it to cope but im Upset fjfjddkl#im so sick of this type of thing fjdkdl I wish i could just like... be okay. for a while. without it going badly like this fjfkfl#i thought maybe i was on the up finally but nooooo it's just bc i was getting too far from holding onto reality properly#god i hate this pattern. im so fucking angry w it tbh fjfkfl i cannot believe i let myself think this was going to be different fjfkfl#but anyways!! onwards we march and hopefully i figure smth out fjfkdl im uhhhh very tired#going to crawl into bed at the ripe time of 8:30pm and just go listen to music and draw or smth idk fjfkfl this is frustrating#pippen needs 2nd breakfast
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thinking about buying tix off someone but I don't go to a lot of concerts and I'm kind of stupid so I don't wanna get scammed or something lol
#idk. like i would do human sacrifice to go but at the same time everything in life scares the shit out of me#so even once I've got tickets it's like I'll have to travel there on my own because the closest venue is still not that close#and no one else would want to go with me. the only ppl i could potentially convince to go physically couldn't#because they're at home not at uni where I'll be. and that's so far away from ANY of the venues it's ridiculous#we don't get ANY decent concerts here it's SICK#so even though for some people that sounds like nothing. like getting on a train by yourself going to a concert than heading back#that is all TERRIFYING for me. and obviously I'm bad with crowds i literally had a panic attack at the mall yesterday#when i complain about not going it's not even just about tickets it's about that my brain and other#circumstances won't let me go either yk!!#I'm so geographically challenged too. if i actually went it WOULD be like going off to war#hm. well if i go for it do you guys have any advice on not getting scammed
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#listen i don’t remember who it was but forever ago someone said smth on here#abt how we should acknowledge how close mike n dustin probably got between s3 and s4#(bc no el and will obviously + max was isolating + lucas was basketballing)#and how mike could have opened up to him abt his depression n potentially his sexuality during that time#anyway. i want to write it#however there is the ‘i’m not saying my gf is better than yours etc etc’ convo in s4 which doesn’t totally make sense#if mike had already come out to him#hence the lack of canon compliancy#but it could also be explained away or ignored so idk#ok sorry for writing an essay i’m just thinking thoughts
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made this visual of all the times williams theme popped up in this scene because im mad that i still cant figure out why it’s in there
#I keep looking at it expecting that if i just look long enough i'll see something 😑#but yeah still. no idea#it's absolutely impossible that they did this accidentally (like. lol. come on) but WHAT#I UNDERSTAND why dolores' theme showed up during the william sequence in 2x04. that one made sense like it seemed obvious#but why this scene for this?? why here??? what could this possibly have to do with him or her relationship with him or anything#does emmett have some sort of significance here that i didn't catch??#also before anyone comes in my notes telling me im overthinking this. no im not. this show's score is used very intentionally#i've mentioned that this is a variation on william's theme that first showed up in vanishing point so i thought maybe it had to do with that#but there's just nothing linking these two things in my brain lol. how would christina finding out about the closed system relate to william#I had this theory a while back based on a couple of small hints that potentially christina might be an amalgam of dolores and william#which would make this make a little bit more sense... but that's not the direction they seem to have gone since she just is dolores#the only thing that's coming to mind is that the ''walled garden'' is related to william somehow. which i guess wouldn't... not make sense..#the phrase ''walled garden'' was initially brought up as a way of explaining how the hosts have perfect memories that preserve everything#and obviously a major plot point in season one was dolores' perfect recall of william because she relived all her memories of him#and i have posited that a major part of season 5 is going to be william kind of being. reconstructed. into something closer to his old self#but that still feels like suuuuch a reach lol. like the dots still aren't quite connecting#My best guess is just that this is some sort of very very subtle foreshadowing that is meant to pay off in season 5#BUT WE MIGHT NEVER GET. A SEASON FIVE.#JUST EXPLAIN PLEASE JONAH AND LISA#grr!! it's gonna bother me until i know >:(#westworld
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my god im so fond of my classmate
#she prefers clara in english‚ turns out! ^-^#i told clara about my names i use in english and she was so. so full of wonder#like god! i could feel her star-eyes through my phone#she said she'd call me by my english names when at school!! we talk in english sometimes and god! i cant wait!#shes so nice by the way i love her. shes so friend if that explains it#and god. our brains are on the same wavelength i think whatever is divergent with my neuros is the same as her#also clara is so good at languages by the way. this girl is learning english + french + german + korean + chinese all in one#im over here barely learning korean#oh also. i think clara has queer potential... i might come out to her in the near future...#we've openly talked about how pretty some girls in the school are and god. the euphoria of ''maybe shes like me''#i have this with another classmate im close with as well#might come out to that one! one day. probably over text i'd die irl#anyway! clara heart emoticon#🌙rambling
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Very Strong sneaking suspicion that I might have AVPD
#Fits like a glove right down to the fact that PDs are sometimes genetic#My mom; my grandfather; and my grandfather's mother all have/had what my mom calls the ''[family name] Attitude''#And it's just like. ''We are antisocial fucks who pathologically hate being around other people''#''And you're my kid so you should too and so that is one of the many justifications I offer for having forcibly isolated you since Grade 4''#''Stop telling me you're lonely. [Family name]s are supposed to move out into the middle of buttfuck nowhere in the deep woods --#-- with only their spouse as soon as they possibly can and hide there like that until the day they die.''#''I don't care that you're my kid and we can't get to the deep woods I'm just going to let my whole yard overgrow into a jungle and live --#-- here with Only You for the rest of my life anyway. Close enough. You should be happy about this because you are a [family name].''#And the worst part is that the Live In The Woods With Only One Or Two Very Close Loved Ones absolutely DOES sound VERY appealing#It sounds very peaceful and quiet. I DEEPLY miss being able to go to my grandparents' house and just wander alone in the woods for hours.#I damn sure don't want to do it with her though. I do not love her. She has beaten and tortured me throughout my entire life.#.It speaks#.Rua 🦄#AVPD would...explain a lot...#I rehearse every single potential social situation I could end up in in my head EXCESSIVELY to plan exactly how I will get through it...#...and if I feel there is even a SLIGHT chance that something about it will go sour and become embarrassing/painful to me and I can't --#-- plan out how to shut that Potentially VERY TINY Possibility Of Pain down COMPLETELY AND THOROUGHLY then I just. Will not engage.#It's like paralysis. I just can't. It's Not Safe.#I avoid my own EXTREMELY CLOSE FRIENDS like the plague a lot and I feel EXTREMELY GUILTY about it but --#-- the reason I do it is because I don't feel like I'll be adequate enough social company. Not enough spoons to be Uplifting/Entertaining.#I'm afraid I'll just be a mood drain because I don't have enough energy to spare and THAT causes me Crushing Guilt at the notion of --#-- Inflicting My Presence On People. I don't want to get my bad vibes on anyone.#For the most part just the THOUGHT of attempting to engage socially is so nerve-wracking it's exhausting#So that ITSELF eats up all of my spoons.#>I can't engage because I don't have the energy and I don't want to drag anybody else down >The THOUGHT OF ENGAGING takes all of my energy#But I am miserably lonely
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we've found it folks: mcmansion heaven
Hello everyone. It is my pleasure to bring you the greatest house I have ever seen. The house of a true visionary. A real ad-hocist. A genuine pioneer of fenestration. This house is in Alabama. It was built in 1980 and costs around $5 million. It is worth every penny. Perhaps more.
Now, I know what you're thinking: "Come on, Kate, that's a little kooky, but certainly it's not McMansion Heaven. This is very much a house in the earthly realm. Purgatory. McMansion Purgatory." Well, let me now play Beatrice to your Dante, young Pilgrim. Welcome. Welcome, welcome, welcome.
It is rare to find a house that has everything. A house that wills itself into Postmodernism yet remains unable to let go of the kookiest moments of the prior zeitgeist, the Bruce Goffs and Earthships, the commune houses built from car windshields, the seventies moments of psychedelic hippie fracture. It is everything. It has everything. It is theme park, it is High Tech. It is Renaissance (in the San Antonio Riverwalk sense of the word.) It is medieval. It is maybe the greatest pastiche to sucker itself to the side of a mountain, perilously overlooking a large body of water. Look at it. Just look.
The inside is white. This makes it dreamlike, almost benevolent. It is bright because this is McMansion Heaven and Gray is for McMansion Hell. There is an overbearing sheen of 80s optimism. In this house, the credit default swap has not yet been invented, but could be.
It takes a lot for me to drop the cocaine word because I think it's a cheap joke. But there's something about this example that makes it plausible, not in a derogatory way, but in a liberatory one, a sensuous one. Someone created this house to have a particular experience, a particular feeling. It possesses an element of true fantasy, the thematic. Its rooms are not meant to be one cohesive composition, but rather a series of scenes, of vastly different spatial moments, compressed, expanded, bright, close.
And then there's this kitchen for some reason. Or so you think. Everything the interior design tries to hide, namely how unceasingly peculiar the house is, it is not entirely able to because the choices made here remain decadent, indulgent, albeit in a more familiar way.
Rare is it to discover an interior wherein one truly must wear sunglasses. The environment created in service to transparency has to somewhat prevent the elements from penetrating too deep while retaining their desirable qualities. I don't think an architect designed this house. An architect would have had access to specifically engineered products for this purpose. Whoever built this house had certain access to architectural catalogues but not those used in the highest end or most structurally complex projects. The customization here lies in the assemblage of materials and in doing so stretches them to the height of their imaginative capacity. To borrow from Charles Jencks, ad-hoc is a perfect description. It is an architecture of availability and of adventure.
A small interlude. We are outside. There is no rear exterior view of this house because it would be impossible to get one from the scrawny lawn that lies at its depths. This space is intended to serve the same purpose, which is to look upon the house itself as much as gaze from the house to the world beyond.
Living in a city, I often think about exhibitionism. Living in a city is inherently exhibitionist. A house is a permeable visible surface; it is entirely possible that someone will catch a glimpse of me they're not supposed to when I rush to the living room in only a t-shirt to turn out the light before bed. But this is a space that is only exhibitionist in the sense that it is an architecture of exposure, and yet this exposure would not be possible without the protection of the site, of the distance from every other pair of eyes. In this respect, a double freedom is secured. The window intimates the potential of seeing. But no one sees.
At the heart of this house lies a strange mix of concepts. Postmodern classicist columns of the Disney World set. The unpolished edge of the vernacular. There is also an organicist bent to the whole thing, something more Goff than Gaudí, and here we see some of the house's most organic forms, the monolith- or shell-like vanity mixed with the luminous artifice of mirrors and white. A backlit cave, primitive and performative at the same time, which is, in essence, the dialectic of the luxury bathroom.
And yet our McMansion Heaven is still a McMansion. It is still an accumulation of deliberate signifiers of wealth, very much a construction with the secondary purpose of invoking envy, a palatial residence designed without much cohesion. The presence of golf, of wood, of masculine and patriarchal symbolism with an undercurrent of luxury drives that point home. The McMansion can aspire to an art form, but there are still many levels to ascend before one gets to where God's sitting.
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The story in the longetivity pill of cruelty, and Wenyuan's words when being offered to take it wow
#I talk too much#Traces#Fragments and scraps#Not to be 'Jin.gliu's quest' about it‚ but Jingli.u's quest#The way he talks about the pain being all that's left and that being better than nothing?#I think I saved here a few lines by both Jingli.u and Blade quoting also a line in a poem about Orpheu.s precisely playing with this concep#Then there's the vidyadhara mention which is also ehem. It seems also to be a reference to Otto ('a blond scientist'?)?#I was already loving this quest and this chapter in particular before with the ghost of a lost beloved and the similarity with#the Zhuming opera about consuming the beloved (god I just love the Zhuming more and more haha)#but they really included all my favourite things‚ characters and references in this universe#I've been thinking about that Zhuming opera ever since the update dropped to no end precisely due to the fact the Zhuming inhabitants#seem to sort of... live alongside heliobi in a more natural way which is very interesting and again enhances the everconstant idea#of the Xianzhou craftmanship and Abundance going closely together‚ but mainly I've been thinking on the potential ramifications#of the story in the opera. Heliobi seem to 'learn' emotions and pick habits and traits from the people they possess#The opera we are taught has the heliobi consume the lover in a passionate dance and leave‚ and I wondered#I wondered if the beloved knew. I wondered if he cared. I wondered if the heliobi felt anything at all for their husband;#I think I'm more I'm inclined to think they didn't given the fragment of the opera we are shown#But it also made me wonder about other situations in which the lover may have known and/or the heliobi may have developed feelings too#And here it was‚ this small glimpse into what that story could look like. I really loved the story of these two#I'm playing on my secondary account I use to explore different options (the playthroughs are never as thorough as I am)#and here I've captured it‚ but with the full intent of letting them go in my main account#This dialogue was pretty (there were some typos and some weird translations that felt a bit fanon translated though?) and I doubt#letting them go will give me better lines than I got here with Wenyuan clinging to his grief if that's all he has left‚ but I like the idea#of them leaving together. The only thing comparable to being consumed by the grief of losing the beloved is being consumed by love itself#What a magnificent pyre#Oh this mission also made me wonder about Huo Huo. Why does she not get consumed by the mere fact of being constantly in proximity of Tail?#It must not be something intentional because Ruoxi didn't seem to want to consume Wenyuan either. Is it because Tail is sealed?#But if so‚ couldn't they have done that to Ruoxi and Wenyuan? I wonder if they'll explain this later
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GETO SUGURU: ❛❛ SNOWFLAKES IN MY STOMACH WHEN WE KISSIN' ❜❜
.ೃ࿐ your boyfriend can't be home for christmas? fine then, you'll just spend it with his best friend! but be prepared, 'cause your boyfriend's gonna be mad when he gets home. NSFW
contents: fem!reader. modern!au. best friend!gojo. degradation, spanking, p –> v, you guys are loud and you get walked in on! gojo gets slutshamed.. a lot. and he's very annoying!! also there's lots of borderline crack in this fic, have fun with that! 3.6k words, not proofread.
author's note: it's been a hottt minute since i've written for geto and i lowk forgot how to write him.. anyways.
“what do you mean, you’re not coming home for christmas?” you huff, hopping on your bed and lying on your stomach.
the man on the other end of the phone sighs exasperatedly, and you can almost see suguru massage his temples when he replies, “i have work, baby. i’m sorry, but i really can’t miss this chance to—”
it’s the night before christmas eve, and you just learned that suguru won’t be home in time to spend christmas with you—obviously, you were upset, because you’d been looking forward to spending the holidays with him. but to your dismay, holiday season’s always the busiest time of the year for businessmen like suguru.
“fine,” you groan, rolling over onto your back and staring at the ceiling. a soft sigh escapes your lips as you do so, and you mutter something about life not being fair as suguru lists all the reasons he can’t be home by christmas morning.
“i have a big meeting with some potential investors tomorrow, and there’s no way i’ll be back by the morning after,” suguru explains tiredly. you can hear the sleepiness in his voice, but the selfish part of you wants to keep him on the phone longer—it’s only seven, and you could easily spend the next couple hours convincing him to come home sooner.
“but suguru—” you try, even though you know nothing’ll convince him at this point.
“i’m sorry, honey,” he interrupts. after a moment, suguru’s voice softens and he continues, “i just can’t make it home by christmas. we can spend the day after together, though—i think i’ll be free for the rest of the week.”
you roll off the bed, stuffing one hand in the pocket of your hoodie—suguru’s hoodie—as you make your way to the kitchen to grab a mug of hot chocolate. the other hand still holds your phone to your ear, and you swallow back the rest of the protests you have to suguru’s absence.
“anyways, i gotta go,” suguru murmurs, obviously suppressing a yawn. “love you, baby. n’ i’m sorry, but i really can’t do anything about it.”
he hangs up before you can reply.
almost instantly, you dial satoru’s number—he’s probably the only other person you and suguru both trust enough to confide in about your problems, and like always, satoru picks up right away.
“hey, satoru?”
“heyyy, i already heard about it from suguru,” satoru replies, and there’s some suspicious squelching sounds in the background. are those grunts, too?
“uh, what are you doing?” you ask tentatively, hopping on the counter and sitting with your back pressed against the wall. the oddly wet sounds continue for a couple more seconds, and then they stop. “satoru?”
“shit, sorry, i was in the middle of something,” he replies with a breathless laugh. “yeah, i’m done now. wanna see?” your phone lights up with an invitation to facetime, and you hit the ‘x’ immediately.
“no, i don’t want to see whatever the fuck you’re doing,” you grumble, ignoring his laughter. “you’re disgusting, i’ll call you ba—”
“no, i’m free, i’m free!” satoru interrupts, and you can practically hear the smile in his voice as he continues, “suguru won’t be back for christmas, right?”
you pause and sigh, closing your eyes for a second. “yeah, he won’t be.”
“and you want a way to get him to come back sooner, right?”
“yep. you have anything in mind?” you ask, half-hoping that satoru’ll be able to come up with some genius plan to get your boyfriend to fly back here to make it in time for christmas. but if you’re being honest, you know that there are very few things that could convince suguru to drop his supposedly important meeting and come straight home.
and somehow, satoru devises a plan that makes you certain he will.
————
the next morning, you receive a text from suguru asking you to facetime—under normal circumstances, you’d just ask him to call instead since you’re at a cafe, but not today. today, you want him to see you and your mischievous little plan, so you eagerly accept.
“hey, sweetheart,” suguru says the second the call connects. his dark hair is pulled back into its usual half-down half-up style, and he props up his phone on something to use his reflection to adjust his tie. “how are y— wait, is that satoru’s jacket?”
you smile innocently and turn the phone to show satoru, who’s sitting just across from you at the table by the window. after satoru’s taken his time to wave and blow a kiss to suguru (who rolls his eyes in response), you turn the phone back and say, “oh, i just got a little cold. it’s pretty chilly down here!”
suguru frowns, brown eyes narrowing at your cheeky expression. “very funny. why didn’t you just bring your own jacket? or one of mine?”
oh, this is the question you’ve been waiting for. you shrug off satoru’s rather comfortable jacket and show suguru the tight, long-sleeved shirt you’re wearing underneath it. the fabric hugs your skin in a way that shows off all your curves, and even better, it’s a light shade of blue that’s somewhere in between the color of satoru’s eyes and hair.
“i did! but then it just got so cold and satoru was nice enough to offer me his jacket,” you say nonchalantly, pretending not to notice the way suguru’s jaw tightens. you flutter your eyelashes innocently and smile at suguru, thoroughly enjoying the way his eyes focus on your outfit.
“you jealous?” satoru chimes in, snatching the phone out of your hand and posing in front of it, admiring himself in the camera.
“no,” suguru mutters, but it wouldn’t take a genius to tell that he’s just lying through his teeth. satoru grins in response, making a peace sign with his hand and winking.
“good, ‘cause i’m gonna be hangin’ out with her all day long!” satoru cooes, blowing suguru another kiss before you swipe your phone back out of his hand.
“is he joking?” suguru grumbles, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow, seemingly unimpressed. you shrug in response, not buying his cool and collected persona. you know suguru better than most, and the subtle way his shoulders tensed the second he saw you in satoru’s jacket gave it all away.
“nope,” you reply, soft lips tugging themselves into a little smile. “we might spend christmas together too, ‘cause you won’t be here. but i guess i don’t really mind anymore—satoru’s good company!”
satoru covers his mouth to hide his laughter at your comment, giving you a thumbs-up when suguru doesn’t reply. your boyfriend says something about already being late and having to go, and this time, you’re the one who hangs up.
“oh, we definitely got him,” you grin, smugly lifting your mug of hot cocoa and clinking it with satoru’s in a celebratory expression. satoru hums in agreement before he takes a sip of his cocoa, face growing pink at the sudden warmth.
“so, how long d’you think it’ll be until suguru texts you that he’s on his way?” satoru asks, leaning back in his chair and blowing on his cup to cool off the smoking-hot liquid.
“hopefully soon.”
“i’m betting on… three hours.”
three hours later, you don’t get a single text from suguru. four hours later, nothing. on the fifth hour, you finally receive a message from him, but it’s just a “how are you?”
“was that not enough?” you whine, half-looking at your phone as you walk through the mall with satoru. “how else can i convince sugu to come back by tomorrow?”
satoru shrugs, pulling the red lollipop he got from a toy shop’s cashier out of his mouth. “i mean, we tried jealousy, so how ‘bout we go the other route?”
you tilt your head curiously, waiting for satoru to elaborate.
“y’know, why don’t ya tempt him in… other ways?” satoru wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, and your face grows warm despite the chilly air around you.
“satoru…” you pause, face unreadable as you stop walking and turn to him. satoru holds his breath in anticipation, waiting for your verdict.
“that’s a really good idea.”
————
and that’s how you ended up in a clothing store, sifting through hundreds of dresses in search of one that’d be alluring enough to draw suguru back home.
“what color does he like on you?” satoru asks, seemingly oblivious to the strange looks he’s receiving from the other people in the store as he examines handfuls of dresses with interest. “red? black? white?”
you shrug, running your fingers over a form-fitting dress the color of suguru’s eyes. “i dunno, do you think he’d like this?”
satoru turns, takes one look at the dress, and instantly grabs it. “c’mon, let’s get you into a dressing room.”
the second you and satoru get there, the dressing room attendant gives you both a weird look. her eyes settle on satoru, and she asks, “weren’t you just here a week ago with another girl?”
satoru’s face goes redder than you’ve ever seen it. “uh, yeah, i was. oh, this one’s my best friend’s girlfriend, not mine—”
you shove him aside and hand the dress to the attendant, smiling bashfully. “just trying on this one, thanks.”
the attendant eyes satoru suspiciously and then nods. “okay, but he doesn’t get to go inside. last time, we got a noise complaint from the other customers.”
if you thought satoru’s face was red before, now it’s a shade redder than you knew was possible. in fact, you’re almost considering sending him to the hospital to get checked on as you close the dressing room door behind you and try the dress on.
it’s a little tight, but that’s expected given the skin-hugging fabric. after a couple minutes, you turn and admire yourself in the mirror—the dress, thankfully, fits perfectly. the fabric accentuates your features in the best way possible, and it’s all you can do to stop yourself from staring in the mirror any longer.
“how do i look?” you ask, stepping out of the dressing room and doing a twirl for satoru. his jaw drops, and he nods instantly.
“yeah, this is the one,” satoru affirms, taking out his phone. “want me to be the one to send the pics to suguru? that way we can still make him jealous!”
you give him a thumbs-up and blow a kiss at the camera, trusting satoru to take a flattering picture before you head back into the room to change out. on your way out of the store, you buy the dress at the counter—knowing suguru, he wouldn’t reply to satoru’s text, but you just knew he was dying to see you in that in person.
————
later that night, well after satoru’s gone back to his house and you’re relaxing in your own, suguru texts you again.
sugu: can we call?
you grin and roll over onto your back, nestling yourself deeper into your pillows before you dial his number. it only rings once before he picks up, and he instantly asks if satoru’s still with you.
“nah, he went home,” you say offhandedly, toying with the corner of your sheets. “did you like my dress?” you ask coyly, enjoying the way suguru pauses for a long second before replying.
“yeah, it looked good on you.”
“that’s it?”
“it really brought out your eyes.”
you bite your tongue to suppress a groan, instead opting to bury your face in a pillow instead. you had just spent the past twenty-four hours running around in circles, doing everything possible to get suguru to come back, and that’s all you get? really?
“anyways,” suguru continues, and you hear a soft rustling sound in the background—if you had to guess, he’s probably in bed right now. “how was your day, baby?”
“good,” you respond briskly, a soft scowl appearing on your face. suguru, being as observant as he is, picks up on the subtle change in your tone, but he doesn’t say anything. “satoru and i had a really good day. how was yours?”
suguru pauses before answering. “i missed you.”
“then come home, sugu,” you plead, even though you know that there’s no way he’ll be back in time. but it’s worth a try, right?
“you know i can’t,” suguru murmurs, exhaling softly. “no way can i get a flight back this late and make it back by tomorrow morning. i—”
“then get a sleigh!” you huff indignantly, unable to resist smiling when you hear suguru laugh. “please, sugu? christmas won’t be christmas without you.”
“just spend it with satoru,” suguru mutters under his breath, and that’s when you realize that your efforts haven’t entirely been in vain. he’s obviously sour that you spent the whole day with his best friend instead of him, and a small spark of hope starts to fester in your heart.
“maybe i will,” you reply coyly, and you can hear your own smile in your voice—and you’re sure that suguru can hear it too. “anyways, i’m a little tired. good night, baby.”
“night.”
————
the next day, you host a party in your otherwise empty house—after all, it’s christmas, and it’d be rather depressing for you to spend it alone. so you invite satoru, satoru’s friends, and their friends, and so on. word gets around fast, and people show up in droves.
which is why you don’t notice when suguru himself slips in through the back door.
you’re giggling with satoru and his stoic friend kento when they both stop laughing, and you look up at them, confused. “what is it?” you ask, sipping the sweet liquid in your glass with a smile.
“suguru?” satoru asks, lips tugging themselves into a wide smile. “guess you didn’t wanna spend christmas alone, yeah?”
you turn around, half-expecting satoru to be joking. but to your surprise, your dark-haired boyfriend stands in front of you, smiling dryly. you stare at him for a solid two seconds, certain that you’re hallucinating. “sugu? but i thought—”
“thought you could mess around with my best friend?” suguru muses, arching one of his eyebrows. his suit’s a little wrinkled, and his hair’s more disheveled than normal, but somehow, he seems more alert than ever. suguru’s amber eyes go from yours to satoru’s wide blue ones, and satoru shrinks away from him with a nervous smile.
“i’m gonna go,” kento says offhandedly, a glint of amusement in his eyes. he turns and disappears into the crowd, leaving you, satoru, and suguru alone in the living room.
“hey, bro, it was her idea!” satoru says instantly, raising his hands as if he’s a burglar in front of the police. you turn to him in disbelief, scoffing indignantly at his pitiful attempt to get out of trouble.
“no, it was your idea!” you insist, jabbing your finger at satoru. he gasps dramatically and pretends to faint, to which you roll your eyes good-naturedly. you turn back to suguru, rounding your eyes in an attempt to gain his favor. “i swear, sugu, this was all satoru’s idea!”
“you liar,” satoru grumbles, crossing his arms and huffing childishly. you turn and glare at him, and coupled with suguru’s unimpressed look, it’s enough to scare satoru off.
and now it’s just you and suguru, alone in your mint-scented living room. christmas pop plays in the background from another room, and maybe it’s just the dim lighting but you swear you can see suguru’s face go a shade redder than before.
“hey,” you mumble, averting your eyes.
“hey,” suguru replies. he smiles, and just like that, all his features soften. “don’t you want to know how i got here so fast?” he drawls, reaching out and brushing something off your shoulder. his fingers trail down from your shoulder to your collarbone, which is all the more prominent thanks to the dress you’re wearing. incidentally, it’s the same dress you had sent suguru a picture of yesterday—maybe that’s why he can’t take his eyes off you.
“yeah, how did you get here so fast?” you ask curiously, suppressing a shiver as his fingers trace your figure down to your waist. suguru’s eyes go from your dress to your face, and he grins.
“well, i had to leave right before my meeting started and bribe some passengers with a shit-ton of money for their seats,” suguru starts, taking you by the hand and leading you to your shared room. “and believe me, it was a lot of money. and most people still said no, ‘cause they want to be with their families for the holidays.”
he makes a face as he pushes open the door, and stops in his tracks. your face grows warm as you realize that you had set up your room for him too—it’s illuminated with soft candlelight, the linen sheets are changed, and you—oh, you look perfect in suguru’s eyes. it takes a great deal of his willpower to stop himself from fucking you right there and then.
“oh, yeah, it was a lot of money,” suguru continues, smiling down at you coyly. “between the deal i just fucked up and the ridiculous amount of bribes i had to make, i think you owe me.”
suguru makes his way over to your bed and sits, spreading his legs and showing off his growing erection. you grin, following him and sitting in his lap. “did you miss me, sugu?”
“damn right i did.”
and barely a minute or two later, he’s got you face-down ass-up in the sheets, a calloused hand clamped over your mouth to muffle your increasing moans. “shh, wouldn’t want our guests to hear ya,” suguru whispers, breath hot against the side of your face.
you squirm underneath him, mind hazy from the feeling of his dick buried in you for the first time in.. how long? does it matter? “s-sugu, please fuck me,” you mumble, pretending not to notice the way he hasn’t bothered doing anything to you besides use you as his personal cockwarmer.
in the short time he’s been inside you, suguru’s barely moved—and fuck, he enjoys watching you squirm around and beg him to do more than just.. nothing.
“sugu, plea—”
he cuts you off with a slap to your ass, relishing the lewd whine that slips out of your lips in reply. “fuck, you thought y’could get me back here by fuckin’ with my best friend?” suguru cooes, shifting his hips.
“we didn’t—”
“yeah, no shit, baby,” suguru interrupts dryly. “otherwise this’d be a lot worse for you—and for him.”
suguru’s dark eyes flit over to where the dress you bought lies, discarded somewhere in the corner of your room. he grins and uses his hand to turn your head, gesturing at the fabric. “and i bet he was the one who gave you the idea to do whatever the fuck that was,” suguru drawls, clicking his tongue. “tell me, whose idea was it to have him send me that pic? yours, or his?”
when you don’t reply, suguru sighs dramatically and grabs your hair, pulling your head up enough for him to lean down and whisper in your ear, “this’ll be a lot easier for you if you just answer—the—question,” suguru breathes, punctuating each word with another slap to your ass.
“it wasn’t m-mine!” you cry, looking up at suguru with shiny, rounded doe eyes. “i just wanted to—”
suguru cuts you off by pulling out of your drenched cunt just enough to allow him enough space to go back in, and his thrust is harsh and hits all the right places inside of you. your walls clench around him, and shit, suguru realizes that he missed fucking you like this more than anything else in the world.
“fuck, you’re so damn tight,” he hisses, shifting his hips again to allow himself more space to move. “did ya not touch yourself at all while i was gone?”
“n-no,” you stutter, swallowing another pornographic sound from escaping your lips. “i waited for you, sugu,” you gasp, feeling him hit spots you haven’t felt throb in a painfully long time. and fuck, you’re so out of practice that affer just a few thrusts, you’re mewling all over his cock and whining about how you’re close to cumming.
your vision gets speckled with spots of white as thoughts of suguru take up every corner of your mind, even as he teases you for getting so close so fast. but it’s not your fault you’re about to cum faster than you’ve ever done—you’ve tried fucking yourself with your fingers on times when suguru was out for work, but he’s spoiled you with his dick more than you can imagine.
and that’s why you cum all over his cock in what has to be a record-breaking time, tongue lolling out of your mouth as you mumble indecipherable words.
“aw, look at you,” suguru murmurs, stroking your hair as you tremble underneath him. even though it’s unbearably cold outside, it feels scorching hot in here—but maybe that’s because of both of your heaving chests in the aftermath of your orgasm.
“‘m sorry, sugu,” you mumble hazily, and suguru chuckles in response.
“it’s alright, baby,” he responds lightly. “y’know i like fucking your bratty cunt dumb every once in a while, heh.”
you two lie there, basking in each other’s presence for a little while longer before the bedroom door creaks open. and to your horror, satoru stands there, seemingly bored by the whole scene.
“can you two keep it down?” satoru groans, dragging a hand down his face. “we’re trying to have a karaoke competition, but you guys keep going agh—”
suguru hurls a pillow at satoru, cutting off his mocking moan. “you’re next, asshole,” suguru grumbles, getting off of you and covering you with the sheets.
“you’re gonna fuck me next? wow, what happened to hi, hel— oww, okay, i’m going, i’m going!”
#osaemu#geto x reader#geto smut#jjk x reader#jjk smut#geto suguru x reader#suguru geto x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#geto x you#geto x y/n#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#suguru geto smut#geto suguru smut#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen x y/n
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