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siennarowle · 1 year

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dead dove: do not eat

Sienna glanced around the small room when the portkey landed, desperately trying to find Glenda in the dark to no avail. Before she could try and move to her feet, a pair of rough hands grabbed her and forced her into a chair, her short slip riding up before a charmed set of ropes restrained her.

Unsure of how long she sat in the dark, Sienna jumped at the sudden sound of thunderous applause coming from the outside room. Straining in her seat to try and hear what was going on, she heard a somewhat familiar voice rise above the crowds.

"Welcome!" Ludo Bagman's amplified voice spun over the crowd in the outside room. "Welcome. Please, please, in your seats, gentlemen." He stepped up to a podium on the large stage outside of where Sienna was being kept. Sienna could feel heartbeat thunder in time with the applause as Ludo tried to control the crowd. .

Sienna couldn’t help but feel herself start to hyperventilate. She dipped her head between her knees, tears tracking down her cheeks, mouth open wide as she struggled to breathe. One of the guards went to check on her, wrenching her back up.

Outside, Ludo was beginning some kind of opening remarks. They sounded rehearsed. Some propaganda about the days to come. Sienna watched as the guard in the room with her moved towards a door, opening it to watch the proceedings and leaving Sienna with a cracked view of the outside stage.

Sienna looked onstage again, recognizing discarded set pieces as she pieced together that they seemed to be in Muggle London. She’d always wanted to go to a show in Muggle London. When she and Sirius had been together, he’d always promised that one day he’d take her once they were free from the ever present gaze of their parents, but that had never happened. She wondered where Sirius was now. Had he escaped the attack on the school? Or was he somewhere in the building, waiting for whatever was to come just as she was.

Sienna wondered where her brother was. Or whatever was standing in the place of her brother’s body. There was little doubt in her mind that he was out in the crowd tonight. After all, he had a lot to earn from the evening if the appraisal she’d had was anything to go by. Rodolphus was there too, probably.

Was Christopher?

Ever since she’d learned about Rodolphus while engaged to him, she’d always assumed that her brother and closest friend were likely involved to some extent. She never thought they were involved in the way that Rodophus was, but it simply didn’t make sense for them to have avoided it entirely. And if Christopher was in the crowd, did he have a plan to help her? Or was he just as lost as her brother was. In the back of Sienna’s mind, the memory of her appraisal played on repeat with the sinking knowledge of the projected cost being well outside of Christopher’s capabilities, but she didn’t allow herself to give any credence to the thought. She knew that Christopher would find a way.

"We have seventy-seven Lots for auction tonight," Ludo announced magnanimously as Sienna struggled to watch the stage. The crowd erupted.

"Gentlemen, we'll bring each Lot onstage, one at a time. I have here their grading, important facts, and blood status. All Lots sold as is. The winning bidders will coordinate with Walden Macnair at the end to arrange payment."

Sienna let the words wash over her.

"Let's start off the evening right," Ludo crowed. "With a Potter."

The audience screamed, and somewhere in another room Mia thrashed.

Ludo gestured to the other side of the stage, and out of the corner of Sienna’s eye Mia Potter was dragged out, hands stuck together behind her back as she kept her head up defiantly.

Ludo Bagman laughed and beckoned Mia to his side

"Twenty-years-old. Pure-blood. So, if anyone is looking for a blood traitor to play with..."

Ludo chuckled and the crowd hissed.

"Fine muscle mass, as you can see on your parchments. If you need another house elf, this might be your lucky day…although I’m sure there are far better uses that you could find for someone like her."

"Let's start the bidding at 3,000 Galleons."

~*~

“The fuck are we doing in Muggle London?” Christopher grimaced as Thorfinn led him through the streets.

“I told you, you’ll see,” Thorfinn chuckled, ducking out of the alley the pair had apparated into. “It’ll be worth it. I’m certain that you’ll find it particularly interesting.”

Grimacing as Thorfinn beckoned him through an open door of the theatre, Christopher narrowing his gaze as his eyes adjusted to the darkened room as Thorfinn led him to a pair of empty seats.

Whatever sort of show that Thorfinn had brought him to, it already seemed to be well in progress as the pair sat down, and Christopher watched as Ludo Bagman began speaking.

Following Ludo’s gesture, Christopher froze as Glenda Chittock was led on to the stage wearing not much other than a short white slip that did not leave much to the imagination as the stage lights focused on her.

“Thorfinn, what-” Christopher hissed, turning to glance at his friend in confusion. “This isn’t…”

But Christopher was cut off as Thorfinn simply smirked in response and gave a nod as he handed him an auction paddle that he’d had in his robes.

“Thorfinn, that’s your sister’s best friend. We can’t- this isn’t right,” Christopher muttered under his breath, debating whether or not to storm the stage himself.

“What Sienna wants right now doesn’t matter,” Thorfinn replied venomously, shooting Christopher a glare that stunned him into silence.

“Gentleman, we’ll start the bidding at 1500 Galleons,” Ludo Bagman’s voice echoed throughout the theatre, drawing Christopher’s attention back to the stage.

Glancing around, several paddles rose into the air as the bidding began.

“1700 Galleons.”

Christopher watched as a few hands lowered.

“1850 Galleons.”

Christopher watched the bidding continue for a few minutes, paddles lowering and raising as the numbers grew higher, his mind racing with what to do.

“3000 Galleons going once…Twice…” Ludo’s magnified voice echoed through the crowd and before Christopher could second guess himself, he reached for the paddle that Thorfinn had handed him and thrust it into the air.

~*~

Sienna turned her attention back to the stage as the gavel banged.

"Sold!" The audience erupted. "Glenda Chittock, sold to the Rowle party for 6,250 Galleons."

Rowle Party. Thorfinn. Sienna felt bile rise in her throat at the news that her own brother had purchased her closest friend. Before she could stop herself, Sienna threw up between her legs, the sound gaining the attention of the guard that had been assigned to her. The guard took his eyes off of the stage, cursing at the sight of Sienna but decidedly not doing anything to help her.

Suddenly she felt the ropes behind her loosen and someone yanked her to her feet by her hair, maintaining a solid grip as a newly arrived figure led her towards the door to the stage where for the first time she had a solid view of it. Antonin Dolohov made his way on to the stage and secured Glenda’s wrists before being handed a parchment by Ludo Bagman, presumably to sign away his rights to Glenda as having been her original captor. After setting down the quill, Antonin gave Glenda’s backside a final slap as the crowd cheered him on before she was led off of the stage, passing by the doorway that Sienna was being held in.

Their eyes met one final time, Sienna watching as Glenda helplessly tried to convey some piece of wordless information to her with no success as Sienna’s guard quickly yanked her attention back in front of her.

"And now... our grand finale."

It sounded like Ludo Bagman was announcing the Seeker entering the stadium. Perhaps he had? It could be if she just closed her eyes. The theatre thundered.

She blinked, trying to focus. She needed to be present. Maybe once this day was over, she would fall asleep and never wake up.

They pushed her forward, escorting her onstage. Bagman was yelling something over the crowd, but she just squinted against the lights. Someone was operating the theatre spotlight, blinding her to the faces in the crowd as her eyes fought to adjust.

She looked down at her feet as they placed her on a red "X" next to Bagman. Her gold dress shimmered.

She looked up, remembering Mia Potter’s lifted chin. The theatre was full. Balcony after balcony. Must have been over a thousand people, and Sienna despaired at the thought that likely every member of the audience was someone she knew. Perhaps someone she had thought to be a friend. And now they were getting a far better look at her than she would have ever allowed.

The noise continued for ages. Her eyes landed on the masked Death Eaters on the ground level, filling up the majority of the front rows. Some of them on their feet, screaming and taunting and punching their fists in the air. Some of them seated, whispering to each other and pointing to the stage.

She scanned the crowd, looking for her brother.

"Alright! Alright!" Bagman laughed, sounding like his old self again. "I know we're excited. Some of us have special toys to go home to..."

Sienna slid her eyes to Ludo as the men cackled. He'd been seduced by it all. Infected. He met her eyes and quickly looked away.

"Our final Lot of the evening," he announced theatrically. He read off her appraisal notes. "Sienna Rowle."

Hissing. Booing. Jeering.

Much of the crowd were on their feet again, screaming. She heard the words Traitor and Bitch and Kill the slut.

String her up!

—deserves this, the dirty—

Show us her cunt!

Have a bit of fun with her, you will!

Make an example out of her. Sienna knew that this was what was happening. She was a warning to everyone who wasn’t there at how fast things could change if one stepped out of line.

~*~

“What the fuck, Thorfinn,” Christopher hissed, starting to rise to his feet before being roughly pulled back down by his friend.

“She’s made her choice,” Thorfinn snapped. “This is what happens when you step out of line. She knew the consequences.”

“Like hell she did,” Christopher yelled over the screams of the crowd. “You have to stop this. She’ll never forgive us.”

“I don’t care what she thinks,” he said flatly. “This is on her. Not me.”

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Christopher glared, the look of disgust evident in his tone.

“I told you. She made her choice. I told her what would happen if she stepped out of line. She did it anyways.”

“Fine, then. I’ll help her myself,” Christopher snapped, pushing himself out of the seat and away from Thorfinn before he pulled a wand on him. Without thinking, he moved towards an empty seat in the back, fighting the urge to be sick as he watched the scene unfold.

~*~

"Gentlemen, gentlemen," Bagman crooned. He raised his hands to call for peace. "I've not yet begun the bidding. In fact…It seems as though our little pureblooded princess has made something of a mess of herself. How embarrassing for her… What do you say we put her in something a bit more befitting of her personality?"

Laughter.

Sienna stiffened as she felt the familiar tingle of magic on her sullied slip. She glanced down as she watched the slip tighten around her curves, the fabric transfiguring into a translucent white mesh as the neckline began to plunge. With a look of horror, Sienna realized the slip had been transfigured into a makeshift bridal themed teddy.

“Let’s not forget the most important part,” Bagman sang, procuring a white veil that he roughly thrust on to Sienna’s head as the theatre exploded, “After all, we must not forget just how desperate Miss Rowle has always been for a veil of her own.”

Sienna focused her hardened gaze on the crowd, her eyes finding the outlines of two men towards the back of the crowd who were not participating in the outroar. Sienna could feel hear heart begin to race as she began to hope as to who it might be.

Ludo read out her measurements. The crowd cackled when he suggested that she'd do fine in the kitchen, and whooped when he mentioned her muscle mass would be handy in the gardens. They crowed at the thought of her dusting their manors.

Thunder. The acoustics shivering with the applause and screaming. The lonely Death Eater did nothing but cross his leg.

"So, gentlemen... we start the bidding at eight thousand Galleons."

Fifty paddles shot into the air, calling Ludo's attention.

Sienna swallowed as her attention turned towards the front of the crowd, her eyes locking on Rodolphus’s lazy hand in the air.

"Let's weed you out a bit, shall we?" Ludo quipped. "Nine thousand."

Only about five wands dropped.

"Nine-five. Jumping up to nine-five, gentleman," Ludo began.

She watched as wand hands slowly descended, Rodolphus and Mulciber keeping up with each other, laughing at their little game.

Her knees felt shaky, and she wondered if she would be seeing food again anytime soon. Perhaps never.

"Eleven thousand Galleons. Do I hear—Yes, sir, eleven thousand. What about eleven-five?" He pointed to Rodolphus. "Eleven-five to Lestrange. Several others still in. Twelve?"

She let her eyes glaze over, watching the unmoving figure in the back. He sat still, wand in his lap, head supported in his hand. He looked young. Thin shoulders. Tall. If this was in fact Christopher, then why wasn’t he doing anything?

"Twelve-five? Yes, Twelve-five to Mulciber. Do we have—?"

"Fifteen thousand." A tense voice. A voice that Sienna knew better than nearly anyone. Sienna blinked as every person in the first three rows turned to look at the figure in the back. He'd raised his paddle.

Whispers and shuffling. She knew that Mia Potter had just sold for a bit more than that.

"Er, yes. Fifteen thousand to..."

"Fifteen-five," Rodolphus snarled, sending a glare back at the younger man.

"Sixteen," from the fourth row.

"Sixteen-five."

"Seventeen."

"Twenty!" Rodolphus stated firmly, like he’d ended a game of cards, irritated with Christopher.

The theatre was buzzing. Most of the crowd had figured out that it was Christopher Flint who was throwing his money against Rodolphus Lestrange.

"Do I hear twenty thousand five?" Ludo asked, speaking up again.

Rodolphus’s paddle shot in the air. Christopher’s followed.

"Twenty-three" Rodolphus grinned, his eyes locking on to Sienna’s.

She wasn't sure if it was the warm stage lights or the future bearing down on her, but Sienna felt her lungs begging for air.

She'd known that this would happen. That she'd be leaving with someone like Rodolphus. In the back of her mind, she'd been mentally preparing for a week. Even so, her hope hadn't died.

She'd felt a spark of possibility when she’d heard Christopher’s voice. But now, as he hesitated before yelling, "Twenty-three five," she wished he'd never jumped in at all. The inevitable heartbreak of his loss was something she didn’t think she would ever recover from.

"Twenty-eight," said Rodolphus, chuckling at her expression.

Ludo was white next to her as he waited. "I hear twenty-eight thousand," he said at last. The crowd started twisting, buzzing with whispers. "Do I hear twenty-nine?"

She didn't dare look at Christopher. Couldn't bear the idea that if she looked, she might see the realization in his face that this was far beyond what he could afford. The way he would hold that guilt in his shoulders. Maybe she could pinpoint his thoughts like she had growing up as they worked on potions homework, when he'd roll his shoulders back and reset his posture before diving back into his cauldron.

"Twenty-eight thousand going once."

Or the way he'd stare at the chalkboard in transfiguration, tilting his head towards her as he would silently reassure her that he’d help to explain the lesson later on.

"Twenty-eight thousand going twice."

Or in seventh year, when he'd spent much of the first weeks at school keeping her company as she avoided the halls where Sirius might be.

A gavel banged.

The world cracked open, and a violent sound poured into her ears like lava.

Her eyes on the "x" beneath her feet as Rodolphus ignored protocol and jogged up onstage and met a blank-faced Thorfinn in the middle. The scroll. A burning on her left arm. And then a fist in her hair, dragging her head back. Rodolphus was there, grinning down at her. He licked her face and the balconies went wild.

She didn’t dare move, her palpable fear causing her to freeze. She could tell how much he loved that.

He laughed, grabbing her head to push her down to the floor. When she looked up from her knees, Rodolphus was smirking at the audience, basking in his victory, and unbuckling his belt.

She recoiled, shaking her head.

Thorfinn had a slight look of disgust at the sight, shoving him back lightly as he handed him the parchment. "Not until I get my money, Lestrange."

She couldn't make out sounds anymore. Too much in her ears.

As Rodolphus wrenched her up, throwing her to the backstage guards, she chanced one last look to see the crowd on its feet, one seat in the back row now empty.

#on the off chance someone who isn't julia finds this #it is for julia and julia alone #and if anyone from [redacted] ship finds it #it's for private use #obviously all ideas go to the og #christopher sienna: dead dove au

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rayleearts · 3 months

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When love so much

You can join my patreon this month to get him as a sticker :)

#myart #realta #webcomic #comic #Walden #crow #walden the crow #crows #crow art #cute art #illustration #rayleearts

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cilis-readings · 1 year

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Hi, friend. I'm quite curious about your entity readings. My practice has stalled lately and I'm not sure who or what to reach out to. Reading cards for myself hasn't been helpful. No preference for a category or pantheon, just wondering what pings. Thanks in advance!

hello friend! here’s what i got for you :)

decks used: the cosmic slumber tarot by tillie walden and the urban crow oracle by mj cullinane

cards pulled: the devil and wrath

okay so when the devil card popped out i initially thought this was baphomet coming through for you, but after consulting with my pendulum this is actually lucifer! now lucifer is a very . convoluted entity? yeah i think that’s the right way to put it. he originally started out as a minor roman deity — the personification of the planet venus, then he was appropriated by christianity in a way that turned him into “the devil” so to speak.

his message to you today is wrath. he wants you to feel your anger. don’t hold back for the sake of others comfort, you’re allowed to feel every single emotion humans can produce, including anger and wrath!

#my readings #answers #tarot #tarot reading #free tarot reading #oracle #oracle reading #free oracle reading

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popculturebrain · 5 months

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deadlinecom · 5 months

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littlescaryinternetguy · 6 months

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What are some songs you like to listen to for chilling yourself out when anxiety or other feelings are getting you wound up?

Also how do you turn on the stereo when you are so small?

All very good questions. Very much in the ol' wheelhouse for the big tiny Irish-ish fairy. Last things first: I have a sledgehammer. Like, my size. I mean, for people my size, it isn't my size, that would be silly. But I have a teeny tiny adorable little sledgehammer. And I can usually whack the buttons on the remote control hard enough to get it to work. Beyond that, I'll perform the occasional atomic elbow, but I'd rather not because what if someone walks in and sees me? It would be the nineteenth most embarrassing thing someone has seen me do that day! Actually, to be honest, it's just kind of tiring.

OK. Songs I like to listen to in order to chill. Well. I got a wide range, friendo. Do I want to chill and remain at full speed? Do I want to chill and remain awake? Do I want to chill all the way out and pass out? Cuz I got about thirty of each, but my brain rattles around my tiny little skull like a BB in a dried gourd so I'll just share a couple.

Chill and remain at full speed? You'll find nothing better than this one.

As you can guess, it's pipe organ, it's brass. The organ gives it enough of an edge, especially on that first track. Play it soft and you're in some sort of zone. Play it loud and you can beat up a moose. After the title track, you get a little come-down, but not enough to lose your focus.

If I wanna chill and just be, which is a pleasant way to be:

youtube

This is an album from one of the great public avant-garde musicians of the turn of the century, but don't let that fruit you out: this is his take on John Fahey (an icon in his own right whom O'Rourke worked with closely near the end of his life) and Jack Nietzsche, so you've got an ultra-placid piano meditation sliding into beautiful fingerpicked guitar waltzing with an arrangement of pedal steel and French horn that feels like you're rolling gently down a hill in spring, and that's just the first two songs. Stay all the way to the end to hear why his pedal steel session guy asked him, "You seriously want me to play that? But that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard." It works. Trust the man. Plus that first song is called "There's Hell in Hello But More in Goodbye" and ain't that the truth.

Now, if I want shutdown? Oh, I got you.

You know what an Aeolian harp is? They're wires of varying lengths strung taut so that, when wind blows past them, you get a precise tone (depending on the length of the wire) that can range from a gentle hum to a piercing whistle. Fairies LOVE these things. If you're ever out, way out, in nature, listen for them. Beneath the birds and the rustle and the sigh, you'll hear them. Well, Thoreau liked them too, and he couldn't have been wrong about everything. At his crib in Walden, there's a number of Aeolian harps of varying pitch, and a gentleman went along and recorded them in a number of conditions, from a still summer afternoon to a thunderstorm coming in. And of course with it you got crows, flies, my cousin Len (who never got paid for the session but Len is an asshole so whatever), and rain. You can meditate to it, you can do whatever. Even better, you can LISTEN to it. Listen closely. There's so many tiny sounds there. Listen to us.

PS: If anyone can tell an old dork how to embed Bandcamp players, that'd be swell.

#ask a fairy #time will vindicate me #lsigmusic

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carolinemillerbooks · 6 months

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New Post has been published on Books by Caroline Miller

New Post has been published on https://www.booksbycarolinemiller.com/musings/a-paeen-to-humility/

A Paeen To Humility

If life feels frustrating, there’s a reason. Frustration is a condition throughout the universe. Even electrons are vulnerable. Because an imbalance exists between the places for them in one layer of the quantum soup and another, each time the layers interact, the quantum particles must scramble for positions like players in a game of musical chairs. Though existence is hard for electrons, scientists suspect they can use that frustration to increase reliability when encoding digital information. In politics, frustration is a boon for antacid manufacturers. Each new poll in our divided nation sends many to the drugstore. Current tallies for the 2024 election show Donald Trump leads Joe Biden by a few percentage points, a difference that keeps Democrats awake at night worried about the return of a failed president whose agenda is political revenge. Logic suggests the polls are wrong. In 2020, Joe Biden defeated Trump by 7 million votes. Is it reasonable to suppose that 4 years later, these 7 million find Trump’s 91 felony charges an asset? Should we suppose that women, even in red states like Kansas, Kentucky, Michigan, and Ohio, who have voted to enshrine abortion rights into their state constitutions will find Trump’s call for a national ban irresistible? People are more complex than the polls can reflect, it would seem. This morning, a friend in California surprised me with a phone call. We haven’t met for several years but we’ve stayed in touch with birthday cards and holiday messages. He opened our conversation with a few lines from my memoir, Getting Lost to Find Home. His speech sounded urgent, as he feared I’d missed the importance of what I’d written. Afterward, he thanked me for reminding him that friendships needed nurturing, and he resolved to do better with ours. The sweetness of his remark stuck in my throat like a lump of hard candy. I doubted my friend could have foreseen the feeling of communion that rose within me or fathom the compliment he’d paid me by reading my words with feeling. When our conversation ended, I returned to the blog I was writing, compulsively, the way a crow returns to a crust of bread at the side of the road once traffic has subsided. My thoughts returned to an interview with David Brooks I’d just read. (“Q&A,” AARP Bulletin, Nov. 23, pgs. 40-41.) Brooks is a columnist whose political views are more conservative than mine. Many times, I’ve crushed his commentaries from my easy chair, though he never knew it. Even so, over the years, he seemed to have mellowed, and I am gratified that in his interview, he confirmed my assessment. I’ve learned to be more relational and humbler, he confesses. Time’s passing has a way of changing perspective. For example, I have rid myself of the notion that humans rule the planet. As a species, we are no more in control of the ground beneath our feet than were David Thoreau’s warring red and black ants in Walden Pond. China’s Xi Jinping and Russia’s Vladimir Putin may imagine otherwise and hope to find a place for themselves in the pantheon of great leaders. More likely the pain and distrust they sow will grow like graveyard weeds to one day blot out their memory. Jews and Palestineans are at war again, the historical residue of tyrants and old men bent in prayer who exhort their followers to slaughter non-believers. Do these disparate sides not see the absurdity of that call? No other mammalian slaughters its own in greater numbers than our species. That isn’t Nature’s way. It is human vainglory. With both sides drenched in the blood of their enemy, the time has come for all to see no triumph lies in war. A dead child pulled from the rubble of a bombed building is the universal source of human tears. We can do better. Let there be no more learned hate. Frustration may exist in the universe, but we can choose our response. We either yield to it or build a wall of defiance. If we choose the latter, let imagination be the bricks of our fortress and communion its mortar. When we fill the cracks between oblivion in service to one another, we give our frail and inauspicious species primacy and establish compassion as human law throughout a deaf, dumb, and blind cosmos.

#abortion rights #communion #David Brooks #David Thoreau #Donald Trump #frustration in the universe #Geting Lost to Find Home #Israeli/Palestinian war #learned hate #political polls for 2024 election #the politics of revenge #vainglory #Vladimir Putin #Walden Pond #Xi Jinping

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