guys editing this wuthering heights video is so much work it's been like two months of me working on this (when u take into account me watching all of these versions, rereading the book, reading the articles, and now filming and editing)....... if nobody watches this at least a little bit i'll be so sad 😭

I've heard of ppl complaining about ur writing speed and posting schedule but it's honestly ridiculous. like you actually write insanely fast. it is incredible that you have managed to write over 150,000 words (in very high quality writing might I add 🫶) in like 10 months !!

thank u lol honestly i feel like i’ve had relatively little bs 2 deal w compared 2 the flack i’ve seen some other fic writers get etc but i have def like. had conversations w some other fic writers abt how strange it feels 2 get people immediately commenting on chs like “when will the next ch be out?” or sending messages etc asking abt posting schedules…idk i have conflicted feelings bc on the one hand im like well maybe i just did this 2 myself by having unusually fast & consistent posting schedules at various points w past fics but on the other hand i do try 2 make it v clear when like. my posting is gonna slow down…& also i v much do not think it should be considered standard 4 people 2 be updating wips weekly or monthly etc like when i was writing a fic 4 a different fandom before i joined this one i took like a four month break in the middle of posting w no warning & no one complained abt it lol.

& it’s also like. i do understand that none of those comments/messages etc r ill intended & usually people will tack on a little ‘no pressure!’ but unfortunately i am going 2 pressure myself regardless…which i have had 2 actively work on bc i was like. i cannot keep stressing myself out over arbitrary deadlines i set for something that’s supposed 2 be a hobby!! so i might just be extra sensitive abt it now & if one of those messages catches me on a day where im stressed abt other stuff etc (frequent occurrence recently lol) then like. no matter how nicely it’s phrased it still doesn’t feel nice. & i understand wanting 2 know but i also don’t think u should read a wip unless ur actually prepared 2 a) deal w the story however it goes [separate complaint that i’ve been discussing w my fic writing friends lmao] and b) wait however long it takes 4 chs w no expectations abt regularly-scheduled posting. so!

anyway not sure 2 what extent this is like a new phenomenon or expectations have actually changed…one friend who’s been like. writing fic way longer than i have told me they do feel like there’s been a sort of shift across various fandoms w this new expectation that fic writers r posting regularly quickly & consistently. like maybe bc fic has become more ‘mainstream’ etc there are an influx of people who r bringing in new standards that sort of echo what they’d expect 4 other forms of media but like. when u take a step back & think abt it it’s a little wild 2 want or expect some random guy 2 be providing u w weekly entertainment for free…have seen a few people being like “ugh we need a new big wip that everyone’s reading & talking abt” & im like. oh so u want someone 2 kill themself lmao like everyone i know who’s had their fic treated like the fandom’s ~tv show~ that they tune in for every week has had a horrible horrible time lol

it's so exhausting bc basically just existing as a woman means you're a target of sexual harrassment. like just going on a walk in nature or going to your physiotherapy session and a man sees you he'll sexually harrass u. just exisitng online is an invitation for men who come across u to sexually harrass u. there's nothing u can do to stop their advancements bc u havent done anything to invite or instigate it. your mere existence is what provokes them to exert their power over u. there's no escape. no reprise. nothing u can do. just knowing that waiting behind any corner is a guy ready to sexually harrass (or even worse sexually assault) u is heartbreaking. the times it's happened to me wont be the last and many many occasions are awaiting me in the future. nothing to be done abt it. all i can hope is that the damage wont be too bad so i can at least keep functioning after. it feels like walking in a mine field and constantly being on edge and ready for it to blow up in your face

Do u guys think Cheavy was intentionally coded as homophobic in the tf2 comic or not

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its late so i can admit this. i'm actually a big p1 foreman oyun fan. i am so deeply fascinated by him i want to put him under a michaelscope ive loved his character since his introduction *has complaints abt his p2 portrayal. Again*

the way ppl approach discourse on twitter is crazy 😭 like i'm halfway through arguing in circles w someone who disagreed with a lote take i posted and i just told them "i don't care to argue anymore" JGDJD

guys. guys !!!!

dad is here and the ache of Wishing I Had A Relationship With My Dad returns

Why does no one ever take u seriously, I've been living in this body for 25 yrs I kno what I'm feeling and experincing and when things are wrong, I don't want attention, fuck Idec about myself that much but I'm not making shit up, why am i screaming into the goddamn void

this is not an airport u do not need to announce ur departure etc etc

my brothers gf is coming with us to dinner tonight and i feel so bad for her having to meet my dad and my nan at the same time 😭 god save her

i understand it's an issue of wanting to relate to people and not wanting to be left out but there has got to be a better way of trying to fit in

when the very small amount of people in my life who know i’m a lesbian still talk about me dating guys 😃 like

in 0 gran news, i wrote up an intro thing for a sino blog cuz i Knew id regret it if i didnt write it down but. u know those blogs where u just wanna do one(1) thing and not develop anything. yeah

past 5 days. hmm