#top gun meta hell
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Thinking about Goose’s cross necklace thinking about Christianity uh oh thinking about Goose’s cross and Christianity and top gun
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Red Knight - Chapter 1
DP x DC | Dead on Main
Jason Todd encounters one Danny Fenton in the streets of Gotham and suddenly he's thrown into a world of ghosts and monsters. Will he embrace this life? Or will it just end up with him dead again?
Read on AO3 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4
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“Why are you following me?” Jason pressed his arm against the stranger’s throat, pinning him to the alley wall.
Under the sodium glow of the streetlight Jason got his first good look at the guy. Tall, dark hair, maybe his age or a little younger. Not the type he typically saw in the Narrows- he lacked that certain air of despair. The stranger had been following Jason since he’d left his safe house. Maybe the guy thought Jason would be an easy mugging target. Wasn’t he in for a surprise.
The stranger lifted his face and smiled. His blue eyes glowed with a green ethereal light. “How long have you been dead?”
He said it with the casual nonchalance of talking about the weather. Jason tensed, pressing harder on his arm. How the hell did this guy know?
The guy didn’t flinch. He didn’t seem bothered at all. That could only mean one thing.
Jason steadied his breath. “Metas aren’t welcome in Gotham.”
“I’m not a meta. And neither are you. But that doesn’t mean we’re totally human either.”
The stranger tilted his chin up, his smile broadened. Behind his lips he revealed a pair of fangs glinting, taunting.
From nowhere Memories of the pit stirred under Jason’s heart— rage and pain and fear. His pulse raced faster. His arm pressed harder.
As if responding to the pressure the guy’s face softened. “Oh. It’s worse than I thought.” He sounded genuinely concerned. “What the hell happened to you?”
“Shut up!” Somehow the pity stung worse than the taunts.
Jason pulled his fist back to punch the look off the guy’s face, but he didn’t get the chance to. The guy went translucent. He moved through Jason’s arm like a ghost but then suddenly his hands were solid against his chest, pushing with surprising force, sending him stumbling backward to the slimy concrete.
He fell prone and then the stranger was on top of him. Adrenaline flashed through him- too late. His breath clogged in his throat as cold clutch of power hit him. The strangers face twisted in concentration as he put a hand to and then through Jason’s chest.
The fury of the pit raged and roared, nearly as loud as it had when Jason had taken those first screaming breaths back alive. Jason fought, punching and clawing but the guy held form, unshakable. His ears rang and pain sang through his whole body and it felt like he was turning inside out and then—
Quiet.
Quiet, empty relief.
He breathed out. A cool weight sat heavy under his heart where previously there had been a nest of scorpions.
Jason’s mouth fell open. The guy pulled his hand back with a sigh and stood up.
“That should help I think.”
Jason looked down at his chest- unscathed. A thousand questions scrolled through his head. The one that made it out of his lips: “What the fuck?”
The guy shrugged as he stepped back. “Gotta look out for you. You’re one of mine.”
One of mine. Those words sent a shiver through Jason. This guy was obviously a dangerous meta. Jason had been embarrassingly helpless to stop him doing whatever it was he just did. Time for some answers.
Jason rolled up to a fighting crouch and pulled a handgun from his belt. He leveled its comforting weight at the not-meta meta. “I don’t belong to anybody.”
The stranger’s smile came back, and so did his fangs. Jason bit his tongue.
The guy pulled a scrap of paper out of his pocket and scrawled for a moment, completely nonplussed by the gun pointed at him. “Call me if it gets bad again?”
Jason didn’t move. He gripped the gun tighter. “Who are you?”
Still that smile. “I’m Danny.”
And then he vanished. Not a Batman fade-into-the-shadows type of vanish. One second he was there and the next- nothing but air. The paper he’d written on fluttered down to the ground in the place where he’d stood.
Jason lowered the gun. He got up to walk away, ready to chalk up the whole experience to some meta bullshit he didn’t want to think about again.
But a new weight sat heavy in his chest. The quiet lingered in his head. Whatever that guy did, it made him feel more calm, more in control of himself than he had in a long time. Halfway through that thought the wind picked up and threatened to blow the paper away. Jason’s stomach dropped as he scrambled to catch it. He closed his fist around it just as it reached the street.
He uncrumpled it between his fingers. A phone number, nothing else. On the other side— a receipt for bat burger. What the fuck.
#dpxdc#dp x dc#dc x dp#danny phantom#jason todd#dead on main#danny x jason#dead on main ship#dp x dc fanfic#fanfic#dp#yes this is just me mashing all my favorite tropes and prompts into one big fic#rough draft is basically done now let's see how fast I edit#l m a o
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Aziraphale's talk with the Metatron
Another unhinged meta post for the Aziraphale Defense Squad. I will continue to defend him hardcore until fandom starts recognizing him as his own person and not a prop for Crowley's character. Welcome to my opinion on the Final Fifteen!!
Hell came to Earth.
Aziraphale blew up his halo while surrounded by Hell.
Aziraphale declared a war on Hell at the exact moment Crowley was in Heaven uncovering Heaven's secrets.
There was a door to Heaven opened through the bookshop and who knows what in the Discorporated Demon the guy at the other end of that door was getting.
Enough to get The Metatron's attention and for him to witness Aziraphale declare war on Hell while his demon boyfriend breaks into Heaven's top secret files and learns that Heaven is holding their rebellious angels hostage.
He doesn't give Aziraphale a chance to say no to Heaven, and Aziraphale is pissed off about it.
Aziraphale DID NOT SAY YES EITHER. It is so very important that people understand this. The Metatron did not give Aziraphale a choice. Aziraphale had to choose the best way to handle a hopeless situation.
I think Aziraphale is waiting for Crowley to get the hint.
Crowley broke into Heaven. He broke into Heaven. He uncovered secrets. Saraqael showed him the trial. He knows the truth.
Aziraphale almost started a war to protect Gabriel.
The Metatron had to intercept that last transmission because Crowley and Aziraphale are powerful enough to shield Earth from both sides.
Remember that during the Bullet Catch scene, Aziraphale asked a group of soldiers to raise their hands if they had experience using firearms. Crowley is the only one who did not raise his hand because he had never fired a gun before.
Now we get to the present, and The Metatron is basically telling Aziraphale that Crowley is not only a threat but there is evidence of the fact that they have been working together for 6,000 years and that he prevented Crowley's arrest by Hell in 1941.
As far as The Metatron is concerned, Aziraphale just committed an act of treason because it helped Crowley get out of Heaven safely with highly classified information.
He didn't know Crowley was in Heaven. Crowley never came back and it made him fear the worst, but then he's showing up with Heaven right after and that only makes it a bigger problem.
Aziraphale chose to keep the peace instead of allowing one side or the other to arrest Gabriel and Beelzebub. He let the former Supreme Archangel and former Grand Duke of Hell escape from their duties. He gave them a choice. They were never supposed to know those choices existed in the first place.
The way that The Metatron said "so predictable" when Nina told him that no one ever asked for Death. The invisible choice. The name of the coffee shop is used as a threat against Aziraphale.
Aziraphale's choice in this situation involved how he chose to present it to Crowley.
Crowley was asking to get his flat back after Shax made the plan to go back to Hell. He was already planning to take Aziraphale to the Ritz to celebrate by getting really drunk. He was fine.
Nina and Maggie's last minute interception got him all hyped up to finally make a love confession.
But please FOR THE LOVE OF GOD can we please try to remember that AZIRAPHALE NEVER SAID YES EITHER.
He seems to be turning himself in and trying to protect Crowley, and only realizes at the end that the Metatron plans to use him against humanity.
Crowley and Aziraphale were not having the same conversation. They were not having the same conversation. They were not having the same conversation.
Aziraphale is terrified. Look at the nervous smile and the way he is so confused as to why Crowley is mad at him. He's trying to tell Crowley he needs helps because he's in trouble.
He said he didn't want to go back to Heaven. He made this clear when he was speaking to Crowley.
He knows the things he is saying are contradictory to what he's learned, and he's needing Crowley to pick up on that. He's trying to tell Crowley that he can't protect him from Hell this time anymore than Crowley can protect him from Heaven because The Metatron knows they've been working together for 6,000 years and are now in a position to reveal Heaven's institutional problem.
Stop getting mad at Aziraphale for not saying no and start asking yourself why some of you refuse to acknowledge the fact that Aziraphale did not say yes to the Metatron either.
Especially knowing that Crowley did not say "yes" or "no" to Hell's offer in The Arrival either.
This isn't an angel who is happy to go back to Heaven. This is an angel begging his best friend to help him because he doesn't have a choice, and not understanding that Crowley thinks Aziraphale is rejecting him and Aziraphale is telling him he no longer has a choice.
He no longer has a choice and now Crowley is upset with him and he's still trying to figure out what just happened.
Aziraphale is going to get up there and cause some trouble though.
#good omens#good omens meta#aziraphale defense squad#aziraphale#crowley#final fifteen#behold my opinion on aziraphale's perspective#i love crowley#but there is more than one conversation happening#more than one story#more than one perspective
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Son of the Red Hood: Reunions and First Meetings
Master Post
Jason was once again at the end of his rope. He had this wonderful, amazing kid in his life who could fly and float through walls, and influence his Pit Rage, and smiled like the sun, and all in all was still a kid. And sometimes kids threw fits.
He had taken Danny to an abandoned and fenced off lot so the kid could get some practice with his powers where no one would see them. He hadn’t wanted Danny’s toys to be forgotten or dirtied in the lot, so he had made sure to leave behind his stuffed animals. Something Danny had taken incredible offense to.
Of course the tyke hadn’t realized until they were in the abandoned lot, blocks away from Jason’s apartment that his toys had been left behind. And he was now bawling his eyes out, screaming at the top of his lungs for his toys. He was once again starkly reminded that Danny was a meta and many of his powers were tied to his emotions. Jason could only feel sympathy for what the Kents had to deal with when they were raising Clark. They even had to deal with a super powered toddler’s terrible twos.
“I want my Jazztronaut! I want my Wonder Bear!” Danny screamed.
Each scream rattled the walls around them and set off distant car alarms. Jason had brought his Red Hood gear so that if anyone saw them they wouldn’t recognize them and he was thankful he had as the sonic protections in the helmet activated and muffled his hearing. Though the fact that he could still hear his kid over the protections showed just how loud Danny could be.
“I promise kiddo, we can go back and grab your bears! I’ll grab them as soon as I can, but you have to calm down.” Jason tried to reason, but one thing he knew from helping with the street kids in Crime Alley, sometimes a child just doesn’t want to be reasoned with.
“I want Wonder Woman! I want Wonder Woman!” Danny shrieked even louder.
Jason clamped his hands uselessly over the ear holes of his helmet as he staggered back. Holy shit this kid had a pair of pipes on him. If he didn’t have his helmet on he might be deaf now.
“Danny, I’m sorry I forgot your bear.” Jason tried again, and Danny fell silent in surprise. He sniffed and his lip wobbled. What the hell was this kid’s life that someone apologizing to him got this kind of reaction?
“I’m sorry I yelled.” Danny whispered back, tears running down his face, though he was tense like he expected to be yelled at or worse.
“Hey, it’s ok buddy.” Jason pulled his helmet off and he pulled the kid into his lap. “Sometimes your emotions can get too big for your body, I understand that. I really am sorry that I didn’t bring your bears. I’ll go get them soon, ok? But I can’t leave you alone to grab them.”
“Perhaps I can be of some help?”
Jason tensed as a woman’s voice sounded in the lot. He shifted Danny so he was protecting him with his body as a tall woman with black hair approached. She had greasy and sweat stained work out clothes, just like every other thug in the city, but she towered over him where he was sitting on the ground. He reached as subtly as he could for his gun, then paused as she stepped into the light.
“Wait, Aunt Diana?” Jason asked, perplexed.
“Hello, little Warrior.” Diana said with a small smile. Then she knelt down next to Danny. “And hello you too, little King.”
Danny, his little devilish meta child, actually blushed at her attention.
“I’m not a king yet.” He said softly.
“I know. And yet I have followed your call for me and found you.” Diana said with all the gravitas she reserved for meeting foreign diplomats.
“I thought I knew what was happening, but now I’m not so sure.” Jason said softly before he rose to his feet, lifting Danny onto his hip.
“I’m not certain I can explain everything, but I can shed some light.” Diana said, standing as well, before addressing Danny. “Are you aware of someone by the name of Clockwork?”
Danny’s eyes lit up and started glowing as he smiled.
“Grandpa Clocky! He’s always tellin’ me boring things that I need to do and learn. But he keeps me safe and cares about me.”
“Yes, well your grandfather has a few other grandchildren, one of which is me.” Diana held her hand out and shook Danny’s little, tiny hand. “Diana Prince. Some call me Wonder Woman.”
Danny’s eyes glowed even brighter and he floated out of Jason’s arms.
“So we’re like cousins! Or something!”
“Yes. Or something. And Clockwork sent me to find you, so you can be trained properly for when the crown is yours.”
Jason genuinely couldn’t tell if Diana was being serious or if she was playing along, but either way he was grateful that she had appeared when she did and even more grateful that she seemed to be willing to help train Danny.
“Thank you so much Aunt Diana.” Jason said with a smile. “Maybe you and I can talk about a training schedule together. In the meantime would you mind watching him while I go and grab the teddy bears that caused all this?”
“Of course. My cousin and I will get to know each other.” Diana said and gave Danny a warm smile.
Jason pulled his grapple and left to return to his apartment, happy with the knowledge that Danny was safe with Diana. Though he had a lot of questions about why she had called him a king, and who the hell Clockwork was.
.
Jazz had been on the move almost non stop ever since she had woken up yesterday. Her parents were dead. The portal in Amity was destroyed. Angela had said that Danny was killed by the blast too. But he wasn’t. She knew he wasn’t. She didn’t need the boo-merang to tell her that Danny was still out there somewhere. He was alive, and she would find him.
She had only stopped moving long enough to pass out in her car for a few hours during the drive to Gotham City. She was following a faint trail, a mere pressure in her mind that was leading her closer and closer to where her brother was. Whatever ecto contamination her parents had done to her over the years had given her a connection to her brother and she would follow that connection to the very jaws of hell itself if she had to.
She was running on fumes now. So was her car. She had made it into Gotham and the pull brought her to one of the poorer neighborhoods. In fact it looked like it was the poorest and most crime ridden part of the city. Graffiti covered every wall, and multiple burnt out wrecks of cars littered the sides of the streets.
Jazz slammed on the brakes and opened her car door. She was next to an abandoned and fenced off lot and her brother was here. She could feel him. She dashed tears and sweat from her eyes, slung her weapons over her shoulder and tied her hair back. When she left her car she left it with the door open and the key in the ignition. She doubted it would start again and she didn’t care enough, all she cared about was her brother.
She crouched next to the fence and leaped, putting her ectoplasmic strength into the jump as she easily cleared the twelve foot tall fence. She landed on the other side in another crouch, her eyes zeroing in on the woman standing in the middle of the lot.
The woman was easily as tall as Jazz and she was 6'8" thanks to the ectoplasm in her veins. The woman had long black hair and was built like an absolute tank. She was wearing work out clothes that showed off all of her muscles. If Jazz were in a better mental state she would be jealous.
But all she could focus on was the toddler just past the woman. The small, black haired, blue eyed boy that was her entire world. Danny. He was younger and smaller than he should be, but she would recognize him anywhere, and she had enough experience with ghostly shenanigans to recognize a simple deaging. She could deal with that later, now she just needed to recover her brother.
“Give him to me!” Jazz demanded as she stormed closer.
The beefy woman was between her and Danny, she couldn’t risk angering her, but all the words were trapped in her mind. All the deescalation techniques she learned, all the psychology she dedicated herself to, was all trapped and stuck. The woman turned to face her and Jazz pulled out her creep stick, her hands shaking.
“Give him to me.” She said again, the words feeling like nails dragging past her throat yet it was all she could say.
“I’m afraid I can’t do that.” The woman said. She kept her hands open and spread apart. Some small part of Jazz’s mind said that she was trying to keep her body language open and friendly. But that part was overshadowed by her fear and her exhaustion.
“Give him to me!” She shrieked, wondering if she should be coughing up blood with how difficult the words were to drag out. She dashed forward and swung her creepstick. The woman blocked the blow with her forearm, but Jazz swung again and again. Each blow the woman either blocked or dodged without any visible effort.
“You have skills sister.” The woman said and she went on the attack.
Now Jazz was getting driven back across the lot. She was clearly out matched in every possible way, but she couldn’t back down. That was her brother. That was her brother. That was her brother. Danny. Danny. Danny.
The woman twisted her body and with a powerful kick the creepstick was sent flying across the yard. Jazz didn’t give her a moment to gloat at disarming her and instead pushed forward with her bare fists and legs, using all her skill with martial arts, managing to push the other woman back one step at a time. Still she looked calm and confident as if she did this every single day.
Jazz ducked under one of the woman’s blows and managed to pull her knife. She thrust the blade forward with all her might, putting her full ectoplasm enhanced strength behind the blow. And watched in horror as the blade shattered against the woman’s shoulder.
“Well struck!” The woman seemed genuinely impressed. Then she twisted and almost without effort threw Jazz to the ground.
Jazz gasped in air as she stared up at her, then passed her to where her brother hovered in the air, watching like this was all an exciting movie.
“Please.” She forced the word out, like broken glass down her throat. “Give him to me.”
She begged. Desperately. The woman startled and pulled a long rope from under her sweats. With a flick of her wrist the cord wrapped around Jazz’s body.
“We’ll soon find the truth of this. Why do you want the boy?”
The cord glowed around her and even past her pain and her fear and her exhaustion the words came.
“He’s my brother.”
She gasped the words out.
“He’s my brother.”
Her throat was closing and her breath was coming faster and faster. Her own fist collided with her forehead.
“He’s my brother.”
She sobbed the words out, her vision fading as she hit herself again. A high pitched keening noise pulled itself out of her, no more words were coming, just her raw expression of grief and longing and she hit herself again. She smacked her fist into her forehead and when she went to do it again, she felt a tiny hand wrap around her wrist.
“No Jazz! No hurting. No hurting.”
Danny’s little voice. Just like when he was first a child and would help her when she melted down. When her parents ignored her desire not to be touched, when they made her speak even when the words hurt like gargling acid, when the noise of the lab wouldn’t stop and pounded into her head like a jack hammer. He was always there for her, ever since he had understood what she was doing and why.
She didn’t try to pull her arm out of his hand but she hit herself again with her other hand. She could hear Danny begging her to stop, but she couldn’t, she couldn’t, she couldn’t. She went to hit herself again and a strong, calloused hand grabbed her wrist, then just as gently as if she were something precious and valuable held her other hand to keep her from hurting herself.
“Now, young one, there is no call for that.”
“Jazz it’s ok.” Danny whispered, because he knew the loud voices bothered her. Then he started humming, so softly she could barely feel it, yet his humming vibrated with ectoplasm and carried down all the way to her infant ghost core.
He was hugging her and holding her and humming to her and slowly, muscle by muscle her tension unwound. She could think again, she didn’t think she would be able to speak yet, but at the very least she could pull her wrists from the gentle hold of the other woman and wrap her arms around her little brother.
She held her brother, her Danny and sobbed and sobbed. She had gone through too much. She had been told she had lost her parents and that everyone she loved, including her beloved brother were dead, her home destroyed. Then she had driven half way across the country following a desperate thread to try and find him only to be beaten by the first stranger she encountered. But at the very least, she had her brother back in her arms again. Just like she was supposed to.
.
Diana watched the young woman cry, raw grief tearing its way through her. Jason had asked her to watch over the little King, and she would do so. She couldn’t hand the child over to the obviously distressed woman who had demanded him. She had defended herself, just like she would do during any of the spars with her sisters on Themyscira.
However, she had misjudged her opponent. This woman was not fighting with the relaxed energy of a friendly spar. She was desperately fighting, just as she had desperately begged for the boy. Lord Clockwork had not mentioned that the little King would have any siblings, but perhaps it merely showed that the Lord of Time still needed to learn the importance of mortal lives.
Even without the magic of the Lasso of Truth, Diana could see the love Danny had for his sister. She could see the way he knew exactly how to stop her from harming herself. How the young woman, the King had called her Jazz, didn’t risk harming the child when he held her wrist, instead using her other hand.
Now she could see the love, almost like a physical aura off the two young ones. She had found her charge, the young King she was to train, she had found him with an able caretaker, and she had found him in time to see the reunion between the King and his sister. Maybe she would have another to train and to teach, and the young King would have a valiant protector.
She turned at the sound of a grapple and Jason landed next to her, two teddy bears in his hand. One was dressed as an astronaut and the other was wearing a cloth version of Diana’s own armor. He was staring at the woman who was sobbing and holding Danny as if he were the most precious thing in the world.
“What the hell did I miss?”
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Hello hello! I finally caught up on DFF a few days ago and have been reading a bunch of meta ever since, but there are some things I can’t follow. Maybe you can help me?
First off, we keep talking about there being a Final Girl, but why is everyone so sure that there will be one? I could see more people surviving or the story going in a different direction entirely. Where does this conviction come from?
Then, I’m on board with the idea of hallucinations, but one thing that always bothers me is the question of how you could make sure that they all hallucinate the very same thing? I don’t know how hallucination-inducing drugs work, but that seems kind of weird to me.
Also, who is Tan and who is Perth again? This is such a dumb question, but I’m terrible with names and faces, and I know most of the characters now, but I keep mixing up these two.
Thank you so much for your time!
Anon, let me answer your last question first:
This is Mio who plays Tan in the series. Tan is part of the friend group but came along after Non disappeared.
This is Perth but it is unknown who he is playing in the series. He was only in the background of this scene in the dark jacket with the grey shirt.
As for the other questions, unfortunately, I cannot help you because unlike the rest of these perfectly normal people watching Dead Friend Forever, I'm crazy.
And because I'm crazy, I do NOT care about "reasoning" when it comes to my wack-a-doodle-doo theories. Therefore, White will be the Final Gay simply because I want him to be, and because none of these other motherf*ckers deserve to live.
Yeah, Fluke hasn't actively done anything, but he knew all of this was happening and turned a blind eye, so if Por is dead, why not just kill all of them? Well, expect for the actual killers, Tan and Phi, and the Final Gay White.
Por's death could have just been an accident, and everyone else will get out of this alive, but . . . I don't want it. I want Fluke to shoot Top, Tee to wrestle the gun away from Fluke only for it to go off and kill Fluke, White to kill Tee and run off scared, Tan to "die" because of an asthma attack (but he won't be dead), which will leave Jin and Phi as the only survivors, only for Jin to be stabbed by Phi right before White shows up with help.
Do you feel the crazy? Do you see what I was saying about myself? You cannot ask me logical questions because I am not using deductive skills. I'm operating off of vibes and vibes alone, which is why I felt Phi was sus in episode one. It's also why I don't like Jin. It's a vibe.
Which brings me to your drugs question - The vibes are off!
I think that Non is still alive and running around scaring them all, so not everything is because of the drugs, but if the energy isn't right, if the mood isn't chill, if the vibe isn't good, the drugs are going to hit different. The figurative trip will be bad. So if the literal trip involves the boys talking about Non and seeing videos of Non while they run through the woods for their lives, whatever drugs are in their system aren't going to be happy in a body with that amount of stress, and their brain will focus on Non and the masked killer. In fact, a common side effect of most party drugs is paranoia.
Hell, even some known prescriptions for depression and anxiety can cause these side effects.
Then again, I just do drugs. I don't know the actual science behind them, but I do know if the vibes ain't right, you're not gonna have a good night.
And these boys seem to be having a really shitty night.
But also, the boys haven't all seen the same thing. Fluke saw Por's eyes bleeding and attacking him. White saw a rash on his skin. Jin saw Mr. Keng. Top saw the masked killer trying to axe him (I think part of this was real) and thought he saw a masked killer in the road, so he scared Tee going on about it. Top also might be having a reaction to it which is why he was seizing.
PSA: Test your drugs, kids. Even Amazon, which I think is the devil, sells drug testing kits.
In case you have no idea what this image is about, the joint in her hand is laced with cocaine and was probably one of the reasons her ass was going through endless time loops, so don't do coke. Or things laced with it. Unless you wanna go into other dimensions and DIE every single time. Okay? M'kay!
So to wrap up my special brand of crazy:
White will be the Final Gay because like the Backstreet Boys, "I want it that way."
Everyone deserves to die because Phi is a cop's kid, and if the cops are good for anything, it's covering up the truth, so let this work in our favor for once.
Drugs be drugging, and sometimes people will think of the boy they tried to kill when under the influence, but it's a toss up. Who can predict what a person will see? So, like, don't betray people and you won't hallucinate being stalked by your own guilt *cough* Judas *cough*
Oh, and always test your drugs.
I hope this helped you, but it probably didn't. Either way, I'll see you in the tags in a few hours after Non finally loses his shit.
Slay, Non, slay!
#dead friend forever#dead friend forever the series#I wrote what I wrote#I have theories for days#but it's all based on vibes
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#trigunbookclub | Vol 1 | Ch 00-01
Click here for an archive of all my #trigunbookclub posts
Can I just say how much I love Nightow's silly cover redraws on the inside cover of each volume? Also, tickles me greatly how obsessed with action figures he was/is. iirc it comes up multiple times in his little artist's notes, and come on, look at the Stampede blu-ray covers:
ANYWAY, without further ado, #trigunbookclub commentary below the cut!
[Art & Story by Yasuhiro Nightow. Translation by Trigun Ultimate Overhaul.]
[Disclaimer: I have consumed much meta content & had many conversations about Trigun on Tumblr and Discord since earlier in 2023. Lots of my commentary will be a result of cooperative analysis, so thank you to all who share their thoughts!]
[Warning: While I will mostly avoid manga spoilers, some of my commentary will involve discussion of future topics. I am also assuming readers have seen the 98 anime and/or Trigun Stampede and are at least somewhat familiar with some of the major story beats.]
I've commented on this before, but the parallel between the titles of the manga opening and Stampede s1 ending makes me feral:
Also, what is going through this poor man's head right now? Gazing out at this destruction...trying to piece it all together
Onto chapter 1!
The absurd contradictions on Vash's wanted poster crack me up. It's all, ~VASH IS A BIG BAD KILLER!!!!~ then says "Note: staunch pacifist." I also like to imagine that Vash 100% posed for this photo--probably even knew it was being used for a wanted poster. Got booked for something silly, posed for the photo, then skedaddled out of jail all crazy-lizard-style.
Vash's first proper panel!!! He's so cute, LOOK AT HIM!!! *shoves Him in your face*
For those unfamiliar with the history of the manga: the original 'Trigun' ran for about 2 years in a shonen magazine that eventually ceased publication. It was picked back up as 'Trigun Maximum' in a seinen magazine later that year. Hence, the title change and the mood shift. I think Nightow agreed to the 98 anime adaptation either toward the end of Trigun publication or maybe even afterward, not knowing if the manga series would ever continue on.
As a result, Vash of the early manga and 98 anime Vash feel very much the same. Ah, yes, the 3 breeds of Vash: 1) Early manga/98 anime/BLR; 2) Trimax; 3) Stampede.
He's just oh so silly and cute. I luff him. 💖
He also has one hell of a broom head:
WHEN DID HE GRAB THE KID'S TOY GUN??!! He's so insane (affectionate) Just being the most absurd sassy bitch while low-key pulling off insane stunts
Did I mention he's an absurd sassy bitch
Oh oh oh -- wait, here's one of my FAVORITE panels in all of the manga (which also made it into the 98 anime!):
It is the perfect combination of his over-the-top drama, his habit of using absurdity and humor as a disarming and de-escalation technique, AND his honest-to-goodness true wish.
Sorry, can't help myself; gotta draw comparisons between manga, 98, & Stampede
INFLATION
Anyway...
Here he is. Our Vash.
Any version of Vash, at any time, abhors violence. He can't bear the thought of taking a life. He will do everything in his power, right down to brutal self-sacrifice, to avoid killing.
But I'm getting ahead of myself.
We have another very important introduction this chapter:
THE GIIIIRRRLLLSSSS~~~~~ *airhorns*
SLAAAAAYYYYY
GOD, Milly is massive (affectionate). And Meryl, especially by comparison, is tiny, but carries herself like a giant. She reminds me of a little toy dog who weighs less than 10 lbs but barks, growls, and postures like she's a 200 lb mastiff. (Except she absolutely has the guns to back it up. Pun intended.)
Also, Milly's enormous gun falling out of her jacket(??) absolutely sends me. I am really really hoping for this energy in Stampede.
Also, Meryl's face, oh my god:
You tell 'em, Milly.
Meanwhile...poor Vash....
(one last parallel)
#trigunbookclub#trigun#trimax#manga#trigun 98#trigun stampede#commentary#oh dear god i am so behind on the bookclub already
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WIP Wednesday
@joasakura and @vhenadahls were curious about the thermal clip meta, so here is a rough snippet from the relevant scene that combines heat sink lore with body autonomy struggles. :D
~
Garrus clears his throat. “So, Korlus.”
Shepard stares daggers at his tray, stabs at the potato heap, then jerks his hand back like it stung him. He inhales deep through his nose before focusing on Garrus. “Korlus. We reach orbit tomorrow afternoon. I want the two of you and our newest recruit down there with me. Taylor, how are things coming with unfucking the heat sinks on my guns?”
Taylor shifts uncomfortably in his seat. “About that. Ah, look, Commander, I know the detachable heat sink is new to you—”
Shepard’s expression darkens. “I saw plenty of it with the geth.”
“Yes, sir, but there’s a reason all the weapons manufacturers are following the geth’s lead with thermal clips. It’s a more efficient system.”
Shepard sets the fork down with the air of someone deliberately ejecting an ammo block. “I don’t recall the geth ever getting the better of me.”
“Well, they got the better of everyone on Eden Prime, didn’t they?”
Garrus and Joker exchange glances.
Uh oh.
Shepard glowers. Taylor mistakes it as an invitation to continue.
“Look, it’s simple force multiplication. I can change out a thermal clip and get back to firing in a fraction of the time it takes for an internal sink to vent. Can’t shrug off that kind of edge when ground skirmishes are won by whoever puts more bullets downfield.”
Garrus gives Shepard an uneasy look. He’s been hearing the debate over thermal clips for so long it hadn’t occurred to him Shepard missed all of it.
Within six months of the attack, C-Sec had struck a deal with Elkoss Combine to replace every weapon in their arsenal with detachable heatsink models over the next three years. A military as large as the Hierarchy would be lucky if they could cycle out the internal sinks within a decade, and Garrus imagines the Alliance is in a similar position. Too expensive, too much of a logistical nightmare. But smaller, well-funded private militias like Cerberus have already thrown billions of credits at it, and weapons manufacturers are making a killing. Half the weapons showing up on Omega are high-tech rifles whose only sin is an internal heat sink. Gianna Parisini is probably having the time of her life with the massive spike in corporate espionage from everyone clamoring to corner the market.
But Taylor’s right. Time spent waiting for a sink to vent is time for kinetic shields to recharge. Hell, Shepard had even said as much in one of their first debriefs after Therum, and Garrus had yet to see a gun Shepard couldn’t figure out and master on the fly. He might be the most adaptable person Garrus has ever met.
What’s going on here?
“Thank you for the lesson on small arms combat,” Shepard says, fist clenched so tight his knuckles are white. “But every fucking weapon on this ship has a proprietary sink, which creates a logistics nightmare on the ground. I’m not getting caught with a gun that won’t fire because I ran out of clips.”
Taylor makes a frustrated sound. “What are the odds of that? With dreadnoughts and orbital bombardments, infantry wars are a thing of the past. You know better than anyone ground insertions are about speed and precision. Everything we’re doing on this ship is get in, get out. When’s the last time you needed to recharge your suit battery or replace an ammo block in the field?”
“Torfan."
No one speaks. Joker stands a fork in his protein, covers it in the potatoes, and scoops some green-colored vegetable balls on top.
Eventually, Taylor sighs. “Yeah. Well.”
Shepard leans forward. “You wanted me exactly how I was, except you keep trying to fuck with who I was. So let’s refocus our efforts, shall we? Tomorrow I am dropping on Korlus with a gun that has an internal sink, and if you can’t make that happen I’ll find someone who can.”
#snippet#opus!verse#sam: fucking with my body is one thing but fucking with my gun is where i draw the line#am i foreshadowing some logistics problems during the reaper war?#MAYBE
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Day 20: Spa Day
“Specialty of clerics, druids and paladins, in Dungeons & Dragons,” Cas reads out loud, squinting at the paper laid flat against the kitchen table. He looks up at Dean, who shrugs.
“Metatron didn’t include DnD in your pop culture download?” Dean asks sympathetically.
Cas shakes head.
“Well, DnD is probably more counter culture if you want to get technical about it,” Sam says as he ferociously attacks the salad with a pair of tongs. Pieces of lettuce spray across the counter, and Sam sheepishly puts them back in the bowl, one by one.
“Nerd,” Dean coughs into his fist as he gives the pasta water a few hearty shakes of salt.
“Says the man who hung up his LARPing sword above his bed,” Sam retorts.
Dean points a wooden mixing spoon at him. “Gotta be ready for anything.”
"Seriously?"
"Did you forget I also sleep with a gun under my pillow?"
Cas shakes his head ruefully. "Your actions would make any gun safety advocate weep."
Dean grins. "Haven't shot myself yet."
Cas shoots him a flat look. "That's not nearly as reassuring as you think it is."
"You just don't know how to live, Cas." He turns back to the bubbling pasta pot.
"The word you’re looking for is MAGIC," Sam says helpfully.
"Thank you," Cas says as he writes down the correct answer. "Pastry dough used in crullers and beignets, five letters."
Sam shrugs.
Dean spins around, eyebrows raised at the pair of them. "Really?"
Both give him blank stares in return.
"I've made you watch the Great British Bake Off five times!" As Cas frowns, no doubt sorting through his millennia of memories for Pastry Week, Dean says, "It's a choux pastry, babe."
Cas dutifully copies it down. "Did you know in French, petit choux is an outdated term of endearment?" At Dean's perplexed face, he adds, "Petit means small."
Dean rubs his chin. "Little dough ball? I guess that's cute. If you're talking about a baby or something, like a real round one." He helpfully mimes the correct shape with his hands.
"I believe it refers to choux as in a cabbage," Cas says.
"Why the hell would you bring cabbage into it?” Dean makes a face. “Fucking frog eaters."
"Cabbage is a very versatile vegetable," Sam points out.
"You, shut up." Dean pours in three boxes of pasta into the boiling water. "Cabbage isn't versatile. It's gross."
Sam sets down his completed salad and takes a seat across from Cas at the kitchen table.
"It's a staple in a wide variety of cuisines," Cas disagrees.
"You're dead to me too."
Cas rolls his eyes and turns back to the crossword. Even though the answer comes to him in less than a second, he says aloud, "Quadrupedal combat vehicle in Star Wars films."
Dean perks up. "How many letters?"
"AT-ATs," Sam says as Dean glares.
"I was just about to say that!"
Sam ignores him. "There are some clues that pop up all the time," Sam tells Cas. "Like AT-ATs, arena, Erie, Argo, Eden."
"Words with a high percentage of vowels," Cas surmises.
"Yup." Sam cranes his neck, tilting his head to read Cas's puzzle upside down. "What's the theme?"
Cas points to the first long row of blank boxes. "Classic Wilson Pickett cover [1966].”
"Mustang Sally!" Dean sings into his wooden spoon, "now baby, guess you better slow your mustang down, oh yeah!"
Cas sits up straighter. "That song was in Miss Congeniality."
Dean groans as Sam's face turns half delighted, half incredulous. "You made him watch Miss Congeniality?"
Dean shakes his head. "It must've been part of Meta-"
Cas says at the same time, "You were hunting a siren with Eileen."
Sam doubles over laughing.
"What's the next clue, cabbage man?" Dean demands loudly.
Dutifully, Cas recites, "Top 10 funk hit from War with an iconic bass line [1975]."
Sam's brow creases. "Low Rider?"
Cas tilts his head, the description pinging his memory. "Like my car?"
Over the sound of pasta hitting the strainer, Dean chuckles. "Yeah, just like the pimpmobile."
Sam reads the next one, "Tracy Chapman hit with the line ‘I had a feeling I could be someone’ [1988]."
"Fast Car," Dean grunts as he throws the mostly water-free pasta back in the pot.
Cas dutifully jots down the answer before asking, "Janis Joplin’s final recording, which had an anticonsumerism message [1970]."
“Janis Joplin?” Dean repeats as he overturns the simmering alfredo sauce on top of the fettuccine.
Sam plucks a tomato out of the salad. “It’s Mercedes Benz,” he says, reaching over to count out the letters.
“The unifying clue for theme is Modern Music Staple that’s a punny description of 17– , 24–, 38 – and 48 – Across.”
“You got any letters?”
“A U _ O _ U N E”
“It’s Autotune,” Sam says, grinning. “Get it? Since all the answers are car songs?”
“Wordplay,” Cas sighs, wrinkling his nose.
“You’ll get better,” Sam says bracingly as he reaches over to pat Cast on the arm. “That’s why you’re doing the crosswords, right?”
“What’s left?” Dean asks.
“Close Chica.”
“Amiga,” Sam says confidently. “I haven’t forgotten all my middle school Spanish.”
Dean sets the steaming bowl of pasta on the table. “Whatever you say, hombre.” He takes the dish towel slung over his shoulder and throws it in the direction of the butcher block table. “Put that away, Cas. Let’s eat!”
“I’m almost done,” Cas protests as Dean ladles out servings for everyone. “Outings devoted to relaxation and self care, seven letters.”
“Spa days,” Sam says, grabbing Dean’s plate and placing a portion of salad on the side.
“I’m gonna need a spa day after this,” Dean grumbles, “to wash all the nerdgasm juice off me.”
“You watch Jeopardy! every night, you massive hypocrite,” Sam says without looking up from his pasta.
“Alec always gets a pass.”
Cas frowns. “Just like Swayze?”
“Just like Swayze,” Dean confirms before he dumps half his salad onto Cas’s plate.
#suptober22#fanfic#destiel fanfic#established relationship#canon divergence#canon au#sam winchester & castiel#fluff#domestic#rae writes fic
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and what if pete was shot instead of vegas??????? give us your meta on this,give us how vegas would react
hiiiii anon!!!!
aaaaah what a question!!!!!!!!
okay. i think had pete been shot, it would have most likely have been during the main showdown, early on in the ep, when vegas first stormed in, and one of his men shot pete by accident.
because there is no way vegas wouldn't have briefed his men. he would have instructed them quite clearly that whatever they do, they can not touch pete, otherwise the consequences will be dire.
and so i think the only way pete would get shot would be by pure accident.
and since it's pete, who has the entire main family care about him, plus vegas, present there, along with porsche too, the whole thing would very quickly become about pete's survival. especially because pete has Only Just returned.
i think vegas would just go into shock first, like he did in ep 11 when he found pete unconscious. and unlike pete, who just saw red first and shot down the guy who shot vegas, and then went into shock, vegas would be the opposite. he would go into shock first, realise whats happened, and then shoot the guy who shot pete.
and i think kinn would tell vegas to back off and not to come anywhere near pete. he'd probably beat the hell out of him and then point his gun at him, and vegas takes it all without retaliating, his eyes never leaving pete, until porsche comes in and tells kinn to back off, and pulls him away from vegas.
he'd then go to vegas and literally stand in front of pete so vegas can't see his face and tell him how he promised him that he'd let nothing happen to pete, so what happened to keeping his side of the deal? all whilst kinn and pol and everyone else just looks on in confusion.
but porsche can see how desperate vegas is to be near pete and hold him and talk to him, just like how desperate pete was in that bathtub in ep 13 when he was trying to protect vegas' name.
so porsche just, gives him one final look, and vegas is pleading at this point. and then he moves, and vegas goes crawling up to pete. and he's got his hand out midair, just above pete's face, not even sure if he has the right to touch pete. and his hand just lingers and ghosts above pete's skin. and he's so tentative and he keeps opening and closing his fingers until he can't hold it in any longer.
and he holds pete's face and does his Thing, where he cups pete's cheek and strokes his thumb across it. and he doesn't know if its him holding pete close to his chest or if he falls down on top of pete, but at some point he's just clutching onto pete out of desperation.
and he'll allow himself to cry in front of everyone, pride and ego be damned.
and all the while, none of this makes any sense to the people watching. but they dont try to stop it either. it feels too intimate. it feels as though if they were to break that moment, vegas will lose it. in which way? even vegas himself won't know. he could become a loose canon and kill everyone in sight from rage, or kill himself out of desperation and worthlessness or cry and cry and cry and scream like a child would out of agony.
and its only until the paramedics come and they break vegas and pete apart. and vegas doesnt ask, he demands that he is coming with pete in the ambulance to the hospital. to hell with this coup and to hell with the greed it festers. he's already a useless son anyway, and he's already gone against his dad once when he told him to kill pete and he didnt.
he will not lose pete in all of this. he said to him once that he wouldnt let him die so easily. and least of all, pete cant die like this. as someone pretending to be who he isn't. as someone dishonest to himself.
because none of these people, no one in fact, knows the most honest version pete, like vegas does.
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Starry Ocean | Leakira AU Explanation
Leonardo/ Lance (Appearance):
Hair: Brown-White hair (Longish, below shoulders to mid back)
Eyes: Ocean Blue eyes
Skin: Mocha brown smooth
Height: 5'5
Age: 17
Male
Family: Allura (Sister)
Boyfriend: Akira/ Keith
Friends: Pidge, Hunk, Shiro, Coran and Lotor.
- Bottom
Akira/ Keith (Appearance):
Hair: Dark black a little faded to gray
Eyes: Indigo purple
Skin: Pale
Height: 5'10
Age: 18
Male
Family: Shiro (Brother)
Boyfriend: Leonardo/ Lance
Friends: Pidge, Hunk, Lotor and Coran.
- Top
Leonardo and Akira are two Meta-Humans born with different powers and lived separate lives until one day that Leo decided to try and sneakily steal from Akira, a Meta-Human with able body powers of hot heat and a high body temperature didn't know that the boy was a little Thief until their worlds collided into one. Friendships and On the run does a lot of things including on making one hell of an adventure all the same.
Leo is a Thief and part time Clubber since he's ran away from home when he was younger leading to him being trafficked by Meta-Human snatchers that he just refers to them "The Snatchers" Usually his type of clothing is a light bluish crop-top, tight skinny jeans, a necklace from someone he never really mentions, gray eye shadow a little bit highlighting his Ocean blue eyes, and a furred jacket for when he goes clubbing. His usual attire is a green long jacket that reaches his waist, a turtle neck shirt that opens at his shoulders and elbows and connects to his middle finger, a hidden gun, tight jean pants (Dark), and white tennis shoes, and of course his necklace.
Keith is an Ex League of Shadows member so he's highly trained but after an incident he left the League of Shadows and is on the run from "The Snatchers" as he usually scowls upon the name when he runs into Lance, a Thief who tried to snag some cash from him one night at a club and ultimately a relationship formed between them.
Wattpad Username: @SeraphimFawn-fallen
#klance#leakira#vld x Justice League crossover#no space war#bottomLance#Top Keith#Allura and Lance are siblings#powers#Meta-Humans#Experimentation#Fan made story on Wattpad
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in top gun meta hell rn. what the fuck am i doing in top gun meta hell. i don't think i'm supposed to be thinking so hard about this movie. it's not designed for this.
#me debating the agency of Ice's character rn#“can Ice's character truly exist outside of maverick” technically yes.. but plot wise.. no.#me about ice:#“If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound?”#thinking about ice's “motives” like he's a fucking bond villain or something#my drafts are just full of half written ice essays about his “agency”#somewhere in my notebook it says “if mav left the navy ice would turn to ash”#my room is probably the messiest its been in two years and i'm sitting here trying to verbalize why Ice's career seemed so hinged on mav#TOP GUN META HELL!#top gun#iceman#tom iceman kazansky#maverick#stopthatfool goes crazy and explodes#seriously. im gonna explode.#sorry needed to get this out of my system
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youtube
Devil May Cry Missions 13-15
Mission 13 was a close call, I really thought I wasn’t gonna make it, just top 10 hardest levels in the series.
Yeah DMC1 has underwater segments. In first person, and you can only attack with that nail gun.
They’re...there, a bit awkward but nothing too offensive, I assume they’re a left over from when DMC1 was still a Resident Evil 4 prototype because they have nothing to do with the rest of this game gameplay wise.
We also fight Griffon for the last time, and I find the following cutscene interesting in a sort of meta sense.
It’s pretty obvious that this game was made by a totally different team than the following games, a team that had their own personal vision of the characters and lore that would go mostly altered in the sequels.
Can you really picture Dante as he is in DMC3 onwards going on a little speech about how his father was a man who was righteous and fought for the weak and how he’s gonna do the same? Or just him feeling pity for a dying demon just because his master is showing himself to be unneccesarily cruel?
Dante is a bit more serious in this game than he is in future games. He was made sillier in DMC3 to emphasize his younger nature given that it was a prequel but I guess since fans liked it so much they kept most of that wacky attitude for future games. Though unlike what I’ve seen other fans say I’d still say they characterize him as relatively more mature in DMC4-5, making him pull off wacky shenanigans while still recognizing when it’s time to be serious (especially in DMC5). Here Dante is....a bit boring honestly, since he doesn’t talk nearly as much and he kinda goes mostly on serious business mode from this point onwards, not necessarily without reason mind you as he’s about to face the killer of his family, but still given how this game itself introduced him as a bit of a jokester who can do stuff like keep a motorcycle in the air by shooting it a bunch of times while cracking jokes it just feels disappointing that the game kinda distances itself from that crazyness around the midway point
You will also notice that he puts the blame on Mundus for the death of his mother and Vergil. Apparently in the original vision of the lore Vergil was supposed to have died back when he and Dante were kids, only for this game to reveal that he had actually been kidnapped by Mundus’ demons and made into a brainwashed slave.
But then DMC3 rolled along and retconned that, so Dante’s line here makes little sense since, with the hindsight of DMC3, he should know that Vergil is most likely still alive albeit trapped in Hell.
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20 - ZZ Top - Eliminator (1983)
Ah, ZZ Top. The Houston blues-rock band known for spinning fuzzy guitars and big ass beards, except for the one guy who's last name was actually "Beard".
Having existed in America during the 80s and 90s (and having lived in Houston itself for a year and half) of course i know their hits (and i can see a few here) but I'm kinda excited to hear the deeper cuts.
Speaking of ZZ Top's deeper cuts: i got to see these guys live at Bonnaroo, but i don't think they quite got the point of Bonnaroo. Typically, if you're there, you're playing the hits. The Big Numbers. The ones you know everybody there is gonna be able to sing along to.
Over the course of 45 minutes, they didn't play a single song i could recognize.
I don't have an ounce of shame in saying that yeah, I left that set early and went to a different stage to watch The XX right as they started playing Intro.
Easily one of the better calls i made at that festival.
•Gimme All Your Lovin'-
Such a simple but effective drum beat. No frills but it doesn't need 'em.
Aggressively horny lyrics, but it feels almost campy with how straight they're delivered.
"If i blow my top, will you let it go to your head?" At the risk of sounding like John Waters for a moment, i think the world needs more barely-disguised lyrics about getting a blowjob, especially these days where it really seems like everybody's horny but nobody fucks.
"You got to pack it up, work it like a new boy should." Happy pride month, y'all.
•Got Me Under Pressure-
This girl sounds FUN AS HELL. I'm reminded of Sheryl Crow here: "are you strong enough to be my man?" (Yeah i know that's not what that song is about but play with me in the space here.)
•Sharp Dressed Man-
1000% the first song that comes to my mind when i hear "ZZ Top".
Also 1000 is likely the number of times I've heard this song in my 38ish years on this rock.
That riff still kicks all kinds of ass though.
Audience participation section: which movie's "main guy wearing a bunch of different suits for 5 seconds each" changing-room montage do YOU think of when you hear this?
(Correct answer: it's literally the background song for every. single. one. since this album came out.)
Also white gloves and looking for love...that's... certainly a look.
•I Need You Tonight-
I fucking love this song!
Oh wait, shit, no I'm thinking of INXS.
Jokes aside, i really like the echoing guitar tone.
Pretty solid bluesy "i miss my woman" song. If this album wasn't already stacked, I'd say this could have been a single.
And that solo, though!
•I Got The Six-
Before this one started, i was wondering what the six was referencing. A six pack of beer? I got your back? HAHAHAHA NOPE.
"I got the six, gimme your nine!"
Again, more songs about blowjobs! Sixty-nining, even!
And also, if you're attracted to women and you don't/won't eat pussy, know that i have lost some respect for you.
Horny as hell song, but it gets a nod of overall approval especially since the end is kinda hilarious.
•Legs-
ATTENTION META: 40 years ago, the bearded ones taught us all about the importance of having Legs and knowing how to use them. Y'all had no fuckin excuse for your floating torso mananangal-wannabe bullshit.
This song goes so fucking hard. At least 35% harder than a song about legs should go. I hate that it fades out during the solo, though. Let that man cook!
•Thug-
I know, I KNOW this album came out at least a decade before the show did, but that slap bass just feels Seinfeld-y. Funky, but Seinfeld-y.
Also, calendar check: June 21 is Thug Day, i guess. Remember to keep your machine guns and money secure, and bust your friends out of jail!
•TV Dinners-
Know what? I can appreciate that Billy and/or Dusty sings about processed microwaved slop with the same exact amount of gusto and dedication that he does about the most beautiful woman he's ever seen.
Otherwise it's basically a novelty song, imo. I can't believe it was a single.
•Dirty Dog-
Ah, the flip side of aggressively horny: the creepy/gross/misogynist angle. God forbid a woman does anything.
Also this really sounds like a ZZ Top b-side. It literally sounds like 4 of their other songs put in a blender for a while.
•If I Could Only Flag Her Down-
The misogyny continues and deepens.
In lieu of a review for this song, here's a lyric:
"I just want to crash her/
I just want to trash her."
And here's the vomiting emoji 20 times:
🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
•Bad Girl-
"Praise kinks DNI": the song. I feel like i need a shower after hearing this.
Well, the second half of the album sucks some real shit, but Legs is still a banger. It's pretty easy to see why the deep cuts stay deep, though.
And, like many, many albums I've heard before: after the first 5 or so songs, it's just time to put on a new album.
Favorite Track: Gimme All Your Lovin'. 100%.
Least Favorite Track: If I Could Only Flag Her Down. I'll spare you another 20 vomit emojis.
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I posted 951 times in 2022
That's 839 more posts than 2021!
70 posts created (7%)
881 posts reblogged (93%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@dianaprinceownsmyass
@istumpysk
@ladyshinga
@esther-dot
@nonbinary-bosmer
I tagged 184 of my posts in 2022
#the weirwood queen - 58 posts
#asoiaf - 57 posts
#asoiaf fic - 36 posts
#sansa stark - 27 posts
#asoiaf meta - 11 posts
#asoiaf art - 9 posts
#jon snow - 7 posts
#arya stark - 7 posts
#olyvar sand - 7 posts
#dracula daily - 6 posts
Longest Tag: 121 characters
#war crimes! against children! so many slaughtered villages?! henry kissinger is only alive because he’s too evil for hell
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Now for the Lannisters.
Fuck “pale flecks of gold”, Tywin gets green with hints of yellow. It is the green of dying grass, of bile, of envy.
Cersei and Jaime get a richer green; their vaunted beauty gets nothing from Tywin, but comes from Joanna.
Tyrion’s green eye has the same base yellow-green as Tywin, reflecting his place as Tywin’s true heir. His black eye was tricky, as I didn’t want the pupil and iris to blend together.
This batch of eyes really needs a second attempt when I have time, but I do like the overall colors.
See the full post
51 notes - Posted January 21, 2022
#4
Next up, the Martells. I need to do Doran and Ellaria later, as well as the sand snakes.
Elia has no canon eye color. I chose a rich brown, as bright as honey for her sweet disposition and as hard as amber for the strength hidden underneath. Hers are my favorite of all the eyes I drew.
Oberyn’s eyes are described as black “viper” eyes. I made them a very deep rich brown; solid and striking.
See the full post
54 notes - Posted January 21, 2022
#3
“It was the better part of an hour when the Count returned. "Aha!" he said; "still at your books? Good! But you must not work always. Come; I am informed that your supper is ready." He took my arm, and we went into the next room, where I found an excellent supper ready on the table.”
Hold up. I don’t remember if Dracula has any servants. Is he… cooking all Jonathan’s meals… himself?
I just. Dracula. In an apron? Spending an hour preparing an “excellent” supper?????
80 notes - Posted May 7, 2022
#2
My boyfriend and I are reading Dracula daily out loud to each other and discussing, and he has asked that I share these two theories because “tumblr loves that shit”
1) Theory the First
The three suitors, who are pals, deliberately agreed to all propose to Lucy on the same day, and whoever she accepted, wins
2) Theory the Second
Lucy’s three suitors track with the characters of Supernatural.
The neurotic mopey one who nearly sits on his hat, fiddles with a sharp object, and gets rejected: Sam
The cowboy gun nut whose response to rejection is to immediately try and get all of his buddies wasted: Dean
The one with no discernible personality (yet?) who apparently decided the best way to propose was to just fucking make out with a woman: Cas
104 notes - Posted May 25, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
ASoiaF Fic Writing Tools
Writing fanfic for A Song of Ice and Fire? Have I got some useful tools for you!
Fanmade timeline of book events; also includes distances and travel times
ASearchOfIceandFire allows you to search the full text of the books, by book and/or POV
Race For The Iron Throne has useful chapter recaps with historical analysis for AGOT through most of ASOS
Atlas of Ice and Fire has wonderful fanmade maps and population estimates
Happy writing!!! 💕
213 notes - Posted July 7, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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We're weird here, right? Yeah? Good. Let me tell you about the fucking MAGICAL narrative journey that is the CoD Zombies story. It's weird, it's jank as hell, and by the end it has me thinking seriously on the implicit meta-narrative to it. Also, the story ends like 4 separate times.
So we begin with CoD: World at War.
"Nazi Zombies", a minigame unlocked by beating the main story, where you get to feel more justified in sinking lead into a horde than possibly anywhere else in gaming, or life for that matter. Over the course of the original maps, the devs see positive fan response and put a little effort into it. We get perks, fancy technomagic laser guns and wonder-weapons, and even some characters and lore.
That lore, by the way, is "The nazis were experimenting on mysterious rocks that turned out to turn people into zombies. Then the zombies broke out. The end." Our heroes, meanwhile, are all simple as hell. A Japanese honor-obsessed samurai, a German mad scientist, a Russian whose only desire in life is vodka, and an ultra-macho rambo-esque American with an IQ only marginally higher than that of the zombies they'll be working together to slaughter. Basically, all stereotypes, but played for that over-the-top sort of comedy enough that I'll be generous and call them 'caricatures' instead. This group would eventually come to be called "Ultimis".
Call of Duty: Black Ops
Back by popular demand, is the Zombies mode, now no longer exclusive to the nazi brand of zombie, because the story's going international. This time, our heroes are going on a tour of WWII-era conspiracy theories. Ancient Vril mysticism, Shangri-La, nazi moon bases - basically the plot of Iron Sky 2. Simple, except not really, but definitely absurd in a fun, goofy way. Notably, the loading screens and advertising also framed these maps in a sort of "comic book"-y way, to help us understand the level of narrative consistency and complexity we'd be seeing here.
(Before continuing, by the way, we also have the absolute TREAT that is the map "Five". Seriously, go watch its opening cutscene, and then imagine those characters being your friendly voices for the duration of the game)
The critical thing here is that, while WaW had some "easter eggs", they were just cute little bits and bobs. "Interact with some rocks hidden around the map, play a song", stuff like that. But Black Ops easter eggs were something else entirely. Trying to explain these feels like explaining the conspiracy theories that inspired the maps. "Go stand on the floor panels to enter Eclipse mode. Then find the four wall-dials and set them to specific values. Now use the shrink ray on a specific rock, which you must then shoot around the map until it lands on the temple." Stuff like that. And even though nobody realized it until the end, they were all connected - if you do all the easter eggs leading up to it, then the Moon egg culminates in the mad scientist character taking over the zombie horde. And then you blow up the Earth.
That's right, they decide to just go flying beyond all chance of imagining this stuff was happening on the fringes of history, it was all-along the story of an apocalypse enacted by a mad scientist and his rival engineering events against him. The End. This was the BIG moment that grabbed the attention and imagination of me and others as a kid. It took Zombies from "neat" to "COOL", and, for better and worse, secured this storyline and style as the "zombies breadwinner" for several games to come.
Side note: I don't recall exactly when they did this, but at some point Treyarch's writers realized that it's maybe a bad look to have one of the playable characters be "'German scientist who helped create the Nazi Zombies", on account of, y'know, the fact that that makes him a nazi. So at some point they did that thing where they "soft-retcon" in some audio clarifying that actually while he was always a psychopath, he was only ever in it For The Science (tm) and it was actually his rival Dr. Maxis who signed his research team on with the reich.
I'm not sure if there's a term for this sort of the thing - when writers don't really retcon in the sense of overwriting previously established facts, but use "reveals" to try and overwrite the meaning of those previously established facts. Yes, technically that's what all good reveals do, but it's also obvious in times like these that there used to be a clear understanding of the lore on both the authors' and audience's parts, which the author has since decided they don't like and want to redo. "Oops, that previous evidence/event didn't count because of contrived circumstances you knew nothing about and could not possibly have guessed."
If I sound like I'm going off on a tangent, I want to be clear - firstly, this sort of practice always frustrates me, because it makes it clear that the author is readily willing to "cheat" in the game that is the communication of a narrative, and secondly because that's secretly what this whole mega-ramble is actually about.
Black Ops 2: We Care About The Lore Now
So, Treyarch wanted to do more Zombies, and they liked the vibe they had so far, so they decide to stay in the storyline that exploded earth. The characters - now a farm girl, a nerd, a hobo, and a schizophrenic guy, all American, all came off more annoying than the "comedic" take Treyarch wanted. This group would be dubbed "Victis", and not only were these characters poorly received, but the story itself would feel aimless. How do you one-up a grand master scheme and the apocalypse? What are our survivors even doing? Treyarch has our old mad scientist and his rival acting as voices in the Victis gang's collective head to try and vie for control of the zombies, and this story would ultimately culminate in one of them (based on player choices involving arcane steps punctuated by some oddly sexual ones) winning the power struggle, and either way, some type of "the world ends again", either with the mad scientist turning the world into his plaything, or (the canon ending) the rival scientist enacting some weird arcane collapse that will let him be with his daughter. Either way, we don't revisit this world again.
I specify world because the characters will return, and even in the same game, actually.
But first - in the middle of the Victis plotline we take a brief visit to Alcatraz for an unexpectedly great zombies experience that's entirely disconnected from either of the plotlines so far. I bring this up only for completeness sake, and for a point that'll hopefully become clearer later.
Anyway, we now return to our regularly scheduled zombie programming - by which I mean, a whole new experience, Origins, featuring "modernized", more tasteful renditions of our original Ultimis team. We're introduced now to a strong-but-disciplined American soldier, a now safely WWI-era not-quite-mad German Scientist, a world-weary Russian who uses alcohol to tastefully take the edge off, and a Japanese samurai warrior who's struggling with the decaying traditional idea of "honor" in a World-War 1 setting.
This "new" (yet chronologically older) variant of the team would be dubbed "Primis".
And this time the plot has them freeing the spirit of a young girl, Samantha, daughter of Science Rival Guy Dr. Maxis who we'd just seen end the world (twice) from some weird arcane trap on the battlefield "of the Great War" so she can go to a mysterious place called "Agartha". Also, the ending cutscene shows her and "Eddie" (who appears to be a child version of our playable german scientist) to be playing with dolls and action figures of the zombies and the playable characters - implying that in fact our whole storyline thus far was "just a game", and the shift of control over the zombie hordes in the first game to Edward Richtofen was in fact just "Eddie" taking his turn playing as the zombies.
It's easy to forget for those of us who've kept up with the story since this, but I cannot overstate how confusing this entire situation was to resolve from a lore perspective. Options were:
1: As implied in the cutscene, acktually "it was all just a game". The lore that players had worked hard to uncover was all, within its own canon, a game being played by children. This was wildly unpopular, but also quite possibly the authors' intended interpretation because in a very real sense, it all WAS a game, and the lore mostly WAS made-up by players out of scraps of lore they'd found.
2: Our four protagonists had acktually all met for the first time in WWI, then again incidentally wound up together again after un-developing as characters due to Magic Rock Exposure (tm) in WWII. Somehow the little girl freed in Origins and her dad whose brain got put in a drone during that process both get put back into their bodies, I guess.
3: It's all a parallel universe with its own separate continuity; the little girl and Eddie believe they're just playing games with toys when in reality they've been shipped off to copyright-safe-Heaven and "games with toys" is how they cope with the trauma of their zombie-filled lives.
BLACK OPS 3: MORE
So, Treyarch picks option 3. Makes sense, it keeps us gamers feeling like our investment was in something worthwhile and not arbitrarily patched together, while also allowing them some more narrative liberty. Easy, right?
WRONG
Rather than just roll with "We're doing zombies again in a newer, cleaner universe", they have to tie everything up ALL together. Our new plotline is that ACTHSDHALY the zombie-rocks came from a bunch of eldritch tentacle-creatures called Apothicons from super-hell. We meet Dr. Monty, who's basically like if Willy Wonka was actually secretly God who's trying to get the kids safe and sound up in heaven and the now eldritch-based zombies sealed back away.
We follow Team Primis as they go back into our first universe to harvest the souls of Team Ultimis (so, their own original souls) which will somehow allow them to go to I-can't-believe-it's-not-Heaven too. They go there, shit accidentally goes wrong when eldritch-satan breaks out, but the gang beats him up with guns and Monty is able to re-establish his perfect world.
Except, uh, he tried to delete the Primis crew while he was it it, but don't worry, that random moment in Alcatraz earlier was act[coughing fit]ally super-duper important and drinking the blood of those prisoners let out heroes survive! BUT ACTASKFHALY THIS WAS MONTY'S PLAN ALL ALONG and he teleports them back in time to fight in-
oh right so "the great war" from origins wasn't in reference to WWI, it was
actually
the site of The Great War between humanity and the apothicons, and Monty time-travels the crew back then to be the heroes of legend that set up Origins to happen, creating a time loop. Characters are, this whole time, saying "the paradox must be resolved" without ever explaining what it is.
But yeah anyway the whole ride this game leads to a big "it was all a time loop" cycle deal, and also the tone has slowly shifted from BO1 comic-style to something that feels more like an "Avengers"-style quiptacular with MORE budget, MORE stakes, MORE lore that actually isn't a good thing because the more lore they pile on the more twisted and absurd the story has to get and also it occurs to me that "going avengers" actually is kinda the natural conclusion to "being like comic books".
BLACK OPS 4: BUT WAIT THERE'S FOUR
So at this point, Treyarch and Activision in general are spending more focus on trying to figure out a new angle to Zombies, but nothing takes off. Infinity Ward's "Zombies in Spaceland" was a whiff, Cod:WW2's "reboot" of Nazi Zombies didn't stick, and their new "Chaos" storyline featuring mixed-religious lore was also met with lukewarm-to-poor response (sidenote here: now that we're in a proper era where it's common practice to ask "What if Ra punched Odin in the face while Ares watches" we really should establish a term for it, like "Mixed-Religious Combat" following the form of "Mixed Martial Arts).
SO They felt some pressure to go back once more to the cash cow what is their absolute mess of an "original" zombies story, now termed the "Aether" arc. They don't have many maps left to develop this but that doesn't stop them from opening the story again, and this time the writers have fucking HAD IT with this story so they decide it's time to fucking END it.
Here's your finale: Victis crew (the all-american team nobody liked) are back, slightly better written this time, on the map that had gone the longest without a remake (notably, in keeping with modern media practice, every zombies map from from the Ultimis-Primis plotline had been remade at least once by now), and they make a macguffin.
Then Primis Nikolai (the russian guy) uses it to wish a new, zombie-free universe into existence and sends the kids away into it.
Also he poisons and kills all of Ultimis and Primis. Then has the kids shoot him. THE ADULTS ARE ALL DEAD NOW AND THEY GOT BANISHED TO SUPERHELL WITH THEIR MULTIVERSE THE END. Nikolai gives us some lore mumbo jumbo about how the arcano-babble and the eldritch-babble had done some techno-babble that "bound the team's destiny forever to the apothicon menace", so that the only way a universe could ever be free of zombies would be for him and his friends to all die.
And the thing is, he's right. Because if you've followed this far, you're probably seeing a pattern: People like these characters, even in their worst-written moments, and Activision isn't going to just let that go unmilked. As long as there is any possible way for these characters to return, they'll be brought back and the lore is going to be held and gunpoint and forced to cook up a reason for them to be there shooting zombies. So the only possible way to let this tortured, tangled mess of a plot finally reach an actual ending is to kill its protagonists - and not just kill them, but write them off so conclusively that there's no chance of resurrection, no more alternate universes containing them, NOTHING. THEY ARE GONE. And true to the Homestuck-ass law that was inspired by this exact effect, the only way death can stick from a narrative sense is if everyone's death is either a Just end or a Heroic sacrifice to nobly ensure a better life For the Kids.
Samantha and Eddie (at this point nobody asks why Eddie even exists or what timeline these kids are from) are finally safe. The end.
COD COLD WAR THE STORY KEEPS GOING
As if to prove my point, Cold War Zombies picks up with a new set of protagonists... and an easter egg featuring the return of Samantha, now slightly more grown up, I guess, and also with superpowers? And then she flies around a bit, before finally heroically sacrificing herself out of the story for good. Eddie - now a full adult Edward Richtofen once more - is a "big reveal" in a cutscene afterwards, confirming that, in fact, there will be no peace fucking ever until every last character from this beautiful, twisted plot is gone.
EPILOGUE
And I want to be clear, it is beautiful. I wouldn't have followed it this far or spent two hours learning just how much I have to type about it if I didn't love every second of it, especially the seconds spent hating on it. I could, and probably eventually will write another essay at some point on how fucking much I love jank-ass "broken" things like this.
But for now, I hope y'all see my points here. It's this weird case you see happen every now and then where people just fall in love with their characters, and won't ever let go. Certainly doesn't help that the authors of those characters can't figure out how to write anyone else decently, but this is just one of many franchises I've seen where the unwillingness to let go of a fan-favorite leaves the plot tied in knots as it constantly has to try and present a NEW BIGGEST THREAT EVER that becomes a BIG DRAMATIC CONCLUSIVE FINALE that then needs even bigger contrivances to bring the favorites back.
It's done a fucking number on Halo's story, which is impressive because a lot of halo's core fans never even really consider that it has one. It's hard for me to talk about Halo here without thinking to myself "STOP TALKING ABOUT JOHN"
Same deal with Marvel, same with Homestuck, same deal in a lot of cases that I'm sure you're aware of too.
So as my closing thought and my reward to you for reading this far, here's some homework! What the fuck do you call these problems? What do you call it when lore starts to go sour because it's spent too long being about the same thing? What do you call it when fan demand forces writers to rethink their endings repeatedly? What do you call it when writers "cheat" their way around prior writing, re-contextualizing everything so much that it's hard to actually believe anything they say anymore and we're just left to sigh and feel odd relief when they say "Somehow Palpatine has returned" without further explanation because at least that means ONLY the ending of the original trilogy has its weight retroactively worsened?
#zombies#cod#call of duty#narrative analysis#overanalysis#idk#rule#i guess#ramble#rambles#E#this became about#media#like media in general I guess#thank you for reading
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The Flash has taken it upon himself to borrow Captain Cold's gun whenever he has a new meta problem, Len is less then impressed with this so called hero and his sticky fingers.
"Cold." Len barked into the phone, catching it on the fifth ring after being rudely awakened from his sleep.
"Where are you?"
"Barry?" Len pulled the phone away from his face to see it was almost three in the morning. "Why the hell are you calling me? How did you get this number?"
"Leonard, where are you?" Barry huffed impatiently, an explosion echoing through the speaker.
Len was glad his decision to change up safehouses in the city for his cabin in the mountains was paying off.
On top of wanting to keep Barry's paws off his gun he was in some hot water with the Irish after he took over eight blocks of their territory with the help of his Rogues.
He wasn't a fan of hiding out while his people were fighting in his name but he had taken a bullet in the shoulder and knew he needed to be back to fighting form before he executed the last part of his take over.
"Scarlet, I'll give up my location to my archenemy when Hell freezes over. No sooner."
"I don't have time for this, Snart, just tell me where you are."
"Goodbye Barry." Len responded in a petulant voice before he hung up the phone and threw it back down onto his nightstand. Since he was awake he took two more pain killers and used the bathroom, slipping back into bed and closing his eyes as soon as his heavy head hit the pillow.
Two minutes and thirty three seconds went by before the unmistakable smell of ozone and a light breeze whipped through the silent room with a flash of lightning.
The cold gun that had previously been stored on his nightstand for easy access was now in the hands of the Flash who stood in full costume at the end of Len's bed with an apologetic smile on his stupidly pretty face.
This was not how he had pictured Barry Allen's first time being in his bedroom.
"I promise I'll bring it right back."
"Scarlet don't you dare-" Len hissed threateningly, already throwing the blankets off himself to stand only to receive another tight smile before the light breeze and smell of ozone washed over him and he was alone once again.
This so called fucking hero just stole his gun. Again.
#coldflash#captain cold#the flash#leonard snart#barry allen#new fic#almost complete#moodboard#my first ever#so dont judge too hard
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