#this is literally the best thing I could manage
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Could I ask for X-Men '97 Gambit with a reader who likes to steal stuff for him to wear? Like watches, gloves, etc?
Pairing: Remy LeBeau x male!reader
Warnings: light swearing??
Summary: A few small glimpses into your life with your boyfriend and your affinity to give him gifts
A/N: Look it's after midnight which basically means I'm too emotional for my own good but I forced myself to write this because I adore the person who requested this even if I barely interact with them. I have a very stong protective sense over them. So if you see this: love you, bro <3 (I also went a bit overkill with the prompt. oops)
REQUESTS ARE OPEN
MASTERLIST
Since the two of you met, people have told you that you and Gambit were practically made for each other
And that's definitely not only because your first meeting literally consisted of you pickpocketing each other. As two people do when they're in love.
After joining the X-Men Remy has slowed down with the thiefing a little
Which basically meant that you had to steal enough for both of you. Which was good for him because he got lots of presents out of it but like…bad for everyone else
Remy had been alone in his room when you threw open the door, and immediately slammed it shut behind yourself, holding up a pair of gloves.
"Got you something!"
The next second he could already hear Logan's angry shouting
"...and where have you got them from, cher?"
"...store?"
"Uh huh."
"Glove store"
"Of course"
He just grins, walking towards you and giving you a peck on the cheek before taking your hand.
"Now come on. Let's go before Wolverine finds us."
It wasn't unusual that Storm or Scott took you to the side and tried to have the "Stealing is bad" talk with you
But obviously you aren't stupid. You know it's not exactly right. But looking at Remy's eyes lighting up whenever you gift him something? That's worth it.
They do get used to it at some point
But you never get used to the way that he smiles at you like you just laid down the world at his feet.
You two just walked back to the jet after a quick mission, sneaking your hand into the pocket of his coat, dropping a watch inside.
"Shh." you wink at him, making sure the others haven't seen.
He feels the object in his pocket and just grins, pulling you a bit closer and putting an arm around your waist with a smirk.
"You spoil me too much" he whispers
"There's never too much with you"
Now you were priding yourself on always being rather relaxed
Your hands always were steady and you never were nervous when sneaking your hand into a stranger's pocket
So who knew that the absolute scariest thing you'd ever give Remy was the one thing that you hadn't stolen for him
"Okay what's going on?" Remy looks at you, after you had asked him for a walk around the compound but then spent the time unusually silent.
For a moment you just look at him and then put your hand into your own pocket to grab the object inside. "I wanted to give something to you."
"Oh?" he smirks. "You're usually not that nervous when gifting me anything."
You take a deep breath and then pull out the small velvet box while sinking onto your knee simultaneously.
His eyes widen in shock. God, in any other situation you would relish in the realization that you had managed to surprise him.
"Remy LeBeau. You are…probably the best thing that ever happened to me." you fiddle around with the box in your hand. "And…god i've never been happier than just whenever i'm with you. And I know that this isn't…" you sigh and open the box, showing off the ring inside. "I know we can't officially do this. Not yet at least. But I want to…look at you and call you my husband."
He just stares at you.
"...This is the part where you say either yes or no but my knee is kinda getting sore."
He seems to awake from his trance, just nodding slowly. "...yes. Yes of course you bastard!" with a sudden burst of energy he throws himself into you for a hug, landing both of you on the ground.
You try to stay cool, probably failing miserably as you grab his hand, putting the ring on his finger.
"I love you" you whisper
He leans his forehead against yours. "Not as much as I love you, cher."
#male x male#x male reader#male reader insert#xmen x male reader#gambit x male reader#Remy LeBeau x male reader#remy etienne lebeau#remy lebeau#Remy Lebeau x male reader#xmen the animated series#xmen comics#gambit xmen#xmen 97#remy lebeau x male reader#x-men x male reader
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Hi there!! Is there anyway where we could get a Ragatha x reader. Where the reader comforts Ragatha who starts to feel somewhat unappreciated by some of the other members of the circus. Maybe the reader could give Ragatha a small present they working on just for her to show her she does have someone who cares and appreciates her. Please I just want her to feel some form of love and appreciation. She is legit such a sweat heart and I wanna tell her how amazing she is.😭😭😭
Giving thanks
Ragatha x Gn!reader
Hi! This seems like such a great idea, I literally stayed up until 1AM to finish it. I agree Ragatha is such a sweetie she deserves the best, also in this fic she has a small mental breakdown but it’s all okay because the reader is a sweetheart. Enjoy!
A simple thank you would have been enough, that's all she wanted. She wanted the others to finally notice all the mental and physical help she gave. The comfort she provided to Pomni when she first arrived, whenever Gaggle's mask broke because Jax made the trip. Ragatha always made sure to help. When Zooble or Kinger were having a rough day she’d take time out of her day just to make them feel better. She never minded doing it, until now at least.
Ragathas posture was slumped with tiredness and her shoulders were stiff showing her stress. She sat in her room contemplating, she felt so out of it. All she wanted was for someone to notice the effort she offered every day.
You could tell Ragatha was distressed, at first you thought she just felt like being quiet, you had days like that yourself but today felt different she seemed somewhat depressed. Her pretty smile gone and her chipper attitude deflated. It made you sad to see her that way, you hoped a small gift would lift her spirits, a red paper flower, it was a similar red to her hair and just thinking about it made a small smile grow on your face. But first, you wanted to make sure she was okay, she was the backbone of this circus and God knows without her we would all be lost.
You made your way to her room hesitantly flower in hand and approached her room quietly, you softly knocked on the door, not to startle her. "Hey, Ragatha," you said softly, your voice holding concern.
You heard a muffled shuffle in the room, then her door slightly opened, only being able to see part of her face, "Oh, uh hello," she murmured awkwardly, forcing a weary smile.
"I noticed you've been off lately," You said, gently “Are you alright?” You asked, it felt like such a silly question, clearly, she wasn’t alright she’d been avoiding everyone all day.
“I-um well-“ Ragatha stumbled over her words, nobody had asked her that in a while, that thought alone hit her like a title wave of emotions. She started to break down, and through broken sobs, she barely choked out, “I just, I’ve been doing so much and no one has shown an ounce of gratitude!" “I’ve done so much and it feels like it’s for nothing, no matter what I do it’ll never be noticed…” You looked at her with wide eyes, is this really how she felt this whole time? How could you not notice? “Ragatha..” you use your hand to push up her chin so she can look you in the eyes. “I hear you. It's completely understandable that you're feeling this way. Trust me when I say your kindness and support haven't gone unnoticed, even if it may have seemed that way. We all rely on you more than you might realize, and your efforts haven't gone unappreciated. You're not alone in this, and I'm here to support you, just like you've supported everyone else.", “Here, I have a gift for you.” You said bashfully, “I know it’s not the prettiest thing in the world but I was hoping it was enough to make you feel a bit better.”
With trembling fingers, Ragatha carefully took the paper flower. Tears welled up in her eyes as she realized the effort that went into it. Finally, even if it was as small as this it was still so perfect.
"It's... it's beautiful," she managed to choke out, her voice thick with emotion.
You smiled warmly. "I wanted to express my gratitude for everything you do," "You're always there for others, offering comfort and support. Your kindness hasn't gone unnoticed, Ragatha."
Ragatha's heart swelled with warmth as she looked at the gift in her hands. At that moment, she felt a wave of adoration wash over her, lifting the weight of loneliness from her shoulders.
"Thank you," she whispered, her voice trembling with emotion. "Thank you for seeing me, for hearing me, for understanding."
As Ragatha looked at the thoughtful gift before her, "It’s so lovely," she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. “Something you both got in common" you replied, God that was embarrassingly sappy, Ragatha let out a sweet laugh, leaning in closer, your eyes locked on hers. "Seriously though please know that I care about you, Ragatha. More than you'll ever know."
Ragatha's breath caught in her throat as she felt the warmth of your hand on hers, her heart racing with nervousness. "I... I care about you too," she finally admitted, a shy smile spreading across her face.
She finally had someone who cared, someone who appreciated her for the kind-hearted soul she was.
And in that simple gesture of kindness, Ragatha found the love and appreciation she had been yearning for all along.
#the amazing digital circus#the amazing digital circus ragatha#ragatha x reader#tadc ragatha x reader#ragatha x reader tadc#ragatha x reader the amazing digital circus#the amazing digital circus x reader#the amazing digital circus fanfiction#tadc x reader#tadc
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Something I haven't seen enough discussion around is Eddie's catholic guilt in relation to 'the nuclear family'. So many people have pointed out the potential for gay repression due to his catholic upbringing- but what about his obsession with finding a mum replacement for Shannon??
So Ana is his first choice after Shannon dies and Eddie explicitly admits that he chose her because Chris liked her as a mother figure. Marisol he did pick based on her being pretty, but then he ends up literally staring off into the distance and remembering sex with Shannon- so it's clear that there really isn't anything other than 'prettyness' that's making Eddie stay with her. Then he sees a woman that looks like Shannon, and instantly gets unhealthily attached to her, in the hopes that he can re-create what he had with his dead wife.
I'd make a guess that Eddie has a LOT of guilt about the relationship he had with Shannon. I'd guess that since they got pregnant really young, out of wedlock, and proceeded to get married in order to 'rectify the mistake of daring to have a child in this way' (becuase you KNOW the church and their community pressured them to Wed, it's literally something Eddie says). But I think Eddie probably doesn't want to think about the problems that come with them being together so young. They fought, they bailed on each other, they didn't communicate well- but those behaviours are the RESULT of other issues. Issues like 'we literally were not fully realized people when Shannon got pregnant', 'we didn't really know who we were' 'we didn't know what we wanted in life'.
Everything about Eddie says that Christopher is the best thing in his life, and I 100% think that's true. I think Eddie loves Chris more than anything. But because of that, I feel like Eddie doesn't want to attach ANYTHING negative to Chris. And it's like, Eddie, you're allowed to acknowledge that Chris -who you love dearly- was the result of a rocky relationship. Chris is allowed to be an unintentional pregnancy. It's okay if Chris wasn't planned, that doesn't make Chris bad, and it doesn't make either Eddie or Shannon bad.
But I think Eddie is a guy who really REALLY wants to be in control. He wears a mask around most of the time pretending to be in control of his life and emotions. Consider in the lawsuit arc, when Eddie yells at Buck in the grocery he says "We all have our own problems, but you don't see us whining about it. Somehow we just manage to suck it up." Like ??? Eddie I'm so sorry, you are the mayor of repression. Like he acts as if he can control things because the reality that he can't control things is literally terrifying to him.
But it's also something religion can kind of influence you to think!!! There's a strong theme in Catholic circles that 'what you think leads to what you do'. The idea being 'sinful thoughts leading to sinful behaviour'. And if you look at Eddie's character in regards to that..... Yeah, things kinda look screwed up for him. Because he's been through a lot; being a kid with absent father, looking after his sisters, having a disabled child at a young age, living in warzones, a rocky relationship with his wife, working 3 jobs while being a single dad, being shot by a sniper - this dude is TRUAMATIZED. And he probably has TONS of really bad thoughts all the time, 'what if I died right now, what if I kill people right now, what if this person I'm trying to save dies, if I grab the gun from this nutcase I could kill him and that would save everyone a lot of hassle' type thoughts.
And the fact that he represses all of this, and refuses to bring it up, and insists that he can just move on from all his trauma no problem- it all culminates in this arc he's going through with cheating and hurting the people around him.
Which is funny- because it seems that Eddie is constantly striving to achieve the perfect family, to get back to the idea of the nuclear family with a mum, dad, and kid.... But all he's ended up doing is hurting everyone around him. Hurting Marisol by cheating, hurting Chris by forcing mother figures into his life instead of it happening naturally, and hurting himself by refusing to actually fix the root cause of problems.
By trying so hard to obtain a 'perfect family' he's destroying the family he already has. Because in Eddie's own words "The 118 is the family we chose." And he's messing that up.
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Happy Love Day! ❤️💋
#Sims 4#TS4#The Sims 4#Sims 4 Screenies#Sims 4 Screenshots#Happy love day from these two lovebirds#I spent way too long trying to get pics of them here and in blender#this is literally the best thing I could manage#It sucks#This is why I don't do this anymore#nothing ever comes out how I want#enjoy the suck!
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Aaaaand i decided to post more of my f1 crafts here so here landoscar edition (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧
Onse again photo without doodles under cut and some rambling in tags
#starting with oscar charm#actually those charms r first f1 thing i ever did so they aren't as detailed as others#but there few things i rlly like about them#like how i managed shapes with 81#and colours with OP#also added literally my favourite bead ever that i have only one of(orange star)#also i think that necklace i took apart for those metal stars that reference alpinestars is find of the century#and those beads that represent his helmet actually look better in person#like the blue one have actually light blue accent that plays out in the sun#and ofc seashell#bc i made this first i matched Logan's one to that#but if i did them together i would also add blue star to oscar#and very random but i drilled that koalas head bc it wasn't a charm#with lando is way less details#i really like bead for his eyes and doodle for it#and helmet beads#but my favourite is gear#bc i took apart mechanical clock for it with my dad#and also how i used 7 bc the only L in store was red#i don't have a lot to say about braclets honestly#they r mostly vibes#but I'm proud of gradient from orange to black to yellow to black to orange#bc yellow doesn't rlly work for me#but i incorporated it to best of my abilities#also doodle on oscar bracelet with stars from Australian flag???#i felt so smart icl#damn i used all tags i could so I'll just say that I'm in love with crafting once again and thank you for reading all this rambling#oscar piastri#lando norris#landoscar
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I’m like Johnny Truant in the tags of every goddamn post I make or reblog on this site and I’m not apologizing. If you want me to apologize come over to my house and you can talk to the minotaur about it
#House of leaves#im literally going insane these days I should go back to journaling but I’m also afraid of how far off the deep end I’ll go#Literally I am losing it and I’m being serious#I’m so fucking tired of being lonely and being left out and not being able to make connections#Sometimes I feel as if im doing things without realizing and no one is telling me about it#Other times it feels like I must have something incredibly wrong with my face or body and no one will say anything#People make plans and don’t bother to ask me if I want to join and then when I find out there’s a group chat that all my friends are in#Except me and when I asked if I could join I was given a bunch of reasons that were frankly bullshit why I couldn’t join#Are they talking shit about me? I know everybody there it’s not like I am a stranger#Am I just a stranger in this world as I unllikeable? I try my best to be nice and charitable but what am I missing?#Do I black out and say things and do things? Am I more mentally ill than I know?#The only reason (or one of the very few) why I stay alive is because of my horses because I know they would miss me and I already feel bad#Not seeing them everyday#I’m tired of being the odd one out I’m tired of being entertaining when necessary#I don’t want my only friends to be horses because it further alienates me from the rest of society and I just want to be accepted I’m not#Looking to fit in I just want connection and friendship and I can barely seem to manage that#Maybe I’m just not worth it.
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if they paid a living wage, interpretive jobs really would be one of the few kinds of non-evil work in existence… you literally just get to be in a space… and share it with people… crazy…
#it’s sooooooooo good#and thankfully i’m not currently in a position where i need to be making a ton#so i get to keep being a naturalist for a while! yay!#if i could i would literally just travel the country doing interp jobs my entire life#i can’t imagine anything better#there are so many amazing places and things out there#but right now i’m just excited about the job i’m going to apply to in a couple months for this fall…#i don’t want to delude myself into thinking i have it in the bag#but i’m going to have a VERY strong application - that’s for sure#so i’m very !!!!!!!!!! about it at the moment#planning my cover letter and scoping out references…#(the application likely won’t open until May btw lmaoooooo)#(i just get overly excited)#(but i’m having fun)#the fact that (if i get it) i’ll get to do that and ALSO keep my current job is the fucking BEST#i love my manager
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if any other bitch in konoha had been gay apart from sasuke none of this would have happened to my son naruto.
#pussy from the turbotron edgelord 3000 and his whole life went up in flame. NOT worth it#no but fr it's insane how he bamboozled every fan into thinking he was so interesting and cool and badass when .#at the point im at in shippuden hes by far the least interesting of the main characters. one track mind (vengeance) and no depth beyond that#like the other characters rn : sakura coming in to her own ; finding her path and her strength + sharing a connection so deep with naruto#over their common loss that they both just Know although they absolutely cant talk about it#yamato: the only survivor of orochimaru's monstrous experiments on children; kakashi's stand in thats so different from kakashi#it makes you wonder what it would have been like with him as their teacher from the start;#a mystery thats clearly trying his best but whose mission truly is A Lot#SAI: A BRAINWASHED SPY A PAWN FOR A SECRET ORGANISATION WHO CLINGS TO HIS HUMANITY NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES HES BEEN PUNISHED FOR IT#WHO FELL IN LOVE WITH NARUTO FOR MAKING HIM REALIZE HOW DEEP THINGS COULD BE FELT AND HOW DEEP RELATIONSHIPS COULD RUN#WHO HAS BEEN DRAWING A BOOK FOR HIS DEAD BROTHER FOR YEARS EVEN IF HE'S FORGOTTEN WHAT HIS BROTHER LOOKS LIKE#WHO DECIDED TO SPARE SASUKE BECAUSE HE'S LOVED. WHO JUST WANTS TO LEARN HOW TO LIVE A HUMAN LIFE.#MOST AUTISTIC CODED CHARACTER OF ALL TIMES HAS NEVER SUCCESSFULLY MASKED A DAY IN HIS LIFE.#sasuke: sasuke#anyway. im not touching on naruto because i could be here for days#BUT while sasuke on his own so far is very whatever. the narusasu dynamic is truly one for the ages#bc i just saw the ep where sasuke manages to see kyuubi inside naruto and wooshes him away and it's very like.#oh so hes literally seeing naruto's demons and banishing them even as hes telling naruto they dont matter to each other anymore.#oh ok cool cool cool cool this feels normal and not something to obsess over#jesus christ why am i typing all this. who here cares#naruto thoughts
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people smarter than me have said this before but jesus christ why does every job seem to require at least a year of experience and a degree in some hyperspecific field. where did the entry level positions go? how am i even supposed to get experience if none of yall will give me a job without it?
#theres already almost nothing related to my field being offered but even the unrelated things that i think i could try are out bc of this#most of the stuff id actually care abt doing actually require 3-5+yrs! in a field that i cant get into without experience i cant get!#and people talk abt how 'nobody wants to work' i am BEGGING you for a job. literally begging (cover letters).#im coming to the horrifying realization that its possible Nothing i have done w my entire life matters. i have nothing useful#i really feel like i made a mistake. that cant be the best five years of my life i wasnt even happy during most of them#i applied to six jobs weeks ago and ive heard back from one of them and it was a rejection. and theres nothing else to apply to#my degree isnt helping and all of my hobbies are useless. why am i only good at/passionate abt arts. why not math or smth instead#i should have just done ece like i was planning to instead of my honours. what was even the point#and im watching other people in my year get great jobs right out of university. watching my BROTHER get offered work on a silver platter#hes 19 and got five different offers + didnt apply people just asked him to work for them. second year in a row this has happened#hes never had to work for minimum wage. hes always had a good job in his field lined up anytime he wants to work and it always pays well#and i finished five years and ive had to beg for everything ive ever gotten and its still not enough to count for anything#im proud of him but fuck it stings a little#levi.txt#vent tw#oh right i forgot i should just walk in and shake the managers hand. /right/. and they will simply give me a job on the spot bc of this#if people whove been working the same job since before 1990 dont fucking stop giving me bad advice istfg#and these same people say nepotism isnt real and in the same breath talk abt giving their nephew a summer job at their company#literally all i want is work i can be decent at that i care abt and making a living wage. it doesnt have to be fun i dont want to be rich#i just want to do an ok job feel like my work matters and make enough to start my life. thats all
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Misc daily life images
#image commentary in tags once again since they don't allow captions anymore and I feel weird using the alt text for that --#1. COLUMBINEEEE... (I think..???) one of my favorite flowers... I managed to grow a small one in a pot last year. huzzah#2. spicy soup for lunch (another very rare lunch since I usually eat literally the same exact thing every day for my stomach#issues and stuff lol).. also made a fruit smoothie but put tapioca boba in it out of curiosity.. which was weird#3. woven cucumber shavings.. one of the many little meticulous tasks that I find oddly fun and could probably do for hours#4. A RED FOUR LEAF CLOVER!!!! There are some patches of clover in the yard that have weird red coloring and red spots on them#almost like it's some sort of damage or something but it seems natural (and I wonder if it has to do with plants that grow around them at#all since these 'green clovers but where some of them are variously spotted in red' patches happen to be next to patches of weeds/#grouncover that also have red stems and stuff.) but so in the yard it is rare to find a red clover#and also rare to find a four leaf clover. so a RED four leaf clover is the most rare... special child..#5. bapy son on the heating pad (featuring my stinky little toast shaped 2ds lol... i wonder if theyve been obsolete so long that maybe#3ds are actually affordable now (under $100).. hrmm...)#6. Another wii fit mingame score. I'm not sure if this is even lower than the other ones or anything. I never go back to compare them lol#if a score seems good enough to possibly be my best I just take apicture of it anyway. I should probably at some point check what#the 'best' even actually is. I wish the wii always told you ur Best score instead of just your Last score on those games. It does on every#other game but seemingly not the daily fitness check in minigame ones. hrmm..#7. little clovery things covered in beautiful water droplets#8. sky again. of course#photo diary
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i know ive been super quiet here since my seizure bc life is Difficult. but uh, probs gonna even more quiet bc work is hell rn AND our ball python Atlas passed away two nights ago so my mental is Pretty Fucking Low
#mild vent#animal death ment tw#i literally do not have the spoons to go into any of it rn so apologies to anyone not in my personal server#and thus not getting the actual in depth talks i can sometimes manage#expecting that for the foreseeable future im just gonna hop on here occasionally to put posts in the queue#was gonna try to keep up w my artblogs queue more#but looks like im probs just gonna let it go silent again for a bit when that queue runs out#im tired. im so fucking tired#any one thing happening could be manageable but life just wont stop kicking me while im down#i went from doing the best ive ever done mentally#to at minimum two intense crying sessions a day
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i think i've finally come to understand why i'm so bad at communicating with friends 👍 at one point or another i've thought i was in love with every single person i've ever been friends with (for the most part, at least) because i don't expect other people to like me. OBVIOUSLY this is not true but platonic feelings are not dissimilar to romantic ones (baseline they're the same: you want to love and be loved by someone) but i always end up realizing that i'm not in love with them, just that they matter to me very much and i wouldn't know what do to w/o their presence in my life. BUT this brings me to facet number 2 of my awful communication skills: i hate it when things Get Real. i find myself retreating any time it seems like Something Could Change in my day-to-day life due to them being around and "forcing" the change. i run away from talking to one of my only irl friends on almost a daily basis bc i dread the idea of having to do anything she might want me to do. i think, at the end of the day, my problem might just be that i don't want to change... ANYWAYS
#i actually think the funniest example of this comes from the irl guy friend i think i actually DO have romantic feelings for#i never used to have feelings for him but i always kind of nursed the idea of such a thing (as i said i think i could be in love with most#friends before i realize i'm not - but with him specifically i never had a moment where i realized i... wasn't?) also my previously#aforementioned irl friend kind of insinuated he might have feelings for me or we might end up with one another and now every time i think#abt him i think about THAT so.#anyways a few years ago he came by my house and picked me up and we got ice cream and talked for hours bc we have a lot in common#and he actually manages to keep in contact with me despite how hard it is (how hard i make it) to talk to me on a consistent basis lol#like we don't talk a LOT but he's also the one who convinced me to contact my former other irl best friend that i hadn't talked to in 6 yrs#anyways back to what i was talking abt from a few years ago... it was 4 yrs ago at this point but after the ice cream - i got a job#and we talked a lot - he took me and my irl bff out but she had a HUGE fight with her bf and he tracked her down and it was. a disaster#but after that they made up (lucikly she broke up with him not too long after lmao) but me and him were put in the middle of it#and anyways we went to the mall with the annoying couple LMAO but we broke off and it was just... really nice to be with him?#and then we went to walmart and rented a movie and went back to my irl's apartment and i tried to dye his hair in her bathroom LMAO#and it just felt really natural to be close to him and whatnot. we really get along and i really don't dislike him and i'm not NOT into him#but yeah anyways a few days later he messaged me and asked if he could pick me up from work but i told him no because at that point i was.#afraid. because i had a dream that i had kissed hik and he turned into rick sanchez and drowned LMFAOOO IT SOUNDS RETARDED BUT.#like i think the point of the dream was that if i showed him that i had some kind of feelings for him he would change or die or disappear?#i always assume the worst. but yeah the dream literally put me off so bad that i cut contact with him for almost 2 years#because i was afraid of him and i was afraid of my life changing#idk. maybe i should give it a try now. i'm still scared but you never know.#i at least wanna say 'thanks' for him convincing me to message my friend from 6 years ago so 🤷♀️ who knows
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You should become a muslim.
I don't ever plan on joining any kind of organized religion, because i already know that the stuff i believe won't mesh with any specific one. Um. So thanks but no thanks !
#horse.txt#i believe everything has a soul#reincarnation is real#theres no afterlife (good or bad)#so existence isn't about earning your way into a vip club in the sky#it's about collecting as many experiences as possible#good and bad big and small#kindness is natural and so is cruelty--all creatures will be inclined towards one or the other and theres no way to change that fact#so its best to just focus on whatever you can manage. no one is required to try to change the world for the better#that is an opt in activity. the natural way to live is to seek your own happiness--so if thats all you can manage#then just do that#organized religion has never worked for me; i grew up going to christian churches and i hate it#and even doing group pagan events feels off and disingenuous to me--and its strictly a Me thing its not to do with the religions themselves#though i do genuinely hate christianity with a fiery burning passion that grows with every passing day#i do not care that not all Christians are 'bad' because its becoming increasingly obvious to me that even still#being Christian Keeps those people from being as good as they COULD have been#'hate the sin love the sinner' or you could just learn to have compassion for your fellow man and quit being a debby downer#sins don't fucking exist theyre just activities that you don't like. just say thats what it is. applying morality to everything under#the sun is just semantics. you are wasting our time when we could LITERALLY be outside eating fruit and watching the clouds#grow up#sorry didnt mean to get aggressive my train of thought just does whatever sometimes
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my anxiety levels have been all over the place since yesterday. just all around feeling gross about the news in general, all the terrible things happening, global warming, etc.
it is, quite honestly, more than one brain can handle!
#[static]#trying my best to find peace and i manage it most days#but there are some days when it feels like the world is falling apart all around me and it puts The Fear in me#constantly thinking about what the point is going to work every day when i could be using that time to learn something useful#or do something meaningful#thankful for the neighborhood i live in because if things go to shit i literally live next to two farms and a bunch of really cool ppl#getting to that point in my late-late 20s where i want to build community but its been hard with covid / ppl not taking it seriously anymor
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/39366936
crawled out of my dungeon to churn out a yui/megu crack drabble send h e l p
#i had this thought that refused to leave bc of that yui’s thoughts on megu thing#i could have written literally anything else but nooooooooooooo#i prefer daimegu and rioyui too lollll. but o h w e l l—#anyways stan dai👀👀👀 he’s the best ft4 guy ok no question👀👀👀👀#added to my personal cringefic compilation#fedora throttle4#it is suiyoubi my dudes#also i fced wolf pt2 on ex pls be happy for me (👁‿👁)#(jk but i’m still really surprised that i managed to fc it… like brooooo my thumbs were aching by the time the final chorus hit…)#(tbh the only thing that helped me to not panic as much as i fced it was telling myself ‘dw the combo broke at the start so nothing matters’#can’t believe that strat worked tbh (👁‿👁))
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been out of zoloft for 2 days feeling dizzy w a headache my refill is in my apartment mailbox and I don't have a key and im scared im gonna start getting the Brain Zaps lol
#idk anyone in new york know an ssri dealer lmfao#ive tried all the stuff to get it btw#building doesnt keep spare keys#roommate has mail key but is in another state (will overnight ship them tomorrow-in box so it has to go to package room)#called meds provider and on the 5th attempt managed to talk to a nurse who asked a dr if they could send an emergency rx to a local pharmacy#they said they couldnt cos its out of state#my best bet rn is to wait around in the lobby all day tomorrow for the mail delivery person and beg them to let me into my mailbox#but idk if their rules would let them#short of that i guess i just wait till i get the keys#and hope that my meds are actually in there...#i literally wrote in my address when i ordered my refill 'deliver to pkg room' and yet#the usps tracking thing said it was delivered to mailbox#:/#anyway taking off work tomorrow to sit in the metal chair by the mailboxes lol
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