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joelletwo · 22 days

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wrestling with the 4devas bitchslap again to convince myself its fine if graveyard wins the best ep tourney: it's not the other bloggers who are wrong, it's me

not a complete response to but definitely in conversation with and asking some of the same questions again as @reductionisms's 4devas essay, which tries to square gintoki's "life doesn't need to be fun, i just need you to live" being a series-sanctioned message he's given to villains as an arc-concluding moral continuously up until 4devas with it here being an incorrect worldview that needs to be (physically) corrected by shinpachi, the straightman tonal signpost of gintama

a conflict i have been perplexed by ever since i got to this line on my first watch a year or two ago, since i've seen this line before! all over fandom! as part of the general "dont [bottom text] kill yourself" motivational messaging of gintama that i love!

and, briefly, when i hit 4devas i was also in the middle of being really frustrated by the new arc pattern i was seeing crop up: i loved the villains-turned sympathetic-turned someone worth saving by gintoki tune of the first half of gintama, but it fell massively flat for me in Yoshiwara in Flames, where i was never convinced to be on housen's side but had to watch him get a heartwarming redemptive death at the side of the woman he abused anyways.

then shortly after i had the same exact experience in Red Spider with jiraia, and i thought, if this is what gintama is gonna do with its shitty dudes from now on im gonna quit the fucking show. and then shortly after that i met jirochou and saw him cut down otose the woman he loved (under a raining sky!!! the fucking sky motifs!!! the signpost im about to watch a dude be shittily violent to women and be expected to feel sorry for him about it) and saw too much red to really take in the rest of the arc level-headedly or care about anything in it lol.

so it was written off in my mind as the 'otose almost gets fridged' arc until i rewatched it this week. then i had to remember, oh yeah, there's a ton of political maneuvering fakeouts in this arc that i never actually squared back with how the plot presented itself prior to the reveals, so i'd still been thinking about the "fakeout" plot. then i read the manga version with all the "truths" in mind from the start, and finally i felt like i could understand what this arc is doing a little better.

(way) tldr (4.4k words. sorry): do i love this arc? eh. do i still hate it? eh. but it's doing stuff!

first, i was able to see an echo in all the "actually i was planning to betray you the whole time" "actually i was working to help you the whole time" plot beats of what sorachi does with the larger edo/universe story further into the back half of the manga. if i ever sound like i didnt enjoy or wasnt convinced by the execution of these "reveals," it's because i didnt and wasnt, lol. but it's fun that he had fun with them i guess.

the arc starts with pirako ingratiating herself into yorozuya, then having a classic "bump into you and pretend to be injured to extort you" encounter w her dad's gang. to resolve this without escalating into violence, gintoki... does it back to them, which is really funny. but thus the tone is set for the arc of: DISHONEST APPROACHES TO CONFLICT.

pirako isnt honest about her overall intentions the, like, seven different times that she "admits her real ones." kada plays at peacekeeper in the devas while being the ultimate person scheming to get the upper hand over everyone else in the end. (she's also secretly harusame, evil amanto outsider who acts as a unifying force for the kabukicho fighting itself to band together against and expel: sorachi's favorite move! the problem was never internal, it's the shadowy REAL antagonists who infiltrated us)

jirochou and otose are ultimately doing a pantomime of conflict to try to keep temperatures down and escalations from breaking out, so no one they care about has to get hurt. gintoki doesn't know this until the end, but he follows in their footsteps after his encounter with them in the graveyard: he plays at having given up to the rest of yorozuya so they'll leave and escape the coming kabukicho war, the same thing otose was trying with him. it fails both times. i'm really not sure why gintoki and otose thought it would work, honestly. they should know their kids are stubborn as hell.

but gintoki is in a bind because of the things he needs to protect, and all of his actions are primarily in service of that, to the detriment of how he'd prefer to act if he were less restricted. he is unsurprised and unoffended to hear saigou is only willing to warn them, not help them, because her son is in danger if she acts directly. all four devas are, seemingly, being mutually restrained this way, holding back even when blatantly manipulated to do so. the other constant of this arc: everyone is dishonest, and no one wants to risk losing what they have.

gintoki understands that! of course! he's had to make that calculus before, after all :)

and this arc is just one big cliff scene echo: the entire graveyard scene pushing gintoki to emotional regression because he thinks he's losing another parent figure, one he's just seen the Gintoki Figure of the arc cut down, no less (takasugi stolen valor when he goes berserk against him and only ends up uselessly bleeding out on the ground about it, honestly). otose goes into this willingly so gintoki can live. he accepts this decision because he values protecting her values (her kids living on) and is briefly broken by it (the story says, before giving him shinpachi to "put him back on track"). prior to the bitchslap, after saying he just wants them to live, even if it has to be without him, he says:

i dont have a good understanding of when we start getting reveals of gintoki's backstory versus foreshadowing because i went into gintama already knowing most of it, but definitely by the recent red spider where we get our first real look at (or really, first listen to) shouyou. but here we actually get some of what gintoki felt about it, which he keeps closely guarded even when the whole truth comes out: he's done his best to survive having lost, but it was so unbearable he can't face losing again.

(also, honorable mention backstory echo, the person calling him a brother sets his home on fire to drive him and his parent figure out of town. as i liveblogged: this one would really hurt gintoki if gintoki cared about anything oboro ever did!)

but with the shinpachi story-rerouting, they get the good end, keep everyone (otose, yorozuya, all of kabukicho, even pirako and her dad - everyone but kada) safe without having to sacrifice a single thing, even keep gintoki hopeful for this outcome. so, as goose points out, we are left to understand that there could have been a good end on the cliff, that something is different here than there, and, skipping a lot of math, that that is the people around gintoki.

which i do find really funny to imagine as a slam on takasugi and katsura. sorry you kids suck too much, your teacher dies bc u were cringefail. but lets look at it.

everyone is dishonest, no one wants to risk what they have: gintoki rallies himself to keep fighting but is determined to do it alone. kagura and shinpachi fight him on this; they can't leave because they don't want to lose their home, they can't let him fight alone because they don't want to lose him. they're just as restricted by what they have to keep safe, but their only option is to act where everyone else's is inaction. shinpachi says:

if i may skip over the bitchslap itself for now, gintoki does consent to let his allies fight with him after it. yorozuya stands alone against saigou, who's heavily demoralized but resigned, strongarmed into fighting them by the threat to her son. but on seeing their resolve to keep protecting their own precious home and family she says:

and, to skip straight to my thought, i think this is what turns the tides back in their favor. there are more twists and turns to the fight. pirako equates what binds saigou, which she herself equates to what binds the yorozuya, to what binds her:

(with an intentional distinction that she's willing to actively destroy the others', as opposed to their purely self defensive fighting, which is echoed at some point in her distinguishing gintoki from jirochou in the same way, that jirochou not only lives to protect like gintoki but is willing to destroy in the process. i don't find that part as interesting, but it's more fuel to the power of having something to protect as a driving force as an arc theme.)

so now all three stand on the same ground, absolutely unwilling to give up what they hold dear, but all their cards are on the table. they aren't dealing in 12 dimensions of tricksy defensive pre-emptive moves anymore. they know it wouldnt work, anyways, since they all know their drives to protect are the same and no one will be talked into backing down. now they can directly duke it out and let the winner be determined that way, on strength of will. even before the actual circumstances change, the fight somehow feels freer seeing how inevitable it is. and with everything out in the open, yorozuya can now protect each other and saigou's son, taking out one side of the conflict.

(and with everything out in the open, the ultimate 4devas villain can become the single person who continues to betray the others, kada, whose further machinations - with everything out in the open! - saigou (and later yorozuya) can choose to protect pirako from. everyone wins! because everything was out in the open! do you see where i'm going)

and so we come back to the question: gintoki is corrected, the arc is rerailed to the better outcome. so is the correction justified?

what does the correction accomplish outside of its moment? most convincingly to me of goose's presented options, i also think it's done as a thematic shift, a, okay, just live was a strategy that worked before but now doesn't suffice, so we need something more.

as to why this is needed now and not earlier or later...tldr bad planning <3 but like.

we have, prior to this, a consistent thrust of arcs where gintoki teaches people to lose. as well, while we meet the harusame and we visit space and we get the barest glimpses of takasugi's weird shadowy background moves there, largely we're dealing with kabukicho characters and kabukicho stories. we see or only hear about the shogun for short comedic moments only. we've largely dropped the series intro focus on things like the shinsengumi or hasegawa acting as foreign diplomats. it's a local series, a hometown series, a kabukicho and not even an edo at large series, a personal story about gintoki making personal connections with his personal experience as a flawed person with a flawed approach to life that has let him, chronic slacker, get by on the bare minimum.

at this moment, chapter 300, we have a slow trickle of gintoki backstory starting to come out to us. we've recently expanded the story focus to include yoshiwara, which gets a callout in this arc by kada to keep it relevant. we have an arc of sorachi testing out plot beats that he'll use again for the endgame, in all the political maneuvering and alliancing and betraying and shadowy outsider space governmenting, where he's also doing a lot of echoing of that backstory that only becomes clear later. so it's possible he's thinking about shifting gears and setting up for the eventual endgame, which means getting out of the episodic cycle so things can stick.

and after this arc, to my opinion and memory, we stop getting the classic gintama flavor sympathizable'd antagonists. a lot of the bigger arcs don't even have clear Big Shot antagonists anymore, being more about the shouyoucore theme of characters fighting against themselves, or if there is one they're always explicitly part of the Shadow Government now, a unified and more daunting force than someone they can win over with an inspiring gintoki interaction.

so 4devas does act as a turning point at least in some way. and it's not possible to say this definitively, since all gintama arcs are ultimately never going to be about gintoki or his friends Actually losing something instead of beating the odds, but it does feel like theres a different flavor to, say, dekobokko with its direct look at how chars lives could be different and better and they will still choose to keep struggling as themselves. and Kintama arc definitely doesn't feel like an early days arc, like it can only resolve the way it does with a gintoki who is now able to face his past and the possibility of losing again and again and again (now with, natch, his faith that yorozuya will by his side when he does).

why now, after 300 chapters of letting it sit ignored in the back of his brain working out perfectly fine except when it doesn't (the very reminder of shouyou in a fight making him go Demon Mode, which is like regular gintoki but worse at fighting, bc he is so unprepared to think about shouyou)? well i personally am in big favor of the "take a decade off" strategy for facing problems. it worked for me too. realistically watsonianly its nice to let things percolate in the brain and do some of the processing behind the scenes until its less immediately painful. and he's made many bonds over these 300 chapters, shown in this arc when the whole town rallies behind him, that are there to support him when he needs it now and weren't there before.

realistically doylistly eh. bad planning.

and so we come back to the question: gintoki is corrected, the series as a result is rerailed to a writing space where things can start changing (leave the episodic, as you guys say, sazae-san format). it's useful in the future. so is the correction justified in terms of what comes before it? was the correction needed?

thinking about the bitchslap leads to thinking about the cliff scene leads to (sorry kagura and katsura, you guys arent really relevant here) pitting shinpachi and takasugi against each other in how they act with something on the line they can't bear to give up.

i don’t need the lesson of 4devas to apply logistically to the cliff scene. once they were set up on that chessboard, frozen in their assigned places as a backstory, it’s not like takasugi could’ve power of friendship’d his way out of being physically retrained if he decided he wanted to. it’s set up as a forced choice, it has to play out as a forced choice.

but we see that even before it’s asked of him, takasugi is willing, prepared, unbothered to give up his own life for shouyou’s. this is, goose lays out in the sequel, the cardinal sin in gintama - a teacher shouldn’t outlive their student. it would have been especially egregious to shouyou, whose whole desired life’s purpose is to raise students who can outlive him and outgrow him, take his lessons and go out into the world and do their own thing with them. takasugi doesn’t expect to do this and doesn’t seem to see a point in the possibility if shouyou isn’t back with them.

though we can also think of shouyou as a little too quickly willing to give up on the cliff - sorry, gintoki, the suicidal guy has thought about it for .02 seconds and decided the best outcome is for you to kill him even though he could get out of this no problem. maybe its no wonder gintoki gave up too. can we ask katsura what he would’ve done?

and is takasugi different from shinpachi there? he rejects the mentor’s attempt to exchange his own life for his. he’s not willing to consider a life without him.

but shinpachi is convinced no one is going to die. because they’ll be there together. incredibly naive - shinpachi and kagura, restricted to one option by what they need to protect like everyone is in 4devas, have acting as that one option because they are still free in a way gintoki and the other adults aren't. they’ve never actually experienced the impossible choice that forces you to give up, so they can act as if there isn’t one - what else would they do? why would they think to give up?

but gintoki is defined by having lived the impossible choice. its built into the foundation of him as a character and leaks out everywhere. he couldn’t have relied on his friends on the cliff because they were quite forcibly removed from the picture as an option, not by his or their choice. its written as an inevitability, logistics we find out later be damned.

if we refocus to 4devas, we can look at the Gintoki Figure for a different angle. jirochou, after he and gintoki resolve the arc conflict by being able to team up because they - say it with me - put everything out in the open, tells gintoki about his impetus for abandoning his family and coming back to his wayward life in kabukicho, the death of otose's husband.

it's, um, another now really obvious parallel to gintoki, lol. characters talk about how jirochou does everything he does in this arc to try to atone for his failure to both otose and tatsugorou, and i guess thats true bc he was written that way but he has an odd way of showing it, but anyways he resolves that, despite his guilt over this, all he can do now is keep living and keep protecting what they loved together. he's come to the usual gintama message all on his own, reinforcing that this is the correct way to live in this series. he had his own unavoidably shitty situation, and he came to terms with it.

so then where did jirochou go wrong, in the narrative's eyes (other than abandoning one woman and their child to deal drugs in the town of his other woman while ignoring her)? was there a point he could've changed how their trio's story played out? but he loved and trusted tatsugorou, and he was happy to step aside and let him be the one by their otose's side. i doubt he would have been happy stealing her away even if it were possible.

but if we look at the resolution tool of 4devas... he never put everything out in the open!!! everyone knows he loved otose, but in more of an open secret way. in classic romance plot, he never confessed for second male lead rejection closure. indeed, in the closest we ever get to a main character having a romantic plot in gintama, the very ending of the arc flirts with him doing just that now that he's made a little progress with the arc message, with the entire cast of the arc expecting him to (and interrupting before he can).

but if he had when they were young. if he had been honest with his friends. could it have opened up other options that weren't available on his own, that they didnt know to offer? i have a preferred one lol. but u can get creative with all sorts of life paths that avoid tatsugorou dying that way or, at the least, jirochou feeling chained to a shameful life (living in a town he doesn't go out in to protect a woman he doesnt talk to and feeling like he doesnt deserve the family he abandoned for this) because of it.

and then if we take this and rewind back to the cliff... we get to grind my favorite ax, "shouyou shouldve told literally anyone literally anything about his deal." if gintoki knew more about shouyou, they could've faced his horrors together, the whole time. he couldve known that shouyou was being literal calling himself a demon and not internalized his own identity as one for life just because shouyou bonded with him over it. i truly genuinely think the logical conclusion of all of gintama's big messages are that shouyou and gintoki should have been more open with each other.

but i don't think sorachi thinks that. and, you know, by 4devas rules, the unriskable precious things he was protecting by staying silent were his students' humanity, and secondarily his own fragilely newly hopeful heart that literally couldnt stand another 10 millionth round of rejection (killed himself and then went on a 12 year rampage over it. girl i would too).

and takasugi really isn't dishonest about what's going on in his head when he tells us he expects to die for shouyou. that's as cards on the table as i could ask. gintoki is, a little bit, by omission. he does what i'd want him to here - tells takasugi try just not dying - but doesn't give him a reason to, and doesn't tell him he has no plans of letting anyone die for shouyou.

so what goes wrong on the cliff - shouyou is happy, gintoki is happy, oboro's even kind of happy, katsura is irrelevant - is that takasugi is blindsided (whoops) by their silent agreement that betrays the one he thought he and gintoki had. and then ruins everyone's party about it and spends the next ten years doing so for good measure.

which is also, basically, what shinpachi is going through that prompts the bitchslap, too. he thought they were a team, that they had each others backs, not that gintoki is a one-way protector of them. he is blindsided by gintoki lying to and tricking them and hiding things from them. he is hurt by gintoki feeling hopeless all by himself when he could share that with them and be encouraged by their endless child optimism.

and would it need to have changed anything on the cliff? in the moment after the bitchslap, what contributes to gintoki changing his mindset is tama telling him, we trust that you're capable bc youve always shown us that, can you trust us this time? when, later in the arc, gintoki seems to regress by sending kagura and shinpachi away, he asks them to trust that he's still trusting them, relying on them to help shoulder his burden, and in return they know he's staying alive, not self sacrificing. maybe it would've helped just to feel on the same team and not shut out, to be able to trust gintoki like gintoki was trusting shouyou?

so. two paralleled instances of gintoki making a bad situation worse by keeping to himself and being too self sufficient. that feels clear cut that feels fine im okay with that as a takeaway. do i think its exactly what sorachi had in mind while writing this, as opposed to just a good series 'hey lean on your friends' moment to read cool and tug at the heartstrings? eh lol. i think theres definitely room to read takasugi into this arc (i still need to refind the takagin 4devas post...) but its not so baked in that i think he was a PRIORITY in the plotting.

but is the shinpachi SCOLDING necessary is the scolding justified... and yes its in response to life doesnt need to be fun i just want you to live. still a confusing framing i can't immediately square. but/and more immediately its directly responding. to gintoki opening up to them about his insecurities!!

which, as said, he doesnt do!! he doesnt talk about his failures! its basically like, here and to hijikata that one time and otherwise even when we know all the facts about what happened we still never hear gintoki himself talk about it. (so he really DOESNT learn the lesson here either. he stays dissociated and triggered every time utsuro comes up. he tries to solve the altana baby problem on his own. he doesnt talk to his new friends OR his old friends. bwah. gintoki. silver soul.)

so this is like. its just in the wrong order!! its just in a baffling order lol. if you want gintoki to share his burden do you need to punch him when he shares it. does it also need to sound like you're blaming him for not being capable of upholding his promise to protect anyone when thats the insecurity thats got him all discombobulated this arc in the first place (a whole set of notes i took on this that i didnt find a place for in this post)?? its so weeeeiiiiiirddd lol i dont liiikeee itttttt. theres plenty of things shinpachi can validly punch gintoki for but this is such a weird one.

so i guess. having a clearer understanding of this arc do i hate it less? YES honestly. i hate fakeout plots generally they irritate me but everything... more or less makes sense by gintama standards now that i have the whole plot in mind.

do i hate jirochou less SORT OF? i enjoy him. in his individual relationships. i like his shitty dad deal i love shitty dads. i like him pining for otose who genuinely likes him but also brings up her husband every sentence she says to him just to keep him down. i like his parallels with gintoki that they both explicitly acknowledge and find macho comfort in. hes still not theeeeeeeee most well-developed gintama antagonist but you know? i at least think otose and pirako would want to be around him after this.

do i feel like i have a clearer understanding of the bitchslap moment. NOT CONVINCED I DO. i feel like its going to be one of those things that slips in and out of my understanding like sand in cupped hands. i have a tentative understanding of it that i dont think sorachi actually had in mind. so i dont think ive solved it lol.

will i be cursed to think about 4devas forever? god i hope not. am i okay with it beating farewell shins in the polls. god i fucking hope it does. in the horrible timeline where i have to see 305 make it all the way and then lose i guess id rather it be to this one than to hijigin. consider this poll propaganda?

#sopping wet gintoki posting

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angelicmichael · 3 years

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Imminient Annihilation sounds so dope - Chapter Ten

Michael Langdon X Reader

Summary: Reader and Michael continue to work through their issues and finally start to warm up to each other even further.

Words: 5.9k+ …oops

Warnings: just normal IA warnings (swear words, manipulation, unhealthy relationships, enemies to lovers, slowburn, etc) anddd maybeee a bit of fluff 👁

A/N: hey guys! Sorry I haven’t updated this in a few months but hopefully this is satisfactory hehe. This chapter is kinda a turning point in the fic so I hope u guys like it!! Also I watched Jennifer’s Body as I finished this so.. do what u must w that information 😌 djdjd

Previous Chapter

Rain was never something you were accustomed too. Spending so much time in Los Angeles had made you partially spoiled when it came to the weather - which is why you knew immediately your day was going to be shit when you woke up to rain.

You tried to convince yourself that the emotions you were feeling weren’t complete disdain but rather just a pessimistic version of indifference.. or that’s what you hoped anyway.

You knew realistically that your day wasn’t already doomed before it even started; and that the rain was nothing more than a mere inconvenience.. However; you still felt justified in complaining, considering today was the day you were ripping the band-aide off and moving in to the apartment Michael had oh so graciously chosen to give you.

Your pessimistic mood surrounding the entire situation was inevitable, and that was something you didn’t even bother to resist or fight. It didn’t take long for your thoughts to quickly go south as you quickly packed. Hatred that seemingly came out of nowhere (but that you realistically knew was only temporarily dormant) wasted no time in blinding your judgement - making you feel a nearly nauseating amount of jealousy and anger for people who actually seemed to be fucking happy in their relationships and werent forced into.. whatever shitty living situation you knew you were bound to find yourself in.

An apartment with no strings attached was way too fucking simple, and you knew it was too good to be true. You knew you were basically walking into a trap, and for what reason were you doing that so willingly? Just so that maybe Michael could start to tolerate you? You resented yourself for even agreeing to this but you also understood you really had no other option.

However; personal feelings aside.. you still had a mission to accomplish. You still had to attempt to seduce Michael, and even though you were doing a shit job at that so far - you still had to try. You knew realistically it was only a matter of time before Cordelia would ask about the progress you've made, and you would have to tell her something.

You had to do this.

That's why you were (semi) blindly choosing to move in to a building you knew you absoluetly couldnt afford; and why you were sucking up your pride and choosing to become semi reliant on Michael.

No one from the coven knew, and for the time being you intended to keep it that way. After all, even though Mallory didnt exactly know that Michael gave you a whole ass fucking apartment - your sure she probably suspected that something important happened between you and Michael just from the short conversation you three harbored together. But for the time being, you didnt have to worry about that. You had bigger things that were on your mind.. like the actual apartment door itself that you currently stood in front of.

You held the keys limply in your hand, your bag slumped next to you as you procrastinated something as fucking simple as opening a door. How pathetic.

You continued to stall in the hallway regardless - thankful there was no one passing through to witness how ridiculous you looked. Your gaze fell south down to your keys which were cold in your hand. Dripping slowly with the subtle rainwater that managed to linger on them, along with the rest of your clothes.

Your skin stung from the cold that seemed stubborn to leave, and a nice change of clothes and a hot shower wouldnt be the absolute worst thing in the world..

Fuck.

You bit your lip in order to prevent letting the profanity from rolling off your tongue. Quickly getting a better grip on the keys (which only made you somehow colder) and numbly, hastily unlocking the door.

You pushed it open, letting the door hit the wall and taking a few steps inside before dropping your bag to the floor.. as well as your jaw.

No words could possibly convey how you felt as you noticed how the room was already illuminated with not only natural light from the already huge windows you could see.. but also with a warm, yellow artificial glow.

Was someone already here?

What the fuck?

The hatred and resentment you previously felt toward others earlier rapidly started to return - except this time it was targeted at one very specific person.

It didnt even register in your mind that the light could've been left on by accident or that people besides Michael actually existed that could be present in the room but.. you didnt care. Anger was the only emotion that was solely present in your body as you fully abandoned your bag by the door. Advancing forward; and only feeling more shock and disbelief with every step you took at the thought that he could very possibly be in (what was supposed to be) your space.

"Michael, I swear to God-"

"Y/n?” said a soft, feminine voice.

It was practically automatic how you froze. Just getting close enough to notice that it wasn’t Michael after all that was on your bed in your new studio apartment, but a woman sat on your bed instead.

For about two seconds, you were scared it was Madison but.. that was a stupid assumption within itself. The company you were with was from a far different nature than of which Madison was, even though at first glance the two woman might look or sound similar. There were so many qualities that distinguished Mallory from Madison. Brown, auburn hair.. dark eyeshadow.. and her classic black boots. It didn’t take long for your anger to fade away as you tried to not think about how logically this still didn’t make sense - walking closer to your bed anyway.

"How did you get in here? And since when did you ever break into peoples rooms?" You asked with a laugh.

Mallory echoed your laugh back, seemingly watching you and your behavior. As if she was expecting you to do something or to act a certain way.. like perhaps leave.

"I didnt break into your apartment but.. you should probably sit down." She spoke, before nodding off to her side. Nonverbally suggesting you to sit next to her.

You did as you were told. Noticing briefly before you sat down how nice the apartment actually was.. including the bed.

The walls, and most of everything in the apartment was a solid black. It looked sleek, and even though black paint made most rooms look small - the natural light helped keep things looking open which you appreciated. It was no surprise that the bed matched the dark theme too. The sheets were silky, black satin. You almost laughed at how comfortable the bed was once you sat next to Mallory, the entire situation was so ridiculous it nearly hurt for you to not laugh out loud. The two of you sat in the silence for a moment.. you were each incredibly anxious, that was more than apparent.

You looked up at Mallory, expecting her to speak first and explain herself since after all.. shes the one who broke into your apartment but she still remained quiet.. Stalling, you could only guess.

"So, why are you here? How did you even get in here? Is everything okay?" You asked, your words speedy and rushed.

Panic started to temporarily set in when you realized that something could be serisouly wrong with the coven, even though you knew how completly irrational it was to think that way with no evidence. What if witch hunters found them? What if someone preformed the seven wonders and it went wrong? What if the plan had suddenly changed with Michael?

Mallory seemed to pick on how anxious you suddenly were, putting a hand on your upper arm before making you meet her gaze. Her soft, hazel brown eyes immeadietly making your breathe slow. That was another reason you were so thankful for Mallory - the soothing, calming effect she seemed to have on everyone she met was something you never took for granted.. Espically now.

"Hey, nothing's wrong and nothing happened. I promise. I just wanted to see you and talk to you, and I figured we should catch up after Michael basically made me leave," Mallory explained.

You quickly nodded. Feeling guilt start to creep into your system once you remembered how Michael previously treated her.

"Yeah, youre right. I've been wanting to see you anyway and I'm sorry I didnt just call you last night or something.. and I know I cant control him but I'm still sorry for how Michael treated you. I shouldn't have brought you into that-"

"(Y/n), stop," Mallory said urgently. Shaking her head slightly in disagreement with your words. "Sure, Michael was acting like a dick but.. it's nothing I'm not exactly accustomed too. It was harmless," she ended her words with a smile. One that was meant to comfort you both at the epiphany her words brought.

You sat with her words for a moment. The realization suddenly hitting you like a truck-

"Wait.. what? Do you know Michael?"

Mallory fell completely silent. Looking at you almost in a.. guilty manner. Her gaze fell downwards before she looked up to meet yours once more, licking her lips anxiously before she uttered out a quiet reply.

"I wasnt going to tell you because I knew it would make you upset but.. Michael called me last night-"

"And you answered?" Your voice raised up a few octaves unwillingly. Threatening to break as you tried to process what you were hearing.

As much as you wanted to immeadietly jump to conclusions, you had to remind yourself that this was Mallory you were talking too. Your best friend, Mallory. You knew she would never do anything to intentionally hurt you.

You noticed Mallory was also starting to get tense. Her spine suddenly a bit too straight and her shoulders were rigid. It was nice to know you werent the only person in this situation who was feeling this way, although you would be lying if you were to say that you werent curious for why Mallory felt tense.

"At first, no but he kept calling so I figured it would cause no harm to see what he wanted so, I answered," Mallory said cautiously.

It was obvious she had more to say and as much as you wanted her to keep talking and fully explain herself - you were more than happy that you didnt have to cut her off again. It was too much. This was too much.

You pinched the bridge of your nose before loudly exhaling with a shallow growl. Not really caring that it probably was coming off like you were mad at Mallory when in reality, that wasn’t the case. Mallory wasn’t the problem; you were really just beyond fucking pissed at Michael.

But at this point.. that wasnt new news.

"I told him that we shouldnt be talking, but he insisted," Mallory continued with a shrug.

You tried to sit up straight again; trying to exhale some of the pure fucking anger that was currently coursing through your system. Your vision was spotted black when you opened your eyes - your gaze pointed upwards at the smooth, blank ceiling. Quickly wishing that you were anywhere else, or really anyone else at the moment.

What you wouldnt kill to swap bodies again.. but then again, who knows what the hell Michael was currently doing at the moment.. He couldnt be trusted.

That was more than obvious now.

You should've known that he would contact Mallory, but how he even got her number was beyond you.. Unless-

"How did he even get your number?" You asked. Your tone strikingly calm.

Mallory looked incredibly spooked when your head suddenly snapped over to look at her. As if she was worried you were angry at her still, and as much as you wanted to reassure her otherwise, you really didnt have the energy to do so anymore. Not at the moment anyway.

"You can't be mad when I tell you the answer, okay?" She said softly.

Your features immeadietly softened at her words. The rest of your body relaxed as well; your shoulders dropping and your jaw unclenching.

"Mallory, I could never be mad at you. You could never piss me off, i'm just.. frustrated at Michael. It's not at you, I swear," you said. Trying your best to make your words sound reassuring and genuine.

Mallorys reaction wasnt one that was verbal but immeadite nonetheless. Her arms suddenly shot out and wrapped themselves around you. Her body temporarily pressing into yours as your hands went to her back, before she quickly broke the hug.

"Promise?" Mallory prompted. Brown eyes looking diligently into yours.

"Yeah.. I promise. Just tell me what that idiot did,” you said halfheartedly.

"So.. I've had his number for a while. Not for too long but just since you two switched. But, we never really talked," Her voice stalled as she watched your reaction. Your mouth grew dry as you really tried to let it sink in that they've known eachother since- well for atleast a week. "But I knew immeadietly that it wasnt you.. that day. I'm sorry I lied, but Michael made me promise."

"Why didnt you just tell me?"

Mallory looked at you in a guilty manner. Her lips pursing shut as she looked solemnly at her shoes, avoiding eye contact. You knew exactly why she was being quiet - she didnt want to admit why she had lied but.. the answer was pretty obvious.

Even though Mallory was one of the strongest witches - almost stronger than Cordelia on some days, she still was scared of Michael and that was nothing worth holding a grudge over. After all he was still the antichrist, no matter how (mostly) harmless and idiotic he seemed to you now.

"Okay.. I guess that doesnt really matter," you admitted with a laugh. Figeting with your hands as you heard a shallow laugh omit also from Mallory, which made you smile. The shallow pit that resided in your stomach finally starting to let up. "But.. What did he call you about last night?"

Mallory hesitated again before giving you another subtle smile.

"It was mostly about you.. I know how you feel about him y/n, but its working. I promise you. Hes finally warming up to you. I just wish you could hear how he talks about you,” she spoke. Taking your hands into her soft, warm ones.

"I wish I believed that," You admitted.

"I wouldnt lie to you. Hes finally starting to warm up to you, plus it was obvious yesterday-"

"Yeah; It was obvious how strong he was coming onto you."

Mallory laughed again at your words. Shaking her head slightly in protest.

“Y/n you know that’s not true. The only reason why he was flirting with me was just to get to you.. I thought that was obvious.”

“It was obvious I just.. didn’t know that you knew that. I mean, Michael has Madison.. or he did so you think that would at least satisfy his flirting needs for a bit but.. Michael faking to be interested in you, that would mean he wanted a reaction out of me on purpose? Why would he-“

“You know why. You need to start cutting yourself slack and realize that maybee this rivalry is starting to be one sided.”

You pouted at her words at the realization that they actually held more truth in them than you were willing to admit. If Michael didn’t hate you anymore, if he was truly actually willing to be civil.. then why were you still so upset? Were you the one who was unintentionally causing problems now? Was it now you instead of Michael that was holding the relationship back?

How fucking stupid.

“I can’t trust him, Mallory. How can I when he and Madison literally tried to kill me. I can never forget that they did that to me.”

“I’m not asking you to forget what he did, y/n. I’m just saying that maybe it wouldn’t hurt to start having an open mind around him, and see where it gets you.”

You were struck silent, knowing that Mallory was completely right. If you wanted to have any hope at all of making things right with Michael (even though you really didn’t do anything wrong..) you would have to try a different approach because obviously; what you were doing now wasn’t working. Being snarky, and vaguely threatening him every chance you got was fun of course but- it wasn’t working. Even though Mallory was probably the sweetest person you knew, the fact your own best friend had to (very politely) make a intervention was.. not a good sign. Although, you knew Mallory was doing this for your best interest because if she didn’t say anything, then Cordelia certainly would.

And sadly, Mallory was actually right.

If you wanted things with Michael to advance any further; or to advance at all you needed to step things up but, you could always worry about that after Mallory left.

“So what, are you guys besties now or something?” You sneered.

“Shut up!” Mallory said with a laugh, playfully pushing you over a bit. “He’s barely even my acquaintance. The only reason he’s being nice to me is just to get to you, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. I mean that’s the goal-“

“Do you think that’s the only reason?” You interrupted.

Your throat automatically tightened after you spoke, the threat of your words potentially being true coaxing you to silence. Your not sure why the thought of Michael using you made you upset.. it’s not as if you didn’t think he was doing it before but this time it was different. Perhaps it was because you finally thought Michael actually had some type of interest in you.. and to have that suddenly ripped away?

That would leave you beyond broken.. you knew that for certain.

Mallory looked at you solemnly, as if she was already resenting her words before she had to say them outloud.

“Look, I don’t exactly know Michaels intentions and I’m not going to pretend too.. I don’t really think anyone does at this point but I do know that regardless of your feelings, or even his feelings that.. you have to try.”

You let out a loud exhale.

“I mean you said it yourself.. Michaels so unpredictable, there’s no point in guessing how he feels so.. maybe I should just.. ask him?”

Realistically you didn’t know how good of a idea that was- but.. trying to remain realistic was something you gave up on days ago. Pretty much the same day you switched and that definitely wasn’t a coincidence by any means.

As soon as Mallorys mouth opened, you heard three loud knocks. Quick and rapid with no hesitation between them. The apartment nearly shook with the force of whoever happened to be at your door, and you certainly didn’t doubt that your neighbors heard the knocking as well.

Mallory looked at you in utter confusion, but stayed on the bed nonetheless with no sign of getting up. Naturally, you found yourself scooting closer to the end of the bed, knowing it was you who was going to have to get the door.. and that made you scared shitless. Not because you were necessarily scared to open the door but because you had a horribly bad feeling on who was on the other side.. There was only one person that you knew of that was aware of where you lived, and you knew it wasn’t matience or staff.

You knew standing up was the logical thing to do but you still stalled. Hands starting to painfully dig into the soft, expensive sheets that lie underneath you. You mouthed a silent, ‘what the fuck?’ to Mallory but your head snapped back at the door..

Three more knocks which were only louder and more persistent than the last.

“Coming!” You quickly called out.

It was pure anxiety that fueled your next actions. You quickly stood up from the bed, trying to walk hurriedly to the door as fast as you could and trying your damn best not to think.. Hoping Mallory also had a idea of who was at the door and also happened to get the fuck out of view.

You didn’t want a repeat of yesterday happening again today, and you knew you wouldn’t hesitate to slap Michael if he tried to flirt with her again. Even though, you knew you weren’t supposed to act like that anymore.. but why should you have manners if Michael refused them as well?

Opening the door swiftly and without a second thought; you stood breathless as you saw a familiar blonde standing in front of you.

You both stared at each other at first - each not daring to have the balls to say ‘hello’ or anything else for that matter.. You noticed how Michael first eyed you up, fully looking up and down your body (as well as peering behind you, hopefully not making eye contact with Mallory). You made a point to just look into Michaels eyes, refusing to do what he was doing.. whatever the fuck that truly was.

“How did you know I would be here?” You breathed.

“I knew it was just a matter of time before you’d come, but it also never hurt to charm the hotel staff a bit,” Michael responded swiftly without a second beat, almost as if he anticipated your words. His lips upturned slightly at the edges, in a way that nearly made your stomach sick.

“The hotel staff-?!”

“I have connections everywhere y/n, I thought you knew that,” he sneered.

He brushed past you as you continued to stand in shock. Your mouth slightly falling open as Michael took a few steps into your apartment - looking curiously around, almost as if he knew Mallory was here..

“I did.. I think that’s obvious,” you shot back hurriedly. “But thank you for the apartment again, Michael. I still feel weird taking it but it is nice I’ll admit,” you continued. Hoping to make him turn around to look back at you and hopefully not find Mallory.. Which worked. At least for a few seconds at least.

Michael made direct eye contact with you for a moment, almost as if he wanted to speak but was deliberately choosing not too. Instead he turned around, walking in deeper in the apartment.

Your mouth immediately dropped open - your feet carried yourself forward as you started to feel a bit numb with shock- not knowing even in the slightest how you were going to handle the situation if Mallory didn’t fucking move.

Sure enough..

“You always manage to linger.. don’t you?” Michael spoke.

It took only a couple steps for you to fully realize he wasn’t speaking to you. You only saw his backside as you approached them. Quickly meeting Mallorys gaze as you came into view.. Her brown eyes darker than ever as she peered up at you.

This time it is nearly impossible to distinguish whether she looked in agony from Michaels appearance or yours; since you apparently interrupted them. Her gaze quickly returned back to meet Michaels before you could think anything of it.

“I’m not here to see you, Michael.” Mallory announced. Her tone harsher than what you were expecting what apparent friends would use.. Were they even really friends?

Mallory suddenly stood up while Michael was still standing a few feet in front of her. Making eye contact with Michael for a split second before almost ducking around him before she stood in front of you.. leaving Michael speechless behind her. She quickly hugged you, her arms only embracing you for a split second before leaving. It was obvious she was in a hurry to leave now but.. you weren’t sure exactly why.

“I should get going, you and Michael have a lot to talk about,” she subtly smiled before turning to leave.. not letting you reply or have any sort of reaction to her words.

You stood solemnly as you heard Mallory’s footsteps gradually go farther away, before hearing the door open and close. You watched Michaels back as he refused to turn around.

“How was your nice chat with Mallory?”

“Why are you asking? Am I not allowed to see her or something?” You bit back. Your words possibly twice as venomous as his were.

Michael hastily turned around, looking at you with utter disbelief. His blue eyes looking into yours, as if he was suddenly surprised by your tone and how you were acting - as if his behavior didn’t proceeded yours.

“You need to relax,” he snapped. He approached you until he was right in front of you. “I wasn’t asking because I’m trying to control you, I know that’s what your thinking,” His words fell soft until they were nearly inaudible. “I just wanted to ask what she talked to you about.”

“About us?” You prompted.

“Well what else would she be talking to you about,” he snickered. His words spoken as more of a statement than a question. His laughter quickly dwindled off after he saw how rigid your frame suddenly looked. “Kidding. For the most part.. she said she was going to talk to you, and I figured I should actually speak to you this time rather than her.”

“Are you.. actually trying to trust me, Michael Langdon?” You teased. A smile, as well as laughter escaped from your lips at the mere thought.

Even though the thought was amusing on its own, you still didn’t completely trust him. Even now when he had Mallorys trust (for the most part), you still didn’t doubt that he had a ulterior motive.

Michael finally stepped back, hesitantly breaking eye contact before inaudibly beckoning you to follow him.

“I’m trying, just like how I told you I would,” He hauntingly reminded you.

You followed him silently to the long leather couch that sat by the overly expansive windows. Sitting down next to him in a way that felt almost too casual.. but being casual around Michael and not borderline fearing for your life was something you would have to adjust too.

You noticed how he instantly slipped his shoes off; drawing up his feet on the couch.. his arms and as well the rest of him contained. Away from you.

“So if your trying.. now,” you suggested uncertainly. “Then.. tell me why you came here to talk suddenly again? I mean why not just go through Mallory again like you’ve doing previously?”

“(Y/n), please. Take me seriously and just trust me for once,” His words came out quick and stern as he spoke them. “I was being serious yesterday, as well as all the other times when I told you I wanted to start.. putting effort in and trying.”

You stared at Michael utterly dumbfounded.. Feeling a bit hopeless that you actually felt almost.. touched by his words. That’s if he was actually being serious, anyway.

“What does trying mean to you?” You asked carefully. Your mind naturally went back to Madison.. were they even broken up yet? Was that even something that Michael was willing to do for you, and how was that something you could just ask? “What about-“

“Madison’s fine. She’s fine.. with everything,” he replied hesitantly.

You simply ignored the fact that he seemed to pick up what you were talking about almost immeadietly.. focusing on rather the latter part of the sentence.. that she was okay with everything?

“So she knows? That you’re here?”

“Yeah. She knows but that’s besides the point. Madison isn’t a part of the equation anymore, I don’t want to talk about her,” He spoke as if his words were final and not to be argued with, but his tone wasn’t angry. He was just done.. and you were too.

You wish that wasn’t the case though. Cutting Madison off didn’t sit right with you in the slightest, and it would definitely have to be something that would have to be mended later. That was a given.

Madison and Michaels relationship was far too close for them to suddenly split and remain like that forever - it was temporary, but so is everything really. That shouldn’t phase you but - it still managed too.

“Okay. I’m sorry, I didn’t-“ you started.

“It’s fine. I knew you would ask.. She’s the reason why I’m here actually,” His eyes broke contact and averted down to his hands. “I don’t mean that as in I’m not here to see you but, it was something she said that brought me here.” He continued, his voice almost growing soft now at just the mention of his ex girlfriend.. and now, you felt like you actually were starting to understand his point of view. Not fully but, it was clear that Michael was trying to be more open with you, and this time he wasn’t ‘fake’ drunk.

It took nearly everything in you to not immeadietly retort but just like the night where you were at the party; you tried to fully hear him out since this was apparently one of the few times he was being civil.

“So Madison gave you advice and you actually took it?” You said while laughing softly. Trying to lighten the mood since Michael seemed to be brooding.

Michael didn’t laugh back but instead his gaze flickered up to meet yours for a moment. The corners of his mouth upturning in a shallow smile that only lasted for a few seconds.

“I did because it made sense.” He said, his tone still remaining serious. You noticed how careful he was being with his words.. something that was typical for Michael to do but this time it seemed a bit too deliberate. You wanted to ask what exactly Madison even told him to do but.. that felt wrong. “It was also the right thing to do.. Being close to you is something I should’ve done a while ago, probably immeadietly-“

“But what’s in the past; stays in the past. And since your so adamant about being close to me.. we can always try now,” you cut in.

Michael continued to sit a good distance away from you; you thought it was ironic how he could talk about wanting to get close with you but wouldn’t dare to move any closer. That thought made your pride a little bit too happy.

Right before he could open his mouth to say something; his phone rang. The sound suddenly earsplitting and blaring but Michael didn’t bother to flinch. Instead he stood up and answered his phone.. making sure to nearly trek across the apartment before he said anything into the phone.

You stretched and casually examined him as he talked, you had a feeling who it was on the line..

After how tense things were with Mallory - you knew they probably weren’t going to be on friendly terms anytime soon.. especially in front of you. And judging by how.. oddly relaxed he seemed (yet timid when he caught your gaze and realized you were staring), it had to be one person.

You were about to sink back into the couch and try your best to not speculate what they were talking about, but before you could fully turn - you realized Michael was sauntering towards you.. clearly still on the phone.

Oh fuck.

Before you could ask what was wrong, the look he gave you alone ushered you to silence.

He quickly held the phone away from his ear. A quick glance at the screen confirmed that the call was still active.

“You said you forgive Madison.. right?” He spoke lowly. His words barely audible, more so mouthing the words than actually speaking them.

You looked at him with a expression you’re sure looked as if you were furious but you were really just completely confused. You wanted to ask but.. there was no time if she was on the phone, but knowing what you were about to get yourself into would also be nice to know.

His eyes had since lost the sharpness that had nearly cut you earlier, instead swarming with urgency and a bit of panic.. It had to be Madison. The only person that could ever have that effect on Michael was Madison.

You simply nodded in response. Not trusting yourself to speak quietly outloud but you also didn’t exactly trust your response because it wasn’t exactly truthful, but Michael seemed to be level headed.. for now.

Michael immeadietly turned and held the phone back up to his ear, this time staying in closer proximity and within ear shot. Putting on his shoes as he continued to hold the conversation he was having.

“Okay

...

So when are you coming?

...

Great, see you then. . . Bye.”

If you didn’t just hear the words that you thought you had heard.. you knew under normal circumstances your heart would’ve ached when you realized how Michael hesitated before he said goodbye, most likely catching himself before he said ‘I love you’. Instead though, you felt a gruesome wave of nausea suddenly rise through you.. urging you to shakily stand up and speak without thinking.

“She’s coming to see you?”

Michael barely gave you a second glance as he turned around and started to head for the front door of the apartment.

“Yes. You’ll be seeing her too, don’t worry.” He spoke before he quickly let the door shut behind him.

You continued to stand, utterly speechless.

Part of you wanted to run after him and the other part merely wanted to scream in anger that he had already made fucking plans but instead you felt numb. Numb and calm.

You returned to your bag and unpacked, trying your best to not let your emotions consume you like they previously had too many times.. until you finally broke down and called Mallory.

Taglist: @michaellangdonstanaccount @langdonsexual @jimmason @blakescoven @dark-mei-rose @9layerdevilfoodcake @prophecy-is-inevitable @matildaofoz @beautyiswithinchaos @frenchlangdon @king-with-no-crovvn @melodylangdon @littledemondani @langdons-pinkyring @celestialrequiem @sojournmichael @mindlesschicca

Let me know if u would like to be added or removed to the taglist!!

#michael x reader #Michael Langdon x reader #michael langdon fanfic #michael langdon fanfiction #Michael Langdon #my fic #Imminient Annihilation #hopefully y’all like this and it’s not all over the place djdjd #about to post to ao3 like always #ALSO thank u for the 2k hits on ao3!! 🥺💖#also side note - Jennifer’s body was amazing and now I wanna write something related 😭

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words-for-holland · 4 years

Text

Quarantine Series: Secret Cuts & Kisses

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Y/N gets hurt...again but this time she tries to keep it on the down low from Tom.

A/N: The Songs in Our Life Part 1 comes out tomorrow. If you want to be in a taglist for TSOL or Quarantine Series send an ask or message!

Read TSOL -> (X)

There are three types of people in this world. People that are clumsy, people that are accident prone, and then there’s Y/N, who happens to be all of the above and more.

“Man, Im starving.” Y/N stated out loud as she made her way down the kitchen. She had just finished up an hour long meeting for work, when her stomach decided it was time for a break. Harry was also sitting down at the kitchen, reviewing the script he and Tom were working so hard on creating. He looked up to see Y/N grab an avocado, onions, tomatoes, and limes. It was then that he knew exactly what she was making, and could only ask the most appropiate question.

“Can you make me some guac too?” Harry asked with a sheepish smile.

Y/N laughed out loud as she went to grab more in order to make enough for the both of them. “Why did I have a feeling you were gonna ask that?”, she questioned herself, shaking her head.

“Hey, its not my fault! You make the best kind. Better than Sam’s and that says a lot.” Harry defended.

“Whatever you say Harry.” She smiled as she focused on cutting the onions and tomatoes. Y/N then opened up and deseeded the first avocado with no problem. Sadly, the same couldnt have been said for second one. She had cupped the avocado half firmly in her hand , positioning the knife to make sure it hit the seed when she whacked it. Unfortunately, Y/N didnt realize how slippery the fruit was, when she whacked it. The blade went thru a part of the seed but slipped on to her hand. She could feel and see the cut forming on the palm of her hand and side of her thumb.

Y/N and Harry’s eyes widened at the trauma. Dont freak out! Dont freak out! Dont freak out! Y/N repeated over and over again as she worked quickly to run her injured hand under cold water. “I’ll go get Tom!” Harry yelled, as he was about to run after his older brother for help.”Tom! To—”

Y/N used her non-injured hand to grab Harry and stop him from panicking and calling Tom. “Shhh! Its fine! Im gonna be fine! Tom does not need to know about this.” She whispered yelled to him.

“Y/N! You just butchered your hand like it was a scene from Scream! You have to tell him!” Harry tried to convince you, but he forgot what she was like in situations like this.

“C’mon Harry. Think about it for a second. You know how Tom gets when I get hurt. He gets moody and pissed, like a mama bear. Its two cuts theyll heal.” Y/N hated telling anyone if she was hurt or sick. Seeing her family and friends worry about her, hurt her more than when she gets injured herself. Her motto was that she can always fix it and pretend like it didnt happen at all. “Just please please please dont say anything to him. Look they dont even need stiches.” She showed Harry her injured hand which still continued to drip blood down slowly.

Harry hated keeping secrets, but Y/N always had a way of persuading people. “Fine.” He grumbled. “But if Tom finds out he’s going to lose it with the both of us, me especially.”

“Who’s gonna lose what now?” Tom asked coming in with the most impeccable timing. Y/N and Harry froze as she slowly tried to throw away all the bloody paper towels she used

“Nothing!” The two yelled out.

Tom was indeed confused looking at the both of them, something was up and he was going to get to the bottom of it. “Nothing? Are you two sure about that?” He saw Y/N leaning over the sink when he saw paper towels with a red hue on them. It a moment to click until he put two and two together. His eyes widen at the realization, and rushed towards the sink, seeing his assumptions were correct.

“Damn it Y/N, what the bloody hell did you do to yourself!” Tom yelled, worry written all over his face. He picked up her injured hand carefully as he inspected the wounds.

“Relax Tom, it was an accident. The cuts are not that deep.” She stated, rolling her eyes.

“Everything with you is an accident.” He muttered. “I cant believe both of you were about to hide this from me.” Tom pointed at Harry, who now shows signs of fear as he raised his hands up in defeat. “And you, I’ll deal with you later.”

“Listen man, she was the one asking me to not say anything and I told her it was a bad idea.” Harry defended himself as he quickly left the room.

“Come here, let’s see if we can bandage them up.” Tom grabbed Y/N’s non-injured hand as he led her to their shared bedroom. He quickly grabbed the first aid kit from the bathroom and started to clean up her wounds. “I hope you know Im still mad at you for keeping this away from me.” He said to her, eyes focusing on her cuts.

“Tom, Im sorry but this was what I was trying to avoid. Anytime I get hurt, you act like this. I just didnt want to see you upset or worry over nothing.” She winced as Tom rubbed her wounds with an alcohol pad.

“Sorry.” He muttered. “Of course Im gonna worry. It’s my job to worry about you. I want to be the person to take care of you when youre sick or injured, but I cant do that if you wont tell me. God, if anything happens to you...I —” Tom shook his head to get rid of the terrible thought.

“Hey” Y/N whispered. Tom looked up into her eyes, as she held his face with her uninjured hand. “Im okay. Im always going to be okay. No matter how many times I fall, bruise, bleed, whatever. You’re not the only tough guy around here.” She leaned in kiss his cheek, as Tom went back to fixing up her cuts.

“Does it hurt?” He asked rubbing small cricled on the back of her hand, after bandaging her hand.

Y/N shook her head. “Not really, just a little bit.” Tom picked up her hand, leaving a long soft and gently kiss on each band-aid covered cut.

“How about now?” He looked up, smiling.

“Better. Thank you for taking care of me.”

“Of course thats what superhero boyfriends are for right?” Tom chuckled as he stood up to kiss the top of Y/N’s head. He was about to put the first aid kit away until she stopped him, pulling the back of his shirt.

“Actually...I think my face is hurting a bit. Can you help me, Spiderman?” She smirked.

“Oh? Is it now? What happend to being a tough girl that can take care of herself?” He challenges, kneeling back down to her.

“Well this happens to be something only a hero can fix.”

“Where on the face does it hurt, pretty girl?” Tom question as the two continued to lean towards each other.

“The forehead.” She stated. “Think it might need another kiss.”

Tom smiled as he placed a soft kiss to where she pointed. “Better?” He asked.

“Kinda. The nose is hurting a bit now.” She pointed to the tip of her nose, where Tom place another soft kiss. He didnt waste any other minute, and kissed her the place where he wanted to kiss her the most. Tom pressed his lips against Y/N’s as her hand instinctly wrapped around his neck. She returned the kiss with the same amount of passion, and they stayed in this moment for what seemed like forever, only breaking the kiss when they needed to breathe.

“I dont know Tom, with the way things are going...I might have to get hurt more often.” Y/N joked, as she tried to catch her breath.

“How about...you try to stay out of trouble and Ill give you an even better time than this?” Tom compromised, laughing as his hands slipped under her shirt and gently caressed her sides. He looked her up and down, showing off that smoulder that always made Y/N weak in the knees.

“Better put me in a human bubble then.”

#tom holland #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #peter parker

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thekillerssluts · 3 years

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My Relationship to Performance Has Changed

A great rock-and-roll show means openness, confrontation, and a kind of danger, and those ideas right now feel too heavy to lift.

Last October, before the second pandemic wave took off in New York City, I had one last band practice in my backyard in South Brooklyn. Five of us were working on songs from my new solo record. Normally we’d play in the basement, but it’s pretty low-ceilinged, and we’d read Zeynep Tufekci’s recent Atlantic article on viral spread, so we were all hyper-focused on air circulation. My bandmate Sara had contracted COVID-19—and recovered—in March, but the rest of us had no immunity. Besides, we suspected that we were in for a long winter and might as well hang out outdoors.

It was warm in the sun. After hauling the drums, keyboards, keyboard stands, guitars, and amps outside and plugging everything in, I hadn’t wanted to bother setting up microphones, so we had to play softly to hear ourselves harmonize. When we paused for lunch, someone leaned out of a fourth-story window in the apartment building next door and yelled: “Are you done or are you just taking a break? I have things to do, but I really miss live music!” “Me too, man!” I called back. “Should be just a break.”

Six months and a difficult winter later, the break is ending. I’m seeing more and more Instagram posts for shows that aren’t just wishful thinking. Low-capacity indoor shows are popping up in New York. Outdoor—maybe even full-capacity indoor—concerts are coming this summer. Am I ready to play? Ask me every other day and the answer changes. I’m torn. I’m desperate for sound engineers to get back behind the board and bartenders to start earning tips. I want venues to thrive again, both as places for art in neighborhoods and for the sake of the network that keeps music culture alive in America. I want my booking agent to feel excited again; he loves music so much. And I want musicians to make a living. So many people have been so screwed by the past year. I guess I just want everyone to get paid.

But the actual performance; the rebuilding of the sonic cathedral, as Dave Grohl wrote last spring; communally reaching for rock-and-roll transcendance? I’m not there yet. I’m not concerned that I’ll get sick. I received my second vaccine shot at the end of March and am ready to high-five strangers on the subway. My hesitance has an element of crowd-shyness, which we’ll all get over. But in my own performance, I don’t know how to meet this moment. A great rock-and-roll show means openness, confrontation, and a kind of danger, and those ideas right now feel too heavy to lift.

I used to think of performance in purely aesthetic terms. In the movie La Strada, a clown wearing angel wings does a high-wire act across a crowded piazza. For his finale, he brings out a table on the wire and, while balancing, tries to sit and eat a full plate of spaghetti. The heroine of the movie watches him with an almost religious ecstasy. When I first started performing, I strove for transcendence and stupidity, high concept and low art. My focus was on keeping myself in the air.

When my band Arcade Fire was playing mostly to people who hadn’t heard us before, we felt that the best way to get them to open up was to blow the windows and doors out. At an early show in Lawrence, Kansas, my brother, Win, bashed Styrofoam tiles out of the venue’s ceiling with his mic stand. We pushed as hard for an audience of six people (two of them my parents) upstairs at AS220 in Providence, Rhode Island, as we did in front of tens of thousands in the desert at our first Coachella show (during which I accidentally cut Win’s guitar cable in half by repeatedly smashing a cymbal into the ground).

At a certain point, as people got to know our music, my relationship to performance changed. The energy from the crowd was greater than anything coming from the giant speaker stacks. The audience wasn’t a challenge to overcome, or an opponent to conquer. We became a team. Not in an abstract, lovey way but how a sports team operates—pushing one another to do better, sometimes failing, sometimes frustrating one another, sometimes just joking around.The high-wire act of live performance—Will the music come together?—was still there. I’ve even sometimes tried to make the metaphor real, climbing arena scaffolding with a drumstick in my teeth and a drum strapped over my shoulder to play 30 feet in the air. Some of our crew members hate it—“Will! You have children now!”—but climbing up there doesn’t actually feel that dangerous, and a little nervousness is good. I’m reaching for primate simplicity and catharsis: The crowd needs tension to experience release.But now I have no desire to make tension. I want people to feel safe and comfortable, and I wonder whether creating a feeling of danger and openness is antithetical to that. I know that cultivating a perception of safety and actually making people safe are different. On tour, in a big venue, every night our management and local security have a briefing. It’s partly to set a vibe—People are here for music. Everybody be chill. If some teenager sneaks into a closer section, please let them. But the briefing is also serious—where the medics are located, what the escape routes are. Most of the time, these safety measures are invisible. I worry that post-pandemic precautions, as welcome and necessary as they are, will be depressingly visible. Some elements, such as temperature checks, will be inane. Some, such as requiring vaccination, will be important. Regardless, they will also set a tone—not You are entering a place for music, but You are entering a secure location. Dancing is hard when you’re looking at your feet; singing is hard when you’re thinking about everybody else’s breath. I bet the crowd could get over this. I’m not confident I could. With limited capacities and tight procedures, I worry that the stage will feel like the VIP section of the VIP room at a members-only club. Sterile, lonely, all of us chillingly aware that we are part of a ticketed event.

I have another concern that’s hard to shake. After this pandemic year, I’m more aware of the responsibility I have not only to the people who buy tickets, but to the driver making deliveries to the show and to the family of the woman working arena concessions, people who really don’t care about what I’m doing onstage. Vaccination numbers will grow, and the pandemic will end, God willing. I’m not worried about the spread of the coronavirus in particular. But these links of responsibility remain. The analytical part of my brain turns off when touring starts. Before scrambling back to normalcy, I want to make sure that this sense of connection becomes embedded in how I think. I would really love to just be a musician—but I’m also an employer and a player in an industry that has chewed up and spit out plenty of people, especially in this past year.

My hesitations are all about shows, though, not music. Over the past year, I’ve rarely played music with others—a few practices and filmed performances; work on the new Arcade Fire record in November; a handful of Zooms with bandmates to help a school’s PTA fundraiser or support a candidate in the city-comptroller race. But in all of those instances, I’ve experienced an ease, a rightness to the communication—not through the screen with whoever was listening, necessarily, but the people I was playing with. That connection felt restorative, like having a night of deep sleep that repairs parts of yourself you don’t know how to access.

I know people are ready for live music, ready to forget themselves in a wash of sound, ready to loudly talk with their friends over the song they don’t like that much. And so, for heaven’s sake, go to Neumos in Seattle when shows come back. Go to the Hideout in Chicago. See your favorite band, or somebody new. Plenty of artists don’t share my nervousness. I don’t want to add worry to the world; I’m just figuring out my new relationship to performance.

The magnolias are out in New York, and some of the apple trees are blossoming. Temperatures are creeping past 60. The vaccines keep rolling out. The future seems more possible. If I miss an emotion from live shows, it’s not any moment of transcendence. I miss the time just after, when, dazed and excited, you still feel the reach of some universal gesture, but the only thing concrete is the people around you.

https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2021/04/world-changed-what-makes-live-show-successful-didnt-arcade-fire/618625/

#Arcade Fire #will butler

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officialleotolstoy · 3 years

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Oh Dolokhov/Hélène Brainrot We’re Really In It Now, aka Dolokhov/Hélène playlist annotations!

I stole several songs from a playlist my friends have and I’m not gonna put those on this list, I won’t pretend I came up with those

The ship playlists (since they aren’t for canon couples) are very much based on my headcanons. We don’t get to see them interact literally ever so I’ve just extrapolated what I can. Several of these songs are at least alluding to sex, I don’t really think they actually slept together for various reasons I can enumerate if someone asks, but it’s more about the vibes of the song.

Casual Affair - Panic! At The Disco

It’s literally in the title. Bestie how much more explanation do you need? I don’t even like this song but it’s got the right energy

Those Nights - Bastille

“Aren’t we all just looking for a little bit of hope these days? Looking for somebody you can wake up with?”

Being drawn to each other because of mutual loneliness is a Thing in my interpretation of their relationship, and this hits the nail on the head.

But It’s Better If You Do - Panic! At The Disco

“Praying for love and paying in naïveté”

Again, mutual loneliness and desperation for anything resembling love. Also the “isn’t this exactly where you like me” bit fits because they won’t admit to liking each other outside of their weird intimate moments.

Hurricane - Panic! At The Disco

“Drop our anchors in a storm”

The circumstances of their lives arent super fun at the moment so they find refuge in each other but in a very weird kind of unhealthy way! “We are a hurricane” sort of alludes to knowing that you’re causing problems/your relationship isn’t great.

Almost (Sweet Music) - Hozier

“I’m almost me again, she’s almost you”

It’s about not really being In Love but kind of convincing yourself you are because it makes you feel better in the circumstances. I don’t think either of them were fully into their relationship for various reasons. Not as in they didn’t want the other, more that they were both too aware it would never work for long.

Hall & Oates - Satchmode

“I want to be in love again, with you”

This one’s about wanting the idea of love and companionship more than you actually like the other person, which I feel like kind of fits. This song is framed as one person in love with the other and one hesitating, but i think this works for both of them to hesitate.

Feel Something - Jaymes Young

“Touch me, someone, I’m too young to feel so numb”

The I have tried like six times and I can’t word why I think this song works. I don’t even like it, I skip it every time, but I think it’s got something to do with loneliness and desperation for love driving them to look for it in places they wouldn’t normally? Who knows. Send me an ask if u do.

Another Place - Bastille

“Don’t make promises to me that you’re gonna break”

They could never actually be together for SO many reasons and I think they’re both pretty aware of that. They have no desire to pretend that their relationship is anything other than what it is (“we only ever wanted one thing from this”).

When You Were Young - The Killers

“You sit there in your heartache, waiting on some beautiful boy to save you”

I do not think Hélène expected Dolokhkov to save her from anything except maybe monotony and loneliness, but this song slaps and if I can stretch the lyrics to work, I will

broken - lovelytheband

“I could be lonely with you”

Almost every song on here (including this one) is just. We’re messed up and I know we won’t really find love in each other but we might find solace for a while and be less lonely so uhhhhh wanna kiss me or what

Bleed Magic - I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

“You stand up, stand up, before I drag you down”

They are NOT good for each other! Toxic relationships uwu

Sweater Weather - The Neighbourhood

I believe in bi4bi Hélène/Dolokhov

Enemy Fire - Bea Miller

“Sweet words from a serpent’s tongue”

This song is kinda complicated and parts of it don’t fit but the energy of “everything sucks including you but at least we can hide from the suckiness together” is sorta there. Originally I just added it for the soldier vibes because I was testing out songs but I realized i can fit some of the lyrics so on the playlist it goes

Angel of the Small Death and the Codeine Scene - Hozier

“Her sweetened breath and her tongue so mean”

They are horrible and cold to each other as a love language. This song is essentially just “Wow my evil scary gf is so hot” and you’re right Fyodor. She is.

Shut Up and Dance - WALK THE MOON

I won’t lie this one’s mostly a joke, I just think the vibes of telling someone to shut up as (maybe because) you’re falling in love with them is Dolokhov/Hélène energy. Ignore all the parts about wanting to be with her forever and her being his destiny that is not why I added it.

Lone Ranger - Rachel Platten

“I’m just gonna leave, ‘cause baby I’m a lone ranger”

I do not think Dolokhov was intending to stay with her forever at all. Very rude of him. However, she probably also knew it wouldn’t last forever, she’s not stupid.

House of Memories - Panic! At The Disco

“Promise me a place in your house of memories”

This is very much post-duel, their relationship has fizzled out but it was pretty important (do I mean emotionally or to the plot? I’ll never tell) and deserves to be remembered.

American Beauty/American Psycho - Fall Out Boy

“I’m the best worst thing that hasn’t happened to you yet”

SO MANY of these lyrics are so good for them like. Hélène’s beautiful Dolokhov’s a psycho... “you take the full truth and you pour some out” can you imagine them being open and honest with each other? Yeah, me neither. “We were pity sex” They were just sad and lonely! That was what allowed anything to happen at all in my head (not sex but bear with me it’s not my fault those are the lyrics). “All those dirty thoughts of me, they were never yours to keep” because Hélène is married to someone else, they really have no right to think of each other that way.

Sk8er Boi - Avril Lavigne

“He wasn’t good enough for her”

UNIRONICALLY THIS SONG. Hélène’s complaints about Dolokhov staying with them are just the quoted lyric. “They had a problem with his baggy clothes” yeah Dolokhov’s not as rich and bougie and the rest of them and he’s certainly rough around the edges. And then the skater boy ending with a successful music career vs Dolokhov ending with a successful military career and a great reputation and both the women in the songs having sad endings...I’m not wrong.

Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet - Fall Out Boy

“Does your husband know the way that the sunshine gleams from your wedding band?”

The affair vibes. The AFFAIR VIBES. And the concept of “I will never end up like him [the husband]/ behind my back I already am” in reference to using Hélène and deciding he hates her right after deciding she’s hot...okay! I see you kinning Pierre, Dolokhov. You ARE being just like her husband :/

You Give Love A Bad Name - Bon Jovi

“Shot through the heart and you’re to blame”

This is just Dolokhov’s massive I Hate Women monologue condensed. Stop blaming beautiful women for YOUR attraction to them maybe 🔫

Death Valley - Fall Out Boy

“Don’t take love off the table yet”

This is not a table sex joke this is not a table sex joke this is not a table sex joke this is n-

I didnt add it for that reason it was about a vibe but then. I realized. Now the original reason doesn’t even matter.

Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner - Fall Out Boy

“I’ll be your best kept secret and your biggest mistake”

Tell me the quoted lyric does not SCREAM Hélène/Dolokhov. You can’t. Also “I’ll weigh you down I’ll watch you choke/You look so good in blue” really captures hatred as a love language.

This is Love - Air Traffic Controller

Ok I stole this from my friends’ playlist but I did want to explain it because it’s not JUST Dolokhov and Hélène in my mind. The whole jealous fool second verse gives me Pierre around the duel energy as well

Bad Boy - Cascada

“Be my weekend lover but don’t be my friend”

Bernie Sanders voice I am once again asking you to hear me out about the unironic meme songs on my War and Peace character playlists. It’s got the refusal to admit that she actually likes hanging out with him down. The line “after some time you just pushed me aside” referring to Dolokhov teasing Pierre about their affair because he got bored. “I dont need you in my life again”...YEAH I’m fairly sure they dont interact in canon again after that.

Hayloft - Mother Mother

“My daddy’s got a gun”

This song started playing on accident once when I was listening to this playlist and I was like huh. It fits though. The gun thing is twofold: 1) Though he is not her father, Pierre does have a gun in the duel and 2) I think Vassily would happily shoot Dolokhov for his relationships with Vassily’s kids. It’s also just the general forbidden love vibes mixed with the violence vibes.

affection - BETWEEN FRIENDS

“I’m looking for affection in all the wrong places and we’ll keep falling on each other to fill the empty spaces”

Have I been clear enough about my thesis that their relationship is based in mutual loneliness? Also, I like the acknowledgment that this is in fact the wrong place. I think they’re both very aware of that.

Walk Away - Franz Ferdinand

“Yes I’m cold but not as cold as you are”

This song is for them post-duel. Especially the “I cannot stand to see those eyes as apologies may rise/I must be strong, stay an unbeliever” because 1) I hear the word eyes, I think of Dolokhov and 2) I think she’s too smart to believe any apology he would give her, she knows he doesn’t really mean it. The song kinda reads as someone trying to convince themselves they’re happy that the relationship is over, which I think is definitely what happens for both of them.

Van Horn - Saint Motel

“Tell me do you hate me? Or do you wanna date me?”

Obsessed with the dynamic of “I like you but that’s embarrassing for both of us I’m gonna act like I hate you instead”

#war and peace #helene kuragina #fedya dolokhov #my post #w&p playlists #helenkhov #is that their ship name??? idk #someone tell me what it is ill owe u my life

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corvidshipping · 3 years

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modern au red/milo dump while i try to get myself together to answer asks nd work on ATJ:

(tw for alcohol mentions near the end, also this is an EXTREMELY long post, its so long that even after i split it into categorized sections each section could be its own post)

CLOTHING

milo absolutely has no sense of fashion. i feel like this is basically canon - for the styles at the time, he dresses fairly basic, mostly focused on looking put together for his job (definitely dresses aimed more towards how he would like to be treated by his peers, despite his actual position - then again our best example outside of the expedition is when he's about to deliver what he considers the most important presentation of his life, so who knows, maybe he usually dresses like a slob). aside from that his main concern seems like practicality and comfort. his wardrobe is dominated by earth tones - beiges and greens set with white and greys. all of that taken into account, i can see him dressing like this in a more modern era:

basically- a lot of cardigans, usually collared shirts or comfortable turtlenecks (since he does still occupy a research position at the smithsonian, even if only in title), big ol' coats, khakis and chinos and slightly stiff dress pants complete with ironed creases. i can see him wearing similar clothes outside work, just more comfortable - jeans and knitted shirts, henleys, more turtlenecks, and comfy cardigans over short sleeved shirts. i dont really see him wearing a lot of prints, i think he'd veer more towards solid clothes in lighter colors, but maybe he has a few. hes definitely the kind of guy to think of wearing the single graphic tee he owns as "bold and wild".

im very married to the idea of him wearing converse though. i cant explain it. milo in converse keeps me going in this world

hes kind of broke so i think maybe he got the converse secondhand maybe? or a gift of some kind. aside from the converse i can see him wearing a lot of oxfords and maybe wingtips

i want to see him in a hawaiian shirt so bad. i am losing it at this thought. he buttons it all the way up to his neck like someones awkward dad. milo wears a hawaiian shirt to "let loose". he wears it with like, khakis. or knee length jorts AHHHHDJHDSGJHDSJGh

a tie??? does he wear his hawaiian shirt with a tie???? does he think it makes it look cooler?????????? i am sobbing

red is the COMPLETE opposite. in the canon 1914 setting, red is already very rebellious for an AFAB person of their era- theyre openly a suffragette, they frequently refuse to wear skirts even in public and dress in mens clothes even before they were openly nonbinary, despite not being accepted into the male-dominated research fields and colleges they continue to educate themself with or without help, they purposely aim for an "unfeminine" silhouette when they dress, refuse to wear corsets, etc. (spoiler alert- there's a clear reason they get on so well with audrey in ATJ)

theyre also easily mistaken by people that didnt know them prior to their transition for being just a very small/young cis man- even though they canonically have a very soft "traditionally feminine" face

so basically, in any era theyre set into, red is always gonna aim to be ahead of the curve- both in their personal beliefs and practices and in their fashion. theyre also very androgynous in their clothes, although they tend to aim a bit more masculine (thats partially due to the era though, and having been forced into skirts exclusively for their entire life- i think in a modern setting where its more acceptable for AFABs to dress and act in a less hyperfeminine way, theyd be more okay with a fluidity in their gender presentation).

all that taken into account, i can see them dressing like this:

lots of baggy clothes, especially baggy jackets and shirts. they like loose fitting high waisted pants like JNCO jeans, cargo pants, etc but they arent averse to pencil legs. they rarely ever wear skinny jeans or drainpipes though. messy hair is a lifestyle for them- their haircut is definitely home-done

you know how in BICSTLY they used to have really long hair before they cut it? in a modern au i can see them impulsively doing the cut at like 3am and waking milo up at his door cause they screwed it up and he ends up having to help fix it (even though hes literally no better at cutting hair than them. worse even)

definitely have an undercut bob- bob on top, shaven on the bottom layer. they might end up growing their hair into a mullet at some point if they get bored. probably dyes their hair all the time out of boredom and then regrets it later and has to use dye remover.

lots of ripped tights and fishnets, leggings with big loose crop tops, big hoodies, safety pin jewelry and homemade jewelry. maybe some sticknpokes.

all that said, they still know how to dress in a professional situation. since its a modern au theres really nothing holding them back from the education and career they canonically want but cant get in the 1910s, so i imagine they would work at the smithsonian as well, maybe their father helped them get the job? potentially in that case they might be his assistant- after all, he trusts their opinion on artifacts more than anyone else's.

at work you can still very much see the punk/skater/grunge/goth style but its more understated- turtlenecks, high waisted and looser dress pants, lots of black, slightly unbuttoned collared shirts with a loose overcoat and no tie

since i elaborated on milos shoe taste i may as well elaborate on red's: they definitely wear converse as well, probably newer than milo's since their father is fairly wealthy and they can afford it. they also have a doc martens collection. they have a pair of demonias but they never wear them and milo is really the only person to even know they own them, let alone see them in them. they really dont like to wear heels much, but they own a few just to play around with. they have a bad habit of wearing any laced shoes untied, but they never trip over the laces. they also use lace code- their most-worn Docs have purple laces on the right foot and yellow on the left. some of their Docs have (reclaimed) pink laces.

has an extensive pin collection including feminism pins, anti-racism pins, punk-related pins, skater-related pins, and pop culture pins (80s music, modern music, old movies, etc)

MUSIC TASTE

milo's into a lot of older music- stuff from the 50s is his favorite. really into jazz and ballroom style stuff. his favorite band is queen, i think- he likes the old-fashioned sound, the jazz-chamber-ballroom influences, the diversity of their lyrics, and the complexity between the guitar riffs, the basslines, and freddie's vocal runs as well as the vocal harmonies.

sometimes he hums good old fashioned lover boy to red and they two-step in the living room in their pajamas :pleading:

also very into rush. yes, he is a rush guy :pensive:.

also listens to a surprising amount of lo-fi? he really likes stuff that remixes older music with hip hop and lofi elements, like earl grey. nearly exclusively into instrumental stuff but also very into louie zong. he listens to it while he works a lot.

knows a lotttt of foreign artists, especially niche ones. fuckin LOVES casiopea

red's spotify is a goddamn mess. everything from 2000s emo, to classic 70s punk, to post-punk and new wave, to 90s pop, to rap. they cant be easily classified at all

their favorite bands are oingo boingo, prince, queen (they listen to a lot of their harder-rock music, but milo knows theyre into the ballads too. theyll never tell anyone else though), doja cat, lil nas, fall out boy, and billie eilish.

red recites the intro monologue to lets go crazy very seriously to make milo laugh, sometimes. they get very into it with their facial expressions. sometimes it devolves into a full air guitar/keyboard/drum and wild dancing session. milo does not know how to participate in this but he loves watching them have fun with it. sometimes they pull him off the couch to make him dance with them, though

they are a huge sucker for dark pop, vaporwave, retrowave, EDM, hip hop, emo, punk... etc etc. anything that combines any two or more of those genres in an original or interesting way gets their attention right away

there's a lot of sharing between the two of them- even though their music tastes are so different, they like a lot of the others taste, and theyre always up to listen to whatever their partner is playing.

red is a huge softie, and milo has found them more than once listening to or humming something he was playing for them the other day because it reminded them of him

speaking of which- in the 1914 canon, red can play piano. i think that carries over to a modern au, where they could play piano and by extension keyboard. i like to think they experiment with a lot of instruments but i doubt they ever really mastered any others. maybe theyre okay at drums or bass?

they learned to play and sing teo torriatte for milo, as a surprise. when they first performed it for them, they had everything set up for when he got home from work- the lights were dimmed, they had candles lit around the keyboard, they draped stuff in cloth to make it look pretty, they scattered flower petals around. when milo walked in and saw it all, he almost proposed then and there- the only thing that stopped him was that he would kick himself for the rest of his life if he did that without a ring.

HOBBIES/ACTIVITIES

milo is still an avid chess player in this, but i like to think hes in some kind of groupchat or text or discord server for it. he doesnt necessarily consider any of the others in the chat close friends, but he does know them all by name

he tries to get red into chess but they never really get it

he tells them all about the stuff that goes down in the games and they just. do not understand. but they love listening to him get excited about it anyway

"red you're not gonna BELIEVE this, eddie played an italian game on star today! i thought for sure she would see through it since everyone knows it but she slipped and he beat her in like, 13 moves! i wouldnt have believed it if i hadnt been there!"

"yes sweetie please tell me more" (barely disguised pained expression)

red is a skater and a regular at the skate park by the smithsonian

most regulars there know them by name, they can spot a newbie a mile away

they have a sticker of a broken tv with a skull inside of it on the underside of their board, its become recognized as a symbol of them unofficially

since theyre so regular and have been going there a lot longer than most of the other skaters that frequent the place, a lot of what they say is kind of just accepted as the rules

they have a bad habit of lecturing new kids who show up without knee/elbow pads or helmets at the very least. all the other skaters enforce it too. kids dont end up showing up without protective gear very often after their first visit

they brought a first aid kid and left it there and everyone has kept it stocked pretty well without them having to have much input. its kind of just a communal first aid kit

they once drew the broken tv symbol on the inside of a half-pipe and everyone started calling it red's ramp after that

they also started calling the bowl at the center of the park the Soup Bowl and now thats just accepted as the name. some of the newer kids genuinely thought that it was called that by the park and were shocked when they found out it was just a random nickname red gave it one day

theyve brought milo a few times but hes extremely awkward on his feet and could never really get his balance on a skateboard, and quite frankly red is afraid of what might happen if he tried even a low ramp, so he usually just sits at the rim of the bowl while red skates around

everyone knew he was their boyfriend before they even met him. a few of the regulars called him by name right away. one of them was certain red had brought him before.

but no

they just talk so fuckin much about him that its like they already know him

aside from skateboarding, red is pretty good on rollerskates/blades

they tried to take milo to a roller rink once but it was a disaster and they ended up going home, changing into pajamas, ordering chinese food, and marathoning movies till they fell asleep on the couch together. so not a total loss

theyre both very into movies. red is deep into horror and milo likes indie/art movies and just Cannot handle horror at all, but they both agree on old movies, from the 80s and 90s to like the 30s.

red has shown milo some of the classic horror movies and the niche old ones (from like the 40s) since theyre not difficult to stomach

every so often when red brings up wanting to see a horror movie milo is like "aw babe we can watch that tonight i promise it wont be bad" and he genuinely thinks he can handle it this time

he cant

he never can

it is always a lie

red ends up holding him every time and talking him to sleep, but it thankfully never causes like a major panic attack or anything like that

they love going to museums together, of all kinds. they love art museums. they also go to aquariums and aviaries

sometimes they like to go to other history museums and criticise the veracity or accuracy of exhibits/translations, all in good fun of course. theyre never actually being mean about it

SIDENOTES/UNCATEGORIZED

they both used to work at starbucks, when they were younger and before they worked at the smithsonian. they worked at separate stores 2 blocks from each other.

milo cant stand soda or carbonated drinks, red can and will chug a java monster in order to survive a long workday if they must. milo is constantly concerned for their health and wellbeing

they r both lightweights when it comes to drinking. they can split a six pack and both be falling-over drunk by the end of the night.

given the changes in beauty standards people DEFINITELY think milo is more attractive than they would in 1914. cmon. hes a lil twinky nerd. you think people wont eat that up?

he never really catches onto the flirting much though

did u think i would forget ki/da and the others? youd be wrong.

i simultaneously like the idea of something similar to the movie happening, but also just like... ki/da just being a regular person living on the surface. in either case they r all friends still

in the case of ki/da just being a regular person on the surface- i like the idea of atl/antis just being A Place in this au, maybe its a bit of a closed off country though? like, not many foreigners live there and to get there you basically need to be there as a diplomat or a scholar

maybe ki/da visits DC as a diplomat? she is a princess, after all

red meets audrey online cause they both yell at the same misogynistic asshole on twitter

they exchange discord names in the replies of the tweet and tell the guy not to interrupt them while theyre talking in his replies

i like to think red and milo are selected to go on an academic visit to atl/antis (to learn about the culture, with permission of the king), and audrey ends up as the mechanic on the ship during the visit and theyre like (spiderman pointing meme) at each other

red and audrey have so many inside jokes that they basically speak a different language. milo gets some of the terms from context and pop culture (they use "so very" in real life- as in "wow, that shirt is so very.") but he is hopeless to learn all of it

one of their inside jokes is any variation of "milo hot girl summer" and they REFUSE to explain it to him no matter how much he begs

milo wears that iconique tank top on the ship and they say it literally any time he bends over, picks anything up, reaches for anything, moves, BREATHES. he is bewildered and at this point concerned

(in truth, the joke came from red taking a really blurry picture of him in a short sleeve shirt where he looked pretty cute and captioned it "milo's having a hot girl summer rn" and they just could not stop repeating it once audrey met him IRL)

they have a minecraft world. i do like to believe that every so often vinny finds a way in- theyre never sure how- and griefs the shit out of them by blowing up EVERY. monument.

this post is getting long bc im enraptured by the idea of an atl/antis modern au so im cutting it off here but expect WAY MORE later

#paper_heart.txt #s: i didn't say it's the smart thing. but it is the right thing #alcohol ment tw

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sillyteecup · 4 years

Text

Sunflower

Scott McCall x black!reader

Warnings:

Mentions of death

Death

Literally one mention of sex

And my bad writing. Enjoy❤

Sunflower

My Eyes

Want you more than a melody

Let me inside

Wish I could get to know you

Scott's breakup with Allison had been tough and he had no plans to move on anytime soon. He found himself intrigued with the new dark chestnut skinned girl with the rich afro tied up into two huge puffs with sunflowers in them. She wore a short sleeved, lemon and white stripped button up shirt with a lemon rouched tank, long paperbag jeans with yellow sunflowers on the left pantleg, silver framed reading glasses and lemon and white custom Nikes. Scott approached her and sat across from her with the intention of being friends with her. For a second he watched in adoration as she smiled at the whatever she had just written before clearing his throat to catch her attention.

Sunflowers

Sometimes

Keep it sweet in your memory

I was just tongue tied

She looked up him, her eyes questioned Scott and he knew what they wanted to know. He would've answered much quicker if he didn't get lost in the hazel orbs that gazed at him at that moment. "Uhh..." she said snapping him out of his thoughts. "Oh uhm my name is Scott. McCall, captain of the lacrosse team," he mumbled. "Okay. Can I help you Scott McCall, captain of the lacrosse team?" she asked with an inquisitive eyebrow raised. "Uhm I noticed that I haven't seen you before and a friend of mine told me that you're new, so uhm you-uh wanna be uhm friends?" Scott mentally facepalmed himself for stumbling over his words so hard. 'Nice going McCall, she probably thinks you're a dork now,' he chastised himself. She giggled softly and Scott swore he had never heard anything as beautiful in his life. "Name's Y/N. Sure. We can be friends." He let out a sigh of relief and chuckled before diving into conversation with her.

And I dont wanna make you feel bad

But I've been trying hard not to talk to you

My sunflower (sunflower)

He introduced her to his pa-friends and they loved her instantly. Well Stiles was a little wary at first but he grew to like her too. She and Scott had a lot in common and became really close, hell she was giving Stiles a run for his money in the best friend department. Her favourite thing in the world was sunflowers. His favourite thing in the world was her. Scott always saw her as soft and fragile and he found himself falling for her, so he kept her away from all the supernatural drama by not telling her at all. He felt bad for keeping such a huge secret from her but he also felt better because he was protecting her. Little did he know that he wasn't the only one keeping secrets.

I couldn't want you anymore

Kiss in the kitchen like its a dance floor

I couldn't want you anymore tonight (tonight, tonight)

It was the night when the music teacher was killed. Scott ran to look for Lydia and told you to stay behind but her stubborn ass wasn't having it. He was fighting Jennifer Blake when Y/N ran into the room. "Y/N get out!" he yelled through a mouth full of canines. "Scott," she gasped. Everything after that was a blurr. Jennifer had thrown Scott into a table and stalked towards Y/N like she was some kind of prey. Scott tried with all his strength to get up but he was just too weak. He kept yelling for Jennifer not to hurt Y/N to no avail. Imagine his suprise when Y/N began to move at inhuman speed as she fought Jennifer. She fought long and hard but in the end she fell to her knees with a knife in her abdomen. Scott ran to her through his weak state. Everything around him shut down, all he could do was focus on her heartbeat as it slowed. He pleaded for her to stay with him as he held her. "I love you Y/N. Please. Don't," he sobbed. "Relax Scott I'm not dying," she groaned as she pulled the knife out. Everyone around them watched in awe as the wound underneath the grey t-shirt healed. They started flooding her with question after question, but not Scott. He just had one question. "What are you?" "I could ask you the same thing," she chuckled. "I'm a werewolf. What about you?" he asked. "Werewolf," she said as she flashed her eyes golden. "I love you too," she whispered as she pulled him into a passionate kiss.

Wondering headshake

Tired eyes are the death of me

Mouth full of toothpaste

Before I got to know you

It wasn't long before they actually got together. Nothing much had changed though, other than the kissing and sex. And as much as she was a great fighter, she was still his little sunflower. She stuck with him through everything. She was there when he became a True alpha, she was there when he, Stiles and Allison had to get rid of their darkness, she was there when Stiles was possessed and she was there, in his room, holding him as he cried in her arms hours after Allison died in his. Y/N didn't cry that night. She just wasn't the type to. Intead she was unusually quiet. "I should give you some space," she said as she got up to leave. "No. Stay. Please," he whispered.

I've got your face

Hung up high in the gallery

Out of this shade (sunflower, sunflower)

There was one instant where Y/N was jealous. Kira. Scott was jusy far too friendly with her and it made Y/N feel insecure. Maybe he liked Kira more than her. She came up with several reasons why: her hair, her skin, her body, her face. Kira was just better than her and it tore her apart. She wasn't mean to Kira about it though. How could anyone be? She's a whole ray of sunshine. Another reason for Scott to like her more. She started cancelling dates and plans because of it. She never cried about it though. She never told Scott she had anxiety because she didn't wanna seem like she was burdening or anything. At some point she stopped answering his calls and texts, and avoiding him all together. Not because she didn't love him anymore. But because she was afraid he didn't love her anymore. Oh how wrong she was. One afternoon as she was getting into her car, she felt someone gently grab her wrist and turn her around. "Y/N talk to me. You haven't been responding to my texts or calls. Are you okay? Have I done something wrong? If I have, how do I fix it?" he rambled. "You...I...I dont know," she whispered. "I'm sorry," he said, tears welling up in his eyes. "No! Its not your fault. I just got a little insecure," she reassured him. "Of Kira," she added quietly. He didn't say anything for 5 seconds before pulling her into a soft, loving kiss. "I love you." And he did. Hell so did she. She loved him more than sunflowers.

Your flowers just died

Plant new seeds in the mellody

Let me inside

I wanna get to know you

I don't wanna make you feel bad but I've been trying hard not to act a fool

My sunflower (sunflower, sunflower)

Y/N had only ever cried once in her life since she turned 5. "Scott! Scott no! NO! Mason who did this!" she screamed as she ran towards the stairs. She had an entire emotional breakdown at the sight of the lifeless corpse of the love of her life as Melissa tried her best to revive him. She would've helped if she had the strength but she didn't. Just the thought of living without Scott shattered her. Mason tried to comfort her but it was just all too much for her. The emotion was far too overwhelming and had come down on her harder than a tsunami on a single sunflower.

I couldn't want you anymore

Kiss in the kitchen like its a dancefloor

I couldn't want you more tonight (tonight, tonight)

I couldn't want you anymore

Kids in the kitchen, listen to dancehall

I couldn't want you anymore tonight

As if the heavens had heard her cries, Scott roared. His alpha eyes went back to brown immediately when he caught the sight of Y/N crying in Mason's arms. "Y/N," he said as he reached out to touch her. "I'm not ready to lose you," she said softly. He wiped her tears and kissed her forehead. She cleaned his wounds and stayed with him until they healed. She was a little bitter towards the rest of the pack except for Mason, Lydia and Kira because they didnt abandon him. The latter were victims of circumstance. Stiles and Liam on the other hand, she couldn't stand them. She never spoke to them until the end of the Theo Raeken/Lu Bête saga. And even then, it wasn't like she was extra friendly. She spoke to them because she had to. Scott wasn't mad at them though, he was okay as long as his sunflower was okay.

Sunflower

My eyes

Want you more than a melody

Let me inside

Wish I could get to know you

The rest of senior year came and went with thw Ghost rider saga. She was actually pretty glad to have Stiles back. Then came college. Y/N was supposed to leave for New York when strange animal occurrences got in the way. "How the hell is any of this more important than my college education?" she groaned as Scott, Malia and Lydia tried to talk her out of leaving. "It could mean that everyone's in danger," Lydia sighed. "Liam and his friends can handle it. Babe you're supposed to be headed for UC Davis. Malia, France! Lydia, MIT awaits you and I gotta go to Julliard," she yelled. "Come on. Please, its just a week," Scott said as his hands made their way to her waist. "Fine." A week turned a gruesome month, battling with something that uses your fears against you called the Anuk-ite. A week turned into a gruesome month of war with Tamora Monroe and her merry band of "hunters", aided by Gerard Argent. A whole month of death. But just like every battle they fought, they emerged victorious. She had just kissed Scott to help heal his eyes when she collapsed to her knees. Blood began pouring from her mouth as Scott rushed to her side. He began searching for the wound like a madman, hoping he could heal it. "Scott, baby. Its okay," she whispered. "No, no no," he mumbled after finding the bullet wound in her side. She had been shot with yellow wolfsbane and it was too late. "Why didn't you tell anyone?" he asked barely over a whisper. "We were too busy fighting to keep everyone else safe," she said with a proud smile. He cradled her body and sobbed. "Hey. You know sunflowers die right?" she chuckled softly. That's when Scott realized something. She was wearing the exact same outfit she wore when they met. Only this time her hair was tied into one ponytail. The sunflowers were replaced with sunflower clips. "I love you. I always have and I-I always will," she whispered feeling herself getting weaker. "I love you too. More than anything in the world," Scott sobbed. "Promise me you'll go on and be happy. Get married, have kids or not. Just be happy," she said with a smile. Everyone else was a crying mess. He listened as her heartbeat got slower and more silent. Her last petal fell and she went limp in Scott's arms. He begged her to come back between chokef cries, but deep down he knew that she was gone. For good.

Sunflower just died

Keep it sweet in your memory

I'm still tongue-tied

Sunflower, sunflower

"And that was Sunflower vol.6 by Harry Styles from his latest album Fine Line. Great song, makes me wanna grab my girlfriend and dance," the radio presenter said. Scott turned the radio in Argent's car down as they got closer to the pack. The song started playing after he told Alec his and his pack's story and he couldn't help but let his mind wander. He knew how much Y/N would've adored the song if she were still alive. Two years without her and he still felt like a part of him was missing, but he didn't let it stop him from fighting the war. Her last wish was for him to be happy and he couldn't help but think about how the end of the war would not only make him the happiest man alive. But it would also make her smile proudly at him from her sunflower garden in heaven. That would send him over the moon. God, how he missed her. They pulled over in the parking lot where the pack agreed to meet up, and Scott couldn't help but smile at his pack. They supported him through thick and thin and stuck together because they knew how you got when they didn't. "What are you thinking about?" Alec asked. "How the death of a sunflower can come with the growth of an entire garden," Scott replied as he made his way to the pack with a proud grin.

#teen wolf #teen wolf fandom #scott mccall #scott mccall imagines #scott mccall x reader #teen wolf x reader #teen wolf imagines #scott mccall imagine #stiles stilonski #allison argent #kira yukimura #malia tate #liam dunbar #mason hewitt #theo raeken #tamora monroe #song fic #harry styles #Spotify

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kiyo-yoon · 4 years

Text

Hes already bored of watching everyone fawn over valentines day so he's probably spent all his time listening to music. Yamaguchi has been oddly quiet all day and anytime he speaks, he won't shut up about the event. He thinks a quiet Yamaguchi is an annoying Yamaguchi and eventually breaks when they're walking home after practice.

"Why do you look so depressed?"

"Umm...I'm not, it's just...Daichi and Suga were really affectionate weren't they?"

"Well they are boyfriends and its valentines day. Are you blaming them or something?"

"What? No! No! No! No! It's just...we're boyfriends and...we don't really do that...umm, but I'm not trying to hint that we do more stuff, just pointing out and observing! Ahh! But not in the creepy way! Just th-umm?"

Yamaguchis rambling would be interrupted by Tsukkishima suddenly placing his headphones on him. He would get to listen to some metal band playing for two seconds before the blonde would lean over and kiss him.

"Valentines is about love isnt it? I love music so...so take what I love. Here, J-just listen and shut up..."

And he would walk away with a blush on his face, but never allow Yamaguchi to see it! Meanwhile, Yamaguchi is literally dying on the spot, face red and hands shaking and lips tingling. Plus he's got to listen through Tsukkis headphones which is a bonus!

All day, he's been watching couples get together and give each other gifts and cards and even kisses. During breaks between classes, he cant help but point out a new couple that's gotten together, or even someone who's been kissed or hugged...

They had a short practice of volleyball today, but he couldn't even concentrate because he's been busy admiring Suga and Daichis affectionate teasing and behaviour. He's totally jealous, but doesn't show it and as a result, realises that his own boyfriend has actually forgot what day it is. They all leave Asahi and Noya to lock up and on the way home, Tsukki finally breaks and asks him what's up.

He explains and then totally freaks out when Tsukki thinks hes not happy for Suga and Daichi. His freaking out disappears when Tsukki gives him headphones and a kiss and...that's enough for him, really.

"I can't believe Tsukki just-oh my g-!"

"What did you say? Something wrong?"

"No! Sorry Tsukki!"

Considering that they're already a couple, Daichi plans out the perfect day for them. His parents are away on holiday for a week, so he's pretty keen to get Suga at his house. He's been admittedly more lovey dovey than usual and after giving Asahi a pep talk for later, he takes Suga out of practice and out to town. He takes him to a cake shop where they would have cake and whilst he's ordering, Sugas waiting at the table.

Daichi is totally known for his jealous nature and when he returns to the table and spots some drunk delinquent high schooler, with an arm draped around Suga, he politely tells the guy to...go away.

And of course when he doesnt, Daichi would provoke him until the delinquent ends up trying to start a fight. The cake shop owner ends up kicking all three of them out and Daichi storms away in a mood because everything's been ruined until Suga stops him and grabs him into a hug.

"Sorry...I guess I just wanted today to be...perfect..."

And after a bit of reassurance from Suga, a cheeky innuendo, they end up sharing a smooch and head back to Daichis.

Suga would be the type to constantly tease Daichi for not getting everything right, it's in his nature to be cheeky. He succeeds in making Daichi blush when he lies and says he's upset for not getting flowers. Where's his kiss and hug? He didn't even get him a card? Heartbroken...

Still, Its cute that Daichi is dedicated anyways. Suga would probably be the type to leave a longing kiss, enough for Daichi to remember long in class. He's been listening to his boyfriend mumble their plans to himself and he's totally flustered with that because that's just adorable.

At the end of practice, they walk towards a cake shop, hands joined together and Suga sits down at a booth whilst he's waiting for Daichi to come back with cake. Suddenly theres a weight on his shoulder and he realises it's a teenager, maybe his age? And...yep, definitely drunk and now rambling about anything and everything.

After a few attempts of trying to get this guys arm off him, the guy is refusing to budge and Daichi is standing there and then the pair start arguing and before they know it, the owner of the shop has kicked them all out. Suga ends up chasing Daichi down the street when he storms away in a huff.

"Oi wait up! Daichi! Oi!"

Daichi rambles on about how he wanted today to go perfectly and then Suga pulls him and hugs him again.

"Today was more than perfect. You were pretty perfect too"

Suga would bring his face down for a kiss and then squeeze Daichis hands and grin and hint that they should probably go back to his place because Daichis parents arent in and the rest is up to them.

All day today, his new boyfriend of one week, Kageyama has been in some sort of weird mood. It's their first valentines together, so Hinata had done some research and bought Kageyama chocolates. Unfortunately for Hinata, he didnt know Kageyama is...allergic to nuts and therefore couldn't eat it.

Practice was short that day so Kageyama decided to use the special date as...their official first date together. Hinata is still wondering why the heck his boyfriend is in a bad mood until he spots an arcade poster and teases Kageyama that he would beat him in all the games.

Challenge accepted.

They head to the arcade and after constant arguing about the other somehow cheating, they go to the coin slot machine because...its impossible to cheat on that game. Hinata spots an adorable keychain of a nose with kawaii eyes and tries his best to get it. He fails, watches Kageyama get it and when Kageyama does, Hinata has to scream at him that the keychain is not ugly, it's cute!

On their way home, Hinata is about to split ways from Kageyama when Kageyama gets all sad and moody.

"I'm not just saying it though! I'm serious!"

"Really?"

Hinata would nod with a smile.

"This is my favourite day with you!"

Kageyama would surprise him by tossing the nose keychain over and after listening to Kageyama have some sort of weird battle with himself, Hinata would try something they've never done before.

Kiss...

Except...they've never done it, Hinata doesnt know how to and he's too short to reach Kageyama. Kageyama leans down because Hinata is making some weird face and Hinata pushes himself up on his toes and kisses Kageyama on the cheek.

The lips are too far for their early stage relationship right now.

But his face turns scarlet and he cycles away home and turns around and laughs when he sees Kageyama wobble in his steps. Not bad for a first valentines.

So as soon as he wakes up, Kageyama NEEDS to plan out today since he and Hinata just got together last week. Only problem is...he's utterly clueless. What's he supposed to get Hinata? Flowers? Chocolates? Those are normal...if you're a girl.

Still, he's unsure but decides to just let today go with the flow. At school, Hinatas been commenting on his 'scary' face which, rude, it's the face he was born with. Hinata tries to give him chocolates but...hes allergic to those specific ones..oops.

He's still pretty much clueless, decides at the last minute that maybe he should do extra volleyball practice because Hinata likes that, only for Nishinoya to explain that he and Asahi are locking up instead. They havent been on a date yet so...maybe a date would be pretty good for today?

So on their walk after school, thankfully Hinata finds something for them to do! He finds a poster for a new arcade that's opened and he literally just called him a loser...

Challenge accepted!

Hinata somehow wins the air hockey game three times in a row, cheating obviously, until they both settle on a coin slot game. No way Hinata could cheat on that...

He doesn't, but now Hinata has a new motive and that's to get the most ugliest nose keychain in the world...it even has kawaii eyes on it, as if that'll make it look cute.

In the end, Hinata doesn't win the keychain, but he does instead. He keeps it for a while because...is he supposed to give it to him right now? Later?

They end up walking to a certain path that they'll split ways when Kageyama finally decides to hand over the ugly stupid keychain that makes Hinata smile so much.

"Yeah, just keep it, or throw it away, or keep it..."

And then Hinata would surprise him by making some sort of...weird face by widening his eyes and suddenly theres lips on his cheek and...wow, they technically just kinda kissed in some sort of weird way...

Before he knows it, Hinatas cycled away and he needs to walk home and...wow, his legs are so wobbly right now.

Thank God Hinata can't see his embarrassing smile right now.

Hopefully valentines will be the same next year.

She's not really bothered about valentines to be honest. She's just getting right into her studies and managing the volleyball team etc...

During school, she spots several couples acting all loved up because of the day and...well, she just passes by. She's not one for poking around in anyones personal business, even if it is just something silly like receiving a box of chocolates.

Her only thought right now is...why is she the manager of a ridiculous childish volleyball team?

Because it certainly looks like Tanaka is proposing to Nishinoya and the libero is hiding some sort of letter behind his back. Oh. Tanaka is using his girl voice...isnt it usually the guy who proposes?

Still, she cant help but let out an adorable giggle which attracts Tanakas attention and suddenly, he's bounding over towards her with his face flushed red. He shouts her name loudly, once exactly and then suddenly retracts and spins around and sprints out the hallway.

What...just happened?

Later, at practice, Kiyoko ends up getting a call from her mum, warning her that it's still quite dark at night so she was to be careful.

Tanaka, being the loud person with a heightened sense of hearing, decides to shout and declare that he'll walk her home and...well, maybe a bit of company would be nice?

Maybe she should put Tanaka out of his misery already...

Nah, she's way too playful like that.

"Maybe...maybe you can walk me home?"

And Tanaka? Well, he does his usual adorable cheer that he does and they're on their way! She refuses to let him hold her bag though, shes self independent that way.

Its decided as soon as the clock struck midnight and its valentines, but he decides that he wants to make today a day that Kiyoko will remember!

Obviously he'll get the bro advice from Nishinoya since he has also asked for some advice. So, he ends up heading to school, bumps into Nishinoya who is...screaming about a letter that was posted through his door that morning and Tanaka can only snort at the original poem that's been written inside.

He advises his bro that he should totally just let it play out, be all romantic and even does a simple drama performance for him to follow. And then...Kiyoko is standing there looking perfect as per usual and she blinks twice and suddenly, his feet have left the floor, ready to shout for Kiyoko to hear his confession!

Wait

Hes supposed to be all suave and romantic, especially on the most romantic day of the year. So he stops, clears his throat and spins around and sprints out of there, embarrassed! He was totally NOT cool!

Later at practice, he hears Kiyoko mention that they'll be finishing up soon and then answers her phone. Tanaka just so happens to be standing nearby and hears Kiyokos mother mention how dangerous the streets are because it's still quite dark. This could be his chance!

He could totally walk her home, right? At least occupy her?

"Oi! Kiyoko! I can walk you home if you want!"

For a second, it seems like shes gonna just ignore him again, but then she gives him the most adorable tiny smile ever and nods ever so slightly.

"Maybe...maybe you can walk me home?"

Then hes ready to run away because Kiyoko ignoring him is pretty hot but-hang on, she just said...

Yes!

"Spending valentines with Kiyoko!"

She smiles again and he notices her bag and holds a hand out.

"I'll carry your bag!"

"No thanks"

Where to begin?

Asahi ends up having a nightmare of a valentines! Hes spent every single day of being in Nishinoyas presence, debating whether he should confess to him or not. He ends up asking for Asahi and Sugas advice over the phone for several nights before he finally comes up with the idea.

A letter? That's pretty basic and even Nishinoya should understand the concept behind that. So he wrote one out, maybe the original poem was too much but he had too many things to say and a poem sounds like it should be enough to express his feelings.

He slides it into Nishinoyas foot locker and sprints away before the said boy comes in and catches him. Now he just needs to wait.

So naturally, in class, he cant concentrate. He cant focus on any of his schoolwork and Suga ends up flicking him on the back of the head with a rubber during class because he can literally see Asahi shaking that much...

Why did he ask Nishinoya to stay behind after practice again? Why did he write that? Nishinoya probably wants a different valentines. What if he rejects him? What if he decides that he just...oh god. What if he quits the team? Never speaks to him again? Could he be reading all of Noyas signals wrong?

Something hard hits the back of his head again and he turns around and theres Suga again with his criticising look. The teacher yells and he turns back around with an apology. How embarrassing.

Later, at practice, he's ready to freak out again because Kageyama asks Nishinoya if he and Hinata could lock up. They'd recently become a couple...what if Noya said yes? Asahi wouldnt be able to give his confession...

Thankfully, Noya says no with an apology and then a short explanation that he and Asahi would do it instead. Then Daichi is running over and patting Asahi on the back with a calm 'Try not to freak out. Dont worry, just worry about Suga if you do end up chickening out' and then hes away again!

When it's just the two of them, they clean up together, quietly until Nishinoya finally pulls out the letter from his bag and looks up at Asahi.

"This letter..."

And of course...he freaks out.

"Umm! Oh! It's just...you dont have to read it, well even though it looks like you already have, but it's not worth reading, I suppose you could just look at it as a joke if you want to, but even though it's real...I'm sorry if it wasted your time!"

And to his surprise, Nishinoya only laughs and wiggles the letter in his hand.

"It didn't waste my time, but...are you serious? About your feelings...about you liking me since I was a first year?"

"Mhmm! Of course! I just...sorry, that probably sounded creepy!"

"Eh? No! No of course not!"

"But it's the truth! I'm completely honest! You...you're the best person to have ever come into my life so...so please hear my confession! I...I love you Noya!"

He's pretty sure he hears Noya chuckle for a bit and he wishes he could see him, but suddenly tears are building in his eyes and the thought of rejection from Nishinoya of all people is enough to make him cry.

His body is suddenly falling forwards, Noya is falling backwards because hes grabbed onto him but Asahi is fast, so he loops his arms around Noya and straightens them up so they're standing. Noya grins and then pushes forwards for a hug and presses his forehead against Asahis forehead, his blonde fringe pushing against the aces headband. Asahi can only sigh in relief because thank god...he couldn't imagine going on in life if this turned out differently.

He's never really thought about valentines to be honest. He's always had one person in mind and he's pretty sure that's rude to try and confess to your upperclassmen. Sure he plays along with Tanaka to protect Kiyoko, but its more of a...let's protect the girl because guys are creepy predators kinda thing...

Anyways, he heads to school like a normal day, changes shoes and...is that a letter?

It totally is!

Someone just...this is definitely Asahis handwriting! This was a dream, right? If so, please dont wake him up!

He reads the inside, smiles at the cute poem and when he realises theres a message asking to stay behind after practice so they could talk, he fist pumps the air and rushes to find Tanaka.

He shows him the letter, asks for advice and all Tanaka does is simply tell him to let the day play it out, just like a volleyball game. He even gets down on one knee and pretends to propose, as if that'll happen today.

Still, he keeps it in mind, not for...future reasons...

He watches Tanaka sprint over to Kiyoko within seconds and then run away and remembers that he and Tanaka were on the phone last night. The future ace had declared that he wanted valentines to go perfectly for Kiyoko, so he would act like the perfect gentleman!

Still, he waves to Kiyoko and heads to class.

The rest of the day, he doesnt see Asahi which isnt much of a surprise since they're in different years. He has caught sight of Suga and Daichi kissing at some point and frowns.

If he and Asahi were to get together, there would surely be a lot of looks. People already mistook him as an elementary kid and Asahi as a grown man who is also apparently a delinquent. But hey, when was he to care about looks?

He looks away from Suga and Daichi in the distance and lightly pats his burning cheeks twice before shaking his head. He liked Asahi, no, he loved Asahi! He'd admired the man from day one!

So when it comes to the end of practice which is cut fairly short, he has to quickly explain to Kageyama that he and Asahi would be locking up instead. Kageyama looks slightly annoyed but hey, he always looks like that. He ends up showing Asahi the letter and of course, the big ball of anxiety starts to flip.

But in the end, Asahi confesses properly...reveals that he's liked Noya from day one and...

"I love you too you big baby! Oi! Why are you crying?! I accepted your confession! Baka!"

And then he lunges forwards to try and grab Asahi into a hug but they end up staggering for a bit and...god, he wishes Asahi would just stop crying! He does though, and they hug and Noya really wants to kiss him right now, but hes pretty sure the ace would faint if he did it right now. So he settles for a forehead touch, just so he can reassure Asahi that he's there and...he's not planning on going away anytime soon.

He's there, he's not disappearing and even when Asahi graduates, he knows they'll still be together, no matter what obstacle they face.

#tsukkiyama #daisuga #kagehina #tanaka x kiyoko #asanoya #tsukishima #yamaguchi #daichi #suga #kageyama #hinata #tanaka #shimizu kiyoko #asahi #nishinoya #haikyuu!!#haikyuu #happy valentines day

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anythingandeverything1d · 4 years

Text

Bandmate Harry

“Thank you and goodnight!” Harry yelled, walking off stage. You finished the drum solo, allowing the rest of the band to walk off and then followed suit, waving to the crowd as you walked by. You meet in the circle backstage and high five the rest of the band and Harry.

“We killed it tonight!” you screamed with a smile. Harry gave you the look and you settled down, waiting for the end of show meeting. Some of the tour crew joined in and you rolled your eyes. They were always acting like they were part of the band.

“Great job everyone. Rest up tonight, we do it again tomorrow. Does anyone have any notes they'd like to share?” Harry asked looking around the circle.

One of the lighting guys raised his hand, “What did you think of the lighting tonight, specifically the spotlighting during Falling and Treat People with Kindness?”

“I loved it, great job.” Harry smiled.

“Actually,” you cut in. “I do think you could do a better job. I mean you basically blinded the band during Cherry. We’ve had this problem for weeks now..I feel like we shouldn't have to keep bringing it up.”

Harry gave you a warning look and you gave it right back to him. “I’m sorry about that, is there something you suggest us changing?” the lighting man asked. He looked embarrassed, and he should have. He wasnt doing his job.

“I don't know? Maybe figuring out your job?” you remarked back. Harry intervened.

“Its been going great. Thank you. I don't feel like you need to change anything and its my call.” He shot you a look and you rolled your eyes. “Meetings over, everyone get some sleep.” You turned to walk towards the bus when Harry grabbed the back of your shirt and pulled you into his dressing room. “Sit.” he ordered.

You sat on the couch and crossed your arms looking up at him. “What do I owe this pleasure?”

Harry was pacing in front of you. “How many times have we had this talk now?”

“I don't know...” you grumbled.

“Exactly because its happened too many times. This is getting ridiculous (y/n). The way you treat the tour crew is absolutely unacceptable. You do not run the shows, you are not in charge, and you do not have the ability to talk to people like that. They are equivalent to you and your position on our team.”

“But-”

“No. No buts. This is the last time we are having this talk or you are gone. You're also grounded.”

“Grounded?!” you yelled standing up. “You cant ground me!”

“I just did.”

“Youre not my parents.”

“You're only 16, and your parents left me in charge of you while we were away on tour so yes. Yes I can. No going out tonight.”

“Or what?”

“Or you will be out of the band. I will send you home.”

“You wouldn't do that.”

“I can easily find a drummer, probably one who treats the crew better too.”

“Harry..” you moaned.

“No. Don’t Harry me.” He ran his fingers through his hair and looked at you. “You know that I love you. You know I don't want to have to remove you from the tour...but I will if I have too. Understood?”

“Yes” you mumbled.

“What was that?”

“Yes I understand.” you said. “Now can I go?”

Harry sighed and nodded his head. You walked back to your dressing room. You threw your phone onto the couch and screamed. He thinks he can march in here and tell me what to do. He thinks he's my dad. I don't have to listen to him. I can do whatever I want. Im basically an adult now. Having Harry as your older brother or parent figure on tour was fun...most of the time. He played games, kept you updated on drama, listened to your drama and made sure you were always okay and comfortable. Other times though, like tonight, he overstepped his big brother role. Your phone buzzed and you saw a text from Noah, your boyfriend. *Im outside.* You smiled and ran to the door. Noah was waiting backstage and you tackled him when you got outside. He squeezed your bum and grinned. “Hey you. Ready to go?”

“Go where?”

“Theres this dope night club. They are going to do a Cold Play night.”

“Really?” you asked.

“Yeah. Lets go. We can get food before.”

“Okay let me just grab my jacket.” You kissed his cheek and ran inside. When you walked past Harry’s room, you could hear the shower going. He won't even know. You taped a Do Not Disturb sign on your dressing room door and locked it on your way out. You met Noah outside and he took his hand pulling you to the car waiting.

Your first stop was getting dinner. The two of you stopped off at a restaurant downtown. “Got lucky that you had the night off.” Noah said stuffing another fry into his mouth.

“Yeah. Harry went off on me today again.”

“Again? What for?”

“He thinks that I’m being rude to too many people. The thing is..those people aren't doing their job.”

“Yeah, its not really his place to tell you either. He's not your mom and dad. He's not even related to you.”

“Exactly. He tried grounding me.”

Noah laughed and you kicked him under the table. “Im sorry but thats ridiculous. He grounded you?”

“Yeah thats what he said.”

“Well who does he think he is?”

“I don't know.”

“Well just forget him. We are going to have fun tonight. I’ll even get you drinks.” He winked and you smiled. Noah was 21. He was a bit older than you but you needed an older guy. The ones your age were so immature. After finishing dinner your phone buzzed. *Want to come play games with us?* You rolled your eyes and ignored Harry’s text. He texted again, *Come on (y/n)..you cant stay mad forever*

You texted him back a middle finger emoji and turned your phone off. He was not going to ruin this night. You grabbed Noah’s hand and followed him into the club. When you enter its wall to wall people. Viva la vida is playing and you instantly jump up and pull Noah to the dance floor where you're singing along, “I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing, Roman Cavalry choirs are singing, Be my mirror, my sword and shield, My missionaries in a foreign field, For some reason I can't explain, Once you go there was never, never a honest word, And that was when I ruled the world”

The night was going smoothly. You hadn't heard anything else from Harry and Noah was a lot of fun. He was buying you drink after drink and you had to admit you were feeling it. You were slurring words and tripping over other people. Paradise started playing, it was one of your favorite songs and you instantly started singing. “When she was just a girl she expected the world, But it flew away from her reach, So she ran away in her sleep and dreamed of, Para-para-paradise, para-para-paradise, para-para-paradise, Every time she closed her eyes” Noah came over and danced with you. He roughly pulled you back against him, his fingers digging into your hips. “ow” you mumbled. He kissed down your neck and reached his hands up the skirt you were wearing. “Noah-”

“Shh have a little fun baby.” His fingers pushed through your panties and his lips were sucking on your neck.

“Stop. This isn't what I want to be doing.” You were sobering up real quick. You turned around to push him off but he grabbed your butt hard enough you were going to be bruised. You whimpered in pain.

“Don't be a little pussy.” he said harshly.

“Noah let go.” You pushed against his chest harder and he laughed. He grabbed your wrist and pulled you in.

“Stop fighting (y/n). Just let loose a little.”

“No. Stop.” you pulled away and he grabbed you again “Noah let go. Serious-”

“She said let go.” Harry’s deep voice growled behind you. Your stomach sank. You looked back and Harry looked lethal, it almost scared you. Noah laughed and looked at you.

“Look its your pretend parent.” He expected you to laugh but you were afraid of both situations and didnt do anything. Noah gripped your wrist harder. “Isn't that funny?”

“Yeah.” you fake laughed and pulled your wrist free of his grip. He stumbled forward but Harry stopped him. Harry’s hands were on his chest and his normally bright and cheerful eyes were full of anger.

“When a girl says let go. You let go.” Noah swallowed, recognizing the different side of Harry he was seeing. “Do you even get that she's underage. She's 16 fucking years old and your giving her alcohol and trying this shit? Its illegal.” Noah nodded and tried backing up.

You suddenly got very afraid Harry was going to hit him. “Harry.” you grabbed him and pulled him back. “Lets just go okay? He's not worth it.” Harry seemed to calm down a little. He turned his anger to you and pointed at the door.

“Now.” he grabbed your hand and pulled you from the club. You didnt even say anything. You didnt know what to say. You had been caught red handed.

Harry pushed you into the passenger seat of his black SUV. He buckled you in and then jumped in the driver side. Without saying anything he just started driving. “I’m sorry.” you said. “I know you said not to go out but I just thought it would be fun and Noah said there was a cold play night and I love cold play and” Harry didnt even look over. You sighed and dropped your head into your hands. You started crying, you weren't sure if you were scared after what happened with Noah, drunk from the alcohol, or frustrated that you screwed up with Harry. “I shouldn't have gone. I know I didnt listen. I’m sorry.” Harry pulled over and parked the car. He turned and looked at you.

“Are you okay?” he asked calmly.

“Yeah..” you wiped the tears and looked at him. “I-”

“Stop. I want you to seriously think about it. Are you okay?” You were still crying when you nodded your head. Harry got out, walked around opened your door and hugged you. His arms tightly wrapping around your body. He rubbed your back and just held on until you calmed down. He wiped your cheeks and smiled. “Breathe (y/n).”

You took a shaky deep breath and nodded. Harry had gotten back in the car and was driving somewhere past the arena. “Where are we going?” You started to panic. What if this was it, what if he was sending you home now? “Please...Pleasedoonttakemehome” you cried.

Harry laughed and shook his head. “I’m not taking you home.”

“Where are you taking me?”

Harry pulled into a frozen yogurt shop and smiled. “Come on.” He handed you a cup and told you to get whatever you wanted. You loaded it with fruit candy and chocolate. Harry sat down with his at a table and you followed suit. He watched you calm down while eating the yogurt. “Now. Are you ready to talk about this?” You nodded tears forming again. You tried blinking them away but it wasnt working. “(y/n) youre not in trouble.” Harry said with a sigh.

“I’m not? But-but you said”

“I know. I was wrong. I shouldn't have punished you like that. Its just that youre so frustrating sometimes. I want you to understand where this is all coming from. Youre like my baby sister and I don't want you to make bad decisions. I don't want you to turn out a total bitch.”

You smiled and nodded. “I know.”

“I shouldn't try and parent you. I shouldn't have grounded you. I just need you to know that talking to the crew like that isn't okay.”

“I know. Im trying I really am.”

He nodded. “I know. Thats why Im letting you lying and sneaking out go tonight.”

You nodded. “It won't happen again.”

“I know. I also think we should talk about boys. Can’t you find like a nice church boy? Someone your own age.”

“Harry you do realize I’m always around older guys right?”

“Yeah, which is fine. Just don't date them. There have to be other options. I mean that guy was an absolute dick.” You laughed and Harry laughed. “I don't want to see you get hurt. I thought you were going to end up hurt tonight.”

You nodded. “I almost did but my big bro saved me.”

“I always will.”

---

Got this request forever ago (SORRY) but I hope its what you were expecting! Let me know how old you all are also, I’d love to write more in your perspective vs mine!

xoxo

#one direction #directioners #one direction fanfiction #one direction imagines #Harry Styles #harrystyles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines

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creambunnie · 4 years

Text

No Rush

ONEWE - Harin Fluff

it was your birthday.

you lied down on your bed, scrolling through your sns, waiting for a call from a certain someone, named Ju Harin.

Harin was your bestfriend (mayhaps, your crush too) and he was in a cool street band called ONEWE.

he had been busy these days with his bandmates, preparing for their upcoming gig. this gig was bigger than their previous ones, which explained why they had more things to settle .

Harin was so busy that you haven't had the chance to meet him face to face the past few weeks.

the both of you did text everyday, but they were more like short messages , just to ask about each other's wellbeing.

no deep talks, no random stuffs, just simple texts asking if they were eating and resting well.

you sighed for the nth time that day before standing up, deciding to go eat some strawberry cheesecake your family bought for your birthday.

"did harin call you already?". your mom asked as you were taking some of the dessert in the kitchen.

you only shook your head but quickly looked up when you heard your mom chuckled.

"i'm sure he will soon. just try to be presentable, okay?". your mom comforted and winked before walking out .

you blinked at her words, clearly confused about what she was talking about. you decided to just clear your mind and distract yourself with food.

after enjoying your sweet treat, which probably only took less than 10 mins, you went back to your room, and repeated the cycle earlier.

you almost dozed off to sleep while playing with your phone when suddenly your screen changed, displaying Harin's name , requesting for a videocall.

you cursed under your breath as you quickly patted down your hair quickly and rubbed your eyes to get rid of any sleep before answering the call.

you were greeted with a synchronised "Happy Birthday !" wish from all the 5 boys.

yeah, you were bestfriends with Harin so his bandmates automatically became your friends too.

Cya and Dongmyeong were like little brothers to you, you would pamper them with food everytime you visit the band.

Kanghyun was a same-age friend. you would just chill quietly with him when others were too loud and your energy had drained.

Yonghoon was a great big brother you've never had. he was the only one who knew about your crush on Harin. no, you didn't tell. he figured it out.

"y/n?? y/n ! are you okay?". your thoughts were interrupted by the sweet deep voice that you've been missing.

you quickly looked back at the screen of your phone and nodded vigorously.

"yeah yeah i'm okay! i was just a bit surprised from your call. aww thank you guys for calling!! i was about to get mad at Harin for not calling me at all on my birthday!". you explained and pouted at the last part as your gaze turned towards Harin.

you didn't notice but Harin's ears turned red when he saw your cute expression. he cleared his throat and moved around his seat.

"well i am here aren't i?". Harin tried to act normal.

his bandmates snickered at him quietly . you rolled your eyes at his response and flashed a shy smile.

all of you caught up with one another, sharing about the episodes that you've been missing out about each other.

"and then Harin got scolded by Hyungu for playing with his ukelele!". Dongmyeong, the talkative one was telling about their practice the other day.

"but who wouldn't get angry if someone played around with your instruments? it could get spoiled!". Kanghyun, the quiet one was actually loud in this videocall, trying to defend himself.

"yeah yeah, not like you've never thrown my drumsticks around the studio!". Harin contorted back.

their bickering got cut when they heard you chuckled from the screen.

"ahh i really miss you guys.... it feels so refreshing hearing you guys argue like an old married couple!".

the boys' expression softened up as they saw your happy face.

Harin can't deny the fact that he was missing you really bad right now. he wished he could just drive to your place but due to his circumstances, he wasn't able to.

Harin just wanted to pat your head lovingly right now and pinch your cute cheeks. the slight dimples on your cheeks were his favourite .

your eyes unnoticingly found its way to Harin who was staring at you admiringly. you blinked at the sudden eye contact and scratched your head awkwardly as you felt your face warmed up.

Yonghoon sensed the unspoken need of alone time for the two bestfriends. he nudged Kanghyun and poked the two youngest gently.

"hey guys, let's give Harin some time alone with his bestfriend.". Yonghoon said softly.

the three boys understood the oldest and excused themselves politely before leaving the two of you alone.

"i miss you....".

you gave a shy smile as you heard Harin's words.

"i miss you too... i hope things are settled quickly for you guys so we can meet and hang! i'm sorry i can't visit you guys too these days, i'm a bit busy with work and i don't want to disturb you...". you replied.

Harin nodded in understandment and reached his hand out as if he could hold yours.

"you don't even know how much i want to hug you right now.. hugging the members just don't feel the same.". Harin pouted as he complained.

you giggled at his randomness and shook your head.

"you're so clingy! you can hug me as much as you want when we meet , okay?". you comforted as you scrunched up your nose at Harin's cuteness.

Harin suddenly sat up and looked at his phone.

"ah!! go to your front door now! i have a surprise for you.". Harin instructed.

your eyes widened as you quickly did as told.

"Ju Harin!!! this is , beautiful!". you screamed the moment you entered back your room with your arms wrapped around some gifts .

Harin sent a delivery for your birthday gifts . you received a bouquet of flowers and a package .

"ah let me call the others! they have to see you open your present ! it's from all of us!". Harin said and quickly screamed the members' names.

you waited for all of them to sit back down. you grinned as you excitedly unpacked the package . the boys were anticipating your reaction to their gift.

you squeled as you took out a small box that had a post-it on it saying 'OPEN ME FIRST'.

"WAHHH". you said in delight as you pulled out the ring necklace .

ONEWE smiled at your reaction and called out your name to show you their own necklaces .

your names were engraved on the rings. they gifted you the rose gold one, and they all had the silver one.

"we decided to gift you something that is meaningful. we hope you love it!". CyA said as he fiddled with his necklace.

you nodded and wore the friendship necklace right away. "i love it!!". you exclaimed.

you admired the necklace for a few more seconds before turning back to the package. there was another box.

"oh? what's this ?". you asked as you took the box.

Harin grinned before cheekily asking the members to leave him alone again.

you raised an eyebrow before opening the second box.

you gasped at the beautiful gift and looked at Harin with admiration. "this is so beautiful Harin!". you whispered as you pulled out the watch out of the box.

Harin smiled widely at your cute expression. he then showed his wrist and giggled cutely.

he had the bigger version of the watch while he gave you the smaller one.

"i thought besides the friendship necklace, we two should have our coup--- uhm bestfriend matching things too. so i bought this watch for us !". Harin explained, and almost exposing his feelings for you.

you scanned the watch carefully before putting it on.

"i love it!". you exclaimed over and over again, making Harin feel good of himself.

the two of you ended up sitting in front of the screen quietly, admiring each other. but your quiet moment was interrupted by Yonghoon.

"hey Harin! are you done? i wanna talk to your bestfriend too!". Yonghoon shouted from the other side.

"yeah! i want to complain a lot of things about you!". Dongmyeong added.

"you're not the only one who misses y/n!". CyA whined cutely. Kanghyun only nodded, agreeing with CyA.

Harin flashed an embarrassed smile before nodding, allowing his members to join back the call.

"don't worry, i'll call you again later at night. we can talk alone then..". you whispered through the screen.

Harin smiled shyly and nodded vigorously as he gave you a thumbs up.

the atmosphere became chaotic again as the boys talked over one another, excited to share with you everything.

you still think you were the only one who had feelings for Harin, and Harin thought he was the only one who had feelings for you.

or maybe you knew Harin liked you too. and maybe Harin too knew that you liked him.

but the two of you were too afraid to move on to the next level which might ruin your friendship in the future. the both of you decided to take it slow and enjoy your current relationship. no rush....

a/n : submitted this for a oneshot contest but didnt get the opportunity to win the prize 😆 but it's okay~ my intention was not to win but to let others enjoy some onewe contents 💕💕 hope you guys enjoyed this fluffy harin😗😗😗

#onewe #onewe harin #onewe ju harin #onewe imagines #onewe fluff #harin imagines #onewe harin imagines #harin fluff #onewe harin fluff #STAN ONEWE

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madamsixx · 4 years

Text

Beyond The Leather:

Chapter 8: Nikki Annoying Sixx

February 20, 1985

Six New messages

Hey Mani its Nikki, sorry about yesterday I didnt mean to speak to you like that. You just get under my skin somtimes. Well call me back I'd like to see you.

Beep : Message Deleted

Sooooo I'm calling again to check up on you. You haven't called me back. Call me back.

Beep: Message Deleted

Mani your really fucking pissing me off ok call me back. By the way I'm learning how to cook for you. Well actually us. The things I do for you.

Beep: Message Deleted

Hey princess I'm sorry ok, just talk to me. Were having alot of fun in the studio. Tommy wants you to come by. Plus you should try the food I made.

Beep: Message Deleted

Princess please call me back. Stop fucking ignoring me. Your making me angry.

Beep: Message Deleted

Mani I miss you. Please call me.

Beep: Message Deleted

That was the last messege I listened to before ripping the phone cord out. I have been ignoring him since the last time I saw him. Nikki was into drugs and that wasn't my life. I'm a respectable girl who comes from a respectable family and my mom would throw a fit if she ever found out I was hanging out with someone like Nikki sixx. He will just have to get over us being friends. Anyways, Tamara came back scolding me on my outfit for the Joan Rivers interview. She said I looked awful that made me laugh actually. Theresa was fired right away because of what happened, but also because she was doing drugs. I was now on a very tight leash. Especially because I got the part for the movie. And after my birthday in September, I will no longer be doing teen magazines. I will be featured on the cover of the biggest magazines.

"Hey honey soooo theres two things, one in March you will be on the cover of Sports Illustrated Magazine and two you have an interview with Barbara Walter's." Tamara shouted and I jumped up screaming. "She is sooo excited to meet you." I ran and hugged her this was exciting. I couldn't wait to tell my mom. I was heading home for a couple of weeks. "Um why did you unplug the phone cord missy?" Tamara ask with one hand on her hip and the other holding the cord.

"Oh uh I tripped over the cord by accident sorry. Haha clumsy me." I lied. ______

I spent the evening until night shopping. I started to realize I was a shopaholic when I constantly kept going out to buy new clothes, jewellery, heels, and hand bags. I was really into fashion and mixing cloths together. I was also into cosmetics like really into it. Maybe down the line I'll venture into business, but for now its acting and modeling.

I was inside a shop and saw this really cute handbag. I mean I had several but why not get one more. I purchased it, and I'm not going to tell you the price. I headed out of the store and got into my limo. Can you beleive it, I'm in a limo.

When I reached back at the condo. My chauffeur helped me get my bags out and carry them upstairs. "Thank you Daniel." I say while giving him 100. "No problem Miss Darlington." He took it and left. I saw a note by the table.

Went to office be back later- Tammi.

Well I'll show her what I bought when she gets back. I was so excited to start trying on my new clothing. And everything else with it. This was the life that I never thought I could have. I bought some stuff for my sisters, my mom, and aunts and uncles. They will really love them. I sheded down into my bra and panties taking off cloths and trying new ones. I put on these nice thigh high boots that could be worn in the winter time. After all I am going home for a couple of weeks. And its snowing in Canada. With a cute black romper. I heard a knock on the door and ran to go and get it. "Coming!" I yelled. I opened it up with out even looking through the peek hole, stupid me.

And saw none other then Nikki annoying Sixx, and he did not look happy. I tried to shut it right away but he put his arm between the door and was pushing back.

"Mani please just let me in." He says while he's forcefully trying to get in.

"Nikki go away!" I say pushing back.

With a big push. Nikki forces the door open and the impact sends me flying and hitting the ground with a thud.

"Oh shit I'm sorry." He laughs.

"It's not funny my butt cheek is hurting you ass!" I yell at him.

"Tsk tsk tsk I thought you didn't swear princess." He smirks.

God he is truly annoying.

"C'mere doll let me help you up." He wobbles towards me almost loosing his footing. He was drunk and probably high.

"Your drunk Nikki, you need to leave Tamara is downstairs." I lied.

"I'm drunk and high." He smirks. "And no shes not."

"And how do you know?" I asked furrowing my brows.

"Because I saw her leave and shes going to be gone for a while." He smiles walking towards my shopping bags.

"So you camped outside the condo until she left?" I asked walking behind him.

"No I camped on the 5th floor in some random chicks place. She let me come in with her." He says while pulling cloths out of the bags.

What the hell is wrong with this guy. I mean really!

"Nikki why are you hear?" I demanded.

"Im here because your ignoring my fucking phone calls. I've left you several fucking messages and your not returning them!" He shouted as he got in my face. I could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"Well of course I'm ignoring your calls. And now that you know one hundred percent that I am, you can go back to the 5th girls place or get out!" I yelled motioning towards the door.

Nikki smiled then walked towards the couch and sat down he kicked his feet up on the table like he was at home and put his hands behind his head. "I drove here. Your not really gonna kick a drunk and high guy out of your home to go driving on the streets now will you?"

I can't believe this guy. I was seething with anger. How dare he use something that happened to Vince to stay over here. "Nikki that is a really awful thing to say, that's not a joke. I want you out right now." I say with a stern voice.

"No." He sneered. He kicked his shoes off then grabbed the TV remote turned it on then changed it to MTV.

I had enough of this guy. I decided to just call security and have them deal with him. I took off my boots then walked towards the phone picking it up to dial security. Next thing I know Nikki is charging at me grabbing the phone from my hand.

"Nikki stop it!" I yelled trying to grab the phone back.

"Just calm the fuck down Iman!" He shouted in my face. I then slapped him across the face. Something I wish I didnt do because at that point Nikki saw red. He then picked me up over his shoulders with me kicking and screaming. And walked towards my room.

"Put me down now you jerk!" I yelled.

He then threw me on the bed pinning my arms over my head. "Calm the fuck down!" He yelled

"No!" I yelled back struggling to get out of his grip. He then leaned closer to my face. Making me smell the whisky on his breath. His lips brushed against mine and he whispered with a very low voice. "Calm down princess." He bit his lips and I started breathing hard. He slowly used his legs to spread my legs open and settled in between them. I felt how hard he was through his pants.

"Your so fucking beautiful." He whispered and used his thumb to graze my bottom lip.

Nikki was dangerous. He was dangerous because he was good looking. He has a baby face, beautiful eyes, beautiful hair he's a bad boy, and he's in the biggest rock band there is. Girls love him and would fall for him so easily with out even realizing that he has a lot of problems. Drugs were his number one problem. And as long as he was doing drugs, he would always have problems.

"But I'm young Nik, and you do drugs." I say struggling to sit up and move him up off of me.

"I know princess." He moved to the side of my bed and sat with his back against the head board. He sat there in silence thinking for a bit.

"Iman I'm back, oh my God what is this mess in the living room?" I heard Tamara come in. My eyes nearly popped out of my head. "Nikki stay silent please or so help me God." I whispered to him. "Ok princess." He chuckled.

I ran out of the room with my heart eating ten time fast.

"Hey Tammi sorry I went shopping." I started picking up the bags off the ground.

"Yeah I can see that." Her eyes went wide.

"What is it with you and this phone." She picks the receiver up and puts it back.

"Sorry I was calling some of my friends." I turn over and notice Nikki's boots on the living room carpet. I slowly move towards the carpet to grab the boots.

"Honey can you grab me a drink please I'm very exhausted." Tamara asks as she walks towards the living room couch to sit down. My heart was racing u was praying that she wouldnt see those cowboy boots just lying there on the carpet. She would know for sure that someone was here. "Um sure." I walked to the kitchen and poured her some cranberry juice than brought it back to her. I grabbed one of the shopping bags and knelt down by the table and picked up the boots and put them in. "Alright I'm going to bed." I started running.

"Um hello excuse me take the rest of these bags to your room. Your making this place look like a garbage dump full of bags!" She yelled. I ran back and packed the rest of the things I bought including my boots that I kicked off. "Goodnight Tami." I hugged and kissed her. "Goodnight sweety." She kissed back. I got into the room and let out a long sigh. I looked over at Nikki who took off his blue and gold jacket and threw it on the floor and was comfortably sleeping on my bed. I crawled on my bed and shook him. "Nikki." I whispered "Nikki you have to go once Tamara goes to bed."

"Mmmm no." He says snuggling into my pillow. Well what more could I do I guess he's spending the night. I got up and turned the light off then grabbed shorts and a tank top and changed into them. I got into my bed and layed beside him and just stared at him. I starting to caress his cheek all the way to his jaw and he squirmed a bit. He then opened his beautiful green eyes and looked at me.

"Can you promise me something princess?" he whispered

"promise you what?" I whispered back.

"Promise me that when you come of age and I get my shit together that you'll be my girl. That you'll be mine and only mine?" I nodded with a smile. "No I need to hear you say it so I know there's hope." "I promise to be yours Nikki." I smiled. He leaned over and kissed the top of my head then pulled me closer to him. I snuggled tight agaisnt him and we went to sleep in each others arms.

The next day I woke up, and my eyes went wide when I realized Nikki was still in my bed. I dont know if he snores alot in his sleep when he's not drunk. But he certainly snored alot last night. I barely slept. I turned over to look at him. He looked like an angel. His messy hair was all over my pillows. I didn't want to wake him, but I know I had to. I nugded him to wake him up a bit. But he didn't even move. So then I decided after what he he did yesterday by making me hurt my butt cheek when I fell, payback seemed fair. I lifted myself into sitting position on the bed with my feet on his torso and my hands positioned behind me to give me a good balance. I pulled my legs towards me then gave him one big kick off the bed. He rolled off hitting his body on the ground and his head on the small dresser beside my bed. Woops!

"Ow you bitch, what the fuck!" He shouted on the ground. Where I couldn't see him.

"Hahahahahaha pay back hurts dosen't it."

"Fuck you."

"Now now Mr.Sixx no swearing." I chuckled.

He got up and climbed back onto the bed sitting and holding his head.

"You snore a lot."

"So I'm told." He looked at me with a smile.

"You have to go Nik."

"So your not even gonna make me breakfast. What kind of girl doesn't make breakfast for her man when he spends a night." He moves closer to me and I push away. "First off I would never make you breakfast especially when your capable of doing it your self. And second I'm not your girl." I say pointing to myself.

"Yet." Nikki says with a full on smile plastered on his face.

"I gotta use your washroom to piss. And where are my boots?" He asks getting off the bed scratching his untamed hair. I got off the bed and grabbed the plastic bag I put them in and gave them to him. He grabbed them and put them on.

"Look Nik pee in your pants or pee outside but you need to go now before Tammi catches you." I pleaded.

"Alright fine fine." He picks up his jacket and walks towards the door.

"Wait let me check first." I poke my head out to see if the coast is clear. And then signal him to come. I push him out the door fast, then run to the kitchen to grab the garbage.

"What's the garbage for, it's not even full?" He asks.

"I'm pretending like I'm throwing it away." I start giggling because he's looking at me like I'm a little devil.

"Oh babe you and me are gonna get along just fine." He says as he puts his arm around me to start walking. "So can I see you later on?"

"Sure, I'm heading back to Canada for a couple of weeks tomorrow. And I wont be back till March 11. Cause I have a photo shoot with Sports Illustrated Magazine on the 12 in the morning."

"Wow, so I need to take you somewhere special. That way you'll think of me while your away." We stopped by the elevator and he turned me to face him. Nikki could make a girls knees buckle in a second that's how good looking he was. But I kept trying to remind my self that he was no good. He could never be the man I would want him to be. But then again he did ask me to keep that promise. And he did say when he gets his "ish" together. So who knows.

"Um so I'll pick you up later?" He scratches his head and looks down at his shoes.

"Ok." I smile.

He pushes the elevator button and it comes up. We wave each other good bye. I'm not sure what this is between Nikki and I. But what ever it is, he's got me thinking about him more. A lot more. _________

I sat waiting for Nikki. He had called to say he was going to come at 3:30. It was now 4:26. I started pacing around my room. When ever I would hear the phone ring I would run to it hoping that it was him but then get disappointed when it wasn't. I started thinking about last night. What me and Nikki talked about, I did really like him. But I dont like the whole groupies, drugs, and bad boy stuff. If I was to have any future with him a lot would have to change. But also I'm still young so for me to even be thinking about these things is weird. I should be thinking about chilling with friends, sleepovers, and gossiping. But I wasn't, I didnt have any friends here in LA. Maybe that's why when ever Nikki would come around I would tag along with him. Cause the truth is I felt lonely. Nikki isn't good for me but he's the only one I have to talk to, besides Tamara. And shes always working. I had Theresa as well, but because she was fired I have no idea where she is and if she would even talk to me.

4:40 pm

I called Nikki's number again and there was no answer.

5:30 pm

Tamara called she said she would be coming back late. I hope Nikki calls.

6:15 pm

Nikki called and apologized. At least he did call. He said he'll be here by 6:30 so thats great. It means he didn't forget about me.

9:00 pm

I sat in front of the TV blankly staring at it. I couldn't tell you what was on cause I didn't really care. I just heard noises. Yelling, screaming, and someone saying please dont kill me. I sat there for another 10 minutes and then turned the TV off and went to bed. Nikki wasn't coming.

#nikki sixx #tommy lee #mick mars #vince neil #motley crue

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brynhildr13 · 5 years

Text

MY personal unofficial live report of NYC!

Again, this is NOT OFFICIAL. I was NOT PRESS. This is just MY PERSONAL account of my amazing experience!!! I copied it from my Facebook post i made. @baby-come-bach is "Melissa".

Okay. So now that im home and safe and I committed everything to memory i wanna talk about the show!!! IF you wanna just skip down to the meet and greet go down below the line. The stuff above is what happened during the concert.

The live was AMAZIIIIIINNNGGG!!! EVEN BETTER THAN THE LAST SHOW.

There was the stage, then the pit, then behind the pit was about 6 steps and a platform with a railing. Behind that was another set of steps and a railing and seating in the back. Once we got into the venue i told Melissa to take my poster and go get me the spot i wanted while i got merch. We were behind the pit at the railing on Uruha's side. He's my fave bandman and OHHHO MY GOD THE VIEW WAS. PERFECT. Melissa must have read my mind because she knew i like uruha but didnt know what side he stood on. Lolol. She guessed correctly and stayed to the right. I stayed in line for merch and got my stuff and went to meet her. I couldnt have asked for better view. We werr SO CLOSE. And above the pit so i didnt have to fall victim to my stature.

So we wait and then they start the show. And they all walk out all stoic and tall and QIDNWODNWJD. Kai came out first, then aoi and reita and uruha, then ruki last. And they went right into their songs. They sounded SOOOO good omg.

My highlights from the show:

Uruha was HEADBANGING ALL NIGHT and SPINNING AROUND AND SMILING HE WAS SOOOO INTO IT HE BROUGHT SO MUCH ENERGY.

Ruki kept dancing and shaking his shoulders and hips. He cant dance that well so it was endearing and funny but also kept the mood.

Kai was smiling like the sun the whole time. He LOVES to perform and it shows.

Reita kept bending down really low and slapping his bass really hard. Especially when they played one song that featured him. (the mortal) He went HAM. IT WAS AWESOME.

Aoi was so majestic. He didnt really MOVE much but he did walk around the stage with the others a lot. He was so captivating just like before.

And there were two or three 15-30 second pauses. Their english was WAY better than last time, especially Ruki's! He said "we were so excited to come to New York!! We're so happy to be here!!!!" And then they riled us up with call and answer. It was great!!!!

The second pause was Kai!! I didnt even know it was him until I heard talking and didnt see Ruki on stage!! But Kai said, "i love new York!! I love you guys!! We are so excited to be here!!" And then he did a call and answer with us.

I SWEAR THEY ALL LOOKED AT ME LIKE 25 TIMES DURING THE LIVE. It was like they wanted to see EVERY FAN. They kept their eyes up and out to the crowd most of the time!

I TRIED to show them support but i also wanted to actually stand and WATCH. So I really only Committed to Ninth Odd Smell, UGLY, abhor god, and Filth in the Beauty. The rest I was more tame on cuz i wanted to SEE them. But all those songs get me HYYYYPE so i had to give it my all.

They played Suicide Circus again too!!!!! And Inside Beast this time!!!! Those were the two songs Melissa knows best so she got to hear stuff she enjoyed! Also, we made sure to watch Aoi in the second verse because he bowed most regally with his arm up and he twirled his wrist as he brought it down into the bow. Just like in the music video!!! It was AMAZING. SOOOOOOOOOOO COOL!!! And Ruki's rapping was SO COOL TO HEAR LIVE AGAIN. it was even better than last show!

ONE THING I always enjoyed was when Ruki adds a little improv to long outros. For Sono Koe Wa Moroku which is a slow ballad he added his own little wisps of vocals and screams which was so cool!!

They ended the set with filth in the Beauty and the crowd kept trying to call for encore but no one knew how to keep time so everyone kept thunderclapping instead of joining together in one voice.

One girl in the pit got on someone's shoulders and lifted her top and flashed the camera that was recording us. I couldnt tell if they kicked her out or not. All i remember thinking was "thats DEFINITELY not gonna make them wanna come on stage any sooner." Also no one crowd surfed that I saw like last show. And this girl behind us was yelling "WE /DESERVE/ AN ENCORE." which irritated melissa and i a bit. Like, bitch, no you dont deserve it. You deserve the OPPORTUNITY for it. What a gross fan. I hoped they werent VIP cuz I wouldnt want her to be a bad fan to them and say anything rude. When they did come on stage that girl was acting like she single-handedly brought them out on stage. She otherwise didnt bother us. We ignored her the rest of the time. She was gone from my mind in two seconds once they came back out.

They played 3 encore songs and ended with Tomorrow Never Dies!! Which is a good song to end on. It has a beautiful message of hope. Once it was over Ruki kept saying "thank you!!" And we'd answer with a cheer and he said "we will see you again real soon!! Good night, New York!!" And then as we filtered out they checked our wrist bands and we were allowed into the seating part to wait until they were ready for the meet and greet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They called row by row and we were in the middle of the last section so we scooted out and ran to the top. I wanted to be LAST FOR THE MEET AND GREET. And we ended up DEAD LAST. We were next to these girls who flew FROM JAPAN to see them. I would have liked to talk to them but I was so nervous to, so i just quietly listened to them converse in japanese.

When they called us we filed down! And we went thru these doors and there were small steps and THERE. THEY. WERE. right there!!! I saw Reita's mask and hair and my stomach dropped cuz it was ACTUALLY THEM. So melissa helped me get the poster out and I unfolded it and I get up to Aoi and I was so star struck I forgot EVERYTHING I was gonna say. But i saw him look down and see it and he said "oh wow!!! Design?" I couldnt even answer. The staff beside him thought I didnt understand so she said "he asked if you drew this." And i said "ohhh my god. Yes. Yes. Design. Yes." And he looked at me, IN MY EYES with these bright wide eyes and he said "thank you! So cool! Thank you" and he took my hands in his and we looked in each other's eyes and I saw warmth and love and dedication. Im sure he saw pure terror and awe in mine but we said thank you. I slide it down to Reita and i see him look down and his eye we could see through his mask, which up close almost looked like cloth and not plastic, got so big and he has a deeper voice so he just said "WOW!!" AND stared for a second and then he looked at me and said "you draw this??" And I still had no words so I just nodded and said "YES. YES. DRAWING." And we still held eyes and he said "this is amazing!!! Thank you so much!" And he took my hands in his and shook and we said thank you!! Then I slid it down to Ruki and OH MY GOD RUKI WAS PERFECT. From my peripheral i glimpsed aoi and reita following with their eyes. And ruki saw it and his face LIT UP and he said "WOW! YOU DREW THIS?!" And I found my words so I said "yes! Kakimashita! I drew this!!" And he pointed to himself and he smiled and said "I LIKE THIS!!!! I LIKE THIS!!!! THANK YOUU! THANK YOU!!!" and he grasped my hands in his and we shook and said thank you. Then I move to Kai and he says "HI!!!" AND I SAID "HELLO!!!!" and i show him and he SMILES SO BIG and he said "oh wow! A drawing!?" And I said "kakimashita! I drew this!" And he looked at me and said "its amazing!!! Good job!! Thank you!!" And his smile WAS EVEN BIGGER AND HE just MELTED MY HEART RIGHT THERE!!!!!!!!!!! AAHH!!! and he grasped my hands in his and shook and we ssaid thank you to each other and last was MY FAVORITE URUHA and let me tell you. He recently dyedd his hair blonde and I did not like it. It was cut like a bob and it was super "I wanna talk to your manager." Our ongoing joke was to call him Susan. But i saw HIM. AND HIM AND HIS HAIR WAS A FOOT AWAY FROM ME. AND HE LOOKED. BEAUTIFUL. IMMACULATE. I ALMOST HAD THE NERVE TO APOLOGIZE. But I showed him my poster. His reaction was my favorite. His eyes got real big and he said "ooooooooooooooohh!!!! Wow!!!!!!!" And i said "kakimashita!! I drew this!!" And he couldnt even speak he just kept saying "wow!!" And he looked at me and I looked at him and we shook hands and he took my hands in his and he said "thank you so much!" And I said "thank you!!!" And then i don't remember but i think uruha was still super close to me after we let go and i turned away and i think i turned back around and black out yelled "OMG YOURE MY FAVORITE." AND I think he smiled embarassed and said "thank you so much!" And then we tried to fenangle it back into the box and i caught the smallest glimpse of Aoi and Reita leaning over the table to look and see. Eventually we got the plastic on and the staff member said "ill take it." So we handed it over and then I both hand waved and said "BYEEE THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!" AND OH MY GOD ALL 5 OF THEM LEANED OVER AND LOOKED AT ME AND WAVED AND SAID "BYEE THANK YOUU!!" and then they gave us our VIP towels and we were told to scoot so we went down the hallway and out the door!! And that was IT!!!

I. MET. THE. GAZETTE.

This is what I gave to them and Showed them.

I. SHOWED. THEM. MY. ART.

THEY. LLLOOOVVVEEEDDD. MY. ART.

AS MELISSA SAID, "it was a Total Eclipse Of The Art."

MY BIGGEST DREAM CAME TRUE.

#the gazette #ruki #uruha #aoi #reita #kai #personal post #rantings #wt2019 #phase 4 #99.999 #nyc #ps theater #5/6/19

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angrylizardjacket · 5 years

Text

when i said it i thought it was true [3] {Ben Hardy}

A/N: 2973 words. Fake Dating AU.

[part 1] [part 2]

Roger Taylor has barely spoken two words to you since the start of filming, and it’s caused you so much anxiety. Were you disappointing? Did you not look or act accurate enough? Sometimes you catch him watching you when you’re with Ben, the two of you in costume, and he just looks... pensive.

Brian’s nice enough, soft spoken and always kind when he speaks to you, actually mentions that seeing you and Ben together makes him a bit nostalgic, and you’re not quite sure what to make of it.

The day you see the real Amanda, the woman you’re playing, you feel like you’re about to pass out. It’s as if you’ve got a direct look into your future, she could be your mother, though her hair’s just a little lighter than yours, hence the wigs they keep putting you in. She’s incredibly beautiful for her age, but that’s not the most striking thing about her. She cries the first time she sees Rami in costume, and she doesn’t speak to Roger.

The moment she meets you, she has to take almost a full minute, hand covering her mouth as she looks you over. It’s like a test, and all you can do is stand there awkwardly in full costume, watching as she tears up a little.

“What do you think?” Brian asks with a proud smile, and she lets out an incredulous laugh. “It’s a little uncanny, isn’t it?” Nodding, she approaches you, smiling brightly and greeting you warmly.

“Feels like I’ve gone back in time.” She’s surprisingly soft spoken, and she tugs at your collar, straightening it, before she rests her hands on your shoulders. “I’m flattered they’ve got you playing me, dear.” She tells you, and you think you might cry.

She only stays on set for about a week, the week you’re filming on the Garden Lodge set. The two of you are talking before filming starts for the day, you’re trying to glean any information you can that would help bring depth to your character, and Ben joins you. It’s the first time she’s seen him in full costume, and when he presses a kiss to your temple in greeting, her voice dies in her throat. Ben looks confused, concerned as she has to excuse herself.

It keeps happening, something about seeing the two of you in costume, together and sweet, it’s something she can’t stomach. She can talk to Ben normally, even when in costume, but the moment you arrive, and he smiles at you like he does, she feels her heart in her throat.

“I loved Roger, perhaps to my detriment.” She admits, taking a long sip of wine. She’d invited you out to dinner with her before she has to fly back to her family. “And I know what they’re saying in the movie, but he never really loved me.”

When you go to Ben with this information, he’s quiet, before he admits that Roger told him that when they were younger, their relationship was far from the sanitised version that was being presented in the film.

They’d been together for years, and there was no doubt in anyone’s mind that she loved him, and he took her for granted, always assumed she’d be there when he got back from trips and tours, he’d even proposed to her, and yet he’d do any pretty young girl while he was away because he knew he could get away with it. He’d cheated on her, and lied to her, and strung her along because it was easier than letting go.

Roger Taylor can’t bring himself to speak to you; you’re the spitting image of his biggest fault. Perhaps the way they’ve got it in the movie is his attempt at an apology, not that she’d accept.

Something about your relationship with Ben changes after that. It doesn’t feel like a performance, the way it used to, it feels more grounded. Neither of you are sure how to deal with the new information, but when the cast go out for dinner together, he’s got a hand on your knee under the table, and when you’re hanging out in his trailer between scenes, you let yourself fall asleep against him where you’re watching Netflix. The two of you go out with some of the others for the night, and he kisses you as you’re leaving the club together, his hands holding your face so softly, the kiss so surprisingly tender that you don’t even hear the click of the paparazzi’s camera from where they’re hiding around the corner of the building, and when you see the kiss on instagram the next day, you don’t think you care.

“Have you seen my nice, black blouse?” You called, elbow deep in a pile of clean washing on a Saturday morning.

“Which one?” Ben calls back from the shower, and you frown at the clothes before you; you really had meant to fold them sooner.

“The nice nice one, the one I wear for callbacks, you know the one I’m talking about.” And you move to rifle through the closet again, glaring at each piece of clothing as you flip past it.

“You sure it’s here?” The shower shuts off while you’re eyeing off a perfectly fine cream shirt that could serve as a decent replacement if you came to it. “Are you sure it’s not at your place?” He asks, stepping out of his adjoining bathroom wearing only a towel.

“No, I’m pretty sure I came back here after my last callback.” You mused, and you could hear him getting changed behind you as you tried to recall the last time you’d found yourself in the shirt in question.

“This would be easier if you just lived here.” He muses, letting the statement hang in the air. After a beat, you turn to look at him, brow creased as you considered his words. “If you want to, you can.” He offered, standing there in just a pair of jeans, his hair still damp. It might be the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen.

“Are you serious?” Voice quietly hopeful, your expression brightens as he nods, grinning. Blouse forgotten, you cross the room in a few paces, throwing your arms around him. “Really really?”

“‘course I am.” He doesn’t tell you he loves you, but it’s there in the tone, in the way he kisses you, and it’s there when he spends the next twenty minutes helping you look for your shirt, though when you admit you don’t need it for a few days, he suggests breaking in the bed to fill the time.

“It’s the same bed.” You laugh as he flops back on it, coaxing you over.

“Yeah, but it’s ours.”

The wrap party for Bohemian Rhapsody is... a lot. It’s a bit overwhelming; you’re by Ben’s side and everyone wants to talk to him, congratulate him, and they want to talk to you, tell you how beautiful you look. Everyone is everywhere at all times, and the only constant is Ben.

His arm is around your waist when the two of you are standing by the bar, he’s chatting to someone who’s name you’ve forgotten, though you’re pretty sure he’s the second assistant director or something, and you’re trying to communicate to the bartender what you want over the music, leaning over the bar. The moment the bartender finally nods in recognition and scurries off to get your drink, Ben turns, sees your eyes shining bright in the light of bar, and he forgets what he’s saying, just for a moment. The guy he’s talking to leaves, pulled away by someone in the crowd, and you turn, smiling brightly, confusion creasing your brow when you see Ben watching you.

“What?” The bar is in a terrible location, far too close to the band they’ve got set up, but Ben can read your lips well enough in the bar’s fluorescent lights. He shrugs, doesn’t even attempt to answer as the band, not ten feet away, blast their way through a guitar solo. They’re mostly playing classic rock, a few Queen songs here and there of course, and they’re not bad, they’re just loud.

With your drink in one hand, you take his without thinking, weaving through the crowd, his fingers linked with yours. When you find the door to the courtyard, which is significantly quieter, you feel like you can breathe again. The air outside is cool, and you drop Ben’s hand now that you’re not likely to lose him in the crowd, and the two of you find seats to the side by a tall table.

“You don’t have to stay with me all night.” You tell him, resting your head on your arms, watching as he lights up a cigarette. It was a filthy habit, but damn if it didn’t make him look a hot. Hotter.

“I know that, dude,” he pauses, taking a draft and looking, watching all the people talking and laughing and bopping along to the music, “I like your company.” He says it easily but it still has you grinning, and when he catches sight, he grins in return.

He doesn’t leave your side. Not for the rest of the night.

Photographs are being take all night, and when you look back on them, you see you and Ben sitting side by side, his arm around you as you lean into him, laughing, and he grins at something off camera. You see the cast together for a group shot, all smiling brightly, most a little tipsy, and you’re holding Ben’s hand, your linked fingers just visible in a gap between Allen and Lucy. You see the two of you in the background of a shot of Rami looking absolutely ecstatic; you’re fixing Ben’s hair, and he’s giving you such a soft, endeared look that you hadn’t noticed at the time. If you crop it enough to make it your phone background, you don’t feel the need to call attention to it; for reasons you can’t quite articulate, it makes your heart warm.

It’s strange, and the thing that terrifies you is that it doesn’t feel like acting. It’s that grey area you keep finding yourself in, where it feels so familiar, and it’s like swimming upstream to remember that it’s all fake.

The two of you don’t even share a kiss, not even when you’re both tipsy, not even when you lean in to murmur something in his ear, and his answer brings his lips inches from yours. You want to kiss him, to forget that it’s all fake, but he sees you hesitate, and presses a gentle kiss to your cheek. Lips twisting in to a sad smile, you look out at the crowd of coworkers around you, dancing where the band had been replaced with a DJ, and you take another sip of your drink.

You’ve passed tipsy and dived straight into being drunk by the time you’re ready to head home, or well, back to your hotel room, but that required a taxi. Ben’s not much better off, and when you tug him into the back seat with you, he doesn’t argue. He’s the one who tells the driver the hotel they’ve got you all set up in, and you just lean against him, eyes fluttering closed, contentment filling you as he wraps his arm around you.

“I don’t have any makeup wipes!” You gasp into the silence of the hotel elevator. It feels like the most natural thing in the world to head to his room, your arm tucked into his to keep you from swaying in place in the elevator. It might also be that Ben refused to let you be by yourself after you almost face planted getting out of the taxi.

“I’ve got some in case of emergencies.” He assured, fidgeting with his key card before the elevator comes to a stop.

“See, this is why I love you.” The words come so easily that neither of even catch at first as you make your way down the hall. Ben slows once your words have sunk in, and you both realise what you’d said. “I didn’t mean it like that, I’m sorry.” Voice quiet, there’s a sudden sinking sensation in your chest that dampens the whole night for you, but he doesn’t say anything, just opens the door and starts rummaging through his suitcase for the wipes once he’s inside. Once he tosses them to you, he follows it quickly with an oversized shirt to sleep in.

There’s a solid five minute argument about who would sleep on the sofa, both of you trying to give the other one the bed. It takes you yanking a pillow from the bed, laying on the sofa and refusing to move for Ben to concede defeat. The sofa, however, is the single most uncomfortable piece of furniture you’ve ever had the misfortune of trying to sleep on. Sucking up your pride, you clutch the pillow to your chest as you make your way to the edge of the bed. He’s turned away from you, engrossed in his phone.

“Ben?” You ask, and he looks over his shoulder at you, eyebrows raised in question. “The sofa is really uncomfy.” You pouted. With a grin, he shifted, making room for you.

“Holy shit.” Ben looks like he’s just seen a ghost. The two of you are in a nice restaurant in the city, it’s not five stars or anything like that, actually it happened to be your favourite little hole-in-the-wall restaurant with surprisingly good food and excellent service, and you were treating yourselves to a night out before Ben had to step outside to take a call. You didn’t begrudge him, that’s just how life was for the two of you. “Holy shit.” He repeated, and you looked up from your meal with raised eyebrows.

“What’s up?” You ask, and to see the smile spreading slowly over his face has your heart warming. When he meets your eyes, he’s beaming.

“I think I’m going to be in X-Men.” He said quietly, and your fork fell from your hand, clattering against your plate.

“Holy shit.” You echoed, and he laughed a little, taking your hand when you offered it to him, squeezing gently.

The stars seem to shine a little brighter as Ben beams up at them, your hand in his as the two of you walk home. Sure, there’s paperwork, nondisclosure agreements, rehearsals, and a few months until filming actually begins, but Ben’s landed a role in a high-budget action movie, and you’ve never been prouder.

He spends the next few weeks in countless meetings, almost constantly in and out of phone calls with his manager and various producers, and when he’s not filming with Eastenders, he was usually training. He’s barely home, though neither of you are home a lot, you’re busy with your own projects, but when you see each other, he’s elated. You haven’t seen him this excited or motivated about a project before.

Sometimes you miss him. Of course you miss him, you love him after all, he’s your boyfriend and your housemate, and you tell him all of this over dinner and he looks like he wants to say something, like he wants to freeze this moment in time forever, to bottle it up if he could. You’re so proud, and you love him so much, and it’s the most beautiful thing in the world to watch those two parts of you coming together over a microwave dinner.

In the weeks leading up to filming, things change, and you feel like you never see him anymore. It’s not like before, then you were just busy, now he’s all over the country, in meetings and fittings and workshops. He calls, but your bed is so empty and sometimes you just want to come home to him and he’s not there, and he won’t be home until the end of the week. Things are still good and bright when you see each other - he’s always eager to make up for lost time - and you never once doubt how much he cares about you, but you feel... out of sync.

The two of you had fallen asleep not facing each other, but you wake with his arm draped across you, and it feels so familiar, so right, that it stings when you actually come to and realise where you are.

It’s been years since you’d woken up next to him, and you’d forgotten how pretty he is in his sleep. Part of you thinks that’s a good thing, that if you start to remember now you might keep dwelling. Another part of you urges you to go back to sleep; pretend or not, you should savour this moment you’ve missed so dearly. That’s the part that wins.

You expect when you wake again, for him to already be up and moving, as far away from you as possible, but instead you hear a sleep-rough greeting in your ear, and feel his chest firm against your back, his arm still around you where you’ve tucked yourself against him.

It’s not pretend, it feels like history repeating itself, and so you let yourself forget it’s fake for the moment, lean into him just a little and give a sleepy greeting back. Your heart already aches knowing how lonely you’ll feel once either of you move.

“I forgot how nice you smell.” He murmured, and that’s when you feel your heart already beginning to break. Instead of letting yourself crumble, your link your fingers with his hand where it’s slung over your waist.

“I forgot how warm you are; you’re like a furnace.” And you hear him laugh at that as he leans into you too, and let yourself bask in the moment.

the rat pack: @hotspacedeacon @strangeandwonderfulconcepts @itssaje @d-r-e-a-m-catchme @callumidiot @rockandrollandshit @bohorap @pietrorunsforme @sweetfierceimagines @itsjackothy @mhftrs @sherlockiantheatrenerd @softbenhardy @multifandomgirlrandomstuff @virtualsheepeat @smile-nine @i-padfootblack-things @deaconsroger @spookyfrances @holyurlbatman @your-idiotic-excellency

(crossed out means it wouldn’t tag; i’ll try again for the next part, lemme know if you wanna be tagged xx)

#ben hardy #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy x reader #bohemian rhapsody #borhap #bo rhap #roger taylor #brian may #borhap imagine #borhap cast #borhap cast imagine #rami malek #joe mazzello #gwilym lee #when i said it i thought it was true #the angry lizard writes

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blondecarfucker · 5 years

Text

Bed of Roses (Chapter 19)

Roger Taylor x Reader

BoRhap!Roger Taylor x Reader

(god i hope i didnt already use this gif in another chapter)

Fic Summary: It's 1971. You just moved to London to study, and you find a band on a local pub after a bad date. The encounter doesn’t go the way you expect it, and neither does what follows this evening as you try to deal with loving Roger Taylor.

Fic Note: So I’ve had this story in my head for the last three weeks and finally decided to write it down. It’s completely planned. It will have 21 chapters and it’s divided in three acts: Dusk, Night and Dawn. It’s will be a bit angsty in the future, and it will most likely have some smut as well. I hope you guys enjoy it! Tell me what you think about it in the asks/comments/messages. PLEASE REMEMBER THIS IS NOT THE LAST CHAPTER OF THE STORY. If this is your first time stumbling upon Bed of Roses, thank you for stopping by! The rest of the story is in my masterlist, the link is in my bio - can't put the link here or else the post will disappear from the tags.

Chapter's notes: HEY GUYS!!! LONG TIME NO SEE, at least compared to my usual posting schedule. but work has been pretty intense these days, so im really sorry for disappearing :( but IM BACK WITH A LONG ASS CHAPTER and theres only TWO MORE CHAPTERS LEFT TO BED OF ROSES. WTF. it's been about a month since i started and i cant thank you all enough for the support. now im gonna stop talking cause you already have a long chapter to read

Words: like more than 5k my bad

Warnings: SMUT!!! HELL YEAH. also theres probably a bunch of errors cause im not revising this chapter in order to post it tonight, so my bad!!!

ACT 3 - DAWN

"It's the moment night time seems weaker and everything seems easier to figure out"

Chapter 19

"I guess", you answer, without much thought, and you start laughing as you both get up and move to the seats in front of you, so you can be as close as possible, nothing between the two of you. "This is so surreal. I'm having a hard time believing you're really here", you tell him, and his eyes go wide as he answers "Tell me about it", and takes another sip of his beer.

"I come inside this bar, a bit nostalgic because I've moved into a new place, and they're playing fucking Fleetwood Mac of all fucking things", he says, and you laugh at the way he says the name's band, so sarcastic, so ironically annoyed; you didn't know you missed it so much.

"And I think, well, that's a huge fucking coincidence, so I get to the bar and here you are. In that dress, too! I'm actually thinking they dropped something in my drink and I'm talking to an empty chair as I'm having a weird acid trip", he completes, and you're laughing non-stop, his smile widening at your response.

"Maybe they really did drop something in my drink, cause it must be an acid trip, it's too good to be true. Why are you here?" you ask, and he looks confused.

"I live nearby! I still live here, you know. You're the one who moved out. My acid trip theory makes way more sense", he tells you, and his smile gets even wider at your response; you're laughing again.

"You're right", you tell him, and you take a sip of your own drink.

"See!! You're saying I'm right right away! This must be an acid trip. Now tell me, hallucination of Y/N: why are you in London?", he asks, and you give him half a smile, shy.

"I got a job offer at the British Museum. Sorry I didn't tell-", you start apologizing, but you're interrupted by him as he pulls you into a hug. "I'm so happy for you!! You deserve it, more than anyone else", he tells you, letting you go of his arms, but you need to catch a breath before you can say anything else.

Roger's smell of patchouli and cigarettes fills your lungs, and you feel like you're melting on your chair.

You suddenly remember why you were horny most of the time around him.

His fucking smell.

And that was not just it - his jaw was more defined, his hair was shorter and bleached, and you had to stop yourself from running your fingers through them; it was even harder now that he broke the invisible barrier of touch between the two of you, the hug proving to you both that the other one was really there.

You noticed that he was looking at your details in close up, too - your lips, your eyes.

"Thanks, Rog", you answer, and you notice how much you missed saying his nickname to him, his reaction to it - his expression softens as soon as he hears it.

"When did you get here? Why didn't you call me?", he asks, and you give him a half smile. "Less than 24 hours ago. I wanted to call you - I called as soon as I got the job offer. It felt right that you should be the first to know, after everything, you know", you said, and he nodded lightly.

"But you never picked up", you said, and he sighed. "I moved out of our flat a couple months ago", he says. "Yeah, I thought so. But how's everything? How are the boys? The music? Why is your hair so short and bleached? Not that I don't love it, of course", you wink, back at your ironic flirting competition without a second thought.

"It's not that shorter", he says, holding a strand between his fingers and analysing it for a second. "I just thought I'd look better if I was even more blonde. Didn't really think much about it. The boys are doing good - we still fight all the time. But I'm very proud of our new album, don't know if you've heard of it", he said, and you scoffed.

"What do you mean? I've been a Queen fan all along. I bought A Day At The Races and everything. And all I've been hearing in the radios ever since I stepped foot in the UK again is We Are The Champions and We Will Rock You. They're both genius, by the way", you tell him, and he leans closer to you, cupping his own cheek as he puts his elbow on the bar counter.

"I didn't knew you kept paying attention. I always imagined you trying to forget us, trying to pretend we never existed", he said, and you didn't knew if his "we" meant the band or the two of you. Maybe both.

"I tried to avoid it, in the beginning. It was hard for me, and it was even harder cause I knew it all happened because of my choices", you tell him, and he frowns. "Hey, it was my fault, too", he says.

"You did take part in it. But it wasn't all you - it was mostly me, actually. I was unhappy with situations I had little control over, so I accidentally sabotaged our relationship, just to see if I still had control over something", you tell him. "I didn't notice it at the time, but I didn't love myself anymore. You can only give what you have. I couldn't love you properly and treat you right cause I didn't even do that to myself at the time", you complete, and his hand touches yours, intertwining your fingers together.

It didn't feel sexual, but it did felt intimate. He wanted to let you know he was there for you.

"Do you treat yourself properly, now?", he asks, concerned, and you nod. "Yeah. Maybe that's why destiny was nice to us today, bringing us here", you say, pointing your finger around to show your environment. "Cause maybe we can be good to each other now", you completed, and he gave you a half smile.

"I want to be nice with you. I wasn't as much as I could. I was always absent, I barely noticed how much you changed. And once I did, I didn't try to help as much as I just missed the old you. Our ending is on me, too", he says, and you can't help but smile at the situation, how unreal it feels.

"Can we take a walk, Rog? I can't really believe this is all happening. I need fresh air", you tell him, and he laughs ever so slightly. "Sure. You and your walks", he says, and you laugh.

You start walking to a park nearby. The wind is making you shiver, so Roger stops and takes his blazer off to put it on your shoulders, and you open your mouth to protest, about to say he doesn't have to do that, as you did many, many times before. "I know I don't have to, Y/N", he says, "but I want to".

He takes your hand into yours as soon as you start walking again. You smile as you realize it's almost as if you've never left, but it's also way better than it was before you left.

You don't regret leaving. If you didn't leave, you wouldn't be having this moment with Rog.

"So you did buy A Day At The Races...", he starts, swinging your arms in an almost childish manner. "Yeah...", you answer, and he turns his face so he can look at you. "Is my song still your favourite from the album?", he asks, and you laugh.

"Of course, Rog. Drowse is actually my favourite song of yours, even though I'm In Love With My Car will always hold a special place in my heart", you answered, and he laughed.

"So full of yourself, Y/N, just because you helped me record engine sounds", he told you, ironically, and you scoffed. "Hey, it's my favourite cause it reminds me of what we did after we recorded stupid engine sounds", you told him, and he smirked.

"I'm not sure if I remember that. Maybe you'll have to remind me", he said, winking, and you laughed.

You arrived at the park, and Roger sat on a bench as you sat on the grass. He looked at you, confused.

"C'mon, Rog. This way we can watch the stars", you told him, and he scoffed as he sat by your side.

"Sure, Brian", he told you, and you hit his shoulder playfully. "I miss the boys, too. Heard John had a baby", you told him, and he nodded. "Yeah, it's a beautiful kid. Reminded the rest of us how bad we are at relationships and families", he said, and it was your turn to laugh.

"It's okay. We all are. Deacy and Veronica are the exception", you told him, laying down. You took his hand into yours as he laid by your side.

"What are you up to, Y/N? I guess you still like fucking Fleetwood Mac", he said, jokingly. "Yeah, I went to their Madison Square Garden concert before coming here", you tell him, and he laughs. "Of course you did. What else?". "The Runaways", and you can see in your peripheral vision as he nods. "They're good", and you turn to the side, so you can watch him.

"Already back at analyzing my music taste, Taylor?", you ask, and he laughs, turning to the side so he can face you. "Well, it's been a while ever since I had the chance to do it. I need to make up for the lost time", he answers, and you shake your head.

"You're an asshole", you tell him, jokingly. "But yeah, I really like some of their stuff, like Cherry Bomb and You Drive Me Wild. There's also Blondie, who'll always have my heart, Debbie being a fellow new yorker, even though she's a new yorker by choice", you start telling him, but you stop once you notice he blushed.

"Roger Taylor, why are you blushing?", you ask, and it clicks once he scratched his head and looked away. "Well...", he started, but then went quiet. You didn't need him to say anything else. "Oh my God. You had an affair with her, didn't you?", and the look in his eyes answers for him.

"I can't believe it, you lucky bastard!", you tell him, and he frowns. "What, you're not jealous?" he asks, and you scoff. "Of course not. I couldn't expect you to stay pure and chaste after we broke up. You had no obligation to be, nor you were ever pure or chaste to begin with", you say, and he laughs. "Also, I'd try to have an affair with Debbie, if I ever had the chance, too. So I understand you", you tell him, and he smirks. "That would be hot", he says, and you slap his chest.

"Such a cliche fetish, Taylor. I expect better from you", you tell him, and he laughs again. "Sorry to disappoint you", he says.

And you stay there, laying in the grass with Roger by your side as you update each other in your lives - he tells you all about Freddie and Mary, and Brian and Chrissie. It seemed as if everyone from the old days but Veronica went away. And he asked you about your work, and New York, and if you still lived on the Upper East - he smiled once you told him you've moved out. He told you about the time he went to the Met last year, hoping to get to see you, and you were shocked when you realized you actually did see him outside as you went out to get lunch, but you couldn't believe it was him, since you were used to seeing him everywhere, knowing it wasn't really him. You were happy once he told you he liked to go to museums now. And once the birds start tweeting around you, and the sky becomes a lighter shade of blue, nearly lilac, you realize you've been talking for hours.

You've never felt so exposed to someone - he knew about your worst side, the saddest moments of your life, the most pathetic choices you've made - ones that hurt him - yet he was still there, laughing with you, interested in every word you said, caressing your arm over his blazer. You felt like you could be completely honest with him - he'd understand.

"Do you want to go?", Roger asks as he takes a strand of your hair and puts it behind your ear.

You look down to his lips, feeling the warmth coming from his body, his hands so close to your lips, your cheeks. You want to feel him against you again, and you think he'll be fine with that.

"Not really. Not now. Do you know what I really want, at the moment?", you ask, and he nods a "no".

"I want you to kiss me", you whisper, and he gives you a coy little smirk as he looks to your lips. "I can do that", he says, leaning in to kiss you.

And the feeling of his lips against yours, light and airy, made something inside you wake up - something you didn't notice was gone for long, but now that it's here again, you can't believe how long it's been ever since it was present. An extraordinary feeling.

You didn't feel complete - you felt complete alone, with yourself. Roger made you more than complete - he made you pour over your edges. He was like the sun - everything with him was brighter, better, more alive, more intense. He gave things the right perspective - not a new perspective, the right perspective. Everything was just better.

Especially you.

After a few moments kissing lightly, still getting used to each other's lips again, Roger kisses your cheek and whispers, his breath leaving goosebumps on your skin. "Do you know what I want?", he asks, his forehead against yours, and you nod lightly. "I want to go home with you", he tells you, and you smirk.

"I can do that", you retort, and he laughs a little as he gets up, offering you a hand. "Mademoiselle", he says, with an affected accent, and you take his hand.

You stroll along the sidewalk, still holding hands, as Roger looks for a passing cab. You just watch, and the sunlight makes his features look more real - he looked too much like an angel, a hallucination, when you were talking at night. Now he was here, a real person, by your side, looking for a cab so he could take you home - so casual, such a thing normal people do, you were sure you couldn't hallucinate with that. When you daydreamed of Roger, even before you started dating him, it was never this type of casual stuff. Now you understand that these simple moments together are what really makes you care about him so much.

He turns the key to open the door to his new place, but before he pushes it open, he turns to you.

"It's a bit empty… Not every new piece of furniture is here already", he tells you, and you nod. "I get it. My flat is mostly boxes, at the moment".

He pushes the door open and the first thing you feel is the sunrise on your eyes, the sun warming up your skin.

You take off his blazer as you get inside, and you can feel his eyes on you as your eyes adjust to the light. You put the blazer on a chair as you walk closer to the other side of the living room, where the entire wall was glass, giving you a perfect view of River Thames and its bridges, looking magical as the sun glimpsed from the horizon.

"This is amazing, Rog", you tell him, and he says "Yeah, it's a pretty nice view" from behind you, checking you out. You walk to him and playfully hit him. "Back at your old ways, I see", you say, and he smirks.

"Only if you let me" he says, and you laugh. You wonder if it's not weird that you're both barely questioning if you should do this - go back to each other's arms so quickly - but you shake the thought out of your mind. You sabotaged this relationship enough, you hurted Roger and yourself enough. Now you decide to just deal with things as they come - if right now, the two of you are interested in being together again, even if it's just now, so you will be.

"I will", you answer him, and a smile appears on his lips as your hands move to his hair, your attention now focused on how it will feel on your hands.

But then the phone rings.

"Oh, for fuck's sake", Roger complains, and you're divided between being annoyed and laughing at his response. "I'll be back in a minute", he says, turning around and walking to the phone.

He answers the phone, his voice visibly annoyed firing quick responses to whoever was on the other side of the line. "I know. I'll be there. Now you said I had the week off, so pretend I don't exist until it's over", he says, and then turns it off.

You're still where you were when he went to pick up the phone, but it felt a bit weird to just go back to it - the phone call ruined the mood.

Roger knew that. So he just smiled and shrugged, saying "I can't even have a week off without the label calling me this hour in the morning", and you give him a half smile. Instead of walking straight towards you, he stops by the record player, looking for something in the boxes on its side, until he finds what he's looking for.

You recognize what's playing, and it's something you wouldn't expect from Roger. It was Bob Marley and The Wailers new album, Exodus - Turn Your Lights Down Low, to be more specific.

You chuckled as he walked closer to you. "Didn't knew you liked reggae, Mr Taylor", you told him, and he laughed. "Are you judging my music taste, Y/N? I thought you were better than this", and he offered you a hand, taking you into his arms so you could sway your bodies to the rhythm of the song. "Also, it's a pretty appropriate song, if you pay attention to the lyrics", he said, and you did so as he started to whisper them on your ear, giving you goosebumps.

"I kept this message for you, girl

But it seems I was never on time

Still I wanna get through to you, girlie

On time, on time

I want to give you some love, good, good lovin'"

His lips went down to your neck, but you wanted to kiss him after hearing those words coming out of his mouth in his husky voice, so you entangled your fingers on his hair and pulled his lips into yours.

This kiss was more rough, it wasn't romantic as the last one in the park. This one was needy - you tried telling him how much you missed him on it, and so did he. You felt his shoulders under your hands as his hands went straight to your bum.

You chuckled against his lips as he pressed you to the wall, but once you felt cold glass against your back, you pushed him back, slightly. He looked confused.

"Don't want to test how much your window can take or flash your new neighbours, do we?", you ask, and he smiles. "If it's with you, I wouldn't mind, really", Roger tells you, but he guides you to his room anyway.

"The bed is not here yet, but the mattress already is", he says, and you nod. "Guess I really won't have an option but flashing your neighbours", you point to the window. "Hey, it's a pretty tall building. No other building around us is tall enough to really see what's happening here. Just the sun, the birds and the Thames", he says, grabbing you by your waist back into a kiss.

This one's a bit slower, more in sync with the music coming from the living room. You start to unbutton his shirt, sliding it off his arms. You break the kiss so you can look at him, his torso more defined than before. "I missed you", you tell him, kissing him again, and his eyes flicker to your chest for a moment before he mumbles an I missed you too against your lips.

You moaned when the feeling of his tongue massaging yours was combined with his thumbs brushing against your nipples over the dress. He groaned in response, and one of your hands that were on his neck went to cup his jaw, and you could feel the stubble under your fingers.

He moves his kisses to you neck as you recover your breath, playing with your earlobe as your breathing hitched. He pressed his nose against your skin. "You smell so good. I couldn't remember it, sometimes", he told you, and you smirked. "Did you think about me a lot?", you ask, and he moves away from your neck so he could look into your eyes. "When I was alone, you were usually the one I'd think about", he said, and you blushed.

This seemed to turn him on even more, as he unzipped the back of your dress and pulled it down, the chiffon making a ruffling sound as it hit the floor. Roger kicked his shoes and socks away as he kissed your cleavage, his lips leaving a fiery trace wherever they touched your skin. "God, you're so sexy", he said, pulling you closer by the hip as one of his hands slipped your bra strap off your shoulder, pulling the lace off from one of them as he cupped it.

You move your head back as you moan when his thumb repeats the movement on your nipple, but this time with no fabric between them. He moves his hands to your back and unclasps your bra, sliding the other strap off your shoulders and throwing the bra to the side.

He gets on his knees as he moves his wet kisses down to your stomach, and then closer to your underwear, and you get ready for him to take it off, but he doesn't, moving his hands to your ankles and moving them to the side, which makes you open your legs a bit wider. You hold onto his hair, a smirk on his lips as you do so, and he starts kissing the inner part of your things, and you groan, annoyed that he's teasing you.

But he's actually helping you take your shoes off, and you smile as you realize that. Once you kick your scarpins away, he strokes the sides of your legs until he reaches the elastic band of your lace underwear. He pulls it down slowly, moving his kisses to your lower stomach as they fall off and you kick them away.

You make an annoyed sound when he breaks away from you to take you to his "bed", the mattress on the ground. You lean into the pillows as he's on top of you again, and your annoyed to feel the fabric of his trousers against you. "You're wearing too many clothes", you complain, and he smirks. "Just a minute, okay, babe?", he says, and you can't hold a genuine smile at the sound of your old nickname.

He notices that, pinching your cheeks ironically before going back to kissing you. He doesn't take long before nibbling your lower lip and then moving his kisses back to your breasts, stimulating one with his thumb on one of your nipples while kissing the other. You can't help but moan.

Roger then slides the hand from your breasts to your sides, moving it down to your core, stroking you. You groan, and you groan again even louder as he starts massaging your clit. "You're so wet, already", he says, and you smirk at him, almost challenging him. What are you going to do about it? you seem to ask, raising your brow.

And he breaks contact with him, making your eyes narrow as you frown, only for them to get wide as his big, callous hands separate your thighs and his lips take the place where his fingers were moments before.

"Fuck, Roger", you moan, his tongue massaging your clit as he slides two fingers inside you. "God, Rog", you say, as he continues his movements. You're pulling at his hair to keep him where he was.

After a few minutes, you pull harder at his hair, and he starts to pump his fingers faster on you. He moans against you as you keep saying his name, and the buzz from it makes you vibrate. That's enough to send you over the edge, and he breaks away from you after your first orgasm that morning.

He licks his lips as he wraps his arms around you, still shaking from your orgasm. "You taste so good, Y/N. I also missed the way you scream my name, even though it's early in the morning. I'm happy to wake my neighbours up to this", he says, but you recovered your breath, and you want to do something you missed, too. So you turn him over so you can now be on top of him, and you kiss him, very roughly, grinding against him and feeling him hard under you.

"Told you you're wearing too many clothes", you said as he groaned. You kept riding him with his pants still on, just to tease him, as you left love marks on his skin. You missed it.

But you wanted to feel him against your tongue again, so you got off his lap and unzipped his pants, pulling them down along with his underwear as he sucked a breath. You felt like you teased him enough, but as you positioned yourself, you stroked him a few times, earning more moans from him, but nothing compared to the way he said your name as you moved your lips down on him, pressing a kiss to the tip before taking him completely into your mouth.

You loved the feeling of control having him inside your mouth always gave you, his taste on your tongue as he tugged on your hair to help you find a rhythm. You watched as one of his hands let go of you to tug on the bedlinen by the side of your head.

It was only a few minutes after you started when he pulled you away and onto his lips again. "I was about to come. I want to shag you properly before I can come, babe", he said, giving you a quick peck before turning you over so he's on top of you now.

"Sure, Rog", you say, giving him a peck back. "Can you go slow? It's been a while, at least for me. A few months", you shrug, and he gives you a soft smile.

"So guys in New York weren't that interesting, then?", he asks, and you smile. "Not that much. Nothing remarkable, really. And plain nothing ever since I found out I'd be moving here again", you told him, and he smiled. "I'll make your wait worth it", he said, and you smile. "You already did. This is gonna be a bonus", you told him.

You wrapped your legs around him, giving him free access to you while pulling him closer, and you moan at the same time once he starts to get inside you slowly, bottoming out and staying there for a few seconds.

"God, Y/N", he says, and the way he says your name drives you crazy - his beautiful voice almost sang it to your ears. He started moving slowly, so you could adapt to his size again, and soon he picked up a faster pace, closing his eyes when he cursed, looking down to watch your breasts bounce at his movements, leaving marks on your butt cheeks as he gripped on them.

It wasn't long before you had your second orgasm with him, crying out his name, which only made his movements faster - he was close again.

You watched his muscles popping under his skin as he thrusted, and you wanted to make him hit his high as soon as possible, since he did it for you twice today. "Fuck, Rog, you feel so good", you told him, and you could see the veins in his neck popping, his jaw clenching. "Come for me, Roger", you said, and he pushed into you once more, collapsing over your body later. You ran your fingers through his hair as he recovered his breath, feeling a thin layer of sweat covering your bodies.

"God, I've missed you", he told you, pressing a kiss to the curve of your neck.

You woke up, the afternoon light blinding you for a few seconds. But even once your eyes adjusted to it, you were confused about your surroundings.

Then you remember everything - Roger.

You're in his new place, and even though he's not in bed with you, you can still feel him around you - his smell, the feeling of him inside you.

You get up and pick his button up off the ground, almost second nature - you used to do it all the time. Once you get out, Roger is paying a delivery guy only in his boxers.

"Y/N! You're awake!" he smiles, shaking the delivery guy's hand a goodbye and closing the door, and you smile back at him. "Yeah, it's been a pretty long night", you told him, and he left the paper bag with the delivery on top of the table before pulling you into a hug, pressing a kiss on top of your head. "Love these long nights that turn into quite long mornings. It's 2pm, so good afternoon, sunshine, and I got us lunch", he told you, leading you to the table.

"Great, I'm starving", you told him, and he got sushi trays out of the bag. "Nice choice. Didn't think your taste for sushi would continue for so long", you told him, already eating.

"Didn't ever think I'd share sushi again with you", he shrugged, and you smiled. "Y/N, where are we?", he asked, and you frowned.

"I have no idea. I tried not to overthink us for the last few hours, but you're right. Maybe we should talk about this", you said, pointing your finger to the both of you.

"I love you, still", he said, simply, and you smiled. "I love you too, Rog. I never stopped loving you - we just needed time so we could figure our lives, maybe?", you asked, and he nodded.

"Yeah, but I'm afraid to rush things now and ruin everything. But I also don't want this fear to stop me from being with you, if I want to", he said, and you agreed.

"Maybe we should just do the stuff we want to, no strings attached, no names given for what we are. We'll just go with it, at least for now", you said, and he agreed.

"Yeah, about that. I have the next week off before I need to go promote News Of The World, and it will be a month before I'm back here in London again. Then we have the launch party and three weeks of rehearsing before tour", he told you, and you knew he wanted to compare schedules, know how long you might have together. It happened before, many times.

"I only start working next Monday", you said. It was a Sunday, almost eight full days before you had to work.

"So we have a free week. I thought about what you just said now, and I have an idea", he said, a devilish smirk on his lips, the one you knew so well, and you raised a brow. "Enlighten me, then", you told him.

"You just talked about doing the stuff we want to, just going with it, stuff like that, right? So, at the moment, I just really want to take you to Paris and spend the week with you there", he told you, and you choked on your food.

He laughed as he helped you drink some sake to get the food down. "So, do you want to go?", he asked, and you thought about it, still red from the incident.

Your natural instinct was to say no - you had to unpack your stuff, and adapt or whatever, before work. But his question - do you want to go instead of can you go - made you reconsider.

You wanted to go, so you nodded. "Sure", you said, and then laughed. Life took the most unexpected turns with you, sometimes.

"Really? Great!! I can drive you to your new place so you can pack before we go to the train station and just hop on the next train to Paris", he said, excited, pulling you in for another hug, and then moving his hands to cup your face. "I just thought it could be fun if we went some country none of us really know and discover it together. Also, it's pretty romantic, so lots of opportunities to get you turned on", he winked, and you laughed.

As you felt his fingers brush against your cheeks, you remembered something you wanted to ask, and took one of his hands into your own so you could look at it. "Rog, your hands have always been pretty callous because of the drumsticks, but now the fingertips are, too. Why?" you asked, and he shrugged. "I've been playing the guitar a lot, recently", he said, and you opened your mouth in shock.

"No way! I need to see it", you told him, and he smiled. "Sure. Right after I take a shower, I'll take you to meet my Fender. Then you can help me pack before we go to your place", he told you, pressing a kiss on your lips. "Thank you. Really, thank you", he said, and you smiled. "Thank you, Rog. I was scared you'd hate me, sometimes. Now go take that shower before I join you and we never get on a train to Paris", you told him, turning him around and slapping his ass, playfully.

As you heard the shower and Roger's singing as he showered, you walked to the window, taking in the view.

You were back in London, and back with Roger.

And you couldn't be happier.

---

Chapter 20

Masterlist

Taglist:

@taylorroger-s @sarai-ibn-la-ahad @its-nessi @anamcg317 @frenchieswiftie @queen-danielle-dani-dan @minihemo @shutup-sorry @theyrealllegends @killerqueenisthebest @ashagracelove @hardy-s @fuckinghurricanesoul @secretsweetscollectionblog @mrswinterhater @11mb0 @tamtam-go92 @derptatosaur @brianandthemays @phantom-fangirl-stuff @the-hysterical-queen @rogerofmylife @notevenlxvely @discodeakyy @x1975sos @16wiishes @jennycidesstuff @partydulce @melros-e @onevisionliz

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just-some-random-blogger · 5 years

Text

Wheel Of Fortune

EXO Park Chanyeol x Reader + others Characters: EXO Summary: Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Chanyeol was head over heels for you but he was 100% in denial that you liked Kyungsoo. Word Count: 1k+ Warnings: CRACK FOOL. RUN IF YOURE NOT HERE FOR THAT, jealousy, bottled emotions, fluff ending, etc.

A/N: this was TOO FLUFFY tbh. i wanted to hurt myself but it turned into fluff but oh well

let’s start at the beginning

your parents were introduced by mutual friends and started talking on the phone

okay kidding that’s too far

right

so you worked at SM

and is the maknae of a seven member coed group that debut a year after BigBang and a year before SHINee

(so 2007)

which considering the fact you were younger than Sehun by a couple of months meant you debuted at 10

just roll with it cos ITZ MY VERY SPECIFIC PLOT DMMIT

wheLP

the members were all exactly one year apart and the members from eldest to youngest,, the sequence was a guy (@ 30 yrs old), a girl (29), a guy (28), a girl (27), a guy (26), a guy (25), then you (24).

I KNOW I DONT NEED THIS BUT THIS IS HOW I IMAGINED THIS PLOT IT DMMIT

since you were basically a sunbae at SM even tho u were a smol child you wanted to show your support to your hoobaes

So a day before their debut as a whole group, you, along with the eldest member of your group, who was the leader, visited EXO in the dance studio and gave moral support

You were A BIG FAN and it showed

not that you were hiding it in the first place

your leader was HIGH KEY embarrassed by you, but low key thought it was kinda cute how excited you were for this song

so dUH EXO dances growl for you

anD YOU NEARLY SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST BECAUSE OF HOW PERFECT EVERYTHING WAS

Luhan’s voice

Baekhyun’s attitude

Sehun’s resting bitch face

eeeerrrrrthing

YOU WERE ON THE FLOOR SCREAMING

literally

and Junmyeon thought you were adOrAbLE

“I think she malfunctioned,” your leader gave a face and pushed you on the shoulder to see if you were still breathing as you let out a silent scream

“CAN YOU GUYS DO IT ONE MORE TIME”

?????

Jongin was too out of breath to fight you

but lol u know what

they did dance again for you

BECAUSE YALL HAD THE CUTEST LIL FACE AND YOU WERE LIKE 16 SO

after that your band and exo were pretty much in one group

like hella tight

you were bsicly conjoined twinss

You could be at an award show and your table would be abandoned because you decided to sit with exo or vice versa

HYPING EACH OTHER WAS NOT EVEN HYPE ANYMORE BECAUSE IT WAS LIKE YOU GUYS WERE RABID OR SOMETHING WTF

!!!!CALM!!!!!DOWN!!!!

like you + your group to them:

“thtAS MY CHILd!”

“DID YOU SEE YIXING AND HIS HIPS FUCK YOU BITCH!”

“HE WAS RUDE. THAT WAS RUDE. THAT’S NOT ALLOWED”

“GET OFF THE STAGE SLUT”

“WWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP BITCH!”

“~~~that was sooooooo sOFYT”

“CHEN STFU! YOU NEED TO STOP USING THAT DAMN VOICE OF YOURS JONGDAE. THATS ILLEEEEEGAL!”

“myY HERT!”

“OPPA *cries in korean* PLESS!”

“WHAT IS THIS FUCKERY!!!!!?“

‘iN fRonT oF MY sALaD”

“PA$$ THE H01Y W4T3R”

“NO KAI. BAD KAI. STTOOOOPPPP.”

you @ baekyun

baekyun @ you

thIS IS A CHANYEOL HEADCANON BUT I LOOK AT THIS FUCKIN MORON WHO I HATE SO MUCH SOMEONE SAVE HIM FROM HIS IDIOCY

them to you + your group:

“first of all fuck, second FUCK”

“wh-- whT WHAS THAT HIP MOVEMENT. U ARE 4 YRS OLD”

“HE did t h a t.”

“NOOOOOONNNNNNNNNAAAAA ch0k3 me”

“I CANT HEAR YOU OVER U BEING SUCH A HOE”

“i cant beLIEVE THIS STADIUM IS SO QUIET” *ears are actually bleeding*

“NOt TODaY S4T4N”

“I DIDNT ASK FOR THIS”

“how does this have 300M views????? ONLY 300M I--”

“GAAAAAHHHHH WHAT WAS THAT MOVE WHT WAS IT”

“my soul has been touched”

“this is TOOOOOOOO much ma lord”

“DID YOU JUST RIP YOUR SHIRT OFF?“

“TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF!”

“ASDFRTYUJM ive been shot”

ya dig

it’s not verbal abuse if they can’t hear you cause of the bass and the fact your on stage performing

but like

you guys did everything together

practiced

ate

shopped

toured

pranked

T O G E T H E R

like who else in SM mattered

SHINee who?

JK YOUWERE A SHAWOL THROUGH AND THROUGH

you reassure Minho everytime unless you wanted to die that day

YOu EVEN FANGIRLED OVER TAEMIN’s MOVE WITH MINSEOK

BUT YOU OBVI you had MORE THAN ENOUGH ROOM TO BE AN EXO-L and an elf and a cassie and a so-won and DONT FOrget a vip and a---

you get the point

ANYWAY

as you were close with everyone you had a special bond with every individual

YALL STILL TEXT WITH YA BOY KRIS

yOU WENT ON A SHOW IN CHINA WITH LUHAN

TAO LEAVES PUKE COMMENTS ON YOUR INSTA POSTS

my ot12

and as much as you say you are equally close with everyone

errbody knows that be bull the size of russia

yall caNNOT dENy that you and chanyeol have the same crack powder on your philtrums

LIKE KYUNGSOO CANNOT LIVE WHEN YOU TWO ARE TOGETHER

LET HIM LIVEEEEEE

this moment must never die

ya boy be mindin his own business then

BAM BITCH

you and chanyeol be makin D.O. cray af

rest assured he HAS thought of how he’d kill both of you

ANd that’s why chanyeol loves you

like he decided he liked you the moment you lost your breath laughing when he threw a rubber duck at Kyunggsoo’s head, making it squeak in the most demented way no one thought possible

but he knew he loved you when you helped him lighten up on one of his dark days

you had that kind of effect on people

i mean all you did was sit down with him, both of your backs leaned up against each other’s, head occasionally leaning against the other’s head or shoulder, and played some nothings on the guitar and ukulele

but that was more than enough

you were there with him

and that’s what mattered

But literally the moment he accepted his feelings for you

he began to notice something he felt 100000% dumb for not seeing before

the way you laugh when Kyungsoo says a lame-ass joke

the way you always hug him from behind

you did that with literally everyone you were close with sure,

but Chanyeol noticed you did it with him more

and he 3

there was also the way you were just always winding up next to Soo when he was around, like he had some sort of magnet on him

and how you just liked poking his cheeks, begging him to show his dimples

which were really faint like gurl--

chANYEOL HAD DIMPLES TOO

CHANYEOL HAS DIMPLES

why daheq did you like his close to nonexistent ones?????????

????????

okay you liked poking Lay’s dimples more

look at my boy, who i love with burning passion ANDWILL DESTROY SM FOR BECAUSE HE JUST WANTS TO BE WITH HIS BAND SM SM SM!!!!! CHINA KOREA POLITICS FK ALL YALL

and suho

and chen

anD FINE--

yeah you did poke his too

literally anyone who remotely has dimples tbh

BT WHY KYUNGSOO

ads;ajsd;lasjdkas #jelly

so chanyeol decides to ask someone about it

so he obviously goes to his wisest hyung

but the day he wants to talk to Suho, YOU WERE ON A DATE WITH HIM

like a date but not a date date he could tell

BUT A DATE NONETHELESS AND HE WAS KINDA JELLY

so he goes to Baekhyun for some fucking reason

and he’s like “omg u like her i couLDnt FUCKING TELL FROM ALL THE HEARTS IN TH AIR”

instant regret

but like Baek did give him some advice

like 5% was advice

the other 99% was him screaming to just be a man and tell her

so chanyeol is like, “STFU.... also she likes kyungsoo so fml”

and for a hot second Baekhyun has nothing to say

BAEKHYUN HAS NOTHING TO SAY

“idek dude. this is why i flirted with her openly”

Chanyeol punched him for saying that

but he decides he’s going to tell you after like 231109 years

cos Jongdae said you don’t like Kyungsoo and that he’s sure of it

Chanyeol asked how he was sure and he was just all like

“she had a crush on Sungmin hyung before and DID NOT act like that at all.”

That made Chanyeol a lot more hopeful

So he just went for it

and asked if you wanted to get lunch

and then after eating, you guys walked back

and he just sort of blurted it out

“Joahaeyo.”

you just looked at him and chuckled, “Thank you. I like you too, Yeolie.”

bitch are you for real rn

before Chanyeol could clarify, your walking slowed, “I’ve known for a while now.”

wait

w h a t

“Minseok oppa told me.”

?????????? uhm HOW DID HE KNOW

Chanyeol’s hands were waterfalls atm, “Why did he tell you?”

Your face starts burning red and chanyeol cant help but think of it as a bad sign

“I told him I liked him...”

“... and he said he can’t reciprocate because he knows you like me, and that he can’t do that to his dongsaeng.”

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

cool story bro

you liked someone in EXO that was NOT him

cool cool cool

I GUESS CHEN WAS RIGHT

THANKS

wait did that mean chanyeol was this obvious

wait did that mean chanyeol ruined your chances with his hyung

wait was this why you cried that one time

WaiT WAS THIS WHY YOU HUNG AROUND KYUNGSOO

BECAUSE WHENEVER MINSEOK WAS IN THE ROOM, YOU WOULD GET KINDA STIFF AT A POINT AND KYUNGSOO MAKE A JOKE TO MAKE YOU LAUGH

WASTHIS WHY YOU TWO HUNG OUT MORE

WHY HADN’T HE NOTICED

AND IF EVERYONE ELSE DID

WHY DIDNT THEY TELL HIM

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chanyeol frowned and called out your name, proceeding to apologize

“Wae? why are you sorry? did you tell minseok to say that to me?“

he couldn’t feel mushy and weird at what you said

“YA dont tell me youre going to be weird around me too. It’s bad enough Minseok oppa distanced himself a bit.”

Chanyeol couldn’t help but be angry, sad, protective, and annoyed all at once at what you just admitted to him

“I’ll tell him to stop.”

You pouted, “you don’t have to tell anyone anything, chanyeol.”

“yes but you don’t deserve to feel awkward around anyone.”

“yes but that was minseok oppa’s choice.”

“yes but he was only doing that because he’s my hyung and he’s dumb.”

“yes but--

OU KNOW WHAT WHY DONT WE ALL JUST BE AWKWARD AROUND EACH OTHER”

and so you walked forward fast and tried to ignore chanyeol

Chanyeol, with his freakishly long legs caught up with you though

he caught your arm

“What tf are you doing?“

“Ew dont talk to me its awkward. im awkward. your awkward.”

Chanyeol laughed. “yaaaaa, why do i like you?

“THAT’S WHAT IM THINKING HO”

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