#the best I can say is to think of the questions bsd offers you and reread the series at any chance | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hopefull-mindset · 3 months

Note

Lately I've been thinking about the current progression of the story, obviously we are nowhere near the ending, however, what are your thoughts towards how the main story is going to end?

Based on what we know so far how do you think what do you think the climax and the resolution the story is going to be? Because so far it seems like it's going to be something related to the book, but there's so many plot points and characters that we haven't even really touched on yet and I'm wondering if we ever will (for example the order of the clock tower was this just a one and done thing or are we getting more on that Asagiri????)

I am SO sorry. I got sick on the weekend I was thinking of answering this. Then I got completely stuck on what I wanted to say because honestly I have no idea where this series is going besides a few things I know Kafka Asagiri wouldn't leave behind. I have faith in him and I feel like him pulling along Nathaniel Hawthorn for this long into the story and knowing when Fitzgerald would have involvement proves he doesn't forget about his previous storylines.

I see complaints sometimes about how Steinback’s side plot with the Guild is never touched on again and it's like?? Because there's already so much going on already?? I'm personally impressed with how Asagiri handles this bunch of characters and that's why I'm not impressed with complaints about the female characters getting “no” screentime. I think some of you really need to reread the manga because, of course, it would feel that way if you needed to split it between all these characters and have a smaller amount of female characters compared to guys.

It's an ongoing story so treat it like an ongoing story. Some criticisms I see of BSD really feel like they're in bad faith and don't give it any grace. To me, that's really depressing. I don't know what some of you even want from him. I'll move on now to your actual question.

This is a character-driven story with hmm, well I shouldn't say it doesn’t have a clear plotline because the antagonists have a clear goal for The Book, but it's not a story where the protagonist is driven to do anything besides overcome himself. I have ideas on what future plotlines would look like, but not all of them.

There are things that are absolutely going to be followed up on. Like how 55 Minutes’s story was left on a mystery to be explored in a future arc. 55 Minutes was very involved in the Great War and Europe, so I’m guessing some of that will be explored in due time. I’m not very good at guessing so I’m not the best to be asked on theorizing that far into the future.

How about I just speak on the present arc? I think that will be easier and it's good to work with the pieces we have. The ending is much too far into the future for me to come up with anything, really. This series is much too technical with its reference and motivations to say anything other than, “We should expect this stuff in the light novels to play into the story later.”

Since I gave myself some time to think this over, there are some things I am completely sure of having a critical role in the present and future of this story—besides the obvious lasting effects of the Great War and the storm Verlaine mentioned waiting for very much having to do with the Clock Tower’s eventual involvement.

I’ve been thinking about them a lot and I hadn’t realized this was my chance until now! So exciting! I mean these two tend to cross over for me.

55 Minutes is the 4th light novel in this series. Anyone who has read it loves it because of the focus on world building and getting to follow Atsushi for once in novel form. I went into it thinking that it was going to be a quick, self-contained story that happens a bit after the guild arc, but I was shocked to see that there were so many questions unanswered! On purpose obviously to set up a plot line for the future, but man.

While I am excited for many things from the light novels to be answered in the main story, I want to bring attention to the main antagonist. The living ability of Jules Gabriel Verne AKA Gab. Verne was a part of The Seven Traitors, a group that committed itself to stopping the war by any means necessary. They were what the Armed Detective Agency is to Atsushi for him. His ability (The Mysterious Island) absorbed other users’ abilities, so long as they were on an island he claimed as his domain.

By the time the war had ended, he was alone again and the rest of the members were either dead and disappeared. Verne decided to stay and maintain the Standard Island so his friends had a place to come back to. Fourteen years pass and a deadly weapon called Annihilation and it's maker, H.G. Wells, came onto the island. Annihilation had been stolen from her and Verne agreed to help her get it back from the terrorists under the name “Gab”. The terrorist in question being the colonel, not to be confused with the character of the same title who was an executive to the Port Mafia.

This colonel had actually been the former leader of the group who had called themselves Mimic after being abandoned by their country and had heard his men drifted to Yokohama, only to die there in vain. I wonder if that connects to anything that happened in another light novel, wink wink.

It wasn’t hard for Verne to find where it was hidden, but next he had to come up with a way to get it back without using his ability. He decided to join the thieves that had snuck onto the island by turning himself into a teenager and asking to be the pupil of the boss so he could borrow his ability to go through walls. It had worked as planned, until Wells was hit by a stray bullet and died. He was devastated that he couldn't save this one woman.

His solution to save her was to absorb her ability (Time Machine) to go back 55 minutes in time to reverse what had happened. That worked, but then he thought of another thing: if he absorbed her ability again, couldn't he go further back in time to get a better result? Wells’s ability has the condition that it could only send a person back in time once, but by absorbing it again, he can ignore it as if he were using it for the first time. He regretted how many of the colonel's soldiers had died and he never learned his motivations in the end.

He was right, but creating the perfect future is almost impossible because of how someone always gets hurt in the process. Every time he succeeded, there was only the “what if?” hanging over him that this wasn't enough. The more he used the ability, the further he could go into the past. Even larger ideas had come into his head. What if he could reunite with his friends? What if he could prevent the entire war from happening? He hadn't realized just as Wells's ability evolved, something else would too: Gab, the island and the boy he posed as.

It overtook him and left to reside inside his own flesh as an echo of his own self, at the very corner of his mind. He died and Gab had been birthed from it. Gab is an unstable creation and even so, his humanity still urges him to keep living no matter what. So instead of being motivated to repeat time to save others, he keeps living to save himself so he doesn't fall back into the darkness of an unknown waiting for him.

I could keep going and talk about how he's pretty much the embodiment of the themes present in BSD, his resemblance to Atsushi that the narrative points out so graciously, and the nature of what he is supposed to be in the grand scheme of BSD, but this isn't why I brought him up.

55 Minutes has aspects that have appeared in the main story ever since the Decay of Angels have taken their place in the manga as antagonists. Dazai’s ability to control his heartbeat, time travel, Akutagawa calling Atsushi his “trial” and fighting out at sea, and the Great War being the source of the conflict. Now what if I propose my idea of what had happened to Fukuchi to be similar to what had happened to Verne when he had used Wells’s ability?

This is Fukuchi’s corpse reanimated, I think we all know it. While it’s possible Fyodor must've put a safeguard to put the condition for this to have happened or that this is a Fukuchi from another universe, I think what had happened altogether, in the end, was the consequence of using Amenogozen so freely to the point he was messing with the state of the timeline and creating paradoxes. The backlash of this divine blade had either created a divine being or let one reside in him.

It's not only 55 Minutes that has parallels/foreshadows what's to come, but Untold Origins as well. I do like noticing how Kafka Asagiri adds things so they fit more snuggly into what's to come later in the season or make the connection more obvious, like Fukuchi having a feature when Fukuzawa is visiting Oda behind bars and Fyodor appearing on the roof when Fukuzawa monologues about “V”.

I think I've been seeing some people notice this too, but I think the play featured is incredibly important. Like really, really important. I mean beyond any resemblance people saw in the visuals used in the anime background that looked like Fyodor being crucified. I feel unprepared to talk about it, so I hope I make some sort of sense.

“The Living World Is a Dream. The Nocturnal Dream is Reality” is a real quote from Ranpo Edogawa and is used as the name for this play. Twelve fallen angels gather in an old theater to earn god’s forgiveness. They had disobeyed god in the past by wanting to coexist with human beings and were shunned after the fact. During this, they are killed off one by one without the killer ever being seen. The killer, as the script follows, is a supposed angel of judgment, but it's hard to tell for the others if it really was an angel imparting their judgment or a serial killer because of how common the methods seemed to be. That is their mystery to be solved.

One of the fallen angels claims that an angel would use a divine blade to purge them and not methods like these, while another begs the question of why a fellow sinner would go after them and that an angel would have a real motive to have them killed. Their reason to going to this old theater is because they were searching for an ability user. In this fictionalized story, ability users are angels who had fallen but were able to atone and given a portion of their power back. Their hope is that when they encounter the ability user, they will gain atonement as well.

Suddenly, Murakami (the lead performer) is stabbed by a blade that came from nowhere. Completing the promised threat of an organization named “V”:

“An angel shall bring death, in the truest sense of the word, to the performer.”

So, what happened?

As he takes his newfound identity as an “ability user” in pride on stage and claims himself to be the savior of all, Ranpo explains that the angel that the play refers to is the audience watching it. A metaphor to how the audience is invisible to the characters on stage and knew almost every that had happened, but Ranpo also says that because the audience couldn't have laid a finger on the them, it means the angel couldn't have been the killer.

The “angel” was more the victim than anything and the so-called judgment imposed was the show of what was originally regarded as another victim. The switching of roles. The same thing has also applied to this murder. While Murakami was regarded the victim, the accused killer the police suspected was a man under a fake name who has randomly disappeared. Tied up behind the currents, the man had been here all along. The true victim of this case.

Which makes Murakami the real culprit of his own “murder”, but he's only a piece of the picture. After getting arrested, he speaks about how he had planned with the playwright about this but has no clue what capturing the older man was for. Not even after saying this, a detective rushes in saying that the playwright had been impaled with no weapon to be found.

Again, after an officer who had worked for the mysterious group “V” and tried to kill Ranpo after refusing to join them had been arrested, he was also killed the same way as the playwright. I feel like I don't even need to say that this “V” group is obviously the Decay of Angels after laying that out. The same motivations as Fyodor (”rid all evil of this world”) and the sword business is Fukuchi silencing people.

What was the purpose of the play though?

Besides capturing Natsume Soseki (if you haven't read it), it was foreshadowing for what was to come. Let's abandon the idea that skill users are redeemed angels for a second. Just a second, I promise. Have you ever looked up what Kaumi (神威) even means?

While one of the first results you get will refer you to gods themselves, you should be focusing on a more literal translation. That being “God’s Authority” or greater divine power, making Fukuchi function basically as Fyodor’s own angel of judgment. Let's say that ability users are the sinners and Fukuchi (or Fyodor) is the one imposing their judgment, even if they should've been in the same boat.

Just like the play, they swap the victim (Armed Detective Agency) and the killer (The Decay of Angels) for the public‘s unknowing view. This play is filled with Fyodor’s personal bias and I think the irony of their searching for the “ability user” in the play is that to Fyodor, there's no such thing as a redeemed ability user. There is only salvation of death for this great evil and that is exactly what happens to the characters from the play.

Ranpo filps this narrative on its head and forcefully changes the ending of the fallen angel. He wasn't a part of the story, he forcefully shoved through its bullcrap to create something much more ideal. Something much less miserable. It's a little fun that two people he goes out of his way to help out (Yosano & Mushitaro) both have the title of “angel of death/murder” as that's how the angel of the play is also referred to. Save the killer that was actually a victim…

With that, I really shouldn't abandon how ability users get referred to with titles like angel and demon right? Chuuya had an angelic allusion in Storm Bringer when he activated corruption for the first time, and hell, look at my buddy Gab and his mechanical wings. The further they transcend themselves of their humanity, the more angelic or demonic they become. There really is no true difference between them though.

This should've been about the trajectory of bsd…. Then it became me wanting to talk about DOA crap….

Well, I really don't know much. I connected dots that were there for me, but nothing to say for the future of BSD. I understand what is happening, but not enough to be psychic haha. I mostly went on about that because I didn't want our conversation about what is currently happening to be pushed aside because there's always more to say. Maybe if I read more of the authors involved, maybe I'd know.

If this is disappointing, oh well! It has taken me so long to think of something to say that the new chapter has already come out. Kafka Assgiri always leaves me with more questions than answers.

What even are abilities anyway?

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd meta #bsd analysis #fukuchi ouchi #bsd fukuchi #bsd 55 minutes #bsd untold origins #ranpo edogawa #bsd fyodor #the decay of angels #i should stop narrating the stories of the novels #i was going to say more #but I'm tired #the best I can say is to think of the questions bsd offers you and reread the series at any chance #you'll get more information each time and come up with more ideas for the future of BSD

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oikasugayama · 6 months

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Helloooo! I love your posts and I was wondering if you could do one of your charts with the bsd men for when you’re anxious and if they’d be good at comforting you or if they’d try their best, tried but failed and if they’d be just straight up shit at it, hope you’ve had a nice day :3

I have a few similar requests for cheering you up when you're upset, so here are my general thoughts as someone who suffers from anxiety:

Fukuzawa has the wisdom to say something genuinely helpful and calming. He also helps you with mindful breathing and makes you some tea.

Nikolai, in one of his sentimental moods, teleports you to a calmer, more peaceful location where you can calm down and feel safer.

Junichiro tells you what helps him when he feels anxious, and he comforts you by relating and talking through the situation.

Chuuya doesn't really know how to help anxiety, but he asks questions and gets you to talk and work through what's bothering you. Oda also does this but with more experience (I just noticed he's in the wrong spot, he should be further left than Chuuya)

Ango can't do shit doesn't do shit. His own anxiety paralyzes him.

Kunikida technically tries to help but he ends up making you feel worse by telling you all the other shit you should be worrying about instead.

Atsushi really, really, really wants to help but the poor kid is the most anxious person you know so he ends up making himself anxious and then you feel bad for making him feel bad.

Mori surprisingly makes you feel a little better by just talking about other shit until you stop consciously thinking about what was bothering you. It's still in the background but not as intense.

Bram tells you not to worry and that all will be taken care of. To him he's not helping, but you believe that he really will take care of the situation on your behalf so it helps you to know someone is in your corner.

Poe offers you a new novel he was writing, so you get to play in a fictional world. It's the best distraction ever.

Sigma doesn't know what anxiety is so he has no idea how to help. He tells you you can use any of his resources and that's about it.

Dazai says he'll jump off the roof with you so you don't have to deal with it anymore, and it at least makes you giggle. He'll keep saying dumb shit and you don't doubt that he really thinks offing yourself is a solution, but you also don't take him seriously so the giggles help.

Ranpo says anxiety isn't real so just don't worry -_-

Mushitaro tells you some depressing ass story of a time he was very upset as well and it just fucking sucks.

Fyodor either tells you to look to the lord for strength (I am so not joking) or he finds a way to twist you being anxious into an argument about you not believing in his ability to protect you/have things go his way.

Akutagawa says he'll kill anyone or destroy anything that's upsetting you. You really don't dig the destruction and it makes you feel worse.

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justcallmesakira · 2 months

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BESTIE IF U DONT DO THIS REQ N I WILL FACKING EAT UR MUTUALS

DAZAI WITH A SISTER DAZAI WITH A SISTER DAZAI WITH A SISTER!!

she has black cat energy and err makes suicidal jokes here and then but never does t and chuuyas always the one who pulls her away from dazais tendencies because he DOES NOT want reader to follow dazais steps and err dazai and reader have a 2 year gap and err basically dazai took her away with him when he left and thats were she sort of stopped talking BECAUSE BOOM CHIKA BOOM ODAS DEATH LEFT HER MORE TRAUAMATIZED THAN THE KIDS ASAGIRI BLEW UP!!! so errr crack and chuuya and reader is ummmm AHEM AHEM AHEM (cough coug)

AND BASICALLY MORI HAS THIS like obsession of bringing reader back to the mafia like he constantly says stuff like "Dazai, my offer still stands but please remember that i would really really love to see your dear sister back first" LIKE YKNOW WHAT I AM SAYING???????????

DAZAI AND HIS YOUNGER SISTER!

Sypnosis: you are the younger sister of Da-dazai! Is he a great brother or not? UPPP TO YOU! >< oh and maybe hide your secret vists with chuuya please!!

Genre: crack and heavy angst! (dont question it)

Warnings: suicidal themes! cans of gasoline, glitter bombs, reader is very quiet type, manipulation (for good use!)

A/N: yummy yummy

uh oh! this is gonna be so damn messy

so um first of all! i really think reader would be very intelligent like dazai like oh fuck! i just got under a whole rubble of rocks by some guy who btw is the enemy of my brother quick! think of something

and then theres this bsd aesthetic plan you make and just survive! to the shock of your horror... :D

okay but in all seriousness! he defiently jokingly gave you his suicide guide to if u ever felt inspired by him

VERY VERY NORMAL BROTHER ACTIVITY!!1

dazai stop influencing people around you to plug off them self challenge impossible: GO!!

if you do however join his meticulous activites kunikidas actually going to blow up

😇

but imagine how cute it would be a black cat energy young sis and a golden retriver brother like bish forget romantic relationships like dazai who sometimes forget he left his sister at work!

but ynkow mf dazai always wants to keep close to you because he was never really there (like my fake as friends🙄) back in the mafia! woohoo

so now you can asks him for whatever you want but now he actually feels guilty because you have now become the silent type and dont really talk that much

Great job dazai! best brother everr!❤️

Imagine running away from the mafia with ur lil sister then realising she doesnt even want to talk anymore and that you might actually failed as a big brother even after buying her a whole lotta stuff

COULDNT BE OSAMU DAZAI GUYS!!!

tell him to take you to an amusement park and he will! but dont be surprised if you see him trying to run to jump off a bridge because he does not have for the sake of god any money!

AYY dazai cosplaying toji to get milk? real or fake??? find out here!

dont click on the link :3

ANYWAYS he definetly tries his best to get you back to talking sure the only thing he could do is talk to himself with you beside him doodling some stuff but yknow...it genuinely makes him form a sad smile when he gets reminded that maybe if he were a better brother and actually comforted you it would have ended better

"I saw a cat today yknow! it had a black eye and orange patterns. Somehow it looked wise" dazai said relazing on the chair, his hands behind his head, the whole night of yokohama was quiet only the flicker of the dim light placed underneath the balcony ceiling could be heard.

The night was calm too, it had a soft storm-like feel to it. Dazai knew you were listening thats probably why he would talk to you all these months, no one else was there for him anyway. So its better than nothing.

All of a sudden amdist the silence several pokes tapped on his shoulder which made his eyes widen slightly. You held up your sktechbook infront of his face, a bunch of doodles of him and a full sketch of his side profile

"(Name)... This is amazing! Wow you could be a talented artist yknow!!" he said you didnt know whether he was just flattering you or not because of the emptiness in his eyes. Depression changes a person. But the slight flicker of light in his made it visible to your loud mind. Dazai was glad you made some progress.

Okay now hb your interactions with da agency??

I am pretty sure both you and him joined da agency together (gotta make sure his sister ACTUALLY doesn`t follow his steps!😋😋😋😋)

kunikida may act all cold around you and view u as some kid especially when you randomly make the most random ass suicidal jokes in the middle of a meeting but...

Lets say he sort of checks up on both of you every morning! cant let the dogs out now kunikida! you never know what they do....

iykwimyk

now yosano girlypop is the only person who shows genuine concern for you when you get hurt why? because she was bamboozled when she found out you are dazais sibling like

"huh- are you actually capable of being a brother? more so having family"

dazai be at the corner weeping because of the amount of slander

DESERVEDDDD😍😍😍

I can totally see fukuzawa patting both of you and dazais head after you two collaborated on a mission

IDWGDHYWDFYUDFILOVEFATHERRELATIONSHIPS

he prob randomly call you for tea i mean not too randomly but he likes your black cat energy

speaking of which ranpo and you bully da heck out of criminals before they ultimately mistake you for some god!! /nj

kenji and kyouka just chills around you and tries debating what you and dazai have in common.

belonging in the mental asylum. thats whats common between you two/nj again😁😁

With chuuya

NAWWWWH BRO NAWW☠️

Chuuyas gonna end upl like this emoji☠️☠️☠️

Okay maybe i am over exaggerating this but yknow dazai is like really smart

UNFORTUNATELY!!!

So he will definitely know when ever you two act a little🤭😝😘🤗😍🥰👍

Hes going to get tjat expression from chapter 114 and chew chuuyas expensive tuxedo!!

I bet after he finds out hes straight up going to give chuuya a flashback of stormbringer era!! 😍😁

#verynormalbrother

"W-w-w-what da SKIBIDI [name]??? YOU WILL NOT AND NEVER MEET CHUUYA AGAIN" "wow... and i thought you were trying to become a better brother :(" "YOUNG LA- i-" ":("

He was about to say lad

like manipulative ass brother like sister ig! :33333333

He prob had suspicions back in the mafia especially because of how you mostly stuck around chuuya when he wasnt there

YOUR FAULT BRO!!!

And then u rizzed chuuya up with double black eyes (get it?)

"You know [name] it still hurt me, though i promised i would never say it infront of your face but.." Chuuya said seriousness in his tone looking at you eyes "But please stop looking at me with those cat like eyes they deeply remind of someone and I DO NOT like it"

He ended this funny note with a genuine fear and irritation in his eyes. you only nodded and continued to stare at him, your eyes rivaling a black hole not that hole by the way.

A tingling feeling gathered in himself as chuuya looks at your blank stare "Dont look at me like that!" he raised his flustered voice, a small hue of pink appearing on his cheek which only grew as you held on to his sleeve, snuggling against it like a cat.

But before he could be more flushed a really dark aura crept up behind you and then, right then you knew you fucked up bad.

"i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-cant believe this!" your brothers voice perked up behind you genuine horror on his face as if he just saw his bestfriend die infront of him twice.

"Oh my fucki-" chuuya sighed, both of you are caught. "[name] ICANTBELIEVETHISOMGIAMGOINGTOENDMYSELFLIKEMYOTHERVERSIONFROMANOTHERUNIVERSEWHOLOWEREDYOURSTANDERDSICANTBELIEVETHISHIT" dazai rapped at super speed, an anger and shock unwordable enough for you to be confused at whatever hes yapping about. "DAZAI what the fuck??" now chuuya was confused too.

"ANDYOU, HERMANADAPUTA (sisterfucker in english) YOUUGLYSHORTMFWITHNOFLAGSNONOTHING,YOUTRUSTISSUED?IWILLGIVEYOUPRISONFORLIFEISSUES" "WHAT IS YOU BROTHER YAPPING ABOUT?"

And all you could do was watch in horror as the scene unfolds infront of you. But safe to say you got in big trouble when you went back home!

anyways dazais going to go full on 8 cans of gasoline on the portmafia if more is obsessed with you like him

and then you realised..

"fOr tHe fIrSt TiMe iN fOrEVer" he actually did/nj

Okay okay but in all seriousness (litearlly @justcallmesakira catchphrase guys!!) Dazai would genuinely become more protective of you if mori was targeting towards you.

i would run away to antarctica too if mori even tried interacting with me

SHES A RUNNER SHES A TRACKSTAR!!!!!🏃💨

But if you are intelligent then i guess you met fyodor too? And maybe some sort of rivalry goes on between you two like "oh its my brothers enemy, gotta help my bro blow him up!"

I have nothing much to say because dazai would make secret plans (which you alrdy know) to make sure mori doesnt get too close with you

Like oh he was planning to approach you that day? BOOM dazai is already there. Yeah like that

If mori says that however... Dazai will reply with a dark eyed gloom,tilting his head back creepily "You will have to need more then the whole of port mafia to interact with my sister"

Dazai hates mori alot and though he knows that you are old enough to handle situations that doesnt mean he wont care for his only sister. You are the only thing left that he can protect without feeling inhumanity or faraway.

A/N: HATE THISSSS NOOOUUU

Tags: @inojuuy @biscuits-spooky-corner @terururuko @little-miss-chaoss @saelique @silverbladexyz @typcallysid14 @nezuko-kamado-cute-demon

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diagonal-queen · 9 months

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hello it is i the question deliverer of ever!!!

here are a bunch of random stupid questions for you to answer. you don’t have to do all of them if you don’t want to, just the ones you find the silliest 💕💕

these are all just gonna be completely random questions i’m pulling out of my ass expect zero consistency

————————————————————————————

-what’s the best fanfic you’ve ever read/written?

-are you a spider girlie, a snake girlie, a beetle girlie, or a bee girlie? (this is how i classify people in my head so i have the answer already, but i want to know which one you think you are)

-what quote/lyrics/words from anything ever resonate with you the most?

-opinions on rat kings?

-what’s your favorite kind of leaf (and/or tree)?

-favorite type of cloud?

-who is the silliest person you know?

-what would someone have to offer you to get you to punch atsushi in the face?

-on the contrary, what would someone have to offer you NOT to punch fukuchi in the face?

-what are your most used emojis and why?

-of the authors represented in bsd, which one is your favorite? (keyword authors not characters, it’s very clear who your favorite character is lmao)

-orange juice or apple juice?

-what song is stuck in your head atm, and how much do you actually like it?

-if paint was edible, which color would you eat?

-if you could learn everything about any one thing in the universe instantly, what would you choose?

-what’s your favorite suit in a deck of cards?

-what’s your least favorite thing about your favorite thing?

————————————————————————————

ok that’s all i can think of rn. expect more later after my beain collects more ideas probably

have a BANGER of a day sir dialicious 💕💕💕

SEWER RATTTTTTTT BRO ALWAYS GOT MY BACK bro is so nice...bro <3 also im sorry for this long post to you and everyone else who sees it i know it's gonna be boring as fuck T-T

What’s the best fanfic you’ve ever read/written?

well i personally suck dick at writing and i haven't read any full fanfictions in ages...i really can't remember but if i find any

Are you a spider girlie, a snake girlie, a beetle girlie, or a bee girlie?

If i had to choose one of these i would say bee girlie because spiders are scary and snakes are scary and beetles aren't my style but bees r so fluffy and like flowers...jus like me... :D

What quote/lyrics/words from anything ever resonate with you the most?

They say the sun don’t shine forever But through any weather we’ll make it As long as we make it together - song lyric

"Someone will come for you. But first you must open your heart." - book quote

"The head may err, but never the blood." - book quote (and yes im serious lol)

"It's because of you that I don't even wanna be here anymore. Eventually I'm gonna end up jumping off a cliff because of you." - something i was told by someone

there's gotta be more but i can't remember them at the moment lmaooooo like literally any time someone asks me something i like i suddenly forget every single thing i've ever liked ever

Opinions on rat kings?

what like when rats all get their tails tied up? or just men with rat energy that i stan? well i love that second one but the first one is sad...they're stuck... :(

What’s your favorite kind of leaf (and/or tree)?

my favourite trees are cherry blossoms and jacarandas because they're GORGEOUS (honourable mention to frangipani trees) but when it comes to leaves specifically i don't really have a favourite lol

Favorite type of cloud?

cumulus because they're super cute ^^

Who is the silliest person you know?

hmm...deadass probably you man. you are hella silly and i love it

What would someone have to offer you to get you to punch atsushi in the face?

There is literally nothing you could give me to get me to punch my husband in the face

On the contrary, what would someone have to offer you NOT to punch fukuchi in the face?

the gift of flight and the complete abolition of systemic oppression in modern society

What are your most used emojis and why?

🌸 - looks pretty and i like it and i use it as the same as a happy face 💜 - purple is my colour 💓 - usually when im talking to jaya lol 😭 - when something SUUUUPER funny hehe haha 🔫 - when i threaten people to give me their arts and writings 🤧 - when ppl r nice to me...an i cry...happy.... ✨ - to add some PIZZAZZ ❤️ - i am a loving person i love a lot of ppl a lot 😌 - i use this to pretend im dom-coded

Of the authors represented in bsd, which one is your favorite? (keyword authors not characters, it’s very clear who your favorite character is lmao)

well i'm gonna be real with you, i actually am uncultured and haven't read many of the authors' works. i've read only a few, so i'd have to say of those that i've read, i liked doppo kunikida, mykola hohol and akiko yosano. i've yet to read dazai but i really really want to :(

as for individual works, i've read and enjoyed anne of green gables and the raven. i got through about a third of the great gatsby before abandoning it because i found it boring. i am still reading crime and punishment and i like it a lot.

also you don't know who my favourite character is silly goober because i have TWO in my head rn and you couldn't guess either of them i dare you to try

Orange juice or apple juice?

orange juice 🍊

What song is stuck in your head atm, and how much do you actually like it?

punky funky love by granrodeo. i love this song sm it's so catchy and fun and it just lifts my mood so much. if you asked me to name a bad granrodeo song i would glitch out because there literally isn't one

If paint was edible, which color would you eat?

hmm probably brown because it reminds me of chocolate or beige because it'd be like caramel

funfact; whenever i eat m&ms i have this ritual where i save all the brown ones for the end, i eat all the other ones except for one of each colour, then i eat all those in one go. and then i begin eating the brown ones one at a time until there are nine left (lucky number) and then i eat all those at once. its cus the brown is more chocolatey in my head literally just because it is brown

If you could learn everything about any one thing in the universe instantly, what would you choose?

cmon i cannot possibly decide this. hmm uhh fuck um. i might like to know the entire contents of the library of alexandria, the truth behind every cold case in the history of true crime, my entire family history, the truth behind ghosts and spirits and the paranormal, and those are just some of the things i'd consider.

What’s your favorite suit in a deck of cards?

probably diamonds. i really dont know why but they fuck. i also like spades cus spades look and sound super cool

What’s your least favorite thing about your favorite thing?

i seem to give it to the world a lot more than it gives it to me

#dia's discourse #thoughts: well-dressed-sewer-rat #well i hope yall have learned something about me from this #lol

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silvfyre-writings · 6 months

Text

You can break in front of me (BSD Fanfic)

Hello, and welcome back to another fic! So much for a hiatus eh? This one isn't a gift fic, but shoutout to Silver anyway for introducing this ship to me in the first place, because yeah, without you, friend, this fic never would've existed so thank you!!!

I hope you all enjoy the fic, and if you do, feel free to leave a kudos and/or comment :D

Also this is set within the Journey of Parenting AU, but you don't need to have read them to understand this fic at all.

So without further ado, enjoy!!!

“What was it like to meet the Edogawa Ranpo, Minoura-san?”

That was the question that Minoura found himself asked by every single rookie officer the moment he got back to the office after that case by the river. It hadn’t taken long for the gossip to spread; from Sugimoto’s guilt to the way that Ranpo—not Edogawa, because he seemed to hate being addressed formally—had solved the case in a minute—less than, actually, Minoura had to remind himself, because that minute countdown had been for Sugimoto, and not the Armed Detective Agency’s lead detective. And honestly, he was sick of being asked, because how was he supposed to respond?

Most of the officers he worked with had heard of Ranpo’s skills, some had even had the opportunity to witness them first hand, but none of them had ever worked with the arrogant detective on the same level as Minoura had just done, and in their books, that made him the best detective in the station. Already, he could hear the whispers of him working another case with Ranpo in the future—some of them even questioning their colleagues if it would be too forward to ask him to join the next case that drew Ranpo from his high horse—and honestly, Minoura could think of nothing worse.

Ranpo was arrogant, he was rude, and he’d clearly never lifted a finger in his damn life, and Minoura hated his guts. Sure, he respected the other detective for his skills, because he did have skill, there was no denying that. But it was almost as if whatever higher being that had created Ranpo had poured all that skill into the bowl of creation, and left no room for a desirable personality. And that was why Minoura hated him. He couldn’t understand how the rest of the Agency detectives tolerated Ranpo, because if what Minoura had witnessed that day was any indicator, then it was clear that he acted the same way back there as well.

If once thing was clear to him, it was that if he’d been Ranpo’s boss, he would’ve been fired within the first week—hell, within the first day probably.

But he was free of the man, back at his own desk, with all the paperwork from the murder that he needed to fill out and file before he could go home that day; there was also the paperwork from the Agency’s side that he needed to acquire, but that could wait until later, tomorrow if he was lucky. Because if Minoura had to listen to that obnoxious voice for another second, he was going to tear out his hair—and he didn’t have a lot of that to tear out in the first place. Fortunately though, he was given peace and quiet from his co-workers the moment he pulled out the paperwork, although he could still sense them staring, and hear them whispering, but he ignored them.

There was paperwork to do after all.

“Minoura-san.” At the sound of his name, Minoura looked up to see one of the office clerks standing beside his desk, holding out some papers. “The Armed Detective Agency dropped off the reports you requested from them.”

That was quick. Minoura had to take a moment to process what he’d just heard before his brain kicked into gear and he took the offered papers. “Thanks. Did they say anything else?”

“Um…” The clerk’s expression turned sheepish, and she hesitated before continuing, which was all the warning Minoura needed. “There was a message attached from Edogawa-san saying ‘good job today, Minoura-kun, but you still have a long way to go before you catch up to me!’”

Yep. It was settled. He never wanted to see Ranpo again for as long as he was a detective. It simply wasn’t worth the stress to deal with the man.

“Thanks… you can go now.” Minoura said, reaching up with a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. He wasn’t surprised in the slightest at the insulting message left for him—Ranpo just had to have the last word, didn’t he? With a sigh, and the sudden craving for a cigarette, he pushed back from his desk and stood, grabbing his coat on his way outside to the smoker’s area—which was really just the alleyway next to the building—and just left. Really, Minoura wanted nothing more than to go home, but that wasn’t an option, not yet anyway; there was the paperwork, plus the final patrol of his shift to deal with before he would be given the privilege to go home and sleep.

He really couldn’t wait to crawl into bed.

Already, he could hear it calling him from his apartment.

But he pushed his tiredness aside for now, knowing that if he let it take hold, the last few hours of his shift were going to be absolutely unbearable, and today had already tried him more than any other day had dared to. A betrayal involving one of his own officers… an arrogant detective with a god complex… yeah, yeah, this day really did take the cake of worst days to have.

Perhaps he’d have a drink before bed.

When Minoura walked outside, he had to squint, the sun beating down as it began to set in the sky, yet he didn’t stop walking, moving on autopilot towards the alleyway that provided him minutes of solace whenever he needed it. The moment he was away from the public eye, he reached into his coat and pulled out a packet of cigarettes, along with a lighter. He plucked a single one from the packet and held it to his lips, lighting it, and just allowing all the negativity he was feeling to leave with the first puff of air.

Smoking was as cathartic as much as it was a bad habit, but with the life and career that Minoura had chosen for himself, it was needed a little to keep him sane. He did try his best to manage it, lest he wind up like his superiors who spent more time hacking up their lungs than solving cases, but there were just some days where you needed to smoke a couple in order to deal with the events of the day, And today was one such day, so when he finished with the first cigarette, he lit another, although he didn’t smoke it; he just watched the smoke rise in front of him, thinking of nothing, but also thinking of everything.

Such was his life as an officer.

After returning to the office, Minoura sat down, finished the paperwork, and then set out to complete the final patrol of the day, climbing into his car and setting off down the street. As a detective, he didn’t need to go out on these patrols, since there were plenty of others who could do them, but he’d always found something peaceful in the end of day patrols—except for those occasions where something bad actually happened. Most of the time, he just drove his route and got to see all kinds of people being happy and enjoying their lives; school kids on the way home from school, couples wandering the streets hand in hand, old ladies getting together to judge society and share gossip with each other.

It was nice to see the people of Yokohama acting like that; it meant that things were peaceful, at least until they weren’t, which is why he wasn’t surprised when he watched a familiar figure eat the pavement with a furious shop owner following out to make sure that one Edogawa Ranpo got the message that he wasn’t welcomed there. Minoura wasn’t shocked in the slightest to see such an act—in fact, it was something he’d witnessed many times before—but it was usually drunken folk causing problems, not a detective who was quite far from home now that Minoura thought about it.

He slowed the car down, watching to see what would happen next—not because he was worried, not in the slightest. Ranpo was more than capable of handling himself, as he’d proven earlier than day, but there was just something… off about this interaction he’d stumbled across that had Minoura concerned.

And he was proven right when the shop owner proceeded to throw a bucket of what was hopefully water over the top of the detective.

Minoura slammed the brakes then, throwing the car into park and stepping out of the car in just a few seconds. “Hey! Enough!”

Both the shopkeeper and Ranpo look up at him, but while the shopkeeper suddenly looked terrified upon realising that he’d drawn the attention of the police, Ranpo looked emotionless, like a slate that had been wiped clean. He continued to sit there, on the ground as Minoura strode closer, and Minoura found it an absolute far cry from the detective he’d seen that morning.

“Minoura-san, I—I apologise—”

“Save it.” Minoura interrupted; his eyes still focused on Ranpo. But he pulled them away long enough to level the shopkeeper with a look. “Just forget it and move along.”

The shopkeeper nodded and dipped back into his store, leaving just Minoura and Edogawa alone on the sidewalk, and still, the detective refused to lift his head. Minoura let out a sigh and crouched. “You alright?”

Ranpo scoffed, and pushed himself up on his hands, wincing as he did so. He didn’t answer Minoura immediately, studying his bloody palms with a look that could only be described as empty. It had Minoura concerned for the other man just a little, only because Ranpo had been filled with smiles, and pride, and quips against him and his officers that morning, and right now he was just sitting in front of Minoura, refusing to make eye contact. It was strange. “Careful, Minoura-san, you’ll gain wrinkles if you keep frowning like that.”

His words did nothing but make Minoura frown even more. “Yeah, well, you’re being weird. And you didn’t answer my question.”

Ranpo raised his hands so that Minoura could see his palms, and wiggled his fingers. “Just fine, see? Nothing more than some scrapes, and a free shower.”

Minoura grunted and stood, reaching down to haul Ranpo upright, only letting go once he’d found his feet. He gave the other detective a onceover, and then began to nudge Ranpo in the direction of the car he’d left parked in the middle of the street. “Come on, I’ll take you back to that Agency of yours.”

The look on Ranpo’s face darkened. “I can get back myself, thanks. You don’t need to go out of your way.” Yet, despite his words, he still allowed Minoura to guide him, and climbed into the car once the door was open.

“And die from hypothermia on the way? No way.” Minoura shut the door behind the detective and dashed back to his own side, getting himself sorted before putting the car into drive. He took a moment to radio in, reporting to his colleagues that he was fine, but would be delayed in his return. Once that was done and he received the affirmative from then, he returned his attention to Ranpo. “There should be some spare clothes in the back. Might be a bit big on your tiny ass, but anything’s better than wet clothes. Oh, and there’s a first aid kit, so grab that as well.”

“Wow, so me getting thrown on my ass was all it took for you to stop hating me.” Ranpo commented as he reached into the back of the car, and the sound of plastic being shifted filled the car.

Minoura grunted. “I didn’t hate you.”

“You were going to punch me this morning.”

“Yeah, because you’re arrogant and have an ego as big as Mt. Fuji. It was annoying.”

Ranpo fell back into place, a fresh shirt, and pants in one hand, and the small, compact first-aid kit in the other. The detective didn’t try to argue his words, which meant he either didn’t care what other people thought of him, or he agreed with what Minoura was saying, and somehow, neither option surprised Minoura in the slightest. Ranpo did strike him as the kind of person to just ignore others opinions, no matter how helpful, or harmful they might’ve been, and go about his day as if they’d never been spoken in the first place.

Minoura couldn’t help but sigh; the mystery that was Edogawa Ranpo continued to grow the more he thought about him. He glanced over towards the shorter, watching him with a careful eye. “What did you even do to get thrown out?”

“Hah? What makes you think it was me.” Ranpo complained, tugging off his soaked cape and vest off, and tossing them into the back seat. His tie followed soon after, and Minoura forced his gaze back to the road when he began to unbutton his shirt.

“Need I remind you of this morning?”

Ranpo paused and hummed, giving a shrug before he pulled his shirt off. “Good point, but completely wrong. All I did was tell him that his cakes tasted terrible. Like, seriously, I’ve been to almost every bakery in Yokohama, I know my cakes. And his were bad. So I told him they were terrible, and that he should do better before claiming to make the best cakes on this side of town.” Minoura could feel eyes on him. “Unless, he is the best on this side of town. And if that’s the case, you need some new bakers.”

Minoura glanced over to see Ranpo looking absolutely unapologetic, as if he hadn’t just criticised someone’s livelihood. He wanted to mention that the bakery he’d just been shitting on, was in fact, his favourite one and that the cakes tasted fine, but he didn’t, because there was no doubt that Ranpo already knew this, and also, his attention was taken by something else.

Namely, the tattoo spread across Ranpo’s shoulder.

“Huh, didn’t strike you as the kind of guy to have a tattoo.”

Immediately, tension filled Ranpo’s entire body, and his gaze fell to the shirt he was clutching in a death grip, knuckles white—hell, Minoura wasn’t even sure if the man was still breathing, and that made him feel guilty.

Somehow, Minoura felt as if he’d stumbled across a topic he wasn’t supposed to ask about. When the silence went on, and Ranpo still hadn’t moved, Minoura spoke. “Sorry.”

Green eyes flicked towards him. “What for?”

“Making you uncomfortable…?”

Ranpo scoffed, and tugged the shirt over his head. “If you’d made me uncomfortable, I would’ve made you pull over.” A pause. “Well, actually, that’s a lie because I was, but it wasn’t you.”

“You’ve lost me.” Minoura said, more than confused by Ranpo’s words. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted an empty carpark and quickly pulled into it, putting the car into park just so he could swivel and face Ranpo. “Just be straight with me. Edogawa.”

That look of discomfort returned, and at first, Minoura was certain that he wasn’t about to get a response, but then Ranpo opened his mouth. “I thought Yasui would’ve told you…”

Minoura frowned. “Told me what?”

Ranpo shrugged, and looked away from him to stare out the window, but from the way his hands were fidgeting, Minoura knew he was just trying to find the words he needed, so he waited, not saying anything.

Finally. “You called me a guy, and well, I’m not.”

Ah shit. Minoura turned to face the front again, putting the car into drive and pulling back onto the road, guilt rising within him even though he’d never known this information in the first place. He was going to strangle Yasui the next time he saw the man though for not telling him about something so fucking important. “So, how should I call you?”

Now it was Ranpo’s turn to blink, eyes flicking open as he—they?—looked over towards him. There was a look of uncertainty that quickly faded into the relief, and Ranpo sagged into the seat. “They.”

“You could’ve mentioned that to me this morning, you know? I would’ve corrected myself.”

“I know.” And they sounded so certain of it, moving about in the seat again as they began to tug their pants off, grunting in annoyance as the fabric stubbornly clung to skin. “I don’t really go around telling people. I never told Yasui, he just picked it up from our first meeting because of how Fukuzawa-san spoke.”

Minoura nodded. It made sense now, and he did vaguely recall Yasui not calling Ranpo a he at all during their phone call that morning, but he was still going to smack the man for not just being upfront with him. If he had, then this entire situation could’ve been avoided from the start. But then again, it was his fault as well for not using his own detective skills to figure it out—the entire morning, Ranpo’s co-workers had only ever used they when talking about them in the first place, and not once had he realised what that meant.

He wanted to blame the nature of that morning’s crime for not realising, but really, it was just him that was the fool.

A wet sock nudged at his arm, and Minoura scrunched up his face, slapping Ranpo’s foot away. “What the hell—”

“Stop being mad at yourself. You didn’t know, and now you do.” Ranpo complained, finally getting their pants free and tossing them, pulling on the shorts—huh, Minoura could’ve sworn they were pants—afterwards. “How far from the Agency are we? I’m hungry!”

“A few minutes. And no, we are not stopping for food.”

“Wow, and I thought you were helping me. This is cruelty.” Ranpo whined.

Minoura rolled his eyes. “Cruelty would be if you were actually starving, which you are not. I’m sure your Agency friends will feed you once they see the state of you.”

Ranpo grinned. “You would be correct.”

The two of them drifted into silence for the last few minutes of the drive, and once they’d arrived, and Minoura had found a park, he turned in his seat and gestured for Ranpo to give him their hand. “Come on, I’ll patch you up, and then you can go.”

Ranpo passed him the first aid kit, and then their hand, watching as Minoura first cleaned away the dirt and dried blood, before wrapping a thing layer of bandages around each hand. Once that was done, Ranpo was quick to open the door and hop out of the car. “Thanks, Minoura-kun! I’m sure I’ll be seeing you again, you know, when you get a case you guys can’t handle again! Bye!”

Minoura blinked, having not expected Ranpo to just dash off like that, and it took him a few seconds to get into gear. He threw open his door and called out. “Oi, Ranpo!”

The younger detective slowed and looked over their shoulder towards him, eyes flicking open to stare at him, a question within them.

“Don’t go picking anymore fights with bakers, okay?”

He didn’t get a worded response, but he did get a loud bout of laughter; it was a reaction that had Minoura grinning to himself and chuckling under his breath as he pulled away from the Agency.

The day hadn’t gone quite like he’d expected it to when he’d woken up that morning, but really, it could’ve been a lot worse. And like Ranpo had said, he was sure they’d see each other again.

And see each other again, they did.

Only… not quite in the way that Minoura had expected.

Once again, Minoura was on an end-of-shift patrol, but instead of it being the afternoon like it usually was, this time it well into the evening. The sun was pretty much gone, the last rays of orange fading from the sky as night took over, and the streets were bustling with nightlife, because of course he’d managed to draw the short straw and get the busy route to patrol. He just knew deep down, that he wasn’t going to finish his shift on time. He couldn’t explain it, but ever since he’d woken up that morning, he’d had a gut feeling, one of dread, like something was going to go wrong but he just couldn’t quite pinpoint it. And Minoura had tried his best to ignore it, dealing with as many cases as he could, and tackling the stack of paperwork on his desk, but still, the feeling remained, and it had him just a little bit nervous.

But so far, his patrol had been peaceful; drunken patrons were behaving for once, albeit still yelling and stumbling about as they usually did, and the people that worked the street were just doing what they always did. Some of them waved when they spotted his car before slinking off elsewhere—he was one of the few officers that turned a blind eye, so long as they were being safe; a job was a job after all, and he was lucky to have the one he did. There were people in the world that weren’t as lucky.

Maybe this feeling was just a feeling after all. Minoura thought to himself as he turned down another street, already thinking about what he’d do the moment he got home if his patrol continued the way it was. A hot meal… the comfort of his bed… a nice warm shower, all things that did wonders after a long and draining shift, and things that Minoura thoroughly enjoyed doing on the days where he worked evenings. Because they were long. And swung between eventful and boring with no actual between.

It was as Minoura pulled up at a red light that it happened.

He glanced out the window whilst he waited for traffic to move, watching the patrons of a bar enter and leave, and it was amongst the leaving crowd that he saw a familiar face; one detective, dressed up nicely, a red flush on their face that was visible even from this distance even though they were walking normally, and for some reason, alone. Minoura narrowed his eyes, recalling vividly how he’d heard that Ranpo had almost no sense of direction, and would get lost if you told them to go from A to B, even if the route was a straight line. So it didn’t make much sense for them to be out at night, drinking alone.

Not that Minoura was saying that Ranpo couldn’t drink, because they could; they were an adult after all, and more than capable of making their own decisions—although Minoura would argue that sometimes their decisions, were not the best.

Like letting Sugimoto try and shoot them.

Even months later, Minoura still thought over that case, and inevitably, wound up thinking about Ranpo.

But that case was why Minoura continued to watch, eyes flicking between the light and the detective, that feeling of dread in his gut growing with each passing second. He watched as Ranpo said goodbye to someone, a friend from the looks of it, before walking in the opposite direction, coming to a halt where the line of taxi’s were picking people up. Relief filled him. Good, they’re being smart.

And of course, that was when things went just had to go awry.

Someone approached Ranpo, gaining the detective’s attention, and while he couldn’t hear what was being said, he also didn’t have to; Ranpo’s body language said more than enough. Where they were once relaxed, they were now tensed, and simultaneously looked like they were both frozen in place and about to flee. Whatever interaction this was, it wasn’t wanted, and Minoura wasn’t about to just sit by and watch it happen; doing so would just make him a terrible… friend? Sure, he and Ranpo weren’t exactly friend material, but they’d been working on cases together for the past few months now, so surely they weren’t acquaintances either.

Minoura shook his head. Focus, idiot!

But just as he was about to flip the car into park, the light turned green, and he was forced to keep driving, lest he make the people behind him angry. Minoura cursed under his breath, scanning his surroundings for the closest car park. He found one, just halfway up the next street, and pulled into it faster than he’d ever parked before. It only took him a couple of seconds then, to throw off his seatbelt, and then leave the car, breaking out into a jog as he ran back down the street, hoping, praying, that Ranpo was still where he’d last seen them.

And sure enough, they were there, and so was the person who’d clearly decided Ranpo was the person to try and make a move on if their flirtatious eyes and wandering hands were anything to go by. All things that Minoura had seen before, but usually, if the attention was unwanted, the receiving party would snap and shove the other away. But not Ranpo. It was clear that the attention was unwanted, but they didn’t move. In fact, Minoura wasn’t even sure they were breathing.

The worst by far though, was their eyes.

Normally bright and full of life, and energy, now they were dull, blank, empty.

It was a terrifying look, especially for someone like Ranpo to wear.

Which was why Minoura didn’t hesitate to reach out and grab onto Ranpo’s arm, pulling them free of the stranger and into his own grip. And even though his own chest was heaving from his mad dash down the road, Minoura stood tall and levelled the other man with a glare. “They’re mine. Back off.”

The stranger glared at him, contemplating something—probably whether or not fighting for Ranpo was worth it, and well, wouldn’t he get a fright if he chose that path—before he scoffed and stormed off back towards the bar. Good riddance.

Minoura waited until the person was out of sight before he turned his attention towards Ranpo. “Hey, you good?”

Ranpo sucked in a breath and blinked, a little bit of life coming back to their eyes, and they slowly lifted their head to look at him, although Minoura wasn’t quite sure if he was really being seen in that moment. Ranpo’s eyes would focus on him for not even half a minute before glazing over again, and for once in his life, Minoura had no idea what he was supposed to do here. Did he take Ranpo home? Did he take them back to the Agency? Did he call someone? At the very least, you can get them off the street. Minoura nodded to himself, the beginnings of a plan forming in his mind. He carefully placed a hand on Ranpo’s back, ignoring the flinch that followed, and began to guide them down the street.

They made it across the street, away from the crowd, and were just passing a side street when Ranpo shoved him away, stumbling and falling to his knees as they emptied their stomach onto the ground beneath them.

“Shit.” Minoura cursed, shrugging off his coat, and stepping forward to drape it over Ranpo’s trembling form. He knelt down beside Ranpo to run a hand across their back soothingly as they threw up again, and just stayed silent, hopefully providing a little bit of comfort by being there. He wasn’t sure whether it was the situation that Ranpo had found themself in, or the alcohol that caused them to vomit, but neither one was good in his books, and he was at a little bit of a loss to help, especially when he’d never seen the other detective in such a state before

Ranpo choked and coughed before spitting a glob of saliva onto the ground, taking a very shaky breath as they sat back on their heels, their hands clasped in front of their face. To Minoura, it looked like they were barely holding themselves together and that was more than enough for him to reach out and carefully wrap an arm around Ranpo’s shoulders. Ranpo flinched under his touch, green eyes flying towards him before recognition filled them. There were tears running down Ranpo’s cheeks as well, which did nothing but make his heart clench.

“Come on.” Minoura said gently, guiding Ranpo upright. “I’m on patrol right now. You can sit in the car while I finish, and then I’ll take you home.”

Ranpo shook their head. “Not home.”

“Ranpo—”

“Please.” That one word, spoken so quietly, so painfully, caused Minoura’s argument to die off completely. But it also left him unsure of what to do. Ranpo not wanting to go home, meant that the Agency itself was also out of the question, which didn’t leave him much of an option. He could take Ranpo back to the station to rest in one of the offices—he’d kick out a colleague if he had to—or he could try and track down the friend that Ranpo had been with tonight—but there was always a chance that that person wasn’t actually a friend, but just an acquaintance, and Minoura wasn’t sure he’d be able to avoid worrying about the detective without knowing who exactly was looking after them.

Which only left one option.

His own apartment.

He muddled over it as he started walking back towards the car, making sure that Ranpo was keeping up with him every step of the way. It wasn’t like his apartment was bad, but he certainly hadn’t cleaned it in a few days—easy to do when you lived on your own—although he was certain that right now, Ranpo probably wouldn’t care as to the state of his apartment. The only issue that Minoura could see was if someone was waiting for Ranpo at their home, because he had no way of letting that person where Ranpo was to begin with, and the last thing he wanted to do was make someone worry.

But… was there any other choice?

No, there isn’t. Minoura sighed. “I’ll bring you back to mine, then. But is there anyone waiting for you that’ll worry if you don’t go home?”

It took a while for Ranpo to answer, so long in fact that they reached Minoura’s car first. Minoura opened the passenger door for Ranpo, and watched as they crawled in, curling up against the seat and pulling his coat up until their face was almost completely hidden. Only once they stopped moving, did they speak. “Just Fukuzawa-san… I’ll text him…”

Minoura hummed. “Alright. But tell me if you change your mind.”

He shut the door and jogged around to his own side, wanting nothing more than to get home.

The sooner he completed his patrol, the better.

Minoura didn’t know what he’d been expecting upon arriving home with Ranpo in tow, but finding himself knocked to the ground wasn’t it. He’d managed to shut the door to his apartment behind him, before the tiny form that was Ranpo, cannonballed into him, knocking him off balance and sending the two of them to the floor. At first, Minoura was stunned—he’d never seen the detective in such a state before and honestly, it scared him. Because the Ranpo he knew was always so unphased by whatever people said and did—he still felt chills thinking back to the case with Sugimoto—so to see him so obviously affected by something, well, it had to be bad… didn’t it?

It wasn’t until the first sob broke free that those protective instincts of his finally woke up, and he wrapped his arms around Ranpo’s shivering form. On the ride home, Ranpo had stopped shaking, but now those tremors were back in full force, almost as if Ranpo had a chill that they couldn’t shake. Ranpo’s face was buried into his chest, their hands clutching at his shirt with white knuckles as they sobbed. Minoura could feel tears start to seep through his shirt, and he tightened his grip, holding them close. He didn’t say anything, knowing that right now, words of comfort were not what the detective in his arms needed.

If anything, Ranpo was a quiet crier; only letting out the occasional sob whenever their breath hitched, although it was like they were holding themselves back. Otherwise, it was mostly tears and shaking, and Minoura had to wonder why that was their reaction. Right then, he had a lot of questions, but he asked none of them, mostly because he was still trying to comprehend the fact that he had Edogawa Ranpo breaking down in his arms. And boy, was he struggling to believe that this was real and not some fucked up dream his subconscious had thrown at him.

Because he wouldn’t be surprised if it was.

It wasn’t as if Ranpo hadn’t been on his mind almost constantly since their last interaction with each other.

But it wasn’t the right time to delve into that, he could do that later.

“Just breathe.” Minoura said after Ranpo’s breath hitched again. He felt a slight nod against his chest, and took an exaggerated breath, relieved when Ranpo did their best to follow. “There you go, just like that.”

Ranpo didn’t say anything, not that Minoura expected them to, but with each breath that they took, they began to relax.

And Minoura continued to hold them the entire time, holding them close, running his hand up and down their spine, tugging his coat back over them whenever it started to slip. He only loosened his grip when Ranpo loosened theirs, but made no move to, well, move.

He let his head thunk against the wall, which drew a tiny flinch from Ranpo. “Sorry.” Minoura apologized.

Ranpo let out a barely audible sigh, and dragged themself out of his arms, looking exhausted as they sat there, drowning in his coat. They raised a hand to scrub at the drying tear tracks on their face. “It’s fine. Sorry for the intrusion.”

Minoura snorted. “I think we’re a bit past pleasantries at this point, but no matter. You good now?”

“Yeah.” Ranpo sighed again as they pushed themselves to their feet, and Minoura was quick to follow, albeit not without a groan as his knees protested the moment, which cause the other detective’s lips to twitch upwards in amusement.

“You’re getting old, Minoura-kun.”

“I don’t want to hear that from someone who’s only four years off thirty.” Minoura kicked off his shoes and straightened them before stepping into his apartment. “I apologise for the mess, I haven’t had a chance to clean yet.”

“I’m staying?” Ranpo said, sound surprised.

Minoura turned to face them, a confused look on his own face. “Yeah…? You said you didn’t want to go home. Did you really think I was going to just bring you here, help you through your breakdown, and then throw you out?”

Silence, and then. “… it wasn’t a breakdown.”

Minoura gave Ranpo a look.

“Okay, maybe I broke down a little.”

I think that was more than just a little, was what Minoura wanted to say, but Ranpo was starting to take on a defensive posture the longer he looked at them, and the last thing he wanted was them leaving. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to handle that stress—he was already struggling to deal with his current stress in not knowing what had caused Ranpo’s carefully constructed exterior to crumble in the first place; another thing he had to settle with not getting an answer for, because he knew that if he asked, he wouldn’t get an answer. Best he take care of Ranpo in their current state, and question later.

“Regardless, you should rest. Drinking and crying don’t really do well for one’s exhaustion.” Minoura gestured towards the short hall where his bedroom and bathroom lay. “You can take my bed for the night. Grab some clothes from the closet, take a shower if you want. Would you like some tea.”

Ranpo blinked slowly, brow furrowing just a little as they ran over the words in their mind again. “… I’ll just go to bed.”

“I’ll be on the couch if you need anything.” Minoura said, watched as Ranpo nodded before heading down the hall and disappearing into his room. He continued to watch, just in case he was needed, but after a few minutes of silence, figured that everything was fine.

With a sigh, Minoura moved over towards the couch, clearing it of old case files, and laundry that he had yet to put away; there was already a blanket hanging on the back if it from the many times he’d fallen asleep on the couch while working, but there weren’t any pillows, something he’d regret in the morning when he woke up.

Once there was sufficient space for him to sit, he set about making himself a cup of tea—he was more a coffee drinker, but drinking a coffee this late when he still had some adrenaline coursing through his veins, was a recipe for disaster. It took a few minutes for the tea to brew, but after it was done, Minoura took the mug and deposited himself onto the couch, dropping his head back and letting out a massive sigh.

Yet another day that hadn’t gone to plan, and once again it was because of one Edogawa Ranpo.

It wasn’t fair to pin the blame on Ranpo, not in the slightest, because neither situation had been their fault. But that wasn’t what bothered Minoura, no what bothered him was the way Ranpo had reacted to the situations. The first one with the baker had them shut down completely until Minoura had stepped in to provide assistance, and this time, with the touchy stranger, they’d had a complete total breakdown.

It was fair to come to the assumption that Ranpo had some kind of trauma that caused such reactions from them, but then that begged the question as to what kind of trauma? Minoura hadn’t worked with Ranpo long—only a few months of cases here and there—but Yasui had never mentioned anything about Ranpo being triggered while on a case with the detective, so it was safe to say that whatever darkness there was to Ranpo’s mind, it was Ranpo and Ranpo alone that knew of it. And Minoura knew that the only way to be certain, was if he asked, but he also knew if he did, Ranpo would withdraw, or deflect and refuse to answer.

That was what most victims did when it came to talking about their trauma.

And while Minoura wasn’t the kind to speculate, based upon the situations, and Ranpo’s reactions, he could come to some kind of conclusion. But without knowing for sure, it would simply remain a speculation. It was best that he forget about it entirely and let Ranpo tell him—if they ever did.

Minoura paused.

Minoura frowned.

And then Minoura groaned.

Because once again, he was thinking of Ranpo, thinking of them as close even, though they were nothing but. At least… that’s what he thought, but Ranpo was Ranpo and had a tendency to push boundaries and cross lines for the people they deemed worthy of their presence and somehow, Minoura fell into that small category. Somehow. And for some reason, that came with the added effect of having the younger detective on his mind more often than not, which set about confusing Minoura even more.

Mostly because he couldn’t remember the last time he’d thought about someone so much.

Regardless, it was annoying and inconvenient, and always happened at inappropriate times, so Minoura forced his thoughts to the back of his mind, finished the rest of his tea, and stretched out on the couch to sleep.

It felt like Minoura had only been asleep for five seconds when he woke again to the pitch black of his apartment, and the distinct sound of someone throwing up. Minoura blinked until his brain kicked into gear and reminded him that he was not the only one in the apartment that night. Ah shit.

He groaned as he sat up, swinging his legs off the couch and standing before he made his way to the kitchen to grab a glass and fill it with water before he headed to the bathroom. Another retch greeted him as he paused in the doorway, and he waited until the noise stopped before he announced his presence. “I’m turning the light on.”

There came a garbled response from Ranpo’s direction, a protest, most likely, but Minoura had already flipped the light switch, bathing the room in light.

Ranpo was hunched over the toilet, eyes screwed shut with a sheen of sweat on their forehead, arms wrapped around their middle. “Fuck…”

“Alcohol?” Minoura asked, coming to kneel beside Ranpo, placing a hand on their back.

“Alcohol and trauma, actually.” Ranpo gave an empty chuckle and opened one eye. “I woke you?”

Minoura shrugged and offered the glass. “I grew up with cats. You become accustomed to waking up to the sound of puking.

“Ah.” Ranpo took the glass, the first mouthful of water being used to wash out their mouth, and the rest of the water slowly drunk until the glass was empty. They didn’t say anything more, allowing a silence to fall across the room.

Minoura took the chance to study Ranpo carefully, noting that they’d changed from their own clothes into one of his old sweaters, the sleeves bunched at his elbows, and some pants. Ranpo’s complexion was pale, their eyes glazed and hair messy, and there were faint tremors to their form. It made Minoura want to pull them close and never let go, but he refrained. Ranpo didn’t look like they particularly wanted to be touched—it was a little obvious in the way they’d squeezed themself in between the wall and the toilet.

“Do you… want to talk about it perhaps?” Minoura asked.

Immediately, Ranpo’s face scrunched. “Fuck no. I like you and all, but you still got a long way to go before I trust you with that part of my life.”

“That’s fair—wait what?” Minoura spluttered. “What do you mean you like me?”

Ranpo’s face screwed up even more. “What do you mean, what, you started it.”

“How?”

“You just did!” Ranpo complained, pulling away from the toilet, and out of the tiny gap, shuffling over to bump shoulders with Minoura. “That look for starters.”

“I do not have a look.” Minoura deadpanned.

“You do!” Ranpo insisted, and then proceeded to throw him a look that could only be described as a lovestruck teenager. Minoura could feel his cheeks heating up, and Ranpo grinned. “See, that look!”

“That’s just—I don’t—ugh, you’re a menace.” Minoura huffed and climbed to his feet, ruffling Ranpo’s already messy hair on the way, producing an irritated huff from them. “Whatever, I like you, you like me, we can figure it out tomorrow and not on my bathroom floor.”

Now it was Ranpo’s turn to blush, and on their already pale complexion, it was obvious. They opened their mouth to say something, and then shut it, and repeated the action a few times before they huffed. “Just help me up, will you?”

Minoura reached out and grabbed onto Ranpo’s hands with his own, tugging them upright. He watched them for a moment as they flushed the toilet. “You need anything?”

Ranpo shook their head and shuffled out of the bathroom, pausing in the doorway for just a moment. “Can you stay with me?”

“Hmm?”

“It’s… easier to sleep if someone I trust is with me…” They explained.

“And you trust me?” Minoura asked, face softening when Ranpo nodded. “Alright then. But if you drool on me, that’s it.”

Ranpo laughed, the brightest sound that Minoura had heard all evening, and led the way to Minoura’s room where they didn’t hesitate to crawl into Minoura’s bed as if it were their own. Minoura followed, albeit a little more cautiously, not used to sharing his bed with another person. It felt right though, especially when after he got settled, Ranpo crawled closer until their head was resting on their shoulder.

There were no goodnights, no other words said, the two of them simply getting lost in their thoughts as they prepared for what was to come tomorrow, and how it would end for the both of them.

But until then, they would enjoy whatever this small moment was.

People say you’re a terrible person, Edogawa Ranpo. Minoura thought as he drifted off to sleep. But not to me, you aren’t.

#bsd #bungo stray dogs #bsd fanfic #edogawa ranpo #minoura #minouran #hurt/comfort #angst #comfort #writing #fanfic

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sigmafied · 2 years

Text

BSD Boys With An S/O Who Cries Easily

- characters: tecchou suehiro, sigma, and chuuya nakahara

- warnings: none

- notes: i had to delete the original post for this since it wouldn’t show up in tags and i lost the ask ;-; but ty for sending in this request anon!

Tecchou

- Confused boy #1

- Let’s say you’re crying over a scene in your favorite book/TV show

- This man will be so out of the loop

- May give you a blank stare but does not mean anything bad

- Will be genuinely concerned about you and constantly asks if you’re okay

- Even if you say it’s something fake or not real, he’ll probably treat it as such

- Now if it’s something serious that’s a different story

- He’ll immediately hug you and pull you in close, letting you cry on him

- “You can cry as long as you need to. I’m always here for you.”

- Will offer you his questionable dishes to comfort you

- Carries you to the couch and cuddles with you until you are able to calm down (I want Tecchou cuddles 😩)

Sigma

- Confused boy #2

- Thinks he did something wrong and will freak out

- You’ll have to explain that you just get emotional easily

- Will probably cry with you so you’re not alone

- If it’s something small like maybe finding an animal so cute you start crying, he’ll join you and find it cute as well

- He doesn’t want you to feel weird for crying especially if it's in public

- In serious situations, he will be awkward since he has never been in a situation where he wanted to comfort someone

- He's trying his best though

- Uses his words more than physical affection to show that he cares

- “I don't know what you may be feeling, but I want you to know that you don't have to go through it alone. I'll be right by your side.”

Chuuya

- Rushing over to your side ASAP even if he’s at work

- Hates to see you cry even if it’s over something small like a movie

- Although he will tease you for it (just a little)

- For something more serious, he’ll immediately be pissed at whoever made you cry and vow to find them

- Anyone who dared to make his s/o cry had some major balls that he would ultimately crush

- Will definitely contact Akutagawa or The Black Lizard to help him out

- Will smother you in physical affection and little gifts

- But if it��s something like mourning a death, he’ll silently hold you and kiss your forehead

- Will whisper affirmations in your ear to ease you a bit

- “I’m so sorry you’ve had to experience this. I’ll be right here if you need anything. Don’t be afraid to ask.”

- May take you out for a walk or a motorcycle ride to let you get some fresh air

- Will hold you in bed and let you rest your head on his shoulder

taglist: @nameless-shrimp @nullified-kiss @sonder-paradise

#bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs x reader #bsd x y/n #bsd x you #bungou stray dogs x you #chuuya x reader #sigma x reader #tecchou x reader

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akaashisupremacy · 3 years

Text

Brimming with Hope

Summary: Having broken off your engagement for an arranged marriage with Gojo, your relationship is in shreds. As you two give your relationship a second chance, what does hope look like to two disillusioned lovers?

Gojo Satoru x reader

Multi-fandom Masterlist || HQ Masterlist || Ao3 version

Genre: fluff, angst, exes to friends to lovers (wc: 1.5k)

“I don’t think they’ve fully made up their mind about me.” Gojo Satoru confesses to Nanami Kento.

In between assignments and his students, Gojo finds Nanami at Tokyo Jujutsu Tech’s grounds. They’re strolling along one of the many wooden hallways when Gojo opens up about you, his ex-fiancee and his current lover.

“What makes you say that?” Nanami rarely involved himself in other people’s romantic entanglements. Too much work really.

Gojo shrugs and sighs, “It’s like their affection is platonic. They care about me as a person, but I’m not sure if they have romantic feelings for me.”

The latest development of his relationship with you has been nothing short of daunting. Your relationship, albeit not exclusive was running past the six month mark. The longer he stayed around you the more pressure he felt. Commitment is not his thing. Dating his ex is also not his thing. But you certainly are.

“Can you blame them?” Nanami snorts, “How does it feel to be at the other end of the uncertainty?”

Gojo scowls in silence, hands pressed deep into his pocket.

“Well if they’re going out with you and stuff, then that’s not platonic.” Nanami offers. “Just make sure you’re not just fucking around again. Some people deserve better, Gojo. Leave them alone if you can’t get your shit together.”

Gojo stops walking. Nanami’s words are harsh and cold, voicing Gojo’s ultimate fear about himself.

Gojo opens his mouth and closes it shut. Nanami raises a brow. He senses some hesitation.

“Everything we do feels more intimate. I’ve been with other people, but this feels so…so….deep.” he murmurs.

Nanami turns around and snorts, “It’s the feelings. You’ve caught feelings.”

“This relationship feels so temporary...just when I feel like I’ve settled in, I’m to be up on my toes knowing this isn’t going to last. I realized they eventually want a family, but not with me. Because that’s just not me. It feels like there’s a time bomb waiting to go off.” Gojo continues, his tone silent and mournful.

More than anyone, Gojo knows you deep desire to be married and have a quiet family life. It's something he doesn't want and it pains him to know that you'll eventually go your separate ways.

Nanami breathes out, waiting for Gojo to catch up with a few long strides, “You can’t have everything.”

“I don’t need everything. Just the things that count.” Gojo replies, walking by Nanami’s side.

“Then you have to look for a happy middle, for you and for them.” Nanami shrugs.

Gojo scratches his head. What can he do?

————————————————————————————— You walk out of the morgue to leave Ieri to her work. As you step out, you come face to face with Nanami, who looks surprised that you’re here.

“Didn’t expect you to be around Ieri’s lair.” he comments.

“I didn’t expect to have a casualty either.” you shrug, waving around a file.

You hardly ever see Nanami after graduating. The school grounds were big. Your schedules never line up. Neither of you were particularly close.

He silently looks around if Ieri is behind you.

“So you and Gojo…” he trails.

You roll your eyes and cross your arms, “Not you too! You know what, instead of asking me, you should ask Gojo and his commitment issues, for updates.”

Your voice rings louder on the empty walls than you intended.

“I did.” he replies.

“And?”

“Commitment issues with a capital “C” indeed.” Nanami states, as if the fact was self-evident. What’s new? You sniff.

“It’s unusual to see him so conflicted about you. You used to be his rock.” he adds.

Your eyes narrow, as if asking for more information. You were never really sure how Gojo felt about you when you two were younger. He seemed attracted during your brief arranged engagement, but his attention obviously flitted elsewhere after that.

Nanami relents, “When we were freshmen, you reminded him of home. He pretends not to be homesick all the time. He’s not very good at hiding it when he talks about you.”

“Well, that feeling didn’t last, did it?” you murmur just loud enough for Nanami to hear.

The outside of the morgue has always been a little dark. You wished the lights were dimmer because you know Nanami is observing you.

“Not to defend him, but he was so wrapped in you and your engagement that he needed to find who he was outside of that. He likes attention, too. Can’t deny that. But his affections were sincere for a time.” he says, “I don’t know where his feelings stand right now. This isn’t to give you false hope, but he can be in love, even though it’s against his greater instincts and experience.”

He bows briefly to excuse himself. He needs to head in.

“But you already know that deep down. Out of all of us, you know him the longest, and I would argue, the best.” he adds.

You're left outside stunned by his words. Out of all his surviving friends, you assumed it was Nanami who knew him better than everyone else. It was you. You knew him best, even when Gojo wasn't by your side.

You smile a bit. There are some bonds broken romances can't break.

———————————————————— On a train home from your assignment, you find the bullet train crowded as usual. Rush hour is the bane of your existence in Tokyo.

As you try to find an empty seat, you’re surprised to find Gojo opening some sort of regional snack (again).

“How is it that you have so much time for souvenir shopping?” you groan in comment.

“It’s nice to see you, too.” he offers the seat next to his.

You plop down beside him, distracted. You think back to what Nanami said earlier. What was it that Nanami said? That you were Gojo’s rock? What did that mean really?

He tries to offer you some food. You wave him off dismissively. After gathering your thoughts, you decisively turn to him.

“I just want to know,” you swallow, “How did you feel about me when we were kids.”

With his mouth ajar, he blinks. Where was this coming from?

“Why?” he instinctively asks.

You purse your lips, “I’ve been meaning to ask for the longest while. I want to know your answer.”

He leans back into his seat and puts his food down in concentration.

“I thought I knew what love was and it came in the form of you. It’s kind of dumb. What would a teenager know about that kind of stuff?” he shrugs, “I liked the idea that you liked me. You were someone who supported me. You were there for me. You were generous with your time and affection.

“Looking back it’s just infatuation, isn’t it?" he asks rhetorically.

“You sounded naive.” you say, neither agreeing nor disagreeing.

He chuckles, “Who wouldn’t be at that age?”

“And sincere.” you followed up with a smile.

Gojo turns away from you. He sees glimpses of your early teenage years when he sees that smile. It was the smile you wore when he visited you at your clan’s home and helped out with your chores. You liked it when he would carry the firewood you gathered from the forest.

“...you made me feel so grown up, like I had my life together. Not everyone liked who they were engaged to, but I really liked you and you had believed in me so much.” he murmurs, “I felt so lucky to be able to marry you one day. I was literally brimming with hope. But that was 13 years ago.”

You both get off the train. The crowded station greets you both. Although you walk side by side, it is too easy for the crowd to sweep you away. You hold onto his sleeve. He doesn't notice.

You try to say goodbye when you make it out, but he seems distracted. You begin to walk away.

“You’re not saying goodbye?” he asks, startled.

“I did, but you didn’t mind me.” you smirk with your arms crossed.

“Sorry. There’s a lot going on in my mind.” he nods, walking up beside you.

He leans in to plant a kiss on your cheek. You pull away.

“We’re in public,” you remind him. Gojo isn’t public with you on anything.

He kisses you anyway, pressing his lips on your cheek. You’re surprised but not unpleasantly so. His kiss is long and lingering. You embrace him with your arms around his waist. You briefly close your eyes to drown out the noise of the station.

Gojo can feel his heart racing a thousand kilometers per second. His shoulders relax. It's strangely freeing to be able to kiss you in public.

He knows he’s not into commitment, but whenever he sees you, he questions myself.

“I have to go now.” you bid softly.

I love you. He holds back. He waves carefully to not let his words escape his mouth. He’s not fifteen anymore. He should know better.

Gojo begins walking back to Jujutsu Tech. Being able to kiss you goodbye made him feel so grown up, like he has his life together more than he actually does. It makes him feel, once again, that he is brimming with hope.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I wrote this as a follow up for another Gojo x reader fic who used to be engaged. Check out the other parts!

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 || Part 6 || Part 7 || Part 8

Comment or message to be added to the taglist! Or write down some comments about your feelsssss

Series Taglist: @tokyo-love-hotel@samkysnks@herownescape@cherrianne192@shamelessdonutsludgebanana@kageyamakock@shirostrbl@luvang3l@cloudsinthecosmos@httpjungoo @saturnki @itstheee-ha-chan@gucci-froggy @soy1melk @dora-the-grownup @cherryonigiri @fiona782

If you’d like to continue being part of my taglist (JJK or Haikyuu), please let me know! I also write oneshots for both fandoms and soon I’ll be doing BSD too!

#gojo x reader #gojo x y/n #gojo x you #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru x gender neutral reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x y/n #gojo angst #gojo scenario #jjk x gender neutral reader #jjk x you #jjk x reader #jjk x y/n #satoru gojo x you #satoru gojo x y/n #satoru gojo x reader #jujutsu kaisen scenarios

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narrators-journal · 3 years

Note

Could I request a BSD lovecraft x short(4”11) female reader

Soulmate au

Fluff to smut plz

And could lovecraft use his ability in the smut part?

It's not exactly what you asked for, but I hope it's still enjoyable! It was a fun bit of a challenge for me, I enjoyed it. Also, thanks for sending in an ask for this, I appreciate you humoring my weirdness <3

CW: Tentacles, size difference, technically teratophilia

Tagged: @ravenina14

Checking the clock, you saw that it was nearly morning, sighing heavily at that fact. Part of you wanted to say fuck it and go through until the next night, but your stomach twisted and coiled like a spring about to pop, you were far too high strung from a mixture of energy drinks and stress to sleep at the moment. So, with a sigh, you ran a (s/c) hand through your (h/l), (h/c) hair and sat back in your desk chair.

For a moment, you just sat there in your room, thinking about all of the weirdness in your life instead of all of the college work you still had to do. First, you'd lived since the age of eighteen with the name 'Howard P. Lovecraft' stamped across your lower back, a soul mate mark, meaning that was the name of your forever partner. Second, the man assigned that odd name was equally odd. So, fate had assigned you to a man that you were pretty sure wasn't quite human, or at least he had a very out there ability, to spend your life with. Finally, you'd met said man when you saw him walk out of the ocean one day as you went to the store. Not exactly your usual meet-cute.

That wasn't to say your soul mate wasn't attractive, though. He had that same sort of charm one might find from Illumi Zoldyck, with long, wavy black hair, tired, dark eyes like the darkest parts of the ocean, and pale skin, he also could look a lot like the anime character. Though Lovecraft was likely taller than him, and a little more oblivious. Either way, he was cute, in an awkward way, so you weren't upset to have him as a partner, just amused by the oddity of the situation. In fact, remembering him had brought a good idea to your head.

So with that, you pushed yourself up from your chair to stretch before heading out to the living room, where Lovecraft laid on your couch like a corpse in a casket, watching the television in a stiff mimicry of what you showed him when teaching him how to relax there when the two of you had first begun to settle into your new normal. "Lovecraft," you said, getting a mixture of a groan and a hum from the low energy man, "I need cuddles," Without a word, he lifted his lanky arms and let you flop onto his chest before laying his limbs back as they were, barely looking up from the ocean documentary on the television. Either way, the simple affection made you sigh as your tense body soaked up the comfort. However, the cuddles and the sounds of the documentary didn't seem to quite reach that knot of tension in your soul, much to your annoyance.

After a few attempts to get comfortable in your lanky boyfriend's arms on the couch, attempting to find the best possible position for comfort, you sighed, brushing your bangs from your face and just blandly watching what was on the television in defeat, "Are you okay, (y/n)?" Lovecraft asked, turning his dark eyes to you at last, seeming to read your body language in a single, barely-blinking look since he began rubbing small circles into your back like you'd done to him a few times when he was grumpy after working with the Guild. And while you appreciated the gesture, it did little to help you relax as much as you needed. "I'm a bit stressed out from college, but I can't seem to unwind enough to sleep." You admitted, dropping your head onto his shoulder sadly. "I'm sorry about that," he muttered, his deadpan voice doing nothing to convince you that he was honest, which he likely wasn't, but you'd gotten used to his aloof manner, "Maybe you could take a bath? Those are said to be relaxing." he offered, but you simply skewed your mouth to the side at the idea. It wasn't like the idea was really off-putting, you just didn't want to get up and go through all that work. Though, it did give you an idea.

Turning your (e/c) eyes up to the pale, dark-haired man you called your soulmate, moving so you straddled him and tried to project as much seductive charm as your little body could produce, "Y'know, there's another way to destress that I could try~" as you spoke, making your best bedroom eyes at the oblivious man, you toyed with the collar of his shirt. When he didn't take the hint, you gave him a swift kiss, swiftly moving your kisses from his mouth down to his neck, which seemed to clarify your meaning to the pale man.

He put a hand on your shoulder to stop you, encouraging you to sit up, "I thought copulation was for breeding, and you didn't want a child." Copulation. You sometimes wanted to smack your soulmate with a book. But, you refrained, simply snorting instead, "No, Lovecraft, sex can be for fun as well." You assured, "just don't cum inside me and no children shall be created." He hummed at your words, but you took the chance to slip your hands under his shirt, trying to maybe convince him to help you out, but he once again stopped your advances, "While I wouldn't mind having fun, I'd prefer to not lose my clothing." He hummed, earning another huffy expression from you, but you sighed again, your expression of slight annoyance softening, "Do you just not want to do anything? You can say so," You watched Lovecraft contemplate your question, then replied in his low energy, low voice, "No, I don't mind having...sex," he tried, making you smile at the way he seemed to learn from you, "I just do not want to strip,"

After that, you laid back against him, contemplating what to do. Sex was likely the best way to exhaust yourself and relax in a timely manner, but Lovecraft kind of needed to be at least somewhat naked for that to happen. After a moment of thinking, you came upon a compromise, a coy smile returning to your (s/c) face as you turned back to Lovecraft with the biggest, most pleading doe eyes you could manage, "Lovecraft," he simply hummed in response, "can you do that...thing you did a while back, partially activate your power or whatever you do?" He once again looked down at you, his dark eyes seeming to almost absorb the flickering light of the television, adding a small bit of sparkle to the deep sea color of them.

While he thought, you admired his eyes, coming back to reality when he spoke again, "That is a creative solution," he admitted, his arms still loosely draped around you while you smiled, "So will you help me?" He gave a careful nod, turning a bit pink it seemed, though you couldn't confirm in the darkness of the living room. Either way though, you took the compromise and pulled your clothes off, enjoying the way Lovecraft's dark eyes took in every inch of your (s/c) body as you stripped, staying in his lap as much as possible while you did. Then, you laid back on him and pressed your lips to his.

The dark-haired man still needed to perfect his kisses, but you didn't mind, the feeling of his altered arm coiling around your thigh, stroking the soft skin while you wriggled your hips and held the kiss until you needed air.

After that, you just laid on your partner's chest, raising your hips slightly so one of the thick tendrils could run along your entrance, sending a small ripple of electricity through you. The feeling increased when the appendage began to explore a bit, focusing its movements on the spots that got the most mewls and shudders out of you. Lovecraft might've been a bit oblivious to humanoid activities, but he sure did learn quickly.

Thankfully though, he didn't abuse that knew knowledge. He toyed with you, caressing your thigh and stroking you only until you were properly riled up into a panting mess of soft moans. Once you were gripping his shirt like you might burn up if you let go, he took the hint and gently pushed a tentacle into you.

The feeling of being full made you moan loudly, pushing yourself back onto him to drive him deeper to hit that sweet spot within you. He let you fuck yourself on him, watching you moan and mewl whenever he managed to hit those special spots.

Already, you were getting weak, each thrust of the tentacle sending a wave of heat through your body, clouding your mind with lust. The feeling increased when you felt a second appendage slither beneath you to grope at your breasts, another slipping between your slick-covered thighs to once again toy with that sensitive bundle of nerves that made you gasp and claw into his shirt tighter.

With so much attention to your sensitive areas, your body felt like it was on fire. Pleasure burned through your veins, turning your body to jelly. All the while, a bubble built in your stomach, increasing with each fresh wave of euphoria sent through you when Lovecraft hit your g-spot. Each wave continued to make you moan and hum lost in the tide of it until that bubble in your stomach finally burst, making you bury your face in your soulmate's neck as you came.

After that, the lightning bolts of pleasure ebbed, leaving your legs as stable as spaghetti noodles that gave out almost the moment Lovecraft retracted his tendrils. Without them, you let yourself turn into a puddle on his chest, quivering and completely satisfied after so long of working. So, without any other demands, you simply let your (e/c) eyes drift shut as grey light was beginning to seep in through the windows. It was a nice change of pace to fall asleep to the sounds of ocean documentaries as dawn approached.

#hp Lovecraft #bungo stray dogs #bsd #Lovecraft x reader #x reader #not sfw #ask #Lovecraft

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sevendeadlymorons · 3 years

Note

Hey I’m that one anon from a while back that sent those long ass paragraphs about Lilith and Simeon, remember me? Anyway I know I’m very late to the party, but some of the boys are either getting to much hate or too much love over here (in my opinion) so I made a pros and cons list for all of them, I’m sorry- (I’m warning you now this will be long but I’ll put it in bullet points so it’s a bit easier to read, just read it whenever your mentally ready lol)

Lucifer (I hate this man.)

Pros

He’d help a lot with getting your life together wether that be finding a job, choosing the right college or other shit like that

He’d make sure your working hard and getting everything done, which is both a blessing and a curse tbh

He would be the one to take the most care of you whenever your ill psychically

Cons

He would probably overwork you

Doesnt have much time to spend on you and doesn’t make a effort to find more time unless your getting really sad about it

Probably wouldn’t be the best of help through issues with mental illness (he just doesn’t strike me as that type, feel free to disagree)

His pride would cause some serious problems in relationships :/

Mammon (I love this man.)

Pros

He’s the “if your sad, I’m sad” kind of guy so he does whatever he can to put a smile on your face

Makes his affection towards you known once he’s comfortable enough, mostly through things like hugs and head pats tho

He shows off anything you make, and I mean anything (you gave him a drawing? After showing it to everyone he puts it on the fridge. You wrote something? He reads it to everyone then puts it in his notebook to reread later, I think you get where I’m going with this)

Cons

There would probably be some communication issues due to his tsundere nature and habit of ignoring you when he’s mad

He’d get super mad at you when your trying to help him financially, maybe it’s a ego thing or maybe he’s just tired of hearing it

While his possessiveness is cute at times he’d definitely get way to overbearing if you don’t force him to cool it

Levi (I kin this man.)

Pros

He’d try to set up designated hangout times (like Friday is movie night, Tuesday is for RPGs etc)

Wanna spend time with him but aren’t very into what he’s into? While it will be harder to bond with him because of this I think if you REALLY wanted to hang with him he’d at least try to meet you in the middle (like if you like sports he’ll offer to play wii sports lol)

Insecurities getting you down again? Well never fear, levi is here! He’d find characters with flaws similar to those you see in yourself to prove that they don’t really matter (and since he struggles with insecurity himself he’d know how you feel and be one of the best at helping you through them)

Cons

Even if he makes an effort to meet you in the middle if you have different interests he’d refuse to get into “normie” stuff

He’ll guilt trip you constantly, even if it’s not on purpose (“Oh your hanging out with Asmo today? I get it, of course you’d wanna hang out with somebody cool and perfect like Asmo and not a gross yucky otaku like me”)

You have to initiate almost everything Hugs? You hug first. Handholding? You reach out to him. Confessions? You seriously thought he’d be the one to confess first??

Satan

Pros

Similar to Lucifer he’d be good at helping you get your life together and putting you on the right track

Unlike Lucifer, he’d actively make time for date nights and/or hangouts multiple times a week wether your going out for dinner or reading in front of the fireplace

While he himself might not be best at helping with comfort in the moment, he’d be great to turn to if you needed a long time treatment (you need a therapist? He’s got the best three in your area that you can afford and he found some helpful things you can do in this book)

Cons

As stated previously, he’s not the best with comfort, which can be an issue if you need a friend/partner who can be your biggest source of comfort (I’m not saying he’ll do nothing, it’ll just be kinda awkward ig)

If you vent to him about something he’ll always offer advice and while that can be good, sometimes all you want is someone to listen to you and getting advice can be annoying in the moment

I feel like hanging out with him you’d rarely ever get to talk about pointless things, everything would be serious you know? And while serious and deep conversations are good for bonding, some people (myself included) need to be able to talk about dumb things without having it turn philosophical

Asmo

Pros

He’s the best at boosting your confidence, there’s no competition

He’s more into spontaneous outings (he suddenly got the urge to go shopping, your coming with right?)

You can talk about just about anything with him, no judgment and he’ll never speak a word of it to anyone else if you don’t want him to (although he may brag to his brothers that you told him your secrets)

High emotional IQ

Cons

He has set things of things he’s interested in and his idea of trying the things your into is doing whatever it is for about 5 seconds then deciding it’s not for him

He cares a lot about looks, I don’t mean he’ll hate you or insult you cause he thinks your ugly, I mean he’ll constantly try to do your makeup, hair, and nails and he’ll always say things like “Your hair is a bit messy today, did you brush it? Yes? Well not good enough, let me do it” and “your wearing that out? There’s nothing wrong with it, I just think you’d look a lot cuter in this” and if your anything like me, that’ll get on your nerves a lot

While he’s great with emotional issues, if it’s a problem with anything like school or your job he’ll have no solution to offer, all you’ll get is a “You can do it!” and a good luck kiss

Narcissistic, need I say more?

Beel

Pros

He’s the best person to vent to, no judgment and tons of hugs and comfort food

He’s a mom friend, no explanation needed

Very supportive and always concerned for your health

Your in trouble? Call beel, he’ll help you and make sure your home safe before questioning you and will only lecture you out of love (unlike a certain older brother that will lecture you because “Your tarnishing Diavlo’s reputation by acting out like this. Your an exchange student, you must abide by the rules and behave yourself.”)

Cons

Food is his answer to everything (Sad?Food. Injured? Food. School’s stressful? Food plus a little help studying) and while food can be good for comfort, sometimes you need him to provide more than a snack

He’s the opposite of Satan in the sense that he’ll almost never offer advice when you rant to him, he just assumes getting it all out is help enough and won’t offer much more then a hug and food

Not getting along with one of his brothers? “They can be a handful, but they’re great people once you learn to handle the chaos” yeah he rarely thinks what his brothers did is a big deal so he gives you advice on how to apologize and get past it and he’ll give you food

Belphie (he really does attract the mentally ill people huh-)

Cons

I feel like he’d be good for certain people with social anxiety and people who have issues with always being scared about being a bad person (“you think your a bad person and are becoming more and more toxic by the day? Well your a better person than Lucifer that’s for sure, wether or not your toxic were going to cuddle now get in bed” or “your worried everyone is constantly staring and judging you for everything you do? Well I don’t really care about what your wearing or the way you walk so I doubt they do either, can we go home now?” ((Side note, I experience both of these issues and his uncaring personality would calm me, which is why I think this one of his pros))

He just wouldn’t care about whatever type of life style you lead and as someone who’s constantly scared of being judged for their lifestyle this would be amazing (“you sleep all the time? Same let’s nap together” “You don’t eat very healthy? Whatever, it’s fine, can we sleep now?” ((although it is a double edged sword))

He gets a burst of energy and just does the most random things (you see that tree? He’s already climbed half way up it. That petting zoo? He’s already feeding the lambs. That store? He’s already spent 30 grim)

Cons

Just like his twin he thinks every problem has one solution, but instead of food he thinks the solution is sleep (your sick? Sleep is the best medicine. A lot of homework? If you sleep you don’t have to think about it.)

At some point he just doesn’t care enough, if you come to him with a serious issue he’ll half listen to you rant then pull you down to sleep

He teases you a lot, which is fine teasing is fun, but he takes it too far. Maybe he touched on something your insecure about or he was too merciless, whatever it was, he won’t apologize for it, he just thinks your being sensitive. If he brought up some bad memories he’ll consider it, but his way of apologizing is cuddling

He doesn’t wanna do something? You guys aren’t gonna do it. You don’t wanna do something? Too bad, he wants to so your gonna.

I’m sorry this is so long- I tried to shorten it I swear- but anyway if you disagree I’m with anything, I wanna hear what you think

And even tho Beel doesn’t get much screen time and more serious moments, I think his character is way more then hunger

Random but I wanna add that other then Levi I kin Tamaki from mha and Ranpo from bsd

Dude do you just like torturing poor college students? This is so much to read, I’m about to cry 😭

I agree with the Lucifer part actually! Tho I do kinda thing he’s be good emotion support in some ways, for me, anyway. I feel like he may lack empathy that is needed in a stable relationship. Yes, he may be able to tell you with shit and honestly, he’d book my doctors appointments when I’m too anxious too so yknow. But yeah

Also agree with mammon. He’s a jackass when he wants to be, and I know he may not mean it, but his words are still hurtful in a lot of ways and he just can’t convey those emotions that’re needed in a loving relationship. But he’s so sweet and will show you off so it’s all good~

As much as I love Levi, I agree. He manipulates and guilt trips you throughout the entire game. It can’t be healthy in relationships but that don’t stop me from loving that sweet otaku boy 😔🖤

I agree with Satan too. I don’t have much to say but he’s avatar of wrath for a reason, for a start, and he honestly looks like he’d prefer talking about books than that funny thing that happened in class that made you laugh earlier

Agreed with Asmo too. Sometimes he may just get overbearing and the narcissism and the constant need to make you look better and improve you may get irritating

I agree with Beel. I don’t think he can comprehend that food isn’t an answer to everything and as a person who doesn’t cope with food and relatively hates it, he won’t be any help to me emotionally. He’s so sweet but he just won’t give you that proper support

I love Belphie so so much but I absolutely agree. He’s one of the most unbothered brothers who won’t care what you look like, yes, but that also means compliments may come rarely and like his twin, “sleep is the answer to everything” I can admit I like to sleep but I have a manic side that comes with insomnia and if he’s dragging me down and not letting me move and I just cannot sleep, I’m gonna get irritated and pissed off.

This got a bit long on my end too. I just really liked how you worded this and it was fun to see pros and cons of the ‘perfect’ brothers

I think Beel is more than food too, but I just don’t particularly like him either way cuz I’m not really a foodie so I can’t relate with him lmao

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dinosaurtsukki · 4 years

Text

BSD x university au hc’s | pt. 1

hi i am an absolute slut for university au’s in case you couldn’t tell so i just had to write some for my first BSD post. also this is going to be slightly ooc because i am a crackhead

check out pt. 2 here

***********************************************

Atsushi Nakajima:

he’s definitely the kind of guy who still had no idea what he’d take up in university even after he was accepted

either wants to not major in anything at all or just major in everything because he’s also scared that he’ll eventually not like what he’s majoring in

so for his first two years you’d probably find him jumping around different classes

also he still calls the professors ‘teacher ____’ like a high school student and everyone laughs but thinks its cute

eventually, because of his *cough cough* traumatic childhood he decided he wanted to help children by becoming a guidance counselor

he ends up taking Child Psychology and bOY does he love it so much

well he actually just loves all of his classes because Learning is Fun

although because of his *cough cough* traumatic childhood he’s the one in class that people are all like 👀👀

atsushi: *talking about children’s responses to fear and emotional abuse by talking about his own emotional abuse*

the professor, under their breath: wait, do you need help??

i can definitely see atsushi as a Roommate of the Year kind of guy. he’s just so polite and tidy with his room. also he’d definitely be the type to take care of plants inside the dorm room and put them on the windowsill

in terms of extracurricular activities, he’s definitely a sporty type of person so i can see him joining a varsity (something like Frisbee because he likes things that go whoooosh) but he’d probably join a student org that does stuff like community outreach

because of all this, he is a Very Busy Boy but his friends do manage to drag him out to parties once in a while

although atsushi would probably sit in a corner and drink only one beer for the entire night

he’s notorious for helping drunk people though. most of the time he’ll be putting blankets on people and making them drink water

if he knew how to drive he’d definitely be the designated driver

Akiko Yosano:

omg i’m so excited for this i love yosano so much

she’s the friend who’s just effortlessly awesome all around and a fricking MED STUDENT to top it all off

she gets a bit too excited when it’s dissection time but it’s alright she has good intentions

probably the only one in your class who doesn’t go and throw up whenever a cadaver is being used (actually do they still use cadavers i have absolutely no idea)

she also interns at the local hospital as part of her degree program but OMG yosano will not stop telling disgusting stories about the patients she’s had

everyone: *eating lunch peacefully in the dining hall*

yosano: so i pulled a guy’s toe out of a meat grinder this morning

everyone: sHUT UP

for some reason she still has a social life despite being a med student and it’s one of the mysteries of life i guess

yosano LOVES going out clubbing on friday nights. if you have the fortune of being her roommate, be prepared for make-overs and being dragged with her out to the city

she’s such a social butterfly like at every bar you go to, the bartender knows her name and her regular order. she’d probably end the night befriending a couple more people

also she’s amazing at karaoke i kid you not

as for extracurricular life, i don’t think yosano’s the type to join an org that’s related to her major cause like ‘what’s the point?’

instead, she’d probably go wherever her friends are because to her, she’ll enjoy any activity as long as she’s with people she loves

but when it comes to her own interests, i can definitely see yosano as someone who loves the outdoors, especially hiking after having to be cooped up inside clinics

it just makes her love and appreciate the value of life more

Kunikida Doppo:

ok, i KNOW he was a math teacher before he joined the ADA bUT i can’t help but think of him as a political science major ??

i can definitely imagine kunikida as someone who’d want to become a lawyer someday and would take political science as a pre-law

he does like the idea of following in the footsteps of great men but omg kunikida would absolutely hate the exclusivity of white, male political theorists

he is such a good student except for when his professor has some sketchy values then kunikida will !! fight him !! every !! chance !! he gets !!

raises his hand constantly to contradict his professor if they even tRY to defend thomas hobbes and authoritarianism

but other than that he’s probably the most diligent student out there. kunikida genuinely enjoys doing the readings for class and writing essays

also has such a balanced schedule that he can make time for anything and everything

except for when his friends dazai drag him out to parties and get a social life

despite how rigid he is, kunikida has absolutely no problem helping out others with learning. he often holds study sessions in his dorm room or in the library before exams

he also likes to volunteer in tutorial centers because he’s just like that

OH OH some of his ‘students’ suggested that he make crash-course type videos for political science and it took some convincing but eventually kunikida decided to go for it

he’s not the most tech savvy or photogenic person so it took some time for him to get used to things but after seeing all the comments from people who benefited from it, he decided to continue with his crash course videos

whether or not he’s the best or worst roommate is completely up to you. if you like someone who’ll basically micromanage your life from your daily schedule to your study habits, you’ll absolutely love him

he doesn’t like to go out for parties that much but he will if his friends convince him enough (kunikida’s an utter lightweight when it comes to drinking though)

Osamu Dazai:

i genuinely have a hard time thinking about what this guy’s major would be and tbh even his friends have been wondering what dazai’s major was for TWO YEARS

that’s because he keeps taking the most random ass classes like Basic Pottery or Intro to Molecular Biology in the same semester

idk how he even plans to graduate at this point

although to be honest, i can definitely see him as a philosophy major despite the fact that i LOATHE every male classmate i’ve had who’s a philosophy major (idk they’re always so condescending)

i feel like dazai’s just taking that because it’s somewhat challenging for him but to him, university life is just more of crazy experiences rather than learning

and oh my god has he gotten up to the weirdest shit

the number of times he had to climb gates or sleep on benches at three a.m. is too many to count

dazai also loves volunteering for random things like people’s thesis projects (once, he offered to be a snake venom tester to a bio student and they told him that was illegal) or even being the school’s mascot in games

also he and kunikida probably met each other in freshman year at an intro to philosophy class and oh my god did dazai get on his nerves

what’s worse was that they had to work on a group project together and dazai was MIA most of the time and it drove kunikida crazy

that is until dazai showed up last minute to pull an all-nighter with him for their paper and kunikida just couldn’t help but be impressed by dazai’s ~~intellect~~

they don’t exactly get along but they do have some mutual respect for each other enough to work on projects well

omg if dazai ends up being your roommate I WISH YOU LUCK

the first time you walked into your room dazai was microwaving a metal bowl and you had to run to stop it in time

also he has a tendency to wear his headphones and sing his favorite double suicide song out loud

kunikida please come pick him up

Edogawa Ranpo:

i love this one man so much i swear to god

ranpo is definitely the kind of person who just didn’t like school so when college applications came around he was just like ‘why bother though ???’

his friends did convince him by saying that he wouldn’t have to do subjects he wouldn’t like and just focus on his major (this is a lie btw)

is it a surprise that ranpo would choose forensic science ?? NO

he thinks its cool that he can learn about something he’s already super good at and it just gets him really pumped up to show off how good he is

LOVES getting praised by his classmates and professors

ranpo probably thinks lectures are boring as hell so sometimes he just,,, doesn’t,,, come,,, to class

if attendance IS required you can bet he’s bringing snacks and game consoles with him and sitting WAAAAY in the back of the room

Mukbang at a Lecture Hall with Edogawa Ranpo

his classmates think its cute that he puts on glasses before doing exams or answering his prof’s questions as a way to hype himself up

everyone calls him ‘The Greatest Detective’ and ranpo LOVES IT

despite that, he’s not too overly social he just likes being with his close group of friends UwU

he’s also someone you can drag around to places like the fair or an aquarium, but he’s not into clubbing or drinking for that matter

he DOES enjoy seeing his friends get drunk and mess with them though

ranpo isn’t into joining student organizations BUT he gets scouted a lot by detective agencies and he likes interning for them

i’m saying detective agencies because police are gross

ranpo did end up joining a baking club with the assumption that he would just be EATING the cake and not BAKING the cake

yeah he was just there for less than half a semester

***********************************************

taglist (check out my post for details on being part of my taglist): @waitforitillwritemywayout @tpwkatsumu @laure-chan

#bungou stray dogs #bsd #atsushi nakajima #akiko yosano #kunikida doppo #osamu dazai #edogawa ranpo #bsd headcanons #bungou stray dogs headcanons #bsd writing #bungou stray dogs writing #bsd university au #bungou stray dogs university au #bsd imagines #bungou stray dogs imagines #bsd scenarios #bungou stray dogs scenarios

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linklethehistorian · 3 years

Note

Hello, do you know how can I watch bungou stray dogs stage play?!!

do you have the link?!!

Hello! Our dear Popopretty helped me to buy a ticket, because she is very kind, so I can’t say I know all of the steps myself, but if you’re interested in buying one for the Fifteen stage play, the details are here on this page, about the kind of streams available and the bonuses they come with (if you live in Japan and can get them), and the actual place to buy the tickets is here: https://eplus.jp/sf/word/0000121779

If you want the best experience, I would recommend the multi-camera filming that focuses on all characters, but I will leave that up to your personal tastes, as they also have ones that focus on just Dazai, or just Chuuya, or just a plain zoomed out version of the entire stage.

I have had the great fortune of watching both the zoomed out version (which Popo-san bought herself and offered me to watch), and will also be watching the multi-camera one on the 24th (which I gave the money to Popo-san to buy for me).

The multi-camera will run you about $45-ish in yen with fees, I think, the other specialty focuses will run you about the same I believe, and the fixed zoomed-out camera will run you phenomenally less, if memory serves.

If you know how to navigate the site and buy the tickets, I can gladly help you afterwards with reaching the stream, if you have any confusion. You will have to create an account on the site first to view it, though. Again, Popo-san let me borrow her account in my case, though, so I do not know exactly how signing up there works. I’m sorry about that. I’m sure it isn’t hard, though.

Ordinarily, I would say if you can’t read Japanese, go to Popo-san, but I do know that at the moment she is currently away as far as it can be understood, and I don’t feel quite right about sending more people to her. Granted, she did make a post saying she would be willing to help people do it some time ago, and that’s how I reached out to her about it in the first place, buuut...yeah, I’m not sure if that still stands given current circumstances.

I will try to help you with the steps as best I can if you would like, just be aware that I understand spoken Japanese much better than written at the moment, so I may not be the best at navigating the parts of the site I didn’t have experience with.

Oh, and once more, do be aware that the Fifteen stage play does not have English subtitles; therefore, if you do not understand spoken Japanese, you won’t get much out of it beyond getting to hear/see them. I’ll be subtitling a recording of it myself at a later date, so don’t worry even if you can’t understand it, or can’t afford it. 💖 But if you can, I highly recommend you support Asagiri-sensei and the rest of the BSD team and buy a ticket to experience the raw version!!!

Hope this helps! If you have any more questions, you can send another ask or DM me! Always happy to help.

Hope you enjoy the show!

Edit: Ah, it seems Popo-san has answered you as well. Well, I hope this is still of help to you somehow.

#linklethehistorian #fifteen #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd stage play #bsd novels #bsd anime #ask #nishiku #thank you for the question #i hope this was helpful #how to buy tickets #thoughts #reply #my thoughts.

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leonawriter · 3 years

Text

My Personal Takes on Stormbringer:

Without a full and accurate translation to go through in one sitting, it’s still hard to get a handle on things properly. That said, thank you to everyone who’s working on it.

Now.

(please note all quotes are my memory of translations I have read, and are not verbatim.)

-Asagiri, please, you do not need to make so many coding analogies with regards to Chuuya and Verlaine. They don’t work.

-It often feels - not just in this book but also in 55 Minutes, where there are tight restrictions on a time travel ability - that Asagiri limits abilities based on how scientifically accurate they are. However, this doesn’t make sense! why should it! Literature should be an expression of freedom. There should be rules - the same way the Page has rules - but in the sense of Magic A is Magic A. You make up the rules and then you don’t break them in future. Why have Kunikida able to create something with a mass heavier than a piece of paper out of a page of his notebook, but then say you can’t do [x/y/z] because it’s scientifically unviable?

-I have no issue with how skk treat each other. they are chaos teens. let them be. like... this is the beginning of their actual trust. they’re also in the mafia, and in a dark time in their lives. it’s fine. (it isn’t, but at the same time, it kinda is.)

-I feel like Chuuya taking things from other people and making that thing “his” fits him as a character? he had nothing before, so when you have nothing, all you have is what people give you. If someone gives him a bike, then that bike is his now. He has to learn to look after it, love it, and respect it, and he’ll remember that friend by it. Same goes for pretty much anything else. Also, it’s a show of how well Chuuya adapts to things, and what things he chooses to pick up.

-The hat. I do not like how the hat was treated. Making it into the key that helps Chuuya be able to activate Corruption cheapens the meaning and weight of having been given the hat as a memento of the first person who told him to live as a human being. Why not have the hat be a reminder of his humanity in a purely sentimental way? I’m going to ignore anything canon about this and just say it’s sentimental. Which, like, it could have been a safety blanket type thing, not pseudo-science.

-The coding in Chuuya’s body is a bit... of a reach? How do you put that in there? I don’t get it. Just say that there’s a possibility he might die if he uses Corruption, or that he’ll never become “Chuuya” again. That he’d lose himself utterly. The log history can be either on a chip (insert Dazai making “lost dog, if found return to the mafia” jokes here) or on something else that could easily be destroyed during the course of the story (or not).

-Dazai living in the shipping container reads to me like an extreme version of “I do not want to be found I do not want to be helped I am worthless trash and what’s the point in having an actual home if I plan on dying any day anyway.” Verlaine asks what drove him there, and Dazai says “you” and tbh that offers up so many questions (like, was the shipping container thing recent, was it temporary, or what). There’s the possibility that Dazai doesn’t always live there, because otherwise he’d suffer from hypothermia and get pneumonia in the winter! But above all, Mori had nothing to do with this. He was probably terrified to go too close in case he got killed. Stop saying Dazai lives here because “poor baby was abused :(” that sure was not it.

-Dazai goes all this way - plotting for ages, since before the beginning of the book, having been number one on Verlaine’s hit list, just to get the truth about Chuuya’s humanity and to preserve it - because “I want to see Chuuya suffer as a human being” is him saying he doesn’t want to see Chuuya become like him, or inhuman, because that’s not Chuuya. (dude, there ain’t a straight explanation for this...)

-following on from the previous, Dazai refusing to just let things be the moment he realises that it’d mean double suiciding with Chuuya. I personally see that as a shippy moment because Dazai had already given up on Chuuya being alive (if I read the translation right) and in that case, dying would just be letting go. But Mori says “yeah but I don’t think he’s dead yet?” and that, along with the “double suicide” thing, makes Dazai go “absolutely NOT.”

OK a related thing - as far as I remember, when IRL Dazai attempted double suicide, right up until his actual death it would result in either a failure or... his partner dying and him surviving. The cold potential of this happening in BSD if Dazai had just given up reminded me of that.

-Regardless of my thoughts on how it was handled, Stormbringer reinforced my previous ideas about how Chuuya basically IS Arahabaki. It also suggests that Arahabaki was more of a sentient ability than a true “god” but... that’s fine. For me, all I cared about was that all those “Arahabaki is an evil being that is constantly trying to take over Chuuya and Corruption is Arahabaki being let out” takes are not true. It’s... basically Chuuya taking the lid off his power. I joked at one point that Corruption is Chuuya going “I’m so pissed off I’m gonna kick the door open and throw away the key” and Dazai going “go for it babe, I got your key.”

-Rimbaud and Verlaine are... very complicated characters? They’re not easy to get a handle on. I sometimes find myself liking them and sometimes find myself disliking them, and that’s something that’ll be easier when I have a full translation available - and one of Fifteen. Rimbaud was held back by seeing Chuuya, at first, as nothing more than an empty vessel to Arahabaki’s power, while Verlaine was so taken over by grief without understanding how to handle that, that he became a monster up until the end of the story. Neither of them were good people. That said, their relationship to each other? It’s very complicated and reminds me of their IRL selves to a point but without the skeevy nature and without it going so far, so kudos to that.

-Adam. Knowing his creator was a ten year old girl makes so much sense when you look at the things he says and does. He doesn’t get so much. He’s very logical, but doesn’t understand that a game of billiards isn't as much of an icebreaker as he thinks it should be. Surprised by bubble gum. Games like “strange things humans do” are very much like the word games kids play in the car.

-Verlaine being the fifth executive was something I did not predict at all, whatsoever, and I can’t stop thinking about it. Like... how did he get to that point. Only so much can be said in a few paragraphs (it seems) of “this is [x] number of years in the future where Chuuya’s an executive now.”

The last we see of him, he’s overcome by grief, hatless, and he seems to have only just realised how much he wished he could return what Rimbaud gave to him. (Ironically, by being able to grieve like that, it shows that he is capable of what he thinks he can’t do - same as Dazai.)

But how does he become an executive? Do they come to him slowly at first, and they gradually build up trust? Does he stay in contact with Chuuya? Do they see each other properly as brothers now, or not? I can’t help but feel that as it’s a long time - six years, in fact - between Stormbringer and canon, some bond of trust must have been built. The mafia protects Verlaine from the authorities and from the outside world just the same as Kouyou says that she wants to do for Kyouka, and the same as they’re there for Chuuya, too. So. A Verlaine who trains the mafia’s best assassins not because he’s forced into it, but because he feels the same loneliness as Chuuya, and finds that it helps? A Verlaine who learns slowly that he can care about more people than just Rimbaud and Chuuya? Holy shit yes please. A Verlaine who is loyal and protective and who you should be glad is in a (probably) gilded prison of the mafia’s basement, because otherwise he would actually do so many things to those who would harm his family.

Let’s just say - if I think of Arahabaki as a guardian or protector god who is just plain destructive because it can’t help that, then Chuuya and Verlaine looking and acting in similar ways because they share that same “parent” in a sense, makes sense. They are no longer just Arahabaki, they’re “Chuuya” and “Verlaine” - but they also share traits such as “Papa Wolf” and “lonely” and “violent,” among others.

-At least twice, pre-Soukoku Dazai and Chuuya refer to how they’re constantly thinking of each other. No, they don’t mean in positive ways, but they’re chaos teens and it’s still strong emotion. Chuuya mentions how he’s thought of at least 190 ways to punish Dazai for the things that he does (which also implies how their relationship is equal, and Dazai doesn’t call all the shots, and doesn’t get away with everything scot-free), and Dazai says that Verlaine can’t possibly win against him, because Dazai “spends all of his time, waking and sleeping, thinking of ways to annoy and harass Chuuya,” (quote not perfect.)

We also have Chuuya having Dazai appear to him first in his hallucinations, which I see as Chuuya’s inner Dazai-voice saying all the worst things, and ironically not actually saying or meaning things that would get across what real Dazai would want him to feel; in other words, that’s Chuuya’s view of him, or his mind searching for the one person he’d believe it to realistically come from.

As well, Dazai saying “there’s no way Chuuya could be an artificially constructed personality, because no one could create a personality that I [hate/that annoys me] so much.” Which, like... sure... you tell yourself that, kid...

Basically, they’re all the kinds of things that teenagers who don’t really get how strong feelings like these work yet, who are still figuring themselves (and their orientations, probably) out, would say if they don’t even like that other person that much, but they’re still attracted to them. A strong “why does it have to be THEM?” haha. And yet, as others have pointed out, Chuuya seems more on the oblivious side than Dazai, since as said, Dazai goes to all this effort and seems fond (but only when Chuuya’s not looking, dumbass) but Chuuya just... doesn’t get it.

A shorter summary of my thoughts and feelings?

Chuuya suffers, but is ultimately happier for it no matter whether he’s one of the clones or whether he’s the original (it’s arguable either way, and I don’t mind either way) as he’s still Chuuya. His bond with the mafia is also stronger than so many people think it is. They’re literally his adopted family. Even if he chose to leave, he’d still see them as family. I can’t see him leaving. He’s just... they’re family... don’t tear them apart...

The skk is strong, no matter what people say, because this is the start and it’s the end of their first year in the mafia and it’s not supposed to be a healthy time, for fuck’s sake. They’re both all sorts of messed up. They’re allowed to be. This is a time when that’s kinda the point of the book. But yeah, the trust and the bond is real.

Verlaine. I am now fascinated by Verlaine. I was so sure before the spoilers and translations came out that I’d hate him. I no longer do. He confuses me but I NEED TO KNOW MORE.

#bsd #Stormbringer spoilers #bsd spoilers #all opinions are the OP's #you don't have to agree but they are mine #facts are just facts tho #and this got long whoops #may add more if I remember more later

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rokutouxei · 4 years

Text

in a way that would make you proud

bungou stray dogs dazai osamu (& oda sakunosuke) | T | 2913 | [ao3]

warnings: post-canon, alcohol, dazai-typical suicide references, implied/referenced self-harm, oda is still dead, also everything is in lowercase. spoilers for dark era / 黒の時代.

notes: this was supposed to be for dazai’s birthday, but i started it way too late. i didn’t want to rush it, so i took a week to write it and now it’s just a long angsty love letter from me to him (in a way.) + first bsd fic so i wanted to make a good impression LOL

summary:

dazai didn’t think he’d live up to the age of 23. hell, he didn’t think he’d make it to 18. he was sure, at 10, that he would be dead by 15. everyday he would wake up wondering (hoping? believing?) that he’d be dead the next day. he never really does. alternatively: june 19th, every year, just feels like a long, long night.

(midnight.)

dazai doesn’t celebrate his birthdays, at least in his head. it’s just another likely-humid day in the country’s short rainy season. every birthday is just another reminder, no, a testament to a year of failed attempts to take his own life. it’s miserable at the worst. today, it’s just numb. he doesn’t even wake up feeling any different.

but he doesn’t let that train of thought stop everyone around him for celebrating for him.

dazai considers, for the first few minutes after waking up, skipping work altogether. it’s not going to be surprising, or anything new from him, really. and an earful from kunikida is just going to be cheap fun for the next day. but as dawn slowly gave way to the sun, he figured dealing with the pleasantries (as in, the “surprise” party that had stopped being a surprise a week ago) and sitting in his office chair would make him feel a little more put-together, at least more than just lying in his futon with his new roommate, a growing stack of empty cans of ready-to-eat crab.

dazai sighs, shuffles out of his bed, hearing the imaginary shackles that bind him there clink around.

(one o’clock am)

besides, the members of the armed detective agency think of themselves a small family at best, and for families, birthdays are special. (dazai hums this to himself on his way to work, like it’s a fact he’s learned, not a lived experience.) he’s spent the past two years carving himself a spot in this mismatched little group, and even if his space feels just as impermanent as anything he’s ever wanted, it’s still a place. he isn’t going to lose all that hard work over a random day.

budget is tight this quarter, but when he gets to the office, he’s welcomed with, salad, karaage… and even crab! there’s no alcohol because kunikida is too strait-laced for that and he insists there’s still work to be done. dazai whines and makes complaints, as everyone expects him to.

most of his colleagues have small gifts for him, like an orange from kenji, a candy from ranpo (quickly taken back), his favorite bandages from yosano… nothing really spectacular. kunikida gets him nothing, but the wordless glance they share with each other says otherwise.

atsushi feels indebted to his mentor, so he splurges to get him something nice: a scarf. which is hilarious, to say the least, considering it’s basically summer, but since scarves are off-season they are cheaper, and that’s the only way atsushi can afford something as stunning and high-quality as this—a nice thick cotton one in a deep blue shade. he passes the credit to kyouka for choosing which to get and for wrapping it nicely.

dazai’s eyes flicker with something for a moment before it’s gone. he thanks them with as much heart as he can muster, then does his usual dramatics. asks if the scarf is sturdy enough to hang himself with.

atsushi begs him please don’t and dazai feels something squeeze in his heart.

after the feast, the rest of the day goes as it usually does: dazai smiles and makes jokes and laughs and drives kunikida batshit insane. it’s just a normal day at the armed detective agency office.

just not for dazai.

(two o’clock am)

a work day is still a work day, though, and there’s no getting away from kunikida even on “personal holidays.” there are reports to be written and things to be followed up. dazai isn’t being efficient about it, but he still does his share—at least enough so that it’s even a bit fair for his begrudging partner, who is always gentler to him on this particular day.

an extra serving of patience—that’s what kunikida always gives him on his birthday. and even on this year, dazai’s quick to claim it; two hours before the work day officially ends, he’s already packing up to leave.

not that kunikida’s screaming will really stop him, but it feels a little better when dazai can afford to leave a little early with permission.

atsushi’s a little surprised no one stops dazai from leaving, but he asks no more questions when kyouka shushes him. kunikida only tsks when dazai is out of the building.

(three o’clock am)

out of the office and back into the rush of the city, dazai’s feet bring him to a beeline to that place, like on autopilot. he’s humming all the way there but his brain’s only echoing a sort of static. that is, until the imagery of sitting next to empty seats begins to burrow into the haze of his mind—and it hurts. numbness is okay, but pain? it hurts the same way squeezing into old shoes that no longer fit you does.

and dazai hates it.

so he steels himself, says, no one’s there anymore, insists, there is nothing to come back to.

even if he knows he will find himself there again one day. he always, inevitably does.

but not today. that’s not where he feels safe enough to break.

this time, dazai’s a little more purposeful, a little more awake.

he drops by a liquor store to get whiskey. just goes up the aisle and picks up the first one he finds. it’s not like he’ll remember what it tastes, anyway. the cashier doesn’t make small talk. dazai smiles at them anyway.

he contemplates buying flowers, but he feels a pang of pain at gifting something that’ll die before he does.

and so he begins the long, slow walk to the seaside.

(yesterday, today, and tomorrow)

yokohama is too familiar to him now. he’s lived here too long.

every street bears his secrets. every crosswalk has a memory.

every inch of the city has a weight.

when he was still learning to maneuver the ins and outs of the city, a little boy barely filling in the hollow of his new uniform, there was darkness everywhere. everywhere he entered, everywhere he left. dazai was sure the darkness would quickly consume him.

dazai didn’t think he’d live up to the age of 22.

hell, he didn’t think he’d make it to 18. he was sure, at 10, that he would be dead by 15.

every day he wakes up wondering (hoping? believing?) if he’d be dead the next day.

today, he’s 23.

odasaku died at 23.

dazai should have died at 15.

or better yet, it should have been him who died at the hands of mimic.

he’s sure.

(four o’clock am)

even if odasaku had acted of his own accord, he was still given a mafia’s burial. the details, of course, were hushed: it didn’t matter that mori had orchestrated the entire deal with gide. what mattered is that odasaku’s death had led to the granting of their prized business permit.

a piece of paper in a stupid black envelope.

in the months between the port mafia and the armed detective agency, dazai struggled to find a way to put into words what the experience left in him. it was like it was him who was shot clean through the chest. he was walking down the path the end of odasaku’s life had pointed him towards, but then what? at what cost? to what end?

his friend’s death left no trace of him, his private files burnt, the ones still useful to the mafia kept in confidential locations. (dazai knows where everything is.) to the outside world, all that was left of the man named oda sakunosuke was a headstone, on a rather beautiful gravesite on a fancy cemetery overlooking the sea.

it was dazai who overlooked all these tiny details, even while on the run, in hiding.

honor the dead, they said.

he figured it was the least he could do.

dazai always felt like he could offer too little to the only man who ever really knew him.

so now he offers it all, stumbling along the unfinished path of a dead man, even if he didn’t know where was he going with it.

“ya, odasaku.”

(ten minutes past four)

not much of anyone comes to visit this grave, really. ango, maybe, dazai bitterly thinks, but he’s gladly never had the chance to see the man here. (he hopes he never gets to.)

because this is the only place dazai truly feels quiet.

he doesn’t really stop thinking. he doesn’t know how to. there’s always too many things to consider, so much going on, and even when his brain lets go of the tangible, of the here and now, there are other things for thoughts to latch on to, like old wounds that suddenly seem fresh if dazai closes his eyes hard enough, or the phantom sensation of a noose, or the sudden realization that he’s drowning, just not in water.

dazai’s long mastered the art of keeping his forever-rushing thoughts in neat compartments. he doesn’t usually lose track of his spirals, except when he’s here.

here he counts down, 18, goodbye, 17, 16, 15, hello, he is young again, he isn’t wounded in the places that hurt when he’s alone, he is meeting odasaku for the first time. (he’s walking down the port mafia headquarters and he sees him, and something deep within him, six years away from the future, shouts: don’t! spare him! meeting you is a death sentence!)

and then he is meeting him for the last time.

like freshly pumped from a weakened heart, stuttering, begging to live, the spurting red blood is still warm. it sends those in dazai’s veins boiling. there is no rationalizing here—no amount of reason brings the dead back.

he knows that.

but dazai breathes easier when the lines are less muddled, and he can point the criminal to the judge and sentence them to death.

it was mori ougai, sir.

it was gide, sir.

it was me, sir.

it was him—it was oda sakunosuke’s fault, sir.

(it was him who pulled me out of the dark, sir. who forced me to deal with the mess we made, sir. who told me i belonged here, sir.

i don’t want to be here, sir.)

it is only here where dazai’s mask really breaks.

shatters cleanly in half, then falls down with a thump on sacred ground.

(twenty minutes past four)

dazai rests his back against the headstone, staring out at the ocean, the sunset dyeing yokohama bay a lovely vermillion. the tendrils of loneliness cling to his limbs like they’ve sprouted out of the ground, when really it’s from deep inside his heart.

only here does dazai really feel seen: his transparency only to a man buried six feet under.

dazai’s given up on it, now. it doesn’t matter that people don’t “get” him, as long as he’s able to do what he has to do. this is a luxury is long past him, now that he’s slipped into someone else’s unfulfilled dream. he’s trying to be what odasaku would have wanted himself to be.

if there’s one thing, one thing he would ask for, it’s faith: and with his subordinates’ faith comes success—and that’s all he needs.

just bargaining chips he’s collecting under his pillow as he says, “look, odasaku, i’m doing good, look, cruel god, this duty’s given my life meaning, forgive me, forgive him.”

meaning?

no, there is no meaning here, no metaphor, no hope.

just a gaping void.

(four thirty am)

the sun slips under the bay and the sky is a beautiful lavender-violet; the sea breeze makes him chill. rainclouds have begun to crawl over the horizon, hiding the moon.

dazai feels old. too old. he feels too old for someone in a body that’s only twenty-three. he never expected this body to last as long as it has. he was ready to retire at ages much younger than this. his hands crave death with the same vigor his mind races to write strategies for situations where he survives. now, he lives in a world he never expected or planned to be a part of.

he wonders if odasaku felt this exhausted when he was at this age.

all dazai does here is think. until the thoughts stop.

the cap of the whiskey bottle is screwed on tight but when it opens, the smell takes him back to bar lupin so fast that his head spins. dazai takes a swig of the whiskey straight from the bottle.

and he was right. he can’t taste it.

only blood. the blood in his hands, the way it stained his bandages, odasaku’s dead weight, the red pooling on the floor. dazai only tastes blood in his mouth.

blood’s always been the only thing that’s filled him.

and he hated it. felt it thrumming underneath his wrist, his jugular, blood that said try as you might, you insolent mortal, you can’t die, that so many times he’s tried to wring himself dry of it.

he never does.

because if he loses his blood what else would be left in him?

odasaku once told him that the emptiness inside of him will never be filled, not by anything that he’ll ever find in this world. and odasaku was right—dazai knew. dazai knew long before he was told. no amount of money, no amount of power, no amount of whatever will get him out of the edge of the cliff he was dangling on.

for a moment, dazai wonders if odasaku knew and was so sure of it because odasaku was aware he was taking it away with him.

whatever “it” was.

(the sun begins to paint the sky violet)

dazai remembers an afternoon a million years ago when the hollow in his heart didn’t have the shape of oda sakunosuke’s hands. ozaki kouyou was teaching two jittery fifteen-year-olds about literature.

well, just one, but dazai’s really only there because he wanted to mess with chuuya, and kouyou spotted him first.

with not a single year of formal education on chuuya’s back, kouyou’s work with him was nearly tenfold. she was tasked not only to refine his abilities (he’s good, but he can be better, a touch of elegance will not hurt), but also teach him other valuable skills.

being part of the organization, after all, was not just about violence and murder.

dazai knew that. chuuya was yet to learn it.

arithmetic and history and science—the redhead had tutors for that. but literature, kouyou had taken into her hands.

it’s not the text itself, or the language and vocabulary, she said, what we’re honing here is critical thinking, and the bits of philosophical thought to be picked up that’ll shape you into a brilliant mafioso in the future. pretty words, dazai thought. she sipped tea while chuuya read. she tapped his back with a fan when his posture broke and he began to slouch.

chuuya read the books religiously, without complaint (at least not in front of kouyou). dazai never really understood all this. he let his mind wander. why didn’t she just let the boy read war strategy books—the kind mori made him devour? oh, but chuuya wasn’t really a strategist, and well, he’s obedient, that’s why he’s a dog—

the silence of the afternoon was broken by chuuya getting up to ask about a phrase he didn’t understand. kouyou smiled in a way that left dazai unsettled. and somehow, that afternoon was burned into dazai’s memory like it was something he mustn’t forget.

the phrase was 無我夢中.

to be totally absorbed in something, you lose yourself in it.

that is, dazai’s long known what he’s doing, he just doesn’t want to admit it.

(the sky is a weak light blue, giving way to an inevitable morning)

the whiskey bottle is empty now. dazai shifts to stuff it into his little paper bag of gifts when his fingers graze the soft cotton of his new scarf, deep blue.

save the weak, protect the orphans, he was told.

he pulls the scarf out and clutches it in his hands.

feels its weight. imagines rope.

please don’t, atsushi said earlier.

and dazai is trying, and trying, and trying, and—

is it enough?

is he enough?

will he be enough?

“odasaku,” dazai says, hums it under his breath like the wind will take it, bring it where he needs it to go, “would i have made you proud?”

(dawn)

fat droplets begin to pour out of the dark clouds. there are no stars out. yokohama glimmers under the thin sheen of rain.

nearby, a child hurriedly grasps his father’s free hand as he digs into his bag for an umbrella, and the little boy goes, “papa, the sky is crying!”

and maybe the sky is. maybe the man sitting behind the gravestone is.

but there are two sure things about rain:

one, that it washes away any and all things if you let it.

two, that it will always, somehow, at some point, stop.

(morning’s just beginning)

dazai gets up on his feet, with just a little sway from all the alcohol. but the night’s still young, and there are better stuff to drink than whiskey out of a bottle. he looks back at the grave with eyes promising he’ll be back soon, a little better, a little wiser than he is, and then off he goes, into the city he far-too-well knows.

maybe he can bother someone into treating him to some good, expensive, old-fashioned wine.

#bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd #osamu dazai #dazai osamu #bsd dazai #文豪ストレイドッグス #文スト #um hi i dont know the tags #also look at me projecting onto dazai going PARKOUR at every sad statement #fic #i've been in otome game hell for a bit so i haven't written anything not x reader in a while so #THIS WAS FUN #also i forgot to add! 無我夢中 is mugamuchuu. :)

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