not to go into the same spiral i do every few months about the state of comics and how DC basically ruined their entire 80+ year continuity with reboots but like. i really am going to spend the rest of my life mourning preboot tim drake... as lana said, i think i'll miss you forever <3

i am an athena cykes defender forever and ever until the day i die but god. somewhere out there there is a universe where apollo justice got actual follow through and it kills me that i am not living in it

something so special about watching old tv shows do shit that would be called queerbait if they came out today but they predate queerbaiting as a phenomenon so you know it's genuine home-grown all-natural free-range homoeroticism

Cleared out my inbox and drafts of... quite a few things, bunch of anons, memes, dashboard games and prompts I've long forgotten. Not proud of it but since it's been so long and some of the people who sent them aren't around anymore, might as well clean up and start afresh.

If someone had told me months ago when I started Foul Lady Fortune that I would still be obsessing over it now and thinking too much about characters that aren't even the main characters in the strictest sense (the most at least)... I would not have been surprised. I have a history.

hello /waves shyly/ i am the anon who recommended red as a timkon song, and i just want to tell you too that i think The Lucky One by taylor swift too fits naive, just-out-of-the-test-tube, teen celeb kon sooooo well!! esp the last verse of the song where it goes "and they still tell the legend of how you disappeared / how you took the money and your dignity / and got the hell out" > parallels his decision to go live with the kents in smallville and completely change his image as well.

i like to think the image change (while we all lament t-shirt kon sometimes) was necessary for kon to truly examine who he wanted to be. and it only grew after he died and came back (re: adventure comics 2009 where he makes lists of what would superman/lex do). and idk i just feel like this song encapsulates that!!

rambling aside, i love your art, and your song reccs on IG too! thank you for always sharing your timkon/kon-el brainrot with us <3

Oh my god love this songs vibes it’s very “getting disillusioned with fame” vibes

Also I big agree! Kon in smallville just…the vibes are too good. I guess I’d prefer it if they changed his haircut at least. But It’s very fitting for 2000s I guess. I also like how some artists draw tshirt Kon tbh (Francis manapul, Marcus to), but I can’t get behind how the artist for tt03 draws him tbh…And design wise, i wished they at least let him keep some accessories…and then let him transition into a new style that’s somewhat punk but something new and different too? In my head, that era of Kon in the 2009-2011 comics should have led to someone who was more sure in himself. Not insecure and not falsely confident like when he was younger, but like healthily confident if that makes sense…

Like this was just a doodle for what my version of tshirt kon would be like

Also random, i could literally rant for hours about how superboy’s written in both the 90s and 2000s bc both have good and bad, i have traits I prefer in one vs the other etc etc, but while in the 2000s he gives more…”macho” or “serious” Vibes based on appearance—I feel like he’s still pretty snarky at times, and surprisingly emotional and soft still? Sorry that was a random ramble. Kon in smallville is just vibes if u get it u get it

Something that’s absolutely hilarious about Harry initially describing Regulus as less handsome than Sirius is that once he learns about the cave, Regulus becomes “the thin, dark Seeker who so resembled Sirius.” Regulus now looks like Sirius, when before he did not evidently. I really like the idea that the entire Black family looks super similar (RIP anyone looking a specific member because they have to play “Where’s Waldo: Black Family edition” and that’s nigh impossible to do because absolutely none of them will actually help someone find their family members. Bellatrix will be sitting at a table with Andromeda and Regulus, they have just seen Sirius three minutes ago, but they’ll tell Remus that they haven’t spoke to Sirius all week, good luck finding him), it’s just that Harry’s morality directly influences how attractive he finds them and thus how willing he is to admit that they look like Sirius.

sksksks imagining harry's scale of attraction being like 'how sirius are they on a scale of 0 to sirius.' thats it. thats his only criteria. the minute he starts finding someone attractive, its either because they look like s or they somehow morph to resemble him.

funniest part is the kid probably doesnt even realise it until someone like ron or hermione brings it up like 'err mate, dont u think ur swaying dangerously close to like. pseudo-incest here?'

(also hard agree on them looking v attractive like. i feel like they all have similar features? they make it their own in time, but for most people, theres a high degree of resemblance to the point that from afar, its v easy to get them mixed up. ofc the blacks dont make it any easier bc they have menace running thru their veins.)

(

gaster's like oh i'm a god i get to decide when you die and i simply have to wonder how much of this is him bluffing/boasting & how much is an actual departure in-lore from the mechanics of the tournament. does he Really decide on a whim when adam gets to die, is he Really the god? or is he aware of the Actual greater power over the tourney's events: the voting process? adam knows about it being a tournament, so a meta-fuckery guy like gaster would be able to, i think, be aware of it a little further. and him being at its whims like that does explain why adam survived at first & hamood was killed, straightforwardly in a somewhat unintriguing way. or are we actually here to take that the events of doatk's story are pretend self-contained, the tournament in-universe is just a facade, and everything is both more & less structured than it looks? the whole alternate universe viewings were already a bit of a look at that. but then weren't dubduo on the verge of figuring out the structure of winning matches vs being eliminated? if adam's losses are always rigged by gaster himself, why have him participate tournament-wise himself, assuming that there isn't a roommate in the first two matches or that adam doesn't escape gonering every time? if adam's weak compared to gaster & gaster is a god over the realm, what's gained from letting him stick around, the results mishap, all that? sure can't wait to see where this goes

See, the one Sadboy Loki stan-meta point I will generally agree on is that the desperate need for a throne is about wanting the acceptance and acclaim (ie The Poor Sad Woobie Just Wants To Be Loved) so yeah fair enough on the redemption arc being But What If Friends?? and What If Me But Hot Hot Selfcest Gaining Self-Respect?

I suppose the proof of that is that while pretending to be Odin and literally being the king of Asgard he... did fuck all, really? Wrote a play about himself, lounged around a bit. That's not someone who wants the power bit of being the ruler of everything and while I may disagree on the exact depths of his emo despair and whether it's a moral get-out-of-jail-free card I do agree that yeah the thing that makes ruling everyone attractive to Loki is that those everyones (erm...) will then pay attention to you and tell you how great you are.

That probably *is* the Younger Son thing at work, innit? "Well, if your brother were to die in a "hunting accident" of some freak accident or plague (btw he is basically immortal so this is v unlikely) then we'd need you after all, so we'll keep you around and make sure you're exactly the sort of arrogant twat we need for that job and probably stop you getting too interested in doing something else with your life *but* as mentioned you're basically the insurance policy that we're unlikely to ever actually need so... maybe you could take up knitting? Bee-keeping?" (This is, again, why monarchies and primogeniture are fucking *terrible* ideas that lead to societies overflowing with young men itching to become Crusaders and Conquistadors but I'm sure nobody needs me to go on about that shit again though I just thought of a thing I should add to that fic)

Hi Rae! I'm really excited for your upcoming fic because I don't think I've read any painting fic where Mike finds out and they don't immediately get together. I'm looking forward to seeing the slowburn play out in the rest of the series :)

oh my god thank you!! i really appreciate you sending this 🥺

yeah, i really enjoy the interpretation where mike already knows how he feels and i love reading painting fics where they immediately get together, but also i am a Huge sucker for slowburns and since i don't think i've ever seen a fic where mike finds out about the painting and they talk about it but don't get together right away, i wanted to try a different sort of characterization :)

also, one of the things that i value most about byler is mike and will's really strong friendship, because that's the core of who they are and why they fell for each other in the first place, so i really wanted to write something that gets their friendship back to a solid and secure place after the strain of s3-4 before they start a relationship. and (spoiler alert) the other fics in the series will take place a year after this one, so they'll have that time to grow closer and mike will have had a lot of time to properly heal from the breakup with el before he finally comes to terms with his feelings for will and confesses.

by the way, i would highly recommend this fic by @padmedala, especially parts 2 and 4, if you want a similar approach to this story! they don't actually talk about the painting in this fic, but it does feature mike finding out about it and them building their friendship back up before mike comes out :)

IT’S DONE. IT’S DONE DAMN IT. [DISTRESSED KAZOO] Shaking, crying, swearing about my feelings, etc, etc.

you are my ddaaadd, you’re my dad!! boogie woogie woogie woogie!!! don’t look at me i’m trying to cope

I’m sorry it’s 2am I’m SO emotionally compromised I love him I love this man why agent hurt so good (beloved, don’t change), anyway, appreciation post for the two (2) whole authority figures in his entire life Tyr ever marginally respected and extra props to them for pulling off ‘major respect’ status (okay, the bar was LOW maybe but. still. its not just bc of that that they cleared by such a margin) and also I’m taking massive persistent damage don’t TALK to me about IA/Watcher Two I’m FINE i’m tOTALLY FIne and. there’s something in my eyes. It’s fine it’s fine everything is fine.

also i didn’t catch it because i was too busy LAUGHING but i brought kaliyo this time and heR COMMENT AFTER HE TALKS TO ARDUN Klnfla;dsnflkasdnflk;sadnfl “if you two are done making out” kALIYO PLEASE I love these dumb bitches so much your honor, the IA crew is just a collective train wreck they’re all doing the action slide gun pose together that’s the collective team brain cell somewhere between james bond theme and pink panther

[inhales] anyway if you haven’t played imperial agent and you’re following me i am propaganda’ing you into experiencing my absolutely unbiasedly favorite swtor class [i’m biased. but it’s also really good.]

send tweet and all that jazz

things learned in episode 41:

the nouto and the donbrothers have been meeting up to duel, but have yet to declare a winner between momoi and sonoi

the nouto are considered regulars at donbura now

saruhara is rejected by sononi once more

sonoi is too embarrassed to ask for help regarding the nouto's understanding of santa

ideon is made from human brain waves, and as a thank you for their world, every year a group of nouto are chosen to act as santa claus to bring joy to humans- this year sonoi, sonoza, and sononi were chosen

momoi notes that there are santas all around- haruka tells him that these santas are people dressed up for promotional purposes/for work- this is new information to momoi

kaito and santa are old friends who once swore to be eternal heroes

santa describes kaito as being a "good egg"

santa has grown bitter over the ungratefulness that people have shown towards him- causing him to become a hitotsuki

sonoi asks santa to return to acting as santa claus and helps train the nouto, but he refuses

momoi tells sonoi that being santa requires a lot of endurance and a kind smile- the nouto train and practice their smiles

inu brother notes to don doragoku that it is standard that the other donbrothers go forward without them

inu brother can call murasame and use them to fight, but if murasame's power/need to fight overwhelms them, inu brother cannot control what they do

after fighting the donbrothers, murasame is confused about what they were doing but ultimately returns to inuzuka

the nouto successfully act as santa claus, bringing joy to children all over

when momoi was a child, santa came to him and asked him if he could donate some of his toys, so that santa had toys to deliver- momoi agreed and santa played card games with him

ever since he met santa momoi has been saving money so that if santa came to him again, he would have something to give- momoi presents santa with a bag of toys for him to deliver

santa ultimately decides to act as santa claus once more after speaking with momoi- momoi notes he likes the full santa claus look more than the casual look he had before

So many stupid small things to try and manage and handle and figure out and I'm tired and feeling worse mentally by the day and fuck just... fuck...

Hi Ashlie! Sorry if you've been asked this before (maybe if u could pls link up a past reply to this if u have before?? ;-;) but in ILY how do you think we'll return back to the scene with Nol & Shinae (w/ Shinae gripping Nol's wrist) ? (and perhaps u may have a brand new look on this after recent events in the chapters as of lately?)

In the beginning of this flashback arc I use to think we are running this arc as Shinae's retelling it to Nol (as if she's finally letting Nol (not yeongi) to get to really know her, as if they are meeting for the first time) but now i feel such memories are too intimate and personal to share all of sudden. I have a feeling we're gonna have this drama cliche where they get interrupted by someone (or something) like right after she tells him "Nobody is allowed to touch that", but I really hope that's not the case ! >< I want something new & refreshing if anything i want that scene between Nol & Shinae to last even longer because we've just been waiting for it for months ! (even years!!)

I've only briefly touched on it in other asks responses, so don't worry! I think my thoughts flipflop every time I'm asked, anyway, so I don't mind digging in to this!

Firstly, I think we are within 3 (fast pass) episodes of returning to the present, and that's a VERY generous estimate. After seeing the direction of FP 196, I feel very strongly that 197 MIGHT take us to Shinae's Fall, but I think it's more likely to be in 198 or 199? I hope I get the brain energy to make a quick post about what I THINK might go down, because I have some IDEAS. If it does happen next episode, I think it might feel a little too swift....? I think the timeline has to inch along JUST a smidge further, but I'll get to that in that "prediction" (lol) post. THAT SAID we are SO SO CLOSE!

I think I've said it before in here, or maybe on reddit, but I've always had the sense that yes, this is not a recollection from Shinae to Nol. Based on her reaction to him, I don't think she's inclined to tell him what happened - or rather, if she does, she's going to give him a vague summary of it. But more than that, I think this flashback arc serves multiple purposes, or else it wouldn't be so drawn out and rich in detail. Part of it is, yes, for our sake as viewers to finally have the full story and really understand Shinae's situation, to understand just how Alyssa caused so much hurt that she's carried around forever. Alyssa was not simply the straw that broke the camel's back like I had believed before. Shinae didn't shut down and put up a guard solely because she'd had enough of being stomped on by people. Alyssa like, broke Shinae and she is only just starting to recover from the ramifications of placing so much trust in someone who turned around and hurt her so much.

But I think by now we can also see that it was always a more nuanced story than we thought. I was actually looking at some webtoon comments earlier on some of the episodes up to 188 (which I rarely do) and even at that point a lot of people were... I'm going to say willfully ignorant lol to a lot of the nuanced complexity in the situation, and a lot of that is only being made richer in 196. What I'm getting at with this is: I think Shinae doesn't hold a lot of animosity because she realizes there was a lot more going on than she ever knew or understood - in fact, she actually addressed this during the Kim formal arc, when she noted that Alyssa is afraid she'll tell Nol what happened, and admits that she herself doesn't even fully know the truth. I'll get more into this in another post, but the basic gist is that there are clearly a lot of layers to their relationship, and things aren't always what they appear on the surface, and middle school Shinae certainly didn't know that and even at the formal, Shinae didn't yet know the truth.

I'm thinking, then, that this flashback is also for Shinae. She hides her scar and represses her memories of middle school, locking them away, and given the way her recollection of the fall appeared so hazy and distorted in episode 16 as well as the way Alyssa appeared in Shinae's mind as a result of "Think of everything that makes you mad" while beating up the bear suit and she paused - it's safe to say it's not something Shinae thinks about, and lol why would she? It's clearly a painful memory wrought with emotions. But moreover, think of this: prior to Alyssa, the people Shinae is angry at, the ones she thinks "you make me mad" towards - Nol, Kousuke, Yui - are all people who have actively and recently hurt her and done things to make her angry. But everyone else who follows - Alyssa, her mother, her dad, herself - are people who make her angry because she doesn't understand. She doesn't understand why Alyssa had a change of heart, she doesn't understand why her mother left and separated her from her sister and never stayed in touch, she doesn't understand why her father is failing at being a father and put them in such great risk out of pride and shame, and she doesn't understand why she keeps letting herself get hurt by people why she keeps letting them in only to deceive and hurt her. So I think maybe when Nol addressed her scar, when he asked if it was punishment and dared to address the very thing she actively hides and represses and refuses to acknowledge or think about, she was forced to deal with an onslaught of recollection that she's kept at bay. He broke a dam and now she's faced with the very thing she's avoided, and I think maybe it's to provide her with insight.

Much like with Nol, while neither of them handled things in a good way, Alyssa was dealing with more than Shinae saw the surface, had secrets she was too afraid to reveal, secrets she thought would scare away the only friend she had, so she acts in defense and it leaves Shinae confused. Without knowing what Alyssa is hiding, what she's guarding, how is Shinae to understand? How is she supposed to move on? In 196, I think it's implied that Shinae doesn't understand why Alyssa is being bullied - I think up until now she, like the rest of us, has thought Alyssa is being picked on for being nerdy, for hanging around with Shinae, for not "fitting in", and given the way that Shinae admitted to herself at the formal that she doesn't know the whole truth, I'm guessing that means she isn't fully picking up what they're putting down, she doesn't get what is Alyssa is being bullied over. Now that she's older, though, now that she's a little more removed from the situation, maybe these memories will offer a little enlightenment to what really went on.

The scar can only be a punishment if Shinae did something wrong. She didn't put her trust in a person who didn't care about her and turned on her the moment she could. She put her trust in a person who wasn't ready to reveal their secrets - just like she did with Nol. She piled on hope and trust and cared for someone who only "betrayed her" in that she didn't understand. Shinae wanted to be let in neither of them were willing to do that. But I think it's important that it's emphasizing Alyssa wasn't as malicious or mean-spirited as believed before.

Shinae was not punished for trusting the wrong people. They were just people not ready to share that part of them yet. And look, isn't that the same with her? Only just now is she revealing to Nol why she was this way, what made her so guarded, and still it's so vague and only in response to their similar experiences.

I know this a lot of preamble lol but this is my new insight on this arc that this may be a moment of revelation for Shinae, who has refused to acknowledge the past and locked it all away as she built up walls around her. But Nol has, yet again, managed to knock down those walls and she's bared a little more vulnerable, having confessed that she, too, has been dogged by misfortune, her scar now seen by him. I DO think, in a way, it is Nol and Shinae meeting each other for the first time, though. Nol is not hiding his true self from him and she is revealing little truths she hasn't even admitted to herself until this moment, and I've said it before, but I think it's putting them on a really level ground with each other. Shinae has now seen a glimpse into the secrets and Nol carries, has learned who he is when he isn't wearing his Yeonggi mask, and I think...? it's a moment of shared honesty? Nol has to have known that Shinae would feel antagonized by him calling out the scar - he knows he's never seen it before, that it means she must carefully keep it hidden, that she's always been cagey and guarded and this would be no different - so does he address it in hopes that she will bare some of her secrets to him, as he's unwittingly done with her?

What I'm hoping - especially if this is a moment of insight for Shinae - is when we return to the present, maybe we'll see her with mixed emotions on her face, as realization dawns on her? Maybe a moment of vague honesty - that she realizes this scar wasn't really a punishment after all, or that sometimes situations are more complex than they realize at the time? Something to allude that though this scar is a private, formative foundation of who she is, that it's just another series of unfortunate events in her life? Maybe we'll even come back to the present and she'll tell him a vague recollection of what happened - about a time someone she trusted and cared about accidentally hurt her, and how it damaged her in a way she couldn't begin to undo until he broke her shell? God, I would LOVE that, actually - I don't need her to say WHO hurt her, I just want her to admit that it was an event that altered the entire trajectory of her life, and that it was Nol's friendship that helped to undo the damage it caused, so that he can understand his importance in her life. Suddenly, it is not enough for me for her to tell him he's important to her, I want him to understand why he was something worth chasing down in the rain as she anguished and pleaded with him, and so he understands what it means for her to take him back.

I know the fear of an interruption is high, and I do go back and forth on whether or not I think it will happen. It IS highly cliche and frankly.... it's a cheap tactic lol. An interruption is meant to prolong a conflict, to ensure there is no closure reached, to carry on some kind of tension, but the tension has, thus far, been diffused by this flashback. Wouldn't an interruption be overkill? There was so much build up to this moment - from the moment Nol pleaded guilty and became unreachable, every time he slipped right through everyone's fingers, every time he did something to add fuel to the fire, the curveball (if you will lol) of Shinae's moment with her dad, it was all rising action leading to the climatic confession of "I really like her! She's special to me". They are in the process of re-establishing their relationship, re-establishing their boundaries. It is Nol's grand return to the people from who he ran away, and for their tension to be broken by anything but their own choices, before they've resolved anything, would be CRUEL and, frankly speaking, shitty storytelling. Nol said it himself - this is his last night before he leaves, and I think when he made that decision to climb up onto the roof with Shinae, it was yes, to get some closure and maybe to reassure himself of his standing? Does he have friends to return to when his sentence is up? Does he deserve to return to them when his sentence is up?

So yes, I agree - and ardently hope! - that they won't be interrupted. I think we'll return to the present and maybe the tension will be diffused, or at least it will be shortly thereafter, and I REALLY hope that Nol will join the party. When Shinae said she doesn't need him here, he said he needs him here, so I hope he plans to go see Soushi and Dieter and make up with them, too, and to maybe allow himself one night (or, really a couple hours at this point lol) to really truly enjoy something - not for absolution, not with the fear that he will be punished for having fun, but to make an active choice to enjoy the moment while he has the chance. God I want that SO BADLY. I also think that returning to the present, if Shinae reveals even a vague truth to Nol and they release their weird hold lol it would be, hmmm, I guess acceptance? Nol knowing Shinae is done running, Shinae deciding it's okay to put her trust in him again?

I mean, a really cheesy thing I'd like to see but I don't know if we'll get is some kind of, idk, plans...? For visitation or something? I think Nol wouldn't want anyone to visit him but wouldn't it be nice if they did, anyway? Ground him to who he is, tether him so that he doesn't lose himself while locked up - and always serve a reminder that there are people waiting for him on the other side, people who support and cherish him. UGGGHHH feelings! lol

I do want to see a little more of this new dynamic for Nol and Shinae - this kind of honesty and equal footing, this new evolution of their relationship where neither of them has the upper hand, neither of them have ulterior motives, neither of them running and chasing each other but finally facing each other as formidable allies. It's SO satisfying to see, even if they are both on edge at this moment. I want to see that soften, if only a little, as they accept each other again. I know we probably won't have a lot of episodes left before the morning comes to take Nol away, but I hope we get to see him at the party and feel real enjoyment for once.

Oops, late add on but, now that I'm thinking about it.... I do think there is a possibility that after they've resolved things themselves - relinquished their hold on each other, lowered their defenses, I think there's a chance Minhyuk could show up? ONLY because we all know Nol and Minhyuk meeting will likely NOT go well, and if Nol goes and joins the party, it feels like.... hmmm it doesn't feel, narratively, like that would flow as well. There's too many people around. But if Minhyuk comes looking for Shinae and finds Nol there, he might get his opportunity to go hulking oppressive brother lol and say a few choice words - but more importantly, Shinae would have the opportunity to tell Minhyuk that it's okay, that things are fine now or something. (I still see Minhyuk giving him the "I have my eye on you buddy" stink-eye, though lol) And I'm fine with that! As long as it's not an interruption that is further delaying their resolution, I'm fine with anyone coming to the rooftop (especially if it involves Nol saying "I'll be joining" or something lol) but especially in this case!

Hi! Hope you're well. I have a random question about cough syrup, (it's still awesome btw!) and I wanna preface this by saying that I absolutely get if you don't want to answer this. But basically, is the fic planned to get *very* dark? Should I emotionally prepare? It's starting to feel very foreboding and I'm getting a smidge worried.

- Fyodor

hey fyodor, hope you're having a good day/night!

so this is a hard question for me to answer-- one because i want to be cognizant of where the line crosses from general statements to spoiler material, and also because my own perception of dark content is a little skewed.

as a broad statement, what i will say is that as the story builds up to a climactic point, a lot of the elements we already saw in each character's storyline is going to intensify as well (elements being central conflicts, recurring emotions, etc.)

however, what I will note is that for one of the two main POVs (Ranboo's story or Tubbo's story, I wont specify), there is going to be an introduction of new elements that haven't been seen that much or at all in their past chapters-- for example, a new conflict or experience or realization as a central part of their story going forward

(ofc both are going to have new plot reveals and plot points but by here I mean instead of expanding on something mentioned briefly in the past for their chapters, it would instead bring up something entirely unheard of in the context of CS so far beyond just basic foreshadowing)

This new introduction of an element makes their own story a lot darker i think

CS is angst with a happy ending and has a significant amount of its energy dedicated to exploring the recovery of the characters. however some of the more near upcoming chapters are these heavy ones, and I'm going to do my best to make sure I provide chapter summaries, trigger free versions, ETC as easily accessible as possible for people to be able to get the gist down without having to read through all the details if that's what feels best

TLDR: Yes, for one of the POVs moreso than the other, but im going to make sure people have alternate ways of getting the story content at the darker parts + it has a happy ending overall.