#thank you if you read this im going insane | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stevie-petey · 3 days

Note

hear me out, imagine if steve wasn't that much of a loser with girls. A blur where a girl kinda flirts with him at his job and bug would be like "i don't care...👀"

OH DELICIOUS REQUEST ANON

enjoy <3

"i gotta say, i love a man in uniform."

you drop the comic youd been reading onto the booth youre sitting at and watch the girl standing in front of steve, doing a horrible job of flirting with him. shes blonde, small and dainty looking, and you quirk your head as you watch her grab for steves arm.

steve, meanwhile, stares at her with wide and terrified eyes. "oh, uh. thanks, i guess? but what are you doing?"

"admiring the man in uniform," the girl giggles, now encasing her hand around steves upper bicep. she lets out a dramatic and far too fake gasp and giggles once more. "and hes a strong man at that."

"i mean, ive been working out." steve responds, his voice squeaky and uncertain as his heart drops. he knows hes said the wrong thing.

you narrow your eyes at his response.

the blonde girl leans across the counter, making sure to lean her chest close to steves face, and the poor boy is doing everything he can to keep his eyes focused on her face.

he can practically feel your eyes burning into the back of the girls head. he knows youre watching them and that he has maybe five seconds before you set fire to his car. steve clears his throat and tries to escape. "hey, uh. robin?"

his coworker opens the sliding windows and almost chokes on her spit when she sees the blonde girls boobs so close to steves face. "oh my god."

"yeah," he clears his throat again and motions over to the blonde. "robin, would you mind assisting this, uh. lovely customer while i go make sure the girl of my dreams doesnt murder me?"

"im not the girl of your dreams?" the blonde girl suddenly pulls away from steve with a sneer on her face.

"far from it, dude." robin snorts at her, now joining steve at the cash register. she takes a peek at where youre sitting and notices that youve been watching them the entire time, your expression stony and unamused. with a wince, robin pats steves back. "good luck, man."

"im so dead," steve drops his head in shame as he starts to walk over to you. he sees the annoyance on your face and you watch him approach with your arms crossed. he feels like hes walking towards a death sentence. when steve sits down at your booth, you lean back against your seat and stare at him. "have i ever told you how beautiful you are?"

"no."

"well, i should!" steves voice is higher than usual and he feels like hes about to die.

seeing that hes sufficiently terrified, you roll your sleeves up and bring steves hand to your upper arm, where your scar from almost two years ago resides. "feel that?"

steve stutters over his words. "you-uh. your scar? or, shit. no, your skin is so smooth? like, insanely smooth. smoothest skin ive ever had the honor of feeling-"

"no, silly," you look up at steve and bat your eyes at him. when his breath hitches and he risks a look at your lips, you smile. "i mean, ive been working out. cant you tell?"

steve practically tears himself away from you and you cant help but laugh at his misery. "you heard that?"

"oh yeah. real smooth, by the way." you roll your sleeves back down. "like my skin, apparently."

"im sorry, angel. she was scaring me and my brain short circuited." steve drops his head onto your shoulder, mourning his stupidity.

you bring a hand up to his hair and begin to play with it as you console him. you know he hadnt meant any harm, that he truly had responded to the blonde girl out of genuine stupidity and fear, which is only further proven by the way he melts against your body and wraps an arm around you. steve isnt even your boyfriend and yet here he is, soaking up your forgiveness as if his life depends on it.

the blonde girl looks over at the two of you and gives you a dirty look, which you smile at. you raise a hand and wave at her, smug, and she rolls her eyes and stomps away.

robin, meanwhile, gives you a thumbs up and shouts from across the room, "crisis averted, then?"

"i didnt die!" steve shouts back, face still buried in your neck.

"not yet, at least."

steve sighs. "yeah, tomorrow i'll probably say something worse."

"oh, you definitely will, honey."

#ask #anon #m speaks #come home blurb #m's writing #set in between seasons 2 and 3 !#steve: im just a boy

78 notes · View notes

anothermansjeans · 2 days

Note

Request!

Spencer comforting YouTuber!reader when she gets an inevitable troll- maybe on a live stream at first - coming to her defense immediately by reading a comment she doesn’t even see and then once the camera is off, making sure she knows the troll was an idiot.

this isn't followed exactly (i'm so sorry), but i think this is a cute one??

cw: someone being a hater, spencer's a feminist!!

wc: 391

youtuber!reader masterlist

“What was the last show I watched? Oh! Spencer and I just started watching The Bear!”

“Who are you talking to?” Spencer walked into the living room, coming up from behind the couch to see you on a livestream.

“Just doing a live… wanna join?”

He gave you a nod before sitting down, eyes scanning the comments. You continued to answer the ones you could catch a glimpse of, but as soon as Spencer came into frame, the comments were going at an insane speed.

“That is completely not true.”

His sudden comment made your head turn towards him with furrowed eyebrows, “what, babe?”

“Someone commented that the only reason you're ‘popping off’ right now is because of me… they said this is why men are superior, which is such a stuck mindset.”

“Spence, it’s okay–”

“But it's not.” His eyes fired up and he turned towards you, grabbing your hand and rubbing his thumb in soothing circles. “You were doing extremely well before we even met. When we started dating you had a significant amount of loyal followers. Their opinion on men being superior is also a disgusting comment. Women have to work twice as hard as a man to get to where they are due to patriarchal norms, so if anything, their resilience is respectable and makes them superior.”

You stared at him for a minute, not really knowing what to say.

“Are you okay?”

His concern brought you back down to Earth, and you leaned forward to press your lips together, not caring about the livestream. When you separated, you ran your fingers through his hair, giving him a smile. “I love you. Thank you for that; I’ve never had someone stick up for me like that before.”

“I didn't want you to be hurt…”

Pouting at his words, your hands fell to grasp his and give them a squeeze. “I don't think I could ever get hurt when you're around.” And you were telling the truth. As long as Spencer was in your life, you would be happy and feel nothing but protected.

BONUS: some comments

@ user: HOLY SHIT HE WENT OFF?

@ user1: wait i want one… where can i buy him?

@ user2: STOP THE KISS OMG

@ user3: PLEASE ADOPT ME IM BEGGING

@ user4: fuck that troll. spencer was so right

@ user5: he IS the feminist movement

youtuber!reader taglist: @im-a-ghost666 @lyd14k4y @happiestcat @hauntedtv13 @obi-wansgirl @charismatic-writer @navs-bhat @itsleilabxtch @strabarrybat @hiireadstuff @cherrybb-ily @wietske27 @mynameiskelly @mcntsee @aremuslupinsimp @universallyblizzardlove

let me know if you would like to be added or removed!!

#dr spencer reid #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x fem!reader #dr spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #youtuber!reader

123 notes · View notes

abouttofillhisshoes · 3 days

Note

📚 would love to hear some of ur recs !!!!

oh my god wait wait i came prepared

Touch tank by @sugar-coat-it is my fucking go-to oh my god the amount of times ive reread this is concerning. such good prose and the build up and DIALOGUE (im such a slut for good dialogue) makes me want to rip my skin off /pos

Mine by @wreckedandpolemic is so. insanely good i'm not one for dom matty but this. this is where its at mate. The way you write him is so delicious and satisfying to read i cant even begin to put into words.

YNA // YFL by @drinkurkombucha oh my GOD stop stop fucking i cant do this. The emotional rollercoaster that was this fic still haunts my dreams AND writing. I've taken so much inspiration from them and their writing style, and a lot of MPIND comes from the absolute mess i was after i read this.

The Cellophane House // Lost boys by @vinylandcoffeecollection i need to DIE its not even funny. The amount of tears i shed over this two parter warrants me being compensated for like. emotional damages the angst is so angst here its written like a true novel. Such a icon their other work is also insanely good, please go read it i beg

@haveyouseenherlately her entire blurb masterlist needs to be bound into a fucking book im so serious. So talented i cant even begin to describe it.

@awellposhmagazine YOU LEGENDDD oh my god jaye she is sooo ughhhh i love her writing style so much especially in this blurb holy shit i actually had to take a nature walk after reading that

@toomuchracket her entire masterlist needs to be studied and analyzed oh my fucking christ. Office matty has such a special place in my heart please never kill him off, you're one of the greatest writers i've ever had the pleasure of reading.

@noacfslut we all know and love elle for her Mechanic Matty AU but dyou know what my absolute favourite is? Sleazy Janitor Matty SEDATE ME NOW OH MY GOD????? He's so. i cant do this elle you're amazing and your writing style is so vivid and your DIALOGUE let me die rq.

@abiiors just read the entire masterlist and let me yell at you about it then please xx. my personal fav is corruption do not SPEAK TO ME ABOUT IT holy shit a nature walk was definitely needed afterwards.

i cant even begin to name every single extraordinary writer i know, but everyone and anyone who puts out fics deserves to be on this list. You're all legendary and some of these fics, especially CH/YFL have truly affected me on a deeper, emotional level.

To all fic writers, thank you.

#why am i so emo at the end #but holy shit 75blr is filled with pure talent i cant even begin to list every single amazing writer here #lena speaks #matty healy #matty healy fanfiction #the 1975 #george daniel #ross macdonald #adam hann #the 1975 fanfiction #fic recs #tags are so out of order wow okay

37 notes · View notes

bloomingdarkgarden · 9 hours

Text

My unabridged and uninvited Bridgerton season 3 thoughts live as i binge-watched until midnight last night:

fuck this show is euphoric escapism soap opera and idk what whimsical crack they put in it but it always manages to make my heartrate go insane. My expectations were low, maybe because ive been starved for any tiny crumb of this whimsy idk but i feel atrociously fed so here we go:

colin u are acting like an instagram influencer and we all see thru u bye.

Nicola is the most stunning person on television 50 shades of aqua move over boys I'm first in line for her dance card.

I would sell my soul to satan to have a cigarette with Lady Danbury in her afterhours tea room.

ngl the resurgence of the season 1 orchestrals is BEAUTIFUL and hitting harder than the new covers.

cressida's hair needs a dedicated gallery space and im completely here for her humanization she is a ruthless sad hoe and i understand. creloise good morning.

pen and francesca bonding over being introverts>>>>

pen is the people's princess for real, bookish as hell and socially awkward until she has 3 glasses of wine and then she's real as fuck. mood.

OH MY GOD THE KISS THE NIGHT GARDEN THE SHEER STARVATION his hand on her cheek and he's looking at her like he just touched god fucking hell i had to rewind and watch three times.

Pen trying to impress Debling "I LOVE BIRDS' no she did not I spit out my wine. yes penelope yes. don't let anyone tell u you don't have game honey.

omg balloon drama lol what is this shit peak bridgerton nonsense.

benedict has the personality of a rug on someone's back patio, polite and unnecessary. the reason why his scenes are so offputting every season is because he has been depicted as Goofy from A Goofy Movie no i have not read the books but boy they are gonna have to pay me money to digest him as a love interest i swear to god.

ugh penelope is the most relatable female lead in this entire series i am rooting for her SO hard.

thank fuck lady featherington is willing to discuss penetration with her daughters they now stand a fraction of a chance of surviving the world. lady f for president.

i found francesca's placidity / passitivity about the next 50 years of her life v frustrating at first but she grew on me immensely and am looking forward to more of her screentime.

debling has kind eyes and i will be sad if he's truly jilted... bravo netflix for once again making me care about the beta characters.

this danbury man flirting with lady bridgerton hello sire you are gallant as hell, wake up lady b.

colin's entire world being ruined for penelope is actual nirvana.

THE CARRIAGE SCENE THE CARRIAGE SCENE I WILL NEVER STOP LOVING THEM I WILL NEVER STOP I LOVE THEM IM INSANE ILL NEVER STOP holy shit. colin asking if the carriage can just keep going and pen laughing because that's a gd ridiculous thing to say is peak friends to lovers i felt their friendship in that moment and im aching with it ugh they are besties with hormones GOD i will never. stop. loving. them idc idc idc.

can't wait to watch 75 more times goodnight.

#bridgerton #bridgerton season 3 #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton #unabridged ramble #polin

35 notes · View notes

sugdenlovesdingle · 2 days

Text

Seven sentence Sunday

thanks for the tags @welcometololaland @bonheur-cafe @sznofthesticks

I started reading Rachel's Carlos & Nancy bffs fic last night (I *WILL* leave a comment when I finish it, I promise, I just got too tired last night to keep reading) and I just love their friendship and it kind of inspired this. It's not really much of anything yet (i wrote it on my phone while out walking my dog) but hopefully i can work it in my nancy/marjan fic somehow.

---

"Nancy?" Carlos opened the door for her further to let her in. "Is everything alright?"

"TK isn't home is he?" she asked, looking around.

"No... he's at a meeting with his sponsor... But I can call him for you if you want."

"No. I want to talk to you, I need to talk to you and TK can't know."

Carlos frowned.

:"Why? It's a bit early to start planning his birthday. You know it's not until December."

"Marjan and I are together. As a couple. We're dating." Nancy blurted out. "And I need to tell someone or else I'm going insane."

"Uh... well... uh... congratulations? I guess?"

"Sorry for dumping all of this on you but normally I'd talk to TK since we're stuck in the bus together all day anyway, but Marj doesn't want him to know yet, but she can talk to Paul. So Judd and cap are the only ones left, but I can't talk to them or captain Strand because Mateo lives with him and he's already moved to B shift because of me and -"

"Hey, take a breath." Carlos grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze. "You're always welcome. We're friends, you can always talk to me. I just... wasn't expecting this... any of it to be honest."

"Yeah... it's uhm... new..."

"Yeah? Good new?"

Nancy smiled.

"Oh yeah. So good. I feel like I'm on cloud nine whenever she's just in the same room and when she smiles... when she smiles at me... the rest of the world just fades away."

Carlos smiled, he knew the feeling all too well.

"Come on, sit down. TK won't be back for a while, he and Cooper usually grab something to eat after their meetings." He sat down on the sofa and waited for Nancy to join him. "Tell me everything."

---

open tag + tagging

@carlos-in-glasses @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad @your-catfish-friend @chicgeekgirl89 @lemonlyman-dotcom

@oldfangirl81 @nancygillianmvp @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @sanjuwrites

#911 lone star #seven sentence sunday #tarlos #carlos reyes #nancy gillian #nancy & carlos #nancy/marjan

26 notes · View notes

beesmygod · 3 days

Text

hey i just want to say: despite the fact that i try not to take any joy from seeing numbers go up, i really appreciate all of you guys who hit the like button on patreon and comment on various places. i read them all and try to like them all and it makes it all feel less like im throwing everything into a bottomless hole. i was worried about opening comments years ago bc i know unfettered streams of praise have the potential to make you into an insane person. but its been a hoot. thank you. i just uploaded a page lol.

37 notes · View notes

mummer · 11 months

Note

just saw asteroid city last night, pls explain the proposed significance of the kiss!!

answering this publicly hope thats ok! cant do a readmore im on mobile *****asteroid city spoilers below beware*****

i dont remember anyones names so this is gonna sound partly unhinged. okay so the edward norton playwright and jason schwartzman actor (not character, in the black and white parts) are lovers right. tbh i thought this was kind of a gag and forgot about it. but later we find out that the playwright died 6 months into the production. i didnt make the connection that THAT’s why the actor-jason has to suddenly leave the stage and freaks out backstage about how he’s not sure he’s Doing it right. hes not talking about acting!! because he himself is literally grieving his lover while he’s playing a character who’s grieving his wife written by his lover so obviously it’s too much!!! actor-jason is trying to find meaning in his death through his writing but there isnt any meaning in death [gerris drinkwater voice] which is what the play is trying to say anyway. he doesnt think he’s performing grief right even in his own life!!! (and tbh it’s the 50s so he wouldnt be able to perform grief publicly anyway!!!!) the play starts with a car accident… anyone would search for some hidden meaning there, some sign…. so when he talks to margot robbie outside it’s not really about finding the CHARACTER’s motivations it’s about the actor himself being able to process the playwright’s death! and adrien brody director was probably also dealing with that too (him and norton seemed to be good buddies) so the whole “sleeping backstage” thing gets a bit sadder maybe? maybe everyone else got this in the theatre and im just stupid lol but crazy making stuff to me!!! the whole story is about sublimated gay grief that cannot be expressed?!?!

the tweet that caught me onto this was here which posits that the playwright’s death was a suicide but i think that’s pretty stupid and unnecessary because the whole thing about the play asteroid city is that death is random and meaningless. im pretty sure that’s what the alien represents— a shocking and absurd event that isnt outright evil or menacing, not something anyone can predict or make sense of, it’s just a thing that happens to you out of nowhere, it doesnt mean anything. he’s a little black figure, he’s death! giving and taking! aagh

#you’re the wife who played my actor :(#posthumus #asteroid city #imagine youre in love with a playwright and he writes a play before he even meets you about how you cant get over his death which hasnt #happened yet. id go insane too #im going to see it again to see how this informs the whole thing because its driving me crazy #rewatching the performances knowing that they're performing people performing. augh.#remember when bryan cranston accidentally appears in frame. rending my garments #also ‘you cant wake up until you fall asleep’ confused me a bit but then i remembered that the margot robbie scene was supposed to be put o #as a dream sequence and it makes sense now. thanks #aliens are the new fairytale monster symbol of death. the ultimate Unknowable #EDIT okay i read the wikipedia summary got some facts wrong adrien brody is sleeping in the theatre during rehearsals so its not because of #the playwright’s death he’s just like that.

2K notes · View notes

drawnfamiliarfaces · 2 months

Text

i... wrote a smol fic (っ´▽`*)っ

also!!!!! If you haven't seen it - shoutout to first ever published fic in Ninja Showdown/My Immortal Soul tags - Lustrous Red by @missadmyre !!!

#ninja showdown #my immortal soul #first ninja x chase young #rc9gn first ninja #first ninja #rc9gn #chase young #xiaolin showdown #randy cunningham 9th grade ninja #rc9gn plop plop #well i say smol fic.... but those 4k words felt very long.#i did say i was going to direct my energy into writing >.> and now look at me ive gone insane #no actually dont look at me im just gonna go cry over my 20k words of rough drafts for like dozen ideas that are now going #to haunt my every waking moment like JESUS i woke up today and literally wrote out 1k words of an idea for a modern au for those two TToTT #its literally an au where its a meet cute turned meet violent and first is randy's sorta dad and chase wants to adopt omi #not to mention a different AU where its an epic mystery adventure AAAAAAA someone heeeelppppp meeeee #also. its been a month but im still staring so intently at missadmyre's fic hoping for another crumb. like thank you sm for the food!!!!#ive literally been rereading it several times after i went insane about it on my main blog and im still slurping at it like a starved perso #Ive been collecting my ideas like a dragon but after reading that fic i was like: I WANT TO READ MORE FICS ABOUT THEM #but i dont wanna be a whiny baby&beg others and be annoying about it. So i put on my big person pants and was like f it WE R WRITINg NOW #so i dont care how bad my writing will be. we gonna be balling on those ideas and YES it doesnt make sense im just v rambly rn

251 notes · View notes

iridescentmirrorsgenshin · 2 months

Text

An analysis of Alhaitham's egoism in relation to Kaveh

(Update: The essay this is taken from is now uploaded! It can be accessed here and here as as a pdf <3)

Max Stirner's anarchist egoism is speculated to be the basis of Alhaitham's personal egoism, therefore I will be drawing upon Stirner's 'The Unique and Its Property' for this analysis.

Property and power are key principles within this philosophy. The egoist recognises himself as an individual, separate from the general collective of “humanity”, in which concepts such as freedom and property are governed to and over the people, for then the individual is not considered as such, rather they are a part of “humanity”, rather than a whole individual (Stirner, 170). This thinking is demonstrated within Alhaitham’s Story Quest, where he dismantles Siraj’s Hivemind by targeting individuals that compromised the Hive and reminding them of their own beliefs and preferences – the individual in themselves is a whole, and is not a “part” of a system (Stirner, 170).

In this, the egoist governs himself by what he owns and what he wants to own: “ownness is my whole essence and existence, it is myself. I am free from what I am rid of, owner of what I have in my power, what I control. I am at all times and under every circumstance my own”(Stirner, 106). This relates to the concept of freedom, which, for an egoist exists according to having the power to be free of something, for example, being freed of hunger, thirst, or societal expectations (Stirner, 105). This is reflected within Alhaitham’s description: “He lives free – free from the searching eyes of ordinary people,” but also extends to the power to own.

As power is considered something which the egoist owns, property then becomes something which the egoist exerts power over, and in this, can property be made use of by the egoist – all the while, the property remains an independent vessel (Stirner, 162). This is seen within Alhaitham’s view on his vision, in that it is “no more than a useful tool”, as it can be used to serve his own needs, and that since it in his possession, he has obtained it with his own power, it makes no difference to check on it as he continues to retain that power.

In this sense then, Alhaitham has constructed his life around this form of egoism, in that anything he wants, he has, such as his job as the Scribe, his house, the interests he pursues, the people he enjoys. In order to maintain this way of life, he will deal with, or be rid of, anything he deems as "harmful".

With this, the egoist seeks satisfaction in themselves through the satisfaction of another. Ownership, in relation to another person, can become love, which like all things the egoist has power over, is ultimately theirs – as in their love for a person (Stirner, 187), which is given willingly by the egoist, for loving a person is done for the satisfaction that love brings: “But I love them with the awareness of egoism; I love them because love makes me happy, I love because love is natural to me, it pleases me,” (186).

In loving another comes sacrifice, which the egoist can give into without compromising himself, as he himself sets the “purchase price of [his love]” (187) according to the happiness attributed to the loved one, as in return, the egoist shall also receive happiness (186). To enjoy someone, in an egoist fashion, is to be able to sacrifice all possessions and ownerships without foregoing the sense of an individual, of “ownness”, as the egoist would then lose his objectivity:

“I can deny myself countless things to heighten his pleasure, and I can risk for him what would be dearest to me without him, my life, my welfare, my freedom. Indeed, it forms my pleasure and happiness to feast on his pleasure and happiness. But me, myself I do not sacrifice to him, but rather remain an egoist and—enjoy him. If I sacrifice to him everything I would keep without my love for him, that is very easy… But if I sacrifice others to one passion, I still do not… sacrifice my particular worth, my ownness. Where this nasty incident occurs, love looks no better than any other passion that I blindly obey.” – The Unique and Its Property, 185

It is relevant to note that just as the egoist receives happiness from a loved one’s pleasure, so does an egoist suffer from a loved one’s despair. Just as the egoist would sacrifice something of their own to provide happiness for a loved one in order to exact their own happiness, so too would an egoist sacrifice something, or act, to eradicate the root problem of a loved one’s misery, as this, in turn, would then resolve their own misery:

“If I see the beloved suffering, I suffer with him, and I find no rest until I’ve tried everything to comfort and cheer him…. It doesn’t follow from this that the same thing causes suffering… his tooth gives him pain, but his pain gives me pain. But because I cannot bear the sorrowful crease on the beloved forehead, therefore, then for my sake, I kiss it away. If I didn’t love this person, he could go right on creasing his forehead, that wouldn’t trouble me; I’m only driving away my troubles. – The Unique and Its Property, 186

The phrasing of “driving away… troubles” is particular to note here, due to similar usages of language used within Alhaitham’s Character Stories, in relation to him acting in accordance with his self-governed rules and serving his own self-interest by: “[acting] on his own will and deals with anything that appears harmful in his eyes”.

Kaveh, however, interprets Alhaitham’s egoism as a detached, pragmatic view of humanity, in which the individual isolates themselves not only as a means of prioritisation, but by elevating oneself over others by refusal to intermingle and to cooperate for the benefit of others. Not only is this a harmful opposition to Kaveh’s view of individuals sharing their knowledge and talent in order to pursue a better society, but due to Kaveh’s experience of Alhaitham’s personal egoism, it is harmful to Kaveh personally. Kaveh refuses to prioritise himself over others because he has seen a negative consequence of egoism, in which he has been “cut to the quick” and it has ended one of the few stable relationships in his life.

By Kaveh seeing Alhaitham’s comment about his altruism as malicious, Alhaitham has elevated himself over Kaveh, since Alhaitham does not have the same struggles as him, and has trivialised Kaveh’s trauma. To Kaveh, Alhaitham’s prioritisation of the self actively harms others as it desensitises the self to the emotions of others. Therefore, Kaveh opposes the egoism which Alhaitham advocates for, since he interprets it through his own lived experience. Hence, by Alhaitham asserting egoism over Kaveh as a means of Kaveh prioritising himself, it only reinforces Kaveh to strive to consider the feelings of others, as well as to not prioritise his own way of thinking if it undermines someone else’s.

In actuality, Alhaitham’s frustrations with Kaveh lie in his belief that Kaveh’s talents are incongruous with his values, and that if Kaveh were to prioritise himself, he would save himself suffering and enable himself to discover his “true self”, unrestricted by others placing labels onto him.

This is a personal frustration which Alhaitham would not compromise himself to assert onto a person he was indifferent to, due to his belief of not getting involved with other’s fates. However, he has been observed to ‘subvert’ his own rules to accommodate Kaveh. Through egoism, it can be seen that rather than ‘subverting’ these rules, Alhaitham adheres to them as an egoist, since he sees Kaveh as his mirror, they offer each other a contrasting perspective he believes they need to have a complete, objective vision of the world.

This is necessary for Alhaitham to consider within his own life, and therefore has extended his house to Kaveh, in order to expand his scope of thinking, and to consider perspectives he otherwise would not entertain. Kaveh’s ideals, his beliefs, and his philosophies explicitly interest Alhaitham, in contradiction with Kaveh believing that Alhaitham is disdainful of his perspectives.

In this way, Alhaitham enjoys Kaveh. He willingly pays for some of Kaveh’s tabs; pays for crates of wine for the two of them; and goes out of his way to pursue interactions with Kaveh. Just as Alhaitham is to Kaveh, Kaveh is an old friend, as unchanged in his beliefs as he was in the past and thus is a constant: “the most unshakable part of one's past is a friend that will never change”’.

Alhaitham strives to act in accordance to his own egoism and therefore assesses what “appears harmful” to him, in relation to these rules, so as to be rid of them. This can be extended to Kaveh, as Kaveh falls under what ‘belongs’ to Alhaitham, in the sense that ownership equates to Alhaitham’s enjoyment.

Alhaitham wants to have Kaveh in his life due to the alternate perspective which Kaveh offers him, thus expanding his horizons and granting him knowledge he otherwise would not obtain. As well as this, Kaveh is seen to be considered part of Alhaitham’s way of life that he wants to protect. In line with Stirner’s egoism, it follows that as Alhaitham enjoys Kaveh, as in, ‘owns’ the contentment Kaveh elicits, he therefore is affected by Kaveh’s self-inflicted grievances. Therefore, Alhaitham sees Kaveh’s altruism at the expense of his own wellbeing as something “harmful” to be dealt with, as this not only causes Kaveh inward misery, but also detriments Kaveh finding his “true self” (Alhaitham Character Story 3), which the egoist pursues above all else.

#i realised i hadn't actually discussed their philosophies in a post so here's an snippet from The Essay #kaveh's altruism is brushed over here but i didn't want this post getting too expansive oops #since their differences are the basis of the essay it's hard to filter that down into one post?#basically i'm aware that this reads as incomplete but i promise there is more where this came from!!!#also im reading that line: the two cannot reach a consensus even to this day #and im going insane because isn't that the resolution of their conflict? to find middle ground?#gee i wonder if that line is thematically crucial to their characters #also kaveh reads page 185 of the unique and its property and fights off a blush before denying everything #can they talk. please. im sick of them #the essay is coming along btw!!! thank you for all your thoughts and encouragement!!#haikaveh #alhaitham #kaveh #kavetham #haikaveh meta #genshin meta

128 notes · View notes

frenchublog · 3 months

Text

can anyone recommend fluffy (long) spuffy fanfics ? i need softness, yearning, longing in spuffy style

if you have a favourite story it's okay too hehe (ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ.ﾟ

#spuffy #personal #to be deleted later #i don't normally do that #but im in crisis and i need help #ive been reading geliot99's fanfics and now i fear i will go insane #no matter the season #s5 or s6 rewrites are my favs #bonus points if buffy and dawn actually sit in front of a therapist but even then i guess a demon would barge in and ruin the session #my girls can't catch a break #big huge bonus points if we get big brother/parental figure spike with dawn #he loves and protect his summers girls and that's the energy i love #*✲ﾟ*(❁´▽`❁)*✲ﾟ* thank you in advance to anyone that replies

125 notes · View notes

synthshenanigans · 4 months

Text

I'm curious as to peoples idea for what he'd do for the next power hour so

[These all being popular ideas or ppl he's mentioned]

This was all just a ploy to get you to read my info dump theory on the concept of a Chonny Jash Power Hour loser HAHAHA

Im joking tho. Not about my CJPH theory, that is very much real but I'm not forcing you to read it lol

However if you're curious, my inane rambles are further down :}

[Long Rant Post Below]

Okay so I'm gonna start with the basic idea I got it from; that being Nerd. Nerd already foreshadowed the THDPH & the WWPH [Even down to the last song for each of them] Not only that, but he references the stuff hes done in the past as well with a break/pause inbetween.

[This is what I mean]

The first three being all stuff he already did. BDG with Pocket, Tally Hall with Vol.1 & then Cage by Tim Minchin being the start the power hours.

The next two being the power hours he would do after this song [Memento Mori & Charlie's Inferno-Will Wood & That Handsome Devil]. But those are the only songs he would reference in Nerd, leaving no more clues as to what the last one would be. The only thing left in it is the video game references & Stairway to Heaven in the ending. [Which oddly enough also fit the pattern in a way. StH being about dying and the afterlife like Memento Mori & Chonny's Inferno and the video game references being all covers he made on his old channel]

While the VG refs could be a hint at a Videogame or Toby Fox Power Hour, I think at most, if its a clue at all, hinting at the next thing he does is recovering old songs.

----

Next, a couple of his songs reference his past stuff. Fine, I'm Fine has a good amount of lines that vaguely refer back to songs from the before [heres a post that goes more into it that's pretty cool!!]. And more importantly Dear Machine references Pocket, Dream (Outro from Calamity) & wings of wax. Pocket being later used in Nerd & the mention of Icarus coming back in Art. Not only that, but the voice in the very end Thermodynamic Lawyer is the exact same [if not very close to] voice filter/effect he uses in Dear Machine. Even down to the British accent he does in it. [Tho it is fairly normal for a music artist to reference their older songs in their music so it could be nothing]

Speaking of Dear Machine tho, quick thing to add about it is that it shows he not against covering his own songs. While yea technically its just a different version of Ode of the Cog, DM,HtC in a way counts as a cover of OotC. Same goes for bargaining/compromise & The Ballad of Dr. Jekyll.

----

Another idea with a CJPH is that in the CJFS discord theres a "Question of the Day" Channel. Where, as the name says, a Mod or Helper will ask a CJ related question & everyone can give their idea/imput on it. For Day 100, as a special fun lil thing, they asked Chonny if he wanted to give a question for that day. His question being:

And yes he does say that he doesnt plan on doing anything like that in future [if he even were to do it]. I fully believe he wasn't lying there & honestly I never saw him redoing any song ever until I had the idea of a CJPH [aside from stuff like Spring and a Storm & Storm and a Spring obviously]. But this is the best idea I could ever see him doing that. Also that question was from early August so a fair amount of time has passed. Whether thats enough time to equal "at least in the near future at all" I have no clue, but it is a thought.

----

One of my last points [that I remember atm lol] is on how he would end the power hours. Cos like, while yea he does whatever he wants & doesn't rlly follow what anyone says or asks [which I 100% agree with & is completely valid btw], I'd imagine he'd still want to end the PHs with a bang. Which is why I originally didnt think the recent one would be Will Wood.

He's stated a couple of time that hes one of his favorite artist & he definitely knows that a huge chunk of his fan base listen to WW as well. So why not end with that? Why not end with one of the most requested artist people wanted him to cover? Why wouldn't he end with a power hour of the artist that was his #1 on his Spotify Wrapped? What else could he do after that? Well maybe he'd go with his #2 artist? WHICH IS JUST HIMSELF BBYYYY

Plus, the name Power Hour already comes from this:

So it's very likely he's had himself play multiple times in a row & had a "Chonny Jash Power Hour".

Of course theories are just theories so there's always the chance I'm wrong & just insane. And again he does whatever he wants whenever he wants so who knows what it'll be. I just think id be an interesting idea for him to do.

As for how a Chonny Jash Power Hour would look? Maybe each song being a cover of a song from a past album or single? I'd imagine one from the before. & Covered in Discontent [maybe Gothic Whore?]. Like remake Pocket since its been referenced so much, tho that's still just a BDG cover so who knows. the before. would be interesting just to see how his perspective has changed since he originally wrote those songs. Gothic Whore he already has 2 songs that have a story version & a him version so I can see him doing another.

I HIGHLY doubt he'd do anything related to Vol.1 as its his completely separate thing & he doesn't rlly wanna touch any song that's TH/HMS related until whenever he feels like starting Vol.2 [which is valid lol]. If anything I could maybe see like TWWAY, Special or maybe Greener? Or go a different route with the og I'm Gonna Win or like a more outta the box one with like Just a Friend [only cos be did a 20 second "cover" of it in Mucka Blucka]. Again, I do not see him touching anything Vol.1 related but still something to entertain ig? [4th TME cover; The Chonny Electric when/j]

Tho maybe he'd just remake songs that he he fully made [like the before. or Gothic Whore], since those are more of actual Chonny Jash songs rather than the others just being covers. Would be very cool to maybe see a remake of some of his Majora's Mask song tho [no this isn't me coping over HEAL not being on spotify shush]. Or maybe he'd do songs from his old stuff like Don't Take it Personally? [also not me coping over wanting that song on Spotify too]

Idk these are just my thoughts on the idea of a CJPH [or even a Can of Soup Power Hour/j]. Either way I am gonna say idc what he'd do, BDG or Streetlight Manifesto are my other guesses, but anything he makes is always rll good & fun so I'll be interested to see whatever it is.

But ya know considering I typed all this out in the span of an hour & a half I kinda hope im not wrong PFFT

#apologies if there's any grammar or spelling mistakes lol #i just typed a lotta insane ramblings so im bound to mess up somewhere. also i am dyslexic #if you actually managed to read all that. Congrats & thank you :D! Also why tho! you're insane for listening to me being insane/j #I hope I made sense at least #And if you spent any time even glancing at my text thank you a lot but I hope you aren't bored lol #also its still gonna be a bit since he does a power hour but still curious as to ppls ideas of it #at least it BETTER be awhile. bro better take that damn br8k #chonny jash #moss post #KJ is going insane again

70 notes · View notes

orokay · 11 months

Text

So idk if I can really articulate the way I'm feeling rn to translate it perfectly, but I want you guys to know how much I truly appreciate everyone who's followed me over the years, who has interacted with me in any way no matter how small, and anyone who has shown up recently. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. It's probably cheesy to say but everyone here has made my life so much brighter and I feel so unbelievably blessed to have been invited into your lives in some way, even if it's just as someone who sometimes shows up on your dash.

I decided to scroll through my tag on here and the way people have supported me over the years though everything really, deeply touched my heart this evening. The people who have drawn fanart for me, the people who have commissioned me, the people who have tagged me in things (I cringe every time bc I feel soooo bad for not seeing them until I look in my tag once in a blue moon, but know I appreciate you trying to include me), the people who tag me when asked who their art inspirations or favorite blogs are (!!!!!!!!!??????), the people who post their art saying that my art inspired them in some way, people who express their excitement when they realize I've followed them (this will never stop being wild to me, what an incredible thing!!!! I'm just me!) everyone. It's absolutely mind boggling to me and I can't stress enough how much it means.

I've had such an incredible time on this site so far and met some of my closest friends here and just.. wow. Thank you so much to all of you, from the very bottom of my heart. I cannot thank you enough for all of your support!! Every little bit of interaction is a blessing to me and I've run out of ways to express that so I'll wrap this up here but yeah!! I hope you all have a lovely evening or whatever time of day it is in your time zone. Know that you've impacted me in a way I can't express and try to give yourselves a little grace, you'll never know how much you've improved the lives of the people around you by just spending a little time in their space ♥

#i wanted to tag a bunch of my friends bc i saw a lot of people i don't interact with much anymore bc of my reclusiveness in recent years #but i was terrified of accidentally leaving people out so if you're wondering if i'm thinking about you then you're exactly who i mean #love love love love love I'm so incredibly fortunate and i can't forget that!!!!#the fact that i've been on here since 2014 and have only received one mean ask that i can think of is insane #i know i've been a bit of a downer lately but overall my hope is that i've created a positive space where people can be happy and feel safe #in some way in any way #and i hope i feel like someone people can talk to (or at.. i know im bad at replying but i do like to read sjkdlfsd)#i've been told that i may come off as intimidating but i truly don't want to be i want people to feel comfortable interacting ^^#ANYWAY gotta go to bed this is embarrassing thanks for listening byeee #dl #not art #i forgot to mention this but also people who use my art for their pfps???????? SPEECHLESS #all of the art in the world and you chose mine it makes my heart so full #also just realized i completely forgot to respond to emails today #if you see this and you're waiting on one I'll reply tomorrow but know I've gotten it!

92 notes · View notes

prototypelq · 7 days

Text

Pan thoughts because I am normal TM about him:

- Unless Grace shows her interest in him (aka romance route / Let's Dance), Pan is almost absent from the story.

He only appears twice - in the beginning, and at the end for the trial - cause that's a formal procedure all gods have to be present for. There are four optional encounters: if you come meet him before the Reliquary, he'll ask to complete a favour for Asterion, another encounter is handing in that the favour, Medusa encounter, plus the final meeting before the trial. Freddie is present with Grace for the most of the game, Apollo - has at least 6 encounters, even if you don't play the game with him (apartment, Underworld, Aphrodite's Party, Hades, Trial), Persephone - 3 encounters (Underworld, Hades, Trial). Back to Pan - none of the gods really speak about him. Except Persephone and Apollo, who are trying to both dismiss and point fingers at him at the beginning. After that, none of the gods ever mentions Pan again.

It's almost like he is very much an outsider among the pantheon, probably right until he needs a favour, or somebody needs his favours.

- It's kind of logical that Pan is the outsider in the pantheon, if you think about it thematically. All the other gods have clear niches they control and keep in order. Nature is anything But order, in fact, if nature is anything - it finds order only in constant struggle or the constant redefining of scale, in Change. So yeah, a god of Dis-order could very much be antithetical to other gods of Order. If Calliope was looking to shake things up, then he would certainly be one of her first choices for allies in her quest.

- This makes it easy to understand how exactly Pan got tangled up in the whole mess. He span his web of favours, which were all small little things (probably), but it caught a prey so big Pan was stunned so hard, his agency basically went out the window, until the case was closed.

- Okay, now for the particular lines in different versions of I Can Teach You (aka Lost Girls, Time To Shine and Morning Fades), if, For Some Reason you haven't finished the game yet - please do. It's short and definitely worth your time, cause it's amazing. also I really need to talk about this so Big Tangent Ahead

I'll do these song by song.

Morning Fades - It's in the name of the song - Pan is... pretty much the only god who reminds Grace she is or a strict timer. Every other god, by some reason or another - drags her into their own problems, which she helps to solve, and only after that can she make progress in the case. You know. While being sentenced to death in a week. Grace has to solve the problems these gods have been brewing in for, at least, decades AND prove her innocence, so her sentence to death can be prevented. Pan is the only one, who reminds Grace, multiple times, that 'Time's a wasting', she needs to hurry, and doesn't take any more of her time than he should.

Morning fades and the day wastes away, Grace You can't wait, Grace, don't delay

Another line, that gives us a very clear insight into Pan is this line right here:

This Freddie is a friend you can use, but this isn't playtime Time to choose

You get this line only in the purest form of Morning Fades (aka all blue), in which Pan leads unsure Grace along through the song, but Freddie is ignored and she does a final solo to try to get through to Grace. Pan sings those lines with remorse, he values the devotion Freddie demonstrates, even if he did call her Lost Girl a few times throughout the song. But despite his own lines - previously they were Time To Play, now that time is over, cause the song is over. This is the time to solve murder of a goddess, and while Pan does not like dividing the girls, he sees there is no place for Freddie in this adventure, and thinks that it would be too dangerous for her.

There will be more evidence of Pan's personal motivation later, I have only just remembered the Green version of Morning Fades, and it's very interesting. This is the song where Grace tries to follow Pan's advice and direction in her first steps, then gets carried away by the song and her bestie into their own fun musical, all while ignoring Pan.

You think you don't need me, just cause' you can't read me

This line is quite straightforward - Pan knows he is acting shady, but reinforces that his intentions are genuine, if only the girls could see through their first impression of him.

Time To Shine - now, this version is interesting, cause here we have Grace who is rebelling against every possible notion of control, or even help, and Pan loves this song anyway. This song proves that Pan was honestly just trying to help (and quieten the misguided guilt he feels), so as long as Grace can use her power and has a mind sharp enough to find the proof the needs - he is satisfied. And he really is! It's clear from the get-go that Grace is independent, clever and fiery enough to handle everything herself, so he rolls along with her, confident in her abilities.

Actually, in this version he is quieter than normal - he throws a line about Freddie, but otherwise between the first Time to Shine and the star scene chorus he keeps silent - Grace wants spotlight, so he steps aside to hear her out.

Yes! This is your time! Time to shine!

It's also fun that, in his first verse he always Grace to hurry up, here instead he is getting so excited about her number that he throws in

Yes, a solo! Go for it, we got time! (solo) Grace, you're starting to comprehend Let me show you more, or show me the door!

He sings that line very excitedly, which is very silly and fun xD. It is to be expected then, that Pan joins in Grace's final Time To Shine chorus almost instantly.

Lost Girls - this song is very interesting, cause in this version the girls are pretty much dismissing Pan completely, and fully give into the song, they get carried away to have their own fun musical number. This time Pan has to ground them back into reality - in other versions he gets excited over the number, well, not in this one. This Pan is grumpy - his advice is being dismissed, he is not taken seriously, and he cannot fully deliver the message he wants to convey, or the lesson he wants Grace to learn.

Grace: Lost girls, lost girls, you all love your lost girls, A rescue that you can take home Pan: I won't say you need saving, you're not drowning, you're waving

In this first Lost Girls verse he is still being playful, but even in the beginning he has to placate with both hands that he is not a danger and only wants to help. But if Grace keeps ignoring Pan's advice, he starts to get more serious.

You're lucky I got to you There's people who'll come for you I'm hurt you're making so much ado You're lost and I'm trying to help!

Okay so, knowing the events of the game, I can't be the only one thinking of Aphrodite here, right? That's my best guess as to what Pan is referring. The girls keep on getting carried away, and he has to just straight-up state he only wants to help.

Interesting, that even after being ignored and rightfully grumpy about that, Pan is still willing to join into the trio singing together. He's also delighted by that solo is particular xD

I never knew I had that in me!

Even after half a song, Freddie still keeps freaking out about the whole 'musical' thing, and to that Pan says, with a literal facepalm:

You don't understand Nothing for Grace will ever be the same!

If Grace goes for the full song here and green ending, then Grace and Eddie happily continue singing their troubles away, and at this, Pan really gets frustrated. So much so, that he goes plainspeak, even though the Green Lost Girls solo seems to be his favourite moment in any variation of I Can Teach you.

Really? Now you're just being silly Maybe the Muse isn't feeling the gravity? Or do you refuse and, like ostriches, happily stick your heads in the sand? Grace, I could be your right hand Freddie, you'd better leave her alone Let me do what I do, or she'll sink like a stone

The way Pan keeps on insisting so hard that Grace needs someone's guidance has me thinking that either there have been accidents with new idols, who were unable to control their powers properly before, or maybe it was his own personal struggle with control over the abilities, and he was wishing hard for someone's help at the time.

It's also weird that he keeps on pressing that Grace needs assistance here, even after she has choreographed an entire musical number right before his very eyes, all without a hitch, and she is clearly a natural. For some reason the way Grace and Freddie get so much carried away scares him particularly? Then again, in the Time to Shine versions Pan is perfectly fine with letting Grace do whatever she wants, because she demonstrated skill and independence. In this version, she demonstrates the same things, but uses them to have a song with her bestie, and This triggers Pan for a reason. Interesting.

Kind of a similar situation happens with Green version of Morning Fades, actually. The end of the song has Pan start the usual Morning Fades chorus, but then the girls come in and literally steal the spotlight from him, and this forces Pan into plainspeak.

Pan: You think I'm the danger? You have no idea. I wouldn't blame you for wanting to hide, But do we make merry or should you get ready? Finally grow up and take it outside. Grace: So wait, are you saying you won't work with Freddie? Pan: She couldn't be less qualified

A stark contrast to the original full-blue Morning Fades, where Pan regrets dividing the girls, isn't it.

So Pan has mentally allowed a very specific fun-zone, meaning this one musical number, which he is happy and excited to engage in, but he won't let the girls get carried away with their fun forever, and tries very hard to ground them back if they do.

#thank you for reading this #this has been sponsored by pan being pan #meaning utterly irresistible and insanely adorable #'no shining knight here im only here for the dance' (can you hear me crying)#what is that if not a proposal and Grace Accepts okay i cant have it any other way #but not before 1000000000 self-worth and therapy sessions okay pan my dear you can't call yourself tumor without repercussions #sorry not sorry for going crazy because of a fictional man #it will happen again #stray gods #stray gods pan #stray gods the roleplaying musical

12 notes · View notes