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therealvinelle · 3 years

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You or The Muffin made a post on your dream cast(s), but I’m not really familiar with those references/actors (with the exception of Bowie and Jean Claude Van Damme and Clint Eastwood I think you mentioned). Is there anyone you would choose that’s a little more recent (80s-present)?

Our dream cast.

Our dream voice cast, for those interested.

Fun fact, both those posts were composed together, so yeah we share these opinions. We composed this one together as well.

Keep in mind that this list is... well it's for Twilight as I would make it. Which means that of course we’re casting a Didyme, nevermind that she’s been dead for thousands of years, but Denali who?

And once again we’re disrupting the time-space continuum and casting big name actors you’ve definitely heard about as they were ten, twenty, or thirty years ago.

Alright, so newer and shinier Twilight fancast, this time with a few alternatives because decisions are hard:

Alice: ... Audrey Hepburn.

I'm sorry. I tried. I tried to be modern, but I got to Alice and originally we thought Saoirse Ronan, appearances be damned because Ronan is a great actress, only to realize Ronan should be Renesmée.

So we're back to the dream cast. Audrey Hepburn was a tiny, pixie-like, yet ridiculously beautiful woman. Like Alice, her growth was stunted due to prolonged starvation during the War, so she's the perfect casting in a way no modern Western actress is going to be. She was also an amazing actress, just absolutely magnetic each time she graced the screen. She would be a fantastic Alice.

Aro: A young Tom Cruise.

Cruise is an absurdly beautiful man, and at 173 cm he is the right stature as I could never cast a tall actor for Aro. He's a very good actor, so I'm sure he'd be up for it. Also, he'd look great with chalky petrified vampire makeup on. He'd pull it off. I want to see this.

Optionally: Cate Blanchett

Yes, she's a woman. But that's what acting is all about, you play someone you're not. It's more a thing in theatre than in film that men can play women and women can play men, but I say fuck the rules, we're doing it theatre style. And Blanchett absolutely have that enigmatic, ethereal, otherworldly quality I'd want for Aro.

Bella: A young Sarah Michelle Gellar

Gellar is a petite beauty, she is spunky yet adorable, and very charming, the people of Forks and the Cullens would very believably gravitate towards her. Most importantly she has the acting chops to pull it off. She would portray an amazing Bella.

Caius: Daniel Craig

The man is the right age, he's someone you don't mess with. Craig has perhaps a touch too charismatic, but he's good enough that I'm hopeful he could tune it down.

Carlisle: A young Leonardo DiCaprio

DiCaprio is ridiculously attractive and has a bad case of The Babyface™. Watching him try to convince people that he’s 30 years old and has adult kids would be absolutely hilarious, and very faithful to the books. He’s a talented actor, too, very versatile.

Optionally: David Tennant

Tennant doesn't look the part, he is handsome but handsome in that particular way when flawed features come together handsomely. He does however have the perfect charm, gravitas, and energy for the character, so I think he could make a great Carlisle.

This is where the magic of movie adaptions come in - you’re not going to be able to translate directly from text to screen, that’s impossible. If you embrace that and make some bold choices, you stand to make a truly spectacular adaption. One of the reasons why the Twilight films failed is that they were too faithful to the books while failing to understand the spirit of them, whereas the TV miniseries adaption of His Dark Materials switched a lot of things up and is absolutely amazing for it.

Demetri: Robert Downey Jr.

Ridiculously charismatic and talented actors cast in bit parts and making them shine is a passion of mine.

Didyme: Cate Blanchett

Look, Blanchett had to be in this somehow, and we could think of no one more appropriate. She has too much enigma for Esme, is too womanly for Alice, and once the idea for Didyme was had it was hard to weasel out of.

Cate Blanchett would be convincing as Aro's sister, as a woman who haunts her lover and brother even thousands of years after her passing, an enigmatic and divine woman who can never be forgotten.

Also she's my fancast for her brother, so this works out quite nicely. Why cast someone who merely looks like Aro’s actor when you can just cast the same actor.

Edward: A young Johnny Depp

Very few men are otherworldly beautiful. There are countless handsome men, yes, and many beautiful ones, but Depp has extreme and symmetrical features that come together beautifully. Robert Pattinson does too, for the record, so what makes me prefer Depp is the fact that he is an incredible actor. Pattinson is good, but Depp is the kind of talent who can power through even the worst scripts, give him nothing and he will give you the world. He’s on Al Pacino’s level, this man can salvage anything.

Emmett: Terry Crews

Terry Crews is a mountain of a man, he's massive. He'd nail Emmett's infectious cheer, too. He has a very symmetrical and attractive face that follows the golden ratio beautifully, so I could buy him being a vampire.

Esme: Anne Hathaway ten years ago. Ref one, ref two.

She’s out of this world beautiful and has the perfect Esme aesthetic. Hands down best Esme. The fact that she’s a very good actress helps.

Felix: Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson

He’s got the physique for the part and would be absolutely menacing.

James: Brad Pitt

Brad Pitt is a character actor who tragically got lost in the blockbuster scene. He’s good, he deserves cool parts. So yeah, Pitt as James. I think he’d be absolutely amazing for the part, it’d be the kind of performance where you can tell the actor was enjoying every second on set.

Jane and Alec: Child Dakota Fanning

Fanning was a good choice for Jane, it's just that she was slightly too old when she was cast (and they made her look even older!) and the screenwriters had written a different character than the one in the books (and not for the better - I’m all for changing things in an adaption! But, well, she was Marvel levels of bad villain). And as Alec is a bit part and supposed to be nearly identical to her, I’d just have Fanning play him as well.

Jasper: Clint Eastwood, every time.

Optionally: feels like blasphemy to even have an “optionally”, but here we are. If you somehow haven’t heard of the guy, then… er. No, sorry, I’ve got nothing. Know that I tried, though.

Marcus: Tom Holland

The man has such babyface, which fits since Marcus is 19.

Just Tom Holland, sitting around, looking young and depressed.

Renata: A young Natalie Portman

Yes, yes, Renata is a bit part, I know that, but this is my Twilight we're casting for so I do what I want.

Portman fits the physical description for Renata, and I find that description to be relevant to her character. She's a teeny tiny woman charged with protecting the most important man in the world, and gifted with intouchability. Portman looks is beautiful enough to fit the bill for a Twilight vampire, and tiny enough to stress the absurdity of this 5′0″ woman being anybody’s bodyguard, nevermind Aro’s.

Renesmée: Child Saoirse Ronan (Though Adult Ronan works too, she’s my cast for the hybrid gremlin period.)

She was an extraordinarily talented child actress, and she’s beautiful while odd-looking. I could absolutely believe I was looking at an otherworldly hybrid when looking at her.

Mostly I think Renesmée is going to be a very hard part for anybody, as the given actor will be portraying one of the most ridiculed characters in recent pop culture. It’ll take major talent to get the audience to care about Renesmée, but I think Ronan, if anybody, could do it.

Rosalie: Margot Robbie ten years ago

She’s out of this world beautiful, and more importantly she’s an incredible actress. She would be incredible for the part.

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shushiyuii · 3 years

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Unexpected Uncle

If one remembers correctly it is Monarch Monday which means its Ronan appreciation day which means Roman gets spoiled with love so Roan take my fucking love you handsome devil-

Also first fic yaaayyy, I’m doing this based on memory so i’m sorry if i got some things wrong- (inervoushelp)

Warnings: Injury (Nobody dies), Captivity, swearing i think? (If i forgot anything please let me know-)

For @baka-monarch

Words: 1K ish

Tommy had recently finished tending to his farm, and it seems Tubbo has been quite busy as of late been busy with chores to do around the village, so he was just left to be swimming in the wide ocean.

He wasn’t alone though, he had his friend Ranboo by his side, who was constantly trying to keep up with him, he honestly found it quite hilarious since Ranboo is so small compared to him and he can see Ranboo swimming around his tentacles, trying to gain speed to keep up with him. Tommy isn’t that much of an ass though, he does keep Ranboo the occasional boost if needed.

He sighed and decided to take a break, well for Ranboo anyways, a couple of easy swims isn’t quite so easy for a tiny Mer like Ranboo. He chuckled “You alright there, Big man?”. He sat there as Ranboo swam up to his face, which took a good minute. “I-I’m fine! You sure swim fast though...”. He said in between pants for his breath.

Before Tommy could even begin communication with his friend, Ranboo’s attention seemed to be elsewhere, as he went to ask, he was interrupted by Ranboo asking, “Tommy, have you destroyed any ships recently?”.

Tommy raised an eyebrow in confusion, he hadn’t taken down any ships in a while since no pirates have dared come near the town for a while, the only ships he’s seen is Puffy's and the other villagers. Oh no.

Tommy went into alert towards the boat to investigate, he hoped it wasn’t one of the villagers, had they been attacked by Mers? Had he not kept an eye on them?!

His heart pounded out of his chest as he surfaced the water, taking a close look at the damage.

He exhaled in relief as it wasn’t one of his own, but something did catch his interest, it appeared to be a net of some sort, containing something. In fact, it was one of the only remnants left of the ship. Heck even the cause of what happened to this boat was unclear.

Ranboo soon surfaced beside him, looking at Tommy in concern, “You alright?”, “Fine, don’t worry. It’s nobody we know”. Tommy reached a hand out to Ranboo in comfort, but before Ranboo could even begin to comfort Tommy, they both heard a strange sound. It came from the net.

Tommy wrapped a hand around Ranboo and brought him towards his chest as he glared at the net in alarm. But his glare changed from one of anger to concern as the nets sound became a lot clearer. It was a baby Mers chirps. Tommy looked down at Ranboo and he seemed just as concerned.

Tommy used his other hand to poke at the net, in response, there was a chirp of alert. It seemed whatever was in this net was a baby mer. “Ranboo, could you open the net for me please?”.

Ranboo immediately went into action and swam quickly towards it, trying to get whatever baby in this net out. What was a baby Mer doing in a net-like this?

The most likely conclusion was that a ship had captured a baby Mer and whatever happened to the ship got it destroyed, leaving this Mer to suffer in this net. Leaving to now Tommy’s and Ranboo’s responsibility to save the poor Mer.

After a while of fiddling with the net Ranboo finally got it loose and held onto the baby Mer. The baby Mer seemed weak with injuries covering their head and arms, they were a light pink colour with a semblance of green too. Their grip barely had any strength to it. It broke Ranboo’s heart to see them like this, Tommy’s too.

Tommy held out his hand to Ranboo, to which he swam into. Ranboo was then held into a somewhat tight grip, enough to keep him safe when travelling at fast paces. And the second Tommy was sure they were safe, he swam as fast as possible back to the village.

A couple of hours later.

“So let me get this straight, you both found this baby Mer stuck in a net out in the sea?” Tubbo concluded after being told of their recent adventure.

Tommy sat with Tubbo in his human form on the rock and beside them a pond of water, big enough to hold a couple of Mers, and with them in the water was Ranboo, the baby Mer beside him also, laying in his arms, covered in bandages from his injuries. He was fast asleep after their tough day.

“Yeah, and the thing is, we don’t know what to do with the lil’ guy since well, I doubt Wilbur’s up to taking care of another kid since Fundy’s already a handful, doubt Karl would want a kid and I have no idea who else would care for him.”. Tommy explained.

Tubbo didn’t respond initially, he just stared down at the small baby Mer for a moment, the mer was just to put it simply adorable and had gained a spot in Tubbo’s heart, the same could be said for Ranboo and Tommy.

“Mine.”. Tubbo said in a low tone. “What?” Both Tommy and Ranboo looked at Tubbo in confusion. “Mine”. Tubbo stood up from his spot in the rocks and climbed down to a point where he could interact with the baby Mer, he gently put his hand on the Mers's face.

“Tubbo, you’re acting like a clingy Tommy right now”. Ranboo snorted at his platonic husband’s behaviour, Tubbo looked up at him in annoyance. “HEY BITCH! I HEARD THAT Y’KNOW!”. Tommy stomped his foot and stood his ground.

“SHHH!”. They quickly snapped, not wanting the baby to be awoken. Ranboo sighed, “Tubbo, we can’t necessarily take care of a kid, we’re just kids ourselves”. “Don’t care, he’s ours now. I’m naming him Michael”.

And from that point on, Tubbo and Ranboo became parents, and Tommy became an uncle. It luckily didn’t take too long for Michael to recover, only with a couple of scars but he proved to be a very happy and friendly Mer. He loves spending time with his family. And not so long ago Tubbo gave him a little chicken plush he named Benson.

(Now i go back to my corner-)

#mcyt g/t #g/t #krackinnit au #giant!tommy #tiny!tubbo #tiny!ranboo #tiny!michael #mer!tommy #baka-monarch #mcytg/t #Shushi’s writing

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willowbird · 4 years

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Congrats!! If you want, how about the first time Ronan sleeps over at St. Agnes? Like the pining!!

Yay! I was SO EXCITED to get a Ronan/Adam ask!! I may have gone a little overboard with the pining, but I hope you still like it <3 <3 This is actually my first Pynch ficlet! I hope you like it! Lemme know if you think I should post it on AO3 ^^; Since it’s my first time actually writing them and I haven’t read the books as many times as I’ve read AFTG I hope it’s okay!

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Ronan bounced the rubber ball against the sloped ceiling from where he lay on Adam’s bed, waiting for the other boy to get out of the shower. He’d been out, just driving around with no discernable purpose or direction, when it came around that time for Parrish to get out of work so he’d swung by and picked him up. There’d been no reason to say no when Adam had asked if he wanted to come up for a while. After all, he and Adam were friends -- no matter how much they seemed to bicker -- and Ronan liked being at St. Agnes. Sometimes, it was honestly more satisfying to be there than it was to be at Monmouth. Nothing beat being at the Barnes, but still -- St. Agness had a particular energy, it always had.

After all, Ronan Lynch was no stranger to St. Agnes. The hours he’d spent in the quiet pews could stack together to build a universe apart from the rest of the world, a separate realm that even the horrors inside his own mind couldn’t touch. And yet, since Adam came to live there, the hallowed halls of that familiar place had developed a completely new,,, feeling that Ronan had no idea how to feel about.

A part of Ronan wanted to be pissed off about it.

A bigger part of Ronan was fascinated in the way that the travelers in his father’s stories had always been fascinated by the glow of will-o’-the-wisps between the branches of the deep woods and frosted bogs. The peace that the church had once given him was spiked with something else now, something that fizzed like pop-rocks under his skin, and as annoying as that was -- he really couldn’t say that he hated it.

Considering he knew that the fizz of... enchantment was most definitely caused by the boy now living in that small, slanted room above the church? No, he really couldn’t say that he hated it at all.

Not to say that Adam I’ll-be-independent-if-it-kills-me Parrish didn’t make him want to punch his fist through a fucking brick wall -- because he absolutely did. But there was also something... undeniably right about the boy taking up residence above the church. After all, the infuriating pest already lived full time inside his head, he might as well sleep in the building that housed Ronan’s soul as well. At least he was fucking consistent.

The shabby door connecting the bedroom to the tiny bathroom creaked open and Ronan caught the ball on its rebound and didn’t throw it again, instead turning his head to look as Adam entered the room.

He did not expect to see Adam walk into the bedroom in nothing but a towel and instantly looked back up at the ceiling, throwing the ball again with a bit more force than necessary. Only his quick reflexes saved him from losing a fucking eye. He tried not to think about the way the other boy’s skin had been flushed pink from the heat of the shower, his hair damp and pushed haphazardly back from his face, exposing cheekbones and eyes that...

Okay, he tried -- that didn’t mean he succeeded.

“Sorry, it’ll just be a minute. I forgot to grab something to change into.” Adam’s voice was soft, lilted with the Henrietta accent in the way that only happened when he was either really emotional or perfectly at ease. Ronan would never tell him how much he loved hearing the edge of gravel and wild country grass around his vowels, not on pain of death, but that didn’t make it any less true.

“Take your time, Parrish. I don’t fucking care.” No one needed to know that the sigh that followed was relief at how nonchalant he had managed to make the words, instead of the dry irritation it sounded like.

Adam huffed a soft laugh and Ronan could feel the eye-roll being directed at him. He didn’t bother to hide his grin, just gave it a bit more teeth as he tossed the ball up and caught it again.

It was only another few minutes before the door creaked open again and Adam came out -- this time fully clothed. Ronan caught the ball and sat up, scooting over so that Adam could come over and sit down, which the other boy did with a flourish and a groan.

“Ugh, I just do not wanna do homework.”

“Then don’t.” Ronan shrugged and bounced the ball on the floor this time, angling it slightly so that when it rebounded it went toward Adam.

Adam caught it easily and bounced it back, timed perfectly with a familiar scoff. “Some of us care about school, you know.” Ronan waited for a beat, but when Adam didn’t follow that up with chastisement or prod for him to start caring about school, he gave a small shrug.

“Sure, but tomorrow is Saturday. It isn’t like you’ve got anything due tomorrow. You just got off work, learn how to fucking relax.” He caught the ball and held it for a moment, tilting his head back as he mimicked a thoughtful expression. “Oh, oh that’s right, you don’t know how to relax.” He gave a deep, mournful sigh and bounced the ball back at him. “Shame, for man so smart to be missing such a vital real-life skill.”

“Ha ha, you’re hilarious,” Adam sniped back, but his words were sharpened more with amusement than irritation.

“Oh, I know. I’m a regular comedy special,” Ronan agreed readily. “But that, actually, was not a joke.” He could press here. He could remind Adam that his whole world didn’t need to be as rigid as he was making it to be. He could tell him that he could afford to take a break every now and then, that he deserved to chill the fuck out. But if he did that he risked sounding too much like Gansey or repeating an argument that neither of them probably felt like jumping into tonight. So instead, he caught the ball and cocked his head, studying the other boy curiously.

Then he asked, “Where would you go? If you could go anywhere in the world with no consequences. What would you do? And not to accomplish anything great or whatever -- I’m talking just for fun.”

Adam held up his hand for the ball and Ronan tossed it to him. His eyes caught on the way he began to roll it between his palms, those long fingers curling around it, bony wrists twisting to pass it from one hand to the other. Ronan had the sudden urge to brush his lips over the prominent bump in each wrist. Not in a kiss -- but just to feel the protrusion against his mouth.

“That’s pretty broad,” Adam said with a hum, oblivious to his distraction. “There’s a lot of places I could go.”

“That’s the point. There’s no consequences, no limits. You could go anywhere.” He dragged his gaze away from those hands but this time they caught on the exposed bit of Adam’s collarbone on the way up to his face. “So pick a place, Parrish. Never known you to be so indecisive.”

Adam’s eyes dropped from where they’d been thoughtfully searching the ceiling, locking onto his as he flashed a sharp smirk. That expression cut him right between the ribs, twisted, and nestled in nice and deep for the winter -- because this, this was the Adam Parrish he couldn’t stop thinking about. Everyone seemed to underestimate him. Everyone thought he was so soft, thought he was so polite and sweet and yeah sure, he was all of those things, but that was only one part of him. It was just the surface setting to the multiverse that was Adam Parrish, and this sharp, biting, cunning side of him was closer to his core. Ronan knew he was one of the only people who knew that side was there, and was probably the only person who truly understood how much a part of him that facet was.

“All right,” he said, his voice smooth and low and Ronan had the distinct certainty that if that sound were a drink it would be a spiked mulled cider, husky and tart in a way that made your head light and your chest warm. “I’ll play. But you go first. Where would you go? Somewhere outside of the States,” he added, before Ronan could say the Barnes -- because he was apparently that predictable.

Ronan rolled his eyes, but shrugged and slipped off the bed, laying on the floor beside the bed and pillowing his hands under his head as he thought. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Adam stretch out on the bed on his stomach, hugging a pillow and using it to prop his head up a bit as he looked down at Ronan. The feel of Adam’s full and undivided attention on him did things to his pulse he didn’t want to think about.

“Probably Ireland,” he finally said after a long moment of thought that was torn up and distributed between flickers of distraction caused by Adam’s silhouette in his peripheral, from the way his damp hair was falling into his eyes now that it was beginning to dry all the way to the slump of his broad shoulders and the sharp jut of his elbows against the cushions. There just really wasn’t any part of Adam Parrish that Ronan didn’t want to look at.

A soft huff of laughter had Ronan turning his head to look at him straight on and the amusement on the other boy’s face told him that he was being predictable again. Ronan frowned -- he didn’t like being predictable.

“Don’t give me that look. Tell me why, Ronan Lynch.” There was a teasing note in Adam’s voice, and if it were anyone else that would have brought Ronan’s back up -- would have made him snap his teeth and snarl. Coming from Adam, he had to give himself a moment so he didn’t trip over his own foolish tongue.

Somehow he managed to avoid that humiliation. Instead, he told Adam about Ireland through his father’s eyes. He told himself he didn’t care about the softening of Adam’s smile, that it did absolutely nothing to him to watch the other boy close his eyes and rest his cheek on the pillow, leaving himself vulnerable as he dipped into his own thoughts. Rather, he focused on the stories he was telling Adam, reliving them as he did his best impression of his father’s cadence and storyteller’s hum. He told him stories about the fair folk, the fey and the night creatures. He told him about the magic of each valley and river and dale. He shared his favorite tales about cheeky brownies and powerful, dangerous sidhe that became captivated by the bright, fleeting magic of a human’s ability to create.

Adam listened to each one, and that smile...? It never faded, not even once.

“It’s your turn,” Ronan finally said, when his heart was full and his lungs tight -- torn between the memories caused by those stories and these newer, more electric feelings caused by the proximity of Adam Parrish’s smile.

“Mm, I think... I think that if I were to go anywhere in the world I’d want to see high mountains. High mountains and dark woods. Deep lakes. Flowers that seem to have their own language between the brightness of their colors and the way they sway toward and away from each other in a wind that affects them and them alone. Butterflies that cast shadows like birds of prey...” As he spoke his words drew further and further apart, his tone drifting as fatigue from the long day dragged him down toward sleep.

Ronan held his breath, almost wanting to prod him for more -- because it was rare to hear Adam talk... well, like a dreamer. Adam was a boy who kept himself grounded so deeply in reality it was sometimes painful for Ronan to be around him. This secret side of him, this side of dreams and hope and wonder... it was a vulnerable side that he knew Adam wouldn’t be indulging in if he weren’t perfectly comfortable and probably way more tired than he’d originally thought he was. It was a side of him that Ronan had always known existed (you couldn’t chase a dead Welsh king without being at least part whimsy, no matter how charismatic Gansey was) but one that Adam kept very close to the chest.

“Mm... Ronan?” Adam’s voice was soft and sleep-slurred, his eyelashes shielding the color of his eyes, he was barely able to keep them open.

“Yeah?” Ronan’s voice was rough, even to his own ears, but Adam didn’t seem to notice.

“Do you think a place like that actually exists?” The question was light, but there was a raw, sweet shard of hope beneath the words that cut Ronan in a tender space below his throat.

“Yes,” Ronan promised with certainty, not even needing to think about it -- not even needing to question it. “I know it does.”

Adam’s eyes dropped all the way closed and he smiled, sighing in relief. That sigh transitioned directly into the deep, slow breaths of sleep.

Ronan knew that he should get up. Sleeping on the floor would give him one hell of a backache, and Adam hadn’t said he could stay over. He should get up and stretch, then drive back to Monmouth, where he should crawl into his own bed for the night -- or maybe stay up longer and bother Gansey, because fuck knew that guy didn’t understand the concept of a regulated sleeping schedule.

Instead, Ronan watched Adam until his own eyes just couldn’t stay open any longer. Then, from the floor of St. Agnes, beside the boy who called to him like a fire-sprite, Ronan dreamed. He dreamed of dark woods and flowers that seemed to have their own language, between their bright colors and the way they swayed in their own self-contained breezes. He dreamed of butterflies that cast shadows like birds of prey. He dreamed of safe places even in the dark woods -- and when Ronan dreamed... well, when Ronan dreamed, reality itself seemed to listen.

#asks #anon #trc #pynch #pynch fic #fanfic #adam parrish #ronan lynch #pining #trc fanfic #adam parrish x ronan lynch #sleepovers!#my writing #100 followers #the raven cycle

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kategrac · 3 years

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MI spoilers <3

I just want to thank Maggie for Deklo’s arc in MI - it’s hilarious and extremely entertaining that he ditched everything to become a trophy husband and art crime buff with only the prompt of a teasing postcard - I loved reading his scenes and will continue to love them when I give it multiple rereads.

(btw this rambling is just for my sake and not at all original or unique not meant to sound patronising in any way!)

But on a deeper level, this means so much to me; We finally see him pursuing his wants and enjoying his life after repressing his desires for as long as he can remember - the act of repressing such things was in itself a rejection of his father (or, more likely, his perspective of his father): selfishly doing what he liked without caution. the whole idea of repressing his desires can be seen as the reactionary opposite to ‘dreaming’ - even the words ‘desire’ and ‘dream’ are interchangeable, and (as his repetition in his internal monologue in CDTH of ‘I hate my father’ shows) he's convinced himself for so long that he can't have happiness or relax because of the reckless behaviours of the dreamers in his life.

- this repression of himself was sucking the soul/life-force (or essence or whatever you wish to call it) out of him, and seeing him come alive again just by letting go and moving on is SO CATHARTIC :’) (also ! very symbolic of Maggie to end the book on Jordan saying to Declan “im awake” - yes you are boy! they both are! oh boy they're so good and healthy for each other)

He’s now realising he doesn't need to hide, his family is not something to be ashamed of, as he realises when he starts attending bars and events and realises that not every single person he meets (people who know about Ronan and Niall’s dreaming) is there to kill or harm him/his brothers. I love the moment when he realises the distinction between ‘goals’ and ‘wants’, realising that joy in the moment and human connection is so much more important than mindlessly working towards something you don't even want. truth/true self/self-expression overpowers lies. hiding and repression as a reaction to recklessness isn't always the healthiest, a balance of caution and impulsivity is important. thanks Maggie I love it.

I think in this sense the talk of marriage was so important; Declan (personality-wise) is always focused on the future and how to act in a certain way to achieve a certain outcome, hence why he was previously always on edge and taking precautions to make everything about his life more mundane/boring/ignorable, he believed it was the best way to keep Matthew and Ronan safe. It makes sense for him to think about the next action in his life out of habit, but that next action can be something positive and loving. the future doesn't have to be frightening or full of danger, it can be filled with love and promise instead. one of the best methods I know of for moving on from trauma is to have positive and exciting upcoming events to put your mind on instead of dwelling on negative past - a hard thing to do but can really help. Life can be great, and life moves on, but in order for that to happen you must provide good things for yourself; perspective is important. Declan didn't even hesitate to mention how much he loves Jordan and wants to spend his future with her, and I love it so so much. instead of treating the future as something dangerous, he is beginning to view it as exciting and full of life and love and peace.

I know many of us theorised that he would go apeshit and release all his pent up rage this book, but I'm so so glad and pleasantly surprised that the opposite happened. He finds release in such a beautiful and healthy way, one much more effective (and much more satisfying) than continuing to hate his past. - Declan being a good role model? iconic

(sorry this was long! if you made it this far, ily. what was your favourite Declan moment?)

#mi spoilers #mister impossible #mister impossible spoilers #Declan Lynch #declan x jordan #jordeclan #jordan henessey #bryde #maggie stiefvater #matthew lynch

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jordantheehennessy · 3 years

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what were your favorite lynch brothers moments in mi (whether together or apart)

declan and matthew are absolutely hilarious together. declan is just idgaf about your identity crisis <3, repress it so we can do important things like CHECK THE MAIL. and at one point he was all why don't you just say you want a therapist for your birthday 🙄? like!! declan is such a cunt i want matthew to defenstrate him at least once. seriously this guy tried One (1) Single Time to "dispense comfort" and he was like so weird how that didnt make my chronic ibs go away better not try it ever again. anyway sorry your whole life was a lie i guess but im trying to make sure my scarf looks right. ciao 😚

and oh man thinking about it i think the three brothers only get one scene with all of them together ?? declan and matthew are driving over to boston when ronan calls. it's a little heartbreaking to juxtapose this scene with the one at he beginning of cdth. there's so much tension and bad blood between them and theyre trying so hard to keep things forms falling apart and..... and it just doesn't work ): BUT matthew does call out declan for thinking with his dick so thats funny. good for him <33

#asks and answers

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vexedtonightmares · 3 years

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So like the relationships in raven cycle sometimes confuse me 😂😂 so blue and gansey are together right? And Ronan and Adam are. But I see so much stuff of like Ronan and gansey and even Adam and blue and I’m like wait what’s happening is everybody together at some point ?? Or is it just intensity all around and then they fall into the relationships that they end up in lol

Sorry anon that was questioning relationships of the raven cycle but also I saw in some places that gansey is bi but had like a reverse thing happen where he thought he was gay but surprise he actually likes a girl. Is that canon or is that a head cannon 😂😂

LOL honestly i do not blame you for being confused 💀 the only canon relationships throughout the series are blue x adam, blue x gansey, and adam x ronan BUT they are also all canonically at least a little bit in love with each other, platonic or not, and have very intense feelings for one another all around, so it’s very easy to expand on these dynamic, as you’ve probably seen in fandom spaces 🤪 also the gansey thing is a headcanon but i feel like it’s a very widely accepted one and i personally think it’s hilarious and 100% true

#asks

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astudyinfreewill · 4 years

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dear adambra, can u spare a chainsaw & adam bonding time with a pinch (heh) of ronan pining for this trying times 😔👊

vila!!! 💕sorry it took me so long but i finally got around to this. i hope you like it! 😚 (and anon – i hope you don’t mind that i joined these two prompts!! 💞)

this and more i sat divining

1.3k, fluff, (sort-of-mutual) pining, pre-relationship (takes place before trk)

read on ao3

The thing of it was, Ronan thought glumly, that Chainsaw was a filthy little traitor.

It was hard enough to stop himself from spilling all of his secrets in front of Parrish; he didn’t need his psychopomp – one of his own secrets! – to expose him like this.

Ronan had spent a long time trying to hide the truth of his feelings from himself. He had done this by keeping them mired in self-loathing and buried under self-destructiveness. But something had changed over the summer.

Why do you hate yourself?

I don’t.

And he didn’t, not anymore. Not much, anyway. There were good days and bad days; but the important thing was that once that wall had crumbled – once Ronan had started loving himself again – he’d cautiously dared to reach out to the rest of his feelings, including the ones he felt for a certain over-tired, stubborn, car-fixing, uncanny, beautiful-handed magician.

The problem was that once he’d started – once he’d thrown open the floodgates – he’d been unable to stop feeling those feelings. Ronan now lived in fear that one word too much would give him away, reveal his innermost desires, gushing out of him like a volcanic eruption. Adam probably knew, anyway. He was clever like that. Ronan thought he knew, at least – there was something different, weighted, in the looks he sometimes cast Ronan’s way – but if he did, he hadn’t said anything about it, whether to acknowledge Ronan’s feelings or reject them.

Ronan could tell him. But he didn’t know what it would do to their friendship. And it turned out, now that he was no longer consumed with jealousy over Gansey or trying hard to choke down his own shameful, fearful feelings, he quite enjoyed being Adam’s friend. He didn’t want to ruin it all on a chance. So he kept quiet; he hoped and waited and watched (literally – he looked at Adam quite a bit, more than before, probably more than was wise).

Which would be far, far easier to do without a certain feathered traitor.

Because as Ronan’s luck would have it, Chainsaw fucking loved Adam Parrish.

Right now, for instance, she was perched on Adam’s shoulder with a startling gentleness, one she didn’t even display for her own creator, if Ronan’s constantly scratched shoulders were anything to go by. Well. He supposed wearing tank tops didn’t help, but still. You could just see Chainsaw holding her body primly so she wouldn’t weigh down Adam too much. Damned ass-kissing bird.

Right now, she was staring adoringly at Adam as he tried to eat a truly pathetically thin peanut butter sandwich without jostling her too much. Ronan could tell because he was also staring from across the cramped St. Agnes attic (no, not adoringly, fuck you very much).

…Okay, maybe a little adoringly.

Chainsaw hopped down from Adam’s shoulder to land on his forearm. She cocked her head imploringly, black eyes fixed on the sandwich. “Kreker?” she asked shamelessly. Ronan could have smacked her - or himself. He hadn’t spent hours trying to teach her to speak just so she could try and steal Parrish’s sad excuse for a dinner.

“No, not a cracker,” Adam replied, seriously, as if he was holding a conversation with an actual person. He paused for a moment, as if he was looking for a term that a corvid could replicate more easily than peanut butter sandwich.

“Snack,” he landed on eventually, waving the sandwich a little as Chainsaw followed it avidly. “It’s a snack.”

Chainsaw flapped her wings once, then cocked her head to the opposite side. “Snack,” she barked.

Well, Ronan thought. I’ll be fucked.

“Clever girl!” Adam praised, kind of in the same tone he used whenever Gansey demonstrated that he’d retained a fact about car engines. He tore off a corner of his sandwich – with some difficulty, since he still had a very hefty raven pinning his arm down – and offered it to Chainsaw, who gobbled it up greedily.

“Hey, shitbird! That’s not yours. Leave Parrish’s sandwich alone,” Ronan called out across the room. Leave Parrish alone, he wanted to add. Stop acting like all you want is to be near him. This was a dangerous game to play. Adam knew Chainsaw was dreamt. He knew about how the night horrors, his deadlier-looking dream creatures, only ever wanted what Ronan wanted. He knew Ronan looked at him more than a friend should. He was observant, and he was smart. It was only a matter of time before he connected the dots. If he hasn’t already, Ronan thought with some unease, glaring at Chainsaw as he nervously bit on the leather bands at his wrist. Seriously, just stop.

Chainsaw blatantly ignored him.

“It’s alright,” Adam said, looking back at Chainsaw. Which meant he had been looking at Ronan just now. Possibly. Maybe. “I don’t mind,” he added, tearing off another piece of bread and feeding it to the raven. There was a small smile playing about his lips, amused and almost fond – like he was enjoying Chainsaw’s proximity and attention, even if it was coming at the expense of his food.

Chainsaw chirped happily – since when did ravens chirp, anyway?! – and flapped herself back up to Adam’s shoulder, hopping closer to his head this time. Most people would be a little nervous having a huge-ass bird with an extremely sharp beak that close to their face, but Adam only held himself still, waiting, his head tilted a little to the side. Chainsaw took that opportunity to nestle into the crook of his neck and puff up contentedly.

Oh my God, are you fucking kidding me, Ronan thought furiously. He thought he could feel a blush creeping up his own neck.

He wanted badly to call Chainsaw back – assuming she would even obey – but he couldn’t bring himself to do it when Adam looked so genuinely pleased, like any and all affectionate physical contact was surprising and delightful.

“Atom.”

There was a moment of silence in the room.

“Did she just say my name?”, Adam asked.

“Not sure,” Ronan lied, studiously staring at the raven – glaring at the raven – and not Adam.

“Yeah, she did. She said ‘Adam’.”

Ronan made an ‘eh’ face. “I think it was more like ‘atom’.”

Adam shot him an unimpressed look. “I doubt your raven is interested in molecular science.” He carefully put down his sandwich and reached up to gently pet Chainsaw, using one long index finger to stroke down the soft feathers around her beak. “Even though she is very clever. Good girl!”

“Atom!” Chainsaw crowed again. The word wasn’t any clearer but the way she rubbed her head into Adam’s jaw made the meaning very apparent.

Adam looked at Ronan with a little triumphant smirk. Ronan rolled his eyes.

“Whatever, Parrish. Here, you little bastard. Let Parrish finish his food.”

Chainsaw flapped her wings in discontent. “Atom snack?” she asked balefully.

“No,” Ronan said firmly. “Enough ‘snack’ for you.”

Even as he was still speaking, Adam replied, to Chainsaw, “Yes, Adam is gonna eat a snack. Clever girl. Good bird. Are you gonna let me finish it?”

Chainsaw barked once at him, but not unkindly, before flying the short distance over to Ronan’s outstretched arm.

Ronan glared at her for a few moments, then turned his glare on Adam.

“You’re undermining my parenting,” he accused.

“Well she has to learn manners somewhere,” Adam replied around a mouthful of sandwich.

“Hilarious,” Ronan muttered, stroking Chainsaw’s head, absently tracing the same path Adam’s finger had. She tucked her head in contentedly, as if allowing him to pet her was a conciliatory gesture on her part. She was still staring at Adam as he wolfed down the sandwich.

Well, fuck. This was going to be a problem.

#trc #pynch #ronan lynch #adam parrish #chainsaw #my writing #answer #sonboyadam #fluff #mp #took me a while to write this but i loved it!!!! i love chainsaw #yes i used THAT poe reference and what of it

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doctorbrightside · 3 years

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I’m depressed, so here are my Minecraft pets, their names, and my scheme to mess with my super cutesy friend. This is a very long post, but it’s very entertaining, at least to me.

This is a tale of sibling rivalry. We aren’t even siblings, but I’ve known her most of my life and she’s the closest thing to a sibling I’ll ever have. We started a Minecraft world together and I was going to take every opportunity to do something stupid to get out my impulsiveness. I always kept a bell in my hot bar already, and I was ready to cause some chaos.

When we first spawned, we wandered for forever, looking for a village to renovate. That’s when I found Beethocks. First born, most beloved. A little black and white cat I found while adventuring that I brought home. I asked my best friend what I should name him, because I didn’t know if a basic name like Socks wouldn’t do him justice or if a strange name like Beethoven would be pretentious. She said “do something in the middle,” which is a statement she will forever regret. Beethoven+Socks= Beethocks. This started my descent into “menace to society” status in our world.

I thought I lost Beethocks for a little bit, so I started the trip for another cat. It turns out, I had just sat him down and forgot where, but we won’t bring up my incompetence. When I got one, I named him Throckmorton, after my cousin, the skateboarder. She was not happy with this, and I vowed to make it so much worse.

Somewhere in the middle here, my friend got another cat, because the cat she got at the beginning went missing. She still had one, Honey, and now had another. She ended up naming her Bread, as in Bread and Honey, but I needed to counteract her cute names.

Things start to come together around this point. I ventured off into the spruce forest to look for a pack of foxes so I can have my own. I got one and brought him back home, planning on pissing her off as much as I can without her blocking me through every form of communication I have with her. I arrived back at my stupid little goth house and tied him up outside.

I think it’s important to mention that as I’m writing this, I got a message from her. My job as an annoying little bastard is never done.

I got a name tag and went to the anvil, barely holding in cackles, head full of pure malice toward Minecraft God. I was going to make things so, so much worse. I named him, my son, my child, my beloved, darling fox boy, Stainless Steel Fridge 145A7P9. I often refer to him formally with his full name, including numbers. Not only is he named after a state-of-the-art appliance, he also has a model number. How fancy and elegant is that, dear reader?

She did not think so. She regularly complains about it, but I know she would never do anything. This is the same person who immediately starts gardens in Minecraft because she can’t bear to watch the animals run when you hit them. This post may send her over the edge, though, and in that case, I’m a little sorry, but not really. I have tried to anger her as much as I have with Stainless Steel Fridge 145A7P9, but I have never again caused that level of a visceral hatred. He is the bane of her existence, so of course I had to get him siblings.

As I stated prior, I live somewhat close to a spruce forest. I wanted a dog. I looked for forever, and finally, I spawned one because I got tired of looking.

Animals with the wrong animal names will never not be hilarious. My cat in real life is named Toad, and I love him very much. So with my newly-spawned dog, I was going to entertain myself and come up with the farthest animal from a dog— an ostrich.

But that’s not enough. That wouldn’t make God turn upon his creation and feel regret for what He brought onto our mortal plane.

I’m queer and mentally ill, so of course I had an MCU phase. I still compulsively collect comic books to fill the void in my soul, but that’s beside the point.

The names of villains in the MCU are all works of pure genius, no matter how minor the character. For example, Tazorface, Abomination, and Ronan the Accuser. Notice the cool and threatening title tacked onto the end. This was inspiring.

My new son was named Ostrich the Destroyer, and I love him very much. The name didn’t evoke pure rage in her, so I decided a double whammy was the best thing I could do. I still had wolf spawn eggs in my hot bar.

I watch Supernatural. Yes, I’m very ashamed, but it’s a guilty pleasure. The misogyny and bad writing truly does entertain me to no end. But, it has been the source of many bad ideas and great comedic moments for me. The Dr. Sexy parody show is a work of art. What’s funnier than someone with a doctorate having a questionable last name?

And with that in mind, Dr. Piss PhD was born. She’s a wonderful dog, and she’s very proud of both her doctorate and PhD. She may have only been alive a few seconds, but trust me, she’s educated. By now, my friend had been desensitized, but she was still disappointed in me. Mission accomplished.

Thus, my expedition into being an annoying sibling and menace to society has been concluded indefinitely. I will conduct similar studies in the future of the collective tolerance of my friends. Thank you for reading.

#minecraft #anecdote #I love being a menace to society #scheme

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aeirithgainsborough · 5 years

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very Important adam/ronan things to take away from the cdth sampler:

“like the other lynch brothers, he was a regular churchgoer, but most people assumed he played for the other team.” i am SCREAMING. top tier gay joke. well timed.

everyone: ronan’s eyes aren’t pretty. adam: mhmm e y e l a s h e s

much to say about the revelation that ronan is partly at the barns to keep his dreams hidden and in check, and how much he relates an inability to change and be like everyone else to having to stay there. almost like he’s stuck huh! i’ve been saying!!

of note that words used to describe ronan’s existence are BORED and MALINGERED.

fingers crossed he finds some balance between his dreams and his wants/needs that allows him to leave the barns and grow but after the Great Crab Disaster I’M WORRIED.

fire imagery EVERYWHERE. i’m WORRIED again.

“there are stains that spread faster than you drive. if you drive, it’ll take fourteen years to get there. seventeen. forty. one hundred. we’ll be driving to your funeral by the end.” good to know ronan is still the most DRAMATIC boy in the whole of virginia. absolutely no chill.

dont like the possible foreshadowing of that driving to your funeral by the end, though. must leave lynches alone!

“it’s very safe” asjkajjka DECLAN PLEASE

“ronan kicked one of the volvo’s tires” asjkajjka RONAN PLEASE.

ronan trying to act nonchalant by cramming chocolate covered peanuts into his mouth and choking a little is Peak Disaster Gay.

matthew’s music must be awful if ronan and declan are in agreement over it, must have playlist.

ronan who lives to pretend he doesn’t care wondering if his brothers didn’t say anything about his moving because it didn’t make a difference to them is huhhh. don’t like it, take it away pls.

i’m sorry, ENTIRELY WRAPPED UP IN! ENTIRELY!

entirely

wrapped

shut up!!!! shut upppppp!

“is there any version of you that could come with me to cambridge?” tbh nothing would have readied me for this. adam i-can-do-everything-alone asking ronan if he could go with him. so much growth, too much pride, nowhere to put it, send help.

the fact that ronan doesn’t stay in cambridge when he visits adam because of plausible deniability, that if he doesn’t try there’s no evidence he can’t make it there. rip.

ronan! missed! him! like! a! lung!

dramatic again, but entirely relatable bc damn, same ronan, same.

a) ronan thinking about how his heartbeat is the same as everyone else’s so he wasn’t that different and b) JUST LIKE ADAM’S HEART WHEN HIS HEAD WAS RESTING ON HIS HEAD = much too much to think about. need to lie down for a bit.

he could move to follow the guy he loved!! we all knew it was love, we’ve always known it was love, but! the words. the words!!!!! brb sobbing.

i have only had jordan for a day and a half but if anything happened to her i would kill everyone in this room and then myself. 11/10 would marry.

art forgery plot confirmed!

THIS WAS HOW IT HAD BEGUN

bitch fkajdkajksja GIVE ME A WARNING.

still can’t compose myself RE the info that ronan saw adam and immediately sent a desperate prayer up to god

will the word please ever be the same again? definitely not!

adam’s arms adam’s hands his lovely! boyish! hands!

the description of his expressions with all its contradictions and multitudes is just my favourite thing ever. it encapsulates everything i love about adam fucking parrish.

and the fact that ronan instantly recognised all those multitudes in him. there was always a level of understanding ronan had for adam throughout trc that no one else did and this tells us he had that before he even met him, he just... recognised something in him i just... ;______;

please

ronan knowing all the harvard stats because he was the person adam could crow to, how he takes on that adam that is still full of contradictions and multitudes, how he finds it hard but he absorbs all the facts and all of adam’s anxieties, even in the face of his own anxieties about adam leaving and falling in love with the shining, educated people that ronan thinks are better than him. that absolute, unwavering support 😭😭😭

tbh there’s a whole ass lot to unpack in this section so imma try and do it briefly (she says!)

ronan lynch is a romantic cdth confirmed:

he could have texted adam but he liked the soft surprise of it

over the past few days ronan had played his reunion with adam over in his head MANY TIMES

adam i love you but that outfit sounds awful. you are a student, it’s a friday night, put some sweats on and stuff some cheetos in your mouth.

the sweet nervousness of their reunion, how they walk past each other and both seem so uncertain. they’re a year into dating and the still get nervous and unsure after a few weeks apart and it’s CUTE and definitely speaks to their excitement/anticipation levels.

THE WATCH. big time softness.

they hugged hard ;_____;

im just so relieved that they’re allowed to touch each other and be intimate and aren’t consigned to the ‘boys in love aren’t like that boring boring’ corner.

the way ronan thinks about how adam fits as he remembered. huh. you’re really gonna do this to me.

his hand still pressed against the back of ronan’s skull the way it ALWAYS did when they hugged.

you smell like home. you smell like home!!!!!! brb ive gone absolutely fucking feral.

i both want to play repo because it sounds fun and don’t want to because it sounds complicated and i fucking hate instructions. much confusion.

adam pressing his shoe hard against ronan’s and then his leg and then breathing in ronan’s ear I AM HOWLING. ronan’s nerve endings being made a marvel of I AM SOBBING. it’s very important that m/m ships are afforded the same level of explicit attraction as m/f (and i don’t mean explicit as in nsfw, i mean as in obvious)

no offence because i love them but all of adam’s friends sound Extra™

“to the outside eye, ronan lynch was a loser” pls ronan, you are giving me an ulcer.

scary spice i asjkjdkjskdjak

queer crying club! i stan!!

also adam saying in the epilogue of trk that he wanted to save all the adam’s hidden in plain view and then going to college and scooping up all the criers and giving them something to do is far too much to handle.

don’t think about that and the time he thought about how he used to spend his nights crying on the trailer steps and wondering why he bothered until gansey came along and offered him friendship. dont think about how he’s essentially paying that forward DON’T THINK ABOUT IT.

hand holding, arms around each other, hip to hip walking, can’t wait anymore kissing, I MISSED YOU. love that for me!

but also the fact that adam reaches down for ronan’s hand and its so natural. ronan’s hand is there so he just. takes it.

hearing ronan’s thoughts on what happened with robert at last is A Lot. the way it’s still happening, always happening, kept fresh and savage shows how affected ronan was by it all and still is and i think its so important that he’s not just. angry and hot headed. there’s more to it than that. its painful, it makes him feel sick, its unending and it really speaks to how much adam means to him.

adam thinks he has no one BITCH YOU’VE GOT ALL OF US.

and ronan.

but. how he feels like he has nothing still. the way his voice hitches on ‘because’ because it’s all still so painful. i wanna wrap him up. i wanna take everything that hurts away. i wanna tell him he’s so loved. guess i’ll just have to sit back and watch him work his way through it all I GUESS. no but i am looking forward to his growth in this trilogy, especially considering how much he’s grown already. adam parrish invented character growth lets 👏 be 👏 real 👏

it had never been a fight between them/it was a fight between adam and himself, between adam and the world/for ronan it was a fight between truth and compromise, between the black and white he saw and the reality everyone else experienced. i LOVE this. it so well encapsulates them. and it’s so important that they can realise their differing world views and their complexities and meet in the middle somewhere.

“ronan put his lips on adam’s deaf ear, and he hated adam’s father” FUCK ME UP. my absolute favourite bit 103930%. absolute incoherent mess over here. not! okay! see other post for more coherency because i only had it for 5.7 minutes.

frowning, guarded, crumpled adam who i’ll literally. never be over in all of my life. 38983/10 will love him until the end of time.

i want it too much. !!!!!! going feral again over here. WHAT DO YOU WANT ADAM? I WANT IT TOO MUCH. definitely will never shut up about this.

scared adam is going to be a visionary so pretending chapter 6 doesn’t exist.

LINDENMERE ;________;

i love it already

i CANNOT believe that ronan is being dream invaded and challenged and he’s over here like hmm nice bike ELEGANT and ROUGH and READY like ADAM asjkasj please ronan you are so embarrassing!!

also. ronan thinks adam is elegant and rough and ready so! there’s that!

i literally. cannot. cope with the HILARITY of chapter 8. the whole thing is a complete and utter DISASTER. it’s absolutely gone off in adam’s room after all his work at constructing a well put together boy. ronan comes for a night and everything goes BONKERS. amazing.

(really worried about what this means RE ronan being able to exit the barns and grow and change and not be bored and not feel like a loser so we’re focusing on the hilarious disaster of it all.)

p.s. adam sleeping slotted between ronan and the wall OKAY. THIS IS FINE!

p.p.s. adam’s bed hair is WILD.

p.p.p.s i have missed adam and ronan so so so so so much and im an emotional fucking wreck

#call down the hawk #ronan lynch #adam parrish #pynch #dreamer trilogy #cdth spoilers #long post #sorry so much to say we were so well fed so many thoughts #;_____;#lou.txt

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oopssasha · 4 years

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Dear Sasha,

I know you said you felt dumb for typing out all the plot bunny from that playlist. But you have to know that you made my days for weeks. Honestly, I wasn’t planning on luring you onto the shipping train. You got there all on your own without even realizing it and it’s both hilarious and so seriously incredibly adorably you. I have no clue how to put the amount of affection I have for you into letters.

I love how you couldn’t help yourself and had to ask how the Larry Stylinson thing came to be. Just remember this before you read any further: Curiosity killed the cat. I hope you subscribe to the idea that satisfaction brought it back, otherwise this is going to leave you dead. You asked about it the last time we talked. So here’s my thoughts on what could have happened if the hypothesis that HS and LT were/are in an actual relationship is true. Keep in mind that I have no clue what actually happened. I’m just a song nerd, investing way too much in musical inspirations.

First of all, let me just get this out of the way. I love Taylor Swift as an incredible songwriter that she is and she was the one who got me to notice 1D because she was dating Harry Styles that one time. Her song, ‘Style’ screamed PR stunt to me like nothing else. Actually, her whole 1989 album felt like a middle finger to incompetent PR managers everywhere. ‘Blank Space’ was the epitome of “I can manage my public persona better than you ever could.” ‘New Romantics’ was a love letter to fans filled with irony about high profile public life. How it sucks and makes everything possible at the same time.

Oh my god. I’m sorry I went off the rail. I just love her and her music. Please forgive my ramblings. Again.

Anyway, back to Larry Stylinson. Taylor mentioned how ‘Out of the Woods’ was inspired by a relationship she was in. And the biggest feeling in that whole relationship was anxiety. Funnily enough, ‘Out of the Woods’ makes the most sense to me if Taylor was in a PR relationship with HS, being fully aware that HS and LT were together, and wrote the whole song from imagining LT’s perspective. Taylor put herself in somebody else’s shoes in a song all the time. The most sincerely heartbreaking one to date for me is ‘Ronan’ and I cannot tell you how hard I cried for that song. ‘You were my best four years,’ got me bawling my eyes out. Every. Single. Time.

Here’s my line by line lyrics interpretation for ‘Out of the Woods’ on the assumption that Taylor wrote it from LT’s perspective.

>Looking at it now, it all seems so simple.

[HS was in a PR relationship to stop the gay rumors and hype up 1D world tour. Taylor was in it to turn her image into ‘good girl gone bad’ without having to go full on Miley Cyrus’s ‘Wrecking Ball’ and hype up her own world tour. It was a mutually beneficial arrangement. Simple but effective.]

>We were lying on your couch. I remember.

[LT once said, ‘Nobody knows where we live’ but the public narrative at the time said HS and LT no longer lived together. Hence, your couch, not ours.]

>You took a Polaroid of us, then discovered the rest of the world was black and white.

[Introducing artsy black and white Polaroid aesthetic to set the stage.]

>But we were in screaming color

[Obvious rainbow reference became painfully obvious.]

>And I remember thinking…

[The following repetitive chorus is so claustrophobic. It plays out as if it was a constant cloud hanging over LT’s head at all times. Like, will people leave us alone now that they no longer think we’re together? Are highly publicized heterosexual relationships enough to keep the scrutiny away? Can we just be together since we’re sworn to the secrecy now? We’re okay, right? We have to be. But are we really?]

>>>

Are we out of the woods yet?

Are we out of the woods?

Are we in the clear yet?

In the clear yet? Good

Are we out of the woods yet?

Are we out of the woods?

Are we in the clear yet?

In the clear yet? Good

Are we out of the woods?

>>>

>Looking at it now, last December we were built to fall apart then fall back together.

[Seeing each other in a PR relationship with someone else hurt further than just simple jealousy. It’s also a reminder that their relationship is not meant to exist, let alone to last.]

>>>

Your necklace hanging from my neck

The night we couldn't quite forget

When we decided (we decided)

To move the furniture so we could dance

Baby, like we stood a chance

Two paper airplanes flying, flying, flying

>>>

[This is where either my imagination ran away with me or Taylor is an actual Queen of Reference. I think it make sense that two paper airplanes here are a combination of a retrospective reference to HS’s necklace and an acknowledgment of LT’s paper airplane tattoo. In ‘Style’ MV at 00:13, HS’s paper airplane necklace, one Taylor wore publicly before, shows up. At her lucky number of seconds, Taylor is holding it like she’s praying, implying her best wishes for the relationship that the paper airplane represented. Throughout the music video, all the broken mirrors and jaded reflections alluded to a recognition of a kindred spirit. Media portrayals of their identities are so distorted to the point where the relationship people see is just a theatrical show for entertainment. I mean, ‘Style’ is almost 4 minutes long and, just 40 seconds in, the lyrics transition to ‘Fade into view’. If this doesn’t scream cinematic, I don’t know what else does. When Taylor flippantly said she could’ve named ‘Style’ as ‘I’m not even sorry’ and called it a day, I think she meant how she twisted the narrative in her favor and the media bought into it so much so that they’re chasing their own tails. Which is a reference I just made to ‘I Know Places’. What can I say? I’m a slave to my queen.]

>And I remember thinkin'

[Then the chorus repeats here. So I’m not going to repeat the interpretation.]

>Remember when you hit the brakes too soon?

>Twenty stitches in the hospital room

>When you started cryin', baby, I did, too

[If your loved one got hurt when they’re away on a job, would you cry when you heard the news? Especially when there’s nothing you could do to help? Then consider this. If Taylor was there to witness the conversation between two heartbroken boys, wouldn’t she decide right then and there to protect them against the world? She talked about the incident once before and how she kept its details on the downlow by looking at people involved dead in the eyes and straight up asking for decency. That’s such a mama bear thing to do, if you ask me.]

>But when the sun came up, I was lookin' at you

[The sunrise usually represents hope. I don’t see why this would be any different. Isn’t nice to know that there’s one more person in your corner?]

>Remember when we couldn't take the heat

>I walked out and said, "I'm settin' you free"

>But the monsters turned out to be just trees.

>And when the sun came up, you were lookin' at me

[This is the biggest reach ever. But I think this is when things had gotten so bad for HS and LT. That if they were together, this was probably their first potential breakup. But then HS got his ship tattoo. As a reminder that no matter where he is, he’s homeward bound. And then LT proceeded to get the compass pointing toward home tattooed on his arm. Taylor was there with HS because she’s a character in the PR narrative, just like a tree in the woods. For her, the show must go on. But she’s not a monster so as soon as the PR stunt was done, she booked it out of there. Her ‘I Know Places’ is almost a promise to not out HS & LT even if their PR relationship went down the drain in public. 1D just broke into North America which was sadly rather homophobic half the time, and, well, “Loose lips sink ships all the damn time. Not this time.”]

I need to go to sleep. I can’t believe I just wrote an essay about one hypothetical angle of a relationship that isn’t from a lit class required reading. If you’re dumb, I’m dumber. It’s 4 AM here and I have work in the morning.

Love you, but don’t call me tonight. I need to catch more zzzZzz.

Delaney

#larry stylinson #taylor swift #brain dump #why am i like this #too active imaginaion #out of the woods #lyrics interpretation #music video interpretation #style #haylor #larry

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emmerrr · 5 years

Text

let’s try this again shall we? also that should say ‘single level’ not single reference, i had fixed that typo before i posted and lost the original but never mind

It’s a while before Ronan notices, to be honest.

Socks just aren’t something he pays that much attention to; his own, or anyone else’s. They’re just...there. He doesn’t even really have a specific sock drawer. It’s more of a mixed bag drawer, full of sweatpants, PJs, boxers, and socks. His only prerequisite when reaching for socks in the morning is that there’s two of them. Whether or not they match is irrelevant.

So when Adam, home for the summer, mentions that he thinks some of his socks are going missing, Ronan doesn’t think too much about it.

“You sure you didn’t just leave them in the drier?”

“Pretty sure. I checked, and then I double-checked.”

“Oh well, I’m sure they’ll turn up,” Ronan says, then drags Adam’s attention back to more important things, like making out on the sofa for hours.

A couple of weeks later, Adam brings it up again, and Ronan tries to suggest other explanations.

“Maybe you accidentally left a bunch of socks at college?”

“Not a chance. They’re getting washed and dried as pairs, but when I come to empty the machine, a sock from each pair has gone, every single time. I’m gonna run out at this rate, I’ll have to get more.”

“You can always wear mine, Parrish, I don’t care. Or I’ll dream you up some new ones, easy-peasy.”

Adam frowns. “Yeah, I guess. It’s just...weird. It’s only my socks. I don’t get it.”

Strange as it is, Ronan still thinks weirder things have happened to them, so again it doesn’t rank too high on his list of priorities. It’s just one of those things, an unexplainable story to laugh about in the future.

After one afternoon spent working in one of the barns outside, Ronan returns to the house in the early evening and heads straight for the kitchen. Adam has returned from work, and is standing with his back to Ronan, leaning on the counter before him and watching the coffee machine do its thing.

He’s clearly been back a while, because he’s wearing sweats and a baggy t-shirt, and he’s had a shower and a nap if the way his hair’s sticking up on one side is anything to go by. But it’s his socks that immediately draw Ronan’s eye.

On Adam’s left foot is a sock in the colours of the bi pride flag, and on his right is a sock of Ronan’s, a red one patterned with multi-coloured dinosaurs. They were a Christmas gift from Matthew.

Adam doesn’t immediately realise Ronan’s there what with the coffee machine gurgling away, but as Ronan pads over he senses him a second before he reaches him, turning his face a half-inch and smiling.

Ronan tugs lightly at the sleep-stretched neck of Adam’s t-shirt and presses a lingering kiss to his bare shoulder, before wrapping his arms around him. “You look so fucking adorable,” he murmurs into Adam’s hearing ear.

Adam doesn’t verbally respond but he melts into Ronan a little, tilting his neck to allow access for Ronan to kiss a line down it the way he knows Adam likes.

“Nice socks,” he says, and it’s this that finally prompts Adam into actually speaking.

He turns around and lifts up his bi-stocking-ed foot. “See!” he exclaims. “The other one’s disappeared. I now don’t have any matching pairs of socks in this house and there is definitely a conspiracy at play.”

Ronan snorts. “Yeah, okay, this is getting pretty weird,” he allows.

Adam narrows his eyes. “This isn’t you, is it?”

“Huh?”

“The socks, Ronan. Is it you?”

“Adam, why the fuck would I steal your socks?”

“...Yeah, okay,” Adam says, visibly deflating. “I didn’t think you had a foot fetish as well as a hand kink.”

“Hey.” Ronan lightly pokes the tip of Adam’s nose. “Rude.”

“Sorry.” Adam sighs. “I just...I really, really don’t understand what could have happened to them.”

“Have you tried asking your tarot cards?”

“You’re hilarious, you know that?”

“I try.”

The rest of the summer passes in a wonderful blur, far too quickly but with as much fun and love as they can possibly squeeze into the days. No more of Adam’s socks go missing, but he refuses to replace any until he gets back to college, not wanting to risk them going walkabout at the Barns.

The day before he’s due to leave, he has one final shift at Boyd’s, an easy afternoon of oil changes for one last influx of cash. His bag is packed and waiting by the door in the hallway so it can be easily thrown into the car in the morning.

Ronan’s in the kitchen preparing a farewell feast worthy of champions when he hears the sound of something heavy being dragged across the floor coming from the hallway. He stops chopping potatoes and follows the sound, stepping through the doorway just in time to catch sight of Adam’s duffel bag being pulled up the stairs.

He rounds the corner so he’s standing at the bottom of the stairs and looks up to see that it’s Opal who’s making off with Adam’s bag. She freezes when she spots Ronan, drops the bag strap and darts the rest of the way upstairs to her room, slamming the door behind her.

Sighing, Ronan puts Adam’s bag back by the door and then follows Opal up the stairs.

He knocks on her door. “Opal?” No response. “I’m coming in, okay?”

He hesitates just in case she decides she doesn’t want him there, but when there’s still no reply he opens the door and scans the room.

He doesn’t immediately see her and feels a brief flare of panic that she might have escaped out the window (an alarming prospect as they’re on the second floor), but then he spots her sitting in the corner, facing the wall and covering her face with her hands.

She looks like she’s put herself in a time-out. Or that she’s counting for a game of hide-and-seek.

Ronan sits on the edge of her bed. “Opal. Look at me.”

At length, she lowers her hands and turns, pinning him with those big eyes, wide and unblinking.

“Why were you trying to hide Adam’s bag?”

“Because he can’t leave if he can’t find it,” she says slowly, as if she thinks he’s being very dim-witted on purpose.

“But he’s gotta go back to college. You know that.”

She shakes her head adamantly. “He went to college last year.”

“Right, but we talked about this, remember? It’s four years. And he’s already done one now.”

“Three more,” she says sadly.

“I know. It sounds long. But it’ll be like last year. He’ll go and then he’ll come back.”

She crosses her arms, petulant. “So long...”

“It feels like it sometimes, yeah, but that’s why we call him, and why we visit, and why he comes home as much as he can.”

Ronan understands separation anxiety all too well. It’s hard to comfort Opal when he feels very much the same. But he supposes one of them has to be the adult in this particular situation, and the task has fallen unenviably to him.

Opal finally deigns to come and sit next to him. “Won’t he miss us?” she asks quietly.

“Course he will, we’re fucking awesome,” Ronan says, and Opal finally quirks a smile. “But he’s worked really hard for this and he’s learning loads of cool stuff at college. So we can’t hide his stuff even though we’re gonna miss him, okay?”

Opal sighs. “Okay.” She hops down and reaches under her bed, pulling out a cardboard box. “Do you think he’ll need these as well?”

Ronan peers inside to see that the box is full of socks. Adam��s socks, to be exact. Mystery solved.

He bursts out laughing, and it’s a while before he gets his breath back to speak. “Did you think Adam wouldn’t be able to go back if none of his socks matched?”

“What else is the point of matching socks?” she asks, genuinely curious, and this sets Ronan off again.

“Ohhh, brat,” he says, wrapping an arm around her. “Don’t ever change.”

Adam is both pleased and confused when he gets home and is presented with his missing socks.

“Where did you find them?”

“Uhhh...” Ronan stalls, looking to Opal, unsure of how much she wants him to say, or if she even cares at all.

Adam notices the exchange and smiles at her. “Was it you who found them?”

Opal nods slowly. “They were...out...side,” she says unconvincingly. “I think Chainsaw took them.” Then she nods emphatically, happy with this excuse considering Chainsaw won’t be able to defend her own honour. “It was Chainsaw.”

Ronan supposes that just because he doesn’t lie, doesn’t mean Opal’s incapable. Adam smiles again, and there’s something knowing and wistful in it. He can likely now guess that Opal’s the true culprit, but he won’t call her out on it. He’s good like that.

“Well thank you,” he says, straightening Opal’s skull-cap. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Opal beams and kisses the back of his hand before scampering off outside to torment the local wildlife or whatever else she does for fun.

Adam steps into Ronan’s orbit and kisses him, slow and gentle. “I don’t know what I’d do without you either,” he murmurs.

Ronan grins at that. “I think you should only wear odd socks from here on out.”

“Y’know what, it’s grown on me.”

#the raven cycle #pynch #tumblr prompts #trc fic #trc

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jessiewre · 4 years

Text

Day 59

Tues 3rd Mar

🏔Moshi to Arusha 🚍

It was time for us to leave Moshi and move onto Arusha, a city 2 hours away renowned as the starting point for all the big safari parks.

I went up early for brekkie on the rooftop and this time, we had bananas but there appeared to be no coffee. I asked the woman and she confirmed it and was just like ‘Sorry, no coffee’.

As I write this, I have the overwhelming feeling that it definitely feels like the right time to step back from the blog. First, I’m telling you about there being no bananas at breakfast. Jesus. Then the next day there is no coffee. I’m thinking WOW. This is boring isn’t it. But then again, some of you may be so bored reading about Coronaviru that this is a welcome break.

Well, it did jazz up a bit and get exciting, cos I looked up and coffee had appeared. JUST LIKE THAT. Thats right! One minute it was there, then the next, Poof! Like magic! God knows how long it had been there, the woman didn’t feel the need to mention it to me despite knowing I wanted coffee. Absolute JOKE.

We spent the morning packing our bags and debating what our plan should be, while Phil huffed and puffed, flipping between angryman and stresshead. He had definitely got out on the wrong side of the bed, but as the great Irish philosopher Ronan Keating once said, Life is a rollercoaster. Well, Phil was certainly riding that rollercoaster. He was hot and cold like a broken tap I tells ya.

Despite Phil’s multiple attempts to get one, not having a SIM card was irritating him a lot, especially considering we needed to ring various people about hotels and safaris. So after a bit more grumbling, he went off like a true moody hero to try Vodacom again. I ‘minded the bags’ and did some hotel research (ie. I had a nice long chat with Evie and then spoke to Luke & Bex about house viewings).

Despite the 10am check out time (its more a suggestion than a rule right?), I sat in our hotel room with the door open to imply I was leaving ‘any minute’ and positioned a towel hung on the bed pole, perfectly hiding my face from the doorway view to ensure I avoided eye contact with any hotel workers passing by 😏.

I thought about Phil, all alone in that annoying phone shop, and felt a pang of guilty. Or was it hunger? Hard to know. But either way, I sent him some WhatsApp messages to give the impression I was doing lots of excellent research (that should Cheer him up, I thought), and crossed my fingers that the hilarious GIFS I was sending would put him in an AMAZING mood. He loves a GIF does our Phil. After the pain of sim card buying, I knew it could go either way but at least he’d only get the messages once he’d eventually got a working sim so I had a chance...

Well, I soon saw the ticks ☑️ turn that beautiful shade of blue and nervously waited for a response.

THANKFULLY I got two of the best emoji’s I could have hoped for.

🕺🏻 🕺🏻

It was then I knew that Sweetbox were right back in the 90s - Everything’s Gona be Alright.

My overstaying-my-welcome plan worked for 2 whole hours and I made it to midday sat in the hotel room before I got a polite knock on the door to ask me to vacate.

‘Ohh I didn’t realise the time, of course I’ll leave straight away’.

Phil returned and strongly declared we should go to Milan’s Indian for a quick lunch before going to get the bus. Well, the awkward thing was, I didn’t want to eat curry for lunch (not a sentence I say often)...but then again, I also really didn’t want to risk messing with Phil’s mood...

I decided to try the softly, softly approach and lightly suggested we go to the Kilimanjaro coffee lounge.

Phil jerked his face round to me angrily and the atmosphere instantly went ice cold.

‘What is WRONG with Milans?? You loved the food there and its really close by!’.

I quietly explained again that although it was a lovely place, I simply didn’t want curry for lunch, and he obviously couldn’t argue with that. Such is life. But it definitely REALLY annoyed him and he stropped out of the hostel with his bags in search of a tuc tuc.

We both stood on the corner of the street in blasting heat waiting for a tuc tuc to appear and for some reason, there were NONE. Everytime we saw one and waved it down, it would go zooming past and we would see there were already people in the back. Phil was ready to burst with annoyance but as the sun began to nearly melt our heads, I finally waved one down.

We went to put our bags in and then got a shock as we realised there was already a woman in the back!

‘No problem no problem’ declared the driver as he saw the look on our faces, and he ushered at me to put my rucksack into the back. Well, that was harder than it looked.

‘Oh for Gods sake’ Phil said under his breath, but not so much that we all didn’t hear him and I started to attempt getting my bag in.

Phil watched on in disbelief and was like ‘This is ridiculous! Where are we meant to sit??’

Phil then tried to get his bag in while I tried to sit in the front with the driver, but the driver was like ‘Nah you go in back’, then the woman was sort of holding Phil’s massive rucksack and there was not really any room for us and Phil just lost his rag completely 😂

‘Right, forget it! Take the bags out Jess! I AM NOT GETTING THIS TUC TUC!’

I had a point like.

Thankfully, a nearby boda driver had a great loud whistle and managed to hail another tuc tuc down straightaway, just before Phil spontaneously combusted, and we went to Kili coffee lounge where there were too many witnesses for Phil to maintain his grumpy face for too long. PHEW.

I enjoyed a simple cheese tomato toastie with fries (opposite of a curry I’d say) and now that he’d calmed down, Phil told me about his morning visit to the phone shop. While he was stood in the phone shop, stressing out and getting super angry and wound up by the slow process, he went to look at his phone and clicked to unlock it. To his utter shock, on the screen was an image he’d NEVER seen before, and it was one of those ‘Inspirational Quote’ memes.

It said:

If you can’t handle stress

You can’t handle success

He stood in total amazement, starring at the screen, wondering how the powers that be had managed to target him in this way, how google was so onto him. How had they known he was MEGA stressed and how had they got this image onto his phone?!?! Maybe it was a message from GOD?!

WELL after further investigation (the back button), he discovered that it was the profile picture of the phone shop guys. He’d added the guys number as part of the sim registration process, then he’d accidentally clicked on this guys whatsapp profile pic without realising, then locked his phone 😂😂😂😂😂.

Anyway, back to the cafe, it had been 30 minutes of good vibes so naturally Phil started to dip again, this time stressing about getting a bus to Arusha. After all the bus journeys we’ve ever done, I have NO IDEA why this simple 2 hour journey was getting to him so much, but hey ho sometimes these things don’t make sense do they. He’s a complicated and simple fellow in equal measures.

We put on our bags and walked to Tahmeed buses to see if by chance they had one of their nice buses passing through anytime soon, so we could avoid the super basic local buses that stop every 5 minutes. Much to Phil’s joy, they said SURE there’s one departing in about 15 minutes and that was the first time that day that Phil reeally smiled, ya know like with all his teeth and his eyes. It was beautiful.

The bus arrived about 30 minutes later (not too bad by African standards!) and we took a seat, only to realise it was actually some guys seat who had just jumped off the bus for a drink - and he just happened to have a huge machete on his belt! He seemed fine with it though and sat somewhere else! The bus guys weirdly would not allow anyone to have their windows open, instead insisting that we have the AC on. I kept opening my window a bit anyway as the AC above my head was blocked and I needed the fresh air, but the bus man was getting really annoyed. The locals wanted their windows open too but the bus man was stomping round the bus shutting them all and shouting at people, while people shouted back at him. As people coughed and sneezed 🤧 as humans tend to do, I wondered how many germs were getting regurgitated back through the system during this time of hyper virus mania... 🦠

The woman next to me fell asleep on me for most of the journey then we arrived to Arusha town. As we’d read would happen, we were completely HOUNDED on arrival by men trying to sell us safaris. One guy pretended to work for the bus company while getting my bag to hand me, I was like Dude I can get my own bag.

They were all talking at once trying to give us business cards, one guy said another guy was a liar, another accused another of being a thief, and it was just chaos and frankly, harassment - so Phil told them all to Frig the Frig off and we walked the 6 minute walk to our hotel Raha Leo Inn.

We walked through the door feeling immediate relief to be away from the hassling streets, when suddenly the door opened behind us and the guy who’d pretended to be working for the bus company walked in and started to try and sell us a safari!I was like Hey I thought you said you worked for the bus company mate, and he was like ‘Yes yes, they are my friends, but I have safari’. What the hell does that even mean haha. He even pointed to a safari vehicle parked outside and said ‘Uh, this is my vehicle’.

Uh, I don’t think it is mate 😂

But in an attempt to make him go away, I took the card from him and said Thanks, I’ll be in touch if we need to, ba bye now, ba bye.

It was too late though, Phil was FAR too annoyed by it all and he went for it.

‘You have just FOLLOWED US here and now you come INSIDE the hotel to hassle us?? I don’t want your card! I will NOT be doing a safari with you, take you card and please leave’.

Incase the guy wasn’t clear, Phil shoved the card into his hand while he said it.

The guy was rather disgruntled at all this but left the hotel looking defeated. Phil puffed his chest out a bit and gave his chest some big fist blows in a gorilla like fashion.

About 5 minutes later, I watched a completely different man drive off in the safari vehicle the guy had been referring to...

The hotel was clean and pleasant enough, although the lack of a TOILET SEAT was a little strange 😂. Also we noticed a man walk into the hotel and straight up to the social area without being stopped by the staff, and he turned out to be another safari seller. Hmm. We made a mental note to keep an eye on our valuables and not leave them out anywhere...

I was back to normal and ready to eat curry by dinner time so we went to find the the LP recommended Hot Plate restaurant. Directly opposite it was a stall of crazy shirts and we couldn’t resist a quick look before we headed inside, immediately finding a sweet shirt that we had to buy for 20k tsh (about £6.50). The young lads running the stall were buzzing, though why there needed to be 4 of them working I’ll never know. Thats like 1 guy for every 2 shirts available. We did the crazy handshake to celebrate the purchase which they really lolled at.

Obviously then I washed my hands - while singing the chorus of 21 seconds by So Solid Crew.

Our dinner was soooo good - maybe the best masala fries so far, a delicious dosa, and loads of other lovely food - and we went to find a tuc tuc to get back, eventually finding one at the petrol station, and took our huge doggy bag of food with us.

On return, we found out one of the hotel staff had her phone taken that very day! We told them they really needed to invest in a lock on the front door so only staff and guests could enter. They agreed with us and so will probably do absolutely nothing about it.

After spending almost 11 hours of his time searching, Phil FINALLY found the official marathon snaps of himself and was (understandably of course) very excited to see them, so we had a good look through those for about an hour (there were 10 photos after all) before finally getting back to The Crown.

3rd

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swimmingwolf59 · 6 years

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I am He as You are He as You are Me

(A/N) Hey guys, sorry this took so long! My mental health took a turn for the worst yesterday so I didn’t get as much done as I wanted to, but I feel much better today and was able to crank this out for you all! I had a lot of fun writing it – body swapping is one of my absolute favorite tropes EVER!! I wanted to write more honestly, but it felt like it was already getting out of hand, and I wanted to focus on pynch since, you know, pynchweek xD Who knows though, maybe I’ll come back to this universe someday :P

Anyway, hope you enjoy and thanks for reading!! I know technically pynchweek is over soon, but I still have another two entries that’ll be coming your way hopefully soon!

P.S. Cabeswater is a prankster change my fucking mind

It all started when Gansey suggested they go camping.

Instead of wanting to camp in a national park of some kind like a normal person, Gansey wanted to camp in Cabeswater. His logic was that they always wanted to explore it and start trying to make a map, so why not spend a full two days there, submerged in the forest, learning its ways? At the time, everyone had been enthusiastic about the idea.

They might not have been if they’d known what was going to happen.

It started out fine. They spent the day wandering and mapping and getting lost in nature. At one point, Ronan found himself physically lost in nature with Adam; though they were the Greywaren and the Magician respectively, neither of them asked for Cabeswater to help guide them. There was a part of Ronan that enjoyed being lost in the woods with Adam, and it seemed like Adam might feel the same way.

They’d been skirting this…thing between them for some time now. Neither of them liked to mention it directly. They both knew it was happening, and they both played the game, but neither of them had tried to win it. Ronan no longer looked away when Adam caught him staring at him, but he didn’t do anything more either; he was afraid to, afraid that the teasing and smiles that Adam gave him would go away if he did.

But here, right now, in Cabeswater’s warm protection, it felt like anything could happen.

“Aha!” Adam exclaimed suddenly and hurried forward. Once he reached the tree, he slammed his palm on its trunk and turned to Ronan triumphantly. “See? I told you we’d eventually pass this tree more than five times.”

It was a strange tree, but that was what made it so wonderful: it was an oak tree, but somewhere along the way in its growth it had become twisted and convoluted until it grew every which way. One of the trunks had grown completely horizontal for a while before suddenly jarring upwards at a 45-degree angle and then straightening out again. The horizontal bit looked like it made a good bench to sit on, if one was willing to try and climb up to it.

Ronan had bet Adam they wouldn’t pass it more than five times on their lost adventures. The loser had to try and climb the tree.

“You just want to see me fall on my ass, don’t you Parrish?” Ronan scoffed but shirked off his shirt and began climbing the tree.

It was actually quite easy, considering how weird the angles were: there were ridges and cavities bored into the trunks by animals or insects, making perfect handholds for climbing. The only times Ronan got stuck was when the trunk turned in a really acute angle, which forced him to shimmy around to the other side of the trunk so he could climb more safely.

But he made it, and when he did he stood on the flat surface triumphantly. “Ha! Bet you can’t make it up here, Parrish!”

Adam was already at the base of the tree, his hands on the trunk and his eyes gleaming with challenge as he stared up at Ronan. “What do I get if I make it there?”

“…I’ll tell you my deepest, darkest secret,” Ronan said, because Adam looked gorgeous staring up at him like that in his natural forest element and it felt like anything could happen.

Adam hesitated for only a second before taking off his shirt and beginning to eagerly hoist himself up the tree. It wasn’t often that Ronan offered his secrets for such a cheap price, after all, and Adam was a sucker for bargains.

Ronan carelessly draped himself across the tree ledge as he watched Adam climb. This was a prize in itself, really – watching Adam’s muscles move with no clothes to block his imagination. He watched the sweat gleam off of his tan skin and imagined licking it off of him, imagined what it would taste like, imagined what kind of noise Adam would make as he did it, imagined how his breath would stutter under his tongue.

It was dangerous, letting himself think these thoughts when Adam was so close. There was no telling what he might do.

But then again, he knew Adam was an excellent climber. And he knew exactly what he was going to tell him when he made his way up here.

Adam didn’t make Ronan wait long. He dragged himself onto the ledge quicker than Ronan had, pushing Ronan’s legs aside to make room for himself to sit down. He was panting lightly and his skin gleamed even brighter under the light filtering in from the canopy now that he was closer to Ronan. And he smelled wonderful, too, like the crushed needles of a grand fir.

This was dangerous.

“Alright, Lynch,” Adam said when he caught his breath. “What’s the secret?”

He was looking at Ronan in a way that made it impossible to doubt how he felt. They’d been playing this game together all along, and yet neither of them had quite believed they were both playing the same game. Ronan believed it now; looking at Adam like this, so close to him, and smelling that citrusy scent, he could believe anything.

So he sat up, cupped Adam’s cheek in his hand, and kissed him.

When he pulled back, Adam had a small smile on his face. “Oh. That? That’s not a secret – I already knew about that.”

“Asshole,” Ronan growled through a laugh, but didn’t pull away when Adam leaned in to kiss him again.

Suddenly, the light disappeared. It was so abrupt that it made both of them jump and nearly fall backwards out of the tree. The stars started to break through the total darkness, much faster than they would normally, and eventually one burned so bright that it cast a dim light over Ronan and Adam.

Ronan straightened into a defensive posture. “Horror movie setting.”

“Romantic candlelight,” Adam corrected.

They stared at each other. And then they burst out laughing.

“Cabeswater, you little shit,” Ronan gasped. The trees shook around them and it felt like they were laughing, too.

“I feel like Cabeswater’s become more playful lately,” Adam said, leaning forward to kiss his way up Ronan’s jaw. He whispered into Ronan’s ear, “It really does take after you.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Ronan growled, a shiver slicing up his spine. He gingerly placed his hands on Adam’s chest, let his fingers splay out across his ribs. “But yeah, next thing we know it’s going to be playing practical jokes on us.”

“Oh God, I can’t even imagine what it’ll come up with,” Adam laughed, but they didn’t waste time on speculating.

Instead, they sat in that tree and kissed and kissed until they had utterly lost all track of time, not that time worked normally in Cabeswater anyway. They kissed until their lips were bruised and they had traced over almost every inch of their bodies with their fingers, touching and probing. In a way, they were doing their own kind of mapping; exploring and worshipping and finding out what touch and where made the other gasp.

And in the background, Cabeswater changed the ambience to fit their moods. It increased and decreased the light when it thought it was necessary, changed the colors around them, blew wind across their fevered skin when it felt like the heat was too much to bear. At one point it sounded like a song whistled through the trees, but Ronan couldn’t catch what song it was before Adam distracted him by biting down on his skin.

It was magical. It was perfect.

But eventually, they parted, knowing their friends would worry if they didn’t find their way back soon. Ronan could hardly breathe; he felt like he’d been underwater for hours.

“We should’ve done that months ago,” Adam said as they caught their breaths and carefully picked their way down from the tree.

Years, Ronan almost said, but he didn’t really want Adam to know just how long he’d been playing their game.

They put on their shirts and walked back to the campsite hand-in-hand, Cabeswater showing them the way now that they both wanted to head back. Ronan’s palm was entirely too sweaty—despite how long they’d spent making out, he was nervous about handholding of all things, Blue would never let him live it down if she found out—and he prayed that Adam couldn’t tell.

That night, they all roasted marshmallows and made s’mores, Ronan teaching Adam how to get it just right since he had never done anything like that before. Gansey told stories about Glendower and Henry told Korean horror stories and Blue talked about the endangered rainforests. Ronan made up stupidly hilarious stories about Declan and Adam made up hilariously stupid stories about Declan until they were all rolling around laughing.

But eventually everyone started to get tired, and they all retired to their tents. Gansey, Blue, and Henry were sharing a tent that was barely big enough to fit the three of them while Ronan and Adam had each brought their own. After the events of today, though, Ronan wondered if he really had to sleep alone.

Poking his head out, and watching Adam struggle to fix a shitty pole on his tent, he barked, “Your tent is actual garbage Parrish, just get the fuck in here.”

“It’s good enough,” Adam protested, like the stubborn asshole he was.

Ronan rolled his eyes. “I’ll make Cabeswater knock it down at night if you don’t get in here.”

Adam glared at him, but after a moment of a locked stare-down he must’ve realized what Ronan’s true reasons for wanting him in his tent were because he threw the poles onto the ground, stalked over to Ronan’s tent, and forced himself inside.

Ronan’s tent was humongous, so there was no reason to lay close to each other, but they pretended that wasn’t true and curled close together anyway. It was too hot to be in their sleeping bags so they slept on top of them, staring at each other in the faint light.

Adam moved first, tossing his leg up over Ronan’s.

It was more or less easy after that; they knocked limbs and shoved each other around until they settled into a comfortable, tangled position. Adam’s legs were hooked around Ronan’s knees and Ronan had his arm thrown around Adam’s waist and his face shoved into his neck. It was still too hot for this behavior, but they pretended that wasn’t true, either.

Instead, Ronan pressed closer to Adam.

This was how it should be.

II.

The next morning, Ronan woke up next to Gansey, not Adam.

Rearing back, he flailed, trying to wrench himself out of his sleeping bag. His body felt weird and disproportionate and he couldn’t figure out how he’d gotten into Gansey’s tent. And actually, why the hell was he in his sleeping bag?! It had been hot as hell when he’d gone to sleep!

But holy shit, had kissing Adam been a dream? Had he kissed Gansey in some fever-induced haze?!

In his panic, Ronan accidentally knocked Gansey in the knee with his foot, causing Gansey to sleepily blink his eyes open. “…Blue?”

…Blue?! He knew Gansey was blind without his glasses or contacts, but holy shit! Wait…Blue? Gansey almost never called Blue Blue.

“I’m not—!” Ronan shouted but stopped because that was not his voice. It had come out higher-pitched and…womanly.

Glancing down warily, things started to click into place: he was wearing some kind of weird nightgown that looked like it had started off its life as a sparkly blue bath curtain. His skin was dark and long hair drooped down into his face from where part of it was clipped up. The nails of the foot he’d kicked Gansey with were covered in neon yellow nail polish.

He was also about five feet tall.

…Oh fuck no.

“Blue, how did you get in my tent? Where’s Ronan?” Gansey asked, and Ronan suddenly realized with growing horror that Gansey wasn’t Gansey either. He had to be…

“…Parrish?” Ugh, he couldn’t get used to talking in Blue’s voice.

Gansey—no, Adam—scrunched his eyebrows together. “Why are you calling me—?”

And then it seemed to occur to him that something was off. He glanced down at himself, blanched, and glanced up at Ronan. “…What the fuck? Blue, I’m—”

“Yeah, I know, I am too. I’m not Sargent by the way,” Ronan growled.

Adam squinted at him. “Lynch?”

“Unfortunately.”

Adam squinted at him some more before he rolled onto his back and started hooting with laughter. It was unsettling watching Gansey’s body laugh so uproariously at someone else’s suffering.

“Shut the fuck up!” Ronan hissed and attempted to kick him. It felt like there was no power behind his tiny limbs. “You’re literally fucking Gansey right now.”

“Yeah, but—” Adam could barely speak through his laughter. “You’re Blue.”

Ronan growled and decided he’d had enough of this, so he threw himself out of the tent. As he stomped outside, he saw Adam climb out of Ronan’s tent. Except, it couldn’t really be Adam, because Adam was currently inside Gansey.

“Bluebird?” was the horrific thing that came out of Adam’s mouth.

Oh God it was Henry.

“…What in the world is going on…?” a familiar voice said as someone else climbed out behind Henry.

…Oh God that was his body climbing out of his tent over there.

Ronan didn’t know how to process any of this. It was unreal; it was somehow stranger than anything else they’d ever faced before. For a while he just stood there, stupefied, as he watched his body slowly approach him. “…Jane?”

“No, that’s Ronan,” Adam said as he finally joined everyone outside the tent. “I don’t know what the hell’s going on, but I think we should figure out who’s in who’s body to avoid any more confusion. I’m Adam.”

“And I’m Henry,” Adam’s body said.

“I’m Gansey, but…” Ronan’s body said as he thumbed at his lip. Ronan decided that he hated watching Gansey’s habits manifesting on his body. “I’m sorry, but am I Ronan right now?”

“Sucks, doesn’t it?” Ronan snapped at him.

Gansey shook out his legs. “I’m not used to being this tall.”

Ugh, Ronan was getting a headache watching his own body do stuff.

“Cabeswater, what the fuck?!” Ronan shouted at the sky, already done with this nonsense. “Change us back!”

Nothing happened.

“Cabeswater!” Gansey—no, Adam, fuck this was confusing—shouted. “Change us back!”

Again, nothing happened.

“What the shit?!” Ronan hissed.

“Maybe it’s not listening because we’re not in the bodies of the Greywaren or the Magician,” Adam speculated.

“But it did this to us – shouldn’t it be the only one not confused?”

“Perhaps it wasn’t purposeful,” Gansey said. Ronan did not like looking at his own body talking like an old person. It was just wrong. “Here, I’ll try – Cabeswater, uhh…”

Ronan had to acidly supply him with the Latin. When Gansey stumbled over the pronunciations, but more or less said it, however, Cabeswater still did nothing.

“…We should ask Fox Way about this,” Adam said eventually.

“Great,” Ronan grumbled.

Gansey looked over at him, amused. “You may have to live there for a while, Ronan, considering you’re Jane right now.”

Ronan reared back. “Oh fuck no—”

Just then, Henry, presumably Blue, crawled out of the tent and glanced around at all of them. She stared for a good minute before saying eloquently, “Well this is fucked.”

III.

Of course, the women at 300 Fox Way had known immediately what was happening.

Maura opened the door in a fit of hysterics. “I must say you kids certainly get yourselves into a lot of strange situations!”

“How can you laugh about this?” Blue demanded. She pointed at Ronan. “Ronan’s in my body!!”

Adam snorted. “You have to admit that’s really funny.”

“I don’t think it’s very funny,” Calla hissed, appearing out of nowhere and latching onto Ronan’s shoulder, her hand like a claw. “How dare you inhabit Blue’s precious body, snake.”

“Trust me, I don’t want to fucking be here either,” Ronan growled, attempting to shove her off. A horrible thought occurred to him suddenly and he turned to Blue. “Oh God, you’re not on your period are you?”

Calla smacked him in the back of the head as she withdrew her hand. Blue glared at him, though most of the heat of it was lost in translation to Henry’s face. “No, God, why would you even ask that?”

“I don’t want to fucking deal with that! I already have to deal with having…woman parts.” Ronan shuddered at the thought.

“Oh, poor you,” Blue snapped as she crossed her arms. “I hope my period does start when you’re in my body, just to spite you; then you’d know how awful it is.”

Ronan bared his teeth at her but, before he could say anything, Gansey stepped forward. It went against all laws of nature that Ronan’s body was attempting to mediate conflict. “Ms. Sargent, do you have any ideas on why this has happened or how we can fix it?”

“How many times have I told you to call me Maura – none of that ‘Ms. Sargent’ crap,” Maura snapped. Ronan shuddered as Gansey made his face look remorseful. Fuck Gansey was going to ruin his reputation.

Maura sipped her dubious tea concoction as she settled down on their ratty couch. She seemed entirely unphased considering the situation. “Honestly, I think Cabeswater is just having a little fun. It sees you guys clowning around all the time and wants to seem more like its human companions, so it’s playing around.”

“So Cabeswater’s pulling a prank on us,” Henry said.

Ronan pointed at Adam. “I fucking told you it would!”

“Is there a way we can ask it to stop?” Gansey asked.

“We already tried that, remember?” Adam said. “It didn’t respond to me or Ronan.”

“Just let it have its fun, I’m sure it’ll return you all to normal soon enough,” Maura said, smirking around her tea cup.

Ronan glared at her. “You’re fucking enjoying this, aren’t you?”

“I’m mainly looking forward to forcing you to do things as my daughter,” Maura cackled, a gleam of something sinister in her eyes.

Ronan got out of there as fucking fast as he could.

IV.

It turned out that the worst thing Maura made him do was go to school. She insisted he go to school because Blue would and it turned out that Mountainview Shitty High was way worse than Aglionby. Mainly because Gansey and Adam weren’t there, but also because Blue was so short that he couldn’t intimidate people as easily as usual so people kept trying to…talk to him. He even had to go to a guidance counseling meeting that made him want to kill himself. (Honestly, by storming out of there and getting nothing accomplished he was doing Blue a favor.)

The whole experience was horrific.

But at least after it was over, Adam came to walk home with him because Gansey would’ve done that for Blue.

“Parrish, thank God,” Ronan said as he saw him lurking on the sidewalk outside of Mountainshit. “This place is giving me hives.”

“You’ve been here for six hours,” Adam said, a smirk on his face. He was truly doing a poor job of imitating Gansey.

Ronan shot him a horrified look. “God, don’t remind me.”

Adam laughed before glancing around suddenly. It was only then that Ronan realized people were staring at them, leaning their heads together to gossip quietly. He stared at Adam. “Fuck, how do Dick and Sargent usually act in public?”

Adam did a weird little half-shrug. “I don’t know, should we kiss or something? They’re always all over each other now that Blue’s no longer cursed.”

Ronan scoffed and glanced down at the ground. “Man, I can’t kiss you when you look like Gansey… I know short girls with weird outfits are your type, but—”

“You’re never going to let that go, are you?” Adam sighed. “Here, we can just hold hands or whatever – that should be fine, right?”

Ronan swallowed. “Uh, yeah, I guess.”

Adam grabbed his hand and essentially started dragging him off down the sidewalk. And even though they’d just done this last night, it was weird because it was Gansey. Even though he knew Adam was currently occupying his body, it was disconcerting to glance over and see Gansey’s face instead of Adam’s.

Despite all that, though Ronan’s hand was still so fucking sweaty. How goddamn embarrassing.

“This is so fucking weird,” Ronan grumbled, kicking at stray pebbles along the side of the road. The one good thing about dressing like Blue was that she had some killer Doc Martins. “Did you know girls have to sit when they piss? Talk about inconvenient.”

Adam snorted. “Of course I knew that, Lynch, how did you not know that? Do you think everyone has a penis?”

“I wish everyone had a penis.”

Adam shoved him. “It is kind of weird becoming comfortable with someone else’s genitals, though…”

“Please don’t tell me you were admiring Dick’s dick in the bathroom.”

“I wasn’t!” Adam snarled, a blush on his face. “…Though that wouldn’t be the worst thing I’ve done to Gansey today…”

Ronan grinned, delighted and intrigued. “What the fuck did you do?”

-five hours earlier-

Adam thought that everyone must know something was off.

He couldn’t be a convincing Gansey. He had spent many nights agonizing and wishing he could be, but he couldn’t pull off the flawless politician’s smile or seeming genuinely interested when schmoozing with people. He was having trouble even pretending that he could do it. Just this morning, he’d lost his dignity because he’d had to dress himself in a hideously bright-colored polo underneath his uniform and put on those…boat shoes. When he’d walked out and Ronan had practically been rolling on the floor from his laughter, he’d sworn and flipped him off before stalking out, a decidedly non-Gansey action.

And his behavior hadn’t much improved once he got to school. Adam had had no idea really how many people Gansey knew and engaged in pleasant conversation with. It was exhausting. Every step he took someone was whooping at him or slapping a hand on his shoulder or asking him about something mundane. It was hard not to act like Adam Parrish—ignore them, flinch when they touched him—and it was even harder to act like Gansey—act interested, have something interesting to say back, know who the fuck these people even were and how Gansey knew them.

It was a disaster.

He at least took comfort from the fact that Gansey was doing no better of a job imitating Ronan. In fact, he was arguably doing worse – he was bad at permanently scowling, and more than once Adam had had to nudge him in the ribs because he’d been walking around with a goofy, utterly non-Ronan smile on his face. Every time he had to swear at someone, he stumbled on his words so much that it almost came out sounding polite. It was endlessly entertaining, and Adam almost hoped they stayed in each other’s bodies long enough just so he could show Ronan how bad of a job Gansey was doing.

He’d be mortified.

“This is incredibly difficult,” Gansey said to Adam as they walked to fourth period. (History, a class Ronan would never be caught dead in, but if Gansey was going to do anything with this opportunity he was going to make Ronan go to school.) He was thumbing his lip, which made Adam realize that maybe he should be doing that, too.

“I know what you mean. I don’t know how you talk to so many people,” Adam grumbled. “Who even are they all?”

Gansey smiled and shrugged. “Mainly people I know from old clubs.”

“You do too many things,” Adam said, and Gansey laughed.

“I feel that way sometimes too.”

“Hey, Lynch!” a disgusting voice sneered. Adam and Gansey looked up to see Kavinsky grinning at them down the hall. “Still following Richard III around like a dumb dog, huh?”

This time, Gansey had no trouble. He glared at Kavinsky, tilted his chin up threateningly, and spat with venom, “Fuck off, dumb shit.”

And it was actually so much like Ronan that Adam acted completely on instinct. He laughed, and then, when Kavinsky had flipped them off and moved on, leaned over to press a chaste kiss to Ronan’s lips.

Except it wasn’t Ronan.

It was Gansey.

Adam reared back, horror flooding his body. Not only had he just kissed Gansey but he had done it in the crowded halls of Aglionby, which meant that at least thirty people had watched him do it. Holy fuck, was he so desperate that he couldn’t help himself, even though he knew that Ronan wasn’t Ronan right now?!

Oh shit oh fuck.

“…I’m very confused,” Gansey said. He looked it, too. “Do you usually do this with Ronan? And did I just get kissed by myself?”

Adam gaped, flustered and at a complete loss for words. He tried to explain himself, but it just came out as a big jumble: “I—I mean, yeah, recently Ronan and I have been…But Gans, I didn’t mean—You just looked—Ronan—”

“…I think I’m going to go find Jane,” Gansey said, slowly inching away. He had on his politician’s smile, which looked like a nightmare on Ronan’s face. “I am happy for you and Ronan though, I truly am! I just don’t see you in that way, Adam, I’m sorry!”

Adam groaned and buried his face in his hands.

VI.

Declan stalled when he saw Ronan at the end of the hall. Declan often stalled in the hall because of his younger brother—either because he was beating someone’s face in or passed out drunk against a locker—but this time he stalled merely because he absolutely could not believe what he was seeing.

Ronan was laughing. Ronan was smiling. He wasn’t slouching or wearing his tie improperly and he honest to God looked like he was flirting. Or trying to. The other boy seemed both charmed and offended by whatever was coming out of Declan’s brother’s mouth, which honestly wasn’t that surprising. But this…this was surprising.

Declan didn’t mean the whole gay thing. He knew Ronan was gay—it had been obvious to him since the time he found a cut out picture of a shirtless Leonardo DiCaprio underneath Ronan’s bed—and it didn’t bother him. A lot of things bothered Declan about his younger brother, but being gay was not one of them. In fact, it was probably the least offensive thing about him.

But for the love of God, did the person of his younger brother’s obvious affections really have to be Henry goddamn Cheng?

VII.

-the present-

“I can’t believe you kissed Gansey because he actually managed to act like me,” Ronan gasped, struggling to breathe through his laughter. “And cursing out K of all people!”

“Will you shut the fuck up?” Adam hissed, a blush on his cheeks.

They had made it back to Monmouth before anyone else and were thus lounging around in the main room. Ronan was lying in Main Street of Gansey’s model of Henrietta—Blue’s body was small enough to do it without crushing anything, and Ronan had always wanted to—and Adam was spread out across the couch.

“No, I can’t, you’re so fucking desperate,” Ronan cackled, kicking his legs in the air. “Holy shit.”

Adam threw a notebook at him and nearly took out the library. “I’m never kissing you again.”

“Yeah, good luck with that,” Ronan snorted. “I think today proved that you need to kiss me every time I say ‘fuck’.”

“I hate you.”

Ronan sarcastically blew him a kiss.

Just then, Blue burst her way into Monmouth. “We need to go back to Cabeswater and make it fix us. Right. Now.”

“Not having a good time as Cheng, Sargent?” Ronan asked, amused.

“No, Henry’s fine! I love him dearly, and it’s kind of fun hanging out with the Vancouver crowd at school and actually getting something accomplished when I protest!” Henry shot her a thumbs-up as he slipped by behind her. “No, the problem is Gansey – he couldn’t control himself at school today and made me kiss. Ronan.”

To his credit, Ronan held it in for about one second. Then he burst out laughing, resuming his limb flailing with how little he could keep his shit together. “Holy fuck, Parrish just told me a similar story! What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Am I the only one who didn’t try to kiss someone today?”

“I haven’t kissed anyone either, though I think Tad Carruthers wanted to,” Henry said. Adam and Ronan both made a noise of disgust. “I also totally bombed that history test, sorry Parrish.”

Adam looked like the world had just ended. “You what?!”

“See what I mean?” Blue shouted, gesturing wildly. “We’re all a disaster! We need to get our own bodies back!”

“I agree,” Gansey said, placing a hand on Blue’s shoulder. “Being Ronan is too exhausting.”

Ronan’s grin was sharp. “Isn’t it hell?”

“Being you, Gans, is too exhausting,” Adam said, standing up from the couch. “Alright, let’s go back to Cabeswater.”

“Maybe if we camp again, Cabeswater will kindly switch us back while we’re sleeping,” Henry suggested.

Everyone mumbled their agreement and grabbed their camping gear that had been tossed haphazardly around Monmouth after the last excursion. When they headed down to the Pig to pack it all up, however, everyone realized there was a problem: Ronan—who was really Gansey—had automatically grabbed for the driver’s side door of the Pig.

“It’d be weird if someone saw anyone but Three driving the Pig,” Henry pointed out.

“Especially if the person driving was Ronan,” Adam added.

Gansey set his jaw but reluctantly handed the keys to Adam. “I dislike this plan.”

“Hey, at least I’m not the one in your body,” Ronan sniped back, but there was a part of him that really, really wished he was. “I call shotgun.”

Gansey’s mouth dropped open. “No.”

“Blue usually does occupy the passenger’s seat now,” Adam pointed out. Ronan pointed at him.

“Just because you’re dating now doesn’t mean you can gang up on me about my car,” Gansey chided, but folded himself into the backseat, smacking his head on the way in. “God, Ronan, how do you stand being so tall?”

“Wait, wait, wait!” Henry shouted. “Lynch and Parrish are an item?!”

“Since when?” Blue screeched. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“It literally just happened yesterday,” Adam snapped as he plopped down into the driver’s seat. He was determinedly not looking at anyone.

“Then why does Gansey know?!” Blue demanded.

“Because Parrish fucking kissed him earlier!” Ronan shouted, falling into laughter again.

“God, shut the fuck up,” Adam hissed and jammed the keys in the ignition so hard that the Pig started up without protest.

They were all silent for a moment, and then Henry said, “Oh, because he looks like Lynch right now?”

“It was a confusing time for me,” Gansey said. “I wasn’t sure who Adam was trying to appeal to honestly.”

“Shut up!!” Adam shouted and revved the car forward.

Everyone laughed, but dropped the teasing for now.

As the backseat dissolved into some ridiculous debate, Ronan cranked the window down and leaned his arm out. Just because he could—and because he had the station saved on Gansey’s radio—he switched on his pounding EDM. For once, Adam didn’t turn it off.

Perhaps he was starting to realize how great it was to drive to. Especially in the fucking Pig.

Because he was sitting next to him, Ronan heard the little gasp that escaped Adam as he pushed the Pig onto the freeway. He must’ve been able to feel what gave Ronan chills whenever he thought about driving the Pig: the engine growling under his thighs, the squeal of the tires as he pushed the Camaro as fast as it could go. There was no high like it in the world; not even Kavinsky’s dreamed up drugs could do it.

“Parrish,” Ronan said.

It was all it took for Adam to slam his foot down on the gas. Ronan let out a whoop as Adam shot into the HOV lane and blasted down the freeway, easily pushing the car to 70, 75, 80.

“Adam!” Gansey shouted, but whatever else he was going to say was lost to the wind and the music.

Ronan glanced over at Adam, admired the satisfied grin across his face and the energy thrumming in his eyes. As he was watching, Adam turned and flashed him a grin, one full of wildness and adrenaline and gasoline.

God, how Ronan wished he didn’t look like Gansey right now, because he wanted to kiss him.

“Hey Gansey Boy!” someone shouted from the next lane over. Ronan glared out the window to see Kavinsky’s band of merry fucks all packed into the car next to them. Kavinsky was strangely absent, however—they were in some other shit car, rather than the Mitsubishi—and it was Prokopenko sneering the taunts. “You teaching Lynch how to drive?”

Ronan almost snarled back before he remembered that he had to let Gansey answer.

“Fuck you, you know?” Gansey shouted back.

“Fuck me,” Ronan groaned and put his head in his hands. Adam snickered. “Is that how he’s been all day?”

“Pretty much,” Adam replied. Ronan groaned again. To his surprise, however, Adam leaned over him to say to Kavinsky’s pack, “Lynch would be lucky to learn how to drive like this.”

And to Ronan’s utter delight, pushed the car up to 90 and zoomed past the other car.

“Parrish, I think I might love you,” Ronan said, grinning.

“Gross!” Blue shouted.

Ronan cheerfully sent her the middle finger.

“You heathens are going to wreck my car,” Gansey bemoaned.

Adam just grinned at Ronan and Ronan felt the weight of it in his chest.

Fuck, he was so far gone.

Despite Gansey’s worry, they all made it to Cabeswater in one piece, and in record time if Ronan did say so himself – he was so fucking proud of Adam. As before, they trekked into Cabeswater and set their tents up in the main clearing. No one was as eager to explore this time around—as it felt dangerous to do something vaguely unsafe when none of them could get used to the bodies they were in—so they set up the campfire right away. They roasted marshmallows and made fun of each other for all of the dumb things they’d done in each other’s bodies today and all around them Cabeswater hummed with amusement. Ronan could feel it in his skin, and seeing Cabeswater so happy almost made him willing to forgive it for this.

The outcomes of this adventure had been fucking hilarious, after all.

But they were all ready to go back to their own bodies.

So as the fire went out, they crawled into their respective bodies’ tents, Adam, Ronan, and Blue diving into Gansey’s tent and Gansey and Henry settling into Ronan’s tent. Around them, the forest quieted as Cabeswater created a safe and peaceful setting for their sleep.

“Gansey Boy, it’s a good thing we love each other or this would be very awkward,” Henry could be heard saying from Ronan’s and Adam’s tent.

“What the fuck are they doing in there?” Ronan hissed.

Adam shook his head. “Hopefully we’ll find out tomorrow.”

“Or hopefully not,” Blue joked.

But they were hopeful as they all fell asleep. Ronan was especially hopeful, as right before Adam drifted off, he reached across the small space between them and grabbed Ronan’s hand.

This time, Ronan’s hand was not sweaty.

VIII.

Ronan woke up to Adam’s face and hope shivered down his spine. “…Adam?”

Adam’s eyes slid open slowly. He didn’t seem to be processing anything, as he was always groggy when he first woke up. (Ronan knew this from his time spent at St. Agnes; one time he had witnessed Adam get up, shower, and then come back into the room and tell Ronan he had to take a shower. Ronan had had to tell him—making fun of him all the while, of course—that he had already taken it.) But then his eyes focused. “…Ronan?”

Ronan breathed out a sigh of relief. “Fuck, yes.”

“Oh thank God,” Adam said and pulled him into a searing kiss.

“I told you you wouldn’t be able to never kiss me again,” Ronan snarked when Adam let him pull back for a second to breathe.

“Shut the fuck. Up,” Adam growled.

Turned out that Ronan had a hard time disobeying Adam when he worked his mouth like that.

IX.

Declan approached Ronan on his way to first period the next day (he couldn’t believe he’d been forced to go to school twice in a row). Ronan was immediately defensive – a purposeful visit from Declan was almost never a good thing, and it usually ended in throwing punches. They’d been trying to be better lately, but Ronan was still too easily riled and Declan was still too easily an asshole.

However, this time, Declan completely threw him for a loop. “Ronan, I really must talk to you about your taste in boyfriends—”

Ronan reared back, startled but refusing to show it. “What the fuck do you have against Parrish? And how did you know about that, anyway? Are you spying on me?”

“You’re…dating Parrish?” Declan stammered before breaking into a huge grin, which Ronan honestly found disturbing. “Oh thank God, as long as it’s not Henry Cheng I really don’t care who the fuck you’re dating.”

Ronan reared back again, this time out of offense. “Why the fuck would you think I was dating Henry fucking Cheng?”

“I saw you flirting with him yesterday.” Declan said ‘flirting’ like he would say ‘debauching’.

At that, and to Declan’s obvious confusion, Ronan burst out laughing. He laughed so hard he bent over himself, clutching at his stomach. Holy fuck he couldn’t breathe…!

“Ronan, are you okay?” Declan asked. “You never laugh this much – are you dying?”

“Fucking yeah I am,” Ronan wheezed before sending his older brother a grin. “Don’t worry, Dec – that was just a mistake. Thought he was someone else.”

“What.” Declan seemed even more confused. “How could you mistake Henry Cheng for anyone but—”

“Oh God, would you look at the time? Bye, Dicklan!” Ronan shouted over his brother and ran off to find Adam, ignoring Declan cursing at his back.

Tad Carruthers was walking down the hall when he saw Adam Parrish.

Tad was always on the lookout for Adam Parrish, as he lived off of the occasional glances he could get and thrived off the conversations Adam allowed him to have with him. He had become a pro at scanning the crowd for him, so it was easy to spot his dirty-blonde, wind-blown hair and his freckled face. Looking for Adam had even become something to look forward to every day that Tad went to school.

Usually, Tad approached Adam immediately. But this time, he stopped right in the middle of the hallway and gawked.

He couldn’t believe his eyes.

Sebastian had said he’d seen Ronan Lynch kissing Richard Gansey III yesterday. Atticus had said he’d seen Lynch kissing Henry Cheng yesterday, and apparently these events had taken place mere minutes after each other.

And now Lynch was kissing Adam Parrish?!

…Just how many boys had Ronan Lynch kissed at this school?!

(A/N) Let there be no doubt in your minds that immediately following this Tad went to confront Ronan and made a fool of himself. And probably got his ass kicked ;)

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awfully-sadistic · 5 years

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{{ Book Talk: The Boy Who Sneaks in My Bedroom Window

This question on Goodreads sums up my thoughts.

I don’t know what to say about this book or why I started to read it. I just did when I was looking for The Raven Cycle ‘cause I have a ridiculous crush on a character I don’t even know yet. Ronan.

Anyway, this fucking book. I thought it was like, fanfiction at first. It is certainly written that way. There is such a huge overuse of “he smirked/smirks” and “she smirked/smirks” and other cliche phrases, I’m going to throw up. There’s also an over abundance of the main character, Amber Something, calling other girls whores and sluts and basically slut shaming them for dressing how they want to dress--FOR WHICH THERE IS NO DRESS CODE AT SCHOOL, I GUESS. One of the instances of Amber describing a girl’s skirt was that it fit like a belt or something. Another instance is her putting down other girls for being loose, for wanting to have sex with her brother and his best friend. For being bimbos and ho’s and having no self-respect because apparently this author wrote every fucking woman in her school like this. EVERY WOMAN AT AMBER’S SCHOOL (EXCEPT FOR AMBER) WAS A THIRSTY SLUT OR A BITCH OR A HO after her brother and his best friend’s junk. They literally threw themselves at them, were incredibly bold with their flirtations like touching and grabbing them all the time. Like, these ladies were written desperately thirsty, I felt bad for them. All because the author wanted to portray Amber in a more angelic light or what?

Speaking of, her main love interest gave her the nickname Angel.

Oh, by the way. She slut shames her main love interest, Liam James, too. I only know his goddamn name because everyone calls him by his fucking whole name, like constantly. Don’t get me wrong, I guess he’s some sort of man-whore because he openly flirts with these girls right back so I suppose if she’s going to be calling the women sluts and whores, I’m glad she also calls Liam out for acting the same way??? So does Amber’s brother, Jake, and he’s known to have slept around, etc, etc. Basically everyone but Amber is a big ol’ slut.

Don’t even get me started on how Amber decides to take part of this stupid ass bet to “nail” Liam because he announced he had a girlfriend and ALL THE OTHER GIRLS IN SCHOOL WANT HIM. His fucking pot was raised to 4,000 dollars or something outrageous like that. 20 bucks per girl. They put in 20 dollars EACH into the pot to see who can convince him to virtually cheat on his girlfriend. Which, at this point, is Amber. 4000 dollars. 20per girl. i suck at doing math but is that like 200 girls??? IS THAT RIGHT? DID I DO MY MATHR IGHT? 200 GIRLS ARE AFTER LIAM’S ASS.

I honestly don’t know where to start with this.

I mean, I can start with how it feels incredibly juvenile. Amateurish. Half-finished? There seems to be a lot of details missing in between scenes and the scenes themselves are short as fuck. The transitions are incredibly sloppy, one second Amber is in her bathroom and the next she’s in school.

Can I also note how her eight year old dialogue was incredibly strange. It felt like an older person was talking.

A few more points:

1) she doesn’t want to tell anyone they’re dating. she makes liam wait like 2 weeks to break the news to her overprotective big brother (by two years because they’re both 18 and she’s 16).

2) her best friend magically finds this out because i guess she just does. and all of a sudden she went from thirsty ass bff to supportive ass bff and stops trying to nail Liam AND jake. wait no, she’s still trying to fuck amber’s brother.

3) she’s somehow emo. idk. she wears dark clothing and all the other “sluts” at school call her emo. and how liam will never be into her.

4) liam went from biggest fucking vagina humper to absolutely cult-like dedicated to amber like as soon as they shared their first kiss. i guess that’s sort of sweet if he weren’t a total fuckboy. he said he had been in love with her since he was six??? (which was make her 4 or something) and only slept around with all those women because he figured he’d just fall in love with someone else. he couldn’t have a chance with her because her brother forbid it.

5) brother eventually finds out and comes around like in a manner of minutes. found out because liam and amber have some sort of special technique he uses whenever amber has some sort of anxiety attack about her dad.

6) SPEAKING OF, HER DAD ALMOST RAPED HER when she was like 13.. or idk. something like that. sundays were usually reserved for “special” times when he’d touch her or whatever. basically dad is an abusive assfuck. jake and liam came home early from some kind of hockey game, saw the scene and apparently beat the shit out of the dad.

7) dont even know the extent of how far she was molested because she never fucking talked about it. im opting to believe it was that one instance and she was just milking it. idk.

8) for as much as she went around in the first few chapters of the book saying how much she hated liam, how much she called him a man-slut, etc etc and being mean to him because oh he annoys her sooo much, he’s sooo mean, etc etc, she’s absolutely in love with him even though she’s finding reasons ...not to be. thinking he might cheat on her, get fed up with amber wanting to wait because she’s not letting him have sex yet. mainly because no one else but her mom, jake, and liam can touch her, ever, without her freaking out about it. but in the span of these few chapters ive read, two strangers have kissed her twice now.

8a) first time, liam had to save her because she was drunk and blah blah blah. second time, she was openly flirting with a guy who was all, “i bet if i kiss you i can change your mind about wanting to go out with me” and she was all “i bet you 20 bucks you can’t and also i will kick you in the balls if you try” and what the fuck happened? he kissed her. she kicked him in the balls. liam’s like “that’s my girl” as the dude comes back limping into the room and hands her a 20.

9) “I’d wanted her for so long that I was a little worried that if I ever did get her, that she would never be able to live up to what I had imagined.“ CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT THIS MEANS because to me, Liam saying this about Amber makes me feel like this can almost be an insult lmfao.

10) AND THIS IS THE SEX SCENE, FINALLY BTW:

“You are so beautiful, Angel,” I whispered. She smiled and gripped her hand around the back of my head, guiding my mouth back to hers. I felt my heart swell as I kissed her passionately, showing her just how much I loved and cherished her before I prepared myself to make love to her for the first time.

I smoothed her hair away from her sweaty forehead. She was grinning at me and looked so happy it made my heart skip a beat. “I love you, Angel.” We laid there trying to slow our heart beats. I pressed my face into the crook of her neck kissing her, feeling her rapid pulse under my lips. I felt happier than I had ever felt in my life. After a minute or so, I pulled out of her and rolled to my side. I tightened my arms on her, pulling her close to me, trailing my fingers over her naked, sweaty body, lingering on her breasts. “I’m sorry I hurt you,” I said quietly. I felt awful that I was the one to have to cause her pain, but I guess every girl had to go through that the first time.

Did this author really write “after a minute or so”? I was like, where’s the penetration? I had NO idea they were fucking until he pulled out... A MINUTE LATER.

11) everyone must be a goddamn cat or something because there’s a lot of seductive purring. and I ran into this hilarious count in a review:

Wink count: 48 Purr count: 37 Smirk count: 74 Flirt count: 38 Ass count: 91 (this one was the most annoying...everyone calls each other "hot ass" "sexy ass" "fine ass" nonstop throughout the entire book)

there is plenty more i can say about this train wreck but i think, above all, i was just... surprised it was like... PEOPLE LIKED THIS?? it even had this little thing at the end of the summary:

The international bestselling novel, and finalist of the Goodreads choice awards YA fiction 2012.

like... what... how can people pump out novels like 50 Shades and this mess and I can’t fucking finish a chaptered story? some of the answers answering that question i had tacked on above surprised me too. people were calling it “realistic” -- i had to roll my eyes. there has been no realistic part of this story since i started reading it.

if it were, vampires would exist and they’d sparkle in the goddamn sunlight. frankly, we’d all have our Christian Grey by now, too.

and every time he called her Angel, i just imagined this:

youtube

thank you and goodnight.

#{{ Book Talk

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