Proposed:

Vegas and Porsche spend a whole bunch of time plotting to kill Korn, only for Macau and Chay to get there first.

Some intense questioning and emotional manipulation by his Hia finally get out of Macau that he lied when he initially told everyone that he stumbled into Korn and accidentally knocked him down the stairs when Korn grabbed his wrist during an argument, but he wanted to protect Chay. He says that the two of them didn't think people would believe Korn fell accidentally when Chay tried to push him away from Macau, after Korn grabbed Macau's wrist during an argument.

Some emotional manipulation by Porsche does not get anything out of Chay, who just looks at Porsche with big wet eyes from under his bangs and doesn't uncurl from the corner of the couch in Tankhun's rooms.

Some intense questioning by Kim does not get anything more than a "fuck off" out of Chay when Kim 1) calls bullshit on Macau's confession to Vegas and 2) accuses Chay of now taking the rap for Macau because they all know that no one would ever believe it was an accident when the displaced second son of the minor family pushed Korn Theerapanyakul down the stairs during an argument.

(Kim is not ... entirely correct. He's not entirely wrong, either, for all the good it does him.)

Kinn gets nothing out of anyone, because neither of these kids trusts him as far as they could spit. If Kinn was the least bit trustworthy, Vegas would be head of the minor family and Porsche would not - this is something both Macau and Chay have been in agreement on for a long time.

Tankhun takes one look at both of them in tears, Macau practically hyperventilating, just after they're pulled away from Korn's body in the stairwell - these two boys who previously have always been protected in one way or another from the dirty work of this family - and he KNOWS there was nothing accidental about it. He's just not sure who actually did the pushing, so he keeps his mouth shut because he doesn't really care about Vegas's brother, but no one is going to do anything to his baby chick Chay if he has anything to say - or not say - about it. (Pa shouldn't have given him a kid, if he didn't want something more important than Pa in Tankhun's life.)

Tankhun's right about one thing - it wasn't an accident.

Macau never - ever - admits to anyone that they did it together, 1-2-3-go, when Korn made the mistake of turning his back to them while he was at the top of the stairs to Nampheung's garret. Occasionally, Macau will catch Pete looking at him speculatively, head tilted just a bit, and Macau just stares back with the blandest look he can manage until Pete shakes his head and looks away. (These are, in fact, the only times Macau can manage to win a staredown against P'Pete. He doesn't realize how suspicious that is, in and of itself.)

(Macau never, ever, wants Vegas to know that their family - who Vegas tried so hard to protect him from - stained him enough that he could commit murder, even if it was in order to protect his Hia.)

Chay tells Porsche three years later during an argument right before Chay packs his things and moves out of the main family compound for the last time. He doesn't tell Porsche that Macau was the one to first send a significant look Chay's way when Korn dismissively turned his back on them at the top of the stairs. He does tell Porsche that he's the one who gave the final go-ahead nod to Macau.

(Chay absolutely wants Porsche to know that the Theerapanyakul family - who Porsche exposed him to - stained him enough that he could commit murder in order to protect his Hia.)

Working title: Nobody Talks, Everybody Walks

I'm letting this break discord containment:

Spurred on entirely by Dum Dum MV

thinking about this stupid mv again. I kinda want enemies to lovers thing where this unhinged Kim is in this fun little competition with a neighboring drug lord's little brother.

At first, Kim just thinks he's a little twink that gets free blow and all the guys he wants, but when he finally catches up to him and holds the gun up to his face instead of the scared little boy he thought he was, chay just looks him dead in the eyes, while smiling and licks up the side of the barrel and then turns around and runs away while giggling. It makes Kim want to kiss kill him even more.

drabble under cut:

It's been a couple weeks since Kim has seen that blasted twink. He's been out of the province on another one of his father's quests, so when he's back in town he goes fishing for a good lay. He finds a nice girl, and they skip dinner and all the formalities and sleep together at his apartment. Stupid, Kim knows, but he needs to unwind its been a while.

The following day the sun creeping through the usually dark windows wakes Kim, the girl was already gone. He gets up and does his normal routine, but when he gets ready to leave he notices his boots are gone. Oh well he thinks, he'll just get another pair, but they were kind of growing on him.

Now that he's off for at least a week, he decides to check in on the family business, the clubs. He picks one of the darker, fun ones.

He's been in the vip suite overlooking the dance floor for a while now already a few drinks in when he notices someone on one of the Lyra hoops. Not unusual for amateurs to mess around on them when the aerialists aren't performing, it's allowed. But something about the short skirt kid is the boots on his feet as they kick up in the air. The same boots, it appears, as the ones the girl stole from Kim earlier that week.

The boy leans back and Kim realizes who it is: Chay.

Kim watches the kid as he twirls on the hoop with clenched fists, the glass in his hand shaking. He's actually pretty good at it, even with the heavy boots and sub-optimal clothing. Something stirs deep inside him, (and maybe in his pants.)

He's two seconds away from jumping up to go after him when he sees someone reach up and grab Chay, scurrying away with him. Kim tries to track them through the crowd, but there are too many people.

The glass shatters as Kim launches it into the wall. He's going to get that kid, even if it's the last thing he does.

KimChay Thoughts Part III: The Tables Have Turned.

Okay, coming at you with more unfiltered KimChay thoughts; my apologies if this is disorganized.

I’ll be repeating some stuff from previous posts, but I hope not to get too long winded.

First, the scene in which Kim is writing music establishes another contrast between him and Vegas (which I initially discussed in this post.) Vegas is not letting a few guns in his face keep him from trying to further manipulate Porsche. He’s not even letting a jail cell keep them apart. He will absolutely break Porsche out of prison, hit on Pete, and everything else under the sun to progress his mission of destroying the main family. 

In contrast, Kim cannot stay focused. In episode 8, Kim swears he’s done with investigating the brothers. He stops answering Porchay’s calls because that’s his half-hearted attempt to break things off, to let Porchay down (but let him down gently because Kim is emotionally invested.) Porchay sings to him, and Kim (to our knowledge) doesn’t give Porchay any feedback on his song in an attempt to keep that distance from someone who shouldn’t matter to him. Kim is trying to salvage his initial purpose: focus on protecting his family. He can’t get distracted any longer; he must go back to the two roots, the two sure things in his life: music (his passion) and the mafia family (his obligation.)

Unfortunately, episode 9 shows us that this return to roots is not possible for Kim. In a weird way, I’m both a little happy and mad that some of my predictions came true: the first being he cannot protect his family. Kinn is, allegedly, taking Tawan’s word over Porsche’s (and we know that Kim could not find any grounds to distrust Porsche). Kinn is, allegedly (if we assume his actions are not part of his grand master plan to manipulate Tawan and find the mole) in a vulnerable spot that Kim is unaware of. Kim has failed. His family is coming apart, and his brother is in danger.

The second is that music is no longer the same for Kim. We see this as he reflects back on Barcode’s song in order to create music again. At this point, he needs Porchay as a person, as a muse, as even a lover. Music is no longer the same without Porchay, which is going to lead to some devastating consequences for Kim and Porchay since all of this was rooted in mafia business. 

Which is why this post is titled as The Tables have Turned. Look at Kim, who possibly planned to further manipulate Porchay by making him write a love song (and perhaps to also deepen Porchay’s feelings for him), who is now using Porchay as his inspiration. Is he writing a love song? No guarantee but, oh, how the tables have turned. In my opinion, the ruse is up as soon as he needs to think about Porchay to make music. Kim has temporarily abandoned his mission to just exist alongside Porchay, which is a dangerous thing to do since Porchay is now involved with the mafia, which is entirely Kim’s fault.

Now, with the scene in which Porchay is making the pick, we see that Porchay is patient. He tries to stay that way. Porchay waits for an answer, but being an absolute gremlin and with true big dick energy, he then demands an answer as he gifts Kim with the handmade pick.

Kim reciprocates. He kisses Porchay and hugs him. In a way this is both failure and success. 

The failure: Here’s a picture of a man who realizes his ploy is over. That’s he’s in too deep; now, he's the one under someone else’s thumb. That he’s done exactly what his father has warned them not to do: to get emotionally involved with chess pieces. Here’s a picture of a man who realizes his next actions are going to devastate this boy, tear himself and his muse apart. Here’s a picture of a man who can no longer protect his family because of his own emotions. 

The success: Here’s a picture of a man who realizes his ploy is over. That he’s in too deep; now, he’s so enamored by this person that his defenses are down, and he’s okay with that vulnerability. Here’s a picture of a man who has temporarily forgotten he’s a mafia kid. That he can have a normal life with a normal relationship. That he can sit around and make music and think of his muse. Here’s a picture of a man who is tense, hesitant, but relieved.

Why is Kim relieved? Well, because he could never make the first move. Kim’s simply not in the position to do that. So Porchay does it for him, and he’s so goddamn happy and relieved and excited because more often than not, Kim is struck speechless by Porchay (i.e.: finding the shrine, getting serenaded, receiving the pick). So much so that instead of speaking, he moves into kiss Porchay’s cheek. And even though we can see some hesitation, some worry as he hugs Porchay, he’s still somewhat happy because he succeeded: he’s in love, and it’s pure, with no strings, no demands, no interference (as of now.)

So. Future predictions? This happiness of Kim’s will not last; it’s not meant to last for a character like Kim. A character like Kim, in a family like his, cannot possibly stay in the shadows and only emerge when he wants to. He can’t pick and choose what parts of Mafia Life he participates in (his little murder investigation with Porchay has proven this tenfold.) Porchay, in true Porchay methodology and chaos, will demand answers from Kim, and Kim will not be able to fend off those questions. Kim is about to learn that he cannot protect his family and the consequences that entails on his family's business, and worst of all, he probably cannot protect Porchay, his muse, either, and he will have to face the consequences that has on his heart. And it’s his fault.

me, who hates all the unnecessary singing in bl dramas:

Hiii

I remember when you were posting about your Kim/Wik Twins AU and I was so hooked! There’s so much potential for angst in this AU😩🤌 I always wondered if there was anything new going on with this WIP.

PS: I’ve been following your blog for a little while (I don’t interact bc im shyy) and I love all your Kimchay WIPS and little excerpts you’ve blessed us with (they make my day everytime I see one). So I want to personally thank your brain for all these wonderful ideas and just thank you for being you 😊

send me an ask and I'll tell you about one of these WIPs!

Oh anon, you're a darling! This was so nice to wake up to <3 I actually haven't worked much on that AU since originally posting it, but you're right, there is so much angst potential in this AU between Wik and Kim. One of the inspirations from it actually came from World of Warcraft, and how the character Varian was split into two people, the other one being Lo'Gosh. I really loved how it wasn't just "this is the good side vs. the bad/feral side." Varian was polite and charming and good at socializing, but he was also vain and easy to manipulate (which was the point of splitting him), whereas Lo'Gosh was definitely a barbarian, but he was also all of Varian's strong will and ambition/motivation, and passion. I hadn't seen that kind of character splitting before, because it's usually an easy shorthand for doing a good/evil thing.

So for the purposes of this fic, Kim isn't just all the evil mafia while Wik is the sweetheart singer. Wik is very driven and tbh a little selfish, he's kind to his fans but ultimately very cold, because he grew up in a world where anything he cared about could be used against him. Both of them are still calculating in clever, but it's Wik that begins investigating Chay, intentionally using his stardom as an in, and purposefully manipulating him to get more information. He takes it to a stronger degree than we actually see from Kim in the show.

Whereas Kim is the quieter, more contained side. They both love music but Kim prefers guitar/piano over singing because he doesn't want to draw attention to himself the way Wik does, although he does write a lot of poetry/lyrics. One of the betrayals from Wik leaving is that he stole Kim's songs. The other is that he left Kim behind. He loves his brother more than anything, and Wik leaving him without so much as a goodbye was devastating for him.

Here's your slightly less than 500 words!

“You left me!” “Would you have even come with me?” Kim’s voice breaks on a desperate, “Yes!” He wants to take it back as soon as the word leaves his mouth, too honest in the heat of his moment, chest heaving with the weight of it. The only good thing about the admission is that his brother is too stunned to reply; Kim takes satisfaction in that, in the implication of it, as Wik realizes the depth of his own selfishness.  “Kim…” “I would…” Kim swallows. Days of captivity have left his throat dry. It hurts, speaking these words aloud, tearing them out of his chest to release them after all these years. “I would have. If you asked me to, I would have.”  He would have followed his brother anywhere. They were always meant to be together. Kim and Wik, two halves of the same whole, mirror images down to their names. Until Wik decided he couldn’t bear his own reflection anymore.  “Kim, I’m sorry, I didn’t know—” “How could you? You only ever think about yourself.” Kim laughs. It’s wet. It hurts, like everything else about this damned conversation. Maybe Wik was right; they were better off alone. “I thought you knew me better than anyone, but you don’t know me at all.” Maybe Wik never did. What a horrible time to realize how truly alone he really is.  Wik doesn’t speak for a long time. Neither does Kim, keeping his head bowed and his breaths measured, cracked ribs aching with every rise and fall of his chest. What a cruel joke that the first time they’re sharing a space in years, something Kim has longed for since the day Wik left, and it’s only because someone else has forced them together.  “I don’t think you would ever leave the family,” Wik eventually says, his voice quieter than Kim has ever heard it. “You’re not like me, Kim, you never wanted to leave.” Of course he didn’t. Why would Kim ever want to leave his brothers? But at least if he had, Kinn and Tankhun would have had each other. They wouldn’t have been alone, not like Wik is now. Not like Kim is, forever missing his other half. Neither of them were meant to be alone. "It doesn't matter anymore." "Yes it does. Kim. I never meant to hurt you. I—" But there's no more time to talk because their captors are walking in, and Wik is throwing himself in front of Kim, both of them bound and unable to put of any kind of fight. Not that it would have mattered; Wik already got himself kidnapped. Too nosy to stay out of the family completely, but apparently the idealistic fool didn't bother to keep up with his martial arts. Still. Despite blaming him for the current predicament, Kim is a little bit touched that Wik is trying to protect him now. Too late to matter, maybe, but it's something.

having kimchay camboy thoughts again

anyone is free to scream at me if they like btw, the more ideas i have the more likely it is that i'll actually write it (let's just ignore the 2837 wips i have in my dungeon vault tyvm)

anyways! kim who sends chay lingerie a size too small and chay who complains about it on stream )): saying that it's tight and it stretches painfully over his little cocklet, whining about it to his fans.

kim who buys it with the very intention of seeing chay struggle in them, watching him all hot and bothered because it's rubbing against him almost painfully, painfully enough that it borders between pain and pleasure - not to mention the way his ass cheeks spill out from the back of the thong. saying that he's sorry for the "mistake" but assuring chay that he looks cute and pretty! and that he can't wait to rip them off 😻

what if...kimchay howl au

(this is a twitter thread i wrote late last night so that's why the cadence is Like That)

i just think wik would be a fantastic twink wizard frolicking through towns. chay works hard with his brother to keep their small beach front bar afloat. he has a little secret map of all the places wik the wizard turns up

chay is his biggest fan! but he's responsible. he has to help his hia out! if he sometimes heads up to the hills to see the weird tall moving house on stilts it's no ones business. (sometimes wik is there, on the balcony, sometimes chay thinks wik can see him)

and like! most old traditional thai houses have stilts! just because wiks is like five of them stacked on top of eachother and moves through the lush undergrowth like a weird spindly nimble creature...like. that's not cool, wik. that's just odd.

one day there is an extravagant visitor to the beach front bar. they're not open yet but chay bows a polite wai and welcomes the man in anyway. he is loud and exuberant and has many guards around him.

he makes many demands, food, fruit and drinks. chay is rushed off his feet but polite, serving up everything the man asks for. his smile doesn't waver. the man is pleased, exclaiming, yes, yes! perfect! a heart of gold and the sweetest smile! you're exactly what he needs!

chay, unaware that he's been chosen as the sacrificial lamb, so tankhun can pry his weirdo brother out of his weirdo moving house and back into the real world, just smiles again. it's his customer service smile but he's good at it.

the man leans over and boops his nose. it's quick and chay jumps, startled. the man just grins at him and smiles. i'm sorry for this, he says, but he's always liked a mystery. when you wake up in the morning go west. that's where he'll be!

not a ama, but this is pretty long, sorry 🥹. Ispent the last 1.5 days camping in your ao3 profile to read your ffs for kimchay and I AM SO GLAD I DID IT.

I have read the amnesia fic too many times before and I can’t believe I took this long to actually camp on your profile. Now I’ve read all your instalments for the fan mail curse and how do you even come up with these!!!! I’d read them reconciling post canon, in a thousand different ways coz you write all of it so beautifully 😭. Just completed the soulmate fic and im absolutely floored… chay wearing clothes like his brother and eyeliner🔥 lord thank you for putting that visual in my head. And the kiss in the rain I was literally blushing and kicking my feet in the air!!

One thing im so happy about your fics are how im always willing to reread them (forget me always has been reread atleast 10 times im not even kidding atp).

idk how im gonna conclude this whole rant but I had to let you know that im loving your writing so that’s the conclusion ig.

!!!!! thank you so much!!!! I am so DELIGHTED by this message. I've been in a huge writer's block slump for the last two months or so, so this is genuinely so helpful to hear that my words brought you such joy!

and WOW, I'm so in awe that you read forget me always that many times??? Thank you SO MUCH FOR TELLING ME. I hope you have a GREAT DAY. And I've been vibing with the group chat this morning, so I'll try and post some snippets of the new idea that came to me last night <3 <3 <3

I'm in Spain but the S is silent "Why Don't You Stay" KimChay Edition

Hello I'm feeling completely normal about everything this MV and I definitely did not almost start crying in the break room at work :) That being said FUCKING FUCK HOLY SHIT???

Okay so this one is for my fellow KimChayers and I'm sorry if I sound like a fever dream

But the fucking ending oh my god, is this MV going to be a scene in the show or is this going to be the bittersweet reunion of KimChay we won't get in the show? Like how long after the show's present is this?

Right now it feels like they're gonna have a really bad break, like Porchay won't want anything to do with Kim once shit (whatever shit is) hits the fan. It feels like time has passed in the MV and maybe that Chay is in college now or something and he feels like he'd like to get back in touch or smtn?????

And the fact that Kim/Jeff's sitting at Chay's table in the IG photo HHHHHHHH AND THE SONG HELLO THE FUCKING SONG YOU BETCHA I STARTED CRYING WHEN HE GOT TO THE CHORUS (and did that bastard steal Chay's song the audacity)

I don't have a conclusion to this post, I cried like a baby because of this stoopid song and MV and my brain is in like a thousand pieces bye thank you

Hi! I love all of your analysis! Could you do one of Mile and Apo's chemistry? And are you going to do a more in-depth analysis of the whole show? 👀 I'd love to see that. Thank you!

Hi hi, thank you for the lovely compliments! 

I opted out of a full review of KinnPorsche because everyone else was doing so much and talking about it. You can read what I did think on MDL.

My short summation is as follows (be warned, I was not a fan of this show). I’m not tagging my posts for KP because the fandom is so rabid and I don’t feel like arguing about it. 

KinnPorsche Thoughts 

VegasPete were in one drama; KimChay were in another; KinnPorsche were in each of those randomly but then sometimes in their own extremely slapstick cheese-fest alt-reality + Tankhun. There were clearly 2 directors with 2 distinct and conflicting points of view, who apparently never had a single conversation with each other. The whole thing felt discombobulated both from script to direction to post production. 

Was this show good? Nope.

Was it absorbing? Sure. 

Was it well acted? Absolutely. 

Were the sex scenes great? Yes. 

Were the fight scenes awesome? Actually yeah (special props to Jeff for the hand-to-hand stuff). 

Did I enjoy the kinky bits? Certainly. 

But all that said: the VegasPete universe of KP was the only universe I really enjoyed and would like to revisit, and I only got that 1/5 of the time. Mathematics is working against this one, for me personally. 

So I guess I, at least, am still waiting for the perfect mafia BL. I think it might be up to Japan at this juncture. 

As a result of fan fervor meets my own hearty indifference, I don’t really know how to judge this show but I have to go with my heart, and KP didn’t win it. 

7/10

Chemistry of the 3 Pairs 

Much as I love Jeff I thought KimChay’s chemistry was non-existent and the producers made a big mistake losing Gameplay. He would have done a much better job with the role for all he’d too old. Sorry not sorry. I say that not because I object to busting up pairs (I’m actually in favor of this) but because I think Jeff’s understandable paranoia about Barcode’s age leaked into their performance. There is a reason why actors are usually cast closer in age for comfort reasons, also to avoid minors (Although I do talk about the hung effect when it works, it works really well.)  

My thoughts on VegasPete’s winning chemistry here. 

I thought KinnPosche also had decent (if very cheeky) chemistry. It got a bit too sappy for me in the second half, much like the evolution of TharnType’s chemistry from season 1 to season 2. 

Also, like MewGulf, I got good friends + power differential + game to fuck with us from MileApo. But I am fine with that. I like it when the actor pairs fuck with dumb IRL shipping culture and idiot fandom. Partly I think we’re right back in early MaxTul territory: when we have a rich kid playing the game, he comes to the table with enough wealth and status and publicity training to torpedo straight-boy ego fears. But are MileApo as smart as MaxTul about brand? I don’t know. 

Will they be MaxTul level kings of fuckatude going forward? They could be, but like I said, I get more MewGulf vibes from them, so I think they will fold as a pair after the fan crazy does. Here’s hoping they go down classy. 

OK, I’ve been poking at Moonlight Chicken, and this is my first time with EarthMix, and as ever, these days, everything SOMEHOW comes back to KP, and this time, the thing is ... The thing is, there’s something about Mix - something about his face, I think - that keeps reminding me of Ta.

And so I’m watching this manic pixie dreamboy hitting on this older, responsible shopkeeper, and out of the corner of my eye I keep vaguely seeing Macau. And then I keep thinking - I’m a big MacauChay fan, but if we posit some kind of KimChay going forward, and free up Macau ... NOW I keep imagining Macau sneaking out nights to pick up older guys. They’re all very respectable, responsible guys - Macau has a type, and it is in NO WAY someone dangerous or volatile, thank you very much, he had and has enough of that bullshit in his life already, in various and sundry ways - but they’re definitely all significantly older than him. And meanwhile, Pete and Vegas are worried that he’s out doing drugs or fencing stolen computer gear or getting into some kind of trouble, and they’re trying to figure out why he’s skulking around and sneaking away at night, trying to figure out what he’s doing hanging out at the night markets instead of in bars or clubs like they’d expect, trying to figure out what kind of bad connections he’s making - but no. Macau is just busy sleeping his way through all of Bangkok’s very responsible, respectable Daddies. (Possibly his apocryphal crush on Dr. Top from the books is part of this pattern, now that I think about it.)

Chay, meanwhile, is super-down with this and is, in fact, Macau’s partner in crime, allowing himself to be dragged to night market after shop after restaurant in Macau’s hunt for very respectable, responsible prey, and giggling behind one hand the ENTIRE TIME. He’s possibly even more indignant than Macau is, after Pete  Vegas  Porsche  Kim (fml, trying to figure out SOMEONE in this little clusterfuck of a family who could actually do stealth is a TASK, I tell you what) surveils them, finally figures out what’s going on, and HYPOCRITICALLY outs Macau’s penchant for older men who like younger guys to Vegas and Pete. Chay cannot BELIEVE you would ever think he would let something happen to Macau on his watch, P’Pete! He PERSONALLY vets every guy Macau sleeps with, and that is not actually as bad as it just sounded when it came out of his mouth!

Pete is barely keeping himself from pointing out Chay’s OWN questionable choices, and meanwhile, Vegas has entirely given up on the task of terrorizing his little brother over this for the opportunity to smirk pointedly at Kim, who’s standing back in one corner, trying to stay out of anyone and everyone’s line of sight and pretending he’s not the BIGGEST HYPOCRITE in this room. I mean, at least Macau is in university, by this point.

Macau is keeping his mouth shut because why incriminate himself, but he knows that Vegas better not be a classist asshole about where Macau’s been pulling, lest Macau point out Vegas’s own apparent penchant for rough-trade working-class bodyguards, Hia. Sorry, P’Pete, but you’re the one who taught him to use whatever he could find as a weapon in self-defense. Just because you meant hand-to-hand combat doesn’t mean he’s not smart enough to know it works in interpersonal chess games just as well. (Thanks for nothing, Uncle Korn, you fucking fuck.)

I like this. I’m going to think about this some more.

Benji I have a question for you. What’s the one song that you heard once and now can’t stop associating it with Jeff?

Mine is this Outer Space/Carry On by 5SOS, this is the link in case you want to hear!

https://open.spotify.com/track/2hkXHnKYWhHNulTzkTrGyI?si=E6t6cNG1TsuS-BJ9kyno2g

I’ve been a 5SOS fan for years and a Jeff fan since last year so when I heard it on one of my playlists my brain went “this song fits Jeff so well I wonder if he’s heard it before” so now I’m making a playlist of songs that remind me of him so yeah. Do you have any songs that remind you of him? 👀👀👀

ahh this is a hard question! there aren't many songs i can think of that he hasn't sung that i associate with him? but if i have to pick one it would be saturn by sleeping at last. pretty self-explanatory, but the lyrics too are ones that i thought he'd really like (and then he added it to one of his public playlists so i guess he does lmaoo)

but also i listen to a lot of chinese music, and now i can't listen to the original versions of the songs he sang on call me by fire without thinking of him lol.

there are definitely a few songs that i love and wish i could share with him tho! mostly just songs that i find a lot of comfort or inspiration in. and there are a few songs by like, hua chenyu and onewe and one ok rock that make me think of him a little, either because of space references or social commentary. also "another life" by flower face, because the yearning romance of the lyrics feel like something he'd be into lmfao.

i'm sorry im not more help, but yeah there aren't many songs i associate with him outside of his own songs! I have like 5 different playlists for kim/kimchay, but nothing for jeff :')

sorry for temporarily turning this blog into a barcode fan blog but i am a fan and also it was necessary for kimchay reasons. i will be back to the regularly scheduled jeff content tomorrow

Luta Luta what do you think of the ep 11 preview? and that it's all Vegas Pete? o: and i totally get what you said in the end about Chay and him demanding Porsche to quit or he'll cut him off. I read somewhere that novel Chay has a bit more bite to him than show Chay has had. i'm kinda excited to see it! tho i'd like for it to be directed at Kim more. like....what was up with him just ditching while Chay was in the ambulance? not cool. :c

Hey Hey Bestie!!!

Okay, I would be willing to sell my body for some gifs and slow downs of episode 11 previews. It's so fucking fast but the ss that the lovely @hereiswhereitbegan28 was able to get. Have got me thinking some things.

I honestly love Kinn and Porsche. I'm just equally excited about VegasPete. They both bring me different kinds of happiness. What I'm not excited about are those that do not get VegasPete. Instead of going, not my thing and keeping it moving. We get to listen to how we should not enjoy torture from a mafia show?

KimChay... Got to say I'm not a fan of the series Chay. In the book he was a miniature Porsche. He was full of spunk And maturity. This Chay just speaks to me of a spoiled brat throwing a tantrum. As a mother to a 16 year old fucking genius. I understand teenager tantrums, there are times where you go *pop* that's me pulling your head outta ya ass. I'm not saying I don't understood Chay or get why he is doing what he is. I'm saying he is being disrespectful and shouldn't be catered to.

Kim, I honestly find very interesting. Though again, not a fan. Sorry peeps. I'm a Kinnporsche/VegasPete Stan.

Again I'm glad you enjoyed the notes! 💜💜💜

Season finale - summary of loves and relationships

Kinn Porsche They ended the season trusting each other, going through various extreme situations together, fighting together, keeping their mutual attraction, love and desire at the same, high level :) They had time to built their relationship, they were cared by the creators and it shows. The winners of this season. 👑

KimChay Chay showed inner strength by keeping Kim at distance and blocked ;) The relationship existed (?) off-screen (?) and luckily I didn't have to watch it. Sorry, but this ship was too creepy for me, Barcode as Chay is just too childish. And that's probably why the creators themselves decided to show it only in the form of photos in a Kim’s box :) Bad casting and keeping the Chay character so young ruined this couple to me. The final ep showed wasted potential of this couple, if only Chay had been played by someone looking older and if Chay had not met his crush while wearing a fucking high shool uniform.

VegasPete The last scene showed me how much they fucked up and wasted this potentially sensational relationship. For me, VP for most of the season is nonexistent, Vegas shows constant interest in Porsche, and then in a few last episodes, in a few scenes, a season worthy plot TRY to happen, just like that. The result is a narrative chaos, characters who go through several phases of a relationship in one scene, a rollercoaster of EXTREME emotions. The VP arc is crammed with: Pete The Pet, torture, beating, forced feeding, sex, lame BDSM, inner emptiness and Pete's meltdown - all of it out of nowhere, several Vegas meltdowns, numerous push-offs tangled with the pleas for love, countless issues, domestic violence and the loss of a hedgehog :D Aaaah and in the meantime, in two scenes after sex, they fell in love with each other, Pete is even hungry. But wait! it doesn't even end here! Because hey! they somehow created a nice, functional, decent family in the last scene.🤯

After VP had sweet and gentle sex and after the last scene, I am convinced that this is how the relationship was supposed to look like from the beginning: NICE. Therefore, half of the problematic tropes in their relationship were completely unnecessary. I believe that Vegas and Pete should show at least minimum of interest / fascination with each other from at least the middle of the season, and that their plot of kidnapping and torture should be handled differently. And at this point, I think BDSM shouldn't even be there at all. BDSM elements were probably just to get the fans excited (like it happened to me after first shot of Vegas in his dungeon), because in the end they turned out to be irrelevant and only added to the overall chaos. Honestly, I'd trade BDSM for some solid relationship building.  For me, this relationship has no foundation at all, no believable developement, it's not satisfying, I don't feel love or desire between them, they acted just like they’re each other's therapists, Pete looks like he genuinely hates Vegas most of the time, and Vegas spends most of the time crying and snivelling 😑  Due to this chaos, to cramming a million tropes in a limited time, because Build, sadly, can't kiss and he playes Pete as if he wanted to get as far from Vegas as possible, VP is one of the least interesting romances I've ever seen, BL, or straight. And it could be one of the best, I thought, no, I was sure, it would be :) Personally I feel robbed...

I'm glad someone is finally talking about age differences between bl characters/actors... I feel like if it was het pairings people would protest. idk who the people you mentioned are but I'm watching kp and the kimchay parts make me v uncomfortable! I was hoping they would fix the original plot, say by making Kim wait until Porschay is older. It'd still be grooming-adjacent but in their case it was the younger person pursuing the older one so it's not as gross, even tho Kim is a manipulative creep ("detective").

It feels unnecessary, especially since it's so unrealistic. While Chay's crush on his idol is 1000% plausible, Kim's feelings are not. I'm the age that Kim is supposed to be and while I can imagine thinking Chay is adorable, it is only in the way that a puppy can be adorable. He's a child, there's nothing in him that someone my age would want in a partner. He's popular, he could have anyone, so why would he choose a highschooler? I think this is made even worse by the fact that the actor's age gap is even bigger while the younger one is still underage 😐

(Sorry for such a long ranty ask 😅 i hope you have a good day today!!)

i'd say it's something that actually gets brought up quite a lot? i mean, not enough but still

yes, i see people shipping actors that have way too big of an age gap for it to be appropriate but, there are definitely people that aren't ok with it

i wouldn't say it happens too much? most companies have their actors in age appropriate couples, from what i've seen. but zeenunew, maxnat...........yikes.

yeah, about kimchay...iiiiii ah, i'm not a fan. they're cute i guess, but i watched their little part in last ep through my hands because i was so worried they were gonna have them kiss.

but, they have kept it pretty pg thankfully, and i think they'll continue to keep it that way.

also, originally the part of porchay was meant to be played by gameplay, who's worked with jeff and is the same age as him (well a year younger but).

but, after all the production company drama, he couldn't be on the show anymore, so they recast the role, and barcode got it.

the entire crew & cast are so good with making him comfortable, and safe, and everything age appropriate for him though. they really do well by him, which should be the standard, but unfortunately isn't always.

in terms if the actual story though yeeeeeah it's? i too don't get what kim could see in chay beyond being a sweet younger friend.

but?????

that's just the plot - and kimchay is a loved couple from the novel so it's not like they coukd just get rid of it.