#sorry I know this was a stupid thing to complain about
Note
Your Headcannons and fics are amazing, I love reading them so much. I’m wondering if you could do a HC of them walking in on YOU Naked for Zoro, Law, Ace, Luffy, and Kid? Thx!
YES let's gooo! i only did some of these characters, i hope that's okay! might do a pt. 2 in the future :)
them walking in on you naked (nsfw)
ft. luffy, zoro, law
masterlist
cw: suggestive content, luffy is oblivious and weird, zoro is awkward, law is also awkward
tagging: @willowbelle @eelnoise @fanaticsnail @indydonuts @sanjisprincesswifey
luffy
when luffy catches you in the bathroom, not quite fully dressed, he doesn't really see what the big deal is; in fact, he treats it just as if he had walked in on usopp or zoro, and acts accordingly.
this includes stretching his arms out to playfully tweak your nipple.
"luffy, what's wrong with you!" you squeal, covering up your chest with your towel defensively as he laughs.
"usopp always complains when i do it to him too!" he giggles, a wide grin on his face as he stares at you with his signature wide-eyed stare.
"well you can't do that to girls!" you snap, crossing your arms as you glare at him.
"how come? did it hurt or something?" he asks curiously, tilting his head and letting his head stretch just enough for the angle to become slightly unnerving.
face flushed, you begin to stammer. "no! it's just—it's sensitive, okay?" you admit, averting your eyes from his.
luffy erupts into laughter once more, turning into a snickering mess as he responds to your confession. "that kinda thing really turns you on? you're nuts y'know that?" he says, amused as his arms stretch out once more and he tries to repeat the action, this time with the intention of riling you up.
after all, he might as well get dirty before his shower rather than after.
zoro
zoro knows he shouldn't stare when he walks into the girl's quarters to come grab you for a sparring session, but he just can't help himself; he feels filthy, like that stupid moron cook as his eyes trace along your curves, but he's now been there too long that calling attention to himself or turning and leaving would both somehow make things more awkward.
the squeak you let out when you pull your shirt over your head, turn around, and realize zoro is in the room with you is downright adorable, both of your faces burning bright red with embarrassment. trying to diffuse the situation, the swordsman decides the best way forward was to change the subject and hope that the weirdness would melt away gradually. "hurry up. we're losing daylight." he spits out roughly, cringing at the way his voice cracks a bit as he speaks. silently agreeing to leave this unaddressed, you nod and follow him to the observation tower, color still deeply embedded in your cheeks.
for the first time in a while, you get the upper hand when training with him; you don't win, but you land a bunch of blows that he was incapable of defending himself from, his mind still stuck on the soft, plump flesh of your ass and the curve of your back.
law
he really should have knocked.
law should have known better than to just walk into your room, intending on asking if you were ready to head out to the local bar with the rest of the crew; admittedly, with you and ikkaku being the only girls on the ship, he sometimes forgets to give small little things like that extra thought and consideration. if it was ikkaku, he could've handled a yelp of surprise followed by her making fun of him for the next week or so, but with you he's reeling, apologizing awkwardly as he turns around and waits for you to pull your dress over your head.
"sorry about that, captain. i should've yelled out that i was getting changed. i heard the doorknob and froze up." you say sheepishly, unable to make eye contact with him.
he's equally unable to meet your gaze, the image of your bare chest burned into both his retinas and the back of his mind. "don't worry about it; it was my fault. i was just coming to get you, we're all heading out for the night." he says, swallowing hard as your lips ease into a soft smile.
"i'm ready! do i look alright?" you ask, smoothing out your sundress as you take one last look at the state of your hair. law gives you a terse nod and motions for you to grab your purse and follow him, which you do without complaint.
he's wholly unable to express it verbally, but the thinks you look gorgeous with and without the dress.
#one piece x reader#law x reader#zoro x reader#luffy x reader#trafalgar law x reader#monkey d luffy x reader#roronoa zoro x reader#luffy x you#law x you#zoro x you#law x y/n#luffy x y/n#zoro x y/n#one piece fanfiction#one piece scenario#one piece headcanons#one piece smut
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how dreamies would react to bailing you out of jail
PAIRING ▸ dreamies x reader
TAGS ▸ none, except jail and chenle being rude at first, and oh karen renjun
AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ i have never been arrested, i am a lawfully abiding citizen. have a nice day. i am perfectly normal and sane.
Mark Lee
Mark has never had to deal with the legal system before, so when he receives the phone-call from you, he’s really confused. “You’re… where?” He makes you repeat yourself and how you got in the situation. “What do you mean you can… ‘bail’ yourself out? Don’t you… have to be tried, like in front of a jury?” You have to explain to Mark how bails work, and eventually he begins to understand. “Don’t worry y/n… I’ll get you out, give me a second.” You can hear him leaving his room and running out, “CHENLE ?? CHENLE !! I NEED SOME CASH.”
Huang Renjun
Renjun is a little annoyed at first when he realizes that it’s the police station calling him and it involves you. “Well, what’d they do?” He asks, carefully, and as he listens to what the officers say, and his temper slowly starts to rise. “And you put them in jail for that?” He’s pissed off now. Not only was his day interrupted, but you got arrested for such a stupid reason. There was absolutely no reason why he needed to be involved either, so if they wanted him involved he would get involved. “You will be hearing from my lawyers…”
Lee Jeno
Jeno, like Mark, would be extremely confused on what exactly was going on. While he listened to you rant about what happened, and how you got put in jail, one thing would be on his mind: Were you a criminal now? He’s still technically trying to process everything that’s going on, nodding and expressing some “Uh-huh”s here and there to let him know you were listening, but his eyes are wide with concern. He really didn’t want you to become a criminal and agreed to buy your bail. (poor jeno)
Lee Donghyuck
Haechan cannot remain serious for once. He immediately lets out a giant laugh as soon as he hears what happened, “Yo, can you send me the mugshot? I might make some memes with it.” Obviously you aren’t too happy with this at all, and promptly hang up the call, stating that you were going to call someone else. 5 seconds later though, Haechan calls back, apologizing profusely, “SORRY. SORRY. I’LL PAY, I’LL PAY, SORRY”
Na Jaemin
Jaemin is both disappointed in you, but still worried for your wellbeing, so obviously he agrees to come bail you out, “Are you okay? I’m coming… to pick you up, don’t be scared.” When he arrives at the cell, he immediately scolds you, which he deems as appropriate payment for him having to drive over and rescue you. However, Jaemin will absolutely defend you all the way. Once he pays the bail bondsman, he then turns his attention to the officers, “Look at that face officer! Does that look like the face of a criminal to you?” It’s not until you beg him to leave that he finally gives up arguing with them.
Zhong Chenle
Chenle does not want to help you at all, “I don’t have time sorry.” (okay rude) But Chenle’s biggest mistake was calling you on facetime. You started crying and rambling about how your life was over, and how you were going to get sentenced to jail time, and this did the trick. “Okay. Fine FINE. I’M GOING.” He ends up paying a hefty sum to get your name cleared from the records and so there will be no trial for you! He doesn’t even ask if you did it or not. This is lowkey illegal and corrupt, but Chenle just doesn’t want to see you upset, and who are you to complain?
Park Jisung
Jisung is somehow so calm about the situation? Like, hearing that you got arrested doesn’t even phase him, “Where you at, send me the location, I’ll pick you up.” You’re shocked too, because you expected him to be in panic mode, but he just comes, does the whole bail process like it’s nothing and takes you home. When you’re in the car with him you can’t help but ask why he was so resolute about the whole situation. Jisung just gives you a nonchalant look, “It’s not the first time I’ve done this. Don’t do it again though.”
#nct dream#nct imagines#nct dream fic#nct fic#nct#nct dream imagine#nct x reader#nct scenarios#nct mark#nct jeno#nct renjun#nct jaemin#nct haechan#nct chenle#nct jisung#mark lee#lee donghyuck#lee jeno#park jisung#na jaemin#huang renjun#zhong chenle#chenle#renjun#jisung#jeno#haechan#jaemin#nct hard hours#nct dream imagines
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Are there people out there that really think that Star Wars is too political? And say that as if it is a flaw?
Like, I’m sorry, but did people seriously look at a saga literally named Star WARS and manage to complain about the fact that it has politics? Did these people watch the movies and only saw the lightsabers, the cool music and the pew pews? Is that all their brain could comprehend?
I’m not saying that you can’t do that, if you want to look at the fun side of the saga only than good for you, but using the argument of “too much politics” and make it the flaw of the story is so stupid.
Like that’s the point, THAT’S THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT.
George Lucas didn’t just make a story of a good guy vs a bad guy, he made a story where a Republic, a just system that has become corrupted to its core, finds itself into a devastating war and is pushed to its limit by a slimy and disgusting scheming bastard (inspired by George Bush), who then uses its weakness to take control of it and transform it, from a free system to a fascist dictatorship (inspired by Nazi Germany and the USA of the Vietnam war) and whose one of the first things he does is a literal genocide and ethnical cleansing of a religious order.
And this is only the Prequels, because in the OT the story is about how this Empire, whose head and right hand are literally the most powerful beings in the galaxy, gets utterly destroyed not by other powerful beings, not by superpowers, not by mystical forces that the human mind can’t comprehend.
But by people, normal people, the average person, who can’t fly, who can’t use mystical objects, who cannot move things with the mind or other tricks.
The heroes of these movies are the rebels, who are not fighting because of some ancient prophecy, or because of a quest given by mystical beings, or because they have to restore the fabric of the Universe, they fight because it’s the right thing to do, because this is what happens when you take away freedom from people, when you destroy their homes, when you kill their loved ones, when you obliterate everything they have ever known and loved.
Treat people like animals and they’ll react like animals, by biting the hand that carries the stick and then ripping it into shreds.
And yes, Luke is the hero that saves the day by killing Sidious and Vader, but he would have never, and I say NEVER have arrived at that point without the help of the Rebellion, it’s something that no one could have ever done alone, a single individual against an entire Empire is a suicide, no matter how powerful you are.
And I love it. I don’t even know how to put it into words, I love how this ancient and meticulous plan gets annihilated by normal people, who just wanted to be free.
THIS is Star Wars: a fight against tyranny.
And it makes me sad how people forget and ignore it. With the Rebellion it’s not just the special people who can be heroes, everyone can! And they don’t even need to do the heroic actions described in the stories and the myths.
A Hero says “No” when the Stormtroopers ask if they saw the young and scared boy who ran and hid behind the bins near their home.
A Hero gives extra blankets and food to the neighbor that is hiding refugees.
A Hero “accidentally” blocks the way of a squad of Stormtroopers, to give others the time to escape.
A Hero hides the weapons of the rebels in their well while the Stormtroopers raid all the houses.
A Hero runs through the streets and into the woods to go find the rebels that are hiding there, to tell them it’s time to run
A Hero talks loudly about the atrocities that the Empire is committing, forcing those who are silent to listen.
A Hero comforts the mother who lost all her children to the Empire.
A Hero organizes the funeral of that same mother, after she tried to take her revenge.
A Hero doesn’t let the Empire enter their head, they don’t let it change their being.
It’s all about the small acts of insurrection that pushes the line forward.
#this is what happens when I listen to stories of the partisans#I’m not good with words so this is the best I can express#star wars#star wars prequels#star wars original trilogy#star wars clone wars
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Sorry for the spam liking, your Vic's are truly amazing! <3
I was wondering if you could maybe make a yule ball fic with Regulus Black? Maybe how he asked her or the day of it ! 💗
no omg don't apologize for spam liking 😭 i truly don't gaf, it makes me happy to see that people are enjoying my writing :)
i hope you like it !!
heart burn
"no, that's stupid! stupid, stupid, stupid! why would she want roses? she has a pollen allergy!" regulus paced around his dorm, raking a hand through his now unruly curls.
once pristine, his anxious habits had caused his hair to become frizzy and tangled. his eyes were wide and bloodshot, his tie loosened and hanging limply down his wrinkled shirt.
"reg, who are you talking to- oh. should i come back later?" evan rosier poked his head into the room, hiding a laugh behind his hand. "why do you look like that?"
"shut up, i know!" regulus complained.
"does this have something to do with a certain girl? the yule ball's coming up-"
"you think i don't know that?!" regulus hissed frantically before clearing his throat to regain his composure. "excuse me. i was just trying to figure out a way to ask y/n out to the yule ball."
"that's easy, innit? just ask her. maybe some flowers, chocolates, i dunno. don't girls like that sort of thing?" evan shrugged. "anyway, i just wanted to come up here and tell you to shut the hell up. we can all hear you pacing around from the common room, so...."
sirius cooed at his little brother, pinching his gaunt cheeks. "my baby brother has finally come to me for advice on girls! i always knew this day would come! should i get balloons for this very special occasion?"
"don't make it weird," regulus rolled his eyes as he pushed sirius away. "it's just...a hypothetical situation, is all. how would one...not me, by the way....go about inviting someone to the yule ball? hypothetically, of course."
"well...hypothetically, what kinds of things does this person like? hypothetically, you should just center the invite around that person. i think you're overthinking this way too much, reggie."
"well, that's no help! obviously i should go for what she-- i mean...um, what this person likes. you've never had trouble with girls, so of course you wouldn't be able to offer any real advice..." regulus sulked.
sirius chuckled quietly, poking regulus' forehead. "c'mon kid, don't be like that. that's just the thing: it doesn't always have to be some big, monumental gesture. it's the quieter, more intimate stuff that they hold closer to their hearts. think love letters, buying that item they've been talking about for ages. to be loved is to be seen-- that's their favorite quote. that's why i told you to center everything around what she likes."
"you know, i don't care what everyone else says about you. you're actually pretty smart sometimes."
"thanks, reggie!" sirius beamed. "hey, wait a minute..."
"can i take you to the yule ball?" regulus blurted in the middle of your study date. "i-i mean, i had this whole plan, and sirius gave me advice and everything, but you just look so...pretty right now, so i just wanted to ask anyway. um, i'll just shut up now."
you let out a quiet laugh, the sound washing over him like warm ganache. "yes, reg. we'll go to the yule ball together."
"um...thank you." regulus cleared his throat in an attempt to appear nonchalant. "so...where were we? transfiguring candles?"
#fem reader#regulus fluff#regulus black fluff#regulus black x reader#regulus x reader#regulus black#marauders era#the marauders#hogwarts#harry potter#sirius black
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What do you think are Gojo and Geto’s greatest personality strengths and weaknesses? Why? What do you love about their dynamic?
Until now, have you found any couple (canon or non canon) from any media (books, tv series, movies, anime/manga, etc) that the dynamics remind you of Gojo/Geto?
Thanks if you want to answer....
(I forgot this ask in my drafts sorry)
Asking me to ramble about my hyperfixation when I'm too tired to write in correct English is cruelty actually /j
I think their strengths are mostly the same as their weaknesses. (It's only my take on them, everyone has a different opinion)
Geto's empathic, he understands people, he likes helping, giving advice, protecting, and caring ; he makes a point to ensure that everyone around him is fine and safe. He's strong so he can bear with painful tasks, he knows he can, so he doesn't complain about it. He has a great sense of morals and responsibilities. It's all amazing qualities, until it became too much.
He was caring too much, worrying too much, enduring too much, and he drowned under the weight of everything he fought so hard for. His morals contradicted his will to help people and he had to make a choice. He loved people so much he couldn't bear to see his friends die, so he sacrificed the entire world to protect them.
I think his greatest weakness is that he loved his close ones more than he loved himself, so he didn't even think about asking for help because he didn't believe people would care about him as much as he cared about them.
Geto, like everyone else, would say that Gojo is selfish, which is ironic because Geto is the one who kept everything to himself and didn't let people worry about him. He tried to fix himself alone, then decided he didn't need to be fixed.
Gojo's selfish, egocentric, forgetful, defiant, and is very much in love with his best friend. Those are weaknesses, to be clear. He's also kinda naive, because he believes things will be fine no matter what, but this is just another side of his arrogance. He hates authority figures but he needs to be told what to do because he is not able to regulate himself. He needs someone to draw a line for him, but he cannot express the importance that person has because he doesn't think it matters. Not that he doesn't believe they'd care but because he thinks they already know. (They don't- again, it's because of his arrogance).
He doesn't realize nor understand how other people feel, but that doesn't stop him from reacting accordingly. Because he knows what it's like to suffer, to be lost, to be betrayed, to be lonely. He is not empathic, he doesn't feel what people are feeling, but he was so self-centered that he lost the person he loved the most, and now that he knows the pain he can project his own emotions on others.
He's selfish and egocentric, so he saw people he could take care of and decided it'd be his responsibility to ensure they'd grow up happily. He doesn't care what the higher-ups think, he will do whatever pleases him. He also doesn't care what those people he takes care of are thinking, he forces himself into their lives because he truly believes he can make it better -and he does. (arrogance, the good side).
Gojo is arrogant and strong, he thinks he can change the world and deal with the consequences. He knows he can fight anything, so he doesn't actually worry about threats, even though it sometimes hurt his students. He proposes a status quo because he knows no one can fight him. He manages to keep Yuuta and Yuuji and Megumi safe by pure defiance.
Also it's canon that Gojo's mortal weakness is Geto himself.
What I love about them is perhaps the metaphors, the parallels, and the co-dependency. They're literally soulmates, they're a perfect match, they value each other so much it's overwhelming. They're also dumbasses and I love that kind of ship. They're handsome and pretty and gorgeous. They're smart and stupid at the same time. They're so in love that 9 years apart weren't enough to kill that. They're both little shit but one knows how to pretend to be nice. Literally EVERYTHING Gojo does as an adult is because of the influence Geto had in his life. They know each other so deeply that a simple glance is enough to recognize the other. Geto's body broke through Kenny's control because Gojo was in danger and it was the FIRST TIME it happened in CENTURIES. Hell, what is there NOT to love about them ??
Anyway. They make me think about Orpheus and Eurydice from the Greek mythology (He looked back. He knew she shouldn't, but he looked back because he loved him). I recently read a post that compared them to Achilles and Patroclus and I was like, oh, yeah, that could work.
Also, they kinda have a vibe of Steve and Bucky from MARVEL. Like, childhood friends who liked messing around together until one got lost and followed a dark path while the other had to bear the weight of the world on his shoulders and was so praised and admired that he wasn't allowed to have a life by himself. Years and years later they met again and memories came back and the world fell apart. They're enemies know, opposite sides, there's only one way to stop the other. But. But they still love each other. (I'm going to make myself cry)
I could write so much more but I'm going to stop here because I have the feeling that I'm already annoying lmaooo
#analysis#stsg#geto suguru#gojo satoru#satosugu#sugusato#jjk#answering ask#answering asks#jujutsu kaisen#character analysis#anon ask#gego#goge
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So, I looked up the article for WatchMojo’s “Top 10 Darkest Powerpuff Girls Episodes”, just for funsies. Most of their picks are pretty understandable, but some of them are complete bullshit, like this one for instance:
I’m sorry, but…huh??? I mean, sure, The Sandman being forced into an endless cycle of insomnia is rather harsh, given that he hasn’t had a good night’s sleep in a long time, but there’s nothing particularly dark or scarring in that episode. It’s quite possibly one of the silliest, most lighthearted episodes of PPG to date.
This next one’s also a big head scratcher for me, especially since it’s ranked above much darker episodes on the list like Tough Love, Power-Noia, and Knock it Off…
Okay, listen, I love this episode as much as the next Powerpuff fan, but really, the only genuinely “dark” thing about Twisted Sister was the ending. I’m sure a lot of us back in the day were sad when Bunny died (I was too), but one sad ending doesn’t automatically make it a “dark episode”.
However, the worst thing about this list, are the honorable mentions…
Now, you could make a case for Octi Evil, and maybe Candy is Dandy, but the other three are laughably ridiculous! Yes, Boogie Frights does have a spooky, Halloween-esque atmosphere, but what’s so dark about it, aside from Buttercup’s scary story at the beginning?
Also, saying that A Made Up Story is somehow a “dark episode” is truly asinine. How exactly is an episode about a supervillain whose only gimmick is to paint everything in gaudy makeup even remotely dark?! Not only is it a terrible choice for a “dark episodes” list (let alone an honorable mention), but it’s just a terrible episode in general. It has everyone act completely out of character throughout the whole thing, especially Blossom!
And Supper Villain?? PUH-LEEZE! Like I’d ever take an episode like this seriously!
I get the feeling the folks at WatchMojo didn’t see enough of the original Powerpuff Girls series, because I can name 5 episodes right off the bat that are way darker than most of those honorable mentions:
Mommy Fearest
The Headsucker’s Moxy
See Me, Feel Me, Gnomey
Insect Inside
Mr. Mojo’s Rising
#sorry I know this was a stupid thing to complain about#I just wanted to get this out of my system#ppg#powerpuff girls#the powerpuff girls#watch mojo#dark episodes#random rant
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“There is no fanfic on Stephs treatment I have checked” that’s like the whole point.
#I’m not saying ur wrong bc it’s not canon#I’m saying ur wrong bc ur perpetuating the misogyny that got u there in the first place#and yeah imma take it there it IS that deep to me sorry#like this isn’t like a diff in opinion on an arc or smth#this is quite literally the bigotry that fandoms supposed to be an escape from manifesting itself again with a rainbow flag over it it’s so#like first of all not that serious but concerning to me is getting into smth without knowing the source material#u don’t need to know the exact timeline of events and which specific Batmobile Bruce had in every era duh#that’d be hypocritical to say I read character to character screw the timeline lmao#but it’s like. ur telling me u adore Dick Grayson and have never picked up NTT?#u wanna analyze the queer coding in Tim’s character but you’ve never read his og robin run?#u wanna talk about Damian’s character growth but you’ve only read Batman and Robin 2020s?#u ADORRRRE steph and cass and you haven’t even read batgirls#and that’s like nonissues#my issues are u wanna discuss how Barbara is actually so cold and cruel to dick for how she handled Catalina and you’ve never read birds of#prey and actually dick never cheated so (this isn’t me being hypocritical if you’ve seen that post I just lowk changed my mind)#or if he did it was justified or whatever#you wanna talk about how Jason and Roy are soulmates and you can’t tell me a single thing besides he’s an archer a father and an addict#it’s like ur putting shit out there about these characters and their relationships and you don’t know them#and more people who don’t know them see ur shit and do the same thing#and that’s mid level issue#the BIG issue is that y’all have not unpacked ur racism misogyny or classism enough to do this and then turn around and say ur fixing dc or#whatever. u have not done enough work to speak on Jason or Damian and say they deserve better whilst u water down their anger into smth#palatable and sweet on ur white faves. u don’t get to complain about how there’s not enough about steph and all u do is spread more made up#shit to infantilize tim. and I’m not saying I’ll never read a tim centric fic that’s ooc and stupid and have fun#I do that and I don’t talk about it bc that shit should not be the main writing you find when you look for BATMAN lmao#and even then they HIGHEST problem is that even when people make more content centering the woc poc and yes even WW it still doesn’t get any#traction bc y’all haven’t unpacked as much of ur racism and misogyny as u think u have#making hcs about tim being a Barbie and Jason being a feminist and dick painting his nails is not progressive when Steph and cass are#cardboard cutouts or the vehicles through which the white men discover feminity is ok actually and nothing else#and then Duke and Damian are the token straights or allies. like y’all are so sick lmao
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i won’t apologize for being a hater. seeing comments on chappell roans posts about being too hypersexual and needing to dial it down (mmm dial what down. say it very explicitly to me. what is making you uncomfortable in your own very clear words) and directly contrasting it with renee rapp just made me not like that girl even more i’m sorry! maybe she should try not being an annoying blonde bi girl who only seems to hang out with other blonde bi girls making mediocre pop. whoops
#is my opinion on her subject to change sure maybe and if you like her by all means don’t let me being mean take that away from you#but that was just. the quiet part out loud. renee is accessible and still not so visibly overtly queer but enough to be like#Tehe girls are sooo pretty#and um cater to that sort of crowd. chappell you have to love and celebrate and embrace queerness wholeheartedly#it’s making me sooooo mad like chappells music is so representative of the fun flirty ways EYE like to express myself#and has made me feel comfortable in that literal sexuality part of my sexuality. and ur gonna sit here and put her down in favor of…#i can’t like i can’t i’m sorry i want to watch that show and you know how much i want to support women and queer women specifically#so yeah again i’d keep my mouth shut in the general public but that fucking brand of sapphic queer Will Not Say The Word Lesbian vibe of#person. i can’t stand you.#you are a traitor to dykes everywhere and you need to do a lot of work. not saying that’s all her fans but WHATEVER i’m not qualifying my#stupid complaining right now it’s my blog#abby talks#this is giving smith college problem and i accept that#and general blanket apology for comparing two queer things when u know there r so many more serious issues in the world#however i’m here to complain about whatever the hell is annoying me. so.
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feeling like a total asshole today 👍
#an aunt's mom passed away yesterday night#i didn't really know her that much just spoke to her a few times for the typical merry christmas & happy new year you know#so when my mom told me i felt bad for my aunt bc i knew they were really close but i don't feel SAD#but my parents seemed to be like so shocked and sad and my little brother even started crying#and i felt absolutely nothing#idek what my mom saw in my face but she went like 'don't you feel anything?' and like wtf am i supposed to feel#like. i'm sorry for my aunt and everything but i just?????#that already made me feel like an absolute asshole but now we have to go there (like 2hours away by car)#and because i am an adult now i *have* to go to the funeral home (?) today and to the funeral tomorrow#and i REALLY don't want to and thought it's making me so fucking anxious bc i haven't been there since my grandma passed away 2 years ago#i really don't want that feeling that i felt back then to come back#not right now#not when i've been starting to feel a bit better this past week#but i'm already failing at that because they started to come back the moment i was told i have to go#and i feel like a fucking asshole because my aunt's mom literally passed away and she (and her whole family) must be heartbroken right now#and all i can think about is that i'm anxious#i'm anxious to go back there. i'm anxious just thinking that i'll have to express my condolences to people that i don't even know#i'm anxious because i'll have to TALK to people and at least try to look a bit SAD but i can't just fake it#bc if i don't look sad my brain tells me that i'm an asshole that doesn't have feelings like apparently everyone around me has#but if i fake it my brain tells me that i'm an asshole bc why tf do i have to fake my fucking personality#why can't i just express my fucking feelings like normal people do and the only thing that i know how to do is fucking complain#like. i know i rant a lot here but it's literally the only place where i talk about my feelings#i NEVER talk about my feelings with anyone because idk HOW to do it#i have like a million things in my mind that i want to tell my mom or my therapy for example but when i finally convince myself to do it#i just CAN'T. the thoughts won't leave my mouth because i don't know how to phrase them properly#so nothing ever leaves my mind unless i make a post here bc apparently writing my thoughts in english (my 2nd language)#is easier than talking in spanish#and at least if i write them here they don't just stay bottled up in my mind#but i'm too tired of myself and my stupid brain that tells me that i do everything wrong :/#i'm gonna shut up now bc i once again reached the tag limit
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Oblivion did such a great job with its UI, the choice of fonts was phenomenal, the constant presence of kingthings petrock as subtitles and as the player's journal evoking medieval books, the quest updates framed with floral ornaments that look right out of manuscripts, the little icons tied to specific quests and questlines and the different crests that appear in your log to signify your rank in different factions
#tes#oblivion#litchi.txt#sorry I got hit in the feels with this stuff#Im a sucker for the borders drawn in medieval manuscripts and I really love the use of those during the quests#plus the little illustrations that we get for Everything#quests factions birth sign EVERYTHING#dont get me started on the illustrations that appear Once when you are choosing your class like they didnt have to design all those#for one throwaway moment in the start#but they included it!! because its such an important moment#Im also just a sucker for anything related to fonts that look like schwabacher#I should just set my computer's default font to kingthings petrock at this point its such a nice font#i hope tes6 takes notes and brings this back I think it would look nice#the whole game has a very medieval story vibe and I know this is such a stupid thing to say#but yeah it just feels like looking thru a manuscript or at gothic church frescos#its like the manuscripts came alive#writing this also made me realise that this is something arena and daggerfall did less successfully because of the hardware limitations#and now Im emotional cause oblivion despite all the flaws and things people keep complaining about is SUCH a love letter to the franchise#I could make a whole post on that too. but oblivion is a love letter to arena and daggerfall change my mind
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hm.
#how do i tell my sister that while i appreciate the thought it is in fact not nicer if she takes the couch occasionally and lets me have my#room sometimes. first of all i HATE disruptions like this it's kind of even more distressing 2 be able 2 sleep in#my own room for one night and then i can't again!!! that sucks net zero!!! second of all She Has My Quilt.... trying very hard 2 be normal#and chill about this and not like it's one of the few things i really really really hate other people using & causes me distress etc.#also like i explicitly said 'hey haha don't do this please' & then she did anyway. which she does!!! i forgot about that!!!#also like man i dont fucking want to sleep on someone's used sheets & blankets that's gross. so im arguably less cosy than i would be. gggh#this all seems like.... very minor and stupid im sure however man im like constantly in a state of middling to severe distress over this#shit. because i in fact also hate people going through my shit or being in my room and also having no privacy however#im very good with suppressing and or masking how much i hate it usually!!!!! but dude she fucking hung her laundry & underclothes#to dry or air on top of my fucking books on my shelves. like. ghghhh hate it hate it cant SAY i hate it because of the everything!!!#ok. sorry. minor pressure cooker escape valve complaining over now im gonna go sleep awkwardly on top of the blankets on my own bed with#some throw blankets. leaving my door open for the beafts if she closes it in the morning bc she thinks she knows what i want ill scream.#txt#neg#this is like private kvetching btw ok i love her dearly it's just unbelievably frustrating.
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this all happening at the same time as i go through the most disgusting drawn out overdue breakup of my life is unfair. i feel insane
#i can't even think about or process the breakup thing because it just seems so stupid and small in the face of everyone else#but i am losing the person who means the most to me and when i can think again ill hate myself#i know im being a shit partner to him and that he deserves better#but i dont know what to. do#or how to fix it#and i cant think about my own stupid relationship shit and take myself seriously when whole familys are being wiped off the map#it feels gross to even complain about it#but god. how will i exist now? how do i be? i have never felt so alone#i miss him#<- isaac being emo abt his (ex?) boyfriend part 99937/?#sorry guys
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just applied for the job i had during college and honestly it feels bad man
everyone I know is actually accomplishing things with their life, buying property, getting promotions, getting their masters etc
fuck, even my cousin who is several years younger than me and has very little to no college (aka doesn’t have student loan debt) just got a management position at a fortune 100 company and is now making more than 60k
And where am I now?
Couldn’t do my job at the big company I was supposed to work at, where I had insurance and got paid enough to actually pay for things
all I do now is feeding horses and basically just putting them in different places 4 hours a day 6 days a week for less than what I made ever since I started working and living off that and what’s left of what I had accumulated in my 401k at my old job (that im gonna have to pay thousands of taxes on for taking it out too early im sure) and therefore fucking myself over for the future- everyone always says start young well I did and I’m too fucking useless to function without wanting to remove my skin apparently so I fucked that up
And yeah it was just an online application so I don’t know how likely it is they’ll even respond and hire me again but I feel like I am going backwards
I did what everybody always insisted I had to do
i went to college
i got a “real” (office) job
i got more than 25k student loan debt I have not been able to make even a dent in
and what do i have to show for it? even worse mental illness? A piece of paper that said i went to college? Crippling fear of answering a phone? an extreme hate for the way I look now?
and now im (at least attempting) to go back to where I was before all that bc that’s the only place i can think of will hire me, to a job I did not enjoy whatsoever, where I am going to have to explain to the high schoolers that would be working closing shift that I will have to do after the morning job like yeah i left here 3 years ago for a competitive job that paid twice as much at one of the (apparently voted) best employers in the city that everyone wants to work for but I threw it all away bc im a useless fucking idiot and now I’m back here working fast food watching all these people who will go to school and get the jobs they want and not fuck it up and actually be successful and move on with their lives
it just,,, it doesn’t feel good
i feel like I’ll never get anywhere so what’s even the point
#and I know you’re probably thinking oh well you have horses you must have plenty of money etc#thing is i work at the place i keep them i do not pay regular price or I would not afford them at all#I’ve only ended up with as many as i have bc at my old#job i made just enough to not be negative every month#and now I can’t get rid of them because I am afraid to talk to people and ended up very attached to one we got with the intention to sell#after a few months#and the other we have had for 10 years now but she would need to be consigned somewhere to get what she’s worth#which requires /talking to people/#so while I previously could just about afford them I can’t now unless something majorly changes#once i run out of what’s left of my 401k i will not have the money to pay for them#yes i know buying ghost tickets with that was an idiotic thing to do but it temporarily made me happy#which is also another reason i want to try to avoid getting rid of the horses if at all possible#sounds stupid but at this point without them there would really be no point in being here#they’re the only reason I talk to anybody at all these days and they are capable of making me happy#im sorry i feel like i have been complaining on here a lot more frequently lately and i don’t think anybody wants to see shit like this on#their dash but i don’t really have anywhere else to say things#anybody irl always just says ‘well other people did x/it was your decision to y/etc#the shitty insurance I have now does not cover anxiety/depression things I have not been taking any and I have a feeling it is not helping#delete later
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I am so fucking sick of these stupid arguments. People know bootstrap idealolgy is garbage until its time to own the tech bros or whatever about art and all of the sudden its STOP MAKING EXCUSES!!! Like fuck you people. I dont even agree with the OP being quote retweeted here but suddenly everybodys a small business owner talking about how you can do anything you want if you just knuckle down and WORK when it comes to art when you know damn well thats not how reality works. Fucking assholes
#reblogs off I am just like incredibly mad#I think Ive talked about this before fun fact about me I have tendonitis and at one point it was so bad I couldnt draw for a year#so like I already disagree with the whole 'we were impoverished and I MADE IT WORK' argument but also#thats why I get mad when people do the whole oggghh you can still make art if you cant use your hands! thing#because sure but pretty much any kind of visual art is a huge pain in the ass if you cant use your hands.#like I'd argue any kind of art honestly. I couldnt even type or anything for long periods of time#like nothings impossible but talking down to disabled people like they dont know their own limits and shit#I dunno sorry I know I complain about people being stupid about this shit alot now its just like#now that everybody thinks they have to worry about the robots taking their jobs alot of artists are showing their asses.#again fucking small business owner ass mindset.#I wasnt gonna post this but I keep seeing this take over and over and feel like i have to
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not ready to go back to work tomorrow but luckily im so not ready that my brain isn't letting it fully process and so im just kind of numb except for little moments when the panic breaks through again
#feeling more and more like a robot and less and less like a person the emptier my life gets#the future is so empty like its just work and isolation forever#i have one thing left at the end of this week and then after that its just work and family and alone#and i think numbing out completely is really the only way ill be able to cope at all#i didnt used to really be able to do that but maybe now im to the point where i just have to so its become an option#idk i also might just be lying to myself and be about to get hit really hard with how bad this all is tomorrow#job interview friday. but plausibly i dont think i can take the job even if i get it bc i just dont think i can move to nyc#i just feel like ive hit a dead end#like i was a side character in someone elses story and that person has moved on so im just like floating in stasis#bc my part of the story is over i wrote myself out of their lives so i don't really exist anymore#idk my brain is telling me all these things that i know are silly but feel so true and i just am tired and empty#sorry to be dramatic and complain again just dreading work so bad#i just dont see any path forward thats not this forever loop like i cant make or have real connections with other ppl#and thats whats supposed to make a life real and worth living#but ive never had the capacity to connect right and ive never had passion for anything and ive never been able to really love and be loved#and i dont know how to fix any of it bc honestly i dont think any of its fixable#ill always be an emotionally harmful drain on anyone i think i love and ill always be left when they realize that#and then ive just hurt another person and i dont want to be a person that just hurts people so i cant be around people anymore#but its so empty and its so lonely and i hate myself so fucking much#anyway. i sound like a pathetic whiny teenager lmao sorry i know how stupid it all is i promise
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Some people will log on to tumblr dot hell and then just post the stupidest possible things about Gale in the most disingenuous way they possibly could.
#tbd#fandom wank#by y'all i mean once again gale antis who pretend to like him#**by some people#like with my own two eyes i have to read the most disingenuous takes from people who are unfathomably stupid#someone really said that gale disapproves of saving the vampire from the vampire hunter like#have u been smoking crack since kindergarten#like are you disingenuous and malicious or are you just really that fucking stupid#i'm sorry but gale's the only one who sees the vampire for what he is and still wouldn't approve of throwing him to the wolves#he tells you as much if you do give the vampire to gandrel but you know he uses big kid words?? so maybe you need a dictionary on hand.#that's gale he's a good person#it doesn't matter if you're a goblin he's going to think shooting an unarmed prisoner is wrong#y'all will complain about 'moral longevity of a mayfly' like you don't say the exact same things about the vampire lol#less poetically but you know#(also he's right)#just say you don't like gale and go without MAKING UP THE MOST BLATANT LIES ABOUT HIM
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