#so that i can throw it into the void of tumblr
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ML Fanworks
An archive my Miraculous Ladybug fanfics, because 1) I like pretty things, 2) I'm just That Kinda Guy, 3) "it is always morally correct to bump your own content", and 4) one post is easier to keep track of than 63894.
Caught (AO3 Link)
Rated M | Complete: Oneshot | 13K Words
Prominent Ships: FeLuka (Endgame), Lukanette (Friendship)
*S5 Emotion Spoilers*
Luka grins widely, hand catching a street pole just to swing around it. Satisfaction blooms in his chest when Félix stops to appraise him with a raised eyebrow and a sly smile. Luka reaches out with his other hand, tapping a finger on the hard cover wrapped in leather and stamped with gold leaf. "Sure does have a much prettier cover."
Félix lifts it a bit higher, nearer to his shoulder. "And deadly--don't forget," he says with half-predatory delight, almost like a threat.
A teasing threat, Luka hopes, one meant to elicit his carefree laugh rather than something very real--something that might beat him over the head if he doesn’t move out of the way fast enough.
The Pirate Queen's Son (AO3 Link)
Rated M | Ongoing: Latest Chapter | 8.6K Words
Prominent Ships: FeLuka (Endgame)
Félix doesn't need to further clarify which one she's referencing. Of course it's him, the one dressed in a black leather jacket accented with dark scales, the snake bravely emblazoned on the back (the cherry on top of what had given Luka away). Cerulean eyes hiding behind dark azure hair scan the crowd as he leaves the stage, inspecting everything and seeing nothing. He's in a world of his own.
Luka Couffaine, son of the Pirate Queen and the most trusted of her secret band of criminals, is the one person with a Miraculous that might stop Félix from getting what he wants. None of the rest are as clever, as vexing, as the man disappearing out of sight.
See This Chance (AO3 Link)
Rated G | Complete | 4K Words
Prominent Ships: FeLuka (Endgame)
Luka died in 2016. Yep. Crushed by the Arc de Triumph when Mayura’s Robustus slammed into it. It was kind of a big deal, but once you’re dead, you’re dead—especially when there’s no Lucky Charm to bring you back.
Luka’s been dealing with it in the typical ways.
Sunset Palette (AO3 Link)
Rated G | Complete: Oneshot | 5K Words
Prominent Ships: FeLuka (Endgame)
Félix straightened, denying Luka any further honest investigation with the guile of a charismatic banker. "A trade," he said, "if you are truly looking to get the Miraculous back, it's one you'll take me up on." He lifted his hand from the tabletop, frowning at the sawdust and grime that returned while he tried to rub it away between his fingers. Félix looked up at him after, still framed by that picture window and blindingly bright golden butterscotch leaves, one eyebrow arched. "An identity for a jewel."
In The Shadows (AO3 Link)
Rated T | Complete: Boomer!Luka Series | 120K Words
Prominent Ships: Lukanette (Endgame, fluffy), FeLuka (Not endgame in this work, one-sided and angsty)
It starts sweet. Blue eyes draw me in like a siren’s call, soft lips speak my name and it sounds like there’s a ring to it even when my lungs are burning and I’m left drowning. There’s a song in your body, it moves like shadows and sunlight, Eros and Apollo laboring in tandem for one holy purpose, to mold your body and soul and make it soft and hard in all the right places, till I’m left gasping for you.
World's Not Our Own (AO3 Link)
Rated T | Complete: Boomer!Luka Series | 88K Words
Prominent Ships: FeLuka (Not endgame, moving toward friendship, still one-sided and angsty), Luka & Alix (Friendship), Lukanette (Endgame, fluffy)
It is now, standing in the pit made from the maw of the monster in his arms, that he can finally accept what has been happening to him these past few months without hating it. It is much like twilight, something that should signify an end, but for whatever reason, feels more like acceptance and rebirth than dawn ever did. He is changing, growing, expanding beyond his limits, and every minute is a new picture, all of his contradictions spilling out next to each other, shifting across the sky like one might mix paint. The same night never comes twice, and when he looks up, he sees thousands of stars, all the light from all the suns that feel like eyes in the sky, watching him to see what he'll do.
New Beat (AO3 Link)
Rated T | Complete: Boomer!Luka Series | 42K Words
Prominent Ships: Adrinette (Friendship), Aligami (Friendship/It's Complicated But Delicious), Adrien & OC (Friendship/Eventual Pairing)
Marinette sat beside him on the rooftop, staring out into the night sky. He didn't know what to say, so he said nothing at all. Marinette was the first to speak.
"I guess I never really knew you," she said softly, staring at her hands curled in her lap.
Those words were the ones that cut him the most. How many times had he wanted her to know exactly who he was? To see the real him, the one beneath the surface? But Ladybug had never loved Chat Noir. She had loved Adrien, the façade he put on. "No," he said, no malice in his voice, "I guess not."
The Way I Love You (AO3 Link)
Rated T | Complete: Boomer!Luka Series | 3K Words
Prominent Ships: FeLuka
Because Luka is a friend. No. He truly is a friend. He has to be. The alternative is that Luka is nothing to him, and Félix can't bear that. He'll take this instead. However he can belong to Luka, he'll take it—Félix is horrifically selfish and knows it; he's a ball of contradictions wound so tightly together they all run into each other, where want and need and fear and loathing and longing all mingle at home in his head and heart, and Luka simply…holds out his hands. Accepts it.
The Night We Met (AO3 Link)
Rated M | Complete: Boomer!Luka Series | 15K Words
Prominent Ships: FeLuka (Endgame), Luka & Alix (Friendship)
Félix was still a Pandora's box of contradictions.
"I haven't forgotten," Luka said, tilting his head to fruitlessly try to steal back Félix's eyes, to draw them back to his face. It didn't work, but he kept talking anyway. "What you asked me--the night we fought."
It had been impossible to forget, because the question had constantly hunted him, always looming in the back of Luka's mind. He could have recited it by heart, but by the deliberately blank stare on Félix's face and the way he clenched his fists, he knew Félix remembered too.
Anarka, Meet Jagged (AO3 Link)
Rated M | Complete: Oneshot | 1K Words
Prominent Ships: Anarka/Jagged (We all know how that ended up)
"I mean, there's always the Raincomprix kid, right?" Fester's feet were straight in the air, resting against the back of the ratty ass couch in his garage; his mohawk grazed the concrete from where his head was hung off the seat. He had a jar of imported cheese puffs in hand, shoveling them in his mouth with big handfuls, and a couple fell out between his fingers and rolled underneath the drum set that they had somehow managed to make fit around Fester's dad's golf kit and tool chests.
Anarka stared at him, mouth agape. "…Are you fucking kidding me?"
Patient (AO3 Link)
Rated G | Complete: Oneshot | 2K Words
Prominent Ships: Lukanette
"I'm sorry I wasn't there," Ladybug said softly. She'd pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on her forearms. The reminders of her failure to Paris were everywhere she looked; rubble on the sides of the roads, knocked-over buildings, and, more importantly—the people who had gotten hurt in the crossfire. Seeing it when she got back had hit her like a ton of bricks. Finding out that Luka was one of the people that had been hurt? That had hit her worse.
#Nat's Monster in the Box#FeLuka#Lukanette#Time twins#Aligami#Anarka/Jagged#i need a new pinned post#this is convenient AND new works can replace the one up top#so that i can throw it into the void of tumblr#its a win win win for me#miraculous ladybug#zolila
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kind of obvious maybe at least to me that sun was my favorite & so i knew exactly what kind of characterization i wanted to see more of from him (and how i should write him or whatever) so ive Struggled w characterizing moon a Ton BUT ..... i think i know now . ohhoh
#talking#// im complaining a shit ton after this tag just ignore it#if i can stop having my brain yell at me for not drawing good for like an hour i would be SET to draw a comic.#need to get in the zone again where im not expecting anyone to see my art so it doesnt have to be good and so i can just write whatever#without censoring it/worrying over if people will like it#<- debating cutting down on my tumblr activity a ton bc of this#like popping in rbing a few things every few days and then leaving#bc tbh i already deleted the mobile app and its doing wonders for my brain. no notifs nothing to click on just me and my mentally ill mind#<- pls dont send anything about/comment on this btw this is just me throwing my thoughts out into the void
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maybe i should remake
#this blog is so cluttered#i don't have a tagging system so i'm just throwing everything into a void#also i feel like i can't post/reblog fandom stuff to here for some reason#but like. who the hell wants to make a new tumblr in 2024 lol#we'll see#wait you can talk?
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alhaitham and dehya are FRIENDS they are friends THEY ARE FRIENDS they are besties they are F R I E N D S this Is the hill i Will die on
#none of u guys understand them like i do (lamenting)#desert gang you will always be fucking famous to meeeee#emotionally i am perpetually living in the sumeru archon quest#i have Lots Of Fucking Thoughts about it and them#anyway these are the hills i will die on: 1. alhaitham and dehya are best* fucking friends (*best here w an asterisk bc dehya has many#friends bc she is a very charming and likeable woman w myriad good qualities and alhaitham is not those things (i hate him) (affectionate)#so obviously dehya doesnt need some weirdo scholar to be her best friend but they are still very special friends bc they are v special to ME#(slight tangent but god i just have so much fucking brainrot abt the sumeru charas i have So Many Thoughts please you dont understand im dyi#dying#dont even get me started on nilou nilou is fucking wonderful and amazing and perfect this is another hill i will die on i am a#nilou defender forever and ever#aNYWAY im getting fucking sidetracked but im rambing word vomit nonsense in the tags of my tumblr dot com bc its the wee hours of morning an#and i have a problem and that problem is called i am very not normal about these stupid fucking characters and ANYWAY to finally continue my#list from like ten tags ago#the other hill i will die on is 2. signora deserved better LMAOOO#my other ~~problem~~ superpower is i can make anything abt the fatui harbingers /incurs smirks#alright ill stop my yapping lololol just throwing my thoughts out into the void like woe brainrot be upon ye#.txt
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i’m so into dndads rn i might make a separate blog just so i can RB everything i see
#i might include dimension 20 stuff in it too because i'm just so insane about those two things rn#sometimes i think about keeping this blog tidy but then i see a funny little post with my funny little guys and i think 'ok well people can#just scroll a little farther to find my art'#it's not like i post my art on here very often anyway#but i post the most of it on here out of all of the socials that im on#anyway i've suddenly become aware of the fact that i don't really talk to my mutuals and i'm kind of really sad about it#i want to have friends and be able to talk to people w#ith mutual interests because i love people so much and i love talking and i have so many thoughts in my brain about the things i like that#i can't keep in#i dont put a lot of effort into curating this blog at all but im wondering if a second one would be too much energy#idk ill figure it out LMFAO#i mostly use tumblr to throw ideas and art and stuff into the void and hope that people like it#but maybe it would be nice to have some place to save all the dnd posts to look back at#anyway this is just me thinking#if we're mutuals hi i want to be freinds with u but im shy pls talk to me about anything if u want#and if we're not mutuals hi i want to be friends with u but im shy pls talk to me about anything if u want
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You can tell how well I'm handling ao3 being down by the fact that I've been tweeting from 2 different accounts for a good chunk of the night
#its all podcast promotion (mine and other podcasts)#but still#i need ao3 to come back so i can get off twitter#the ao3 volunteers trying to get the site back up deserve the WORLD#pine throws thoughts into the void of tumblr
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i’m gonna do some blog maintenance tonight so please ignore me until i’m done <333
#kai.blog#patiently waiting until the majority of y’all are asleep so i can start#cus by morning the dash has already swallowed the posts and y’all don’t have to see me embarrass myself when tumblr decides to play with me#by not showing whatever images i use to force me to use my computer :(#also i’m just gonna throw this into the void rn#i am beyond jealous of the ppl that know how to code cus i looked up a tutorial to make some of those aesthetic themes#AND THEY PULLED OUT CODING AND SHIT#HUHHH?!?#DO I LOOK LIKE I CAN DO THAT SHIT NAHHH#sooo we are gonna do our best with whatever templates canva provides me :)
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ok reading back my old personal posts and despite everything i am doing WAY better than i was even a year ago
i'm going to pat myself on the back just a teeny tiny bit
#growth may not be linear but it is very real!#i'm glad i throw my thoughts into the tumblr void so i can look back on them like this!#a's personal for ts
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Watching Dying Light 2 in the background while I'm drawing and this has to be one of the creatively devoid games I've ever seen. If you could take "made to please execs and the vague, unspecific concept of white gamer bro" you'd just have this game.
#txt#there is nowhere else relevant i can express this opinion so tumblr gets it#throws thoughts into the void
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Me and a close friend have a headcanon that in the unsundered world, marriage involved carving out a piece of your own soul and giving it to the other
We mostly do this so that we can have cute AUs where the unsundered meet a shard of their loved one and then feel an instant pull to them and know "that's my spouse!! :("
But it's a really cute idea in general and it makes me very happy 😌
Elidibus always ends up needing to get rid of the pesky warruor of light in our AUs and he sees her and is always just.. "FUCK THATS MY WIFE"
#endwalker#endwalker spoilers#personal#im just rambling#my favorite thing about tumblr so far is that i can just throw my thoughts into the void
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Uhhh so here's a snippet from that caleb widogast fic i'm writing.
Tw: descriptions of self injuries, self-loathing
Stay safe <3
A towel trailing behind her, Nott hops up onto the bench in front of him and pushes her dark hair out of her eyes. “Caleb?”
“Ja.” He focuses on her face, familiar and grounding.
You don’t have to,” she says. “I have enough coin for a private bath.”
He shakes his head. No sense in wasting gold on a secret he had failed to keep. “I— I don’t know why I’m still… They know. There’s no point in…”
“There’s nothing wrong with a bit of privacy,” Nott insists.
He bites his cheek. “The bath salts— they sting.”
He dug the gouges into his body, tore flesh from his arms; he did this to himself, consequences be damned. And now, he couldn't face them. A little bit of soap was too much. Hurt too bad.
Her eyes widen, and he watches as the last few days slot into place.
"You relapsed."
“Ja.” His gaze darts away, nails pressing against his palms.
"Did you take care of them?"
He thinks of the puffy red skin meeting the scabs, the thin ghastly yellow puss starting to crust up over the worst of them. He thinks of the sickening split and the resulting sludge of blood when the inflamed skin burst.
His jaw works. "Nein." The word scrapes against the back of his throat.
#caleb widogast#nott the brave#critical role#mighty nein#this is me trying to get better at sharing my work#i have one fear and it is being perceived#posting on tumblr is a little like throwing something into the void so it is slightly easier knowing it will be forgotten in a few days#also if i tag this with the triggers it wont show up in the search so thats why they are tagged in the post#and its under a read more#i used the word relapse on purpose due to its specific connotations#i highly doubt they have that word#but tbh if you have ever heard that word applied to yourself you know what a gut punch it can be#and caleb is definitely feeling that#so anyway your body is you and someone loving you is loving your body#dont worry nott takes care of him#i just havent written that bit because its tricky#this is the third thing ive posted on tumblr#go me#maybe i should start a tag for my writing#hmmmm
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I LOVE HOW YOU TAG PARAGRAPHS THEYRE FUN TO READ!! /gen
Thank you!!! I love to ramble!!!
#i'm so wordy. i am SO wordy. i never ever fail at a minimum word requirement#but oh god the second my uni says no MORE than 2000 words i freak out. what do you mean no more than 2000 words. does less than 2000 words#and tumblr not yelling at me about tag length even exist?#is it possible to not type out an entire paragraph when i have even a single thought? do people really go around with one word sentences in#side their heads all day? do you see a cool thing and go oh cool thing! and move on#instead of oh cool thing! this reminds me of my very specific brainrot!#which is to say chronic inability to shut the fuck up#so i'm glad. you are entertained lmao#that's all i intend! i'm literally blogging tumblr is a blogging platform. the point is to put my thoughts out there! throw them out! into#the void! the dark abyss (i use the goth rave dashboard theme so this is literal) and hope#just hope i get like a call back. a little nod. and i got one <3 thank you <3#also (genuinely) i'm assuming /gen means /genuine but like it could also mean /general or some kind of acronym like pos (piece of shit) so.#am i right? im not. up to date. the last time#i paid attention to txt spk and it's ilk was like 2015#i make assumptions but i am Often Wrong (i still don't know what tfw stands for my brain just goes 'time for when' and it's like 'yeah that#sounds legit' and i'm like 'what the fuck are you talking about? time for when? that doesn't even make sense.#why do you think that sounds legit?'#but i'm asking myself that question so i dont' get an aswer. ah well#you can tell i should be sleeping rn. i get even more verbose and use words like ilk when i'm tired. hence: sleep time now yes.#but again; for real all jokes and minor japes aside: thanks! i'm glad i'm really not just shouting into the void for nobody to hear here.
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What do you consider to be a middle class salary and amiddle class life in 2023? Is class related to income or is it on birth/accent/last name in your opinion?
I'm not entirely sure buddy, depends on where you live because cost of living is different everywhere. I would assume its enough to cover rent in a safe enough area, food, transportation to work, and enough extra to bring home for retirement and at least a little tiny bit of recreation like trips/ hobbies. I'd say 60K might do it in my area, but in places like LA or NYC you might need more because its so expensive there. A middle class life is different for everyone, we all have different ideals on what a normal/ average life is. Mine is to be able to cover my basic needs food/shelter/health/transportation, be saving enough to retire at a normal age ~65, with the added ability to put like at least 100$ aside a month for fun things like trips, games, a new sketchbook, classes, a boba tea or 2. It would be an added lovely bonus if my work would allow for me to not be severely hurt by retirement because of the labour i put in, but if thats what it takes for me to be able to live comfortably while im young i would work anyway.
That second question is one I'm super not qualified to answer. I'm an artist by study, and a retail worker by practice. I don't know a lot about or have thought about that very much. My opinion is subject to change with the information i learn because right now i am very ignorant. This is my uninformed ignorant opinion:
Personally when saying something like "middle class" in the context of I live in America and this is how i have seen it used. It usually is not showcasing your ancestry, but the actual money you take home from work. slightly dependent on the amount of expenses you have, through choice or obligation. I can also see the other side though, I think there becomes a point in which your influence in a field or just life can let you ensure your children have a place somewhere where they will also carry that influence/automatically get things that others struggle hard for but will never obtain. (like a big house, career path opportunity, or just money in general) I can also see that if you grew up in a family who launched you into debt, caused an addiction, or started you off in life poorly "working hard" still might never get you out of the hole thats been dug. But when i think classes in 2023 im thinking this person has X amount of money after basic expenses and X amount of expensive recreation (boats, summer home, huge house, fancy car, ect) Not this person is middle class because their mother and father were middle class, which i am living proof that that is not always the case. Theres also tons of other factors that go into your ability to make money or get a job that may or may not play a part in your ancestry, but like,,, I dont study this kind of thing and I'm poor so my only resource is the free part of the internet (people would tell lies on the internet!!!???) and my own life experience. So I dont know and i might never know because this is def more complex of a topic in reality than what i mean with my own words ^^;
#welp this is long and a heavy topic#sorry if im wrong? you can tell me if im like totally wrong here but please be nice#im stupid and i get where this post came from because i complain about wanting a better job fairly often#but im still curious who sent this >>; my complainy posts get like 0 attention i didnt think people really read them#if theyre annoying just tell me to stop ^^; im cursed to have a strict $60 or less a week food budget and it makes me curse capitalism#a little grumpy because i can only afford 1 1/2 meals a day a little paranoid because i cant afford my own rent#and i dont have a tharapist so i throw it to the open void i THINK tumblr is when actually people are listening oops >>; sorry
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In case you were wondering how deep down the Batfam fixation hole I am, it's something I've actually been talking about in therapy a lot.
Not like, in a worried way, more just when my therapist asks me what I'm doing in my downtime, my answer always used to be either "sleeping" or "I don't have downtime. I have too much work to do."
Now my answer is "playing my Batman game" or "watching Batman show/reading comics/writing unhinged Batman x Muppet fanfic."
And my therapist is delighted. She's fucking ecstatic. She's like, "You have interests again!" and I'm like !!!! Because here's the thing.
Almost dying in 2019 kinda irrevocably fucked up my brain, like, a lot. Like a lot, a lot. And I've been grieving over that for the last few years as well as recovering from the physical aspects of it. And to cope with it, I threw myself into work even though I wasn't physically or mentally well enough, and that made everything worse, and well, if you've been here, you know.
My brain has not been kind to me for a long time. It still isn't. But I do the work. I do multiple types of therapy a week. I piece myself back together on the daily and try to remember what it means to be human and not just this numb static void that sometimes sounds like shrieking if you listen too closely.
And then randomly, a few months ago a friend bought me Gotham Knights on Steam, and it was like a light turned back on. The engine that'd been refusing to turn over for years suddenly sputtered back to life, and something in my brain went, "Hey, I remember this... this is fun?"
And then I started tentatively searching the tags here on Tumblr, and yeah, actually. I remember this. I remember enjoying this. I can dip my toes into this. This is safe. This is a childhood interest from Before the almost-dying-trauma. And besides, it won't get in the way of my work. This isn't going to consume me. Nothing consumes me like it used to. I'm too broken for that.
Except, haha, jokes on me because, for some fucking reason, Brucie fucking Wayne and his gaggle of chaotic crime-fighting children is what reached into my brain, picked up my trauma, and started shaking it loose like a category 7 earthquake.
I actually laughed about that with my therapist a few weeks ago. Of all characters, of all pieces of media, it's Batman that's helping me process a significant chunk of my emotional trauma in a healthy way.
The most emotionally constipated vigilante in superhero existence, and I'm weeping like a child every time I get an achievement in Gotham Knights, and it says some bullshit like this:
ID: a purple steam achievement icon that says: He'd Be So Proud Of You. Reach the maximum level as any member of the Batman Family. 6.3% of players have this achievement. /end ID.
(for context, Batman is dead in this game, and you are playing as his emotionally devastated children trying to keep it together. Wailing, gnashing, crying, throwing up etc, etc.)
And my therapist, who has sat with me through EMDR sessions and a multitude of other shit designed to rewire your brain, just shrugs and says, "Sometimes we need to externalize our emotions through safe media. For you, right now, that safety is Batman having a relationship with the Muppets."
And like... okay, yeah. I'll take the win on that one.
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Boxing class is going well and I know this because my brain has started formulating a combination of punches that I can do to Cha Cha Cha by Käärijä
#thinking about buying a punching bag at home so i can do workouts without going to a whole class#i think this will be good for me#and will also allow me to choreograph punches to my favorite songs#pine throws thoughts into the void of tumblr
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Pfp change go brrrrrr. BIG MOMENT TRULY. HUGE EVEN. A POG MOMENT EVEN
#Dont want to have anything to do with the person who drew the previous one so in the dumpster that pfp goes. Goodbye forever Tub bo drawn#in the 'notes' app at three am#Just wanted to commemorate it with a post idk. It means a lot to me to just throw the old one out the window#Also why am I explaining this is tumblr who cares and this is a side blog specifically for just random bs that comes to mind so why am I#writing this what is this a diary?? Actually this blog can be a diary. Who's gonna stop me from making it a diary? The cringe factor??#I am above it it has no power over me at least untill unreasonable anxiety attack kicks in and I care about words thrown into the void for#some weird reason. Anyway brains are extremely weird and I propose we ban them because they make anxiety go brrr and that makes me sad#Which is such a not pog moment I cant strech it enough so I am feeding my brains to my bff's cat. Senya will love it Im sure of it#or maybe he wont who knows. His choice. I wont make him do things he dont wanna. Dont make pets do things they dont want to
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