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soudakuwunmoment · 7 months

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About Dirk's role in the downfall of DirkJake

I mentioned recently in a post that I don't like DirkJake as much as I used to, and credited that to how Jake treated Dirk before they broke up. I know it's far more popular to say the breakup was Dirk's fault, but I'm here to add my perspective, because I truly don't think this is entirely the case.

Disclaimer, I am BIASED AS SHIT. I LOVE Dirk as a character, I relate to him on many levels, and his breakup with Jake is one of those levels. I was in Dirk's place a few years ago in a near identical situation, with a partner who was dissatisfied with our relationship and refused to tell me, while simultaneously distancing from me in a way which was incredibly unhealthy. I don't hold it against him now, and neither do I hold it against Jake. Both were teenagers. Immature and scared. However, while this gives me bias, I also think it gives me a unique perspective and experience in this exact situation. I think I have a place discussing this.

So, where to start? Well, first of all, let's establish what the issue was and how it led to the breakup.

After the time skip, we see that Jake is frustrated with how clingy and overbearing Dirk is being. He is overwhelmed by the intensity of the relationship, but is too scared to say anything because he doesn't want to upset Dirk or put them on bad terms. After all, Jake DOES love Dirk, despite what many people think. Having issues with your partner does not automatically mean you don't love them. In response to Jake's distant behavior, Dirk tries especially hard to impress him, make him happy. Dirk is anxious; he has been lonely his whole life, and has loved Jake for 3 years at that point. He is finally physically close with someone who he loves and is having his feelings returned. But now he senses that he might lose that. Dirk is VERY proactive about his problems, and is notoriously a chronic overthinker. So, Dirk attempts to "mend" things. He offers adventures and treasure and tombs; Jakes favorite things. Jake doesn't see Dirk's intentions and is oblivious to how anxious he is. He doesn't read behind the lines and therefore comes to the conclusion that Dirk has just been far too clingy lately. And so, we have a vicious situation. Jake's reaction to Dirk's clinginess is to hide, and Dirk's reaction to Jake's distance is to overcompensate and be more affectionate. It's a cycle that only gets worse the longer it's left unchecked.

So how can this be solved? Communication, obviously. It's the key to healthy relationships. I feel very strongly about that.

Both parties could do to communicate their exact thoughts, but in reality, Jake is more at fault. Sure, it would help if Dirk were to express specifically that he is anxious about the relationship and that's why he's being more clingy. But realistically, Does Dirk know that? Is he self aware enough of his actions? He never makes it clear whether he is. And him saying this to Jake, while it would help, it would only get them so far. The responsibility ends up on Jake. After all, Jake is fully aware of the reason for his behavior, we KNOW this. He tells us why he is doing what he's doing. And if he were to express this to Dirk, it would not only soothe his anxiety ("I see, so Jake isn't avoiding me because he doesn't love me/there's something wrong with me") but it would also spark a conversation about what to do about their situation. Perhaps a "I will give you the space you need so long as you don't become too distant/spend time with me" from Dirk, or an "I will spend more time with you so long as you respect my wishes when I wish to be alone" from Jake. But no, they can't have this conversation, specifically because Dirk does not know WHY Jake is becoming distant. Yes, Dirk DOES know Jake wants space. He is aware of this. But he does not know WHY. This is why he is anxious; he thinks it's because of his own personality or because he is a burden or because he is "toxic" as he often describes himself. And as long as Dirk is anxious, he will become "aggressive" in his clinginess. Sure, you could say this is a negative trait of his, but it can be avoided with communication, VERY easily.

You can say the breakup is Dirks fault all you want, and yes, he plays a role. But my opinion is that if either of them were to be considered a victim of the other, Dirk was the one who suffered more as a result of Jake's refusal to communicate.

#homestuck #hs #dirkjake #dirk strider #jake english #this is one hell of a controversial take #but i stand by it with every goddamn cell of my being #which isnt a lot of cells #but its all i got #so its the thought that counts #i think #anyways yeah fuck jake honestly #im projecting i know #but let me have this

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isjasz · 8 months

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[Day 68]

More of the guys + cool glasses poses >:D

#dddaily4sherin #grian #goodtimeswithscar #cuteguy #hotguy #hermitblr #hermitcraft #desert duo #namemc spoilers #my art #the og thought was i wanted to play with glasses + lighting more but i got lazy LMAO #love drawing ppl putting their chins on anothers head its so silly #and i think im getting comfortable with painting :D #THE GUYSSSSSSS #cuteguy existed for a second on hermitcraft im counting that as a win even if it was for decoration HE WAS THERE #also dont think about the day count. oh god its here

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egophiliac · 8 months

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just thinking about hair and faces

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #i don't THINK this counts as face horror but just in case #face horror #for your daily dose of me losing my mind over anime characters #i don't know why the hair thing surprised me so much. i think because i thought it was funny that lilia named silver after his hair color.#like ha ha lilia is hilariously bad at names how cute and silly!#oh. oh it's kind of a Thing.#anyway i am excited to see where the heck all of this stuff with silver's various dads ends up!#we still don't actually know who killed meleanor!#we still don't know literally anything about dad draconia! (dadconia? dradconia?)#we don't know what happened to the macguffin gem with its magical dad-saving powers!#(surely this will not come back to save a certain dad at a later point. of course not.)#man i was not expecting episode 7 to be all dads all the time #i mean i'm here for it but #hey remember when the highest stakes were who was gonna win the big talent show #then robots started kidnapping people and now we've just escalated from there #episode 8 our cat is going to turn into a drippy ink kaiju and we're going to have to mecha battle him to save the world or something #each member of diasomnia pilots a limb and we gattai into a giant robot dragon and hold on i gotta submit this spec script to aniplex brb

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intotheelliwoods · 3 months

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You guys wanted to see some Raph, heres some Raph!

Masterpost

#wuahg #oh I have not drawn in ages #I forgot how to draw hugs!#heres hoping I can get that drawing spark back again!#but oh man the college + work combo has been killing me already haha #2 arms left #rottmnt #rise leo #future leo #rise raph #hamato leonardo #hamato raphael #also this comic ended up #way shorter than I thought it was going to be omg????#what a bitty update-#arguably one of the most bitty updates #this could count as a mini comic its so bitty

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thatnununguy · 20 days

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Yeas, this IS a fairly oddparents au! Don't ask.

#doodle #homestuck #gamzee makara #equius zahhak #caliborn #fairly oddparents #kinda????#its an au so idk if it counts #anyway super old idea i had and thought was funny

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onefey · 1 year

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So, You're The Bad Parent Of A Rival In A Mainline Pokémon Game...

#pokemon #pokemon scarlet and violet #scarvio spoilers #giovanni #ghetsis #lusamine #professor sada #professor turo #ai sada #ai turo #its the morning after i beat violet and i rushed to make this #fey makes a meme #edit: clarifying things ive said in rbs in the tags -#turo and sada were trying to fix things they just thought they needed to achieve their goals to do so #+ this post is tagged as ai sada and ai turo idk what u want from me #and i know absent parents count as abusive ones my point was more that its a different flavor of trauma #anyway havea nice day

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ruporas · 9 months

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all I wanted was to save them... (ID in alt)

#nicholas d wolfwood #trigun #trigun maximum #tw blood #let me know if there's any other tags i need to use!!! not sure if it counts as gore #ruporas art #*vash voice* YOU ARE NOT WRONG/LOST WOLFWOOD!!!!!!#i think very often about ch 49 where wolfwood thought it was fr over for him for that brief moment. he was already bearing with so much #fatigue that it wasn't going to be enough for him to fight back properly.. and ough... augh..... for the first time after bearing that cros #someone saved him. someone saved himmmm AUGHHHH <-- guy who can't be normal about it even though its been 7 months since i read it #but he's suffered alone for so long and continued to do so because it's all he ever knew in those short years #and its devastating. his one and only desire was simple and it was still difficult for him to reach T_T #anyway... i love him... holds him tenderly in my palms

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nevarroes · 3 months

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mornings in the keep

#art tag #art #casim carnarvon #gortcas #I spent so much time w this for no reason just to dislike it ouch💔#its ok its the thought that counts yea....#gortash just wearing his coat will never not be a reoccuring theme 4 me sorry

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puppyeared · 10 months

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personal character design headcanons + brainrot

Note: the re-bound!au does NOT belong to me, it belongs to @chipper-smol I’m just not normal about it lol

#I SAY PERSONAL BC ITS MY OWN SPIN ON IT. NOT CHIPPERS CANON UNLESS THEY DECIDE TO OR NOT YOU HEAR ME /LH #I made a banner and everything this time. PLWEASE send them your questions not me JAJFHDSF #I thought it would be cool if macaque has two separate forms as a shadow and inside a mindscape. like I wanted his shadow form to reflect #him in his prime and then the mindscape form as what he looked like when he died. or a more vulnerable state at least #based on LBD appearing to MK as the ivory lady when she died in the S3 special. I don’t know exactly what it was but my first thought seein #the white void was she was appearing to MK in his mindscape to talk to him. so I built on that #I wanted to give him a more ‘Smokey’ look as a shadow just based on how he manipulates them in the show like in shadow play. I hope this #makes it look cool and immaterial. and then his mindscape form would be more battered up and tangible #the last couple images are chippers ideas though since they said the monkeys are drawn to MK when macaque is possessing him lol #and the fact that macaque doesn’t have any senses unless he’s possessing someone + literally sniffing out wukong in the scroll 🤨📸#I also have a vivid image of macaque moving from the mindscape to physical form like umm. kind of like when he passes the boundary between #physical and spirit/mind(?) it’s like the shadow covers him like ink. or pulling Saran Wrap over your face and it clings to your skin #so it kind of makes the shadow seem like a sort of shell or covering.. and I love the idea of MK meeting macaque in the mindscape for the #first time too. like the moment mac rescues him from LBD and MK sees him all battered and tired looking brooooooo #I’m not even sure if that would count as a mindscape but it rattles around in my brain like loose marbles #god I fucking love this au. gives me imagination fuel swear to god #my art #doodles #lmk #Lego Monkie kid #Monkie kid #lmk au #re-bound!au #rebound au #lmk sun wukong #lmk swk #lmk macaque #lmk six eared macaque #lmk mk #lmk xiaotian

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haunted-xander · 3 months

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I think one of the (several) reason for why Shadowbringers is so good is because the narrative is more about the individual characters than it is the Greater Conflict.

Like, the Greater Conflict is definitely there, obviously, it's what keeps the story going, but the focus is always on the people, much more so than the other expacs. HW and STB also have some level of character focus ofc, but it's very selective and even then the focus is based on them in the specific context of the current conflict.

But in SHB, the story bends around the characters' narratives, rather than the other way around. The story forms to put them in situations that challenges their flaws and limitations, by forcing them to confront it and actually deal with it. Even just at the very beginning, you see the twins being dealt a terrible hand that very neatly clashes against their faults.

Alisaie is confronted with a situation that she can and could never do anything about. She has no means to help the patients (at the time at least). The only way for her to help them is by eradicating the source of the affliction itself: the Light. But the Light isn't just some Big Bad she can kill and be done with. Even when all the lightwardens are down the Light is still there, it's just more manageable. Alisaie learns to not only see the bigger picture, but to care for it for her own reasons. For all that she has participated in Big Operations, it has always been because that's what others were doing, what others cared for to be done. She feels for the people of Doma and Ala Mhigo, but she didn't set out to liberate their homelands because she has any personal investment in it. But other people do, and she cares about what other people- be they strangers or friends- care about.

Caring about other peoples feelings and opinions isn't a flaw by itself of course, but doing things without any sense of personal purpose, is. This is what SHB helps her fix and confront, because it is personal now, she does it because she cares.

Alphinaud is forced into a situation where diplomacy and negotiations does and would never work. He can't talk himself into Eulemore, and he sure as hell can't convince Vauthry or the free citizens to let go of their life of ignorant luxury. The problem here also isn't as straightforward as a corrupt ruler, because even after Vauthry is revealed for the bastard he is, it takes considerable effort and convincing to get them to get off their asses and get to work. It's one thing to change the minds of people who wanted the same outcome just in a different way (like Ishgard- they rejected unity with the dragons, but they still wanted an end to the war), but it's another thing entirely to convince people that another way of life is even worth it.

And this is what SHB teaches Alphinaud, that words and deeds can achieve much, but that there is much more to diplomacy than appealing to their wants and/or sensibilities to convince them of an alternative outcome. His development may not be as immediately noticable as some of the others (largely bc he had a lot of it already from HW), but it is still very much there.

Urianger's development had already been build up and sort-of started already, but we don't really get to see it until it near explodes in his face after we kill Vauthry. Even after he swore off secrecy, he's forced to confront his morals when the Exarch bids his assistance. Urianger has always been looking at the greater picture, to the point he'd almost lose himself in it if it wasn't for the overwhelming guilt he feels. He works with the Exarch, because he knows he's the only one capable of it, and he hates the very fact that he is. When the climax of the plan is about to be executed, he is pained to the point that even he can't mask it anymore. He has betrayed their trust once more and once more it will result in the death of a friend.

But it doesn't, and that's what's needed for him to confront himself. As terrible and unexpected as the circumstances around it was, it did show him that there are other ways. There is no one way to solve a problem, the first choice doesn't need to be the only one. And he would find those other ones of he had just talked to the others.

The pay-off doesn't quite come until EW, where we see him actively make the choice to go against his first instinct of acquiesing to the Loporrits' plans, and instead chooses to consult us, but that scene wouldn't have made sense or even happened had it not been for his development in SHB.

Now, Y'shtola is a bit of an odd one because while she does get her due focus, she doesn't quite get the same amount of development as the others. Rather, it shows how she thrives when not held back by others interests and (often somewhat needless) bounderies. Her intelligence and charisma have the chance to shine, her independence and confidence now rewarded rather than punished. In ARR, she is constantly annoyed by the Maelstroms way of dealing with things, and how no one bothers to actually listen to her. Her advice and reprimands are almost entirely ignored until the problem blows up in their faces and they have no choice but to concede that she was right.

Being independent and confident aren't flaws by themselves, but her sometimes aggressive approaches to telling others off does her few favors. In SHB, she has the Night's Blessed who actually heed her word and respect her, they listen to her and actually take what she says- be it advise or reprimand- to heart.

She does also, however, have to deal with Thancred who, much like the Maelstrom, ignores her reprimands and doesn't listen to her. The difference here is that her bluntness actually serves a purpose. In ARR, her bluntness lacks tact and meaning, simply a result of frustration. The Maelstrom won't listen to someone who doesn't come up with fleshed-out arguments and solutions, but Y'shtola doesn't bother giving them any until she knows they'll listen. But with Thancred, she does give him the solution. It's just that the solution is him. His words, to be precise, and his acceptance. And he needs to be reminded of that, and she does. It doesn't automatically solve anything, but that's simply how it is with complicated situations like that.

Speaking of Thancred, his narrative is probably the most important of all for SHB. He's always been shown as a capable, but ultimately self-destructive man who genuinely does not know how to deal with himself in a healthy manner. Theoretically speaking he knows, he recognizes that he is self-destructive, but he still has no idea how to actually fix it. It's been shown as early as ARR when it results in him getting possessed, but it's not really made a point of until it almost ruins his relationship with Ryne. Up until now he could just ignore his problems, but with Ryne he can't because now The Problem(s) aren't just his anymore. Anything that would hurt him now would also hurt her, meaning that if he wants to continue doing the one thing he actually cares about (protecting his loved ones) then he needs to get his shit together.

But Thancred doesn't know how to. And for all that his friends try and try to help him, he doesn't know how to. He's paralyzed. Thancred is so deep into his self-destructive habits that it takes the threat of both his and the person(s) he loves the most in the worlds deaths to get him into action. He doesn't know if it's Minfilia or Ryne who will return, and I'm not sure he expected to survive Ran'jit. He only has this chance, and if he wants to die without (as many) regrets he has to do something now.

And he does. He does and what it is he does is tell Ryne that whatever happens, it has to be her own choice. That he will accept any outcome, that he will still care about her no matter what, that as long as she lives or dies as she wants to, that he still loves her. He still loves her. And it works, because that's what he's needed to do all this time, to be able to just tell her that she matters. That he cares.

He tells her to live her own life, and he learns to live his own too.

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bigshotautos · 9 months

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XxXEMO_LUV_4EVERXxX (for a collaboration with @jumblejunction!!!!!!!!!!!! )

#deltarune #spamvil #jevil #spamton #todays episode of me being unable to stop from committing to the bit.#had so much fucking fun with this. sorry for the shirts theyre wearing but its my truth .#instead of having a midlife crisis they get an ipod touch and fill that shit up with flyleaf.#the playlist i was listening to drawing this was so noxious that i feel physically sick now enjoy #im a day late for yaoi day but its the thought that counts.

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alpacacare-archive · 6 months

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hey guys is anybody here. hello

@smarties-art

#repostober #day 31 #finishing repostober characteristically late #undertale #sans #papyrus #gaster #smartie's dtiys #i drew this while the dtiys was happening but i lost motivation to finish it and this is what i managed to make-#i felt bad posting it cus its unfinished but idk... its the thought that counts #i think it was a competition actually. i just wanted to draw it cus it was such a cool drawing kjdsfkl.......#i hope the op of the dtiys is fine with me participating in it so late #but i just wanted to draw it #i had an idea that gaster could be using the echo flowers to send messages to his boys. i think its a cool idea and will make people cry #anywasys happy late halloween and deltarune anniversary if youre reading this ily <33333

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bamsara · 9 months

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also im glad that people have (mostly) gotten used to my fic updating schedule where around the time they start commenting 'is this fic discontinued' i can slap them with a 32k chapter and then disappear for another month

#i will probably spit it so not 32k but its the thought that counts #sara shush

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alle-ni · 7 months

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My thoughts about goodomensverse (I'm clinically insane) (my personal opinion) (long post)

Book Crowley:

- absolute disaster

- lonely boy

- grumpiest

- he's so in love with Aziraphale but didn't even realised yet

- a bit dumb sometimes ngl

- very tired

- he's trying so hard save earth and everything he knows but everytime he tries to explain why it's always AZIRAPHALE

- sometimes he's like... your old gay uncle, the old gay uncle of the family except it's a 6000 years old gender fluid demon

- HISS LIKE A SNAKE GANG

- got called dear once and them died (figuratively)

Radio Crowley:

- flirty

- "Humm have you ever seen me in a dress~~??"

- he's like flirting with Aziraphale 24/7

- 0 patience this man is a BOMB

- if Aziraphale ever EVER got slightly flirty with him back he will EXPLODE

- smartest of them all, he's very intelligent

- HISS LIKE A SSSSSNAKE GANG

- he's so in love with Aziraphale and it makes him SO FRUSTRATED

- his Aziraphale is the hardest one to reach, maybe this is why he's so deliberately obvious and direct with him (he's resilient, he will never give up)

- he's like a tsudere teenager collegial except he's a 6000 years old demon with serious issues

- not called dear yet poor soul </3

TV Crowley:

- SILLY

- he's the dumbest of them all, sorry 😭

- red hair

- he's so in love with Aziraphale and everyone notice it's SO OBVIOUS

- he's the most affected by The Bookshop Burning ™ event

- the only one who got to kiss the angel, good for him ig, or sorry, idk

- anxiety bomb he literally (literally) EXPLODE

- strongest soldier bc his Aziraphale is IMPOSSIBLE

- got dumped 2 times more than the others someone pls help him

- the most brave tho

- doesn't hiss a lot :/ free him from this madness let him hiss

- he's like a puppy with giant yellow eyes except it's a 6000 years old snake demon that lies all the time

- protective as hell this man wouldn't let anyone near Aziraphale if possible

- got called dear but at what cost??????????????

Book Aziraphale:

- Anxious all the time, religious trauma except the god is your father and he left you and never talk to you again and the guard angels are your siblings and they want you do be dead

- He's so soft he wants so bad to comfort Crowley but he's really hard to reach

- his Crowley is the most difficult of all of them, he needs to circle him a lot to get in touch

- this man got called names so often I don't think he even cares anymore

- he's very nerdy

- he's the calmest of them all

- really chill

- everyone is so mean to him for no reason

- he has 1 braincell tbh and it's really bad bc his Crowley is not that brilliant too they're both stupid sometimes

- he really REALLY wants to be with Crowley and Crowley only, he sounds almost obligated to be with heaven

- he is really kind to others even when they don't deserve

- he called Crowley dear once and then implode

Radio Aziraphale:

- full of himself

- bastard

- the most closed and oblivious of them all

- he tries to play cool with Crowley all the time (he's slowly getting insane and someday he will jump on this man)

- he's the most self sufficient one he barely holds on Crowley to anything and they're pretty independent

- Crowley can say shit like "Miss me angel~~??" and he would keep a bored face and not react at all (he screamed with the walls 4 hours later)

- he's also a tsudere collegial but he at least try to look cool and composed in public

- he's the Aziraphale that most believes in heaven, he's sure they are good and selfless and the right side

- he's not so brilliant tbh but he got a lot of spirit

- the most active Aziraphale ?? He really put his hand in the dirt and do the things alone

- the most angry and bad tempered of them all, bro scream "WE ARE CLOSED LOOK AT THE DAMN SIGN" when ppl barely touch the bookshop door

- he has a lot of patience with Crowley, not deserved tbh bc he thinks it's his personal job to get in Aziraphale's nerves

- overall he is polite

- he's really proud of their "arrangement" there not only one chance he let go without saying that

- he likes to provoke Crowley sometimes too but not as much as the other way around

- if he ever call Crowley dear he will explode

TV Aziraphale:

- bitchiest

- this man need to be sedated what the fuck Aziraphale

- most nuts of then all he's CRAZY

- he's the most up to do shit with Crowley they're insane together

- he doesn't let Crowley rest he is flirting and being cute and hitting on Crowley all the time

- he's so obviously in love with Crowley its embarrassing

- he's the fruitiest he's the entire salad

- the most... indulgent, if I can say, of them all

- more like an employer of heaven, different of book Aziraphale

- he's the only one with almost white hair

- he got kissed but at what cost

- he's the most intelligent of all of them how can he be this dumb

- he loves little things about earth and humans and life and he seems to be the Aziraphale that most love EARTH itself, like, the life, the humans, the food, the little pleasures we have, the little time of happiness we have between all the shit that is happening... he really loves humans <3

- he's conflicted about heaven, he seems to know that there's something WRONG with how heaven works but still doesn't understand what exactly it is

- "oh but saving me makes him soooo happyyyy~~~"

- overall kind and sweet, in a excited way

#good omens #good omens 2 #aziracrow #crowley #Aziraphale #radio omens #good omens radio #good omens book #thats my opinion #more like some thoughts i have been collecting since im hearing radio omens #not really accurate #does this count as character study????#lol I think not #maybe i have a preference for radio Aziraphale i wrote so much more about him and ended up erasing it all bc it made me look insane #shit its 2 am I'm so sleepy

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charlie-artlie · 1 year

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#robots #polls #i tried to only pick ones i thought people would know #ive only got 10 options here 💦#so yeah i could put muderdrones characters or robofizz or any number of the minor robot characters from homestuck #but i only have 10 options #someone who isn’t me should have a full on robot character tournament #i didnt even put any fnaf characters even though i wanted to #its just too controversial the difference between animatronics and robots even though i do think some of them count but wwwhatever #wanted to put muderbot cuz i just read its diaries #SO GOOD but they were very explicitly clear that it was not a robot #more like a android clone…..i could have a whole other poll for androids #and i think i will

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pinacoladamatata · 10 months

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what have I become? my sweetest friend?

latching onto the 0.3 seconds of Astarion being soft in the trailer like it's a fckin lifeline lads

#thank u larian #astarion #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 spoilers #its about the *hands*#listening to crystal talk about how *one of the romance endings* made her cry. haha. im in danger #this might hurt worse than any other video game romance so far. this sounds like it could hurt me worse than the ninth rain did #which is a Feat bc after the poison song i was sobbing on the couch and my husband thought someone had died #i mean they had but it was ;-;#pina art #also i am counting this as a win bc i can now draw for a solid 30 minutes after surgery!#i mean my elbow is killing me but it was worth it

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