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pomegranates-and-blood · 3 years

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Arinn (Vοσταλγία Winter Blurb)

νοσταλγία Masterlist

Arinn: fireplace, hearth (Old Norse)

Pairing: Ivar/Reader

Summary: Winter Blurb #4. Pillowtalk and annoying priestess soft Ivar, that’s about it.

Word Count: 1312

Warnings: nope, just fluff and my writing lol. Teeny tiny bit of suggestive whatevers towards the end.

A/N: Yeah, idk what this is, but I’m Marie Kondo-ing the shit out of Nostalgia atm, so, since it sparked joy, I wrote it, and now imma share it cause why not, hopefully it sparks joy in you!

“Ivar?”

There’s few things Ivar likes more than his name on your lips, the way your voice forms around the short word, the still notable accent present even then. But, right now, it is not something he wants to hear.

But you are nothing if not insufferably stubborn. Determined, you’d call it, but Ivar prefers to call it by what it is.

“Ivar?” You move closer, and though he keeps his eyes closed you pay no mind. Your hand on the side of his face is soft and slightly cold. Again, waking up to your soft touches and your body pressed against his is something he’d kill for…but on the morning, not the middle of the night. You insist, voice breathy by his ear, “My love?”

“What.”

“I can’t sleep.”

“I can,” He retorts, still refusing to open his eyes. “Let me.”

“Do you still believe it?” You ask him, and Ivar bites back words of how it is the middle of the night and you both should really be sleeping, and instead turns to lay on his side with a sigh. He opens his eyes to find you wide awake, a slight furrow in your lips that tries and fails at hiding a smug smile. By all the Gods, the things he puts up with for you.

“Believe what?” He questions, not caring about stopping himself from reaching for you, trailing up and down your arm with the back of his fingers. You are always slightly cold to the touch, and at his weakest he thinks it fitting that you feel like relief from burning flames under his touch.

“That it was Fated, that…that the Gods somehow intervened for us to meet.”

“Do you?” He asks instead of giving an answer. You notice, of course you do, that he is deliberately choosing not to answer your question, but past a look that tells him he hasn’t fooled anyone, you don’t mention it.

He wants it to be true, if he is honest. On nights like these, especially now that these nights are not promised to one day be remembered as a relic of the past that has long since left him amongst those flames your cold skin saves him from; he almost believes it to be true. It seems impossible otherwise, that you are here now, that you love him and you chose him, if it wasn’t somehow mandated by the Gods that heard him too many times curse his weakness while pleading for reprieve.

If somehow the Gods sent you to him, as a reward or something else -a punishment, his sleep-addled mind complains-; then it is easier to accept it is something he can keep. The idea that it was something he did that made you stay, that made you choose him, is strangely terrifying, even if the alternative leaves him powerless, because it means there is something he can do to make you leave, to make you choose a life without him in it.

You reach with your hand for the amulet of Thor that hangs from your neck, a habit you haven’t let go of even if it is no longer your Gods that are represented in your pendant, as you consider his question.

“I don’t know,” You muse, voice quiet. Ivar lets his eyes fall closed as he offers a quiet hm of his own, a prompt for you to continue. Your voice, warm and comforting, washes over him as you say, “I was taught that the Gods may choose what happens to us, but we decide if or how we let it change us. That is something the Fates cannot decide for us.”

“Your Fates…Moirai?”

“You remember.” You whisper, almost to yourself. He hears the smile in your voice, and it fills him with pride to be the reason behind that softness in your tone, behind that openness in your smile.

“Mhm. The three women.”

“They are three women for you too, aren’t they?” He replies with another sound, something that he thinks sounds vaguely affirmative, and lets you continue talking. “Bend to the Fates, but don’t let them break you. My mother and father told me that, one of the only lessons I remember from them.”

“What is it supposed to mean?”

“I have no idea.” You reply honestly. Ivar chuckles tiredly, and you offer a breathed laugh to accompany it.

“Since there aren’t lessons to answer it…what do you believe, hm?”

He almost wants to ask himself at which point he decided he was the one after answers instead of you, but he doesn’t much care for it. He does care for your answer, though.

“If the Gods, if…if Freyja or Despoina are the reason I am here…it doesn’t matter,” You find your resolve halfway through your words, and Ivar can feel his lips pulling into a faint smile. You adjust in your place, quickly regretting it when you let a cold breeze under the warm furs, and so move closer to him. He likes it when you do that, when you burrow close to him and seek his warmth. It makes him feel…powerful, in some roundabout way. Like you need him as much as he needs you, like you can trust him to take care of you. You pull back slightly to look at him, and he blinks past the lure of sleep and forces his eyes to focus on you. You offer a small smile, “They are not the reason I stay.”

He finds himself smiling back, like the lovesick fool that you’ve made out of him; but after a breath narrows his eyes and points out,

“We could talk about this come morning.”

“We are already talking about it,” You retort, shrugging one shoulder. “We ought to finish the things we start, my love.”

He takes a deep breath. He knows that just by retorting with something he will be doing exactly what you want him to, which is staying awake and keeping you company, but he is too tired to think of a strategy around it now.

So, he insists, “Not really.”

“You were the one telling me to finish what I start a couple of nights ago, if I remember correctly.”

Ivar knows what you are talking about, mostly because he can identify that smug little tone in your voice. In the dim light of the morning, he had your legs wrapped around him and you were moaning quietly against his lips as you tasted yourself on his tongue, but you were interrupted and you just…left. Ivar grew increasingly frustrated during the rest of the day, and he is certain -even if you deny it- that at some point near the afternoon you noticed, and you started making it worse by lingering more than usual on your touches, putting a bit more force in your kisses. He knows at some point during the night, when he finally had you to himself, half-mad with lust he grunted by your ear how you better finish what you start. He still remembers the way the dark and hoarse laugh you let out made a shiver run down his spine.

He grits his teeth, and insists, “Not the same.”

You remain silent for a couple of breaths, and it is enough to intrigue him into opening his eyes again. He finds you smiling a little wickedly, and can’t help the thrill that look sends down his spine.

Another little shrug, and you offer, “It could be.”

Ivar rolls his eyes, “Go to sleep.”

“Sex would help me sleep.”

“Would it help you stay quiet?”

“I don’t know if you want that. You always say you want to hear me m-…”

Ivar interrupts you, leaning forward to capture your mouth in his, cupping the back of your head and bringing you closer to him. He pretends not to feel you smiling smugly against his lips.

____ ____ ____

Thank you for reading, hope you liked it!

Taglist: @youbloodymadgenius @heavenly1927 @toe-vind-ek-jou @xbellaxcarolinax @angelofthorr @samsationalwilson @peachyboneless @1950schick @punkrocknpearls @ietss @itsmysticalmystery @revolution-starter @the-a-word-2214 @fae-sedai @crazybunnyladysworld @funmadnessandbadassvikings @stupiddarkkside @aprilivar @msrawog

#ivar the boneless x reader #ivar x reader #ivar the boneless imagine #ivar the boneless #ivar #νοσταλγία masterlist

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therosefrontier · 3 years

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Whumptober Day 4

No. 4 - TRUST FALL

“Do you trust me?” | taken hostage | pushed

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Genshin Impact | Diluc, Kaeya, and Mondstadt’s resident dragon friend

(crossposted to AO3)

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“Well, what a surprise this is, you asking me for help? You must be really desperate, then.”

“Don’t get any ideas. I’m not asking for your help tonight; I’m only asking for this one favor.”

“So, you play hero and I watch from the sidelines? Hmph, you wound me, Diluc.”

Diluc leveled his eyes at Kaeya with complete lack of amusement. He really didn’t have time for this. He pulled his sort-of brother into the stock room at Angel’s Share this morning with the intention of getting him alone with as little fanfare as possible (he wouldn’t be going to the knights for this, that’s for certain) and in as little time as possible. “I’m serious,” he insisted. “I’m only asking you to do this because you’re the only one who can. I need you to convince Vind to leave her post, just for one night. There’s going to be danger, and I need to ensure her safety. Obviously, I can’t do it myself, as this could reveal me as…well, the rumored vigilante.”

“The Darknight Hero, you mean?” Kaeya supplied with a smirk.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Fine, fine.” Kaeya shrugged. “I understand; you wish to keep your secret identity a secret. No worries; I have no intention of letting Vind be prey to some Abyss mages tonight. I’ll make an excuse to get her out.”

“Right…wait!” Diluc’s eyes widened at the realization. “I didn’t tell you—!"

“That the Abyss Order was the ‘danger’ described?” Kaeya appeared far too satisfied with himself. “Don’t be so surprised. I have my sources just like you have yours. It is the reason why Sucrose is on her way right now to tell Vind about those strange weather anomalies in Dragonspine that need her attention right now, as they could be the sign of a great storm that the expertise passed down to her through generations might be useful for. Plus, she has the official knightly request signed by yours truly.”

Diluc sighed. “You…already had a plan.” Of course, he did. A very official-sounding one, actually. “Wait, is there actually…?” If this was a lie, there was no way that Sucrose would go with it.

“No, probably not, it’s just a little stretching of the truth. I asked Albedo to hype up the facts for this purpose. But don’t worry, he doesn’t know any details.”

And…he got Albedo in on his scheme as well. “You would think of everything.” He exhaled while rubbing the bridge of his nose. “Well, fine then, you do that; I’ll handle the rest.”

It really wasn’t that much of a surprise to him that Kaeya would show up anyways. And, if he was being honest, it wasn’t unwelcome. Especially considering his timing.

Diluc struggled to regain his footing quickly, use the flat side of his claymore as a shield when another barrage of cryo icicles came his way. The cryo still caused a melt reaction on the flaming bush in front of him that made the fire burst in his face and deal yet another painful shot of damage. He inhaled a sharp breath and responded with launching himself at the cryo abyss mage with a flaming sword. He then unleashed his flaming phoenix on the hoard—half of Stormbreaker Point was already on fire, so it really wouldn’t matter if he added more flames to the mix.

A wound on Diluc’s arm was bleeding heavily, and he reached up to touch his face to confirm that there was blood there, too. Before him, a large group of abyss mages and Hilichurls made a blockade stretching across the clifftop and around the watchtower, and behind them, four Ruin Guards stood as support. The grass and trees around them had caught on fire, making a beacon in the pitch-black night sky. Behind Diluc, there was the edge of Stormbreaker Point and the long drop to the ocean. And beside him, there was Kaeya.

Diluc did not expect the fight to be as intense as it was. He knew that the Order was planning some raid because they got it in their heads that the tower at Stormbreaker Point must have something vitally important in it, and that Vind was some kind of powerful, mystical protector of it. Hilichurls hung around the tower a lot, so maybe they…communicated, somehow? Either way, Diluc planned to put a stop to it. However, he wasn’t planning on this much resistance…maybe they learned of his involvement?

Or maybe, that one Abyss mage in the middle, the cackling pyro one, was just a cut smarter than the rest. It made a point to sneer at the “Darknight Hero” upon Diluc’s arrival, and when Kaeya came in from nowhere to bowl through the line and take his place by Diluc’s side, it sneered at him, too.

“Well, if it isn’t the great cavalry captain of the Knights of Favonius? Such a…wonderfully unique star in your eye, isn’t it?”

Diluc felt Kaeya tense by his side.

“Hehehe, what’s the matter? Worried about your precious Darknight Hero? Or your precious secrets?”

Kaeya didn’t respond to the taunt. He kept his stance steady, his sword angled towards the hoard. His one visible eye didn’t lose sight of the sword’s target. “They’re coming,” Kaeya spoke in a whisper that only Diluc could hear. “Our reinforcements.”

So Kaeya knew, coming here, that the battle was bad enough that they would need help.

“What’s that, oh great knightly captain?”

Most of the mages didn’t talk that much. Diluc wasn’t sure they even knew much, or if they remembered things. They ran on their one-track goal against humanity, and they plotted and schemed to meet that goal. It was enough of a reason to destroy every one of their ilk Diluc saw.

(He tried not to think much about what Kaeya told him that day, about the truth. He didn’t know what to do with that truth. He couldn’t protect Mondstadt if he doubted what he should do about it, so he didn’t. Whatever those mages used to be, they were only monsters now.)

Kaeya unleashed a blast of cryo in front of him, and Diluc followed by running into the fray of fighting renewed, taking out every creature he saw. In his distraction, he almost missed that he had been targeted by a Ruin Guard’s missile, and he stumbled to the ground in a desperate last-minute attempt to dodge. A Mitachurl tried to capitalize on that moment of weakness and bring down its giant flaming axe on him, but Kaeya in that moment dove in and struck the monster deep in the side. He then grabbed Diluc and they dodged backwards.

They were going back too far. Little by little, they were losing ground, to the point that their feet neared the edge of the precipice. Still, they fought. It hadn’t been so long for them that Diluc’s fighting by Kaeya’s side felt unnatural…although it was odd. Because, they were older now. Kaeya had a Cryo vision now. Everything was…different, but every now and again, they’d still end up doing something together anyways.

Diluc breathed heavily, his hands around his claymore sweating underneath the gloves. He pushed whatever pain he felt from his injuries somewhere deep, deep in the back of his mind. He needed—they needed to push through the line. He wasn’t confident in the state of his glider after getting himself roughed up and singed so much or in their ability to avoid further attacks during their descent.

“Kaeya, we need to—”

“Diluc, do you trust me?”

Diluc’s eyes darted over to him, taken aback by the gravity in Kaeya’s softly-spoken question. “What kind of question is that?”

“Well, do you?”

As if he could answer that in one sentence or less. He trusted him…in some ways, he guessed. He trusted him in battle. He trusted him…with Mondstadt, yes. Just…well…that was all very besides the point and this was really not the time. “Yes, sure,” he huffed.

“Excellent.” Kaeya smiled.

What was he—?

Then, Kaeya laughed, loudly and triumphantly, a wild look in his eye and he reached out for Diluc’s collar and grabbed it tight. His soft voice had turned into a shouting, mocking one. “Hahaha, end of the line, Darknight Hero! The Knights have no need of meddlers like you!”

What the fu—

He pushed him. Before Diluc knew what was happening, he felt his body succumbing to gravity, his feet losing their hold on the stone of Stormbreaker Point’s edge and following the rest of his body into the open air, suddenly void of every handhold or foothold within reach.

Kaeya fucking pushed him.

Diluc had to open his glider—fast. It wasn’t working. The hell was Kaeya thinking he couldn’t open it in time he was going to—

And then, he landed on something with a thud, much sooner than he should have. The surface uneven and scaly and distinctly familiar, it didn’t take him long to realize that it was a someone. Was that—?

Dvalin arced into the sky with a powerful beat of his wings, looping back around to the space underneath the cliff, coming in close at the moment Kaeya jumped off the edge as well. Diluc repositioned himself on Dvalin’s back to a place of more stability astride his spine and watched Kaeya make a much more graceful (much better prepared, that is) landing than he did.

Diluc’s first thought was that he was relieved to see Kaeya in one piece. His second was that it was time to demand an explanation. “What was that about?”

“Clever, wasn’t it?”

“You could have told me something!”

“But would it have believable to the mages if I did? You’re not that great of an actor, Diluc.”

“Your theatrics are utterly pointless,” Diluc huffed. “And now that we’re both gone, who’s going to stop them?”

“Well, look down,” Kaeya directed.

Dvalin had flown back up into the sky, well above the surface of the cliff but low enough that one could see exactly what was going on. Diluc looked down and saw, sure enough, some familiar forms attacking the small army on the cliff, now at the perfect position to pin them against the edge. He saw Jean herself, along with Amber, the Traveler, Eula, and a number of other knights as backup. Diluc had almost forgotten that Kaeya did tell him about the reinforcements. Looking again, he noticed even Venti hanging in the back, acting as if he were there for mild support and not the actual anemo archon. Dvalin’s presence was probably his doing. Wait, Kaeya didn’t know about Venti, did he…?

“Since we had discovered during our Golden Apple Archipelago adventure that our very curious bard friend is a good friend of our resident dragon, I thought I’d ask him for his assistance. Sure, there’s other ways we could have gone about this, but sometimes, striking fear into the hearts of your enemy is very much a job for ‘theatrics,’ as you called them.”

Well, it did make some sense, Diluc guessed. He was just relieved to see that the reinforcements in question were having little trouble that hoard which had given him such a difficult time solo. Still, the relief didn’t quite keep all the lingering irritation from his voice. “You really called in the knights.”

“Well, this may come as a surprise, but that is their job.”

“Hmph,” Diluc grunted. “You say that like it would have been easy to get the bureaucracy to trust an anonymous source about the attack happening in the first place. They’re consistently useless on matters like this.”

“So you still don’t trust them.”

“No.” He’s established this already.

“All of them?”

“I trust Jean,” Diluc clarified.

Although, he supposed she might not be the only one on the list. There were…some knights who knew what they were doing, mostly. And, he had respect for the Honorary Knight, not that they really counted as a “knight” in an institutional sense.

“Well, that’s a start.” Kaeya shook his head with a smile. “I’d be worried if you threw even her under the bus for doing nothing wrong at all.”

“It’s not like that.”

“Is it, now?”

“Kaeya, what are you even talking about?”

“Well, maybe I could bring to your recollection that because of your insistence on working alone, you walked into a rather significant ambush today, facing a threat to Mondstadt without bothering to communicate to the people of Mondstadt, and also sending poor Vind all the way to Dragonspine because you couldn’t be forthright on the potential danger to her life.”

“You know that last part was specifically your plan, right?”

“But you were the one who wanted me to make up an excuse.”

“You literally already had your plan in motion while I was talking to you this morning!”

“Are you two quite finished?” Dvalin’s booming voice rattled through their ribs, his point made quite loud and clear.

“Right, understood,” Kaeya agreed. “So, Diluc, ready to head back and get someone to look at that arm of yours?”

“I can still fight, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“I do not think that would be necessary. They’ll be fine, and besides, I can always return to provide backup.”

“No,” Diluc refused. “If I’m seeing a healer, so are you.”

“So you’re fine with that, then?”

Dvalin was already ending his circling to start heading towards the city of Mondstadt, but Diluc could still look back and see the clashing forces on the cliff, now with two Ruin Guards down and many more mages extinguished or thrown off the edge. It was clear to see who the winning side was, now.

“It’s fine,” Diluc finally conceded with a steady exhale. “I trust them.”

#whumptober2021 #no.4 #do you trust me?#pushed #fandom #fic #genshin impact #diluc (genshin impact)#kaeya (genshin impact)#more fluff than whump ngl #i mean...pain is involved still #abyss order shenanigans #the ragnvindr brothers being their dense chaotic selves

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darkacademicfrom2021 · 3 years

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The Dark Team (part 12)

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(Taglist: @lucywrites02, @louieboo87, @the-departed-potato, @jesuswasnotawhiteman, @idontknow296, @beksib, @spythoschei, @geekwritersworld, @whatafuckingdumbass, @mysticunicorn7 @shadowolf993 @toe-vind-ek-jou @joscelyn02, @t00-pi, @irwxnhugsx)

Warnings: alcohol.

Disclaimer: pic not mine.

After the sun came completely down and the night bathed the city, making the flashing lights of the buildings and cars look like the sky had spat all of its stars, you gathered all your work and called it a day. Thor, Steve and Bucky were able to go through everything you told them to, and everything was in control. You had managed to solve a chaotic situation from the distance, and the pleasant feeling of doing things right gave you the last push to close your laptop and join Peter and Loki.

Opening one of the windows, you let the fresh wind hit your face and unfurrow your brows, releasing all the tensions you had been accumulating all week long. Peter sneaked up from outside the building and hung upside down from the frame. You gasped, forgetting for a brief moment he was sticky and not completely out of his mind.

“Are you joining us, older?”.

“Yes, little. I’m going”, you laughed at the comeback of the nicknames. Standing for older sibling and little sibling Tony had baptized you with, years ago. Loki chuckled.

“You two are the epitome of adorability, sometimes”.

“Oh, we can get worse”, you laughed.

You had ordered some food in, without wanting to ever touch the mess of that kitchen again, and a bottle of wine. Nobody was there, else than you three; might as well have fun. As you waited for dinner to arrive, you decided on a slide presentation night. You gave each other no more than twenty minutes to arrange it all, so the chaos would be absolute and uncontrollable.

Peter presented first, with a long powerpoint ranking things the Avengers did in “vine-vibes” ascending order. You two tried (and failed miserably) to explain to Loki what a vine was and why something would have its vibes without being actually a video.

Loki’s presentation was titled “Seven hundred reasons why you shouldn’t worship the God of Sparkly hands”. There were actually only six reasons; two of them were about mass murders he was about to commit, and most of them talked about annoying things he did as a child. There was an extra one where it was just a white background and tiny letters in the middle saying “he dyes his hair blonde, he’s actually a redhead”.

Your presentation was titled “Seven hundred and one reasons why you should worship me instead”. No need to elaborate. They all differed except for Friday; she clapped with her electronic hands.

Two board games and some chess later, the food had already arrived. Peter was famished and ate more than you could’ve imagined a boy was capable of. He got so full, so quickly, that he instantly got sleepy. Loki could not bite his tongue and had to say “just like a baby”. It did not help that you snorted, and Peter shot his webs at you two; Loki avoided them and you couldn’t, so you ended up stuck to the roof. Peter started to walk to his room, leaving you up there.

“Hey, hey! Don’t leave, I’m still here!”, you called him. But he was gone. What an avenger. Loki chuckled, and raised his hand to free you with magic, and you instantly realized you were six meters away from the floor. “Wait! I’ll fall!!”.

He didn’t stop, and dissolved the net with a simple spell. As you fell down, you closed your eyes and tried to cover your head, knowing you’d have at least a broken bone. Peter has done this before, you knew there was no way to actually leave unharmed. Loki’s arms tightened around your body, avoiding you to fall flat against the floor.

As you looked up, you met his face, closer than ever. Closer than it ever has been. Your heart skipped a beat, and you knew you had to think about something else than the feeling of his chest against yours, his hands in your back, how he was holding you so gently, how he was looking at you so dearly. You knew you had to think about something else; for he could be reading your mind. He surely was. But you couldn’t. You couldn’t stop focusing on his peach lips and how soft his cheeks looked from up close. You couldn’t see anything else than the movement of his Adam’s apple when he swallowed hard, and how his hand trembled a little in your back.

He let you down slowly, still holding eye contact, still with his arms around you. Not the threatening gaze he would hold against everyone else on the compound. Not the lustful gaze he would sometimes draw while stealing some glances at you changing on your suit (he thought you didn’t notice, you certainly did). Not the concentrated gaze he would hold still on his face while reading one of those books he always carried around.

It wasn’t any of those. You had studied them thoroughly, meticulously, every inch of his facial expressions, every inch of his being while he wasn’t aware of your eyes on him. God, how you hated to look at him this way, but how much you couldn’t avoid it. Your brain knew you shouldn’t get attached. You had no chance at all to be with him; he was a God, a criminal, and he’d go back to Asgard. And, foremost, he didn’t feel the same. He had a lover, and his mind was still there, stuck in that person, undeletable.

And, as much as you could have read him like a children’s book the entirety of the past week, right now, you had no clue what those green eyes on you meant. You had no idea why the blush on his cheeks was in there, and why he let out a tiny (the tiniest, ever so subtle) gasp. Parted lips that shone, looked so…

You shook your head, closing your eyes. He didn’t let go of his grip around you, but your feet were already on the floor. You could’ve walked away if you wanted to. And you wanted to, you definitely did not want to stay there, and sink your nose in his neck. You certainly did not want to play with his hair while staring at those pair of emeralds he couldn’t keep away from you. You couldn’t read him. He looked at you in a way you’ve never seen him before. Yet it felt so… right.

No, it wasn’t right. God, what were you thinking?

He pulled away, and the cold breeze from the window surrounded your body. You didn’t realize how much body heat he was warming you with until he left. Or maybe it was your own. Your face was still burning. You visibly cringed at your reaction, and could not play it cool at all. He chuckled, again, and walked to the kitchen.

You didn’t say anything. Your face still burned, and your chest was tight. You haven’t felt like this in a long time, why now? Why in the middle of an important mission? Why just now, that he specifically told you he would not stay, and that once he left he would not come back? Why now, that he was opening a bottle of wine in the kitchen, and pouring it in two glasses?

Opening the balcony’s doors, there were two metal chairs (those with delicate designs, that would usually belong to a grandma’s garden) and a round and tiny glass table, just waiting for you two to sit there. You needed fresh air, so you did, sinking in all the city, the active flashlights of the cars, the minute people running around, or walking.

Two glasses of wine clicked against the glass table, and Loki sat in front of you with his eyes fixed on the city, too. You observed him from the corner of your eye, and he did the same. A subtle smile drew across his tightened lips.

After a glass of wine, a refill and about an hour of small talk, he uncrossed his legs and stretched his arms and back with a yawn. The blush still remained intact on his cheeks, and it couldn’t be because of the wine. If you weren’t drunk, much less him. He looked back at you, and chuckled uncomfortably.

“What?”, he asked.

“What what?”.

“You’re staring”.

“Oh, sorry”.

“No, it’s fine”, he said, and you furrowed your brows. He specified, “I don’t mind. I wonder what you’re thinking while you stare, nothing more”.

“So you’re not reading my mind?”.

“No. You said you didn’t like that”.

“Ah”, you gave your glass of wine one last sip and emptied it. It was such a simple gesture, yet you didn’t expect him to actually have listened. Of course he would, he wasn’t actually as bad as he was portrayed by Stark, or so you have seen so far of him. “I just… I wonder about you”.

“About what?”.

“You’re difficult to read. My job here is mainly knowing how to read people”, you explained, and he nodded. “It’s almost like you’re purposely hiding. Like you’re shifting your microexpressions into whatever they are now, so nobody can see what you actually think or feel”. He let out a short chest laugh. Probably sarcastic, but how would you know.

“Who would actually want to know what goes through my mind?”.

“I do, just told you”.

He looked down and played with the empty glass in between his fingers. It looked small in comparison.

“You don’t want to, believe me”.

“Are you afraid of letting people in?”.

“No, it’s not that”, he said, trying to let you know he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. You ignored it and opened your mouth, but the words died in your tongue as he added, “please, don’t”.

“I wish I knew you better”, you said after a few more minutes of silence. You swore you heard a creaking foot on the stairs, peeping in the conversation. You ignored it; if Loki was to talk to you, he would also say it in front of Peter. Not like you had some sort of special bond, or even friendship. You kind of wished for it, though.

“Why?”. His knitted eyebrows showed how actually curious he was about that. He believed you. He was certain you were telling the truth, but he simply couldn’t put his head around it. Why would anyone want to know me better? What is it about me that you care? And you wished to know the reason, too. If you knew why you were so drawn to him, maybe you could’ve stopped yourself.

“I feel like I’m missing out on something”.

“Something like what?”.

“Something great”.

“There is no greatness in me, it’s all an act”.

“I know it’s all an act”, you said, referring to his whole I’m a God and you’ll kneel before me and I’m superior. “I don't mean that kind of greatness. You’re hiding the wrong things”.

“You’re not missing out on anything”, he insisted, and not for humility, but because he wanted to brush you off. Keep you away from him.

“Don’t you think we could ever get along? Friends, even?”, you pressured. You knew you shouldn’t have, but Loki didn’t take it badly. Instead, he finally looked at you, drawing a sad smile.

“I’m going back to Asgard after the mission. I don’t intend to make new friends”, he said, but a softness in his voice hinted he wasn’t being mean; simply stating the facts. Exactly as it should be.

“Why did you come only for this mission?”, you asked. You actually wanted to ask do you even have friends back there?, but you knew better.

“I owe Stark. I messed up and wanted to fix at least something with him. He’s not taking it too kindly, but I think he understands the intentions”, he explained, sitting back up on his chair and getting his eyes back on the city.

“A peace offering?”.

“More like an apology. Redemption, even”.

“Redemption? Do you see yourself as a villain to him?”.

He didn’t answer right away. Took his time to find the words.

“I wronged. I did things I shouldn’t have”, and then you realized, he wasn’t apologizing for the New York incident. It was personal. You even wondered, maybe… was he…? Was Tony actually the...? No, imposible. “I know helping out on a mission won’t cut it, but if I can at least be a little bit of help to his planet…”.

“May I ask what did you wrong him in?”.

“I tried to take over Midgard once”, he said, and you didn’t believe him.

“If you ask me, it’s not Stark’s place to accept that apology. He doesn’t own the planet, even though he thinks that”.

“Does he?”.

“He acts like such, at least. He has a big ego, but also a big heart. He’s the closest thing I have to a father”.

“I know”, and you weren’t sure what he had said I know to.

The night was kept awake with more small talk you wouldn’t remember the next day. You saw the sun rising from behind the buildings in silence, with a bad aftertaste of wine, takeout food and unspoken words that would stay just like that.

#loki #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #loki x reader #loki x gender neutral reader #loki x you #loki of asgard #tom hiddleston #marvel #loki mcu #mcu loki #loki x y/n #loki fanfic #loki headcanon #loki fic #loki fluff #loki angst #thomas sharpe

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fatesinthenight · 6 years

Text

Schneep's Headache (part 6)

You snack on some chips while you flip through the channels on the television. It has been a week since you last spoke to Schneep. You still felt angry toward him, his words did leave a dent in you. Sometimes you would get upset at yourself when you think about going to the Septic house. It frustrates you that as upset as you are with him that you still want to try and talk to him. Nothing on the T.V is interesting you so you just leave it on the Food Network channel for the hell of it. It was then your phone goes off.

"Hey you." You sit up more. "It's been so long."

"(Y/N) it has been at least two weeks. I'm getting better at managing my time." You sibling pouts. "You know I get busy."

"I know I know. Being a nurse at a hospital is a lot of work." You cuddle a pillow.

"I keep getting night shifts too. Luckily I just got my schedule changed so I'm in the morning now." Nurse sighs in relief. "So how is it in Brighton?"

"It has been interesting. I'm still not used to it, you know being in a whole new country." You did leave home to go to school abroad. It still amazes you that when you wake up you are in a whole area you never thought you would go to. "When the snow comes in I will take pictures for you. I will make a snowman in your honor."

"Awww you miss me." Nurse teases.

"Of course I do." You start to feel down. You wish they were there with you, someone to talk to. Your roommate was a good friend but your sibling was who you confide in more.

"So tell me. Have you been taking care of yourself?" Nurse always worries about you. They know how clumsy you are and always patched you up.

"I have been perfectly fine." You lie.

"Lies." Nurse flat out calls it.

"Fine... I passed out once." You hold the phone out ready to be yelled at.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU PASSED OUT!!!" Nurse clenches the phone.

"I'm fine. I got taken care of." You get quiet thinking about Schneep.

"Are you ok? You sounded sad at the end." Nurse knows you too well.

You look at the floor. "It's nothing really. Just a dumb guy thing."

"A guy!" Nurse sits up straight. "What about a guy?"

"I kind of met someone..." You don't know where to start. "So when I passed out he helped me, he is a doctor actually. I thanked him at his clinic and he started looking after me. He worries as much as you sometimes. I got to know him on my visits." You have a sad smile thinking about it. "He tries to care for everyone even if it means overworking himself. I don't even think the man has ever had a break. His personality is serious bit he can be a bit dumb to when he is with his friends. It's kind of fun to see when he lets himself have fun. To see him laughing and smiling."

"He sounds nice." Nurse is happy to know you met someone. "But what happened?"

"He snapped at me. He was dealing with a problem and when I tried to help he said I was a basically a bother to him. A hazard if anything. I know I am a very clumsy and I don't take care of myself well enough. Mom and dad did not want me to come here because of that. Everyone thinks I cant make it out here alone... so his words did sting." You hold the pillow closer.

"(Y/N) I know you can make it out by yourself. Mom and dad are really proud of you. They keep going on and on about how you are going to school in Brighton, bragging really." Nurse laughs. "We do trust you are fine. Your family just still worries about you because well we miss you."

You smile at that. "I miss you all to."

"As for the guy problem I think he didn't really mean what he said. People tend to say things they don't mean when they get frustrated or mad. He may just feel sorry about it." Nurse encourages you.

"It's been a week since we talked. I feel like if he really wanted to apologize he would have called or something." You feel like the damage was done.

You get a knock on the door. "O someone is here. Talk later ok?"

"Ok. Bye I love you." Nurse saids.

"I love you to." You hang up the phone.

You go to the door and open it. What you did not expect to see was Schneep standing at your doorway. His nose is a little red from the cold and his scarf is loose, like he just grabbed it and threw it on. He looks at you a bit winded and breathes heavily. Schneep holds the door frame for leverage and puts his head down. After taking a few breaths he looks back up and fixes his glasses.

"Hi..." He breathes out.

"How do you know..." You don't remember giving him your address.

"Long ztory zhort I asked Marvin to vind you." Schneep still tries to slow his breathing.

"Ummm are you alright?" You get concerned. "You look like you ran here."

'I did." He admits.

"Wait you seriously ran here from your house!" You bring him in your house. "I will get you water. You can sit down."

Schneep plops on the couch instantly. He tilts his head back and takes off his scarf and coat. You walk back in the room with a cup of water. You watch his chest rise and fall as he slows his breathing more. He takes off his glasses and leans forward, going into his pocket to get a cloth to clean his glasses. You are used to seeing him with glasses that without them he doesn't look like himself. Schneep finishes up cleaning and looks up at you, his eyes are sad. You hand him the cup and he drinks it down.

"Zank you." He looks down at the cup for a while. Schneep looks up at you. "I vanted to speak vith you but I vas to stupid not to do it zoner."

You sit down on the couch beside him. "Well I'm all ears."

#dr. schneeplestein #henrik von schneeplestein #septic egos #jacksepticeye egos #dr. schneeplestein x reader

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galacticlamps · 3 years

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This one was really fun as well! I’m probably starting to sound like a broken record at this point, but I can’t help it if Flux is being consistent! And frankly I don’t see that stopping any time soon because the teaser trailer for next week’s episode has weeping angels in the 1960s, which, like, sign me up please.

My spoiler-free take is I think this ep did a really good job of weaving backstory and context into the season while still being a self-supporting episode, I appreciated that structurally. It’s nice being at a halfway point and knowing enough to speculate but still having the feeling that there’s something bigger that’s yet to be explained/revealed. When the first episode ended with “it’s the end of the universe! dun dun dun” I had worried the stakes might’ve been too high too quick, but I think it’s all playing out at a nice pace

idk why but I really liked that voiceover at the top, I think it was a great lead-in or lead-back-in to the cliffhanger moment, and I love seeing what’s going on in the Doctor’s mind, especially with thirteen being one of the cagier incarnations

Ruth! nice to see her again, though I'm a touch confused why she can talk to the doctor instead of just being her reflection, but it's more interesting that way so who cares. and wow jodie’s acting’s really shining in those scenes where she’s playing the other incarnation, and the glitching between incarnations was also a wonderful way to see more jo martin. i’m assuming they filmed the whole scene with each of them and then spliced, i wonder if we’d ever be lucky enough to see both performances as like some kind of extra/behind the scenes thing? i was also definitely trying to figure out who her other team members might be the whole time (read: hoping for a gat cameo) so i am a touch disappointed we didn’t find out who yaz and vinder were standing in for but it was at least fun to see dan basically playing action guy/karvanista for those moments.

Like I said before, I really liked how the mechanices of this ep let us witness entire scenes/plots worth of backstory but made them vignetteish things that were actually part of the current plot, the only downside is that so much background on vinder, the division, and swarm meant, airtime-wise, less dan and yaz. since parts of the last few episodes have been devoted to introducing dan, i feel like yaz is the one really getting the short end of the stick here in terms of story focus (don’t get me wrong, i greatly appreciated yaz popping up in all those different roles/costumes in other peoples’ memories) - but I’m also hopeful on that score for next week, since the angels seemed to be following her specifically and next week is all about them. one thing that’s interesting about yaz being somewhat sidelined so far is that in the last two episodes at least, she seems to have consistently been the hook that pulls us into the next week’s story instead of being mainly focused on the current one, it’s like she’s one step ahead the whole time.

i am now EAGERLY awaiting the bel spinoff - pre-flux, post-flux, during flux, i dont give a flux - she's just cool and adventurey and i would love to see more of her, whatever the context. i was already thinking that before the end of the episode explained why she was relevant, but even having learned some of her backstory I stand by it! Besides, Vinder knew what a Tardis was on sight and immediately wanted to pilot it, and he seemed the most conscious of the fact that he was reliving memories, actively asking it to stop happening (though that could just be because we spent more of the ep on his pov than others?) but either way, he still seems interestingly advanced slash mysteriously well-informed so I’m thinking the place/society he & Bel come from must be an intriguing setting that I would love to learn more about it. (separately, i had genuinely convinced myself she was talking to a woman this whole time so i was like woah major plottwist when it turned out to be vinder but lol it wasn't really, that was just my fault for making stuff up). but im assuming that egg thing with like health stats and stuff is monitoring the baby? which makes all the talking to it so much sweeter in retrospect, what a cool idea

on the subject of the tardis tho, god, how long is it gonna take for her to get some attention? the door in the floor was bad enough but her new pilot? yikes. where’s the doofenshmirtz meme when you need it? if i had a nickle for every time the angels had the phonebox, etc etc

i’m sure we’ll learn about it properly at some point but for now im just enjoying the Vibes of an older woman nonchalantly performing an inexplicable task at the end of the world like ‘why do u care if the universe is over honey? get a new hobby plz, now shoo’ it feels kind of douglas adams in a good way, and while i know the show’s not quite absurdist enough to just leave that sitting there without it becoming relevant to the plot eventually (at which time i’ll form a real opinion on it), im just digging it at present

i also almost forgot about him again, which is starting to feel really intentional, but the muttonchop man made another utterly unexplained cameo in the first half for the third time in a row! I guess it’s safe to assume we won’t actually learn much about him until either the last episode or the moments leading into it in the penultimate one, and it’s not like i’ve got much in the way of actual theories about him, but i’ve got my eye on him all the same

#thirteenth doctor

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travellingunicorn7 · 4 years

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I deleted this thinking I was outside the realms of reality and I probably still am, but I've decided to repost only because why should I delete it? Most of the sentiment is true and I'm not going to be shy or embarrassed about it. Fuck anyone who wants to be dick over it. Just because maybe it also focuses on one person, for everyone else- perhaps it focuses on you too, just as much.

Here is an novel/essay on my feelings. After this post I am going to try my hardest not to post anything else along these lines because I just don’t want to, I’ve said enough now. I’m just begging if I say anymore, and I don’t beg. I worry about some of the things I have said and I hope I haven’t overstepped a mark. I don’t really want to post this, but I feel if I don’t I may not get what I want, but then I may not get it anyway, so why not just say it and be done with it. Please don’t do anything hasty from this, accept what I have to say and don’t shoot it down in flames before thinking about it, because you never know, some things may be worth considering.

1. I am a true convert to Royal. You will not get me cruising with another company, not if I can help it. But I can not keep cruising on the same ships. I need to mix it up and see something different. I’m loyal to royal but I’m not loyal to the ships. I will be doing my absolute level best to see the other vessels within the fleet and if that means flying halfway across the world, so be it, I don’t mind, because I love to travel, but it does annoy me a little Australia misses out a fair bit.

2. I am saving madly to get to the Caribbean, Miami, London and the Netherlands. I am hoping between 2022-2025 these trips will happen. I can’t specify dates yet because I’m not in a position to and quite frankly I don’t want to say too much online about it, because I would like to make new friends in person where I get their contact details and maybe ask if they would like to be my personal travel guide when I finally get to these places. However I intend to stay for a full month when I do visit these four parts of the world.

3. I’m not going to the Caribbean for 1 cruise. What a long way to go for just a week. I intend to pay for 2-3 back to back cruises within the Caribbean. I want to visit Coco Cay, Aruba, Curacao, Bonaire, and where possible; Jamaica, Mexico, Haiti and Puerto Rico. I am sold on Odyssey, she will happen, and I’m tossing up between Explorer, Oasis, Independence, Allure and Symphony. As for the Netherlands: Amsterdam, Zaandam, Zaanse Schans, Leiden, Lisse, Den Haag, Scheveningen Strand, Delft, and possibly Rotterdam are all places I intend to visit.

4. Lelepa and Wonder of the Seas: I’m still hesitant, on these two, only because I have concerns, Australia will not be considered fairly when it comes to more information being released about them and Australia often falls into the Asian category when it comes to travel destinations. However if Wonder can be taken away from Asia then yes I will consider this ship. If Wonder is taken to Lelepa from Australia- I’m looking at Brisbane- then yes I will consider Wonder and Lelepa. If Wonder can not be taken away from Asia, then Royal and Brisbane better make some decent decisions when it comes to other ships in their fleet, that aren’t already here, such as Mariner, Navigator, Symphony, Independence, Allure, Harmony and/or Oasis to make their way to Australia for me to consider going. I’ll make that call when further announcements are made and on the completion of Brisbane’s new cruise terminal. I also believe Sydney is looking at building a new cruise terminal too, which I’d like to believe Royal will come to the party and provide Australia their “bigger and bolder” ships in confirmation and completion of that. Also I understand Lelepa will be different to Coco Cay but it better not be lacking too much. I would like some similarities for me to consider visiting.

Before all of these changes of new cruise terminals are completed, I would love to see ships with similar sizing to Ovation, Explorer and Voyager (considering our ports aren’t big enough), visiting Australia more, as there’s not enough itineraries and I wouldn’t mind going from Australian port to Australian port; rather than heading to the South Pacific or New Zealand all the time. I don’t want to cruise with Carnival or Princess and no offense to the Radiance class ships, but they lack too many activities for me to want to jump on them, I know these ships do visit the Australian ports more; I just need a mixture of places to see and things to do on board. Not one or the other .

5. I am not interested in visiting Asia. There are few reasons why, I just don’t want to explain them here. Asia in general seems to have some amazing landscapes, and the people I know are wonderful but I would rather get fat than go to Asia. Unsure why I should, because I just said I have no desire to go, but, persuade me to go to India, Malaysia, Singapore and Japan and I will consider Quantum and Wonder. However will I be looking at a carbon copy of Ovation if I step on Quantum?

6. I am learning Dutch. I enjoy it. I will continue to say and write things in Dutch so I can continue to get a grasp on the language. I’m planning a trip to the Netherlands and the Caribbean. I know people in the Netherlands speak English but I think it’s only fair I learn their language too. I am also looking at Russian and Polish after I feel I have successfully got the Dutch language ‘down pat’.

7. Why Dutch? Why the Netherlands? There are several reasons, one I’ll explain later, I can count at least 5 reasons. Get time off and come and find me in Circular Quay checking out Voyager and Ovation and I will tell you why. Or better yet when it’s holidays, kom alsjeblieft naar Bairnsdale en vind me. Kom me alsjeblieft bezoeken, don’t fly straight home…

8. I cannot keep posting my music. My music tastes ranges from rock, pop, classical, electronic, dance, hip hop, rap, alternative, indie, folk, punk, blues and metal. Country is the only genre I suffer through. A few Australian country music stars however, can be tolerable like Lee Kernaghan. As long as the artist has 99% input into the way the music is delivered then I’ll listen. As much as I enjoy sharing my music, because I love music, there comes a point where you start to know too much about me, without actually getting to know me at all. You want to get to know me, talk to me. Here is a list of some the bands I have the most music of and if I could share my iTunes with the world I would, but I am not subscribing to several different streaming services to do so. Spotify is enough:

Linkin Park

Garbage

The Killers

Glass Animals

Arcade Fire

Peking Duk

Safia

Rufus/Rufus du Sol

Delphic

Florence and the Machine

Sia

Interpol

Kingswood

Major Lazer

Miike Snow

Kings of Leon

Gomez

Duke Dumont

Friendly Fires

Zhu

Jamiroquai

Spoon

Flight Facilities

Arcade Fire

The Aston Shuffle

Fatboy Slim

Basement Jaxx

Chemical Brothers

Groove Armada

Marilyn Manson

Placebo

Foals

Nine Inch Nails

Mø

Arctic Monkeys

Cold War Kids

Hayden James

Mansion Air

Presets

Chvrches

Beck

The Rapture

The Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Jack River

The Prodigy

New Order

Depeche Mode

Korn

Kasabian

Muse

Oasis

Gorillaz

Two Door Cinema Club

Calvin Harris

9. The list of emojis; There are stories behind them all. I will tell you if you want to say hi. ♉⚽🏊🏏🌹🇦🇺🔮🇳🇱🎶👻🚢✈🤸🐈🌷🌩. I’ve just explained the music emoji, I’ll explain my love of travel. I love my country I’d like to see Darwin, Broome, Perth, the coast of South Australia including Kangaroo Island, Tasmania and Northern Queensland. I want to go back to the US and Canada, and maybe New Zealand. As mentioned Netherlands, London, Caribbean and Miami are currently on my immediate list. I’d like to see parts of Russia, Poland, the rest of England, Scotland, Egypt, Morocco, Chile, and Peru. I work to earn money to travel and play pole. If money was no object I’d just spend my entire time travelling maybe I could study further and be a professional pole teacher, teaching all over the world? Just a thought. I like to spend my money on experiences and culture and education, not unnecessary things. So the aeroplane and ship emoji reflects my love for travel and cruising and ships in general fascinate me including the stories of ‘ghost ships’. Yet there will become a time I need to set up roots, sooner rather than later, and south east Queensland is currently getting my attention, but I’m not closed to the idea of moving OS either.

10. I will continue to be as honest as I can and saying things that may or may not sit well with others without name dropping. I don’t like sugar coating, yet somehow I live in a society where people get offended so easily. So I hold back. I say things on here and on my instagram because I can be me and say things that are true to me because somehow there are people who are offended in how I live my life, and it makes me worry about what our society is turning into where people are scared to say what’s on their minds or say how they feel without a keyboard. Too many people are wrapped in cotton wool these days, it’s why they get offended over the most miniscule thing. I think about that a lot, and that’s why I try and not care about other people’s opinions. It doesn’t always work but if you want honesty, check this out or instagram or better yet- get to know me and talk to me in person.

11. Let's talk about honesty for a moment. Lying and keeping secrets from me doesnt end well so don't do it. Being honest with me may upset me at first yes, but I'll accept it and let things be. Honesty is the best policy, regardless of how much someone may get hurt, just be honest.

12. This gets to my next point, why is it ingrained in current culture for arguments sake that men should be the one chasing the woman to get her attention. Why can’t the woman let the man know she’s interested? This whole ‘chase’ mentality just really needs to stop. She’s not going to play games with you when it comes to feelings so don’t string her along. Let your ego relax a little and let the woman ask you out. Let her ask you to come home with her, she’s wanting to get laid, and just as a guess you probably do too because you paid attention to her in the first place and wanted her to notice you. She might even want more too if it’s all worth it. She’d be open to anything ranging from friendship to lovers, to whatever works. We’re all adults and I’d like to think we all switched on enough to work out fairly quickly whether something is worth continuing or not. If he wants to do the work fine, I’m sure she’ll let him, but he shouldn’t be rejecting any effort from her when it’s given to him, because it’s probably taken her some courage to do so in the first place and wouldn’t he want the pressure taken off him just a little bit especially if he wanted her attention? She’s also probably just as interested, he would know if she wasn’t interested; and women can be capable too.

Both parties should be able to meet each other halfway with effort, and work 50/50 to make a go of things. It shouldn’t be give and take and it shouldn’t be one party or the other doing all the work. It should fall on both sets of shoulders. A lot of women get tired of getting attention from guys, so they reciprocate that attention because they’re just as interested, by being proactive and doing something about it, and are more or less ‘ghosted’. That’s cowardly behaviour. If a man shows interest, follow through with that interest, don’t bail before giving anything a chance. Why can’t women make the first move to get what they want too? Didn’t the man initially get the woman’s attention because he wanted to sleep with her? Maybe she does as well…

Maybe it’s the social media. We all have it, we all enjoy it, it’s not going to go away, but it’s changed everyone’s ability in how to speak to one another. People are afraid to say how they feel now regardless of whether it’s good or bad. We can be keyboard warriors and armchair experts to strangers but we can’t have decent conversations with people we actually meet and want to get to know further, we are all too scared. How do you think your grandparents met each other? They didn’t have social media, they met each other in person, and spoke to each other in person and showed effort to each other. Maybe social media and the online world is what makes guys run away from normal or average or different because they are so used to seeing ‘perfect’ that anything different to ‘perfect’ hits them for six, and they don’t know how to handle it. I’m not perfect and I refuse to be, what a hard life that would be to live up to and expensive too. All that botox and plastic surgery just to be ‘perfect’ and to put on a persona that’s not me- no thanks. I’m happy doing what I’m doing. I enjoy my exercise, it makes me feel good and that’s enough even though sometimes I do have doubts about my body, I see so much ‘perfection’ online that I often feel like I’m expected to look the same. I prefer to be stronger, fitter, have muscles and just be myself any day, than worry about what snap chat filter to use, or how much money I need to go under the knife or change my personality to impress people, so just take me as I am.

13. Also if you are in a relationship be honest about it. We don't need to see the ins and outs. That's no ones business other than yours and your partners, but leading other people on, showing other people your attention, letting them think that you're single and they may have a chance with you, when in actual fact you're not and they don't have a single chance whatsoever. That's not on. Not only does it upset the person your paying attention to, it will also upset your partner and then most likely everyone loses in some way shape or form. So just don’t do it. It's almost a form of cheating and I don't have time for cheaters. There will be no second chances with cheaters. If you are not 150% in your relationship and you want to be with and pay attention to other people, then break up.

Once you make your partner feel like they're not the only one, whether it's cheating or not, that's a rule breaker. If you are paying attention and showing interest and appearing keen and single to others, when you're in a relationship, perhaps you need to take a good look at your own relationship and decide if it's for you or not. Maybe the relationship isn’t strong enough to keep going, sometimes you have to be honest with yourself, and especially if someone within the relationship, is wanting to make eyes at other people and wander, that’s not showing your partner any respect. (Not everyone deserves everyone’s respect, and that’s life, just don’t be unkind about it). Decide if things need to change and work on them. Don't throw your relationship away before you think about it properly, but if you’re not into the relationship 150%, throwing the relationship away is probably the best option. No one likes to break relationships up, but maybe walking away from the relationship is what needs to happen too. Look at Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth? Sad they couldn't work it out and make they're marriage last, but they obviously weren't happy, and the following behaviour, especially from Miley where she wanted to wander, she really wasn’t ready to settle, she wanted to be with other people, now I think they are both better off apart. You should be in a relationship for the right reasons. Is there a reason someone is paying attention to someone else and showing them interest? Are they really ready to settle? Or do they still need time to be with other people?

If there's someone else, before you go breaking everyone's hearts, make sure that someone else gets your complete and full attention, don't go doing the same thing by paying a person number 3 the attention you paid person number 2, when you just left your last relationship with person number 1 for. Does that make sense? Prove to the current person you are with (even if it means you broke up with someone to be with someone else), that they are the only one for you, and that you only have eyes for them. They deserve that at least. Person number 2 doesn't need you running around behind their back giving person number 3 attention, just like you did with person number 1 to get to person number 2.

Just don't cheat. Break up before you move on is all I'm saying.

14. Going back to all things Dutch, maybe I’m learning the language for one of many reasons; to impress a guy and get his attention, and I don’t know how successful it is, but it’s my way of trying and/or making an effort because he is still in my head. He is Dutch, he works abroad for 95% of the year, he doesn’t even live in Australia and the situation is incredibly far fetched and that damn difficult, I don’t even understand why I would even want to pursue this idea, but if you really can’t let something go, you put in the effort, you try and want to make it work, right? He will not leave my thoughts and I miss him way too much, more than what I should. I would love it if he either let me make an effort or he made a little effort in return, but I don’t expect too much really, I’m sure I’m flogging a dead horse after eight months and counting. Maybe he’s just someone who’s very easy on the eyes 💪 who I can only like from a distance 😍. I would like to be his friend, I would like to take him home and have sex with him and I would like to get to know him. Situations can be hard, and situations can come with huge limitations and often situations distort reality, I get all that, but give me a little credit. I hope he thinks about me just as much as I think about him. I hope he misses me just as much and I hope some days he thinks about the exact same things as I do, like wanting to get to know me too, or wanting to come to bed with me… naked… 💋 I suddenly have Tove Lo’s Talking Body in my head.

15. If he wants to see me, or wants to give something a go with me, be it anything, then I’m giving him a few choices: Don’t fly straight home at the start of the holidays, come to Bairnsdale, het is niet zo moeilijk om een supermarktmerk in Bairnsdale te vinden waar ik voor werk, omdat iedereen boodschappen nodig heeft. Be my personal travel guide… Netherlands… Caribbean… Miami… Please transfer and be around when the 30/01/2021 arrives. I’d love to see a friendly and familiar face. I will be partaking in water slides, mini golf, ice skating, and laser tag and I will consider surfing and rock climbing. I still have around 14 months to go until my holiday and I’m not giving up hope that I will see him again yet but maybe one day I will if I can’t see anything working, I can’t hold on to nothing forever.

16. Would I like to contact him? Would I like him to contact me? Fuck yes, but I’m not here to beg for his attention. I also feel I shouldn’t, that I haven’t got the right to, so I sit here quietly thinking about him and doing nothing about it…. So, I’ve said my piece. I’m interested in him and I think about him every day. Everything tells me not to be, but here I am, still interested. I’ve tried contacting before it didn’t work, and I can only hope I see him again sooner, rather than later, for one last opportunity and where possible, there’s a way around the situation- whether it works or not, whether I can try and contact him or not, time will tell. I do think he’s around again for a reason, I just hope that, that can extend out until January 2021 if that’s the only chance available. If everything fails, it fails, and at least I can say I tried without bailing before giving it a chance and I’ll accept whatever life throws at me, I’m used to that. I will ask though; I’d like to know why Australia is on the cards again at the same familiar home? I appreciate it regardless and although I hate the fact I’m not around this time and it’s so long before my holiday and wishing I could find the time to see him sooner, I’m sticking around aren’t I? I’ll just be over there instead of the familiar, as I said I’m loyal. All I can say is, please accept my feelings for what they are. I can’t ask for my feelings to be reciprocated even though I would like them to be, I guess I would just like them to be have been acknowledged.

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wrenhyperfixates · 3 years

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For Now

Request: Ok, so president Loki somehow sneaks away from all the madness and walks for a little bit, he comes across an old tempad that's cracked but has one timeline saved into it, it lands him in this cute little cottage where he meets the reader, the reader comes outside and see him and sees that his hand is well.... missing, they're a witch and heal his hand with their magic and he asks why they helped him and they say "everyone deserves a little kindness" he stays with them for a bit and its fluffy because he doesn't know what love or kindness is and it ends with him saying something along the lines of "every good president needs his first lady" Pairing: President!Loki x female!witch!reader Warnings: angst and fluff; spoilers for the Loki show episode 5! A/N: For my bestest best friend @lokistan. Hope you enjoy, bean!

Permanent Tag List: @lucywrites02 @frostedficrecs @lunarmoon8 @twhiddlestonsstuff @lokistan @lowkeyorlokificrecs @gaitwae @whatafuckingdumbass @castiels-majestic-wings @kozkaboi @cozy-the-overlord @birdgirl90 @myraiswack @mythicalgarlicknot @what-a-flammable-heart @marvelouslovely @laurenandloki @fallinallinmendes @sophlubbwriting @mooncat163 @lokislittlesigyn @wolfish-trickster @electroma89 @jgun2001 @toe-vind-ek-jou @i-beg-your-pardon-laufeyson @theaudacitytowrite @patches-of-mist

(strikethrough means I can’t tag you; message/ask me to be added to a tag list)

It seemed to be a Loki was to buy into the lies you’d been fed your whole life. Norns forbid a Loki try to better themself. Truly, what was so wrong with running a presidential campaign? Apparently something because, as Loki found out, it warranted being snatched from his timeline and getting pruned. And so, Loki had learned the hard way to play into what others expected. Be a snake, steal the throne, hoard the power. Unfortunately, it seemed like every other Loki in this forsaken plain had the same idea.

Fighting. It was always betrayal and fighting. It was wearisome, really, Loki thought. He for sure had had enough of it, though he supposed he couldn’t speak for the other versions of himself. The old man and kid certainly seemed to agree (and the alligator which was apparently also a Loki, he supposed), but they all disliked him. A team up would be useless, he was sure, and he wasn’t particularly interested in more backstabbing. He’d had enough of that for the day.

Luckily, so many Lokis all in one place caused quite the hubbub, especially when they were all fighting. It caused the perfect distraction for him to get away. Admittedly, it was a bit hard to climb a ladder with only one hand, but he managed.

Alioth wasn’t around, at least. It was a small silver lining, but something, at least. Army-less, friendless, and without any better options, Loki began to walk. Certainly there was some other shelter in this Hel. Just when he was giving up on that notion, something crunched beneath his once well-polished shoe. A TemPad he realized, picking it up almost reverently. This was something of a rare find. After all, it’s not like the TVA was getting pruned. Though, they had seen a surprising amount of agents come this way the past few days (weeks? Months? It was hard to tell time here.). Perhaps one had somehow brought this with them.

Taking a deep breath, Loki opened it up, hoping it wasn’t too broken. Like a miracle, it flashed to life. He looked around; surely this was a trick. But no one was around in the wasteland. Fiddling with it as best he could with his one remaining hand, Loki found a single saved timeline. It was a start, he figured as he selected it. It opened a familiar glowing golden-orange door, and he walked through. He always expected it to feel warm, but as usual, it felt like there wasn’t anything there at all.

He landed, somewhat surprisingly, in a quaint little cottage. There wasn’t much to see, and he wasn’t too keen on exploring until he was certain the area was safe. Trying to be fleet-footed didn’t exactly work when traveling on creaky steps, but luckily no one came.

Loki made his way to the gardens outside. It was there that he finally ran into someone.

“Who are you?” you asked. “What are you doing here?”

“Well, you see, it is simple. I am-”

“Hurt!” you interrupt. “You’re hurt, you poor thing.”

“I do not need your pity! I am Loki of Asgard and-”

“Oh, hush you,” you shush. “Just let me look.”

He winces as you take hold of his forearm, and you offer a look of apology. Loki tried to relax as you examined the area where his hand should be. He was unaccustomed to such gentleness, but he craved it. After so long in the void, after his whole life really, he didn’t quite know what to make of it. You didn’t seem to buy into his act, either. But if he wasn’t who everyone expected him to be, who was he? Perhaps he didn’t know the answer to your question, after all.

“Don’t worry, I can heal it. If that would be alright with you?” You cocked your head and looked at him with such innocent eyes.

“Yes. I suppose that would be fine.”

You began to weave magic, much to Loki’s awe. It hurt a little, but he grit his teeth and withstood the pain. He’d been through worse.

“Thank you,” he said once you were finished. “So you are a sorceress, then?”

“A witch,” you chuckled, making sure it was fully healed. “And you said you were Loki?”

“I did. I am. Whatever that means.” You finally let go of his hand, and he found he missed your touch. “Why did you heal me?”

“Everyone deserves a little kindness,” you shrugged.

“Well then. Thank you again.”

You smile. “You’re welcome. So, where are you off to now?”

He considered for a moment. “I do not know.”

“Well, I have room of you’d like to stay awhile.”

And so, that’s how the God of Mischief escaped the void at the end of time and came to live with you, his little witch. You taught each other magic, becoming stronger and falling more in love by the day.

“You know, when I invited you to stay, I only meant for a little bit. And now look at you! You’ve taken over the house,” you playfully chuckled as you folded his favorite blanket over the back of the couch. Then you walked around to the front of it to face the lounging god.

“I love you too, my darling.”

You roll your eyes as he pulls you down to him. Seeing no reason to resist, you snuggle against him. “Will you stay forever then?”

“Well, every good president needs his First Lady,” he chuckled.

“And I would be honored to have the position. I love you, Loki. Always,” you happily sighed.

In that moment, perfectly at peace with you, Loki found he didn’t much need to figure out who he was just yet. For now, he was content just being yours.

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pomegranates-and-blood · 3 years

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νοσταλγία (Chapter 31)

νοσταλγία Masterlist

Pairing: Ivar/Reader

Word Count: 5.3k

Warnings: The usual

A/N: Hope you like this one! There’s a greek dress mentioned, and it is inspired by this one and this one

Thank you for reading lovelies, please lemme know what you think! Love ya!

Taglist: @youbloodymadgenius @heavenly1927 @toe-vind-ek-jou @xbellaxcarolinax @pieces-by-me @angelofthorr @samsationalwilson @peachyboneless @1950schick @punkrocknpearls @ietss @itsmysticalmystery @revolution-starter @receptionistfromhell

The sun is starting to leave way for the moon when the door to the shop is opened again. Words about being closed are leaving Valdís’ lips but she catches the figure of the Prince and saves them.

Hvitserk greets her and Freydis with murmured kindness, and turns to you with questions and also an apology in his eyes. Reminded of the last time you saw him, when he left you in the training fields after angering his brother, you think he may feel guilty, so you offer a smile as you approach him.

“What is the matter?”

He offers only a half-hearted shrug around his easy smile, “I will let you guess.”

“The King calls for me.” You say in a sigh. The Prince laughs quietly, nodding his head.

“Yeah,” Hvitserk says, offering you your cloak from the hanger by the door, “You didn’t need your premonition for that, did you?”

As you walk away from the shop with Hvitserk by your side, you cannot help but asking, “Is something wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong, but…we must talk of war, and Ivar wants you to be there,” After a few moments of silence, you hear him speak again, pride shining through his tone, “My plan to avoid more losses than necessary when raiding Strepshire, it pulled through.”

“What do you mean?”

“I had contacts that had traveled to that city, some even that had been called to bring forth some of the Lord’s more…extravagant tastes.”

“Should I ask?” You ponder out loud, a small furrow of your nose. The Prince chuckles.

“No,” He sentences without hesitation. With a deep breath, he continues explaining, “Well, I discovered through these…merchants that the city has tunnels for the family, servants, and all the like.”

“Tunnels your brother can use. Tunnels Stithulf wants to use.” You breathe out, stopping dead in your tracks and facing Hvitserk with a growing smile on your face.

But he only shrugs in response, and explains, “You mentioned old stone, and it didn’t…make sense that the Saxons would depend so much on a fishing town.”

“You are brilliant.” You laugh, eyes wide.

Hvitserk shrugs, but you see him puff his chest at the praise. It is almost adorable.

With an arm going around your shoulders casually he offers,

“I had to be. Can’t have the Greek Priestess outsmarting all of us.” He teases with a smile, to which you roll your eyes. Hvitserk keeps his arm around your shoulders, and guides you all the way to the longhouse.

____

The Vikings prepare for a raid on Strepshire, with Hvitserk’s information being the last piece they were waiting for to take the city. A matter of two days, and they will set sail.

The brothers and their men are discussing war, and once again you are reminded, as the King speaks, of how brilliant Ivar is when it comes to battle and thinking like his enemy.

He discusses how to ambush them from their tunnels, how the ships should approach the city, how the brunt of the forces -the ones that will approach directly through the front gate- should ready for the attack; he talks about it all with a certainty and a glint in his eye that speaks of seeing the world differently than everyone else, and you find yourself enthralled.

Hvitserk calls out your name and you turn to him. He gestures with his hand,

“Do you have anything to say?”

You share a look with your husband, “Ivar already knows all I know of Stithulf’s army.”

Leaving the longhouse behind with certain steps, you eye the area around it for a small clearing of peace, Ivar trailing behind you. When you find it, you stop walking, turning around to meet Ivar’s eyes. After a moment of consideration, you smooth the ground underneath you with a sweep of your foot, and try imagining the formations in the earth.

“What are you doing?”

“You asked me to show you my people’s ways of war,” You reply without hesitation, not lifting your gaze of the ground, “I’m showing you.”

You feel his eyes on you, but eventually Ivar sighs and with a small sound of exertion lowers himself to a sitting position across from you.

“Narses always fought like a Byzantine, waged war like one too,” You recall the outskirts of Dublin with a small smile, and draw the first line, “But here he bent to Stithulf’s formations, he accommodated our people to fit his plans. It cost us everything.”

“You spoke of someone else, a man from the Mediterranean.”

“Acar, the mercenary. He’s commander of the Arab forces. They are going to be the first forces Stithulf will send to aid the city, I’m certain,” You start confidently, “They are the same men that have brought a large part of my homeland to heel.”

“How do you Greeks fight against them?” One of the Vikings asks, and you are forced to walk up to the map when an opening for you to do so is made, silently, between the warriors discussing.

You do not fail to notice you are made to stand on the other end of the table, across from Ivar. You meet his eyes for a moment, and he only bows his head, prompting you to go on. An encouragement, a promise you have a safe place to land, a reassurance he has your back.

You never realized how much you needed it, needed him; until the moment you had so many eyes on you, awaiting like beasts for the next move of the foreign witch, and found your heart settling its beat, your confidence strengthening, when he met your eyes and promised he trusted you, promised you he was listening, promised he was proud.

Resting one hand on the table and letting your eyes trace the letters of Strepshire’s name, you explain, “We don’t fight them in open fields. The cavalry will always push for flanking your formations, especially if you hold a shield wall, and if you hold a direct onslaught against them for too long, their infantry will make way for their cavalry to strike through no matter the cost. Avoid that, avoid…predictability.”

After a breath, you add, “There’s also warriors we called champions. They are precise and deadly; they were used in the Mediterranean to weaken an army’s morale, to disarm their plans.”

“How?”

You swallow past a dry throat before answering, “By killing the leaders, the heroes. They send their best not to thin the army’s numbers, but to cut off the army’s head.”

You find Ivar’s eyes and you realize now what the knot in the pit of your stomach that settled since you heard they were to raid Strepshire was. Fear.

Even the best fall in battle, even the best go to their Valhalla when their Gods cut off the thread of their fate. And you cannot help but fear Ivar will not return from that city, even if he survived Repton, York, and so much more.

You tell yourself you should feel shame at wanting to keep him alive, that you are believing his lies and your own by allowing yourself to care about him. You also know if he were to die, if Ivar weren’t to return, your status as a free woman -and your status as Queen, even if consort and nothing more- would be useful and you could leave Kattegat, return to the Greeks, never spend another day on this cold land.

You know all this, and still you fear, still you know when time for battle comes both their Gods and yours will hear prayers for protection.

Returning your eyes to the map on the table, you suppress a sigh. You were never nothing other than hopelessly foolish, were you?

____

Ivar told you to go ahead and retire for bed without him, and from the room where they discuss war you two went on different directions.

While you were changing, you eyed the red dress Thora had helped you make a few days ago, while she’d not-so-subtly prodded at Hvitserk’s doings. It is a light and simple dress, certainly not made for the harsh cold of Kattegat, but confectioning it was familiar and nostalgic, and even if only as a keepsake of your home, you made it to resemble a Greek summer dress.

Instead of the night dress you usually wear, you chose the soft red fabric, and for a moment, with your feet bare and your hair loose, you felt closer to Gods you did even while standing in their temple.

You now sit on the ground by one of the larger windows of your bedroom, a collection of flowers and branches around you as you work on a wreath, not so different, even if life has proven to be so, from when you were a child in Eleusis, a healer in the Silk Roads, a Hiereia in Attica.

In your mind you go over what was discussed tonight, you go over all the certainties the Viking’s planning gives you that this will turn out in a victory.

You knew before this you trusted Ivar, his instinct, his intellect, his eyes that see beyond what others’ do. But Gods, to hear him speak of war and battle so surely, to see his eyes turn cold and calculating, the eyes of a strategist, to hear his voice imposing and certain, the voice of a leader…it is something else entirely.

He accepted your words about the Arab champions with surprising ease, and with his eyes on Hvitserk he asked about the dimensions of those tunnels under Strepshire.

In a matter of moments, Ivar turned the tide and decided to let Stithulf’s men have the tunnels, certain the Saxon would send through those tunnels the Arab champions to take out the sons of Ragnar and their higher-ranking men. With but a moment of consideration, he’d found a way to outsmart them.

You still hear his voice in your head, stating confidently that the Arabs haven’t faced enough Vikings, that the Saxons may be used to tricks but the foreigners aren’t. It still sends a thrill down your spine, remembering his voice lower when he stated the last steps of his plan, remembering his smile as he looked at the map on the table, certain of victory and hungry for it.

You don’t know how long you spend here, working on the wreath of flowers, with each intertwining of the stems a plea to the Goddess of Spring that she lets winter hold for a while longer, with each drop of blood you let the roses draw from your fingers an offering to the Queen of the Dead that she doesn’t take him from you just yet.

Ivar walks into the room, but don’t lift your gaze from your work, only greeting him with a hum.

“That dress is different, did you make it?”

“Greek peplos,” You tell him, nodding, “Or, my best attempt at it, anyways.”

“You look…”

“Cold? Yeah, I’m freezing.” You still stay there, your feet bare on the cold wood and your fingers carefully tracing over the crown of flowers.

“Beautiful,” He corrects, before taking his eyes off you with a slight twitch of what you could swear is embarrassment in his expression. Ivar acquiesces, “But…yes, also cold.”

You have to bite your lip to keep yourself from smiling like an idiot. Not even reminding yourself that you are Queen, that you are a grown woman, that you are married to him could keep the stupid flutter of your heart.

“T-Thank you,” Is what you settle for saying. “I’ve missed wearing familiar clothes, to be honest. I feel closer to my Gods in this.”

“Ah, so you’re praying.”

You lift your gaze from your work, eyes narrowed, “I was there at the sacrifice, I honored your Gods. That doesn’t mean I won’t honor my own.”

He doesn’t fight you on it, and a part of you wonders why.

Ivar chooses not to say anything, and with practiced ease starts working on the buckles and fastenings of the braces on his legs.

“What are you praying for?” He asks after a few moments.

Time.

You keep your gaze on the flowers in your hands, strikingly reminded of the last time he left you behind to chase after war and death.

Through gritted teeth, you bite out, “I hope you know that if you don’t return, if…if you leave me alone here, I’ll find a way to make you regret it. You won’t rest in your Valhalla while I have breath, Viking, so don’t…don’t die.”

Ivar only smiles, eyebrows lifted.

“Are you threatening me?”

You hold his gaze, and swallow past a tight throat. You only ask one thing, “Don’t leave me alone here.”

In this kingdom, in this world, in this life.

“You’re not…scared for me, are you?” You say nothing, only glare at him from the corner of your eye. “Are you saying you’d mourn me if I died?”

What kind of question is that? You resist the urge to let your fear become venom, you bite back accusations of how he continues to be so blind to how much he means to you.

“Ah, so you notice I care for the monster that took me captive?” You say, though there’s lightness, mirth, in your taunt, “You are either insulting me by implying I am weak enough to pray for the life of a man I supposedly hate, or…you are admitting you were wrong.”

Ivar accepts your words with a shrug, and crawls to one of the cushioned settees near the bed. After a few moments, with his hand by his mouth, he admits,

“I…realize you were right.”

“So you were wrong.”

He frowns, “I didn’t say that.”

“But you were.”

Ivar rolls his eyes, an exaggerated gesture that only manages to make your smug smile wider.

Still, when you’re close enough, he extends a hand, beckoning you to him. And it is as easy as breathing, for you to take it and sit next to him, drawing your legs up underneath you, as if to protect vulnerable feet from the cold of Kattegat.

“Gods, woman, you’re freezing.” Ivar frowns, warm fingers closing over your own.

“What happens if those ships don’t return, Ivar?” You ask, your voice wobbling. You feel your breath quicken, and you are once again a child looking over the horizon of Eleusis, waiting for a navy that was never to return. “What happens if you don’t return?”

“Then you are free. Free of me, free of-…”

“Ivar.” You interrupt him, and it is all you can say. His expression softens, and he sighs.

“Do you want me to promise you that I will survive?” He asks, an edge of incredulity, of levity in his tone. As if he is trying to make you see the madness in your request.

It is in the hands of the Gods, you know this. You know you should not fear, you know you should not worry, you know you should do and feel and be many things.

But you still offer the shrug of one shoulder, and Ivar almost smiles.

After a breath, he acquiesces, “Better men have tried to kill me and failed.”

You accept his words, his strange form of reassurance, with a smile and a sigh that trembles past your lips.

After a few beats if silence, you ask, “You will come back before winter, won’t you?”

“Yes,” He assures you, but Ivar spares you a glance out of the corner of his eye, and offers, “If I don’t…”

“You will,” You sentence, interrupting him. You don’t even hear whatever words he tried speaking, words that spoke of the possibility of a winter alone here, if not a lot longer than that. After a moment, you offer, “If you don’t, you’re easy pickings for the Saxons. Dublin cannot hold if Stithulf regains his strength.”

You know you’re right, and Ivar knows it too. Still, he offers you a smirk, and taunts you, “And you are certain of this, wife?”

“Your arrival, your support, spared Dublin of capture, you know this. We had the upper hand,” You motion towards him with your chin in a taunt, your lips pulled into a smile that dares him, “Even with your mighty army, Ivar the Boneless, us Greeks made you falter.”

“Arrogant.” He accuses, but he still smiles, dark and proud.

“We were hungry and cold, far from home,” You remind him, “But we made you change tactics a few times, didn’t we?”

“We weren’t going to lose.”

“No, I know that. It was Fated that it ended the way it did,” You shrug, “But we made you fight for it.”

You could swear Ivar’s smile turns softer, more secret. He lifts the hand he holds to his lips, and presses a soft kiss to your fingers.

“That you did.”

As he is to drop your hand back, his eyes focus on the small wounds you sport on your fingertips. A drop of blood trails slowly down your ring finger, and Ivar hesitates only for a moment before he brings your hand to his mouth again, only this time to lick off the offending drop.

Your breath catches in your throat, and in the hungry and proud smile he sends your way you see the faint stain of red. The only thought in your head for a moment is the need to taste that blood off his lips.

You quieten those thoughts, using that same hand to shove playfully at the side of his face. Ivar snorts a laugh, but you could swear his eyes are darker when he looks back at you.

Your own eyes are drawn to the slight smear of blood you leave on his pale skin and…Gods, what wouldn’t you do to be able to close the distance and lick it off.

But you force yourself to also let go of those thoughts, and you let your smile dim as silence reigns between you again. Your eyes trace the wreath of flowers that lays there near one of the windows, an evidence of your prayers, an evidence of your weakness and your fear.

An evidence that your heart isn’t yours anymore.

If it ever was.

You cannot keep yourself from remembering his words yesterday, his accusations that you were somehow playing with his head, with…

Before your thoughts get ahead of you, you ask, “Do you truly believe I’ve been playing with you?”

Ivar looks ahead as he considers his answer, leaves you to watch his profile and the way the dim lights of the room play with the angles of his face.

“If you’d been playing with me, you wouldn’t have fought the way you did.” He tells you finally, but there’s words he isn’t saying.

“And I’m not fighting anymore,” You offer, earning a half-hearted shrug from him, and nothing else. An exasperated yet fond smile curves at your lips, and you sigh, “I told you before, your own thoughts are what drives you mad most of the time.”

The smile Ivar offers is one purely for your benefit, tired and bitter and gone in an instant.

For a moment he lowers his gaze to your joined hands, distractedly brushes over a small cut on your finger. His gaze is enthralling even if his eyes still don’t meet yours, and there’s a fragile sort of vulnerability written into the way he holds himself that makes you pause.

“In all my life, nothing…nothing has come easy,” He explains quietly. After a moment, he offers another flickering smile, though this one does speak of softness, “You certainly didn’t either, but lately things are different, and I can’t help but think it a…a vision, a mirage, that once I get close enough to having will just…vanish.”

He finishes his sentence with a gesture of his hand, and your eyes follow the movement with a dull ache in your heart.

You’re suddenly a chained and wrathful Priestess again, sitting across the table from your captor and having him share very similar words, “Nothing has come easy in my life, and since I was a child I would always ask the Gods why.”

You still don’t have an answer, though you wish you did.

You do have the certainty that this isn’t a trick, that this isn’t something easily lost. Never could be.

And looking into his eyes, meeting your fear with his own, both so different from each other; you decide to let go of pretenses and masks, if only for a moment.

If only for a brief, stupid moment of courage.

It won’t vanish. I love you.

You let your hand cup the side of his face, your thumb caressing the scar you are so smitten by. Keeping your eyes on Ivar’s, you lean closer, silently begging that this is not wrong, that this is not another mistake.

His skin warms under your touch, and you watch with baited breath his lips part in innocent anticipation as you grow closer and closer. Ivar’s eyes travel to your own lips, before anxiously returning to meet your gaze again, looking more lost and vulnerable than you ever thought you would see him.

Deciding to listen to your heart, you press your lips softly against his, closing your eyes and letting the electricity and the warmth take control over your body.

Ivar’s sharp intake of breath through his nose, the way he tenses under your touch and almost freezes at the affection is not strange to you any longer, and it doesn’t deter you.

You move your mouth over his, the hand on the side of his face urging him close with as much tenderness as you can have when your heart beats like it wants to leave your chest and burrow into his.

When you pull back, his mouth chases after yours, and Ivar leans forward as if a thread tied you two together. You allow yourself a smile, tremulous and girlish as it is.

His eyes open slowly, as if awakening from a dream, and his breath leaves his parted lips quickly as he gazes back at you. A few moments go by, breaths shared and your heart beating fast and thrilled in your chest.

A challenge, really, to see who yields first, who admits to craving the touch of the other’s lips, who offers and who accepts or rejects.

The Gods may have made you arrogant but they didn’t make you stupid, and you’ve known for a while this is where you were headed, this is where you wanted to be.

Doesn’t mean you’ll admit it, at least not like this.

Surprisingly, it is Ivar who caves first.

“Kiss me.” He breathes out. A dare, a command, a plea.

And you do, with no hesitation this time.

Ivar kisses you back hungrily, deeply and desperately, demanding with teeth and tongue what you give freely.

His strong hand grabs onto your wrist tightly, keeping your caressing touch on his face, while the other finds a home in the back of your head, gripping onto the loose strands of your hair.

It feels like it is the first time you’ve kissed him -been kissed by him, been kissed at all- and yet it feels like the electrifying touch of his lips on yours is a dance as old as time itself.

There’s a tremble in your hand when you hold on to the fabric over his chest, there’s an urgency in his hands as he pulls you closer; but there’s an ease to the way you straddle him, there’s an intimacy in the way he breathes your name over your lips.

You lose track of time in the heady feeling of his lips on yours. One of his hands grabs at the side of your jaw, tilting your head to meet his kiss, the other settles roughly on your ass, bringing you down against him, drawing you closer, closer, closer.

You gasp his name against his lips, breaths labored when you rest your brow against his, heart beating wildly in your chest when you meet his eyes.

You smile, breathless and a little mad.

But Ivar looks at you like someone who just realized stands at the edge of a precipice. His eyes widen, and he pushes you off him, however shakily.

Rejection burns, it burns and scalds and your lips part but no words leave them. You can only stand there, cold and hesitant, and watch as he scrunches his face in reluctance, in hesitation, in anger.

Ivar lifts a hand to the back of his head, avoiding your eyes with a twitch of anger, of shame.

“You know I can’t…I can’t do this.”

You stare back at him, heart still beating fast and cold taking over you. However slighted you were by his abrupt rejection, however scared you are of your own feelings, however torn you are about the things you want; all of it pales when you see the expression in Ivar’s face.

When you learned Laconia was free, when Fate released you of the strings holding you by the throat and you threatened to break at the seams; you clung to Ivar like he was the one thing keeping you in this world, and past the unsteadiness of his legs that at the moment you couldn’t think of, maybe out of sheer will and strength alone, he stabbed the wooden floor and kept you upright, didn’t let you fall, didn’t let you break.

And the same certainty flows through you, the same steeled resolve, the same drive to grant safety and comfort and peace.

And so you don’t hesitate when you step closer again, one of your hands tentatively settling on his shoulder, the other, as if half of you was braver than the other, reaches for the side of his jaw, thumb going back and forth over the scar under his eye.

“This doesn’t have to be anything other than…this.”

You lean down and bring his mouth to yours, softly. It surprises you and delights you in equal measure, how easily Ivar surrenders to your kiss, how pliantly he leans to meet the touch of your mouth on his.

When you part, his eyes open slowly, and the absolutely enthralled expression on his face as he stares up at you sends a rush of heat through you.

But, after a moment the daze disappears. And he still grits his teeth, his eyes still jump from place to place, and he still insists, “I…can’t give you what you need, what you want.”

You shake your head, unwavering. You once again wonder which one of you is the bewitched one, when with but a look Ivar makes secrets spill from your lips, when with nothing but his touch he makes invisible bindings release you.

“What I need is you,” You whisper. Your hand on his shoulder lowers, presses softly over the center of his chest, and you lean your brow against his, never taking your eyes off his, “What I want is this.”

You wouldn’t have believed yourself to be brave enough to, even after the words leave your lips, and with the truth you tried ignoring is looking right at you; not falter, to not feel the instinct to pull back, to return to secrets and safety.

There’s no hiding you’ve wondered what the cost would be to give in, hoped maybe he would give in and so you would be able to have this without the guilt of having chosen it.

There’s no hiding you wished to just forget for a moment there’s a world past him and accept that maybe it was Fate after all, that maybe this borrowed time is a chance to live another life.

Your fingers digging into the wooden pillar of the home are the one thing that keeps you upright as you confess, the last breath of an already dead woman: “I wish I never returned here. I wish…I wish I had gone with you to Kattegat, like you said we could. I wish I could have lived another life, móðir.”

The life that should have been, maybe.

Maybe that is why it is so easy to accept his hands on your hips bringing you back to him with a gentleness that almost surprises you, maybe that is why it feels like home when you straddle him and put your arms over his shoulders, maybe that is why it feels like your heart beats in synch with another’s when Ivar leans his head against your chest and sighs.

Your hands trace over his back, his shoulders, you cannot help it. You find yourself almost giddy with the realization you can now touch as much as you want to, as much as he will let you.

A voice in the back of your mind reminds you that pretend as you wish, you are aware you could have had this, or something so much closer to this than the scraps you’ve been living off of, much earlier.

Ivar says something, but you do not hear it, and you ask him with a hum of question to speak again.

You feel his shoulders rise and fall with a deep breath, “You’re what I need too,” He breathes, before moving so that he presses a kiss right over your heart. Your breath catches in your throat and your hand moves to the back of his neck before you even realized you’ve moved. He smiles against the red fabric of your dress, and offers, “What I want, too.”

It is yours.

But you can’t say that. He will be taking your heart all the way to England with him, and you wish you could relent and let him know of that, if only to give him the task to bring it back to you.

You don’t make any attempt to move, and he doesn’t either. Your fingers tire of aimless wandering, and you silently take up the task of undoing his braids.

You could swear he leans more of his weight against you as you work your fingers through his hair.

You once prayed for the borrowed time you’re living on to last a lifetime, and as you sit there, his arms around your waist, his face pressed against your chest, you don’t see why it couldn’t be so. Why you couldn’t stretch time however you want it to. You have no doubt you could, as long as you can remain with him holding you like this, letting you hold him like this.

After a small lifetime, you whisper, “We should go to bed.”

Ivar hums an agreement, but it takes a few more breaths before he leans back. His hair falls loosely behind him, pliant and soft after you lost track of time running your fingers through it, and you find yourself smiling, lovesick and foolish, at the proof of your work.

That night you don’t sleep. You talk, and kiss, and touch, and discover. And you make out of the borrowed time you live on a small eternity.

____

Sooooooo...? :)

#ivar the boneless x reader #ivar x reader #ivar the boneless imagine #ivar the boneless #ivar #νοσταλγία masterlist

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escboras · 6 years

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Tre månader senare

Hej Hej!

It has been three months now that I arrived in Sweden, and I think it is a nice duration to start to write on this blog! I would like to start by my first impression and what are, to me, key components of my experience here. I will develop later key point in hope to help people who consider coming here (through EVS or on their own) to have some insights on how life is, what is important to know / do when you are freshly arrived in Sweden.

Now that this short introduction is made, I wish you a pleasant and instructive reading.

Sol vind och vatten

As some of you maybe know, I arrived on the 5th of February, during the cold and snowy Swedish of the winter. Apparently, the only week it had not been raining that winter was the Christmas week, how ironic.

From where I’m from (south of France) we are not that used to the snow and arriving in this white country made me feel like a child.

Picture on my way to work - 12th of february - Borås

The first two weeks were very intense, but everything was very well organised. I met the other volunteers the first evening and Sebastiano and I were here warmly welcomed.

Since I arrived on a Monday, I could not really unpack before the week end, the schedule was pretty tight and there were many things to do: getting to know my co-workers, my co-volunteers, my job’s places, the city, getting familiar with my room, etc. Emotionally speaking it was very tiring but thrilling at the same time.

I must say that I had underestimated the winter, and how I was used to the sun and its presence. Meanwhile I am writing these lines, leaves are carefully popping out of the branches, the sun is finally looking in our direction, it feels like a rebirth. I think this feeling is as close as I can be from a bear waking up from its hibernation.

Botaniska trädgården - 5th of may - Göteborg

A tip if you want to find the people who have been in Sweden for a long time: they are the only one thinking that 20 degrees is too warm! To me it is perfect.

There are good side to be conditioned to weather, I don’t take sure for granted and I enjoy every moment of sunshine more than if I were in France, where I took it for granted.

Arbestmiljö

I work in two different places that are connected. One is a youth center (before 18 - fritidsgård) and the other is a community center (over 18 - mötesplats). The job is different according to which place I’m working in. At the youth center, my job is mostly to do activities with the kids and to be a referent and to provide a safe space for youngsters in a neighborhood that is perceived by some as problematic. At mötesplats it is more to assist people with their administrative tasks, to talk with people who are seeking some company or guide them to social services that are able to help them. Both places are thought to provide people with assistance, to prevent violence and to bring people closer.

Front window of Hulta’s Mötesplats - 21st of February - Borås

My experience as a worker here is very different than the one in France. Here, people are more … chill I would say. They take time to have brake, to bound, to discuss. I cannot say if it is only because of the field I’m working in, or if it can be extended to all working places. Anyway, I could observe some specificity that appears to be pretty common here: the comfort of employees is central in management policies. Therefore, it is not unusual to bring comfortable shoes to be at work, like slippers for instance. You can also adjust the height of your desk to go from a sitting position to a standing one. Regularly, your computer suggests you some stretching exercises, so you don’t get muscle cramps.

And then there is « Fika »…

Fika is the best thing about Sweden so far, and it only stands in a cup of coffee and something to snack (pastry or little piece of bread with cheese). But what makes it so great, is that it is a sacred thing. Everyone stops working and gather to share this moment. But pictures are often better than words. Also, from now on, I’ll take a picture of different fika so you can see what it looks like.

Banoffee made for Lotta’s (mentor) departure - 29th of march - Borås

Vad pratar du för språk?

A Swedish friend warned me before I came to Sweden (Hej Linnea): It will be hard for you to practice Swedish because Swedes switch to English very easily. And she was right… In some way I am lucky, some people I am working with are not that fluent so they were kind of relieved when I asked them to speak Swedish with me, so I could practice. However, when I order something in Swedish, it happens pretty often that they answer in English… I have to work on my accent I guess. Blessed will be the day I get an answer in Swedish, I will take that as a sign of improvement.

I started SFI this week, (Swedish for Immigrants) and before that I learned through listening and observing. I also took some Swedish lessons to have some basics before coming, and it helped me a lot to improve without regular lessons here. (Some were provided but because of changing schedule and a lot of red days, I had only 4 or 5 lessons in 3 months).

I will give you updates about SFI and how it helps me to improve, and if it is an effective way to learn.

I think I should stop this article here, otherwise it will be too long. But I promise, I will come back with some tips and life experience that I think might help you if your goal is to come here and experience Swedish lifestyle.

Until then: ha det så bra !

Stenspiren - 23rd of February - Göteborg

Alex

#evsiboras #evs #sweden #europeanvoluntaryservice #erasmus #boras #alex

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betanwinbwinbonusbedingunge-blog · 7 years

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