#since I started there has been ONE time I got more then two days off in a row and I had to scrap and claw and beg and plead for that
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When You’re Gone
(Ex!Boyfriend!Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader)
Summary: You go to one of Eddie’s shows and see him for the first time since you broke up and he’s willing to do anything to win you back. WK: 5.8K
Warnings: Slight angst in the beginning, mention of heart break/break ups, Eddie was kind of dick before the break up but he’s sweet through this entire thing, pining, unprotected sex, fingering, sixty nine, just a lil bit of choking, fluff fluff fluff, lmk if I missed any! 18+MDNI!!
A/N: So I’ve been missing Eddie a lot, I’ve been thinking about writing for him again off and on but the fear that I have from being bullied in this fandom has stopped me. But I guess all it took for me to break was seeing that ASSS so, I offer you this. Idk when I’ll write ST again, maybe it’ll be consistent, maybe it won’t. I guess this is a bit of a trial run. I put my HEART into this, I really kind of poured everything I’ve been feeling the last few months into writing this so that makes me extra nervous. But I hope you guys like it, I love u🖤
You couldn’t believe you let Robin talk you into this. You hadn’t seen or talked to Eddie In months. Not since you stormed off the set of the music video he practically begged you to star in. He was being a gigantic snob the entire shoot. Telling you that “you weren’t doing it right” or “looks like we are going to have to shoot that again, can you get your head in the game, babe?” But the thing was your head was in the game and you were doing every single thing he asked exactly how he asked and yet it still wasn’t enough.
That was just the final straw. He had been acting like the sun revolved around him. Around his music. Around partying and blowing money just so he could brag about the shit he has. He started calling your friends and family back home less and less. Missing date nights. Forgetting anniversaries. He stopped telling you how beautiful you looked any chance he got and treating you like you were his everything because he had so much more than you now. Which you would never be upset about, you were and are still proud of him for every single thing he’s accomplished. But that problem was that he stopped being your Eddie almost entirely.
You hoped that it would pass, that it was just because it was all so new, the money, the fame, the adoration. But after almost two years it just continued to get worse and no matter how much you tried to bring it up to him he just reassured you time and time again that you meant everything to him. With no change. You couldn’t continue to give him everything while it felt like he virtually forgot you existed everyday. So you walked away, even though he was yelling after you, not because he wanted you to stay, but because he needed to get back on set and finish filming. You went back to your shared home, packed your things, and left.
Robin was more than happy to let you stay with her and her girlfriend while you got back on your feet. You couldn’t stay in L.A. without Eddie, he was all you had there. So you went back home to Indiana. To your friends and your family. Where you felt seen and you felt like you mattered again. But that didn’t take away the ache in your heart for him. The entire piece of you that felt like it was missing without him. Eddie had been a constant in your life since you were little.
You grew up together. You were both too stupid to get your heads out of your asses and admit how crazy you were about each other until you graduated highschool but you thought after that it would be forever. It’s always been you and him. You went through every phase, every hardship, every big life event with Eddie by your side. When him and the guys got that record deal you were more than happy to continue to stand by him through it all. But apparently he didn’t feel the same. Which felt like a stab in your chest day after day. You really did miss him so much. But you weren’t even sure if he missed you too.
Eddie was sweating fucking buckets. He hasn’t been this nervous for a show in over a year, going up in front of all those people was a walk in the park to him at this point. But knowing you were going to be here tonight changes everything. He wants it to be perfect. He’s been working on this song for you since you left, just hoping that he would have a chance to play it for you. He didn’t want you to hear it on the radio, no, he wants you to hear it directly from him. He wants to see your face after. He wants to tell you how sorry he is for losing sight of the only thing that made all of this worth it. He just wants you.
Not a day has gone by since you left that he didn’t feel empty. He couldn’t do anything without thinking of you. His favorite restaurants were your favorite restaurants. His favorite movies were your favorite movies too. Your side of the bed being empty made him feel so lonely that he started just passing out on the couch every night to avoid looking at it. He stopped going to parties. Hardly ever saw anyone unless he had to go to the studio or play a show. Tour was awful, you were by his side through their entire debut tour so doing it without you felt like doing it without one of his guitar strings, or his arm.
The fans could tell he was less engaged. His record label was on his ass and so were the guys. He just couldn’t seem to shake you. At this point none of it even feels like it matters if he can’t have you. You’re all he wants and if he has to do all of this without you, if this is what ruined the two of you, part of him doesn’t even want it. A big part. He’s thought about dropping everything and just flying home to beg at your doorstep. But each time he talked himself out of it, not even sure if you’d want to see him.
But tonight? You were going to be here at his show and this was his chance to win you back. He would give it all up for you in an instant, all you had to do was ask and he would do it, no matter what it was. So when Robin called him and asked him to set aside an extra ticket for you he felt like this was the universe giving him another shot. He just hoped you would too.
Your whole body was vibrating as you watched Eddie on stage, your heart felt like it was practically beating to the sound of his music, calling out to him. He looked good, really good, and as emotional as you are you still can’t deny the way your core throbs, and your thighs clench together at the sight of him. His hair was a perfect mess, the tattered at the knee jeans he was wearing fit him like a dream, and were reminiscent of the ones he used to wear, when he was your Eddie. Not the designer ones you’ve seen him in recently. He was wearing the battle vest you guys made in your first apartment before everything got chaotic and went to shit. With nothing under it. His tattooed chest and torso were on display and you noticed a few new additions. But your eyes nearly pop out of your head when they land on the little stick-n-poke heart with your initials in the middle that you gave him when you were 18 was touched up.
You can’t tear your eyes away from it for a good thirty seconds, just as they start to well up with tears you snap yourself out of it, looking up at his face again. This time locking eyes with him for the first time in nearly six months. Eddie’s soft chocolate eyes go wide and his fingers falter on the strings for half a second before he fucking smirks at you right as he picks up on the chorus. He keeps his eyes on you for the rest of the song, before announcing that they only had a few left.
Eddie is trying to focus on the crowd, focus on his chords, focus on anything but you, but it’s damn near impossible. His eyes just keep traveling back to you because he missed you so much, because you looked so fucking beautiful standing in the very front row under the stage lights and you were looking at him in a way that gave him hope. He made eye contact with a few fans, reached down to touch their hands, but no matter what he did he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. When it came time to announce the second to last song he felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest. His eyes lingered on yours for a moment before turning to address the crowd.
“Hey guys.” Cheers erupt all around you and Eddie smiles, flipping his sweaty hair back, making you and probably every other girl in the room swoon. “Thanks for coming out tonight, you’ve been fucking awesome. This next song is… well, it’s a new song. I mean, it’s new to you guys, I’ve been working on it for a while. So there’s this girl…” His eyes lock with yours again and your heart beats somehow even faster. “She’s here tonight and I really fucked things up with her, obviously some shitty song isn’t gonna erase all of that. But I guess this is just kind of my way of trying to make up for it. Or at least starting to.”
As the band plays the opening notes of the song you immediately notice it’s a lot slower and more melodic than their usual songs. They have a few other songs like this, love songs that Eddie wrote about you, happy ones. But this is nothing like that, especially when Eddie starts to sing. He never takes his eyes off of you as the lyrics fall from his lips, lyrics about how sorry he is, how badly he fucked up, how he misses you so much he feels like his soul is missing. He pours his heart out to you as his deep voice filled with longing fills the venue.
You can’t stop the silent tears that stream down your face, unable to tear your eyes away from his for even a second. Eddie Munson, the love of your life, the beautiful boy who you got to watch turn into an even more beautiful man, is standing in front of thousands of people practically begging you for another chance. And it’s like every dream you’ve had since you left coming true. All you wanted was for him to come back to you and apologize, maybe beg a little. You might be an idiot for holding out hope that he would, but you always knew in your heart that you’d take him back if he did. It might take some time for you to fully trust him again, but if he’s willing to try so are you.
As the song comes to an end Eddie thanks everyone, making the crowd go crazy. Then he announces that the next song will be their last before looking down at you again. The flashing lights dance over the tears streaming down your cheeks but you’re smiling at him and it makes his heart soar. And when you blow him a kiss that he of course catches, putting it close to his heart like he has a million times, he feels like a dorky teenager in love with his best friend again. He watches you disappear into the crowd and his heart falls, almost forgetting that he was even on stage performing, all he could see was you. He could hardly focus through the last song, hastily thanking everyone for coming because he was absolutely terrified that you left without even giving him a chance to talk to you face to face.
You push through the sea of sweaty bodies until you get to the far end of the stage, stopping in front of the security guard, who of course recognized you and let you pass without even glancing at the bracelet on your wrist. You run over to Robin, practically knocking her over.
“Whoa! Slow down dude, are you okay? That was… a lot.” Robin grabs onto your shoulders to center you, her eyes laced with concern.
“Yeah, I’m good, I’m uh - I’m gonna go wait for Eddie in his dressing room.” You bite your lip nervously, avoiding eye contact with her, scared of her reply.
“Oh thank god! I can’t wait to tell Steve the plan worked!” Robin’s eyes go wide as her hand comes to cover her mouth. “I meaaan…”
“You know what? I’m going to bug you about this later, but right now I have to go.”
“Yesss!!! Go get your man!!!”
You snort as you turn away from her, rushing down the hall until you see the door with Eddie’s name on it. You pace the room a few times before sitting down on the black leather couch, bouncing your leg so hard it makes the legs shake. The air feels especially humid as your nerves course through your body, the material of the couch sticking to your bare thighs with each bounce of your knee. You can’t stop messing with your hair, adjusting your top, fiddling your fingers. It’s probably only been ten minutes but it feels like it’s been an eternity when the door finally pushes open.
“Princess” Eddie stands in the doorway, looking stunned. His eyes are wide, and filled with adoration as his large ringed hand comes to rest against his chest. “Hi.”
“Hi Eddie.” You smile at him softly as you let out an almost dreamy sigh. “I liked your song.”
“Yeah?” He takes a few steps forward until there’s only a few feet between you. “I missed you. I’m so sorry, I was such a fucking idiot. I can’t believe I let you walk away.”
His eyes are sad as he casts them down, looking at his fingers as he fiddles with his rings. A classic tell tale sign that Eddie was nervous.
“And I totally get it if you don’t want anything to do with me still, I fucked up. Bad.”
“Eddie…” you sigh, standing up to close the remaining distance between you. You grab onto his hands, stopping his movements as you look up into his eyes. “Look at me.”
When he looks you in the eyes again his own are brimmed with tears, and his lip is quivering. And even though you’re still upset with him, all you want to do is comfort him. It was like second nature to you.
“I love you.” You say it so plainly, so matter of fact that it makes the tears flow down his cheeks, a heavy sob escape his chest. You grab onto his cheeks, pulling his forehead down to rest against yours. “I love you Eddie.”
“I love you. I love you so much. I miss you everyday. None of this is worth it without you. Everything feels so dull. Everything I do reminds me of you.” His hands come to rest over top of yours as his tears continue to flow, tears of your own now streaming down your face. “Please just give me a chance to make it up to you, sweetheart. I’ll do anything. I’ll leave it all behind. Never touch my guitar again. Cut off my arm. Anything.”
“Well, you don’t have to go doing all of that…” you chuckle, tilting your chin so you can connect his lips with your own. You pour everything into that kiss, your love for him, your hurt, your anger, your longing. And he does the same. Kissing you like he would die if he didn’t. You only pull away when you absolutely need to take a breath of air. Foreheads still connected as you pant against each other's lips, just inches apart.
“God I missed your lips, princess.” Eddie runs his hands down your face, cupping your jaw. “Missed every part of you.”
“I missed you too Eddie, god.” You kiss him again, this time running your tongue across his plush bottom lip. He immediately grants you access, intertwining your tongues with a groan. Your fingers come up to lace through his curls, and tug causing him to moan into your mouth. His hands travel down your body, resting on your hips, his thumbs just grazing that bit of skin between your top and your skirt. You push yourself further against him, moaning when his hands move to grab your ass.
“Baby, wait, don’t you think we should talk more?” He pulls away breathlessly tilting his head back so he can look at you.
“Later. We can talk later.” You take a few steps back, stumbling a little on your heeled boots as the backs of your knees hit the couch, you plop down, pulling Eddie down with you. He puts his hands on the back of the cushions on either side of your head so he can lean down over you, his face inches from yours, his hair almost acting like a curtain around you, shielding you from the outside world. “Kiss me again, please.”
“You don’t gotta beg, princess, I told you I’d do anything, didn’t I?” He smirks at you as kisses you again, slipping his tongue into your mouth. You moan as your fingers desperately grasp onto the sides of his vest, pulling him closer.
“Touch me, Eddie.” You whimper, leaning back to look up at him through your lashes, your lips are kiss swollen and your lipstick is all but nothing at this point.
“Baby, are you sure you don’t want to talk before we-“
“Eddie, I appreciate your chivalry, I really do. But you said anything, right? I want, need, to feel your fingers again, please.” And how could he resist you, when you’re looking at him like that? And your skirt is pushed so far up your legs he can see your little lace panties, his favorite pair, if he isn’t mistaken. He would literally lick the bottom of your boots if you asked him to.
“I told you that you don’t have to beg, doll, I’m the one that should be begging for the privilege of being able to touch you.” He smirks, planting a sloppy kiss on your lips before kissing down your jaw, to your throat, leaving little nips along the way. “Missed this body so much.”
One of his hands grabs onto the top of your thigh, his thumb running over your slit through the thin lace of your panties pulling a soft moan from your lips.
“Missed this pussy so much.” He grazes over your clit before applying light pressure, rubbing circles on it with the pad of his thumb. “You’re so wet for me already, your body missed me too, huh sweetheart?”
“Yes, missed you so much, baby.” You pull him down further so that his free hand is resting on the cushion next to you and his neck and jaw were close enough to kiss and suck bruises into. “Mine, mine, mine.”
“All yours.” He chuckles as pushes your panties to the side, circling two fingers around your entrance and curling them upwards, stroking them against your sweet spot immediately. “Oh, you’re so fucking tight, practically sucking me in.”
“My fingers were never be as good as yours - ohmyfuckinggod.” A loud moan rips through you and your head falls back against the couch as he starts to thrust his fingers quickly in and out of your dripping hole. His thumb finds your clit, circling it in time with his fingers as his lips attach to your neck, giving you a mark of his own.
“Never have to live without them again if you don’t want to, I’ll worship this pussy everyday until I die if you’ll let me.” Eddie kisses down your chest, using his free hand to push your little tank top and bra down, freeing your tits. He kisses across the tops of them, leaving gentle open mouth kisses on both your peaked nipples before licking between the valley of them. He slides his tongue over so he can latch onto one of your nipples and it sends you over the edge.
“Ohhh fuck! Eddie! I’m cumming, I’m fucking cumming.” Your pussy clenches around his fingers as he continues to thrust them deep and fast into you.
“Yeah, that’s it, baby girl, cum for me. You look so fucking beautiful.” He kisses your cheek before leaning up and pulling his fingers from you. He holds eye contact with you as he sucks them into his mouth with a groan. “Just as sweet as I remember.”
“Eddie, please fuck me, I need you.” Your legs are still spread, your glistening pussy practically calling his name, framed perfectly by those little panties that he loves so much like a work of fucking art. The way your shirt and bra are pushed down under your tits is making them look irresistible. He leans down, resting both of his hands on your knees, and smiles at you in a way that makes your stomach flip.
“You have no idea how fucking badly I want you right now, but can I take you back to my hotel? I wanna take my take with you.” He nuzzles his nose against yours before sliding it along your cheek, placing a soft kiss there.
“Okay, yeah, that sounds good.” You’re breathless and so fucking horny but the idea of getting to fuck Eddie in a bed, where you would be totally alone, sounded a lot more appealing than fucking him in a dressing room where anyone could walk in.
You grab onto Eddie’s vest and push it off his body the minute the door to his hotel room is shut behind you. You take his face in your hands, your eyes shining as you look up at him while you rub your thumbs across his temples.
“You’re so beautiful Eddie.” You coo at him, running your hands down his chest.
“I like your new tattoos… and this.” You run your pointer finger across the band of his pants before tracing the little heart on his hip. “When did you do this?”
“Uh - A few weeks ago.” He grabs the hand tracing along his hip and takes it in his own, bringing it up to his lips so he can place a gentle kiss on the back of it. “I was getting this other tattoo and my artist asked if I wanted to cover it up. I laughed at him and told him to touch it up instead.”
“Eddie… you feel heat rise in your cheeks as butterflies erupt in your stomach. “I want you so bad.”
“Yeah, pretty girl? I told you I’m all yours.” He grabs onto your hips, pulling you back toward the bed so he can sit on the edge of it with you between his spread legs. “Gonna worship this body, show you how much I missed you.”
He grips onto your shoulders rubbing them gently for a moment before hooking his fingers in the straps of your bra and tank top, pulling them down your shoulders. He leans forward, kissing along your bare collar bone as one of his hands snakes around under your skirt to grab a hand full of your ass.
“Missed these perfect tits.” He takes them in his hands, squeezing them, before he grabs onto the hem of your shirt and pulls it over your head. He reaches behind you to undo your bra, his fingertips gently gliding over your skin with each touch. He took his time taking your skirt off, kissing every inch of exposed skin he could until you were completely bare before him. “So fucking perfect, baby doll.” He grips onto your ass looking up at you with his bottom lip between his teeth. “Need to taste that sweet pussy.”
“Take your pants off first.” You reach forward and undo his belt before working on his button and zipper, popping them open to reveal his thick cock covered by the material of his boxers. He lifts his hips so you can pull them down to his ankles and you bend down to unlace his boots.
“Fuck, you look so sexy, makes me think about that time I made you hump my boot…” Eddie smirks down at you as he takes your face in his palm and runs his thumb along your bottom lip. It makes your pussy flutter around nothing.
“Yeah, that was one of the hottest things you’ve ever done, if I’m being honest.” You giggle before flicking your tongue out to run it along the pad of his digit.
“Jesus Christ, get up here before I bust from just looking at you.” Eddie grabs your hand, pulling you back up to your feet before kicking his pants off the rest of the way. He lays back on the bed, patting his chest. “Sit on my face, princess. Your throne missed you.”
You stand there for a moment, just looking at him. He keeps telling you how perfect you are but he doesn’t even realize how truly perfect he is. The way he was smiling at you like you hung the stars, his ink covered arms that are more toned now than when you were younger, along with his more broad chest that’s now nearly covered in tattoos. Your eyes travel down his torso to his happy trail, the v lines on his hips, and settle on the way that his cock is straining in his boxers. He was lying there, so perfect, calling his face your throne, and he is just so your Eddie.
“You good, sweetheart? Or are you hypnotized by my otherworldly handsomeness?” Eddie wiggles his eyebrows at you, leaning back on his elbows. You know he’s trying to be goofy but it only makes you even more desperate for him. You climb onto the bed to straddle him, your bare pussy resting on top of his cock, only separated by the thin material of his boxers.
“Yeah, I just really fucking need you.” You grind down on him, pulling a groan from him as you lean down to lick across his lips, sucking on the bottom one before pulling away with a pop.
“Fuck, get up here, now.”
He pats his chest and his tone has you clenching around nothing. He grips onto your ass, jiggling it in his hands before landing a smack on one of your cheeks. You moan as you scoot up so that your thighs are resting on either side of his head with your pussy hovering just over his mouth. Eddie wraps his arms around your legs, pulling you down so he can bury his face in between your legs. He licks a long stripe along your wet slit before circling your clit with his tongue.
“Oh - fuckingshit - feels so good.” You moan as he shoves his tongue as deep as he can inside you, flicking it against your inner walls.
“Yeah, that’s my good girl, missed this sweet fucking pussy so much.” He swirls his tongue inside you before he brings it up to your clit again, licking it with the flat of his tongue. He sucks your clit and your pussy lips into his mouth, causing your eyes to roll back.
“That’s so fucking good, yeah, eat my fucking pussy.” You lean back resting your hands on his thighs as you start to grind down on his face. You bring one of your hands to his cock, stroking him through his boxers, chasing him to moan even louder into your pussy. “Fuck, Eddie, I wanna taste you.”
You push yourself up off of his face and he looks up at you with a pout but before he can even protest you’re throwing one of your legs over his head so you can flip around and straddle his face reverse cowgirl.
“Oh jesusfuckingchrist, baby.” Eddie groans, grabbing onto both of your ass cheeks and jiggling the meat of them in his hands. You hook your fingers in the band of his boxers so you can pull his cock free, spitting on your palm and taking it in your hand. “Fuck.”
“Need to taste you too, baby.” You lean down, flicking your tongue out to leave little kitten licks on his tip before sucking it between your lips.
“God damn, princess, fucking missed your mouth so much.” Eddie moans as he uses his grip on your ass to pull your pussy down on his face again, burying his tongue deep inside.
You take him further down your throat, swirling your tongue around his shaft and using your hand to stroke what isn’t in your mouth. Eddie eats your pussy like a man starved, bringing his lips to your clit as he inserts two of his thick fingers inside you.
“Yes, yes, that’s so good, you’re gonna make me cum.” You pull off of him continuing to use your hand to stroke his spit soaked cock. He picks up the speed of his fingers as he sucks on your clit even harder. “Oh god - I’m - I’m fucking cumming!”
Your walls clench around his fingers and your thighs squeeze around his head as your high washes over you, loud moans and the sound of your wet pussy filling the room. Eddie doesn’t stop until you’re pulling off of him because it becomes too much. He grips onto your hips, flipping you over into your back before covering your body with his own. He connects your lips in a heated kiss, his lips and chin still slick with your wetness as you taste yourself in his tongue.
“Need to be inside of you, fuck.”
“Yes, please please fuck me, I need to feel you.” Eddie uses one hand to grip onto the base of his cock, running the tip through your folds before pushing it inside you. “Oh, god.”
“Shit baby, you’re so fucking tight, so fucking wet.” Eddie grunts as he bottoms out inside of you, pushing his hips flush against yours before pulling almost all the way out and slamming into you even harder. He starts to fuck you hard and fast, one of his hands on your hip while the other wraps around your neck just tightly enough.
“Yeah, fucking choke me, missed your hands around my throat, missed you, fuck.” Eddie picks up the pace, his hips smack loudly against yours as the hand on your hips moves down so he can rub circles in your clit.
“Fuck, baby girl, missed you too, missed this fucking pussy. Gonna fill you up, need you to cum for me.” The hand around your throat squeezes just a little tighter as his lips crash against yours. Your hands are gripping onto his shoulders so tight you wouldn’t be surprised if your nails break the skin. His circles on your clit never let up as he tilts his hips so he’s hitting your sweet spot just right.
“Oh - my fucking - fuck, I’m cumming I’m fucking cumming.” Your pussy squeezes him like a vise grip as you run your nails down his back.
“Gonna cum too, baby, gonna fill this pussy up so good. Never quitting you. Gonna marry you someday.” Eddie’s thrusts grow sloppy until he’s pushing his hips flush against yours and emptying inside of you. He buries his face in your neck, rocking his hips slowly as he rides out his high. He lets his body rest on top of yours, placing gentle kisses on your neck. You bring your hands to his head and lace your fingers through his hair so you can lightly scratch his scalp.
“I love you, Eddie.” You sigh, dreamily. “I know we have some stuff to work through, and talk about, but I’d really like to make it work. You really wanna marry me someday?”
“What!” Eddie pushes up on his hands, so he can look at you, a big goofy smile on his face. “Of course I wanna fucking marry you! It’s only been the plan since we were 8 and I gave you that ring I won with arcade tickets.”
“I just… I don’t know, I thought maybe you got sick of me and that’s why…”
“Baby…” Eddie’s voice suddenly sounds a little sad, maybe guilty. “That was never… I would never, fuck. Hold on.”
He gets up off the bed so he can find his vest, he picks it up off the ground and pulls something from the pocket before coming back to sit next to you on the bed.
“Can you sit up for me?” You sit up in front of him, looking at him with a raised eyebrow and a pout on your lips. “I got this… well, I got this a few months before you left and I was just waiting for the right time, ya know? And honestly it never came because I had my head so up my own ass that I wasn’t making the time. But uh - I want you to have it. Even if you don’t say yes, I got it for you, so it’s yours…”
He opens his hand to reveal a little black square box and when he opens it, sitting inside is the most beautiful ring you’ve ever seen. Set in the middle is a big shiny ruby, bracketed by two little bat wings on each side that lead into the band. It was perfect, you’ve been telling him practically your whole lives that if someone proposed to you with a boring ass dimond you would say no, no matter how big it was.
“Eddie…” Your eyes well up with tears as your bottom lip quivers. “Is that really for me?”
“Princess.” He chuckles, reaching a hand out to wipe away a stray tear that escaped. “Of course it’s for you. It’s always been you. And it always will be. Even if you don’t want me back.”
“Eddie, I - yes.” You smile widely at him, wrapping your hand around his wrist so you can turn your head to place a kiss there. “It’s always you, you’re the only one for me. You have a lot of making up to do… and it might take me some time to get fully over all of this but… I still wanna marry you. It’s you and me, till the day we die, stab a goblin in the eye.”
“Yeah baby.” He chuckles, a few tears of his own streaming down his face. You still wanted him. You were going to take his ring. You were sitting here in front of him more beautiful and grown than ever, repeating the words that you had said to each other as kids more times than he could count. “Till the day we die.”
He pulls the ring from the box and you offer him your left hand so he can slide it on your finger. You both smile widely and teary eyed at each other as he pulls you into a kiss. This one is different, this one is full of promise and hope and it’s like coming home. He rests his forehead against yours as he rubs the apples of your cheeks with his thumbs.
“Stab a goblin in the eye.” He chuckles, smiling widely as he places another gentle kiss on your lips.
Taglist: @littlexdeaths @babygorewhore @eddiesxangel @voyeurmunson @rowanswriting @hippiegoth97 @jenniquinn @take-everything-you-can
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson smut#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson#Eddie Munson angst#eddie munson x reader smut#eddie munson x you#Eddie Munson fluff#Dolly writes#divider by me
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✮ꜜ : ❛ now i see daylight : spencer reid x fem! reader
pairing: spencer reid x fem! reader
summary: three weeks have gone by since your last encounter with reid. you'd both been doing an exceptional job of pretending that the other didn't exist. you felt like it was only fair. he didn't have the right to talk to you any type of way, and you supposed in his mind, you didn't have the right to behave so jealously. three weeks of no ground being made, that is, of course, until a conversation with rossi helps to screw your head on straight
content warnings: love confessions. reader definitely has anxiety and a fear of romance/relationships, BUT she fights her fear! i also think it's fair to say that she views telling spencer about her feelings as facing her fear, regardless of his response! this is part two to 'guilt is a motherfucker'.... i'm so sorry it's taken forever, but i've actually preparing to enlist in the army && haven't had a lot of down time. i've got 10 drafts to prove it, but i tried my best to make this longer than part one, and i hope that you guys enjoy it.
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Grow up.
Those words had haunted you for about three weeks. It'd been that long since the day you and Spencer had sort of... drifted apart. You refused to blame yourself, despite knowing full well this whole ordeal was majorly your fault. Okay, all of the blame very well rested on your shoulders, but you were stubborn. You'd been that way forever.
Maybe you were the childish, scared, and jealous little girl he'd accused you of being. That wasn't your job to figure out, because he had no business speaking to you that way. Who did he think he was? You could hit him right in his stupid little face. That last thought of violence seems to follow you.
Especially as you sat as your desk, leg bouncing furiously underneath as you counted the seconds until he was away from the kitchenette. Your cup of coffee was dwindling, and you still had a few more files to get through, before you'd give yourself room to slack off. You needed more caffeine, but the newfound thorn in your side was taking up space, using up all the sugar as he made his third cup of the day.
A more mature person might have questioned why you didn't just go up there anyway. He didn't own the kitchenette, and it wasn't like you had to say anything at all. It was meant to be cut-and-dry, you were both mature adults, you could interact as such. Except neither of you were quite as mature as you affronted. You could just picture the screwed up expression he'd offer you if you chose to approach.
You were certain your face was already twisted up, showing off your own annoyance, and he wasn't even near you.
You'd been berated by Derek, Emily, and Penelope over your petty streak, all three parties really driving in the point that you were behaving like a toddler throwing a tantrum. They had a point, but you also refused to accept any such criticism about your behavior. Partly, because you hated correction, and you didn't want to think about the possibility that all of your friends were on his side.
But you think most of your refusal to accept your part from any of them had a lot to do with the fact that they weren't the ones who'd been so callously humiliated, and they weren't the ones with feelings for someone who obviously knew, and was perfectly content flaunting such knowledge right in your face.
God, you could punt him like a football.
You needed to work on your insult creativity, these were starting to get repetitive. You shake all thoughts of assault out of your mind as Dave begins to approach your desk. Rossi wasn't stupid, he like everyone else had noticed the significant decline in attention passed between you, and Reid. But unlike the rowdier members of the team, he and JJ had elected to go the route of silent but deadly.
They'd cast the both of you disapproving looks when in rare form you'd allowed your spat to affect your job. Their clear disappointment in you exceptionally loud. Times like those were sparce, you really only ever objected obedience when Hotch insisted on partnering the both of you up. Which had luckily become much more rare in the last few weeks.
"Still pouting, angioletto?" he asks, and his ability to read right through you seems to make your pout deepen. "It's been three weeks, don't you think it's time to talk about it or move on?" he questions, and there's no judgement there. It's what you like the most about Rossi, he seemed to have fallen into the role of paternal figure incredibly well. He gave you the tough love that you often needed.
But he never disrespected your boundaries, he never went too far. He'd always say just enough to nudge you in the right direction.
"Maybe." you agree, and it's true. You know it's time to put this situation behind you in one way or another, but you refused to cave first. You didn't want to give Spencer the satisfaction of it, and once again you're made aware of just how petty you really were. "But I don't want to." you voice this thought to Dave, who offers an unamused expression. You narrow your eyes in his direction.
"He's the one that started it..." you exclaim your side for the umpteenth time. Rossi's expression doesn't morph, but there is a bit of disappointment swimming in his eyes. It makes you avert your gaze quickly, you could feel the first pinpricks of guilt slicing at you. "It's true." you insist. Rossi waves a tired hand at you, ushering you to proceed, and you find yourself grateful for the chance to vent.
Everyone else knew too much about the behind the scenes to let you get a word in edgewise. Rossi was basically a clean slate. "If he knew all along, what he thinks he knows..." you stop long enough to look towards the kitchenette. He's still there, which is a relief, you'd be pissed if somehow he managed to overhear this. "Then why would he come over here and flaunt it. Was he trying to rub it in?" you demand.
Silly you for thinking that Rossi would be any less on your ass than the rest of the team. He was David Rossi after all, one of the founders of the BAU, a smart man that could read you like a picture book. "You finished?" he asks, and your mouth parts. You weren't finished, but you don't tell him that, he looked like he was ready to lecture. You offer a curt nod, and he hums under his breath.
"What exactly were you expecting from him, Y/N?" he asks, and you blanche. You weren't expecting anything, you'd never expected anything from Spencer. "I mean just stick with me here... put yourself in his shoes for one second." he prompts, and you huff. Those were big shoes, probably uncomfortable. Still, you play along as you wait for Rossi to proceed. "Would you wait around for two years for someone to finally realize that they want to be with you?" he asks.
You hope that it's rhetorical, because the answer for you was probably a lot different than the one he was expecting. You also feel the urge to correct him, you didn't take two years to figure out you liked him, you'd known since your first day. Your issue was verbalizing it, because you cared about your bond. Spencer was nice, he was the sweetest person you'd ever met. You liked seeing him get excited about the things no one else seemed to care about. He was different.
He was your friend, and you had always admired him.
"I wasn't making him wait..." you voice the correction. "And I didn't need time to realize anything..." you trail off, and realization seems to set in for Rossi. He sighs deeply, head shaking as you continue on your tangent. "I liked him back when all the girls in the unit still looked at him like he was some freak, and I'm not saying it entitles me to anything... I'm the dummy for being a chicken, but he didn't have to be so mean." and you're certain that's the root of it all.
Your feelings were hurt.
"Ah, well haven't you heard? Boys are quite stupid." Rossi offers, and you think he only said it to get you to laugh. It works, because you do chuckle, and it makes Dave's shoulders relax just slightly. "Talk to him, Y/N." he presses, and you find yourself looking across the bullpen. "It's the right thing to do." and you know he's right. "And who knows, it might even wind up being for the best." he offers, and you blanch. You nod your head, and Rossi beams proudly.
"You're right." you agree audibly, and you're fidgeting in your chair.
"You are coming this Friday aren't you?" Rossi pries, and you've gone nonverbal, head nodding once more as he mimics your action. "See if you guys can't get this squared away before then, won't you?" he asks, and he's leaving you with a gentle pat on the shoulder. You stare after Rossi with a mixture of disdain and appreciation. Leave it to the old man to get you off your ass. Your eyes are drawn to Spencer as he draws closer, you know he's not coming to you.
It was a byproduct of your desk location, but it wouldn't hurt to use it to your advantage. When he's within earshot, you take the first step. "Spence?" you try, and you expect him to ignore you, to keep walking like the sassy bastard that he is, but he shocks you. He seems to mirror your feelings with his own surprised expression. "Can we talk?" you try, and it's the cliche thing... but you don't have it in you to be poetic. He stops abruptly, head nodding stiffly as he does so.
You feel like you need to stand up, having him stand over you feels too much like you're being cornered or something of the sort. He takes a small step back when you do so though, and the tension seems to only grow tenfold. You mask your disappointment in his retreat easily, instead standing up a bit straighter, sticking your chin out as you prepare to bite the bullet and be the bigger woman. It was utterly humiliating having to bring yourself back to Earth like this.
"Sure." he finally verbally answers your question, you take that as a cue to get on with it. Your patience for back and forth seemed almost as thin as his.
"Maybe it's three weeks too late..." you begin, and his eyebrows furrow. "And I know we've got this new rhythm of pretending we don't exist to each other," and his face betrays how wrong he finds that statement. His face pinches up like he's smelled something bad, and he wants to remind you that the only reason you hadn't spoken was because you hadn't had the guts to own up to the fact that you had feelings for him, but he digresses. He wasn't here to pick a fight.
"But, I'm sorry...." you spit the apology out and it feels hollow. You know you have to do better, so you proceed before he can shoot you a disapproving glance. "I really am." you insist, and despite the fact that you had only just begun to feel guilty about the whole thing in the last few minutes, you meant it. "I never should've acted like that, and I never should have let this go on for so long." you express.
Across the bullpen, Rossi, Penelope, Derek, and Emily are huddled up watching the exchange, not so discreetly. You're none the wiser to your growing audience, but Spencer sees them clearly. Not that they were really aiming for subtlety. "It's not my business what you do outside of work or who you do it with." and your nose curls, mostly because you want it to be your business. You want to be valid in your aggravation, more than that you wanted to be his. How annoying.
Your leg starts to shake just barely, and you look like you'll crumble to the ground at any moment. Spencer notices all of these ticks, and stores them into the part of his brain that's full of things specific to you. "So I'm sorry that I was being a jerk." you offer, and Spencer's face doesn't show any signs of whether or not he believed you, so you continue. "I'm happy for you." you clear your throat, and feel embarrassment setting in.
"Thanks, Y/N." his head tips to the right as he appraises you, his eyes narrowing slightly as he takes you in. It's not a menacing sort of glance. He seemed to be waiting for something else, you weren't sure what more could be put into your apology, there was no way you were about to give an outright confession, that'd be humiliating. Instead, you avert your gaze, and it seems to be enough of an answer to whatever internal question he had. "That actually means a lot."
You don't smile, mostly because you're not sure what the actually means, he seems to notice the way your expression changes just slightly, and he's quick to correct himself.
"I just mean that your approval does mean a lot to me." he says, and you relax. You can't quite beam, you're still not up for it, but you offer a small smile, one that could count more as a grimace than anything else, but you weren't in the headspace to monitor your facial expressions. You were growing bothered all over again, and you had to do everything in your power to ensure that this time things didn't end with another three-week break between you and Spencer.
"Really?"
Spencer's nose curls now, he's an expressive guy. His facials said a lot more than his words could at times, and you note that this particular expressions reads somewhere between confused and surprised. Those were almost synonyms in the grand scheme of things, right? "Is that a real question?" Spencer asks, and despite the tension that hung over you at the start of the conversation, with this question you witness the way his guard drops. It was liberating in a way.
"I asked it didn't I?" you quip, but there's no real bite behind your words. Spencer seems to note this, lips pressing together firmly.
"You're important to me." he promises, and you hate that his first reaction is to validate you. Your anxiety-riddled mind would convince you that he secretly thought you were fishing for praise, which was the farthest thing from the truth. Still, you love Spencer, platonically and otherwise, and you're certain that's why you're mimicking his words back to him so quickly.
"You're important to me too."
He takes a second to stare at you, and you stare right back. You're careful not to show any signs of timidity or awkwardness, things were finally starting to look up. "I..." he begins, and you stay silent to allow him the time he needs to get whatever was on his chest off. "I'm sorry." he says, and you're surprised. It was the last thing you'd expected from this conversation, you're certain your surprise is evident plain as day on your face.
"Yeah?" you feel it's only fair to press him onward.
"Jealous little girl." he cringes as he repeats it, and you wince because it still hurts. "That was-" he shakes his head. "It was out of line. Plain and simple, I guess I was just a little frustrated, but that's not your fault. It wasn't fair of me to come at you in that way." he begins to ramble. "I wouldn't want you to feel... mocked or belittled by me." and you blink. Mostly because that was exactly how you had felt, but how did he know. It's then that you finally feel the beady-eyed stares.
You look over your shoulder just in time to witness the group dispersing, Penelope grasping a file in her hand as she scurried in the opposite direction. Derek picking up a file folder, and Emily focusing all her attention on the drink sloshing around her mug. You really hate profilers, this is the loudest thought in your head as you turn back to Spencer. "It doesn't matter if I felt justified then, or even if I feel justified about it now." and it makes you snort.
Classic Spence.
"D-Do you forgive me? Are we okay?" he asks, and his voice has grown a bit fainter. If you listen hard enough you hear the echoes of the Spencer you first met. Even with all his strides, and the confidence he gained, there was still that small part of him that felt like the nerdy boy that everyone overlooked. The one that talked too much, and was constantly silenced with looks or snide remarks whenever he rambled for too long about some niche subject.
You think this train of thought is what gets you to see Rossi's point of view. And who were you to get in the way of someone who clearly was ready for someone as amazing as Spencer. You didn't know much about the woman, aside from the fact that she was constantly making coffee, and staring at Spencer. You didn't know how long she'd worked at the bureau, you didn't even know her name, but you knew that she was brave. She knew what she wanted and got it.
Unlike you.
You suppose 'snooze you lose' is your burden to carry from this ordeal. At least you'd gotten your friend back though. And that was enough, it could be anyway. You nod your head at his question, offering a half smile. "We're okay, Spence." you promise, and he seems relieved. His smile is one of those rare ones, the gorgeous kind that Spencer reserved for special occasions. He then visibly and audibly lets out a quiet sound of relief, and it makes you relax.
"Hey, Spence, can I get your help?" JJ is calling, and your pulled from your bubble. The world is still spinning, there's still work to do, pressing matters that needed your attention. You felt a little lighter, offering another half smile as he offers you a sheepish glance. He's heading towards JJ as you sit back down at your desk. Your leg bounces despite the perceived 'win'. It only takes you a moment to wonder why, reality sets in, and you realize your shortcomings.
You'd failed the test twice.
Twice you'd had the chance to be the most open and honest with Spencer, only to let your nerves or fear of rejection get in the way. The jealousy is gone now though, instead replaced with a brief feeling of self-aggravation. You hear Dave's stern voice in your head. 'Talk to him, Y/N.' and you frown. Hadn't that been what you'd done? You'd talked to him, so why did you still feel so bummed.
Why don't you just talk to the guy? Look him in the eye and tell him straight up how you're feeling? Derek's question from three weeks prior slaps you like a ton of bricks. You supposed that was the end goal, wasn't it? The only way to relieve yourself of all this anxiety and all the big feelings you were having a hard time digesting. You're back to pouting, mostly because you've got no idea where to start.
You pick up one of your files, and flip it open, hoping to bury yourself in work. Every time your mind tried to stray to Spencer or your feelings, you'd switch files, until all twenty-five on your desk had a dent in them. Your hand was cramped, and you know that soon enough you'll need a cup of coffee. Emily approaches your desk, hands centered as she leans forward, eyes right on you.
"So how did it go?" she asks, and you cut your eyes at her. "Tension's all gone, so it must have gone well, right?" she's grinning down at you. "I told you if you told him the truth, you'd have nothing to worry about." Emily proceeds, and you're shaking your head back and forth.
"Emily... Emily, no!" you exclaim, and her smile drops.
"No? What do you mean, no?" she demands as you exhale.
"I still haven't told him, and I'd really appreciate it, if you'd lower your voice." you hiss as she pouts. "Maybe it's just not supposed to be." you shrug, and Emily looks visibly disgruntled with your thoughts. "I'm just saying... we're okay, because we apologized." you explain. "I don't want to risk making it awkward again, because I think I have feelings." and now you're being purposely dismissive.
"Oh, so now you're not sure?" Emily questions, and then she's clicking her tongue against her teeth. "No. I don't buy that." she denies, and she's stern, but discrete. "Don't do this, Y/N. Don't be that girl." she pleads. "There's nothing worse than regret. It eats at you until there's nothing left, you don't want to look back, and think 'what if!'" and that's twice you're hearing something of the sort. Wasn't there some quote about hearing important things twice? You're not sure.
"If you like him-" she pauses, head still shaking from side to side. "If you love him... like it seems, you owe it to yourself to tell him. What's the worst thing that could happen?" she questions, and you scoff. "No, realistically." she insists. "Realistically tell me what the worst thing could be? And not from that place where your irrational fears sit." she deadpans, and you feel attacked, it makes you look away.
"In the two years of you knowing Reid, do you actually think that he's the kind of guy to break you down to nothing if he doesn't feel the same?" she asks, and the answer when presented to you like this is no. "So tell me what it is that you're really scared of?" she presses, and you don't understand why everyone's so worked up over this. Why the whole unit seemed to be invested in you expressing your feelings.
"I don't want to mess it up..." you shrug your shoulders. "I don't want to make it weird." you offer, and Emily's unmoved by your answer.
"You managed to do that without saying a thing." she retorts, and you feel like you've got no room to speak, no voice to rebuttal with. "Let me be your shrink for a second." Emily is your friend for moments like these, where her clear allegiance to you shines through. "Talk to me." she prompts.
"Why are you so invested in this?" you inquire. "Why does it even matter?" you huff.
"Because it matters to you." she answers. "What? You didn't know that's how this team works?" she asks, and you huff out a puff of air through your nose. "This isn't about us playing matchmaker... it's about you realizing that you've got a few bad beliefs about romance... and friendships.... and relationships that are going to keep you all by yourself if you don't start speaking your mind." she shrugs.
"And despite the way you curl into yourself back here at your desk, we both know you don't really want to be alone." and you think you might cry, it makes you wince. "You owe it to yourself to try, but ultimately the decision is all yours. I just think you'll feel better if you take Reid aside, and tell him the truth about how you feel." she seems done, and you don't know how to respond. Emily pats your shoulder as she rounds your desk, before heading back across the unit.
You really hate profilers.
By the time you're heading home for the night, you and Spencer hadn't spoken again. You'd been so buried in work that you'd skipped lunch to get things done. You'd gotten a comment from Hotch about that, wondering if you were feeling alright. You knew that he knew the truth, even as you told him a fib. Hotch though, was discrete enough not to make you feel scrutinized by exposing just how obvious you were. You couldn't get Emily's words out of your head.
You didn't feel angry with her, and your embarrassment had managed to go away within the first forty minutes after she'd left you alone. You knew she was right, but it still didn't make things easier. It was almost like you forgot how to speak whenever the time came to really express yourself. You supposed that was why your apology had been so flat. Feelings weren't your strong suit, and you'd learned to express them by lashing out. A less than healthy way to live.
You liked that the team didn't speak to you like a child or treat you like you were incapable. Instead, they talked to you like an adult, gave the truth to you in a way that sliced through all your stubbornness and attitude. As you head towards the elevator, you hear footsteps, and look just in time to see Spencer making his way towards you. His satchel hangs off his shoulder, and he looks relieved, an emotion that you knew all too well by the end of a work shift.
You hoped there wouldn't be any cases that drug you back to the unit, all you wanted was a shower and a nap in your own bed.
Stepping into the elevator, Spencer trails you. He takes one side of the elevator, while you huddle up in the other. He offers you a tired smile as the doors slide closed, you offer him a smile right back. It's weary, mostly because you were drained, but partly, because Spencer had been the object of your thoughts the entire day. Especially after Emily's blunt speech. You were drained. The anxiety of keeping the secret far outweighed any fear of rejection now.
"Hey, are you alright?" he addresses you, after noticing the way you seemed lost in your head.
"Hmm?" you hum, and he repeats himself. It snaps you out of your mind spiral, and your head nods. A lie. "I'm all good, Spence." you reply, and he looks disappointed, but not surprised. "Thanks for asking though." you add a second after, and he offers you a dry little nod of his head. The elevator is back silent, and you hope the doors open quick. You might drown if the tension grew any thicker.
"I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable." he says, and you blank. Your confusion is clear as day on your face. "Earlier..." and your still not understanding. "I wasn't telling you that you were important to me, because I was expecting anything in return." he explains, and it clicks. "If it made you feel weird, I'm sorry. It just felt like the right way to express my point then." he proceeds, and you don't know how to collect yourself. "So, I'm sorry." and you want to scream.
Mostly at yourself for being so infuriatingly inadequate at expressing your thoughts and feelings.
"If you want, we could just pretend I never said anything?" he offers, and you don't answer quick enough. The elevator slides open just as the words are settling inside your head, and he's stepping out into the parking deck without another word. You sit there in the elevator for a moment, the door sliding shut after a moment, but you don't move. You feel like you're at a crossroads, almost at a point of no return. If you let Spencer leave now... like this, there would be no coming back.
There would be no room to gain some balls later, and try again. It wouldn't be fair to him. It wouldn't be fair to yourself.
You feel like hyperventilating, thoughts everywhere. Love had never been a subject you really understood. You'd always sort of saw it as this concrete construct. Unchangeable, always either black or white. A gloomy, gray, existence that could cut you up and spit you out. Love could turn you into a hollow version of who you once were. Love could break you down, and make you nothing. But then you think of your team. JJ and Penelope, Hotch, Dave, Emily, Derek. Spencer.
They were the rarest and purest examples of love in your day-to-day life, weren't they? You'd never quite met anyone who had your back more than your team. They fought for you, they fought with you. They believed in you, pushed you to be the best you that you could be. So why was it so hard, what were you scared of? Was it the notion of getting Spencer, and staining him? Blowing out that light inside him the way you'd witnessed for so long?
Was that a life worth living? Was it a chance you could take?
And then you huff, because damnit... you were tired of waiting. You were tired of anxiety, and uncertainty, and insecurity, and pain. You're certain that is why you hit the button to open the elevator. Gracefulness is not on your side as you practically sprint out into the car park, your eyes scanning hopefully for the familiar silhouette of your friend. When you spot him, you release a quiet noise of relief. "S-Spencer!" you hear the echo from your shout, and cringe.
But it doesn't matter, because he turns, he stops, and he's looking at you. His eyebrows are raised, hands gripping his bag, as you start to run. You ignore your fatigue, and your desire to run and hide, and instead run towards something for once. You don't stop running until you're past the point of 'personal space', you want to hover, you want to be in his space, because it was the only way you could possibly get through this. He looks a bit unsure, and still a bit grumpy.
You hope by the end of this that's no longer the case.
"Spencer, I don't want to forget about what you said." you're trying to catch your breath, bouncing up on your heels. "I don't want to pretend you never said it." you add, and Spencer's surprised expression has the hairs on your arm and neck ready to stand on end. "I-I actually want to know what you meant." you admit. "Because, I know what I meant when I said it... and it's not something that I take back." you express, and you can hear blood rushing in your ears.
"What did you mean?" Spencer asks, and you blanche.
"I asked you first." the obvious retort, and Spencer exhales loudly, but there's no annoyance, no exasperation. Only amusement, like always.
"I've done enough talking, haven't I?" he asks. "I want to know what you're thinking." and his voice is so soft, full of tenderness that you feel like you're being serenaded. You feel like you've got a knot in your throat also, almost like you'll suffocate if you don't get your thoughts out. "I promise I won't leave you hanging." and you're not sure what he means by that, but it helps. It makes your heart stutter-step, and you need to catch your breath, because you can't believe this is actually happening, or that you're actually here.
"I-" you play withy your fingers, and you have to inhale deeply to ensure you don't chicken out. "Spence, I didn't tell you that you were important to me, because you said it first." you promise, and he nods, but he doesn't say anything. His eyes are syrupy, alluring, and beautiful, still twinkling under the dingy, flickering lights of the parking deck. "I said it because you're all I really think about." you admit, and his eyebrows furrow, and you're scared.
"And the last three weeks... I've been so mad at you." you blurt out. "I was the one that acted like a child, but I was angry with you, because I thought that you were making fun of me... and all the feelings I have for you." you exhale, and you look down at the ground, because the nerves that come with your words are overwhelming. "I was jealous, I acted like a child, but it was only because I thought you were rubbing it in my face... I thought you were being cruel."
Spencer's long lashes blink rapidly, but he's still stone silent. Probably because he knows that you're still not done. "And that wasn't fair of me, because I know you, Spence. You're not that type of person, but I just I couldn't reign myself in, and I acted immaturely because I was scared... and then just now, in the elevator... I almost did it again. I almost let you think that I don't care about you... but I do. Spencer, I have feelings for you." and you clear your throat, legs shaking.
"I'm in love with you, and I'm not... this isn't some trick or ploy or cry for help. I understand if you're mind is elsewhere... and I'm so sorry if the way I've been acting ruined everything, but I-I love you okay? That's what this has all been about. I'm sorry it took me so long to say something, but there it is." and you gasp, chest heaving now that you were finished. You finally look up at Spencer again, and he's staring you down. It doesn't feel hypersexual or heady with tension.
Instead, it's like the first intake of air into your lungs after being under water for so long. You supposed that's what the truth did, you supposed that's what your feelings for Spencer did when you allowed them to exist. "You mean that?" he asks, and you huff.
"Of course, I mean it. I mean it so much, I think I'm going to be sick." and despite himself he laughs, a bright beam following after it. He takes a small step towards you, and you feel crowded, the body heat from you both warming you up from the inside out. Still, despite how outwardly calm he looked in comparison to you, you managed to spot the shyness, the anxiety that rested in his own eyes. He looked unsure, almost like he was being careful not to ruin the moment.
"Do you know how long I've been wanting to hear you say that?" he asks, and you're shocked, stuck, surprised. You don't know if this is in your mind or if you just got lucky. "Have you ever-" he's got this gleeful look on his face. "There's this quote by Lao Tzu..." he stammers, "Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart, and the senses." he quotes, and there are no butterflies... you think that might be a good thing.
"I don't know if there's been a time since I met you that you haven't been on my mind." Spencer explains, and there it is. "I think that's why I snapped the way I did, I don't think I ever imagined a scenario where we'd be here." he admits, and it pains you to know that he thought that way. "It was-" he motions between you both. "The thought of us being something was sort of just something I believed would always sort of just be a thought." Spencer's glowing red.
The blush coats his ears, cheeks, nose, and neck. His eyes are brighter, and his hands twitch at his side, almost like he's restraining himself. You think you only notice, because you're doing the same.
"I want to be with you." he says this so faintly you're almost unsure you heard him correctly. Your eyes widen, and your surprise is obvious. He takes a small step forward, and he's crowding you. It's nothing like the movies, in fact, the closer he gets to you, the more you're able to see the shyness in his eyes. He reaches out, and his hand ghosts over your side.
"Spence-" and the you that you were just an hour earlier, the one too scared to tell him the truth almost feels like she never even existed.
"Can I?" he asks, and your eyes drift to his hands that are inching closer to your body. You nod your head quickly, and he doesn't look amused. "I want to hear you." he says quietly. "I want you to tell me that I can." he adds, and you find yourself nodding anyway.
"Y-You can." you promise. "But I don't want you to pretend." his eyebrows furrow again. "Please don't do this if you don't mean it." you say, and Spencer's hands drop to your side, there's no wandering fingers, in fact it feels like he wanted to touch you for the sole purpose of keeping you from shaking any longer.
"Y/N, I want to be with you." he repeats it more firmly this time, and he's looking directly at you. It's intense, the eye contact more than anything else. He sounds sincere, and that makes you nervous.
"But what about..." and you trail off, because you don't know what to label the pretty woman he'd been entertaining. Spencer chuckles quietly, and his head shakes from side to side.
"She was nice." he reiterates the words he'd said three weeks prior. "But, she's not you... I don't think anyone would've been able to fill your shoes." he says, and you squeeze your eyes closed, because God, Spencer was so good with words. His hands are on your face, brushing at your cheeks as you shed a few long overdue tears. "Are these happy tears?" he asks hopefully, and your eyes shoot open. Your head nods, and you're not sure why you're so quiet.
Maybe, because life had thrown a curveball and surprised you in a good way. "Happy tears." you agree, and he presses his lips together, thumbs still working to keep the tears at bay. "I just can't believe-"
"Please do." he cuts you off, before you can get it out. "Believe this, believe me." he almost begs, and you hum. "Can I kiss you?" he asks, and you don't answer him, instead you surge forward and press your lips to his. You're certain security is getting a full view of the action, Spencer kisses like he wants to inhale you, and it's nice.. It's more than nice, his kisses are surged with emotion, every ounce of affection that his words had been drenched in was felt in the kiss.
Had breathing not been a factor, you might have stayed there. When you pull back to inhale, Spencer's got this twinkle in his eye that makes your nose scrunch up. "What?" you press, and he grins at you.
"You love me..." he breathes it out, and you're not sure if he's stating it or asking, but you suppose now that the cat's out of the bag, saying it again is nothing.
"Yeah. I love you, Spence." you promise, and he's quick to lean in and peck you on the lips. "D'you love me too?" you ask, once he's pulled back, and his hands move up, cupping both sides of your face as he drags his thumbs up and down.
"I love you." and it sounds like a promise.
So you believe him.
"It’s a profoundly strange feeling, to stumble across someone whose desires are shaped so closely to your own, like reaching toward your reflection in a mirror and finding warm flesh under your fingertips. If you should ever be lucky enough to find that magical, fearful symmetry, I hope you’re brave enough to grab it with both hands and not let go.” ― Alix E. Harrow
#criminal minds#spencer reid#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid smut#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fanfiction#dr spencer reid#spencer reid x fanfiction#spencer reid x reader smut#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader smut
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I always see dbf!Abby but never dbf?reader🏃🏽♀️➡️🏃🏽♀️➡️maybe? Idk
༉‧₊˚. — this is so genius??? thank you anon ily
it all starts when you notice a middle-aged man with dirty blonde hair outside of the house across the street from yours, a look of disappointment on his face. he has many potted plants, maybe too many, and over half of them are dying. you stroll over to his front yard and he wastes no time in expressing his frustration to you, a total stranger who had just moved here with your family a few weeks ago.
“i just don’t get it. i water them every single day. it’s not like they aren’t getting enough sunlight, right?”
you hum in acknowledgment, and he steps aside to allow you to take a look for yourself. it’s almost comical how quickly you notice the cause of his problem.
“it has nothing to do with the amount of sunlight or water they’re getting, actually. look at the soil of the ones that are dying.” you kneel down to feel the soil of one droopy plant in particular– a bunch of faded red petunias– and gather some soil between your fingers. “dry as a desert.”
you spend the rest of your day helping jerry replace the soil in the effected pots over some pleasant small talk, in which he confides in you that ever since his wife passed away, he’s been struggling to upkeep her impressive garden. the hard work is done by the time the sun sets, and he invites you in to wash your hands and have a glass of water.
that’s the very first time you get to meet abby.
she’s about your age, standing at nearly six feet tall. even in her sweatpants and baggy t-shirt, you can tell that she’s made of pure muscle. initially, when she walks down the stairs and sees a random girl in her kitchen, having a conversation with her father about invasive plant species in seattle, she’s puzzled, but she recognizes you fairly quickly.
she remembers watching from her bedroom window while you helped your mom to drag a couch in through the front door. she remembers going outside to check the mailbox and seeing you, sitting on your porch, feet propped up on the short wooden fence with a book in your hands. she could never seem to take her eyes off of you any chance she got to see you, so, when she sees you standing in her home, she completely freezes. luckily for her, jerry rushes to introduce the two of you.
“i didn’t even know you were home, sweetie! abby, this is y/n. y/n, this is abby, my daughter.”
“hey,” she extends a hand, “i’m abby.”
you smile as you reach for her hand and shake it. “bet you can’t guess what my name is.”
abby’s nose scrunches up as she realizes her mistake, completely aware that she isn’t thinking straight. she can’t be too embarrassed, though. not with the way your eyes scan her from head to toe like a predator sizing up its prey. “cut me some slack, i haven’t had my coffee yet. anyways, why are you both covered in dirt?”
the night ends with jerry scolding abby for making coffee so late, and thanking you for all of your help before sending you home with a homemade chocolate chip muffin.
since then, jerry shows up at your door when he needs help or simply has a question about gardening, and you never hesitate to help him. he’s a respectable man who just wants to honor his wife’s memory, to keep something of hers alive even if it isn’t her.
within a few months, his garden is looking lively and vibrant and noticeably healthy. after a few more months, he’s able to do everything you’ve taught him on his own, but you still come visit a few times a week to see how it’s going.
each and every time, abby finds some excuse to talk to you. you aren’t blind to it, but you certainly aren’t opposed to it. she’ll compliment your hair, your outfit, thank you for helping her dad with something so important to him, and anything else she can say to get you to stick around longer.
it isn’t much longer until jerry invites you to a barbecue in his backyard. an hour into it, he’s standing with a few of his friends around the grill, some neighborhood kids are playing with water guns in the yard, and you can’t help but notice his daughter’s absence.
you excuse yourself to the restroom in the middle of a gossip session with a few older ladies from around the block. however, the first thing you do when you step inside is beeline up the stairs and toward abby’s room.
of course, you knock first, and hear a muffled “come in” from the other side of the door. you enter, and see abby sitting on her bed with her laptop open, clearly drowning in her college work. her messy blonde hair is in a low bun, and her body is engulfed by a sweatshirt that is at least two sizes too big for her. she glances up, notices it’s you, and immediately straightens her slouched posture. “oh. y/n, uh… hey. you look nice. like, really nice.”
“nice enough to make you come join the party?”
“not that nice. i’m dying over here.” she vaguely gestures to her laptop.
“you’re pretty for a dead girl.” you hum, walking over to sit next to her and take a look at the laptop. there’s a concoction of mathematical problems plastered on the screen from top to bottom. your eyes hurt just looking at it. “oh, abby, you poor thing. all i can do is pray for you.”
“why do i need to know what a logarithm function is? and since when is there limits to infinity? i thought the whole point of infinity is that it’s limitless.”
you decide to cut her off before she can get any more worked up than she already is. “what’s your major?”
“pathology. which, mind you, has nothing to do with logarithm functions.”
you huff out a laugh. “pathology… what’s that? something medical, right?”
“yeah, pretty much just the study of diseases.”
“that’s hot.“
abby stares at you blankly, and you stare right back. clearly, you have her full attention now. “why do you always do shit like that?”
“like what?”
“like, you know… ‘that’s hot,’ shit like that.” she says, trying her luck at a very bad impression of you. “calling me pretty. staring at me.”
“because i think you’re pretty, and i like staring at you.” you answer simply. “why? want me to stop?”
“i didn’t say that.”
you smile, eyes studying her flustered face, the pout on her parted lips and the reddening blush across her cheeks.
just as she thinks you’re finally going to make a move, you stand up from your spot on her bed and begin heading toward the door. “well, it’s always nice talking to you, abby, but i gotta get back to the party before linda thinks i abandoned her.”
“what– who’s linda?” she tilts her head.
“the lady from down the street. you know, the one with the blue eyeshadow and smoker’s cough.”
abby scoffs at the description. “oh, right. linda. do you really have to go?”
you lean against the doorframe and cross your arms. “i don’t know. what would happen if i stayed?”
this questions seems to leave abby at a loss for words. is there even a right answer? she could be reading too far into this, and end up looking like a creep if she spoke her mind– but then again, she could be missing out on a golden opportunity if she doesn’t. she’s wanted you for as long as she’s known you, that’s completely true, but saying it out loud is something different.
after a long few moments of silence, you stand upright once more and reach for her doorknob. “thought so.”
with that, you shut her door and join the party downstairs once more, leaving abby alone with a million thoughts and feelings. she can’t focus on her work. she can’t focus on anything other than the way you smelled, sitting so close to her. how soft your skin looked, how she gets goosebumps just thinking about your voice.
once the party has died down and she’s done helping her dad clean up, she rushes back up to her room (and puts away all of the schoolwork she never got to), so that she can send you a simple message from her phone.
can you come over?
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Missing Journal
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Hispanic/Latina! Reader
Summary: Charles reads Y/N’s journal and finds out she has a crush on an F1 driver.
Warning: the usual spellings and grammatical errors, inaccuracies of pretty much anything involving F1
A/N: kinda based off season 1 episode 3 of Austin and Ally. However, instead of reading the journal about Y/N’s crush and thinking it’s about him when it’s actually someone else, Charles would read it and think it’s about someone else when in reality it’s about him. Does that’s make sense? Cool. Also, i always put Hispanic/Latina because I don't know what you prefer to be called and because this does exclude Spain, Haiti, Brazil, and other Latin American countries that don't speak Spanish.
Y/N and Charles have been friends for a long time, but so have Y/N and Lando. Y/N moved from the states to Monaco and became neighbors with Charles, ultimately becoming friends, but she also participated in Junior Karting with Lando, befriending Lando and Max Fewtrell.
It is safe to say Y/N has been friends with the three of them for a very long time and she is so grateful because she always felt like she didn't belong since she isn't European like them. But she has Logan as well, even if they aren't super close. She splits time between Charles and Lando. If Lando thinks McLaren is going to do soemthing interesting, he invites Y/N to Woking. Something interesting happening at Ferrari? Charles is bringing Y/N to Maranello. Y/N loves travelling (the Sagittarius in me) so it works out perfectly.
One day, Y/N's apartment was flooded because of poor plumbing and Charles offered her a place to stay. When her apartment was clear, both of them decided it was better if they were roommates since she was the better cook and that brings us to today.
Y/N was sleeping in her room peacefully when she felt someone shake her awake and she saw Charles standing over her.
"If you are going to kill me, can i at least eat first?" Y/N asked sleepily.
"Y/N, wake up, they changed our flight to Imola." Charles said and Y/N sat up in her bed.
"What do you mean they changed our flight? Don't we fly priavte?" Y/N asked.
"Yes, but Fred wants us to be in Imola earlier so we have more time to go over strategies so get dressed, sweetie, we need to go to the runway." Charles said. Y/N's heart fluttered at Charles's nickname for her. She tries to think nothing of it because he is a Libra after all, he is very affectionate towards her and Carlos as well. She got out of bed.
"Okay fine, but get out." Y/N said, pushing Charles out of her room to get dressed. She packed a dufflebag with 5/6 outfits, pajamas, anything she really needed for a 5 or 6 day trip more or less.
"Whatever you say, love, I'll buy us something to eat on the way there." Charles said outside her door. The last thing Y/N packed was her journal, she likes writing down everything about her travels since she writes travel articles for Hello Monaco (don't know if there is a traveling section, lets pretend). But she also writes about her love life or lackthereof. Y/N washed her face and got dressed in her comfortable clothes. When she left her room, she sw Charles on the couch with his small luggage.
"Alright, lets go. Are we stopping by the bakery?" Y/N asked.
"Of course. I'll wait outside while you order the pastries, I'll give you money." Charles said.
"Thanks, lets go." They left the apartment and got into Charles's car. Charles parked outside the bakery and Y/N got out of the car, ordered pastries, getting herself a warm cookie croissant (THEY ARE SO GOOD, my mom needs to buy more from the market) and whatever Charles gets. She gets back in the car and Charles starts driving away.
"Can you feed me, honey?" Charles asked. Y/N broke off a piece of the pain au chocolat and fed it to Charles, his tongue and lips touching her two fingers holding the piece of pastry. She felt butterflies in her stomach and decided to just hold the oain au chocolat and have him bite it but... "No, no, i can't drive like that, just feed me like you did before." Charles said and thats exactly what Y/N did.
Now of course Charles knew it wasn't necessary for Y/N to feed him like that, but he loves the intimacy of this gesture. So having her feed him like they were boyfriend and girlfriend even though they are not was great thing in Charles's book. Especially considering his feelings for the Hispanic/Latina queen by his side. Y/N finished feeding Charles the pastry and licked her fingers that were covered in chocolate because no one wastes chocolate here. They were playing music in his car, just vibing, singing along, Y/N finished her cookie croissant, and they were just talking until they made it to the airport runway where their private jet was, with Carlos waiting by the jet.
"Por fin! Por qué se demoraron tanto?" Carlos asked.
"Güey, relájate, teníamos hambre, queríamos comer en el camino." Y/N said, getting her dufflebug out of Charles's car, Charles gets his suitcase out too.
"I don't like it when you call me güey." Carlos said.
"I picked up Mexican slang from Pato that time he was in Woking with Lando. I miss Pato, i gotta text him." Y/N said, entering the jet with Charles and Carlos trailing behind. She sits down. "I'll never get used to this, I grew up lower middle class."
"Well your friends are F1 drivers and we invite you everywhere." Charles said.
"And I thank you for that, honestly. My boss loves my hotel reviews, thanks for paying for my room by the way." Y/N said.
"Of course, it's no big deal." Charles said.
"What i don't get is why we have to fly if the drive is just 5 and a half hours." Y/N said.
"But by plane it is an hour." Carlos said. "That mean we have more time to relax, work on strategies, go clubbing." Carlos says.
"We are not clubbing before media day." Charles warned him.
"Fine, que pesado." Carlos said and Y/N giggled.
The flight itself was bearable, Y/N fell asleep and Charles was watching her with a smile on his face.
"You should tell her you like her, mate. Because this" Carlos says gesturing to what Charles was doing. "Its getting creepy and concerning."
"When the moment is right i will tell her." Charles said.
"Okay then." Carlos said, putting his headphones.
When the jet landed, a chauffer took them from the airport to their hotel. When they arrived at the hotel lobby, Y/N saw Lando and Oscar on the couch, Lando was on his phone while Oscar talked to Logan.
"Lando!" Y/N shouted, running to where Lando was.
"Y/N!" Lando exclaimed, standing up from the couch to hug his best girl friend. "How was your flight? Are you hungry?"
"Nah, I'm fine, I had a cookie croissant before the flight so i should be good." Y/N said.
"Nonsense, you should have a proper breakfast. Osc, you wanna go out for breakfast?" Lando asked the Australian.
"Yeah sure." Oscar said. "Lets get our keys and we'll head out." As soon as everyone got their keys, they went to their rooms which are all on the same floor, WAGS obviously roomed with their partners, Y/N had her own room and she place her dufflebag there. She knocked on Lando's door and he opened up.
"Should i change." Y/N asked.
"Nah, you're fine. You ready to go Osc?" Lando asked Oscar, who was talking to Logan
"Yeah, lets go, catch you later, Logan." Oscar said goodbye.
"I'll talk to you later my fellow American!" Y/N exclaimed as she left with Lando and Oscar. Charles was observing their interaction.
"Jealous?" Carlos asked right behind Charles startling him.
"You scared me, mate. But i am not jealous." Charles said.
"You might want to unclench your fist then." Carlos tapped on Charles's fist and he releases.
On their free day, Y/N was writing down the name of the restaurant/cafe they went to, reviewed the food, the atmosphere, how much the food was.
"Y/N, do you have to review everything?" Lando asked.
"Yes, how was your food?" Y/N asked.
"It was good." Lando said.
"Do you think it is worth the price?" Y/N asked.
"I say yes but I think if you were wokring class, definitely not." Lando said.
"Thank you. What about you, Osc?" Y/N asked.
"I mean I've had better in Monza, but its still good." Oscar replied and Y/N wrote it down.
"You gentlemen have been great help." Y/N said.
"Will you be in the Ferrari hospitality this time or will you be coming over to McLaren?" Lando asked.
"I can't say yet. I'll probably arrive at the paddock with Charles, hang around his hospitality halfway during the break inbetween free practices and then go over to you before the second free parctice starts." Y/N said.
"Yeah, that sounds like a plan. You coming to media day or are you going to be sightseeing?" Oscar asked.
"The hospitality gives me free food so I'm going to media day because i don't like sightseeing by myself." Y/N said.
"You just want me to pay." Lando said.
"You have the money to pay for me! I don't see the problem." Y/N said.
"She’s been like this since I joined F1.” Lando told Oscar.
“I do the same with Charles, don’t start.” Y/N said.
(This scene was written before I found out what happened in Imola)
It was media day and Y/N was repping McLaren at the paddock, it made Charles feel a certain way.
“Stopping staring.” Carlos said.
“I can’t help it, they’re acting like a couple and I don’t like it.” Charles said.
“At least she’s not wearing his number.” Carlos tried to cheer him up, Charles was going to answer him when Y/N came up to him.
“Have you guys seen my journal?” Y/N asked.
“How does it look like?” Charles asked.
“It’s a mini blue notebook with my name in rhinestones, my friend decorated it for me.” Y/N said,
“We haven’t seen it, love.” Charles said.
“Fuck, what am I going to do?” Y/N asked worriedly.
“Relax, it’s just a book.” Carlos said.
“It is NOT just a book, it is my diary and work journal all rolled into one, i write ALL my personal stuff in there, if anyone else reads it, I WILL DIE.” Y/N said.
“Maybe you should start taking notes on your phone.” Carlos said.
“Like I’m going to listen to a colonizer.” Y/N snapped. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it. I mean you do come from colonizers but i should call you that, it’s not your fault.”
“Ya relájate. We’ll look for it.” Carlos said.
“Thank you! I was basically in every hospitality today so I gotta ask around.” Y/N mentioned.
“Why were you in every hospitality?” Charles asked.
“Well i run an F1 TikTok account too so I was just hospitalities. I hope no one has read it.” Y/N said before running off.
“Do you think she’s overreacting?” Carlos asked.
“Her mom said she was born a drama Queen.” Charles said shrugging. “I’m gonna go talk with Max.” Charles said, leaving Carlos, Charles entered the Red Bull hospitality.
“Hey Charles, where’s Y/N? I found her notebook.” Max said,
“That’s great! Where did you find it?” Charles asked.
“She left it on the couch when she was talking to Checo. Do you know why she was going mental about this?” Max asked, giving the notebook to Charles.
“Apparently there’s a lot of personal stuff written in here.” Charles said and that’s when he got an idea.
“No.” Max said immediately.
“You don’t even know what I was going to say.” Charles said.
“You are not reading it.” Max said.
“Why not?” Charles asked.
“Because Y/N would probably murder you.” Max said.
“What Y/N doesn’t know, won’t kill me.” Charles said opening Y/N's journal.
"You act as if you were married. Well, what does it say?" Max asked, looking over Charles's shoulder to read what it says.
"Apparently Y/N has a crush on someone on the grid." Charles says. He kept reading. "And that guy is not me, looks like she has a crush on Lando." Charles sighed, closing the book.
"I haven't finished reading it." Max says, taking Y/N's journal to keep reading. "Okay, she could be talking about anyone, it doesn't necessarily mean she likes Lando." Max said, reading over the journal entry.
"Really? 'We've known each other since we were kids', Lando and Y/N have done karting together. 'I could easily get lost in his eyes, his accent is adorable, we spend so much time together and the gestures he does with me are so intimate, it's almost as if we are already togther but we are not', who else could it be, Max?" Charles asked.
"Okay well everyone on the grid has an accent to Y/N except of Logan. I have seen Lando lead Y/N places with his hand on her lower back. Maybe you are right, Y/N has a crush on Lando." Max said.
"Oh well, I lost my chance, let me just give Y/N her journal, I'll see tomorrow before free practice." Charles said.
"I thought we were going to play videoames later tonight." Max said.
"Not anymore mate, I have to talk to Pierre and pout about losing the love of my life to a child." Charles said.
"He's only 2 years younger than you." Max said.
"He is a child!" Charles shouted before leaving the Red Bull hospitality with Y/N's journal in hand. We was walking around the paddock when he spotted Y/N on the phone.
"Si mami, estoy comiendo bien, te lo juro. Mami, luego te marco, mi amigo Charles quiere hablar conmigo, te quiero mucho, bye." Y/N hung up the phone and put it in her bag. "What's up?"
"Oh I found your journal." Charles handed Y/N the journal and she took it happily.
"Thank you so much, you're the best, where did you find it?" Y/N asked.
"Oh in Red Bull, Max found it on the couch." Charles said.
"I'll thank him when i see him. Are you doing anything tonight? I wanted to visit the Aryton Senna statue and since I know you're a fan.." Y/N was cut off by Charles
"Sorry, I'll be with Pierre since Kika couldn't come." Charles said
"Oh, well maybe after free practice tomorrow?" Y/N asked hopefully.
"I don't think so, I'll talk to you tomorrow, Y/N." Charles said leaving Y/N in the paddock and she walked to the McLaren hospitality where Lando and Oscar were playing Uno with some of the mechanics.
"Hey, Y/N, when we finish this round, we'll leave." Lando said.
"Yeah, thats fine." Y/N said and she sat on the couch. Once the game was over, Lando drove her back to the hotel.
"Did you find your journal?" Lando asked.
"I did, Charles and Max found it." Y/N said.
"Then how come you don't sound thrilled that you have your journal back?" Lando asked.
"Because Charles was acting weird, like he said he didn't want to see the Aryton Senna statue." Y/N said.
"But Leclerc is a big fan of him." Lando commented.
"Thats what i said!" Y/N exclaimed.
"Leave him, maybe tomorrow will be better." Lando commented.
Unfortunately, that was not the case, her Friday and Saturday were spent in the McLaren hospitality, she was now watching qualifying on the TV (Q3) and she saw something awful happen, Lando and Charles were fighting for P3, their wheels were touching and everything and it got so bad that now Charles’s front wing and Lando’s rear wing were damaged when Q3 finished. Y/N ran to Lando’s garage to see what happened.
“Bro, what the hell were you two doing?” Y/N asked.
“You should be asking that to Leclerc, I don’t know what is wrong with him, he’s been on my tail for all of quali.” Lando said.
“Don’t worry, I will.” Y/N said storming the Ferrari hospitality and she spotted Carlos. “Cabrón, where’s the other cabrón?”
“He’s in the driver room.” Carlos answered and Y/N bursted into the driver room, Charles was shirtless.
“What the hell, Y/N?!?” Charles asked, putting his shirt back on and Y/N locks the door.
“We need to talk.” Y/N said.
“There is nothing to talk about.” Charles said.
“The hell there is! You’ve been acting weird since Thursday, you haven’t invited me to the Ferrari hospitality, you didn’t want to come with me to see the Aryton Senna statue, it’s like you changed when…” that’s when Y/N realizes what must have happened. “You read my journal!” Y/N yelled, she picked up a pillow and started hitting him. “How fucking dare you!”
“How dare I? How dare you?” Charles asked, blocking her hits.
“Excuse me?” Y/N asked, halting her action,
“You heard me! I Can’t believe you like Lando. Lando? He is so immature!” Charles shouted.
“What the hell are you talking about?” Y/N asked.
“Your journal entry! ‘we spend so much time together and the gestures he does with me are so intimate, it's almost as if we are already togther but we are not’, you spend so much time with Lando, who else could you be writing about?” Charles asked and Y/N just stared at him.
“Mas menso no puedes ser! It’s you, Charles! I like you, you ridiculously oblivious moron!” Y/N exclaimed and now it was Charles’s turn to stare.
“You like me?” Charles asked shyly.
“I love you! We were neighbors, we are roommates, we spend so much time together that I developed feelings for you. Now please say something.” Y/N said,
“I like you too. When I thought you liked Lando i went crazy.” Charles admitted.
“That’s why you were acting like that in quali! Lando was kinda mad,” Y/N said,
“Yeah, sorry about that. But now that I know you like me…you coming to the Ferrari hospitality?” Charles asked.
“Of course I will.” Y/N said.
It was the Grand Prix and Y/N was in the garage with the red headphones one watching from the monitors.
It was a tough race but Charles made P1 and Y/N couldn’t be any prouder. When Charles “parked” the car at his spot, he saw Y/N standing with Free and the rest of the team so he got out from the car and kissed Y/N. They pulled away and smiled.
“Sorry, I got caught up in the moment.” Charles said, laughing.
“Does this mean we’re dating.” Y/N asked all giggly after her first kiss with Charles.
“Of course we’re dating, Mon ange. You are my girl, and now we are paddock official.” Charles said.
“So when are you taking me out on our first date?” Y/N asked.
“As soon as I’m done with the post race interview.” Charles said, kissing her one last time.
The End
It took forever to write but I hope y’all like it, thanks for your patience!
#hispanic reader#latina#hispanic#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic
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its finals season (again..) and huge projects for classes right now. can we get a stressed reader x modern mizu where reader is like actually tweaking out? like I mean pulling our energy shots, shivering hands, 'gotta lock in', hysterically crying on snapchat video and sending it to their groupchat for moral support type of tweaking out and the reader is going BANANAS over all the final papers, and studying for finals and mizu helps comfort reader?? i hope this would be a silly little write but also helpful to anyone going through finals season right now. much love! xoxo <3
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Hey dears!
To start this, I am absolutely sorry for being gone for so long. I had my thesis defense, practicals, laboratory works, deadlines, and my finals all in the span of two weeks AND I fainted twice, got sick twice, and nose bled a LOT.
I was chugging 3 cans of energy drinks a day, eating one meal per day, sleeping minutes less than how long I showered, and smoked quite a lot. Someone even caught me sleeping on the fire exit stairs (istg so embarrassing ;;). Honestly makes me wonder how I'm not six feet under by now.
To those who are going through their finals, please don't follow my lead. Vomiting at 3am from how dizzy you are while some Sepultura song plays in the background is NOT the experience you'd think it was. Try to plan when you'll tackle your work and get some sleep as much as you can, on your free time, on your commute. I swear, answering tests are SOO much easier when your vision isn't spinning or tunneling.
Chose to do this request first to remind you all to take care amidst your finals (or as a reward if your finals are finished, good job dear!).
Hope you enjoy! Mwa mwa <3
warning: not proofread, my corny jokes, she/her for mizu, implied afab reader
Blue orbs watched as you cracked open another can of Red Bull. A small grunt leaving your throat as the fizzy caffeinated drink went down your esophagus. Was this your second? third..no wait..fourth?
Damn.
How are your blood vessels surviving this onslaught of caffeine you've been shoving down your system? She had no clue. But what she did know was that you've had enough. This wasn't healthy at all. Your lips were already as pale as the palms of your hands which were trembling to the point where you couldn't stop writing because that meant you'd feel the quivering of your hands even more.
The two of you had decided to slave off at Mizu's apartment for your finals. It was mostly Mizu dragging you there since your friends have been bombarding her to take care of you since she had the closest to what was considered a free schedule. T'was something about you freaking out and crying over the finals. She didn't have a Snapchat account so she didn't know.
Usually, she wasn't even interested in these stuff, but when Akemi showed her a picture of you with a thumbs up, holding a can of Monster, dark circles under your bloodshot eyes, tear streaks on your face, with the caption 'Boutta pull another Kay Chung tonight', concerned didn't even begin to describe what she felt.
Boutta pull a Kay Chung?
What or who was this Kay Chung anyway?
She knew you were a hard worker, probably one of the most studious people she knew, so she already expected you to be busy studying. What she didn't expect was the mess you were in.
The moment she stepped into your unit, cans of energy drinks, bottles of energy shots, cups of coffee, and random paper strewn randomly littered your apartment. The only source of light was your window and a small dim lamp you had.
Was that cup noodle container growing mold?
Ew.
It was like the Capital Wasteland in here, and she was the lonesome wanderer, awaiting the dangers to come.
And you were a radiated ghoul hunched over your desk with the emptiest gaze she has ever seen. Your head in your hands, as you scrunched your eyebrows together, trying to figure out what the fuck was wrong with your equation.
Now she understood the bombardment of messages from Akemi and the others, and damn was she grateful for the heads up because you looked like you were at death's door and death... Death just thought you looked too pitiful to let in.
The two of you were now sitting on Mizu's carpet, books, papers, and gadgets on the smooth wood of the coffee table. In her mind, she thought a bit of companionship would comfort you like it usually did. But she was wrong.
The shaking grip you had on your pen and the occasional 'what the actual fuck?' or 'the hell?' already told her that you were too locked in to relax even just a bit. You looked like you were losing it.
Her eyes peered over your review sheet before she raised an eyebrow at how scattered your handwriting looked, numbers and symbols italicized to the left and to the right as if they were dancing and your solutions scattered. Add this value here..derive the formula there..problem 3's solution is somehow on the back of the paper even though problem 5 was solved on problem 1's spot. It looked like a shit show.
"What...problem is this for? You did it wrong." Her tongue clicking as a slender finger encircled a formula you derived wrong, making you look at her with a mildly bothered look. Your eyes tiredly scanned your review sheet, looking away to the side to blink the heaviness of your lids away, then looking back at it before letting out a strangled sounding groan, shoulders slumping back onto the sofa as you covered your eyes with your hands before looking at your own solutions again. "I don't fucking know..maybe it's for..umm..for..fuuuuuck," you sighed defeatedly, realizing that you couldn't understand your own handwriting either.
You wanted to strangle yourself so bad right now or like, strangle your professor until they give you a passing grade. Maybe the threat of arson would scare the university admins into passing everyone for the semester???? The prospect of being a sugar baby is starting to sound better than trying to finish this degree.
It wasn't like you were an absolute idiot. You could solve these problems no problemo. However, your vision was already lagging and tunneling. Whenever you tried to read the problem or your own handwriting, it was like your vision was hyper-focusing on one spot and the areas around it were...spinning or it'd focus on everything else EXCEPT the ones you wanted to focus on.
The amount of caffeine you had consumed wasn't even helping anymore. Instead of waking you up, you just felt jittery like a hyper-charged toy. Before you were sleepy and slow, now you were still sleepy but faster.
And when was the last time you even ate anyway? Was that moldy cup noodle your last meal? You didn't even know anymore at this point. You could barely feel anything aside from the fear of your impeding academic doom. Not even hunger was strong enough to stop you.
Mizu's eyebrows furrowed at how miserable you looked before sighing and pulling a sheet of paper out of her own notebook. "Here," she sighed out, sitting beside you and scanning each problem you had printed out before re-writing each question you looked like you struggled with. Her eyes occasionally glanced at you, unseen worry rising with every hitch of your breath and every twitch of your eyebrow as you looked at the questions she rewrote.
"Mizu..I don't want to do those all again," you groaned frustratedly, ruffling your hair own hair aggressively, strands falling to the carpet below. A hand held yours firmly, preventing you from tangling the ends of locks even more. "I'm going to teach you, dumbass. We can't have you failing and dying at the same time," she huffed, grabbing your calculator and placing it in front of both of you. She leaned closer to you, hand on your waist to pull you closer before taking the pencil and pointing to the first problem she rewrote.
"I'm not going to repeat my explanations, so listen well,"
...was what she said.
However, Mizu was a big softie when it came to you. Every time she caught you spacing out or having a hard time in general, she took her time and explained it to you again, even explaining it slower, simpler, or more detailed as needed. She really made sure that you understood the principle of the problems and the process of solving them, handing the pencil and calculator to you to make sure you actually understood her.
After a while, you were slowly starting to understand you earlier mistakes, and with her help, you were able to finally solve the review sheet. Thank god for hot smart women.
A look of amusement crossed her face as she watched you slump back onto the sofa with a loud sigh of relief. Shaking her head with a small lop-sided smile, she took the pen again before grabbing your laptop and searching for similar problems. "Here," she said, turning the device towards you. "Solve these. I'll be back in a bit."
You looked at her in confusion before letting out a tired groan. The exhaustion was starting to let itself be known through the heaviness in your lids. Another problem set was the last thing you wanted to do right now.
Oh wait.
Fuck, you still had to edit your methodologies and results, and you haven't even started on the discussion yet. Oh god...
'Better get started, I guess,' you thought with a defeated sigh. Muttering a string of curses under your breath, you picked up your pencil and calculator and began solving yet another set of hellish questions while the dark-haired woman stood up and walked off somewhere in her apartment. Silence filled the room aside from the aggressive scritching and scratching of lead against paper and the sound of clacking from your calculator.
Every now and then, Mizu would come back with something to comfort you. May it be a cup of water, a bigger pillow, a hair tie, or to charge your phone for you. She didn't really speak though, fully wanting you to focus on your work.
It was like her quiet little way of telling you that she was here and that she cared for you.
Amidst your problem solving, the smell of something being fried hit your nose, making you look up. It was a bit oily, but at the same time, homely and savory. Your stomach growled slightly at the smell, reminding you of that uncomfortable feeling of hunger that you were somehow able to ignore during your study sessions.
Just as you had finished writing your answers, Mizu came out of the kitchen with a bowl of rice and a plate of what seemed to be fried fish. Kinda burnt but maybe that's a charm point...or something. At least she tried.
She set it down on a clear space on the coffee table and gently urged it towards you. "Here," she mumbled, looking at you expectantly. You stared at the food she prepared, snorting a bit at the charred skin, some bits missing which obviously stuck to the pan while she was frying it. "Err..Mizu...?"
"Don't mind how it looks just..just eat, okay?" she groaned, sounding a bit embarrassed, a bit of pink dusting her cheeks. Her eyes looking away as her hand went up to cover half her face. You couldn't help but laugh a bit. Mizu? Embarrassed? God that woke you up, didn't it?
The sound of your laughter made her feel even more embarrassed but at the same time relieved. Your laugh was so fucking cute. She was glad that you were starting to sound a bit more like your usual self. Hell, you were smiling now. A big improvement compared to the face of misery you were making earlier.
Eventually, your laughter subsided upon the realization sinking into you. She really did all this just to take of you. Dragging you to her apartment, tutoring you, fetching things for you, cooking for you...
She really does care. Doesn't she?
Your hands picked up the chopsticks before breaking into the soft flesh of the food in front of you, picking off the bones before taking a bite. It was salty, the char even made it a bit bitter, and for god-knows-why, even a bit spicy?? But it tasted so good to you. Heavenly, dare I say.
As you continued to eat, bite after bite and scoop after scoop, the shakiness in your hands slowly calmed down. You couldn't help but look up at your friend who was now checking your answers, the ghost of satisfaction making itself known through the barely visible smile she had. "Mizu..."
She looked over at you, raising an eyebrow to indicate that she was listening. "Thank you for uh..taking care of me," you said shyly, giving her a small smile. A low chuckle escaped her throat as she shook her head slowly as if in amusement. "At least you're not shaking like a leaf anymore," she joked, followed by you letting out a small 'hmph!', making her chuckle yet again.
Though she wouldn't tell it to you right now, she'd be more than happy to take care of you anytime you wanted or needed it.
The sound of your pen tapping on the paper filled the room again as her eyes narrowed at your answers, checking it carefully. After a while, she handed the paper back to you, looking very much satisfied. "Looks good," she said, eyes watching the proud smile on your face. "How 'bout a reward?...Some rest I suppose?"
Your smile faltered at the sound of rest. "I can't...my manuscript is due in a couple of days and I haven't even finished editing my methodologies and results," you explained, opening the files for each of your chapters. "The data isn't even tabulated in the required format. It looks like shit."
She stood up from her spot and sat next to you, placing a hand on your head to pat it gently as she looked at the screen. Her eyes narrowed again while you scrolled up the file for her before she sighed. "Yeah, it does look like shit," she agreed before suddenly grabbing your laptop and setting in front of her. "Go and take a nap or something. I'll do whatever I can to...whatever this is."
"But Mizu, this isn't even your field. I can't—" She cut you off with a finger to your lips before gesturing towards the sofa behind the both of you. "Nap," she ordered firmly. You sighed before standing up and laying down on the sofa. You knew there was no use arguing. When Mizu makes up her mind, she's deadset on it.
Her eyes scanned your figure for a moment, taking in every curve of your body and the way your face relaxed. Then, she took off her jacket and draped it over you, before giving you a small loving pat. Before you could even open your mouth to protest, she immediately shushed you and turned to your manuscript, scanning over it.
Your eyes observed the way her eyebrows furrowed and the way her eyes darted from word-to-word. The sound of her typing and clicking filling the room, oddly relaxing you.
It didn't take long for you to drift off to sleep. And for the first time since hell week started, you finally relaxed.
No frustration, no stress, just...sleep.
You did nap for hours longer than expected though.
Don't worry.
Your methodologies were now updated, results properly formatted, and ideas in bullet points for your discussion were laid out in a new file. Even your references were fixed.
Damn, you really wanted to smooch Mizu reaaal hard after this.
#bes#bes mizu x reader#blue eye samurai#blue eye samurai x reader#mizu#mizu x reader#bes mizu#bes x reader#blue eye samurai mizu#mizu imagine#mizu x you#mizu blue eye samurai#mizu x fem!reader
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Thank the heavens I found your blog! after getting into the wind breaker anime and currently reading manga. I am starved for wind breaker reader content until I found you. If possible can I request hayato suo relationship/boyfriend headcannons? Oh it would make my day and all the suo lovers days as well
Thank you.
—For some reason, Suo has been hot on my requests on Tumblr へ[ ᴼ ▃ ᴼ ]_/¯ !!
Hayato Suo as your boyfriend (DRABBLE)
In the past, Hayato was able to score very well with many girls that were his age and some even above his age that managed to fall for him. But, he has never dated anyone. However, he doesn’t see himself as inexperienced.
From the get-go, he’s learned how to act right which probably resulted in him getting many girls to like him. Even so, under his nice exterior, he’s an extremely hard person that falls in love. The only reason why you were able to date him out of all of the people he has rejected, was because you’ve known him the longest.
That doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you for who you are—if anything, his infatuated with your personality and the way you look up at him with those damning eyes (although sometimes, he questions some of things you say and wonders if they should be studied or not). Before he knew it, he started to fall for you without even knowing.
It was easy when you first started dating him, he still treats you like how he always has but soon grew more intimate and touchier with you. Before in the past you two were strictly friends. Even though the both of you have been going to each other’s houses for the longest time, neither of you had made a move until the moment you started dating. He didn’t start touching you back then out of respect and not wanting to make things weird, so when the both of you held hands for the first time, you caught a glimpse of his ears going red which was something you’ve never seen before.
He continued speaking to you in the same chaotic manner you’ve always known, while from time to time sneaking in little compliments and caressing the flesh of your skin with the most subtle touches.
In the morning and nights, he used to text you when he’s going to bed and telling you goodnight before sleeping. That changed when you two switched to calling more often. Aside from the beginning of the relationship, you two got close fairly quick—after all, you’ve known each other since forever.
Quickly, he’s not shy when holding your hand and communicating with you about any problems that occur in your relationship. He ends up solving them in a few hours or a day, he doesn’t like dragging the situation on and will force you to speak out even if you struggle with communicating. If you’re the type of person that gives the cold shoulder, he will not let you do so and won’t stop bothering you until you give a proper answer.
Honestly it’s amazing he’s able to put up with your petty behaviour. Nirei had witnessed it first hand when the Suo had gotten a call from you and watched the two of you argue through the phone. He stepped away for a few minutes before returning back to the blonde-haired boy with the same smile that lets him know everything is okay.
Because of how unhinged he is, typically speaking—he’s the first one to make nearly all of the moves. He was the one that stole your first kiss. That day was surreal to you. The way he took you out skating for the first time and held hands on the rink, then going on to bringing you to dinner and finally ending the day off with a sweet, warm kiss that engulfed your mind when he kissed you in the dead of night underneath a streetlight lamp as the snow fell down within every second he kept his lips on yours.
Soon after, many of your dates were usually spending time outside together. He’s not much of an indoor person and likes to walk to different places with you all over town. The only time he will do an indoor date is if the weather is bad or one of you got sick.
Even with how nice Suo can portray himself as, somethings he does have is a little risky side of him that loves to tease you. It’s a secret though, he loves to make a fool out of the people he fights and watch them crumble, so it’s no wonder why he loves it when you’re all shy around him. Moments like this, when he’s needy and just generally carving his girlfriend, he likes to go into your personal space, place you on his lap if you’re watching a show with him, plaster open mouthed kisses on your neck and shoulders all while acting oblivious as to why you’re red.
Whenever he sees something in public that reminds him of you, he buys it immediately and gives it to you the next time he sees you again. The first time he did this it was a keychain of your favourite food then it slowly turned into random stickers, pencils, clothing wear, and jewelry. He likes to spoil you without even knowing himself. You have to remind him that he paid last time when you went out to eat meaning it’s your turn to return the favour. But even so, he tells you to put your cash away and let him pay again.
Once dating you for long enough, he never grows tired of your diabolical personality and is glad you put with his chaotic behaviour.
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Nostalgia - Jack Drury
a/n: this took me so long to finish, but i'm glad to finally be done with it :) i'm very far behind but i will absolutely get all these done!
summary: you meet jack's parents for the first time over dinner
word count: ~2.3k (i got carried away a little)
“I’m not so sure about this now,” you stop Jack by grabbing onto his hand, your other hand wrapped around your stomach. His eyebrows furrow together as he turns to face you, grabbing onto your hands with his.
“What’s going on?” He wonders, a concerned look on his face.
“I don’t know if I can meet them,” you let out a nervous sigh, feeling the tears well up in your eyes. He frowns and squeezes your hands, thinking over his words carefully.
You two were on the way to his parents house for dinner, the first time you were going to be meeting them. He’s been talking about it for a while, and now that your relationship is more serious, he wanted you to meet them, however, in this moment, you were overthinking everything.
“Why not? It’s all they’ve been talking about for the past few days, they’re so excited to meet you.” He tries to lighten the situation, but your anxiety was through the roof.
“I…I’m scared,” you finally admit, gazing into his hypnotizing eyes. Even in the dimming light of the day, they still shined as bright as they do under the blinding lights of a hockey arena.
“There’s nothing to be scared of, babe. My mom has been waiting to show you my baby pictures since I brought up the idea, she even got the baby book out and has kept it in the living room. My dad is also looking forward to showing you all the hockey memorabilia stuff he has and pucks and other things from when he played.”
“But what if they don’t like me?” Your insecurities were taking over and once they start rolling, it’s not easy to stop. “What if they don’t think I’m smart enough or they think I’m too shy and quiet and-”
“Hey, hey, hey,” Jack coos, bringing you into his arms, holding you tightly against him. “Don’t say any of that. They’re absolutely not going to think any of those things about you, I guarantee it.”
You let his words settle in for a moment before sighing and pulling away from him.
“Alright,” you whisper.
“Do you still want to go?” He asks. You have yet to leave the hotel parking lot, Jack stands there, his eyes scanning your face for any sort of doubt or silent words you weren’t wanting to say.
“I do,” you nod in agreement. “I’m just…I’m worried.”
“I know, but there’s nothing to be worried about, I promise. They’re seriously going to love you.” His hands cup your cheeks so that you stare right at him, making sure that you knew every word he was speaking, he was telling the truth. “I’ll be right by your side the entire time. If you want to leave, how about…you tap my shoulder three times and I’ll make up an excuse for us to go. Does that sound fair?”
This is one thing you loved about Jack. He is always extremely considerate with your feelings and your well-being, giving you a chance to silently tell him things that you sometimes struggle speaking out.
“Yeah,” your voice cracks a little, which Jack notices. He sighs softly and leans forward to capture your lips with his.
“I don’t want you to do anything you’re not comfortable with, baby. If you don’t think you want to meet them tonight, just tell me and I will call them and say I’m sick.”
“No, no, I don’t want you to do that. I’m good with going, I swear,” you grin at him. He pauses once again just to make sure, narrowing his eyes at you for dramatic effect. This elicits a giggle from you, which in turn makes him laugh, and suddenly, your nerves are at ease hearing the sweet sound.
“Alright then, let’s get going.”
The drive isn’t too far, so within fifteen minutes, Jack was pulling up into his parent’s driveway, turning the car off. You sit there for a moment, staring at the large, fancy house, when Jack grabbing your hand breaks you from your daze.
No words are said between the two of you as he gives you time to process everything. It’s not until you start to exit the car that he follows in suit, immediately reaching for your hand and squeezing it tight; to make you even more comforted, he brings your entwined hands up to his face and presses a long kiss to the back of your hand, gazing down at you after he parts.
With a nod, he walks right into his house, calling out to let his parents know that you two have arrived. Within a few seconds, they’re rushing into the living room and instantly, his mom hugs you tight, rubbing your shoulder in a friendly manner.
“Hi! It is so nice to finally meet you!” She beams as she steps back. “I’m Liz.”
“Nice to meet you,” you smile at her before Jack’s dad walks over.
“It’s very lovely to meet you, (Y/N),” Ted says, shaking your hand and patting your back gently, just like his wife did.
“Nice to meet you as well. Jack’s told me a lot about you.”
“And nothing about me? That’s so rude of him,” Liz teases her son, slapping his arm in a playful way, making Jack chuckle and his face flush.
“He has mentioned you quite a bit, too,” you try to cover yourself, your heart racing in your chest. Jack sensed you were already on edge so he stepped over to you and placed his arm around your waist, pulling you close to him.
“Well, dinner is almost done, the chicken just needs to cook a little bit longer, but why don’t you guys head to the dining room for now,” Liz says, changing the subject quickly. Ted follows her to help her finish up, and when they disappear, you let out a breath that was stuck in your throat.
Jack kisses your temple and hugs you tightly.
“How are you feeling?” He wonders, his voice quiet as to not worry his parents.
“Still really nervous, but they’re so nice. I feel a little bit more relaxed in that sense.”
“Everything’s going to be fine, okay?” You nod against his shoulder and pull away to follow him to the dining room, where there were four nice plates set out, along with silverware and glasses.
“Are your brothers not home?” You ask him, continuing to look around the decorated dining room.
“No, they went to their friends’ houses for the night. My parents didn’t want to overwhelm you just yet,” he chuckles, caressing your cheek gently. A blush heats your cheeks up under his hand, and he can tell right away.
“Well, I appreciate it.”
“They’re asking about meeting you too,” he adds. “Owen wants me to take them bowling, with you, of course.”
“That sounds like fun, actually,” you agree, surprising Jack; he thought there would be some push back to his statement, but he was more than happy to hear you were open to the idea.
Just as Jack was going to respond, his mom calls out that dinner is ready. Jack grins and sticks his hand out for you to take, which you do, and he leads you right into the kitchen.
Dinner goes quite smooth, his parents ask you about yourself, as expected, the conversation is pretty light rather than interrogating, which is what you thought it would be like in your mind the entire drive over.
Jack offers to help Liz with the dishes and packing up leftovers after everyone finishes eating, leaving you and Ted to interact.
“(Y/N), come with me and I’ll show you the set up we have in the basement,” Ted says motioning for you to follow him over to the door that leads to the basement. With a look back at your boyfriend, Jack waits for you to use your signal, but when you just give him a soft grin and walk towards his dad, he can’t help but break into a huge smile.
“She’s very sweet,” his mom says once she hears the basement door shut. Jack nods and grabs a few Tupperware containers for the leftover food.
“She is. She was really nervous for tonight, so I’m glad to see her more relaxed.”
Ted brings you down the stairs to the furnished basement, first finding a large sectional against one wall and a blank wall facing it; that’s when you notice the projector above the couch, a perfect place to watch movies.
He walks over to a separate part of the basement and that’s when your jaw drops. Photos and jerseys hang along the walls, and theres a floor-to-ceiling bookshelf filled with plaques, pucks in special cases, all kinds of things, taking up an entire wall.
“Wow,” you whisper, looking over all the items. First game pucks from all the different teams he was on, autographed photos of people he’s played with, even some of Jack’s things, like the puck from his first NHL goal just a couple years ago, the Whalers jersey he wore for Whaler’s night earlier in the year, so many items covered the bookshelves, it would take too long to explain every single thing.
“It used to be just my things, from my time in college and the NHL, then Jack got drafted and I knew I had to make some space,” Ted explains, walking over and picking up a plaque. “This is an award Jack won when he was young, when he first started playing hockey. He was on a youth team here in Illinois, and was voted best player by his coaches and teammates.”
“You must have known he would be something special in the future,” you smile, looking over the wooden plaque with gold plates, his name and team name on it, along with a photo that slides in and out of a plastic sleeve.
“Oh yeah. I was always bringing him to the rink with me, he could skate really well by the time he was five, maybe even earlier. He loved it, I was always teaching him things and working with him at the local rink.”
“Well, I think you did a great job. He’s an incredible player, much like yourself and your wife,” you comment, making Ted laugh.
“Thank you, thank you. I uh, I always knew he’d get into it, and I’m glad he did. Is that how you guys met? Through the Canes?”
“Yeah, kind of. I’m friends with one of the guys’ wives, and I met Jack at a fundraiser for the team. We hit it off and just kept talking.” Ted smiles as he listens to how you two met, and you are surprised that Jack never told them the story. Though he wasn’t one to tell all of his business, even to his parents.
Ted keeps showing you things and bringing up stories from his time in the NHL, mentioning that he has a ton more that’s not displayed packed away, having to make room for Jack, of course. About fifteen minutes later, Jack comes jogging down the stairs, now wearing an old Harvard sweatshirt, a smile still on his face.
“Hey, enjoying the collection?” He wonders, stepping close to you and wrapping his arm around your waist. Your own hand wraps around him, running up and down his back.
“It’s really amazing,” you say, looking up at him for a second before looking forward again, your eyes scanning over the vast wall of memorabilia. “Lot of history.”
“Lots of nostalgia too,” Jack replies, joining you in looking at the memories from his life. “I remember some of these games, like that one puck, it's from my dad’s last game ever, in the DEL. We traveled there to watch, it was my first time out of the country.”
You smile up at your boyfriend as he describes the memory, his dad also looking over at him with a proud expression on his face.
The two of them start sharing even more stories with you and you don’t even realize how late it’s gotten until Liz comes down to check on you guys.
“It’s almost nine o’clock, you guys have been down here for a while,” she walks over to where the three of you stand, her arms crossed over her chest.
“I think we lost track of time,” Ted states, doing the same as his son and throwing an arm around his wife’s waist, pulling her into his side. Jack looks down at you, silently asking if you are ready to go. With a simple nod, he sighs and looks up at his parents.
“We’re gonna head out for the night anyways, we have some plans for tomorrow in the city,” he says, parting from your side to say goodbye to his parents.
You do the same, hugging both of them and thanking them for inviting you over and for dinner. After a bit more conversation, Jack is guiding you back upstairs and out the door, after gathering your things.
Jack stops before opening the passenger side door, instead bringing you in for a tight hug.
“I’m so proud of you,” he whispers. “I know how nervous you were and I’m so glad that you stepped out of your comfort zone for the night.”
“Your parents are lovely so they made it pretty easy,” you chuckle softly against his chest, pulling away to lean up for a kiss. He gladly gives in, and neither of you are aware, but Ted and Liz are watching the two of you from the living room window.
“I love her already,” Liz comments to her husband. Ted nods and closes the curtain to give you two some privacy again. “If he doesn’t marry her in the future, he’ll be making a huge mistake.”
#jack drury#jack drury imagines#jack drury imagine#jack drury x reader#jack drury fanfic#carolina hurricanes#carolina hurricanes fanfic#hockey fanfic#nhl fanfic#nhl imagines#imagines#fanfiction#fanfic
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Si x Friend headcannons mayhaps🥺👉👈
......ANON I LOVE YOU!!!!!!
God it's been a minute and Si's lore got lumped in with me first trying to make an oc for the game before switching into self insert-
Friend 100% was Si's first crush even if he pushed Si away at first and while keeping in mind that neither of them knew what a crush was at that point.
Even before Friend's family dies, Si's family would hold up appearances and let him hide out at their house occasionally. Si's house was nowhere as clean as Friends no matter how much clutter and other junk were cleaned up, but to both of them, because it was happier together than alone, it was home. After the accident, Si was allowed more in Friend's household and Friend was allowed to travel more frequently between his and SI's place to get what little comfort and sense of normality he could hold onto.
Keagan caused a REALLY big rift in Si and Friend throughout high school until the two of them had their initial falling out. A lot of it was Keagan super hitting on Si, and one of Keagan's friends (blanking on his name atm) not only putting down Si, but putting down Friend at the same time. It was stupid and chalked up to peer pressure and SI not actually having a good support system that he distanced himself from Friend, when in reality they were each other's biggest rocks and something Si regrets betraying before the events of the demo.
The day Si calls Friend to pick him up after breaking up with Keagan and not wanting to ride in a car with a drunk driver was one of the hardest days in Si's life. He finally allowed himself to be vulnerable and rely on the one person he knew he could count on....and oh god was he glad it was still true.
During the events of the demo- I see Si being on the side of still harboring old feelings for Friend, but not wanting to mess up the second chance they have. He assumes Friend is being his usual flirty self since Si had heard about him being more of a playboy, and you expect your friends to change over the years, so he mostly pushes his feelings down and feels like he's the only one stuck in the past.
^ This also causes him to be a little too nice and friendly with people since he's used to his best friend "casually flirting" with him and doesn't think too much of the more subtle approach most people take....like Carter for example.
I don't see Si getting kidnapped to the basement in the way that most do in that sort of route. I see Friend playing on Si's paranoia and convincing him that he can't trust anyone in the way he trusts Friend, and that it would be just like Keagan all over again. Why start all over with someone new when you can be with someone you've known....trusted....loved....your whole life? I see maybe one friend that Si makes outside of Friend possibly dying if they pry too much into Si's disappearance, but I would also like to think that if Si went willingly, Friend would try his best to scare them off instead of risking Si being upset with him more than he already is with the confusion of being gaslit and essentially talked into living in a fancy cell.
Alternatively....we can have two dorks who have been love with each other since there were kids where one person knew all along and the other took longer to realize it until their sense of love and comfort suddenly wasn't there anymore. Si and Friend are both on the demi spectrum iirc, but it takes longer for Friend to realize it and they fall victim to stupid high school bs in between everything. In this case, I see the cat cafe date being canon, with SI wearing a cute outfit just to TRY and shoot his shot again hopefully picking up on Friend's signals in the right way this time. Of course, this still means that Friend is weary of every move Si makes, but it opens up for more measures of security on Si's end. Si'll never know who killed the man who touched his arm or the woman who got to close to him while he was walking, and slowly Friend has more of a grasp on Si's day to day life to make sure he NEVER leaves Friend in the same way his sisters did. To Friend....he has nothing left to hope or LIVE for if he doesn't have Si, and he's not giving an inch of an opening for it to happen again....if he can manage it.
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I've been trying to articulate this idea for a while and I think I finally got it.
So there's a troll sickness that only affects Grey trolls, or trolls that had been Grey before. When they lose their pigment they also lose something that fights off this illness in brightly colored trolls.
Modern day trolls don't know about it, thank goodness some of the kingdoms kept good records, they just think Grey trolls die young. That's part of why most kept their distance. They wouldn't be able to camouflage and be eaten, or they'd get sick and have no one to take care of them because they pushed everyone away, or one day they'd just, disappear. Three to five years is the longest most trolls have heard of a Grey troll living. There was one country troll that made it nine. A stubborn, crotchety old troll named Willow who became a grey troll the same day she became a widow.
The sickness only takes about twenty percent of Grey trolls.
Others are too scared to leave their homes so they starve to death. Too numb to do anything but sleep so they die of thirst. Too despondent to see that they aren't a burden so they walk themselves into the beast filled forests and never come back. That's why colorful trolls almost instinctively avoid them. Because they'll just end up dying and knowing them will make that hurt and what living thing doesn't try to avoid pain when it can?
Sickness only takes two out of every ten.
That wasn't so bad before every troll in the world went grey. Thanks Barb.
Trolls started getting sick, then they started dying. The mortality rate is at about seventy percent. Funk found their old records and luckily, a potential cure. I'm calling it Grey Away because I think I'm hilarious. It's a bit of a drive to get but Branch immediately volunteers. He doesn't tell anyone that it's because trolls who were grey for longer are more susceptible to the sickness and he wants to get away from the masses.
Naturally Poppy joins too. The brothers, who were visiting to make sure Branch was okay, all decided to join too. They'd get there faster in Rhonda anyway.
Cue road trip of reconciliation! Proper time for the bros to come to terms with everything that happened and how rough it was for Branch especially. They get good at brothering too. Teasing in a way that's funny (usually about Poppy), making food and then stealing bites of said food, playing games and taking them way too seriously, and flipping the table when they catch someone cheating.(It was John Dory, he was feeding Rhonda cards. It was not subtle.) (No one ever catches Floyd who'd been cheating since the game started.)
The first symptom is losing your voice. It takes a day to realize Branch has stopped talking.
The next day he's grey again, another symptom. Poppy mentions that it's a little weird seeing him like that again. She was just getting used to his other colors.
Bros have to put in more effort to understand their youngest who was pretending he wasn't such because he was worried if he got to be too much work they'd leave him again.
Cue healing. And. You know. Saving troll kind. Again.
#trolls#trolls band together#trolls branch#dreamworks trolls#branch trolls#trolls 3#trolls brozone#trolls floyd#brozone#trolls poppy#trolls john dory#trolls jd#trolls Bruce#trolls epidemic#trolls grey away
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@zerokrox-blog this got out of hand btw
How Keverejeandreil Got Together
obviously we start with Andreil. they've been together the longest. no surprise there, so that's step one
let's head over to USC. Jean and Jeremy are talking about Kevin and are a little tipsy and they end up kissing. PAUSE ✋
back to Palmetto. Andrew and Kevin are Juniors now, Neil is a Sophomore. around second semester Kevin is so damn exhausted that he falls asleep on Andrew. now they've been known to snuggle, but they definitely don't do that. Andrew realizes that his feelings for Kevin from his Freshman year never actually went away. the next day, he talks to Neil about it. Neil goes "if I was to date anyone else, it'd probably be Kevin or Jean". Andrew is like wait hold up, Jean is hot asf. so they talk about Jean and Kevin and how they want to dick them down etc. etc. FAST FORWARD.
now it's Kevin, Jean, and Andrew's Senior year. Jeremy is away on a pro team, and while they technically never started dating after the kiss (or even talked about it), Jean is still lonely. that's his partner, and while he's healed more since the beginning, he's still on edge. so Andrew, Neil, and Kevin fly Jean over to Palmetto for winter break. and, well.... stuff happens. Neil gets to watch Andrew put his mouth to work on someone else and realizes he quite likes it. Neil makes out with Kevin and Jean but doesn't go any further with them. Jean goes home.
and realizes that Jeremy wanted to surprise him and come back for winter break. whoops. Jeremy smiles and says he's glad Jean is making friends (Jean didn't tell him what they got up to), and he has to go back to the Pro team now. he says Jean don't worry I had a great time with my friends here, it's okay. but Jean is like no I'm gonna miss you, kisses him again, they fuck. back to Palmetto.
Kevi joins Andreil. now we have Kandreil. second step complete. Kevin gets a text from both Jeremy and Jean saying they have feelings for the other man. he makes a group chat, sends the screenshots of the messages, and leaves the group chat.
Jerejean get together. 3rd step complete.
NOW IT GETS FUN.
Andrew is very gay and very horny. caves at the sight of a single ab. Kevin is emotional, just came to terms with being bi, allowing himself to be attracted to men, and realizes the same thing Andrew did. all four of these men are hot as fuck. (Jean and Jereny came to the realization a long time ago. Andrew was Jeremy's first Exy crush)
and they're all on the same Olympic team (2010). and they're all rooming together. so. they start with truth or dare. then it escalates to spin the bottle. and then escalates from there. by the time they leave the Olympics, they have a group chat jokingly (?) named "The Polycule"
they're not on the same Pro teams, so yk, it's hard. they all visit Neil during his college breaks, but for the most part they're across the country from each other.
until 2012. Neil immediately signed to Andrew's team when he graduated, Jean is on Jeremy's team, Kevin is alone and feels bad. he doesn't want to transfer just for dick though. Andrew and Neil love Colorado. Jean and Jeremy realize the pro team they're on is incredibly homophobic and can't deal with it anymore. they go "fuck you, you lost your two best players" and transfer to Kevin's team. they live with Kevin because it's easier that way. Kevin has fucked them both of course, but he's not dating them in the same way he's dating Andreil. so he calls them and he's like "babes, would it be cheating if I dated these two during the season, and dated you two in the off season?"
Andrew and Neil are confused but down, so Kevin dates Jerejean in season and Andreil out of season. step 4 ✔️
2014 Olympics time. they're all 110% chill with sharing Kevin, and things are great. they fuck again, but then Jean and Andrew are like.... making out. and not because they're horny either. so they all decide they can be long distance boyfriends. step 5 complete, Keverejeandreil Polycule complete
but long distance is frustrating
UNTIL
the Utah Pro team puts a bomb ass trade offer for Kevin, Jeremy, and Jean (it's fiction i can do what I want). and because Neil and Andrew's house is right on the border of Utah and Colorado, they all move in together.
Keverejeandreil 💕
sorry this got so long
#aftg#all for the game#andrew minyard#neil josten#kevin day#jean moreau#jeremy knox#usc trojans#palmetto state foxes#keverejeandreil#the foxhole court#the sunshine court
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ive been hung up on kitten nd jj during their pre-relationship days!!! theyve been running around each other (thats putting it kindly) since forever nd i cant help but think about their first times together :( their first date, first kiss, the first time they fucked, nd the first time they said i love you (who said it first? :0)
seeing that as they already knew each other quite well, it makes me wonder ab how different their dynamic was when they were a situationship… nd how did jj handle her antics? did he have less patience then? makes me think about how they even became a situationship in the first place !!!!!!! pls expand on this moony i need to know :3
— 🦢
ugh i literally sat up to answer this this is a GREAT set of questions!!!
these are two people who have known each other forever im talking 3rd/4th grade and kinda always been friends/friendly but not really "hanging out" til middle school because jj + the pogues were always just more popular than kitten and her friends ukwi?
so on a level they've always gotten along well, teachers would sit them together thinking they'd cancel each other out only for them to be worse and having to eventually be permanently put in separate classes LOL.
their first "date" was really the start of their situationshup when they were about 15 or so, there was one of the movies in the park during the summer that was playing psycho and jj invited her to go. at this point he liked her more than she liked him and he knew she was the only girl in class that wasn't talking out her ass when she said she liked the same shit he did. it went about as okay as most teenage dates go and it also ended in their first kiss. she kissed him, freaked the fuck out and started laughing immediately after then ran off to her mom who was waiting in the car. that was absolutely the start of her making jj's head spin, he was lovesick for about a week until she called him a weird loser for looking too deep into it and he just moved on (partially).
the first time they had sex was not long after--only thing is she was a virgin and jj very much was not and he didn't know! she's always flirting with people and kissing people so he figured she'd been around as much as he did, especially because she was eager and they had their little yang yang yang. following the trend of their first kiss she kinda laughed after and kicked him out of her house half naked which was awkward as hell because he ran into her mom (luckily she dgaf) and this was the moment he officially like...got sick of her. not sick sick of her but between this and the date he genuinely wanted to be with her but she was playing around so he said "well if she wants to be funny im about to get hilarious" and he became an assssholeeeeee like real bad. i'm talking flirting with other girls and kissing them at parties and eventually leaving with them knowing she'll see/hear about it.
this goes on for years mind you, everytime he thinks she's softening and they may have a shot at dating she does something mean and closes herself off and he thinks she's playing games when she's just emotionally constipated and also dealing with her own shit? especially because she starts cycling through boyfriends like it's nothing and only giving jj the time of day as a rebound but really she's just terrified of how much she likes him and all her ex's are like evil to her so she just. she prefers the controlled chaos of her situationship with jj. she knows their pattern and sticks to it.
when they finally get together though that's another thing, she has to make the first move because obviously jj doesn't trust her and it's fuckin hard man, she's got a pit in her stomach the whole time and while she's making an effort she's not gonna change overnight so jj, despite being stubborn and making her sweat for it, meets her halfway and they find themselves getting together so easily it makes her feel like an idiot.
she says i love you first, and it was the first time he ever saw her get sappy and emotional. she'd had a shit day like no other and jj comes in loud as fuck just happy to see her only to notice she's crying and he completely flips tryna figure out what's wrong, threatening to beat someone up but she just wants him to lay down with her. and he does, for once he's completely quiet and she starts crying again, jj thinks he did something wrong so he asks what he did and she just went "shut the fuck up! im crying cause i love you or some shit." and he just starts fuckin cheesin.
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"Just a photo of me with my lovely new girlfriend, Nikki! We met on Tinder and she was soooo eager to date a trans girl like me! I asked her if she loved girls with huge boobs like me and she asked if I'm trans. I was surprised she could tell and said that I was. She told me it was obvious I was born a boy, that I didn't pass very well. But she really wanted to hook up still, saying she loved how boys who transition into girls like me wind up with such big boobs that they're kind of a give away. Because cis girls would get a reduction and hate being so busty, but trans girls keep them and let them grow to bovine proportions. Since we have boy libidos and get turned on by monster tits and other perverted stuff. But she said she's a bit of a pervert, too.
I told her I was flattered but I'm not especially kinky. She promised me if we got together she'd make me kinkier than I ever could've dreamed. Sooooo I just had to say yes. We've been together three months, but I'm still not sure what she meant exactly..... We have sex and she encourages me to use my cock, although she tops, she likes me to stroke my cock and edge for her. She likes to tell me when I can or can't cum, which is pretty fun, although a bit frustrating since I swear I've been getting hornier since I met her! And my cock has actually grown, weirdly enough! That happen to any other trans girls at nineteen? I haven't missed any of my meds. But I've gone from four inches fully erect to almost ten! It's embarrassing having a big dick but at least Nikki seems to like it, joking how it just proves I'm really a boy deep down. It's weird but my heart flutters when she calls me a boy, especially in public. It actually makes my cock hard..... Oh, and suddenly my stubble and beard are coming in! Is that normal? I've been on blockers since ten and hormones at twelve. Should I see my doctor or do you girls think I should just let it come in? I'm OK at covering it with makeup but I feel like it's coming in really fast. Oh well, hope you all have a lovely day! ❤️"
"Fuck..... It's been two years since my last post because, well, as everyone was commenting, yes Nikki was a TERF, and yes.... she was sneaking me testosterone. You all called it and I totally ignored it. Now I'm seeing what she meant by kinky.... It was one thing to control when I cum, but now my life revolves around Nikki's fetishes. It started with her detransitioning me, training me to edge and not cum unless she allowed it. Soon my voice dropped, my body hair and beard grew thick. I couldn't hide that I was a guy at all. And fuck it made me so damn hard! I feel disgusting, thinking of how I threw my beautiful body away for Nikki. But my cock is so big now! It aches to be stroked and played with all day, but instead every time I get an erection I have to eat or chug weight gain shakes until Nikki gets home and lets me cum.
Nikki apparently loves extremely fat men and loves turning beautiful trans girls into fat men even more. I'm definitely not the first or last trans girl she's done this to. I even had to watch as she made me get my boobs chopped off. Reduced to a flat, boy's chest, as I was only numbed, kept awake as the surgeon destroyed my perfect breasts. Nikki was in the corner, controlling a set of vibrating toys, one in my ass, the other inserted into my fat cock. I was still thin and pretty that day, and it's one of the few videos Nikki actually lets me jerk off to when I'm allowed to cum. That, and videos of other trans girls she's dated enduring the same thing. Always still slim and beautiful, breasts at least a HH-Cup or bigger. Stubble starting to show on their faces, voices just beginning to crack as they're forced to watch a surgeon dismantle and ruin their beautiful, estrogen-fattened breasts.
Now my whole life is sitting home eating. Sometimes Nikki goes days without coming home and letting me cum, since she has so many other former trans girls to keep fed and growing, making sure none of us are breaking our rules, being naughty, and gooning on our own. Although, as a boy the temptation to edge and stroke and goon all day is always at the forefront of my brain. Eating is the only thing that quiets my urges..... temporarily. So I eat more and more, gorging myself, becoming a hairy tub of lard for Nikki, knowing I'll never, ever pass as a girl again. Not that I was ever very convincing.... I can't wait to get as fat as possible to show Nikki what a devoted, pathetic hog I've become! Although it is fun to watch her get mad when I can't help myself and I jerk off for hours on end to girls getting forcibly detransitioned....."
#detrans kink#mtf detrans kink#mtftm detrans kink#mtftm nsft#mtftm kink#mtftm jackoff fuel#detrans feedee#mtf weight gain#weight gain kink
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Rainy day (Cathleen Bate Imagine)
Requested: yes
Summary: Cassie has a rare day off with you, spending it cuddling
Word Count: 757
Warning(s): none
It wasn't often you had days like these. The outside world was gloomy, rain drizzling down and hitting the windows, giving a calming ambiance. You're sat on the couch, drink in hand, cuddled up to the love of your life. Her strong arms wrapped around you as your back rests against her front. You didn’t get to spend a whole lot of time together, so this was a nice change of pace.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Her sweet voice pulls you out of your thoughts as you blankly stare out of the window. You pick up her hand and lay a soft kiss on her knuckles. “You know I love you more and more every day, Cassie” You say, followed by a satisfied sight as you take a sip of your drink that has started to cool. A soft chuckle fills the air “I love you too baby.” She says putting a firm kiss on the side of your head and giving your body a firm squeeze.
A comfortable silence fills the air as you finish your drink and put the cup on the coffee table softly. You turn around, straddling her lap, a sweet smile on your face. She gives you a wide smile, something that makes your heart skip a beat, before planting a soft kiss on her plush lips.
Resting your head against her forehead, you pick up one of her hands and intertwine your fingers. “You know… I used to think love at first sight was absolutely ridiculous, till I saw that beautiful smile of yours” you say with a soft chuckle. The smile on her face is wider than ever, a soft blush gracing her face. “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.” Cassie admits bashfully, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear. Causing an equal blush to appear on your face. You giggle before attacking her face with a series of soft pecks, catching her off guard and getting a soft laugh out of her.
“How can that be true if you’re the best thing that ever happened to ME” you say, continuing the attack. She captures your lips in a passionate kiss, putting all the love and affection into it. “Two things can be true at once” Cathleen says catching her breath.
“I wish you were home more often.” You admit, a small frown on your features, as a weak sigh escapes your lips. Her lips twist into a sad line. “ I know, I’m trying to get a bit more time off, but you know how it is” she tells you as she plays with a piece of your hair behind your back avoiding your gaze. “ Trying is good enough for me and at least you’re here now.” You encourage, tho you can’t deny that not seeing her as much hurts you a bit. She leaves early and comes home late, not leaving a whole lot of time to spend together. You knew that was the case when the two of you got together, but it seems like your shared time has dwindled even more since.
Cassie nods, pulling you into her chest. “Speaking of…..I got every Saturday off, unless something crazy happens.” She proudly announces. Your eyes widen as you pull away to look at her gorgeous face. “You’re not pulling my leg are you?!” You say loudly and excitedly. Cassie gives you a small nod with a smirk. “That’s amazing! You’re the best!” You let her know, giving her a firm hug.
“Though I would spend every moment with you if permitted”
“Hey some time is better than no time!”
“That’s true! So what would you like to do on our day off?” She asks as she shifts her body to lay on her side, pulling you down with her. “You” you chuckle with a smirk, causing a loud laugh to rumble out of her chest. “But if that’s not an option, we could maybe go to that park down the road and have a picnic or go to that museum I’ve been wanting to go to” you ramble off, a look of awe on her face as she intently listens the sound of rain starting to soften now. “That’s always an option,” She winks back “But how about we go to the museum and then go to the park on our way back for a picnic?” She suggests. “That sounds perfect” You tell her, nuzzling your face into her chest as she pulls you close.
“I love you”
“Love you too, Star.”
Masterlist
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With love,
-K
#cathleen bate x reader#cathleen bate fluff#cathleen bate#bnha fanfiction#bnha fic#mha fanfic#mha fic#bnha fluff#mha fluff#mha fanfiction
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my best friend has been very distant w me lately and i asked today if she wanted to hang out and she said she probably couldn't bc it's her brothers birthday but she would let me know if she could and i have her location and i just looked and she's at her boyfriends house rn....
#we have it bc we're roomates so we started sharing locations when we first moved in like in case someone doesn't come home at night or smth#she recently told me that she wants to move out bc she has always wanted to live alone and she can finally afford it. and i asked her#directly like is there an issue because she is so non confrontational so she has never ever mentioned me doing anything that bothers her#and i said please tell me if there's something wrong because it would really suck if there was and i never got a chance to fix it because#you never told me. and she said no it has nothing to do with that i really just feel like it's time for me to live on my own. and a couple#days ago she was like okay i'm next in line for my apartment i'll probably move out in april. and i try to get her to hang out still and#she always has something else going on and i swear every night this week she's been at her boyfriends.#and if i see her around our apartment and try to make conversation at all she's so like short about it and barely responds like will only#give one word answers. i feel like it kind of started when i started dating e but i realized that i was spending less time with her and i#didn't want to be the girl that loses all my friends bc of a boyfriend so i started specifically reaching out to hang out with her and she#says no most of the time and never asks me. like i don't know what else i can do.#i'm like maybe it's bc of her boyfriend? bc they've been on again off again for a long time and previously when they were together it was#really distant with her like i barely saw her EVER. and they were mostly broken up for the past couple years and have been together i think#for a while again... but she knows i don't approve of that relationship and so she would like not say when they were talking again. so maybe#since lately they've been hanging out or dating or WHATEVER she doesn't fucking tell me what's going on with him. maybe that's why.#i literally like try to think of ways it could be my fault and maybe i'm being crazy but i cannot even think to blame myself for more than a#fleeting second bc i'm like. i have ASKED HER directly if there is an issue or something i do that bothers her and she says no. so even if#i'm somehow pissing her off would i ever know to change anything?? i just feel so frustrated bc it's like she's an entirely different person#to me. like this is not the person i know. and i don't know what else i could possibly do like i feel like we need to sit down and have a#conversation about it but what good does that do if she just acts like nothing is wrong. but i don't want to lose my friend i have such a#hard time making friends. i've known her since i was 14 like i can't imagine my life without her. we were the only two in our whole friend#group in high school to get out of the church i still love those other girls but we have so little in common now.
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I think it is finally time to bite the bullet and begin the long and arduous process of getting my slew of illnesses (mental and physical) diagnosed so I can actually pursue treatment and/or accommodations with jobs because I uh, cannot do this shit anymore
#I am so tired of dragging myself to work in severe amounts of pain and misery#because if I don’t I’ll get fired#I hate doctors and any time I have ever gone none of my concerns have actually been addressed#(granted I have not gone to an actual doctor in like 8 years and they never listened to me because my mom would always talk over me and#claim everything was fine but ya know)#my migraines have become dibilitating and I’m like 95% sure I have endometriosis#not to mention the insane combo of adhd depression and ptsd that leaves me a mess more often than not#and obvi none of these things are being treated#plus my job literally DOESNT LET me take time off like it’s dead ass NOT ALLOWED#since I started there has been ONE time I got more then two days off in a row and I had to scrap and claw and beg and plead for that#so I can’t even call out because of these issues more often than not#because no time off and they only give me SIX HOURS of sick time a month#and when you work EIGHTY HOURS A MONTH that is quite literally NOTHING it’s not even a full day#and I…. just simply cannot keep living this way I feel like death more often than not#and I am too exhausted to do quite literally ANYTHING#so yeah…. I think I’m gonna have to actually find a doctor and a psychiatrist and get some of these things clinically diagnosed so I can#pursue some kind of accommodations#otherwise I’m gonna fucking lose it#kaz rambles
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Y'know there already is such a nonexistent market for oni art in general so the fact that I wanna draw more au art is killing me. Like I draw for fun and don't need notes to be happy with a piece but also I need ppl to view my art and be curious and ask questions because while I may not desperately need approval I do desperately need excuses to gush abt the things I like
#rat rambles#oni posting#Im thinking abt the rabbit au clones again#in particular the two main nails clones I love them sm theyre so silly#we have guy shaking and crying while internally actually being rly relieved and guy smiling and laughing while being plagued by the Horrors#I should probably give them nicknames but idk what would work best#but yeah the older one is the one whos chip got damaged and is stuck pumping them full of stimulants and hasnt slept in 3 months#and the younger one has been spending the past three months spending day and night at gravitas working their ass off#it wasnt until they got hit by a rly intense wave of fatigue that they were finally pushed into actually going home to rest#at which point the older one was like yo whats up I didnt expect that to actually work lol#things are initially very chaotic after that since younger nails just found out a Lot and older nails didnt rly have a plan for this#they were basically just finishing up a project a past nails clone started since they had nothing better to do#at first it was because they were hoping it could maybe disable their own malfunctioning chip but as the days turned into weeks they#swiftly realized that even if it could disable their chip its probably already far too late for that to save them#and even if the months of no sleep didnt basically instantly take them out there would still be a half broken neural chip in their brain#which likely already had caused complications that they just havent noticed because of the everything else going on#so while they still finished up the project it became a much more half hearted ordeal that they honestly werent expecting to work#but evidently it did leading to the awkward experience of explaining to someone that they're a clone#younger nails hadnt necessarily suspected anything to that degree but they had noticed that smth was off#which is part of the reason they spent so much time working in an attempt to ignore it#so the revelation actually helped somw things click into place and while it wasnt good news by any means it was kind of a relief in a way#not in the sense that now they are in active danger of dying at any time but yknow#they both die eventually ofc but yknow at least they get to be povs of sorts#I mean not much they could do to do anything abt their situation even if one of them wasnt basically doomed to slowly die already
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