#she has a pet maggot but i have to think of a name for it
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I made up some facts about them literally just as an excuse to draw them some more god bless
#rawrxd gfs#blood#spacecreate#oc tag#i got really entertained by the idea of Ali being a vegitarian zombie lol. she can digging in the ground for tubers!!!!!#she has a pet maggot but i have to think of a name for it#Gabby dislikes lightning because she keeps getting struck by it when shes not paying attention#it doesnt kill her or anything it just feels sooooo weird! >_< lmao#Ali is shy and a bit guarded and Gabby is more outgoing but can be a people pleaser to a fault yaaayyyy#colorful stuff#OH and Ali dislikes fungus bc it feels weird when it grows on you#she sees a mushroom and reacts how most people do when they see a spider
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Heartless Madness
The title is based off of a really cool powermetal song. I'm probably going to try and name most if not all after a powermetal song tbh.
tw: Yandere? (Might need a follow up fic), aftermath of rape, aftermath of torture, the Drukhari are here so yeah
This was a hard darling to come up with... as while I love Iron Warriors she had to be the right balance of interesting enough and made of tough stuff and also to be easily mailable/moldable. I might eventually do a "least yandere" poll and see who wins and either reworks that boy or just gives them a chapter serf darling. I'm doing civilian darlings because 1) More fun 2) more terrifying
Harram the Wallbreaker let his heavy lumbering steps kick up the dust on the cracked and torn pavement. They had replied to a distressed signal from this agriworld and the warband needed another world like this to keep the war machine going. In the midst of a Drukhari attack. The night was cold and quiet... till he watched a number of humans turn their heads to the East. "What is it." His voice rumbles out of his terminator armor.
"This is the second night we've heard a baby cry. We think it might be a Drukhari trap as all that has been observed over there were unfortunate victims dying." A man said.
Harram huffed out causing a billow of steam to leave at the same time of his huff making his armor look far more alive then it was. "Has anyone checked?"
"No my lord."
He turned to the East and began the slow march. If there was an ambush waiting to happen Harram was certain he could handle it and if there was a baby there still alive then perhaps they were made of sterner stuff... like iron.
He walked past naked bodies chained to the ground in various states of decomposition. All of them chained to the ground with some xenos looking bear trap like contraption. He turned the sensitivity of the audials up and he could hear the faint crying. How it would pause then start up again.
He stopped in the mist as the crying soon turned to laughter and he pushed his armor's capabilities to the limit. "Shh Ferum... no more tears... I know you're hungry... mommy has nothing left to give." He could hear her weak hums as he slowly walked closer.
He sees her on the thermals first and scrolls through all of the different settings to get the full picture as he walks closer. He can see maggots in the lashes across her back, one leg encased fully in the xenos torture device, blood and a high degree likelihood of xenos sperm paints her inner thighs, he can tell starvation and dehydration are setting in for her, and he can tell her hair was recently cut in such a jagged motion. Harram suspects for a trophy or for other things worse should she have been found... entertaining enough for the xenos.
"Has the Emperor answered my prayers?" She speaks so softly as he watches her weakly turn her head. She ends up just rolling over, her watches her eyes close in pain as large grey eyes look at him with a tiny fist jammed into a small mouth. Ugly brusing paints her face, bite marks littering her breasts, less cuts on the front just far more bruising.
"No. He did not send me." Harram replies walking closer.
"You are one of his angels." She sighs in relief.
"I am not. I am something far worse." He tilts his head slightly thinking, "I am a devil... a fallen angel." He chuckles more to himself at his poetic nature.
"Still an angel." He sees her bloody smile. But he can see a look in her eyes ones of grim acceptance, "Have you come to save me? Or just take my baby?"
"Originally just for the baby." He notes the sad smile on her face as her eyes water and she just nods slowly petting his head. "But... I can take you too. What you will return to is not going to be the same."
"I've been changed by this... as long as whatever I return to is better than being raped by xenos I'll say that's an improvement." She bitterly laughs letting her tears fall. He watches the infant try to breastfeed once more. The exhaustion as Harram realizes the baby looks fed and hardly any exposure.
"I am going to contact my brothers to see how to remove this without removing your leg." He says watching her nod.
"Thank you dearest angel..."
Harram just sighed and talked with his brothers as he started to pull the pins in their specific order. He ignored the younger warrior's persistant asking of why he was even doing this. The child was more than healthy enough, simply take them and put the mother out of her misery... even if you ignored that they brought up the points of she would be in recovery for so long. Perhaps that was why Harram followed Endion he was considered sentimental amongst the Iron Warriors and left to start his own warband.
They all did not fit their genesires ideal vision of iron... but they were still of iron! He pulled a pin out to quickly earning a whimper from her throat as tears flowed from her eyes. "Please... I do not wish to be trouble."
"Do not speak mortal. I could have killed you if I did not wish to deal with this burden."
Esteemed terminator Harram. We have movement a few clicks north of you. It's the xenos!
Harram lifted his head as he heard her whimpers as she could hear the near silent thrum of their crafts. He pulled a decorative pelt from his shoulder off and covered her up with it. "Stay there. Do not move at all lest I crush you." He watched her pull her son to her chest and do her best to keep the infant safe with only her body to protect them. The pelt was to simply keep her out of the view of the xenos. "You will probably lose HEARING." He roared the only warning before the twinlinked bolter started throwing the explosive rounds down wind.
His leg joints locked in place, so he would be less likely to crush her and the babe. "Brother's I have started to engage."
"Are you being soft again, Harram?" He could hear Endion's warm voice suddenly connect to the vox channel.
He watched rounds connect with one of the small crafts as it was just a handful of the quick xenos. "No brother I am being like Iron!"
"What have you found then?"
"IRON!" The large chain sword slams down being lucky enough to catch one of them trying to run past and slice at his joints. He couldn't hear the infant screaming over the scream of the chains. He couldn't hear her broken sobs of begging to be killed then be hurt by them again. Harram was focused on the combat. "I have found Iron! I refuse to let them RUST!"
Harram has to unlock his legs to turn around and charge the cocky xeno. But his swings were too slow as the xeno was slowly peeling away sheets of ceramite. Not once during this exchange he thought that this was a tactical error... other brothers would see this as an error but then again they would also be as stubborn as he would be to claim the iron.
It screeched as he saw his Orichalcum, he questions not when he saw her as his, sitting up having thrown one of the knife like pins into it. The tired weak smile on her face is replaced by terror as she rolls to shield her child as it charges but that was enough time for him to slam into the xeno and start crushing it.
When he was done he turned to her watching her writhe on the ground as blood oozed out as in it's dying moment it must have activated the contraption. She looks up at him in pure pain as he pulls out his knife and watches it heat up. "Pray that you are made of Iron."
She bitterly barks, "I was an Iron worker!" She half screams, "I'm half metal shavings at this point!" She shrieks as he doesn't give her much time to think as he just removes the whole leg.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Iron was apart of her. His Orichalcum. And her son Ferum. He learned quite a bit about her during her recovery. She was an Ironworker and so was her dead husband. She had lost him before Ferum was born... meaning that Harram could focus his attentions upon her without any meddlers.
Endion had teased him about his fondness... but it had been so long since he found anyone he could call iron. Though Endion was hardly one to complain as Harram would find him stealing Ferum away and of course teased the warlord of entering his "nesting" phase again. To which he threatened to take his Orichalcum away... and Harram could only silently stew as he would not risk losing her to a far more... charming one of his bretherin.
"Oh hello Harri-ham." She said in a cutesy voice as she was busy feeding Ferum some baby food. "Sorry I was talking with him." She just say softly. Harram just huffed softly. "Hey Harram... I want to deeply thank you for saving my life and that of Ferum. I don't know how to repay you."
"You have no need to repay me."
"Well I was thinking that I should be good to go back home soon." She hardly noticed Harram stop in his actions of getting his own food before he turned around with a bowl in hand just shoveling some food into his mouth. "I don't want to be a burden on you any more than I already have."
"What of your nightmares?"
"I'm a big girl Harram I'll have to sleep alone eventually." She chuckles as whenever he has been in the room at night she ends up usually in his bed or asleep on the plush chair in his work room just afraid to be alone... or when the night terrors come back how he grounds her. And perhaps he had grown content with the small warmth in his bed... he had never understood while Endion would bring mortals to his bed.
Not till he had her under him begging for him to fuck the xenos touch away... to replace the repulsive feelings... to help her feel clean again. "What if I don't want you to go." Harram said a little darkly just watching her blink and look at him owlishly.
"I... I..."
"Just stay for a little while longer... I can help you get things ready for you to return to, yes?"
"Oh... alright." She says softly smiling at him not realizing that the simple goalpost of 'being ready enough to leave' would keep moving further and further... and he doubts she will complain... too much.
#tw: torture#tw: rape#tw: assault#tw: Drukhari#tw: yandere#Yandere#Yandere Space Marine#Yandere Iron Warrior#Space Marine#Iron Warrior#warhammer 40k#Drukhari#single mom reader#widow reader
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CATEGORY 5 AUTISM EVENT IN PRACTICE
Remember what I was saying about that parasite AU? Yeah I finally got around to it. Here’s some doodles of the designs.
Rushed a bit with fungi-face and fungi-head since it was really close to bedtime (yes I still do have a bedtime despite being towards the end of being a minor, crazy I know)
(Note clarification in alt text for those who couldn’t read it)
Some extra notes about characters:
Peppino sometimes uses bits of himself in mushroom pizzas. His ingredients are extra fresh after all. Also why he has so many gills but not a lotta caps on him.
Gustavo and Brick are the only non-parasites (excluding fungi-face and Noise I guess, but he’s more parasite than ant at this point and Noise still has parasites inside that he uses so ehhh), as Gustavo practices commensalism on Brick by riding on top of brick with his suction cup just like real remoras do!
Corpseman (wow one of the few name changes) does try to keep his smell nicer as he has to smell nice for the public. Can’t have people thinking he rolls around in maggots for a living… he does have a large collection of flies and thus maggots to help pollinate some non-living corpse flowers as they look just like him and are thus very pretty to him.
The vigilante (probably the design I’m most proud of) likes to ride around in his pet sturgeon by ratatouilleing her with her tongue-stub thingy. He never drinks the blood from her though, he treats his sturgeon very well, in fact!
The Noise still runs NTV and as an easy way to rack in views, actually uses the 2 green-banded broodsacs in his antennae to catch the attention of anyone who looks at them for a little too long. Really scared of going outside though, particularly birds, downside to having 2 literal parasites inside you that really want you to get eaten by a bird.
Fake Peppino, as mentioned in the notes, is constantly taking over and stopping taking over a poplar, the same fungus Peppino is made of. Basically he’s rapidly decomposing himself and his host fungus.
Fungi-face was just a normal queen ant looking to start a colony until Fungi-head offered her a whole tower of colonies, at a cost. What she didn’t know was that the cost was her free will and while she does technically rule over her colony in the tower, she doesn’t do anything as all free will has been sapped from her by Fungi-head
God this post is long, hello there if you read all that
#long post#wanna do a part 2 with the other characters#pizza tower#peppino spaghetti#gustavo#brick#pepperman#the vigilante#the noise#fake peppino#pizzaface#pizzahead#god that’s too many tags I think
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hiya! gil has a lot of pets throughout the show, like Hank, and at least one spider, and his cockroaches and some other bugs (and the foetal pig, which i personally choose to count. i bet he talks to it.) i was wondering if you or anyone else knew an approximate list of them, more so his bugs than anything else.
in one of the episodes (i think its post grissom) nick and greg find a tarantula and greg is pleased to note that its an old friend "hey thats little stevie! he's been missing for years!" i wonder if stevie was ever mentioned by name or if any of gil's other bugs were?
bit of a random one i know, but i do so love gil and his managerie of insects (and Others)
hi, anon!
so here's the thing: despite knowing grissom is something of an animal lover, we actually learn very little about what pets he has over the course of the show. basically the only two named ones we ever hear about are, as you mention, hank the dog and stevie the tarantula.
and, for the record, stevie had never been mentioned prior to the events of episode 10x01 "family affair."
while we know that at any given time, he has a "menagerie" of insects otherwise, seldom are they identified by species, and never are they referred to by specific names.
that so, the best "census" of his animals i can offer is as follows:
of course, he has his irradiated fetal pig (occasionally referred to as "miss piggy," though it's unclear if that is her official name) from the beginning of the show.
he also, as mentioned, from s7 on, has hank (though it's unclear under what circumstances he got him and/or how he decided on the name).
then, in episode 01x22 "evaluation day," sara lists a litany of animals in his care, including a pet tarantula who may or may not be one and the same as "little stevie" (who, as stated, is never mentioned by name prior to s10) and a maggot farm. she also claims he has a komodo dragon on back order, but considering that they are an endangered species and also are not the type of animal that your average person can care for in their private home—they are about ten feet long, can weigh up to 200 lbs., can run up to 13 mph, feed on large game like water buffalo, and have a venomous bite that makes them dangerous to handle—she is probably either a) being facetious, or, b) confusing a komodo dragon with a monitor lizard. in either case, grissom doesn't seem to actually have either a dragon or a lizard in his possession at this time.
in episode 02x05 "scuba doobie-doo," he acquires a silphid beetle from the crime scene, which he refers to, in-episode, as "paul;" however, it is unclear both if he intends to keep the beetle in the long term as a pet and, if so, if paul is actually what he's named him.
in episode 02x10 "ellie," he owns about a dozen madagascar hissing cockroaches, which he intends to race at an entomology conference in duluth, mn. he mentions that his roaches' competitors have names (such as "cocky balboa" and "priscilla, queen of the gutters"), so it's probable that his roaches have names, too. however, if so, he never states what they are.
in episode 07x13 "redrum," he gifts sara the cocoon of an unknown moth or butterfly species, sent to her from walden pond. she elects to keep this cocoon in his office until it hatches. it is unknown a) what kind of insect is inside of the cocoon, b) what becomes of said insect after it hatches, and c) what, if anything, grissom and sara name it.
in csi: vegas episode 01x03 "under the skin," grissom states that hank was the best dog he ever had, which implies he has had other dogs in his life. however, it's uncertain when he had these dogs. it's possible he had childhood dogs and/or other dogs predating hank. it's also possible he had other dogs either concurrent to hank or after him from s9 onward, either with sara or without her. from the sounds of things, by the time the events of csi: vegas s1 are taking place, he and sara are (for the moment) dogless.
from s1-s9, grissom's office is filled with specimens of preserved lizards, amphibians, and fish in jars. however, we don't know if he also has any other living vertebrates as pets. if so, it might explain why sara is able to spend so much unsupervised time in his office during his s7 sabbatical without anyone on the team really batting an eye (as she could just use the ol' "i'm pet-sitting for grissom while he's away. somebody's got to feed his salamanders!" excuse). but certainly nothing is ever mentioned specifically.
to the best of my knowledge, those are the only pets of his we ever know about.
sorry i can't give you a more exact answer!
thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.
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The Food of the Gods
I haven't watched a Bert I. Gordon movie in a while. This one is, like Village of the Giants, very loosely based on his favourite H. G. Wells book, and it stars Marjoe Gortner from Starcrash. Fun factoid: according to Wikipedia, Gortner's name is a portmanteau of 'Mary' and 'Joseph', which I guess seems like a good idea to people in the Bible Belt. I don't think this movie has a Rifftrack, but I'm afraid I gave up years ago on trying to keep track of those... as some of you have already noticed.
A football player named Morgan and a couple of his buddies head out for a weekend on Vancouver Island, and things quickly start to get weird. First, one of the guys is attacked and drained dry by mosquitoes the size of eagles, but I've been to Vancouver Island so that doesn't surprise me at all. What's more shocking is when Morgan goes looking for help and finds himself in a battle to the death with a chicken that would fit right in at Jurassic Park! It seems that some kind of disgusting white goo has been bubbling out of the ground and anything that eats it grows enormous. The local farmers think they're going to get rich feeding it to their livestock, but they've failed to take proper precautions to keep the flies out. And the wasps. And worst of all, the rats!
My first observation about this movie is that Gortner looks significantly less drugged than he did in Starcrash. I'm not sure what to do with this fact, but there it is.
The special effects in Food of the Gods are pretty standard Bert I. Gordon, with some see-through giant bugs, some roaring noises dubbed over footage of rats doing rat things, and some puppets. The superimposed insects are particularly bad even by Bert I. Gordon standards, and would have sucked in the 50's, never mind the 70's. The split-screen stuff and miniatures work is okay at best and at worst we have a cardboard house with windows painted on. The puppets, however, are actually not bad. The rat heads, and their piled-up corpses at the end, are surprisingly realistic for a movie like this, and the giant maggots in one scene are lifelike enough to turn the stomach quite effectively. Unfortunately, it looks like lots of rats were harmed or killed in the making of this movie, and if you are sensitive about animal welfare, or if you have pet rats, you probably don’t want to watch it.
The effects may be par but on other levels this is a rather atypical film for Bert I. Gordon, particularly in its point-of-view character. I have noticed before that a lot of BIG's scale-themed movies tell the story through the eyes of a woman whose role is to passively watch events that are far beyond her control. She may set the plot in motion and is often the love interest of an active male protagonist, but she ultimately does very little. Think of Susan in The Cyclops, Audrey in The Beginning of the End, or Lori in Necromancy.
Food of the Gods does not do this. It wants to use Morgan as both its hero and its audience identification character, which honestly is much more like how most people would try to tell a story. The thing that's kind of interesting, at least to somebody who's far too familiar with Gordon's filmography, is how this compares to his female-led films. In several ways, it really works less well.
To begin with, Morgan is somewhat deficient in the personality department, and what glimpses we do get of who he is and what he thinks about don’t seem relevant to what he does over the rest of the film. At the beginning of his trip to the island, Morgan and a couple of friends corner a deer. His buddies want to kill it, but Morgan protests that they've already 'won' and they have no reason to do that. Within the story this functions to split up the group – one guy goes to follow the deer anyway, and is attacked and killed by huge insects. But it also seems to establish Morgan as somebody who considers himself sympathetic to nature while unaware of his hypocrisy towards it (it's cruel to kill the deer, but okay to terrify and exhaust it?) and we expect that we will see him confront this over the course of the story. We do not. When animals become a threat to him, he has no problem killing them, and he never seems to stop and think about it.
Another attempt to give him some character is when Lorna, the bacteriologist working for the food company the islanders are hoping to sell their livestock to, tells him “you don't like women around while you do your thing, do you?” Morgan protests that this is not true: he doesn't like people in his way, regardless of their gender. This is ham-fisted, a telling rather than a showing, but it's trying to set him up as a lone wolf type, somebody who believes that if you want something done right you have to do it yourself. Yet it never comes up again. He is never forced to ask for help when he had insisted he didn't need it. And Lorna's apparent disgust with his individualism also evaporates, as she later tells him in the middle of a tense moment that his rugged manliness makes her want to fuck him right there. She's a little more polite than that, but Jesus.
Worse, we have very little idea of
why
Morgan feels like this is his responsibility. He escaped the island after the death of his friend, but goes back to deal with the animals. Why is that his job? I guess it might be a desire for revenge, or maybe a feeling that nobody else will do anything... if the latter, it might have been nice to see him try to report this to some authorities and not be believed. Then again, we saw in
Beginning of the End
that 'nobody believes in the monster' is a trope Gordon prefers to avoid.
We can now contrast Morgan with the leads in Gordon's other movies. Morgan has a great deal to do in this movie, but we don’t get much sense of what he’s trying to accomplish or why. Does he want to destroy the goo and its monsters, or just escape alive with the others? The women in BIG's older movies, on the other hand, while they often do very little, are always determined, goal-oriented individuals. Carole from The Amazing Colossal Man was annoying and weepy, but she was smart enough to know she was being lied to, and she was determined to find Glenn and help him in whatever way she could. Likewise Joyce in War of the Colossal Beast, who finds herself stymied at every turn but isn't afraid to complain about it, even to men who think they have every right to tell her to get lost. Carol in Earth vs the Spider wanted to hang on to the last gift her beloved father ever gave her. Audrey Aimes in Beginning of the End was doing her job as a reporter, following a story and bringing it to the world. We always knew not only what they were doing, but why.
I'm not sure why the difference between them and Morgan. Bert I. Gordon was clearly capable of writing people with reasons for the things they do, even when the audience knows those reasons are less than rational. There are even examples in Food of the Gods. We have Mrs. Skinner, who has a creeping feeling that this has all gone terribly wrong, but trusts her husband's judgment and takes refuge in her faith; and Lorna, who is clinging to her self-respect in the face of an asshole boss. All these more successful characters seem to have only one other thing in common and that's that they are all women. I feel like it would take somebody with more background in psychology than I to really get into the meat of this. Freud would probably have loved it.
There's one other place where Food of the Gods seems like it's going to go somewhere, and that's with the nature of the mysterious white goo itself. An opening voiceover by Morgan suggests that it's produced by the Earth as a form of revenge on humanity, and the two farmers, Mr and Mrs Skinner, believe it's a gift from God to make their farm prosperous. Later in the movie, however, we see a white rat with red eyes among the throngs – an albino. The first association anyone has with white rats is, of course, laboratory animals... was this stuff created by an Evil Corporation?
Apparently not, since there's no further exploration of this. We don't find out where the white rat came from, it's just there, evidently a random mutation. What gets really weird is when a character later points to it and says, “looks like the white one's the leader!” What? Since when do rats have leaders? I think we're meant to assume that the rats are a little more intelligent and organized than their smaller brethren, since they're able to shut down an electrified fence by knocking a tree onto a generator (although we don't see this, so it could have been an accident), but the white one in no way seems to be directing them. At the end there's a brief 'climactic battle' between Morgan and this animal, as he clubs it to death with the butt of a rifle, but it’s not nearly formidable enough to justify the special attention paid to it.
I really am going to write a book on Bert I. Gordon's movies someday. My father has asked me why, if I want to over-analyze movies, I don't do good movies, or at least average ones. My reply is that there are plenty of people who devote their lives to the work of Kubrick or Kurosawa. There’s even a guy on YouTube who has spent hundreds of hours examining the lore of the aforementioned Jurassic Park franchise. But nobody sits and thinks about the films of Bert I. Gordon... except me.
#mst3k#reviews#episodes that never were#the food of the gods#70s#tw: animal cruelty#mister big#there are horses in this movie
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Rewatching Malleus Maleficarum
Welcome to "The Nice and Accurate Protests of Dean Winchester, Witchfinder General: A Supernatural Rewatch Blog" with Lor and Mace!
Up today, s3e9: Malleus Maleficarum
The boys stumble onto a coven of suburban housewife witches, who are using their power to become president of the PTA or some ridiculous nonsense. Dean's not happy with the job because he hates witches because they're messy, and to be honest he's not all wrong - there some seriously gross stuff going on, including teeth falling out and maggots in hamburgers. So yeah, ew. It turns out, though, that one of the witches isn't a witch at all, but a demon. Fake Wifey Witch Demon slams Sam and Dean up against a wall while revealing Ruby's interesting past. Then Ruby does some revealing of her own, telling Dean that all demons are humans who've had the humanity tortured out of them in hell and that's what he has to look forward to once he's been hellhound dragged down there. Dean's...not happy about this either, but isn't quite ready to open up about it to Sammy. Which is, of course, SHOCKING.
Below is a log of our real-time reactions as we watched. Remember that there may be spoilers for any part of SPN’s 15-season run here. Note also that the nature of our conversation is adult and thus it may contain adult language and themes.
[and we begin:]
Mace:
Oooh, the witches one!
Lor:
YES
Mace:
Dean won’t be happy
Lor:
he will not
Lor:
is this the one where he almost walks into a dead rabbit?
Mace:
she… keeps her toothbrush in the original box?
Mace:
I think so?
Lor:
they are so rich they use a new one every time
Mace:
Ooof, too soon for me
Lor:
AAAAAUUUGGGH TEETH
AGAIN
Mace:
HAHAHAHA
Lor:
two eps in a row!
Lor:
holds you
Mace:
So rude.
Mace:
leans in
Mace:
EWEWEWEW
Lor:
SO GROSS
Mace:
but would that really kill her?
Lor:
i wouldn't think so?
Mace:
stupid witches
Lor:
mmmm Dean looking PRETTY
Mace:
YAS
Mace:
SO IS SAMMY
Lor:
"I dunno. I was under his sink"
Mace:
“awww gross"
Mace:
poor Dean
Lor:
YES
Lor:
awww, rain on their shoulders
Mace:
YES
Lor:
"I hate witches"
Lor:
"it's downright unsanitary" pets him
Lor:
he likes things CLEAN
Mace:
“some craggy old Blair bitch in the woods"
Mace:
HE DOES
Lor:
LOL
Lor:
the first rule of book club...
Mace:
HAHAHAHA
Lor:
oh GROSS
Mace:
oh GROSS
Mace:
SNORK
Lor:
LOLOLOL
Lor:
oh man I forgot just HOW MUCH gross there is in this ep
Mace:
YEP
Mace:
good thing she got all dolled up in her lingerie for this.
Mace:
not creepy at all, lady
Lor:
right?
Lor:
so easy to get worm guts out of silk
Lor:
it's just practical, really
Mace:
HAHAHA
Mace:
EEEEEWWWWW
Lor:
EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW
Lor:
"you'd be a doornail right now" HIS IDIOLECT
Mace:
YEP
Mace:
He watched the muppets version every year
Lor:
YES
Lor:
"that's a curveball"
Mace:
HA
Mace:
I love the shot through the bottom of the table
Lor:
YES
Lor:
HAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA DEAN
Mace:
FREAKIN WITCHES
Lor:
YAAAS
Mace:
“poor little guy"
Mace:
omg DEAN
Lor:
"why's the rabbit always gotta get screwed in the deal? poor little guy"
Lor:
YES
Lor:
holds him
Mace:
witch on witch violence
Lor:
the FLIP PHONES. the way they SHUT THEM
Mace:
YEP
Mace:
yeah, Ron, take your misogyny elsewhere
Lor:
right?
Lor:
"people don't just spit out their teeth all of a sudden" "uh-mm"
Mace:
these ladies are CREEPY
Lor:
RIGHT?
Lor:
I was gonna say, "you're a little dicky, Ron, but maybe run? like, don't come back here"
Mace:
SNORK
Lor:
"getting these herbs to grow out of season like this" SAMMY
Lor:
he's so SMART
Mace:
Bachman and Turner I LOVE IT
Mace:
YES HE IS
Lor:
YES
Mace:
he would SO have an herb garden at the bunker
Lor:
YES
Lor:
"but she was an Episcopalian" hahahahaha
Mace:
SNORK
Lor:
"would you like me to spell it for you?" "i'll get by, thanks"
Mace:
why would she say her name like that? I mean, just SAY you’re a witch and get it over with
Lor:
LOOK, LADY. don't be a jerk to Dean
Lor:
LOL
Lor:
it's like she thinks it should mean something to him
Mace:
yeah
Mace:
but it just comes off awkward
Lor:
yeah
Lor:
and Dean recognizes all those plants
Lor:
THEY ARE SO SMART
Mace:
they are
Lor:
hahahahaha Sammy saying her name the way she did
Mace:
YAS
Mace:
such snark
Lor:
"stopped like STOPPED?"
Mace:
this whole moral code switching between the two of them is so interesting
Lor:
his gun don't jam and HIS BABY DON'T STALL
Mace:
and also sort of confusing
Lor:
right?
Mace:
omg his “HAHAHAHA right."
Lor:
yeah
Lor:
YES
Lor:
"you mean besides you?"
Mace:
“put a leash on your brother”
Mace:
ooooo
Lor:
"put a leash on your brother Sam if you want to keep him"
Lor:
YES
Lor:
and Dean's FACE
Mace:
Dean, slow your roll on the bitch and skank language pls
Lor:
seriously
Lor:
we need to have a little talk with him
Mace:
we do
Lor:
mmmm the little snaps on Sam's shirt
Mace:
YAS
Lor:
Dean washes his face!
Mace:
YES
Mace:
those jeans really show off Dean’s adorable bowed legs
Lor:
Dean's all worried about Sam wanting to kill people
Lor:
YAAAAS
Mace:
YEP
Mace:
poor Dean has a tummy ache
Lor:
oooof Sammy
Lor:
he DOES
Mace:
“into you” OOOOF
Lor:
RIGHT?!
Mace:
and the tears in Sammy’s eyes
Lor:
except Dean is a marshmallow on the inside
Mace:
with knives, apparently
Lor:
I like it a little too much when he's hurting
Lor:
HAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH OMG
Mace:
YEP
Mace:
quit. calling. her. bitch. Dean.
Mace:
HAHAHAHA OMG RUBY
Lor:
LOLOL YAS
Mace:
I don’t like that I’m pre-quoting her
Lor:
it's like the only time she gets any points
Lor:
LOLOLOLOL
Mace:
HAHAHAHA
Mace:
“you’re the short bus”
Lor:
"you're the shortbus" omg Dean
Mace:
HAHAHAHAHA
Mace:
“nice dick work"
Mace:
HAHAHAHA
Lor:
"nice dick work, Magnum" LOLOLOL
Mace:
the women’s synchronized gasp
Lor:
YES
Lor:
yeah RENEE
Mace:
HAHAHA
Lor:
"just who did you think you were praying to?" like RIGHT? it's working so what did they think was happening?
Mace:
RIGHT?! Dummies.
Lor:
"you're not our messiah. we don't believe in you"
Mace:
I BELIEVE IN YOU SAMMY
Lor:
ME TOO SAMMY
Lor:
I mean, I can see him, he's right there
Mace:
SNORK
Lor:
way to save the day, Dean, baby
Mace:
HAHAHAHA
Lor:
Dean mouthing "told you so" haaaaahahahahaha
Mace:
right? Now’s not really the time, Dean
Lor:
right?
Lor:
but what if they die an it was his only chaaaance?
Mace:
HA! true
Lor:
Abbot and Costello hahahaha
Lor:
OMG I NEED to see Sam and Dean do who's on first
Mace:
snork
Mace:
YES
Mace:
hm, I think it would be better with Dean and Cas
Lor:
OMG YES
Lor:
DANG Dean, once woulda done, hon
Mace:
oh Dean, once was prolly enough
Mace:
HAHAHA OMG
Lor:
HAAAAHAHAHAHA
Mace:
and now Sam’s washing his face!
Lor:
yep
Lor:
ooooof Dean
Mace:
yeah
Lor:
oooof he's trying to joke
Mace:
yeah
Lor:
omg his little nod when she says there's no way to save him
Mace:
yeah
Lor:
he really DOESN'T think he deserves to be saved
Mace:
yeah
Mace:
oooof
Lor:
right?
Lor:
this must have been WILD to watch live
Mace:
YES
#watchingspnagain#watchingspnagain 3x09#spn#supernatural#spn meta#spn spoilers#spn 3x09#watchingspnagain boy king of hell#watchingspnagain dean and cleanliness#watchingspnagain dean washes his face#watchingspn again treatment of female characters#watchingspnagain witches
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literal average 6:00 night for us at an er clinic
*pick up the phone* thank you for calling ______ how can i help you? oh question about medication, of course, can i place you on a brief hold while i handle a client in front of me? thank you"
hi welcome to ____ do we have an emergency?
i think so, he's having an allergic reaction *dogs eyes are swollen shut and red* *tail is going 10000 miles a minute tho*
yeah i think he might be too, let's get him in back here's the e-auth form, could you fill out this and authorize this treatment thank you (the good boy ate ants and they bit him it turned out)
come back up front oh hi how can i help you oh your dog has a skin infection - oh wait, did you call about maggots earlier... yeah, let's get him in back okay thanks. (that dog was just ... a story and a half and i dont even want to know what was going on)
hi how can i help you oh ... you were here yesterday and your pet is basically dying and you decided to do outpatient care also you had zero dollars then and zero today and now they are declining yes i talked to you earlier and told you to come in and see if maybe you could find someone to help with finances but nobody can okay well let's just pass this off to someone with authority on payment things cos i do not have that and i am running back up front now
PHONE. "Hi thank you for holding are you still there? Hello? Hello? Hello? ... okay. *hanging up phone time regroup*
two seconds later, phone calls back * Hi thank you for calling ____ can I help you - yes, sorry i think we dropped the call maybe? Yes, you had a question about your dog- OH PLEASE HOLD I AM SO SORRY."
Phone on hold get information from sobbing girl that her cat ate a poisonous berry she has a case number for THANK YOU BLESS YOUR HEART I MEAN THAT get cat in back get back on phone take very confusing message from client about two medications... that she didn't know name of. Including a painkiller. Her pet is on two different painkillers. MADE SURE TO GET CALL BACK NUMBER FOR POOR PHARMACY TECH.
hang up and take angry message from client in front of me about wait times as we bump up from 4 to 6 to 6 to 8 hour wait for a doctor if stable and just pray for shift change to come. Dog poops on the floor in three places on the way out.
Not included: angry about surgery discharge client and angry about bandage/splint change client. Also the ones I'm too tired to remember.
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Stephanie Gets Juiced.
Betelgeuse (Beetlejuice) FTM TG
William was a natural practical joker and comedian, always pulling tricks and pranks on his older sibling Stephanie…he very much couldn’t stand how uptight Stephanie was and wished she could just chill and learn to have fun every once in a while, but Stephanie hated him for trying to get her to do such things, she hated his pranks, she hated his jokes, she never found his jokes to be funny in the slightest and she had a feeling that he was out to harm her.
Stephanie and William lived with their parents Timothy and Helena, and they were often visited by their relatives Edgar, Vincent, Peter, Edward, Kim, and Ichabod. Timothy and Helena were an eccentric couple that had all sorts of weird knick-knacks in their house, any movie prop that was from a movie they watched they owned a copy of and almost all over the house. One prop that Timothy was especially proud of was the sandworm from the movie ‘Beetlejuice’ which he kept near his night-stand and treated it like it was a family pet.
One night Stephanie got the fright of her life when William tricked her into picking up a magazine, basically William swapped out the contents of her usual fashion magazine with that of a gory Tales From The Crypt style comic and she didn’t like blood or gore, horror anything terrified her, she was a bit of a wuss like that. She screamed and shouted…’Mom! William swapped out my usual magazines for gory horror comics.’ ‘Oh you know he’s just being mischievous.’ ‘Mischievous? Mischievous? He put live maggots in my cereal yesterday morning, he put on undead makeup and pretended he was Donovan from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade to scare me into thinking that’s what i’ll look like when i’m old, he stole some of dad’s hair clippings and stuck them on my hands and told me I was turning into a werewolf, need I go on?’
‘Your brother just likes to play pranks.’ ‘He has gone too far this time.’ William laughed as he saw his sister having a hissy fit…’You just need to chill, sis. Besides, it’s just good fun, you’re so easy to fool, such an easy patsy for my pranks.’ ‘One of these days William you are going to end up behind bars if you don’t stop being naughty.’ ‘Me? Behind bars? For doing pranks? Hardly, it’s not illegal to pull pranks and have fun. You’re such a Delia, you know that, right?’ ‘Mom, William is comparing me to Delia Deitz again!’
Stephanie hated being compared to Delia, she hated the fact she was compared to her despite the fact she was actually quite similar to her. ‘But it’s true, you totally are like her. You even dress like her and you have your own Otho.’ ‘If you are talking about Richard, he’s not my Otho.’ ‘Oh yes, he is, he is totally the Otho to your Delia.’
Her lackey/best friend who always followed her and also helped her with her ‘projects’, was named Richard, Richard was a man who very much resembled Otho himself, and had a similar fashion sense, he often acted like he was smarter than everyone else but he knew that he wasn’t. ‘I swear this family is so weird sometimes.’ ‘Weird? Whatever do you mean?’ ‘Well all the movie props for one thing, and dad treats a sandworm prop like it’s a pet. And well..I don’t think me and William are related.’ ‘How?’ ‘I feel like William belongs to another family and not this one.’
William couldn’t resist thinking of another brilliant prank to pull, as he saw there was a model city that Timothy had built and there was a model graveyard of sorts with a tombstone with the name ‘Betelgeuse’ on it and he turned to Stephanie and said…’Hey Steph, I dare you to read the name on this tombstone.’ ‘Oh no I am not falling for another one of your jokes.’ ‘It’s no joke, go on, give it a go.’ ‘Oh alright, but only if you promise to not pull any more pranks.’
“I promise.”
‘Very well then..Betelgeuse.’ ‘Say it again.’ ‘Betelgeuse.’ ‘Good, one more time please.’ ‘Betelgeuse!’ Stephanie let out a piercing scream as a spirit emerged from the model and began to float around her, teasing her, mocking her. ‘Hahaha! It’s showtime! Hello there, what do we have here?’ The spirit was definitely Betelgeuse himself, and he took delight in making fun of Stephanie and her outfits, which annoyed her, she lunged at him and attempted to attack him only for the ghost with the most to smirk at her.
“Oooh, this is going to be fun.”
‘I see you have met my sister.’ ‘That’s your sister?’ ‘Unfortunately, yes.’ The wisecracking specter laughed as he examined her, making wisecracks and jokes that Stephanie definitely did not find funny in the slightest. ‘The last time I saw an outfit with that much feathers on it I was in Las Vegas!’
Stephanie couldn’t take being made fun of by him and she attempted to get rid of him by trying to say his name again, only for him to make her go mute with his supernatural powers. ‘I gotta be honest here, I agree with your brother, you definitely have no chill.’ He quipped, as Stephanie’s body temperature began to freeze up and her skin slowly turned white and she found herself turning into a living snow-woman.
Betelgeuse couldn’t help but laugh, this was fun for him and he definitely loved Wlliam, a man after his own heart. He thought of something that would be even more fun, as he took on a transparent form and then dove into Stephanie’s mouth, and entered her body, possessing her in the process.
Her stomach gurgled and she felt like she was going to be sick as her skin slowly became paler, looking almost ghostly white as her hands enlarged, her nails were turning a black color and also her skin was definitely looking a bit dirtier as her chest and torso bulked up a bit as di her stomach, her breasts retracted into her chest and she let out a loud terrified scream. In addition to this her hips retracted while her feet enlarged.
Her outfit was also slowly changing, changing to look like the ghost with the most’s iconic suit and her privates altered to become more masculine while she found herself growing a little bit, while her neckline contorted and her brown hair slowly turned a dirty blondish color and a bit of it even fell out at the top while it became more wild-looking in general, her eyebrows thickened as dark circles formed around her eyes, making it look like she was either really tired or was going through a raccoon lookalike phase.
Her features slowly altered, as her teeth became dirtier looking while stubble grew on her face, her facial features slowly morphing into his and her voice followed suit, changing to sound exactly like the ghost with the most himself, making her sound like Michael Keaton, she couldn’t believe it…she had been possessed and taken over by Betelgeuse. ‘You are in so much trouble for this.’ ‘I don’t think so, sis.’ ‘What?’ ‘I think mom and dad are going to think this is hilarious, I mean you look and sound like my favorite Tim Burton character.’
Stephanie grumbled, not liking the idea of being Betelgeuse, but she eventually warmed up to i, realizing that it wasn’t so bad being him and that she could use her newfound powers to finally relax and have fun. She realized that maybe it was her who was the weird one the entire time and that she was born to be weird, and that is when she decided to make a promise.
She promised to herself that from then on, she wouldn’t be so uptight and promised to be a bit perkier and happier, she definitely felt much better about being in such a weird family because she had finally fit in now.
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Yan!TF2 × reader headcannons (SFW and NSFW)
// obsessive tendancies, mentions of violence, blood, sexual themes, noncon
[SFW]
Let's start with the defense classes
Defense:
Demoman
Deffo didn't admit that he loved you
Tbh he probably blamed it on his drunkenness
But dude you're always drunk
I mean seriously if he sobers up he'll genuinely die so like-
He would usually drink with you or just around you if you don't drink
He's generally a fun chill guy to be with
He would watch you from a distance at times, especially during battle you might distract the cyclops
He's okay with you asking questions
One time he broke his eyepatch and needed a new one
You gave him a nice black eyepatch with the demoman emblem on it
He gets all red whenever you say his full name, because he knows you remembered it
He is generally against kidnapping, I mean especially since he lives with his ma he'd rather not
And because he's a gentleman
If you ever reciprocate his feelings he'll make sure to treat you right
He is a messy person but for you? He'll clean
Probably would get carried away and make home made bombs with all the cleaning supplies 🤦♂️
Takes you to meet his mom
"ooo Tavish, yer gonna get me some grand kiddos are ya?"
That made you both blush like crazy
Soft cheek kisses
Probably made a special bomb and named it after you
"this one's for you, luv!" *Proceeds to set off all stickybombs which blows up the entire enemy team*
Blew up the last guy who looked at you funny
Hell, even worse when they make a sexual remark to you scout probably did it
Likes to give you your space but when he's paranoid he follows you to wherever or watched you from a distance
Heavy
Two words: big boy
Hugs are 10000000000/10
Sometimes it fewls suffocating but man it's like hugging a cloud
Soft forehead kisses
Russian pet names
He sometimes lets you touch Sasha, that's how he knows he loves you because he doesn't even let medic, his best friend, touch her
Probably named a gun after you or one of the pet names he calls you
You definitely met his family and they loved you
Zana especially
Doesn't get jealous easily but will not hesitate to unload 12 pounds of bullets into someone who even LOOKS at you the wrong way
Lord have mercy on the ones who dare flirt with you, rest in pieces scout
Doesn't really follow you anywhere (you're a bit too fast for him) but he does watch you and check up on you
He preforms okay on the battlefield but when you're around, he'll show off
Will cook for you, mainly russian dishes
He's very against kidnapping and would rather not do it
Doesn't shut up about you when he's around medic
Engineer
F l u f f y
Very softspoken in general but he gets all flustered when you talk to him
Will check up on you occasionally
"Darlin'" "Honey bunny" things like that y'know
Huge smile when you're around
Will cook for you most definitely, knows what you like
Makes little robots for you
Likes seeing you use his dispenser
Doesn't get jealous easily either but will try and take you away from someone who wants your attention
Likes just having you in his presence, doesn't need to talk to be happy with you around
Very very against kidnapping like all other defense classes, wouldn't do it unless if he truly felt the need to, last resort kind of thing
The last guy who flirted with you had a sentry gun shoved up his ass
Doesn't really follow you anywhere
Offense:
Scout
Nothing short of a horomonal teenager
I mean he's 21 but
He gets so giddy around you, very loud, tries to show off
He loves you very much
"oh yeah? Well I once absolutely smashed a guy into peices, he was still screaming when he was dead!"
He brags about brutal things but hey you love it since you're also brutal
Flexes his non-existent muscles around you
Would talk about his mom to you all day
Definitely got a tattoo of your face and name somewhere on his body, most likely his bicep
Your name is probably misspelled too but you never say anything about it because he can't read so it's fine
He hasn't really thought about kidnapping in all honesty, again, a last resort kinda thing if he can't get you to love him
He will make a damn SCENE if anyone flirts with you
"you think that's funny, chucklenuts? I eat guys like you for breakfast lunch AND dinner!" "I'll blow yer freakin head off if ya talk to y/n like that again!" Would definitely drag you away
God help anyone that makes you uncomfortable, he'll fuck them up, if that person is medic I mean he'll try to but we all know how fucking scary medic is
Follows you at times
Pyro
"Mphmphmpph"
Seems more lovey around you
Definitely gave you a hand full of the enemy's bloody bones thinking it was a bouquet of flowers
Absolute baby
Just so precious, scary but precious
Hugs for days
Good luck trying to get their ass off of you when you're on cease-fire
Very warm though, they smell like smoke with a bit of blood
Likes petting you
Isn't against the idea of kidnap because they don't realize what they're actually doing, they think they're just taking you to a magical place
Snuggles
When someone flirts with you their whole world changes
Gets angry and starts yelling at them
"MPHMPHMOHMPHHH! MPHMPHNHUMAHUMA!" - Pyro 2021
Will not let you get a checkup alone, he trusts medic but not with you
Very sweet tho, he'll turn around when you need to strip down
Will follow you almost EVERYWHERE and if they can, while holding your hand
Soldier
Yells at you a little less than the others
At first doesn't realize how he feels but then realizes that he loves you
Is pretty protective over you
Rants about America all day to you
Probably got you an american flag to wear
Doesn't really take off his helmet but he likes seeing you in it, makes him proud
If you ever live with him you'll find out that he owns like 20 racoons
"YOU ARE CUTER THAN A RACOON" "YOU WILL BE SAFE ON THE BATTLEFIELD, DO YOU HEAR ME MAGGOT?"
He loudly wakes everyone up in the morning but tries to avoid waking you up
Loves you as much as he loves America
Will show off on the battlefield for you
Isn't against kidnapping you, he probably did it early on if you showed immediately that you didn't reciprocate his feelings
Will blow any guy that hits on you to absolute bits
"MAGGOT DO YOU HEAR ME? YOU WILL LEAVE THE LADY/MAN ALONE THIS INSTANT!"
Probably put you on his back and rocket jumped just to show you what it felt like
Follows you around a lot, it's really obvious because he wears a bucket over his head and crashes into things, when you look back he'll stand behind a lamp post or somewhere really obvious
Support
Ah yes, everyones favorite class including mine
Sniper
Very quiet
Takes secret glances at you
Pays more attention to you than the others
S h y
Asks how you are, how you slept, etc
Doesn't really need to be holding you, tbh he's against PDA
But he likes being in your presence
Just sit down next to him and he'll be fine
When he's on the battlefield, he'll look for you and make sure you're safe
God forbid anyone try to hurt you, he'll make them suffer
Talks about Australia to you and accidentally admitted that he wanted to take you there
Doesn't like the idea of kidnapping but he isn't totally against it, I can see him doing it
He smuggled you all the damn way to Australia
He'll nonchalantly show off to you on the battlefield, he'll let you get cornered and come in to save the day
"love" is a word he uses a lot with you
Will grumble to himself if he sees someone flirting with you
If it's a random person, well, that'll be the last time you ever see them
Has talked about you to his parents
Kind of follows you? I mean he sits atop a high placeand watches you through his scope whenever you're going somewhere
Spy
SEDUCTIVE ASF
He knows what he's doing
Will kiss your hand a lot
Likes to flirt with you and see you blush
"honhonhon"
Sleazy french fucker
Watched you from afar at first then approached you a little later
Isn't against the idea of kidnapping, pro kidnapping, definitely did it not only to have you to himself but for some sort of sexual satisfaction
Just very uh... Lewd? Can't find the right word
He treats you very respectfully though
If he hears anyone else flirting with you he'll be fuming but won't show it
"Oh please, like you could EVER satisfy y/n's desires"
That person mysteriously disappeared that night
Very cocky bastard
Definetly follows you home, not only that but he watches you through your window
And stalks you
He knows everything about you
Would get you either by knocking you unconscious or by blackmailing you
Medic
B a s t a r d
Gets LOUD when you're around
And giddy
Very touchy, always has a reason to put his hands on you
Talks a lot with you around, I mean he already talks a lot but now he won't shut up
Keeps his office nice and clean for you
He restocks on everything so when you come around you can take a loot at all his medicines
Big smile :D
Like spy he is not at all against kidnapping you
Makes sure you're comfortable during checkups
Will make you wait to be seen last just so he can take his time touching your body
"it's all part of the procedure".mp3
Compliments you in weird ways, ex: "your skin is so smooth and lovely, it's the perfect texture to make leather out of" "you have an amazing colon"
Look he's just trying his best here he has a screw loose
You're the only member who he's careful with really
Sometimes allows you to get hurt or has you get hurt by something just so you can see him
Always follows you wherever
Knows everything about you
If someone is flirting with you, he'll get quiet at first and use a low tone to speak to them
"you have guts talking to y/n like that"
They were never seen again
With kidnapping, he won't hesitate to use blackmail against you, or will just use anesthesia
Bonus: Pauling
Pauling
This lady values her work over her life, but to her you're so much more important
Will call you a lot on the battlefield to check in on you
Won't give you extremely hard missons to do because she doesn't want you to get hurt
"Hey (class), Pauling here. I need you... No not like that I just- I mean- for a mission yeah a mission"
Gets all flustered when you're around
Will take her only day off to spend time with you, what a sweetheart
Keeps multiple tabs on you
Follows you around
Doesn't really have time for kidnapping
But if it comes to that, she'll make something up so she has a reason to kidnap you
If anyone else is flirting with you she won't show that she's annoyed
She'll make something up as an excuse to execute them
[NSFW]
Defense
Demo
Has definitely thought of what you'd look like while naked
B l u s h
Has used a mental image of you to get off before
Probably has an actual photo of you
When he drinks a little more than usual, he'll accidentally brush his hand against your ass or get touchy with you
Will not force himself on you, he's 100% against that
If you decide to have sex with him, praise is what you're gonna get
"you're as beautiful as a shot of whiskey in the sunrise"
Very gentle with his hands
Heavy
Not the type to masturbate
Unless if he gets THAT worked up
Again, against forcing himself on you
But if you want it no doubt you will top
He's also gentle with you
And loving
Praise is all you're gonna get
Sometimes russian sometimes broken english
Either way he will worship your body
Engi
Again, a more modest guy, doesn't really touch himself
Might just use a robot to pleasure himself when thinking about you
Probably has a photo of you and him around his workshop
Never forces himself on you
He's sweet and gentle when you do want it though
Sometimes gets help from his robot friends
Offense
Scout
Gets off on thinking about you
Won't force himself on you though
Sexual remarks × 100
Calls you handsome/beautiful in bed
I wouldn't say he's the best in bed but hey he's good I guess
Cuddles after sex most likely
Probablh threw out all his sexual magazines because they just didn't do the trick anymore
Sometimes when he runs past you, your shirt/skirt gets lifted up by a gust of wind and he can't help but look ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)
Since I hit the text limit, I'll be making a part 2, stay tuned
#tf2 x reader#medic x reader#engineer x reader#spy x reader#yandere hcs#yandere#scout x reader#sniper x reader#heavy x reader#demoman x reader#pyro x reader#soldier x reader#pauling x reader#yandere tf2
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BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU’RE NOT PREPARED TO TRY
if you’re following my blog or if you read my fanfiction, you may have seen me talking in tags or comments about how the radiance hollowknight was a pacifist. “feral, wtf?” you may have thought. “she’s the freaking final boss and tries really, really hard to kill you and all her attacks do 2 entire masks damage. where on earth do you get pacifism out of that???”
to you specifically i say, that’s an understandable reaction! the short version of how i got here was that i started thinking about the story implications of radi not inflicting contact damage and took a deep dive into game mechanics and lore. when i came up for air i had made myself Very Sad.
if this intrigues you and you would like to know more, come along with me, i am happy to point out the things i noticed and share the Big Sad around.
this essay is also available on dreamwidth for accessibility purposes, since my layout’s text may be too small for folks on pc with high-res screens.
CONTENT WARNING: This essay discusses pseudo-zombie plagues and associated body horror, colonialism and genocide, horrible things that happened in real life Australian history... you know, the usual topics that come up when I’m talking about Hollow Knight.
ADDITIONAL NOTICE: TPK fans of the “TPK meant well/was working for the greater good”/“TPK and Radi are equally bad”/“TPK is bad but Radi is worse” variety please give this one a pass, it ain’t for you.
finally if youre from a christian cultural upbringing (whether currently practicing, agnostic/secular, or atheist now), understand that some of what i’m discussing here may challenge you. if thinking thru the implications of this particular part of hollow knight worldbuilding/lore is distressing for you, PLEASE only approach this essay when youre in a safe mindset & open to listening, and ask the help of a therapist or anti-racism teacher/mentor to help you process your thoughts & feelings. just like keep in mind that youre listening to an ethnoreligiously marginalized person and please be respectful here or wherever else youre discussing this dang essay
BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU’RE NOT PREPARED TO TRY: The Radiance Doesn’t Deal Contact Damage And That’s Kind Of Fucked Up And Sad
The vast majority of hostile creatures in Hollow Knight deal contact damage: This is to say, if the Wandering Knight (who I’ll probably spend most of this essay calling by their affectionate fan name Ghost) touches a hostile creature, this harms them.
There are exceptions to this rule. The most notable and most oft-memed example is the game’s literal actual true final boss, the Radiance. Not only will Ghost not be harmed by running into any part of her body, but during her stagger animation, where she drops to the boss arena floor on her front with her whole body splayed out, Ghost still isn’t harmed if she lands on top of them! What’s more, this holds true for her full-power form Absolute Radiance, the secret final boss of the Godmaster quest/endings.
A lot of people find this amusing, because it’s a little absurd that a game’s final boss is an exception to such a consistent element of gameplay! Hence all the “haha moth too soft and fluffy for contact damage” jokes. It is objective facts that Radi is very soft and very fluffy, so it’s very easy to understand why people don’t overthink this too much.
Thinking about things I like in gross detail is unfortunately my hobby. When it comes to Hollow Knight this usually leads to me making myself really sad. I’d like to share the fruits of my theorizing with the class, so other people can be sad with me.
Now, from a game design perspective I can think of a lot of reasons why Team Cherry chose for Radiance not to inflict contact damage. Her hitbox only covers the central part of her body. Her limbs are large, so because of the way she floats, if she did contact damage she would be protected from nail strikes from below and to either side. This would give a player who prefers nail combat a punishingly small margin through which they could inflict damage without also taking a hit, potentially forcing them to adapt to a new and unfamiliar play style at the very end of the game. That’s not fun for anybody and tends to make players feel very frustrated.
In addition to this, Radiance’s attacks are all bullet hell-style spells. All of them except the floor hazards inflict two masks of damage, meaning if you want to stay alive and identify points where it’s possible to heal, you need to learn the spell patterns and dodge a lot. Radi is a large boss. If running into her hurt you this would make the bullet hell elements of her fight extra punishing.
So, I think the purely game mechanics reason for Moth Too Soft And Fluffy is in interest of keeping her boss fight fair, and helping players feel like they have a chance of actually defeating her.
Part of why we all love Hollow Knight, though, is that there’s not much in the game that only exists for purely mechanical reasons. There’s always some form of story or lore integration.
So what on earth is the story reason behind why Radiance doesn’t deal contact damage?
OTHER ENEMIES THAT DON’T DEAL CONTACT DAMAGE
Radi isn’t the only enemy (here defined as fightable/killable creature) in Hollow Knight who doesn't inflict contact damage, so let’s take a look at her fellow exceptions to the rule to see what we can learn.
Broadly speaking there are two categories of Enemies That Don’t Deal Contact Damage. The first is enemies or bosses who used to be hostile, but have become friendly to the player. For instance, when characters like Ogrim and Hornet are not being fought in boss battles, touching them won’t cause damage to Ghost. These story characters who Ghost has more or less reconciled with can’t be damaged by the player out of combat either.
In terms of generic enemies who used to be hostile but have become friendly to the player, we have the mantises of the Fungal Wastes and the Siblings/Ghost’s Shade. We learn from the game’s lore that the mantises Did Not Like The Pale King and were hostile to Hallownest, but that they established a ceasefire conditional on their keeping the people of Deepnest (who were also hostile to Hallownest) from leaving through the area’s main entrance/exit in the Fungal Wastes - essentially the two native kingdoms were pitted against one another by the Pale King.
Now, just because there was a ceasefire, that doesn’t mean the mantises take kindly to Hallownest bugs brazenly trespassing into their dang house; they will get in your face and try to kill you unless you have permission to be there. But once you’ve defeated the Mantis Lords in combat and proven yourself worthy of the mantises’ respect, they’ll let you pass through their turf unmolested. They are no longer actively hostile and don't deal contact damage.
(You're still able to attack them, though - maybe because you’d be locked out of receiving the Hunter’s Mark if you complete the Respect quest/achievement before you’ve successfully killed enough mantises? - and if you attack them, or if your pet charm familiars attack them, any mantises you aggroed will fight back and deal contact damage again.)
The Siblings, as well as Ghost’s Shade, are initially indiscriminately hostile. Our window into Shade psychology is limited, but we know that the Shade died violently and the Siblings probably did too; they may be lashing out. They’re also Void creatures, and Ghost looks a lot like the Pale King, whom we can guess from context clues pissed the Void off significantly by using it as his personal play-doh to make tools and toys with and also using its house as his personal garbage dump for baby corpses.
However, once Ghost recalls their past and breaks the mask of the Kingsoul charm to reveal the Void Heart at its core, the Void recognizes them as a part of it, and Ghost becomes able to direct/lead the Void to some extent. As an extension of this, the Siblings and Ghost’s shade become docile and can now be killed by any weapon in one hit instead of just the Dream Nail (which is made of Radiance’s Light and is the Void’s natural weakness). They don’t deal contact damage anymore either.
That’s it for “enemies that inflict contact damage at one point, but stop inflicting it after becoming friendly or neutral to Ghost”.
The generic enemies which don't inflict contact damage include shrumelings, maggots, maskflies, and lightseeds/lifeseeds. These enemies are incapable of inflicting any damage on Ghost whatsoever, because by themselves they are completely helpless entities with no natural defenses.
Shrumelings are infant members of the mushroom clan who are usually protected by adult fungi like shrumal warriors and ogres. Lightseeds and lifeseeds are harmless single-celled organisms. Maskflies are similarly harmless. Maggots, we glean from the Hunter’s Journal and dialogue from False Knight/Failed Champion, are the bottom rung of Hallownest’s society because they are weak and helpless, and are forced into menial and slave labor by other Hallownest bugs because they cannot defend themselves. The maggots’ plight is the whole reason why False Knight/Failed Champion stole Hegemol's armor in the first place, as he wanted to protect his people.
All of these enemies flee when Ghost approaches them. (Some maskfly groups’ flight triggers are set to specific areas on a map and won’t flee if you can avoid stepping on/passing through those areas, but this is clearly due to a programming oversight because their whole Thing is running away.)
But, there’s something interesting to be observed in the case of lightseeds and maggots: They can fight back against and harm Ghost if they use tools. The little flock of lightseeds you chase around the Ancient Basin eventually get sick of Ghost’s shit and take over Broken Vessel/Lost Kin’s corpse, which they puppet around to try to murder you. By doing so they gain access to Broken Vessel/Lost Kin’s considerable combat prowess and become very dangerous, contact damage included in the bargain. (The lightseeds’ doing this seems to evoke the vessel’s spirit, since they reach for Ghost when defeated. That’s not a gesture the lightseeds have any reason to make. The Lost Kin fight, by which the spirit seems to gain some form of closure, becomes available here too.)
False Knight/Failed Champion’s fights work on the same general principle. Now that he has a weapon he can attack Ghost, and his armor deals contact damage. The maggot inside the armor does not inflict contact damage; essentially both his boss fights consist of your whacking the armor until he’s stunned and pops out of the armor for a moment so you can hit his vulnerable real body, which is the only part of him that yields Soul when you smack him. In fact, his boss fights will last forever if you let him recover from being stunned on his own.
Between these two groups, Radiance very obviously doesn’t fit in the first, as she’s the final boss and is very vigorously trying to kill Ghost with various magic spells. You can tell from her Dream Nail dialogue that she’s furious about what the Pale King did to her and her people, and is afraid for her life. She is willing to use everything at her disposal to try to destroy Ghost so she can survive, go free, and get revenge for the Pale King’s crimes. If she could do contact damage to Ghost she would.
So, the only logical conclusion to make is that Radi falls into the second group of enemies that don’t inflict contact damage. She is physically incapable of causing any harm to anyone with only her body. Her magic is deadly as all get out and the 2 masks damage explosion noise probably haunts the nightmares of anyone who’s struggled fighting her, but without it she is helpless.
WHY CAN’T RADIANCE DO CONTACT DAMAGE?
It might be pretty hard to reconcile the fact that a character with Audre Lorde energy as potent as Radi Hollowknight’s is has a whopping 0 ATK. The biggest clues we get in terms of story context for her inability to inflict physical harm of any kind can be found within the culture of the moth tribe, who were her people.
Thistlewind, the backer-designed moth ghost who can be found in the Resting Grounds, tells you that the majority of moths were pacifists, and that individuals like them and like Markoth who learned to wield a nail were in the minority. Thistlewind appears to have learned to fight as a means of self-defense while they explored the crater area, and describes Markoth as having done so in order to “[brave] the edges of this world, hoping to uncover a truth long forgotten”. It sounds to me like Markoth was trying to recover parts of moth culture that were lost when their tribe was assimilated into Hallownest, or maybe even searching for Radiance or trying to learn what happened to her. (Judging that his corpse is hidden behind one of the Pale King’s shade gates it seems this didn’t go well. Thanks TPK.)
As far as fighting moths go there’s Marmu too, but she seems to be a special case, possibly raised in Hallownest's culture instead of with her tribe. We don’t actually get any sort of canon explanation for how a baby moth wound up as a child soldier who died defending the Queen’s Gardens, but given the overall tone of Hollow Knight as a game and all the colonization/Australian history parallel subtext, some horrifying possibilities come to mind.
So, if Thistlewind, Markoth, and Marmu are Outliers Lepidoptera and should not be counted, how did the majority of moths spend their time? According to Seer, who knows more about the tribe’s history than most (and to Quirrel, who points you to her if you defeat Uumuu before picking up the Dream Nail), the moths’ main prerogative was cultivating and developing dream magic. From the way the Seer describes dreams as a living history as you collect Essence, dream magic seems to be a parallel to the Dreaming (or Dreamtime), a spiritual concept in Indigenous Australian religion related to both history and myth.
To translate this into simple terms, the moths were by and large pacifists whose culture celebrated art, history, and spirituality.
Team Cherry tends to adapt at least some aspects of real-life bug behavior and biology into their sad cartoon bugs, so moths-as-pacifists tracks: Real moths do not really have any way to fight. They defend themselves from predators via their mobility and their markings, which tend towards either camouflage that helps them hide or bright markings intended to scare predators off by indicating they’re poisonous (therefore not good to eat) or look like the face of something much bigger and more dangerous than they are.
There's not that much we can glean about the moths in pre-Hallownest society aside from Seer’s dialogue, because Hallownest destroyed their civilization so thoroughly: Except in the Dream Realm (which is filled with Essence spirographs and the wisteria charms that decorate Seer’s room), their architecture can only be found anymore in hidden parts of the Resting Grounds and at the very top of the Crystal Peak where Radi’s statue and a fuckton of lore tablets Ghost doesn’t know how to read are located.
But, we know that the crater pre-Hallownest was home to a ton of diverse bug nations - the mosskin, the mushroom tribe, the mantises, Deepnest, the Hive, the flukes - and every SINGLE one of those had some kind of warrior tradition, as well as their own unique cultures. In the midst of all that it was only the moths who were pacifists, so from there we can tentatively assume that they were on good enough terms with their neighbors for there not to be any fighting. The mosskin in particular also had and still have a Higher Being on their side, though in the modern day Unn seems to be rather conflict avoidant to say the least.
And we know from Hallownest’s past dealings with the mantises and Deepnest that even having Two (2) Higher Beings isn’t enough to keep rival civilizations off your nuts if they hate you, so it’s improbable that Radiance just did all the moths’ fighting for them.
The only hint that the moths ever had beef with anyone at all is one of Radiance’s Dream Nail lines, “ancient enemy” - this is popularly theorized to refer to the Void and might be corroborated by the Void’s willingness to follow Ghost into Radi’s boss fights and fight alongside them. As the Void seems to be some sort of Higher Being/god of darkness and nothingness, and the Dream Nail’s only offensive ability is to kill Void creatures, the Void and creatures of Light appear to be in a position of mutual vulnerability. Some of the Pale King’s writings in his workshop, which identify the Void as a power in direct opposition to his, support this too.
It’s unclear whether the Void civilization and Radiance ever directly came to blows or whether they were just giving each other the stink eye over being natural enemies - personally I think the latter is more likely because the two civilizations existed on opposite sides of the crater*, and again, the moths were pacifists; plus when Ghost brings the Void along to Radi’s boss fight she is quickly and gruesomely overwhelmed by it.
What I am saying here is that if pacifism was such an integral aspect of moth culture, and Radiance epitomized her people’s culture, and she is 100% incapable of inflicting physical harm, she was probably a pacifist too.
DEEP DOWN YOU KNOW YOU WEREN'T BUILT FOR FIGHTING
Hallownest flourished for a long, long time between the Pale King and White Lady first establishing it and the initial outbreak of the Infection.
There’s no conclusive information in-game as to why this is. We can only guess: Maybe Radiance was so badly hurt or weakened by the moths’ assimilation that it simply took her That Long to become capable of the mass dream broadcast to Literally Everyone In Hallownest that would eventually become the Infection when Hallownest’s people tried to suppress it. Or, maybe it just took a long time for her to come up with a way to fight back. It’s possible that it took her a while to find the resolve to actually fight back, too, with her principles of pacifism in conflict with the necessity of defending herself and taking her people back. Maybe there was a change in the moths’ situation in Hallownest somewhere down the line that compelled her to step in - all the moths are super extremely dead at the time Hollow Knight starts, after all. Even Seer is eventually revealed to be a revenant like Ze’mer the Grey Mourner, only lingering in the world to pass on the Dream Nail and tell Radiance’s story. Maybe it was a combination of all those factors. Barring Team Cherry dropping in to explain this bit of Sekret Deep Lore, we are never going to know.
All we DO know for sure is that when we mosey into Hollow’s brain (and/or Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny our way to the top of Hallownest’s Pantheon) and challenge the literal actual sun to a fight, Radi takes the challenge with extreme prejudice and comes in swinging.
Something interesting I noticed while comparing the Radiance boss fights with the Pure Vessel fight is that some of their attacks are vaguely similar. Where warrior-mage characters like Xero and Markoth have physical weapons that they summon and manipulate with magic, Radiance and Pure Vessel both create nails and daggers out of Essence and Soul respectively. Both characters’ magical weapon attacks are similar in nature too: Some are used to create hazards that must be dodged or avoided, and some are fired directly at Ghost in radial patterns.
This begs a very sad chicken-and-egg question. Did Radi and Hollow develop these battle techniques independently of each other, has Hollow in their prime form somehow absorbed similar techniques to Radi through osmosis since they’re currently chained together by the brain... or is Radi mimicking and innovating on these attacks she knows Hollow can do?
All her other attacks seem very obvious for a light-themed character, after all: Beam attacks and blobs of light. A flash of bright light is also how she shakes off the Void the first time it tries to grab her, too, making for a strong argument that that’s the original natural defense she possessed, and that’s what she based most of her attack magic off of.
Making sword’s and knive’s from Essence when most of her people didn’t even handle these sorts of tools even at the height of her power and influence, though... that seems less like something that would come naturally to her. i don’t really know i don’t have a definitive answer or theory for this one it just Seems Possible and it’s fucking me up guys
Even the Infection - which began life as Radiance’s attempt to communicate, let’s remember, before it progressed to “The End Of Eva Disease Will Continue Until Someone Actually Listens To Me” and then finally Radi screaming “FUCK U LET ME OUT, GET THAT NEW SUNNY D BOTTLE THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME, HALLOWNEST EAT SHIT” during canon - does not appear to be fatal to living bugs until the tumorous growths grow so large they impede bodily functions, like real cancer. We can observe this phenomenon via a number of NPCs and enemies that are rediscovered as tumorous corpses after the whole Crossroads area becomes infected.
At least to me, all of this points to Radiance being a character to whom violence and causing harm doesn't come naturally, and who has resorted to these methods in desperation.
It actually reminds me a lot of False Knight/Failed Champion. It’s a very common theory among fans that when he stole Hegemol’s armor he killed Hegemol - this is a reasonable thing to believe, since Hegemol is the only one of the Five Great Knights of Hallownest who never appears at all in-game, not even as a corpse like Dryya and Isma. Like Radi, False Knight/Failed Champion is a character who rose up and turned to violence in order to protect his people, despite the maggots not being a belligerent species.
False Knight is one of the game’s first major bosses, sometimes the first boss that players encounter at all. And so Hollow Knight’s story bookends with two separate victims of a predatory system, one who lived within and was cannibalized by it, one outside of it who was deliberately targeted by the Pale King. Neither of them started out as a fighter, but both of them still adopted violence as a tool to protect themselves and their people. Radiance is as doomed as False Knight by the Pale King’s genocide, but just like False Knight, she has no intention of going quietly, and will rage against the dying of the light as only the literal actual sun can.
Cue Deedee Magno Hall voice clip. You all know the one.
*A footnote: There’s no conclusive evidence to tell us whether the Void civilization was contemporaneous with the other pre-Hallownest indigenous bug nations or whether it predated them. Mask Maker has a line suggesting that the Void civilization tried to expand throughout the crater in its heyday and that maybe this was linked to its collapse, but in general the Void lore is just too darn thin to draw firm conclusions - it’s like trying to speculate on the ancient stone age cultures of the Americas that came before pre-settler Indigenous countries when the only sources you can easily access are elementary school level US history textbooks. (To non-Americans: We mostly teach kids propaganda until they hit college-level courses and it sucks so much ass.) This is very realistic worldbuilding, but also please Team Cherry I want to know more about these ancient bugs who apparently got lost in the sauce
#hollow knight#hollow knight spoilers#hollow knight meta#the radiance#hk radiance#essay#long post under cut -#bad and naughty catholics go in the catholic wiggler
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Humans are Space Orcs, “Recruits.”
Wanted to do a little peace about what it would be like to join the crew of the harbinger. I hope you guys all enjoy :)
“Alright maggots! Hurry up, hurry up, stop screwing off and get our asses over here. This is the Space Core not a damned dog show. You there, yes you right there, stop staring gaped mouth at me like a beached fish, and get over here.”
The young recruits hurried across the tarmac at Fort Landing.The massive interspace launch field was a good five mile square of landing pads and supply chains surrounding massive interstellar battleships resupplying and rotating troops on and off. Boots thudded against concrete as troops of marines and army grunts walked past in their differing shades of camouflage.
The young group of soldiers hurried up to the officer nervously glancing around at the ships most of them had never been aboard a ship before, and some of them had never even been out of the region much less into space.
A couple of nervous recruits stepped to the front of the line two in flight suits and another group of young soldiers being transferred in to augment one of the fleet. They had been told they would be placed on one of the outgoing intergalactic units, but none of them had any idea WHICH one they wanted. Of course they had read through the suggestions given to them by other crew members aboard the different ships, and byar the Harbinger was the most recommended, but it was also the most competitive, sought after, and most people who joined didn’t decide to leave any time soon, and so there weren’t often many openings.
Now none of them were exactly sure why the Harbinger was so great, aside from being at the forefront of intergalactic travel, and run by Commander Vir of the UNSC who was a little more than legend and just slightly less than myth.
Otherwise it was also considered to be one of the most dangerous positions considering what they were doing out there. The crew was supposed to be interspecies with Delta units (also known as drev) on board.
There were rumors going around that the commander had managed to win himself the position of clan leader in a Drev contest of armed combat. Some said that he had defeated five armed Drev soldiers with his bare hands, though that thought was little more than conjecture and made anyone with a reasonable understanding of Drev just a bit skeptical.
Of course a few of them had been lucky enough to see an alien, though there were also some of them who hadn’t”
“Recruits Kimber, Alvarez, Han and McCaster!” The group of four recruits hurried forward, two young pilots one army engineer and one marine.
The officer eyed them up and down and shook his head, “Where the hell are they finding you guys these days scraping you off the back of a wet rock.” He flipped through the hologram on the flat of his hand, “Ah, here we go-” THey watched as his eyes widened a bit, and he stopped insulting them for long enough to look interested. He glanced up from his clipboard, “Well look at the four of you being all special. You’ve been requisitioned for the harbinger gonna go into deep space.” They glanced at each other in surprise, shock and excitement, “Hear they have some pretty freaky ass aliens on that ship, one bastard who can float and read minds or some shit, anyway get on the lot of you. They docked at landing pad A1 because they get special treatment, now GET GOING!”
With a muttering of surprise, they hurried off heading down towards the troop transports.
One of the young pilots leaned forward as they drove down the tarmac wind whipping past them as the sound of engines shook the ground below.
“Do you guys believe everything they say?”
The engineer turned to look at him with a raised eyebrow, “Everything about what?”
“Everything about the Commander? Everything about the Harbinger.”
“You’re gonna have to be more specific, there is a ton of shit they say.”
The young pilot rolled his eyes, “Take your pick. That he ran a marathon on an A-1 death planet, that he's a telepath that can speak to aliens, that their doctor is an alien, that half the ship is drev, that he's mostly a cyborg, that they have alien pets, that he stopped an intergalactic war.”
Someone waved him off, “Obviously false.”
Another one of the recruits leaned in closer, “I heard the guy’s a extrial.”
“The fuck is an extrial.”
“You know one of those people who screws aliens.”
“ fucking disgusting.”
“Dude, you serious? leave them alone there is nothing wrong with that?”
“What ISN’T wrong with that?”
“Both parties agree besides I bet you screw your cousin so-”
“BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP.” They did as the marine turned around the glower at them, “Doesn't matter what they are or are not. We have to make a good impression. So shut up we’re almost there.”
The troop transport came to a stop, and the four of them stepped out onto the tarmac looking up at the ship. It was big, blocky and dark looked like a much older model than some of the others sitting on the launch field, but what it lacked in beauty, it held in reputation.
At the moment it was busy being stocked by the people on the ground, though they did notice a group of people lounging around on some of the crates outside.
Staring at the ship, they didn’t see anything out of the ordinary, no aliens or anything… so far.
Awkwardly they walked towards the ship not sure where to go or what to do seeing as there were no officers to greet them. They were just heading past the crates and their lounging occupants when someone whistled.
“FRESH MEAT!” They were followed by heckling from the group sitting on the crates. They could have been marines or army grunts, but it was hard to tell. The group of them sat up both men and women.
One man in the middle slowly chewing n a piece of gum and wearing aviators making him look like he was trying to hard, “Hey, you four c’mere.”
With nowhere else to go, they approached slowly.
The group moved from lounging to sitting atop their crates.
“What are you recruits here for.”
They shuffled a little, “Two pilots a marine and an army engineer uh…. Sir?”
THe gum chewer grinned slowly nodding at one of the other guys, “Sir…. I like that makes me sound special.” He leaned forward, “Well they won't have anything for you to do until they are done loading the ship with cargo, so come on sit down and let's take a look at you.”
All together, they were rather nervous, but they still came up and sat on the crates with who they learned to be were a group of marines.
A younger, tan young man leaned over and held out a hand, “Ramirez.” They shook the man’s hand nervously glancing towards the gum chewer behind his dark sunglasses who was grinning knowingly at them.“So two pilots, an engineer and a marine.” He glanced up at the sky, “Well go on let’s hear a little about you.”
Most of them didn’t really intend to say anything, but somehow Sunglasses managed to draw it out of them, had them talking until he had practically unraveled their life stories. It was almost disconcerting how the man could do that, and the group of them were rather nonplussed by the time the conversation began to die away not entirely sure how they had gotten here.
“So, is there anything you want to know about the ship, the people, the perks etc etc.”
“Is it true that you have an entire Drev clan on the ship?”
Sunglasses grinned, “A good half of one at least maybe a dozen or so. An entire clan can be up to five hundred in one population, as many people as we have on the crew. So really I should restate and say that we only have a teth of a clan.”
The group glanced between each other.
“What other aliens do you have on the ship?”
Sunglasses leaned back against the crate hands behind his head, “Oh well we have a few. There is Convict of course, he’s a starborn, watch out for that asshole, he can read minds. Don’t plan on having any sort of privacy. Than we have Krill, he's our surgeon, ask him and he will tell you he's the best in the galaxy maybe the universe. Then after that we have the spiderlings.”
“The what?”
“Well technically their presence is classified, but you will find out. Type of alien can incorporate the DNA of other animals into their own offspring, some asshole got himself stuck with an alien egg sack and now we have alien hybrids on the ship.”
“No shit.:”
“Yeah shit, not kidding with you. Watch out for the one named Glados, she's a real jerk sometimes, to everyone accept the Commander of course.”
“Tell us about him.”
There was a shifting among the marines as they looked between each other. Sunglasses glanced back at them grinning before, “That asshole, yeah don’t get your hopes up, he’s a tool at best and an idiot at worse. I mean the guy wears an eyepatch, like he thinks he's some sort of space pirate.”
The marines slowly began to grin, “yeah he has some idiotic idea that the crew are his friends or some bullshit. We let him think that because it makes him easier to deal with.”
“Uglier than sin too.”
The group looked around at each other in confusion and concern not exactly sure why the crew was acting the way they were, “Are you guys serious, or just screwing with us.”
Sunglasses didn’t crack a smile, “Very serious.
Still skeptical, they looked around at each other, “I thought I heard he was a good pilot.”
Sunglasses waved a hand, ‘Never said he wasn’t a good pilot, I said he was a tool who doesn't know how to take anything seriously/”
Another marine shrugged, “Yeah, I mean they promoted him super early on in his career, guy isn't even past his dumbass twenties faze yet.”
“You make that sound like he will ever get past his dumbass twenties phase. I honestly think this is his last evolution.”
More shifting form the nervous new cremembers but sunglasses stood, “Might as well show you newbies around the ship, let you get to know things before we take off.” He pointed to the marines, don’t do any dumbass shit while I am gone.”
Moe dumb jokes followed as he left, and the young group hurried to catch up, “So uh…. You a marine then?” The young marine asked glancing downwards at his clothes that did nothing to hit at what his job aboard the ship was, “Not exactly.”
The man answered.
“Than what do you do?”
“I’m their CO.”
“So you are a marine?”
“I didn’t say that.” They followed him up the long ramp and into the belly of the ship where cargo crates were being stacked. Men and women in various stages of work hurried past them greeting sunglasses with a nod and a salute.
“So you’re pretty high up?” One of the pilot’s asked
Sunglasses shrugged, “You could say that.”
“So you spend a lot of time with the commander than?”
The man sighed, “Unfortunately yes…. Too much time.”
They made their way around a corner and nearly ran face first into a massive shape. The young recruits yelped in surprise, one of them making an extremely girlish squeal as they realized what they had run into. The form was absolutely massive, nine feet tall or more with six limbs and a head that was vaguely reminiscent of a bird. It thrust its head down at them with a critical eye and the hard light on the ship rolled over its bloody red carapace.
“Cannon.”
The massive Drev inclined it’s head, “ Lod dazha tadazh? Zhe dazha nehjakazi.”
They blinked in confusion for a long moment all feeling the strange sensation as the translation software booted up, and a moment later, a very human voice. “Who are these, I don’t recognize them”. The voice was pleasant enough, a deep rumble.
“Who the hell names their kid Cannon?” One of the pilots said realizing to late that he had probably just insulted a massive ass alien that looked like it could kick his ass.
Sunglasses turned to look at him, “It’s actually a word in his language, should be pronounced Kanan. It means `noble.” He got a pat on the shoulder, “Try not to be a dickhead alright. Most of the Drev have names like that, usually after an attribute or a force of nature.”
“What’s your name.” The Drev asked, the translation so smooth it was almost seamless integration over his real voice.
The young man stammered, “R-richard.”
The alien looked at him for a long contemplative moment, “Isn’t the nickname that goes along with richard….. Dick?”
That made the other four laugh as the large alien trundled past to show, to their surprise, he was wearing a bionic brace around one of his legs.
“Damn Cannon, they should have called you savage instead, DAMN!” He turned back, “Anyway, keeping the tour moving, try not to insult anyone else alright. Cannon is relatively good humored, but I can’t guarantee the other Drev won’t challenge you to a duel for their honor.”
There was a soft murmuring among the men, but they followed awkwardly behind as the CO led them through the ship showing them to the rec room, the mess hall, engineering and so on. They began to see ore evidence of alien activity, mostly those huge Drev things who were, surprisingly colorful, as compared to the pictures the media tended to release them. They greeted the CO with traditional muttering in their own language which he returned in kind. The translation generally just ut it as good morning though there were multiple versions.
They were walking down one long corridor when one of the recruits yelped and cursed looking as if he was about to piss himself. The others followed his gaze upwards where a face leered down at them from the piping and ductwork.
The man stopped a few feet ahead not bothering to look up, “Stop being an asshole convict, come and show yourself.” The strange alien creature did as told floating down like some ethereal sort of space angel, all white and surrounded in billowing ribbons. He wore an anti-gravity belt and a strange set of gloves.
The CO turned, “Well everyone, this is Conn, he is our ship’s resident telepath. Yes He can read minds, no I can’t make him stop, but yes he will generally keep all your deep dark secrets for his entertainment. No, you won’t be able to tell when he’s invading your minds, only the Commander can talk to him that way .”
The alien waved at them with a malicious grin on his strangely humanoid lips.
“But that's ok because killing him is easy. If he ever gives you trouble just threaten to take off that gravity belt of his. He was born in zero Gs so it will snap his spine like an uncooked spaghetti noodle.”
“Convict’ raised a hand and made a move to flip the CO off, an effect somewhat damaged by the fact that he only had four fingers.
Nervously, they walked past, and the alien grinned malevolently at them. Unfortunately with the way the human mind worked all of their deepest darkest secrets seemed to be at the forefront from their heads as they did so.
THey took a walk up another few decks, and into what appeared to be the med bay, which hissed open as they stepped in. Inside they were surprised to find another strange alien creature directing the placement of some new medical equipment, “And ry not to drop it on yourselves, I have gone almost a month without any major accidents aboard this ship, and I intend to keep it going.” The spiderly little creature turned in a broad circle its unblinking orange prismatic eyes falling on them.
“Dr. These are our new recruits, Kimber, Han McCaster and Alvarez. Just giving them the grand tour.”
They stared on in awe and wonder as the little alien moved closer.
“Are you really a doctor.”
The creature stared at them looking almost offended, “Are you really a pilot?”
He stood back in shock, he had not expected the aliens to be so aggressively sassy, or even know how to use sarcasm. A had fell on his shoulder, “Forgive McCaster, he seems to have a bit of a pension for running his mouth. Anyway, I’m just taking them the last few decks up to the bridge, is there anything you want to warn them about?”
The doctor looked at them with a critical eye before, “If you are going to stick anything up your ass, just make sure it has a base otherwise it’s going to get stuck, and I am going to have to either A get someone to stick their hand up there or B do surgery,”
The CO laughed, “Always good advice doctor.”
With faces scrunched with confusion, the group followed the CO back into the hallway and up the stairs the last few decks and onto the bridge . The bridge crew was already hard at work on systems checks barely noticing as the group of them entered.
Looking to the right they saw another one of the Drev sitting in a chair just to the side of the captain’s seat.
“Oh, everyone meet, Sunny our Chief Weapons Specialist.” The bright blue Drev turned around in her seat looking them over with a critical gold eye. She was actually pretty short compared to the massive male they had met earlier.
“So what does her name mean?”
The Co looked at the kid with a raised eyebrow, “It means involving or having to do with large amounts of light produced by a star onto the planet’s surface, sometimes known as the sun.”
The other three laughed at him and he wilted,” I thought, with the other…”
“With the other guy, his real name just so happens to sound like an english word, her name does not, so we call her Sunny. Sunny and Cannon are brother and sister from the same clan.” The Blue Drev stood and walked over to look them over. Though she was short for a Drev she towered more than a foot over some of them.
“Scraping the bottom of the barrel with these four.” She said, her voice over the translation was obviously female but not entirely feminine if that made sense. Somehow it suited her.
There was a sharp squeal from somewhere and the group of them turned, shrieking again and backing away as a group of the most HORRIFIC creatures came scuttling across the floor. About as big as medium dogs, and with similar heads, they skittered across the floor on spider bodies. One of the recruits leaped back into a chair picking his feet up off the floor, the other three went into defensive posturing.
Most of the creatures ignored them entirely, one of them making a B-line for the CO Crawling up his back and locking it’s strange feet over his shoulders like the most grotesque backpack ever. One contented itself by lying on his feet, and the other woman began sniffing at them. After a moment a very miffed looking German Shepherd appeared following them and collapsed by the Captain’s chair with a grumble.
The one on the man’s shoulders glowered at them, it’s strange humanoid eyes bright green with anger and intensity. It opened its mouth wide and a strange robotic sound came forth, “Go…. away.” They stepped back even further in shock. The voice was strange, like that of a talking bird, not entirely human at all.
The man turned his head and frowned at the spidery creature reaching up to pat her hairless dog-like head with one hand, “Oh Stop that Glados.”
“No.”
He rolled his eyes, “Manners.”
“No.”
“You know ever since you learned that word, it's been the bane of my existence.”
“W-what the hell are those things.”
The Co looked up at them, “These guys are the spiderlings ⅔ s adaptid ⅓ human. This Is Glados,” He pointed down, “That is Hal and the one sniffing at you guys is Cortona. The commander named them, they are technically his after all.”
The recruits started on in awe and disgust, “You mean he like DID IT with an alien.”
The man grimaced, “More like he got roped into incubating an alien egg sack against his will. I hear the process was rather unpleasant.”’
They collectively made a face as the CO scratched the spiderling under the chin, “he says its not as bad as everyone makes it out to be. Besides, the adaptids were just doing what adaptids do, and that is borrow DNA from other creatures.”
“Where IS the Commander anyway.”
The Blue Drev looked over at them with some interest before growing bored and looking away
The man shrugged, “Who the hell knows.”
And then an officer ran onto the deck, “Sir, Transmission from the GA.”
At that moment the CO stopped smiling, and pulled off his sunglasses. The group of them were stunned into silence as he pulled an eyepatch from his pocket and slipped it over his missing eye. The other one was a bright green, not dissimilar to that of the adaptid. With the sharp clatter of boots on metal he walked back to sit in the Captain’s chair dropping the adaptid to the floor with a growl of protest.
He pressed something on the side of the chair, and a hologram leaped up in front of his face.
“Greetings commander.”
“Chairwoman.”
The group looked at each other with miffed expressions.
“How the hell did we not see that coming.”
“Because you’re a dumbass.”
“Like you knew, asshole.”
The other one stopped them with a raised hand, “Is he wearing heelies?”
The group of them turned their heads to the side and confirmed that the man was, in fact, wearing a pair of heelies this entire time.
There was a soft snort from behind them, and they turned to see the Drev ‘Sunny’ sitting at her station.
“Welcome to the crew of the Harbinger.”
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Survey #457
“blue are the words i say and what i think / blue are the feelings that live inside of me”
Do you buy your lingerie at Victoria’s Secret? No. That shit is so overpriced and not for my size group.
Would you ever use an online dating service? I never would again.
Are you good at multitasking? ABSOLUTELY NOT.
Have you ever eaten Frosted Mini Wheats? Ugh, those are so gross.
What does your bikini look like? You think THIS bitch wears a bikini???????????????????????
Does age really matter in a relationship? To an extent, yes.
How much does the last person you kissed mean to you? I honestly don't even know if I'd be here without her. Almost like magic, Sara popped back into my life right after I returned home from the hospital following my suicide attempt. She helped make recovery possible as a solid source of support.
Do you use lotion? Not NEARLY enough. My skin is so dry; I need to.
Do you believe in teenage love? I experienced it deeply and thoroughly, so yes.
Have you ever sat on the roof of your house? No.
Do you like Sublime? I like that one popular one of theirs. "Santaria" or whatever it's called?
What’s your favorite movie genre? Paranormal horror, especially the "found footage" type. It's creepy to imagine it being actually real.
Is there a celebrity that you’d be willing to have a one night stand with? If he was single? I know in my gut I would lmaooooo
Do you want to live in your current town the rest of your life? OH MY GOD PLEASE NO
If you found out today your best friend was gay what would you do? She's demisexual, so. She can like anybody.
If you could get a pet for free today-what kind/what name? A tegu, because it wouldn't need an enclosure that I don't have. I'd let it free roam. God, I can only imagine Roman's reaction.
How many people have you slept with? If you mean what I think you do by "slept," one.
Do you ever wish you had a family business to become a part of? Not really.
What’s the most gruesome way you could come up with to kill someone? Hunny, have you seen my dark RP????? The world best be glad I'm a pacifist lmfao
Do you think anyone deserves to die that way? I don't believe in torture, so no.
If you had to fight for survival, what would your weapon of choice be? A gun, I guess? I'd want something with range and that's quick. I wanted to say a bow and arrow, but preparing another arrow after shooting once could really cost you your life.
Where did you buy your favorite pair of jeans? I don't wear jeans anymore.
Do you have a large dog? We don't have a dog, period.
If not, are you afraid of them? No, I love big 'ole puppos!!!!! I just don't wanna own a dog myself.
Are you good at playing darts? Holy fuck no, I have NO hand-eye coordination. I once stabbed the guy at a balloon popping booth thing with a dart in the arm, if that tells you anything, ooooooooooof.
Do you like breaded chicken sandwiches? YESSSSSSSSS omg
Do your parents know that/if you smoke? They know that I don’t.
Have you ever been under a blacklight? Omg so in elementary school, we did this thing once where we all washed our hands as best we could and then put them under some sort of light (maybe a blacklight, idk???) to see JUST how resilient germs are. You gotta scrub the fuck out ya hands, people.
How many pounds do you want to lose? I'd rather not share a number, but a lot.
What’s your favorite natural phenomenon? The Northern Lights.
Do you snore? Very surprisingly for someone with sleep apnea like mine, I actually don't.
How many people do you know with the same first name as you? Off the very top of my head, one, but it's spelled differently. I KNOW I know of a shitload more Brittanys, though.
Is it possible you could be pregnant? Well, I haven't been intimate with a man in years and just finished my period, so like-
Could you go a day without texting? I go most days without texting.
Do you have a step-parent? My dad is remarried, so yes.
If so, do you get along with them? She's EXTREMELY Christian, so her beliefs wildly disagree with mine, but I keep my mouth shut a lot just to keep the peace. She IS a very sweet woman, nevertheless, and am glad she and my dad are so happy together.
Does your current/last job require that you wear a uniform? My last job (which lasted not even two hours lol) did.
When will your driver’s license expire? My permit has been expired for like... two years.
Do you live in an apartment? No.
If the last person you kissed proposed to you what would you say? That's too wild a concept to even imagine. I'd probably ask if she was okay lmao.
Would you ever get back with one of your exes? Weeeelp, I want to get back together with Girt. Pretty badly.
Write a foreign word, and what it means: "Schadenfreude" is a German term that essentially means secondhand embarrassment, but it doesn't have a perfect translation.
Is there an ex you think about everyday? Inevitably. That's PTSD, my friends.
Who is the last person that you said I love you to, besides family members? Sara.
What's the worst thing you have ever said to anyone? Something along the lines of "no one could ever love you like I do." It boils my blood just typing that; I considered even deleting this question. That quote right there is fucking manipulation, even IF I thoroughly believed it.
Who was the last person to comment one of your pictures? I don't feel like looking.
Do you tend to go for older or younger when looking for someone to date? It's weird, I'm into slightly older-than-me guys, but probably girls who are barely a bit younger than me.
Have you ever been used? I don't think so.
Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head? Like I've said in plenty of surveys: Jason is probably a permanent fixture. But also as of the past two days, Girt's been living up there. I went from "hmmm I just don't know how I feel" to "FUCK I want to talk to him about how stupidly into him I am right this fucking INSTANT" pretty goddamn fast. It kinda scares me just because of how extreme my feelings are. Again. That's only ever gotten me hurt. Buuuut let's not get into that.
Have you ever got caught cheating on a test? No, because I've never tried to.
Will your next kiss be a mistake? I hope it won't be. But it's not like I know the future.
Have you ever worn an oxygen mask? Actually yes, when I was young and thought I was having an asthma attack or something. Mom had one for her own asthma. Then I obviously wore one for surgery.
What song do you want to be played at your funeral? "Paradise" by Coldplay is absolutely #1.
How many swear words are in the song you’re listening to? I'm not listening to music; I'm back to watching Gab play Sekiro.
What color was the last swimsuit you wore? Black.
Have you ever kissed anyone of the same sex, and if so, who? Yeah, just Sara.
Who did you last tell to ‘shut up’? Ha, I think my WoW friend Lyndsey, but only playfully, of course. We pick fun at each other all the time.
Would you ever get a tattoo of a boyfriend/girlfriend's name? NOOOOOOOOO.
Are you one of those girls who already have baby names picked out? I know what I'd name my kids IF I actually wanted any, yeah, but I don't.
Do you think guys with long hair are attractive? Yessss, I love long hair on guys.
Are any of your siblings taller than you? I think Ashley is a liiiiil bit taller? I know my brother is, for sure.
Have you ever scared someone so badly that they cried? Yikes, no.
When was the last time you wore high heels? Boy oh boy, no idea.
Is there someone that you want to hurt right now? Jeez, no thanks.
What was the most interesting or colorful birthday cake you’ve had? I don't remember, but I'm sure something from childhood.
What was the last thing someone bought you? Was it expensive? Mom bought me food from McD's, which obviously isn't expensive.
Do you have any interesting moles anywhere you don’t want people to know of? No.
Have you ever gotten high or drunk in a really formal place? Strong "no" there.
Do you ever write poetry and post it on any certain websites? On the very rare occasion I write poetry and actually like it, I'll sometimes post it on dA.
What do you miss most about your childhood? Actually, genuinely having fun and not dealing with fucking anhedonia.
Would you like to know the precise date of your future death? Hell no.
Do you photograph well? I'd like to hope so.
Are there any animals you flat out refuse to touch? Maggots and similar bug larvae.
What super power would you refuse, if it was offered to you, and why? Mind reading. It just sounds... awful and overwhelming.
What’s your favorite discontinued product that you wish would come back? Oh, I KNOW I have answers to this, just none are coming to me immediately and I don't feel like sitting here for five minutes thinking about it.
If adults had show and tell, what would you bring into work? My snek! :')
If you had a reset button for the last 10 years, would you press it? Tempting, but... I don't think I would. I cannot go through how deep my depression was again.
Who is someone you would never swear in front of? My nieces and nephew. Yes, I don't believe in profanity being a "thing" and is just a stupid human fabrication, but nevertheless I acknowledge societal standards and expectations, and they're way too young to get when you shouldn't say something like that and why.
Have you ever won a contest or competition? A few.
Who is your favorite TV character? I don't think I really have one?
Do you coo over other people’s babies? Not really, no. Sometimes I'll think they're super cute and be like "awww," but I don't like... squeal and spaz like some people do.
What is something that makes you very squeamish? VOMIT.
Has there been a celebrity death that really affected you? Steve Irwin got me deeper than anyone else. Chester Bennington hit real hard, too.
If you’re out of high school, have you stayed in touch with your high school friends? If you’re still in school, do you think you will? Most of my closest ones, yes, at least via Facebook.
What’s a movie that you want to see? Old movie, but Jacob's Ladder. It was a massive influence on Silent Hill, so naturally, I'll probably love it. It's a classic, anyway.
Do you use the same username everywhere online or do you have a lot? I use "Ozzkat" in most places, but I do have some other ones for different sites.
Who was the last person you know who became pregnant? My friend Ana recently revealed she's expecting her second child, a boy.
What fad were you actually into? I have zero clue.
Have you ever tailgated? Would you want to? Fuck no. That's how so many wrecks happen. My sister legit got in a wreck with an 18-wheeler mostly because she was tailgating (which she does BADLY); she was trying to pass, and he moved over at the same time because he couldn't see her coming around. It's a borderline miracle she got out with only some cuts, bruises, and a seatbelt burn. Have patience, people. Get off cars' asses.
Why did you fall for the last person romantically? Look, don't get me started on this. There are a shitload of reasons and I have been way too emotional over this the past few days laksdfja;lwke
What’s the last thing you had to eat? A bagel w/ cream cheese for breakfast.
Do you ever pick up your house phone? We don't have a landline phone.
Truth be told, are you more into looks or personalities the most? Personalities, for sure. I cannot be into you if your personality isn't attractive.
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Shitty Holidays
The idea for this is based from art @ywwywwy did of Frank at a table sitting on one end as his foster family is at the other. As for how Frank is, it’s this idea of Frank as a wolf because hey, why not? lol. So here it be!
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There was light flakes of snow drifting within the wind outside. There was the squeals of two kids filled the house along with the gentle voices of a mother and a father trying to get their children to calm down. But... There’s a third, sitting quietly at the other end of the table as yellow eyes glance from the food on his plate to the chatty family on the other side of the table.
Frank Morrison, age 16, was sitting there as the family chatted away. Keen ears picked up a chuff of a dog under the table. Honestly, the dog being a German Shepard, was the only good thing out of this new foster family. Though at first he and the dog didn’t get along, it was a day alone he got to have the house to himself and, like usual, the dog would growl and bark at him every time he took one step outside. That ended quick when he had shifted and he established dominance.
That aside, the family themselves didn’t really pay attention to him. For sure when they agreed to have him that they were twitchy on the idea of his skull jester tattoo with flames and baseball bats. He found it cool. The previous couple was ok with him having one since they had tattoos like sleeves, on the legs, small ones, and various others. The only problem in the end with that family was the constant arguing and they fact that the two were having a divorce. That was two months ago and here he is with this family that were just iffy with him in general.
“Frank, are you going to eat?”
The voice made him jump a bit. He focused his gaze to the father looking at him as the mother does her best to calm down the two maggots. The brother kept trying to steal his sister’s food and she would throw her balled up napkin at him. Yellow eyes blinked as he got his mind back to the present.
“If you don’t eat up, you can go to your room.”
His “room” being what is the little girl’s room with a bed that at least he is left with sleeping propped up or with his feet hanging off the edge. Frank glances down to the food sitting there that he can smell is loosing its heat and how the strong scent is fading. He stifled the whimper that wanted to rise up. There’s no denying that he’s hungry, that the wolf deep down was starving. He just.. There’s too much moving around homes that he lost appetite. It doesn’t help that the mother took her time to make this dinner for Thanksgiving (second Monday of October), and he’s sitting here having not even touched it.
“Louis, leave him be. We only have him for a month or so till they can find better housing for him. Or if his parents-”
“They don’t want shit to do with me..” He couldn’t contain the slight growl to his voice. He hates it how every family he’s been with when they talk about the time they have with him that they mention “if his parents want him back.” Bullshit, he would say all the time. They left him for a reason. Over a stupid fuckin’ reason. So what if he’s a late shifter? They didn’t even bother with him further! Not his fault that also their marriage fell apart.
“Oi! Watch your language *garçon,” Louis said firmly. Frank didn’t know French, nor did he care. If it was an insult, fuck this guy. Fuck this. Fuck all of this. He’s sick and tired of the constant moving, families one moment saying they’ll take him in and then the next moment doing shit that hurts that either he calls up the foster home or the family does, blaming him for shit he didn’t do.
Frank stands up, slamming down the fork and knife in his hands down onto the table with a clatter. His breathing picked up, his jaw felt strained with feeling his teeth get bigger along with his body. It wants to expand, to let the wolf raging inside out to maul the stupid Frenchy.
“Yeah? Well you try being only 5 years old when your parents not only want you, but procced to go through a divorce as well that they throw you into foster care because of you! You try bouncing around home after fucking home from abusive families, from groomers, from cultists. You try going through a family who honestly wanted you and were denied of adopting you that it fucks you up.”
This made Louis stand up enraged with his face going red. “Go to your room!”
“That ain’t even my fuckin room!”
“Boys! Please calm down! It’s Thanksgiving and we should be happy and-”
The dog barked. A loud sharp one. Cheder, as the dog is named, stands and comes out from under the table with a growl. He sensed Frank’s anger and was ready to act on it. To protect him. This pissed off the man further.
“Cheder, come here.”
“I don’t think he wants to listen.”
“*Tais-toi. Cheder. Come. Here.”
The German Shepard still didn’t move. He just walked backwards to stand next to Frank. Pack mentality. In all honesty, he and the dog did grow to have a bond with the time he’s been here ever since shifting. Boy, Frank couldn’t help the shit-eaten grin that spread across his face.
“That’s it. I’ve had it with your attitude! We’ve tried being nice to you and-”
“Nice?! Ha! You did nothing but ignore me! You didn’t do shit to stop Cheder from snapping at me the first few times he was inside the house! When it came to shopping for clothes for school you picked out shit for me! You let Maggie and Wayne pick out their outfits, but didn’t let me do shit. We won’t get on the topic of the tattoo, but oh how I fuckin hate it when you won’t even look at me when you talk to me like a fucking man.”
This made everyone go quiet. Even Cheder. Maggie looks to her father with tears pricking at the corner of her eyes.
“Papa.. I’m scared...”
Louis hushed her gently, but by this point Frank had enough. With a scoff, he turned on his heel and headed for the back door to the backyard. He needed to run, get it out of his system. He could hear Louis mutter about calling the Alberta Foster Care to get him in the morning, but again, he didn’t care. He heard the mother coming after him, calling his name as he headed out into the cold night. He knew Cheder followed, but over the fence the dog couldn’t.
Frank didn’t care that he heard the mother become frantic quick at seeing him hop the fence. Once up and over, he broke out into a run, wanting to get far from them. Wanting to get as deep as he could before shifting mid run. Dark brown fur took over what was once fair skin was along with a lighter tone underside. Two legs and arms popped and changed to being four legs and paws as big as his hands. Everything from his chest, shoulders, thighs, and head enlarged. Face extended out to a muzzle and a wet nose. Every human tooth grew and sharpened to that of a wolf as the final touches of ears and tail sprouted.
There standing in the place of where a boy was, was a Brown Timber wolf, but bigger due to him being a werewolf than a shapeshifter. Fully formed, Frank wasted no time sprinting deep into the forest till it was just him and the surrounding trees with what little snow flakes got through the thicket of the pine branches. Out here, he’s free. Far from the grasp of any human, far from the grasp of the foster system. It’s out there where the wind blew through his fur that he felt better with the cold nipping at the pads of his paws and his nose, the breeze making him blink a few times over. It’s out there where he spent the rest of the night, curled under some upturned roots of a tree.
By morning, he woke to the sound of his name being called. Multiple voices ranging from male to female. Some he even recognized as the trees made their voices echo down to where he is. He didn’t want to move, didn’t want to go back. But fate isn’t his to decide. With a sigh, Frank stood up and shook himself out and stretched before shifting back to himself. A sigh left him as he made his way towards the voices.
The person assigned to helping him find a foster family was there, the parents Louis (reluctantly) and Hanna were there along with an officer or two. Upon seeing him, Hanna just rushed at him and pulled him in for a tight hug. He didn’t reciprocate it. The adults talked as they headed back to the house. He wasn’t surprised to see all his stuff packed up.
Not a word was spoken as Frank grabbed it and headed out to the waiting running car. In an instant, Cheder came rushing out after him with loud whines and practically shoved his head into Frank’s stomach. This made him sigh as he bent down to pet the dog, lowering his head to place on Cheder’s with a hand going through thick fur. If he could, he would’ve taken Cheder with him. But he can’t. It was like the German Shepard knew his thoughts because the dog backed away despite still whining, then turned to head back into the house with head and tail low.
There was no goodbyes as he got into that car to head back to the foster home, no glances back. Nothing. The person that drove tried to ask him questions on what happened, but he didn’t answer, didn’t want to as his eyes watched houses change as they made their way back to the major town of Alberta. Frank was just tired of all of this, tired of the changes and faces he doesn’t bother to remember. Sleep sounded like the better option for now. Getting himself as comfortable as possible, he let his eyes drift shut with the cold window to his forehead, letting himself let go and doze off with not wanting to think what the next family would be like.
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Has anybody ever told you that you’re too young to be in love?
from what I remember that could happen
Did you learn anything from the last BIG mistake you made?
no comment...
Do you have a favorite brand of shoes?
nah
Do you like rollercoasters with big drops?
I don’t do rollercoasters
Do you have any inside jokes with your parents?
yes
Did you ever want a pony for a gift as a kid?
nope
Do you know who your mom’s favorite singer is?
she doesn’t really have one because she doesn’t listen to music tbh except what I blast
Have you ever gone to a school that made you wear uniforms?
middle school
Have you ever tried to surf?
nooo
Do you want to learn?
absolutely not
Did you pick out the furniture in your bedroom?
I wish...
Yes or no: Apple pie?
yes
Yes or no: Candy apples?
no
Are you a heavy sleeper?
not anymore
Honestly, have you ever re-gifted something? What was it?
plenty of stuff
How many months away is your birthday?
1-2
Is the closet in your bedroom a walk-in closet?
I’d love to have one like this :3
Do you enjoy cooking?
I do not
Which one of your family members do you wish you could see more often?
grandma... and aunt Alice
Have you ever (accidentally or not) set off a car alarm?
just by walking by
Do you call it sitting “criss-cross” or “Indian-style”?
criss-cross is less offensive
Do you have dimples when you smile?
I do indeed
Do you find graveyards scary?
Jack kinda does
Have you ever carved anything into a tree?
don’t do that :(
Do you give or get advice more often?
give
If you have caffeine late in the day, does it cause you to struggle with your sleep?
no idea, I don’t drink coffee
If you have a pet, have they ever embarrassed you in public or in front of friends or family members? What happened?
sigh...
Do you leave the house every single day?
almost
Would you rather spend the day at the beach, or a day in the snow in the mountains?
beach
Do you prefer tops that are plain, or ones with patterns/logos/slogans?
plain are lame
Do you enjoy buying gifts for other people, or do you never know what to buy them?
it’s complicated
What book do you wish they’d make into a film or TV series?
few of my favorites
Do you prefer zip-up or overheard hoodies?
overheard, I hate zippers in clothes
When was the last time you stayed overnight away from home? Was this with friends, family or in a hotel somewhere? What was the occasion?
recently, my partner[s] apartment, no occasion
Would you ever be interested in seeing a live magic show?
I already did but I don’t remember anything
What’s your favourite period to learn about in history? What got you interested in this particular era?
I liked interesting facts no matter of the period, I hated dates and names
Do you still use or carry cash, or do you pay for everything via card?
cash forever
Are there any TV shows that remind you of your grandparents for some reason?
Moda na sukces głównie
Do you know how to tie a tie without looking it up? Did you have tie in school (uniform)?
maybe, we didn’t
Do you prefer having carpets or hardwood floors?
hardwood
When was the last time you took a bath? Is this something you do often or do you prefer taking showers?
last night and gonna have one now
What’s your opinion on clothes for dogs? If you have a dog, have you ever bought any clothing items for them?
cute but my dog doesn’t wear any
What will you be doing once you finish this survey? What were you doing before you started taking it?
I will go to sleep, I’m also playing Choices
When was the last time you played a game of Monopoly? Did you play until the end or did everyone get fed up and start arguing?
this year, we don’t argue about it which is weird because we often argue in general
Do you have anything fun or exciting planned for tomorrow?
I hope I will meet with Slytherin system
Don’t you love it when you meet a dog or cat and they instantly love you, especially when the owner says “they normally hate strangers!”?
awww
sounds like Nat don’t ya think? :P
Would you rather do a wordsearch or a crossword?
Word Search but sudoku is cooler
Do you prefer multi coloured or plain white fairy lights?
good question
Do you have a favourite TV detective (eg. Sherlock, Poirot)?
Poirot <3
and Don Matteo
Do you hear any animals right now?
not even kotszop
Is your trashcan full?
it’s small so it’s almost always full
Are you hungry?
am not
Is it rainy where you’re at right now?
not tonight
Is your dishwasher full?
we don’t own a dishwasher
Do you like to wear gloves?
not really
Are you wearing anything pink right now?
nothing
What is the creepiest bug you’ve ever saw?
maggots are
Do you chew on your lip?
might
Are you afraid of needles?
I’m not
Do you like Batman?
mhm
Can you see a star shape in the room you are in?
I can
Do you use hand sanitizer?
obvi
Are you in any kind of club or group that is trying to save animals?
I’ve been signing petitions
Where were you two hours after you got up, and what were you doing there?
dentist...
Have you ever played fetch with a dog?
it didn’t listen XD
Do you use Netflix?
if I only had an account...
Do you play games on your computer?
when I’m in the mood
Did you have anything bad happen to you today?
...
Do you use the term “lol” if you don’t have anything to say?
not when I have nothing to say wtf
Should you be sleeping right now instead of taking this survey?
yup :x
Do you currently have any blemishes on your face?
yep
Do you use smileys often in text convos?
maybe
Would you ever consider being a cannibal?
hell no
Did you forget something important in the past week?
yeah
Are the floors in your house creaky?
there are creaky places and I love it
Do you fear death?
sorta
Is your mouth dry?
it’s complicated
Do you have any scars from an animal?
weirdly no
When was the last time it snowed where you live? Do you like snowy weather or is it just a pain?
this week, it’s pain!
9 - When was the last time you got off work early? What was the reason?
I don’t have a job
What time did you wake up this morning? Did you get out of bed right away?
8 and had to
Do you ever watch movies or TV shows that require you to read subtitles?
why not?
When was the last time you had a haircut? When was the last time you dyed your hair (if you ever have)?
Nat is gonna kill me for this bangs, I dyed my hair over 5 years ago
Do you prefer wearing tight-fitting or loose-fitting clothes?
loose
What was the last piece of good news you received? Was it expected?
pfft
What time of year do you start listening to Christmas music?
after Halloween
Are there any names you can think of that just go well together?
where should I start...
Do you enjoy museums?
whatever
Do you have a username you use for everything? Or does it change each site?
it changes but not for EACH
Do you have any disorders or disabilities?
what I DON’T have...
Do you ever watch How To videos?
in my whole life like a few
Did you have a tree house when you were a kid? If so, did you ever fall from it?
I wanted to but never did
Do you enjoy designing things? Anything?
I sure do
Do you know what a raincheck at stores is?
I know
Can you learn the lyrics of a song by ear, or do you have to search them up?
I never remember even the titles...
Do you like the name Amy?
Amy Anya :(
Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? Are you close to that person at all?
I called my dad but he couldn’t talk so...
he’s my friend
Do you enjoy watching bloopers or outtakes from TV shows?
could
Have you ever dreamed of owning your own shop? What kind of thing would you like to sell?
antiques and such
Are you a twin? If not, would you ever want to be a twin? If you are a twin, do you ever wish you weren’t?
;)
Would you ever want to go and visit the moon?
it’s bought by Tom Cruise, no thx
Does anything on your body hurt or ache right now?
shut up...
When was the last time you struggled to get to sleep? Was there was a specific reason for that?
constantly
When was the last time you had a cold? With everything going on in the news, did you worry that it was COVID?
my dad had a cold
Do you think people should have to pass a test in order to own pets?
it’s not the worst idea
When was the last time you fell asleep/had a nap during the day? Is this something that happens often?
it happens very rarely
so how are you today?
bad
have you ever been to London?
in the past life lmfao
do you enjoy going to the library?
heh...
what’s the last movie you watched?
we rewatched Asterix and Obelix
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Our talks with the council are concluded, so we follow their instructions and head right into the ominous pyramid next door. We're mistaken if we think our magic will get us through this quickly because the second we step inside, we're plunged into darkness. Not even a chorus of, "I have dark-vision!", can save us from this fate. Luckily, a few of us are able to cast echolocation and can lead the others. There's monsters and fears a plenty scattered about the labyrinth, but it feels like a constant dead end to our progress. For hours, we wander and pass by maggot queens, memory siphoning toys, and rooms very much dedicated to the things that make our skin crawl. And this is where our next mistake begins.
The council said there were six trials. There's six of us. So obviously, all of these Scare Zones are the trials themselves, so we're well on our way to completing this. We're told otherwise once we step into a ring full of corpses and a very angry minotaur. For some reason, he's willing to stop his rage to talk with us. He tells us that this labyrinth is only the first trial, so there's plenty more horrors to come. We bid him farewell and make our way back to the maggot queen, deciding that hugging and talking our way through this isn't going to work. Upon her death, I'm granted a small flame above my head that finally pierces through the darkness...but we don't realize that this is the key. Instead, Elathera dispels it from me the second I start hearing voices and things that aren't there. We find a bonfire with some other unfortunate souls and call it a day.
The next leg of our journey is chock full of hopeless wandering. We still have no clue how to get out of the Trial of Darkness and there's definitely no way we can brute force our way through it. I have an unfortunate brush with death as I climb down a hole to inspect a shiny. Surprise! It's a rune capable of shouting nasty words at me in necril. Nobody was prepared to face hidden death rocks, but I'm sure we learned a valuable lesson about translating the tongues of the dead. Where do we go from here? We have no fucking clue. So when in doubt, split the party! We all pair up and set out, hoping that mapping out the labyrinth will reveal something important.
Industria finds the trial designed for her. A large mirror that shows her body wilting away and when somebody else peers inside, the ashes of her corpse strangle the life out of the reflections of her friends. She decides to carry it along with her and Lucky, but as it continues to taunt her, she smashes the mirror and fails her trial. Elathera and Jordeira stumble upon a room full of vaguely cat-like statues with tentacles. It's Jordeira's trial, though he's adamantly refusing to do a thing with this and heads into the next room. Every wall is made of glass, showing picturesque images of a beach. They're both curious as to what lies beyond it, so Elathera disintegrates the glass and is promptly sucked into a plane of existence that is beyond her comprehension. She returns completely shaken by the experience, but desperately wants to understand it.
Me and Rikius find a room of nothingness and yet it feels like there's something in here. The presence I'm feeling is familiar, but with nothing revealing itself, I have no idea what's going on. We carry on, finding a room full of rats, which is lovingly dedicated to me. Our time to map this place out is up, so we reconvene in a nearby room to go over everything we've found. While we found a whole lot on our journey, it still isn't enough to tell us how to get out of here. While the others watch Industria help ferry along the soul of a vicious ghost, I slip into the room of nothingness with the Mask of Lochoria on. Thankfully, the presence I felt is Iolond, who's upset because somebody went somewhere they shouldn't have. I know exactly who did it as Elathera explained her brain melting trip into the void, but I'm not willing to rat her out. Secrets for secrets though and as it shares a helpful tip about the labyrinth, I call Elathera out, but make them promise me they won't hurt her.
"Those that are cowardly suffer more." is Iolond's word of advice to me. If I'm to tell everyone else, the words didn't come from them. With their advice passed along, we all realize we have no choice but to face our fears. Though Industria failed her trial, her success in ferrying the ghost's soul earns her a flame. It's my turn next and into the room of rats I go. A sea of rats surround me, all squeaking and biting me as I panic and try to figure out what to do. I pet a rat. And then another. I dole out pets until a special rat emerges from the pack. A spotted boy who I name Gerald. In that moment; he crawls up into my hair and turns into a flame. There's another room of glass and we lock Elathera in it, thinking that this is her trial. So of course, she disintegrates the wall and is plunged into the void yet again...garnering another visit from Iolond. As Elathera slowly suffocates with explosions of unknown colors around her, she earns her flame.
I chit chat with Iolond, managing to learn that these voids are physical manifestations of it. Poor Elathera has now violated my god twice and Iolond isn't exactly thrilled about it. The glass rooms are actually Lucky's trial, but they step back out the minute things get traumatic. Another failed trial until we guilt trip them into seeing it through. The next time they emerge, they're profusely sobbing and in need of comfort, but they finally have their flame. It's Rikius' turn, so we backtrack to a fountain of ladybugs he tried to shake off earlier. He's trembling at the thought of having to go into that room, but does so anyways. He meditates beside the fountain, closing his eyes in time to avoid the visual horror of hundreds of bugs crawling all over him. A flame appears above his head, sending the ladybugs scattering before his eyes open.
It's all up to Jordeira to conclude the Trial of Darkness and he is doing everything he can to put it off. At this point, he'd rather fight the minotaur. We reach the room of creepy statues and he urges Industria to shove him inside. She does so and he begins to hear familiar whispers in abyssal. They tell him how he'll never escape their clutches, that he'll always belong to them. He reluctantly sits before one of the statues, the whispers now telling him to sacrifice his friends. Despite his fear, he declines, earning a sword right through his ribs. He's overtaken by blinding pain and earns his flame. We're not immediately teleported from the labyrinth, so with more wandering, we find a mysterious pit in the closet. We throw ourselves down and are met with a raging blizzard.
We've now entered the Trial of Cold...
#adventures of the volunteer fire department#oc: zakina kociak#oc: jordeira ferus#game: pathfinder crusades#this one is l o n g#but there's a lot to cover here
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NATALIA DYER / DEMI GIRL — don’t look now, but is that philomena carmichael i see? the 19 year old wildlife science student is in their sophomore year and she is a rochester alum. i hear they can be whimsical, patient, apathetic and unpredictable, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet she will make a name for themselves living in garcia row. ( james. 20. est. she/they. )
like this to plot !!
TW CANCER, TRAUMA, DEPERSONALIZATION / DEREALIZATION DISORDER ( ALT. MENTAL HEALTH ) / DEATH / DECAY / MAGGOTS / GROSS ??
a e s t h e t i c s
wildflowers in your hair and bare feet against moss, binoculars and maps, madonna beating out of half-dead speakers in a half-dead van, whipping wind, jumping off cliffs and rolling down hills, a bandaid wrapped around each finger, cryptic bumper stickers and cryptids in the woods, facing the sun and letting the rays hit you, counting stars late into the night, mismatched socks and lucky ribbons, hoarding a box of special treasures, shoplifting and diner-dashing, bleach against roots, pink sweaters paired with ripped fishnets and slip dresses with knock off uggs, willingly wearing crocs, glitter stickers.
general info !!
full name: philomena brontë carmichael
nickname(s): philly, phil, mena, etc.
b.o.d. - april 20th lmao !!
label(s): the amaranth, the halycon, the neophyte, the wanderer, etc. etc.
height: 5′4″
hometown: woodside, ca
sexuality: ??? $500 ebay mystery box. pansexual if you had to label it.
pinterest
stats
biography !!
a middle child belonging to christopher and imogen carmichael - two stanford professors. christopher specialized in british literature whilst imogen specialized in the classics. hence the name.
the order of siblings goes as such: lysander, elektra, juno, philomena, and twins orion & valora. the deal was that everybody had a greek (or in juno’s case, roman) first name and a middle name inspired by a piece of british literature circa 1800s and under. a family of nerds, if you will.
so, clearly - right off the bat, their parents are … eccentric. they’re both in love with their respected topic, and with each other, and with their kids. the carmichael family is a happy family.
they each have their own quirks and whatnot - though philly’s always been particularly dreamy - even as a child, she’d spend hours watching clouds or caterpillars or the leaves blow in the wind rather than play with other kids. she wasn’t a shy kid - she just had her own interests.
hardship doesn’t hit the family until philomena is five and starts having splitting headaches. they’re slow at first - but as soon as she’s seeing spots and unable to walk in a straight line, doctor appointments are made.
it doesn’t take long for them to discover the tumor, though the official diagnosis of malignant ependymoma comes a month later.
it’s grade ii but slow-moving, small enough to not be as much of a threat as worried, but big enough where removal is necessary. philomena earns a scar and brings it in for show-and-tell. for two months afterwards, philly’s at radiotherapy monday through friday.
they’re lucky - philomena’s considered cancer-free by the next year. she’s babied at first - handled delicately, as if she could break if touched - but with five other children … it doesn’t last for too long.
and life continues as normal.
her personality doesn’t shift much over the next few years - she’s awfully independent for a kid, and awfully quiet - when she speaks it’s about faeries and bigfoot, about how the sky is so blue and if you listen quietly, you can hear the leaves whisper their secrets to each other. this is not odd.
she’s close to all her siblings, but she idolizes her older sister - elektra. elektra’s six years older and dyes her hair whatever colors she wants. elektra bought a knife off a seedy guy downtown. elektra threw away all of her heels and renounced god. elektra is god. her music is loud but it’s not heavy - it’s florence and the machine.
they’re opposites - elektra’s boisterous and feels loudly, philomena’s softer and feels…less. when elektra sneaks out, philomena keeps watch. they are a duo.
philomena is smart - but she’s fifteen and hates school. hates sitting inside all day. hates the same routine - day after day - it’s all the same. her parents’ routine is the same, philly feels contained and she wants to live.
elektra’s twenty-one and just bought a brand new spanking (used but not falling apart) 19-something volkswagen … van - using her entire savings account. she says she’s tired of routine, she’s leaving the next day.
naturally, philomena stows away in the back and isn’t discovered until they’re two states away and she’s got to pee. elektra nearly crashes the van in shock.
it’s an argument - philomena vs. elektra, then them vs. their parents, then their parents vs. the school, the state - it’s an ordeal. philomena switches to an online program in the end.
it hurts christopher and imogen - lysander’s not having any of their nonsense, juno’s betrayed and alone - the twins are twins. in the end, it’s alright. the carmichael family is a happy family.
philomena and elektra take their time - it’s not a road trip, it’s their new life, permanently on the road. they stop and explore often - they do odd jobs in whatever town they settle in. they dine-n-dash, they shoplift. they survive in their own way.
during particularly desperate times, they two resorted to identity theft & credit fraud - getting away with it only by ditching the cards once they’ve made it out of state.
she drops out of high school officially when she’s seventeen - they have to drive all the way back to california to deal with the wrath of their parents and to deal with paperwork, but it’s done. philomena doesn’t know what path she wants in life - but it’s not that.
it’s during this time that the episodes occur - philomena’s outside her body, philomena’s wrapped in cotton, her memories are not her own. she’s looking in the mirror and she doesn’t recognize herself. they take shelter in a city for six months, long enough for her brand spankin’ new therapist to figure out what’s wrong with her. she’s diagnosed with depersonalization / derealization disorder - they think it’s stress. philomena doesn’t get stressed. they think it’s trauma. she laughs - she never laughs.
she gets medication, and life is normal.
three years later and her parents want philly to have a higher education - desperate for it, really - worried for her future. it’s a battle that she loses, getting her GED and applying to a local college in a town halfway across the country.
staying rooted pains her - pains elektra, stuck in a midwest state for no good reason. by the summer before her sophomore year, philly deides to transfer to lockwood. elektra can travel up and down the eastern coast and philly goes too, sometimes, on the weekends. it’s a compromise that favors her parents’ wants above all.
school has caused philly’s disorder to flare up - a small rift in her day-to-day life even when she doesn’t realize it.
things were fine for a while - they have to be fine, because philly is always fine - because elektra is always fine, because they’re always fine and happy and content with their situation. but years of negligence had caught up with philly - and now she’s not quite sure what to do.
it began with a phone call from juno - angry juno, hurt juno - juno who has called every week for four years and has only gotten a handful of answers - and many, many handfuls of answering machines. juno who doesn’t understand why philly is like this - when she’s so hurt, all the time - when things are so much, all the time. the call ends with a reminder that they are the same - that they’ve experienced the same thing, the same thing that nobody else in their family had experienced.
juno, of course, refers to the dead body in the woods nine years ago.
to backtrack - philomena was ten and juno was thirteen when they had decided to go on a hike - a nearby trail that had been walked countless times, in a town they’ve always felt safe in. it should’ve been safe - it should’ve been fine. but philomena liked going off the trail, making her own - insisted on it, in fact. she was the one who skidded down the slope first, curiosity drawn to a dirty, fraying red scarf - but juno had been the one who had tripped and fallen, who had landed besides decaying flesh and maggots. philomena had seen the body first - but juno had touched it. juno had touched it.
after the police and the sirens and the years of therapy, juno had always wanted to talk about it - always wanted to address it, vent to the one person who would maybe, could maybe, understand. philly had already blocked it out of her mind.
back in present day - the phone call with juno had attracted elektra, who then in turn called juno and marched away, screaming match from across the country (supposedly). philly, always a little too curious, had only overheard parts of their argument. but she heard the one thing that left her bothered - a rare experience, and a sickening one. elektra had called her a child. just a kid, to be exact.
philly had stopped considering herself a child when she turned eighteen - and she certainly never thought she acted childish. confrontation led to a rift, and philomena determining that they needed time apart - that elektra should go, now, please. and she did. and philly was alone. no elektra, no florence - no more depending on her sister, just philly. alone.
a firm week before dean lockwood was murdered and the rochester students moved to huntington beach, philly had disappeared. run away, if you will. no driver’s license, just a handful of cash and her ‘pets’ set free. she’s just now reappeared, with a van she has no registration for parked outside of garcia row & in front of their new ‘dorm’.
personality !!
she’s quiet but she’s confident - her voice sounds like rustling leaves, if leaves smoked a pack of cigarettes a day.
often underestimated - philly’s petite and looks like she’d fall over if a plastic bag blew too close to her. she’s independent - for the most part. elektra is the only person philly takes orders from.
has always been considered odd - weird, strange. still talks about the trees as if they’re listening, as if they’re old friends. she’s vague and doesn’t elaborate on the things she says.
believes in pretty much any superstition you throw her way. luck is very important to her. if you ask her if the earth is flat, she’ll say probably. believes strongly in bigfoot and the lochness monster. has personally seen aliens, and loves ghosts almost more than herself.
she can be amusing - whether you ‘get’ her or not, her outlook is often bright - she talks about the negatives the same way she talks about the positives. can be seen as naive or gullible, but she’s plenty smart. even if half of her education has come directly from google.
philly doesn’t laugh. a smile, yes - often, in fact - not always reaching her ears, or bearing teeth - but these are not indicators of her happiness. philly is consistently content. she thinks many things are funny - she still will not laugh.
her voice is often monotonous - she doesn’t sound dreary, she sounds far-away. her voice carries. her emotions are often unknown to others.
is apathetic in most situations. she’s hard to bother - she’s incredibly patient and enjoys the company of most - tolerates them at the very least. it’s hard for her to express her emotions, because she feels them so little that it’s very nearly not worth it. her affection is not verbal - it’s small touches and gestures of kindness, love in her own way.
is a fan of knock-knock jokes and bad puns. she won’t crack a smile while telling you them, nor does she expect you to laugh. she just enjoys them.
she owns a motorola razr covered in puffy stickers - hasn’t ever had a smartphone. she’s a fan of emoticons. her favorite is :o)
has a lot of bruises and scratches and scars - she’s often getting herself into pickles. there are always, at the very minimum, three bandaids on each hand.
she has insomnia, so she’s awake often. is often seen wandering town - even when she shouldn’t be, even when it might be dangerous. her intuition is delayed. when she does sleep - her dreams are vivid and fantastical.
keeps a box of memories - sentimental bits and pieces she’s picked up over the last few years. there are a lot of buttons and postcards, but any teeny tiny object will do.
her style changes every week - most, if not all, of her clothes are thrifted. one week she’s baby spice and the next she’s lydia deetz. she combines pieces from different styles often - she looks like a barbie clothed by a child. she feels most comfortable like this.
will either patch-up the clothes that get too worn or reuse them in some way. sometimes donates the clothes she gets tired off - isn’t minimalistic, but she’s learned to keep only a small amount of possessions.
the only consistency is her lucky ribbon - it’s pastel yellow and silky and as thin as a shoelace. she ties it onto her outfit of the day, everyday. if she loses it, she’s lost. elektra has a matching ribbon.
has no problem with minor theft - she only takes bare minimum, puts herself and elektra first and that’s how it’s always been. she tries to be good while in rochester - would hate to make enemies whilst florence is getting repaired.
currently living in audax while elektra stays in their van, florence - sometimes philly stays there during the weekends.
they used to live in motels on the occasion, the cheapest room, and more often than not they’d both go home with strangers for a comfier bed and a hotter shower.
it was a common occurrence - she didn’t sleep with them - but somehow, she weaseled her way into their homes anyway. has come out mostly unscathed, on most occasions. this has been a practice ever since they’ve been on the road.
really, truly - has not slept with anybody, had her first and only kiss at thirteen with a frog. this doesn’t bother her.
will consume a n y t h i n g you put in front of her - isn’t picky.
listens to whatever they’ve picked up along the way but she likes instrumentals the best. her second favorite genre is 1990′s and 2000′s top hits. they’re nostalgic for her.
loves storms - will go out in the rain and will risk her life for it.
owns a pair of roller-skates and is often skating rather than walking. unless she’s on grass - then she’s walking barefoot.
has many hobbies, and gets bored of them often. her favorite hobby is welding. she’s not certified.
also, juggles.
also, accordion.
the kind of girl who’ll do any job you give her. odd jobs are her favorite jobs. babysitting is her least favorite - but she does it anyway. has lost children before. have they ever been found? not by philly.
dyes her hair blonde often and cuts her own hair - bangs included - finds it cathartic, likes the itchiness of bleach.
everything she does is often in pursuit of feeling free, alive, and meaningful.
wanted connections !!
random encounters - she’s new to rochester and doesn’t know many people - if anybody at all, so :-)
alternately, people she’s run into with elektra during their journey. whether they’ve stolen from them or stayed with them somewhere or just, ate dinner with them. anything.
someone whose couch / floor she’s crashed on after a night of whatever - a party, adventure, etc.
people she does jobs for !! people who commission her to make stuff for them. people who need a babysitter.
people who think she’s weird - and those who like it. or those who hate it. people who don’t understand her - people who do, in their own way.
someone trying to get closer to her but she keeps slipping out from between their fingers.
a parental / older sibling figure !! they take one look at philomena and instantly want to swaddle and protect her.
people who take an immediate liking to her. people who introduce her to the music scene. people who show her around town.
someone who catches her stealing or about to dine-n-dash.
late-night walking pals.
a dealer b/c weed ? a thing.
someone who gets into a debate with her about conspiracies or superstitions or anything !! someone who gets frustrated at her apathy.
somebody who just immediately distrusts her for whatever reason.
??? you don’t have a smartphone ??? cue someone trying to teach her how they work - and philly hating it !!
thrifting pals.
m a y b e a hook-up, eventually, but it’s questionable.
something unrequited, likely on their end b/c philly is … a hard egg to crack.
maybe something returned !! eventually. slowly. slow.
god … someone she just tells her entire life story to. like this meme.
i’m rly down to brainstorm and think of anything !!! dnt forget 2 leave a like :)
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