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bluexiao · 2 years

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#taking off your ring in the middle of a fight

–pretty self-explanatory// this can also mean a promise ring or engagement ring that they gave to you

CHARACTERS. Albedo, Alhaitham, Ayato, Cyno, Diluc, Il Dottore, Kazuha, Scaramouche, Tighnari, Xiao, Zhongli; gn! Reader

THEMES. angst, arguments, slight crack on one of them (guess who), most has no comfort, some has comfort

NOTES. i haven’t been posting multi-hc’s have i? well, here yall go~

ZHONGLI, at first, failed to notice it until he opened his eyes and turned your way.

It was just an argument, all couples do have one. All normal relationships have such situations, after all. Yet it was beyond him to see the band over the table, where you had just been moments ago, only to leave him to ponder with his thoughts all alone.

He quickly turns and follows you to wherever you might’ve gone, “love?” he calls out with a full voice? “Love?” And a broken one after that when he sees you on the bed, folding clothes on your own.

“Are you… leaving?” He hesitated, clearing his throat and prompting you to look up and meet his eyes.

He braces himself for your answer, brave enough to accept your answer, whatever it may be. He wouldn’t stop you—you have every right to leave, after all.

“What? No, of course not, what made you think-” then your gaze trails down to your fingers upon seeing the ring on his palm, instantly reaching out and taking it from him, “Oh-was that? I was only… I took it off because I had to wash my hands to fold the clothes.” You slowly explained, realizing the intention behind his question as you do so.

“Oh, beloved… I am never leaving you,” you stood up and he was the one who stepped forward and received you in his arms, wrapping you and him sighing out heavily once he felt your body against his.

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

XIAO felt the way his knees buckled as he zeroes into your hands, now holding onto the ring that was once wrapped around one of your fingers. That same ring that he had created out of the love from the depths of his heart, a ring that symbolized not only his feelings but also his pledge to never sever the bond you have.

Did you not… want it anymore?

Was the first thought that plagued his mind.

Perhaps… you had finally grown tired of him after all that he has done. After all, who was he to expect you’d always be there for him, when he had clearly not done the same.

He couldn’t really blame you at this point.

He had just ruined the only good thing in his life—and maybe for the better… for you.

Just as he was about to turn around and walk away without a word, he slips back into reality and away from his thoughts on the warmth that attaches itself on his cheeks—a familiar warmth that never fails to pull him out of the darkness and into your presence.

“Darling, shh… what’s wrong? Hey, Xiao? Talk to me, please,” the tenderness of your touch and your soft voice envelops his mind and he couldn’t help but lean into your palm further, placing his gloved hands on top of yours and relishing them on his skin. How they were enough to calm him down makes him even more… greedy—how can he live without you now? The mere thought of it scares him, the old XIAO may not be able to admit it, but the new one after you came into the picture would.

“Please… don’t leave me,” despite this, his words left his lips in a hushed tone, slipping out like a whisper meant for your ears only—his weakness that he never let anyone else see, even his own god.

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

TIGHNARI heard your scoff before he saw it. He frowns at the mere sight of your empty fingers, and the glare that’s ever so present in your face.

He marches forward your way and you stood your ground, ready to be hurt by his usual sharo words only to-

“Are you seriously removing our ring because of a petty argument?”

You immediately glance down and before you can sputter out a response, he takes a hold of your hand and slips the ring back himself, back to where it once was—where it belongs. Once you had glanced at him again, he had this relieved look on his face and the twitching on his ears and tail that you didn’t bother to point out.

Was that… a big deal to him?

Your own harsh words died down before they even got out, realizing that there really was no point to continue it as you heaved out a sigh.

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

SCARAMOUCHE freezes–not literally, but still–and the ice melts almost suddenly, burning with the intensity of his glare.

“And what do you think you’re doing?”

The thing with SCARAMOUCHE is that he takes—he takes what he wants and he will get it either way. With you, he doesn’t understand how you get your way and he becomes pleased with just seeing you smile.

He just wants to see you smile again.

And that ring on your finger.

But both of them are not really present at this very moment.

“You’re just like the others,” he begins to spat when you respond to his question, then he looks away, knowing that you’re going to leave would only make him regret in glancing through your eyes—one that always understood him well, turns out to be just not too different, “You’re going to betray me, after all.”

And now that he said those words aloud it only dawned on him of the intensity the burden was—how much the truth weighed on his shoulders, just like the several other truths he had kept out of the light ever since your arrival.

His shoulders shook and he cursed at the gods once again.

If only… if only he can replace them, and he’ll never have to suffer like this.

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

KAZUHA only got home when it happened.

He left in quite a rush before he sailed off with The Crux, thus leaving you with the argument between the two of you still in the air. And sure, he still did send you letters per usual, the only difference was… you have left him unanswered.

And now that he’s home, he did not know if the sight of the empty house, unopened letters, and the ring left on the counter were something he could have not been surprised with as it was something very expected and reasonable enough.

Feeling stuffy despite the emptiness of the place made him go out and decide to find you. And in his course of doing so, he saw you walking the same way.

“Kazuha… you’re home,” if it were from your displeased tone, he would have already left with the unspoken question answered in his mind. But he stood his ground and made his way towards your form.

“Oh! You found my ring!” You spoke before he can even confront you, and in spite of his surprise upon your actions, upon reaching for your ring, he slips his hands to your waist and wraps your form tightly.

“K-Kazu?” Hearing you stutter even made him more delighted and relieved that his negative thoughts weren’t the reality that he was into.

“I thought you left me… please don’t scare me like that ever again, dove.”

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

“If you are leaving me, you do not need to slip out your ring, you just have to say it out loud. Proclaim it, even!”

IL DOTTORE watches as you looked at him with a bewildered look, eyes wide open and jaw slack, “W-what? I only-“ only for you to purse your lips shut and look away. If you had wanted to say something else, it already flies away like dust and never to be seen again.

“Fine! I am leaving you! Happy now? Well, you certainly would,” there was a venom in your voice that no one around him dares to even whisper a peep about—only you. Only you get to treat him like this and be left unscathed.

Even now.

Even now as he watches you leave and thinks how much your words were very untrue, he can never really admit it out loud, could he?

Certainly not.

He glances down at the ring that once laid very gently on your finger—on your warm skin, and now rests upon the cold ground.

Certainly… not.

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

DILUC had always admired your eyes, your strong gaze that had crumbled the walls on DILUC’s high walls.

“Love…” his hands reached out to you first before you could go and step out, and despite the glare that he received from you, “shall we talk about this first? Please don’t-“ leave me. The words died down as he stared even more into your eyes.

But… you have the right to leave, don’t you?

A voice in his mind told him that he should let go—it was your freedom to break things off with him.

But another voice told him that you were not as unreasonable as that.

Right?

The only problem was which voice he should follow.

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

CYNO failed to process the circumstance as quickly as the others, but as soon as he did, you have already walked out of the room and he was left standing there, with your ring–the ring that he once gave you and had never seen you took off until now–on the bedside table.

A sting on his fingertips as he reached out for the golden band, traveling through his arms and to his chest, where he certainly felt the pang that made his heart almost ache—why so? What does this ring symbolize that he hates seeing it on your fingers and not on his palm?

However, before he could interrogate you, you came back to the room and looked at him with a raised brow, “Why are you staring at my ring like that?” And was the first one to ask the question instead.

He frowns and asks back, “Why did you take it off?’

You sigh heavily and rub your forehead, closing your eyes in frustration, “I’m not in the mood to argue with you again, Cyno. Can you just… give me my ring back? Please?”

Upon sensing your emotions and realizing the situation he wordlessly went and followed what you said, only to take your hand and carefully slide the ring on one of your fingers, feeling the sense of contentment wash through his chest.

You wanted to stay angry at him for not even perceiving his mistake, but the gentle rub of his thumb on your hand made you want to forget it and let it die down…

For now.

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

AYATO was reminded of his oath, the same oath he had declared to you once he had first slipped the ring on your finger.

But seeing you remove it on your own accord made him feel a pang on his chest, almost akin to the one he felt when he first received news of his mother’s death, of his father’s… and now…

He remained silent and for a rare time in his life, he stopped to contemplate. He had always been known for having the mind to make quick but efficient plans, reasons, and words that would not only be able to hide his true intentions but also to force out someone else’s. Being on edge is nothing new to him. Even this relationship was something he had to fight for and survived with his rational mind.

And now, everything crumbles and thaws like thin ice, forcing him in the cold water that he has always been accustomed to but never fully got to soak in. The truth of the inevitable.

Maybe soulmates really were something only her mother and father could have.

Because even if he found you, he couldn’t even make a way to keep you and his oath to you.

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

ALHAITHAM didn’t care about rings at all, not until he had met you and felt the significance of such a thing.

And so, when he saw the ring out of your finger—the same ring that he bought for a ton of Mora that he could have invested on something else but since it was something that your eyes laid upon and brightened over its sight, he still bought it—he knew something had gone wrong.

“Y/n- Sweetheart… let’s talk about this first.”

Of course, he was also thinking about the Mora he spent—only a little… but he also worried what could’ve made oyu possibly react in such a way?

Or is he just… insensitive like you had said? Insensitive enough he could figure out a lot of things but couldn’t figure you out.

Your uniqueness is indeed one of your charms—and his very weakness.

“We shouldn’t break up over this, Y/n-“

“Who said I was breaking up with you?” You bite back, despite accepting the gentle hold of his hand on your wrist.

“Your ring… Why did you- Oh.” He stares dumbfoundead when you began to wipe the band with your clothes and proceed to slip it back.

“What? I wiped it off because I washed my hand.”

“I… I see.” He clears his throat, looking away.

Right. His weakness indeed.

┌───────── · · · · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

ALBEDO would not be as much affected. Of course, he did notice how you took it off and placed it on his laboratory table, before walking off completely. Notice the way your eyes watered and your teeth biting your lower lip in frustration, your heavy breathing and your stifled cries.

He saw them all.

The ring was customary, he had heard it from his colleagues, and indeed, you deserved one—you deserve the best, and he proceeded to give it to you.

But the sight of the ring alone made him realize just how much he had been swallowed by greed. Far too greedy to give you a ring and continue to break his promise nonetheless. Hurting you without meaning to and trapping you in a relationship made of the wholehearted love you give him and the pieces that he decides to give you in return.

ALBEDO wasn’t affected by the ring.

But it did make him realize how much he had affected you.

Reblogs and comments are very appreciated~

#genshin x reader #xiao x reader #kazuha x reader #scaramouche x reader #tighnari x reader #cyno x reader #alhaitham x reader #zhongli x reader #albedo x reader #diluc x reader #ayato x reader #dottore x reader #blue’s works

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rassicas · 1 month

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hi guys! im back. i went tokyo for a few days. got back at 7 this morning after taking an overnight 7 hour bus ride.... that i did not sleep on bc i cant sleep in moving vehicles. this will be something closer to a proper blog post i guess. splatoon related convention? experience below

i've kept my mouth shut about my plans to go because its not as well known on the english side of the fanbase and i didnt wanna make people too jealous sorry LOL , but i went to splaket 22! it's an unofficial, splatoon-only doujinshi market/artists alley. this was my first convention-sort-of event ive been to since i was... in high school. i also dont really get to meet many other hardcore splatoon fans irl. i was nervous about it because i don't know a whole lot of people on the JP side nor do i have a lot of confidence in my japanese speaking/listening, but in the end it was SUPER fun. i wish i couldve talked a bit more to the artists i did encounter to comment on what i liked about their works but. Skill Issue very few non-japanese people at this event of course but one of the only english speakers i saw i called out to bc they were wearing a shirt with this exact image printed on it no video and no photos outside of designated areas were allowed so i got like. zero pics of my own. but there was a lot of cosplayers i saw! oh and here's the Loot Haul. a few doujin, a clear file, stickers, microfiber cloth and a keychain. im surprised at how little i got, i think i shouldve gone a bit crazier with it

the one with Tao Blu and oonie in the top left (by sachikazerick) I came across by chance and bought because it was cute, featured splatband characters, and also because it all in some familiar inkling language (the last point of which i told the artist as i was buying) when i finally got home and saw the back credits...

SMALL FUCKIN WORLD LOL (i tweeted at the artist afterwards to let him know i came by the table and to thank him for using me and my friend's inkling language fonts!) though truly, i think ardnin deserved the credit more rather than me since he made most of those fonts! ah well, still cool to see more and more fan works using deciphered inkling language. top middle book is a story with some salmonid characters that i havent read yet but im looking forward to it, the art is lovely. top right one was the first thing i bought. the artist is rk_splaworks, whose art i love, and we've been mutuals for a few years and have talked a bit here and there! i was so fucking nervous to meet them in person since my japanese sucks LMAO but they were happy to meet me too and we got a selfie together yippy <3 also havent read their doujin Yet since ill have to rub all my brain cells together and huddle over the dictionary, but i want their oc lore

ok that's all i'll say, next splaket is...june 22. very soon....im already thinking ill. go again. yknow. while im still in japan and all that. i guess ill have to study harder on my jp in the meantime teehee ...i doubt it, but in the off chance anyone following me is going to the next splaket in june lemme know!

#much of this is me cross posting my tweets from the past few days and then some #rassicas speaks #ive forgotten to make a tag for my non-ask original posts so i guess thatll be it #anyway ill get to work on translating that famitsu interview teehee

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dominos-palast · 11 months

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Lessons on flirting

Fandom: XMen

Pairing: Kurt Wagner x fem!reader

Characters mentioned: Scott Summers, Jean Grey, Peter Maximoff

Used Pronouns: (she/her)

Warnings: none

Request: yes

Part: 1/3

A/N: I made an exception and did a fem!reader one since it was requested like that. I will eventually upload a gn!reader version

P.S.: I decided to split the request into 3 because I wanted to post something since it’s taking longer than promised :’)

Summary: Kurt has a crush on one of the best fighters in the institute, but doesn’t know how to approach the situation. Thank goodness that Peter and his friends are there to support him.

Word Count: 1k

“I did not get my ass whooped.” Scott walked between Jean and Kurt, trying to defend himself from Jean’s accusations.

“Of course not. How could you ever? We all know how strong the great Scott Summers is.” Scott would have felt flattered by such a response if it weren’t for the sarcasm behind her words.

“Yeah, yeah. Keep making fun of me. As if you had done it better,” he said eyeing the ice pack Jean pressed to her shoulder, only gaining a slight strong nudge on his bruised arm.

Kurt couldn’t help but snicker at their bickering. They had been on it since their last class. The topic had been self-defence. The catch: The use of powers was strictly prohibited. This type of class had become more frequent since the rumours of a new power suppressant circulating in the black market started. The professor wanted all students to be able to defend themselves, with and without powers.

“You sure can laugh,” Scott glanced at Kurt. “We aren’t allowed to use our powers, but you still can use your tail to fight.”

Kurt smiled proudly and swung his tail from side to side, mocking him even further.

“These classes are stupid. I have literal lasers for eyes. I can fry anyone even miles away from me. Why should I train in close combat if no one can get close to me anyway?” Scott let himself fall on the couch, resting his feet on the table in front of him. Jean already knew it was his frustration talking. They all had been lectured enough to understand why such classes were necessary.

Jean followed Scott’s lead and made herself comfortable beside him. Kurt leaned against the armrest of the couch.

“He indeed has an advantage, but I wasn’t expecting him to be that good.” She directed her eyes toward Kurt “You put up a pretty good fight against her, considering she is top of the class,” said Jean approvingly.

Kurt’s eyes suddenly lit up, and he turned toward them.

It was clear to him who she was talking about.

You hadn’t been in the institute for long but you managed to make a name for yourself right away. You hadn’t lost a spar in the self-defence class until now, making you one of the strongest fighters in the class.

“But how come she’s so strong? Does she have enhanced strength or something?” asked Scott raising an eyebrow.

“No. Her power is to transform drawings into solid objects,” Kurt responded.

Jean nodded and added, “I saw one of the spars she had with an older student. She pulled out a literal sword from the tattoo on her arm and beat his ass right in front of everyone. But do you know why she really is so strong?” Scott looked up at Jean’s questions with expectancy. “It’s because she is not a couch potato. Unlike you, Scott”

Scott threw a pillow at her, which she quickly stopped with her telekinetic powers.

The conversation went on with more complaints and remarks about the self-defence classes.

Kurt's mind drifted away, thinking of today’s class. More specifically the spar you had with him.

The first time he met you was in the self-defence class where he has been witness to your many wins. He has seen how graciously you can move and how powerful every single punch of yours is.

His admiration for you grew further and further from that day on. Not only because of your abilities but also because you remained humble and kind instead of letting your accomplishments get to your head. You were someone Kurt looked up to because you didn’t simply knock your opponent down. You gave hints and advice on what the correct stance is, how to throw a proper punch and so on. After every spar, you helped your opponent up and cheered them up like a football team’s coach would do. And you did exactly the same thing with Kurt after sparring with him.

He had lasted longer than the majority of the students you had gone against, but you still managed to make him eat dust. He lay on the ground as you approached to lend a hand. Kurt noticed your hand and was about to accept your help, but then hesitated. He was sure you would feel uncomfortable, considering Kurt’s unusual handshape. But to his surprise, you grabbed his hand and pulled him onto his feet. He felt his cheek burn when he noticed the short distance you had between each other, but you kept your grip on his hand. The words you said stuck to Kurt like glue: “That was amazing. Just as expected. We have to repeat this sometime soon”. That along with your beautiful, bright smile made his heart beat unusually fast.

“Earth to lover boy, are you listening?”

Kurt turned his head toward Scott and Jean. Both were staring at him with sneaky smiles on their faces.

“Entschuldigung?”, asked Kurt clearly confused.

Jean and Scott exchanged glances in amusement.

“You’ve been smiling like an idiot since we mentioned her”, Jean said raising her eyebrows.

Kurt felt his cheeks grow hotter. “Oh, I was thinking of- you know, class- I mean-”

“Dude, it’s so clear you have a crush on her. You drool every time she is near,” Scott said rolling his eyes.

“It’s not like-”

“You have a crush on her” Kurt yelped at the sudden presence behind him, teleporting onto the spot between Jean and Scott on the couch on reflex. “Like, totally obvious” Quicksilver took a long sip from his apple juice, only to look disgusted at it. “What’s the expiration date on this?”

“I didn’t- I didn’t realise.” Kurt looked worryingly at Peter. “Do you think she noticed? Oh no, what if I weirded her out?”

“Well, only one way to find out.”

Everyone stared at Peter expectantly as he sipped his juice with risen eyebrows.

------- Part 1/3 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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aicosu · 8 months

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Guys, I hate to do this.

Any of you who know me in any circle know that I'm a very professional, very private lady who hates any sort of disc horse breeds that might give me a headache. But this one is important, and my goal here is the integrity and reputation of artists.

For my credentials: I have been a part of five zines in the past. Two I moderated, and one I ran, created, laid out, printed, and shipped in its entirety.

So anyway:

HELLCHEER ZINE BULLSHIT

I joined Hellcheer and the Kindred Freaks Zine very late. Well, after sign ups, check-ins, etc. I saw it was happening in april-ish and shot a DM to the twitter to join. I did both a full art page and a cosplay page.

At the time, the server was quiet but kind. We got updates on the number of orders and books being made.

@Lawless is the runner of the Zine. They created and organized it. They are in charge of the main emails, the selling website, the orders, the shipping, and the funds. (To be clear, this level of sole responsibility is not ABNORMAL in a zine. And is not always an issue.)

@Valerie is the 'social media' mod. They are in charge of managing announcements and answering questions on Twitter and Tumblr. Please keep in mind: No one wants anything but a fast and easy recovery for both Lawless and their mother. Medical emergencies, heck—LIFE happens. It's always okay to put a hiatus on anything, even product with money, in order to take care of yourself and family. Every single contributor only wants them to be clear in what they need and how we can help.

So lets break down what's happening.

Back in May, Lawless went radio silent on the status of books and merch coming in. Another contributor and I, @Toguchin, start dming Lawless to make sure everything is on track. They come back after a week and apologize for being MIA, explaining that their mom got sick. We thank them for all their hard work and wish them and their mom well.

On July 15th, after contributors and customers inquire on delays to meeting the announced shipping deadline, Lawless makes a twitter post saying shipping has started and contributor copies will be happening. They proceeded to go MIA from the server discord and have been since.

The following week, contributors and customers discover that shipping HAS NOT started. Labels have been created and printed, but nothing appears to be in transit at all.

Toguchin and I started getting reached out to by customers worrying their packages are lost. We report this to the zine server to NO RESPONSE. Except @Ashlee, the discord mod who also has heard nothing.

July 20th to 22nd with customers complaining and theorizing a scam in mind; Toguchin and I propose that PDFs be given out to assure and apologize for delays.

We as a server discover a few things: 1. We cannot access the list of buyers at all in order to email apology zines because Lawless did not share the account information with anyone. 2. We cannot access the main email for the same reason. 3. Valerie, the social media mod, deleted discord and distanced themselves from the Hellcheer fandom and has not been checking the Twitter or tumblr, or discord notifications since May.

Ashlee and Ichikun contact Valerie to sign on.

I made a new email and said fuck it, we need to do something to assuage fears, let them send receipts to honor their zines. Valerie didn't know what to post or say or how to answer everyone, so I gave them a copy paste.

Still no words from Lawless but hoping for the best knowing the have a medical emergency, Ashlee and I begin answering the new email for PDFs, but cant help people change addresses or give them any update!!!

Throughout the weeks mods and contributors ping Lawless constantly asking if they need any help! Any help at all, answering emails, changing order addresses, heck a few of us ask if we can pick up the books and packages and ship stuff for them so they can hands off the project and take care of their mom. No response.

We send message after message saying if Lawless can share picture proof, that would be great cause scam theories and chargebacks are starting. BUT ALSO, we let Lawless know we and customers will ABSOLUTELY UNDERSTAND delays if they just communicate it. That if they post in server and on Twitter that shipping needs to wait a month or two, no one will mind. No responses.

July 31, Lawless makes a Twitter update with comments disabled that they are shipping ALL packages that monday with a picture of packages. They also call Valerie privately and tell the issue that USPS refuses to pick up shipments from Lawless has, and they can't leave their mothers side from the post office. They also claim they can only deliver ten packages at a time at the post when they go. *USPS has no such rules. Me and other mutuals who run shops have never had such a problem.

A week later, we realize that customers and our packages are still not in transit. Labels printed only. Most of us assume all packages are just label printed and sitting at Lawless' house.

We beg for updates from Valerie or Lawless. Valerie doubles down on Lawless old reasonings and also officially goes MIA until present day.

Throughout August, USA packages get delivered. A few more updates are made straight to Twitter and Tumblr with comments off. Radio silence in server.

As packages arrive, we all become aware from people's posts and pictures that random Stranger Things Art Stickers are included. No credit to any artist is given? No contributor is responsible for this art. These are suspected to be BOUGHT from Amazon. STOLEN arts amazon sellers resell in packs. NO contributor is okay with this!!! Valerie responds with no response at all.

As of now:

No response to missing digital copies. Ashlee and I cannot give out any without receipts because we have no access to buyers list. Nor can we answer missing packages inquiries cause we have no info. International packages unaccounted for. SCRUNCHIES FREE OR OTHERWISE UNACCOUNTED FOR. Zero word on contributor copies. Zero word on donation status. Zero word on generated profit or book and shipping cost. No way to verify funds at all. No word from Lawless to contributors since July 15. From Valerie since the 31st.

Some notes:

Turning off twitter comments was NEVER what any one of us wanted. A ZINE LAYOUT was never shared. So until people had them in hand or in PDF none of us realized that the credits DO NOT POINT TO ANY SOCIAL MEDIA. All of our usernames are handle-less? This was extremely disappointing. This one matters to me: Our FanEdit artist was not aware their work was not getting a full page. Again no pre-layout was shared. So their work is tiny and in the margins of the front and back. That's not okay. All of us wanted to help in any way we could. NONE of us doubt Lawless intentions or emergencies. But lying, misleading, non-communicating and turning off comments are all things we did not consent to. All of us only wanted a cordial, honest response. None of us actually cared about delays as much as we did communications. There has been many noticeable times Lawless has been online, posting privately or otherwise, even active on Discord and has not reached out.

Why make a post:

Customers should know contributors fought for them. That we did everything we could and our reputation as artists in the fandom shouldn't be tarnished cause two creators decided to disappear. Contributors should get their copies. Many of us BOUGHT bundles. I've been in five zines and every single one gave out free contributor copies WITH merch!!

I'm also attaching all server screenshots for integrity. I'm in half a mind to release the zine PDF publicly, for free, for everyone at this point. I personally think it's only fair since many are still missing just that. But I do not want to insult anyone who paid for just the PDF regardless of the potential contribution to charity. But it's really up to customers, not me.

#hellcheer #hellcheer zine #kindred freaks #fucking sucky ass post to make

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lanadelnegan · 7 months

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My Past, My Future - Part 5 (Final part)

Negan x Reader x Daryl

part four here / part one here

Warnings: 18+, smut, angst

Note: I'm sorry this took so long for me to post. Been kinda out of it lately, but probably gonna start posting regularly again.

Red = Negan / Blue = Daryl / Pink - Reader

"Negan..." Your jaw lowers slightly in disbelief as you look up into his tired eyes. Before your brain has time to stop you, you lunge forward, wrapping your arms around his neck and inhaling the familiar smell of him. "God I am so glad you're okay." A tear falls from your cheek as he nuzzles his face into the side of your neck and holds you tight.

Pulling back slightly after a moment too long, you clear your throat awkwardly and drop your hands to your sides. You quickly wipe the tear slipping down your cheek as Negan tilts his head at you empathetically. "Baby.."

"No..." You shake your head, remembering how Negan left you - alone and worried to death. "Negan, I - I don't understand. Why? Why did you leave?" You ramble, letting the hurt and anger wash over you all over again. "I looked for you for three weeks straight. I didn't eat.. didn't sleep.. just cried until I couldn't anymore."

"I saw you two.. kissing.. I thought -"

"You thought wrong, Negan. I wanted it to be you. I told Daryl that after the kiss. I came back to Alexandria that night to tell you, and you - you were gone. How could you do that to me? Just leave and not even look back like I never meant anything to you?"

"C'mon, You know that's not true... Was I supposed to just stay there and fuckin' watch you be with him?!"

Before you can respond, the front door swings open behind you and Daryl quickly appears at your side, wrapping his arm protectively around your waist.

Negan scoffs, glancing down at Daryl's hand gripping you possessively. "Seriously? You two are a thing now, huh? And you expect me to believe you were gonna fuckin' choose me?"

"Believe what you want. It's the truth. Not that it matters anymore. You left. You made your decision."

"Yeah." Negan nods. "I guess you did too."

"You dunno what the hell you're talkin' about. Got no right to talk to her like that when you just up and left." Daryl's jaw clenches as he glares at Negan.

"Seems like it worked out for you. I dunno why you're fuckin' complainin'."

"Cuz I'm not selfish. I wanted her to by happy."

"And I'm selfish? For leaving behind the love of my fucking life just so I wouldn't get in the way of her and another man!? If anyone's selfish it's you! Throwing a fit because the girl you were too scared to admit your feelings to wanted me and not you."

You grab Daryl's wrist, pulling him back as he lunges forward at Negan. "Enough! This is too much. I can't - I can't deal with this right now." You cry as both men reach out to comfort you.

Negan lets out a long sigh. "Look, it's getting dark. And I know you're tired. Let's call it a night and sort this out tomorrow."

Daryl hesitantly nods, accepting Negan's offer when you look to him for an answer and you both follow Negan into the house. It's old and wooden and Negan's smell fills the air. Your heart aches at the thought of Negan here by himself all this time... he is here by himself right?

"Do you.. live here alone?" You ask, looking around for any signs of other company.

"Nah. Girlfriend should be back any minute."

You roll your eyes at the teasing tone of his voice, trying to hide your smile when he winks at you.

"Hungry?" He points behind himself to the kitchen.

"No.. thanks. Just tired."

"You two can take the bedroom.. I'll sleep out here on the couch. Just let me clean up and change first." Negan says before heading to his bedroom. "Make yourselves at home." He calls out before shutting his door.

Six months ago you were confessing your love for each other and having sex on your couch. Now he's offering up his bed to you and another man? Daryl rests his hand on your lower back and you turn around to hug him, laying your head on his chest.

"Daryl.. I want you to know you have nothing to worry about. We'll leave in the morning."

"Not worried." He reassures you by planting a gentle kiss on your forehead. He knows he is, but the last thing he wants is to put more stress and pressure on you right now.

Negan enters the room again, announcing his presence with an awkward clearing of his throat. "Room's ready. Changed the sheets."

Daryl leads the way, bumping past Negan rudely as he disappears into the master bathroom. You walk past Negan, brushing your hand against his before he gently wraps his hand around your wrist and looks down at you. "The idea of you in my bed with another man fucking infuriates me. Everything I do.. everything I did.. was for your happiness. Not mine... Just so you know." His hazel eyes fall to your lips for a moment before he slowly looks back up into your eyes. You restrain yourself from kissing him, remembering the way his soft lips felt against yours as his stubble pricked at your face. You can't deny you miss kissing him. Having long deep conversations with him.. Fucking him. All your memories together flow through your mind as you stare up at him.

"Are you happy with him, y/n?" Negan's eyes dart back and forth between yours.

"...Yes."

"Good..." He nods before walking away and you watch him sink to the couch as you enter his bedroom. You find Daryl already laying in bed and immediately climb in the bed behind him to comfort him. You know this must be difficult for him. You nuzzle your face into the back of his neck. "Baby.. I told you not to worry."

He doesn't say anything as you run your fingers comfortingly through his thick strands of hair. "I love you, Daryl."

"You love him too." He says matter-of-factly.

You don't respond, knowing you'd be lying if you tried to argue with him. So instead, you wrap your arm around him and settle into the sheets. The pillowcase smells like Negan as you shut your eyes and drift off quickly, dreaming of a world where you don't have to choose between the two men you'd die for.

As soon as Daryl hears your light snore, he slips out of bed, quietly finding his way into the living room where Negan is wide awake on the couch staring at the ceiling.

"We need to talk."

Negan's chest rises and falls as he lets out a long sigh. "Nothin' to say."

"Oh.. now you wanna stay quiet?"

"Now you wanna fuckin' talk?"

Daryl ignores Negan's comeback, sitting in a chair across from the couch. A long moment passes before Daryl finally speaks again.

"I know you love y/n. I know you've changed. But I'll never forget what you've done. When we came back to Alexandria and realized you were gone... I hoped you'd never come back."

Negan huffs, leaning back further into the couch before Daryl continues.

"Until I saw how much it broke her. She wouldn't eat. Wouldn't sleep. Unless I made her. Was so worried about her I couldn't let her outta my sight. You did that to her."

Negan gulps down, fighting back tears as he hears how much he hurt you.

"And for some stupid reason.. she still loves you."

Negan scoffs, shaking his head slightly before gazing back up at the ceiling. "...When Lucille passed, I knew I wouldn't be able to love anyone the way I loved her. Lucille was.. my everything. Hell, named a fuckin' baseball bat after her just so I wouldn't have to say goodbye... You know where that bat is now?"

Daryl grunts, waiting for Negan's answer. Negan's head nods towards the fireplace, as they watch the wood crack underneath the flames for awhile.

"I said goodbye to Lucille that day because I finally found someone I could be happy with again... When I made the decision to leave, that was for y/n. Not for me. I knew you'd be there to take my place, and I thought that's what she fuckin' wanted. But me? I didn't eat either. Didn't sleep. Worried about her every day. Still fuckin' do."

Daryl's head drops forward as his elbows rest on his knees, carefully taking in Negan's words.

"She misses you."

"Why are you tellin' me this?"

"Cause I want the same thing as you. Just want her to be happy."

"So what? You're.. giving her back to me?" Negan's head shakes sarcastically, mocking the idea.

"In your dreams.... What I'm sayin' is, we love her and she loves us. Why make her choose?"

Negan's nose scrunches as he looks to Daryl, sitting up now and leaning forward. "Wait, wait, wait. You're not serious. Are you seriously suggesting a... throuple?"

"Nah. I ain't gay." Daryl grunts. "It's not about me and you. Just her."

"Too bad. Thought you were finally comin' around." Negan raises his brows suggestively, making Daryl stand and roll his eyes annoyed. He stops at the bedroom door, looking back to Negan expectantly. "You comin'?"

They both quietly enter the bedroom and slide in bed on either side of you. Still asleep, you snuggle against the warm body in front of you, roaming your hand along his stomach before stopping suddenly, realizing it's not Daryl. Your eyes jolt open to meet Negan's gaze in the dim lit room as he smirks down at you.

"Wha-"

"It's okay, babe." Daryl whispers in your ear from behind.

"You still love me, baby?" Negan asks, tilting your chin up and hovering his lips over yours.

You answer him by pressing your lips to his, closing the small gap. You can't help the involuntary moan that escapes your mouth as you taste him again for the first time in so long.

Negan's hand cups the back of your neck, bringing you closer as he deepens the kiss and flicks his tongue against yours. His mouth opens slightly as a throaty groan escapes and you almost whimper at how turned on you are. Finally turning your attention to Daryl behind you, your arm reaches behind you to grip his hair and pull him in for a kiss. He kisses you back hungrily as his rough hand glides down the side of your body, tracing your curves before reaching your ass and firmly squeezing.

After a moment, you pull away from his mouth to adjust yourself, leaning up for a moment to remove your shirt and bra before laying flat on your back between the two of them.

You stare vacantly at the ceiling, blinking a few times as you attempt to wake yourself from the obvious dream you must be having. But to no avail, your men remain pressed against your body as they nip at your skin and tease you with their fingers.

Shifting lower in the bed, they both take a hardened nipple into their mouth, making your head push into the pillow below you as you bite your lip to suppress your moan.

Negan flicks his tongue lightly over the sensitive bud, while Daryl's lips suction around the other, sucking over and over. You can't hide your noises anymore as you let them hear what they are doing to you. "Ohh my god. Fuck... that feels good."

Negan grins, letting his teeth gently squeeze your nipple before lowering his hand. He easily pops open the button on your jeans before roughly pushing them down your legs. Daryl raises to his knees, helping you get your pants and underwear off your ankles until you're completely bare in front of them.

You've been with them both one on one on multiple occasions, but this feels.. much more intense with both of them at the same time.

As Daryl bends down, getting ready to position himself to eat your pussy, Negan stops him. "Look man, not tryna be selfish here. But I've been deprived of that pussy for way too long. So please, allow me." He pleads.

Daryl glares at Negan for a moment before finally moving out of his way and letting him devour your cunt. Negan's face is buried between your legs the second Daryl gives him the go ahead and your jaw lowers as you make an o-shape with your lips at how good his mouth feels. His stubble tickles your inner thighs while his tongue repeatedly flicks deep inside of you.

"Fuck!" He comes up for air, before pressing his nose to your hole and inhaling the smell of you. "Goddamn I missed this sweet pussy."

"Move." Daryl demands, taking Negan's place and tossing your legs over his shoulders. His fingers spread your pussy lips apart, allowing him better access to your clit and sucking it harshly, urging you to orgasm.

Your gaze is focused on Negan as he stands by the bed, quickly discarding his clothes.

"Daryl!" You moan his name as your orgasm rushes through you, letting your eyes stay locked on Negan's, hoping to bring out his possessive side. A smirk appears on Negan's face as he chuckles darkly, knowing you're trying to make him jealous.

Just as Daryl comes up for air, wiping your juices from his chin, the bed dips as Negan crawls over you, taking your lips in his.

"You tryin' to tease me, baby? Cause it's fuckin' working."

He kisses you rhythmically before pulling on your lower lip with teeth and grinning at you. While you're busy locking tongues with Negan, Daryl positions himself on his back beside you. "Come mere baby. Need you."

You roll over on top of Daryl, letting your knees rest on either side of him as you hover your wet opening over his hard length and slide down slowly and completely, filling your cunt to the brim as your head falls back in pleasure.

Negan settles in behind you, bumping his hard cock against your ass. His hand wraps around your long strands of hair as he pulls, bringing your head back further and exposing the front of your neck.

Chills run down your spine when Negan whispers throatily in your ear. "Think you can take us both sweetheart?"

You answer him with a frantic nod and he chuckles, biting at the sensitive spot behind your ear and making chills spread over your arms.

"Fuck. Bend over him. Now." Negan grunts, pushing your back until you're laying over Daryl with his cock still inside you.

Negan's hand spreads one of your ass cheeks as he leans back slightly, watching you slide up and down on Daryl's cock. "Goddamn. You are creaming all over his fuckin' dick, darlin'." Negan's thumb reaches out, gathering a line of your juices from Daryl's shaft and bringing it to his mouth. He groans at the taste, eyes rolling in the back of his head as he sucks his own thumb. "Fuck." He whispers, dropping his thumb to your tight asshole now and circling it slowly. "Where do you want me baby?" He asks, pushing this thumb through your tightness. You cry out at the unfamiliar feeling.

"In.. in my pussy." You whine.

"Yeah? Such a big girl, so confident that you can take two big cocks in your little cunt at the same time." Negan chuckles darkly, pulling his finger out of your ass and rubbing his tip through your folds from behind as Daryl's breathes loud and heavy while you ride him.

Negan's hand grips your waist tightly, holding you in place as he guides his cock to your already filled hole. He slides his tip along Daryl's length before ultimately pushing through and burying himself deep inside you. Daryl grunts, adjusting slightly at the feeling of Negan's dick against his own.

You cry out as your walls are stretched further than they've ever been, and the thought of your men rubbing their cocks together inside of you makes your stomach flutter.

"Oh my goddd." You cry, overwhelmed at the intensity of being so full. Not only are your walls stretched to their limit, but both of them are painfully deep. Pressure and heat build in your abdomen as you feel yourself embarrassingly close to coming already.

“Holy shit, feels so fuckin’ good.” Negan whimpers, dropping his head back heavily as he thrusts into you.

Daryl’s jaw clenches as he stares up at you through glazed over eyes. “Is it too much babe? Tell us to stop if you need-“

“No. Please. Please don’t stop.” You beg, crashing your lips against Daryl’s as you moan into his mouth. Negan brings his hand down roughly, smacking your ass cheek and making you yelp into Daryl’s mouth.

Negan grunts, grabbing the back of your hair possessively and pulling your back against his chest. Your head turns as he kisses your lips sloppily from the side, bringing his hand around to wrap firmly around your throat as his throaty whisper flows in your ear. “I might be willing to share, but kissing another man when I’m balls deep in this cunt? Not gonna fuckin’ happen, doll.”

From this angle, one of their tips press repeatedly into just the right spot, making your cheeks burn hot. And Negan’s filthy words are just what you need to send you over the edge.

"Daryl! ... Negan! Fuuuck." You scream out, feeling warm liquid rush out of you. Both men groan at the feeling of you soaking their cocks as Negan's moans become faster and louder and Daryl grows quieter - an indicator that he's close.

"Come in me..Please.” You breathe out.

"Who?" Both men say in unison.

"..Both."

"Can't hold it anymore. I'm comin' baby. I'm fuckin' coming. Ahhh, fuuuuck." He lets out a long groan, spilling deep inside of you.

Daryl groans at the intense feeling of yours and Negan’s warm liquids surrounding his cock. He bites his bottom lip as he shoots his load in you, following each pulse of his dick with a mix of raspy whimpers and moans.

Negan slides out of you as you lift yourself off Daryl, falling to the bed next to him. When Negan joins you on the other side, you lace your fingers in both of their hands as you lay there out of breath.

"What the hell just happened?" You chuckle, not able to hide the ridiculous smile on your face.

"We don't wanna make you choose. Just want you to be happy. If you want us both, you've got us."

"But.. that's.."

Negan leans in, kissing your cheek before settling into the sheets and closing his eyes. "There's no rules in the apocalypse, baby. Shoulda learned that a long time ago."

tagging my babies: @loganlostitall @chaospossum @negansbabydoll66 @redqueenphoenix @n3g5nx @crustyweirdo @youngpersonaathletebear @sadgirlzluvdilfs @ilovebill-and-gustav @neganscumbucket @manipulatorpoem @im-a-goddamn-cat @raininhell @mahogany-cherry-wine @daryldixmedown@munsonslovergirl @sanctuaryforthelost @thelauraborealis @carlgrimesbbg @c3linesworld @blueheisenbergtragedy @dekuumademecumm @midnight-dixon @arthi-s

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polyamorouspunk · 9 months

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Anyone who’s followed me for a while on here knows that I’m the king of not knowing when to keep my mouth shut, so I’m going to try and embrace and talk about something.

So I stepped up my anarchy game last night by, uh, removing a homophobic message, we’ll call it, and I want to use this experience and well as others to talk about some things.

Any anarchy you engage in is going to be terrifying the first time you do it. You will be petrified. You will be paranoid. You will think that the cops are going to come banging down your door or car window even if you didn’t do anything illegal. I’m sure if you’re a black American you already feel this way on a much lower and more frequent level just living day-to-day, but if you’re white and you’re trying out anarchy for the first time you’re going to be terrified because we have ALL been conditioned to think that “when anarchy happens the cops are immediately called”. That’s not true. It can be a bit of a mind-bend to convince yourself that you’re not going to be noticed or found out. There are many posts with tips and tricks to make sure this doesn’t happen, but that’s not what this is. Along that line, people who engage in anarchy are not these fearless people. They are average people like you and me. It’s easy to see people and go wow they’re so brave but there’s a good chance they’re scared shitless. They’re brave because they can override that fear but harness it when needed to complete the anarchistic goals.

If you are in trouble, cut and run, even if you aren’t done. It can be very easy to think “I’m so close! I just need a bit more time!”. Don’t. Don’t take that chance. Leave it. I didn’t finish removing all of the message I found last night, but I started noticing 2 cars circling the streets looking for me, so I wasn’t risking staying there to finish it. Because I decided not to stay and finish what I started I made it home safe. If I had, I could have been caught. In that moment I made a snap decision that said “it’s time to go now” and that was the right decision to make and I stand by it.

Even if you’re work goes unfinished or gets replaced in the line of “anarchies that send a message” it doesn’t mean it wasn’t all for nothing. You sent a message. The homophobic message I removed was replaced right after I took it down. Not sure if it even lasted the night honestly. Meaning no one saw my work except the people who spotted me when I wasn’t quick enough to hide and the people who replaced it, and if it did last the night then maybe the errant person here and there. But what I’m telling myself is that person or persons who put that message up now know someone doesn’t agree with it. Someone willing to stand up to them. To disrupt the status quo. They can no longer think that everyone is going to go along with them putting that message up, because I don’t, and I made that clear by removing it, even if it was only for the briefest of moments.

Don’t push yourself too hard if you have limitations. I pushed myself too hard last night to do this and my body is suffering both last night and all today, and probably at least all tomorrow as well. It was a good effort and I’m glad I did it even though I was freaking out, but as I alluded to in my posts last night, I did trip and fall and sustained some injuries, and also I just pushed my body too much to get the whole thing done. Was it worth it? I’m telling myself it was, because it has to be, because if I tell myself that it wasn’t then what do I have? At least I’m practicing what I preach, and that’s important to me.

Going back to #1 and #3, bigger anarchies are scary, but even if they don’t really work out like you planned, it helps to desensitize you to these kinds of extracurricular activities. The first few times I did my routinely anarchy, I was petrified. Now I hardly even blink (but I’m still careful). Become comfortable but not lax. Become relaxed but not lazy.

Don’t post about your activities directly online. I wouldn’t even recommend making a post like this but like I said I suck at keeping my mouth shut and I’m hopefully being vague enough if anything does come knocking. Take care to clean up after yourself.

#punk culture #okay to reblog

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httplilyyy · 1 year

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𝐈𝐃𝐈𝐎𝐓𝐒 𝐈𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 || 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐇 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐌𝐒𝐎𝐍

pairing: leah williamson x reader

request: ‘hope you’re doing well! i just want to say that i absolutely love your fics and when i saw that your requests were open again i almost screamed bc i have been holding onto this idea just for you. i actually saw this idea on my college love letters instagram page that said “if we're both single by a certain age we will marry each other" is always a fun story concept but it could be even better if the pact is made between rivals (r x leah) as a drunken dare and they go on to sabotage each other's relationships because they've been secretly in love all along.’

summary: you hated each other, right? so why the hell do you want to kiss her?

warnings: swearing (that’s pretty much it)

word count: 3.8k

a/n: i’m alive mfs, i kinda changed the request a little but i hope that’s alright. let’s also ignore the fact that this is my first post of 2023 and it’s march also a huge thank you for 850 followers :)

woso masterlist

Your fingers tapped absentmindedly on the glass in your hand. The smell of cheap booze and sweat lingered in the air. Watching as drunken bodies swarmed the dance floor, you leaned your back against the bar.

You don't know how many drinks you’ve had, you didn’t know what was going on, who you were with or where you were. But what you did know was how much you hated her.

You swirled the straw in your glass, watching on as, out of all the clubs in London, she happened to be in the same one as you.

No matter how drunk or sober you were, you always found something in you to dislike every little thing about her.

Whilst some people would call you petty and childish, they didn't know how the feeling was reciprocated.

From the moment you joined Arsenal one thing was made clear. Leah Williamson did not like you. Whatever you did, good or bad, Leah always found something to make her dislike for you more prominent.

At first it was little comments here and there, out of shot from your teammates but it soon escalated into making it her personal mission and life goal to hate you in front of anyone at any time and at any place.

No matter what you did you could never get Leah to like you, so, if you can't beat them, join them.

Every comment leah made, you retaliated and leah didn't like it. Not one bit.

“Of course you're here.” Leah sighed as she stood beside you, ordering herself another drink.

You didnt turn to look at her, your focus still lingering on everyone else. Breathing through your nose, you gave a disgruntled hum with a small nod of your head.

“Not in the talkative mood tonight, y/n?” Leah questioned, a teasing undertone to her voice as she cocked her head to the side, looking at your side profile.

“Nope.” You replied, popping the ‘p’.

“That's unlike you.” Leah said. “Normally you’re going on and on about how much you hate me.”

“Mhm, maybe I've run out of energy.” You shrugged your shoulders, finally turning your head to look at her.

“Woah, who are you and what have you done to y/n?” Leah chuckled, the alcohol definitely present in her system.

“Very funny, good night Leah.” You said, your voice holding little emotion; sounding somewhat like a robot.

You placed your drink onto the bar counter and walked away from the defender; whose eyes stared at your back curiously.

Just as you were about to make your way out of the club, you felt a cold hand grab onto your arm. Turning around, you were met with a, now very noticeable, drunk Leah.

Sighing to yourself, your head dropped to the floor as you tried to regain any type of courage.

“And where do you think you’re going y/l/n?” Leah questioned, her voice coming out slurred.

“Home.” You deadpanned, removing Leah’s hand from your arm.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Leah pondered, eyebrows furrowing.

“A lot actually, I'll be away from you.” You said, giving a sarcastic smile before walking away again.

“Hey! Wait, one dance.” Leah shouted, catching up to you.

“I’m sorry?” You questioned incredulously, turning around to look back at Leah.

“One dance,” Leah pleaded, “and then you can go.”

“No?” You said, chuckling to yourself at how drunk Leah was.

“Come on. Stop being a party pooper.” Leah said, pulling on your arm and the two of you slowly made your way to the dance floor.

“Fine. One dance,” you huffed, giving in, “but that's it.”

A beaming smile took over Leah’s face as she dragged you in between all the bodies that littered the dance floor, planting the two of you right in the middle.

“Kill me now.” You muttered to yourself, standing as stiff as a board, freezing even more when Leah took a hold of your hands and placed them onto her waist.

“Let loose y/l/n.” Leah whispered into your ear before she turned around and started to dance.

Loud music drowned out your thoughts allowing you to forget about everything going on around you.

For a moment you forgot who you were with, what you were doing and where you were, allowing your mind to go somewhere else.

One dance seemed to turn into four and before you knew it you had been dancing with Leah for minutes on end.

Just as you were about to get lost in another dance, a body crashed into yours from behind, snapping you from whatever trace you were currently kept in.

Finally snapping back to your senses, you pulled your hands away from Leah and made your way out of the club, not uttering a single word to the blonde defender rushing behind you.

Letting out an exhale of air once you walked outside you rummaged around in your pockets for your phone only to come up short til you heard your name from over your shoulder.

“Looking for something?” Leah questioned as she walked towards you, your phone in hand.

“How did you get my phone?” You wondered as you tried to reach for your phone but Leah moved it out of your reach.

“That's for me to know and for you to find out.” Leah chuckled as she tapped your phone on your chest.

“Look leah,” you sighed exasperatedly, “just give me my phone, I need to call an uber.”

“How about I propose a deal?”

“I- yeah fine, whatever just give me my phone.” You said, throwing your hands up in the air as your patience grew very thin.

“Let's say I give you back your phone only if you agree to us getting married by a certain age- if we are single of course.”

“No chance.” You laughed, shaking your head in disbelief at the words that just came out of Leah's mouth.

“Fine, I get to keep your phone then.” Leah said, shrugging her shoulders before walking away and down the road.

“Fuck my life.” You muttered, looking up into the sky as your shoulders sagged.

You took one cleansing breath in before shaking your head and running to catch up with a certain blonde defender.

“I’ll do it.” You said, finally catching up to Leah, walking beside her.

“Finally came to your senses have you?” Leah questioned, the teasing tone coming back in full force.

“Don’t. I can't believe I agreed,” you sighed, “can I have my phone back now?”

“One more thing-”

“Oh what now?”

“You give me a ride home too.”

“Yeah, fine, okay.”

After you booked an uber, the two of you waited on the side of the road. You would occasionally turn your head to look at the blonde beside you, noticing that she hugged herself, shivering from the cold.

“Here.” You muttered, handing your jacket in front of Leah.

She looked at you confused for a second, before she gingerly reached her hand out and took the clothing from your hand.

A small ‘thank you’ fell from her lips as she slipped your jacket on, unconsciously pulling the material up to her nose, taking in your perfume that lingered on it.

The two of you didn't have to wait much longer and before you knew it, you were holding a car door open for Leah, letting her get into the uber before you.

The journey to Leah’s was short and the two of you were soon pulling up outside her place.

“Walk me to my door?” Leah asked, a small smile gracing her lips.

“I might as well, huh?” You replied, rolling your eyes although there was no malicious intent behind the action.

Promising the driver you would only be a couple of minutes, you exited the car and walked around to Leah’s side before opening her door. You held out your hand and she graciously took it in hers, pulling herself up and out of the car.

Shutting the door behind her, you walked her up to her front door where you stopped and waited for the blonde to open it.

After a little struggle, Leah managed to get her door open and she stepped into her place, turning around, one hand on the door the other fiddling with her keys.

“You’re a real piece of work, y’know.” You smiled, shaking your head.

“You love me though.” Leah joked, looking at her feet.

“In your dreams,” you laughed, “make sure you have some water and paracetamol in the morning.”

“Awh, you care about me.”

“Piss off, I'm going to be best friends with your hangover in the morning.”

“Yeah, yeah, goodbye y/l/n.” Leah smiled.

“Night.” You said, replying with a similar smile.

Just as you were about to back away from Leah’s doorstep her cold hand grasped your arm again for the second time that night. Stopping in your tracks, eyebrows raised, you wondered what Leah was going to say.

She looked a little conflicted, not knowing what to say so she didn’t say anything, giving you a little peck on your cheek before pulling away and walking back into her place with a smile not leaving her face.

Your eyebrows rose even higher than they were before and you let out a breathy chuckle before making your way back to the uber and back to your place.

The next morning you had training, begrudgingly getting out of bed, you got ready for the day. The journey wasn’t bad, although you felt a headache creeping its way into your head.

Suddenly, you regretted the amount of alcohol you consumed yesterday. You don't remember much from last night, only a few things here and there albeit they were still a little fuzzy.

You soon met up with the other girls and conversed as you walked onto the pitch. Out of the corner of your eye you saw a certain defender who looked like they had been to hell and back.

Letting out a quiet snicker, you walked past her shaking your head with a smile. Leah noticed and sent a sneer your way, not that you cared and that only aggravated her more.

Time went by quickly and before you knew it training had finished. You were walking back to your car when Katie came running up to you.

“Hey y/n!” Katie shouted, causing you to stop in your tracks.

“What's up?” You smiled, turning around to face her.

“Me and a couple of the girls are going bowling later and we wondered if you wanted to come?”

“Yeah, sure. It’s not like I've got anything else to do.” You shrugged.

“Cool, I'll send you the address.”

“Yeah, no problem, see you later.”

It was around six in the afternoon when you pulled your car up to the bowling alley. Getting out of your car you slid your phone into your pocket before walking into the place. You knew immediately where to go from the loud noise coming from a particular group.

Sending them a smile you walked up to them but it soon dropped, not enough for anyone to notice, but it was safe to say you didn't think you were going to enjoy tonight.

Standing next to Beth, Leah was typing away on her phone. Once the blonde looked up from her phone she sent you a look which can only be described as unfriendly. To everyone else, however, they seemed to miss the way the two of you interacted and put you both into a pair.

It was you and Leah, Manu and Viv, Beth and Katie, Lotte and Steph as well as Rafa and Jen. You had very low hopes and you had a strong feeling that instead of hitting the pins Leah may end up hitting you.

Beth and Katie were to go first and it was safe to say that you didn't think they were going to win. Whilst you watched as everyone took their turns you were sat beside Leah. the two of you sitting like statues.

You thought it was because of the hatred Leah had towards you but it was completely the opposite. All the defender could think about was last night, when she kissed you on the cheek.

She didn't know why she did it but it felt right. But she knew it shouldn't have. The fact that it was so wrong was why it felt so right. Leah knew she shouldn't be feeling the way she is but she couldn't help it.

The only reason why Leah acted like she hated you was because she was afraid of getting hurt. Before she could do anything about it she was already too far down the rabbit hole for her to get out.

Leah just had to accept the fact that you’d never like her the way she liked you, and she was fine with having you in her life as an ‘enemy’ rather than not having you in her life at all.

Whilst Leah was so caught up in her own thoughts she missed the way that you looked at her. Like she was the only person in the world. Although you wouldn't tell her that.

The two of you were pining over each other and the only thing stopping you both from telling your true feelings is the fake hatred you had created.

As time went on and as the little arguments grew and grew they turned into true feelings but you never really did hate her. You were using it as a defence system, afraid of getting hurt.

The two of you were so afraid of getting hurt you didnt realise it was already too painful for you both. Too painful to realise you could be together if you weren't stupid. Too painful to realise you were falling and you were falling hard.

It was finally your turn and you stood up, grabbing a bowling ball. You looked back at Leah, searching for any kind of encouragement from her but she was too focused on the floor.

Sighing to yourself quietly, you took a quick cleansing breath and acted as if it was a match final, and you were going to win.

With your first bowl of the evening you managed to get a strike causing an uproar from the girls, snapping Leah from whatever state she was in.

Turning her head towards the noise she noticed you had put the two of you in the lead and she let out a small smile, watching on as you dodged the playful insults being thrown in your way as you sat back beside Leah.

“Guess I won't have a go this round, huh?” Leah said, a small smile gracing her lips.

“Oh, yeah, sorry, my bad.” You replied, scratching the back of your neck.

“We’re winning, it doesn't matter.” Leah shrugged, turning to watch Manu as she bowled.

“Yeah.” You whispered, trying to fight off the smile that slowly crept onto your face.

It was the fifth round when everyone started to get hungry so you volunteered to go and get some food. After asking what everyone wanted you set off to the little snack bar.

“Hey.” You said, walking up to the bar.

“Hey, what can I get for you?” The lady asked, standing behind the counter. You weren't going to lie, she was beautiful but she didn’t come anywhere near to Leah

You told her what everyone had ordered and she left you to get all your food. As you waited you drummed your fingers on the counter. She was back before you knew it and handed you your food.

“Hopefully that's not all for you.” She chuckled, nodding to the food stacked in your arms.

“I don’t think I'll even get what is mine with how hungry my friends always are.” You replied with a chuckle of your own.

“Well, you're always welcome to come back.”

“Now, is that a marketing line or an excuse to see me again?” You questioned with a raise of your eyebrow.

“Depends on your answer.” She responded.

“I guess you’ll have to find out later.” You smiled, looking back at your friends who were waving you over.

“If i’m not here just ask for Holly.”

“Yea-” You started a reply but was cut off as someone spoke over you.

“I think they will be fine.” You didn’t need to turn around to notice who it was, sending a look of apology to Holly, you walked back to your friends with Leah.

“What was that for?” You asked.

“What?” Leah replied, acting oblivious.

“Back there, I was talking to her.”

“You were taking too long and everyone is hungry.” Leah said, dodging the real reason.

“Whatever.” You muttered, speeding up so you walked ahead of her.

Everyone cheered once you placed down all the food that you had brought and were quick to tuck in.

You sat down in your original place and fiddled with the receipt, not bothering to touch your food, once you realised there was writing on the back. You turned the receipt over and in blue writing was a number scribbled down with ‘text me’ underneath it.

Letting a smile take over your features, you looked over your shoulder and caught Holly’s eye, sending her a quick wink before finally opening the packet of crisps you bought.

Leah, who was sitting in front of you instead of next to you, watched the whole interaction and couldn't help the frown that formed on her face, anger bubbling from deep inside.

“What have you got there y/l/n?” Leah asked before she could stop herself and you looked like a deer caught in headlights.

Everyone turned to face you where you were sitting, struggling to find something to say.

“Y/n’s got someone's number.” Steph said as she looked over your shoulder and the girls ‘oohed’ teasingly.

“Leave me alone.” You chuckled, putting the receipt in your pocket.

“You going to text them?” Lotte questioned and you didn't miss the way Leah rolled her eyes.

“I don't know, do you think I should Leah?” You said, looking at Leah with a challenging look on your face.

“Why are you asking me?”

“It's just that you don’t like me, so you won’t mind me asking them out, right?

“No.” Leah said, a little too quickly gaining a look from a couple of the girls.

“No, as in you don’t mind or..?”

“I- I don’t-” Leah struggled, “just do what you want.”

Before you could even comprehend what was going on, Leah had gotten up rather abruptly and made her way into the toilets.

“What was that about?” You questioned, looking at the other girls.

“I think you should go talk to her.” Viv suggested.

“Why? I mean, you see how much we don’t like each other.”

“Actually, we see how much you love each other.” Beth corrected.

“You’re joking,” you laughed, “she hates my guts.”

“But what about you?”

“What about me?”

“How do you feel about her?” Jen joined in.

“Okay, there's no need for you to gang up on me.” You said, raising your hands up in defence.

“Just go talk to her. I think you both need to have a one on one conversation.” Rafa said.

“Fine, but if we end up killing each other, it's not my fault.” You sighed, getting up from your seat and making your way to the bathroom.

As you walked into the toilets you saw Leah splash her face with some water. At the sound of the door being closed, Leah looked into the mirror and her eyes caught yours.

“How was the hangover this morning?” You asked, not really knowing what else to say.

“What are you doing in here, y/n?” Leah wondered, ignoring what you had said and getting straight to the point.

“I came to check on you,” you shrugged, “the girls made me do it.”

“How kind of you.” Leah said sarcastically.

“Why’d you run off?” You questioned, walking closer to her.

“Like you care.”

“I did ask.”

“It’s complicated.”

“I don't mind complicated.” You said, leaning back against the sink.

“I don't know.” Leah mumbled, looking at her hands. “I guess I got hurt.”

“How?” You asked, genuinely confused.

“Seeing you talk to that girl-”

“Holly.”

“-yes her, I don't know, I guess it hurt knowing that I couldn’t make you smile like she did.”

“So you're jealous? That's why you interrupted our conversation.”

“No, tha- I- no. I'm not jealous.”

“So if i were to go back out-” You said, pointing your thumb towards the door.

“No.” Leah said quickly, grabbing onto your arm.

And that's when you felt it. Her cold hands on your arm sending sparks up to your heart, setting your whole body alight. Her chest was moving up and down, her gaze actively avoiding yours.

“You know, all of this would be so much easier if I actually hated you.” You whispered, your right hand coming up to brush a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

“What do you mean?” Leah asked, her gaze finally meeting yours.

“I never hated you and I never will.”

You cupped her cheek and ran your thumb along her cheekbone. Leah leant into your touch, unable to stop herself from the overwhelming feelings bubbling inside her.

Before either of you could realise what you were doing, you were both leaning in. Leah's grip tightened and her breath got caught in her throat. Hesitantly, you placed your lips on hers.

The sudden action had stunned Leah, her breath catching in her throat. She did not expect you to kiss her now. As her brain started to register what was going on, she kissed you back, putting her hands on your waist pulling you closer.

The two of you were caught up in your own small world, getting lost in the kiss. It wasn't rushed nor hungry, it was passionate and slow. You ended the kiss as you needed to breathe, getting a soft whine of protest from Leah.

“We shouldn’t be doing this.” You said breathlessly.

“Kiss me again.” Leah said, not letting go of your waist.

“But- mmph”

You moved your hand from Leah’s cheek to bury your fingers in her hair, the other hand sprawled out on the small of Leah’s back, pulling her closer until your chests were pressed together. The defender clutched the bottom of your shirt, feeling as it slowly rode upwards.

Her cold fingers splayed across your stomach, gently scratching your skin. You finally broke the kiss once again and you leaned your forehead against hers.

“For the record, I still hate you.” Leah smiled, her chest rising and falling rapidly.

“No you don't.” You chuckled.

“No I don't.” Leah said, shaking her head slightly, placing another peck to your lips.

#leah williamson #leah williamson x reader #leah williamson imagine #leah williamson imagines #woso #woso imagine #woso imagines

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syrstab · 3 months

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⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ SUNSET SPOTTING!

a/n : hi so this isnt my best piece of work, i js felt like i needed 2 post :P (also, im REALLY shit at writing furina + neuvillette, i js wanted to try writing them, sorry if its inaccurate :( +THE BEGINNING IS HARD TO READ LIKE I HATE IT SM ARRRGHHH - i reread this and i found it MAD cringey sooo..

SUMMARY - basically you and furina suggested to neuvillette to go out in public. of course neuvillette was a busy man, but he just has to make time for you. ( also watching the sunset :> )

you and furina were catching up over some tea, as you two rarely saw each other as you were both so busy with work.

“hey furina..”

“yes y/n?” furina looked up, her bright blue eyes meeting yours, taking a sip of her tea

“you, me and my darling neuvillette should go out today.” you say proudly, as if all three of you would go out together. it’s always just been you and furina.

furina giggled when you called neuvillette your 'darling' and took another sip of her tea whilst looking around. “your absolutely obsessed with neuvillette, y/n. I personally find it adorable how you gush over him twenty-four seven , but, i highly doubt all three of us would go out. neuvillette is practically drowning in work…”

you pursed your lips, as if you really thought about it

“just you watch furina, all three of us WILL go out together!” you say with a smug smirk, getting out of your chair.

“y/n, y/n, y/n…” furina sighed putting her tea down and following you.

you proudly walked to neuvillettes office, where of course, he’s doing boring documents and signing papers.

“how’s my gorgeous, cunning, sexy, handsome, beautiful, iconic, courageous boyfriend THE neuvillette doing?” you beam whilst opening the door, furina trailing behind you

“well, hello to you too, y/n.” neuvillette smiles. he knew you were going to ask him for something, as you don’t usually call him those lovey-dovey names. at least, not all together.

“i have a teeny, tiny itzy bitzy request for you.” you grin, furina facepalming knowing damn well this whole 'going out together' thing isn’t going to happen and it’s just going to be you and furina, again.

“go on, my love.” neuvillette stops writing and places his quill down, then interlocking his fingers together like some sort of ceo, i mean he is chief justice of fontaine..

“sooo… i was wondering if you could stop working for an hour or two, to go out in public to clear our minds? we both know how stressed out you’ve been recently.” you furrowed your brows at that last comment, attempting to persuade him to stop working

he purses his lips, glancing at the window in his office “mmm… as much as i want too, i simply cannot. i’m sure furina told you about how much work i’m doing.”

“pretty pleaaaaseeeeee neuuuuuvi?” neuvillette knew you were the type to try to get anyone do anything for you, and the fact you added his adorable nickname you made for him, he REALLY thought about it.

“come on y/n, maybe just us TWO should go out together. let’s LEAVE this poor man alone.” furina says, adjusting her little top hat on her head, attempting to egg you on with the comment she just made

“you’re SO right furina!! we should DEFINITELY go out together, WITHOUT the chief justice of Fontaine!!” you and furina turned around, backs facing neuvillette, arm in arm, smiling at eachother

“have fun, you two. don’t get into too much trouble.” neuvillette waved you and furina off, your mouth agape as neuvi said this. was this man REALLY being serious?

“uggghhhhhhh please neuvi? just for an hour! pretty please with a cherry on top?” you turned around, and at this point you were properly begging for this man, and neuvi took notice of your whiny voice

furina chuckled at how desperate you were for him to go out. neuvillette usually kept himself out of the public eye, unless you dragged him outside.

you grasped neuvillette’s hand, pulling him outside his office. “you can do those shitty documents later, the suns about to set.. and there’s nothing like watching the sunset with my lovely boyfriend!” you gleamed at neuvi, furina leading you outside to the nearest aquabus station she could find.

you found yourself on the aquabus which Aeval was always on, and you, furina and neuvillette stroke up a conversation with her. you weren’t talking about anything specific, just whatever came to mind.

after a while, you came to romaritime harbor. there weren’t many people there, as it was getting late.

“you don’t have to act all tough and regal, neuvi.” you nudged him lightly, as it seemed he was holding a lot of weight on his shoulders, after all, he is a very important man.

“i suppose so. there isn’t many civilians around today..” neuvillette huffed, dropping his shoulders ever so slightly

“awwh, what cuties you two are…” furina giggled to herself as the three of you walked towards the edge of the balcony

the sun was setting behind sumeru’s desert mountains, and everything felt perfect.

you stood in between furina and neuvillette, staring out whilst your head rested on neuvillette’s shoulder. there was a comfortable silence in the air.

“i love you, neuvillette.”

“i love you too, y/n.”

“...aaaaaaand BOOM! you get married to eachother, have kids and live happily ever after.” furina smirked, knowing you’d blush at the thought of getting married to the iudex himself, neuvillette.

“oh shush, furina.” you waved her off, one hand covering your cheeks as they were painted a rosy pink

“…i would like that.” neuvillette says, looking at the painted sky

“...like what?” you asked, looking up at him

“i would like to get married to you, and have children with you.” neuvi looked down at you, making eye contact

“i would like that, too.” you smiled at him.

“ooooooooooooooh~” furina says in a high pitched voice, leaning forwards

“oh shut up, furina!” you and neuvillette groaned in unison, and once you both realised you said that at the exact same time, you all started laughing together.

#genshin fluff #genshin x reader #genshin impact fluff #furina fluff #neuvillette x reader #neuvillette fluff #neuvillette fanfic #furina fanfic

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respectthepetty · 6 months

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Because when a color demon is summoned by @negrowhat and @mggsttn's post, I show up!

Top 5 - Color-Coded Storytelling in BLs

Y'all already know what number one is, but let's pretend you don't. Instead follow me on this journey into BLs that gave the best color-coded storytelling. In order to be considered for this list:

The story had to integrate the colors into multiple aspects of the series: wardrobe, lighting, accessories, setting, etc.

The colors had to be meaningful to the plot.

The narrative did not explicitly state what the colors meant.

The color coding had to be consistent and featured in each episode.

The series has to be finished.

So let's begin!

Honorable Mention: Oh No! Here Comes Trouble

This isn't a BL (yet it's queer, so anyone who says it isn't can argue with the ghosts), but that damn red thread of fate had me and Yiyong messed up all season! The appearance of the color red in the series was less of an alarm, and more of a signal that every single moment was connected. All those single red threads that Yiyong and his unlikely crime-solving buddies weaved each episode came together at the last minute not only to solve the crime, but to stitch Yiyong together and bring him back from the edge of death because the true message of the show about fate and dying was how connection is what makes life worth living.

#5 - Moonlight Chicken

Director Aof and Cinematographer Rath never miss, but this particular story being told in this series through the symbolism and lighting depicting moon vs. sun, coldness vs. warmth, dislike vs. love, and so much more was phenomenal. Watch the scene of Li Meng holding a crying Heart in Heart's cold, blue, dark room then witness the two kissing in Li Meng's warm, orange-ish, bright living room or watch the hatred and blue melting off of Alan as he begins to find love again and you'll understand that the color coding in this show wasn't just a simple red versus blue dynamic. This was the work of PROFESSIONALS. This color coding was like tiramisu made by the best Italian chef; it had layers and was effing delicious!

#4 - My Beautiful Man

This show did several visual devices oh-so-well. We got Hira always being lower than Kiyoi. We got the duck. We got Hira capturing Kiyoi with his camera instead of being present with him. We got traditional colors but with that Japanese twist. And all of the elements worked together to give us an elite visual story. Hira was blue. Kiyoi was white. Hira was the loyal and reserved servant. Kiyoi was a god. Yet this was the point of contention between the two. Kiyoi wasn't a heavenly being. He was a human boy devoid of love. He wanted Hira to love him, not worship him. He wanted Hira to stand with him, not lower himself. He wanted Hira to live with him, not through him. So we saw Kiyoi struggle with his color when he didn't feel stable in their relationship, but once Hira made it clear that he loved Kiyoi, Kiyoi never shined brighter.

#3 - My Love Mix-Up

Nobody does colors like Japan. It color codes its ties. It leans into the religious aspect of the light versus dark color scheme. It invents new ways to color-code and is always evolving . . . like Aoki's orange color did in this series. Our disaster bisexual started the series with a muted color and as he discovered he liked a boy and not the girl he originally was crushing on, his color started to emerge. At first it was a soft yellow, but by the end, it was a vibrant orange. Ida was a solid blue, so watching Aoki's feeling deepen for him was electric each time the blue lighting lingered on his face until it overwhelmed him. Oh, and that color exchange is the best that has ever been done!

#2 - Semantic Error

This show tricked us. Jae Young played us the way he played Sang Woo, yet Jae Young's true colors were revealed as the boys spent more time with each other because isn't that the entire point of color coding? Seeing people's true colors without having to be told? Jae Young started off as red solely because quiet and introverted Blue Boy Sang Woo HATED red. That was it! That was the entire reason Jae Young became red. He just wanted to piss off Sang Woo. But as the boys worked together and Jae Young's personality shown through, Sang Woo realized Jae Young wasn't the devil he made him out to be and was actually a pretty chill Green Guy who he wanted to hug longer than two weeks.

#1 - Big Dragon

The only reason 82% of the crowd decided to watch this show was because of the visual above. Let that sink in. This one visual piqued y'alls interest enough to watch a show about a guy drugging someone to have sex with him and blackmail him with the tape of it so he could *looks at notes* get the girl? A girl?! And the guy who was drugged, almost sexually assaulted, and blackmailed was *checks notes again* HE WAS IN TO IT?!

Y'all hated this show. I loved it. Y'all think it was ridiculous. I love it. Y'all are rolling your eyes right now. I will always love it because it understood the assignment! I can't keep repeating the same points over and over, but here I go again:

Everything was color coded!

And it all supported the story. It never distracted from the story. It never became its own story. It was laced into the story. It did exactly what visual rhetoric is supposed to - show don't tell.

And it showed me when Yai opened his heart to Mangkorn.

And how Mangkorn's love transformed Yai.

It showed me that Yai's sister was his only source of light living in that isolated house.

It showed me the warmth Yai felt from Mangkorn's mom.

And it showed me that no matter how much he protested, Yai was deep in love.

And to think it all started here.

And ended up here.

That's the power of color coding and remarkable visuals.

It makes you see the beauty is in the details.

#color coded boys in love #the colors mean things #color coded storytelling #I'll have a different answer when something better comes along #until then big dragon is always the answer #moonlight chicken #my beautiful man #my love mix-up #semantic error #big dragon

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mysterious-moonstruck-musings · 7 months

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Destiny & Deliverance: Chapter 22

Destiny & Deliverance Masterlist ||| Dieter Bravo X OFC New as of 9/30/2023

SUPPORT YOUR CREATORS. REBLOGGING & COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED.

Series Rating: Explicit (18+)

Series Summary: Natalia Cohen is experiencing major life changes, beginning with leaving an emotionally abusive husband. She is learning how to navigate life on her own while dealing with high functioning anxiety, depression, and mild PTSD. Everything is looking up for her. She is a highly respected consultant for a major LA firm, has her best friend, Lauren, by her side, and is on her path to healing. Everything changes when she meets a handsome and broken stranger on a work trip. He turns out to be a well-known actor, with a heart-breaking past. They quickly develop a connection that will forever alter their lives.

Warnings: Themes dealing with mental health, emotional trauma, alcohol use, and discussions about suicide. There will be fluff, tears, spicy language, and smut. This will be a slow burn type of story. Read at your own risk.

Chapter Quote: "I could feel the darkness setting in."

It had been three days since the call with Dieter that turned my life upside down. It had also been three days since I was sober. I was spiraling. Hard. Lauren and Gabby had both tried calling me, but I refused to answer, sending the calls straight to voicemail. Their text messages followed, making it clear that they knew something had happened. The only response I would give them is that I didn’t want to talk to anyone about it for the foreseeable future.

Dieter had posted pictures on his social media account from the movie set. Several of them showed Chloe hanging all over him. He had removed the picture of the two of us, taken by him when I was sleeping, that he had previously shared on his account. That alone was a clear indication that something was going on. Not just to me, but to everybody - if it hadn’t tipped off Lauren and Gabby, the tabloids most certainly would notice. As always, they loved reading between the lines. To make things worse, they had published a series of photos from when I visited Dieter on set. Most of the images showed us together and happy, but there was also a candid shot, taken right after his confrontation with Craig. Unsurprisingly, the narrative provided did not match what had actually happened. The gossip rags made it seem like he and I were having an argument. It was all completely fabricated nonsense that only added more fuel to the already blazing fire.

That evening, I was sitting on a lounge chair next to the pool as the sun started to set over the hills. I stared blankly at the water rippling in the pool, my mind hazy as I occasionally took a swig from the bottle of vodka in my hand. It burned in my throat, despite the liquor being top shelf, but it didn’t bother me too much; every time the sting hit, it helped shove away the thoughts crawling through my head.

When the sliding door near the patio suddenly opened, I saw Lauren stride out of the house with purpose, her eyes set on me. She paused in front of me, staring me down with a look of sympathy on her face.

“You look like shit.”

“Thanks for stating the obvious,” I slurred as I took another drink from the bottle. I tried to think of how to get rid of her. I wasn’t ready to have this conversation and I wasn’t sure if I ever would be.

I felt uncomfortable under her gaze as she took in my appearance. It made me fidget nervously as I avoided her eyes. Besides, I knew how I looked. I hadn’t showered in three days, which had turned my hair into a mess of tangled curls that pointed in all directions. My face was red and splotchy, and I could feel how swollen my eyes were from the ridiculous amount of crying I had done. My outfit consisting of a pair of cotton shorts, a ratty t-shirt, and robe didn’t do much to help me either; I felt like death and probably didn’t look far from it.

Lauren snatched the bottle of vodka from my hand as she sat down beside me, shaking her head when I tried to grab it back.

“No.”

I gave her a look of annoyance and snatched it back anyway.

“Don’t worry, I’m pacing myself.” My eyes drifted back to focus on the water.

She snorted but chose not to reply, for which I was grateful. Instead, she asked, “Have you eaten today?”

I sighed heavily, “Yes, I ordered a pizza.” I stayed focused on the pool, not breaking the trance of my eyes on the rippling water, wishing it would swallow me up and drown out all the thoughts running through my mind.

“Do you want to fill me in on what happened?”

I turned my head to look at her, my brows knitted together in confusion.

“I don’t know what to tell you,” I paused briefly. “I don’t even fucking know.”

It was her turn to look confused, “You didn’t get into an argument at that bar?”

I waved my hand dismissively, now annoyed that even my best friend was apparently reading the tabloids to check in on me.

“No. That’s all a bunch of bullshit.”

She nodded in understanding. “Okay. So, what happened?”, she pressed, once again trying to take the bottle away from me.

“Can we just not? I don’t wanna talk about it. With anyone, ok?” I gave her a stern look as I held the vodka out of her reach, then took a swig. I meant it. I knew she was annoyed that I wasn’t offering any details, because I had never been resistant to discussing certain things with her. But I didn’t want to talk about any of it now. I couldn’t.

“You can see that I’m fine and breathing,” I offered, gesturing at myself. “You’ve accomplished your mission. Can I just be alone now? Please?” I gave her a pleading look. It was clear that she was hurt, but I didn’t have the capacity to deal with that.

Lauren scoffed as a look of frustration formed on her face. She looked like she was about to say something, then stopped herself as she turned around, striding back toward the house as she shook her head. After she left, I felt a wave of anger come over me. I had been trying to push it away for days, but her attempts at making me talk had just sliced open all the wounds again and it felt like anger was seeping from my pores. I grasped the liquor tight in my hands and stood up, needing a moment to balance myself, then made my way over to my craft room.

The painting that I had started for Dieter felt so much bigger than the space it actually took up, and I couldn’t stop myself from walking over to it. Tracing my fingers over the painted canvas, I had to think back to our time in Sonoma. The memories had been on a loop in my head over the past days. He had been so different. I couldn’t understand why he had done a complete one-eighty on me, acting like a completely different person. Maybe Anna was right. Maybe I didn’t know him, and I couldn’t handle him at his worst.

Out of a habit that had crept up on me over the past days, I moved to take another drink of the vodka I was still clutching in my hand, then stopped midway as I stared at the bottle. Fuck. I was losing myself again. It hadn’t just been the anger roaring inside me that had started to seep out - it was actual darkness that had been setting in, carving out places inside of me as it slowly took over, numbing my brain. I let out a frustrated scream as I threw the bottle against the wall beside the painting. I decided in that moment that I wasn’t going to allow myself to go back to that dark place. I had been there before and barely made it out alive. This time it would consume me completely if I let it happen again, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to come back from it.

Clinging onto the sudden wave of clarity, I went upstairs to the kitchen and pulled down every bottle of alcohol that I could find. I poured it all down the sink without a second thought. Then I forced myself to take a shower. The water wasn’t soothing, but rather a slap to my face - first so hot that condensation fogged up the entire bathroom, before I changed the temperature so the cold hit me even harder, giving me goosebumps all over. It helped to pull me out of my head and back into my body. It was amazing how much better I felt afterwards. After that, I set my alarm and went to bed. At that point, I was determined to move on and keep this from affecting me as much as possible. If he didn’t want to be with me, there was nothing I could do about it. Which meant there were zero reasons for me to continue to dwell on it. I was only hurting myself by doing that. He had already inflicted more than enough pain on me than I knew how to deal with.

The next morning, I got up to get ready to go into work. I needed to get out of the house. Away from him. He was still here, a little piece of him in every room. Clothing, shoes, a toothbrush, his scent on the sheets… it was all a painful reminder that he currently existed somewhere that wasn’t with me. I needed to get away from it all and clear my head.

I dressed in a form fitting pencil dress with a matching blazer and black pumps, styling my hair in soft waves around my face and down my back. Some heavier makeup than usual helped to cover the redness left by days of crying.

I knew paparazzi would be outside the office, waiting like they had been doing every day since the Anna incident. They knew I couldn’t stay away forever. If I ran into them, I wanted to make a statement without words. One that said I was moving on and that I was fine. I was no longer the weak and anxious woman I had been with Justin. That was one thing I could thank Dieter for; he helped me get my confidence back. No matter what, I wasn’t going to let anything take that away from me, not even him giving up on us. I needed all that confidence and resilience to get through this.

The paps had obviously gotten a little wiser, now realizing where the employees parked. There were at least seven of them waiting at the entrance to the lot, watching every car that entered. They wasted no time following behind my vehicle on foot as I searched for an open space. As soon as my door opened, they started peppering me with questions about Dieter and the status of our relationship. I attempted to exude confidence as I gave them nothing but a polite smile while I walked toward the entrance of the building. Careful not to give any sort of reaction to their harsh line of questioning.

The atmosphere in the office shifted as soon as I walked in the door. The tension was visible in the faces and posture of every person in the room. They all seemed shocked to see me. No one said anything, they just looked at me with wide eyes. My eyes danced around to each of them before I continued walking toward my office. Kerrie entered behind me after a few minutes had passed. She was clearly nervous and not sure how to act.

“Is there anything you need from me?” she asked timidly.

I stared at her momentarily as I bit the inside of my cheek.

“Yeah, can you get me a status update on our new accounts? And set up a meeting with Steve. I know he has some sort of problem he needs his hand held through.”

She nodded, “Talia, I don’t know what happened but…”

I raised my hand to stop her from continuing, “It doesn’t matter. I would much rather not talk about it. I don’t want anyone to mention it. I’m fine and I’m moving on. Let’s just try to get back to normal, please.”

She gave a slight grimace before nodding in understanding and walking out of the room.

From that moment on, I slid back into my pre-Dieter routine. My day went by quickly. I stayed busy enough that I didn’t have time to think about him, which was refreshing. It was exactly what I needed to recenter myself and move forward. Of course, I was again reminded of him as I walked to my car. The paps that were still hanging around asking questions they thought might get a reaction out of me. I continued with a polite smile and silence as I made my way to leave. Luckily, no one tried to follow me home this time.

That evening, I was determined to remove every trace of Dieter I could find. I put everything that belonged to him in boxes and set them in the garage. I washed his smell out of all the sheets and blankets, wanting no trace of him left behind. I wanted it to be like he was never there. It was the only way I was going to be able to move forward.

Though removing all proof of his existence from my home helped, the following week was a little harder on me. I knew Dieter was scheduled to be on a filming break. It was the few days we had planned for him to come home and spend with me, but I wasn’t sure if he was still coming back to LA or not. I wondered if he would try to reach out if he was in town or if he would even bother to come home at all. The Friday he had been scheduled to fly in, I was anxious and had a hard time focusing while I was at work. Not knowing what to expect was the most stressful thing to me.

I got my answer later that evening when I finally broke down and checked his Instagram account. He had posted pictures of himself with Anna and a couple of other people. The caption indicated they were at a club opening in New York City. In every photo he had a drink in hand and appeared to be intoxicated. I couldn’t be sure that was the case, but his eyes looked different. They seemed darker and emotionless somehow. It made me feel uneasy as I swiped through them. I did take solace in the fact that he was on the other side of the country, and I wouldn’t have to worry about running into him here. Hopefully he was planning to stay there for the entire duration of his break. I hated to see that he was back with his old group of friends though. That was just asking for trouble, particularly because he had been in such a bad headspace.

I sighed heavily as I threw my phone down, rubbing at my eyes as I leaned my head back against the couch, willing myself to stop thinking about him. I left my hands covering my eyes for a few minutes while I tried to clear my thoughts of him, completely zoning out in the process. When I removed my hands and raised my head, I was startled by Lauren. She was standing in front of me with her hands on her hips, a look of annoyance on her face.

I jumped slightly at her appearance, “Fucking hell, what are you doing? Can’t you just announce yourself? You’re gonna give me a heart attack doing that shit.”

“So, you’re feeling well enough to go to work and act like nothing is wrong, but you can’t respond to any of my texts or calls?”

“Jumping right to it then…” I chuckled, but my chest tightened nervously as I knew there was no avoiding her now. “Yes, sorry. I had to spend time cleansing my life of that asshole's existence after work. I’ve been busy.”

“That asshole? Cleansing? What the hell are you talking about?” She now had a look of confusion on her face.

“Dieter, the asshole. I packed up all his stuff. I don’t want any trace of him here. It’s all gotta go.” I said in an eerily calm way as I gave her a serious look.

“Are you ever gonna tell me what the hell happened? How are you in a drunken stupor over him one day, then completely back to normal the next?”

“You wanna know what happened?”, I snapped back at her. “He said I’m a fucking burden and inconvenience that he doesn’t have time for. We’re not compatible and it’s just not working for him anymore. There are better options out there, whatever the fuck that means…”

I gestured wildly with my hands as I spoke, my voice laced with anger. Lauren’s eyes got wider with each word. Her jaw hung open in shock.

“He really said all that?” She covered her mouth with one hand in disbelief.

“Yeah.” I raised my brows as I gave her a tight smile, then shrugged as I shook my head.

“Well, that wasn’t what I expected. I was hoping it was just a misunderstanding or something.”

“No. He ended it over the phone with those exact words.”

She sighed. “Ok, well that makes sense as to why he won’t respond to my texts.”

“Don’t try to contact him, please. It’s not worth your time.” I waved my hand dismissively at her.

She had an odd look on her face, like she was conflicted about something. It was gone as quickly as it appeared, then she was on to the next question.

“That doesn’t explain how you’re suddenly ok… going into work like nothing happened while smiling at the paparazzi like you're living your best life.”

“Oh, is that how it looks? Good”. It was the first thing in days that I actually felt good about, or at least decided that it was how I wanted to come across. “He doesn’t need to know I spent days wasted and depressed over his ass.”

“Talia, what is going on with you?” She now had a genuine look of concern.

“Lauren… I made a conscious decision to move past it. I don’t need him. I’m not gonna pine over someone who doesn’t want to be with me. It’s just gonna make me spiral again if I do.”

I stood to walk toward the kitchen to get something to drink out of the refrigerator. Lauren followed closely behind me, looking confused again.

She scoffed, “So what, you're choosing anger now? I’m not sure that’s the healthiest way to deal with this either.”

I whirled around to face her, almost bristling at the comment. “As opposed to causing my liver to die a slow death? I think it’s a pretty fucking good way of dealing with it. Besides, why wouldn’t I be mad? Those were some fucking hurtful things he said to me.”

Lauren nodded briefly in agreement, “Alright. Fair enough. I can’t argue with that logic.”

She sighed heavily as she leaned against the counter, taking the canned coffee beverage I offered her.

“I guess I should count my blessings. I really thought I was gonna have to come make you take a shower and force feed you after the last time I saw you.” She smiled as she opened her coffee.

I gave her a small laugh in return. She wasn’t wrong. I was a mess that day she came over.

She took a quick drink before changing the subject, “Well, I wasn’t gonna ask, but since you seem to be living your best life these days…I have that art fundraiser thing tomorrow. You wanna be my plus one? I have a painting on display.”

“Of course! I’m not gonna miss out on that.” I gave her a genuine smile this time. I knew that I had been very absent in our friendship lately, and I needed to do better. I wanted to do better.

“It’s kind of fancy. Do you have something to wear?” She grimaced slightly at her words, knowing I wouldn’t be too thrilled about it.

I sighed, “How fancy?”

“Like semi-formal.” She gave me a cheesy hopeful smile.

“I don’t think I do. I’ll go find something in the morning, just for you.”

Lauren bounced up and down, clapping in excitement. She moved to hug me around the neck.

“Thank you for going!” She said somewhat breathlessly. “It might be good for you to get out of the house and do something fun anyway,” she added as she pulled away.

Lauren left soon after that, in a considerably better mood than when she arrived. She seemed satisfied with my current state, which was probably a good thing. I really didn’t want her nagging me constantly. Above all else, I didn’t want her to spend time worrying about me. She had enough on her plate as it was.

After she left, I decided to get ready for bed a little early and watch TV until I fell asleep. Even though I outwardly appeared to be doing ok, sleep had been an issue since that call. It was restless and frequently interrupted for absolutely no reason other than I was wide awake with anxious energy. It was starting to become an issue again. Deep down, I knew it had everything to do with Dieter, but I refused to admit it to myself. I couldn’t allow myself to miss him in any type of way or else I was going to spiral again. I resorted back to taking melatonin, which seemed to be doing the trick for now. Hopefully that wouldn’t change.

I woke up around 8AM the next morning, feeling decently rested. I decided to go for a quick run before I showered. I had been slacking off on that lately and figured it might help me burn some energy off. I opted to go for a run around the neighborhood, making sure to go in the opposite direction of Dieter’s house. I didn’t want any surprises. After that, I got ready to go find a dress for the art fundraiser. I dressed in some ripped jeans and a plain black t-shirt. I threw a hat and sunglasses on for good measure, because, yes, I was that person now.

I decided to go to a local couture dress shop that Lauren and I had been successful at previously. Since it was a small boutique, I was hopeful I wouldn’t run into any issues while I was there. When I entered, one of the employees came over to assist me, introducing herself as Daniella. I gave her the details of what I was looking for, mentioning that it was for the art fundraiser that evening. As I said the words, I immediately wished I hadn’t done so. I needed to learn to keep details to myself instead of mentioning them to people I didn’t know. She left me for a few minutes as she went to pull some dresses for me. After she walked off, I took my sunglasses off and stuck them in the neckline of my shirt because I felt like a loser for wearing them inside.

While I was flipping through the racks, I noticed another employee staring at me with a perplexed look on her face. I sighed; I had a feeling she recognized me. I turned my back toward her and wandered off to another part of the shop, out of her sight, in hopes she hadn’t worked out who I was. Daniella appeared several minutes later with an arm full of dresses. The other employee trailed behind her holding several other options. She introduced herself as Emily. I gave her a polite smile as she continued to stare at me.

“I’m sorry to keep staring, but do I know you from somewhere? I feel like I’ve seen you before,” Emily said as she continued to look at me, her brows knitted together in a puzzled expression.

“I don’t think so. I’ve been here a few times. Maybe you saw me then.”

“I don’t think so, I haven’t worked here that long.”

I shrugged and gave her a tight smile, “I guess I just have one of those faces then.”

Emily gave me a nervous laugh in response. Daniella led me over to the fitting room as Emily followed. They started to tell me about the dresses they had pulled for me. They were particularly excited for me to try a sapphire blue lacy cocktail dress they insisted would look “amazing” with my skin tone.

I thanked them as I entered the dressing room and started trying things on. I could hear hushed voices outside the door as I worked my way through the dresses that I liked. I heard one of them whisper, “I think that’s her,” followed by several shushing sounds. I dropped my head and sighed heavily. It figures this would happen. I couldn’t get out of his shadow no matter how hard I tried.

I got down to the last dress, which was the blue lacy one they were raving about. It fit perfectly. It was a form fitting silky fabric with a lace overlay, showing off all my curves in a very flattering way. The lace fabric extended down several inches below the silk lining at the bottom allowing skin to show through. It had lace sleeves that set slightly off-shoulder and unlined lace around the midsection. It looked classy, yet sexy. I snapped a pic in the mirror and sent it to Lauren right quick. Then I moved to put my clothes back on. She replied just as I was finishing up.

LAUREN: That’s like a revenge dress! It’s perfect! GET IT!

I chuckled at her response. With Lauren’s approval, I was going with it. I really just wanted this shopping trip over with at this point. I was nervous how things were going to go once I walked out of the dressing room.

I put the plastic back over the dress and made my exit. Daniella, Emily, and another girl paused their conversation to turn and look at me with wide eyes. Daniella gave me an overly enthusiastic smile as she asked if I found what I needed.

“Yes, I think so. I actually love the blue one. Thank you.” I tried to give them a genuine smile as they kept staring at me.

“I think I’m ready to check out now.”

“Of course! Right… this way.” Daniella said.

“Are you that Natalia girl that’s dating Dieter Bravo?” Emily blurted out.

I gave a tight smile, “You caught me, yeah, that’s me.” I didn’t bother to correct her. It still hadn’t been confirmed that we had actually split up.

“Oh my gosh! I knew you looked familiar. Can I take a picture with you?”

“With me? No, I’m nobody to be taking pictures with,” I laughed nervously. She was about to protest when the third girl, whose name I didn’t know, poked her in the back to shut up. Daniella started the checkout process while the other two stood by awkwardly smiling at me. Emily spoke up again, “So are you going to the fundraiser with Dieter tonight?”

I tried to control the pained look on my face as I responded, “Umm no, he’s out town right now.”

“Oh, that’s a bummer, it would have been cool to see you with him in one of our dresses!”

“Yeah, sorry to disappoint.” I gave her a tight smile.

I was trying so hard to be polite even though I could feel myself slowly dying inside. After I collected my card and dress, I thanked them again as I put my sunglasses back on and made a quick exit to the car before they tried to ask me any more questions. I had to take a moment to calm myself when I got in the car. I could feel my heart racing in my chest from that interaction. This had to stop at some point, right? Maybe I should have said we split. Would that make people leave me alone or make things worse? I sighed. “This fucking sucks” I said out loud to no one as I started the car to go home.

I began getting ready for the event as soon as I got home. Afraid that if I didn’t keep myself busy, my mind would wander to thoughts of Dieter. I managed it successfully until Lauren came over. She was scrolling through her phone while she waited for me to finish up. “What the…” She groaned as she came over to show me a post shared by a fan account. One of the salesgirls at the boutique had seriously snapped a picture while I wasn’t paying attention and posted it. They included details about the dress I bought and the event I was attending. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. I shouldn’t even be surprised at this point.

“Well, at least the picture is decent, and you are sort of smiling in it. They also said you were nice. That counts for something, right?” Lauren asked hesitantly, trying to brighten my mood.

“Yeah, at least they didn’t say I was a bitch. I’m sure that would have fueled more gossip.” I replied sardonically as I walked toward my closet to get dressed.

As I was pulling up the zipper on the back of the dress, I started to have flashes of memories. Dieter’s hand lightly brushing my back as he zipped me up the night we went to the club, our eyes meeting in the mirror while he adjusted the straps for me. I quickly shook my head to clear the thoughts. I had managed to keep those types of memories at bay for the most part. I didn’t want to start having them now.

I took a deep breath before reaching down to grab my shoes and walking out to see Lauren sitting on the edge of the bed, still scrolling through her phone. She looked up, her mouth hanging open slightly, “Hot damn. You look so fucking good in that.”

I laughed at her as I walked over to the dresser to grab the earrings I had set out, turning back to her as I put them on.

“Ok, I’m ready. I think.”

“I must take a picture of you. Pose please,” she said with excitement as she opened the camera on her phone.

I gave her my best model pose, my hands on my hips, with a playful smile before I burst into laughter at how ridiculous I felt while she snapped away.

“Damn, that’s actually a good picture.”

She turned her phone to show it to me. She had snapped the photo just as I was starting to laugh, so for once it looked like I had a genuine smile on my face.

“Hmm, send that to me. It might be Insta worthy.” I handed her phone back to her.

She got quiet for a minute as she started typing away on her phone, a determined look on her face.

“What are you doing?” I raised an eyebrow in her direction.

She briefly glanced up at me then went back to typing, “Nothing.”

“Lauren.” I said sternly.

She raised an eyebrow back at me, “Just making sure that jerk knows what he is missing.”

“What?!?!” I snatched her phone away just as she hit send. I turned it toward me to see what she had been doing. She had Instagram Messenger open to a conversation with her and Dieter. She sent him the picture with the message “Just wanted you to see what you’re missing out on, asshole.” Above that were several unanswered messages of her asking him what was going on and why he wouldn’t answer her. I realized there was a possibility that she had been missing him too. The three of us hanging out had become such a routine, particularly on Fridays, but it only just now occurred to me that he had bailed out on her as well.

I didn’t have too much time to consider those thoughts; as I was looking at the phone, the message status of the photo with Lauren’s comment changed to “seen” right as I looked at it. I could feel knots in my stomach, knowing that he was on the other end of the chat right now.

“Why the fuck would you do that?”

She shrugged, “Because it’s a big fuck you to him. He deserves it. You look hot and happy.”

I shook my head at her as I looked at it again. The little bubbles popped up indicating he was typing a message, then they stopped. I froze, waiting to see if he would respond. The bubbles started bouncing again, then his message came through.

My breath caught in my throat. I could feel my eyes stinging with tears.

“I’m glad to see she’s doing ok. You two have fun at the art fundraiser. Sorry I can’t be there like I planned.”

“What is it?” Lauren asked as she jumped up to walk toward me.

I handed the phone back to her, “He replied.”

I scoffed, grabbing my shoes to put them on. Wondering how he knew about the art fundraiser as I did so. I assumed he saw the dress shop post making the rounds on his fan accounts. Lauren stood there with her mouth agape. Looking from me to the message on her phone. She started typing again but I shook my head quickly.

“No. Please don’t talk to him. At least not while you're around me. I don’t wanna know anything he says.”

She gave me a sympathetic look, but then nodded at me as she put her phone away. “Alright. I hear you.”

“Let’s go. I don’t want you to be late,” I said, changing the subject.

We took an Uber over to the venue. I was surprised to find several paps outside waiting, because of course they were. They started yelling questions at me as soon as I stepped out of the car. Some of them tried flattery, telling me how nice I looked, before hitting me with questions about why Dieter wasn’t there with me. Lauren and I did our best to ignore them as we walked inside.

We made a beeline to see Lauren’s painting first. True to her style, it was bright and colorful. An open field full of different types of wildflowers framed by a setting sun. The intricate details of each flower were amazing. I, of course, showered her in praise as she turned beet red.

After that, we made our way around that exhibit, chatting with various people as we went. I was surprised when we bumped into Alex as we were walking into the next section. I couldn’t tell if he was surprised to be running into us or not. He gave me a nervous smile, seemingly not knowing how to act around me. I guessed that was normal, given the circumstances with his older brother. I tried to act like he was any other friend, smiling as I pulled him in for a quick hug and a polite hello.

“I didn’t know you would be here,” I said as we pulled away from one another.

“Yeah, I actually have a charcoal drawing on display,” he said, somewhat shyly.

“Oh yeah, what is it? I’ll have to make sure I go see it.” I gave him an encouraging smile.

“It’s the… massive elephant drawing.” He motioned with his hands to indicate its size.

“Cool, I love elephants. I bet it’s amazing.” A slight tinge of red formed on his cheeks.

Lauren stood next to me, a shy smile on her face, glancing between Alex and me.

“Lauren was telling me not long ago she wanted to learn more about charcoal drawing. You should tell her more about that.”

Their eyes darted over to each other, an odd smile playing at the edges of both of their lips. I stood there, giving them a questioning look when I heard someone call my name. It drew my attention away from my thoughts as I turned to see who it was. The tall blonde figure approached me, coming in for a quick hug.

“Max, the DJ, right?” I said with a joking tone. He laughed.

“I thought that was you. It’s so weird seeing you here. I just saw Dieter in New York yesterday.”

I grimaced slightly before answering, “Oh, yeah? Well, I’m happy you two got to catch up again so soon.”

“Yeah, he mentioned you guys aren't together anymore. I’m sorry to hear that. I really thought you were going to be different for him. He’s such a fucking idiot to mess that one up.” He gave a nervous laugh.

“Yeah, well, shit happens, I guess. So, you’re into art?” I asked, attempting to change the subject.

“Not really. I have a friend that has a painting on display. Just here for support.”

He shook his head as his eyes darted around my face. I had a feeling he was about to hit on me, and I hoped that wasn’t the case.

“So uhh, what are you doing after this? You free?” He didn’t seem anywhere near as confident as he did the first time I had met him.

I gave him a small laugh, “I think that's a loaded question.” My eyes started to dart around to look anywhere but at him. I noticed Lauren and Alex’s eyes on us. They were definitely listening.

“I’m not really looking to start anything new right now if that’s what you're asking.”

“Of course. I totally understand. Well, if you change your mind, give me a call.” He pulled a business card out of the inside pocket of his blazer and handed it to me. “It was good to see you again. You look beautiful tonight.” He leaned in and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before walking off.

I had a feeling that I had a serious look of annoyance and agitation on my face as I watched him walk away. I turned my head to look over at Lauren and Alex, who were both trying not to laugh.

“What the actual fuck was that?” I asked them, to which they finally started laughing.

“I guess since you're good enough for the biggest star in Hollywood, they all want a piece of you now,” Lauren said jokingly.

“That’s not fucking funny,” I said sternly.

“I’m totally telling my brother that happened. He needs to know other men are already moving in. He fucked up.”

I turned to look at Alex directly in the eyes, a little taken aback by that statement. He wasn’t usually so blunt. Hell, he typically didn’t say much to me at all. I wasn’t sure if I should laugh or cry. I gave him a tight smile and looked away. I was feeling some sort of emotion I couldn’t really decipher.

“Well, I don’t wanna interrupt you two and your art talk. I’m gonna go see the rest of the paintings. I’ll catch up with you later.”

I walked away, inhaling deeply as I went. Trying to steady my emotions before I lost control of them. I was being hit from all sides when it came to Dieter. I wasn’t sure how much more I could take. I was so ready for the day to be over.

I made my way around the next exhibit of paintings, attempting to get lost in the pieces and not think about everything that had happened that day. Halfway through that section, I came to a large painting that immediately caught my attention. There was something familiar about it that caused a lump to form in my throat.

The painting was of a man and woman silhouetted in front of a swirl of gray and dark purple night sky. Stars were scattered around the background. One star shone brighter than the rest, just over the woman’s head. A blue fog surrounded them. The man’s face was completely in the shadows, but the woman’s was just slightly visible. I looked down to read the informational sheet posted below the frame and my breath caught in my throat.

Painting Name: La estrella del norte: La luz en la oscuridad (The North Star: The Light in the Darkness)

Description: The North Star is the light in the darkness that leads lost souls home.

Submitted By: Anonymous

I could feel my heart racing as I read through the information sheet multiple times. It took me several minutes to fully process what it said. Is that what he had been saying to me this whole time? I could feel my breath going shallow as I took it in. For the first time in months, I felt like I was going to have a full blown panic attack. I put my fingers up to the bridge of my nose and squeezed, begging the tears not to come.

“Fuck.” I said a little too loudly as I inhaled deeply, still trying to catch my breath. I could feel the stares from the people standing nearby and it felt like the room was closing in on me. I needed to get out of there. I walked away as fast as I could, attempting to find some space where there weren’t any people around. When I passed by Lauren and Alex, she followed right behind me, grabbing my arm to stop me.

“Are you ok?” She asked with a look of concern on her face.

“I gotta get out of here. I can’t take anymore today.”

I pulled my arm away from her and made my way toward one of the side exits. As soon as I was outside, I leaned against the wall, sucking the fresh air in as deeply as I could. It didn’t help with the lightheaded feeling I had, nor to steady my legs that suddenly felt weak, and it took everything I had in me not to crumble to the ground in tears.

After several minutes passed, I finally managed to get my breathing under control. I pulled out my phone to get an Uber so I could go home. Several frantic text messages from Lauren were on my lock screen, asking what was wrong and where I was right now. I briefly mentioned the painting and said I was going home, then continued with my original task of getting a ride.

Luckily, I didn’t get a chatty driver and made it home without any further drama. I briefly considered having the driver stop by the liquor store but managed to talk myself out of it. Once I was back into my safe space, the anxious feeling that had been lingering seemed impossible to shake off. I felt like I needed to further purge Dieter from my life for good.

I changed into my pajamas and went downstairs to my craft room. Staring at the painting I had started for Dieter, I realized it was all wrong. The colors were too bright and there were too many cheerful details. It needed to be darker, because at this point, we were both lost. I turned on some music, reached for a couple of tubes of darker paint, and went to work.

I started by covering the colorful sunrise with the dark night sky, using shades of navy and black, adding the glowing moon and stars of all shapes and sizes throughout. Including the most important one, the North Star. Once I was satisfied with the background, I began reworking the images in the foreground. I started by darkening the curtains over the window that framed the night sky. In front of the window was the surface of a dark wood table with a vase of three white roses and a gramophone, like the one at the house in Sonoma, now sitting bathed in moonlight. I darkened the colors on those items as well, but also gave them a soft ethereal glow.

It was a simple piece, but it packed in a lot of personal meaning. The white roses seemed to be a common theme between Dieter and me. Remembering that he mentioned the topic, I had looked into the meanings of flowers a little more while I was planning this project. White roses being a symbol of new beginnings still seemed to fit the current situation. They also meant everlasting love and eternal loyalty. As badly as he had hurt me, I knew a part of me would always love him and be loyal to him. Whether I wanted it or not. I also learned that the number of flowers often had meaning too. Three roses simply meant “I love you”.

The gramophone represented one of my favorite memories of us dancing to the sounds of the old antique when we were in Sonoma. I had gathered it was also something his parents would often happily do as well. So, I knew it would have double meaning for him.

I had originally planned to use the morning sunrise for the background. It reminded me of the first time he said he loved me, and wanted us to be together, as we laid in bed during the early morning hours. However, I now felt the dark night sky was more appropriate for so many reasons. We had been laying in the grass looking at the stars when I told him that I loved him for the first time. I wanted to remind him of my love as many ways as I could. Then of course, there was the fact that he had been calling me his North Star, which was the most prominent fixture in the background aside from the moon. I wanted him to know that I now understood what those words meant. I would always be his light in the darkness, and he needed to know that. So, with a little help from google, I signed the bottom right side of the painting with Tu Estrella del Norte (Your North Star). I continued to do final touches to the painting throughout the next week. Making sure it was the way I wanted it before I finally decided it was complete. (More after the image)

For the last round of Dieter’s mini home makeover, new furniture was scheduled to be delivered at the end of that week. Despite having reconsidered this earlier, I decided I would go ahead and handle it myself as planned. He was scheduled to be back in Canada for filming this week, so I wasn’t worried about him being there. Luckily the movers were quick at their jobs and got everything placed where I wanted in record time. After they left, I added the last few finishing touches of artwork and sculptures Lauren had curated for him. The last piece to go up was my painting. It would be the focal piece of the room. The darker colors I had switched to ended up working perfectly with the new color palette.

After I was done setting up everything, I went out to my car and grabbed the boxes of his personal belongings that I had packed at my house. I left them sitting on the counter in the kitchen, along with his house key and credit card. I took a few minutes to walk around, getting one last look at the place that had so quickly become my second home. Silently saying my final goodbyes to him as I made my way toward the front door. As I locked the door and closed it behind me, I felt a sense of relief after having fully purged him from my life once and for all. It also gave me some closure knowing that I was still able to say what I needed to him, without using any words at all - even if I didn’t get to do it that night over the phone. A/N: Anyone in tears yet? The painting thing hits the feels hard. Digital art is not one of my strengths, so forgive my poor attempt at creating the painting, but it gives you an idea of what I was going for. It looks better in my head. 🤣 For next chapter... we get asshole dieter and an interesting interaction with Lauren (which @for-a-longlongtime is still laughing about). I will post a teaser early next week and the chapter will follow as soon as final edits are done. Also, a big thank you to @for-a-longlongtime for working her magic beta skills on this chapter and putting up with me. She made it hit the feels so much harder with her edits.

We are going to hit rock bottom for Dieter starting in Chapter 24 and it's going to be rough. So, consider this your warning to start preparing. I'm not paying for your therapy bills, but happy to schedule a support group meeting afterwards. 🥴🤣 As always, please share your thoughts and theories. You know I'm a sucker for them. 💜 After you check out the chapter mood board (with a picture of the dress) included below, hope on over to this Today's Musings post to learn more about what is going on in Talia's head. Next Chapter

Tag List: @rhoorl @bitchwitch1981 @readingiskeepingmegoing @runningmom94 @for-a-longlongtime @hisandsnakes @chaoticfestninja @survivingandenduring @partyofone3413 @cakipy-blog @titlee78 @poodlebae @guelyury @weho2kcmo @missladym1981 @maried01 @pedrostories

Let me know in the comments below if you would like to be added to the tag list.

#dieter bravo #pedro pascal #dieter x ofc #dieter bravo fic #Destiny & Deliverance Series #pedro pascal characters #dieter bravo x ofc #pedro pascal character fanfic #pedro pascal fanfiction #Pedro Pascal Fanfic #dieter bravo x oc #dieter bravo fluff #dieter bravo fanfiction #pedro pascal smut #the bubble

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racinggirl · 1 year

Text

butterfly || Daniel Ricciardo 3

part of the 700 celebration drabbles!

words: 1.1k I'm honestly the worst at staying below 1k words, sorry not sorry. I hope you enjoy! let me know what you think please, I LOVE comments, your opinions, anything. It makes my heart happy :) You can also leave opinions about the drabble in my askbox anonymously :) also, this is a repost because tumblr didn’t want to share this fic with you :(

(as a part of my 700 followers celebration, I'm taking requests for drabbles, check this post for more information)

3 years. 3 years you and your boyfriend have been able to keep your relationship hidden, away from the fans, social media, press. Those years of having a secret relationship weren’t the easiest, and things all changed the moment that secret relationship wasn’t so secret anymore.

You and Daniel were the perfect couple, going on sneaky dates at each other’s houses. You’d prepare a meal at your place, put a matrass on the ground, a blanket on top of it to prevent stains on the matrass. The moment he’d walk into your house in Monaco – the place you both lived – you were hiding with a water gun, leaving the second one near the front door with a note attached to it.

‘The first one to get SOAKED must do the dishes’

That was you and him, funny, happy, but in secret. You hated the media, not only because they were around you all the time, but also because of the fake news they would spread. Anything to get that million-dollar headline.

You were a singer, not lady gaga famous yet, but you were getting there. Small steps, slowly building your fanbase. Another reason you absolutely tried everything to prevent the media from finding out you and Daniel were madly in love with one another. You wanted to do it on your own. You wanted to become famous, sing like an angel, and have people love you because you were you, and not because you were Daniel’s girlfriend.

And boy, he adored that so much about you. Your strength, your power, and your determination to keep going, get higher up, be the best you could be. Independent, yet you couldn’t be away from each other.

However, the moment those pictures leaked, you noticed your fanbase growing. Most people would love it because this meant being successful was one step closer. It was withing hand reach. Most people, but not you.

Talks with your manager, talks with his manager, and most importantly, talks with each other. You were stressing so much, scared because you didn’t want to go in the books as ‘girlfriend of’. You were scared people would like you because you were dating Daniel, and not because they actually enjoyed your music.

‘’Baby.’’ Daniel reached for your hands, giving them a gentle squeeze as you looked up into his eyes, his bright shiny eyes that would clear up the thunder in your head instantly.

‘’What if they don’t like me, what if they think I’m not good enough for you and nobody will listen to my songs?’’ You were rambling, it was something you always did whenever you were nervous or scared, and right now, you were both.

‘’What if they do like me, but only because I’m your girlfriend, because liking me means liking you, and they don’t actually like me, but they like you. And what if when I need to perform somewhere, nobody wants to come?’’ You ask, worry shooting out of your eyes as you looked up at your boyfriend.

‘’What if people want to break us apart? Or worse, hate us together? I don’t want people to hate us, I love us, do you love us? You love me, right?’’ Your worried frown was something that broke the Australian’s heart. He saw you were stressed, worried, which made him care about you even more than he could possibly do.

‘’I love you, to pieces, so much, my angel.’’ He whispered, his hands on either side of your face, forcing you to look him in the eyes, those shiny, perfect eyes.

‘’I couldn’t possibly love anyone more than I love you. And please, please know that whatever happened right now, won’t change anything okay? There might be people that hate, they are always there, it’s inevitable. But my star, you, are worth so much more than any hate comment there is on this world, okay? We will get through this. I will come to your shows, just like you came to my races, even if it meant arriving separately and sneaking around in the McLaren motorhome.’’ He said, and he meant every single word of it.

‘’You know what I always say, right?’’ He smiles, rubbing your cold cheeks with his warm hands, creating tingles in your stomach.

You hummed, nodding in response as your eyes closed slowly. He knew you, even better than he knew the Melbourne circuit. He knew exactly what to say and how to calm you, and you couldn’t thank him more for that.

Months later you were stepping into the Abu Dhabi paddock, your hand intertwined with Daniel’s, his warm hand being a perfect fit for yours. A lot of things had changed, you had grown, both as a singer but even more so as an individual and a couple. You were out and public, for everyone to see, and you owned it.

You couldn’t thank that moment enough, because due to that moment, you and Daniel had become even closer than ever, taking the opportunity to do things together, even more so. Starting your own podcast, you dedicating your songs to him and him dedicating his successes to you. It felt like a fairy tale, and it was even better than Snow white or Cinderella.

‘’y/n! Daniel! So wonderful to see you both here.’’ One of the interviewers noticed your appearance and didn’t hesitate twice to come up to you.

‘’Tell us, how are things, we heard you’ve been working on a new album?’’ That question was directed towards you, and Daniel’s smile grew even wider when you started answering the question.

‘’That sounds amazing, do you have a name for the album? Are there songs dedicated to Daniel?’’ The questions you once feared – because the questions weren’t just about you but included Daniel in it as well – were now reality, and you weren’t scared of them anymore. Because you didn’t see it as you versus him, or you versus the world. No, you saw it as you and him versus anything that was going to be put on your path, good or bad. You’d do it together.

‘’There are some songs in there that represent our relationship, yes.’’ You smiled, giving your boyfriends hand a gentle squeeze. ‘’And the name, it’s called ‘butterfly’.’’

‘’That’s a beautiful name, is it based on anything?’’

You smiled at the interviewer, your gaze moving upwards to meet Daniel’s eyes. ‘’Yeah, it is.’’ You smiled. ‘’Because you know… always…’’

‘’Enjoy the butterflies.’’ Daniel finished your sentence, pressing a gentle kiss on your temple as his arm wrapped around you. Yeah, you and him against the world, forever.

#f1 #formula 1 #formula one #f1 imagines #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 x reader #daniel ricciardo x reader #daniel ricciardo imagines #daniel ricciardo imagine #daniel ricciardo #daniel ricciardo fic #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 imagine

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lucy90712 · 1 month

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Only here to party- Pedri

Deciding to study abroad was a hard decision to make but I knew it was best for me to move off the island and broaden my horizons by moving to England. As much as studying abroad was a good idea studying biology has turned out to be a bad decision I barely have any free time I never get to go out and I can never come home as I am always so busy. However now that the year has come to an end and it's summer break I can finally go home for a couple months and boy am I ready to have the best summer ever.

I am going to make this summer the best few months of my life I want to spend nearly every day with my friends and go out as much as possible. The entire summer is going to be about going out and having fun not a single mention of university and definitely no boys. I tried dating a guy at university but he cheated on me with multiple people one being one of my friends so unless I don't want to get involved with any boys. Heartbreak is not on my to do list and I've told my friends to not let me get attached and they will definitely stick to that as they can be harsh with me when they need to be.

After getting back yesterday tonight is our first girls night out and I couldn't be more excited. I've spent pretty much all day getting ready I woke up late as I was tried from my flight but after that I showered, washed my hair, shaved pretty much everything. It's been a long while since I got dressed up at all but I still have all of my dresses and nice makeup which are definitely going to get a lot of use these next few months. I was really feeling myself so I picked my absolute favourite dress I own it's a bit short and quite form fitting but I want to look and feel good so I don't really care what anyone else thinks about me. I'm not one for wearing much makeup but I decided to put on a bit more than I usually would as I was feeling adventurous.

It took me a good while but once I was ready I got my shoes on and made my way to the club which is only just down the road from my place so I decided to walk. The rest of the girls live a bit further out so we agreed to meet at the club as they were all coming together. Just as I got to the club a taxi pulled up with all of my friends in, we hadn't seen each other since I left last summer so there was a lot of hugs and a lot of catching up we need to do.

"You look gorgeous girl that post break up glow is making you look magical" one of my friends said

"All the guys in the club are going to be looking at you" another added

"Thank you guys you all look amazing too but remember I don't want to be involved with any new guy so if you see me getting too close with someone stop me" I said

"You got it girl no men we won't let you get hurt again" my best friend said

We headed into the club and I was dragged straight to the bar to get a drink or maybe two whatever it takes to get me slightly tipsy. I'm not here to get drunk out of my mind I just want to have some fun and enjoy my life as I haven't done that in nearly a year. It was clear very quickly that there was a lot of guys in the club were staring at me but I didn't take any notice some of them were cute but not cute enough for me to change the one rule I set for myself this summer. My friends however are not following the same rules as me so they all quickly ran off to find a guy that took their fancy. That left me alone but it didn't bother me I can handle myself as I'm used to doing that when I'm back in England. I decided to dance for a bit and found my best friend on the dance floor so we danced together for a bit but at some point she went to the bathroom and never came back but I saw her talking to some guy that was definitely her type so I left her be.

Seeing as the group had broken apart I took myself back to the bar to just sit and watch over them all just to make sure nothing bad happened. As I was watching the dance floor I made eye contact with a guy who sent me a smile. He was very attractive exactly my type with his brown eyes and hair and his slight beard that somehow made his features stand out even more. I quickly realised I was staring at him and stopped myself because I could feel myself being drawn to him but I don't want to find someone to get attached to. He clearly noticed my staring as the next thing I knew he was taking a seat next to me at the bar and flashing that smile that drew my attention in the first place.

"Hey I'm Pedro can I buy you a drink?" He asked

"Sure I'm y/n by the way" I said

He ordered another of what I had drunk before and a drink of his own and we were also given free food.

"You must be well known here to get free things" I joked

"Wait you don't recognise me" he said

"No am I supposed to" I said

"No it's just most people here seem to know who I am" he said

"Well now I need to know I feel left out" I laughed

"I'm a footballer for Barcelona and for Spain I go by a nickname though the name Pedri might be more familiar to you" he said

"I have heard that name but I'm not into football sorry to bruise your ego" I said

"I like it people who don't care who I am are much more fun to be around" he smiled

We continued talking he asked about my life and once I told him I was studying in England there was a lot he wanted to know. I asked him a few questions about his life as it's not everyday you meet a footballer especially in Tenerife but he wanted to focus the conversation on me. It was quite clear that there was a connection between us and really to stick to my rules I should stop talking to him but I can't help myself. It would feel wrong to leave this here and not give Pedri a chance especially as both of us don't live in Tenerife so it's not like we could run into each other once I think I'm ready to date again. Sometimes our plans don't line up with what the universe has set out for us and I don't want to ruin something that could go somewhere even if we only end up as friends Pedri is a cool person to be friends with.

One by one my friends came to find me and say they were leaving with whoever they had met leaving me with Pedri. So much for them stopping me from getting attached to someone but honestly I kind of appreciate it I definitely would've fought them if they tried to take me away from Pedri. Once we reached the early hours of the morning both of us wanted to go home Pedri offered to walk me home and I wasn't going to say no to spending more time with him so we walked down the road together. As we got to the door I was starting to wish I lived further from the club so I could spend more time with Pedri.

"I know both of us won't be here for long so can I have your number I'd love to see you again before we both leave" he asked

"Of course give me your phone and I'll put my number in" I said

I did just that and once I had put my number in we said goodbye and Pedri promised he'd text me in the morning.

~~~~~~~~~~

This summer has flown by I have been back home for 2 months but I leave again in a few days and I'm really sad about it. My summer has gone completely differently to how I imagined it would too I was expecting to spend time mostly with my friends out at the beach most days and then going out drinking on the weekends but I have done that like 3 times. I have seen my friends and spent time on the beach but I've spent more of my time with Pedri. When I told my friends about Pedri they weren't shocked that I broke my rule in fact they told me that they saw me with him and were going to drag me away but once they saw how happy I was they let me be. If it wasn't for them I probably wouldn't have spent as much time as I have with Pedri they were the ones to tell me to just go for it and see where things go as I won't get another chance like this and that turned out to be good advice.

Pedri and I have spent so much time together we've seen each other nearly every day and we text each other constantly. In the last month we have been on a few dates all of which have been amazing. Whenever we spend time with our friends they are always telling us to get a room as we are pretty much attached at the hip, Pedri has developed a habit of having his hand on my waist pretty much at all times which I'm not complaining about as I love it. Over the last two months I've really fallen for Pedri and I'd like to think he feels the same way the trouble is we both have to leave at some point and I don't know if things will be the same when we can't see each other all the time.

Today is the last day Pedri and I can see each other has we both leave in a few days so we need some time to pack. He invited me to his for the day as he has a pool so we can swim together and just sit outside in the sun all day. Pedri wanted me to come over early so I had to drag myself out of bed and to his place but it was worth it as he had breakfast ready for both of us and he greeted me with a kiss which always makes my morning better.

After having some breakfast we both got into swimwear and got into the pool. More often than not we don't really do any swimming we just float around in the water and today was no different. I leant against the side in the shallowest part of the pool as that's where I can touch the bottom and Pedri stood in front of me with his arms around my waist. His hair was wet but somehow he still looked incredible possibly better than he looks on any normal day which is saying something. We were just staring at each other sharing the odd kiss but I could tell Pedri was thinking about something he had the look in his eye that I've learnt means he's deep in thought considering something.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked

"Oh nothing just daydreaming" he said

"I know that's a lie you have that thinking expression of yours tell me what's on your mind" I said

"What's going to happen to us when we both leave?" He asked

This is the question I have been thinking about myself and dreading having to answer. I don't want to end things with Pedri but is long distance going to work. I'm always so busy and I know he is too so will we even get to see each other and if we don't will we just fall out of love. There is so many questions and most of which we won't know the answer to unless we give things a try.

"I don't know I really like you and I've enjoyed these last two months more than the rest of the last year but we would have to be long distance" I said

"I know it won't be easy but if you are willing to I'd love to try long distance I don't just want to let what we have go this feels special more than just a holiday romance" he said

"If you're willing to give it a go then so am I but we need to communicate well and be ready not to see each other that often" I said

"I will do anything to make this work we can FaceTime every night and any breaks we have we can visit each other we can make this work" he said

"Then let's do it" I said

"First though I have something I want to ask" he said

"What's that" I questioned

"Will you be my girlfriend?" He asked

"I would love to" I replied leaning in to kiss him

#pedri imagines #pedri x reader #pedri imagine #pedri #football imagine

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atschoolunfortunetly · 6 months

Text

A Very Long and Very Rage Written Rant about people talking about the FNAF Movie because I am seeing some takes that make me want to bash my head into a wall.

Very quickly an apology to my followers on here that followed me for Sonic. I would post this on my main but if you read my username I don't really have the time to do that right now. Very sorry for clogging up your TL.

Anyway, I am about to use very aggressive and targeted language. I am not hating on anyone specific but I am going to be saying sentences like "Are you dumb? Why are you like this?" Tumblr is my void and I am going to scream. I know some of the things I say may not be common knowledge. However, in this rant, I am going to pretend that it is. I am going to swear a lot. I am going to be talking about fist-fighting people whom I disagree with.

Just know that once again, this is a rant. Not a "please stop saying blah blah blah blah." I am not going to go out of my way to attack people. Which is, once again, why I am screaming here.

"Why the big warning?" BECAUSE SOME PEOPLE ON MY MAIN BACK WHEN I COMPLAINED ABOUT PEOPLE COMPLAINING ABOUT THE RED EYES YELLED AT ME. MY POST WASN'T MEANT TO TARGET ANYONE SPECIFIC. I WAS MEANT TO BE YELLING AT A MADE-UP DUMMY I MADE IN MY MIND!

With that out of the way, it is time to scream.

OH MY FUCKING GOD SOME OF THE THINGS YA'LL ARE SAYING. I have never felt the urge to rip through my fucking screen and grab some of yall by the throat. I want to bodyslam you onto the ground and pummel you to death.

Let's begin with a recent complaint I saw about William having no motivation in the movie and how they should have given him his motivation, let me tell you something bud.

They did. They did give him his motive. However, this is a 2-hour movie and they didn't dive into it. It's almost like they're making a second movie or something? OH WAIT THEY ARE! THIS IS THE FIRST MOVIE! THEY ARE ESTABLISHING ROLES!

They want you to grasp from this movie that:

William is a threat.

Mike is doing his best and is not going to pick up on everything.

Abby and the missing kids are, indeed, regular-ass kids who aren't going to understand fully the situation they're in.

Vanessa is a traumatized individual who wants to please her father and was manipulated into helping him because, you know, THAT IS HER DAD.

They are setting up the basics so people know what to expect from the next film. They will, most likely, be going into William's motives then. But as of right now, they are setting the roles that each character is going to take.

I don't know how some of yall ain't getting that because it is the most clear as day thing to me but that may be because I am aiming to be a writer down the line.

Time to aim at the other complaint I've seen which is that Vanessa is an Afton complaint. All I have to say to that is, whoah, it's almost like the movie takes place in an alt-universe from the games. And even if Vanessa is an Afton in the games who gives a fuck? She isn't Williams's direct child if that's the case and it just ties her in with the old characters. A popular thing I have seen a couple of times is that sometimes people portray Gregory as an Afton. So what's so wrong about Vanessa being an Afton. I am genuinely curious here? What's wrong about her being an Afton.

Some of yall come up with the most stupidest ass complaints I swear to god.

"But Micheal is meant to be the Afton-" Tell me how that would have worked in this movie. Tell me how Mike would not have recognized his own father if he was William. Also, I like that the movie implies that his dad is probably Henry.

"How does it imply that?"

I don't know, why don't we look at the career office scene again where William reads Mike's last name and recognizes it. He wants to tie up his loose ends.

And Mike? Mike is a loose end.

It just makes sense and it goes into the last complaint I saw about the movie.

The "I always come back line doesn't make sense," complaint.

THE REASON WHY IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE TO YOU IS THAT YOU KEEP PLACING IT IN THE WRONG CONTEXT YOU FOOL, YOU ABSOLUTE BAFOON. YOU'RE PLACING IT IN THE GAME'S CONTEXT. NOT THE MOVIES.

If I am fucking right about the fact that Henry is a Schmidt in the movie then that means William has always been a part of Mike's life. He has been haunting Mike since he took Garret, he influenced Mike to get a job at Freddy's, and he was the reason why Mike met Vanessa.

When he said he'd come back, he wasn't talking about coming back from the dead.

He meant it as he'll come back and make Mike's life a living hell.

Anyway rant fucking over, yall pisses me off. Good day.

#sorry for fnaf posting #fnaf #fnaf sb #fnaf movie #fnaf movie spoilers #five nights at freddy's #Five Nights at Freddy's Movie #Mike schmidt #william afton #fnaf vanessa #fnaf vanny #fnaf gregory #fnaf abby #vanessa afton #rant #I loved the movie #hate yall though #/j

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 5 months

Note

AITA for inquiring after a blog that got deleted?

This happened several months ago and my friends have told me that I wasn't in the wrong, but my stupid anxiety keeps bringing it up and saying actually they only told me that because they like me. Maybe the judgement of strangers will finally get my brain to put it to rest. Repliers, please use she/her pronouns only for me, I don't like being called by they/them.

I'm keeping this vague to respect the privacy of the others involved; if you somehow recognize the situation, please do not give further details. Feel free to ask for clarification if something is confusing, but I will not be providing additional information like what fandom it was as I believe that would just risk revealing who was involved, and I can't think of any additional info that would affect someone's judgement of what I did. I would like judgement of what I did without risking violating anyone else involved's privacy. Also, sorry this is so long. It's the ADHD. I hate it too.

I'm relating the dms involved as closely as I can, but they won't be word-for-word.

I follow several roleplay blogs in the same fandom. One day I noticed one that I particularly liked seemed to have been deleted. I wasn't sure if they'd made a goodbye post I didn't see before deleting or something, so I made a post asking if anyone knew if something had happened with their mod, as it seemed to come out of nowhere to me. No one ever interacted with this post, but I have no way of knowing if people saw it.

I messaged a blog that I had seen interact with them a lot asking something like "hey, do you know if something happened with [blog]'s mod? I noticed they had deleted and was wondering if something happened." They replied with the single word "no" and I thanked them and apologized for bothering them. This one word was the only thing they ever said to me. I took this to mean that they didn't know if anything had happened, but didn't try to investigate further. I was vaguely concerned that they seemed to have suddenly disappeared without anyone knowing, but it wasn't my place to try and dig things up.

A couple days later I was scrolling back through a different blog and I noticed an old post they'd reblogged from the person who deleted's sideblog, and the sideblog had also been deleted. I sent a dm asking something like "Hey, I noticed [blog] and [sideblog] were both deleted, and was wondering if you knew if the mod was alright" and received a response just saying that no one wanted to make what happened public, least of all the mod. I thanked them for responding, apologized for prying, and said I hoped things were alright, then deleted my post asking if anyone knew what had happened, so that people couldn't stumble on it, get curious, and try and pry themselves.

Very shortly after, I received an anonymous ask scolding me for prying into the mod's business when they wanted things kept quiet and continuing after being told no. I posted the anon and explained that I hadn't meant to pry - just was wondering if things were okay - and that I must have misinterpreted that first "no", apologized if I'd made anyone uncomfortable, and made it clear I would absolutely not ask further. That was the end of it, at least as far as I know.

I think I might be the asshole because: I didn't know the mod, we'd never talked beyond their answering some of my asks, but I asked people about them anyways. I was genuinely wondering if they were okay and was careful not to ask what happened, but I know I can have trouble finding the line between normal and nosy, and maybe messaging two people was too far, even if the first person seemed to not know anything.

I think I might not be the asshole because: I wasn't asking for details on what happened, I was just wondering if they were okay or if I'd missed a goodbye post, and backed off immediately after being told it was private. I don't think it's really my fault that I misinterpreted the first person saying "no" to me asking if they knew if something had happened, since I thought they were literally answering my question.

Again, please do not try to figure out who was involved in this if you think you recognize it; I just want my brain to stop turning this damn situation over and over and maybe having strangers judge it will do that.

So. AITA for asking after someone who deleted their roleplay blog?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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navstuffs · 7 months

Text

The Lady in Red

Pairing: Ada Wong x GN!Reader

Summary: The Lady in Red asks you to dance. Based on the song "The Lady in Red" by Chris de Burgh.

Warnings tags: reader has low self-esteem, shy and nervous!reader (so self-indulgent, id tremble in front of this woman), angsty-ish, ada being ada

Author's Notes: IT IS ADA WONG DAY! to celebrate i decided to post this very special fic with her song on her day. enjoy!!

"The lady in red is dancing with me, (...) There's nobody here It's just you and me It's where I want to be But I hardly know this beauty by my side I'll never forget the way you look tonight"

(Chris de Burgh - The Lady in Red)

She enters through the doors at precisely 9:35 p.m. She might be able to enter unnoticed, but all eyes are on her as she takes off her coat, revealing a red dress today. You wonder why that color means so much to her, but you are (again) too nervous to even glance in her direction. You don't want to be considered a perverted, like all the other guys who tried to flirt with her.

She always wears red: either a social shirt, a dress, or a jacket, the Lady in Red makes justice to her nickname. The only other color you saw her wear was black, always with some sort of red in her outfit.

She sits alone by her usual stool, three down from yours, as the bartender places the regular tall glass of Martini in front of her. She has no company; Lady in Red is always alone when she appears. You always expect some sort of model boyfriend or girlfriend to appear and stop your curiosity or any chance you could consider having, but Lady in Red is always alone. Not in the sense of loneliness (like you), but alone by choice. You watched her as weeks passed, man after man denied a dance, a phone number, and even a "hello." You don't think badly of her, obviously not, some men could be real jerks.

You sigh, turning your attention to the drink in front of you. There is a loud group of men at your side, celebrating some sort of office party, who seem to ignore your presence. You were never that interesting where people would glance twice at you. A commotion starts behind you when another man joins the group, to which they call the boss, and in the excitement, one guy accidentally bumps against your back.

"Sorry." He says after ignoring you completely.

You shake your head, unaware of the person joining your side. You quickly look to see the Lady in Red placing her cup near you as she sits down. You gulp, looking around as some sort of joke or prank.

"You wouldn't mind if I sit over here, would you?" Her voice is smooth as she turns to look at you. She was even prettier up close, with soft porcelain skin and lip gloss on her pink lips. Short, straight hair parted to one side, dark as the night without stars. Your mouth opens and closes a few times before clearing your throat.

"Not at all. Not really expecting anyone, anyway." You add, wanting to hit yourself in the head. She smiles, satisfied, before taking a small sip of her drink.

"Having a rough night?"

"Does it look that obvious?"

"Just a little." She jokes, and you nod, defeated. The day you come to the bar exhausted, looking at your worst, is when the Lady in Red joins you. Perfect.

"I promise you I don't look like this every day." You defend yourself, which is a lie "Just most of the time."

"I see."

"Not all of us can look insanely pretty and perfect all the time, you know?" Your flirtatious joke doesn't go unnoticed as she smiles back, reassuring it is all good.

"My condolences to them. And to you." She raises her cup, taking another sip. You toast back, laughing. So, besides looking extremely beautiful and charming, she had a sense of humor.

The loud group at your side decides to go to the dance floor. You don't notice as Lady in Red's eyes follow them. She then asks a question that would have made you spill your drink if you had any in your mouth.

"Would you like to dance?"

You freeze, looking at her face for any sight of a joke. There is none. She seems serious, waiting for your answer. You look at the improvised small dance floor, almost packed with drunk men, and look back at her. You better answer before she runs out of patience, you think, nodding in response.

All eyes are on you as Ada leads you to the dance floor. You can't believe your luck. You probably will look ridiculous with her, tired and awful, as Lady in Red looks perfect at your side, not one single hair out of place, dress hugging all her curves. It almost seems wrong someone so stunning like her dancing with someone so, so like you.

"I must warn you: I don't dance."

"Good. I don't either." Lady in Red closes the distance between your body, getting awfully close. The song is a happy beat, and the drunk men don't seem to care about your presence. Good. You do your best to avoid stepping on Ada's feet as she dances flawlessly to the music.

When the song ends, and another slower ballad starts playing, you begin to leave the dance floor back to your stool, but Lady in Red stops you, her hand in your arm.

"You don't have to leave just yet. If you don't want to." She whispers near your ear, bringing goosebumps to your body. You don't want to leave: get as close as possible to The Lady in Red. You want to bury your head on your neck, hiding yourself from the world. Have your hands travel her body; feel her against your skin. You want to be intimate, fall in love with Lady in Red, and hope she falls in love with you back. Even if it was just for that night.

For someone who said she couldn't dance, you are thankful Lady in Red is there leading you, or else you would have hit against a chair or someone else. You are close now enough to feel her warm breath against her skin. Close to see how brown were her eyes, her lips parted. You want to ask her why she chose you over all the other people. There must be someone as unique as her in that place, and you weren't that one.

The magical moment is broken when one of the drunk guys spills his beer over your back, wetting your shirt. You let go of Lady in Red, startled. At least, it didn't seem no beer was spilled on her.

"Shit. I'm sorry about that. I guess I will go to the bathroom to try to clean up."

"I will be waiting for you." She answers, smiling as a promise. You smile back, feeling flustered like a teenager again. As you walk toward the bathroom, you look at her again, still standing in the middle of the dance floor, her eyes locked in your direction.

Like a damn illusion.

After using some paper to dry most of your back, you look at yourself in the mirror: you look terrible, and you have no idea why Lady in Red took interest in you. But no time for self-pity. You throw water in your face, fixing yourself the best you can. If she had found any interest in you, she probably had a good reason for it.

She isn't on the dance floor when you return from the bathroom. Fair enough, you think, she probably didn't want to stay around the drunk men. You look toward her usual seat at the bar counter, but she isn't there. You walk quickly, searching for her at the occupied tables. Maybe she found someone attractive, though she is nowhere to be seen. You even attempt to go outside, but it would make you look like a creep. If she had left, she probably had a good reason for it.

You fall into your stool, convinced your magical moment is over. It was nice to feel important for a few moments while it lasted. As you look down, a napkin is neatly folded under your cup. You unfold, finding her handwriting.

"Really enjoyed dancing with you, handsome. Hope to see you again sometime. - Ada"

Ada.

The Lady in Red had a name, and it was Ada. You look around as if Ada will appear magically at your side again, and you will throw yourself into her arms, dumb and in love.

But you had a name. And a note. You place it in your pocket, being careful to not damage it, a secret kept well from the entire world. Only you and Ada knew about this.

You couldn't wait to see Ada again.

-x-

Ada Wong watches from the outside as you sit on your stool, back from the bathroom. She plays with a badge - your badge - in her hands, spinning. She should have left already since she was done with her mission, but something kept her there. Curiosity, maybe?

Ada watches as you unfold her note. Ada didn't know why she even left it there. Ada had been observing you for weeks, waiting for a chance to steal your badge. After tonight, she really didn't need you anymore. But as you turned to leave for the bathroom (after she picked the badge from your pocket) and smiled, she felt strange. Maybe you would follow her outside after she left, worried something happened. So that's why Ada left the note. You open a smile as you finish reading, again, that foolish smile.

A big and genuine smile.

You look toward the glass window, and Ada hides more against the corner, worried you might see her. But you don't, too focused on folding that note back carefully into your pocket.

Ada already observed too much. She leaves with one last good look in your direction, placing your badge into her pocket. Maybe, one day, you two would see each other again. And maybe, just maybe, Ada Wong would give you another dance.

#ada wong x reader #ada wong #ada wong x you #ada wong fanfic #ada wong fanfics

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