#politics are also kinda involved and that bums me out | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

toxicfucksaround · 1 year

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I posted 4,084 times in 2022

That's 1,802 more posts than 2021!

22 posts created (1%)

4,062 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@kengi-bengi-alt

@lesbiacebian

@fullmoonfireball

@borkthemork

@renthony

I tagged 854 of my posts in 2022

#digital art - 103 posts

#artists on tumblr - 96 posts

#nonbinary artist - 95 posts

#digital artist - 93 posts

#art - 81 posts

#nonbinary - 79 posts

#oc artist - 60 posts

#oc art - 57 posts

#procreate - 48 posts

#fanart - 45 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#take it back take it back take it back take it back take it back take it back take it back take it back take it back take it back take it ba

My Top Posts in 2022:

I swear to god if Twitter users come to me and yell at me for stupid shit

I will virtually pepper spray you

That’s right

I’ll block you!

With no warning!

Back off, twitter users!

14 notes - Posted October 27, 2022

Welcome to my blog!

My name is Max, I’m an oc artist who occasionally dabbles in fanart, oc x canon, and self ship shenanigans. If you don’t like that, that’s fine, just follow someone else instead.

Some general rules, bigotry of any kind will get you banned. Be kind and respectful. If I ever say something offensive please correct me, I’m doing my best but everyone makes mistakes, and I’d like to learn and grow from them. Just please be polite, thank you.

Blog Links

My main blog, you’re here!

My art blog, here

My mature art blog, No Minors, here

And my sims blog, here.

And the official blog for a story im working on called Tails of the Wicked.

Socials

My commissions are here!

Here’s my TikTok.

My YouTube channel.

My DeviantArt.

My Ko-Fi, if you’re able to donate or want a commission, let me know!

Some blog rules/things to keep in mind.

Harassment of any kind is not okay. If I do something wrong, correct me kindly, because I’m an idiot and probably don’t know what I did.

Bigotry of any kind is NOT allowed. I will block you. Any racism, lgbtphobia, all of it is not allowed. YOU ARE NOT WELCOME HERE.

I do not give a fuck about pro shipping/anti pro shipping nonsense. Like I don’t care, as long as it’s properly tagged, and no real people are harmed, leave me alone. Don’t send me asks about it, I don’t care.

I am a strong believer that as long as something is properly tagged and out of reach of children, they’re free to do whatever they want with fiction. As long as no real people are harmed, that is. That includes writing fan fiction about real people, it’s gross, don’t do that.

But like, zadr? Don’t care, like. Fuck off. Are people shipping the undertale bros again? I don’t like it but also I can just, ignore it, and mind my own business. Dead dove don’t eat.

Idk I just feel like, tumblr gives us a good system to block tags, use it.

But yeah no DNI list because I just like, don’t care. If you bug me or upset me I’ll block but like

Anyone can come enjoy my shit, I need all the likes and reblogs I can get anyways lmaoo.

15 notes - Posted January 22, 2022

So, this is something I meant to share my opinion on for awhile, but I was nervous to bring negative attention to myself.

This is in regards to the Your Boyfriend fandom, more specifically, the official game and creator.

Tw now for brief mentions of sexual assault and abuse.

Now, I’m not gonna sit here and complain about how the game ruined the personality I came to Peter for or anything, because frankly, I like yanderes, I don’t really care. Am I kinda bummed he’s not as unique and interesting as before, yeah, but I don’t care about that.

What I do care about, is that Fuboo, the creator of Your Boyfriend, marketed Your Boyfriend Peter as a character that is friendly to survivors of sa and abuse, and to aromantic and asexual people through the blog (which is going to be deleted soon from what I heard). She got everyone attached to his interesting take on yanderes, only to turn around and pull day three on us.

For those unaware, day three of the game involves Peter admitting to sexually assaulting you in your sleep, and then using pointless violence on you in every route.

That on its own is fine, classic yandere stuff. The problem is, that again, Peter was marketed as survivor and Aro and Ace friendly. Specifically exposing survivors of abuse and sa to something that could trigger their trauma.

Yes there’s warnings in the game that it’s not for certain audiences, that warns of certain content, however, there is no warning on the site about sexual assault. None.

Technically sa and abuse survivors fall under the triggered category, however, I believe it’s irresponsible to not advertise that there’s mentions of sa in the game.

I understand that this is just the warnings for day 1, however, you should have the warning before any of these survivors get this game, in my opinion.

That and, well, it’s entirely unfriendly to aro and ace people now. I doubt any ace or aro people wanna see this freak go against their lack of love or sexual arousal like this. The blog specifically stated that he would just want to be your closest and only friend if you were aro or ace, so to see this is upsetting. I’m not aro or ace, but I did feel it was important to mention.

All of this is just to say, I am no longer supporting any of the canon or official YB content. I will stick by certain fan creators, but not Fuboo.

I will still probably make fan content myself in regards of loving my OC Mc too much to give them up but, that being said I’m probably gonna redesign my version of Peter to make him stand out from the original game version more.

If you’ve read this far, thank you, please try to keep things civil in the notes. I’m not looking to argue, or persuade others, just stating my opinion and stance on canon.

I have nothing against those who continue to support canon, I just cannot do it myself.

Thank you, I hope you all have a nice day.

25 notes - Posted April 4, 2022

Shout out to all the demiromantic people out there who never crushed on a celebrity but felt left out so they faked a crush to fit in.

Or to the demiros who always felt weirded out by the thirst of fans for celebrities.

To the demiros who think all these real people x fans fanfics are weird or uncomfy

The demiros who may have not experienced love

To the demiros who experienced love once years ago

The demiros who just experienced love for the first time

To the demiros in love with a best friend

The demiros in queer platonic relationships

To the demiros who only experience attraction to fictional characters

The demiros who don’t know what labels they are yet.

To all the Demiromantic people I have yet to mention

I rarely see anyone talk about being demiromantic

So to those who feel left out, here’s a post for you

I see you, I feel your experiences

You’re valid, you’re welcome in this community

You’re experiences are real, your label is real

You may not experience love the same way, but that’s okay

You’re okay.

Don’t let people tell you you’re too picky, or weird, or anything else people like to say.

In a world filled with an emphasis on romance, know you’re okay with, or without it.

Sometimes the best love, is self love, or platonic love.

Sincerely,

A fellow Demiromantic

46 notes - Posted May 16, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

LMAO LOOK WHAT ME AND MY BRO GOT IN OUR DHMIS HUNGER GAMES

115 notes - Posted October 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #Damn you tumblr #my blog is so saddd

0 notes

teatalkstea · 2 years

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June 7th

I need to stop saying “I didn’t really do much” because that is not true. I woke up around either 9 or 10 I don’t remember, either way very early for me. I stayed in bed piddling about on my phone until about 11ish. I decided on my journey to not talking to my ex (ugh we’ll get into that) and bettering myself I am going to read a political article or a political podcast. I also did a full skin care routine! I made myself some tea with my full moon water and just listened to a podcast about the riot on the capital/another about gun control. Although I felt like a big girl for having tea and reading the news. It all kind of bummed me out. My current partner and bestie-crush are both trans and I constantly feel so helpless. I just read and read about how trans people are being attacked in America (I’m working on widening to world news give me a few months) and I don’t know how to help them. I want to make them feel safe and loved.

Even though my partner will never (hopefully) read these I feel like I should write a little about them. I don’t really write about them because they don’t cause me great feelings of distress/anxiety. I write about the people I write about because I need an outlet other than sh. However, they don’t really get that. They see it as me not loving them enough to right about them. They don’t draw me? Why am I expected to write about them. Ugh that’s another thing. But we went out today and I couldn’t help but feel like a burden. That’s how I feel a lot of the time because they pay for a lot of things involving me. So idk I just feel like a burden. But also my car is kinda broken and I live somewhere super hot and my partner is sensitive to heat so going out causes both of us stress. I need to get better and showing them love and attention. Right now I think we are both in a lazy/stuck stage in our relationship.

Anyway time to talk about my ex and then my bestie who is also my crush aka bestie/crush. Okay so I tried to be good and not talk to my ex that much today because they cause me so much pain and blah blah blah. I do think I broke our streak today which is painful for me because I love streaks. Anyway. They told me that they were jealous when bestie-crush admitted they had sexual feelings about me. I asked my ex SO many times how they felt and if it would be okay for me to purse this new person. They said yes every time. My ex and I have a very (to a fault sometimes) open dialogue. I had no reason to believe that this made them upset. However, they did say some out of pocket things that did make me think they were jealous of bestie-crush. So very close to 1am they were like can I confess something? And I obviously said yes because I’m nosy and I’m not completely ready to sever our bond. They sent a very long message about how bestie-crush admitting they had “feelings” (for lack of a better word) for me and me continuing to talk to bestie-crush sent them into a spiral. Now perhaps you could say “well why did you still talk to bestie-crush if you knew it made your partner uncomfortable?” Well because hypothetical reader, they did not communicate any of this to me. My ex didn’t want to come of as possessive or jealous of my friend so they decided to break up with me (and for other reasons) instead of telling me they were afraid I would leave them. Now months later all I can do is laugh. I constantly tried to make my ex comfortable and happy because I was so afraid of them leaving. They didn’t really show any sort of care about my needs, but as soon as someone else expresses an attraction to me, suddenly it’s just because I’m easy and they just want to use my body. I’m so tired this is not explained well at all.

Anyway bestie-crush. Okay so a yearish ago we friendship broke up because we were both becoming toxic and not very good for each other. They were my best friend. I was heartbroken. I did not think I could recover from the person who I loved so much and new me better than anyone starting to hate me. It broke me that someone who knew me so well could still want to leave me. Like. Even writing this I want to cry. I just felt so empty and lost. But we came back together! We had a conversation a few days ago when I was in my hometown about a lot of thing. One of those things being our individual perspectives on how things went down. They listened to me and reassured me about things. Him actually reassuring me and telling me that he didn’t see themselves leaving me again. Again thinking about it I could cry. They are so wonderful. Omg he is so cute! The issue here is the issue I arrive at with most men, I think they only like me for my sexual aspects. Which is definitely not true because they haven’t spoken to me sexually in awhile…BUT I am still so worried. But also I know they are nice to me because they’re my friend and not just my lover. Omg one time he called themselves my lover and I could just melt. I forgot where I was going. But they are in the grand scheme still one of my closest friends. I want to talk to them all the time, but I’m scared they’re going to think it is because of the mental illness/anxious attachment style rather than the fact that they are still my friend and I am just annoying as fuck. Anyway I don’t know what to do with someone who knows me this well. I planned a “date” I would call it a date with bestie-crush I’m gonna call it a “hang out” with them at a cute garden fish place. I’m so excited to see them again. I just miss having a friend. I hope we can have our first kiss at a cool garden area. That would be so romantic.

In the meantime to fill the void I’m going to read a bunch of romance novels that have trans men as the main characters. I’ll say I’m doing to for pride (and kinda bored of reading smut) but really I just want to feel a tingle of romance. Also I know I have a partner, but we are so deep into our relationship where we both just stress about money not really about romance. We are both working through a lot of stress so romancing me isn’t really on my partner’s mind.

#teatalkstea

0 notes

hetalia-has-a-secretary · 3 years

Note

Axis and Allies when they run in to their s/o who just dipped out one day 7 years ago with no warning or explanation, except she’s a mom now! And hey that kid looks... uh... kinda familiar... and they’re how old now?

(Basically Axis and Allies find their ex and meet their child who is a dead ringer for their country parent)

Mmmm angst *slurps the spilled angst off the floor*

Ffff- I need to come up with reasons as to why their S/O do this~ (• J •;)

Oh and C/N means Child's Name.

Allies and Axis see their S/O with their kid of 7 years.

Allies:

America:

His S/O ran into him on their way home, and the store they were in had something extremely specific they couldn't find anywhere.

So they took their chances, not really expecting to see America again.

But they did, and it was a long pause in silence.

S/O could physically how hurt he was, but the sight of a child, even if it was obviously his, made him turn around to walk off.

His S/O didn't know what to expect, but him walking away was not one of them. They picked their kid up and went after him.

"Alfie- He's yours..."

He stopped in his tracks, eyes already red, but scrunched in confused anger.

"Why didn't you tell me? After all this time... Why?"

His S/O walked closer to him, not wanting to stir up unwanted attention.

They explained that they were scared their lives wouldn't work out. They were worried he'd be so busy traveling and enjoying life, a new family would weigh him down.

Giving another hard swallow he went to walk away, only for the kid to be eyeing him from his S/O's shoulder.

Neither of them meant to act like this in front of the kid, but none the less America found a way to console them, promising to do what it takes to show how much he cared. About both them, and their child.

Even if it took a few akward phone calls.

England:

His heart shattered. Standing right across the road was his S/O.

And in a spur of the moment he ran across beeping traffic, and stopped barely 10 steps away as he notices the kid.

Part of him hated the fact they ran off, and was happy they crossed paths again. The other part of him wondered if running across a busy road was worth it.

He looked at his S/O, then at the kid, silently asking if it was really his.

A quick nod from his S/O and he immediately knelt down to talk to the kid, making his S/O tear up.

"Hey kiddo. I'm... You must be S/O kid right? I'm an old friend of theirs... My name's Arthur..."

The kid looked up at S/O for approval to interact with this 'stranger', to which they agreed.

"Hi... I'm C/N... How are you?"

England had to fight back tears at this point.

"I'm doing good... Very good. It seems S/I taught you well, you're very polite..."

The kid nodded, saying thank you.

Only later did he find out that his S/O left, thinking he wouldn't want a kid, and it was going to ruin the relationship.

From them on he did everything he could to make up all the lost time, silently worrying over why they'd think he'd wouldn't want a family with them.

France:

He was brutality heartbroken the day they left. Like, this is a HUGE no, no to do to him.

At first he thought they were missing, but when it finally became clear they just left him, he got really cold.

Right up to the point of seeing them in public, on the streets.

Eyes locked, and his S/O expected him to be romantic about, fully preparing to reconnect.

Not what happened. He walked up to them, a crunched up face, obviously smitten with them.

"Why are you showing your face around my home?"

Pain on both sides of the party. His S/I wouldn't be able to get a word in as he assaulted them with questions and accusations as to if they even loved him.

Only when the sound of a small kid calling out for S/O did France freeze.

He was shocked, and looked at his S/O wise eyed.

His S/O gave a vague explanation.

"I'm sorry... But I wanted to raise them outside of a busy city. I told you were I was going to be, didn't you get my letter?"

He shook his head no. Watching his S/O silently cry in front of them.

And in one forgiving swoop he held them close, tears falling from his own eyes as he gave apologies.

After he was done with his S/O, his child was next, he spun them around, immediately repeating the fact he was their father, making the child giggle as well.

China:

Even though he felt close to his S/O he got over it quickly, also being use to people leaving him for whatever reason.

He never expects relationships to last.

But seeing a familiar face, I should say familiar faces, standing at his door made his heart pond, and ache all at once.

He wanted so badly to hold them, but he needed answers.

S/O ride broke down near by, and they needed a place to stay. This was the only place they could think of.

Once the kid was put to sleep, both adults doing an amazing job of keeping their cool, things started to unravel.

He asked about the kid, and why they left. Being told his S/O was simply a bit overwhelmed finding out they were pregnant, so they decided to leave made him almost laugh.

To him it was a ridiculous reason to leave, so he was the one to ask them to stay.

Russia:

He did not do well when he realized his S/O wasn't coming back anytime soon.

He felt their relationship was at its peak, only for them to disappear? Yeah, not going to happen.

His S/O might think they were better off but Ivan, had other plans. He wanted to know why. Was there someone else involved, more specifically.

He hired people to watch them, and when he learned there was a kid involved it angered him. He had to fight every nerve to not go find his S/O himself.

Only when he saw the kids eyes, a brilliant purple, did it click for him.

The reason why they left didn't matter, and he gave them time to change there mind.

When those 7 years past (if even) he went straight to where they were, demanding answers.

His S/O had to explain they were scared having a child around could complicate things. Especially when Ivan himself was trying to change as a person.

That news turned his anger into hurt. He wanted nothing more than to be family with his S/O, and having a kid as well? He already made vows to change, so he became a little more self aware after this event.

He went great lengths to learn about parenting, to the amusement of his S/O.

Though he won't admit it, he is kind of bummed out over the fact he was never able to hold his own kid as a baby.

Axis:

Germany:

Heartbroken wasn't the word to use.

He got a bit more, pig headed for a month or so, but got over it. Assuming it just wasn't meant to be.

However, after seeing a child that looked like a splitting image of him hanging on his S/O's hips said it all.

He literally walked up and straight up asked if the pregnancy was the reason they left.

His S/O sheepishly agreeing.

He gave a sigh, asking them if they'd still be interested in being together.

From there the next few months were spent patching up their relationship.

Japan:

He had to be convinced several times, to leave his room.

Eventually he moved on, but still missed them

So the look on his face when he finds them at an old restaurant they use to meet at, was quite the look.

He cursed himself for the sensation of meeting for the first time.

It was like his body moved on it's own. Up until he spots the kid. Then he tried to backpedal.

Not Because he wasn't happy about being a father (possibly), but he wasn't ready for the news.

He only got so far before his S/O called out his human name. To which he froze and turned around with a bright red face. Obviously understanding the situation.

Surprisingly enough the three of them seemed to connect and get along like it wasn't a super akward moment.

He almost all forgot to ask about why, but saved that question when C/N wasn't around.

He was glad to hear it was just because they were scared. Now he's more than happy to try again, and actually kind of excited to teach this small being about anime... And life things but mostly anime.

Italy:

He's the kind of guy to never get over it.

Even though he's fine on the outside, literally everything I'm his home reminded him of S/O

The amount of whiplash he experienced when finding them in his home town made his skin crawl

To him, it was like seeing a ghost, and it was honestly a bit much. Especially with the tiny clone of him.

Naturally he fainted on the spot.

Later on, in the hands of a medical staff, he and his S/O had a long conversation about the why's, and how's.

His heart still sunk hearing the reason they ran away, was because they didn't want to take away his freedom.

Thing is, his S/O was his freedom. So he listed all the reasons why. Freedom to be him, freedom to admit his fears when others would laugh at him.

They were his source of strength, and safety net. So yeah, he wanted them back. Kid was an added bonus.

#hetalia american #hetalia england #hetalia france #hetalia china #hetalia russia #hetalia germany #hetalia italy #hetalia japan #hetalia world stars #hetalia #hws #aph

54 notes · View notes

theyarebothgunshot · 3 years

Note

ROSE I AM FREAKING OUT HAVE YOU SEEN THE PREQUEL STUFF???? WHAT IS GOING ON, my god... I was literally about to go to sleep, decided to check Tumblr one last time and see this.... what WHAT!! WHATTTT!!!!!! I don't even know if this is good bad or what but just JENSEN IS PRODUCING A SUPERNATURAL PREQUEL AND DEAN'S GONNA BE THE NARRATOR OR Sth LIKE???? -🐸

YEAH i am normal about this <3 (jk i am also freaking out) welcome to: people screaming to me in my inbox about prequelgate ft. j/2 fallout theory. let's goooo!

Another copypasta and suddenly chaos machine is full on gay I love this prophecy

you know whats funny i just checked the j/2 tag and i feel like for the first time in a long time they are starting to realise that maybe THEY should be the ones who are "gutted" *sips tea*

ROSE HOLY SHIT ROOOOOOOOSE ITS HAPPENING HOLY SHIIIIIT

YEAH

Nevermind just read prequel and well good luck I guess but just you know kind of bleh who wants to watch John Winchester well let’s have hope anyways

i know a lot of people are bummed out but i am kind of very excited actually?? i trust robbie and even though yeah j*hn winchester turned into a nasty abusive bastard, it can be interesting to explore how it all started (imo). it's just the first of many stories they can tell.

I can only accept this circus if it’s Dean telling the stories to his and Cas’ kids and then we have a revival to show that the whole finale was in fact the end Chuck wanted there Jensen I fixed it

i would not say no to this

heyloo bee anon here

um- wtf is happening?

jackles prequel series?? why? i want to be excited about this but sheesh im scared

because supernatural is never dead <3

okay, but, jensen... john winchester ≠ jdm, you don’t have to go /that/ hard for him 🙃

true true... though i am waiting for jdm to comment on this, please i need it

WAIT A SECOND J2 FALLOUT THEORY TRUE??

LMAO HELL YEAH BESTIE

Rose you really picked the worst time to sleep for real

bestie it was literally 4 in the morning, what do you expect from me sdfjsfhsf

I can’t literally can’t we were all right LMAO j2 fallout theory is real and cockles (Misha supporting Jensen) is [gunshots] I’m just laughing cause what the hell is this timeline we’re living LMAOOOOOOOOOO

we would always end up here <3

Do we have the copypaste anons to thank for JP basically confirming the J2 fallout? lol 🦚

yes, everybody say 'thanks annoying idiots!'

ROSE, WAKE UP, COME HERE,

THERE'S A LOT GOING ON FFS

YEAH I KNOW BUT I NEEDED SLEEP

Anticipating that there's going to be a lot of yelling about the prequel on here: I am cackling, but also, I mean, the first time Dean got a look into his parent's past, Cas was the catalyst: literally entered Dean's mind and catapulted him to the 70s. So idk, it's not completely unreasonable to expect some Cas cameos, maybe setting up a parallel timeline since Dean is narrating. What I'm saying is, this is Jackles, he's getting JDM and Misha in on this lmao -Honeymoon Anon

you were right lmfaooo also i fully agree. misha's tweet further cemented that thought for me. he knew about this prequel and i dont think he is cas-baiting us, i think he'll be involved. i'd also be obsessed to see jensen and jdm act together again (though idk who jdm could play seeing as it's a prequel and he is way too old to play young j*hn)

longlivethetribbles heeft gevraagd:

Heyyyyyy bestie, are you SEEING the absolute madness going on right now holy shit

well a little late but I SURE AM BESTIE

bestie wake up pls s16 finale just dropped.

- 🍯

and WHAT a great one it was

I love coming home from work to see all of the chaos unfolding on Tumblr and Twitter. I'm absolutely buzzing right now. I'll probably still be here by the time you wake up and check tumblr 😂 - 🐢

lmaooo and were you still awake?? did you see my freak out??

Oooh bestie wake the fuck up, I know you’re gonna be excited for this one jsnsjsj

god i had SUCH a morning like. it's 12:00 now and all i did since i woke up is check tumblr rip

short summary: jen and dee gain the rights, they post on ig/twitter about a prequel ft john and mary that no one asked for, the fandom loses its everloving shit as usual, they trend on twitter thanks to the beloved twt intern who missed us, misha qt’s jen about cas possibly benefiting from being in the prequel, then j*red qt’s jensen abt how his feelings got hurt by him not being told about a prequel his character as no involvement in & he initially throws a tantrum, and the rest is history - 🦋 anon (ps: i hope this helps a little, i’ve been scattered brained trying to keep up with it all night lmao so pls let me know if i missed anything, bug crew !!)

thank you so much darling i figured it out eventually but this is a helpful summary!!!

I hope you enjoyed waking up to all of this XD -🐢

i sure did!!! also that answers my question about you being awake lmao

I WILL NEVER EVER EVER FORGIVE MYSELF FOR SLEEPING THROUGH ALL OF THIS DRAMA AND NOT EXPERIENCING IT IN PERSON I DIDN'T NEED THIS SLEEP - tea anon

well the party was still going strong this morning so im not TOO "gutted" see what i did there lmaooo

Now that you are caught up with the news... So idk if you remember this but...didn't jarpad tell jackles he was up for a reboot in an online panel? And jackles answered that this was news to him??

-🍯

yeah i think you are right but he was clearly joking and didnt expect jackles to actually be working on something already

J2 anon spare more of those anons let's finish this - tea anon

please, we're having a ball in this bitch

I saw a post on tumblr where someone said now that Kripke gave J&D the rights, maybe they’re starting with a prequel just to end on a reboot in years time and honestly ? I wanna believe that so badly. This is tinhatty but what if this is all calculated in a way that makes it so that Jensen is slowly starting to fix everything that was wrong with spn - now that he has the rights and he’s slowly making spn his own story ?! I mean he did say in his ig post he wants to ‘fill in the rest’ - and maybe Mary and John’s story is only the beginning of spn related content from J&D to come ??? Maybe he wants to give spn the justice it deserves ?? Thoughts ??

i dont think this is tinhatty at all i think this is very possible and not that much of a reach. i could see this happening yeah for sure

want to hear something funny. I found out I had a ruptured blood vessel in my eye because I was sending my friend a video freaking out when the prequel news dropped and I noticed the corner of my eye was red af. and when I got back online jared had tweeted.

DJFHSJD ANON THE CHAOS OF IT ALL, HELP, are you okay? <3

rose.. bestie... how are you feeling about The News? nsfshsf being european is a curse </3 🐞

i feel GREAT im living for it i feel on top of the world tbh (and yeah it really is dsjfhs)

What am I waking up to I can't WHAT I rested my eyes for like 5 minutes help *hits reblog button* - anon anon

yep yep essentially djfhs

“Jensen and Misha are Co workers who barley talk”

I can’t be sure of course but I’m fairly certain that this is the copypasta that brought the j/2 fallout theory back to life. Who’s apparently ‘barely talking’ now? skansjsjsj. It’s almost prophetic, these j/2 anons have superpowers I’m telling ya.

-poker face anon

next time we get one of them we should be thanking them lmaooo

ok, but are we gonna talk about the "When Daneel and I formed Chaos Machine Productions, we knew that the first story we wanted to tell was the story of John and Mary Winchester [...]"-quote because the way this is phrased implies they formed CHAOS MACHINE Productions with the intent of telling this story (first), i haven't been in this dumpster long enough but the name just tickles me in that Misha way, isn't it so sus??? am i missing something???? i mean with this announcement they SURE lived up to that name... 🧩-anon

you are absolutely right, chaos machine SCREAMS misha and we are all here for it!!

hey hey hey. joining the clownverse, there's no way THEE cas girl danneel doesn't know just how much the fandom loves misha and cas. so 2 + 2 = misha in the spn prequel!

AGREED

So I think I finally managed to catch up on wtf happened while I was asleep and my brain melted. What a shit show to wake up to.

Anyway thoughts.

I don't hate the idea of a Mary&John sequel. I think it has the potential to be good (It has the potential to be really bad too, so I'm kind scared).

🕯️🕯️🕯️ manifesting Mary being badass and John being kinda useless🕯️🕯️🕯️

As for the Jensen and J*red thing.

I can see Jensen not telling J*red even if they are still friends, because J*red is kinda good at accidentally telling Secrets. He could have told him right before he announced it so, so that J*red didn't have to find out from twitter. He was on the show for 15 years, he is bound to get asked about it. The public twitter meltdown was really unprofessional so. Like you have Jensen's number J*red. You could have sorted that out in private like a normal person, but instead you choose to act like a toddler throwing a tantrum.

Is it weird that I'm actually going to be kinda that for them if the actually had a falling out, even tho I don't like J*red all that much. They seemed to be really important to each other and while I thought before that the might have triefted apart a bit, I didn't think that the where actively fighting.

- 🐌 anon

the thing is, the polite/normal thing for jensen to do was text him before announcing it on twitter. it's weird he didn't, and that makes me believe that maybe yeah they did have a falling out. especially with the way j*red responded to it on twitter. if he had no other reason to be this upset (no prior beef or falling out) you'd think that he wouldn't be responding like this. on the other hand, the man is a mysterie to me so who the hell knows. i'm not gonna mourn about it if they did/do grow apart because j*red is just.... awful imo.

#frog anon #bee anon #peacock anon #subtlerainy #honeymoon anon #bestie mutual #honeypot anon #turtle anon #butterfly anon #tea anon #ladybug anon #anon anon #poker face anon #puzzle pieces anon #snail anon #good lord i think i got more anons about this than about anything else before lmao #good luck to anybody who actually reads this <3

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popatochisssp · 3 years

Note

I need memes for the new boys. Meme me, Poppy. Meme me.

As always, I am ashamed at how well-equipped I am to answer this question...

Meme Fluent: Ash (Undergloom Sans), Ell (Horrorswap Papyrus), Sunny (Gastertale Sans)

Can At Least Ask Where The Bathroom Is In Meme: Brick (Horrorfell Sans), Nemo (Horrorswapfell Papyrus), Aster (Gastertale Papyrus)

Meme-blivious: Yrus (Undergloom Papyrus), King (Horrorfell Papyrus), Merc (Horrorswap Sans), Pitch (Horrorswapfell Sans)

Ash (Undergloom Sans): Very savvy and up on all the most popular memes, scrolling through memes is an activity very low on the ‘activity’ part and great for when he’s feeling a little too tired to do anything else. He’s very into tiktoks, which help him keep up to date on the latest meme songs-- some of which he might try to learn to play on his own. In general, he’s also into memes with funny or weird-looking animals (frogs, possums, axolotls, etc), no specific kind of meme, the presence of a goofy-looking creature in it is usually good enough to get a smile or a chuckle out of him.

Yrus (Undergloom Papyrus): Not all that up to date on the meme scene, he’s usually busy with other things... but! He really loves relatable memes, especially ones about procrastination or not being able to focus on work or having to do chores, everyday mundane irritations that everybody can relate to! He also thinks reading comprehension errors are great harmless fun (i.e., “my bad i thought u said moths”), just silly misunderstandings that make for confusing interactions until someone realizes.

Brick (Horrorfell Sans): Doesn’t always remember every meme, but he gets the gist of most of them. His favorites are the MS Paint memes, usually the more poorly drawn, the better (but a fan of pretty much every catcrumb image he sees, those chaotic little cats are great). He can also be caught laughing himself to wheezing and banging on the table over completely bizarre and out of context interactions--for some reason, they just hit right on the funny bone and he has no defense against them. (The ‘Nyquil Detroit Become Liquid’ post nearly killed him, but he would’ve thanked it.)

King (Horrorfell Papyrus): Not too interested in memes. He’s peripherally aware of them but rarely knows the latest trends or cares to know them. He does have a slight fondness for evil memes--ones about being evil or having an evil lair or just have the word ‘evil’ as an adjective in front of something else seemingly incongruous--he finds them silly and they can usually win at least a smirk out of him when he happens to come across one. If you want a laugh, though, find him some of those screenshots of old newspapers from the 30s-50s, formally written humor that still holds up even now (like The Windsor Star, Ontario, November 1, 1958, The Cincinnati Enquirer, Ohio, February 21, 1947, or Barnard Bulletin, New York, December 20, 1935). Sensible chuckles abound from those!

Merc (Horrorswap Sans): Not too into memery, he’s definitely got a lot of other things going on and isn’t always online. Still, he is a fan of stuff like one-time-i-dreamt and other accounts of peoples’ dreams or thought processes. He thinks it’s interesting, the little peek into the wandering, strange, and sometimes funny subconscious, or how people think about love and tenderness and nostalgia and remind others to appreciate those things, too. It’s a very niche, wholesome sort of enjoyment for sure... but not to worry! If you’re looking for something more mainstream and ‘haha funny,’ he also got very into the whole ‘Surprise! It’s cake!’ meme trend that was going on for awhile and is still delighted to find a video where a realistic object is cut into and turns out to be cake. He’s definitely going to make one himself, maybe as a social media marketing thing for his home business...

Ell (Horrorswap Papyrus): Very meme savvy and tends toward some of the maybe darker types of humor--stress and anxiety memes, introvert memes, et cetera. Animated text is a big one he likes, with enough of a mix of pessimist and optimist memes that he doesn’t come away from checking it actually bummed out or feeling bad, a fine line to walk to be sure. He also likes coding and programming humor! He’s still kinda teaching himself, so he definitely doesn’t get them all, but it gives him a little sense of accomplishment and community when he does, which he really likes.

Pitch (Horrorswapfell Sans): Not interested in memes, and a lot of them are heavily based on visuals which, unfortunately, he’s going to miss the context. Still, he does get a hell of a kick out of brazen and blatant misinformation--the smooth sharks post, facts-i-just-made-up, and the like--and finds it hilarious when someone insists something that is obviously untrue, especially if a lot of people aren’t getting the joke and are trying fervently to convince them of their wrongness. He’s also a little bit evil, so whenever he learns a new piece of whatever slang is popular and in at the moment, he’s going to use it incorrectly, or use outdated slang to induce cringe in those around him. ‘Totes yeet yo’? Yes. ‘That is so pog, as the kids say’? Of course. ‘It’s lit, fam’? Definitely, who do you take him for? The cringier, the better, he revels in the discomfort of others when he throws one of those babies out.

Nemo (Horrorswapfell Papyrus): Definitely knows a little bit about memes, not always the latest trends but his base knowledge is pretty good, and of course has his favorites. He loves John Mulaney references and reaction images, they just Speak to him, y’know? Outside of that, he’s very fond of day-of-the-week memes, Tuesday Again?, Out of Touch Thursday, Fat Fuck Friday and so on. Aside from being a useful reminder of what the hell day of the week it is, he likes the consistency and recurrence of it, just a silly little moment to look forward to at some point like, “oh yeah, it’s el muchacho monday, nice!”

Sunny (Gastertale Sans): Pretty wise to the meme scene overall, loves the fun and creativity of it all. If you want him to absolutely lose his shit, though, show him a terrible picture of an animal--by which I mean, poorly photoshopped, blurred, in mid-panoramic, as long as the end result is an absurd or very screwed up image. Why are things like ‘buff half cat’ and ‘dog but very, very long’ his sense of humor? He has no idea, but the worse it looks, the harder he laughs. He has a bit of a fondness for ‘gotcha’s too, like a Rickroll but really anything where you go into it expecting one thing, and get trolled by receiving something else. (If Megalovania memes were a thing in his universe, he would be all over them, if that gives you an idea of the kind of gag he thinks is funny!)

Aster (Gastertale Papyrus): Aware of memes, but not all that invested in them. He likes corporate and office/business memes a lot-- the kind that roast bosses and unnecessary meetings, translate ‘polite’ corporate phrases, anything to do with emails--because they can be very relatable. He also likes seeing screencaps of people on Facebook or Twitter getting dragged for misinformation, or trying to act like a pompous jerk and getting shredded (for legitimate reasons of course, not just random unprovoked cyberbullying). He...may be involved in a bit of that sometimes himself: he may not be working in a scientific field, but he is half of a scientist, and just petty enough to spend a few hours of his free time looking up and reading through a few credible sources to cite in a strong and well-crafted rebuttal argument if someone is being especially, dangerously wrong about something. Not everyone has the time and resources to do it, so why shouldn’t he? 😇

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rorysfm · 4 years

Text

hllo demons n nerds ! i’m sage, coming 2 u live frm the est gutters! i am... v excited to be here but i am literally the worst at intros so i’m jus gonna diiiiive right into rory below !

(ISABELLA JONES, CISFEMALE) - Have you seen AURORA LEBLANC? RORY is in HER SOPHOMORE year. The DANCE AND SOCIOLOGY MAJOR is 19 years old & is a LIBRA. People say SHE is LIVELY, MAGNETIC, IMPULSIVE and UNRELIABLE. Rumors say they’re a member of CALLOWAY. I heard from the gossip blog that HER PARENTS ARE COVERING UP THAT SHE WAS KICKED OUT OF YALE FOR PLAGIARISM AND NO OTHER IVY WOULD ACCEPT HER, SO THEY BOUGHT HER WAY INTO YATES

ok, so.. rory is a brand new muse of mine so.. pls bare w me while i sort her out. if u want to skip the mess below & just vibe check her.. here’s her pinterest!

BACKGROUND

born and raised in greenwood, south carolina to oliver and lauren leblanc. her parents were high school sweethearts who were voted most likely to get married and have a dozen kids running around

they stopped at 2 because they jus... their kids were a handful but rory will tell you they stopped after her bc they hit perfection :~)

her mom’s family teetered between lower-middle class, her mom entering a bunch of pageants to bring in some extra cash for them.

her dad’s side on the other hand, is where all the connections are baby!!

the leblancs come from a long long line of being wrapped up in the political world. governors, members of the state senate, mayors, advisers... you name it - a leblanc has had that position.

her dad’s goals were no different than the rest of his family’s ... some would say even bigger bc he wants to do what no other leblanc was able to do, which is... run for president. (yes hello.. rory as the future first daughter?)

growing up her parents were honestly... not the best. like above all else they put oliver’s career above their kids and it wasn’t not being there for an important recital, or a parent-teacher night; it was being there for all the wrong reasons.

every little thing they did was calculating to make the leblancs look like the perfect family. hugs and words of encouragement loud enough to filter through the room aimed at their darling children only for them to turn cold and criticise every single thing they did wrong as soon as they got into the car. it was pretty clear that oliver and lauren were a team, and their kids were just props.

when rory was 12, lauren started making monthly appointments at the hair salon to dye rory’s hair blonde... she had a standing appointment every tenth of the month to have her roots touched up

rory’s mom jus rly... pushed rory on her looks and enrolled her in pageants, debutante balls, anything that showed off rory’s looks... lauren pushed her towards it.

rory and her brother declan stayed in their hometown for school until college bc their parents thought it made them look like more of wholesome family so instead of sending them off to boarding schools in london or new york, they opted for private schools in south carolina

both of them were of course pushed into going to well renowned schools, their grandfather had pushed them into going to yates since he, himself had been part of calloway and they were practically legacies and while declan followed thru with it... rory watched the cinderella story one too many times and like hilary duff..... sis went to princeton for political science!!!

only it ended up in flames bc tbh she was like a bull in a china shop, the freedom of not having her parents around to judge every single thing she did? or pushing her into doing things she hated? she od’d on FREEDOM. rory rly just did her own thing, kinda spiralled out of control.. never hard drugs but lots of drinking and partying.

she ended up getting put on probation and was flunking nearly every course. the pressure really got to her (like she knew her parents would get involved if you got kicked out or if she failed all her courses) so she ended up plagiarising an essay ... but gueSS what!! she was caught and her parents got involved anyways.

her parents ended up being able to keep things ... quiet by paying off the teacher that had caught her. the dean also agreed to stay mum about it (after accepting a hefty cheque), so nothing ever went of her record, nothing would ever be documented of this mishap.

but... it’s likely people still talk and while rumors can’t be proven, it still stopped rory from getting into yale, harvard and columbia when she tried

finally with her grandfather’s pull and the promise to build yates a new library with the next 5 years... rory was accepted just as declan had graduated.

PRESENT

pulled up to yates in her vintage baby blue mercedes benz convertible from the 60′s

she’s brand new to yates, and switched out of political science.

out of all the activities and hobbies that her parents tried to push her into, dance was the only one she actually enjoyed doing and fell in love with

her parents let her major in it, as long as she did a double major.. so sis took sociology because why not?

spent her summer dancing with the new york ballet company in their production of a midsummer’s night dream.

honestly.. loved it but also was lowkey bummed out she missed out on a proper summer

right before declan had graduated, rory had come up for a campus tour and ended up partying at yates for a weekend

probably got herself into a bit of trouble, and probably made a nice little impression on a few people!

PERSONALITY

honestly.. chaotic good. she’s always been a little more on the wilder side than declan.. a little more carefree and daring and just always needed to be told to behave

in fact has a tattoo that says BEHAVE on her forearm, that she got one night back in princeton.

that said, she’s very good at playing her part in the family

dubbed as the golden girl... bc she is just that kind of girl that has a magnetic pull to her, a smile that could combat the sun and just naturally very charming and genuinely nice?? very good a convincing you without being manipulative about it

does only angel by harry styles play when she walks in the room? possibly.

the kind of girl that you spend weeks thinking about after one (1) conversation

still gets her hair dyed blonde the 10th of every month, bc her mother has convinced her she is just not meant to be a brunette :/

honestly.. she’s insecure abt a lot of things because of her mom :/

has really great posture and etiquette from all those pageant days. also really good at making cranes out of dinner napkins from being bored at functions her parents forced her to go to

would probably throw hands if she caught someone talking badly abt her brother bc she’s protective of him

very much a hopeless romantic, gets heart eyes very easily and likes to chase until it isn’t fun anymore and falls in love with multiple people a day.

tragically likes country music :/

promised her brother she wld.. try to be good and stay out of trouble but i reckon.... she won’t plagiarize an essay ever again but everything else? the partying? fair game.

CONNECTIONS

tbh i will take anything yall will give me... i am @ ur service serving rory on a silver platter to u

i’m also big on chemistry so we can just see where things go as well since rory is new to yates this could be fun!!

a few people she met while she was visiting last year.. someone she clicked with and they stayed in touch, maybe someone she flirted with but doesn’t remember then (even tho she’ll pretend she does!), someone she hooked up with perhaps? someone she spent all night talking to?

a brother’s friend she’s met a couple times?

good influence/bad influence

family friends

family rivals

cousins could be fun

a roommate

a tutor?

tinder matches? hook ups, flirtationship .. anything angsty!!

friends!! pleathe i will take them all.. a girl squad would also be quite fun!

ok.. that’s all tht my lil brain can come up with.. im sorry this is so long and such a mess but hmu if you’d like to plot!!

#yatesintro #omg whew chile.. this got so long #im so sorry #4 this and 4 this mess

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wheatlev · 4 years

Note

📃💕💎 for the hyperfixation asks, and you can choose which to talk about 🥰

gonna make this one abt DotV/Fearless Vampire Killers (the movie not the band that apparently exists???)

what is the plot of your hyperfixation? and is it a movie, game, show, etc?

(cracks knuckles) This applies to the musical and the movie, I am going to make notes where the plot differs significantly, if at all.

So basically DotV is about a bumbling idiot of a professor named Abronsius (from Königsberg, or in the Broadway show, Heidelberg?) and his shy assistant Alfred, on their way to Transsilvania. Abronsius is convinved that vampires are, in fact, real, and wants to show everyone that laughed him off his seat in uni that they were wrong (also he does talk about wanting a nobel prize in the play, so).

They make it to a small inn, the professor half frozen to eath, where everyone is wearing garlic all over while pretending it is definitely not cause of vampires haha youre so silly old man :) The two of them get a room with a bathroom that is, apparently for some reason also shared by the innkeepers daughter who has a serious thing for bathing despite her father trying to tell her to knock it off already. (Notably in the movie the bathroom’S the only garlic free room so I guess...). She of course does NOT listen, and subsequently both meets Alfred, who immediately falls in love with her a la every single movie ever.

The inkeeper, Chagall, is also a serial adulterer, ddespite trying to keep his daughter from the same thing he is subjecting their only maid to, causing his wife to hit Abronsius over the head with a sausage that very night when the Pro is investigating noises he heard on the stairs (which were Chagall, sneaking out to bother the maid).

(In the stage show the vampire count makes his first appearance here, being appropriately mysterious and, I think, telepathically communicating with the daughter, Sarah?)

The next day the inn is visited by a cripple (literally called that). He asks for a bunch of candles, and while they’re being fetched, tells Sarah to follow him later that night. He gets his candles, leaves, Abronsius asks who that was, and why the inkeeper is so scared of the guy. Chagall deflects, and Abronsius waffles on some more.

That evening Alfred tries to take a bath, which Sarah walks in on, he lets her have the bath and then said vampire count comes crashing in through the skylight and bites her for the first time after inviting her to his midnight ball. (The stage play also has him singing a whole song about how he knows she’s grown tired of her life etc). He flees, and Alfred, who spotted him through the keyhole, alerts the inkeeper, the wife, and his prof, and everyone just bum-rushes Sarah. She’s told off VERY sternly by her father.

She leaves the house later that night, finding Alfred pining for her outside. They have a bit of a discussion about whether or not she should run away. (The stage play involves a big dance number here and gives her a bit more of a personality than damsell in distress.) Alfred returns to the inn, alerting the innkeeper that Sarah left, and Chagall runs off to go find her.

The very next morning, he’s brought in, frozen to deathm apparently, and the cause is determined to be wolves. Abronsius knows better, but is not listened to, resulting in Chagall unfreezing later and attacking the maid he apparently still has the hots for. Professor and Alfred return to stake Chagall, find the maid instead, and coax him into leading them to the castle.

There, they meet the count and his (very gay, like for real) son, pretending they are bat researchers and securing a place to stay overnight.

(End first act of the play.)

Once in the castle, Alfred has a buncha nightmares (another hecking GREAT dance number in the play) and wakes up to find the Professor raring to go kill some vampires. They set off, and things go well until the Professor gets held back and Alfred fails to stake the Count and his sons, promptimg him to head back out and leaving the Professor to freeze, again. (In the musical he doesn’t and just leaves with Alfred.)

Chagall and his maid love were trying to sleep in the crypt with the count, get booted out by the hunchback and go to sulk about it, I guess.

Alfred goes to look for Sarah, findign the Profesor distracted with the library, finds her, fails to convince her to be saved, and ultimately leaves. Prof is still busy, but suggests a book to help Alfred with his problems, so he picks up a book of poems.

He runs into the son of the count, who thinks Alfred is in love with HIM, not Sarah, there is a scene that is either funny as hell or super uncomfortable depending on how you feel about using gay peopel for comedy and whether you can stomach that, and Alfred and his professor are caught and locked up for the ball later that night.

They escape, sneak into the ball and just barely make it out with their lives and Sarah, who was bitten again and drained (which neither of them know). On the way back out, the Professor remains unaware he is, in fact, bringing the plague of vampires back home by bringing along the newly turned SArah and Alfred, whom she promptly bites.

(The musical has a banging ending sequence, once again with dancing, and men in tight pants. Hmmm.)

I tried to keep it short and uh, failed, so, hey, enjoy.

I should note that the inkeeeper is very much jewish, it is a major point in the story, and that plus the fact there’s a joke that essentially goes ‘aren’t gay people just WEIRD?’ makes me hesitant to tell everyone to watch the movie. It IS very old. The musical handles things a bit better, I think, feel free to ask on details as to why but again, this is getting way too long already...

tell us about one of your favorite characters and why you like them!

Outside of being the most heteronormative thing to ever hetero, I really like Alfred in the stage version! (the movie is uh, well, it has Roman Polaski in it, and is kinda. Hmmm.) He is very genuine about his love and ddespite me not being a huge fan of the love at first sight plot, he makes it somewhat platable. Plus, the version I’ve seen, Lukas Perman, is just... super cute??? Nohomo but some homo, ya know how it is. I also have a bit of a lot of thoughts abt him not being straight and all that, but this is not the space for me to ramble on about that!!!

are there any fun facts or trivia that you would like to share?

The music was almost entirely written by and essentially ripped from Jim Steinman songs, so if you like his music, watch this musical! Do it. I am pointign a knife at you politely.

Less fun fact: Michael Crawford has played the role of the count (You may recognize him as one of the OG Phantoms from Lloyd WebberS’ musical).

Even less fun fact: Polaski was not invovled with the Broadway version due to being disallowed on american soil due to... issues.

The movie had an alternate intro made that was entirely aniamted, to play up the comedy aspect. Not sure if that helped. Its full title was also The Fearless Vampire Killers or, Pardon Me, But Your Teeth Are In My Neck. Most translations make it Dance of the Vampires, which is kept for the musical. (Some languages turn it into ‘The Ball of the Vampires’ instead, the Russian and French versions coming to mind off the top of my head.)

(dabs) you asked for the plot, you get the plot

#jamday #angelwave

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texanredrose · 4 years

Text

Last One - Chapter One

Author’s Note: I’ve warned y’all. Don’t worry, though, if you choose to read, it’s not that scary really.

---

Yang drew in a deep breath, trying to acclimate herself to the cooler temperatures of late autumn in Atlas. Having only moved to the kingdom a few months prior, she found the adaptation curve a bit… steep. Despite the similarities from sharing a global culture, there were some nuances to Atlas as a kingdom that she hadn’t really gotten used to quite yet, and the climate was just one of them.

She was acclimating, though, bit by bit. Yang had secured a job, settled in with her girlfriend alright, and even made a few new friends. Kept in touch with her old ones, of course- Blake and Weiss touched base every week, Ruby every other day, Coco and Velvet when they could, Ren and Nora- but had a lot of things going for her now. Things… were looking up.

As her train pulled into the station, Yang shifted the bag on her shoulder and waited for the door to open. Normally, she’d want to ride her motorcycle to work, but that chill in the air cut straight through even her thickest jacket; definitely something she’d have to leave for the warmer months. It bummed her out but it was worth it, in the end.

Yang stepped onto the train as her scroll began to ring, fishing it out of her bag while standing off to one side and grabbing one of the overhead handholds. A smile curled her lips as she read the contact name, flicking open her scroll to see her girlfriend’s visage. “Hey, Snowdrift.”

“Good morning, Sundrop.” Winter smiled wide, light in her eyes as the line connected. “On your way to work?”

“I am.” She turned the screen, showing the station as a few more commuters stepped on before the doors closed. “How’s your day going so far?”

“Tediously. I’m not a fan of paperwork.” Her expression scrunched up, in that way Yang took to mean ‘I say I don’t like it but I kinda do, but I don’t want to admit that because it’s lame’ and that made her smother a chuckle every time she saw it. “Unfortunately, I’ve got a few meetings today and by the sounds of it, the majority will run long, so I’m going to be late coming home.”

“That’s alright. It sounds like it’ll be a late night for me, too.” She shrugged. “Sounds like one of the other tutors called in sick and I have to cover down. Don’t really know how long it’s gonna take; Mr. Ozpin explained it to me like the kids don’t go to school at all, so I’ve got a lot of subjects to cover.”

A frown touched her girlfriend’s lips. “Are you sure this is what you want to do? I know teaching is your dream, Sundrop, but this doesn’t seem to be exactly what you had in mind.”

“It’s not long term, and they know that.” Again, she couldn’t help but shrug, brushing off the woman’s concern. “I’d rather have something to do while I wait for Atlas to approve my teaching license and this homeschooling thing is the only agency that recognizes Vale’s certification.”

“Which, honestly, is ridiculous.” Winter’s expression shifted into what Yang would call a pout, though she would only do so teasingly. “It’s a standardized test across the five kingdoms; why Atlas insists on a separate validation is beyond me.”

At that, she couldn’t help but laugh. “Do you want the honest answer or the nice answer?”

“Just because we both know why doesn’t mean I can’t express my vexation with it.” Her annoyance slid away, blue eyes glancing off to the side before rolling. “Ah, it appears I am needed. Let me know if you need anything; depending on who gets home first, picking up dinner or delivery might be the best option.”

Yang raised a brow. “Already tired of my cooking?”

“Oh, don’t you start.” Despite the light reprimand, Winter smiled softly. “I adore your cooking but I also adore cuddling, and neither of us will rest if there are dishes that need washing.”

“Hmmm, keep sweet-talking me and I won’t be able to focus on lessons.”

“Well, we can’t have that, now.” Glancing around, the woman raised her other hand to her mouth and blew a kiss. “I love you, Sundrop.”

“Love you, too, Snowdrift.” She waved. “I’ll call you if I get a break.”

As she collapsed her scroll back down, Yang’s gaze caught on her reflection in the train’s window. Granted, she probably didn’t look as ‘professional’ as most private tutors would; a nice set of black slacks, a white button up, a purple tie that complemented her eyes rather nicely, and some good leather shoes got her close but she’d never been able to tame her hair, the blonde strands curling and sticking out every which way. It didn’t look like she hadn’t brushed it, just that her style tended towards ‘wild’ which… while not entirely inaccurate, wasn’t the whole truth, either. Add to that her slightly crooked nose from a boxing match in her youth and a stature that better suited the common perception of a bodybuilder than a teacher- basically, she didn’t blame people for being skeptical when she introduced herself as having her teacher’s license in Vale and a master’s from Beacon University to boot.

She ran a hand through her hair, trying to tame it just a bit as the train rattled down the tracks, passing through one of the few tunnels on this route. Before she could head to the house, she had to stop by the office and get the full details from Mr. Ozpin regarding the job itself. He hadn’t explained much over the phone, seeing as this came across as an emergency of some sort, but she imagined there’d be more information when she reached the home office. Since Yang only had one regular client, her work thus far had centered mostly on group sessions at a private school on the north side of the city, where the upper crust lived.

Yang cleared her throat and straightened out her tie, trying to keep her nerves from getting the better of her. Among some of the differences in Atlas she’d encountered, the differences between upper class and middle class were… stark. Generally, people stuck to their ‘side of the fence’, which she didn’t really get, considering Vale’s far more lax social structure.

Every time she started thinking about how she would never ‘fit in’ or ‘pass’ among Atlas’ social elite, she remembered that her girlfriend was not only born in that environment, she was raised to be near the top of the social ladder and walked away from it of her own volition. It made her feel so lucky, because beneath some of her rougher edges and her cool demeanor, Winter was passionate and warm and beautiful and she couldn’t imagine where she’d be without their paths crossing.

Aside from, well, warmer, but that was a minor thing.

Once she got to her stop, Yang hopped off the train and made her way to the office building. The agency she worked for owned only a small section of the building multiplex, containing only a few full time positions and three conference rooms for meetings. It paid well enough, even if it wasn’t what she wanted to be doing. She considered it a stepping stone to the life she wanted to build in Atlas.

Opening the glass door with the agency’s name on it- Maiden Education, a silly pun she could appreciate- Yang went to the doorway leading into Mr. Ozpin’s office and politely knocked on the doorjamb.

“Hmmm?” Mr. Ozpin turned, green eyes lighting up upon seeing her. “Ah, Miss Xiao Long, come in. Thank you for understanding; this is… a unique situation.”

“It’s no problem; I’m happy to help,” she replied, stepping into the small office and sitting down. Mr. Ozpin’s desk was a haphazard collection of papers, just barely shuffled into piles, and his shaggy silvered hair bespoke of a charmingly frazzled appearance. It was one of the reasons she opted to take the job; she rather liked having someone who understood that life happened and appearances weren’t everything. “So, what’s the skinny?”

“This is one of our more… unique clients, to put it simply.” He shuffled a few papers before pulling out a folder from one of the stacks and opening it up. “They recently moved to Atlas and, up until now, Ms. Goodwitch had been handling their case.”

That surprised Yang more than the call asking her to cover down. “Wait, Glynda? She’s sick? I thought nothing short of a natural disaster could stop her from coming into work.”

Glynda Goodwitch had overseen her short probationary period with the agency. Strict, terse, and exacting, the woman exuded the confidence of an experienced and unflappable teacher who’d seen it all and done it all. She honestly couldn’t imagine how sick she had to be to stay home.

“Frankly, I’m assuming she’s sick; I haven’t been able to get her on the phone and she usually stops by the office before heading out to this particular house.” He sighed. “This isn’t like her, but she’s confided in me within the past two weeks, and I have reason to believe her absence is health related.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.” Worry pinched her brow. “I hope she’s alright.”

“I do, too.” Mr. Ozpin shook his head, then glanced down at the file. “At any rate, the house is on the north side of town- quite remote. I’m afraid your scroll will have spotty reception at best.”

She cringed. “Damn, I guess I should’ve rode to work this morning. I took the train.”

“Not to worry; you can use my car for today. I likely won’t be leaving, considering how much paperwork I’ve yet to do.” He gestured at one of the stacks and she had to assume that was his ‘to-do’ pile. “Once you arrive, you’ll meet with your students: Roman, Cinder, Mercury, and Emerald.”

“Okay. I can work with four kids. What are their ages?”

“Ah, no, they’re all adults- orphans who banded together and formed something of a family. They’ve come to Atlas to start a new life and need assistance studying for the equivalency exams.”

That set her at ease a bit; while her specialty leaned more heavily into sciences, Yang had just completed her own equivalency exam so she could submit for her license, so she more than understood all the red tape involved. “I can see why you called me.”

“Honestly, I debated on giving you these clients initially, but I thought it might be a bit too much for you to start with.” Mr. Ozpin gave her an apologetic look. “Ms. Goodwitch is one of my longest-standing employees and an excellent educator; she’d dealt with similar clients in the past, I’m sure you understand.”

“Oh, I don’t take any offense.” She chuckled, waving off his explanation. “She’s definitely one of the best colleagues I’ve ever worked with.”

Mr. Ozpin smiled and nodded, folding up the file and holding it out to her. “Here, take this just in case. Ms. Goodwitch has their lesson plans outlined here; you’ll spend two hours with all four of them, then thirty minutes with each. After you’ve completed their tutoring, come back here and I’ll drive you home.”

Yang accepted the file with a smile. “Sounds pretty straightforward. I won’t let you down, Mr. Ozpin.”

“I’m sure you won’t.”

With the file and Mr. Ozpin’s keys in hand, Yang headed for the door. While she hoped Ms. Goodwitch’s health improved, she saw this as an opportunity to prove herself in a sense. If she could continue tutoring the family until Ms. Goodwitch returned, it would surely look good on her resume when her license finally came through. As she jumped into Mr. Ozpin’s car, she sent a quick text apprising Winter of the situation, just so the woman wouldn’t worry. Then, she plugged in the address and studied the map just in case her scroll lost signal before she got there. Within a few minutes, she had a pretty solid grasp on where she was going, pulling out of Mr. Ozpin’s spot and heading towards the north side of the city.

[hr][/hr]

About half an hour later, Yang pulled up in front of a rather spacious mansion- not entirely uncommon for the northern side of Atlas- and let out a low whistle as she put the car into park. It reminded her of her girlfriend’s childhood home, which she’d only visited a handful of times. Winter and Weiss both complained about how all the space made them feel crushingly alone and both sought to escape it, though she imagined the sisters had a very different life experience than her four prospective students. For four people who didn’t have any family aside from each other, having such a large place to call their home might give them a sense of security or peace.

The woman got out of the car with her bag and the file securely within, taking a deep breath to settle her nerves before starting towards the door.

However, her step faltered as she took another look at the house and noticed something… odd. From the ground level, it looked like some of the second floor windows were broken while others were boarded up or obscured in some manner. The first floor looked better but every curtain was drawn shut which seemed… strange. Then again, she was the sort of person who loved letting natural sunlight illuminate a room. Still, it seemed strange that such a large house sat in a state of relative disrepair with four people living inside. Maybe they were trying to renovate it?

No matter what justification she offered within the privacy of her own mind, Yang had to put all that aside and present herself the same way Ms. Goodwitch would. From the trials and internships she’d taken as part of her teaching degree, she understood that anyone familiar with a teacher suddenly subjected to someone different had an ingrained reaction to distrust the newcomer; as long as she didn’t make waves, she’d be able to continue with the lesson plans Ms. Goodwitch had set forth without trouble.

After she marshaled her thoughts, though, she then took a few more steps forward and saw the front door slightly ajar.

Alarm bells began to ring, putting her on high alert. A reasonable explanation pushed to the forefront of her mind- they were expecting Ms. Goodwitch, so they might leave the door open for her and just hadn’t closed it when she was running late- but that didn’t ease the sudden anxiety curling in the pit of her stomach. This just all seemed so... strange.

“Hello?” she called out while slowly advancing to the door, peering inside. From what she could tell, nothing looked too out of place- no sign of a struggle within the expansive foyer- but that didn’t exactly mean much, considering the size of the house. Between the remote location and lack of scroll service, she felt reasonably confident that there hadn’t been some sort of burglary; aside from the car Mr. Ozpin lent her, there wasn’t another around for miles. “I’m from the Maiden Education Agency. Ms. Goodwitch wasn’t able to make it today, so…”

When no answer came, she carefully pushed the front door open a bit further and stepped into the mansion.

The interior looked like it was in the process of being updated, with a fresh coat of paint in a few places and crumbling wallpaper elsewhere. A few boxes sat by the staircase leading up to the second floor, next to some cans of paint and rollers leaning up against the banister. A coat rack on one side of the foyer had a white coat and black bowler hung on two of the pegs, plus a pink umbrella on the third peg, which seemed to indicate someone was home.

“Hello?” She took a few more cautious steps into the foyer, trying to check around the corners. Every now and again, Winter would show her videos of the training exercises she conducted with the Atlesian military, and she tried to apply those principles now. Listening intently, she crept to the doorway leading towards what she assumed to be the living room, peeking into the room carefully.

What she saw confused her. On the one hand, it looked like a living room or den in the middle of being remodeled, but the way things were strewn about didn’t seem like they had a purpose or plan. It looked like a mess.

Before she could enter the room, she caught the sound of a stifled cry coming from behind her, prompting her to look back around and into the room on the other side of the foyer. Judging by the size, it probably served a similar purpose- a living room or den or something- but it hadn’t been remodeled yet, just new furniture set inside a room with crumbling wallpaper and discolored carpet. Two couches, a loveseat, a few arm chairs, and a coffee table sat in the middle of the room, away from the walls, as if in preparation for the walls to be repainted.

“Is anyone there?” She tried again, moving towards the other room. “I’m Ms. Xiao Long, from the Maiden Education Agency. I’m subbing for Ms. Goodwitch.”

Again, she heard the stifled cry, and followed the sound to its source, looking behind the couch and finding a young woman probably close to her age, curled up with her knees hugged to her chest. Yang slowly lowered herself down onto one knee and softened her voice.

“Hey, my name’s Yang. Are you Emerald?” She looked like the picture from the file but… rougher, mint green hair that fell to her shoulders looking unwashed and unkempt, her shirt and jeans ripped and dirty. “Hey?”

When she reached out and touched the woman’s shoulder, she flinched and looked at Yang then with wide, terrified red eyes, tears streaking her dirty cheeks. The moment she seemed to register that there was someone there, though, a bit of light came back to her eyes. “Who are you?”

“Yang, Yang Xiao Long. I’m subbing for Ms. Goodwitch.” She took a glance around. “Where’s everyone else?”

“Gone,” she replied, her hands trembling as her gaze shifted up, looking towards the ceiling. “They’re… they’re all gone. It’s just me.”

Yang’s brows furrowed, looking towards the ceiling briefly. “Is there a landline? Some way to call for help?”

“No one can help me now.” Emerald started shaking her head as fresh tears sprang to her eyes. “She left me for last.” Then, she grabbed Yang’s arm, clutching at her feebly. “Don’t look her in the eyes. That’s when she comes for you- that’s when she knows she has you. Don’t look her in the eyes.”

“Who? Who is ‘she’?” Although the grip on her arm didn’t hurt, it made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up, as if her entire body could sense there was something not right about the woman before her.

“I-I don’t know, we never learned her name. We just-”

Thunk.

Yang looked back up to the ceiling, furrowing her brows. It sounded like something heavy had been dropped on the floor above them but, if they were the only ones there, then what had dropped and how? Emerald released her arm, curling back in on herself and crying softly.

Whatever had happened here, Yang quickly surmised she needed some help. Reaching into her bag, she retrieved her scroll to find it had no signal. With a frown, she stood up and looked around, spotting what looked like a wall-mounted vid screen in the next room over. With any luck, that had a landline connection and she could call for help.

Moving into the next room, she saw more evidence of the remodeling in progress- a dining room set and rolls of carpet, more paint cans and spare lumber- but thankfully found the vid screen had a connection. Dialing Atlas’ emergency services line, Yang waited for the operator to connect the call while looking up at the ceiling.

“Atlas Emergency Response, where is your emergency?”

That pulled her gaze back to the screen, finding one of Atlas’ finest staring at the screen. Quickly, she gave the address and a brief explanation of why she was there and what she’d found, glancing over to the living room to find Emerald still curled up behind the couch. After being assured police and medical services were on the way, the call ended and Yang considered going outside to wait for them.

“Hey, Emerald?” She went back to the living room and knelt down beside the woman again, keeping her voice soft. “Why don’t we go outside, yeah? Help is on the way; you’re gonna be okay.”

“No, no, no.” With a shake of her head, red eyes focused again on the ceiling. “I can’t run anymore. It won’t work.”

“Emerald, listen, it’s okay-”

Thunk.

She looked at the ceiling, brows furrowed as the woman’s crying renewed.

“Emerald, is there anyone else here?”

“No. Just me. I’m the last one.” She drew in a shuddering breath. “The last one.”

“Then what was that noise?”

Emerald slowly shook her head and hugged herself tighter, crying more fervently.

Yang stood up. Whatever had happened, obviously the woman wouldn’t recover for a long time.

Lilac eyes strayed towards the ceiling, curiosity nipping at her. “Emerald, are you the last one here? Or the last one alive?” When no answer came, she looked back to the woman, who watched her with terror. “Nod if the first one.” She didn’t. “Nod for the second.”

Slowly, Emerald nodded, confirming Yang’s suspicion.

Okay, so the others had died on the second floor, and finding them dead had scared Emerald shitless.

But… what was that sound, then?

“Are you sure they’re dead?”

“They’re gone.”

“Emerald-”

“They’re gone.”

Yang sighed, glancing back towards the ceiling. On the one hand, she could wait until the cops showed up and hope they’d tell her that there was nothing she could have done. On the other, she could go up there and confirm for herself. Otherwise, she’d always wonder if she’d waited outside while someone slowly died on the second floor.

Pulling out her scroll, Yang flicked it over to the camera setting to start a recording. Just in case the cops had any questions about what she had touched. Then, she started for the main staircase, taking the first step cautiously.

“Don’t look her in the eyes,” Emerald said, still hiding behind the couch.

“Right.”

With a heavy sigh, she continued up the stairs, seeing more signs of the deteriorating walls and holding her scroll to document her journey to the second floor. Once she reached the landing, Yang looked both ways down the hall, finding several doors slightly ajar. She turned right, heading down that way seeing as it was above the living room where Emerald was still huddled. The floorboards beneath her feet creaked and groaned, just as she imagined an old mansion would, but that didn’t settle her nerves any.

As she reached the last room on the left, directly above where she’d been standing in the living room, a stench hit her nose that made her gag. On some level, she realized that the smell alone confirmed no one inside the room was alive, but her conscience wouldn’t rest without seeing it with her own two eyes.

So, against her better judgement, Yang pushed open the door.

She swallowed hard as her heart pounded in her chest, her body breaking out in a cold sweat.

Two corpses lay lifelessly on the ground, their eyes open wide in their final death stare. One of them a man- Roman, with orange hair just like his picture- and the other a woman, with pink and brown strands framing her face, and heterochromatic eyes that matched her dual colored hair. Both of them had crumpled to the floor, heads at odd angles with ropes around their necks. Looking up, Yang saw a wooden beam stretching from one side of the room to the other, rope still tied in two places above the bodies. They were both dressed rather well, as if they’d been preparing to go out for a night on the town among the upper crust.

Now, they were dead. Lying there, motionless.

“I’m sorry,” she said, pulling the door closed and shaking herself. Passing a hand over her face, she wiped away the sweat that had formed on her brow and turned around, spotting another door. While she didn’t know anything about the woman with heterochromia, she’d accounted for two of the four people she knew resided in the house. That still left two for her to find.

Going across the hall, she pushed the door open while holding her breath, relieved when she stepped into an empty bedroom with a few sleeping bags laid out on cots. The next two rooms she checked were similarly devoid of people- one had a mass of furniture collected in the middle and the other completely barren- but the third on the other side of the hall from the staircase made her gut clench.

It looked like Mercury, with well-groomed silver hair, his eyes wide open while his body slumped against the far wall in yet another empty room. Given the angle of his head, his neck was snapped by something, though he didn’t have a rope to explain how he’d died. He was wearing jeans and a jacket, both well worn, and heavy boots- he looked like he might’ve been working on painting the room before whatever happened to him, considering the ladder nearby.

“What the fuck,” she said, her voice soft as she closed the door. With the empty rooms she’d left the doors open, to make it easier for the cops when they arrived. A numbness started spreading through her as she mechanically walked to the next few rooms, leaving their doors open. When she came to the last at the end of the hall, she had a feeling she knew exactly what she would find, but opened it anyway.

Unlike the other rooms, this one was entirely furnished and remodeled. Dark red on the walls, black carpet, and a four-poster bed- the interior decor choices unnerved her almost as much as the woman’s stare, raven hair cascading over her shoulder as she hung there, knees just an inch or so shy of the edge of the bed, rope around her neck connected to a wire frame for the canopy overhead. She wore a black robe over a red nightgown, as if she was just getting ready for bed when…

Even without make-up or a smirk, Yang recognized the woman as Cinder, the last of the unaccounted-for orphans.

She hit the button on her scroll, stopping the recording as she pulled the door closed. Her hand trembled but she tried to keep a hold on herself, stumbling back towards the staircase landing. In the distance, through the broken mirrors, she could hear the approaching sirens of the police or the ambulance, only one of which was actually needed. Yang moved closer to one of the windows, the broken one, seeing as the other was covered almost in its entirety.

Carefully, mindful of the jagged edges of the glass, she watched as patrol cars began winding their way towards the manor with an ambulance following closely. Soon, the cops would be here and start sorting through… whatever had happened. Even having seen it with her own eyes, she couldn’t begin to process it. Too numb from the shock of it all.

Four people dead, and one half crazed for some reason.

As she started to turn away, she caught something in the broken glass. A reflection of the landing behind her, but there was someone standing there. Short hair and a cloak of some sort? Yang turned, expecting to find Emerald, but instead saw a woman with brown hair and garish bruises on her neck, expression twisted by rage, and wide brown eyes. She opened her mouth and screamed, a terrifying sound that came out strangled and broken and screeching and Yang jumped back while putting her hands over her ears, trying to make it stop.

When it did, she took shuddering breaths while looking at the top of the staircase. The woman wasn’t there anymore but a little red book sat on the top step where she’d been standing.

“Who the fuck…” She looked around, unsure of where the strange woman had gone, and cautiously made her way to the staircase. Kneeling down, she picked up the book- a diary, by the looks of it- as the sounds of sirens drew closer. She shoved it in her bag while hurrying down the steps, turning into the living room to grab Emerald so they could both get out of the house before that strange woman-

Yang came to a dead stop, her heart stuttering in her chest as her eyes went wide.

From the center of the ceiling, a rope extended down, though she couldn’t tell where it was anchored. Then again, she wasn’t really looking, more fixated on Emerald’s dead stare as she hung lifelessly, the rope around her throat tight until- for some reason- it detached from its anchor point and she fell, crashing onto the coffee table below.

Immediately, Yang turned and booked it out the front door, tripping on the doorway in her haste and having to catch herself with her hands, her legs never stopping. She somehow got back to her feet and ran to the other side of Mr. Ozpin’s car, turning around to ensure no one had followed her out even as she heard the patrol cars and ambulance come up behind her, pulling through the circular drive.

As she desperately tried to catch her breath, lilac eyes roved over the house, stopping at the window she’d looked out on the second floor. There, she saw the strange woman again, watching her for a moment and gone in a blink of an eye. Yet, even with her gone, Yang could still feel herself being watched.

Even as the cops got out of their cars, even as the paramedics came to check her out, even as she stuttered and stumbled through her explanation of what happened, she could feel it.

She was being watched.

#TRR writes #Elderburn #Supernatural Horror story

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diepower · 4 years

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THE MEGA RP PLOTTING SHEET / MEME.

First and foremost, recall that no one is perfect, we all had witnessed some plotting once which did not went too well, be it because of us or our partner. So here have this, which may help for future plotting. It’s a lot! Yes, but perhaps give your partners some insight? Anyway BOLD what fully applies, italicize if only somewhat.

MUN NAME: Kaiman AGE: 27 CONTACT: IM, ask, discord

CHARACTER(S): Meninas McAllon, Orihime Inoue, Retsu Unohana, Mashiro Kuna, Tier Harribel, Charlotte Chuuhlhourne

CURRENT FANDOM(S): That I write in? It’s gonna be Bleach, OVW (super selectively im just here for one person), ASOIAF (barely- literally when the mood strikes and that one is private also). I have a lot of current interests in general though.

BLEACH FANDOM(S) YOU HAVE AN AU FOR: While I don’t have anything fully established... I’ve been working with an ASOIAF au (for Harribel & Unohana specifically, though I’m considering it with other characters too), A Dorohedoro AU (for Unohana and Orihime), as well as a Persona AU (more specifically 2&3) for Orihime. I’ve also got a number of post-canon AUs or continuities for all my characters as well!

MY LANGUAGE(S): English, super basic Spanish, barest ASL, fairly good French

THEMES I’M INTERESTED IN FOR RP: FANTASY / SCIENCE FICTION / HORROR / WESTERN / ROMANCE / THRILLER / MYSTERY / DYSTOPIA / ADVENTURE / MODERN / EROTIC / CRIME / MYTHOLOGY / CLASSIC / HISTORY / RENAISSANCE / MEDIEVAL / ANCIENT / WAR / FAMILY / POLITICS / RELIGION / SCHOOL / ADULTHOOD / CHILDHOOD / APOCALYPTIC / GODS / SPORT / MUSIC / SCIENCE / FIGHTS / ANGST / SMUT / DRAMA

PREFERRED THREAD LENGTH: ONE-LINER / 1 PARA / 2 PARA / 3+ / NOVELLA (2para is a sweet spot but it really doesn’t matter to me)

ASKS CAN BE SEND BY: MUTUALS / NON-MUTUALS / PERSONALS / ANONS.

CAN ASKS BE CONTINUED?: YES / NO ONLY BY MUTUALS?: YES / NO

PREFERRED THREAD TYPE: CRACK / CASUAL NOTHING TOO DEEP / SERIOUS / DEEP AS HECK.

IS REALISM / RESEARCH IMPORTANT FOR YOU IN CERTAIN THEMES?: YES / NO.

ARE YOU ATM OPEN FOR NEW PLOTS?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.

DO YOU HANDLE YOUR DRAFT / ASK - COUNT WELL?: YES / NO / SOMEWHAT. (i let them build up too often but some of yall are too quick to reply jkglfjdgsd)

HOW LONG DO YOU USUALLY TAKE TO REPLY?: 24H / 1 WEEK / 2 WEEKS / 3+ / MONTHS / YEARS / DEPENDS ON MOOD AND INSPIRATION, AND IF I’M BUSY

I’M OKAY WITH INTERACTING: ORIGINAL CHARACTERS / A RELATIVE OF MY CHARACTER (AN OC) / DUPLICATES / MY FANDOM / CROSSOVERS / MULTI-MUSES / SELF-INSERTS / PEOPLE WITH NO AU VERSE FOR MY FANDOM / CANON-DIVERGENT PORTRAYALS / AU-VERSIONS (italicized are okay, but under really specific circumstances)

DO YOU POST MORE IC OR OOC?: IC / OOC.

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WITH FOLLOWING OTHERS?: YES / NO / DEPENDS

BEST WAYS TO APPROACH YOU FOR RP/PLOTTING: I’m pretty anal about plotting in that I often refuse to RP unless it’s been plotted or I liked a starter call. And in the case of the latter, I’ll still hop into DMs to plot further depending on where the thread takes us. That said, the best way to reach me is through IMs or Discord (available on request). The only time I turn down plots is if I feel like it would put my character in an OOC situation, and I especially dislike my character being one-sidedly used as a tool to further another character’s development without anything being reciprocated (this happens often especially wrt my healer characters)

WHAT EXPECTATIONS DO YOU HOLD TOWARDS YOUR PLOTTING PARTNER: Communication is really important to me, especially with regards to comfort regarding certain plot elements, and approaching other in-character situations that might have multiple different solutions. I think it’s important that both characters involved get the same amount of development out of writing a thread, and I really hate the idea of being imbalanced as far as that goes (more on that below). That said, I’m always perfectly down to spitball plot ideas and tweak/refine other concepts because I really do enjoy plotting, it’s just super important to me that things are communicated clearly. I get extremely distressed and frustrated IRL if people just kinda throw stuff at me, and it often kills my muse.

WHEN YOU NOTICE THE PLOTTING IS RATHER ONE-SIDED, WHAT DO YOU DO?: I make an active effort to come up with plots that are engaging and beneficial fairly equally to both parties. I mentioned this above, but especially in the case of writing my healer characters, I have a huge disdain for characters being used as tools to further development while getting nothing substantial in return. That said, I try to be very aware of this in terms of a potential writing partner being on the receiving end. IMO it feels like shit, but I definitely don’t want to make someone else feel that way either. That said, so long as stuff is plotted out clearly and me and the writer are both okay with it, then it’s fine. COMMUNICATION IS KEY, BASICALLY.

HOW DO YOU USUALLY PLOT WITH OTHERS, DO YOU GIVE INPUT OR LEAVE MOST WORK TOWARDS YOUR PARTNER?: I kinda just like to throw spaghetti at the wall and whatever sticks, I’m down to fly with. I have a lot of ideas, but again, I like to give my partners the option of doing whatever they’re comfortable with, and h aving equal contribution opportunities.

WHEN A PARTNER DROPS THE THREAD, DO YOU WISH TO KNOW?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.

- AND WHY?: Everyone has their own circumstances, I really don’t mind. If it’s one I’ve been especially looking forward to, I might be bummed, but it’s no skin off my nose really.

WHAT COULD POSSIBLY LEAD YOU TO DROP A THREAD?: I don’t typically drop threads or abandon them during their writing. The only thing that would make me do so is offensive content, or huge plot elements being introduced that makes my character ooc and wasn’t previously discussed during plotting.

WILL YOU TELL YOUR PARTNER?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.

IS COMMUNICATION IN THE RPC IMPORTANT TO YOU? YES / NO.

-AND WHY?: I already feel like I need to take a lot of extra steps to understand others and be understood, and that isn’t something often reciprocated. In my experience, just honest communication is the quickest solution to issues that crop up during writing. For those who HAVE actually had me reach out to them in this way, I really do try to be polite and respectful while being straightforward so the situation can be resolved without any hurt feelings.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH ABSOLUTE HONESTY, EVEN IF IT MAY MEANS HEARING SOMETHING NEGATIVE ABOUT YOU AND/OR PORTRAYAL?: As long as it’s constructive, and not merely negativity, I welcome it. After all, I can’t fix a huge flaw in my writing without having an alternative solution. I’m open to accepting feedback and critique, especially wrt Meninas since my portrayal is quite a large departure from popular fanon perception (from those who choose to pay attention to her, lol), but I also thrive on suggested remedies and solutions to issues in my writing.

DO YOU THINK YOU CAN HANDLE SUCH SITUATION IN A MATURE WAY? YES / NO.

WHY DO YOU RP AGAIN, IS THERE A GOAL?: I like to tell stories, and I like to tell narratives that take root in emotional expression and how those feelings can act as a vehicle to the storytelling. I want to move people through feeling, because it can be a powerful experience. I use a lot of inspiration from themes in my other favorite series, as well as inspiration from my own personal experiences as well. I tend to pick characters who have one or two traits in common with myself, whether those be negative or positive. I’m very excited to share all the things I have planned for Meninas, as she’s certainly my most ambitious project to date.

WISHLIST, BE IT PLOTS OR SCENARIOS: For Meninas specifically, I want to interact with Squad 11 and Squad 9 during the CFYOW verse I have planned. Hisagi specifically would be interesting because of the clash of ideals, in addition to being the only other living person to be able to relate to the horror of being under Pepe’s thrall. I’d also like to steal Ikkaku’s bankai, and have more fight scenes. Lastly, Meninas doesn’t do much of anything in CFYOW, so more interactions with Mayuri and Squad 12 would be cool.

THEMES I WON’T EVER RP / EXPLORE: I don’t mind briefly referencing darker themes in my writing, especially wrt my own personal experiences, but I want to be very clear that I refuse to write at length or romanticize these themes. I refuse to write anything involving rape, homophobia, transphobia, racism, pedophilia, etc, with this in mind.

WHAT TYPE OF STARTERS DO YOU PREFER / DISLIKE, CAN’T WORK WITH?: Unless previously discussed, I struggle with starters that have a character pushing mine away. If the situation is super OOC for my character to be in, or frankly too mundane. In Meninas’ case, most domestic stuff is a snoozefest for me (but I LOVE this for other characters).

WHAT TYPE OF CHARACTERS CATCH YOUR INTEREST THE MOST?: *saoirse ronan voice* Women. UHHH but no, for real... I like fleshing out female characters quite a bit. Personality types are varied, but I like characters who have some level of nuance to their emotional expression whether it’s an internal or external struggle. I like powerful women too, and the exploration of “strength” as a theme (esp at the intersection of the theme of “femininity” and its expressions) whether this is external strength or internal fortitude. I think I play a wide variety of characters who have vastly different thoughts, beliefs, and forms of expression, but I try to find something in common with who I portray to act as a touch stone. I also like characters who have themes of “justice” and nuanced morality.

WHAT TYPE OF CHARACTERS CATCH YOUR INTEREST THE LEAST?: 99% of male characters. And I also hate tsunderes gjklsdjfd

WHAT ARE YOUR STRONG ASPECTS AS RP PARTNER?: I really like my writing style especially wrt using emotion to set a cinematic scene and overall tone. I think I’m really strong with conveying emotion, especially with things that are often unspoken. I try to communicate with partners clearly and establish rapports. I love writing headcanons and have a TON of plot ideas as well.

WHAT ARE YOUR WEAK ASPECTS AS RP PARTNER?: Oh I’m the slowest replier on the planet and I’m apparently intimidating lol

DO YOU RP SMUT?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.

DO YOU PREFER TO GO INTO DETAIL?: YES / NO / DEPENDS (i prefer to go into detail about sensations, rather than the actual acts as it comes off stifled and weirdly technical)

ARE YOU OKAY WITH BLACK CURTAIN?: YES / NO

- WHEN DO YOU RP SMUT? MORE OUT OF FUN OR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT?: Honestly I just do what Meninas tells me.

- ANYTHING YOU WOULD NOT WANT TO RP THERE?: Kink stuff is weird territory for me, absolutely gotta be discussed in private and comfort levels clearly established.

ARE SHIPS IMPORTANT TO YOU?: YES / NO. Relationships in general rule, and while I do have a romantic ship that plays a large part in Meninas’ plot, the romance comes secondary to the plot itself. I really enjoy writing and developing romances, but more than that I like establishing connections. I love the relationships I’ve got planned with Giselle, Candice, Liltotto, and Bambietta because there are going to be a LOT of drastically different things that inform my portrayal of Meninas coming from these relationships (both positive and negative, but ultimately places of growth).

WOULD YOU SAY YOUR BLOG IS SHIP-FOCUSED?: YES / NO. Like I said, plot comes first. And especially in the case of Meninas, she has a lot of self exploration and reflection to do before she can engage in a healthy relationship or address any feelings of romance. I do place a large focus on the formation of her relationships and how they shape the way she relates to other people and grows as a person, but I am extremely sensitive to making sure I’m not writing a female character who’s entire development is dependent on a romance with a male character- perish the thought lol.

DO YOU USE READ MORE?: YES / NO / SOMETIMES WHEN I WRITE LONG STUFF.

ARE YOU: MULTI-SHIP / SINGLE-SHIP / DUAL-SHIP — MULTIVERSE / Singleverse.

WHAT DO YOU LOVE TO EXPLORE THE MOST IN YOUR SHIPS?: For Meninas, it’s a matter of her acknowledging, understanding, and accepting that she can be worth more than how useful she is to others. She had a series of traumatizing and character defining experiences regarding love, romance, and personal worth that strongly shaped the way she perceives her relationships to others and her emotional expression. Trust is another huge factor for me, Meninas needs to be around someone she believes in. Strength is another aspect. She likes someone who challenges her, keeps her on her toes, and is sturdy like physically. Because she’ll break you. THAT SAID- Meninas tends to be open wrt her body, but closed off when it comes to her heart. Hate to see it, love to write it.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PRE-ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIPS?: YES / NO. As long as the premise makes sense. I like relationships to have some matter of significance and planning, especially because of how I’ve written the way Meninas picks and chooses who to get close to in Silbern depending on what suits her interests. Genuine friendship is a weird thing for Meninas, as most of her relationships are formed out of convenience. If you aren’t useful to Meninas’ schemeing, then she has no interest in dealing with you beyond platitudes and keeping up appearances and will interact with you as such.

► SECTION ABOUT YOUR MUSE.

- WHAT COULD POSSIBLY MAKE YOUR MUSE INTERESTING TOWARDS OTHERS, WHY SHOULD THEY RP WITH THIS PARTICULAR CHARACTER OF YOURS NOW, WHAT POSSIBLE PLOTS DO THEY OFFER?: WE LOVE DUPLICITOUS WOMEN! No, but at the core of my Meninas characterization, the sentiment is “Everything is not as it appears” even down to the relationships she has with others. Meninas’ entire personality is constructed as a survival tactic from an early age (in addition to being a way to make herself more useful as a tool to others, and thus seen as having more worth in general), and as a result, she hasn’t really allowed herself to live life as a fully realized person. Her plots generally offer silent rebellion, playing a role in regards to her self presentation, chaotic mean girl level bullshit, and cool fights/training. Also you get to interact with a big buff lady. That said about her personality, it depends on the verse. CFYOW Meninas will be more unhinged, while post-CFYOW Meninas will be more honest and rowdy.

- WITH WHAT TYPE OF MUSES DO YOU USUALLY STRUGGLE TO RP WITH?: Muses who are standoffish or disengage right at the start. Meninas doesn’t interact with people without a certain purpose, so if they aren’t interested, she’s not going to be either.

- WHAT DO THEY DESIRE, IS THEIR GOAL?: Revenge, strength, redefining what “power” means in terms of how the world works. She wants to see the Shinigami dead for their role in her parents deaths, and feels the same about Yhwach.

- WHAT CATCHES THEIR INTEREST FIRST WHEN MEETING SOMEONE NEW?: Ability, potential threat, perceived strength, where loyalty lies; how potentially useful you can be to her.

- WHAT DO THEY VALUE IN A PERSON?: Strength both in a physical sense, but also in belief and convictions. Honesty, and understanding the flaws of the world they live in.

- WHAT THEMES DO THEY LIKE TALKING ABOUT?: Fighting, beauty, freedom, abolishing Quincy classism based on blood purity, music, fashion, blacksmithing.

- WHICH THEMES BORE THEM?: Blind loyalty to Yhwach, talking about the horrors of war as if it doesn’t concern them, Bambietta, Quincy supremacy,

- DID THEY EVER WENT THROUGH SOMETHING TRAUMATIC?: Her parents were killed in the first Quincy war and she was left abandoned and grew up literally fighting for her life and living on the streets. She often likens fighting pits to the bowels of Hell (and I often play with the ironic theme of crawling out of hell to appear as an angel or something divine). She is consumed by a quest for revenge, and strongly believes her ends will justify the means taken to fulfill her ideal. As a direct result of these experiences, her emotional health and maturity is severely affected, and she doesn’t view herself as a person worthy or capable of feeling as much as a tool who, in the right hands, can be utilized to bring about the revenge she craves.

- WHAT COULD LEAD TO AN INSTANT KILL?: (1) Men who feel non-consensually entitled to her body. That said, she’s done a fairly excellent job at maintaining control and an unassuming threatening nature despite the widely known understanding of her Schrift ability and how it augments. (2) Someone touching her Quincy cross, as it’s her most precious and private item. (3) Anyone who dares get in the way of her plans that can’t be manipulated in some other useful aspect.

- IS THERE SOMEONE /-THING THEY HATE?: Meninas hates Yhwach, and the Shinigami most predominately, but she also harbors disgust for Hollows as an instinct. That said, her young life was spent detached from Quincy culture (in addition to being a Gemischt and the inherent isolation that comes with that status), so despite her early induction into the Wandenreich ranks, Meninas does not harbor the same Quincy nationalism and loyalty that others of her race do. They’re a means to an end, and just happen to help her become stronger.

IS YOUR MUSE EASY TO APPROACH?: YES / NO. - Best ways to approach them?: She comes off as easy to approach, but if you want genuine Meninas I’m sorry the number you’re trying to reach has been disconnected. Goodbye!

SOMETHING YOU MAY STILL WANT TO POINT OUT ABOUT YOUR MUSE?: Everything I’ve written about her is based in headcanon! I’ve got both a lengthy biography as well as headcanons gathered in the sidebar links on my blog.

CONGRATS!!! You managed it, now tag your mutuals! ♥

TAGGED BY: @bazzardburner TAGGING: i think this has made its rounds so steal it!

#MEME / ANSWERED #HANDS OF THE DIVINE ; A SELF MADE CREATION / HEADCANON #ok take 2 dont delete all my bolded shit pls

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mautadite · 4 years

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april book round up

20 books this month, which i didn’t see coming. i had more free time than expected, even with working from home and *makes vague hand gestures*. i still have a scribd membership so almost all these books came from there. also i’m putting some thought into reviewing on netgalley, so a couple from there as well.

american fairy tale - adriana herrera ⭐️⭐️⭐️ contemporary m/m romance in herrera’s dreamers series that follows immigrants and children of immigrants. this second book was fun, a kind of fairy tale romance as the title suggests. a rich guy/poor guy situation which isn’t usually my cup of tea, and the domineering, throw-money-at-every-situation personality of the rich guy got on my nerves, and i wasn’t totally sold on the way the conflict was resolved? but i enjoyed it. herrera’s books just have this down to earth vibe that i love.

unfit to print - k.j. charles ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ historical m/m romance. vikram, a young lawyer doing a lot of pro-bono work in the indian community in london, lost touch with his childhood friend gil years and years ago, is pretty sure he’s dead. so imagine his surprise when he comes across him in an unlikely occupation in an unlikely place. this was a charming, touching novella, really interesting historically, with a lot of cool titbits about porn in the 19th century. very sweet romance-wise.

american love story - adriana herrera ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ another dreamers novel, this one about a black professor and political activist and a white ADA who had a fling a while back and are now living in the same town. and same apartment building. lol. it did get into real world politics, which i know some people don’t like, but i honestly thought it well done? there were some great bits in this, good insight, one really harrowing moment, and just really great chemistry and character moments.

wanted, a gentleman - k.j. charles ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ more historical m/m romance from k.j. charles, which i always like, but this one i REALLY liked. which surprised me, because it’s a novella, and with novellas you never spend enough time with characters to really know them and their story and get attached? but that’s exactly what happened here. a well-to-do ex-slave and a poor gazette owner team up to untangle a young love affair. i seriously loved this, the characters are so good together. T__T

far from the world we know - harper bliss ⭐️⭐️ contemporary f/f romance about a young widow with a traumatic past who moves to a tiny new town to take care of her ailing aunt, and slowly falls into a relationship with the owner of the local newspaper. the premise was good, but this honestly felt like every single harper bliss book i’ve ever read, except it had nothing to recommend it. ask me why these characters even like each other. i can’t answer!

the hound of justice - claire o'dell ⭐️⭐️ the second book in a series that re-imagines the sherlock holmes universe, except as near-future scifi set during a civil war, and both holmes and watson are black lesbians. i LOVED the first book (with a few caveats) and i’ve been looking forward to this one for so long... but it was disappointing. in terms of the writing, in terms of the direction the characters took, in terms of the plot... i have to wonder if i read the first one with rose-tinted glasses. :/ won’t be continuing this series.

the vintner's luck - elizabeth knox ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ *CLUTCHES MY CHEST WITH BOTH HANDS* in my goodreads review i said i didn’t know how to talk about this novel, and i still don’t. but i ADORED IT. so completely. in early 19th century france, the young son of a winegrower climbs a hill on his father’s property, and there, meets an angel. this is the story of them falling in love, but also about family and friendship, love and death. it’s written SO beautifully, and i’ll be thinking about it for a long time.

the family fang - kevin wilson ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ OOOF. i went into this knowing that several friends loved it so i knew i probably was gonna too and i DID. it’s about two siblings whose parents have been obsessed (since before the birth of their children, and until the present day where they’re both grown) with the idea of creating perfect art, and how the kids survive that. i actually didn’t enjoy reading many parts of this, but only because it was so well written, if that makes sense? like, it took me right in there with some of the shitty emotions and just made me feel. OOOF.

mrs. martin's incomparable adventure - courtney milan ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ a VERY sweet and charming historical f/f romance between a wealthy 74-yo widow and the cute young 69 (nice) yo landlady who comes to ask for her help. and then they have an adventure! i read it at a great time, because i was beginning to feel really bummed out about how people are trivialising and discounting the lives of older people in this crisis, and there was a really great message of like... life not being over until you SAY it’s over, living like you have 20 more years left. i loved it a lot.

his convenient husband - robin covington ⭐️⭐️ m/m contemporary fake marriage story, about a russian ballet dancer and the widowed american football player he marries to get citizenship. and then they fall in love for realsies. i love fake marriage as a trope, it can be so cute but this was very meh. if a book is gonna handle racism/homophobia in such a shallow way... i’d honestly prefer if the book just pretended those things don’t exist lol. :/ it’s also very very rushed and not well plotted at all. alas.

once ghosted, twice shy - alyssa cole ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ alyssa cole is like my good luck charm, because starting here, i read a bunch of lesbian romance novels that i really liked. this one is part of a series about reluctant royals, and follows the dapper assistant to a prince as she falls for a girl who seemingly ghosts her, and then meets her again months later. it’s a novella, and sort of relies on the fact that you would have met one of the characters in a previous book (which i did read). but i really really liked it, thought it was super cute, and the mcs had great chemistry. it was almost insta-love, which i really don’t like... but i still like this book so much. also best cover?? BEST COVER.

who'd have thought - g. benson ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ now THIS is fake marriage done right!!! f/f contemporary romance about a struggling nurse who comes across an ad offering a chunk of money in exchange for one year of marriage... and the person on the offering end turns out to be the cold, stuck-up but brilliant doctor at the hospital where she works. this was the perfect slow burn, with great character writing, really good set-up, very believable arc as they slowly fall in love. it got me so emotional at times. definitely gonna make sure i read more from this author.

three reasons to say yes - jaime clevenger ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ f/f contemporary about two women who strike up a romance while on vacation in hawaii; one an overworked professional, one a doctor-mom of twin girls. another winner for me. just an extremely cute, very genuine butch/femme romance. it’s funny because i definitely nitpicked on a lot of things in this book, but i only remember the parts of if that made me so fond.

we set the dark on fire - tehlor kay meija ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ f/f YA fantasy in a world deeply divided by class. in the upper echelons of society, girls are trained either to become one of the two wives of upper class men; the primera and the segunda. the story follows a girl who has faked her social class becoming the primera of a very powerful man, getting involved with revolutionaries, and developing a surprising relationship with her husband’s segunda. really interesting world-building, some lovely writing, a really heart-felt core. i had my nitpicks with the plot but i still super enjoyed it, really want to read the second part.

a tale of two mommies - vanita oelschlager ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ netgalley book. a cute children’s story about a kid with two moms. <3

crier's war - nina varela ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ more f/f fantasy YA, this one with the added benefit of being about something that i ADORE reading about in fiction: artificial life. in this fantasy world, automae were created, perfected, became aware of their place in society, fought a war for their autonomy... and won. the story opens up 50 years later, in a society ruled by robots, where humans are subjugated. it follows the current robot ruler’s created daughter and a young human rebel whose one goal is to kill said daughter. i loved this SO much, the enemies to lovers trope was peeeerfect. i wish the writing was tighter, and some plot elements could have used cleaning up, but i enjoyed this so much. the ROMANCE especially was... gah! <3 the second book comes out soon, but i want it like, now.

second dad summer - benjamin klas ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ another netgalley book. a fun and charming primary/middle school story about a kid spending the summer with his father, and his father’s new boyfriend, who he doesn’t quite get along with. over the summer he makes new friends, nurtures some plants, learns some lessons. i thought this was well-written, touching, and does a pretty good job of telling kids about queer stuff.

tempting fate - sloane kennedy ⭐️⭐️ contemporary m/m novella (short story honestly) about two ranch hands realising their feelings for one another. it was fine, i read it because i was in the mood for a quick HEA and i got that, but it was also kinda flat and there were several kinda irksome things about it. i reeeeeally don’t like overly possessive characters, lol.

all the reasons i need - jaime clevenger ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ more contemporary f/f romance, this one about long time friends who have been in love for ages, slowly coming to a place where they can finally admit their feelings and try to embark upon a relationship. again, while on vacation! this was a lot more sombre than the previous clevenger book, as it deals with past abuse and eating disorders. but i also found the writing to be better in general, and the relationship between the two women was just... so great. the writing definitely isn’t pulitzer prize-winning or anything, but there are so few good butch/femme books out there, i ate this up, and will def. be reading more from this author.

interpreter of maladies - jhumpa lahiri ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ speaking of pulitzer prize-winning authors... i’ve had this author and this book specifically at the back of my mind since secondary school; one of my literature teachers really loved it and would bring it up all the time. i really enjoyed it! it’s a collection of stories about the indian diaspora in america, as well as life on the subcontinent. i really like her writing (very simple, very precise, but very evocative) and there were a few really striking stories.

and that’s it for april. look at me, actually writing this entry on time, lol. for may i’m just gonna... keep reading whatever catches my eye on scribd i guess. i remember vaguely saying that by this time of the year i would have moved on to reading the books on my physical bookshelf that i haven’t gotten to yet but... i go where the wind takes me etc. currently reading silver moon, about women who turn into werewolves once they hit menopause? absolutely metal.

#book talk #long post

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devnny · 5 years

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CHAPTER TWO.

JTRM — THE “R” STANDS FOR RECOVERING!

PREVIOUSLY.

This is it fellas; the MEAT, the starting point that actually matters. It's all a damn mess hereafter. Devi, babey... forgive me, the Hell begins now! (And Johnny... please fucking behave yourself.)

Dear Diary,

I’m back from vacation.

I have a date FUCK meeting with Devi. Yes, that Devi. Weird, no?

She grew a head-thing too, but she can control it, and she’s going to try and help me do that too… We’ll see how well that works out. She yells a lot… scary.

I haven’t totally given up on my emotional enema idea, though! Just gotta work on my temper. Why does everything have to be so aggravating?

3:00PM:

“I must be out of my fucking mind, Tenna.”

“I thought you just got over being out of your mind.” Tenna replied from the couch, squeaking Spooky as punctuation to her sentence.

“Don’t chastise me.” Devi moaned, loosely draped over her armchair. “Sickness has nothing on Nny.”

She dragged herself into an upright position to continue her complaints.

“AN ART LESSON FOR A MURDEROUS LUNATIC, yeah, innovative idea there, Devi!” She cried to the gods in vain. No gods could save her from the bed she’d made so neatly for herself.

“Maybe he won’t show up?” Tenna tilted her head further off of the couch in an attempt to make eye contact with her forlorn companion. Devi only melted further down her seat.

“That’s my only hope.” She sighed. “But knowing my luck, he’ll show up with a bouquet of severed hands for me. God it was so… weird talking to him again. Besides the topic being about personal insanity and death, it was sorta like old times.”

Tenna sat up to stare at her skeptically.

“Don’t tell me you missed him.”

“NO, no! Nothing as stupid as that.” Devi insisted. “Well, I mean, I did miss the Nny I thought I knew, but that’s kinda “sucks to suck”, seeing as that Nny wasn’t… really him.”

“And what if that was the real him? And you’re going to slowly scrape Mister Nice-guy out of his skull with your bare hands, like some kind of monkey artist-therapist combo?”

“I doubt that even more.”

Devi got up from her chair to scoop up the art tablet that was besmirched with Johnny’s drawing from off of the coffee table. The little stick figure he scribbled down had stayed there, mocking her, since his creator had left in the early morning hours. Johnny had only shared a couple of his “Happy Noodle Boy” comics with her long ago, likely because he was embarrassed about them. He had said he used to paint and sketch very detailed pieces, but as “something” – which she now knew was the “Doughboys” and wall-demon, and whatever else was involved with these brain parasites – overtook him, he lost all ability to create beyond these meager doodles. She couldn’t imagine a more horrid fate for a creative. For herself.

To some degree, she pitied him, but then she would remember he that tried to murder her and felt a lot less pity. Even if she understood now that he was hapless pawn, set forth to do obscene violence in the name of some otherworldly creature, all that said about him was that he was too weak-willed to stubbornly commit to his art the way she had – so could she even help someone like that?

It was irrelevant, she decided, since his new little “voice” wanted to involve her in his scheme to eat the last remaining bits of Johnny’s brain. If she didn’t try and aid him now, he would probably just manifest in a couple of months to try and either murder her or… worse.

She shook her head. Disgusting!

“I don’t have a choice with this Tenna.” Devi grumbled. “Or rather, I guess I do, and I’m choosing to deal with this now, instead of trusting Nny to have any mental wherewithal to fight this off and not turn into a puppet again.”

“That’s very brave of you, Devi. You’re an inspiration.” Tenna joked, wiping a fake tear away. Devi groaned.

“Thanks. Now get out of here, before the creature himself shows up.” She tossed the tablet back onto the table haphazardly. “I know how he acts around me, relatively anyway, but I don’t need extra company throwing him off-balance, and this ends up a double murder.”

“Okayyy, but if things get hairy, give me a code, like, three stomps on the floor, or eerie silence, or something, and I’ll call the cops!” She grinned from the doorway.

“WHAT GOOD WOULD IT DO!?” Devi steamed and slammed the door shut. She still had very bitter feelings about the city’s useless police force – demon intervention or not.

6:01PM:

Johnny sat with his knees up under his chin in the driver’s seat of his car. He pressed his shins against the steering wheel anxiously while he tried to think about what to do. He had gone home and bummed around – the house was still as he’d left it, only dustier, which was to be expected -- until the afternoon, after which he started panicking like the madman he was. What the hell was he supposed to do, actually show up to this thing against his wishes? An ‘art lesson’ with that intimidating woman that he didn’t particularly enjoy being around anymore, mostly because she berated him with scathing honesty now!? Ridiculous!

Yet he was here, parked behind a 24/7, less than a block from her apartments, at the time she requested he come. Curse her, and curse her rightness about all of this. He didn’t want to go.

Hesitantly he moved a hand over and grabbed a small bag of his own art supplies from home. Nothing fancy, but he preferred his own pens for inking comics, as he knew how they performed. Small increments of control was better than none, after all.

Johnny, bag clutched to his chest, exited his vehicle and kicked the door shut. As he walked from the alleyway to the sidewalk that lead to Devi’s building, he questioned all the uncertainties that he was headed directly towards.

The most basic of those worries was his timing for this meeting – arriving early was out of the question, but he had arrived almost exactly on time, which also seemed kind of pathetic. He hated getting caught up in these sort of social dilemmas – but since it involved another person, and one that he kinda-sorta respected in the highest regard, he wanted to make a good impression! What if she was irritated that he was even a minute late? Or what if that made him look totally creepy, and arriving loosely around 6:00PM was more of what she imagined? Stupid social cues!

Amongst his inner-monologuing, he failed to realize how close he was to Devi’s apartment until he was at the steps of the building. He cursed to himself, then treaded up into the lobby and checked the time on the digital wall clock that hung lopsided by the elevators. 6:14PM.

“Shit.” Johnny mumbled again. He didn’t want to hurry if this was supposed to be a casual timeframe, but he didn’t want to doddle either! He decided to take the stairs, but briskly.

FOUR FLOORS UP:

Devi had just started to think that the glimmer of a chance that Johnny wouldn’t show up was plausible, when the door knock came.

“Shit.” She griped from the kitchen. Her chest heaved out a sigh, and she aggressively set down her glass of water on the counter. This was going to be a long night, surely.

A few short strides to the door, and she opened it up to her expected guest. At least he didn’t have a bouquet of human limbs.

“Hi.” Johnny shot her a sideways smile. Devi did her best to hold in any unhappy noises, and tried to force what little optimism she had out from the very bottom of her soul.

“Hey, Nny.” She replied, only a little dryly. Johnny smiled wider at that.

“No bat tonight?” He pointed to her bare right hand. Devi looked down to it, then back at him.

“Don’t tempt me.” She stepped aside and let him in, hoping that the act wasn’t just as good as signing her death certificate. Johnny strolled in much too casually for her liking, but she ignored that, hoping to put off any bursts of maniacal rantings from him as long as she could.

Johnny looked around her apartment, like a normal house guest might, seeing as he was one this time. He inspected a few of her paintings with a thoughtful smile on his face and his hands crossed behind his back, still clutching his pencil bag. Devi’s eyebrow ticked in annoyance.

“I didn’t really get a good look at your apartment last night. It’s nice. Very you.” He hummed.

“Thanks.”

“These are your paintings aren’t they? I like them.”

“Thank you, Nny.” Devi rolled her eyes tiredly. “Can we focus here, a little bit?”

“I’m only trying to be polite! You were so kind to invite me back despite desperately wanting to smash my skull in yesterday.” He smiled at her again, almost arrogant, as though trapping her in small talk was a necessary evil, and if he had to suffer this social outing, so did she. Devi snorted.

“Your immense politeness is noted. Now let’s get on to what you’re here for.” She tilted her chin in his direction as she walked by, leading him further into the living room. She sat with a leg tented up on the floor, and Nny followed, sitting across from her with his feet together.

“I see you came prepared for this. That’s good.” She noted the little bag in his lap, choosing to assume it was art supplies and nothing sinister. Johnny grinned while Devi took up the same drawing pad from the night previous. He eagerly opened the pouch to spill out his pens and pencils onto the table. Devi held in any relief that she was right in her assumption.

“So. You just want me to draw?”

“Yeah.”

“And you really think that’s the key thing here?” Johnny questioned skeptically.

“Sickness always talked about how annoying my work ethic was for her. While she was trying to form, I guess, I was using too much of my brain for painting stuff, so she couldn’t grow right, or quickly, or whatever.”

“I see…” Johnny brought a knuckle up to his mouth. “So it’s not so much using your brain, but using it for creative endeavors? Writing, drawing, thinking?”

“Seems like it.” Devi leaned back on her palms. “And to a further extent, not giving in to the temptation of sitting around and doing nothing. There were times where all day I’d be thinking; “I need to work, I need to work”, but I just sat there on the couch thinking about it, never actually got up and did anything, which is what she wanted. For you, it was probably a little different, seeing as – as far as I know – the only supernatural thing that lived in the apartments besides Sickness was the psychic fat of a morbidly obese woman.”

“…What?”

“Nevermind.” Devi looked around before settling her eyes on the paper again. “Just draw, for like, an hour. I need to get some work done too, so I’ll just sketch concept crap while you do that.”

“What should I draw?” Johnny inquired while he jammed the eraser of his pencil up against his gumline.

“I can’t tell you that, that defeats the purpose.” She sighed. “Just, draw a comic, I don’t know. It doesn’t have to make any fucking sense, just something.”

“HAH!” Johnny laughed. “Well I have good news about my Happy Noodle Boy comics, then.”

He seemed a little more enthused at that and pulled the tablet in his direction, before hunching over the table and skritching away at the paper beneath him. Devi watched him curiously a moment before returning to her art room to retrieve her own sketchbook.

45 MINUTES IN:

Devi looked up from her perch on her armchair at her struggling ‘student’. She’d already watched him wad up and throw three separate sheets of paper around him, and he was looking more unhinged the less his drawings were coming out like he wanted. Johnny stared at his current page with his lips pursed and his eyebrows furrowed tightly. As he lifted a hand up to the spiral of the tablet, Devi interrupted him.

“Ah.” She scolded. “Keep going.”

“But it’s STUPID. It makes no SENSE.” He argued at her from the floor.

“I told you that’s fine. Don’t get frustrated on the details, it’s fine if it looks like crap as long as you finish.”

“IT’S NOT!”

“Nny.” Devi’s eyelids lowered, indicating as ungently as possible that she wasn’t budging on the subject. Johnny responded with collapsing across the table dramatically.

“THIS IS TOO ANNOYING, I WON’T CONTINUE.” He seethed. “I’m going to the 24/7 and getting a Brain-Freezy!!”

“No, you are not. Finish your stupid comic, you only have like, ten minutes until ‘break time’ anyway.”

“YOU CAN’T MAKE ME STAY!” He screamed back, raising up to glare at her with his hands flat on the table. “I’M TIRED of being controlled, this is idiotic!!”

Devi frowned and set her sketchbook aside.

“Don’t be such a baby!” She chided him. “Think of the goal you’re working towards, you moron! Complaining about not being free when working toward freedom? HELLO?”

Johnny kicked his legs out and let himself fall backwards onto the floor, glaring at the ceiling as though it had called him a slew of cusswords. After a few moments of heaving breaths, Devi watched his chest slow to childlike huffing.

“But… I HATE it, Devi. I HATE IT!” Johnny clenched his fists tightly. “I hardly even enjoy drawing these ASININE Noodle Boys anymore!! I want to draw the way I used to, and this just reminds me that I can’t!! Sometimes it’s still fun, but mostly it SUCKS! COMPLETELY SUCKS!”

“Jeezus… don’t look at it like that, Nny.” She sighed. Tenna joked about her being a therapist monkey, but that was barely an exaggeration if this was going to be how things went every encounter. “Look at your scribbles like the first step back to your previous talent, not a continuous path of stagnant shit you have to walk. I swear, Johnny, this is going to help.”

She hoped that she was swearing to something she could actually bolster, especially after Johnny rolled his head over to give her an immensely forlorn expression. After a moment he sighed and sat back up, lamely picking up his pencil to continue drawing. Devi watched him again, a pinch uncomfortable with the sudden seriousness of the mood, and tried to think of something funny to say.

“Well,” She picked up her work again. “I guess if all else fails, you can just die again.”

Anyone else might have thought the comment cruel, but Johnny burst into a fit of muffled hysterics. Devi smiled against herself, but did her best to hide it behind her sketchbook. Johnny’s giggling tapered off as he settled his hand back onto the page he was working on.

“You know,” He began as he started scribbling. “the funniest thing about the whole dying incident… the method was so stupid.”

“I told you about the RadioShack arm and all of that, but the way I rigged it, it shouldn’t have ever worked! It was hooked up to the phone, and would activate when I got a phone call, but wouldn’t actually go off until I picked up the receiver and said “hello” into it. As Psycho-Doughboy so kindly said, it was a load of shit! I never get calls, not even wrong numbers, and especially not at 2 o’clock in the fuck-all morning!”

Devi’s hand stopped moving mid-stroke, her eyes wide. Johnny didn’t notice, and continued speaking while he drew.

“But, out of all the shit luck I’ve had, the phone rings, right then, right when I was screaming with the Doughboys, saying I was calling the whole thing off! Now that I think about it… I don’t know why I didn’t just… not pick it up – BUT, thank fuck I did, right?”

Devi remained silent, her throat suddenly, and increasingly, dry. It couldn’t be, it just could not be. Her mind raced; maybe it was wrong, she was mistaken – but there was no way, it fit too well. All she heard was that fucking “hello”, then a bang – a gunshot. A thud. A scream. If Johnny was still talking now, she couldn’t hear him.

“It was me.” She said suddenly, bringing Johnny out of his thought.

“Huh?”

“…It… was me. It was me, I was the one that called you that night.” Devi’s widened eyes lifted to stare at him as she spoke. “Tenna said… I was just… checking if you still lived there.”

Her mumblings died off as her eyes wandered away from Johnny’s face to bore into the drywall across the room. Johnny blinked, barely processing what she was saying.

“What? You called me that night, Devi?” He wondered only briefly how she could know it was that exact night, but quickly rationalized that he hadn’t received any other phone calls besides that one, before or since. It was Devi. His eyes grew impossibly larger as the reality of it dawned on him.

He stood up, unable to keep still with the sudden surge of energy pulsing throughout his body.

“You, you – YOU called me Devi!” He paced as he handled the information. “You did – oh my God, I can’t believe I never thought of this before!”

Devi’s attention made it’s way back to her now manic guest, and she watched him uncomfortably from her seat. Johnny smiled uneasily, holding his head while he walked.

“The entire reaction, I gave the reaction the credit for removing those shitty horrors from me, but I never thought of the action! The call itself! It wasn’t just the GUNSHOT, it wasn’t just DYING, it was that phone call! MORE IMPORTANTLY, it was the one that placed that phone call!! My God, all this time I’ve been ambling around, a slave free from his shackles, thrust into a world unknown, when the KNOWING was right there!! It was so obvious!”

He stopped his frantic pacing to kneel into a lunge at the foot of Devi’s armchair, startling her further into the fabric of it’s back. Johnny grabbed the corners of her sketchbook, which she was using as a pathetic shield between her frazzled self and the man before her, and he smiled wide with excitement.

“Oh, Devi! Devi it was always YOU – who else would it be!? Who else COULD it be!” Johnny breathed through a laugh. “Devi, you KILLED ME.”

She could only stare at him in silent horror. It wasn’t like she meant to kill him! She did say that she wished he would die for making her like him so much and then letting her down so horrendously but – Christ, it wasn’t meant to be so literal! She didn’t want to be the cause of it! If he wanted to just go vaporize and leave her alone, that’s what she would have preferred back then. Johnny didn’t seem to realize her discomfort on the gruesome truth to his ‘demise’.

“You stripped me of those wretched little monsters – even the WALL-THING!” His smile didn’t waver. “I should have known; there was a reason you escaped! No, a reason I MET you!”

Devi wanted to interrupt before he convinced himself of some soulmates bullshit, but her throat felt clogged, and nothing would come out.

“And here you are, helping me again… Fuck’s sake, I’ve been so foolish! So BLIND!” Johnny’s fingers gripped onto her sketchbook harder, pulling it down so the top was under his chin as he leaned in further. “All this time, it was always you; you made me happy, you escaped, you released me of that Hell!! If fate’s a real thing, THIS is it! How else would I get aligned with the one person, after all of that previous shit, that has the mental fortitude to withstand an attack from those disgusting vermin!?”

“J… Johnny.” Devi managed finally, through her barely functioning jaw. The sound of her voice seemed to reel him in a ways, and he slid back to sit on his heel expectantly, but with a much less wild look in his eyes.

“Oh, I beg you, please don’t be nervous Devi! I don’t hold any resentment for your hand in my death, not at all!” He chuffed. “And I’m so sorry for… for yelling, and being an overall pain in your ass since visiting you. I swear, after this, that’s it! Whatever you say, goes.”

Devi blinked in surprise at that. Was he honestly pledging his loyalty out of sheer gratitude that she inadvertently kind-of murdered him? She could only stare at his eager eyes, unsure of whether to be horribly afraid of this new measure of weirdness in their relationship, or to feel safer in that she was his so-proclaimed Angel of Death.

“Um… uh…” She tried to think of something to say, but was still panicking internally. “Um, y-y’know what, Nny?”

She hated how his head perked up, like he was waiting on her word.

“A uh… a Brain-Freezy sounds good, actually. You wanna go grab us a couple while I… think about what kind of existential bullshit I’m experiencing right now?”

“YUM. Yes, okay! I will!” His smile pulled up on one side, letting his gums peak out, before he ran to the door. He halted abruptly and turned to her again. “Is Cherry Doom okay? That’s the flavor I get.”

“Yeah.” Devi didn’t even think about her answer, and watched him leave with an uncertain, disturbed look in her eyes. She melted unceremoniously against the chair, arms and legs splayed out, and continued to stare at nothing in particular. She didn’t want Johnny to like her so immensely -- she didn’t even want for him to like her much at all! The way this was going, she might be stuck with him as long as his gratitude lasts. How long could the frenzied gratefulness of a homicidal maniac last, exactly?

NEXT.

#devi: it cant last that long right???? right?#jtrm #mine #devnny #now i can write the fun parts #aka: leash #chapter

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aqvarius · 5 years

Note

Fav voltage games and any guys similar to you???

thanks for the ask!

[5] favourite games:

1. Her Love in the Force: because i’m So Predictable. honestly i feel this game is one of the strongest overall. the writing is incredible, the mix of drama and romance and action is perfect, the plots are always so interesting. i sometimes play other games and then kind of put it down before i’m finished with a route but with HLITF, i have to finish the whole route ASAP because i love the feeling of investigating and uncovering the plot in addition to the developing romantic relationship. also all the love interests are really top notch, and you really get to see the mc’s development into an incredible detective. can’t go wrong with this game at all. i recommend it wholeheartedly to everyone.

2. Dreamy Days in West Tokyo: this game makes me feel nostalgic for a high school experience i never even had. this is voltage’s sweetest game of all time (i say that but i actually never played class trip crush or any of the other school life ones lmao). if you love school life shoujo manga and osananajimi romances that you actually get to see develop all the way to marriage, this is the game for you. the reason that it’s one of my faves is that it’s actually surprisingly quite full of drama and anguish as well and i found a lot of the conflict in the relationships really quite relatable. i also love the camaraderie between the whole friend group :)

3. Be My Princess: a true classic. this is one of the first voltage games i ever played. i totally understand why it had to come to an end but how i wish there was more BMP content. give us butler routes voltage you cowards!!!!! BUM is not the same!!!! anyway wow this was back when princesses were the trend for MCs and now i guess everyone is just raring for action MCs. i miss Average Girl MCs - anyone else? i’d love to see more political drama in BMP too… i’m also especially nostalgic for this game because the OG voltage tumblr crew were so much fun

4. Kiss of Revenge: such a good game that i wish they continued. this is when i feel like voltage was peaking with their more mature games and MCs. the only good and valid Dr. MC, RMD MC needs to learn from her. this is another game where i wish there were more content. i love that the MC is the focal point of the drama rather than the love interests. although i do suppose it is a game where the premise only really allows for limited content…

5: A Knight’s Devotion/My Sweet Bodyguard: AKD is just MSB in medieval times. i couldn’t decide between the two because the premise is basically the same and AKD is just the ‘less content’ version of the two. i do still really like the bodyguard/knight falling in love with his mistress trope, and i don’t really mind that the MC is kinda weak physically. people always slag her off for just like panicking when she’s in precarious situations but unless you’re a seasoned fighter, you would panic in real life too, don’t lie. there are different types of strengths and i feel like the AKD/MSB MCs demonstrate the type of tolerance and understanding that really complements their LIs. also i’m forever grateful for MSB for giving us the greatest spinoff app of all time, HLITF.

6. BONUS it’s not an otome game but Voltage released this game 生存率0%! 地下鉄からの脱出 which is a VN horror survival type game? I’ve been wanting it since I saw the trailer in 2013.

[5] guys similar to your personality:

all the tsunderes lol. no but for real

1. Ayumu Shinonome: this is strange because i love him so much as a LI haha. but in actuality, we’re pretty similar. i’m pretty bad at expressing my feelings for people even if i feel them so strongly and i kind of send out hints here and there and expect my SO to get them (and he gets it just enough for me to feel like this a viable form of communication lol). in general i’m the type of person who often does things without explaining myself and internalise everything when i’m annoyed. i did one of those stupid facebook meme generator things about myself and it came up with this which is so accurate i hate it

i’m also the type to put a lot of value on toiletries/cosmetics lol, i’ll spend an hour hovering around the chemist/drugstore and i’ll do SO much research before buying new makeup/skincare/haircare etc. ayumu and i share a motto which is “要靚唔要命” (fashion > comfort/life lmao)

i also take my teaching pretty seriously (although… i would never ever date a student) like literally i’ll have to get up at 7am to teach a 9am seminar and then i’ll still be up at 4am thinking of activities to try to get them to practice applying a certain theory or adjusting the wording of my questions to get them to understand something better. i love peach tea and i used to get it from the vending machine every day when i was in school lmao and i was not gonna reveal this for fear of seeming lame but i’m just gonna admit that i also have a dinosaur phone case hahahaha although i got it just cause it was cute and not cause i’m a dinophile. anyway the big difference between us though is that ayumu is a genius while i am made up of Dumbass Juice

2. Toru Kurosawa: i’m loathe to admit it but i’m also kinda similar to this….. freaking……. guy…….. cause he’s kinda cheerful and sometimes a bit of a chatterbox on the surface but also kinda… two-faced?? which, same. i don’t really take things seriously unless it’s actually a big deal to me and then i’m like SUPER serious about it. also my friends probably all find me super annoying l m a o there was a time in my life where i would spam my close friend circle group chat and everyone would just ignore me

another similarity is that we tend to push people away when we have personal issues to deal with. i always try to sort my own shit out before involving anyone else even if the situation involves them (but this also means that even if something is not my fault i’ll find a way to rationalise that it is my own fault and then accept it as my own problem and the other person will get off scot free)

3. Rihito Hatsune: oh? what’s that? another Bad Personality Guy? i think i’ve toned this down a fair bit from before but i can actually be pretty manipulative with guys and instead of being up front and direct, i’ll just do and say things that will get me the response that i want (lol the recurring theme here is that i’m a terrible person and bad communicator. @ my boyfriend, thank you for putting up with me for 4 years lol). i’m also a classically trained musician (but stopped just short of applying to conservatory for musical performance when i did my uni applications back in the day cause i suck at theory)

4. Mizuki Fujisaki: beyond all my two-facedness, bad interpersonal communication skills and other general negative personality traits, i think mizuki and i are similar in that we share the same airheadedness. like i think we both share a brainwave and that brainwave is only accessible in outer space. in mizuki, it’s cute. in me, it’s… ADHD maybe…??? who knows.

5. Glenn Casiraghi: it’s hard to find 5 different guys who are similar to me lol. i guess i would go with glenn because he has a complex about his age (i too have always been the youngest in my cohort - family, friends, schoolmates, etc. and i have such an inferiority complex about it lol) and he can be kinda spoilt but also pretty responsible when he has to be

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buffster · 7 years

Text

Doomed (BTVS 4.11)

This is part of my ongoing Buffyverse Project, where I write notes/meta for every episode in an attempt to better understand the characters and themes of the shows. You can find the BTVS list here and the ATS list here. Gifs are not mine.

Doomed opens exactly where Hush closed--with Buffy and Riley silently staring at each other. There’s a distinct difference in the question they each have for the other: Buffy wants to know who Riley is while Riley wants to know what Buffy is. It’s already obvious that Riley has a job while Buffy has a calling.

Of course, Buffy already knows much more about the Initiative than Riley knows about the Slayer. She does learn the official name they have for supernatural creatures: HSTs, or Hostile Sub-Terrestrials. Hard to take them seriously with that name.

Buffy: I'm the Slayer. Slay-er. Chosen one? She who hangs out a lot in cemeteries? You're kidding. In every genera--You know, I really don't feel like doing the routine. Ask around. Look it up: Slayer comma The.

Amazing that Buffy’s ran into a group less competent than the Watcher’s Council. Buffy isn’t exactly thrilled Riley isn’t the normal guy she thought he was. After Angel, she’s just not looking for drama. Right now she’s looking for “not Angel” more than she’s looking for “new guy”.

For some reason (the inconvenience of moving him, perhaps?) Spike is continuing to live with Xander. I can see where all the Spander fics launched because they’re definitely arguing pretty bad. I’m assuming Xander’s parents haven't noticed their new house guest or they’d be demanding more rent. Spike is basically useless around the house and Xander demands he step up. Surprisingly, he tries...but ends up shrinking his clothes and having to wear Xander’s. I guess all-powerful vampires don’t have to bother with laundry.

Xander: No. You're not a guest. You're a vampire and you have no soul and I don't get exactly why we're not making you into Spike-on-a-stick.

Spike: Wish you would, if it's gonna be like this.

(breaks something) Property damage I can do.

Xander: That's it! I am way past through with you. Hate to break it to you, Oh, Impotent One, but you're not the"Big Bad" anymore. You're not even the "Kinda Naughty." You're nothing but a waste of space. My space. And as much as I always got a big laugh watching Buffy kick your shiny, white bum, and as much as I know I could give you a little bum-kicking myself now, I'm here to tell you...you're not even worth it.

Buffy has this habit of keeping her problems bottled up post-Angel. I think the confusion of her friends being traumatized from Angelus plus her still having feelings for him caused her to shut down. And honestly she never goes back to the way she was (I’m referencing her not talking to Giles or Willow about Riley being a commando, here).

Buffy: I've so got a reason. Pretty darn good one. The last time we had an earthquake, I died.

Giles: Yes. I know that. And therefore completely understand your anxiety.

Buffy: Oh, good. Hate for my little"untimely, horrible death"concern to be ambiguous.

Now that I’m thinking on it, Buffy’s death was brushed under the rug a bit. Thinking she was going to die had to be horribly traumatizing and probably left scars akin to being a survivor of a brutal attack. But BTVS doesn’t have time for PTSD.

Forrest: Well, the way I got it figured, Slayer's like some kind of Bogeyman for the Sub-Terrestrials. Something they tell their little spawn to get them to eat their vegetables and clean up their slime pits.

I found it a bit weird Riley doesn’t know about the tales of the Slayer while Forrest does. Riley ranks higher than him. Perhaps it’s alluding to his blinders when it comes to what he’s working for? Forrest, on the other hand, has narrowed everything down to black and white thinking: the HSTs are just animals. Riley hasn’t really looked into the Initiative while Forrest has and likes what he’s found just fine. I feel like I’ve seen this mentioned before, but I’m definitely getting Forrest-has-a-crush-on-Riley vibes. He’s super dismissive of Buffy and extremely jealous anytime Riley worries about her over him.

Willow decides to head to a party alone in the hopes that Buffy will eventually show. I hated when Willow overheard Percy mocking her. I really wanted to have some faith in humanity and believe the “jock” saw the “nerd”’s value. Willow ends up crying in some random dorm until she realizes she’s next to a dead body.

Buffy: Wow. See, I was kind of unsure about where the party was. And then I saw the flashing red lights and the ambulance, and it's like... oh, right, of course. Carnage. Death. It's a Buffy party.

After some research the gang and the Initiative realize something big is coming. We get to see that both sides have their advantages: Team Buffy has more knowledge of the occult while Team Initiative has convenient gadgets.

Giles: It’s the end of the world.

Willow: We did this already.

Xander: it is losing its impact a little.

Giles: End of the world. Divisions break down, Hell itself flows into our lives like a sea of fire. Loss,tears and heart-rending pain without end for every human man, woman and child on this earth. Death ten times over. For each of you and everyone you love.

Xander: Hmm. Feeling the impact again.

I love when a television show is able to make fun of itself, so I loved the exchange above. After the world is supposed to end multiple times you stop believing the heroes won’t stop it.

Buffy and Riley run into each other while on patrol and finally have The Talk.

Buffy: Can't... any of it. Can't be with you. It's a mistake, it's a huge black pit of a mistake and I can't go there again.

Riley: Again? You've dated me before?

Buffy: No. But I've been involved with...you don't know what my life is like.

Riley: And I'm dying to find out!

Buffy: Operative word: dying. There's too much risk -- there's too much... It's just doomed, okay, and I can't do doomed again right now.

Riley: I don't understand where this is coming from. I know you like me. And it's not like we don't have anything in common.

Buffy: But it's --

Riley: Buffy. I'm thrown by this. I'm confused. But I can feel my skin humming -- my hands, my... every inch of me. I've never been this excited by a girl and I'm not trying to scare you, not gonna force myself on you but I am by God not gonna walk away because I think it might not work. I don't know what's happened in the past --

Buffy: Death. Pain. Apocalypse -- none of them fun. Do you know what the Hellmouth is? Do they have a fancy term for it, 'cause I went to high school on top of it. For three years. We don't have that much in common. This is a job to you.

Riley: It's not just a job --

Buffy: It's an adventure, great, but for me It's destiny. It's something I can't escape, something I can't change. I'm stuck.

Riley: You don't have to be. You're not in high school anymore. You can change things.

Buffy: Riley... No.

Riley: I know it seems like --

Buffy: My answer is no.

Finding out Riley knows about the supernatural upped the intensity of their relationship in a way Buffy just wasn’t ready for. In the back of her mind I think she imagined slaying would stall and eventually end her relationship with him, which made him safe. She didn’t have to worry about going through something real again. But now that they could really fall for each other she’s running scared.

Xander: Is too. For one thing - that's my shirt you're about to dust. And for another - we've shared a lot here. You should have trusted me enough to do it for you.

Willow: Xander-

Xander: What? He wants to die. I want to help.

Spike attempts suicide (badly). I get they were trying to throw in a comedic moment there, but I don’t know...it feels like Spike hasn’t tried sufficiently hard to get the chip removed to throw in the towel. And I haven’t really seen signs of depression up until this point? I guess it must be difficult to change your lifestyle and not just forcefully take what you want after centuries, though. I’m not going to get into the politics of suicide here because the show kind of toys with what’s okay when it comes to vampires. It’s okay to murder them because they’re just things, so it’s not surprising it’s okay to mock their attempts to kill themselves.

Forrest: I don't know about this girl, man. She's got you whupped something fierce, and you haven't even--

Riley: You'd be wise not to finish that thought, private. Now carry on.

Forrest is gay Forrest is gay Forrest is gay

Riley: You've got this twisted way of looking at things. This -this doom and gloom mentality. You keep thinking like that, things are probably going to turn out just the way you expect.

Buffy: You know, there is nothing more dangerous than a psych grad student.

Riley: Buffy -- where's the bad here? It just turns out we're even more well matched than we thought we were. I mean, you're a--fry cook. And so am I.

Buffy: Right. But you're an amateur... fry cook and I come from a long line of fry cooks who don't live past twenty-five.

Riley: Which is exactly the attitude I'm talking about! I know the risks of what we do. I also know it's more rewarding than any other job on the planet. And fun-

Buffy: Fun? Right. The last person I knew who believed that is in a coma right now because she had so much "fun" on the job.

Riley: I'm not saying you shouldn't take your work seriously-

Buffy: But just turn my frown upside down, is that it? I wish I could - but this isn't the kind of gig where you hang it up at the end of the day and snuggle with your honey.

Riley: But why? Why can't it be?

Buffy: I've tried it, okay? And every time, things fall apart - and I get sucked right back into the uber evil.

Riley: Welcome to the story of the world! Things fall apart, Buffy. Evil - it comes and goes. But the way people manage is, they don't do it alone. They pull each other through. And, sometimes, they even enjoy themselves. If you weren't so self involved, you'd see that!

Buffy: You don't know what you're talking about. You barely know me.

Riley: I know that it's not just the job thing. I'm sure there's some good looking guy that done you wrong in there too but mostly I think you want to stay down in the dark place.'Cause maybe it's safer down there.

I’d like to point out that Buffy has picked up Angel’s habit of trying to run off in the middle of things. Or maybe they were just well matched there. I’m also going to go out on a limb and say at this point Riley hadn’t lost anyone on the job. He says he knows the risks like he doesn’t really know, know what I mean? Doesn’t this make you wonder if Riley was on the other side of this conversation with his future-wife post Buffy?

Spike: I should think you'd be glad to greet the end of days. I mean, neither one of you is making much of a go at it. You. Kids your age are going off to University -- you made it as far as the basement. And Red here. You couldn't even keep dog boy happy. I mean, you can take the loser out of high school-

Willow: I see what you're doing. You're trying to get us to dust you-

Spike: Am not. I just don't want pity from geeks more useless than I am.

Willow: We are not useless! We - we help people. We fight the forces of evil-

Spike: Buffy fights the forces of evil.You're her groupies. She'd do just as well without you. Better, I'dwager - since she wouldn't have to go about saving your hides all the time.

Xander: That is so not true. We're part ofthe team. She needs us.

Spike: Or - you're just the same 10th grade losers you've always been - and she's too much of a softy to cut you loose.

Man, Spike. Cut right to the heart of things why don’t ya? It makes sense we’re finally acknowledging Willow and Xander’s inferiority complex. It’s been in the background for awhile. We see from Spike’s smirk that he doesn’t really mean the things he says; he’s just trying to cause conflict. But he knows exactly how to do it.

I’m a big fan of nostalgia so I loved the scene back in Sunnydale High. I read in the script that we see Amy’s mom there but I missed that. I’ll have to look again. During the fight scene Spike learns he can fight demons, which is a great revelation for him that allows him to take out some aggression and feel strong again. Buffy and Riley team up to save the world.

Riley: Well, hey! Willow. Xander, right? What are the chances, huh? I was just passing by - and I thought I heard people inside-

Willow: You were just passing by...in your GI Joe outfit?

Buffy: No offense - but you are looking wicked conspicuous.

Riley: I am? But it's... paint ball and then the aftershock and I-

Xander: So you're one of the commando guys, huh?

Buffy, your Faith love is showing. Riley doesn’t recognize Spike (which, really? They really do view them as animals).

The episode ends with Buffy and Riley kissing. She’s decided to take the leap.

Character Notes:

Buffy Summers: She is a “Capricorn on the cusp of Aquarius” making her birthday January 19. She labels herself (somewhat sarcastically) as passionate, artistic, and inquisitive. When she patrols she gets bored and memorizes things on masoulems like cereal boxes.

Riley Finn: His code name is “Lilac One”.

Willow Rosenberg: She’s very bothered by Percy calling her a nerd because she thinks she’s distanced herself from that. She was even dating a guitarist.

Xander Harris: When they need to leave Sunnydale High, Xander runs to help Spike out because he’s fallen down.

#doomed #spike #xander harris #Buffy summers #willow rosenburg #anya jenkins #Rupert giles #Marti Noxon #Jane Espenson #David Fury #xander/anya #Riley finn #Buffy/riley #suicide tw #faith lehane #Buffy/Faith #forrest gates

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