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virginbutstillahoe · 4 years

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supernatural: an essay

hello fellow clowns.

i need to get some things off my chest, so here we are. read it, don’t read it, it’s up to you buttercup. love you.

i’ve been watching since i was 11. since 2009. this show raised me.

my father was a really bad guy. i’ve alluded to it a few times on here but, he was a really abusive and horrible man. so, i leaned on this show. it taught me, that even with an abusive father and a difficult hand dealt to me, that i could keep fighting and find the family that i could call my own.

it taught me that family didn’t end in blood. you control your destiny. love is stronger than your crap life. don’t give up, baby.

i am angry about the finale. enraged even. but i still love this show and the actors and crew members that made it possible. that will never change. this show is what pulled me from the ledge more times than i can count. made me laugh when i thought i never could again. did more for me than words can describe to be perfectly honest.

you may say, molly, it’s a stupid show with bad special effects and sometimes bad acting, there’s no way it’s that special to you. and to you i say, i am so sorry for you that you don’t know what it’s like to love and enjoy something with your whole heart.

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now, dean winchester is my favorite character of anything ever. yes, castiel is a CLOSE fucking second, but dean is just god tier for me. he is so human and so much like me. he is the main thing that made me realize, hey, it’s okay to take your time in growing and to be damaged. it’s okay to be flawed. he is everything castiel said in his final moments and more. a true lover. a man who would put his family (blood relatives and non blood relatives) before anyone or anything.

destiel aside. it is OUT OF CHARACTER for dean winchester to not immediately ask for jack to bring cas back as soon as he had all of god’s power. completely. jesus christ he even asked GOD to bring him back.

to continue, dean not asking to see cas as soon as he finds out that he’s not in the empty? you have got to be kidding.

i am a destiheller. i won’t even try to lie here, i am. but seriously, let’s just say for the sake of the argument, that dean isn’t in love with cas. still, dean winchester would have wanted to see his best friend. cas died. dean would have wanted to find him and hug him immediately if he knew he was around.

jesus, didn’t you see him when he found cas in purgatory?

there is literally NO reason that castiel wasn’t present in the finale. zero.

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i am okay with dean dying for the ending. i actually really am. i liked the idea of dean dying to save two children, and doing what he loved. but immediately after they defeat chuck? why? couldn’t he have had a few years of joy? of freedom? why, after everything they’ve been through, did they continue to punish this amazing man, who was nothing but heroic and selfless for the world until the end? i just don’t understand.

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on a more positive side, my sammy. he finally got a long and happy life. albeit without dean but, he still had the chance to enjoy his freedom, and get the apple pie life he always dreamed of.

and dean, oh my dean. his ending? i am angry about how it came about, but a heaven filled with the people he loves? thank you for that. thank you for bobby being there to greet him, for being at harvelle’s and kicking back. thank you.

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sorry to tell you, but i’m back to anger.

misha. goddamn. collins.

this man has done so much good for this show, for its fans, and for honestly the world in general. he came on as as two second plot episode character that they planned to throw away after they used him to connect a couple dots, and his performance was so incredible, they ended up having to throw all their plans away and readjusting.

he made this show good again, he gave it some life. i would watch the show so intensely, hoping to see his face when episodes would air. just his sheer presence in an episode made it more enjoyable.

how did he do that?

what do they give him for his service?

- a death with almost no reaction from the other characters on the show

- a two second mention in the finale without any appearance

- his final words on the show being a prank call from fucking lucifer a long time hated character (and actor) on the show

- and the showrunners using his pull with the fans to trick us into watching an ending where he was nowhere in sight.

you might be saying, wait. what do you mean by that last bullet. well my little cherry blossom, let me explain.

the writers and showrunners KNOW that we love misha and castiel. they know it. as i mentioned before, it was our love of the two of them that kept him on the show in the first place. they know that his presence is what kept the show afloat.

so, they decided to use that to their advantage. they became super mysterious and shifty about his whereabouts during the filming of the finale. why? why would they do that unless they were worried that we would lose interest and find somewhere else to be when the finale aired because our favorite part of the show was gone?

they toyed with us just to ensure that we would maintain the ratings on their last hurrah. and you know what? that really feels like an enormous slap to the face.

because guess what? i would have fucking watched anyway. would i have been upset and a little hurt that cas wasn’t in it? absolutely, for all the reasons i described. but i wouldn’t have been holding my breath in hopes of seeing him the entire time, and then have my heart ripped out of my chest like that in disappointment.

i would have been able to appreciate the ending for what it was, and accept it wasn’t going to be exactly what i wanted ahead of time. i wouldn’t be so angry now.

and i resent them for making me feel that way. this show did so much for me and is so much of the reason why i’m still here today, and they ruined it for me. i am so angry that they took something so precious to me, and crushed it, just to get those extra bucks in from keeping the ratings in a good spot. fuck you.

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during that whole montage of sam growing old and having a family (which i literally honestly loved, alright?) instead of having dean drive the car, which we’ve seen him do 384729387423 times, we could have seen dean reuniting with his mom, with charlie, fuck WITH CAS, and giving jack a nougie. things that actually made sense, and made the most of the finite time we had left.

i didn’t even need a love confession. even just a hug, or an appearance from cas would have been enough for me. because i know, romantic love or not (even though we all fucking know it’s romantic but since so many homophobic people watch the show we have to keep it dubious ugh), cas would be a part of dean’s heaven because cas is part of dean’s family, which is what gets dean out of bed every morning.

----

listen, i am happy that the final minutes of the show were just sam and dean, hugging, and loving each other. after all, that’s what started it all, right? i’m just saying, they screwed us, the characters, and the legacy of the show for what seems to be no apparent reason. it was just laziness, homophobia, or something else that doesn’t make any sense to me.

what was the point of the deancas relationship arc for there to be no resolution? what was the point of brining eileen into sam’s life for them not to be together?

i truly, just don’t understand. i don’t.

they really could have made this something amazing, and jaw dropping, but they chose not to. and i will never forgive them.

----

all that being said though, thank you supernatural. thank you for making me who i am today. thank you for making me laugh, cry, and survive so long. there are memories, people, and messages that you sent to me that will stay with me forever, and that i will never forget.

to the actors, i hope you know, that any anger you might see from me, or from most of us (don’t want to speak for everyone), are at the writers, not you. i see all of your hard work and your devotion. you are everything that makes this show great. you are what made this show. thank you for everything.

and to jensen specifically, i am truly sorry. i really thought you were being an ass and that you didn’t like the ending bc of stupid reasons, but it turns out you were right. i’m sorry they didn’t listen to you, and i’m sorry that i doubted you. you’ve done nothing but love this character and give it your all, and you and misha really got shot in the foot.

your hard work did not go unnoticed.

thank you for listening if you did.

i love you all and it has truly been a pleasure.

i’m gonna tag a few people under the bar in case they’re curious about my thoughts. i might not really talk to a lot of you but i really respect your opinions and like you guys. so yeah (:

tag list @prayedtoyou @destiel-is-canon-i-guess @starrynightdeancas @green-eyes-and-classic-rock @thetiredstuff

#spn #supernatural #my post #my thoughts #destiel #dean winchester #sam winchester #jensen ackles #jared padalecki #misha collins #castiel #spn finale #spn spoilers #plz feel free to leave comments bc i like hearing others' opinions but plz stay civil if you do #it's been one hell of a ride

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lolbtsaus · 6 years

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An Introduction to Kim Namjoon

And now it is time for the wonderful Kim Namjoon aka RM aka joon bug

This post is for any new Armys out there but it’s also for people who have been around for a while, it’s an appreciation post meets an introduction post

I have quite a few appreciation posts dedicated to Namjoon, too many to link tbh but here is my official Namjoon appreciation post

Also if I miss out on something you love about him or a moment of his that you love, feel free to reply to this post with whatever you wanna add or reblog this and leave it as a comment on there, I’d love to read your guys’ personal favorite moments or qualities about Namjoon, these are just gonna be my personal favorites or things that have stuck out to me

So, an introduction to Namjoon

His full name is Kim Namjoon and his stage name is RM

His birthday is September 12th and he was born in ‘94, making him 23 internationally and I think 25 in S. Korea

I don’t really do astrology but I believe he is a Virgo, if that means anything

He is the fourth oldest member and he is a part of the ‘94 line with Hoseok

He is one of the three official rappers in BTS

I would describe joon’s rapping style as powerful

He’s got this deep ass voice and it just it’s so nice hearing him rap tbh he’s just got a s h i t ton of power in his voice when he wants to

He can also be really soft when he sings and that’s also a really amazing thing to listen to, would absolutely recommend

He and kook have done a couple songs together, they’ve done a cover of Fools by Troye Sivan, they’ve done a song called I Know, joon has also done a song with Tae called 4 O’clock, which is r e a l ly fucking good

He has also done a solo mixtape called RM

He’s released quite a few singles, some of which were from the mixtape and some weren’t

He’s released a song with Wale called Change and the lyrics in it are really fucking amazing (the video can be found on bighit’s channel)

He’s released Do You, Awakening, Joke (these can all be found on the BangtanTV channel)

He’s also been featured in a song by MFBTY called BuckuBucku, which he’s performed live with them (if you havent seen him perform it, plz go watch it bc bts were so excited in the audience and kept looking around for namjoon and got so hyped when he came out)

But his mixtape is really re a l ly good and underrated in my opinion

Namjoon is the leader of BTS and he’s a damn good one at that

You really see just why he’s the leader in American interviews

He’s amazing at encouraging the other boys to speak up during the interviews but he also knows when to step in and take over

He knows when to joke around in interviews and when to be serious about things like the album/songs and what they mean to him and the group

There’s this c la s s i c moment where it’s like a hidden camera situation and I think it’s BangPD who asks him if he’d prefer going solo or staying with BTS and without a m o m e n t of hesitation not even a second, he responds with BTS

That moment still gives me chills tbh

Now for some things joon is known for in the fandom

English

Namjoon learned English fluently by watching Friends a bunch of times

He is the only member that is considered to be fluent however the other boys are improving every time we hear them speak English so that may change v e r y soon

Intelligence

Joon has a really high IQ and he’s shown his intelligence in so many different ways

He’s obviously been able to teach himself English, which is already so fucking impressive

He’s so smart when he talks in interviews too?? like i saw this one comment that pointed out that joon’s never afraid to admit he doesn’t know what something means and that he always asks to find out

Like when someone asked him about being a heartthrob and he didn’t know what the word meant, he had z e ro hesitation to ask on the spot and find out new information and I think that’s really cool and important to note bc he’s not afraid to say hey i dont know what that is, mind explaining??

What I love about joon is that he doesn’t try too hard to come off as smart or try to boast about being smart, he embraces the fact that he’s smart and uses it to his advantage but he never rubs it anyone’s face

He’s got a really good balance of showing his intelligence and being proud of it while still being humble about it

Producing

Namjoon is another one of the main producers/composers/writers of BTS, he’s worked a l o t on their albums, there was one album I don’t remember which one but he’d literally had a part in creating almost every single song

He’s written s o many different songs for BTS

Namjoon also has started this thing where every time BTS release an album, he does a VLive and will talk about the album and sometimes, like last time, he’ll released snippets of another version of the song

So, in the last album related VLive he did, he showed what Fake Love was originally gonna sound like and that sort of insight is just honestly amazing

Dancing

Namjoon is one of the members that was not originally a dancer

With every era, his dancing just continues to get better and better and seeing his improvement is honestly so amazing

Clumsiness

Namjoon used to be referred to as the God of Destruction, I don’t see it being used as often as it used to b u t he is known for being pretty clumsy

He once almost fell over while sitting down

He’s not 100% clumsy though bc he’s actually really good at ice skating!!

A LOVE FOR CRABS

Literally just posted a video of him saying hi to a crab and is forever trying to hold them and just chill with them when he sees them he l o v es crabs and I think that’s really fucking adorable

Fashion

Joon bug has a whole OOTD series called KimDaily, which can be found on the official BTS twitter

They’re rea ll y really cute and the outfits are always just s o him like he really expresses himself in his fashion choices and I think that’s really fucking cool

Namjoon has never shied away from trying new looks, he’s worn lace and skirts and corsets and looked amazing in all of them btw

SpeAKin G of looking amazing, here are some of my favorite Namjoon looks (in no particular order)

First look is probably his purple hair

This look is from the Not Today/Spring Day era

And my god was it was a look

I loved the styling of his hair and I loved the color and the way it looked on him and I love him and I loved this look and this era

JUST LOOK AT HIM

Second look is thIS LOOK

Idk what era to put it in bc it’s technically in the Fake Love era but it’s a really recent color and is after their promotions for iT bUT

I love it okay

I can’t tell completely if it’s light brown or blonde I think it’s a really dark blonde judging from the twitter pic but on stage it looked like it could be either but i LIKE IT

Third look is this shit

Now listen I love me some namjoon but i’m gonna need him to relax with this whole look

I loved his hair during this era in general buT THIS SHIT MHM MHM THIS WAS SOME GOOD SHIT

The jacket the shirt the hair the all of it i was ready to fight someone

This is from the DNA/Mic Drop era which btw, just gonna add this gif here bc I think it’s needed to further prove my point of this being a good ass hair era

POINT P R O V E N

But that wraps up my introduction to Namjoon, make sure to give him some love and appreciation bc he is a very important member of BTS (as all of them are) and deserves to be given the same love and support as the rest of the members

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