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ladychiffa · 4 months

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Overprotected

Chitose Fujinomiya’s thoughts || Chitose/Eiji || Chitose/Ichiban || Infinite Wealth spoilers

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“Chitose, darling! How are you doing?”

“Fine, mom.”

“Oh, dear, why is it always ‘fine’ with you? Tell me what’s going on, how’s your day been so far…”

“It’s been… fine, mom.”

It hadn’t. The last couple of weeks had been the worst in Chitose Fujinomiya’s life. And the one she had been blaming for this was herself.

“Well, darling, you see,” mom said, and Chitose got the sense that the woman was uncomfortable even talking about this to her daughter. “I’ve been contacted by the dean’s office a few hours ago. They say you haven’t been attending your classes recently. They tried to reach out to you but had no luck. Are you okay, sweetheart? Is there any trouble?”

“No, I’ve just… I’ve been quite sick recently. Decided it was better to stay at home and focus on healing…”

“Oh, gosh! You should definitely see a doctor!..”

“It’s okay, mom. It’s just a bad, bad flu. I’m fine, just need a couple more days.”

Mom’s voice subdued at the end of the line.

“Well, if you say so…”

Chitose was lying. Physically, she was rather fine. However, ever since meeting Ichiban Kasuga, she started viewing the last three years of her life as a fever dream.

It all started with a simple DM. “Hey, Tatara! I've been a huge fan of yours ever since that exposé of the Fujinomiya business. Can we chat?” How easy it would have been to say no! “Do not chat with strangers on the internet,” her mom always said. But Chitose felt lonely. Upset. Invisible to her own family. So she tapped “Respond.” And only now did she realize this had been the biggest mistake of her life.

“Chitose, darling… You can talk to me. You know this, right?”

No, she couldn’t. She had made this mistake enough times in her life to know the true meaning of these words. If she were to let anyone in her family in on the truth, it would backfire instantly. No pocket money, no freedom to move around the city, no sympathy whatsoever. And a ton of accusations. “You’re a grown-up woman, you shouldn’t trust some stranger you barely know!” Yeah, she already knew this pretty damn well.

“Yes, mom… I’ve gotta go. I’ll call you later…”

“You’ve gotta go where?” Mom's voice got louder. “You’re sick, where are you heading?”

“To bed, mom, to bed,” said Chitose rubbing her forehead as her brain felt like splitting in half. “Bye.”

“Hope to see you soon, darling,” a confused voice said from the speaker of a trendy smartphone.

Chitose swiftly pressed the red icon and lowered the hand on top of her knees. She wouldn’t want to see her mom. She wouldn’t want to see anybody.

It was starting out too well. Chitchats after every stream. Praises, and flattery, and all the gaudy understanding a twenty-three-year-old girl may want. In no time, she found herself shivering at every DM beep. Day after day, all she’d been looking forward to was crawling under her blanket and reading what her mysterious follower had to say.

His profile barely had anything. There was a nickname, an edgy picture, and the interest: drama and exposé videos. That was it. Soon Chitose found herself lacking the means to feed her imagination. So she turned to the internet. She entered the nickname into a search engine and dove deep into the abyss of useless info. On page six, she found an account on another social media website. It had the same nickname and profile picture. But that wasn't all. There was also the age (twenty-nine at the time) and more old profile pics. Scrolling through them one after the other, Chitose found one that caught her eye. A dark room, a window lit by the streetlights outside, and a grim silhouette of a man standing sideways. The most striking was that, unlike all the other profile images, this one looked less quality, as if not appropriated from the net but taken on someone’s cheap smartphone.

Can one fall in love with a single grim profile picture? Chitose didn’t know. If only she had a friend to ask! But she was all alone, staring at a dim silhouette of a man on the little phone screen night after night. And it did feel like falling. As if she had lost her footing and was crashing down with no landing in sight. And then… then she got the message.

“Shall we meet?”

Her palms got sweaty in an instant. Her mind, confused between the images of a gleeful meetup and the scolding she’d get for going out without permission, was in a state of utter shock. Without even realizing what she was doing, Chitose typed, “Yes.”

She remembered entering the café they chose together. There were five tables, and all of them were occupied by different men. But for Chitose one glance was enough to send shivers down her spine. She knew it was him. It was the same old silhouette she was used to seeing on her screen. Disheveled hair, an oversized T-shirt, scruffy stubble and a cheeky smile on his handsome face. Barely feeling her toes, Chitose made a few steps towards the table. And was met with a blank stare of these deep brown eyes.

”Can I help you?” the man of her dreams asked quietly.

“Yeah…” she uttered in confusion. “I’m… Tatara Hisoka. We’ve agreed to meet here…”

She noticed a spark of curiosity in his eyes. He scanned her appearance in one thorough gaze, skimming her look from the short black hair to the sweatshirt and baggy jeans, vaguely smiled, and said to her face:

”I didn't expect you being this… It’s nice finally meeting you, Tatara-chan!”

Only recently had she remembered this first phrase. For years, she had been suppressing this moment in her memory. Trying to forget she was never what he wanted. And almost succeeding.

He introduced himself almost instantly. Eiji Mitamura. In person, he had no intention to hide his face or his name. This was what got her hooked on. For the first time, she had someone totally honest with her. And she felt that she could be honest with him. What a mistake…

It became their secret. Meetings in tiny cafés. Them sharing channel design and content ideas. Innocent chat at first, it swiftly turned into actual videos. Chitose was grateful for Eiji’s input. His ideas were bringing in hundreds and thousands of viewers. Numbers she couldn’t even dream of just recently. And, naturally, she was too excited to notice what actually mattered.

Eiji liked it hot. The new character design he brought for Tatara was a lot more revealing than her original drawings. He always had a quip on Chitose’s looks. Her hair being short was too boyish, her sweatshirts being huge were too ugly, her coy attitude wasn’t steamy enough. She was never enough. And that was what changed her.

She was used to thinking it was for the good. She was becoming a better person. Less repressed, more open-minded. Thinking critically. Turning into a woman she would admire. A strong one, the one to never be manipulated, never be pushed over by anyone, including her family. Funny… Isn’t this exactly who she became to him? Just a pushover, a puppet he would ventriloquize from?

But she didn’t notice. She was in love. With the dim image on the avatar, with the silhouette at the café table, with the quiet laughter and loud anger. And she hid it as well as she could. Meaning… it was painfully obvious. Her trying to seize his attention. Her grasping at straws to make him like her. For months, she would be giving herself up, little by little, thinking that she was being smart, and strategic, and doing everything to win him over. Little did she realize: it was his plan all along. To tease her, to make her betray herself, to make her easy to string along. And that first kiss in the dark alleyway at midnight… it wasn’t her winning. It was him accepting her as his voluntary slave.

It had always been bittersweet. Those sacred kisses no one would see. Those careless words that would make her shiver. That night she called her mom lying that she was staying for a sleepover at a friend’s house while half-naked on the floor in Eiji’s apartment with him running his fingers down her chest. It felt off, but she couldn’t put her finger on why. So she decided to focus on what felt sweet and ignore the bitter.

Chitose didn’t expect what would come next. One day, she spent almost eight hours DMing Eiji with no response. On the verge of tears, she finally saw a new message: “I’m sorry, baby, I’m in Hawaii. Don’t know when I’ll be back. Don’t miss me too much!” Soon, she realized that she did. She could almost sense his absence. The emptiness where he used to be. Chitose was quite used to her life feeling empty. But for the first time, no amount of online videos was able to cover it.

Eiji would fly in and out of Japan every now and then, leaving Chitose feeling like she herself was switching between two different countries: one with him in it and one without. And, little by little, the second one started to consume the other. Even when Eiji was in town, he had no time to see her. No time for chatting. No time to answer her DMs. No time to even open them sometimes. Chitose tried asking her mom of what this might even mean, but the suspicion in her eyes made Chitose stop questioning. She didn’t want mom to find out. Or, maybe, she didn’t want to know how deeply off these relationships actually were.

Chitose never cared much for her studies, to be honest. There was never a purpose to it. Just… having a degree would be nice for a promising young lady. She was attending classes and passing exams in order to simply be busy. Only when Eiji once again left for Hawaii she found a motive to get better at studying. No, it wasn’t an unexpected urge for knowledge. It was an exchange program she found in one of the many leaflets passed around the campus.

How proud of herself she was when she got accepted! It was as if all the hard work she put into it was paying off. Chitose imagined herself arriving at the Honolulu airport, calling Eiji’s number…

He didn’t pick up. Didn’t read her message. Utterly confused, she arrived at her dorm with other exchange students. She didn’t feel victorious. It was as if the finish line she was running towards and almost reached was getting further and further away.

Chitose raised her head, put the phone on the nightstand, and went to the bathroom. A tiny room with a shower, a toilet, a sink and a mirror above it. It was the latter that caught her attention. Or was it the image of a confused girl reflected there?

A glance in the mirror reminded Chitose of how she started to realize how wrong this whole thing was. She was standing right there with a phone pressed to her ear, listening to Eiji’s voice begging her to fetch something from the house of some old lady. “Please, I have no time to explain, just do what I’m asking you.” It was off. Eiji never needed her help. He was never asking her for anything. Especially anything illegal. And this venture seemed totally against the law. But the suspicion wasn’t enough for Chitose to refuse. She nodded, put the phone down, and ran off looking for a taxi.

Everything was going fine. She sneaked into the house, started flipping through stuff, trying to find anything that resembled the necklace Eiji described… and then she heard a door knock. There was someone outside. Someone out there to catch her. Panic went up Chitose’s throat. She couldn’t even breathe. She knew – now she was going to jail. What a fitting end to her stupidity…

She had to calm down. She forced herself to inhale, slowly filling her lungs with air. Then, she briefly exhaled and ran downstairs. Whoever was there, she was going to find her way out of this. After all, she was actually smart. And witty. And quite hot, if this comes in handy.

When she entered the hallway, she almost froze in fear. The uninvited guest… she recalled his image immediately. A yakuza. A former yakuza, to be completely frank. But still… When Eiji brought her that expose, she wasn’t actually betting on it doing well. But the video went viral in just a couple of hours. Chitose was over the moon when she saw the viewer count. She never expected the man in question to show up on her doorstep. Well, it wasn’t her doorstep, but nevertheless… It took her courage to smile at him, and nod, and keep talking as if everything was normal. Inside, Chitose was full of fear and panic.

When the man went to the bathroom, she instantly grabbed her phone and called the number on the speed dial. A familiar voice responded:

“How’s it going? Have you found it?”

“No!” Chitose whispered hastily. “I don’t know what happened… That yakuza from the video last month – he’s here somehow! I don’t know what to do!..”

“It’s okay,” Eiji didn’t sound troubled at all. “Do something to him. You’re good at martial arts, aren’t you? Just knock him out!”

“This musclehead?” Chitose’s eyes went wide. “There’s no way, he’s… huge!”

“Oh, come on!” The man was clearly annoyed. “Check the kitchen out. The old hag must have sleeping pills somewhere. Just drug him! And then drop him off somewhere…”

“Eiji… can’t you just come and help me? I don’t know how I would drug him…”

“I can’t,” he sounded dead-set on this. “Too busy.”

“Eiji, please!” Chitose started begging. “I‘ve never wanted this! Please, you have to help me!”

“Fine,” said Eiji reluctantly. “I’ll be there in two hours. Knock him out.”

“Eiji…”

But he had already hung up. Chitose sighed in frustration and ran to the kitchen.

Drugging Ichiban was much easier than she expected. He had no suspicion whatsoever. On the opposite: he was very open, and lively, and funny… It took strength for Chitose to not get charmed instantly. And, when he finally collapsed from all the pills and alcohol, she could rest easy and think.

This felt off. Digging through stuff in some else’s house. Lying her way out of being discovered doing this. Feeding sleeping pills to a stranger. She never wanted any part in this. Her only hope was Eiji arriving in time. So when the front door screeched again, Chitose ran to it as if her life depended on it.

“Is he unconscious?”

“Yes…”

“Good.”

Eiji didn’t seem okay. He could barely move his feet, pressing his shoulder against the wall and slowly making one step at a time. Chitose’s heart went out to him. If only she knew he was so unwell, she wouldn’t have called him.

“I’m sorry I made you come all the way here. Are you alright? Is there anything…”

“I’m fine,” responded Eiji with annoyance. “Where is he? We need to get rid of the guy.”

“He’s… in the backyard…”

Swearing through his teeth and stumbling, Eiji headed across the room. Chitose followed him, trying to decide if she could offer him her shoulder to lean on. The man was coping pretty well. It even seemed that every next step was getting less shaky than the previous one.

Eiji left the house and approached the guy lying face down on the porch. Barely maintaining the balance, he kicked the man on the ribs. The ex-yakuza was unresponsive.

“You fucking moron,” she heard Eiji’s voice. “Your rush to get here just ruined everything for me.”

“What do we do now?” Chitose asked nervously.

“Help me over here…”

Eiji sat down and tried to lift Ichiban from the floor. But the guy was way too big for him to handle, especially considering the tremble in Eiji’s legs. Chitose dashed towards him and grabbed Ichiban under the other shoulder. Together, they managed to lift the man from the ground. Still swaying, Eiji made a couple of steps towards the ocean…

“Where are we taking him?” Chitose asked, hoping her partner had a plan.

“We’ll drop him into the water,” Eiji replied, barely standing. “In this state, we won’t even wake up before his lungs fill up…”

Chitose froze at her spot. No way. Yeah, this Ichiban was a yakuza with a terrifyingly huge build, he was a dangerous man to be around. But just the few minutes they spent together were enough for Chitose to truly believe: he hadn’t deserved such a cruel fate.

“What’s wrong, Chitose?” Eiji turned his head and graced her with an annoyed glance.

“I can’t,” she said, unable to make a single step towards the water.

Eiji turned his body towards her, almost dropping Ichiban back to the ground. His angry stare made Chitose wish she had never picked up her phone that day.

“And what’s your suggestion, Miss Help-me-Eiji-I-don’t-know-what-to-do?”

Indeed. Wasn’t it her who begged for him to come and solve this? Now things were different. She wasn’t ready for every solution Eiji could come up with. So she had to make her own choice.

In the end, she actually convinced him to help her undress the man and drop him out on a public beach, hoping for him to get arrested and sent to jail. It took Eiji quite some time to consider this alternative, but he agreed, finding it much more promising.

“This idiot is lucky. If we keep an eye on him, we may even find what we’re looking for.”

Chitose was happy to agree. She never wanted blood on her hands. Especially the blood of a relatively nice guy who had done nothing to hurt her.

This was almost two weeks ago. It was then that she started to get the sense that something was wrong. And now… she knew exactly what.

But back then, she didn’t have all the intel. She only had what Eiji was willing to share. For the first time in their relationship, he seemed to be truly interested in her help. His instructions to Chitose were extremely hard to follow. She had to infiltrate Barracudas’ main office and get as much info on this Akane lady as possible. At first, Chitose thought that he was joking. It wasn’t an easy fit to sneak into a place guarded by one of the most fearsome mafia groups on the island. But when Eiji leaned towards her from the driver’s seat of his car and graced her cheek with his warm breath, Chitose felt her knees trembling.

“Please, Tatara-chan. Be a nice girl for me.”

A single kiss on the cheek sealed the deal. Now she was ready to die just to get a speck of his approval. Stupid, stupid girl… At least now she understood this.

She made it. She actually got into the heart of Barracudas’ operations. She would never share with anyone what she had to go through. There was no minute she felt safe. Not with Barracuda officers, not with Dwight, not even alone in the room he gave her. Scooping through the headquarters, she was finding more information about the situation with Akane. But nothing she saw there was as surprising as the appearance of Ichiban Kasuga.

His personality deeply shook her. At first, she naturally expected him to get furious, to harm her or let his two buddies do it for him. But he was… calm. Good-willing. Even stopped this Tomizawa guy from getting at her with his nosy questions. He offered his help in getting out, with just a simple expectation of guiding them through the building. Chitose had every doubt in his sincerity at first. But soon… soon she saw something she couldn’t forget or ignore. She saw the real Kasuga.

He was kind to everyone. Generous. He always tried to understand, not judge. It was as if, for him, there were no bad people in the world – there were just those he wasn’t on the same page with yet. This criminal named Ichiban Kasuga was everything the good guy Eiji never was. For her or for anyone.

Chitose fell hard. Once again, she found herself in love with her own perceived image of a human. But this time, this image wasn’t an avatar, it was real. A real, breathing human being she barely knew anything about. Every flaw she saw in him was turning into a hidden gem. He wasn’t stupid, he was honest. He wasn’t immature, he was energetic. The height and build she once found terrifying were now the reasons she found it hard to fall asleep at night. Just a thought of these big, strong arms holding her tight and pressing closer to this sculpted chest was enough for Chitose to elicit a barely audible moan. “Chi-chan,” said his imaginary voice in her head. No one ever called her that. It was weird at first, but soon she couldn’t get enough.

She felt that she needed to calm herself down. A relationship between an heiress of a wealthy family and an ex-yakuza was destined to head nowhere. With Eiji there was at least an illusion of a happily ever-after. With Ichiban there was nothing. He was old enough to be her dad, for god’s sake! Chitose had heard of the term “daddy issues” before, but only after watching Ichiban dive headlong into the ocean waves was she ready to admit she had some of her own.

Ichiban gave her everything she would never get from Eiji. Honesty. Acceptance. Approval. Sympathy. Wisdom, if one could call it this way. And what did she give him in return? Chitose sighed, looking pitifully at her image in the mirror.

Happiness just couldn’t last forever. Chitose realized this when she looked at the video platform profile she created for the clip of Ichiban. There were views, and likes, and comments. And a DM. Just one DM with a familiar avatar.

“Missed me much, Chitose?”

Of course, it was Eiji. He had been keeping an eye on them and now decided to join in. A humble smile, a clean look, a wheelchair… He looked so different from what Chitose was used to. But the core was the same. And she started seeing it as clear as day.

This was the moment Chitose finally realized what she’d lost because of Eiji. He gave her confidence, just to take it back whenever he needed to. He gave her strength, but only for it to be used in his interest. But what he’d taken altogether was the innocence and the faith in humankind. He even took Tatara, her alter-ego, and made it his puppet. She didn’t know this world was so cruel until she met Eiji. And she might have never known without him. But now it was too late to change a thing.

She betrayed Kasuga. She should have exposed Eiji from the very beginning, but she just couldn’t bring herself to do it. Recalling the list of consequences he promised her for treason, Chitose felt trapped. Her heart was ripping in half every second she was in the same room with Eiji. And when she finally shook the feeling off, it was too late to make things right.

“Ei-chan…” Kasuga said, looking at Eiji in confusion. In an instant, Chitose found herself barely seeing anything through a thick layer of tears.

Ei-chan… Even when the man betrayed him, putting his mother in danger, Kasuga couldn’t bring himself to hate the bastard. He looked confused, not saddened or furious. And for Chitose this was the last straw.

She would never be able to look Ichiban Kasuga in the eye. Knowing what she did to him. Again, and again, and again… She felt like the worst kind of person ever existing. A traitor to everything she believed to be good and admirable. A foolish girl played by someone bigger and better at the game. So, so much better…

Chitose lowered her gaze, so hard it was to keep staring at what she’d become. She used to be so different from this version of herself. She valued honesty over the facade, comfort over looks. She used to wear clothes because she liked them and not because they made her waist look unrealistically thin. She used to be so comfortable with short hair instead of these annoying braids…

The last thought truly caught her attention. She remembered that first meeting with Eiji, that first look of his, and those first words:

”I didn't expect you being this…”

Now she knew what they meant. These were the words that made her change herself. Her image, her life, everything around her. Including these long braided strands, she couldn’t keep her eyes off.

Chitose’s fingers combed through her hair almost intuitively. A second – and she dug the very tips into the intricate braiding on the side. She freed her hair and combed through it once again. And then her hand reached out to the scissors on the shelf. Strand after strand, the long pitch-black hair started falling into the sink, taking away the persona Eiji had been imposing over her own for so long…

When Chitose was done, the girl in the mirror truly seemed like a different person. A grown-up woman, but with a soft flair of the innocence she used to possess. Her eyes were glistening with tears of grief and happiness. She was finally free. Her mind was free of the ideas Eiji had installed. Her image in the mirror was free from his influence. It was Chitose’s turn, and she would be the one to show: she was no longer afraid of Eiji. That time was gone. Now she was stronger and wiser. And not for Eiji’s benefit.

“I’m sorry, mom,” Chitose said out loud. “I will tell you everything one day. But let me have just one more chance to become myself. I will be wiser this time. I promise.”

#yakuza #like a dragon #infinite wealth #chitose fujinomiya #Fujinomiya Chitose #eiji mitamura #mitamura eiji #ichiban kasuga #kasuga ichiban #angst #unhealthy relationships #drabble #fan fiction #infinite wealth spoilers

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reorientation · 2 months

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cockwarming lesbo anon here

last night i got rlly slutty in my lingerie and i got sooo many comments from guys i sent pics to telling me how feminine and breedable i look, one of them basically told me he was gna put me in his spankbank lol

i get why sluts post themselves OF for money and go around doing anything for male attention tbh, i made my venmo public in my bio with a little picture but my blog is rlly small and i’ve never done anything close to sw before lol

(Previously)

It's so funny how easily "lesbians" get addicted to male attention - I got an ask recently from another lesbian who instantly got hooked on slutting herself out for strange men online. You know that even most straight girls aren't that hungry for it, right? Maybe it's just the pent-up craving from years without getting what you needed.

Go ahead and try out being a cheap whore, though. The way this works in person is that a man is nice to you for five minutes and buys you one shot and you spread your legs for him; you can practice by being a sex object for any man willing to spend five bucks on you.

#kink interactions #reorientation writing #reor: anon ask #lgetsd #dykebreaking #reor: cockwarming lesbian

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hageny · 1 year

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Succession Thoughts: Gerri x Roman.

1. Photographs.

The premiere of Season 4 gave us some great content, although none of it focused on Roman and Gerri’s faltering relationship (yet). Sadly, this leaves me with not much material to work with for my first Succession Thoughts post in over a year, but there are a few things we can touch on. Most pointedly, the remark Logan makes to Gerri about whether she’s received anything interesting lately. Clearly, Logan is riffing with her, making reference to last season when Roman sent her the infamous ‘dick pics’. Gerri replies with the above remark, and we get a sense from the brief glimpses of her here that something has shifted. There’s a sense of restlessness, of dissatisfaction. Once CEO and apple of Roman’s eye, now Gerri sits alone in the corner, her relationships with her cohorts--Karl and Frank--likely permanently changed after her stint as CEO. Her relationship with Roman no longer really exists after she assisted Logan in the betrayal of his children last season. Her oft-repeated remark to him--”How does it serve my interests?”--seems ironic now considering how things have shifted for her. One might begin to wonder whether it really served Gerri’s interests to do to him what she did. J. Smith-Cameron stated this in recent interview with Vogue: “[...] But I think she got genuinely attached to him and attached the idea of cultivating a business association with him. So I was sort of surprised, when the writing was a little cold-blooded. She was able to shut herself down more than I would be able to.” This hints at what is to come for them, and struck me as interesting, because, Gerri has really always been cold-blooded. I’ve touched on this point numerous times throughout my time writing these posts, and it’s strange to me that she would not see this quality in Gerri when it has existed all along. Gerri has consistently looked out for herself throughout the series, and likely for years beforehand as well. It’s a quality her husband--one of Logan’s closest associates--likely shared as well. What will be interesting for us as viewers is to see how things evolve over the course of the series between her and Roman. Will her essential nature ultimately be her own undoing?

2. Don’t Wanna Fuck Anyone.

One of the most exciting things this episode delivered was a glimpse at a much smarter, more mature Roman. Between the line above and his line about ‘half a bil’ later on in the show, we see Roman as we’ve not really seen him before. He’s sharp, clearly having paid attention not only to Gerri’s tutelage but also in management training. He’s more assertive than before, more firm in stating his opinion, and--of his siblings (not counting Connor)--uninterested in revenge. This sets him apart from almost everyone in his family. Roman sees a clear path forward, and has a desire to get there that doesn’t involve considering how to screw someone over in the process. He seems to have accepted his position with the a level of grace no one else is exhibiting. Even when the siblings win the bid for Pierce, and Kendall and Shiv rejoice over getting one over on their dad, Roman remains uncharacteristically quiet, both glad that their efforts have paid off, but conflicted over the victory over their father. When he tells his siblings that 500 million shouldn’t be spent without thought, he’s right. The money they have now will have to be invested wisely and spent purposefully so that they have a chance to actually build a future for themselves; gamble that away in repeated bids to screw over their father, and they’re already losing. Roman can see that; Shiv and Kendall cannot. As he is now, one begins to wonder what reaction Gerri will have when she sees him again for the first time. Will this version of Roman stick, or will he revert back to his old ways? Can he and his siblings really forge a future together, or are their diverging mindsets and interests likely to be their Achilles heel? We have no way of knowing now, but what I do know is that this Roman is really gratifying to see, because, it feels like this is the person he wanted to be all along.

AN: I wanted to post a quick note here to welcome back any loyal readers who return to my Succession Thoughts posts, and any newcomers who are now discovering them. As before, any thoughts/opinions are welcome, whether you agree or disagree with me. I value discussion and like hearing others’ input, and am excited for what will be my last series of posts as this show draws to a close. Also, excuse the poor quality screenshots but HBO is no longer allowing me to take them on my computer, and I don’t have the app on my phone. If it’s possible to take them on the app, let me know because, as it stands, I am taking pictures of the computer screen, lol.

#gerri/roman #gerri x roman #gerri kellman #roman roy #succession #succession hbo #hbo succession #succession thoughts

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joshleyson · 2 years

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Bohol In My Mind // film dump

07/29 - 08/02 :: Panglao, Bohol

I’ve always been fascinated by Bohol since I was a kid as I always see the iconic Chocolate Hills in my favorite history textbooks and wonder what they look like in real life but I just never got the chance and the timing to visit there. I committed last year that I would visit this beautiful island this year and I'm so happy that I did after my Boracay trip last month. I stayed in a very peaceful villa near Panglao with my friends for almost a week and it was one of the most beautiful trips I've been on this year mainly because it's not just pure beach trips and booze, those kinds of stuff, but also countryside trip tours where I get to explore the other side of the island. I brought my Kodak film cam with me to take some snapshots and here are some of the shots that were developed by a wonderful photo lab called Sunny16 somewhere in QC.

Baclayon Church, the oldest Christian church in Bohol built in 1556. I’m so amazed how structures from the past can withstand the test of time and natural disasters considering they were built without the current modern technology. I'm also amazed how recent restoration efforts did not diminish the original, classic aesthetic of the church.

The countryside trip itinerary that you can book in Bohol also includes stops in parks like the Xzootic Animal Park in Loay where you can see exotic animals. I have mixed feelings about this one. I'm not gonna lie. I was fascinated by how BIG and calm the snakes were lying in the park in a crowd of people and I was extremely bewildered how giant snakes were just lying there unbothered AF lol. Though I trust that the people in Bohol take good care of these animals, I still cannot help and think about the kind of stress these animals have to endure knowing they're animals that necessarily don't like human interaction and prefers to be on their natural habitat but they're being carried around like stuffed toys for people wanting to take selfies with them. I specifically saw one yellow snake (the one on the pic) where it seems to walk away wanting to go back to its cage and not feeling the people around him but was carried back again by the zookeepers for people who wants to take a pic with it including us! I felt a sense of worry and a sense of guilt about that but again, I know these parks operate within the bounds of laws and regulations so I'm just gonna put all my worries into that and praying they're really taking good care of these animals and hopefully touching them is no longer a practice in the future.

One of the highlights of the countryside tour was the buffet lunch on Loboc river. I wish the trip was a bit longer though but I have to say the food was great! Before we went to Chocolate Hills, we passed by a tarsier sanctuary and their man-made forest which I thought was a park but a highway with busses and vans passing through. So it's a photo-op moment at your own risk.

If there's one thing that I liked most about the countryside tour, it was the ATV around Chocolate Hills. It was fun and muddy, and I'm screaming and panicking but in a good way. It was my first time. It's like biking, but with an ATV and THEE Chocolate Hills around you. What a playground! I don't mind having my white Stan Smith sneakers covered in mud after that because it was hella fun.

The remainder of our tour was spent on island hopping and beach bumming, the latter of which is my all-time fave travel activity. But please never ever forget your SPF 30+ if you're just like me who loves to beachbum all afternoon! Panglao Bohol also has a "Boracay-like" stretch of white sand and one of them is the famous Alona Beach. Though smaller, it has finer white sands too with crystal clear open-to-all beach with restos and establishments on the beachfront for food trips that offer a variety of cuisines to try.

We also visited the infamous Virgin island the same day where some tourists were charged 26k worth of food. Honestly, I can say that their food was indeed kinda expensive for me too, and good thing we had already eaten on a nearby island after snorkeling because we knew for a fact that their food prices will be very high. It was a right choice.

The villa that we stayed in was just right. It was quiet, gave us a lot of privacy, and was just in the right proximity to Alona beach and surprisingly the food that they cooked for their guests was kinda cheap but very delicious as well. We lounged, ate, and drank in their pool once we get back from touring the island and it was a great way to cap the day.

Our stay in Bohol was kinda memorable for me as it was a combination of long roadtrips and also being able to relax on the beach and just enjoy the sun and the fresh air and it recharged me in a lot of ways. Bohol was my last stop after flying to Zamboanga and Boracay and by that time, for some reason, I kinda missed going back to work when I was in the airport flying back to Manila and I think it's a great indication that disconnecting for a bit is indeed a good motivator for our capitalist-enslaved spirits and how it breaks the tedium of "quiet-quitting" or moments when everything is just too much of a thing to get into. I’d definitely go back! : )

Balik balik sa Bohol,

vimeo

Connect with me IG & Twitter @joshleyson

📸: Kodak 35mm Funsaver 🎞: Sunny16 Lab 📱 Additional Photos: iPhone 13 Pro Max 🏡: Pineale Resort and Spa Villas 🚙: Bohol Travel and Tours

#Travel #Life Update #Film #Analog #Kodak #Bohol #Philippines #itsmorefuninthephilippines #Vimeo

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redhead1180 · 3 months

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Okay this may be weird and also idk if you know but anyway …. Okay so I’ve been watching some TikTok edits of interviews of the obx cast and especially Rudy and Madison Bailey and they seemed on and off camera great friend with potential for more . Yes I know they have significant others ( I don’t name Rudy’s partner in denial lol) but it got me thinking that maybe they were close to being more but then they both got with other people . It just seems so odd to me that they were so close in season one and maybe even2 and 3 (haven’t really seen bts stuff from that) but and I saw another anon say that they thought Elaine might have pushed him to distance himself cause now when you see bts video or pics their ( Rudy and Maddy) seem to be off . I know it’s speculation and it’s their own personal business but it just is interesting that such a great friendship ended . Anyway curious about your thoughts .

Hehehe. Well this is of course all speculation because we only see a snippet of there lives.

Watching BTS videos and interviews of s1, honestly, it really felt there was an attraction and vibe going on between Rudy and Madison. There are so many videos where one or both are just making heart or bedroom eyes. Now I, honestly don't know if they acted on it before they got with their SO. I am leaning in the they did not category, but we will never know for sure.

I see between S2 and s3 their friendship took a hit, there was words said by each's SO and it effected their relationship. There were multiple times they unfollowed each's SO on IG, then followed again, Rudy removed comments or posts pertaining to Madison and vice versa. It got kinda childish at one point. You can really see in interviews for s3 the difference in their friendship. Rudy is really stiff and standoffish to Madison.

Then last year Madison unfollowed Elaine, sometime around the start of filming s4, and since then will post weird sayings about lost friendships or wishing things were like in s1. Most assume it is about Rudy, but honestly could be about anyone. In recent BTS videos, unless filming, Rudy is off with just Elaine. He doesn't seem to hang out with the rest of the cast anymore. Not to say he doesn't, cause like I said we only see a snippet of their lives.

I don't want to start anymore rumors than there already are about them, that is just what we see from the outside. I try to be neutral and not read too much into things, but some of it is really hard not to. I do think there was some heated words and maybe more, but to say it was all Elaine, I am not so sure. I think it was all of them.

Just my thoughts.

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wetheoriginals · 1 year

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I'm just curious and please post if you can cause I'm curious and I feel like other sane Army's would want to know. I don't know why it's on my mind, but who all have BTS dated or are with? If you don't know that fine, but everytime I try to look it up it gets social media "buried" and I can't tell if they (army) are doing that to protect them or because they are in denial of grown humans dating.

uh huh even though it technically is to protect the members, army mostly gatekeep because they’re delulu and in denial of them being grown ass men. i’ll try to list everything i’ve heard but pls take it with a grain of salt

yoongi: suran is the most notable one, there’s plenty of stuff out there like a pic of her holding yoongi’s dog and wearing his clothes. iu is more dodgy but i’ll still mention it because she wore the same clothes as him a couple of times around the months before and after eight came out. and it’s not like they were notable designer items they were just random sweaters. but whatever it was they obviously decided to just be friends since they collabed again and she has a bf now. oh yeah and there’s also pics of him with a big tittie baddie from the debut days and i love it lmaoo.

jimin: he was with some member of gfriend during the early days i forget her name i’ll edit this if i remember. more recently last year there was rumors of him and an actress named song da-eun after she sat behind him at a soccer game. fans started digging and there ended up being other instances of them going to the same places. but her agency denied the rumors after they gained a lot of traction and that’s where that ended.

jungkook: the tattoo artist named m1joo he got caught hugging really was his girlfriend and not just a friend like the damage control statement claimed. pretty unfortunate sitch but other than that he was spotted last year with a mystery girl on several occasions such as in qatar, jeju island, and a bbq spot in seoul. no one has been able to id her but a lot of people think it’s lee yubi an actress he’s had rumors with for a while.

hobi: only one i know of is irene kim, she’s an influencer and i love her instagram acc. i actually followed her before even getting into bts. but armytwt makes jokes and are convinced he’s just her gay best friend. idk if you ask me someone of the opposite sex who is just a friend doesn’t travel across the world for you twice (ptd in vegas shows and lollapalooza). besides that they attended several of the same events last year including an art gallery event with namjoon. for me it’s a bit naive to think she’s just a friend unless he really is fruity which is a whole other discussion i won’t participate in.

taehyung: maybe like a year or so ago there was major rumors of him with an heiress named joana chun after they got photographed at an art gallery and it made him so pissed he got on weverse and denied it himself. funny enough guess who is one of joana’s closest friends? none other than my homegirl jennie. so we now know why the rumors made him so angry because people had the wrong girl! lol.

-namjoon: zero clue, although he and soyoon have hung out a lot recently and army are actually shipping them i don’t buy it. he seems super rational i don’t think he would enter a relationship just as he’s about to enlist. besides her he seems to exclusively enjoy the company of non-celebrities when it comes to friendships so i assume all his exes are the private citizens too.

-jin: zero clue, all i know is that he comes from an insanely wealthy family so celeb women probably don’t interest him either. but the members did say his house resembles that of newlyweds so do with that whatever you want, lol.

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procrastinatorproject · 1 year

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I posted 1,878 times in 2022

48 posts created (3%)

1,830 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@tehriz

@regionalpancake

@thelaithlyworm

@jazzfic

@stra-tek

I tagged 1,875 of my posts in 2022

#star trek picard - 443 posts

#funny stuff - 442 posts

#cristobal rios - 152 posts

#star trek picard season 2 - 115 posts

#star trek - 110 posts

#picardpositivity - 98 posts

#i have such talented friends! - 90 posts

#picard season 2 spoilers - 85 posts

#cats - 76 posts

#tumblr - 75 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#and how else are you going to share bits of stories that you won't post for months or years if ever because finishing things is hard 🙈😅

My Top Posts in 2022:

I spent quite some time yesterday yelling about Star Trek with the wonderful @regionalpancake and @curator-on-ao3, and I need to share their comedic genius with the world!

We were talking about how, if the Zhat Vash are so extremely opposed to synthetic life and any form of AI, could they possibly manage to hack the androids on Mars and to cause them to go rogue? To which Curator commented:

“I’m an iPhone user and I couldn’t hack an android!”

This was followed some time later by a discussion about how in recent Trek, there has been an increasing distinction between People Who Matter and Those Who Don’t. And how its encumbent upon the people who are less significant for the fate of the world to sacrifice themselves for the Important People.

With regards to this, Pancakes observed of Rose (from Dr Who), a character who thinks she is unimportant and whom the Doctor tells that There Are No Unimportant People:

“If she were a Star Trek character, Rose would have been cannon fodder.”

Curator: “You mean... canon fodder? :D”

I don’t know if these are funny to anyone but me, but I laughed so hard I had to go find my asthma spray. So I needed to share XD

59 notes - Posted July 30, 2022

Holo-Tech Database

Over the last seven or so months, I have watched through every episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. It’s the first time I’ve seen the entire series, there were quite a few episodes in the later seasons I’d never seen before. Quite an enjoyable experience on the whole.

But because I’m me, of course I didn’t just watch TNG. Instead, I took notes every single time the holodeck or any other piece of holo-technology played a part in the plot, were the setting for even the briefest of scenes, or so much as got mentioned. Essentially, I’m building towards a database of every little scrap of canonical information about holo-technology that I can get my hand on. And this was a start.

I haven’t had the time or energy to look through all of my notes in detail. There is a lot of information in there already. Of course, I’ll only be able to draw any real conclusions once I add in all the data from DS9, Voyager, and PIC, (since I’m interested in the state of technology at the time La Sirena is in operation, because of course that’s what this is about), but it’ll be quite a while before I get there.

So, in lieu of any detailed analysis, here are some quick impressions of my first foray into holo-episode-tracking!

[Image ID: a table showing the number of total holo-episodes for TNG is 58, and breaking that number down for each season. Season 1 has 10 episodes, season 2 has 8, season 3 has 6, season 4 has 9, season 5 and 6 both have 8, and season 7 has 9 episodes. /end ID]

See the full post

65 notes - Posted January 27, 2022

30 Days of Picard Postivity

With just over 30 days to go, the premiere of Star Trek: Picard season 2 (3rd March in the US, 4th March internationally) is fast approaching, and I for one cannot wait to get back into the world I fell in love with two years ago. Thirty days is quite some time, however, and even though new trailers and promo pics seem to be dropping daily, I felt like we could use something to tide us over until March.

After the long hiatus, I think this is the perfect time to revisit all the things we enjoyed about season 1. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has forgotten a lot of the details of those episodes, and who would love to see some of the wonderful characters, locations, and stories back on my dash. So, without further ado:

ProcrastinatorProject Proudly Presents:

30 Days of Picard Positivity

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70 notes - Posted February 1, 2022

Massive Picard Season 2 Spoilers Ahead

So the latest episode of The Ready Room, the Star Trek recap show hosted by Wil Wheaton, had a preview of Season 2 of Star Trek: Picard. It's interviews with all of the main actors and they explain in some detail where they're characters are at at the beginning of season 2.

It puts a lot of shots from the trailers in perspective and I have a lot of thoughts that I want to share, but because this is a very, very explicit spoilery preview, I'm putting both the video and my initial reaction under the cut.

Anyone in the US (or with a decent VPN): You can find the full Ready Room episode on the Paramount+ youtube page, but I'm not going to link it here, because, youk know, tumblr 😋

See the full post

73 notes - Posted February 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I just had a realization about why Agnes Jurati’s story in Star Trek: Picard season 2 feels so wrong to me, and I am going to inflict it on all of you!

Spoilers for the entirety of season 2 ahead! CW: Mention of depression, PTSD, anxiety, and emotional manipulation

Also: CW long post

(NB: I’m going to completely disregard the discrepancy in Agnes’s character between seasons 1 and 2. I think when you take Agnes’s story and development from the first season into account, her “arc” in season 2 falls apart completely. But for the sake of this argument, I’m going to meet the season 2 writers on their terms. I’m going to ignore the character of season 1 Agnes, and instead will simply look at season 2′s Jurati to explain why I think the story the writers gave her falls flat.)

I was taking notes for a way-too-long essay about my problems with PIC season 2 (which I may or may not write eventually), and I was trying to put into words why it always irks me when people say merging with the Borg Queen was a satisfying end to Jurati’s arc.

What I was never able to put my finger on until now is that when the Borg Queen and Jurati merge at the end of episode 9, that’s not actually the culmination of Jurati’s arc. It’s the Queen’s.

See the full post

74 notes - Posted May 20, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #i want to point out that of the almost 2000 posts on my blog this year #THREE were not tagged! THREE! 🤣😂🤣😂#i knew i was an obsessive tagger but i didn't think my record was *that* good #(not that most of the tagging is particularly consistent....)#also: so many of my friends! 🤩#also also: 'star trek picard' beat out 'funny stuff' by ONE post #at least i am balanced? 🤣🙈#anyway. this is fun!

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cheekydogs · 2 years

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Hi!! Call me Aegis (pronounced EE-Juhs) or Egg for short (they/them, lesbian, white) :) welcome to my plush blog!!

I’m a 22 year old recent college graduate, and I’m autistic and disabled. I’ve loved plushes for my entire life, but only re-started collecting within the last few years!! My fav brands are Webkinz, Jellycat, Douglas, ItemLabel, Pillow Pets, Pokémon Center, and Squishables, but I like most plushes!!

DNI If: Radfem, Gold Star Lesbian, Kink/NSFW Blog, DDLG/CGL Blog, Pro-ED, MAP/NOMAP, Normal DNI Criteria

While my blog will (probably) mostly be reblogs, I may occasionally post pics of my own plushes!! I’ve occasionally brought plushes places with me for comfort and grounding before, but I've started doing it more in the last year due to a traumatic accident. While I’ve been recovering well, it’s still fun to have a little friend out with me!

Here’s a link to my carrd where I list my plushes, +my dreamies if you’re interested!!

My current comfort plush is a Webkinz Signature Chow Chow named Sunny, and the plush I currently plan on bringing around with me the most (due to wanting to protect Sunny, myself, and my partner from COVID) is a Jellycat Little Henry Hound named Wee Hen. Both were gifts from my loving partner <3 Also up there is Trumpet, a plush Boston terrier from a small brand on Etsy that my best friend got for me, and Motor Oil, an ItemLabel Series 2 Special Secret OuiOui (or PengOui) :)

While a cheeky dog is not my current comfort plush, my favorite Webkinz when I was a little kid was a pink punch cheeky dog named Beauty. I loved her so much I even wrote her name on her tag (which I ever only did 1 other time), and I recently brought her back home from my parents’ house! I would love to get other cheeky dogs once I have the money too, and the original cheeky dog is one of my dreamies, tho I doubt I’ll ever be able to get one 😔

This is not an AgeRe blog, I’m just a guy (gender-neutral) who likes plushes, but I’m 100% SFW AgeRe friendly!! Same goes for Age Dreamers!!

If you know me irl, or are from my main blog, please ask before following!! If you don’t I might honestly just block you. If you ask, there’s a 99.999% chance I’ll just say yes tho!! And on a similar topic, feel free to ask for my main blog!!

#just my pinned post before I start rbing stuff :)#last edited on: January 13th 2024 #it's been so long I've started using a new name! Crazy

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ruanbaijie · 2 years

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recently got tagged in a number of tag games and after leaving some of them to ferment into wine here goes!

a get to know me :D

tagged by: @sleepytortellini thank you lena! ^^

rules: tag some people you want to get to know better.

favourite time of the year: long weekends and holidays

favourite collection: my danmei shrine

comfort food: japanese curry, dumplings

favourite drink: bubble tea (especially taro), soy milk

favourite songs: most recent one is the call from league of legends. also the adele soundtrack from maplestory aklsdkfkllk

favourite artist: if it’s art art, takato yamamoto and alphonse mucha. if music, imagine dragons

favourite fic: I don’t read fanfic at all... (ง ื▿ ื)ว

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NEW CHALLENGE

tagged by: @koujaaku tysm jenna!

ok actually supposed to reblog from here but I’m just consolidating all the tag games I recently got tagged in aklsdklf

1. FIRST, create a picrew using this maker, and then 2. SECOND take this quiz on how fandom would see you if you were a fictional character. 3 (THIRD) POST YOUR PIC AND YOUR DESCRIPTION IN THE REBLOG!

they didn’t have that many short hair options ;u;

the hot one: You're that one hunk that EVERYONE has a crush on. Your wit and charm is known to make fangirls faint, and half of the entire fandom's thirst posts are about you. You could eat a cookie and everyone would lose their shit. Congrats, dude.

(I fucking snorted)

this or that

tagged by: @talays-portkey thank you vish~

hot shower or cold shower // texting or calling // earbuds or headphones // paperback or hardcover // matte or gel // 12 hour clock or 24 hour clock // blue or green // sunsets or sunrises // tulips or orchids // candle light or moonlight // sci-fi or horror BOTH BOTH IS GOOD // pen or pencil // pandas or koalas // gold or silver // sneakers or boots this is illegal to choose between // denim jacket or leather jacket // pink or purple // chocolate or sour candy // deodorant or perfume // drive-in movie theatre or the cinema // pastel colours or neutral earth tones // lemonade or fruit juice // past or future //

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tagged by: @zelkam ty aneta!!

name: hanyi

star sign: taurus

height: 157cm

time: 8.50pm

birthday: 14 may

favourite bands/ artists: imagine dragons, blackpink

last movie: I cannot for the love of all things holy remember what the last movie I watched was

last show: last episode- alchemy of souls. last finished show- the sandman

when did i create this blog: october 2010

what i post: 🤡

last thing i googled: “alchemy of souls mydramalist” lmao hahahahahah

other blogs: none in this house we mash all our interests together

do i get asks: occasionally

following: 398

average hours of sleep: 5-6 hours

instruments: piano, guzheng, guitar (badly)

what i’m wearing: red t-shirt and black shorts

dream job: I’ve been asking myself since I was 13 honey

dream trip: many places in china, road trip in scotland and ireland

nationality: singaporean

favourite songs: most recent one is the call from league of legends. also the adele soundtrack from maplestory aklsdkfkllk (i might have copied and pasted this from the first tag game)

last book i’ve read: currently reading- the lawyer 一级律师 (mu su li). last completed- global examination 全球高考 (mu su li)

top 3 fictional universes i’d like to live in: the sandman universe bc i might be hyperfixated on that show now, his dark materials bc i’ve always wanted a daemon, daybreakers bc i really love the vampire lore there

#tag game

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byanyan · 2 years

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i figured it out last night: i’ve been away from my blogs for roughly ten months. tbh i knew it was like, 6+ months, but i didn’t realize it was almost a year?? man, no wonder i’ve been missing everything so hard recently.

for anyone interested in me on a personal level, i thought a quick catch-up might be fun (bc this past year has been kinda wild, at least for me). so, in the past ten months, i: got a dog, agreed to move provinces with my mom, drove 10+ hours through the rockies in 1-2 days three times in one month (one of these times we literally drove all night, it was dawn when we got back to the hotel), lived in a shitty little hotel for an entire month with mom + dog, completed the move to another province, and-- well, okay, most of the wild stuff was the move, and that’s just been over the last three months, so... i guess i overexaggerated a little. but yeah!! i live in the mountains now, which is something i never thought i’d get to do!

oh, and doggo. we rescued him back in september. he’d been living in the bush for a while when he was found and my god, he was the most nervous boy in the beginning. he was afraid of everything, didn’t know really how to accept attention, and didn’t even really know how to play with a toy. you should see him now though, he talks all the time, he’s crazy cuddly, and he’s now taken to wanting to run up to anyone he sees to say hello lmao. UGH he’s such a sweetie, i’ll have to share pics sometime. i could talk about him and how much he’s grown for hours. his name is hobi (yes, we did name him after a particular ray of sunshine, but it suited him so well that, while it was a joke at first, it stuck) and he’s the weirdest dog with some of the strangest habits, some of which i’m sure to talk about in the future.

tl;dr, get to blog stuff: i’m officially back & i’ll be looking to get back to writing very soon. i need to do some tidying around here, i’ll probably be mass deleting drafts & asks for a fresh start but there’s always a strong chance i’ll find some stuff i don’t want to get rid of, so you might see some replies or answers to super old stuff. don’t feel the need to reply in these instances if you don’t want to! you’ll likely see some meme reblogs soon (probably today bc i’m impatient), and messages (and/or discord) are very open for plotting or general chatting!!

-- oh, & other blogs are gonna be revived too. i’ll probably be poking at my canon multi today bc boy have i got muse for some of those kids again.

#love u guyssss #i just. wanted to share. i don't talk to a lot of people so these kinds of things get pent up lmao #i feel i've also grown a lot as a person (and am working to continue to do so) since i was last on #oh and i turned 29 which i hate (:#but that's beside the point #i'm back babyyyyyy & i'm aiming to be more chill about rp so i have a better time and stick around more consistently #bc this is the hobby i think i've missed the most #sorry for the long post lmao i just figured it'd be good to get all this out in one go #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ OOC ⋮ DON’T @ ME.

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inkofamethyst · 2 years

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August 8, 2022

Me n all my homies hate quizlet and today begins my relationship with ~StudyStack~ bc quizlet be out here greedy with they all-our-good-features-are-now-premium nonsense. It’s one thing to add paid content and quite another to put existing content behind a paywall. It sucks bc me n quizlet got history. I’ve been using that site for years. Since ninth grade y’all. And they tryna pull a Notability and make us pay for stuff we been using. Absolutely not. I hope they lose their user base tbh. Anyway StudyStack seems better in most ways it’s just clearly not as well-known, but I’ll have to wait and see whether the ads are debilitating or not.

I watched the Snyder Cut while helping my sister braid her hair. It’s just kind of.. long? Like the movie is fine and quite.. extensive.. but it’s over twice the length of a normal movie. I will say that despite its length, I think the pacing and plot development was really well done, in my opinion. There was a constant build toward the climax, and even though it was “slow,” it was still constantly moving and I feel like that’s the most difficult part.

I’ve also been watching The Bachelorette with my dad (this is my first time) and it’s kinda wild and while I try my hardest to stay away from reality TV, I get why people watch these kinds of shows and I’ve totally been sucked in. I mean I don’t think I intend to watch The Bachelor season that follows (...I guess that remains to be seen bc if miss brunette lady doesn’t end up with mr. dreadlocks man and he’s the next bachelor (which I don’t think he will be tbh) I might have to), but I plan to see this one through lol.

Today I’m thankful that I should never ever ever have to memorize another stupid chem mechanism again ever. That fact just hit me and has filled me with glee.

About to go on vacation with my family and I know this is a terrible thing to say because this is a privilege that is being paid for and I’m probably going to have fun but it honestly feels a little bit more like an obligation than a vacation.

Also I’ve lowkey been hating myself recently and that does not feel great. Uhm.

Finally I have to get a minor procedure for my toeeeee because it didn’t fix itselffffff (I suppose one positive way to look at it is that I don’t have to get the procedure on both toes because one of them did (or at least it looks like it’s going to) fix itself) and like logically I know the anesthetic discomfort will only last less than a minute and that the procedure will be over before I can even start to cry (hyperbole but still) but I hate needles with all my mind, body, strength, heart, and soul. Well, I guess if I ever wanna sell feet pics online bc phd salaries suck then I’d have to have pretty feet and if this is how I get there then so be it. I’m mostly kidding.

Oh also (this is a complete non-sequitur but yknow) I’m thankful for the DnD game my dnd-friend invited me to pay with her, her bf, and her brother!!!!! It was a one-shot that she created and DM’d as a first-time DM and she did such an amazing job and the storyline was certainly well-crafted and it was fun going through the mystery and AGH I’m literally so proud of her :D

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kaimactrash · 2 years

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Eyy, okay this group is a little lacking, and it's entirely my fault.I've been pretty oblvious to the asexual identities until a few years ago, and since quite a lot of my characters were made before that, the number of non-allosexual OCs I have are currently small.I don't really love like re-writing characters sexual identiites unless it comes from inspiration, and quite often when making my characters I have a pretty clear idea of their personality and identity, that can change, but i don't like to force it, so instead I look forward to seeing which identities will occur, now I have a better, but still a little shallow, understanding of the aroace identities.

read more for info on characters!

Anyway, here's all my character so far who fall on the spectrum, starting from the top left we have Saulo! They are an elder demon in my story, as are two of the other characters here, because I designed the elders much more recently than the other characters in my story! Saulo is a pan/demi and non-binary, they're a jokey playful little imp who doesn't take their role as an elder too seriously, rarely taking on under demons like hokeys, sucubi, and incubi. Spends a lot of their time making music, reading comics and manga their underlings show them, and looking for their best friend Calo, who's been missing some time. Their extremely into lovey dovey stuff, love core style, so their wand and magic has heart shapes too it. Top right is our second Elder Demon, Delde, she keeps herself far from her fellow elders, married for thousands of years to her life partner, Emesh, a demi-god who you can check my galley for more info on like Calo, she's ace/bi and trans woman!She's a very quiet shy woman still getting used to her physical limiatitions, but having plenty of time to do so, and a loving support system around her. Bottom right is Milo! the 3rd and final elder, hes very bubbly and sometimes intentionally niave, he has a good heart, but he doesn't do enough to oppose his other elders, and participates in the recruitment drive his co-elders push for. Still, he'll chose the right side when it really comes down to it, currently it's easier to coast and not make waves, and a big part of this is his sudden development of diablities, such as losing his hand. he's an ace/omni trans man! Bottom center is one of my older characters, and she was one i really struggled to figure out identity wise, but as I got to know her more and finalised her design and story arc, she felt like an ace lesbian above all else! an absolute unit of a demon, she stirred up so much trouble for elder Rilo she was chuffed, and eventually banished by them. This leads to a lot of fights with large beasts, leaving her scarred physically and mentally. She's partially blind, with only shaows visible in her left eye. She was a much more anthro creature before becoming a demon, being a Cathze, a cat like speices of bipedal humanoids. she also featured on my lesbian pride pic from last year! the design change is intentional, I am always trying to find lotties perfect look, I think this may be it? I feel it has a much more unique look versus the last design. Last but not least left bottom is a character not too old, but who I am obcessed with. :lmao: IDK why but she just give me dopamine whenever I draw her, it's the one eyed fitness nut, Greip Tavros! She's a rather charming woman with a lot of power behind her punch, she loves socialising and gets on really well with most others. She tries her best to know about as many popular topics as possible to make sure she always knows atleast one topic to discuss to help newbies out when joining the rebellion on frenrar. She works constantly on the defence plan agianst both a small group of elders, and from the mages college who are over stepping their jurisdiction and commiting some very unethical acts to ensure a continuing supply of new mages coming. She's aro/pan! Welp, probably a good time to explain where the hell I've been all pride month, since I'm posting my first pride piece, on the 25th of June? Yeah, well, first of is kinda nice news. I've adopted a dog this month and I'm still very much getting my footing with my life balance changing up! And secondly is massive despression and anxiety becuase this started as an awful time to be trans at pride, to an awful time to have a uterus during pride, I can't say I've had a lot of time I've felt safe being proud this month, but i did get a new binder which I'm completely in love with, so thats the only good pride month thing for me so far. Feels like theres been a shadow looming over us this whole time that is rappidly hurtling towards us. Anyway, take care of each other.

#oc art #kai art #my art #artist #Artists of Tumblr #lgbtqia artists #aro #ace #asexuality #aromantic #trans #demon oc #nonbinary oc

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omegaplus · 2 years

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# 4,110

Captured Tracks, 2022.

What makes Omega WUSB great is how we create tributes as part of what we play on air. They allow us to get to know our favorite labels better and gives our listeners a nicer surprise from our usual spinning-wheel craziness. Most of them we previously featured are from New York City such as Sacred Bones, Hospital Productions, Wharf Cat, and Mexican Summer. Just recently, Captured Tracks joined that list of labels that deserved it. Do a little due diligence (say that three times fast) and you’ll see that Mike Sniper has had his hands in plenty of things. He owns the umbrella Omnian Group, does illustration for other artists, made music as Blank Dogs, and was part of other bands, too. And he’s owned a couple of record stores, too. Sideman Records was up for a couple of years until the y recently closed down, but his other store named after his Captured Tracks label, is still up. That’s good because I’ve been meaning to visit.

After Amityville’s High Fidelity wiped me out like no other (two visits cost me $893.00 in total), I had one more stop I was planning to visit and call it quits. That was Innersleeve Records until I took a better look at their sticker prices posted on social media. Right then and there I declared my island-wide record store victory tour finally over and any city-wide visit to other stores were treated as “bonus rounds”, which two visits to Academy’s Brooklyn and Manhattan locations already counted. Captured Tracks just posted some nice pics- of their stock and I’ve been meaning to go, so let’s give a proper end to a great expensive run.

I arrived at the Central Islip station, sweltering in the low 80’s and as bright as bright can be. The train took off westbound to Penn Station for a 75-minute ride. I told myself it was going to be a great day. When I did, I noticed something somewhat disappointing. Nothing said there was going to be pending thunderstorms for the next few days, but here they come as I looked to my right. Surely enough daylight went dark and it came down hard from Jamaica all the way to Penn Station. I didn’t come above and out to 34th Street to experience it because I went under to catch the ‘E’ line. Everyone waiting for the alphabet lines were baking and drenched in sweat from all the unbearable post-rain humidity filling the platforms beneath. Thank the Lord for air-conditioned transit. I got off at 23rd and Court Square to the ‘G’ and finally came up at the Greenpoint Ave. stop. It was all clear, as if the horrible weather never happened. You wouldn’t even noticed, either.

Down Manhattan Ave., I turn left on Calyer St. and look for #195. Where the hell is it? I look up and there was the wooden Captured Tracks sign nailed above the window. I wouldn’t have realized that I walked past it as it was perfectly blended in the residential buildings. How cute. I walk up the stairs only to be confronted by a closed door and push-button lock. It can’t fucking be. I look below and there was a flight of concrete steps leading to the basement entrance. Immediately I felt an amazing spell, as if I just discovered a well-hidden secret that almost no one knew. I never entered a music-store this way. That’s what made it magical.

I walk through the front door to find not that many people lurking for new finds. There were only three staffers: one behind the counter checking their Discogs store online, another restocking the vinyl bins, and the last sitting behind the desk in the back corner observing Lord knows what. None of them were Mike Sniper. I walk around the narrow space which was mostly nice and neatly organized; a cellar space adorned with chipped paint on the walls, pipes and valves that would make Super Mario and Luigi gladly pay their 100 coins a month each to live in. I reminded myself why I was here in the first place: to see if their selection matches that of what their label offered.

Captured Tracks were the kings of organization. Everything organized by genre, label, and artist name. Sure, they had the standard classic rock, psych-, and metal LPs. But walk around and they had a full selection of jazz, soul, and R&B to start. They carried several bins of classic disco and dance classified right down to the label. Salsoul, Motown, Casablanca - they weren’t handwritten but instead their tabs and dividers were logo’ed. Want classic motion picture soundtracks from the Eighties-on backward? Pre-war jazz and vocals? Reggae and Bollywood? Greek, Israeli, Brazilian, French, Italian, and Latin artists? They specialize what the other stores don’t. Almost nothing where it shouldn’t be.

First order of business was the cassette section nailed right next to the entrance. They had way less on the shelves than they posted and nothing got to me. In the middle of the store were…eight-tracks? Fifteen of them were posted on a board in the middle of the store. That’s all they had. If I had a player, then no doubt I would be even consider spending $30.00 for either Lonnie Liston Smith’s Expansions and Roy Ayers’ Red Black And Green for $35.00. Adjacent to them were a small pot of CDs, maybe no more that a hundred. So what did I say about how hard it was finding Suicide albums? For $7.00 I was able to get Alan Vega’s Mutator. What tasteless muppet who knows nothing about art and culture sold his copy back to the store? Which other labelmate of his was also in the pot? Marissa Nadler, of course. Her latest full-length The Path Of The Clouds cost $12.00, the highest-priced purchase of the day.

No record-store excursion would be complete without getting a crack at some jazz and fusion. Same to be said about what Roy Ayers records they had. Still no A Tear To A Smile, but instead Let’s Do It sitting in which I already had. But, going across I did find plenty familiar artists with albums I never seen before in the wild from Ron Carter, Ramsay Lewis, Jeff Lorber Fusion, Herbie Mann, and Hank Crawford. I had a chance to pick up two Kool & The Gang records: Wild And Peaceful and The Force. I held off because off of Wild And Peaceful there was “Hollywood Swingin’” and “Jungle Boogie”, and I wouldn’t have been happy if the entire record went in that direction. The Force reminded me that I wasn’t familiar with -The Gang aside from those two, “Summer Madness”, and Love And Understanding. Going a little bit to the right to Hubert Laws’ divider and I find found it: How To Beat The High Cost Of Living with Earl Klugh. That was a huge personal win for me. That motion-picture soundtrack was part of last year’s impeccable, memorable, golden Spring.

Captured Tracks had a small section for hip-hop / rap LPs and 12” singles. Nothing piqued my interest as I wouldn’t spent more than a few dollars on a piece of wax with one or two songs. Their selection of those artists jumped around ranging from Eighties mainstays to Nineties unknowns. The only thing I took with me from those bins was Kool Moe Dee’s Knowledge Is King and that was it.

I figured to give the soul bins a shot and I win another Blackbyrds record, a tattered copy of Bootsy Collins Rubber Band, and The Olympic Runners’ Don’t Let Up - one which would sound so familiar if you’re a Planet Asia & Talib Kweli fan.

Across from the front desk were two stations with four bins each of new arrivals with lots of rare, unknown, and obscure jazz, rock, soul, and soundtracks. Of the fifteen minutes it took me to thumb through it all, the only thing I saw of interest was Blank Stare’s self-titled. It may have been their only hardcore / punk title in the entire store Captured Tracks had as they weren’t known to carry much of it. During that time of lurking through their new arrivals did the staff bring up how much of a psychotic asshole Drew Carey was in real life, and speculated if his Hollywood personality was the reason why his then-wife took her own life. Their words, not mine.

But do give them lots of points as possible for having a straight, organized, and in-reach section of 45’s and 7” records (take that, High Fidelity!). I counted at least 50 categorized white boxes labeled with jukebox hits, punk, new-wave, jazz, country, rock, decades, and more. They had more than enough of reggae and soul with new arrivals of 45’s up for grabs as well with dedicated boxes of legendary artists (Elvis) and others divided and categorized. Good thing I’m still thirsty for Eighties’ hits from my Atari childhood and I bought plenty of them. Simple Minds, Janet Jackson, Kim Carnes, Thomspon Twins. No shame here, and neither should anyone feel it when they practice self-care.

Displayed were many top-dollar records on the wall and over the bins. Those carried the heaviest prices. A copy of Fear’s debut clocked in for $30.00 and The Dictators Go Girl Crazy goes for $40.00. Buzzcocks’ In A Different Kitchen and Sex Pistols’ Never Mind The Bullocks were stickered for $45.00. The Smiths’ The Queen Is Dead went for $50.00 and their self-titled for $55.00. The 7” records on the wall were just a criminal. $25.00 got you Merzbow & Gore Beyond Necropsy’s Rectal Grinder on blue vinyl. Another blue (transparent) 7” was posted which was KRS-One’s “Sound Of The Police” remix which went for $50.00 ($70.00 on Discogs at the time of posting). Two Pharcyde singles were also pinned to the wall: “Otha Fish” sold for $25.00 while “Passin’ Me By” was asking for $60.00. For a piece of wax? That’s insanity, but Brooklyn’s residents need to pony up that rent money, don’t they?

On the floor were many crates of $3.00 records which never occurred to me to burrow through, and they had tons of shelves of LPs under the bins but were marked ‘not for sale’. Might be for the better. It would’ve eaten up another hour-and-a-half of my time and maybe more of my wallet. On the other side was the usual classic rock every store needs to sell in order to stay in business. The most amusing? All the Eric Clapton records were under the ‘Craptonia’ section. (Either they hate his anti-masking stance or have a thing with loved ones falling to their deaths.) I looked through all I could and something didn’t add up: where were all those indie and post-punk / d.i.y. I was looking forward to find? I didn’t see any. I assumed Captured Tracks would carry that kind of stuff because they have Mac Demarco, Beach Fossils, DIIV, Molly Burch, and Wild Nothing on their label. And they’re from Brooklyn. How could they not have stuff like Yard Act’s debut release, Special Interest, Gong Gong Gong, Guerilla Toss, or anything from Wharf Cat? Which was why I had a field day at Rough Trade (before moving out of Williamsburg) and both of Academy’s locations. But at least they had a Thee Oh Sees record somewhere. That qualifies, right?

I’m about five minutes away from declaring an end to this year’s record-store victory tour. I took my pile of finds to the front counter to be added up. I asked the guy with the blonde hair and glasses if those records marked ‘not for sale’ were really off-limits. He explained that they were Discogs stock for the store and need to keep tabs on their stock, which was fine by me. Pain alleviated. He gave me a couple of titles for free and everything came out to $118.00 including New York State (vampire) tax. Good thing I brought two totes with me because I wasn’t taking any chances having my purchase melt in this 90* July heat. Not happening now, not happening ever. I thanked him for everything, walked upstairs and out on Calyer St. with my stash to a bright, clear, glorious Greenpoint sky.

**********

It’s over. It’s finally over. With me leaving Captured Tracks, the record-store victory tour has come to an official close. I did all that I wanted to do and then more. Almost two months of intensive free-spending without worry and practicing self-care and individualism to the fullest. I was the sun which everything else revolved around - the ventures to Queens and Brooklyn, Easter with my Italian Coney Island family, Roman connections, an ambitious Summer broadcasting season at WUSB, the spirit of Sacred Bones’ 15th Anniversary showcase permanently swirling around me, visits to the retro video arcade down the road from me, seeing friends from the Brentwood era, dinner in Calverton, and a small but all-essential conversation with my #1 favorite ginger. I’ve been spinning up some good spaces on the wheel with no signs of losing.

While walking up to Manhattan Ave. to catch the ‘G’ line, I noticed that a curious point of interest had its doors open. That place was Sunshine Laundromat, a locale I’ve read all about but been meaning to visit for the longest time. It’s an actual laundromat with a concealed backdoor that opens up to reveal a backroom pinball arcade. I never noticed it being there until now but finally I found it! It was only 5:45PM and I had all the time in the world to spare. So why not go in? I have nothing to lose.

I enter the laundromat and I slowly look around. It’s a very narrow space to maneuver around with only two or three pinball tables present and a wall of built-in washing machines and dryers. I notice a lady in the back sorting out a mound of clothes. Behind her is that door that leads to (multiball) paradise. I peer right behind her as she looks up and notices me.

“Hi! How can I help you?” she greets me with a smile. I told her that with genuine interest that I read about the laundromat and asked her if the backroom is open. She told me that they’re under renovations but also are awaiting to have their permit approved by the city. She also said that most likely if all goes to plan, then the arcade will re-open for business in a few weeks. It was alleviating news that made me feel good on the inside and made me walk out a more hopeful being.

It was a mood experiencing two crowded subway cars sharing cramped space with everyone imaginable. It wasn’t an eternal wait for the Central Islip line to arrive which the big ride out east was symbolic in itself. Not many people boarded the car I was riding. I sat facing away in the opposite direction. The 7PM sun in its intense beaming yellow glory was all alone in the sky with no clouds or miserable humidity to share it with. Both The Offset: Spectacles followed by Daniel Johnston’s “In A Lifetime” play along with the air conditioner’s cold snap on the way home as I think about what August and September will have in store for me.

The wheel landed on ‘DOUBLE YOUR MONEY’. I told myself it was going to be a great day. And I was right.

Jon Lucien: Premonition LP

Ron Carter: Peg Leg LP

Ramsey Lewis: Love Notes LP

Hubert Laws & Earl Klugh: How To Beat The High Cost Of Living LP

Weather Report: Tale Spinnin’ LP

Olympic Runners: Don’t Let Up LP

Bootsy’s Rubber Band: Stretchin’ It Out In… LP

Jeff Lorber Fusion, The: self-titled LP

Blackbyrds: Unfinished Business LP

Herbie Mann: Sunbelt LP

Hank Crawford: Cajun Sunrise LP

Kool Moe Dee: Knowledge Is King LP

Blank Stare: self-titled LP

Police, The: “Every Breath You Take” 7”

Simple Minds: “Don’t You Forget About Me” 7”

Bangles, The: “In Your Room” 7”

Thompson Twins: “Hold Me Now” 7”

Janet Jackson: “Let’s Wait A While” 7”

Kim Carnes: “Bette Davis Eyes” b/w “Miss You Tonight” 7”

Alan Vega: Mutator CD

Marissa Nadler: The Path Of The Clouds CD

#personal #NYC #New York City #BK #Brooklyn #records #vinyl #omega #music #mixtapes #reviews #playlists #jazz #fusion #funk #punk #pop #synthpop #hip-hop #rap #golden era

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somewhatclever · 2 months

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I've been tagged on a tag game! Yay!

tagged by: @seimsisk

last song I listened to: Jawbone by Me Rex (I've been listening to this album [Giant Elk] for, like, 6 months now; also Hellmode by Jeff Rosenstock, and Alt. Account by Equipment)

currently watching: Nothing / Twitch? I kinda got way behind on actual TV / Web series. I usually just watch speedruns and casual streams by former speedrunners. That's if I'm not playing games myself.

currently reading: Lately, lots of papers describing fossil cranes and close relatives that I need for calibrating a divergence time analysis I'm running... again (shoutouts to Gerald Mayr for doing an excellent job summarizing this body of literature in several of his papers and providing opinions that I wouldn't be able to form on my own.). I also read several webcomics, notably Gunnerkrigg Court and Nature of Nature's Art)

currently obsessed with: Outside of work? Not really obsession, but I've been learning to play Risk of Rain 2 lately in the evenings (I'm not very good... yet; in my defense, the game doesn't do a great job of describing how certain effects/items stack, so it's difficult to intuit what's "good").

favorite color: I usually answer this with "dark red / maroon", but it's hard to justify it being my favorite color? I do like that color, but I find myself wearing browns and greens and greys most of the time rather than reds. So, highly context dependent question, really.

five things that make me happy:

"Solving the Problem" Moments - Like, in a very general sense, having figured something out. I've recently had an opportunity to work on a couple of things outside of what I normally work on, and I've really enjoyed figuring out new things lately. Also had one of these during the solar eclipse when I noticed Venus during totality and had a moment of understanding where I could clearly visualize the relative positions of the Earth, sun, moon, and Venus just based on what I was seeing. A very "oh, I live on a celestial body" moment. Point being there's a difference between knowing something is true and getting it, and it's the latter I'm after.

Pictures of my parents' cats. I can't keep pets in my current apartment, and I really appreciate getting cat pics from my parents (and visiting them twice a year and bothering the cats myself).

Spring / Summer warmth - I do not enjoy winter at all for several reasons, so I'm really enjoying the warmer weather we've had here recently. Even after a relatively mild winter, it's refreshing. Love being outside in the sun.

Teaching, when my students get it. I feel like I'm not a great teacher, but I do sometimes get to see that moment where my students connect the dots and really understand something, and that rules. I'm also realizing this relates back to #1 that I've listed here, but getting to see someone else experience it. I just like those moments a lot.

Video games. It wouldn't be right for me to not list something I'm really passionate about (when I have time). Love games and how people experience them (hence, why I watch Twitch).

Seeing the cool art people post here. I’ve never had the patience with myself to practice and to push through the “I suck” phase of making art, so I really appreciate seeing what others create.

I'm not going to tag anyone, because I'd feel a bit awkward doing so, but feel free to do this if you see it.

#@seimsisk #thank you for tagging me!#also I still have your ask from a while back #I promise I haven't forgotten and will answer it #hopefully soon #I had originally planned on answering it after I published or at least submitted something I'm working on #but that has taken months longer than I anticipated #I'm so sorry for not answering it but I will

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thetruthaboutnolan · 4 months

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WERE YOU ON LUNAR COVE?

I had to look up what that was and when I saw the group my immediate reaction was ‘ohh this place, hell nah.’ I remember checking it out some time last year and being interested and then looked at the species page, didn’t care for it, and just forgot all about it. Checking it out now, I see it has a trigger list, nope, not for me. And looking into their recent unfollows I’m already assuming someone got kicked out because the staff got harassed it ‘was me’ as that’s happened a lot in the past. Jack Fah…. Whatever, hate that guy never use him. And the other was Gabriel Basso, hot Night Agent guy…… he’s tatted and hairy…… I hate both of those things and actively don’t use resources of the face claims I do have that have them displayed or photoshop them out. But a whole arm sleeve? Way too much work to edit out. And his only resources are the same 6 scenes from the show giffed over and over. I already did a face claim that had only one source for gifs and while I loved that face. It got bored using him as I’d just keep using the same gifs over and over. You think I’d do the same with one with even less for variety? Ok

So sorry @lunarcovehq and werewolf guy (looks like they deleted their blog), you guys are just the most recent victims of the psychopath that is targeting me. Yes, it’s one person who has a habit of pretending to be multiple people at once and sending themselves anons. And she is pissy that I ultimately got ‘the man’ in our little ship war in the end. Hopefully you guys recover and have a great time after this nonsense because trust me, this girl is psycho. I’m talking pretending to be a dead friend, stealing and posting pics from facebooks of family members of someone she thinks I am, and threatening to have rolled up at their houses. Very likely a lie but the fact they thought it was ok to do that and post that shit?…. And she tries to say I’m problematic? HAaaaaaaaaa.

THE TRIGGERS STUFF?

Preemptively doing this one as I know those that don’t know me don’t know my actual opinion on them. It’s a well known fact I hate the whole ‘triggers’ thing. And don’t really believe in it in the way tumblr uses them. Do I have triggers? Yes, do I respect others people? I respect they have them, do I believe it’s stupid? Yep.

Yes, when you bring my triggers into play it does upset me but its effects have been less and less over the years. I don’t care to run and completely avoid them. It’s better to face them and deal with them in a healthy way so they don’t have power over you anymore. Running from them isn’t going to do anything for you and the world itself isn’t going to protect you from them so toughen the hell up. A lot of people don’t even use them properly. A good chunk of the people that are the ‘MaH TrIgGeRs!!!!’ Type use it as an evolution of the ‘mAh AnXiEtY’ and those people only brought that nonsense up when they got called out for their crap. Turned calling them on their own shit into a traumatic effect on them….. you got caught, cut the dramatics. Others don’t know what a trigger is.

A lot of these times they are actually just fears someone has, they are afraid of that thing. Triggers are trauma based. That’s why my triggers are rape, incest, and making fun of/under playing someone mental illnesses. I’ve been raped, twice, once by a related authority figure. And one of my grandmas and tumblr have underplayed/selectively forgotten about/made fun of my mental illnesses and my suicide attempts. Would I check out these blogs who have recently and in the past made fun of my mental illnesses? Or who openly said I deserved to be raped or that call me a failure for not properly killing my self? No, they are toxic and unsafe and I would never encourage putting oneself let alone myself in that situation. Would I have someone else screencap and archive it , then spend 30 minutes or more ugly crying while telling myself no one deserves those things because I have to relive those painful times, then slowly spread it around that this person says someone deserved to be raped and was a failure for failing at killing themselves? Then spread the image and archive? Yes.

DOES PEOPLE BEING CALLED YOU HAPPEN A LOT?

Why do you think I’m suddenly like 6 different people now according to my psycho fan? YES!!!

And it’s normally over the dumbest thing. Like I once had a witch character whose last name was O’calahan which I literally took from a bridge from GTA3. Then someone in a different group of the same genre would have a character with the name Calahan who maybe was on the same show one time that the face claim I was using was on. And that group would get harassed as it was obviously me and they had to kick me. Blah blah.

Hell I even compared the bingo card for ‘obviously Nolan’ and all the generic ‘has to be him’s were basically marked.

1) did they mention anywhere especially in their application a name I used for any character I ever had.

2) is the face claim attractive, muscled, and has good hair?

3) did the character have a job that matches their species? Example: most of my werewolves were cops, military, or hunters. All of these things have a pecking order and structure like a pack, and they all have some way to work with aspects of a werewolf. Aggression, hunting, fighting, puffing out their chests crap etc etc.

4) do they say anything I normally do. I say ello a lot and I’ve been told people get sus to others when they say it as ello is apparently unique to me.

5) does their writing in any way big or small reflect mine? This one made me laugh about the latest guy. I had to chase down his posts on other blogs then compare it to mine…….. girl, his writing shits on mine. Like this is a person who sits with a Thesaurus next to them as they type. That’s someone who doesn’t need to run it through grammar 2 times to make sure it makes sense and is readable. He’s used a lot of commas like I do, way more though.

It’s a stretch and takes many mental gymnastics to pull off. However, it seems stalkers that attack you over everything don’t care

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