I ultimately apologize. instead of being a slime axolotl, I will turn into a propaganda machine. The transformation was delayed but it was always inevitable:

#SnifferSweep

Survey #436

from a couple days ago again; still don’t feel like rewriting any answers.

Do you own many pairs of shorts? I don't own any. Have you ever taken a close up shot of a flower? A hell of a lot; I love doing that. Have you ever wanted to get drunk and get your mind off everything? Yup. But I don't like hard alcohol and only really drink light fruity stuff, and I'm apparently no lightweight, so I got to the point I just really didn't want to drink anymore. Anything you might be giving up on soon? I have felt very, very hopeless with photography lately that sometimes I'm tempted. I don't think I will, but... it's hard. When was the last time you changed your picture on Facebook? It's been months. Have you ever painted a piece of furniture? Yes, actually. I helped Jason paint his shelf black. Do you have a favorite quote? No. Have you ever made a business card for yourself? No, but I have thought about it. I just really don't have nearly enough popularity among the local photographers to feel like I really need to design one. Did you love playing hide and seek as a kid? YES. I loved it. Are there any recipes you have memorized? No. Do you know your multiplication times tables? ... no lmao Have you ever been severely burned? Not severely, no. Did you ever dream that you had a baby? I actually have more than once. What was the weirdest thing you ever saw cross the road? I think a turkey? Are you good at coming up with jokes? God no. Where do you prefer to sit when you catch the bus? When I used to ride home with Jason from school, we always sat way in the back. Do you ever listen to music to fall asleep to? No. I did when I was younger, though. I went through a loooong phase of sleeping with my iPod. If your parents... or anybody else... found your cell phone, would they be horrified at any of the messages in your inbox/outbox? No. Do you get offended if someone repeatedly checks their mobile phone when you’re out for lunch or dinner? That's very rude. What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard somebody say recently? Anti-vaccination bullshit from my stepmother. :^) Think about the last person you kissed - was it the very first time that you kissed them? No. When you drink alcohol with friends, do you play drinking games? We never did. Do you believe that there are certain circumstances where cheating is okay? Nope. Who was the last person to call you? My psychiatrist. What food disgusts you the most? Things like sashimi and caviar. I also think rare meat like steak, especially when it's still bloody, is absolutely disgusting. I could go on and on about this, 'cuz I think a lot of food is really gross. One place you would never want to get lost in in the dark? The jungle. Yikes. So many dangerous creatures, so claustrophobic, and with the canopy, I'd assume it'd be EXTREMELY dark. And it rains so much in the jungle, so it'd be hard to hear danger approaching. One thing that always creeps you out? Perhaps #1 is seeing an unborn baby move from outside their mother's stomach. I will fucking scream and want to puke. If you could be roommates with anyone of your choice, who would you pick? SARA!!!!!!!!! Omfg I'd LOVE to have her as my roommate. We've actually talked about the possibility, but that's nowhere near set in stone. What is the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever heard? In light of recent events, a high contender is shit like "vaccines cause autism." Would you rather be buried or cremated when you die? I'd strongly prefer to be cremated. What is your favorite food around the holidays? Spiral honey ham, for one. I love Christmas treats like chocolate-covered peanuts, fudge, cookies, etc. etc... Tell me about the greatest prank you’ve ever pulled? I don't pull pranks. If you could have the power to cast any kind of spell, what kind of spell would you cast? Maybe enchanting the human population to not be such violent and hateful fucks??? Have you ever gotten a flu vaccination? Only for Covid. Double dates: a do or don’t? They are SO fun, but I do feel like it's good to have individual ones, too. Do you know any guitarists? Yes. My old friend Tommy actually plays the electric guitar in a band, and Juan was really good at it, too. How do you feel about full-length beards? They look good on some people. It varies with everyone. Do you have any relatives that have shunned you, or vice versa? Not currently. My half-sister stopped talking to me many years ago when I was a homophobic fuck, and I don't blame her. We're perfectly cool now! Has anyone ever posted a HORRIBLE picture of you for everyone to see? omg no Does/did your high school have pop machines? Yes. Have you ever gambled? Nah. If you could work at any retail store, which one would it be? I am NEVER working retail again. I can't handle it. What’s the name of the last cat you pet? Roman. :') Have you ever stringed green beans before? Yes, actually, with Colleen's in-laws. They had a big garden that I helped tend to sometimes. I absolutely hated it with how sweaty I got even then, it was WAY too hot, and my body was also weak back then to where bending down was extremely painful. I just never wanted to say no. Have you ever had any painful dental work done? If so, what? No. What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re bored? It really depends on what I feel like doing, but I think playing World of Warcraft tempts me most often when I'm unbearably bored. What did you watch today? I've just been rewatching Mortem3r play Monster Hunter World. That game looks soooo fun, I wanna try it. ;-; True or False: Yoshi is the cutest dinosaur ever? No. I adore dinosaurs and dinosaur media, so I could name a lot if I thought long enough. Who is the last person you spent money on? My niece. I still feel awful I didn't buy Ryder a gift by myself; I just could NOT decide what to get him. I'm very thankful that Mom let me use one she got him as "mine." They were bright, light-up golf balls, and he loooooved them. What is your relationship like with various members of your family? I have a biiig extended family, man, so I'll try to keep this as brief as possible. I am EXTREMELY close to my mom, like there is no way I'd be alive without her, and her support for me seems endless somehow. I love my dad very much too, but I don't see him nearly as much as I wish I did. He tries to support me however he's capable, and he always lets me know that he's there if I need him for anything. I love, am very proud of, and look up to my two sisters, but I'm also very envious of them and how they are successful adults with direction and big accomplishments. We are very different, so we have difficulty with really bonding and talking about things regularly, and it really makes me feel like a terrible sister. My nieces and nephew are absolute diamonds to me, and I'm especially close to Ash's oldest daughter Aubree. She and I are very similar in a lot of areas, so I really relate to her, even in her young age. Ryder really seems to like me, and I love that little rascal, too. :') My youngest niece Emerson is still only a baby, so she can't really communicate in words yet, but she is still a beautiful darling that I'd protect with my life in not even a blink. That covers who I consider my "immediate" family, really, at least that I see regularly. What’s something you disagree with about the way you were raised? I am very firmly against spanking, but my parents did it. I think since Ash's kids were born though, Mom's opinion changed on it. It was around that time, I know. She won't lay a hand on them. Who was the last person to add you as a friend on Facebook? I have no clue, actually. Who was the last person that asked if you were okay? *shrug* The last time you were in a car, who was driving? My mom. Did you ever get into a bar and drink before you were 21? Never tried. What countries have you been to? I've never left the U.S. Honestly, is that car insured? I don't have my own car. What do you think about gay marriage? I vigorously support it. Do you like Carrie Underwood? I actually do. She has a beautiful voice. How far away do you live from your parents? I live with my mom. Idk how far I am from Dad, really... but not THAT far. How do you like your steak cooked? Medium well. Have you ever been to Mount Rushmore? No, and I don't want to. It is absolute vandalism. Where is your favorite place (that you have actually been to)? Chicago blew me away, but I think it's just because it was SO foreign to me. I actually don't like cities very much, but for a brief visit, I thought it was very cool. Do you believe places can really be haunted? Yes. Do you take anti-depressants? Sleeping pills? No. I took anti-depressants for I think most of my life, and they did nothing for me. Come to learn from the doctor who actually set my meds straight that anti-depressants for people with bipolarity do nothing but aggravate the symptoms of bipolarity, and I was living evidence. I take mood stabilizers for said disorder instead. I don't take sleeping pills; none seem to work for me. What’s your favourite brand of peanut butter? Maybe Skippy? Idk, I'm not very picky with pb. What’s your favourite Lunchables meal? The nachos one. How many languages can you recite the alphabet in? Two. Do you like Bob Marley? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I can't stand his voice. Have you ever eaten at Golden Corral? Yeah, but I'm not a fan. Buffets gross me out. Do you sit and eat dinner at the same table with your family? We very rarely sit at the table. Have you been working hard to achieve something lately? If not, what was the last thing you worked hard to achieve? Losing weight, yes. I am honestly trying so hard at the gym, like to the point I've almost fallen many times as well as been overtaken by incredible nausea a lot. I don't feel like I'm over-working, necessarily, just working my ass off. Do you use ice cubes in your fountain drinks? No, because it waters the drink down and I hate it. Would you ever want your very own library, or do you not read enough for it to be worth it? No. I don't read nearly enough, and besides, can you imagine all the dust? What site did you originally start doing surveys on? I actually don't know... Have you ever used something other than water to make ice cubes? What did you do with them? I've actually never thought to do that. Would you ever willingly experience life temporarily without sight, hearing, or any of your other senses, simply to know what it is like? Fuck no. I would go insane. In what ways are you very judgmental? I'll judge the fuck out of rapists, child molesters, pedophiles, people like that with no goddamn shame. But your average person, I try not to judge very much. What is your main problem in life right now? It's hard to determine my main problem, honestly. There are a lot of issues going on in my life that've just piled up into one big tangled mess. Do your “favourites” change often? Definitely not. I've had the same favorites in so many topics for forever. Have you ever read a biography on someone? I've read Ozzy's autobiography, and I also read the Some Kind of Monster Metallica book, which was written by I want to say St. Anger's musical director? This was a very long time ago, and honestly, I thought it was pretty boring, so my memory is faint. You learned quite a bit about the band in his time with them, but damn, I don't care about the musical director al;skdfal;we. Do you know anyone who has ever been in a movie? Who and what movie were they in? What was their part? Not to my knowledge. I have an acquaintance who's had minor acting roles, but I don't believe she's ever been in a film. When was the last time you brought a pet to the vet? What was wrong with it? I want to say around two years ago (probably less) when we got my cat neutered. Have you ever made your way through a corn maze? No.

After so long the first “chapter” is finally here! :’D This will hopefuly be a short illustrated novel series. The story takes place before the events of Borderlands 3. I would never be able to make this without the help of my sweet friend @border-spam who provided my with so much support, great ideas, inspiration and with her help to rewrite this. Actually it’s kind of colaboration of me, my man and her. Since my man helped with rewriting too. Huge Thanks to them because without them editing it, I would never post it. <3  . . . Usually, this would have been resolved in just a few minutes. Having a team of his own technicians to take care of streaming issues was surely one of his greatest ideas. He still has to check up on them directly every so often, mostly for his own assurance that everything is running smoothly, but today, what should have been a quick check in was taking longer because some idiot meat sack follower had damaged some streaming equipment. Because of that dumbass, Troy has been left trying to get this tech repaired and the stream online before Tyreen loses her patience with the delay. Luckily, one of his most trusted editors was around to help him with cable replacement.

Troy sits in front of the monitor array, nervous as time ticks on, bouncing his leg while impatiently watching the little symbol on the monitor in front of him, waiting for it to signal the connection is back ON. His ECHO’s screen next to him updates with new pings so quickly it’s constantly lit, that’s how often his Godly sister is messaging him, and each new blip and ping from the echo makes him even more frustrated.. but he tries his absolute best to keep it inside, and not to aim his inner anger at the girl that has offered him help.

She’s the one currently sat under the desk beneath him, expertly fixing the cables running under it. A hugely welcome help, considering he’d never be able to fit under it to try himself.

Tinkers are best for these kind of repairs, smaller hands able to quickly handle finicky tech, able to get into places he can’t because of his height. His editor isn’t exactly a Tink, but you could easily mistake her as one due to her small size.

Just as he feels himself ready to snap, Tyreen’s constant pings and the delay on the stream causing his frustration to reach boiling point, a victorious laugh erupts from her under the desk. “AH-HA! YESSS!”

The symbol on the monitor finally turns green, and his scowl shifts into a genuine smile. “Helllll yeah, we are live baby!” His left arm quickly works the keyboard, testing the stream tech and getting it set up, until a gentle tap on his knee breaks his concentration.

“Umm, it’s not like I don’t enjoy the fabulous view from between your legs… but could you please let me out?” Her soft voice pleads from under the table.

He smirks, and pushes his chair back just enough to make her think she is free, but instead hunches down, looking under at her with his trademark shit-eating grin.

“I don’t know Ari, can I? Honestly, I really like you being down the-” he is interrupted as his face is gently pushed away by a really small hand. As soon as he shifts backwards, she crawls out and dusts off her jeans while giving her God a playful smile.

Any other cultist would pay with their life for daring to touch the God King like this, but she’s somehow special to him. Maybe it could even be called a friendship of some kind. Or at least, that’s how he sees their whole relationship. They’ve worked together almost every day for three years, and as the years passed he’s found himself talking to her, enjoying her company, choosing to be around her..  but Troy is too busy running the cult to have time for real friendships, and the only people he spends any time with besides his sister are the people in his editing team.

It’s a rare thing for him to find someone like her, someone who isn’t just a bloodthirsty idiot screeching psychotically. Someone who actually has enough brain cells to have a real conversation. That what drew him to his little friend over time. She does, of course, respect him as a God, but she does treat him.. differently. Something that feels almost like those fleeting nice moments he shares with Tyreen sometimes, facades forgotten every once in a while. His God King persona really dislikes that this woman dares to treat him like anything less than a deity, but the lonely man inside of him secretly wishes she’d do it more. It’s a kind of closeness he craves desperately.

He returns the grin and stands up, ready to leave. “Nice! Now we can finally start the stream!”. His Echo lights up one more showing Tyreen’s name again, and he curses under his breath and picks it up, bracing himself to answer the onslaught of messages. While he begins to text his sister, he notices his friend silently standing to his side, staring. Staring at his chest, to be exact. Staring so intensively she’s paused in her tracks and not left yet.

Many people stare at Troy, and for many reasons. Cultists stare in adoration and respect, the “civilised” assholes he spends unwanted time around stare in disgust, but she’s staring in a different way, and that’s why it’s sparked so much curiosity in him.

She doesn’t notice he’s completely aware of her awe as he breaks the silence. “Heh, I know it’s really hard not to get a good eyeful sweetie, but don’t forget to blink every once in a while.” he purrs.

Again, just as before, his attempt to fluster her doesn’t work. Maybe that is why he enjoys being near her so much, she isn’t as easily controlled as everyone else, and he’s noticed over time that she actually does have a couple of similar tricks as his up her sleeves as well.

She looks up at him and he’s almost insulted by her perfectly controlled expression, feigning complete boredom, like his last line hadn’t even landed. “I wasn’t staring, I was wondering.”

“Where.. did you even get those tattoos?”

Now she really has his attention. “The guys who tattoo the psychos are really terrible at it, but yours look actually, well, professional.” His ECHO keeps beeping and flickering, frantically alerting him that he should have left and been on stream, but this little rascal just hit a real sweet spot, and there is no way he’s going to leave right now.

The urge to smile was too strong, and he lets out a soft laugh as she continues to look up at him, so confident and relaxed in his presence despite being barely taller than his navel. Even without realising it, she just appreciated his work. He’s the artist behind the iconic Calypso tattoo on his chest. It was a long process he’d taken his time with after coming to loath the shitty arm tattoos he got from some jackhole years ago. He’d stopped trusting others to tattoo him and taken up the craft himself. The skull on his shoulder was the only older one that looked at remotely decent even before the siren tattoos burned right through it, and he was grateful the rest had been burned through badly over time.

He puts his hand around his hip and pushes his coat aside, leaning back to stretch the taught lines of muscle across his inked abdomen and chest to give her a better look.

“Well that’s because they were done by a professional, not some scumfuck idiot. Why so curious about it anyway, sweets?” He croons, enjoying the way she shifts on her feet slightly.  “You fancy on gracing that little body with some art yourself? Maybe something to honor and please your God?”

Using this moment to her advantage, she dares to take a step nearer to him to get a better look at the tattoos. From a closer look, it’s clear that it’s been a while since he’d gotten them, the ink slightly faded against his warm coffee toned skin. The most interesting design is of course the skull that’s hidden behind the hanging chains around his neck, and she wants a better look at it.

Pushing her boundaries yet again, she slowly reaches towards them and carefully shifts them out of the way, gently brushing her fingers against his skin in the process. It would be easy to miss how his breath hitches a little when she touched him, or how goosebumps blossom across his chest, but she was way to close to not notice. He glares intensely at the top of her head, glare burning right through her, and even though she doesn’t look at him, she feels it.

When she finally lifts her head to look into his sapphire eyes, she swears she notices a hint of blush on his cheeks above the wolfish grin. Against her will, the corners of her mouth turn up into a smile. God King Calypso is a very interesting mess of a man once you start to see past the act he plays for most people. Though he is extremely confident and intimidating on the outside, she’s started to suspect that inside hides a shy little boy. Even still, regardless of those slightly red cheeks, he never loses that aura of danger, and she’s nervously aware that she is playing with fire right now..

Why is he so proud of this tattoo? She’s only seen him act like this around something he’s responsible for. Maybe it’s the skull and the rest of the design… He is the creator of almost all of the propaganda art the COV uses, so it wouldn’t really be surprising if he had designed his own tattoos, would it? She crosses her arms in front of her chest and perks an eyebrow as she considers how to respond.

“Yeah… I would love to get some nice tattoos as well, but I don’t trust any of those psychotic bastards to get remotely close to me, let alone touch me…”

“Maaaybe the artist that tattooed you could give me a hand and help me out with mine?“

It’s not a secret that the God King despises bandits. They are below him, and many of the bastards had been killed just for getting too close to his liking. The only reason her and the Tinkers aren’t ever reduced to steaming piles of viscera for daring to interact with him is because they are useful, smart. Of course he wouldn’t let any of those bandit idiots do this tattoo… which means the person tattooing him has to be someone at least modestly sane, someone she could trust. Thats exactly what she’s looking for, since avoiding bandits in general is the best decision regardless.

She notices how much her last question has pleased him… His smug smile grows unnaturally wide, the amount of teeth starting to show is giving her a bad feeling in her guts, and she swallows nervously before be finally replies.

“You want the artist to help out with yours? Oh surrrre I can.” he rumbles triumphantly, and she feels her stomach drop as she realises what’s just happened.

“Finding the right canvas for my art is never easy, but I’m very interested in working on yours.” Her eyes widen further as he leans down to her so that predatory grin fills her vision, just so he can enjoy her surprise from up close.

Now she finally understands why he was so pleased. So eager to discuss this. So happy to play along. Not only did he design his tattoos, he tattooed them as well.

This wasn’t what she wanted at all. It was fine to chat with him about some tech or shared interested when he was in a good mood, but the God King was still a power she did not want to play with. She could get burned, badly, even when she knows he doesn’t hurt anyone from his team as long as they are obedient and respectful.

She desperately tries to get out of this fast. “Ah.. um.. well.. I didn’t really decide on any design yet, I really need to get that right first!” Convincing as that sounds, he navigates around it instantly, too clever to let her slip out of his grasp so easily.

“Oh no problem, I can design something great for you, that wouldn’t be a problem at all.” She swears his eyes are burning through her as her cheeks redden. “Oh, um, I was actually thinking about getting a piercing first, for a start?” his smile grows wider. “After all these years spent here, I don’t even have my ears pierced. The holes grew back together, maybe that would be a good start..”

This is exactly why she doesn’t like being alone with him. He’s so good with words, twisting situations to his own benefit. A sly snake, he does anything he can to get what he wants, and he always gets what he wants…

The ECHO in his hand beeps again, giving her a moment of hope, but he ignores it completely, all attention on the shaking woman he’s got trapped in his coils.

“Well lucky you! I’m really experienced with both tattoos AND piercings!” Now it really is too late, he has her trapped, cornered by her own words. He’d picked up on her twisting and changing her opinions just to try and get out of this, and made sure he was a step ahead of her each time.

“Come to my workshop tomorrow morning the same time you normally start work, we can… hmm…  map out some ideas together.”

“See you later Ari.”

A cocky wink later and he finally leaves the room, leaving the poor girl standing there hopeless….

Primeval Playlist

Title: Primeval Playlists  Timeframe: Varies.  I’m pretty sure they were all written for Season One and Two though, since Sarah is mentioned a lot instead of Jess. (I love Jess.)  Pairing: Becker/Abby Rating: K+ Author’s Note: This is a rewrite of an old story from high school, maybe college.  I finally, after years of trying, got access to my old work.  I didn’t think I would do anything with them, just wanted to have them.  However, I think I am going to rewrite and improve the ones I liked.  I’m pretty sure this was probably one of those iTunes shuffle challenges where you only have the length of the song to write a little drabble. 

1. St. Patrick's Day- John Mayer

Becker smiles, seeing the name pop up on his ringing phone.  “Hello, Abby.” “Hey, Beck.  It’s snowing.” He can hear the smile in the woman’s voice and makes his way over the window of his little flat.  He peeps through his blinds to see big white snowflakes fall onto the patio below outside.  “Oh, it is.”

“You promised me a walk the next time it snowed.” Ah, there it is, he thinks.  He hates the cold.  He knows his girlfriend loves the snow.  They’ve had many a conversation on it.  It’s one of their many disagreements that she insists balances them out and makes them perfect for one another. 

“It’s freezing out,” he protests, shivering a little involuntarily at the thought of being out in it. 

“I’m sure we can think of someway to warm up after.  You promised, and it’s Christmas Eve Eve.  I want a romantic walk around in the snow with you.  Besides, you don’t really want to be alone tonight do you?” 

Becker lets out a long sigh, grabs his coat and gloves from the rack, and pulls his beanie over his head. “I’ll come get you. We can walk down to the park near you.  I’ll be there in ten.”  “Promise me something, Beck?”  He’s making sure he has his wallet and keys, grabbing the little box from the drawer near the door, letting out a soft ‘mh-hm’ in approval. He was planning on waiting until tomorrow, but it just seemed right to bring it with him tonight.   “We’ll make it to St. Patrick’s Day, yeah?” 

Becker pulls the phone away from his ear and stares at it for a moment, shaking his head with a roll his eyes. “What are you getting, Abs?” 

He can hear her hesitation on the other side the line as she gathers her own things.  “It’s silly.  Don’t laugh.  Of course we will make it to New Year’s, and you’re not cruel enough to break things off right before Valentine’s Day.  St. Patrick’s day is next.” 

Gods, he loves this woman.  “I promise you all St. Patrick’s Days.  How’s that?” 

“I love you.” “I love you too.  I’ll be there soon,” he tells her, hanging up the phone, locking the door being him, and patting the pocket of his jacket to assure the ring box was safely nestled there. 

2. Can't Get Me Down- Lo Ball

Abigail Maitland had yet to meet a man that could get her down. She was the epitome of tough and had long sense mastered the art of putting up walls.  Not to say she didn’t care for the men she dated.  She did.  It just never really got to her when things ends, or rather when she ended things. She always met an expired relationship with the same independent, never gonna get me down attitude.  It should have been the same with Becker.  She knew that. She should have been upset for a day or two then been back to business as usual, watching movies and playing video games with Connor like it was nothing by the end of the week.  That’s what was supposed to happen. For some reason though, when it came to Becker, that’s not how it did go. She cried for weeks.  She shut everyone out.  She wouldn’t even allow Connor in, outside of work, to cheer her up.  No amount of drinks or ice cream or kicks to her punching bag could help her realize what was so different about the captain to get her down like that .

3. Cool Thing- Rascal Flatts

Abby joined the ARC for a number of different, valid reasons.  She was thrilled for the once in a lifetime opportunity to research the creatures that come through the anomalies. She looked forward to helping same creatures in any way that she could.  Hell, she joined so she could finally do something adventurous with her life.  She never thought that she’d find her biggest adventure there.  Or rather, she did, just not in the same way. She never thought that she would find love within her very own team, and she most certainly did not expect to the captain to be the one she fell for. She’d never been the type to go crazy for a guy in uniform.  More often than not, she found them too up tight with not enough sense of humor.  Becker though, he was everything she wasn’t expecting to find. 

4. Everlasting Friend- Blue October

Never, in his over thirty years in life, had Becker ever gotten the crazy increase of heartbreak and sporadic butterflies in his stomach, that some many people, movies, and books alluded to. He had never been in love, and he quite honestly didn’t believe he ever would.  He’d grown up being taught that love was a sign of weakness.  It made you act like a fool, his father would tell him.  In his job, that wasn’t an option.  Any distractions could put a mission at risk.  All that changed when he met Abby.  He couldn’t tell you exactly why she was different. He wasn’t sure of it was her strength, her wit, or her natural beauty, that really did him in.  When he was with her, his confidence spiked.  He gave her a new type of strength that no amount of training could achieve. She taught him how to see the world through her optimistic view.  She taught him friendship.  She taught him everlasting love. 

5. I'm Not Gonna Teach Him How to Dance with You- Kate Nash (originally by Black Kids)

“No,” he said flatly over his beer, glaring at the woman on the other side of the table from him. The blonde’s face face fell.  “Please, Becks,” she begged.  “Just teach him to dance.  You’re a beautiful dancer, and he’s…not. I just want to be able to dance with him at Sarah’s wedding without him making a fool of us in front of everyone.” 

“I’m not teaching Connor how to dance with you,” Becker told her, his tone final. He shook his head a few times, muttering what she thought sounded like “not doing it” for added measure. 

Abby took a sip of her beer, and let out a long sigh.  “Why not?” 

Becker stared at her for a moment, realizing if he was waiting for the perfect time to admit his feelings, that was it.  “Why would I want to teach another man to dance with the woman I’m in love with?” 

She froze so suddenly she nearly spilled the drinks in front of her, unable to curb the smile that spread across her face.  She reached across the table to cover his hand that was resting there with his own.  “We just need one dance together as the Maid of Honor and the Best Man. After that, I promise all the other dances will be yours.” 

“Fine,” he huffs, squeezing her hand, and switching their positions so he can lace his fingers though hers. 

“Thank you,” she smiles, using their entangled hands to pull him forward so she can lean over the table to capture his lips in a kiss.  “It took you long enough.” 

6. I Run to You- Lady Antebellum

There were many things in life that Abigail Maitland ran from.  She ran from hate.  she ran from prejudice and pessimist, she ran from various monsters that had long since gone extinct.  However, she always ran to the same thing… Becker. When the world got a little bit too much for her to handle she knew she was safe going to him. A year ago, Connor would have been the one she’d run to.  The one that would hold her while she hid her tears and mourned the death of another creature, or another passerby that they weren’t in time to save.  Connor wasn’t the most important person in her life now, though.  Becker was.  Becker was the reason why she got up even on the mornings it was too much, and marched herself in the ARC building, even when she wanted to tell Lester and his formalities to shove it.  Becker was the reason she tried the girl thing again, even though he assured her he loved her no matter what she wore, even if those heels did do something to him. He was the reason her heart pounded each and every time he came within her sight.  Becker was the reason no other man would ever seem like enough.  Becker was the one that Abby had fallen in love with, the one that she would always run to, no matter the problem. 

7. Masquerade- Phantom of the Opera

The soft white feathers tickled her face as Abby straitened the slightly too loose mask.  She scanned the crowd for the simple black mask that she knew Becker had donned right before they arrived, refusing to wear it on the ride over. She saw Connor in his shiny gold mask, whispering over in partially hidden corner with Sarah. Abby was a little jealous of the sequined make up that the woman had perfectly applied in a swirling pattern around her eyes and over her.  Part of her wishes she had thought of that.  She had just spotted a tall red feathered mask spinning across that dance floor that could only belong to Jenny, when she felt someone snake their arms around her waist from behind.  She let out a startled gasp before leaning into the familiar touch. “Abby,” Becker whispered in her ear, placing a soft kiss on her neck.  “I have an idea.” 

“Oh, what’s that?” she asked, turning to face him, and taking in how glorious he looked in his perfectly tailored tuxedo she’d helped him pick out just for the occasion. 

“We should get married.” 

Abby stopped fiddling with his bow tie, and flattened her hands against his chest. “What?” she barely managed to whisper out. 

Becker pulled a cherry wood box out of his pocket, opened it to expose the simple, yet gorgeous ring resting inside, and took one of her hands in his.  “Will you marry me?” 

She nodded her head several times, grinning like mad, “Yes! Of course!” 

He slid the ring on her finger, before scooping her up in his arms and spinning them both around. Neither could contain the laughter that bubbled out of them until he captured her lips in a deep kiss. 

8. Stay- Sugarland

Becker closed the door of their shared flat quietly behind, in hopes of not waking Abby.  He flicked on the front light, surprised to see her wide awake on the couch, clearing waiting for him. 

“Where’ve you been Beck?” she asked him, his tone flat and harsh.  

“Extra training with some of the new guys,” he told her with an inquisitive smile. “I told you I’d be late.  You didn’t have to wait up.” He made his way across the living room to place a kiss on her cheek. 

She leaned away, tears filling her eyes.  “Didn’t know Sarah was joining the military branch of the team.”

Becker stepped back and let out a long sigh, rubbing the back of his head.  “Abby, I-”

Abby shook her head. “Save it, Becker. Do you really think she loves you? Like I do?  You think she truly cares for you and isn’t just looking for a quick shag to make up for Danny?”

“I’m so sorry, Abby,” he whispered.  He reached for her, pulling her into a hug.  She didn’t fight him, but didn’t immediately pull away either. 

“You choose right now, are you going to be spending the rest of your nights in her bed or mine?” she shakily whimpered into his chest. 

“What?” She pulled away from him, walking across the other side of the room and crossed her arms over her chest finally turning back to him with deep breath after a moment. “Right.  Wrong answer. See, you keep choosing her.  You chose her the first moment you let your pants down. Then you chose her again every time you lied to me about training to do it again.  I’ve given you my best, yet she gets the best of you, and I’m not going to live this way.  It’s too painful.  So get out,” she told him harshly though her sobs.  

“Abs, no-” He reached for her yet again, but she shoved his arm away.  She chokes out another sob, throwing his keys at him.  He just barely managed to catch them before they hit him in the face.  “I said get out!” 

The captain let out another huff, knowing there wasn’t anything he could do to change her mind or make up for his actions at his point.  “I really am sorry.  I’ll come get my things tomorrow,” he whispered, defeated before gathering his wallet and phone back up and leaving.  

Abby waited until the door shut, before sinking down to the ground, grabbing a pillow, burying her face in at her body wracked with sobs.

9. Birds- Kate Nash

Abby set down her files with a lighthearted huff. “Alright, Becker, that is the fifth time that you’ve looked up at me like that since we’ve been here.  Tell me what you’re thinking?” 

The two sat at one of the metal tables in her lab, finishing up the paper work that Lester had assigned earlier that day.  The others were off in various offices with their own ‘torture buddies’ as they taken to call one another during those late night reports and debriefings. 

He took a moment to respond, just taking her in for an extra couple seconds tapping his pen on his stack of papers, as he considered what to say. “You know all these creatures.  They scare the shit out everyone because they can tear you to shreds in a heartbeat, but they are interesting and  beautiful and magnificent.  That’s  what am thinking, only about you.” 

“What are you talking about?” she laughed, confused. 

“You, Abby,” he told her, reaching across the folders and papers to take her hand. “You scare the shit out of me, because you mean so much to me, and I’m afraid every time we are out there that I’m going to lose you.”  There was softness to his tone that she had never heard before.

“Oh,” she blushed, ducking her head momentarily to hide her smile.  “Yeah, I - I feel the same way, Becker.” She squeezed the hand he still had ahold of, before going back to her paperwork.  She knew that if they didn’t get it done now, they never would, and Lester would never let them free. 

10. Boys with Girlfriends- Meiko

Abby rushed out of the storage closet, shaking the image of Becker and Sarah liplocked in between the towers of shelves.  She had to stop being friends with boys that had girlfriends already.  It never ended well for her.  She always ended up falling for them to some degree.  It was like a weird magnetic pull that attracted her to already committed men.  If she was being completely honest with herself, she was a little worried about that was said of her character.  It wasn’t like she actively pursued taken guys.  She just wanted to be friends.  She wasn’t supposed to fall for him. 

I’m not even sure if this fandom is still alive.  If you’re reading though, thank you.  Let me know what you think. There were a couple I wasn’t thrilled with, but because it was a rewrite, I didn’t want to get rid of them. 

Hugs,  Honey. 

2p’s less to more insecure and their biggest insecurities

Anonyme said :From a scale between 1 to 10, rate each 2P that's the most insecure of themselves and name each one that has the biggest insecurity they have.

Warning : The 2p’s are here classed from the more to the less insecure, according to their troubles and personalities. However, if they were in the real life, all of them would be very unstable because if I must class them according to a “normal person”, they all would be between 10 and 6 of instability. So, it’s not because some have a 1/10 that they are in the same state as a sane person. And more insecure is not more dangerous, some are at the bottom of the ranking and are more dangerous that some that are at the top. The ranking would be totally different if they would have been class depending on the dangerousness.

PS : Sorry for my bad english, I’m french...

2p!France (1/10) :

    Except that he suffers from a sort of depressive melancholy that makes him drink and smoke almost every time, François has no interest in killing or torturing; he hates that because it brings nothing to him and his legendary laziness push him to do the minimum. His couldn’t-give-a-damn attitude is his main trait; he doesn’t care about anything and nothing really have his interest. He might want to have experiences (mostly sexual ones), but even that does not really interest him. He’s maybe depressive, but he never complains about his life. He’s cold and detached and it brings him a good objective vision of others’ madness; but for that too, he doesn’t care.          

    Even if he does not care about anything, he’s still human – maybe old from hundreds of years, but still human – and feelings scared him. Not because it’s like a weakness like what thinks 2p!America, but more because he does not understand them and as a writer who analyze others and their feelings that he feels they unsettle him. He prefers to have an impartial vision of others, not like some sort of god, but more in order not to resemble the other nations from whom he feels very detached.  

2p!Spain (1/10) :        

    The only thing that we can reproach Andres is his love for swords and knives, which he makes a big collection in his cellar. If during his pirate period he was way more redoubtable, killing without mercy, he puts it on the madness of adolescence. When he grew up, he became, if not exactly a pacifist, at least less violent. He doesn’t kill, either torture anyone and doesn’t particularly enjoy hurting people. On the other hand, he’s very cold and grumpy, but far from mean and cruel. He yet perfectly knows how to handle fighting sword and this single capacity is enough to intimidate a potential opponent.  

    There isn’t much to which Andres is really attached to and his quite cold personality does not really tell if he feels insecure about anything. Perhaps he is afraid to fall again in his pirate period and to bring out again the violent and bloodthirsty side that every 2ps possess. He never accepted that he may be as crazier as the others, so fall back into violence scared him.  

2p!Canada (2/10) :

    Matt is quite calm most of the time, but behind this pacific appearance hides a really close combat expert. He sometimes goes to destroy faces from little rascals with his brother and his famous hockey stick, but that is not often. However, there is one thing for which Matt could become a real murderer; when he goes for a walk in the forest and he discovers hunters killing animals. He often goes out looking for them with his gun and he kills them, sometimes giving the rest to his bear Kuma.  

    Matt is a loner who lives far from men and their madness, shut away in the forest where he cuts wood and kills hunters. Then, his worst fear is precisely men and even worse the crowd. He suffers from a big ochlophobia which makes him panic if he finds himself in the middle of them. He never goes to the town, barely if he goes to the village near him to restock his fridge. But he never stays long in contact with other men. He’s a lonely wolf who prefers the tranquility of nature rather than human company. The only ones he manages to tolerate is his family.

2p!Germany (2/10) :

    Lutz is far away from the others’ mental troubles. He’s a joker, warm and franc character. At first sight, he seems very different from the others 2ps because almost every of them are crazy and murderer, but Lutz also has his inner demons. If he’s ordinary a very good person in the real life, when comes wars or crisis, he becomes particularly violent and cruel when it’s about defending himself. The torture is an activity he then really loves and he’s exceptionally good at it because incredibly inventive when he has to hurt someone.  

    If he’s creative about torture, he’s not a fine strategist and setting up attack plans are not in his ability. He’s more the big beefy fellow type who’s giving orders and execute them, even if he hates that. If he was smarter, he could be the brain, but that’s not the case he deplores that. He can’t stand people mocking him because of his lack of discernment and his ability to think. 

2p!Russia (3/10) :

    Viktor is quite sane compared to others. Well, at least, he wouldn’t kill unlike by accident or by absolute necessity. However, he’s quite capable of torturing if necessary and without qualms if it’s a stranger. He may carry a shovel everywhere, but it’s more to frighten people who want to attack him than to bury them. Yet, he still knows how to terribly hurt people when he needs to.  

    Viktor wouldn’t handle that someone finds out about his weaknesses. He doesn’t know them himself, he even ignored if he has any, but he would be scared that the other nations find out his weak points that they could use to kneel him. He always stays impassible in order to never show anything – but he doesn’t really have to force himself because he already doesn’t feel much- and so others can’t detect any flaw.  

2p!Sweden (3/10) :

    Bernard perfectly knows how to hide his true side behind a mask of kindness and a pretty smile. But in reality, he can be considered a Yandere, a bit like 2p!England, because he seems like a good person, but he has a psychotic and murderous personality. He’s particularly manipulative because he always wants to have the control of everything and he has a severe lack of empathy. However, he doesn’t kill often, but when he does, he loves to torture his victim before killing them.      

    Worse than can happen to Bernard could be that he loses all his landmarks. He’s a character that is very attached to his possessions, so much that he even gives names to them: Mr. Beefy for his leather couch, Aurora for his lamp, Kriskin for his favorite chair and even Thurston (2p!Finland’s name) for his bed. Equally, 2p!Finland is for him one of his dearest possessions because he wants him as his wife – even if the Finnish don’t think so. If all of these brutally disappear, Bernard would enter in a particularly brutally mentally outbreak.  

2p!America (4/10) :

    Allan is a street guy; street fights amuses him and he will sink in with pleasure, and often he’s the one starting them. He has a violent nature and he enjoys hitting other street guys, especially with his baseball bat covered with nails. It’s something very enjoyable for him. Apart from street fighting that allow him to unwind, he has some moments of anger, but never strong enough to hurt his family or friends.

    The thing that’s scares Allan the most is his feelings. Unlike his image of a tough guy he wants to show, he’s a great sentimental, as shown by his love for animals. He would like to be indifferent, but when it comes to his loved ones or people he really appreciates, he cannot help but to be concerned. His family is very important to him; 2p!France, 2p!England, 2p!Canada and his friends. Falling in love is the worst for him because he doesn’t know how to handle with his feelings. His sensitivity is his worst weakness.  

2p!Austria (4/10) :  

    Roland is more dangerous that he is unstable, at least, if we can affirm that being attract and use the occult and summoning is not a trait of instability. Indeed, the Austrian’s passion is dark magic and more exactly demons’ summoning for fun or to a precise goal. He’s a character who regularly frequent Satan. There is nobody is particularly close to, except 2p!Prussia he takes as his boyfriend, even if the one concerned is afraid of him. Thus, the only ones Roland really is with are beings from his spells and summoning.    

   Roland has no one to really cherish because he scares everyone around him and is not afraid of all dark and dangerous things, so he does not really have any insecurity. But he’s so accustomed to rubbing shoulders with the supernatural that he’s really afraid of everything that can be called “normal”. He’s incapable to live like the others with a simple, ordinary lifestyle and he trembles at the idea of going shopping or talking with someone on the street. He’s socially awkward and tends to scare everyone with his sharped teeth and his red eyes.    

2p!Denmark (5/10) :

    From all of the 2ps, Markell must be the healthiest. He’s a good warrior, but doesn’t feel any pleasure when killing and he’s even disgusted about it. If he could, he would rewrite his past in order to erase his mistakes. Like 2p!France, he feels relatively detached from the others 2ps because he knows he isn’t like them and refuses to be like them. It must be the reason he smokes marijuana, to escape from this crazy world where almost every nation are bloodthirsty murderers that want to hurt for fun. But he’s far from all this and he would like to live in the 1p world rather than here, but that’s unfortunately impossible.

    His biggest insecurity is his own world; the 2ps’ world disgusts him and he would like to escape it. He already asked his 1p if he can go on the 1p world, but Matthias refused, it’s impossible. Then, Markell tries a lot of other ways to flee by smoking for example. He fears the night when he would be awake by one of the nations and being murdered by stabbing or die from poisoning during a meeting.        

2p!Japan (5/10) :

    Kuro embodies all Japan’s worst actions, including Pearl Harbor and the invasion of China by the Japanese where they did a lot of heinous slaughter (Nanking massacre for example) during the WWII, and for which 2p!Japan hasn’t presented any excuses. He’s merciless, he kills in cold blood and according to what his twisted honor dictate to him. He’s not afraid of killing and torturing when his nation go to war. He’s heartless, dangerous and powerful when he wants to.

    A little bit like 2!Finland, he could not stand to see his country lose a war and be besiege. However, unlike Thurston, who only fear 2p!Russia, Kuro sees potential enemies in every other nations. His country is an island, so it’s more difficult to invade, so he counts on his nation’s power to intimidate the others, especially western countries. Defeat is not an option for him, particularly after all the slaughters he did and that could create in his enemies a desire of revenge and a humiliation as horrible as he had done.

2p!South Italy (6/10) :

    Flavio isn’t neither the type of killing often and if, without enjoyment. Like 2p!China, he kills only if the person is a threat, especially for him or his brother. He tries not to be very implied in his brother’s business, but he still is his second in command as a Mafiosi. He perfectly uses drugs to poison his victims and sometimes uses knives, but it’s rare. He also could have some Yandere traits towards the person he loves, that is to say 2p!Spain that makes him follow him everywhere and always asking for him.    

    For him, his body is own essence. If it were to be damaged in any way, Flavio would never recover. He’s almost at the point of honoring his image - being a real Fashionista - so if he has a little scar or a button in a visible place, he would fall into a real exaggerated and incredible existential crisis. Better not imagine if he is tortured or disfigured; then, he would die.    

2p!China (6/10) :

    Xiao doesn’t really like killing, but he will do it if he has to. If someone is threatening his rug market, he would go kill him without mercy. He particularly uses poisons poured into his victim’s food or stab them with little assassin’s knives in a dark area or at a street corner. He’s part of the Chinese triads so he’s an experienced gangster who knows everything about the art of removing people. He then can kill, but he also loves to threaten.  

    He’s maybe a gangster, but when Xiao is in love, he’s deeply enamored of the person and he can do everything for them and protect them from the entire world, especially his wild life. If something happen to them, he would feel guilty his whole life and never can forget himself for not being able to protect them, even after his finished revenge. Then, when he’s in love, his worst fear is that something happens to this person and not being able to protect them.

2p!Finland (7/10) :

    Thurston is a very quickly angered person, sometimes even to the point that he enters into angry phases exceptionally violent, in which he needs to evacuate all of his wrath by breaking things for example. In order to avoid that, he generally takes his gun and his dog and go on a hunt; which is a real way to let off steam for him. The rest of the time, even if he has a grumpy and nervous personality, he’s not a bad man, but a simple bad news or an arguing are enough for his irritable temperament to explode.    

    The worst fear for Thurston is to be invaded again by 2p!Russia and to not be able to defend himself to repulse him. Being invade is for him a sign of weakness and powerlessness and his first invasion by Viktor centuries before was a really painful defeat. A second one and it would be the worst thing for him. He needs to prove to everyone that he is strong and that he can go up against 2p!Russia as a proof.    

2p!Norway (7/10) :

    Loki seems to be someone particularly smiling and friendly, but when we begin to enter into his life, he would tend to not want you to leave his side and would grab onto the person when he starts to like them. And the more we stay near him, the more he would show us his unstable and manic side of him by stalking us everywhere to know what we’re doing. He especially does that with 2p!Denmark he really loves. However, he’s very mean and violent with 2p!Iceland (he’s the one who tears off his eyes). It must not be forgotten that Loki is a passionate pyromaniac which explains his burns. He loves to burn everything he can 

    In addition to being a pyromaniac, Loki also possesses the same magical capacities as his 1p counterpart. However, he’s really afraid of these magic because with him it quickly become out of control. He already summoned powerful demons and spirits who haunted him, which lead him to be scared of his own powers and dark forces he can invoke. That’s why he uses them very little in order to not make him or his close relatives in danger.  

2p!Iceland (8/10) :

    After being raised by his unstable brother, it’s not very surprising that Egil, even if not very dangerous, has serious mental issues, particularly a borderline personality disorder that makes him have moods swings and wishes of self-harming. He suffers from anxiety, depression and the PTSD complex (a trauma due to repeated traumatic situations over long periods). A great cocktail that makes from Egil a likeable and nice young man from the first sight, but particularly disturbed.

    His brother might well be unstable, it doesn’t stop Egil from loving him like a big brother. 2p!Norway, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to see him as a little brother. The Icelandic is very attached to Loki, even if he is cold and cruel to him since he found him on his island and brought him to Norway. He is very destabilized when his big brother isn’t near him and if Loki disappear, it would be a part of Egil’s world would crumble.    

2p!Prussia (9/10) :

    The biggest problem of Gilen is from far his deep depression, which locks him in an almost constant muteness. His depression causes a lot of stress, a big lack of self-confidence and a self-loathing that sometimes bring him to self-harm that add more scars than he already have because of his wars. His mood is generally very dark and all his words speak about death and pain. His unique way to escape is his daydream when he walks in beautiful landscapes or when he writes in his diary, although his writing still is very sad. He is unstable, but from all of the 2ps, he’s the less dangerous for the others; he can’t hurt anyone.  

    Finally, the worst insecurity of Gilen is life itself. It’s not beautiful or nice with him, and he tries to stay away from it as much as he can. He must have been weary before his territories’ dismemberment and his nation’s death should have been some sort of comfort for him, but he noticed that he still lived even after his nation’s fall. That’s most certainly what drove him into depression that he couldn’t die with his nation. Now, he lost all hope of dying and lock himself into his sickness.  

2p!England (10/10) :

    Generally, Oliver would be seen as someone normal, sometimes a little bit too much happy. But he has manic phases, just like Luciano, in which he is quite capable of killing someone, even if it’s with a less violent way than 2p!North Italy. He prefers to pour poison in his cupcakes before giving it to his victims. Although what he does after being as much violent because he sometimes cuts his victims out and stuff his cupcakes with organs. He has an obsessive personality disorder that makes him stick a person he really appreciates like a glue.  

    However, his good mood only is a mask to hide his fear of losing the ones he really loves, like François his lover-enemy, his two “sons” Allan and Matt and his friends like Flavio. He is terribly afraid of being all alone, also, the distant behavior of his closest family member hurt him a lot. Then, he easily could enter in a depressive phase. It already happens after being insulted or attacked. He is extremely sensitive.  

2p!North Italy (10/10) :

    Luciano is most certainly one of the most insecure 2ps with 2p!England. He is a maniac who suffers from hyperactivity. As far as he can have self-control when he supervise and give orders, he can also be entirely controlled by his aggressive impulses and enter in a psychotic phase which made him kill on a whim. It’s generally very violent and his favorite way of killing is by stabbing his victim several times. He likes to torture his victims before killing them, especially when he wants them to give him information.    

    His most important insecurity is his paranoia. He is convinced that everyone wants to make an attempt on his life (after all, he is the boss’ mafia). He also tends to eliminate anyone around him in whom he has doubts, except when it’s someone very close and he appreciates a lot. Then, he would give them the benefit of the doubt and put them under guard. Indeed, because of his oversized paranoia, he will tend to have a lot of spies, which he will order to watch each other. This way, he could have his eye on his enemies, friends, family, colleagues and his own spies.  

Questions 16-20 for the oc things and uh, question A-C for the creator questions. Im on mobile so i cant tell what is what

I’ll do Beni!!

What makes their stomach turn?

He gets seasick way too easily to be on a ship. Guess he lucked out that James primarily flies, huh?

Are they easily embarrassed?

HMMMMM GOOD QUESTION I’d say naw. Beni does a lot of dumb things, but they’re primarily to make people laugh or while everyone’s having a good time and doing even dumber things. If he does get embarrassed, though, he so tries to play it off and make it seem like it’s not that big a deal even if it is.

What embarrasses them?

Don’t mention his crush on Jean EVER or he will spontaneously combust and die. Also don’t mention that one girl from Alu. Also don’t mention Dierdre or the fight to get that lil rascal.

What is their favorite number?

3. It makes him think of the :3 face that cats make. This boy loves cats!!!

If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?

He’d describe it as:

Romantic love makes you want to...just...go crazy and run outside and whirl around and dance because you just love them so much, you know? You pass by a bouquet of flowers and you need to keep yourself from spending your earnings on it. And like, I don’t know you see them and your heart goes “thump thump” and you just kind of want to die you can’t handle how amazing they are? Yeah, like that. 

Platonic love is like when you see a cat fall off a box and stare at it all confused and you go “Ahah what an idiot” but you still love it? That’s platonic love.

A) Why are you excited about this character?

So like, a lot of characters in Seraetia have an unpleasant past (or tragic, in some cases), and they all deal with it differently, and I think Beni’s way of dealing with it is really refreshing? Cool? He doesn’t so much “deal with it” as he is just...shaped by it? Spoiler: he lost his brother and it was devastating, but unlike, let’s say, Ngai who actively deal with his issues and secrets, Beni has already came to terms. His story hasn’t bled into this one, and his person is solid and isn’t likely to change drastically like some others’. Idk he’s a fun character to think about and write, and he’s comedic relief without sacrificing his more serious qualities.

B) What inspired you to create them?

He was actually added in very early on?? He was either the fourth or sixth characters I made for Seraetia. I just really liked his design, and I realized I never really tried to give people like, pronounced chins or anything, so I drew Beni. And I liked him, and I was like “Huh I could use you for this.” So yeah.

Beni was a big chin who made his way to glory.

C) Did you have trouble figuring out where they fit in their own story?

I have a little bit of trouble, but not more so than any of the other characters. Almost everyone in Seraetia has an experience that’s so vastly unlike my own that I want to make sure I put time and care into writing and rewriting their backstories to make sure they make like, a believable person (I still have so many books I ned to finish reading for James...). I’ve already rewritten Robert’s and James’ backstories, and I’ve retconned William’s endgame and changes his backstory to something less dramatic and more real. The amount of things I’ve tossed around and gotten rid of is pretty funny, really.

As for Beni, I feel like I’ve put him on the sidelines along with Derik and Emmanuel. His backstory isn’t as fleshed out as the others’ and even though I’ve said he’s really “come into his own” earlier, that might be subject to change. So far, I feel like his story is good, but needs a bit more depth and personal stakes before I could call him fully realized.

Seishun Buta Yarou wa Logical Witch no Yume wo Minai

Author: Hajime Kamoshida

Illustrator: Kenji Mizoguchi

Label: Dengeki Bunko

Release Date: 10 January 2015

English Release: This series has been licensed in English by Yen-Press. This volume will likely be titled Rascal Does not Dream of Logical Witch.

Art Notes: There’s a colour illustration of Rio in a bath and it’s pretty fan-service-y. I was disappointed when I saw it because Rio is in high school and is clearly uncomfortable about her breasts and her body and I thought that the anime did a good job at avoiding the use of the male gaze so I was sad the light novel did not do the same and I think that being the first colour illustration you see when you open the volume lessens the impact of her arc.

SPOILER WARNING: There will be spoilers in this post. I accidentally ended up writing it assuming that the reader will have seen the anime adaptation of this volume which was my mistake but I don’t want to rewrite it. I didn’t go too in-depth with the spoilers but I did briefly end up talking about the resolution for the volume so be warned.

This is Rio’s volume and the phenomenon here is "doppelganger”. I think this volume is a good example of what I mean when I say that this series biggest strength is in how relatable it’s characters are. I personally had a similar experience to Rio when I was going through puberty where my body started to feel like the enemy and I hated it and I started to hate myself as a result so, while the source of my problem was different from Rio’s, I totally get what Rio is going through here. My mental state never got as bad as to upload pictures of myself like Rio did but I do understand her motivations and her mindset feels like those of a high school girl and I feel like the author did his research and likely consulted several women about their experiences in puberty. And I like that Rio’s conclusion is not that she accepts and loves herself; it’s that she realises that she does not have to go to such lengths to receive love from others. She’s still got a long way to go to being okay but she’s getting there. It’s not perfect but I do think that it’s a lot better than most portrayals of teenage girls that I have seen in light novels.

That being said, I’m not sure that relatability really justifies the sheer amount of pointless scenes that aren’t even funny. A scene where Sakuta makes guesses about what underwear Tomoe is wearing under her yukata does fuck all but leave me frustrated. It’s like the characters themselves feel realistic and relatable but the way that the characters talk is far from it. The dialogue leaves me feeling frustrated and I hate it.

The most off-putting part in this volume is the part where Sakuta is teaching Shouko (who’s in her first year of middle school so I assume she would be about 12) how to bath a cat and Shouko ends up with her white dress soaked and Sakuta just normally offers her a shower and a change of clothes. This is fine but Mai then confronts Sakuta and he protests that Shouko is still just a kid, to which she says that she’s still a girl. She then justifies her words by asking Shouko if she still bathes with her father to which she doesn’t and somehow this works and Sakuta thinks that Shouko is not that much of a kid (ah, yes, the two genders: bathes with dad and bathes without dad). I do think that Mai has reason to be suspicious of Sakuta’s intentions towards Shouko since she resembles the girl who changed his life but this scene was just bizarre to me and it took me out of the narrative entirely.

So, yeah, I enjoyed Rio’s parts of this volume and I thought they were relatable but there were those bits that really annoyed me as I was reading so I couldn’t fully immerse myself in the narrative.

Adaptation Notes:

This volume is adapted in episodes 7 & 8 of the anime. The anime keeps most of Rio’s scenes and actually adds a few short scenes for her that I liked but cuts a lot of Shouko’s stuff. In the light novel, we actually get a good idea of what’s going on with Shouko in this volume and the plotline with her cat is resolved but almost all of her scenes are cut for the anime. The other scene that I liked that was cut was a scene where Sakuta consults Nanjou, the reporter from volume 1, about Rio’s situation with her social media account (wihout mentioning Rio by name) and I really liked that he consulted a woman about that and that he followed her advice because it makes Sakuta feel far less perfect, like he does in the anime when confronting Rio about the pictures. The rest of the scenes that were cut were just those annoying dialogue scenes and I am so glad they were cut because I never would have enjoyed the anime had they stayed in.

Like I said at the start, I think the anime does a really good job at avoiding the use of male gaze framing which is important with Rio who does have issues with her body. Even the scenes where she’s in a bath don’t feel particularly lecherous or anything and I think it leads to her arc being much stronger as a result.

Next volume is the Siscon Idol volume, focusing on Mai’s younger sister and their relationship and I’ll be reading it soon, probably.

Dear Andrew,

Thank you. Thank you so much, for all that you have done in the last couple months. You have no idea how much just being around you means to me. 

Thank you for letting me travel with you this week, for flying me home when we get to Texas. Thank you for agreeing to let me go, despite not wanting me to be alone with my thoughts on that plane. Its gonna be hard, flying by myself, but thank you for helping me to grow as a human.

Thank you for just being a calming presence. For being somebody who keeps me grounded, I know i do the same for you, but thank you.

You are an amazing person, and im glad you took a small chance on me when i first spent the night at your place, because i was having roommate issues. Its crazy how much happens in just a few months. or well even the span of just a year. 

Its crazy how close we have grown in about 12 months. I didnt start talking to you until numerical and our friendship blossomed from there. 

It feels as if i have known you for years and not just a couple months. 

I appreciate you so very much and its going to suck without you here, but i know that i will still be talking to you nearly everyday. 

Why do you have to leave? I mean i know but i like you being here, i like chilling at your house. I like being around you.

I love you so so so much. I am so grateful that you came into my life. You were a saving grace so many times this summer. I was in such a bad place and you were there to help remind me that there are better things. Yeah you liked me and felt bad about that and tried stopping messaging me so much, but you couldn’t. I was always on your mind. You were always on my mind too, you still are. I think about you so much, like what are you thinking, what are you doing.

What are you going to do when im gone? Over thanksgiving, you didnt initiate, are you going to continue doing that or are you going to initiate? Are you going to try to slip back into your old holding pattern with her?

How has your relationship changed since i came into your life in the way i did? Are you going to try to change it? Idk if i will tell any future boys about you. Idk who they would be, but idk if i could tell them about you... i feel like it would break trusts that i know i cant break

Are you still able to marry her? Knowing what you know now about this? About your thoughts? about the fog of december? 

This got a lot farther than when it went down with me... idk if i would be able to follow through with that promise because of my own broken promises and trusts. I know you know yourself better than i know myself, but i wouldnt be sure if i could trust myself enough to not go down that path again.. I didnt think that i would be on this path again. I trusted myself when i was with sir formal that nothing would happen again. Even if i have an inkling of attraction i would put it in a box and crush it. but that didnt happen with you. You tried that and it fought against you. If anything it came back with some kind of vengeance. 

I hope i will be able to trust myself not to break another’s trust in me again. I broke a persons trust who doesnt even know me. The things i have done with you. idk.

Thank you, still i am sad that you are leaving, but my life has been better since being with you and staying with you and just getting to know you. It surprises me still how much i dont know about you, while knowing the world about you. 

Thank you. I love you. 

and now for a list of songs that are “our songs” or songs that remind me of us ( i omitted some songs, but here is my list, i know you have different songs that immediately remind you of me )

Good Old Days Macklemore and Ke$ha

Temporary Bliss The Cab

Rewrite the Stars Zac Efron and Zendaya

Can’t help it Anarbor

Something Just Like This The Chainsmokers and Coldplay

broken lovelytheband

Like I’m Gonna Lose You Meghan Trainor and John Legend

Rather Be Clean Bandit and Jess Glynne

Can’t fight this feeling REO Speedwagon

Just a kiss Lady Antebellum

I got the boy Jana Kramer

Happier Marshmello and Bastille

Bless the Broken Road Rascal Flatts

What hurts the most Rascal Flatts (debatable but kinda applies)

Dirty Little Secret The All-American Rejects

Addicted Saving Abel

The Great Escape Boys like Girls 

Not Meant to Be Theory of a Deadman (also debatable)