#or they would be WASHING THEIR HANDS. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

inkskinned · 7 months

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love when men cry about body hair bc "it's hygiene" and yet 15% of cis men leave the bathroom without washing their hands at all and an additional 35% only just wet their hands without using soap. that is nearly half of all men. that means statistically you have probably shaken hands with or been in direct contact with one of these people.

love when men say that women "only want money" when it turns out that even in equal-earning homes, women are actually adding caregiver burdens and housework from previous years, whereas men have been expanding leisure time and hobbies. in equal-earning households, men spend an average of 3.5 hours extra in leisure time per week, which is 182 hours per year - a little over a week of paid vacation time that the other partner does not receive. kinda sounds like he wants her money.

love that men have decided women are frail and weak and annoying when we scream in surprise but it turns out it's actually women who are more reliable in an emergency because men need to be convinced to actually take action and respond to the threat. like, actually, for-real: men experience such a strong sense of pride about their pre-supposed abilities that it gets them and their families killed. they are so used to dismissing women that it literally kills them.

love it. told my father this and he said there's lies, damned lies, and statistics. a year ago i tried to get him to evacuate the house during a flash flood. he ignored me and got injured. he has told me, laughing, that he never washes his hands. he has said in the last week that women are just happier when we're cooking or cleaning.

maybe i'm overly nostalgic. but it didn't used to feel so fucking bleak. it used to feel like at least a little shameful to consider women to be sheep. it just feels like the earth is round and we are still having conversations about it being flat - except these conversations are about the most obvious forms of patriarchy. like, we know about this stuff. we've known since well before the 50's.

recently andrew tate tried to justify cheating on his partner as being the "male prerogative." i don't know what the prerogative for the rest of us would be. just sitting at home, watching the slow erosion of our humanity.

#writeblr #warm up #ps edited so it is more clear where “half” of men is coming from:#15% literally don't even touch water #an ADDITIONAL 35% ''wash'' by just running their hands under water WITHOUT SOAP #15+35 =50%#like that is not washing ur hands. go back and use soap #btw the numbers for women are 4% never washing and 15% ''just water''#which is still gross but like. sooo much better yikes #ps i know we're all gay on this site but watching ppl ''correct'' my math on this has been wild #i have a learning disability im genuinely bad at math so i check EVERY time someone corrects me #but no they're just confidently wrong.....#182 hours is a week babes. 182/24 (number of hours in a day) is ~7.6 #that's where i got that number from. also from rent we know there's 168 hours in a week.#ALSO btw if u read this and ur response is ''men are also struggling rn tho'' like babe you missed the point of it tho #this doesn't even make fun of men it's legit just pointing out that bigotry against women isn't founded #in anything men actually CARE about . like they don't actually CARE about ''being clean'' when they make fun of armpit hair #or they would be WASHING THEIR HANDS.#men pretend to be rollin' in cash and Apex Predators and instead they are trained to be lazy and unwilling to act in emergencies #i have never and will never make fun of men for asking for more support on important topics like DV and mental health.#this is so clearly not about men; it's about how common just being plainly misogynistic has become.#like they don't try to hide it anymore.

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lobsterfork · 3 months

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so i'm working on my first print, for future reference, are you guys more likely to purchase something fancy and custom-sized, or something that's more readily frame-able, like a4/a3? also seriously guys interview with the vampire is so fucking good please tell me you're watching it

#iwtv #interview with the vampire #amc iwtv #lestat de lioncourt #the vampire chronicles #louis de pointe du lac #anne rice #if i can cobble this one together somewhat successfully i'm gonna do a claudia print next i'm so excited #loustat #that hand looks weird and my the phone camera is washing out louis so ENTIRELY but if anyone else has any constructive crit #i would be so grateful 🙏🙏🙏

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kaeya-senpai · 4 months

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Merry Christmas from vbs!!!!!!!!!!

#digital art #my art #pjsk #proseka #project sekai #colourful stage #akito shinonome #vbs akito #toya aoyagi #vbs toya #kohane azusawa #vbs kohane #an shiraishi #vbs an #vbs #vivid bad squad #merry christmas #akito and an would wash their hands after that but only the one that held akito/an

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jtl-fics · 11 months

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Fluent Freshman - Part 21

“What made you think taking on a mafia hitman was a good idea?” Andrew asks as he and FF were positioning themselves the best the could for an ambush on Romero.

Since, they APPARENTLY had time to talk.

Romero had gotten the text Andrew had sent him and INSTEAD of coming out right away to progress the whole SCHEME to kidnap and murder Andrew’s Junkie like any sensible goon Romero went to the BAR. Romero went to the Bar to get him and Jackson a round of CELEBRATORY drinks. Romero is still there at the bar waiting to be served by an INCREDIBLY nervous Roland if the number of exclamation marks and puking emojis is to be believed.

What the FUCK is there to celebrate?

These two idiots want to kidnap NEIL and so far the only thing Romero knows (thinks) that they’ve caught are two people that Neil would come for but even in Andrew’s text he’d been clear that he needed help getting ‘The boyfriend and the new friend’ to talk let alone getting them to call ‘The Wesninski Brat’ out. Andrew had hated typing the name in reference to Neil but it was the only thing the two ever referred to him as in their chats.

Is it some insane mental game that Romero thought he and Jackson were going to play on Andrew and Smith? Toasting to their torture so they’d give up Neil? Who knows.

He realizes that FF hasn’t answered him, his eyes focused on the door when Andrew’s thoughts had drifted. A reliable guy, steady in a pinch, and focused like most the others weren’t.

(Andrew does not know that FF is thinking about how one would go about becoming a Mafia Hitman. What is that career path like? Do they show up at job fairs? Do you get a job as a short order cook at a business that acts as a front and see to much but you’re also the only one that knows the secret spaghetti recipe the boss likes so you have to sign yourself to the family? Are you out doing your own freelance crime and someone higher up sees your work one day and literally head hunts you? Is it like in Saw where you survive an ordeal and then-)

“Smith?” Andrew draws FF’s attention away from the door.

“I didn’t think it was a good idea at any point.” FF says and Andrew is surprised by the admission and is more surprised by the twist of FF’s lips into a frown, “I just did what I thought I needed to do.” He adds.

(Andrew does not know that the twist of FF’s lips has more to do with the fact that he is realizing that Romero likely STILL has not washed his hands. Romero hasn’t washed his hands and he is going to hand Jackson a DRINK with those hands. Ugh. Honestly a contract killer AND someone who doesn’t wash his hands? Who RAISED him? What does his grandma think of this? FF hopes she’s disappointed in him.)

“You thought you needed to lure a hitman into an alley?” Andrew asks because the plan is stupid even if so far it has worked out for FF. The fact that Romero hadn’t just come out when he sent Jackson the signal is only due to FF’s good luck and their stupidity.

“I didn’t have a lot of time to think up anything more than the first plan I thought of. I saw him looking at Nicky on the dance floor.” FF says with another twist of his lips as he self-consciously rubbed at his cheek. It’s never fun to have someone who has time to pick apart a plan that you barely had time to form. Andrew can understand the irritation and is glad that FF isn’t lashing out at him for it.

(Andrew does not know that FF is not irritated he is just remembering that he had held up his broken toilet bowl phone to his face to pretend call Captain Neil. He’s contemplating asking if Andrew maybe possibly has a wet wipe? Actually the murder van probably has bleach to clean up evidence, maybe he can just dip his face in there for like a minute.)

“Don’t use a plan where you martyr yourself. I already have to deal with Neil’s bullshit tendencies.” Andrew says instead of thanking him. “You should have just called me.” He says.

FF just holds up his phone, “Dropped into a club toilet. Completely unusable.” He says and yeah that makes sense. FF would have probably just texted Andrew but coming out and seeing a hitman going after Nicky probably made it impossible for the freshman to go get help without drawing all the attention to himself first if he wanted to make sure Nicky stayed safe.

Still.

“You dropped it into a toilet? You haven’t even had anything tonight.” He says because that clumsiness is not something he expects from FF.

“You try taking a pee next to someone on the FBI’s most wanted list and see how dry your palms remain when he’s talking about grabbing one of Captain Neil’s friends to lure him out.” He says with a brow raised.

That’s fair.

He figures that Romero hadn’t even noticed FF standing there. FF was incredibly good at just making himself unnoticeable (to Andrew’s occasional great annoyance and to Kevin’s great desire to study him for Exy related purposes).

“You recognized him?” He asks.

FF’s gaze slides to him, “I looked up a lot about the Foxes after I signed.” FF answers before his gaze slides back to the door. Roland had just texted Andrew that he’s getting Romero’s drinks ready (Two bud lites. Those are the celebratory drinks he waited for?? Embarrassing.) “I really looked up to Captain Neil. So, I read a lot more about him than anyone else.” FF admits but the fact that FF looked up to Neil was not in any way shape or form a secret.

FF was the only one who was ALWAYS paying attention to whatever Neil was saying and never argued with it. Even Andrew tended to just get lost in the sound of Neil’s voice when he’s going over Exy plays and not actually listen to the plan. FF’s eyes were always right on Neil and his actions on the court showed that he had been paying attention and knew what he was doing. Kevin also listened but he tended to fight Neil on the finer details of plays, strategy or anything else. FF was the one who would just nod and do his part in whatever possible play Neil had broken down for them.

FF was also categorically incapable of referring to Neil as anything other than Captain Neil.

Neil had bristled early on at it. He had thought it was a mocking title, something FF was saying to rile him up because that’s what Freshman Foxes did. That’s what Freshman Foxes always do. FF slid into the team without a whisper of rebellion and it hadn’t taken long to realize that FF was using the title with sincerity even if his monotone did not perfectly convey that.

It’d been that sincerity and that ease that had FF be the only option he’d considered when Bee said he should consider expanding his friend pool.

So if FF looked a little deeper into Neil’s past and sees Neil’s part in it as something to respect, something to admire?

Well, he personally thought he always had great taste in people. (He ignores the voice in his head that sounds like Nicky complaining about Kevin still not knowing German despite it being the family language.)

“You sure you don’t want one of my knives or the knife Jackson had?” It was pretty big and Andrew didn’t think it would work well with his general style but maybe FF could use it somehow. He was uneasy that FF was going into this fight unarmed. FF still hadn’t talked about how he’d taken out Jackson when the man had a knife like that.

“Do I look like Crocodile Dundee to you?” FF asks with a raised eyebrow and Andrew has to pause a moment for the movie to load into his brain before he offers an amused quirk of his own lips.

FF is a funny guy.

His phone dings. “He’s on his way.”

***

Aside from thinking about how nice the conversation he was having with his friend Andrew (his friend! His friend Andrew! God how is he going to admit to Gran that Andrew was never planning on stabbing him? She threatened to come over and square off with the ‘mean young man’ bullying him. He’s gotta go grab the makings for a secondary pie to even start to make up for this. Maybe Andrew would prefer a cobbler? He should ask his friend his preferences.) he was thinking about how he really wished they hadn’t had a cut away from Gracie Hart showing all the various forms of self defense she knows in the movie.

He had no idea if he could do a repeat performance of S.I.N.G. with Romero.

It’d be nice to have a few more things in his repertoire because all he has is striking Romero with the heel of his hand in the nose, getting grabbed from behind to throw him over his shoulder (which what if Romero is shorter than him? How will THAT work. Gracie Hart guide my steps!), and of course S.I.N.G.

If he survives this he might write a letter to the writer.

The door opens and honestly FF and Andrew agreed that surprise and speed were going to be their best weapons. The two of them go in for a full body tackle but Romero must just be a higher class goon than Jackson was since he manages to body them away. The door shuts which is mostly what they wanted anyways. Romero can’t go back in and grab someone to use as a shield.

He sees Andrew pull out his knives and now FF realizes that any level of threatening Andrew had done before must have mostly been in jest or just as intimidation. When Andrew wants to stab someone it’s obvious that he’s aiming to stab them.

Romero manages to parry Andrew’s first stab with a move that FF had seen on the ‘how to handle someone coming at you with a knife’ videos. FF sees Romero go in to bash one of the Bud Lite bottles over Andrew’s head so he launches his water bottle at Romero’s hand. The bottle falls and shatters harmlessly on the ground.

He kicks Romero’s other hand since the water bottle bought him time to get close. “You fucking brat!” Romero hisses.

He sees Romero reaching for something at the same time Andrew is going in for the second round of stabbing. Romero dodges out of the way but FF can see what might actually for real be an entire gun concealed in his jacket.

He can see Romero going for it. Sees the same smile on his face he’d seen inside as his hand wraps around the handle.

FF doesn’t think.

FF doesn’t think because if he does he’ll freeze.

So FF acts.

“Gun!” He yells and runs full force tackling Romero as hard as he can but unfortunately he tackles Romero into Andrew.

The three of them grapple on the ground. It’s hard to keep track of what limb is who’s and he’s pretty sure he’s accidentally hit Andrew a few times instead of Romero but he’s also pretty sure that Andrew punched him in the stomach so he thinks they’re equal. Finally FF gets a hand on the gun that Romero had been trying to get the safety off of and he knocks it out of Romero’s hand. “You kids will-“

Romero doesn’t get to say anything else because Andrew manages to land a punch right to his jaw that has Romero go limp under the two of them. They look at one another and Andrew manages to pull the handcuffs they’d purloined out of the Van while they were waiting off of the belt loop they were hooked onto and gets them around Romero’s wrists.

They stare down at the second unconscious man on the FBI’s most wanted list in the alley.

Then they roll off of him and onto their backs. Both of them wheezing from a combination of exertion, adrenaline, and (at least in FF’s case) a fair amount of pain (Christ Andrew packs a PUNCH his stomach is already sensitive. It’s a miracle that punch hadn’t made him puke.)

“That was…so stupid.” Andrew pants.

“Yeah probably.” FF admits.

They lay there for about a minute and FF thinks that maybe someone will need to carry him because his stomach is KILLING HIM with all this.

“Alright let’s-“

Andrew is sitting up and looking at him when he stops talking.

FF doesn’t really know what the issue is but starts to sit up, “Don’t you DARE.” Andrew hisses and FF finds himself being pushed back down to the ground to lay flat. “Don’t move Smith.” He demands and is pulling his phone out of his pocket as he keeps a hand on FF’s shoulder.

FF doesn’t really understand what’s got Andrew so upset all the sudden. “Andrew, what’s-“ he tries to sit up again. Is there a third person and Andrew wants him to keep down? There’s not really cover here they should move towards the dumpster maybe?

“Smith, I told you to not move.” Andrew hisses before whoever he’s calling seems to pick up. “I need police and an ambulance. We’re at Eden’s Twilight in the back alley.” He looks to FF, “What’s your blood type?” He asks.

FF has NO idea.

“I don’t know.” He answers and Andrew makes a disgusted sound. “Andrew, what’s-“

Then he sees it.

He doesn’t quite get how he missed it before now.

“Huh.” He hears himself say.

That’s Andrew’s knife handle sticking out of his stomach.

It appears that Andrew Minyard may have stabbed him in the stomach.

“Well, that’s about what I expected.” He says and lets his head rest against the pavement.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

Per your requests:

@i-have-three-feelings @blep-23 @dreamerking27 @andreilsmyreligion @belodensetdust @rainbowpineapplebottle @yarn-ace @iwouldlikesometea @lily-s-world @obscureshipsandchips @booklover242 @whataboutmyfries @sahturnos @pluto-pepsi @dreamerthinker @passinhosdetartaruga @leftunknownheart @aro-manita-muscaria @hologramsaredead @Chaoticgremlinswishtheycouldbeme @tntwme @tayspots @nick-scar @crazy-fangirl2524 @blue-jos10 @stabbyfoxandrew @splishsplashyouropinionistrash @sammichly @the-broken-pen @bitchesdoweknowu @very-small-flower @ghostlyboiii @its-a-paxycab @bisexual-genderfluid-fan @cheesecookie @theoneandonlylostsock @foxsoulcourt @blueleys @adverbialstarlight @elia-nna @can-i-just-stay-in-the-corner @nikodiangel @foxandcrow-inatrenchcoat @hallucinatedjosten @satanic-foxhole-court @vexingcosmos @chalilodimun @insectsgetcooked @angry-kid-with-no-money @queer-crows @lillyndra @themugglemudperson @readertodeath @apileofpillows @mortalsbowbeforeme @hellomynameismoo @next-level-mess @youreonlylow @interstellarfig @notprocrastinatingatalltoday @percyjacksonfan3 @queenofcrazy27 @bsmr261 @ghostlyscares @spencellio @adinthedarkroom @harpymoth @sufferingjustalilbit @anxietymoss @oddgreyhound @ohno-myhyperfixation-itsbroken @ken22789 @atiredvampire @isoldescorner @not--a--pipedream @azure-wing @bushbees @roonilwazlib-main @crumplelush @foldedaces-paperbirds @thesenseinnonsense @let-tyrants-fear @ketchupfriesandallthingsnice @legowerewolf @deadlydodos @but-we-respect-his-craft @cariniqe @zanypersonapricotbiscuit @lesbian-blackbeard @lesbiansupernatural @silvermasquerade @thepeachfuzz @minniemariex @kazoo-the-demjin

The requests to be added to the tag list keep being spread out across a few different areas. If I missed you please just ask again in the replies I promise I just missed you.

As stated before if you’re up here and I spelled it right but you didn’t get a notification there might be something switched around in your settings that won’t let me tag you properly?

#Fluent Freshman AU #He was RIGHT all along.#The Cassandra of Anxiety #He just kind of had no idea that it would be an accident #Vote now on FF's blood type #I will just say this now that this is not going to be a story where FF dies and Andrew's upset #This is me thinking that this is kind of a funny way for this night to end considering everything #If FF had a phone he would absolutely text his gran on the ambulance ride over #FF: SO I WAS BOTH COMPLETELY WRONG AND RIGHT #FF: Andrew wants to be my friend but due to bizarre circumstances he sure did accidentally stab me tonight #FF: BTW do YOU know my bloodtype? Because the nice EMT lady keeps asking me if I'm sure I don't know.#But FF doesn't have a phone so maybe he drifts a lil closer to the afterlife for a comedic reunion with great gran #GG: You're going to be okay. There's no way you'll die in a fight against a man who doesn't wash his hands #FF: I'm scared to check the state of his skin behind his ears.#GG: Exactly #AFTG #AFTG Fic #AFTG AU #AFTG OC #My Fic #Let's see if you all can find all the various lil jokes that I've made knowing that THIS #THIS is how this night was always gonna end for FF #I've gotten a kick out of putting them in #FF - Pt.21

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dahldahlbills · 2 years

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i had a dream shane caught some insane evidence while investigating a location. he was walking through a restroom with a few stalls in it and complaining about how dirty it was. “Look at all this tra—“ but before he could finish he noticed on his camera a pair of legs in the first stall he passed by and he stayed quiet as he watched the stall door swing open and a full body apparition walked out and turned away from him, disappearing as it stepped toward the sinks. He was totally dumbfounded at first but then he said “it’s a good thing ryan wasn’t in here, his screaming would’ve spooked the ghost.”

#ghost files #watcher #shane madej #ryan bergara #they would no doubt make some sort of poop joke if this happened #either that or they’d make fun of how the ghost didn’t wash its hands #i actually don’t know what place they were investigating or why Ryan wasn’t in the room with him #it was p wild #you could hear just how shocked shane was #but Shane would still find some way to brush it off probably

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unpretty · 13 hours

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the real mvp of not having running water is this motherfucker

#original #yes as a matter of fact i WOULD like to wash my hands with ease #thank you cheap plastic party jug from the dollar store

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iwaasfairy · 25 days

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Okay but imagine if it was incel nii-chan or uncle (i haven't gotten over that one yet) gojo. How worse would he be 😭

I genuinely genuinely had to hold off on immediately turning it into cest when I gOt thAT ASK KFNFJFJJFJF but since you’re giving me a platform!!

Absolutely!!! Satoru nii as an incel would work soooo well brrrbbrrrrrrrr he’s just like a nasty guy, he’s mean, he’s impatient— and worst of all he thinks you owe him the right of snuggling up on you even tho he’s sweaty and gross and stinks and kissing up on you n shit

Also he doesn’t like women all that much bc he wants them to immediately jump on him even when he’s not willing to put in the least bit of effort. He’s just forced to be around you, that’s the only reason why you even talk to him :/ and he has to go and make stupid shit comments about your body and if you don’t get a boyfriend soon half your eggs will already be dead and you should really just,,, settle already

Preferably with him

Only with him

#uncle gojo would never be an incel #he’s too admirable sexy smart and charismatic #though I’d still love to see it and experience it #yes yes #incel toru nii is great tho Hed piss me off so much #sticking his hands under your shirt to fondle you n shit #cold sticky hands from jerking it liTERALLY NASTY GO WASH #tw.noncon #tw.incest #honey mail

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deusluxuria · 5 months

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i love buccellati; he put on a pair of fuccing gloves to punch the urinal even though he was just gonna punch it with his stand

(id: screenshots from the golden wind anime. first one is buccellati's group in a public restroom. buccellati is standing in front of one of the urinals and putting gloves on. the second image is the arm of his stand punching one of the urinals)

sanitary king

(id: closeup of buccellati putting the gloves on)

#he said 'ur in good hands i washed mine'#people i would trust not to spread co/vid #people i would trust not to spread digestive waste particles everywhere #rare people who miraculously would not trigger my ocd (genuine... i got diagmosed last month loool)#bruno buccellati #bruno bucciarati #golden wind #vento aureo #jojo's bizarre adventure #jjba #this man takes his gloves off inside out and then washes his hands after throwing the gloves away #nvm i triggered my own damn ocd with this post hdhdjshdj #goign the fucc to bef #*bed

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y-rhywbeth2 · 3 months

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Durge: "Why are you at rest? Start cleaning the camp!" Sceleritas Fel: "Aaah! Master! I'm sorry, I'm ever-so sorry to forget my other duties! What a wretch I am! I'm not even worthy of being your scullery maid." [startled, realises he has done poorly] Durge: "Wash the dishes!" Sceleritas Fel: "At once. I will shatter some glasses and sprinkle the fragments in the beds of your other followers. Keep their dreams bloody."

Truly the world's most helpful butler. I would love to know how he interprets the other household chores.

#Imagine having a butler and having to clean up after them...#This is half the reason why I gave Vel a house in the upper city; imagining how Sceleritas would “tend to the estate” is hilarious #He does not understand subtlety or why we can't hang corpses around the front door to improve the décor #I wonder if anybody tried to teach him otherwise?#Durge: Try again.#Sceleritas: I will drown them in the soapy water!#Durge: ...On the other hand I'll do it myself.#Being Durge is suffering #Doomed to wash the dishes forever #sceleritas fel #durge #babbling #edgelord hours

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satans-knitwear · 11 months

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The little leggie straps have heart shaped link details 😍

Treat me ~ Tip me ~ More of me

#These straps go with the blue floral strappy piece i wore the other day and theres a lil matching choker as well!#I couldnt find them when i last wore it #Getting caught up on my hand washing is ruining my nails 😂#Satans knitwear #Alt pinup #Pinup girl #Lingerie detail #Thighs #Garter straps #bi girl #cheeky #uk girl #wlw #Any tips or treats would be massively appreciated right now 💕💕💕

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dungeons-and-dragon-age · 27 days

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"It's just you now. Take care of mother."

i have the normal amount of emotions about them (lying) <3

#a redraw but also not really cus i ended up tracing a lot from the old one hfldsjdfs #it was only supposed to be for reference but i ended up keep messing w it instead of redrawing it proper......#feel like i got his expression down better in the old one; looks more strained/ hearbroken like i feel #but thats fine #my art #my ocs #oc: liam hawke #i'm still not sure if liam or varric is the one who deals the killing blow #love both the thought of liam having his own sisters blood on his hands and never being able to wash it off fully #or his (future) best friend saving him that fate but now having that stand between them #cus liam would be grateful for it but part of him would always remember that and hold it against him #(both options also make the bartrand encounter crunchy in slightly different ways)#either way in that moment he kind of hates varric for even just being there. and fenris too #(though tbh im not sure how realistic it would be for him to take sb else except bethy and varric down into the deep roads)#((so maybe in canon fen wouldnt be there idk. havent decided this yet either))#logically he knows its not fair ofc but it just feels like an invasion of privacy. it feels Wrong.#they have no place in this they shouldnt have been there they shouldnt have been part of it they shouldnt have seen him like this #but its sth that binds them too #the rest of the trek is miserable and awkward for all of them in any case #but yeah.#idk if they would be able to bury her down here properly so maybe they end up doing it via lava?#theyre not leaving her body out in the open to rot and/or become food for darkspawn or spiders thats for sure

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queerregulusablack · 2 years

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Okay okay okay a PJO Marauders AU

James is a Son of Apollo because ??? who else could father this man. His conception was a kind of a favour to Effie and Monty - bc they were desperate for a child but couldn’t conceive without help, and Artemis elbowed Apollo and was like ‘bitch I can’t do it?’ so he made James for them - and James is very much in the camp of ‘thank you for the demigod stuff, still not my dad’ every time he crosses paths with his father.

Remus is the Son of Diana - Roman version of Artemis, Goddess of the Hunt and the Moon - and she Actually raised him for a little while, but he’s at Camp Half Blood for ~safety reasons~. He stays in the Athena cabin (because Artemis doesn’t have one, virgin goddess and all that) with:

Lily! Daughter of Athena. The Annabeth Chase parallels are too many to list. Can we really blame James for being obsessed with her? No, we cannot.

Peter is a Son of Demeter. He is very aware of how all of his friends are inclined toward chaos and heroics while he Literally Just Wants To Grow His Tomatoes Please. Pray for Peter, he is #suffering.

Sirius and Regulus, when they first arrive at Camp, don’t tell anyone who their parent is - Sirius talks whoever asks in circles until they’re laughing about something else, while Regulus just stares the askers down until they go away - and there’s a lot of discussion and debate, until it eventually - probably courtesy of a not-so-accidental slip of the tongue from Dumbledore - comes out that they’re the Sons of Nyx.

Being sons to the primordial Goddess of Night is complicated, even without all their personal trauma - Nyx was never widely worshipped, but the Blacks have worshipped her for generations, and when the decree went out that the Gods were no longer permitted to raise their own children, she put her sons in the care of Walburga and Orion thinking they’d treasure them. Walburga didn’t react well to figuring out that demigods or not, the children she’d been granted guardianship of were still, y’know, children - and Nyx is one of the only Gods Zeus is actually afraid of, so people knowing is a bit complicated.

Especially with the way many of Zeus’ grandkids rally around Sirius post-revelation, and his best friendship with James - Night and the Sun, how apt - while the kids of the less popular Gods circle Regulus, identifying with the more closed off little brother who takes his heritage a little more seriously and still calls Nyx mother in his prayers.

Extra points:

-In the midst of heroic such and such they all meet the Gods, and Regulus calls Zeus ‘nephew’ to his fucking face and James almost passes out from laughing so hard.

-Mary is a Daughter of Aphrodite; Marlene is a Daughter of Nike, Goddess of Victory; Dorcas is a Daughter of Ares; Pandora is a Daughter of Eris (and Regulus calls her niece, and she calls him uncle right back); Barty is a Son of Hermes: Evan is a Son of Hephaestus.

-James only figures out he’s got a special talent for healing when Remus is hurt by one of the Things That Hunt Him. Would it be cute if it was Starchaser? Yes. But it’s my AU and James Potter would move mountains for his friends.

-Regulus and Lily are gently wary of each other, to start, but quickly grow close, finding solidarity in Younger Sibling Trauma - Petunia is not a demigod, and her jealousy is cruel and sharp-edged - and being some of the only sane people in the whole Camp.

-Pandora is a chaos gremlin. Her mother is so proud.

-Nyx loves her sons. It tore her apart to give them up, and she’s still very angry about it. Regulus’ prayers keep her going. When she finds out what Walburga did to her kids, her revenge is nothing to be scoffed at.

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