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vrenaewrites · 4 years

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CARAVAL thoughts:

FULL VIDEO HERE.

Confession: I DNFed caraval about 2 years ago. I even included this book in a video called “reading 5 star reviews of books I hate” (either screen record and insert the clip from that vid or link in the cards skip to like 6:40 or both)

Chapter 1

We open with letters that our main character Scarlett has written to the caraval master Legend

She really wants him to come to her island but he hasn’t

She finally gets one back with three tickets for her Tella and her fiancé

Chapter 2

Scarlett’s feelings came in colors “urgent red of burning coals, frenzied yellow of a flapping bird’s feathers”

She goes to tell her sister Tella and finds her making out with a dude lol

Julian is his name

The edges of the paper “blazed a shimmery gold, the color of magic and wishes and promises of the things to come”

Tella hates the count Scarlett is betrothed to but Scarlett wants to leave their home so bad she doesn’t care who she ends up with

“Gods teeth!” Is the expletive…

The prize of caraval is one wish

They have to leave the isle within 3 days which would be impossible before getting married

Tella’s lips “shifted from broken to unbreakable” NO

Last time they left Scarlett’s dad did something terrible to her

Julian offers to smuggle them to the island for caraval on his sailor ship (pirate ship??)

“Goldenrod desire lit up inside her”

Wishes were about as real as unicorns

Their dad shows up with gloves “the shade of bruises”

Tella accuses Scarlett of hooking up with Julian RUDE!!!!

And Julian agrees!

Ohh because the dad beats the other sister so they’re trying to protect each other by accusing each other

Her marriage is 10 days away

Chapter 3

Her fathers perfume smelled like the color of his gloves

Julian decides to take them off the isle for free after witnessing this

Tella says if she leaves she will never return

“Her world was a grand game board, and her father believed this marriage would be his penultimate move”

“More than your sisters face will bleed” is their dad assaulting them?? Did I just gloss over that when reading this the first time??

“Weather worn white archways” loved

Governor dragna sounds like judge frollo

Their mom disappeared 7 years ago - abandoned them

They have priests and piety and the devil but they don’t use the BC AD calendar instead going by seasons and rulers...why

Chapter 4

She felt the lie from childhood “sneaking into her slippers and moving between her toes” no you didn’t

“A broken dock like a massive tongue jutted out to stones that reminded Scarlett if uneven teeth”

It was nights like these she could smell the moon - I wrote taste at first and taste fits better imo

A friend tried to help them escape once and the governor drowned him for it, Tella didn’t know about this

She meets Julian here at midnight and barters all 3 tickets to keep him from helping Tella escape

Julian and Tella ambush her and knock her out

Chapter 5

“A pock marked moon winked in the glass”

She has a dream about their nana telling them how legend got his name

First of all, legend is a bad dumb name and you should feel bad about it, Stephanie Garber. Caraval is also a bad name.

He was in love with a woman named Annalise and would perform at a coronation to earn her fathers respect, but he needed a witch to grant him a wish of talent

He had to choose between fame and love

So his name is legend because his magic is legendary? How tf did John legend not sue over this?

“Behind her a cloud drifted over the moon, covering all but two tiny points of light, which hovered behind her silver hair like devil’s horns” love this visual

I’m calling it now, we’re getting this flashback because somehow, the dragna sisters are related to Annalise or remind legend of Annalise and this is why Tella gets taken

Chapter 6

She wakes up in a rowboat with Julian after 2 days which is always a good way to pass the 2 days journey it takes without having to make anything happen lol I respect it

Julian calls her crimson instead of Scarlett - hated it then hate it now

Trees “rose toward the sky like massive emeralds” and the waterfall “streamed down like melted peacock feathers” no it didn’t because that makes no sense

Legends private island is called the island of dreams in Spanish

Tella has set up a kidnapping so Scarlett can go back without getting In trouble

“The image of a purple fire breathing dragon came to mind, coating her vision with ashy shades of anxiety”

I remember stopping very shortly after this and now I remember why - I can do purple prose but DAMN

Their mom had “vanished taking nothing with her, she disappeared like a broken star leaving the world untouched, save for the missing bits of light but no one would ever see again” Good purple prose

We get some backstory on how her Nana was more involved after her mother left, and we get to hear again about how great her stories are, even though we just spent a chapter getting that first hand from a flashback

She barters with herself to stay only one day and then go home for her wedding

There’s a hole in the boat so they swim but she didn’t take her dresses off so she starts to drown

“You deserve this” because of Phillippe, like hands the water pressed her down down down

Julian saved her and cuts off her dress which she finds very intense

Chapter 7

So much description of the snowy frosting sand pick one

I get that it’s a magical island but every descriptor up until the sand made it sound like a tropical paradise, and then suddenly the sand is snow and there’s ice and snow on the trees which were just giant emeralds so I’m confused

Because being wet and cold is more scary

“ The snow on the rooftops rested like dust on abandoned storybooks“

A very diagon alley sitch where there are magical stores but none are open...because it’s caraval guys. They’re at the games

They go into a clock shop where there are clothes waiting along with food roses and a note from legend

They change and she sees awful scars on his hot muscly back

Her dress is lame despite every YA trope about the heroine having a princess moment, that’s fun: just kidding it changed colors and shape to fit her perfect

And Julian’s outfit is super hot

He stole a pocket watch

Scarlett was a pretty girl but she tried to hide it, her eyes were too honest, no one noticed girls in ugly clothes

“Scarlet wondered if she had found a way to escape her fathers deadly games only to become a well costumed piece on a new game board” no shit Scarlett you came to the island for the game…

Also you were in such a hurry to find Tella and get into the game before it was too late and now you’re waxing poetic about how hot Julian is and how you’re hot but you don’t wanna be

Chapter 8

“Sage shaded colors of suspicion” I really hate this device she’s using. I’ve used it to describe the colors my mind reading characters see in people's minds. But it’s like twice a book, maybe, to express extreme emotion. Not every time your feelings change.

Some guy comes in and offers them a portal into caraval and Scarlett is like “sure thing” and Julian is like “ummm dumdum” and he leaves

The guys like “oh you just gonna listen to that random guy?” And I’m like as opposed to you, another random guy?

He wants her voice okay Ursula

“A passionate sky made of melting lemons and burning peaches” or say yellows and oranges…

“Until the door was no more” love this, sounds very fairy tale

She leaves and it's like night already, she only has til midnight

Scarlett and Julian get in by him pretending to be the count, her fiancé

They take the path of the players, not the watchers

Chapter 9

“A panicked Vermillion moved inside of her chest as she thought of how specific legends letter had been”

Julian admits he’s played caraval before and Scarlett is like *gasp* but HELLO how did you think he knew all the shit he knew?

He keeps calling her crimson like every time he speaks to her, annoying

“Julian’s smile turned seductive, all shameless curves and immoral promises”

Chapter 10

“Soft golden lights licked her arms with gentle kisses of warmth”

I’m very bored when this house is supposed to be EVERYTHING

The guy who was giving them the rules says, “don’t let your eyes or feelings trick you” And then jumps off the balcony and Scarlet freaks out… He just told you not to trust what you see

Scarlett is the most annoying person

Their instructions are to get to the end by sunrise or they’ll be locked out in the streets, but she’s wasting time wanting to look for her sister - and Julian is telling her that her sister is probably staying at the same place and she doesn’t believe him despite the fact that he’s already done this game before, just trust him???

“A searing green door watched Scarlet like a glowing eye”

This just made me figure out why I don’t like that she’s using colors as an emotional device, because the main character is named after a color, and so it’s just way too many color descriptors

Julian got trapped outside noooo

Chapter 11

But it’s fine because she tells the innkeeper they’re guests of legend - which they are - and he’s let in. Great. Glad there are no stakes. They also used legends name to get the boat to the inn for free.

The hallways in the inn “smelled like the end of the night, sweat and fading fire smoke mixed with lingering breath from words whose ghosts still haunted the air” no

Julian was “poison in an attractive bottle”

Their rooms are actually one room oops

Chapter 12

“But legend saw all during caraval”

She got a message from legend: it’s a key with tella’s name on it

Lmao tella is having sex behind that door for sure

“She felt five different shades of berry colored foolish” this is so stupid

Every time something happens between tella and scar, we get a whole expository moment about how this is related to their mother or their father or the relationship between the sisters… We know. we can tell. we are not stupid.

“Warmth licking her cheek” this metaphor is too specific to keep using it

Some tattooed dude finds her - Dante - and is like “sleep in my room”

He asks her out but she declines because the count

Damn her dress has transformed to be like see through which is why he was into her lmao

She has a dream that legend is a creep lol

Chapter 13

Scarlett totally changes her tune re: enjoying herself

She passes tella’s room and finds a wreck

“Feathers covered the carnage as if a rebel Angel had gone mad” this is so dumb

The key she got with tella’s name was a clue, that other people also got

A pregnant girl offers to help scarlet, and a man steals scarlets favorite earrings from her mother

Then the pregnant girl steals that stuff

She realizes there’s a postcard in tella’s room that isn’t hers

Chapter 14

Tella only loved mermaids, and the postcard is of a castle, which was Scarlett’s thing

The castle is a place on the isle that Julian recognizes

Dante shows up and Julian is like hell nah

Dante won last time Julian was here and it cost him a lot

“Shops wrapped in colors like a birthday presents, cerulean blue apricot orange saffron yellow primrose pink while the canals remained midnight dark” SHUT UP dude

This woman got like a color wheel or a color dictionary for her birthday the year she wrote this book

Time moves fast in the castle

What’s really annoying about this book is Stephanie Garber spends a lot of time talking about things that are boring, and one sentence on something like hummingbird-sized elephants and tigers

There’s a kissing tent and she’s like fuck yeah let’s go there

You’re engaged

Julian sees where she’s looking and is like yeah??

A tingle of periwinkle curiosity

Chapter 15

She goes into the tent of a half naked dude who could tell her fortune

This is all very boring

He has incense that makes people tell the truth and she admits Julian is the hottest guy ever

She asks what’s the man she will marry really like?

He’s not a good person

She’s covered in only pictures he can see instead of pictures only he can see…

She had 2 questions but the way she asked used them up so she doesn’t get to ask about tella

Chapter 16

He tells her to follow the boy with the heart made of black...obviously Dante, she thinks Julian

She walks into a potion tent and finds an elixir of protectio

She mentions her father and feels “anise and lavender and rotting plums”

She describe the woman who works in the potion tent as having “bottle green” eyes, but this entire paragraph has the word bottle in it like 1 million times because shes describing a tent full of potions...all these colorful words you’ve used and this is where you use “bottle green”

I don’t mind the descriptor, my own eyes are bottle green, it’s very vivid, but badly placed

She chases Julian to a decrepit garden with a fountain, and sees a glass button

She also saw a glass button in tella’s room...is this how legend spies on her? Is this where tella is being kept?

“Dreary yellow hopelessness” infected her

She sees the symbol of caraval inside the fountain and touches it, revealing a staircase

Someone screamed as hot and bright as fire

It’s madness tunnels

The inn “smells of laughter and boasts laced with sweetened ale” this doesn’t make seeeeeennnnnnnnse

She finds Julian, but it’s actually Dante and he’s mean to her and she cries but it makes her mad at Julian?????? Stupid

Chapter 17

Julian finally shows up, super bloody but he just had a head wound

She cleans him up and is getting super horny lol

He got her earrings back!!!!!

The fire dies sending up a plume of smoke “the color of things better said in whispers”

She tells him about the tunnels and he says legend treats his prisoners like guests

Julian’s eyes are the color of “caramel and liquid amber lust”

He almost kisses her and then seems to wake up, leaves and “disappointment wraps around her in cool shades of forget me not blue” STOP

Chapter 18

She wakes up to white roses with red tips

Julian is supposed to meet her but doesn’t

A girl shows up “pretty as a watercolor and dressed as bold as a trumpet” DUDE

“Oh poor you, here you are on a magical island, and all you can think of is what you don’t have” get her!

Dante shows up and she realizes he has a black heart tattoo which DUH SCARLETT

chapter 19

The night is “brittle, crisp like the first bite of a chilled apple, smelling just as sweet with hints of burnt sugar weaving through the charcoal night air” THIS IS GOOD PURPLE PROSE! I can taste this!!!!!!!

She’s chasing Dante and finds a cider seller who’s drink will help her see things more clearly, the price is her last lie

She drinks it and loses the color in her vision

The game is constantly working against you?????? How?! You’ve stumbled across tons of clues without any work and there are no believable stakes to this game, this drink is the first time you’ve had a struggle…

Iko holds a journal that’s brownish green, “the color of forgotten memories, abandoned dreams, and bitter gossip”

Even in black and white we get this heavy handed color shit

She realizes anything in color is important

She also sees the red roses on a carousel and the red cravat on a mans neck

He makes her feel perilous shades of silky black - is Stephanie Garner an artist? Does she have synesthesia or something?? What is with this device!!!!

She looks in Iko’s book and sees pictures of her, the special guest

Sour shades of yellow green made her stomach roil with trepidation - HUH????

She’s like “why would he make the game about me?” You’ve been begging him to bring you caraval your entire life, why do you think?

I think I remember the nana saying annelise had blonde hair, and so does tella...are they related to her? Is she nana?

Iko tells her the notebook also holds all the true stories of caraval

Iko will give her the notebook if Scarlett will buy 2 dresses because the changing dress bothers her (??)

Iko takes her to a dress shop where the dresses are “the color of late night laughter, early morning sunshine, and waves crashing around ankles”

The dresses cost nightmares or secrets or fears

She owes her worst fear and greatest desire, or she can pay 2 days of her life per dress

It works but her greatest desire isn’t to find her sister, so she pays with 2 days of her life, not at the end of her life but at the end of caraval

“Panic came in hemlock green, the color of poison and terror”

“Something acidic and moldy and burnt bubbled up in Scarlett’s throat - the taste of death” like this

Scarlett’s body dies but her mind will exist in a dream world

Chapter 20

Dante finds her and drags her into the inn

Julian hits Dante because he won’t let her go hell yeah

She tells him what happened

Julian tried to give Scarlett a day of his life by having her drink his blood from his finger and she’s like “I wanna fuck this duuuude”

“His voice is so gentle, made of gentle” I liked this

Then he drinks her blood from her finger, and the world shatters into a million shards of colored glass

He lays down with her and holds her while she dies

Chapter 21

Death was the color purple.

She sees tella in the dream world, and tella has a huge dark book that swallows her and Scarlett

They see young nana in a house similar to the one they entered at caraval, entwined with a young man

Her grandma is Anneliese DUH

Then she’s at the funeral of the woman who died at caraval before

Rosa was in love with legend and he rejected her so she killed herself

Dante was rosa’s fiancée

Legend is julian?!?!?

Loved This entire chapter but then it means nothing because none of this is real it’s all part of the game so it’s not really story development

Chapter 22

They both wake up

Scarlett tries to convince herself the game is messing with her

Then she remembers what the dream people said about legend loving to make girls fall for him

She has a grey streak in her hair now

Her dad is there!

She finally puts it together - her nana is anneliese

“She could see the sting of her rejection in shades of stormy blue ghosting over his heart like sad morning mist” roll my eyes

But then she remembers that he gave a day of his life for her and is like why would he do that if he was legend

Now she’s changed her mind, so she goes after Julian to find him leaving Dante’s room and walking into tella’s

She goes in after him to hide from her dad but the room is empty

She finds another secret staircase like the fountain

She trips over Dante’s dead body and finds Julian standing over it

Chapter 23

Julian grabs her and is like “I didn't kill him, we were working together”

He shows her a white rose tattoo he has, Rosa was his sister!!

She asks why he had been acting weird and he basically says he didn’t want to have feelings for her because that wasn’t why he had come to caraval

Scarlett is like let’s get this fucker back, but she hears her dad’s footsteps in the tunnel

Chapter 24

They start running, and they hide in a weird alcove from her dad that starts to squish them

She realizes it’s feeding off their fear so they relax and it lets them out

They end up in the sand tunnel and Scarlett is like how could you know I was going to caraval if you were already at our island when I got my tickets

Julian explains that legend is punishing the descendants of anneliese and he invited her to caraval to stop the wedding

Legend had never responded until she signed her full name on the last letter, mentioning her wedding

Julian is the fucking count dude calling it

“His steady gaze reached out to the broken parts of her like a caress, a type of touch that moved through damaged flesh, past fractured bones and into a person's wounded soul.” WOW

Scarlett hears tella’s voice and almost runs straight off a cliff

“Tella loved danger the same way candle wicks loved to burn. It never seemed to scare her that some of the things she lusted for might consume her like a flame” Christ

Julian knew tella would be taken during caraval

Chapter 25

She had to find tella before legend consumed her like a flame burning a candle” you just used a candle metaphor like one page ago my dude.

She gives herself one minute to cry and scream and Julian hears her so he barges in, worried

He apologizes and she gives him the grace I’ve been waiting for as soon as he said he knew what would happen to tella: he had to avenge his sister. Everything they’re both doing is for their sisters, she should be more understanding

Julian is “all kinds of tragic and lovely”

The box was “flat black, the color of failure and funerals” shut UP

Like if you wanna use the color device to describe your protagonists feelings stop being so fucking flowery with every single color in the book it is soooooooooooooooo distracting

It’s the other dress Scarlett has bought but now it’s white

Chapter 26

There’s a note in the box from legend that makes “invisible spiders crawl over her skin” ok

She thinks the dress is the 5th clue - the buttons on the dress reminds her of the buttons leading to the hat store

Chapter 27

They go to the top hat place and Julian is like “this is all wrong”

Iko appears looking like “a teardrop the moon had cried” love it

She tells them not to go into the hat shop

Let me guess, despite both of these omens Scarlett is still gonna go in

“Scarlett had an emerald green premonition that she would make a discovery inside” sure why tf not gotta keep the story moving somehow

She sees the store owner and was like LEGEND and he’s like nah dude I’m just wearing a hat

But he is the guy that was wearing the red cravat and eyepatch from the day her vision went gray

He is the count!!!!!

Chapter 28

Nicholas Darcy

And her dad is there!!!!!!!!!!

Julian gets her out but the count chases her and they get on a boat

She sees her dad and he looks afraid but she blames it on the rain

They row to the castle and Julian convinces her to get inside to hide from the lightning

And they argue about if she’s still planning marrying the count and she’s torn which hurts him

He says “are you sure you want this?” Before kissing her and like is it a consent thing or is it him asking if he’s what she wants either way I love it

“The boy who had saved her from drowning in more ways than one” explain…

They kiss and “every touch created colors she had never seen” that’s so anticlimactic

Chapter 29

The stones fall through the hourglass like “drops of falling rose petals” that makes no sense but we have to include it because...

She finally realizes the roses that have been EVERYWHERE are part of the game duh

She takes Julian to the fountain where the tunnel entrance is

She feels ochre shades of uneasy

Only NOW she’s giving pause at the idea of winning because she could wish them safe...shoulda been your goal all along. Should have been equally as important as finding tella since if you find her you win the wish….I’m signing heavily atm

The governor and the count are there!!!!!

Swear to god if Julian dies I’m going to fucking riot

She wants to split up but Julian is like fuck no

The count catches up to her and the governor pulls her by her hair up the stairs

He punches her in the stomach to warn Julian and she gets back up, with the count trying to protect Scarlett

“A slick mud colored feeling coated Scarlett’s insides” because the governor is holding a knife to Julian’s throat

He cuts Julian’s face NOOOOOO

The governor takes Julian to his room and let’s the count sleep in Scarlett’s room because “he’s already paid for her, he can enjoy her a few days early”

Scarlett stands up to her dad!!!! And then she remembers tella’s words: what if the count is worse?

Scarlett tells the count if she makes her dad stop, she’ll be a good wife but if he doesn’t she will never be his obedient wife

“Do you really want a bride who will only sleep with you because someone will be tortured if she doesn’t?” YES

Chapter 30

The count is like “listen I am NOT like your dad I’m sorry” and she’s like yeah but you’re not Julian

The count starts undressing and Scarlett aims a poker at his eyeball lmao

She finally remembers the elixir of protection in that dress from the tent and soaks the count

The count is like “you’re playing into legends hands” and Scarlett is like “nah he did me a favor by getting rid of you”

Chapter 31

Julian’s cut isn’t that deep thank god but he’s still woozy

“He tasted like midnight and wind”

Leap of faith - roses - it’s Rosa!!!!! She has to ask how Rosa died and Julian says she jumped off a balcony

They decide to sneak out using the tunnels to go search all the balconies

Chapter 32

The town during the day looks like a “faded memory”

She hears music from the rose colored carousel

The musician has been asking for coins the whole time but nothing else cost money

They jump onto the moving carousel and end up in the roses where Scarlett finds the caraval symbol

They have to jump, Julian gives her coordinates to a boat in case they get separated but they run out of time and she has to go in

She lands in a river and lands at a staircase guarded with statues that are definitely frozen people

Legend is there ofc

Chapter 33

She’s a little star struck by legend

His laugh is a rich spicy sound that echoes until he snaps his fingers

Homeboy is mad

Julian ends up there, dry, and...he’s working with legend...NOOOOOOO

Dante and Valentina were also part of the game

Rosa was not his sister...DUDE

She clutches his pocket watch and legend opens it - Julian’s voice comes out apologizing for betraying her

He does love her HE IS ENCHANTED!!!!!

LEGEND STABS JULIAN?!?!?!?!?!?

Oh fuck he is spitting blood oh fuck oh no

Scarlett you got him killed you dumdum

Chapter 34

I’m FUCKING FURIOUS

she remembers that she gets one wish, and she wants to use it to bring Julian back and I swear to goooooddddddd if he doesn’t come back I’m gonna throw myself out the window

Legend is gone, leaving a funeral invitation for tella set for tomorrow this guy is a MONSTER

Chapter 35

She ends up on a huge rooftop way high up

“The air felt soft and poisonous”

Tella is there feeling like “softness and sunlight and seeds for growing dreams”

We just used soft a sentence ago!!!!

Tella is like “you’re confused, the game is playing tricks on you”

Scarlett tells her about their grandmas history with legend

She shows tella the invitation and it now says it’s to a party not a funeral

Chapter 36

Tella has met a boy that’s not legend...it’s a guy she met right before she got taken for the game…

She’s engaged to him??

Scarlett is like maybe tella is right and this is all part of it...Scarlett DUDE

Scarlett has a bitter yellow puddle of dread in her stomach

If Daniel is Dante or Julian I’m gonna scream

Chapter 37

It’s legend of course

Duh

He tries to convince tella to tie Scarlett up you better NOT

TELLA

YOU DUMB BITCH

legend dares Scarlett to walk to the edge of the balcony to prove she loves her sister, so that he can feign worry to tella

They tie her up

The governor and the count show up FUCK

finally legend admits to tella who he is and she just breaks poor baby

Tella backs up to the ledge and says if the governor or the count touch Scarlett she’ll kill herself!!!!!!!

“Silver slippers sliding” toward the balcony

Scarlett breaks free but tella FUCKING JUMPS

Chapter 38

So now who is Scarlett gonna use her wish on?!

Her father looks like “a dragon with no fire and broken wings”

The governor slaps Jovan and legend is like imma fuck you UP

The governor killed Dante!!!!!!

She blackmails her dad with Philippe’s death

She remembers her wish...but who does she use it on?!

Which oof, oof, OOF

Tella is a brat lmao

Legend won’t give her the wish!!!!!

He’s...fading??

Scarlett goes to give tella her blood

She wishes her impossible wish but it doesn’t work

Chapter 39

She goes back up to get tella’s stuff and finds a caraval box with a letter inside from tella to legend that she didn’t know about

Chapter 40

She goes to see legend and finds out he’s actually some dude named Caspar…that was why he couldn’t grant her wish

There’s a stack of letter between tella and legend that basically illustrate that tella was willing to die for legend to get them to caraval

Tella is alive?!?!?!?!?!?

This was all a fucking game?!

Her impossible wish came true, but she had actually died

Tella orchestrated their dad getting to caraval so he could see her die, and so he would leave Scarlett alone

Chapter 41

So Julian is not really dead, but tella wanted anyone who made Scarlett love them to be taken out, that way she wouldn’t get hurt by someone who was just pretending

So she somehow warps this into meaning that Julian didn’t actually love her? Go...ask him??????? The fuck

God poor Scarlett…

So people can die in caraval, but when the game is over, they come back...so there were no fuckin stakes except for tella’s death

Chapter 42

They go to legends party in the forest and Scarlett sees Julian

Iko is there like go talk to Julian dumdum

“Shades of the rich ruby love she’d felt mixed with deep indigo hurt turning everything just a little bit violet” I don’t care I want them to kiss Stephanie

Julian is so hurt that she thinks she doesn’t know him

He’s related to legend…

Rosa dying changed his opinion of legend

He tried to leave the game right before this caraval

Legend is his brother!!!!!!!!!

He couldn’t leave Scarlett because she loved her sister like Julian loved his brother

He stayed because of Scarlett despite how it hurt him to lie to her

Yaaaaaay they kiss yay omg

Epilogue

Tella is dancing drunk at the party and is dancing with a new guy who dances her to the edge of the party...then he’s gone?

He dropped something into her pocket...a coin with a note…

From legend!!!!!

You can see your mom soon if you keep up your end of the bargain!!!!!

#book review #bookreviews #booktube #cringe books #cringe review #stephanie garber #caraval #legendary #finale #negative review #spoilers

4 notes · View notes

alphabees-writes · 4 years

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Glee - S1 E6 (Vitamin D)

They call it vitamin D for the whole thing but wasn’t it just a component for some really hard drug??? We love the bullshit

The millionth step ball change... And we’re only 6 episodes in

Mr Schue just said “Maybe so” and now all I can think of is the gif meme thing

heheheheheheh.......Sorry. Funny youtube.

Sign #27 That Mr Schuester Is An Asshole: He’s eating that sandwich in the GROSSEST WAY POSSIBLE. He’s chewing with his mouth open, breathing really loud, talking with his mouthful, and he’s clearly being messy about it because there’s mustard all over his chin!!! How is Emma crushing on this dweeb

Sign #28 That Mr Schuester Is An Asshole: When Emma says he’s got a “cute Kirk Douglas chin dimple” (barf) he doesn’t say, hey! Maybe don’t flirt with me, I’m married!

I’m genuinely starting to feel ill whenever I have to just look at Mr Schue...

Everybody trying to learn their choreo and they’re just.... Spinning. Kurt’s about to fall over, Matt and Mike are bumping into each other, and Brittany’s just Tasmanian Devil-ing her way across the room. Love em

Brittany completely ignoring Artie’s high-five and him being like “oh-- okay...” is underrated

Matt Morrison just delivered “simply stopped trying” really weirdly. I don’t know what’s throwing me off about it, but it is

You’re right, Sue. Bones won’t grow properly without fear. AND EMMA’S BLOUSE IS INSANE

“I don’t understand how lightning is in competition with an above-ground swimming pool” You’re RIGHT KURT and you SHOULD SAY IT! Bears and sharks aren’t in competition either! Call out post for Mr Schue: The man knows NOTHING of the most basic ecology!

The look Quinn gives Finn when he yawns... Let my mans nap!!!

Kurt did his best to get to the girl’s side. Can you fucking blame him? Puck’s still an asshole to him as far as we all know!

Santana and Brittany just casually linking arms... Be still my beating heart

Kurt just walking along with Finn to football practice... Look at those brothers go!!! I am ignoring Puck

Ohh Sue’s journal... A wonderful character

You’re right, Sue, Will Schuester IS to blame for the world’s problems. Please do destroy the man

“I’ve always thought the desire to procreate showed deep personal weakness” Got ‘em

And thus begins the saga of Sue pushing problem people down the stairs. I’m not saying she should do that to Mr Schue... I’m just saying, why doesn’t she?

If Will wasn’t flirting with Emma, he wouldn’t get all nervous and upset when his wife turns up. Them’s the facts.

Does Terri know about Emma’s germophobia...? Because if so, it’s probably not cool for Will to have told her that. Unless Sue did, but I wouldn’t put it past him

As if they could get away with hiring a random unqualified woman as a school nurse?

Is “route” really pronounced like that......? Huh

Finn getting Biofreeze in his eye will forever be hilarious.

LEVEL 2!!!

I hate hats. I don’t know why, but I do. And I want Kurt to live his best life, but man, I hate that hat

Cory Monteith really got paid to drool. Goals

“Puck, with respect, you’re more helpful when you don’t contribute” Tell him, Artie!!!

Everybody making fun of Quinn :C Britt, you’re better than this!!

People (I’m people) can hate on Rachel all they want but this scenario is one example of her actually working harder than anybody else in the group. Yes, the solos should be shared more equally, but it’s hard to be mad at her when the others are claiming her ideas as their own and sitting around when they should be rehearsing. Except Brittany! She’s stretching, at least, love her

Terri let him NAP. WITHOUT DRUGS.

Finn’s having some serious mental health concerns but he’s not getting what he needs and I hate it. Help him!!!

Why does Terri care if Finn’s not faithful? Like, yeah, he should be, but it’s not going to affect the baby!

Surely if she took those pills for ALL of high school, they would’ve lost their effect after a while?

God I love high Finn. He just CHUCKED Matt outta that chair.

Puck knows what’s up. Kurt thinks it’s vitamin C, because Vogue said so, and Iove him. He also looks SO weirded out

Terri gave him a whole BOX huh?

Time for season 1′s best mash-up. I love this so much. They’re all going so HARD and Finn looks like his eyes are about to pop right out. The way he’s rubbing the mic... How could they not tell he was off his face???

MIKE’S SINGING. MIKE’S SINGING BACK UP AND NOBODY’S WINCING. Glee has no continuity confirmed

I feel like I shouldn’t find this performance cute because they’re all meant to be high as shit BUT THEY’RE JUST SO EXCITED???

Kevin McHale bumps every song features in up by at least 2 letter grades and that’s just a fact

LET MIKE CHANG DANCE!!!! LET HIM DANCE FOREVER HE DESERVES SO MUCH

I would say the same for Matt but then I’ll get sad about him being dumped into the void in like 16 episodes time

Oh Rachel worrying about Quinn... Be still my gay heart

Rachel just cuts right through her bullshit without hesitating for a second. She knows what it’s like to feel like the odd one out and she’s doing the absolute most to make sure Quinn doesn’t feel that way and I love her for it

The way Quinn slowly turns to face her... And Rachel says they don’t have to be enemies and Quinn can’t understand why Rachel would offer her a second chance...

Quinn legit draws porn of Rachel it’s canon. I mean it’s fucked up but there are only so many reasons a person would do that

“I would’ve tortured you if the roles were reversed you know” “I know” And then the way she watches Rachel walk away... My HEART

Ken and Terri, the power duo of awful

“Laughing... Talking... All the stuff she never does with me” I hate it. They suck. Emma is a dumbass for agreeing to date a guy who she just genuinely doesn’t like and Ken’s just an ASSHOLE for bullying her into it

And now Ken’s about to propose because he’s being bullied into it. Why the fuck does this happen?

I don’t buy that Rachel took this long to berate all the girls for not prepping their mash-up harder after the boys killed theirs. She’d be right on that

Kurt I love the waistcoat and the bowtie but WHAT is happening on your ELBOWS.

You really wanted those guys in cornrows, Kurt? None of them have the length for it. ALSO I love that the exotic bird feathers thing comes back next season 10/10

F-ROD!!! GO OFF RACHEL!!! Even if Finn doesn’t know what half these words mean!

Rachel really wakes up with flawless hair, huh! And then she just... Does all that. She never stops being extra...

Did they just start walking in the opposite direction?

I feel like it’s dumb that Rachel doesn’t just tell Mr Schue that they all took pills, but it’s more in character for her to not waste an opportunity to perform anyway

Howard Bamboo,totally unqualified man who absolutely isn’t staff, is just allowed on campus to deliver DRUGS? HELLO???

Quinn only gets folic acid... And yet I’m pretty sure she manages to keep up with everybody else. HOW?

“What’s up with Ken?” [FRANTIC PAPER SHREDDING]

I don’t care how married you are, no person should lick another person’s face

I can physically feel the awkwardness between Will and Terri. JUST DIVORCE ALREADY

Don’t like ya Will but you’re right, shit’s not healthy if there’s no space!

Imagine proposing in the staff room at work just because a random woman told you to

“Emma Pilsbury, this is not an engagement ring” “Oh thank god--” “No, I mean, it is” Just take the L, Ken

AND ALSO ANGELS!!!

Quinn’s so fucking concerned. I love this

I usually don’t like yellow clothes but these girls make it look so dang CUTE. More pastels plz

Again, I have no idea how pregnant Quinn is keeping up at all...

HALOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Kurt’s wearing those blocky shades so the boys can’t see his betrayal

Where the hell did this mock-stage set up come from

“We came up with the idea together!” No... Will, that was Sue. Sue gave you the idea

Emma’s pretty much explicitly told Will she’s only marrying Ken because Will won’t be with her. EVERYBODY SUCKS

This argument between Terri and Emma is a nightmare. The most confrontational person VS the least... I’d fucking evaporate if Terri came at me like that

The way Emma’s voice shakes when she tells Terri that Will deserves better... Ouchie

Quinn is just adorable. Diana made this character, and she did such an amazing job... She’s more empathetic than she lets anybody realise

The fact that Terri won’t even help this TEENAGE GIRL pay for the baby that she’ll eventually adopt is a nightmare. Where do you expect her to get the cash from?

Wanting to get married without being married is kind of a mood... Secret marriage

BEING A PUSHOVER WHEN IT COMES TO YOU DOESN’T MAKE HIM A GOOD MAN

Finn and Rachel both realising they screwed up is perfect.

Finn continuing to not know what any words mean is also perfect

This is a cute Rachel moment actually... Yes girl compete WITH your friends!!! You’re a team!!!!

Ahh, methamphetamines! That’s what it was. Yeah, fuck Terri

I’m still looking at Matt Morrison’s lips and trying to figure out if he’s had fillers. They just curl too far!!!

Mr Schue being called out for making things too competitive - fine, I guess. Bringing in SUE to rectify that...??? Hello? Figgins?

Those white jeans are a LOOK Kurt. He’s like a twink Steve Jobs rn

Britt and Santana’s little smiles at each other when Sue’s announced as co-captain... Hell yeah future wives

I’d like to think Will’s upset about Emma marrying Ken for the right reasons (i.e. Ken’s an asshole) but we been knew he’s not. He’s looking at her like he’s just been shot

AIN’T NOTHIN GONNA BREAK MY STRIDE! NOBODY GONNA SLOW ME DOWN! OH NO, I’VE GOT TO KEEP ON MOVIN!

I really just love how stupid this show is! It makes no god damn sense and I fall for it every time!

#Glee #Glee Season 1 #Rosie watches things and then says things about the thing

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someone-elses-star · 5 years

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The 100 6x10: Matryoshka Personal Narrative

Here we go again! I hope this week went by as quick for you as it did for me! I’m super excited to see this episode--but nervous because I heard that there might be a major character death? I mean....we just lost Kane next week? Why would they do that to us again?! Any speculations? I’ve been hearing that it might be Raven (though that seems off-plot from this season) and I’ve also been hearing Octavia (but she’s in the next episode so maybe later this season, but definitely not tonight). Also, BOB DIRECTS NEXT EPISODE!!! I’m so jazzed for that!

Love you Eliza! They can’t kill you off if you’re the only one who introduces the upcoming episodes! Lmao

Haha the reminders showing us yesterday about Bellamy being super in love with Clarke and her return. Like we need that reminder. We have been replaying that scene all week!

Love Clarke on the motorcycle.

Uh oh! Who’s on the other motorcycles?

Our head? Our head?

You tell her Clarke!

Damn Josephine knows her away around no matter how many years she’s been gone.

Anybody reminded of the bunker on Earth from season 1 to this one? You know the one where we all started shipping Bellarke? Lol

Ohhh....bringing up the Josephine/Gabriel relationship.

Wow. Josephine actually seems human when talking about him.

Damn.....Clarke is seizing. Damn, she is sorta worried about Clarke, but....still mostly worried about saving her own ass. Not surprised.

Ope! Here is where Raven and Abby find out Clarke is “dead.”

Russell is out for their heads. His own doing, really.

Yeah, Raven. Look guilty and mournful for Clarke!

So Simone said that to hurt them for hurting her?

Yes, Russell, you’re fault. But not for letting them in. For trying to kill Clarke.

Awwww....calling Madi Clarke’s daughter always gets to me!

Wow. Simone is out for BLOOD!

Just like them? You are worse than them!

Oh god?! Who are they going to kill?!?!

Oh. Telling people the truth! Good for him!

Do I hear the sounds of rebellion?

Gaia and Echo teamwork! We are getting almost all the spoiler scenes in the first ten minutes, are we? Damn.

REBELLION! REBELLION!

Rebellion is never really peaceful, though, is it?

You tell him Echo! Haha

Wow. Make them choose who dies? Extra cruel.

Plan B. Always have a Plan B.

I love Echo. I do. I may not like her and Bellamy together romantically, but I really, really LOVE her!

Wow Gaia. Put on the pressure.

That’s easy....Murphy. Yup.

You tell him Madi!

Ohh....The truth is coming out!

Abby is going to kill him!

Eventually.....lol. Emori.

Abby totally giving him the slap.

You tell him, Abby!

Commercial Break #1 Thoughts: Honestly, I haven’t liked Abby this season, or most seasons, but it’s nice to see her acting like a real mother again. And also, I love Murphy, but he gets off wayyyyy too easy most time. Do I want him dead? NO! Do I agree that he would be the one to choose....don’t hate me!....but probably so. He did betray them and all. He did the right thing in the end. Sure. But mostly through a lot of outside pressure, and he probably would have gone through with it if Josephine didn’t stab him in the leg and shit. He’s very into saving his own ass.

Is Josephine really singing....that song? Lol

Ohhh....back in the mind stuff! And it is MESSY and falling apart!

Ohhh their memories are mixing now! That is definitely not good! Way to really push the point that Clarke’s brain is deteriorating.

Not much. Yes, I would definitely concur.

Ohhh. Her second body really didn’t want to be taken!

Josephine is actually scared. Good.

I love Clarke with a plan!

Hmmm....I hope those memories aren’t important....

Our brain, now Clarke? This is scaring me that she keeps saying “our.”

Leave it to Raven to put Clarke through hell and then give Murphy an easy talk.

So did Gaia purposely get taken?

Madi is ANGRY!

The only person dying tonight is Russell. How come I don’t agree?

Wow. Very tense lunchtime.

Is Ty good....or bad?

Ohhhhh is Ty going to get himself killed because he can’t wait for the rebellion?

OH....is Simone going to die? Good riddance? I suppose....? Yup. Dead.

No wonder Russell is going to be out for blood this episode. His poor choices are leading to his whole family’s demise.

Commercial Break #2 Thoughts: Is anyone actually feeling bad for the Primes? I mean, I’m not, but I want to know if there is anyone out there still thinking they are good when their whole brainwashing shit is coming out. Bring on the rebellion! And seriously, already halfway through the episode? I feel, like usual, that we’ve got a lot, but still not enough. I really hope the last few episodes are not rushed because of this. That would suck. I know we’ll get a cliffhanger-ish thing like we usually do, but I hope it is after some real plot growth. Also, so we are probs not going to see Bellamy this episode? Is that what’s happening? Because next to episodes descriptions are all Bellamy/Octavia descriptions which makes me worry also about Clarke’s health. I see Eliza’s name in the cast section of both, but....still worried.

Ope. Josephine and Gabriel memories in different bodies!

Aww.....that’s so cute. I still hate her. And this is so the start of Gabriel’s hate for the Prime system.

Clarke is so sympathizing. She needs to stop being so nice.

Wow. They’re bonding. Damn. Fuck. Fine. Save them both, but give Clarke back her body. And let her live, of course.

And here is Josephine with an ax. That’s not good. Definitely can’t not trust the psychopath.

And....there goes Josephine. But...Clarke is still inside? How? Is Josephine gone completely now? Or is she awake in Clarke’s body?

And uh oh! Killer vines!

Commercial Break #3 Thoughts: Don’t have many thoughts because that was not a lot before the next set of commercials. But I think we’re somehow seeing Josephine awake somehow? Like, why was it her who regained control when her memories were wiped? And what does this mean for Clarke’s survival? Especially when I’m convinced Josephine was going to use that ax against Clarke? Meaning she can STILL definitely NOT be trusted to keep any sort of deal in keeping them both alive. Josephine is definitely the female Murphy--a little more psycho, yes, but still valid.

At least those commercials didn’t last.

And here is the body being choked! And Gabriel and Octavia to the rescue!

Nope....Josephine. Not Clarke.

Oh. He does still love her. That’s not good.

Yeah, Octavia. Ask about Clarke! Save Clarke!

Wow. This is such a mess!

Damn. You guys didn’t honestly think that she was to be trusted.

You go Bellamy!

“Because of course it is!” What sass!

Blake reunion!

You tell her Bellamy! Protect Clarke, Octavia, and your people. In that order if you don’t mind!

Gaia and Madi confrontation!

Wow Madi is really going bad! Save her!

Yes! Abby is talking sense!

That’s what you get for letting a child become Heda!

Damn. Shedheda was horrible!

Wow Abby is really going full on mother hen now!

Raven asking the right questions! Good girl!

And this is where we are going to get Madi’s exorcism scene next week!

Ohh....the child is spared, but all the others are burned?

Very witch trials.

Commercial Break #4 Thoughts: Madi is fully gone now. Gotta get that exorcism done. Which is totally next week in Bob’s directorial debut episode next week! SO EXCITED! Which from the behind the scenes pics seems to have Jackson in it, so if he survives the burning at the stake thing, I’m thinking everyone else will, too. Just a theory, but Echo has got to come through in some aspect. And also, with some help from the rebellious people who have already been told the truth? Well. here comes the last fifteen minutes. The last five minutes of all this season’s episodes have been intense, so I wonder what the last five will bring this episode. I’m nervous. And excited. But mostly nervous as always. This show is totally going to make me go prematurely grey!

Russell giving his dictatorship speech. Gotta have it.

Echo is totally ready.

You tell them Emori!

Very witch trials.

Damn it, Riker! What the hell?!? Can’t trust any of these bastards.

The chick on the motorcycle is going to save them last moment. Calling it.

Or.....Murphy will save them?

Hmmmm....he’s considering it.

And....now they’re safe? Again?

Ohhh....and Raven is going to use the computer to erase Madi’s bad side.

But they are still going to burn the guy who killed Simone. Typical.

I could see that coming a mile away. Gotta keep everyone in fear of the Primes.

Commercial Break #5 Thoughts: Fear is what keeps the people under control. Biggest sign of a dictatorship. And further proof that the Primes are the real bad guys here. Even Russell in his best moments has always been a brainwashing dictator playing himself off as a god. Also, last five minutes are coming up! Always the most intense! Does anyone else believe this is when we will find if Clarke is going to live or die. I really would stop watching if she died. She’s the show for me.

SAVE CLARKE Gabriel!

Stop with the heart eyes! Only Bellamy and Clarke can have heart eyes!

She was right to depend on you.

Gabriel making hard decisions.

He better still save Clarke!

Either that, or the Blake’s will probably kill him.

Bellamy is seriously pissed. Save his Clarke!

Damn right, Gabriel! The only one who can be trusted I think. Maybe.

Death is life. Very poetic.

And Clarke is now seeing her mind breaking apart.

Okay. Save her! Save her now! I’m scared! Restart her heart!

Why is she still here!?

WHAT?!?!?!?!

IS she really killing Clarke?

Oh God.

Heart and the head. Hear and the head!

Save her Bellamy! This is love!

Is that the only kiss we are only ever going to see?

Damn....are we really losing Clarke?

Oh my god. My heart seriously was stopping and racing!

The head and the heart! This is so a love confession!

THAT WAS A LOVE CONFESSION!!!!!

My hands are still shaking from thinking that they were really killing off Clarke!

#The 100 #the 100 spoilers #bob morely #eliza tayor #bellamy blake #clarke griffin #octavia blake #bellarke #john murphy #emori #echo #raven reyes #abby griffin #jackson #madi griffin #matryoshka #6x10

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eerythingisshaka · 6 years

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The Coffee Prince Pt. 2

(T’Challa x Reader)

*Part 1*

Word Count: 3k

Plot: Stuck in your ways of living, one day at the coffee shop, you run into a tall dark roast that threatens to wake you up from your romantic hibernation.

*Previously*

You are unphased and not listening when you get up and see this 6’0 man picking up his drink and turning towards you. He makes his way to the side table, and your heart literally stops pumping for a split second from the anxiety. He hasn’t seen you yet and he could easily leave very soon without your acknowledgment, What if he doesn’t recognize you? The L’s you could take outweigh the dubs by a mile.

You get up to go get an unnecessary sugar packet.

“Excuse me,” you say.

He looks to you and gives you a crooked smile.

“Ahh, how are you today, Ms. Macchiato.” He says while stirring his coffee.

You spontaneously start ovulating at his title for you. He remembered your order, and made it a pet name for you!

You smile goofily as your heart threatens to fall out of your chest, “Yeah, that’s me! How have you been….Thomas?” Your voice rises an octave as you coyly played like you couldn’t remember one of the few things tied to him from your one engagement.

He furrows his brow at your statement. “Ohh, you must have me confused with some other American coffee drinker.”

“Oh? So that accent makes you from where, Boston?”

You both laugh. Your mouth is getting dry from anxiety, so you sip your drink.

“Gah! Fuck!” You sputter some of the liquid down your chin, tongue hanging out fanning it. The drink was scalding hot still.

‘Thomas’ gets a napkin and hands it to you, concern clouds his face.

“Are you all right? Should I go get you some water or…”

Heated with embarrassment noe more than the coffee, you shake your head trying to speak clearly. “It’th fine, thankth.” You say with a scalded tongue.

“Please, sit a moment. I’ll be right back.” He touches your arm to guide you back to a table and makes his way to the register. You keep fanning yourself, mortified by your not so graceful behavior.

“Ok, come on, get your thit together. You are a queen goddeth. Anyone would be lucky to dick you down proper.”

You take a deep breath and look off to one side and see an old white woman shaking her head looking at you. Of course that last sentence would come out clear as a bell, but you gave her a look of ‘and?’ while she continued eating her oatmeal.

‘Thomas’ comes back with cold Fiji water, cracking it open before handing it to you.

You take it in you hand with shock clearly displayed cross your face, ‘Thomas’ sits down across from you and notices your expression immediately.

“Is something wrong with it? Is something in it?” He leans to look at the bottle clutched in the hand.

Why did he have to be so cute when he scrunches his face with worry? You snap out of it and try to relax again. “No, it’th juth uh, you know they have free water cupth, right? Like, you didn’t have to pay for one”

He waves his hand in protest, “It’s nothing. I mean, you don’t need lukewarm tap water, this is better for you.”

You say before taking a sip, “Well that was very thweet of you. I owe you one.”

“Don’t worry about that. I can’t standby while you’re in pain. Though, the temporary speech impediment is kind of cute, I must say.”

“What do you mean? Thith ith my real voice. I wath juth trying to impreth you with perfect diction last time.” You say, blowing your coffee, batting your eyes.

He chuckles, “Right, and I’m from Boston.”

You smile and look out the window for a second. The high you feel from being in his company makes it hard to come back down to the reality that you have to make conversation, and you’re suddenly lost for words. You want to know more about him but don’t want to come off as nosy or interrogative, or too eager, though you could smile at him giddily all damn day But this is a cute guy, who is clearly attentive, splurging on some fresh H2O. Ask him something! Get some personal shit out the way!

You face him to see his round, gorgeous eyes looking at you. You can’t read his expression before he looks down at his coffee again.

“What is your name, by chance? I don’t think I got it before.” he asks before puckering his lips, that look like they’ve never known ash, to take a sip.

“Oh, it’s (Y/N)” you say.

“Ah, (Y/N) that’s a beautiful name. It doesn’t seem too difficult to me.”

You practically melt at him saying your name. You’d never want a different one long as those lips spoke it.

“Well, it shouldn’t be. But people sense something has more than 2 syllables and their mind just flips.”

“Does it have any meaning behind it?”

“Mmm, not that I know. I’d have to Google. But all I know is my mom just liked it. But what about you, ‘Thomas’?” You say with a goofy grin, resting your chin on your hand.

“Yes, my name is T’Challa.”

“T….Challa?”

“Yes, that’s right! First try!” He holds his hand up for a high five.

The world seems to go into slow motion when connecting your palm to his. His hand is a skyscraper compared to yours, trying to memorize the feel of his hand through the little contact you had.

“What can I say, I’m a pro!”

“Very nice. Impaired tongue and all!” He pauses a moment before continuing, “Have you got time for a walk around to get some air? It’s so beautiful outside. May be nice…”

You look at your phone and see you should've been back at your desk 15 min ago.

“Uh… actually I do need to go…”

“Bast! Well that’s ok. Maybe our paths can cross again in the future?”

Your face fallen, “Yeah, hopefully so. Thanks again for the water…”

You start to get up and leave, “Ah, Miss (Y/N)?”

You turn to him, “Mhm?”

“Do you think I could call you sometime? If it’s not too forward, we could arrange meeting outside of your work hours so it’s more convenient?”

You heart jumped into your throat at the proposal. He’s asking for your number!

“Sure thing! I would love that. Just let me know or I’ll call you whichever. Cool!”

You back up to leave before you add anymore positive phrases to your long phrase affirming his invitation.

You step out the door of the shop and do a little Tiffany Haddish ‘she ready’ dance. You couldn’t wait to fill Tavia in on the details. T’Challa, T’Challa, the name just rolls off the tongue.

“Miss (Y/N)! I thought you trying to dine and dash but …”

T’Challa was standing behind you for God knows how long, struggling to hold back his smile.

You straighten up, mortified. Could he possibly be any more handsome and you be anymore a dork?

“Oh, no. Um, what do you mean?” you stammer, folding your arms to look semi-normal.

He pulls out his phone. “We actually need each others numbers to call each other right?”

You still didn’t exchange numbers! Thinking of how much of a mess you are you say, “Yeah, sorry! Of course, allow me.”

You take his phone and type it in with your name saving it.

Handing it back, T’Challa takes it and puts it in his pocket, eyes never leaving your face as he gives you a closed mouth smile.

“You have a good rest of your day, (Y/N). I look forward to connecting with you soon.”

He turns and strides down the sidewalk away. As much as you hated to see him go, you loved watching him leave. Was the dip in his gait put on or natural? Either way, you loved it.

Later that day you go home, light as a feather. You lowkey hate how some male attention could give you such an array of hormonal bliss that you felt like a traitor to the sisterhood.

Your roommate hadn’t gotten home yet so, you take the time to cook yourself some food, even though your hunger was honestly minimal. Whenever you got really excited in any emotional direction, your appetite just goes south. But you earned a meal today, so why not celebrate with dinner. You look up a bookmarked recipe on your phone for some baked chicken with steamed vegetables and curl up to some Grown-ish as you work. The episode with Yara Shahidi’s character obsessing over the relationship status of her and Cash was queued up. Seeing her send literally 30 text messages to Cash saying an unintelligible number of things made you cringe hella heavy. Why would she get caught up with a college athlete anyway? You knew where this episode was going, as you turn back to seasoning your food.

While binge watching, you only eat about half of your food, which is better than nothing. You have more energy than you know what to do with though, so with the extra living room space, you decide to knock out a little yoga to center yourself. Laying out your mat and queueing up YouTube you switch to a yoga channel for beginners and put a chill playlist on shuffle. You close your eyes as the instructor tells you to be present in today’s practice, breathing deeply and exhaling equally. The practice started off simple enough with some cat-cows and downward dogs, but the intensity picked up soon once some planks and chair poses were thrown in. You perspired like a Pinocchio meeting a woodpecker but pushed through each pose with a little motivation in your head. If T’Challa could see me now. Each challenge you faced, you thought of him being under you while you planked, over you while you did a bridge. Once the poses were over you’d curse yourself for being so silly but hey, it worked.

During the cool down, the instructor tells you to get into happy baby pose, which you welcome with a deep sigh, wiping your brow. You didn’t expect such an intense workout, so luckily you didn’t go ham on your food.

You hear the lock turn on the door, and in walks in Tavia.

“Well damn, bitch, am I interrupting something?!”

You look between your legs at Tavia, “Nah girl, I’m almost done.”

“You sure? Cuz looks like you just getting started to me. Why are you spreading your legs for anyone who walk in here?”

You roll out of your pose, grabbing your water. “Nothing, it’s been a minute since I got my mat out so…” you say taking a sip.

Tavia takes a seat in a easy chair across from you, taking off her shoes. “Mmhm, so what else is it bitch, cuz the fact that you ain’t posted up here smashing some cookies, watching Chocolate City or some other trash got me almost concerned.” She says, faking her best concerned face.

You roll your eyes, “It’s nothin! Really, but I mean, I may have ran into someone today, but that’s not why I’m over here ‘pussy poppin’’ like you say.”

“Uh-uh. How juicy is this? I was drinking tonight anyway but lemme know should I grab my bottle right now?”

You look at her sideways and give a slight nod.

Tava screams like the Holy Spirit just caught her as she runs with her hands raised over to the fridge. She gets out her moscato and runs back to her seat.

“Uh, I don’t get a glass?” You ask offended.

“No ma’am, you got talking to do. You can’t talk and drink at the same time.” Tavia says with a tongue pop.

“ANYWAY, so I’m going to the coffee shop on my break, right?” You say excitedly.

“Right, ‘break’.” Tavia says clutching the bottle while doing air quotes.

“Listen, plenty of them folks go and do whatever on company time. I need some caffeine to get through the mess.” You say defensively.

“Whatever, continue!”

“Ok, so I’m getting my shit, and just as I’m bout to leave, HIS order gets called.”

“Who??!”

“Thomas!”

Tavia’s body melts into the chair as she exclaims, “Whaaaaa??”

“YES! By the way, his name is T’Challa.”

“BITCH, you talked to him??”

With a little dance you confirm, “Hell yeah, fucking right!”

Tavia gets up to do a quick celebration twerk with you, passing the bottle. “Go head girl! Ok, so how did you go up to him? What did he say?”

Your face hurt from all the cheesing, “I just walked past him and he was like, ‘Hey, don’t I know you?’ and I said, ‘I hope so, cuz trying to know you.’ And eventually he remembered, so we got a table and talked about real surface level stuff, then I told him I gotta go back to work, so he was all ‘Well, I can’t have you walk out here without seeing you again. Put your number in.’ So I did, and that’s really about it.” You say content with your ‘story’.

Tavia was on the edge of her chair during your entire explanation until she said, “You gave him your number?”

You nod proudly, “Mhm!”

Tavia throws her hands in the air, “Girl! You ain’t gonna be nothing but a booty call then.”

Ou screw your face up at this admission. “Whatchu mean? He ain’t hood actin’, I just gave you the clipped version of how it went down. Why you think that?”

Tavia sighs, “You gotta get his number, so you have control. But since it’s the other way around, you gonna be waiting for him to call, and then when he does at 11pm, you gonna be showing off your wingspan and upset cuz he ain’t called you since.”

“Tavia, calm down. It ain’t even been a day. I’m not tryna wild like that, and he don’t seem the type.” You say with less spirit than before.

“And if that’s what you wanted, you know I’m down for you; hit a split on the dick shawty act up! But I know you for real want some committed peen, so I’m just giving you worst case before it slaps you in the face, ok?” Your good vibes from earlier are coming down faster than guillotine so you decide to dismiss yourself.

“Don’t be upset girl. You still did your thing, and milk him for all it’s worth either way. Hate the game, not the player!”

You roll your mat up and go back to your room. Your eyes go straight for your phone. You think back to the articles you read on dating. People usually wait 3 days to call right? Or is that just after the first date? What’re the rules for the phone exchange? He could’ve texted you right there to have his number, but he didn’t so, could Tavia be right? And if she was, is it so bad? Dick is dick, and it sure hasn’t been present in your life.

You go to pick up your phone, opening up to the main menu.

Missed Call (1) Voicemail (1)

Your heart thumps in your chest as you check the number. It’s just digits, not one of your known numbers. You walk across your floor couple times before listening to the message, calming yourself down and for the first time hoping it was just a bill collector. You select the number and dial before closing your eyes to center yourself like the yoga instructor told you. A few rings pass before you realize what you may have done.

“Hello?”

Your pulse literally stops as your eyes fly open at the voice on the other line. You accidentally hit call back instead of call voicemail.

“Miss (Y/N) Is that you?” T’Challa says.

“Yeah, hey, how are you doing?” You say in as steady voice you can muster as you pull at your hair in frustration.

“I missed you earlier. Uh, your call, I mean. Well, I called you. Did you get my message?”

So that was him on that voicemail. You didn’t want to lie but you didn’t want to look weird calling without context either.

“Uh, yeah. I did. Thanks for calling by the way.”

He could’ve called to say he didn’t want to see you again.

“Please, I should be thanking you for offering your time. So do you know when you would like to do it?”

Heat crawls from neck to your cheeks, out of your pits, from your nani, all at once. Do what?! Is he inviting you somewhere or asking a favor?

“Uh, how does Saturday sound?” You freeze at the anticipation of his answer.

“That’s great! I have no problem with that. We will try for 5pm?”

You nod like he can see you before responding, “Yeah, that’s good to me. I can’t wait.”

You could practically hear T’Challa smiling as he said, “Wonderful. Forgive me for the time of the hour, I hope I didn’t wake you.”

You sit on the bed to keep from falling under your buckling knees. “Not at all, I was just turning in so I didn’t want to leave you hanging.”

“You’re too kind. I will see you then, if not at the shop first! Good Night (Y/N).”

“Good night T’Challa.” You press the red symbol and take the deepest breath you’ve done all day. How erotic did that sound ‘goodnight, T’Challa’? Geez just call him back to come over and get it over with already, you thought.

You turn off the light and lay in your bed electrified with that same energy from before. You almost forgot, but you pick up the phone and push for voicemail this time and listen:

Hi, I hope this is the right number. (Y/N), I’m just calling to see if you would come with me to the music festival this weekend. I don’t know if you heard about it or if it is your thing, but it sounds like a nice time. We could just walk around, enjoy the sounds. Uhh, just let me know when you get the chance, or I may see you at our favorite place. (laughs then clears his throat) Umm, but yeah, sorry for the long message. This is T’Challa by the way. Hope to hear from you soon.

Your phone prompts you to save or delete the message and you carefully save it before you listen a couple more times. Putting your phone away you turn on your side, squeezing your legs together to bring yourself back down again. You remind yourself that this is still just nothing more than two people meeting up at a public place with a bunch of other people. No one has claimed nobody yet. But like Tavia said, gotta milk it for what it’s worth, and how you feel right now is pretty damn priceless.

Part 3

Other Works

King Kil’mawalls

T’akia

N’Jadaka’s Helpful Hands

Some Weeks Are Better Than Others

The Coffee Prince

Commencement Day

My Ragtag

@sweetpeachjones@scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade@hairhattedghooligan@universalbri @therevolution-willbelive @you-like-this-chain @sarcastic-sunshines @airis-paris14

groovybbyy and nyeebey, yall here too! I just can’t tag you for some reason <3</p>

#t'challa #t'challa fanfic #t'challa x reader #t'challa x you #coffeeshop au #black panther au #black panther fanfic #marvel fanfic #black panther #marvel #fanfic

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theabominableblogger · 6 years

Text

My Reaction to “Gotham” S4E2

Just a heads up, there are mentions of suicide in this episode, and this episode gets disturbing because of the hallucinations caused by Scarecrow’s fear toxins. If this reaction post is uncomfortable for you guys in any way, don’t read.

If you need to talk to anyone, you can call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255 (available 24 hrs a day everyday) or you can reach out to friends and family or anyone you know on Tumblr. We care.

AN: I managed to record my reactions to this episode and hopefully I can transcribe what I said into this post.

Whoa...

Yeah that’s the old house, where Gerald’s wife died!

Whoa...

Oh my gosh, is that the dead guy [as the new Scarecrow hanging out in the yard]?

Ohh, that’s the Scarecrow hat that he [Jonathan] puts on in the season finale!

*Jim finds the victim from the end of the last episode still screaming* Oh my gosh, the guy actually had some of the dried up fear toxin around his mouth. Oh crap.

What the- frick, Bruce?

*Jim walks in to see Bruce in one of the holding cells* Oooohhhh...

*gasps when Scarecrow appears in the Arkham warden’s office*

HE’S GOT A SCYTHE...

The way he [Scarecrow] kind of twitches his head to the side reminds me of Davy Jones from “Dead Man’s Chest”

*gasps when Scarecrow gives the Warden a face full of fear gas*

OK, here’s my question: does the fear toxin come as a liquid first then dry? Because when we see a close up afterwards, it looks like he was just sprayed in the face with water. You can see moisture!

*gasps* Lucius!

“What were you [Bruce] doing before that?” “Rock climbing.” HaaaaHAHAHA

Is that gonna be the new code name for his outgoings as Batman? “Rock climbing?”

What the heeeeck?

*yells in horror when the Warden starts seeing a monster clown through the fear toxin*

*gasps when the Warden mistakes the other inmates as other clowns and shoots them down*

Oh my God...

Ooooohhh my gosh...

*gasps when Scarecrow gives one of the Arkham inmates a face full of fear toxin*

Oh my gosh, that drumroll in the background. Is that Scarecrow’s theme?

“James Gordon?” *in same tone of voice* Oswald Cobblepot!

“[Jim] Play nice.” “No.” When does Jim ever play nice?

“Instead, let me [Oswald] me make you [Jim] a deal.” Oh no.

“Find this Jonathan Crane and lock him up within 24 hours or admit to me, your subordinates, and the people of Gotham that you failed, and allow me to clean this city up!” Jim, c’mon, don’t.

*groans in frustration*

Who the crap is this?

*Barbara enters the room* Oooohhhhh.... my God.

Uhhh...

Explanations please? I know it has to do something with Ra’s al Ghul but... what?

*Barbara reveals her new hideout to be a weapons store* What the...

Oh my God, there’s just machine guns everywhere...

Oh my God, Barbara needs to get rid of that haircut like now!

Oh my God, he’s [Bruce] going back out again.

“Out there, Alfred, I [Bruce] feel more alive than I've ever felt before.“ Oh my God.

Alfred, go out there and freaking stop your boy.

*None of the GCPD officers offer to help Jim take down Scarecrow* Oh my freaking God

*Harvey refuses to go* Oh my God, Harvey, go. No, my God, Harvey.... go with him...

“So I am sorry, partner, but you are on your own on this one.“ Oh my freaking God

Jim’s gonna after Scarecrow and a hundred fear dosed inmates by himself. Great plan.

Literally no one so far has made any good decisions

WHAT THE-

You see that dude just walking backwards like Reagan from “The Exorcist?!?!?”

AN: And no, I’m not putting a link to the Spider-Walk scene (original and/or extended or deleted version) in because c’mon.

WHA-

Oh my God, it’s the Warden!

“It’s you. You [Jim] came!” *whispers* Crap!

Wait, did Jonathan take the precaution of just applying like tons of eye black around his eyes [for the mask]?

*cracks up when Victor heart-eyes a gun in a display case*

“Yeah, I’d say it’s open. Hot damn, it’s like Christmas.” Heeheeheeheehee!

Why is Ivy still working for Penguin?

“[Barbara] You lost your money on The Sirens Club, then went missing. Rumor was you were dead. And now you're back with a brand-new fancy place. Who paid for it?“ Oh it has to be Ra’s!

“I’m [Victor] gonna take this [gun]....”

Oh, I like that mirror shot of Jim. Ooohhh...

Oh my God... is Jim gonna get freaking dosed with fear toxin? Holy crap, what is he gonna see?

*Jonathan takes off his Scarecrow mask* Oh my gosh, he did just smear a bunch of eyeshadow across his face... or ash. I’m gonna say ash.

*gasps when Jim gets a face full of fear toxin*

Oh my God! Holy crap, what’s he gonna see?

*covers mouth in shock*

“What will you see, I wonder? One of your victims, perhaps?“ Is he [Jim] gonna see freaking Lee? Oh God, I hope not.

He’s gonna see freaking Lee like dead or something.

Where the heck is Lee this season?

*groans in frustration and horror when Jim sees Lee bleeding out in a bathtub in the fear toxin*

*ends up dropping my head on the floor*

“We could have been a family, had a child. You destroy everything you touch.” Screw this...

Oh my gosh, this is dark. This is really freaking dark even for Gotham. Holy snot! What was the TV rating for this episode, for this specific scene alone? Oh my God!

Jim, it’s not real. It’s not real, it’s not real, it’s not real!

*starts slapping my laptop* Jim, it’s not real. It’s not real! It’s not real! No, no, no, no, no, please do not AAAAAHHHH!!!

“Cut deep.” *gasps*

No no nononono

*Jim beats the fear toxin* OHHH!!

He just powered through the fear toxin with sheer will alone. Bravo, Jim!

I wish there would be a thing as a tracker in this show. Please. Please have Lucius come up with such a device in S5 so that Bruce/Batman can use it. Por favor.

That would make this whole thing just so much easier.

What the heck?

*Some of the robbers remove Bruce’s mask* How do they not recognize that that’s Bruce Wayne?

“His face, it seems familiar. You famous or something?“ Yeah, how do they not recognize him?

*Bruce takes down the head robber* WHOA!

*gasps when Bruce makes an impromptu flamethrower and makes the robbers back off*

*Bruce uses a rope to jump out the window and land on the street* Whooo!

Oh, that was a smooth landing...

*gasps when Alfred comes to Bruce’s rescue*

“Now, I hate to tell you I told you so, Master Bruce.“ Hehehehehe

Bruce needs like a proper Bat-cowl.

*gasps when Ivy enters the room*

“Know what? [Tabitha] You’re rude.” Oooh. That’s a big insult.

*Jim sprays one of the infected inmates in the face with a fire extinguisher* Oh my gosh...

“Water!” Oh my God, are you freaking serious?

Wha- pull the fire alarm!

Wait, so water deactivates the fear toxin, what?

*gasps* Lucius!

Oh my God, did Lucius freaking make Bruce a Proto-Batsuit?

MVP of the episode, right freaking there.

*gasps in delight when we get our first look at the Proto-Batsuit*

“Oh, and long distance radio communicators. In case you two wish to talk to each other whilst climbing rock.“ Heeheeheehee

Yaassss!

“Selina said you [Tabitha] would need something from me [Barbara]. You can have anything you like.” “Fine. I’ll take your hand.” What?

Oh my God...

Is it gonna be like Jaime Lannister- she’s [Barbara] gonna get herself a gold hand? Or how is that gonna work?

Ohhhh, she [Tabitha] can’t do it...

Where the crap did Jonathan go?

“Which ones make me [Ivy] stronger?” “That's dangerous stuff! It's too powerful for you. It can get in your blood, your DNA.” She’s gonna drink freaking all of them, isn’t she?

*Ivy drinks all of the potions* She gonna age up again?

“We’d [Harvey and Jim] need an army to take on Penguin.” An army of what?

What about that list? Bruce has that list of all the people that have the licenses!

“Ooh, that's a lovely leap, Master Bruce; positively gazelle-like.“ *chuckles*

Whoa...

*We get our first full look of Bruce in his Proto-Batsuit* OK, it’s a start... definitely makes him look like a motorcycle gang member but it’s a start.

*jams out to the ending theme*

#the fear reaper #Gotham #FOX #gotham spoilers #the blogger reacts #looked at the stars and considered a reaction #jim gordon #scarecrow #jonathan crane #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #lucius fox #batman #ivy pepper #oswald copplepot #barbara kean #harvey bullock #lee tompkins #tabitha galavan

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writingtopasstime · 7 years

Text

Saint & Sinner (Chapter 2)

Chapter 1

Song Inspiration (This Chapter): The Black Keys - Lonely Boy

NEEDTOBREATHE - Something Beautiful

Trigger Warning: None??

Word Count: 1,560

Note: Sorry if this sucks and that it’s late. I didn’t say but I imagine this taking place a little bit before Season 1.

Y/n yawned. She didn't have the arms to cover her mouth. She was trying to balance her coffee as well as the stack of flyers she had printed out. The first step she always took to fix a business was word of mouth. She went out around the area and talked to the locals about checking out the place. This time she had an advantage. She had lived here before and knew quite a bit of the town and its people. She also couldn't help by wonder if she would run into Jax. Ever since the other night when they met she had been finding herself daydreaming about the biker. Her cheeks flared as she thought about her fantasies.

She rounded the corner saving the best place for last. The place she was most likely to run into a certain biker. The auto shop was great if you wanted your car fixed but it also is known for housing the Sons of Anarchy Motorcycle Club. Y/n tentatively made her way up to the auto office. The door was ajar revealing an older woman bent over a desk.

"Excuse me. I was wondering if I could have a minute of your time?" The woman looked up annoyed. "If it's not a good time I can come back." The woman took her glasses off and peered up at Y/n. Before she could reply motorcycles pulled into the lot. Y/n turned around her eyes scanning for blond hair. Jax swung his leg over his motorcycle his eyes locked with Y/n. A smirk spread across his face. Y/n made her way over to him a blush spreading up her cheeks. Her face was hot as all eyes followed her movements.

"Hey darlin'," he said. He glanced behind him as the rest of the bikers still lingered. With one look they dispersed. "What brings you to this neck of the woods?"

"Well, I was wondering if you would put this up in your shop. Maybe spread the word a bit." Jax took the flyer. His eyes scanned the paper before chuckling.

"What is it? Is there a typo or something?" Y/n asked nervously. Oh god. Her eyes widened at the thought. She just put out flyers all over town now if there was something wrong she would have to change them all out. All her work would have been for nothing.

"No, it's nothing like that. It's just the thought that you want a whole bunch of bikers into a cupcake place. It doesn’t seem like the best way to get business" Y/n blushed harder.

"You wanted to go. And anyways you don't have to go or put this flyer up I just thought that maybe you wanted to come. You seemed interested in it and maybe some of your-"

"Whoa slow down sweetheart. I'm just giving you a hard time." Jax looked down at the flyer again. “So you’re just here for my advertisement or did you want my service too.” Y/n tried to hide a smile behind her empty coffee cup.

“I’ve putting flyers up all around town today but if you want to-”

“Do you want to come in? Have a drink?” Jax asked motioning behind him. Y/n bit her lip. She had been warned about the things that went on in that club. Her parents also taught her not to judge a book by its cover so she slowly nodded her head. Jax led the way. The clubhouse wasn’t as bad as Y/n always thought it was. The smells were what to be expected of a dirty, gritty bar. Booze. Cigarettes. Sex. Y/n immediately felt out of place. The rest of the bikers from outside stared at her as she walked to the bar with Jax. A young guy with short blond hair stood behind the bar scrubbing who knows what from the countertop. An older gentleman with scars adorning both cheeks sat alone on the stool. His hands wrapped around a glass of caramel coloured liquid. “Sack beer. What do you want?” Jax asked turning to Y/n.

“Oh, I’m good right now. I have to go back to work soon.”

“You sure? Water? Coffee?”

“Whiskey,” the man at the bar asked in a thick accent.

“Um, coffee, please. Actually.” The bartender disappeared quickly. When he was gone Y/n turned to Jax. “Did you just call him Sack?” She asked confused.

“We call him Half-sack cuz he’s only got one ball,” the Scots man said. Y/n stifled a laugh.

“Oh,” she said quietly. Y/n was curious but she bit her tongue not wanting to get that personal. She cozied up to the bar leaving an empty stool between her and the drinking man. As if sensing her discomfort he turned to her and stretched out her hand.

“Chibs. Don’t worry I don’t bite.” Jax chuckled as he came around to sit next to her. Y/n smiled awkwardly.

“Y/n.” She took his hand relaxing when he held on gently. No matter how much she wanted to be normal around the group of men their mere presence intimidated her. The Scott then quietly excused himself joining to men at the pool table. Y/n turned her attention back to Jax who was intently watching her.

“You don’t have to worry about him or most of my guys. They are all pretty much harmless unless to push them.”

“It’s just a bit strange for me to be here.” Y/n replied her eyes finding a scratch on the counter. Her fingers followed suit tracing the indent.

“Why is that? Not used to the rough terrain?” Y/n laughed.

“My parents used to forbid me from coming here so I also that you guys were,” Y/n trailed off not sure how to finish.

“What that we had some sort of slaughterhouse in here?” Jax joked but Y/n wasn’t amused. To be honest that’s exactly what she imagined was the sort of thing that went on in a place such as this. “You know just because we have a reputation doesn’t mean all of it’s true. Hasn’t your parents ever taught you not to judge a book by its cover?”

“Yea. So I guess you’re gonna have to show me the truth.” Y/n finally looked up to find Jax dangerously close. Before he could close the distance the blond was back placing a mug in front of her. She blushed turning away from Jax. Jax leaned back in his seat without a word. Y/n was disappointed but slightly relieved too. She wasn’t sure getting involved with a biker was a great idea especially after her last breakup. The sounds of the other men in the filled the silence as Y/n sipped on her coffee her mood soured.

Time slipped by and before she knew it it had been almost two hours since she showed up. The tension had eased and she was introduced to the guys. Like Jax had said most of them seemed harmless but she held her walls firmly in place just in case. She had just lost a game terribly to the team of Jax when she looked down at her watch. “Shit. I need to get back. I’ve been gone way too long.”

“Come on sweetheart no need to make up excuses. Just admit your terrible and I’m the best.”

“No chance in hell pretty boy.” Y/n teased back.

“Ohh so you do like me.” Y/n rolled her eyes but her smile gave her away.

“I really do have to go.” She grabbed the extra fliers as well as her bag and headed towards the door.

“Hey wait,” Jax called freezing her in her tracks. Y/n turned around finding herself again dangerously close the blue-eyed biker. “Let me at least give you a ride back. It’s the least I can do for keeping you past curfew.” Y/n shook her head at his playful jab.

“Alright, asshole led the way,” Jax smirked. His arm went around her shoulders.

“You like me this way.” God, Y/n thought, he smells heavenly. She dared herself and slipped her arm around his waist bringing them closer. She wanted to stay like this but sadly they made it to his motorcycle. That’s when it clicked for Y/n. She was gonna have to get on his bike.

“Um. Jax,” she said nervously pulling away. “I’ve never ridden on one before.” Jax handed her his helmet that damn smile never leaving his face.

“Don’t worry I’ll keep you safe and if you get scared there are plenty of places that you can hold onto,” Jax replied cheekily. He fastened the helmet securely on her head before hopping on the bike. He turned holding out his arm. “Alright hop on.” Y/n hooked her foot onto the spoke and swung around until she was snug against his back. “Now just lean when I lean and you’ll be fine. And try not to move too much alright?”

“Okay,” Y/n held tightly onto Jax’s waist butterflies causing a storm in her stomach. As Jax started the bike up Y/n glanced back at the office to see the woman, arms crossed glaring at her. Y/n felt a dark dread spread throughout her body. Whatever the look was for and whoever the woman was Y/n knew it would only bring bad news. She made a mental note to steer clear of the woman.

#jax teller fanfiction #jax teller imagine #sons of anarchy imagine #sons of anarchy fanfiction #chapter 2 #songfic #saint and sinner

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borkasaurusrex · 7 years

Text

(D·N·C) SEASON 1 | EPISODE 1 | "PILOT"

(Heya! Ellie here!

This here block of text is a story form of one of my more popular series on Bitstrips, D·N·C! (formerly DNC and formerly formerly doesNOTcompute)

It’s a lil’ different than what I usually post but hey! I’m a fidgety girl that does fidgety things!

... I mean, it’s obvious at this point.

Anywho! Uhm... enjoy! :D)

That day started the same way as most great legends of yore do.

With a car crashing through a Dairy Queen and into a suburban mailbox, in ten seconds flat.

Let me explain.

The morning started normal enough. The light poured through the open bedroom window, coating the mostly wooden room in its yellow sheen. Curled up in a rosy bed, eyes squinting open from the bright morning light, was what looked like a boy. He blinked his eyes a couple of times, eyelids so heavy that after the third blink they, well, didn't open back up. Turning over on his side and pulling his sheets high up to his chin, the boy began to doze back off to slee -

BRRR!! BRRRR!! BRRRRR!!

With a gasp almost as loud as the alarm, the boy slumped heavy over the side of the bed and smacked into the carpet below, his blankets following right after - and on top - of him. The radio/alarm clock on the nearby nightstand glowed to life, the numbers '6:55' illuminating bright like red beacons from, well, a radio. And, from said radio, a muffle laugh exploded out, a gruff voice following:

"Good moooorning Calcheri Valley! While I was studying the blade, you were, well... just studying. Because it's that season yet again, gremlins of all ages. Ah yes, the dreaded education prison! Only at this jail, good behavior doesn't give you time off the clock. It gives you anxiety, fear, and a general feeling of loneliness and existential dread that will creep into your life and mind for the rest of your life. But hey: they have bosco sticks. That's sure something!"

The boy slowly pulled himself up, throwing the sheets back onto his bed in a crumpled mess. He walked across the room one heavy foot at a time, stopping at his closet door. He grabbed the handle and pulled it open slowly. A small bundle of shirts and other clothes poured out, covering his feet and most of the floor around. He groaned.

"So anyway, onto more important things - like me!" the radio continued, "I'm your host, Ben Dover, your local hunk of junk and spunk. Whazow!!"

The boy stuck one leg through a pair of plain blue jeans, leaning his weight against the wall his free hand. He slipped his other leg into the right hole, pulling it up to his waist... then stopped. He reached down towards his crotch. Smooth. Two pockets. And, on his tuckus?

A zipper. He groaned louder.

"Up next: McGruff, with Living Like You're Dying. You're listening to 133.7: Great tunes, great vibes, great thighs. What's not to love?"

The teen pulled on a dark jacket, rolling his shoulders. He zipped the jacket up... then back down. He tried zipping just an inch or two up, he tried halfway, he even pulled it all the way up to the collar. He finally zipped it open completely, letting it hang loose. He turned his body around towards the door, a long mirror taped to the white wood. Slipping his feet into a pair of extraordinarily plain black shoes, he faced the mirror, holding open his jacket... then closed it over his chest. He opened it back up... then closed it again. He held it open one last time, eyes narrowed... and let out a low, whisper of a sigh.

"Open, definitely."

Looking up and down himself in the mirror, the boy didn't think he looked half bad. A little plain, sure, but not terrible. His face was surprisingly average, the only defining feature being his greenish hazel eyes, and even those were about as bright as a rotting ficus. He brushed his shaggy brown hair out of his face to the side... and brushed it right back again. He thought about it for a second... and decided not to touch it. You don't mess with a classic. Red shirt, blue jeans, black jacket. He looked like an American dream. Or, well, a Midwestern staple anyway.

"Oh well..." he mumbled to himself. "Let's get this over with."

He reached a hand over to the doorknob, placing it on that nasty thing, and giving it a light yet tight twist.Then, with a low click, the door pulled -

From outside came a thundering crash, an incredible bang that so loud it shook the nearby curtains and picture frames like an earthquake. The boy spun around, eyes wide, running over to the nearest window and throwing the curtains open in a panic. Outside the dirty window was a wide, stretching view of what looked like your typical suburban cul-de-sac, everything in sight either a hue of brown or green. Maybe a little yellow, if you squint. Hard.

Directly outside the window, though, was a front yard. The grass was perfectly trimmed, bright, bordered cleanly by brown mulch and rocks. It was flawless - besides the dark red convertible smashed and smoking through the front gate, anyway. Under its front tires was the broken remains of a wooden mailbox, bits of wood from it and the fence scattered as far as the front door. Inside the car was only smoke - if there was a driver, they were long gone by now.

The boy could hear the faint sound of police sirens. He sighed.

"Looks like it's gonna be one of those days..."

Standing in the green front yard was a man. Very tall, slim, long hair that clearly hasn't been combed in forever yet squeezed tightly into a ponytail. He squinted his eyes at the wreckage next to his slippered feet, stroking his scruff in thought with one hand, pink doughnut clenched in the other.

"I wonder..." he mumbled, taking a small bite of his pastry.

"It's a car, dad."

A boy stepped out from behind, the same boy from before, backpack slumped over his right shoulder. The man chuckled. "That... that it is."

"What happened, do you know?" the boy asked.

"The police. They just, uh, left. They gave me this doughnut too, pretty sweet, huh?" The boy's dad took another bite, then continued, "They said that some guy stole a car - parolee, I'm pretty sure. He panicked when he saw the fuzz on his tail, tried to take a right turn, and ended up plowing straight through a Dairy Queen, kitchens and all. It was the one on Elm, y'know?"

The boy nodded. "I know the one."

"So, uh, he smashed right through that palace and, well, he drove down Fig, through the Myers' place, and ended up nicely over our mailbox, over here. The police showed up, gave me this 'nut - that's 'nut', by the way, short for doughnut - you came out here, and... well, then we come full circle. Or half. Maybe three quarters if we're lucky. Shit, I'm bad at math."

"I see where I get if from," the boy said, smirking. "So, uh... what happened to the guy? The parolee?"

"They took the mail and ran, the classic bamboozle. But hey, on the bright side: no bills!"

"... That's not how it works."

"Eh, killjoy," his father sneered. "Speaking of joy killing, should you be, like, at school right about now? It is your first day, the last thing you want is to be that kid, right Axel?"

The kid, Axel, shook his head. His father chuckled.

"That's what I thought," he mumbled. "So, uh... you want to take the bus, or...?"

"They don't come to our neighborhood."

"Ohh, right. The whole 'out of school jurisdiction' shenanigans and all that. Oh well... you want to hitch a ride today, then?" His pops turned around, jerking his thumb towards a beaten black SUV with one of those gaudy pink mustaches decals on the front. "I've got an appointment, but... eh, I can drop you off. Quickly, though. Urgent business, you know."

Axel raised an eyebrow. "What kind of business?"

"I'm meeting with billionaires. Royalty, if you can believe it."

"... Are you talking about Dairy Queen?"

"Not today. The queen's a little... well... she's a wreck, that's all I'm going to say," his father explained. "The King, though? Oh, I could go for some beef."

"Oh my God, dad," Axel groaned. "Can we just go, please?"

"Oh, okay. Fine. Just lemme bust this 'nut and we'll be - "

Axel's mouth hung open, eyebrows turned upward. "That is not what that means, dad."

"Sure it is. What ELSE would it mean?"

RRRRRING!

The pale halls of Calcheri High School became loud with the slamming of doors, the stampede of teenage feet. Hundreds upon hundreds of teens of all (well, most) ages flooded the halls, going this way or that. The thunder of dark red lockers pounding open, the giggles and laughter from the smallest girl to the largest bloke.

The school year was now in session.

From out of the multicolored, bulging crowd was Axel. Taped black binder in hand, he waded in and out of the incoming kids, making his way down the barely-lit main hall. He was walking steadily until he stopped suddenly, a large, very tall object blocking his path. He frowned, looking up.

In front of him was a ladder. Orange. Long, as most are. On top of the towering steps was a man. He was older but not old. Fatter but not fat. A sort of an in between guy, really. He brushed his long curled hair out of his face, grumbling to himself while picking the ceiling with what looked like a screwdriver.

"Uh... hey, Mr. Davidson!" Axel cried, looking upward. "What's up?"

"Exactly!" Mr. Davidson turned his head towards the boy, face moist and red with sweat. "I... I've been trying to get this - whatever it is - off the dang vent but it's not working! I... what is it, anyway? Putty? Slime?"

Axel's head craned, squinting his eyes. "Gak, I think."

"He does this, he always does this!" Mr. Davidson exclaimed. "Even in Valley Middle, he... gah, it won't budge!"

"Uh... who always does - "

"Your friend! The... short one."

"Weston?" Axel asked. "Well... uh, yeah, I can believe it."

"Every year, every damn year..." Davidson grumbled, giving the vent a long, screeching scrape. "It's always the same thing, always. He puts up a trap, something I have to clean up, like graffiti or a bunch of trash, and then, when my back's turned... BOOM! That's when he... y'know, does it."

Axel scrunched his brows. "Does what?"

"Does... the thing! One year it was a pie to the face, the other it was a firecracker in my pants. It's always pain, always. I swear, if his father wasn't such an important donor to the school, I would - "

"Uh... hey, Mr. Davidson?"

The teacher leaned over the top step. "What is it, ElRite?"

"You say Weston sets a trap... then 'gets' you when you're least expecting it, right?"

"Yeah, precisely. What's your point?"

"Well, you're on a ladder... inspecting a mess... and, uhm... there's a rope. Right there."

Davidson looked down, and, sure enough, a thick brown rope was tied to the leg of the ladder. He looked back up, eyes wide. "Huh. So there is."

As if on cue the rope was tugged hard, pulling the ladder leg up and the rest of it straight down. A cry barely escaped Davidson's lips as it slammed into the floor, shattering the plastic and sending the man flying across the tiled ground. He slammed right into an open locker, and, before he could pull himself up the door was thrown shut, slamming the metal hard with an audible click! from the lock. Next to the locker and howling so hard with laughter that it sounded like dying wheezing, was a boy. He was pretty short, only coming up to Axel's chest, and he wasn't the tallest teen around either. The fellow was black, his basketball shorts black, his beanie black, and his shirt... was blue, actually. But dark blue, though, so that kinda half counts.

The guy let out a loud chuckle, literally slapping his knee after. He turned to Axel, and gave him a wicked grin. "What's wrong, Ax? You seem a lil'... locked up! Ahahaha!!"

"Can you let him out now?" Axel asked. "He's got classes, Weston."

The boy, Weston, rubbed his chin like a philosopher of yore, clearly thinking. He then smiled. "Aaaaaah... nope!"

A teacher, judging by their clothes and nametag, turned around the hall, beelining straight for Weston. The small guy squeaked out a "Shit!", turning heal and sprinting away at high speeds, shouting "See you later, fuckers!"

Axel winced as his friend slammed face first into a column, slumping onto the ground like a bag of wet potatoes. The red-clad teen couldn't help but sigh.

RRRRRING!

The classroom boomed with the scrapping out of metal chairs, desks pushed away and dozens of feet making their way out as fast as they would take them. Mr. Davidson stood in front of a chalkboard, loudly trying to catch the fleeing students attention, "Hey, don't forget about the worksheet on page 32, it's... due tomorrow..." but it ultimately fell on absent ears.

Well, absent expect for two. Rummaging through her bag, and swearing under breath, was a girl. She was as pale as the papers on her desk, long red hair constantly falling in her face, to her obvious frustration. She narrowed her eyes, drawing a breath as she finally managed to -

A hand grabbed her shoulder, jerking the redhead up with a gasp. An angry one. She whirled around, teeth clenched... but paused.

"Fuckin' hell, Axel, you could've given me a heart attack!" she cried, voice laced with an accent somewhere between Daniel Howlter and Lena Oxton. So... pretty dang British.

Axel's frowned, mumbling, "Oh. Sorry."

"Look, mate, it's okay, just... don't do it again, alright?" the girl asked.

Axel nodded. She blew air hard through her nose.

"Okay, good," she said. "I... uh... was there something you wanted to talk about, or...?"

"Uh, yeah. Well... kinda," Axel replied. "Weston got this GameStop gift card, for his birthday I think... and he, well, wanted some company while he was browsing and stuff, you know? You wouldn't mind... right?"

"Sorry, mate," she grunted, pulling her backpack on her lap. "I'm busy."

Axel grinned, brow raised."Busy? With what? Detention?"

The redhead didn't answer. Axel's playful smile slowly turned into a frown.

"... Wait, I was... uh... just joking. You didn't... right?"

She pushed up her glasses, then zipped up her bag. Not a word.

"Evanna." Axel put a hand on her shoulder, trying to look reassuring but the closest he could get was a wonky grimace. "You can tell me. I'm... not going to judge you, or anything.

"I know you wont," she said, "It's just... I wasn't thinking and they had it coming, and -"

"Who? Hazen? Cameron? Jobe?"

She sighed, pushing her glasses back up again. "All the above."

"And plus I had to pick something up after school, but guess what now?" she continued. "Guess that's fifty dollars down the sodding drain, huh?"

Axel paused. He thought for a couple seconds before muttering, "... I can pick it up for you."

Evanna turned around, brows raised. "What?"

"I said... I can pick up whatever it is you, well, bought," Axel said, "I can do that much."

"No, I wouldn't have - "

"Evanna, please. Just let me help."

Evanna's eyes widened, a grin forming on her lips. "You... you would really do that? For me?"

He nodded, smiling wide. She smiled right back.

"So, where'd I got to go? Walmart? Target?"

"Ah... no. The Black Shack."

He looked down, smirk quickly shifting to a frown. "... You... you mean the Black Shack? The - "

"Yes, the pawn shop. Y'know, the one on the edge of town? That isn't too much to ask, is it?"

He brought back his composure, bringing a smile back. "Uh... no, of course not! I'll get it done! I swear!"

RRRRRING!

Evanna shot up, slumping her bag over her shoulder. She grinned, putting a hand on Axel's shoulder.

"Best get a move on," she said, walking away, "Don't want to be late, mate."

She slammed the door shut on her way out, leaving Axel completely alone in the empty classroom.

He closed his eyes, rubbing his temples idly. "The edge of town... the Black Shack... tonight... alone. Welp... what's the worst that can happen?"

Axel pushed the rusted doubled doors open, the thick smell of musk and cigarette smoke overwhelming his senses immediately. He stepped into the building, replacing the warm wind of the outside with the cool overworked AC of the shop inside. The place was large yet small, everything some various shade of brown except for a couple of neon signs on display, the carpet, and not much else. The walls were packed to the absolute brim with multicolored, mismatched junk, from big pencils to full on severed animal heads displayed above the cashier's counter like some sort of grim decoration. Below the heads there was a wooden sign, reading 'The Black Shack'.

The door slammed behind Axel, sucking out the last of the Autumn air and making such a huge slam! the teen almost jumped. Almost. It was more of a flinch than anything. He slowly walked across the main area of the pawn shop, eyes dancing over the shop's many... unique wares. He stopped at the counter, where a tall, almost stupidly buff man stood there with a salmon shirt so tight it looked like it was painted on. He had a nametag, 'MUSTAFA' sloppily written on with Sharpie.

The man's mouth stretched across his face, in a... smile? Frown? Both? It was hard to say. Anyway, the man, Mustafa, looked down at Axel, and, well, did that again, saying, "Ah... well, suck my ass and call me Dyson. I thought it was you. I could smell the teenage mediocrity the second you opened the door."

"Uh... is that a good thing?" Axel asked.

"Maybe, maybe, who knows..." the cashier shrugged slowly, cracking a toothy grin. "But, bah. Whatever. Why can I do for ya, boy? Is it... did you come for the circumcisions?"

To say Axel was confused would be an understatement. "... Circumcision?"

"Yeah. Y'know, circumcisions. It's when you take a small boy, keep them from wormin' and squirmin', and take a fresh knife and just real easy take a small snip from their pe - "

"Jesus, I know what it is! Christ, it's just... don't you need, like, a doctorate to that or something? Or you could go to... like, jail."

Mustafa chuckled deep. "Not if you don't get caught."

He laughed again at seeing the boy's expression, adding, "I'm kidding, I'm kidding. We only supply the most legal circumicisions in these parts, my word. So, uh... yeah. Did you have a question, or...?"

"I'm here to pick up."

"Okay. Cool, cool..." Mustafa took out a small paper taped to the register, squinting. "What's the name?"

"Seelig. Evanna Seelig."

The big man raised his eyebrows, leaning over. "School must be torture, huh?"

"It's not my name," Axel explained, "I'm... picking up for a friend."

"Okay, give me a sec..." the cashier ducked under the counter, coming back up with a large cardboard box he was ruffling in with his spare hand. He pulled out a CD, black, with a group of boys on the cover with enough tattoos to give a Republican a heart attack. "Here it is! ''Till Death Do Us Mario Kart', Cataclitsm's newest album. Free razor blade in every package!"

His smile became strained. "I'm serious."

Axel took the CD from him slowly, saying, "Uh. Thanks."

"No problemo. Have a nice day!" Mustafa waved at the teenager while he walked away from the counter. Axel slipped the CD into his jacket pocket, grabbing the front door with his free hand and pulled it -

The door slammed open hard, almost knocking Axel straight over. Before the boy knew what was happening the man behind the door grabbed him by his jacket collar, pulling him close and - to Axel's horror, drew what looked like a gun and pointed it at his chin. The couple of customers in the shop were terrified, screaming. One customer tried to make a dash to the backdoor, only for a second man to jump out of nowhere, tackling the woman to the ground and slamming his fist into her jaw, her head falling limp onto the carpet below.

"Everyone, hands where I can see 'em!" the man behind Axel yelled, taking a rugged ski mask out of his pocket and tugging it over his balding dome. "This is a robbery!"

Axel knew he couldn't break free. He knew he couldn't scream, couldn't run away. He couldn't do anything, anything at all... except groan.

The autumn air of Calcheri Valley became flooded with long, shrieking scream of sirens. The source of the cries came from three police cars, SUVs, pulling up into the now barricaded-off parking lot of the only pawn shop in miles - The Black Shack. Dozens of citizens, ranging from worried soccer moms to pumped up edgelords, were plastered to the barricade, trying to scoot closer or to crane their head for a better look, but the surrounding police shoved back anyone who tried.

With a loud slam! the door to the biggest police car threw open, a single black cowboy boot stepped out onto the pavement below. A second boot followed, then a gloved hand, slamming the door shut behind its owner. He was a big man, not really length wise but definitely width. He was dressed in a traditional police uniform, a black cowboy hat tipped over his brow. He took the cigar out of his mouth, lips tracing the area it was, and let it drop onto the floor.

He took a couple of wide steps forward, coming up to a pair of younger looking cops a couple of feet away from the front door. The closer one's eyes widened as the man walked close, stuttering out, "Oh! Chief! We, uh, didn't expect you to make it out here today, sir - "

"What's the situation?" the chief asked, tone laced with a Midwestern drawl.

"Two men have the building on lockdown. At lease one is visibly armed," the police officer replied. "The other... we're not sure. But we're not going to take any chances, sir."

The chief grinned, taking out another cigar. "Good. S.W.A.T. inbound in five minutes so let's just try to stall in the meantime so nobody gets - "

"That's it? That's all you're going to bloody do?"

The three police men turned their heads and looked down, at the five-foot-something redhead girl standing directly behind them, arms crossed and all.

One of the younger cops looked around, eyebrows scrunched in confusion. "How... how did she - ?"

"Evanna Seelig." The chief turned around, smile wide yet strained. "I would ask what you're doing out here all by yourself, but I'm frankly scared of the answer. Maybe you - ah, your father's here, isn't he? Please, remind that man that until he gets a valid licence in this country he is not allowed to interfere in our busi - "

"He's not here," Evanna interrupted. "I'm alone."

"Ah. Then, maybe you just wanted to look at the crime scene? Because, if so, you can do so behind the safety of the barricades over there, where everyone else is - "

"My friends in there, probably scared out of his bloody mind and you're not even doing anything?" Evanna asked, tone harsh. "You're just all standing around with your head up your arses instead of actually doing something about - "

"We can't just run on in there willy-nilly. If we did, your friend will be die," the chief growled. "Look, we've got this under control. Just run off and let us handle this, okay?"

With a puff, Evanna turned around, slowly walking away from the shop.

"Under control my arse..." she muttered under her breath.

"Run along, now," one of the police officers added, taking a sip of his Big Gulp. "This is no place for little girls."

Evanna felt her face redden, her fists clench. She had over a dozen comebacks she could snap back, half of which would get her arrested, but... she held her tongue. She jammed her hands into her pockets, making her way back to the barricade with everyone else.

"Good luck, Axel..." she whispered, "You're going to need it..."

"All right, let me have a look at ya's..."

The tension in the Black Shack could be cut with a Frank 'N Furter-esque meat cutter. The dozen or so people in there were on their knees, bound by rope to one of multiple vintage barbershop poles in the pawn shop. The folk in there were mostly older, expressions ranging from terrified to slightly inconvenienced. The man standing above them all wearing a ski mask, however, was... less stressed about the whole situation.

"Hmm... not too bad, not too bad..." the man paced back and forth, wet boots squishing on the open carpet. He turned his head to the right, eyes narrowed at his guests. "Here's the deal, duckies. My friend and I's the boss of this joint now, so if any of ya's so much as think ya want to play hero or some shit like that, well... don't. Or it's the gutter for ya!" He pulled out his gun, a small pistol, and whipped out around towards an older man who at this point was bawling his eyes out. The burglar chuckled, stuffing the firearm back in his pocket. "Good... good."

"Now, uh... where the fuck is - oy, there ya are!" The man craned his head towards the nearby back door, which was wide open, with the second robber from before stepping in.

"Sorry, dude," the second man mumbled, brushing his hands on his jeans. "Had to take a piss."

"There's a bathroom right over there, dumbass." The first man jerked his gun behind him, towards an ajar door in the corner.

"I know, but... the smell in there is horrid," the second man explained, "I'm a man with standards, you know."

"You could've gotten caught, ya twink! Lookie outside, there's cops up the whazoo out there! If ya blew this operation right outta the gate, I'd..."

"Raise your voice? Swear? Use unnecessary slang terms to put your point across?"

The first guy paused, thinking it over. Begrudgingly, he muttered, "... All of the above..."

"But, uh, 'ey, that's not important!" he continued, turning back to the crowd of onlookers. "We're here to steal some shit and get out unscathed! An', I don't know 'bout you, but my finger's are feelin' awful sticky right now!"

"Try adding a lil' Vaseline to your showers," his friend said. "Trust me: it works wonders."

"I... it was an expression!" the burglar cried, teeth bared through his mask. "Dumbass!"

"Bah, whatever! Grab the bag and let's get to work! Whoo!"

He threw a bag to his friend, the second catching it effortlessly and scooping an entire counter's full of trinkets into it in moments. The two searched around and under everything, shoving everything from the smallest junk to the most expensive treasure into the sack, all while laughing like criminals in a bad police drama.

Axel watched it all in silence, the man tied tied onto his pole with him passed out. Craning his head to the right, Axel saw it: the back door, still slightly open from when the second robber came in. He furrowed his eyebrows, grinding his teeth, and turned his head around, where the CD he came to the Black Shack for was laying directly behind his tied fists.

I've got an idea, he thought, droplets of sweat forming on his brow. It's stupid, but hey. It's an idea...

A loud skid echoed through the parking lot as a large, dark blue van pulled up into lot, 'S.W.A.T.' stenciled on the side in big blocky letters. The chief of police sat up, a wide grin forming under his bushy beard as the back of the truck burst open, and half a dozen heavily armored men came swarming onto the scene.

"Finally! Feels like I've been waiting for years..." the police chief grumbled, turning to two police officers to his side, munching doughnuts. "Well, what are you waiting for? Get in position!"

"Yes, sir!" they cried, rushing off out of view.

"Good... good." He drew a walkie talkie off the front of his jacket, turning the frequency and putting the device up to his mouth. "Attention officers! S.W.A.T.'s inbound so back down for now, except... hmm... Jefferson and Stine, report to the front. Who knows, maybe they'll need assist -

"I somehow doubt the sodding S.W.A.T. team need two overpaid, over-glorified janitors to help them, but eh. You learn something new everyday."

"Goddammit Seelig! What the hell did I tell you about coming out here alone? The freakin' ner - "

"I'm not alone," Evanna said, stepping the side. "I brought a friend."

Behind her was Weston, who flashed the chief with a quick flurry of fingers guns and an "Eyyyy!"

"Jesus, it gets worse..." the chief grumbled, holding his temple. "Look. Since I'm a kind, benevolent ma - "

"Debatable."

"- man, I'll give you five seconds to get out of here before I have Jefferson and Stine escort you out personally. Do you understand?"

"Why's that vent open?" Weston asked, pointing ahead

"I... what?" the chief turned around, and, sure enough, on the side of the pawn shop an air vent was wide open, its cover lying alone in the dirt.

The bearded man turned back around, grumbling, "Well, uh, that's where the second robber entered the building when the burglary first happened, obviously. It... it doesn't matter! You're trying to stall, and I won't have - "

"If that's so, then why is no one investigating that area?" Evanna asked. "Couldn't you just go through the vent and sneak into the building that way, without making all this 'armor and guns' display?"

"Well, we can't! The vent is too small! All of our men surely couldn't fit. But... bah! I've had enough of this!" the chief slowly strolled away, towards the S.W.A.T. van in the back. "I'll be back in five minutes and if you two aren't vacant from the reminisce, I'll escort you out myself!"

The police captain disappearing out of view, Weston turned to his redhaired friend, smiling wide. "Hey Eve."

"Hmm?"

He chuckled, nodding his head towards the open vent. "I think I've got a plan... and whoo boy. Is it a doozy..."

"Oh shit, S.W.A.T.!"

"There 'ere? Fuck!"

The two criminals peered through stilted blinds, the second one leaning away with his face twisted in terror. "You... you said we wouldn't get to this point! Y-You said we would be outta here before the cops even knew what's-what! You said - "

"I know what I said," his partner growled, turning his head away and back to the shop. "We've gotta bail, now."

"But what about...?" the second burglar waved his hand around, to the bound onlookers tied to the poles.

The first reached into his pocket, drawing out his gun. He cocked it, smiling. "Easy. We waste 'em all."

Seemingly everyone on the ground screamed and yelled, pleaded for their lives with red panting faces. Their eyes reflected pure horror - similar to the look, actually, of the second burgler.

"We can't kill them! What the hell are you talking about?!" he cried.

"We're already goin' to jail, Hank, there's no escape from this one!" the first yelled back. "Even if we get outta here right now, them... they're witnesses. Just cleanin' up loose ends, see?"

"'Loose ends'? What the crap are you talkin' about? Just listen to yourself, dude - !"

All while the two were arguing and bickering Axel watched, carefully, scanning every movement. The first took a step forward, the second fumbling back in reaction. They did this, again and again, until the second robber was within kicking distance of the teen. Axel peered behind him, nonchalantly, like stretching his neck. His hands fumbled, the teen using the little vision he had to find the CD and grab it. He popped the case open gently, reaching in while avoiding making any sound with the hard plastic. His fingers felt around, towards something different, until... metal. Cold steel. He picked it up, feeling the small object. It was smooth, the top and bottom edges serrated and awfully sharp.

Perfect.

Axel waited for the perfect moment. The first robber yelled "Shit!", causing the second to jump and take just one more step back. Axel positioned himself and, now equipped, he went to work.

He stroked the razor blade across the rope, slowly. Nothing at first.

He ran it across again. Still nothing.

That third glide did it. He felt the bind grow looser and looser until he could feel the pressure off of his aching wrists, his circulation coming back to flow. The older man tied up next to Axel, however, didn't feel anything. He fainted a long time ago.

Axel waited, keeping his body as still as possible. The first burglar walked across the room, pointing his gun at a woman to her obvious horror. The second arched his shoulders, yelling at his partner. His eyes, focus, and full attention was there.

Alright Axel, he thought, bracing his body tight, It's now - or never.

Axel exploded up off the floor, so fast that the second robber barely had time to react to the knee now dug deep in his crotch. He howled, toppling over on top of one of the prisoners below. Now on his feet with adrenaline rushing through his veins, Axel connected eyes with the back exit - and started sprinting.

He ran as fast as his body could take him, beelining straight to the door. He was getting closer, and closer, and closer. He reached his arm out, fingertips brushing the metal, and then -

"Got ya, ya little shit!" The first burglar shouted into Axel's ear, grabbing his jacket tight. Axel panicked - he stopped, trying to tear off his outerwear while the criminal pulled him closer, and closer, a wide grin brimming on his masked face.

The man reached for his gun, snickering, "Should have kept your head down, kid..."

Suddenly, there was a rumble. Quiet at first but growing so loud that the nearby shelves and trinkets began shaking madly. The source of the noise, judging by everyone's eyes, was above.

"What the fuckin' hel - "

Before the words could escape his mouth the ceiling exploded open, tiles and pipes raining from above justice style. The worst of it, however, was the vent, which fell straight down with a loud WHA-UUMP!, heading straight for the burglar dome.

Before he could get out a "Shit!" the vent crashed on top of him hard, its length so, well long, that it tore through the nearby counter-tops, tables, and everything between, crumbling the store and one of its invaders underneath it with a thundering, floor shaking CRRRRSHHHH!! Axel stood there in front of the wreckage, eyes wider than the door behind him. Swallowing hard, he turned heel, and sprinted right outta there.

The second robber hauled ass, towards the escaping hostage with the look of a man who just watched his partner-in-crime crushed by an air vent. "Hey... you!" he shouted, voice as wobbly as his hand, which he used to reach to the floor and pick up his friend's firearm. He cocked it back, aiming to the back of the almost gone teen... and screamed as he heard a loud CRACK! and the gun in his hand was gone - as was one of his fingers. He crumbled to the ground, still crying, as the front door smashed open and a couple of armored men ran into the place, the letters S.W.A.T. stenciled... well, pretty much everywhere.

From out of the wreckage and rubble, the first burglar pulled himself out, one arm first, then with a loud "Urrrrgh!" his upper body popped out into the open air, gasping for air and cursing up a storm.

"How... how the hell?" He looked over, at the incoming police arresting his partner and the air vent next to his (probably destroyed) legs. "How... how did - ?"

A foot connected with his chest, sending him falling to the ground with an "Ooof!" He tried to sit back up but he was forced back down, the same foot keeping him hard in place. He squinted his eyes, trying desperately to get a look.

It... it was a girl, a teenager, with long red hair and glasses, looking down at him with an expression between a smile and a sneer. Behind her the end of the vent burst open, a small beanied kid craning his head out, looking as surprised as he was right about now.

"Jesus Eve..." Weston mumbled, grinning. "We really... raised the roof, huh? Ha ha ha!!"

"It's sorta the exact opposite of that but... whatever," she replied.

"Why...?" the robber croaked out, "... Why... would ya do this?"

Evanna leaned in close, pressing him back even farther until he couldn't do anything but wheeze. Then, she said, "The same reason most things are done. Revenge... and male incompetence."

#dnc #school shenanigans #circumcision

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