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buckysmith · 1 year

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He gets drunk

Includes: Alejandro, Grave, Ghost and Soap

Warning: Adult stuff, mention of alcohol use, 18+ stuff but not to heavy

(Has nothing to do with the headcanons I just love that song and listened to it while writing )

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Alejandro: (not my gift)

- he is actually a man who can stand a lot of alcohol

- he doesn't really like drinking games, but if Rudy challenges him, he's not the one to shy away from it

- as I said, he can stand a lot of the devils liquor but holy hell after an amount of it that could possibly kill any other human he’s not the stoic thinking Alejandro Vargas.

- He knows he’s a good locking man so it’s not unusual that some chicas or chicos flirts with him

- some of his team would call you in situations like that, not because he’s a cheater no. They would call you to pick him up because he gets whiny and grumpy about that your not here with him

- ofc you would pick your love sick husband up but to be honest, after one whole bottle of Mezcal he’s fucked up (just to remember you that would most possible kill any other person) and wouldn’t really recognize you

- at first he would tell you to go away cause he’s in a relationship

- when you want to take him with you he gets angry, telling you to fuck off cause he has the most beautiful, loving, kind hearted and attractive S/O in the whole world

- you would giggle about it, telling you your his s/o

- he would try to recognize your face but because of the darkness and way to much alcohol he just couldn’t

- but he would recognize your scent

- yeah, good luck going home after he recognized you

- cough instead horny cough

- anyways, even though he’s fucked up your night wouldn’t end quickly after you got him home

- oh and even in this state your his top priority ;)

(I’m sorry but I think drunk as fuck he would dance/ sing to that song Vamos a la Playa)

Graves: (not my gift)

- He hates drinking games more than anything else

- but if someone challenges him he can’t say no, his ego ist waaaay to big for that

- after a good amount of alcohol he would call you to take him home

- he knows he’s an attractive man so from time to time people would hit at him but he would causally show his wedding ring (he doesn’t even want to look at the people that want him)

- he knows he can’t drive and he doesn’t want to take an Uber (it’s just not safe as someone like him) so he would wait for you

- he would wait till you show up with another drink in his hand

- he’s not quite talkative on your way home, but he would lay his hand on your thigh, murmur a lot of sweet nothings and a lot of dirty things

- after you both got home he would ask you to take his clothes off

- cough alcohol makes him horny and you do too cough

Soap: (not my gift)

- he likes the taste of scotch that sharp, distinct flavor is what he likes about it

- The few times he has with his whole team are most likely to have a serious matter but the rare times when they can sit in a bar drinking with each other and don’t have to worry to get killed end most of the time with a drinking game

- he isn’t as good with alcohol as ghost or price but he would definitely try to win that stupid drinking game

- price would be the one that calls you

- soap would only sit in some corner, with a picture of you in his hand whining that he wants you to be here with you (he’s love sick)

- the moment you’re in front of him, kneeling between his legs and gently touching his cheeks would end with you back first in the wooden floor

- Ghost would definitely take pics/ videos of you too, most likely to tease soap after he’s sober

- You would take your big boy home

- he’s more on the cuddle side

- he wants you to touch him, to tell him sweet nothings and praise him

Ghost: (not my gift)

- no matter how much he drinks, he isn’t able to get drunk

- fr this man can drink stuff that could kill any other human and he’s still fucking sober (at least he seems to)

- But even though he isn’t the usual drunk man, he gets homesick or better he wants to go home to you

- he knows even though he’s still able to put one and one to two he’s not gonna drive home so he would call you

- he’s a ghost, the others wouldn’t notice that he disappeared (at least they would notice when he’s already over the hills)

- love sick puppy

- he had it rough and in times like that he needs you more than anything

- he’s quite emotional when he’s drunk, it’s most likely the only time he’s able to cry and to let out his feelings

- Cuddle with him, praise him, pet him, take care of him, you’re the one he needs the most

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shadow0-1 · 1 year

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Sausage party

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whatifitwasgttho · 3 months

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get you a giant boyfriend that is helplessly devoted to you

#g/t #g/t fluff #g/t art #giant/tiny #g/t community #g/t ocs #gentle giant #gianttiny #oc — alejandro #oc — rhaine #im not normal ahahhahaaha

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keeganbrainmush · 1 year

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" Watching the video that you sent me. " ; Alejandro Vargas x Male Reader (400 follower special!)

*ೃ Jesus christ tysm for 400 followers ALREADY even if I posted my first fic in March, tysm for all the support I love you guys so much *ೃ 2k words ; Male Reader ; Extreme NSFW mention, Minors DNI. *ೃ Summary: Alejandro decides to send you a teasing video while you're at a convention for a company you work for. Hours away, his pretty whimpers and begging for you getting to your head. *ೃ Contains: Overstimulation, teasing, nudes sent, begging, jerking off Alejandro, flustered reader, blowjobs, missionary, Service dom reader, praised Alejandro, bottom Alejandro, creampie

navigation.

You were happily talking to customers, asking them on your opinion of the companys product while writing their answers down. Your eyes were shining in friendliness, fake or not, it was sure making customers feel appreciated. You walked back to your station and sat down behind a table.

You felt your phone buzz in your back pocket, taking it out you saw Alejandros contact name. You smiled at his text as you read " Hi, Mi Cielo. Hope your doing well at your convention, missing you. I can't wait to see you again tomorrow! I love you." with a heart emoji. Tilting your head in confusion as a video was sent seconds later. " Hey, (Name)! " One of your co-workers named Henry called out.

You looked up and turned off your phone, stuffing it in your back pocket mindlessly. " Yeah, Whats up? " You asked as you stood up while facing Henrys pale, freckled face. " A customer wants to know about our policies, can you help me out? " He asked, scratching at the back of his neck nervously.

Henry had only been at your work for a solid 3 weeks before being sent out to the convention with you. Your supervisor told you he needed experience, and lord did he need experience. You nodded at him, patting his shoulder softly. " Sure thing, just stay at the stand and talk to the customers there. " Reassuring him, you walked off and began speaking to customers once again.

You had left Alejandro on seen.

Meanwhile, Alejandro at home wrapped up in your bedsheets with his chin on your pillow. Its been 15 minutes and you hadn't responded. He sighed and turned around on his back, getting up and grabbing a pair of sweatpants and walked into your kitchen, getting ready to make himself lunch as he overthought his video. Was it too much? Too needy?

You had finally finished up talking to customers and started walking over to your area again, rubbing at your back as you saw the clock. 5:21 PM. Convention should be wrapping up in 40 minutes. You suddenly realized you never responded to Ales text. " I'm taking 10. " You told your coworker, his hair bouncing slightly as he nodded. You walked off towards the bathroom while taking your phone out of your pocket.

Pushing open the door with your shoulder as your passcode and walked into a stall, leaning against a wall. Recieved 38 minutes ago. Shit. You rapidly started texting him back. " I'm sorry, Love. I got held up at work. Can't wait to see you too, Love you more. " You pressed send before looking at the blurry cover of the video. You couldn't quite distinguish what it was. A video of him cooking? A video of the gym? Only one way to find out.

And Jesus Christ. None of your guesses were correct even alittle. It was Alejandro filming himself infront of your pillow, sat on your side of the bed with his cock in his hand. And by the looks of it he'd been going at it for a awhile now. High pitched whimpering filled the bathroom as you rapidly turned the volume down nervously. " Mi Cielo, please. I need you home so bad, I can't cum without your touch. " He moaned needily.

The tip of his pretty cock was an angry red, precum seeping out of him and coating the palm of his hand as he continued stroking himself. The video was only 32 seconds long, filled with soft squelching sounds and moans with breathy whimpers, and those 32 seconds were enough to get you hard. You stared at the ending frame of the video with wide eyes, trying to ignore the tent growing in your pants.

You shook your head in attempt to clear your mind of the dirty thoughts clouding your thoughts. You cleared your throat nervously as you glanced at your hard cock pocking out of the pants of your uniform. Shit, Shit, Shit. You unzipped your pants and moved yourself around in a way of hopes of not making it as obvious. Thankfully, your company had insisted against skinny jeans and were fine with a relaxed fit. So your issue wasn't quite as noticeable.

You walked out of the stall and washed your hands with soap and water before walking out and headed back to your stand. Henrys eyes lit up as he saw you. " Hey! You're super red, you okay? " He asked, examining your flushed face. " I'm fine. " You responded shakily, looking at the time once again. 5:30. " Okay.. Can we pack up early? Most of the people have left already. " Henry told you, glancing around to the empty area other than other stands and kiosks. You nodded as you rubbed your forehead with the bottom of your palm.

You and Henry had taken 20 minutes to clean everything up and get it all packed up, so you both were right on time as you were making your way to the hotel in a rented car. " We leave tomorrow, right, Sir? " Henry asked, scratching at his upper lip. Your hand tightened around the wheel slightly as you thought about tomorrow. Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. " Yes. And don't call me sir, makes me feel old. " You teased, trying to take your mind off that beautiful video.

The next couple of hours were a blur. Getting dinner, packing up your clothes, and finally going to bed. You were only able to be tossing and turning with your mind clouded with lust. Alejandro just had to be a tease, didn't he? You were staring at the ceiling until you finally fell asleep, the last time you saw the clock it was 2:21 am.

When you finally woke up, it was a bunch of hurrying and and mumbling under your breathe to catch your flight back home. The plane ride was only a solid 3 hours, but your taxi drive back home was full of traffic and honking. You felt nothing but relief when you finally caught sight of your house, talking to the driver and paying him as you hauled your luggage to your doorstep and put your keys in, twisted it and pushed the door open.

There he was, Alejandro Vargas. The love of your life, your husband. " Hola, Lindo. " He welcomed you, pulling you into a hug with his hug on your shoulders. He was dressed handsomely, with a nice pair of jeans and a long sleeve compression shirt that showed off his arm muscles nicely. You hugged him back and nestled your face in the crook of his neck, breathing in the scent of his expensive cologne.

" I missed you so much. " He admitted, pulling away from your shoulder to give you a quick kiss while taking your hand in his. " I've only been gone 3 days, my Love. But I missed you too. " You replied, relishing in the feeling of his soft lips. " Are you hungry? " Alejandro asked, before pulling you into the living room. " No, Thank you. I ate breakfast afew hours ago. " You reassured him, sitting down next to him on the couch with your hand on his upperthigh as he leaned his head against your shoulder.

After catching up for half an hour or so, you finally mustered up the courage to ask the golden question.

" So, Ale. What was that video you sent me about? " You asked, grazing your thumb over the inside of his thigh as you looked at him while a light blush started creeping in on his cheeks. Alejandro looked back at you with wide eyes, his mouth gaped open. " Whats wrong, Baby? You miss me so much you got hard at the idea of me even looking at you jerking off? " You asked, sliding off the couch and spreading Alejandros legs to sit in between them.

Alejandro only let out small mumbles and squirmed in his seat, his cock slowly hardening. " Sí, por favor.. " He whined out, lifting his hips up slightly. You smiled up at him as you moved one of your hands to his crotch to palm him. " Huh? What was that? " You teased. He sobbed out silently as you touched him there, moving on of his hands to your shoulders. " Please, make me feel good. " He pleaded, his thighs tensing up as you continued to touch at his clothed dick.

" Thats a good boy, Ale. " You praised as you hooked your fingers at the belt rings of his pants. " I can, right? " You asked, reassuring consent. Alejandro nodded hazily as you pulled his pants down and only left him in his boxers, a small wet spot already forming. " What, You're already leaking too? " You mumbled as you pulled down his boxers next and took ahold of it at the base. Alejandro only sat there, looking down at you with desperate eyes, nodding at every word.

You passed your palm over his tip and rubbed the precum around his cock and started jerking him off slowly. Alejandro shuddered at your touch, putting his hand on the back of your head instinctively. " Shit, (Name). Mierda. " He curled his fingers in your hair as you took him in your mouth, swirling your tongue around his tip.

You continued pushing your mouth lower onto him until your nose was nestled into his pelvis, the head of his dick hitting the back of your throat. Alejandro gulped as he fought back every urge to fuck your throat, his chest heaving as he looked down at you. The last thing he expected was for you to be looking back at him, your eyes glossy with tears threatening to spill but also filled with a look of determination.

Just you looking at him like that was enough to make him cum down your throat with a loud whimper and an arching back, a sweet taste coating your tongue as you pulled back from him in shock and swallowed. " Did you just- " You stammered, as Alejandro finally came down from his high, embarrassment starting to creep up on him. He put his hands over his face and threw his head back, avoiding your gaze as you sat up on the couch next to him.

" Hey, hey, no. Its fine, it's kinda cute. " You reassured him, rubbing at his shoulder comfortingly. " Really missed me that bad, huh? " You teased, smiling at him. He moved one of his fingers and groaned, throwing himself sideways onto the arm rest of the couch. You laughed and rubbed at his hips and looked down at him lovingly. " I just wanted us to have amazing sex when you'd got back. " Alejandro admitted into the hands still covering his face.

" We still can, gonna feel alot better for you too. " You told him, hinting at something obvious. Alejandro looked up at you shockingly, acting as if you were the one with a filthy mouth in the relationship.

Which is how you got to now with your cock buried deep inside of Alejandro, his legs on the side of your waist and his forearm muffling his moans as he mumbled out small pleadings as you continuing fucking into his roughly, ignoring his several past orgasms. " Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. " Alejandro sobbed out, feeling himself close to cumming again.

" What, you gonna cum on my cock again like the dirty slut you are? " You panted out next to his ear, biting onto his shoulder as you felt him growing growing gradually tighter around you. Alejandro nodded as he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you tightly against him. " Oh my god.. " He mumbled out, his legs shaking as he sobbed out and arched his back once again, raking his nails down your back as you continued fucking into him, trying to desperately reach your own orgasm.

Alejandro hid his face in the crook of your neck, his brain fuzzy with overstimulation, while you continued thrusting into him until you felt your own orgasm crashing over you. You leaned down to bite at his neck as you felt yourself cum inside of him, your chest heaving as you looked at him after your hips stilled. " Was that amazing enough for you? " You asked, looking at him hazily while bringing a hand up to rub at his cheek. " That was more than amazing, Mi Cielo. Thank you. " He replied, bringing you into a soft kiss.

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saturncodedstarlette · 1 year

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Y/N : Fuck me if I’m right, but does chocolate milk from brown cows?

Alejandro, zero hesitation : You’re right.

Y/N : Really?

Alejandro, throws them over his shoulder : A thousand times yes, now let’s go find a bed.

Y/N : We don’t need a bed

#Cod #Call of duty #Call of duty incorrect quotes #Call of duty x reader #Cod Alejandro Vargas #Alejandro Vargas #Cod Alejandro Vargas x reader #Cod Alejandro Vargas x you #Cod Alejandro Vargas x oc #Alejandro Vargas x male reader #Alejandro Vargas x fem reader #Alejandro Vargas x gn reader #Alejandro Vargas x reader #Original : greeneyedgoldenchild #original : tumblr #Call of duty fluff #My 2023 works #1k notes

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sleepyconfusedpotato · 7 months

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Hi! I'm mostly a lurker :') but I really really love your art!

That said, I dunno if anyone asked yet, but what would Ghost and Task Force 141 (and Jade too!) be like on ice (ice skating and such)?

Hello (｡･∀･)ﾉﾞThank you so much for the love!

ICE SKATING HUH 👀 I have some HC for this, but I think it'd go like this : (I included Jade because you asked for it (❁´◡`❁))

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theeio · 2 months

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plague and alejandro dynamic in a nutshell

#draws #doodles #oc #alejandro #oc alejandro #plague #oc plague #fun fact this is an actual suicide hotline in singapore

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personwhowrites · 1 year

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Task Force 141 plus Alejandro reaction if you’re sick.

Sadly, I have gotten the virus after being out of my country. Funny how I’m the only one that got it out my whole family, I have been vacationed but still got it. I felt like I myself needed some comfort so this came up to my mind. Sorry if it’s dry, I passed out in the middle of writing and couldn’t bring myself to write more so this is my half finish thing.

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John “Captain” Price

This man is scared of getting sick himself. He will be in the between of helping you or just staying away from you.

If ge does stay away from you, this man will stay away. Need to use the bathroom? This man will literally run everything with bleach once your out.

He will spray the whole damn base with those Air sprays that claim they will help kill the germs.

He does somewhat help you, he puts food out by your door every few minutes for you. He does make sure to get everything you need.

He does become weak when you whine about wanting a hug. He will will hug you, but don’t be surprise when he appears with twelve medical masks on his face when he does hug you.

He literally won’t let any of the members see you, his scared of you getting them sick.

He checks up on you regularly when your asleep or knocked out by the medicine he bought you.

When he sees your doing better this man will come to your room. Grab all the tissues, paper and bags of your sickness and burn it outside.

He does sometimes stays in your room while you complain about being sick. It hurts him to see you all sick and tired.

He knows it’s a risk to be in your room for so long, yet he stays then sprays himself with the spray.

If he does decide to stay with you, this man will be on his knees for you.

He will get you whatever need, Hugs, cuddles and kisses. He treats you like baby not wanting you to get up unless is for the bathroom or to shower.

When you do shower he will be right in there in the bathroom making sure you can handle yourself.

In a relationship with him or not, he won’t leave your side at any point. Will waste his whole day taking care of you.

He lets you wear his shirts for more comfortable feeling when his gone. He loves to see you sleeping in his shirts. It does something to him that he doesn’t understand.

He makes sure your comfortable at all times. Even if it means getting sick himself.

He will also keep you all to himself, won’t let the others help take care of you. He will slam the door in their face and go back to you.

He lets you wear his shirts for mo

“Price… no! Your gonna get sick because of me.” You groan as he cuddles you close. “I don’t want you sick..”

“If it means getting sick.. to take care of you it’s worth it.” Price says kissing your forehead. “Now rest up, I won’t leave you..”

Kyle “Gaz”Garrick

This man will be scared when you get sick. If you say your dying he will actually believe it and cry about it.

He will stick to you like glue, literally..he won’t leave you alone for second. If you do mange to escape him into the bathroom he will wait outside.

He does wear a medical mask around you for safety measures and because Price told him to.

He will cook you anything you wish and sneak out the base to get you whatever you want. He risks his damn career for you.

When your sleeping he will sit next to your bed and remain there. Will ignore the others when they tell him to leave you alone to rest.

Talking about the others, this man will also push them away. Not wanting them to take you a way from you. He locks the door when you don’t notice so the others don’t come in.

He will listen to you talk about the most random things, even comment stuff himself.

He will have a bunch of movies at hand for you and him to watch. He loves holding you close as you watch the movies and laugh.

If someone for example Soap brings you food he will say he bought it for you. Jealous feeds into him, he wants you to himself.

When you need to shower he will get in with you. Sometimes with clothes or without clothes. He will clean you up and wrap you in the towel like a baby. He even goes as far to dress you and carry you back to the room.

He gets super jealous if call someone else to help you with something. He starts locking the door for that reason.

He begs you to wear his shirts, so he can feel more possessive over you. He knows it’s wrong, but he loves the feeling of owning you at times.

If in a relationship or not, this man will be on his knees for you. Caring for you as if you were a goddess, kiss you no matter how sick you are.

“Gaz st—“ you says before he plants another sloppy kiss on your lips. “Your gonna get sick!”

“This might sound weird but.. I don’t care, now come here!” Gaz says with a smile before suffocating you with his hug. “Your mine y/n.”

John “Soap” MacTavish

Sick? That word isn’t in his book. This man will kiss, hug and cuddle you. No matter how sick you are, it doesn’t exist to him.

He will buy anything you talk about. He doesn’t care how much it is, only for it makes you feel better.

Like Gaz he will want to keep you to himself. He is a person that starves for your physical touch. He will let the others come in and see you, but not for to long.

When your hungry he will try his best to cook you food. Sometimes burning it, but hey it’s the thought that counts.

He does order food for you and him a lot. He try’s his best to give you all you could want while your sick. He does have to ask price to get some medicine since he doesn’t want to leave your side.

Germs doesn’t exist to this man. You sneeze? He will kiss you right after you clean your nose.

He will praise you for the smallest thing you do, even if it’s just turning to face him.

He loves holding your hand at all times, making sure you can feel comfortable with it first. He will kiss it too when your distracted looking at something on the Tv.

When you need to shower, he will do that for you. Washes your hair the most gentle way and scrubs your body the best way he can without causing harm for you. Making sure the water is warm at all times.

After the shower he will make you wear his shirts and poke at you since it’s slightly big on you.

In a relationship or not he will still hug you tightly and make sure your treated well. He doesn’t like seeing you sick ether, it pains him.

He lays down in bed with you when your ready to sleep. He won’t move an inch while you hold him tightly in your sleep. He will ignore all his needs and only pay attention to you.

He gives you massages and lets you talk about anything, like anything that comes up to your mind he will have a whole conversation until you fall asleep.

He feeds you, like baby feeds you. He doesn’t want you to lift a finger for anything unless it’s needed, like really needed.

He does clean the room when your sleeping without a need to hold you. He will make sure someone else watches you while he goes outside quickly to burn the bags of tissues away.

“..Soap?” You mumble hugging his arm. “Aren’t you worried you will get sick?”

“Sick? Please that word exist to me.” Soap responds looking at you and kisses your forehead. “Now get some rest, you need it for being so strong today.”

Simon “Ghost” Riley

This man is somewhat like price. He will try to avoid your touch when your sick. Mostly like a regular for him, but if he sees your getting worse he will react.

He will stand by your door and watch you sleep. Like a stalker vibe watch. Price will have to move him away at times to let you rest.

He isn’t one to get physical with you, yet he grabs your hands at times when your crying about being sick.

He doesn’t like you being sick, it makes him feel scared. (Shocking!) He try’s his best to confront you.

He brings you some food at times and watches you eat so he is sure you are getting the energy you need.

His silent when his in the room with you, he just sits then and watches you. Like a hawk, he only makes himself known when your about to get up for something.

When you need to shower he will stand outside the bathroom door. The others will try to ask him why, but he will remain silent until they realize the water is running in the bathroom.

When your sleeping he will lay next you and play with your hair, it’s the only chance he gets to be near you. One where you won’t ask questions about it and there is silence.

He loves it when you just ask him to stay when he gets up from the chair across the room.

Confesses his love for you while you sleep. It’s the only way he can get himself to tell you, he does it pretty much every time you sleep.

When he sees your gone form your room when he went out with Price to get medicine he will panic. Like badly panic and search the whole damn base for you only to realize you fell asleep in the bathroom.

He cleans after you, making sure the germs don’t stay in your room to long.

Now if you were in a relationship with this man. He won’t leave you alone like Gaz. He will protect you with his life.

He does lock the door when your asleep so no one enters and bothers you. Soap once came in the middle of you sleeping and screamed thinking it was funny. It wasn’t for ghost who immediately ran after him.

He holds you tightly and makes sure you sleep in one of his hoodies. So when his out on something you won’t feel alone.

He loves holding you close and will admit to you, knowing you will forget the next day about it.

Praises you like Soap, but way more. Blink? He will praise you for it, sometimes you tease him about it.

“Night Ghost.” You say laying down and immediately falling asleep.

“Mhm..” Ghost hums before waiting a couple minutes. “..I love you..”

Alejandro Vargas

This man will be taking care of you like a queen. Some similarities to Soap. He will make sure nothing bothers you.

He will cook you dozen of meals you wish for. Rodolfo softly jealous because of it.

He will make sure your comfortable, happy and good with everything around you.

Gives you a rose with every meal, morning or any activity you do with him.

He does take good care of you, giving you all the attention you could ever need from a man. He does go overboard at times without knowing it.

Like soap, he will give you a bath, but way more over the top. Putting roses, candles and romantic music in the background.

He does make you do activities all the time. He doesn’t want you laying down for to long, he thinks that’s how sick people get worse.

His does get scared when your sick, he has a bad pass with people in his life dying to sickness. (Cannon in my au)

He fears that you will be gone from him. Making him always be there for you, even ignore work for some time. Rodolfo does drag him back to work though.

In or not in a relationship with him he will still take care of you. Making sure your alright since your Wally important to him in his life. He does worry sometimes that you will be gone too long form work and comes to check on you.

Like the others he will burn the bag of germs away. He doesn’t want anyone else in his team getting sick. Pains him to see sick people at times knowing he can’t help sometimes.

He has someone watching you when his away.

He always makes sure to leave you some sort of gift around the house. So you have the energy to get up and do something.

“Mi Amor! Come on get up.” Alejandro says tugging your arm. “I don’t want you laying down to much.”

“I don’t wanna…I’m tired.”. you mumble softly only to hear a small cry form him. “Never mind! Let’s do this!”

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skylarsblue · 1 year

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✦Incorrect C.o.D Quotes, Again✦

Guess who's back...back again-

Ghost @ DILF!Y/N: Stop making me have gay thoughts, General. I look at men and I feel weird. I feel strange. It makes me wanna do things. I don’t like that.

(This also works with Soap, of course)

-- (Based on that one Avatar moment that set the fucking bar for me. Also, bonus random name of an NPC) Ghost: Oliver is the best sniper. DILF!Y/N, real softly over Ghost’s shoulder: …well I don’t want Oliver. Ghost, a man with daddy issues: Ghost, internally: HOLD IT THE FUCK TOGETHER SOLDIER, WE’LL GET THROUGH THIS

-- Y/N: I was gonna say that if in ten years time, the two of us aren’t married, let’s agree… Gaz: Yeah? Y/N: To hunt each other for sport. Gaz: T-To hunt each other for sport?- Y/N: Yeah! D-did you just agree?! Gaz: I thought you were gonna say like, y’a know, let’s get married! Let’s- Y/N: Oh! Oh. Gaz: I’ll be your Gilligan! Y/N: I didn’t mean- the signals-

-- Gaz: Sorry! I thought I saw a wasp. Y/N: Do you love me too? Gaz, breaking his neck: Excuse me?

-- (NSFW warning) Y/N: Like- no I know it’s bad but bro I- he makes me such a whore. Soap: Okay like, on a scale of one to ten- Y/N: I’d let him cum on my glasses Soap: ON YOUR GLASSES?! Oh it’s serious. Y/N: I KNOW

-- 141: *looking at knocked out Graves* Y/N: I’m gonna check his pockets. Alejandro: For weapons? Y/N: No, to see where he keeps the fucking audacity. Soap: *wheeze* No no, bad timing, don’t be funny this is serious.

-- Y/N: You wanna go toe-to-toe with me, pretty boy? Alejandro: Go for it.~ I’ll give you the first shot. Y/N: Better make it count, casanova. Alejandro: I never half-ass anything, mi girasol. Ghost: Oi, keep your pants on and focus, would ya?

-- Soap: Missed me missed me now you gotta kiiii…. Simon: Now I gotta what? Soap: Nothin’ forget it- Simon: No no, now I gotta what?

-- Y/N, surrounded by attractive men: Am I…a whore? Y/N: *looks at them* Y/N: I don’t really give a fuck, HEY TEAM-

-- Gaz: Why are you just…laying on the couch? Usually you’re up and doing something. Y/N: Can’t move. Soap: Why?? Y/N: *sits up on their elbows and allows their neck to be seen* Gaz: *gasp* Nooooo… Y/N: Mhm. Soap: Nuh uh. Y/N: König carried me here. >:) Gaz: YOU WHORED! Y/N: I DID!!

-- Someone: Please PLEASE don’t tell anyone. Y/N: I won’t! I won’t, promise. Someone: *sigh* Thank you. … Price: *doing paperwork* Y/N, busting in: CAPTAIN!! Price: BLOODY FU-What in the world?! Y/N: *shuts his door and smoothly sits on his desk* Captain you will not believe what I have heard.

-- Soap: I’m gonna stop listening to drama. I’m gonna focus on my training, be a better person- Gaz: Right, right. Y/N, popping in: Guess who got caught sucking dick in the bathroom. Soap & Gaz: WHO?! Soap: *falls out of chair*

-- Price: Be nice. Y/N: I’m always nice! Price: Really nice, not bitchy nice. Y/N: …you tied my hands but fine.

-- (With a random backstory I have in my brain for König) Y/N: How do you uh, deal with all this trauma? König: I call my mutter. Y/N: That’s beautiful, K- König: Call my mutter a bitch.

-- Gaz: GIRLFRIEND STOP, GET BACK IN THE CAR Soap with zero self preservation instincts: *sprinting with a pipe bomb* YOU GET BACK HERE!

-- Y/N: This entire team is full of babygirls. Gaz: Oh not that fucking meme- Soap: Full of huh? Ghost: Call me that and I will snap your spine. Y/N: Bring it! An honor sir! Price: Jesus Christ-

#the dilf ones are for my own enjoyment #i have a dilf oc and this is how i get it out #call of duty x y/n #call of duty x reader #call of duty #konig call of duty #konig x reader #captain john price #john price x reader #kyle gaz garrick #gaz x reader #john soap mactavish #soap mactavish x reader #ghost x reader #simon riley x reader #alejandro vargas #alejandro vargas x reader #incorrect cod quotes

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