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a-kaash-me-outside · 1 year

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not fair - ch4

in which your boyfriend is perfect in every single way... except for one and kei can't just sit back and watch you suffer...

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// "what? you want to watch me fuck your ex?" ~ ᴛsᴜᴋɪsʜɪᴍᴀ ᴋᴇɪ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ x ʏᴀᴍᴀɢᴜᴄʜɪ ᴛᴀᴅᴀsʜɪ ~ 12431 ᴡᴏʀᴅs

a look into this chapter/tw: 18+ minors dni super nfsw!, cheating (seriously, major plot point), threesome, cucking, vouyerism, size kink, weird feelings, use of character first names, degradation, oral m!receive, dom/sub undertones, coming untouched, stop light system, dirty talk, name calling, coming twice, plot-heavy, cross posted from ao3, afab reader she/her pronouns

send an ask and i’ll add ya to the taglist! ~ ♡ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢs ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ᴍᴇᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ♡

If you could’ve never returned to this place, you wouldn’t have. If you could’ve left it all behind, ran away from the thought of confrontation and explanation, honest to God, you would have.

You waited it out as long as you could, made do with the things you had at Kei’s place so that you didn’t have to go back to that house, to the space you and Tadashi had once shared. It was annoying, sure, having to figure out how to function without any of your things, but it sure beat the alternative.

You wanted to convince yourself that this was the rest of your life, living down the street from everything you’ve ever known and owned, but never making any attempt to bridge the gap.

But you couldn’t survive like this, you knew that, not without your entire wardrobe and your laptop and all of the furniture that you could have considered yours.

So, yes, if you could’ve never returned to this place, you wouldn’t have. And, absolutely, if you could’ve left it all behind, ran away from the thought of confrontation and explanation, honest to God, you would have, but unfortunately, that’s not how it works, this whole having an affair with your boyfriend’s best friend thing.

So you were there, begrudgingly, standing in front of the front door that you used to push through every single day without a second thought, the key weighing heavy in your pocket as you opted to knock instead because it wasn’t yours anymore with Kei in tow behind you to lift all of the things that you had no interest in moving and also just because you’re not sure you could have done it on your own.

When Tadashi answers the door, when you see him in front of you for the first time in two months you realize that maybe you’re not the only one that’s been sulking in dread since the moment you made these plans. He looks good, better than you expect him to look considering the circumstances, but maybe you just had low expectations.

He doesn’t greet you, doesn’t acknowledge Kei behind you. He barely looks you in the eyes as he speaks, detached, but not nearly as annoyed as he has every right to be. “Most of your stuff is still upstairs except for the few big things in the living room and kitchen.”

You can see past him inside the house, can see everything in seemingly the same way that you left it, picture-perfect and undisturbed, but you don’t make any move to break the barrier, not even when he turns on his heel and nods towards the upstairs. It’s not until you feel a strong hand on your lower back, encouraging, but not pushing, that you snap out of your own thoughts.

“I’ll start on the few things in the living room and kitchen and you can get whatever you need upstairs. We’ll be out of here fast,” Kei assures, because he knows that you need some type of affirmation just to step inside the house.

“Right.”

You expect it to be this big feat, this huge mountain to conquer, stepping back into what was once all you knew, but it’s not. You step over the lip of the front door, carefully and cautiously, and when the tip of your shoe skids across the welcome mat, you feel no different than you did on the car ride over. You can still feel the tightness in your chest and your palms still feel clammy, but that’s it.

There isn’t any realization that hits you as you walk into the living room, nor is there a huge revelation that takes over you as you peer up the stairs and imagine your old room just the way you left it. When Kei’s hand leaves your lower back, when you’re on your own in foreign grounds, you’re okay. It’s not this dramatic, overwhelming experience. It doesn’t have to be.

It’s the same thing walking into your old bedroom. This task that you’ve been dreading for as long as it’s been set in stone, and even before, feels, dare you say, manageable. It’s not the same as how you left it. For one, the drawers to Tadashi’s dresser are closed neatly and his bag isn’t lying open on the floor with miscellaneous clothes hanging half out of it. But more than that, the bedspread is completely different down to the sheets and the pillowcases and the curtains are changed, the ones that you helped Tadashi pick out, and the entire room smells like him. This room is no longer a culmination of the two of you, it’s undeniably his just with the pieces that you left behind.

“I would’ve packed it all up, but I didn’t really want to touch it,” Tadashi comments, sliding an empty box towards you as you approach your dresser.

He’s not lying. You notice, now, how your things are all untouched, strewn across your dresser in the same way that you left them before the fight: a bottle of fragrance with its cap on the other side of the dresser, an open moisturizer, a burnt-out candle, things that could have been tossed without a second thought that he couldn’t so much as push to the side.

“No, yeah, that’s fine,” you reply, shaking your head as you start to clean up the mess you left all those months ago.

It’s not a monumental feat, sure, but it is so disgustingly awkward.

The room is quiet save for the sounds of scrapping furniture from the floor beneath you and the sounds of drawers opening and closing. You have nothing to say to one another anyway. No, that’s a lie. You both have things that are clawing at your throats, things that are fogging your heads so badly that it feels almost hard to breathe, but neither of you is saying any of them.

For you, it’s mostly apologies, better ones than what you left him with that night or what you left on his answering machine numerous times, ones that you’ve thought endlessly about, ones that you mean wholeheartedly even if he wasn’t to accept them, ones that are trying so hard to come out, but are trapped.

You don’t know what it is for Tadashi, what’s going on in his mind right now, or why he looks so conflicted and distracted. You have a few guesses, inclinations that feel right given the situation you’re both in, but you don’t prod. You move in silence, slinking past him a few times before you notice that he hasn’t moved in a while, stuck in the same place with the same facial expression with the same book in his hands.

You stop pacing, stop packing your things. He doesn’t notice your cease in movement, or if he does, he doesn’t show it. You want to say his name, call out to him and ask if he’s okay, because you’re not sure that anyone’s asked him that in a while, but you can’t get it out of your throat. Instead, you reach out, gently wrapping your fingers around the book and pulling it out of his grasp.

The contact doesn’t shock him, but it does prompt his moving. He lets his arms fall back to his sides and he turns to look at you, really look at you, for the first time since that night.

“I don’t,” Tadashi sighs, “why?”

“What?” you ask, because those three words, despite how filled they are with emotions that you can’t quite place, aren’t enough for you to understand.

“You said that it was bad… with me… but how bad was it?” he asks, so slowly that you’re sure he’s handpicking every single word.

“I-,” you start because you don’t want to leave the question that he’s been internally struggling with all day unanswered, but then you stop because you just can’t fathom answering a question like that. Out of all the things you thought you were going to talk about today, your failed sex life with Tadashi was definitely at the bottom of the list. “Sorry, what?” you ask again, not because you needed him to repeat, but just because you needed time to think.

“How bad was it? Our sex?” he asks again and you struggle to identify the tone that he’s trying to convey. You want to hear the annoyance, the hatred, the disgust, the judgment, but you can’t find any trace of animosity. You don’t reply, still trying to conjure up some sort of response, so he keeps talking, desperate for an answer, “How could he be so much better?”

And then you hear it, not sadness or betrayal, but confusion, no, curiosity.

“I think about it a lot and I can never come up with an answer that makes sense, but I think it’s just because I don’t know enough,” Tadashi continues, mumbling now.

“Dashi,” you start, hesitating for a moment only because the nickname feels so foreign on your tongue, “I don’t really know how to answer that.”

“Honestly,” he says, the curiosity still lingering, but a sense of urgency and entitlement motivating it, “That’s a good place to start.”

“It might be because you don’t know enough,” you offer, using his own words to try to soften the impact. “Kei knows what he wants and he’s precise and he takes care of me, not because he has to, but because he gets just as much pleasure from it as I do.”

He flinches at the sentence but nods along anyway.

You feel like you’ve said too much already, but Tadashi’s facial features have morphed into a look of intrigue and you can’t help the details that continue to spill from you, “I think with us it was like we were both…” you trail off, trying to find the right words, “Kei has this control, this power over me that I can’t explain, one that you never did.”

You watch the intrigue shift into something else for only a split second, something that looks eerily familiar in this setting nonetheless. He shakes his head, brows furrowing as he fights off the conflict that he’s feeling. “I just, I don’t get it. It doesn’t make sense to me and I wish that it did. I wish that I could understand how he could be so much better than I am,” he says, exasperated and frustrated. “If I could just see-” He doesn’t even get the chance to finish his sentence.

“What? You want to watch me fuck your ex?”

The voice comes as a shock to both of you, backs turned away from the doorway that Kei now stands directly in the center of. His arms are crossed over his chest and he doesn’t have to be towering as tall over top of you as he is for you to feel as small as you do, but it definitely doesn’t help.

You’re not exactly sure why you’re feeling this embarrassed. It’s not you that the question is directed at and it’s not you that’s almost pathetically incriminated by your own words. It feels like Kei knows something now that he shouldn’t. That conversation was private, the things that Yamaguchi was admitting to you were private, and now Kei knew them all. You don’t know how much he heard or how long he had been standing there, but you know that it was enough to warrant the permanent cocky grin on Kei’s face. It’s borderline ironic, the embarrassment you were feeling from the lack of privacy given that this is exactly what landed you here in the first place.

“Is that what you want?” he asks, louder this time, a patronizing laugh following right behind it.

“Kei,” you begin to object, but he puts his hand up, pointer finger extended up to quiet your attempt to de-escalate the situation, and it works. Whatever argument or defense that you were going to spew has dissolved into nothing.

Kei walks forward, slowly, towards the two of you. He doesn’t say a word, gives Yamaguchi ample time to protest, but he doesn’t. Yamaguchi is standing next to you, stuck in place, his eyes perfectly on Kei as he approaches you.

“Do you want to watch me do all the things to your ex that you couldn’t? Do you want me to physically show you so that you understand?” Kei asks Yamaguchi, but he’s staring directly at you, closing the gap between his lips and your face, leaning down so leisurely, waiting for some sort of objection from either party.

His lips brush up against your ear, his breath floating over top of your skin so lightly. Your eyes flutter closed, your breath already uneven as you wait for the contact, but it never comes. Instead, it’s just words, confirmation and the antecedent that you’re so used to by now. “You know the scale, baby. This works the same way, okay? If you get uncomfortable, just say the word,” he says into your ear, soft enough so that Yamaguchi can’t make out what he’s saying.

You nod and he presses a kiss to your ear, “Good girl.”

He pulls away far too quickly, his absence just making you want him more, but he’s facing Tadashi directly now, forcing his gaze, not physically, but just from the command of his stare. “I’m going to need some sort of verbal consent before I destroy your ex right in front of you, Tadashi,” Kei says and the tone of his voice is so perfectly reminiscent of how he used to talk to you in the beginning, stern and abrupt enough to elicit a response from anyone, especially someone as awestruck as Tadashi.

“Yes,” Tadashi answers, finally. You’re expecting some sort of withdrawal, or regret at the very least, to settle in after and you think Kei is too, but it doesn’t, not even in the pause that Kei allows once Tadashi’s finished speaking.

“Yes, what?” Kei asks, tilting his head to the side.

“Yes, I want to understand,” Tadashi responds, the confidence in his words quickly decreasing as he realizes how humiliating it all actually is.

“No,” Kei denies, his attention fully on you once again, his hands sliding up the sides of your neck to cup your face between his palms.

“What?” Tadashi asks, evidently confused as he watches Kei begin to touch you.

“No. That’s not what you’re saying yes to,” Kei explains, softly stroking the sides of your face, “You’re saying yes to sitting there and watching me fuck your ex. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Tadashi says, dimly and not nearly as confidently as the first time, but it’s an agreement nonetheless.

The second that the confirmation comes out of Tadashi’s mouth, you hold your breath. You don’t need to see the way Kei’s wicked grin spreads across his face or feel the way that his fingertips dig into the back of your neck to know that he was going to put on a show for Tadashi tonight at your expense.

Kei steps backward, your face still clutched in his grasp as he drags you with him, 4 long strides until he’s colliding with the edge of what used to be your bed. Tadashi’s left standing in place, his back to the dresser as he watches Kei sink into the bed until he’s seated with both of your legs on either side of his own.

Kei hooks both arms around your waist, pulling you into him, hard, until your stomach is pressed against his chest, and then down, slowly, so that your body rubs against him until you’re seated in his lap. He nudges your head to the side, exposing your neck and humming at the clean canvas in front of him.

He drags his teeth down the side of your neck just hard enough for you to feel the path even when he’s pulled away. He replaces his teeth with his tongue, running the tip of it against your skin before sucking patches of it into his mouth. You let your eyes close gently, focusing on the feeling of his tongue repetitively swiping against the sensitive areas of your neck, and for a moment you forget that Yamaguchi is in the room with you entirely.

Kei molds his hands around your body, letting them conform to your curves as he slides them to your waist and plants them there, tightly. His fingertips dig into your sides, holding you perfectly still as he grinds his hips up into you. You couldn’t hold it in if you tried, the whimper that escapes your lips at the feeling of his growing length.

Kei laughs loud enough for everyone in the room to hear it, shows you both how pathetic he thinks you are for acting the way you do in response to such a small movement. He moves his fingers, grabbing at the hem of your shirt and lifting it over your head, quickly throwing it to the side. You have no time to even think before he’s unhooking your bra, kissing down your neck to your collarbones as he discards it as well.

You’ve been naked in front of Yamaguchi plenty of times before, but it’s so different now. Kei is undressing you as he wishes, stripping clothing off of you at whatever pace he wants. You have no control of what Yamaguchi sees or doesn’t see and it’s making you flush in a way that you never have. You’re sure that they can see it, both of them, the way your body is reacting so involuntarily to whatever Kei wants to do to it.

He pulls off his own shirt so that he can feel his skin against yours so that he can show Yamaguchi how in control of the entire situation he actually is and you’re so acutely aware of how fast everything is moving. His fingers are on the button of your pants, working so effortlessly to undo them, kissing down your chest as he does so before pulling away.

“Go on,” Kei states, a smirk pulling at his lips with his hands planted firmly at your hips, “Show Tadashi everything that’s no longer his.”

You hesitate, not moving despite the fact that Kei’s thumbs are pressing into your hip bones, pushing you backward. He doesn’t push harder when he feels the resistance. He stills, cocking his head, holding back a scoff as he speaks again, lower, almost offended, “Do I have to repeat myself?”

You shake your head, standing up from his lap and slipping your thumbs into the waistband. “My underwear too?” you ask because you don’t want to get it wrong.

“What do you think, Tadashi?” Kei asks, looking past you now at Tadashi standing in the same frozen place that he was minutes ago.

“Yes,” he answers, perhaps too eagerly for how quiet he is.

“Wrong.”

Tadashi jumps, unaware that the question of what he was thinking had a wrong answer, but he tries again regardless, “No?” It comes out more like a question.

“Wrong,” Kei repeats.

Tadashi opens his mouth, brows knit together in confusion. Kei doesn’t help him, doesn’t offer guidance, but you know exactly what he wants to hear. It’s quiet in the room for a few moments as Tadashi tries his hardest to understand, to get it right.

“What do you think, Kei?” he finally answers.

“Good boy,” Kei praises, only letting the gentle cadence linger for seconds before directing his attention back at you, hand slipping into his own waistband as he strokes himself to attention inside his pants. “Take ‘em off.”

You pull them down, facing towards Tadashi as you discard them. You can feel eyes trained on you, both Tadashi’s and Kei’s, and it’s causing a heat to rise into your core and the highs of your cheekbones. You don’t have time to revel in the feeling of exposure that’s taking over you, because Kei is already calling you back over. “Come be a good girl for me.”

When you turn to face him, you watch him spread his legs, his head tilting down to the floor between them as he pushes his pants and boxers to his ankles, exposing himself completely. He doesn’t look any bit remorseful or embarrassed. If it were at all possible, you’d be convinced that he looked somehow even prouder than before, being on display in front of your ex as he barks out commands that you listen so well to.

And you do listen, walking over and taking place between his legs on your knees, sitting back into your heels as you wait for whatever he tells you to do. You know this game well, know how perfectly obedient you have to be when he gets like this, how small of an error you have to make to be punished. “Be on your best behavior, now, okay? We’ve got guests,” he coos at you, sliding his fingers under your chin and curling them against your skin.

You nod, once, just a short movement of your head for him to know that you will, indeed, be on your best behavior. No taking your own liberties or trying to get a rise out of him on purpose or pushing the boundaries of what you could and couldn’t do, you were going to be good.

You sit there, perfectly still, not moving at all as he wraps his hand around the base of his cock, angling it down so that his head rubs across your lips, smearing the beads of precome that have already accumulated. He places it gently between your lips, parting but not passing them.

“Lick your lips, baby. Taste it for me.”

You run the tip of your tongue against your bottom lip and then the top, staring directly up at Kei as you do so, savoring each drop that he left behind. Your tongue barely makes it back in your mouth before he grabs your face. “What do you say?”

“Thank you,” you say, urgently, overlapping the end of his question, but he doesn’t seem to mind, not when your gratitude to him is so instinctual.

“You want more, don’t you? You want to feel it down your throat, don’t want to be able to breathe, right?” he asks, already lining himself up between your lips.

You answer without hesitation, “Yes, please, Kei.”

In an instant, his hand is on the back of your head, fingers laced into your hair as he pulls you down on his cock in one fluent motion. It takes everything in you not to gag at the way his head jams against the back wall of your throat. He holds you there, your lips at the base of his cock as he groans at how warm you are around him.

You’re waiting for him to pull you off completely or, at the very least, give you a moment to catch your breath, but he doesn’t. Your hands are gripping onto his thighs and your eyes are shut so tightly trying not to tap out, trying to show him and Yamaguchi how good you can be for Kei.

“Stay there, baby, you’re doing so good,” he praises, but you can barely focus on the words. The grip on his thighs is getting weak and he can feel you trying to gasp for air around his cock and he still has so much more planned for you so he pulls you forcefully off of him. He uses the fistful of your hair to guide your attention, your chest heaving and mouth agape trying to get in as much air as you can. You can feel the spit dripping down your chin and are only now aware of the tears streaming down your cheeks.

“Look at Tadashi. Show him how pretty you are when someone knows how to use you,” Kei coos.

You turn your head just far enough to make eye contact with Tadashi and however you thought that he was going to react is completely thrown out the window. He’s staring at you, wide-eyed and timid, swallowing thickly as his eyes scan every inch of your face. He might even be more affected by Kei using your throat than you were.

“Isn’t she pretty, Tadashi?” Kei asks, talking about you as if you weren’t sitting right between his legs.

Tadashi nods but doesn’t say anything, too shocked, you’re sure, to form thoughts, let alone sentences and responses.

“Back at me,” Kei commands, any ounce of adoration gone from his tone now, “Open.” You move to turn back to Kei and you catch it so briefly, the tent in Tadashi’s pants that twitches at the sound of Kei’s voice.

You open your mouth as wide as you can manage, breathing consistently as you wait for his cock. He slips back into your mouth, more attentively this time, letting the underside of his cock slide against your tongue so that you can feel every pulsing vein and wrinkle of skin. “Close your lips around it, nice and tight like a little hole for me to fuck, okay?”

You hum around his cock in acknowledgment and form a tight ring around him. “I’m going to get as deep as I can and you’re going to swallow around me.” You hum again, the vibrations of your lips causing him to shudder. “Keep your eyes open, look directly at me.” There’s this authority in his eyes, one more intense than the ones he’s had in the past, one that’s so sure that you’re going to obey him.

And you do. And you will.

He pulls you deeper onto his cock until your face is pressed against his skin. You struggle to keep eye contact with him in this position that he’s forced you into, but you still do, desperate to keep listening to him. You swallow around his hard length, allow the ring you’ve made around his cock to loosen for only a moment as you suck in all the juices that you’ve created so that you can swallow again. Your throat massages his length and his head and you know how good you’re being for him because the fist he has in your hair tightens, his fingers shaking as he mutters a fuck .

“Fuck, look how well she listens,” he groans, talking about you, not at you once again and you can feel yourself flood because of it, from being talked about, over top of, as if you’re not even in the room, like you’re not on your knees being used like a whore. “I’m going to fuck her throat now. I think she’s earned it, being such a good girl for me.”

Kei continues, “Watch closely. You’ll see how much she loves being used like this.” He starts moving your head up and down his cock, letting your spit coat his cock and drool onto the base. It’s forceful, but it’s not the worst that you’ve endured with Kei’s cock in your mouth. Until he lifts his hips off of the bed to meet your face, thrusting upwards to slide down your throat as far as he can and as hard as he can.

He wraps his fingers around your neck to feel the bulge that he’s created. He presses his fingers into it, groaning as he massages his length through your throat, simultaneously not allowing you to breathe. “God, you’re so fucking good.” You swallow around him again, trying to pleasure him in whatever way you can, trying to prove to him that you’re so fucking good, but you can be better. You stick your tongue out, gagging at how deep he is, convulsing around his thick cock.

And then your mouth is empty.

You look up at Kei, clearly now that your head isn’t bobbing violently around his cock. You can see his toned chest rising and falling and the look in his eyes of fading composure and you feel much prouder than you probably should given the amount of control you even had in that situation. “What?” he asks, breathy, but still just as much of an asshole, “Do you want a prize for doing what you were supposed to?”

He doesn’t give you time to answer. He leans forward, his mouth positioned directly above yours and you know what’s coming so well that you open your mouth before the word has even finished coming out of his mouth. He spits down your throat, harshly so that you don’t even have time to appreciate the taste.

“Thank you,” you say without prompt.

“On the bed. On your back. Legs spread. Heels into the mattress,” Kei barks out, paying no mind to your gratitude, despite how much he knows you want to be praised for it. He stands up from the bed, giving you room to crawl onto the middle of it into the exact position he’s described.

“This is how you liked to fuck her, huh, Tadashi? Missionary? Was it so that you could see her pretty face while you fucked her?” He grabs your face, rests your chin in between his thumb and his pointer finger and then claws all five digits into your jaw. He jerks your head in his hand, showing you off to Tadashi, your eyes half-lidded just waiting for Kei to finally fill you.

“There’s no way it could look as wrecked as it does when I fuck her, so I don’t really see the appeal for you,” Kei says, and then he stops moving, turning with your face still in his hand as he looks at Tadashi, “Or was it because you just didn’t know any better?”

Tadashi doesn’t answer, not with words anyway, rather, he mumbles something inaudible. Kei ignores whatever he’s trying to say. It was a rhetorical question. He didn’t need Tadashi to answer. He already knew the answer.

Kei moves onto the bed, right in between your legs. He hasn’t touched you, has only used your mouth for his own pleasure, and yet, you’re so dripping wet that there’s already a dark spot on the blankets below you. He places an open hand on your stomach, pressing down to hold you in place as he rubs the tip of his cock between your lips, moaning at the feeling of your wetness slicking his head.

“Sit,” Kei commands, but it’s not to you, it’s to Tadashi. He doesn’t point or gesture, just stares at the edge of the bed that neither of you is occupying.

Tadashi listens after a moment of reluctance, taking slow, careful steps towards the side of the bed that Kei was looking at, as if moving any faster would result in punishment. You can feel the dip in the bed and you turn your head to look at him. There’s uncertainty painted all over his face, but the curiosity still remains.

Your attention returns when you feel Kei push inside you just enough for you to swallow his head. He moves his hand from your stomach and his hand from the base of his cock and he uses them, now, to grab any part of your body that he can touch. He lets his fingers curl over your skin, kneads your tits and brushes his thumbs against your hard nipples, scratches red marks down your neck and chest, anything to keep your focus on him and not the third-party observer.

You’re so busy focusing on how handsy he is, on thinking about where his touch will float to next, that when he slams inside of you without warning, a high-pitched scream tears from your abused throat. His hips are pressed against the insides of your thighs and he doesn’t move, just stares down at your doe-like eyes as you silently beg him for more.

He pulls out of you, leisurely, feeling how tightly you’re squeezing around him, suctioning him back in. When he fucks into you again, you’re more prepared this time. The sound that leaves you isn’t a surprised scream, it’s a thankful groan. You know that if he wanted to, he could make you come in seconds, but he’s drawing it out, letting Yamaguchi watch how destroyed you get from such slow, methodical movements.

When he sets a nice pace, fucking in and out of you, purposefully missing your g-spot so that the pleasure is coming only from how deep he’s going and how full you are, the surprise aspect fading away, for now, you’re intently aware on how close Tadashi is sitting next to you. If you were to reach out your arm, you could touch him. He was there, sitting on the bed, watching you get fucked better than he could ever manage.

You turn your head to face him once again. You want to know what he looks like while he’s watching you and it doesn’t disappoint. His lips are parted so slightly and they’re sheened from spit as he keeps licking his lips and swallowing harshly. Your eyes follow his neck and his heaving chest and you catch a glimpse of how hard he is for only a moment before Kei’s hand is grabbing your jaw, forcing you to look back at him.

“Don’t look at him,” Kei snaps, his hips slamming into you harsher now, the sound of them slapping against your thighs getting louder, “Look at me. Focus on me. Don’t pay attention to him. He’s just there to watch. I’m fucking you.”

You stare up at him, eyes unfocused as they dart around Kei’s face and you want to listen to him. You want to be absolutely faultless for him, but when Kei mentions that Tadashi is just here to watch you, Tadashi whimpers. It’s soft and you can feel the embarrassment radiating off of him the second that it happens and you want to see him.

Your eyes wander for only a moment, flicking to the side to see if you can catch a sliver of whatever Tadashi looks like right now. The entire situation is so new, everything is developing so quickly, and you want to listen, but you’re just as curious as Tadashi is. Kei’s fingers dig into your chin harder, his hips pressed flat against yours in an instant as he speaks through gritted teeth, “Do you want him to fuck you?”

You start shaking your head, verbal disagreement coming out of your mouth, but he interrupts you, “No, that’s fine. He can fuck you and I’ll leave if that’s what you want.”

“No, no, no, no, please, Kei, I’m sorry,” you babble, the words leaving your mouth on pure necessity, “I’m so sorry. Please don’t leave. Please fuck me.”

“Then fucking pay attention to me,” Kei pulls out and fucks the breath right out of your lungs, “only me.”

Any amount of curiosity you could feel doesn’t outweigh the need you have to be fucked so rawly right now. Tadashi isn’t even a second thought anymore.

“Yes, fuck, okay,” you nod, tears filling your eyes as he starts to pound into you again, “only you,” you murmur repetitively as he picks up speed. You don’t ask before clasping your fingers together behind his neck, pulling his head down to your level, and pressing his forehead into yours, but he doesn’t protest. His chin is pressed against his sternum, looking down at your body and the way that every inch of his length is being swallowed by your hole.

He can feel you tightening around him like you always do when you’re about to come. You don’t even have to tell him anymore, he just knows, but you know that he likes to hear you anyway. You talk softly, the admittance feeling like betrayal given the other person in the room, but your want to appease Kei overrides that tenfold. “Gonna come,” you murmur.

“You want to watch her come?” Kei asks, and Tadashi doesn’t even try to hide behind reservation, “Like, actually come? Not fake it like you typically see her do?” Tadashi’s nodding fervently, no remorse or apprehension to his desperation. “Well then, let’s show him how good you actually look when you’re coming all over a nice, thick cock, (y/n).”

He picks up the pace, pistoning into you faster than he was before, reaching one of his arms down to rub tiny circles into your clit, and angling his cock to rub against your g-spot right as you reach your edge. You pull Kei into you deeper as you come, your fingers gripping around each other and Kei’s neck as you clench around him. Thank yous are leaving your mouth incessantly, one after the other so quickly that they’re overlapping.

He doesn’t stop after you’ve finished, keeps going with his repetitive motions that brought you over the edge, knows that you’re already feeling sensitive from your first orgasm and uses that to his advantage. “That wasn’t enough. Come again. Show him how much power I have over you that he never did.” And you do. You’re screaming this time, nails digging into the back of Kei’s neck as he brutally fucks into your hole as it floods even more.

“Look at Tadashi when you’re finished. Tell him how good it was,” Kei says, and you don’t see his face, not when you’re so delightfully blissed out from two consecutive orgasms, but you can hear the smirk in his tone. Kei pulls away from your grasp and without the grounds that his strong body was giving you, your arms fall to your sides. Your head falls against the pillow, ear flat against it as you look at Tadashi.

“It was really good, Dashi. He made me feel so good.” It slips out of your mouth without much thought, your brain on autopilot, just listening to Kei’s directions and you only notice the weight of them as Tadashi’s eyes widen. He’s marveling at the power that Kei has, at how quickly you listen to him, and how harshly he made you come in such a short amount of time and it looks like it clicks.

It looks like he understands now, the difference between him and Kei, the reason that sex with him wasn’t as good, how Kei is so much better than him, why Kei deserves the attention you’re giving him, why he deserves to be ignored, and he’s not mad. He wants more.

“How else did you like to fuck her?” Kei asks and when Tadashi doesn’t answer right away, he continues, “I know that there aren’t a lot of options to choose from, so this shouldn’t be too hard.”

Tadashi speaks, stammers through his words because no matter what answer he comes up with, it won’t be a confident one, “Um, I- Doggy style.”

“Yeah?” he asks as if he didn’t know all along what his answer would be. “On all fours,” he orders. “Face Tadashi so he can actually see what you look like when you’re getting wrecked, okay?”

You turn over, positioned on the bed on your hands and knees with a direct line of sight on Tadashi who is staring at you in awe. No matter how humiliating this is for you, it’s nothing compared to what Tadashi is sure to be feeling right now, but it seems like he’s soaking in it. You feel Kei move behind you, hear him spit onto his cock and then line himself up, pressing forward between your lips.

Kei roots both of his hands onto your shoulders and you close your eyes in anticipation. He pulls you back onto his cock, thrusting his hips to meet you halfway. He uses the grip on your shoulders to control his movements so precisely, to dictate how much of his cock he’s giving you, no matter how much you’re begging.

“You want more, sweetheart?” He lets the name drip off of his tongue like venom-laced honey. You’re not sure if he sees the shock that washes over Tadashi’s face or if it even matters to Kei, the exact reaction that it pulls from your observer. All you know is that you get to see it in full view. You watch the astonishment settle in first and then the disbelief, all followed by betraying arousal. The tent in his pants twitches, a small dark circle forming at the very top and you can’t take your eyes off of it.

Kei’s thrusts are getting rougher, the sound of his hips against your ass matching the volume of your moans and drowning out the tiny whimpers that are coming from Tadashi. Kei’s name comes out of your mouth, breathy and sandwiched between moans that he’s coercing out of you, but that won’t do.

The sound of his palm flat against your ass fills your ears before the sting sets in or the warmth starts to spread. “It’s okay. Say my name nice and loud while you’re getting fucked from behind,” Kei coaxes, the back of his hand making contact with your already red cheek, “It’s not like he hasn’t heard you say it before.”

Tadashi groans, embarrassed and trying to hold back how turned on he is by the whole situation. You close your eyes. You can’t bring yourself to look Tadashi in the face right now, can’t muster the courage as you listen to Kei. His name leaves your mouth much clearer now, actually audible this time. “Because who’s the only one that can make you feel good?” he asks, fucking into your g-spot with such purpose.

“You, Kei, fuck, you’re the only one that can make me feel good, Kei,” you moan, “You’re the one that’s making me feel so good. ‘m close already, Kei, fuck, all because of you.”

“Already close?” Kei asks, snickering as he does. “You’re about to come for the third time, aren’t you, sweetheart?”

You nod because all he has to do is say the word and you’ll come around him again. You want it so badly, for him to let you come again. You’re waiting for it, breathing softer so that you don’t miss the words, but they don’t come, not in the way you want them to, at least. “Why don’t you ask Tadashi if you can come? He’ll tell you when to come.”

Your first thought is to ask why, but you know that’s not your place. You open your mouth to obey, to ask Tadashi if you can come, but Tadashi is the one questioning, “Wh- What?”

Kei answers so matter-of-factly that you’re sure his intention is to make him feel stupid for even thinking it. “Well, you’ll never make her come so you might as well have the privilege of telling her to come and then watching her actually come.”

Tadashi doesn’t look any less confused than he was when Kei first said it, but he listens nonetheless. He doesn’t wait long, the falter probably coming from him trying to find the right words rather than to control your orgasm. “I- Yo- You can c-,” Tadashi stutters through. It feels awkward coming out of his mouth, any sort of power. You can tell how much he hates having this sort of control, how uncomfortable he feels telling you what to do.

But you’re still close. Kei’s still hammering in and out of you relentlessly. You’re about to let go, reveling in the feeling of Kei slamming into you while waiting for Tadashi to finish his sentence just as you would let Kei finish his when Kei pulls out of you in one quick motion.

“No,” is the first word to leave your mouth followed by the same word over and over again, “no, no, no, no.” You were so close, completely on the edge, only needing permission to actually come and it was ripped away from you so easily. You feel so empty, clenching around nothing now as your high leaves you so quickly.

Kei laughs from behind you and you’re not sure who exactly he’s laughing at, you begging so desperately for him to let you come, to slide back into you so that you can just feel him inside of you, or Tadashi who is sitting there, so fucking hard, like his life has been changed in that single instant. Control was dangled in front of his face and it was gone instantaneously, or maybe, it was never there in the first place.

“You’re nothing,” Kei laughs, “You have no power over her. Only I do.”

Actual tears are forming in your eyes. You arch your back, trying to get his attention. You just want his attention. “Kei, please, please, no, please make me come, Kei, please,” you beg. He lets out another breathy laugh, clicking his tongue at how pathetic both of you are.

It all happens in the same moment. He grips onto your hips, digging his fingers in so harshly that you can feel the crescent moon indents that he’s making. He pulls you backward, violently, but controlled. And he commands, so spitefully that doing anything else would have felt like you were personally wronging him.

“Come for me.”

He doesn’t fuck you through your orgasm, but you don’t need him to. Just the feeling of him filling you to the brim with his fat cock is exactly what you need. Waves of pleasure ripple through you and you can feel it in every inch of your body, but somehow, that’s not the most important thing that just happened.

You’re about to close your eyes, to just relish in how good Kei can make you feel from doing so little, how grateful you are for him, but then you see it. You see Tadashi’s face scrunch into ecstasy, the dark stain on his pants growing as the tent throbs and twitches, untouched. The strangled noises that are coming from his throat demand to be listened to and you can’t take your eyes off of him as he comes, unabashed only as he rides his high. His hips are thrusting upwards into absolutely nothing and you’re positive that you have never seen him look this wrecked while he’s come ever.

The second that he stops grunting, the moment that his cock stops twitching against the fabric of his pants, he places a hand over his mouth. He breathes heavily against his palm and the distress sets in. His cock is still hard even after he came, untouched and unintentionally in his pants to a command that was meant for you. Kei notices right away, pushes past the surprise that even he’s experiencing to taunt Tadashi in this perfect state he’s in right now.

“You just fucking came and you’re still hard seeing me buried deep inside your ex?” Kei asks. Previously, Kei let Tadashi’s captivated eyes answer the questions. He didn’t need words, not when he knew exactly what Tadashi was thinking and what he was trying to say without even really saying it, but this time, he wanted to hear him. “Answer me.” The strictness in his voice makes you tighten around him on instinct.

“Yes,” Tadashi answers, his voice fragile as he continues because he knows it’s not enough to satisfy Kei, “Yes, Kei, I’m still hard.”

“So you are capable of lasting more than one round? (y/n) said that you couldn’t,” Kei smirks, knowing fully well that he has an entire arsenal of things, just like this one, that you told him in confidence, that you thought would never get back to Tadashi. “Well, you might as well come on purpose this time.”

Tadashi’s voice is as shaky as he is as it leaves him, “C- can I?”

“Can you what?” Kei questions, tilting his head to the side. He knows exactly what Tadashi wants, but he wants him to work for it.

A flush falls over Tadashi’s soft features, intensifying until you can see it in the tips of his ears. “Can I touch myself while you fuck her?” It’s the clearest thing he’s said all night. It’s quiet, but each word is crisp so that Kei can’t miss a single one.

“Are you going to listen as well as (y/n) does?” he asks.

“Yes, Kei,” Tadashi answers, quickly and assured.

“You better make yourself last for once. I saw how quickly you came without even touching yourself. Make sure you don’t come as quickly as you usually do, understand?” Kei asks, pulling out of you, slowly so that you can feel his entire length as it leaves you.

“Yes, Kei,” Tadashi repeats himself, his voice wavering as the realization hits him, how much Kei knows about his sex life. He fumbles with the waistband of his pants, pulling them down as quickly as he can manage.

Tadashi isn’t small. You know that. You’ve told Kei that. And yet, compared to how much bigger Kei is than him, how much girthier and how much longer his cock is, you can’t help but notice a difference, to feel like Tadashi should be insecure with his size. Kei scoffs as he watches Tadashi wrap his fist around his cock. “I guess (y/n) wasn’t lying when she said I’m able to hit all the spots you never could. Might be difficult for you to.”

Precome drips from Tadashi’s head, his cock twitches at the mention of his inadequacies, and he’s nodding right along to Kei’s humiliation. His strokes are unsure at first, hesitant and slow as he adjusts to the thought of touching himself to you getting fucked by his former best friend.

There isn’t a single part of your sex life with Tadashi that Kei doesn’t know about, Tadashi realizes now. Every tiny detail and major part of your intimacy has been laid out in front of Kei to nitpick and assess. He knows everything. He didn’t even get to consent to it, to the humiliation that he’s feeling so heavily now, and somehow that just makes it hotter for him.

He’s in such a submissive headspace now, feels himself slipping with no regard into a place of listening and only doing what he’s told and he doesn’t want to go back.

“C’mon, baby, you gotta show Tadashi how good you ride me,” Kei says, helping you to your feet before lying on the bed, his hard cock standing straight up for you. “Give him something to jerk his small cock to, yeah?”

You swing your leg over top of him, pressing your knees into the soft mattress as he lines himself up with you. His head is sliding between your lips, slipping so messily against your pussy from how wet he’s made you and how many times you’ve come around him.

You arch your back, pushing backward until you feel his head enter you and then you don’t stop. You keep pushing backward until you engulf every inch of him with your warm walls. Your chest is resting on his as you slide up and down, your tits rubbing against him as you fuck yourself with his cock. You run your fingers through his hair, pushing stray strands out of his face as you look down at him. For all the talk that he does about how ruined he makes you look, he hasn’t really taken into account how he looks when you have an ounce of control.

“You never rode him like this, have you?” he asks, swallowing thickly as you circle your hips and shake your head, biting down on your bottom lip as you fuck yourself as meticulously as he normally fucks you.

“No, baby,” you shake your head, a look of faux concern gracing your features as you coo down at him. This is what happens when he gives you an inkling of control. The smirk that’s normally on his lips finds its place on yours and the dazed look on your face finds its place on his and typically he soaked in it, in letting go and giving you the reins if only for a few minutes, but he had a reputation to hold up, one of demands and steadfast power.

He sits up, one arm wrapped tightly around your waist and the other arm extended behind him, giving him some sort of leverage as he pushes you up as well. You’re fully seated on his cock now, can feel it so deep inside of you that you never want to move. His fingers mold around your ribs, pressing into the bones as he picks his hips up, lifting you with them.

He leans his forehead against your shoulder biting small nips into your flesh as he raises you up enough to fuck his cock into you. Any amount of control that you had moments ago is gone now as grips onto you tightly, grunting as he moves both of your bodies in time with one another.

He never pulls far enough out to make you miss the feeling, fucks you by moving only inches, but you’re crumbling so quickly paired with everything else. You can’t move, don’t want to even if you could. He has such a death grip on whatever he can reach of you and you can feel his hot skin in every single place that it’s making contact with your own. You have no idea how he’s managing to fuck you so brutally when he’s so close to you the entire time. The backs of your thighs feel like they’re on fire from how hard he’s thrusting up into you. Your legs are shaking and you don’t even notice how hard you’re breathing until you watch him kiss your chest.

“Kei, I’m gonna come,” you mutter, swallowing whatever’s in your mouth because your throat feels so dry, “I’m gonna come, Kei, fuck.”

“No,” he scowls, his cock ramming into you harder now, “Don’t. Not yet. Not until I tell you you can.”

“But, Kei, please,” you choke out, “Please.”

“What did I just say?” he asks, impatient and testing and you know that you shouldn’t push it any further, but your core is tightening and your pussy is throbbing around him and you can hear the sounds of Tadashi whimpering as he jerks himself off barely 2 feet away from you and it’s so much.

“Kei, I need- please-”

With the position that he’s in, he can’t reach you with his hands, they’re far too busy. You know that if you were in any other position, his hand would be on your throat or in your hair or against your cheek at the first sound of disobedience, but he can’t. He can’t put his hands on you and also keep destroying you so perfectly, so he sinks his teeth into your neck, rolls the skin between them before migrating down to your collarbone and doing the same thing there. You can feel the imprints of his teeth, the marks that he’s leaving behind with the lingering pain and it’s making it that much harder to hold it.

“I won’t repeat myself again,” he grunts into your skin.

“Yes, Kei,” you oblige, closing your eyes as he continues his pace. You try to let your mind wander, to find other things to focus on while you’re getting fucked so good , anything to distract you from how close to the edge you actually are.

You hold it for much longer than you think you will. You just want to make him proud. You can feel the sweat on his forehead as it slips against your shoulder and you can see the shine of his stomach and feel his grip getting weaker and you’re confident that he can’t possibly make you wait for your reward any longer. Your cunt is clamped around him so tight that you’re not even sure how he’s still able to fuck you so consistently.

His thrusts slow four times. You count every single one, every slow fuck into you. If you had been with Kei for less time, you’d think he was giving you a break, but you haven’t. You’ve been with Kei for a handful of time now, know him and how he fucks you so well that you’re barely surprised when he starts fucking you even harder. You’re barely phased when he lifts you with his hips so harshly, keeps you in that position with one solid grip, and then rams into you with a force you didn’t think he could muster in this position.

“‘m sorry, Kei, I-,” you breathe, tears forming as you rest your cheek against his head. “‘m so sorry. I can’t hold it. I can’t. I can’t.”

“Hold it,” he orders, so sternly that disobeying him feels that much more satisfying. Your eyes roll back in your head, your body begins to fall backward, but Kei holds you in place. With the way you’re positioned, how your weight is pushing back on his arm, he can’t pick you up anymore, can’t fuck into you as deeply as he wants to. Instead, he keeps you seated on his cock as he circles his hips, rocks them against you so that you can feel him move inside of you, against your g-spot and it’s absolutely ruining you.

He lets you fall backward now, flat against the bed between his legs. You’re barely cognitive after how hard you just came, but he pulls you out of it. “I told you not to come,” he says, grabbing your face in his hand and guiding your gaze so forcefully that your neck hurts. His harsh grip fades, but his touch still lingers, soft now, as he scratches gentle lines into your neck. “But you couldn’t help it, could you?” he asks.

You shake your head, a confirming noise leaving you in response.

“I just make you feel too fucking good?” he asks, but not really. He’s not really saying it for you. He’s saying it for Tadashi, for him to hear not just once from him, but twice, repeated back how much power Kei has.

“You just make me feel too fucking good, Kei, I’m sorry,” you apologize, eyes boring up at him as you try to catch your breath.

“See? You can’t make her come even when you try so hard, but she can’t stop herself from coming for me,” Kei says, looking away from you and towards Tadashi on the edge of the bed. He’s nodding along, hanging onto every single word that comes out of Kei’s mouth, wanting to listen to just how much better he is than him.

“Because you’re pathetic, sitting there, jerking yourself off while I fuck your ex, huh?” Kei taunts, cocking his head. His condescending tone makes Tadashi throb in his own hand as he tugs on his cock desperately, moaning affirmation.

“Am… Am I doing good, Kei?” he asks, all caution thrown to the wind now as he flat-out requests praise. He wants to hear the same praises that you were being told. He wants Kei to call him a good boy again.

“Are you doing good?” Kei repeats the question, standing up and walking over to him, lowering himself to look directly at his cock. “I don’t know. Show me.”

Kei doesn’t touch Tadashi, isn’t even close enough for Tadashi to feel his breath, or the ghost of potential contact, but Tadashi looks like he’s trying so hard. “Yes, Kei.” His strokes are more methodical now, less haphazard as he pays attention to his grip and his pressure and the way that his thumb swipes over his head.

Kei’s eyes don’t leave Tadashi’s cock as he directs you, “Come here. Legs off the side of the bed right next to Dashi.”

It takes everything in you, every ounce of strength you still have to move where he wants you to. You’re so close to Tadashi now that you can feel the heat radiating off of him, can hear the sounds his hand is making sliding up and down his cock so well now.

“You’re doing so good, Dashi,” Kei finally says, his fingertips hovering over Tadashi’s thighs, but not touching. “Such a good boy for me.”

Tadashi’s strong strokes falter, stutters so noticeably that the words that come next are no surprise. “Can- can I come, Tsukki?” he asks, the nickname slipping from his lips unapologetically as you both watch him stroke himself faster.

Kei could have edged him for hours, would have loved every second of it, but you’re not sure if Tadashi could’ve handled him like you could, not yet at least. “Since you asked so nicely,” Kei smirks, “Come for me like a good boy.”

Tadashi nods enthusiastically, thanking him repeatedly as he thrusts up into his hand, his strokes becoming sloppy as his breathing gets heavier. Kei watches him, eyes fixed as Tadashi spills over his hand, coming in thick ropes that shoot up onto his shirt, adding to the mess he’s made on his clothes today. “Thank you, Kei, thank you,” he says coherently as soon as he’s caught his breath.

Kei stands up, barely moving to get in between your legs. You reach your hand up, letting it fall over his stomach, trying to touch him in whatever way you can. “Are you going to use me to make you come, now?” you ask, innocently enough.

He doesn’t reply, just slips inside of you so quickly that you can feel him stabbing inside of you. There’s no waiting for you to get adjusted or giving you a moment to take in the fullness, he’s just fucking into you relentlessly now. “Are you going to make me come?” he asks, matching your tone with a bit more arrogance.

“Yes, Kei,” you reply, the words being fucked out of you right alongside your breath with every stab inside of you. You squeeze around him, your tight hole massaging his length, coating him with the slickness from how drenched he’s made you.

“Play with yourself,” he groans, “Wanna see you play with yourself.”

You snake your hand down to your clit, rubbing exaggerated circles into your sensitive nub, whining Kei’s name as you bring your fingers to your lips and suck your taste off of them.

“I’m going to come so fucking deep inside her and you’re going to eat it all out. Every last drop,” Kei orders Tadashi. Your pussy clenches at the thought, tightening around Kei’s length as his hips stutter at the sudden tightness.

“Please, please, wanna feel you come so deep, Kei, please,” you beg, grabbing onto his wrist in desperation. You can see his resolve slipping, can feel his cock begin to throb against your walls. You place one hand on his cheek, coiling your fingers against his skin. But it’s not the touch that does it or the way your throat is so raw that your words come out weak, it’s Tadashi that pushes him over the edge.

“Wanna eat your come, please,” Tadashi says so softly, so sweetly that even Kei couldn’t deny it.

Obscenities leave his mouth as his chin falls to his chest, pushing himself so deep inside of you that you can follow the pulses of his cock from the base to the tip. Each throb is another stream, another rope of come that fills you fuller and fuller. He doesn’t move, doesn’t fuck it deeper into you and let it coat his length. He stills, his hips pressed into you until he drains himself completely inside of you, not letting anything drip out.

You don’t want him to leave, don’t want to feel empty, but you know what’s coming next and the thought is making your toes curl. “Dashi, on your knees,” Kei instructs and you hear the thud instantaneously. “Don’t you dare waste a single drop.”

“No, I promise,” Tadashi swears eagerly, more ready than he’s ever been to eat you out.

When Kei pulls out of you, there is only a momentary second that you can count, a beat of cool air against your sloppy pussy before Tadashi’s lips are placed around it, his tongue diving so deep into you that you’re almost convinced that Kei’s never even gotten that deep.

Your pussy is so sensitive from Kei’s relentless pounding and your own touches to your clit that you feel a familiar heat rise into your stomach. Your hands are shaking as they part Tadashi’s soft hair, grabbing onto it gently so you don’t disturb him. Though, you’re certain that you couldn’t tear him away from between your legs if you tried.

His tongue is delving into your hole, using the tip as a scoop to coax out any bit of cum that is too deep for him to shallowly lap up. He places his lips around your hole and sucks, pulling any drops that he can’t get out with his tongue, suctioning as hard as he can. And when you’re positive that you’re no longer filled with cum, he doesn’t stop. He continues to run his tongue between your lips, pressing the flat of it so mercilessly into you, flicking the tip against your clit so perfectly that it almost feels intentional.

It’s not, God, it’s not. The amount of times that you tried endlessly to help him understand, to show him what you needed never proved to be successful, but in this moment in time, it’s perfect. Everything about this second, this experience is perfect and it doesn’t matter how convenient of an accident it is.

“Kei, Kei, I’m-” You’re staring up at Kei, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes, swallowing harshly, “He’s- he’s gonna make me come.”

You’re not even sure that Tadashi heard you, so focused on getting any last morsel of the cum out of you, any remnant that Kei left behind, so sensitive, so much.

“Fuck, that’s so good, Dashi,” you reposition your hands in his hair, not guiding, just to ground yourself. “That’s so good, don’t stop.”

Kei calls down, tells Tadashi to play with your tits as he goes, tells him that it’ll drive you crazy and he does. It does. It’s not as meticulous as when Kei does it, because of course, it’s not. His fingers aren’t as long as Kei’s and they don’t move as rhythmically as Kei’s, but his tongue is diving into you with an intent he’s never had before and you’re so sensitive and it’s so much and-

You’re coming, hard, right against Tadashi’s tongue, rolling your hips, not because he’s doing anything wrong or because you need something more, but because you can’t help yourself. Your body is reacting on its own, grinding onto Tadashi’s face, fingers so tight in his locks that he’s whimpering against you, but he doesn’t stop.

Tadashi couldn’t do this on his own. You know that more than anyone. You’re not even sure that he was trying to make you come. You’re sensitive from Kei, on edge from him filling you so full without letting you come, and Tadashi pushed you exactly where you needed to be with the head start he was given.

“Fuck, you’re such a good boy,” you moan when you can finally see straight. He hasn’t stopped, no one’s told him to, and Kei doesn’t look like he intends to, but you’re so sensitive that it almost hurts and you want to see his face, so you rest your hand on his shoulder. “Dashi, you can stop, you did so good.”

“Can- Can I come again?” he asks, looking up at Kei, his face still hovering over your pussy.

“Are you hard again, Dashi?” Kei asks, overwhelming shock showing on his face, whether it’s intentional or not.

Tadashi shakes his head, “No, but I- I have to come. I want to come so badly.”

“Then come, Dashi, you’ve earned it. You finally made her come for once. You’re not completely useless after all,” Kei says, watching the bliss take over Tadashi’s face as he speaks, “Come for us again. Show us that you can listen and be a good boy for us and maybe we’ll fuck you again.”

It looks almost painful, the way his eyes squeeze so tightly and his mouth opens so wide as the most strangled noise comes out of it. He rocks against his own hand, his heavy breaths against your sensitive pussy feeling so warm. He just wants you to be proud of him, for both of you to be.

“So good, Dashi, that’s a good boy,” you praise.

When his eyes flutter open again, when he regains whatever amount of coherence that he can, he thanks you. Neither of you has even touched him tonight and, still, he looks so grateful. You can only imagine how wrecked he’ll look when you actually get your hands on him. The thought stops you in your tracks. You look over at Kei and how he’s looking down at Tadashi in awe and you wonder if he meant it, what he said about fucking him again.

“Here, let’s get you into bed,” you say, sitting up. It feels weird being on this side of it and not completely in Tadashi’s position, being tucked into bed after being wrecked so hard. He doesn’t refuse. He lets you and Kei help him to his feet and get him into bed. You know how taxing it is to be in that position for the first time, for sex to finally be good for you, even if he barely participated in the actual act itself.

“I’m still mad at you, y’know,” Tadashi mumbles as you pull the blanket up over his chin. “I have the right to be mad at you, both of you.”

“Dashi,” you say as you exhale, but he cuts you off.

“I’m not finished,” he says, “I’m still mad at you because it was a really shitty thing to do to me.” He pauses, not trailing off, but letting you both really hear the words, “But I think I understand now in some weird way, not just how our sex was not good at all, but how important it is.”

“I’m sorry, Tadashi, honestly, I am. I should have told you. I should have talked to you about everything and I didn’t and I’m sorry,” you say, letting the apology that’s been in your brain for weeks finally come out.

“I know,” he says, yawning now as everything catches up to him. “I know and it’s not okay, but it’s getting there.”

You go to reply, open your mouth to respond, but Kei stops you, shaking his head as he gestures to the way that Tadashi’s breathing is even now and his eyelids are no longer fluttering. Then, he gestures to the door, picking up your clothes from the floor and handing them back to you before putting on his own.

There are boxes scattered on the floors, an ample amount of things that are not packed up that should be. Honestly, this room is far more of a mess now than it was when you got here, but at least he’ll feel okay pushing your things to the side now.

You shut the front door, locking it behind you with your key. Kei waits for you patiently, his hand extended out for when you’re ready to grab it. You intertwine your fingers with his.

“Not necessarily how I thought moving your things would go, but I’m not mad about it,” Kei says, breaking the silence.

“Of course you weren’t, you had two people to control. What a dream come true for you and your superiority complex,” you joke, though it’s not really a joke. He knows that. He doesn’t mind.

You walk hand-in-hand, forgoing the car that’s parked in Tadashi’s driveway and making the quick commute back to Kei’s on foot. The fresh air is nice and you’re almost positive that if you were to sit down, even just in the front seat of a car, you wouldn’t be able to get up.

“I can’t believe it,” you say, “how has fucking you both ruined and begun to repair my relationship with Tadashi?”

“I’m just that good,” Kei scoffs, shrugging as if it were obvious. You push your shoulder into him, letting him lose his balance and regain it all by himself. You squint your eyes at him. He laughs before correcting himself, “I think he just didn’t know that sex could be that good, just like you didn’t.”

You’re about to take his answer as it is, let it slide and continue on with your conversation. It makes sense to you, especially having grown in the same way Tadashi had, albeit more so, but this was his first time. His response is enough to make you feel content, but he continues, for himself or for you or for Tadashi, you’re not sure. “Tadashi’s never been good at being honest with himself, at knowing what he wants, let alone voicing those wants to other people when he finally figures them out, and that’s fine bu...” Kei pauses, letting you hang onto every word of his observant explanation, “that just means without someone there to help… without us there to help,” he corrects himself, “sex is going to be really shitty.”

You hum. You thought that you were happy with the answer before, but this one sits with you so much better, and yet, even with his mention of you both helping him, your question still comes out not nearly as confident as you need it to be. “Were you serious about fucking him again or did you just say that to make him come?” you ask into the brisk air.

“I was serious,” he answers quickly, “Have I ever said anything to you just to make you come?”

You shake your head in response, swinging your arms together as you come to conclusions, make connections in the silence between the two of you. “So, do you think we could do it again?” you ask, “But a little different next time.”

“Different how?” Kei questions, and you tell him. Maybe you’re a bit too excited, but as soon as you start talking, the ideas keep coming. They don’t stop, not as you step inside of your house or as you step into your bedroom or as you flop onto the bed or as you get under the covers.

“Is that really what you want?” Kei asks when you’ve finally finished talking.

You nod, not saying a word because you’ve talked a lot as it is and your throat is still sore.

“Then, yes, I think he’d love that,” Kei agrees, pulling you deeper into him and mumbling a final thought into your hair, “And I would too.”

taglist: @daddyjackfrost @karasunoya @girlwith-kalei-do-scope-eyes @itsmeteiiteii @omiivr @cyueksims @kei-tsuki21 @ks-tsukki @snazzyturtles @rinniemybeloved

send an ask and i’ll add ya to the taglist! ~ ♡ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢs ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ᴍᴇᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ♡

#tsukishima x reader #tsukishima smut #tsukishima kei x reader #hq smut #haikyuu smut #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #tsukishima x reader smut #yamaguchi x reader #yamaguchi smut #yamaguchi x reader smut #toriwritesshit #not fair!

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a-kaash-me-outside · 1 year

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not fair - ch3

in which your boyfriend is perfect in every single way... except for one and kei can't just sit back and watch you suffer... previous | ch3 | next [masterlist]

// "you ruined me too, i guess." ~ ᴛsᴜᴋɪsʜɪᴍᴀ ᴋᴇɪ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ~ 7589 ᴡᴏʀᴅs

a look into this chapter/tw: 18+ minors dni super nfsw!, cheating (seriously, major plot point), a bit heavier angst in this one guys, use of character first names, degradation, choking, face-fucking, dom/sub undertones, face slapping, stop light system, squirting, dirty talk, name calling, coming twice, plot-heavy, cross posted from ao3, afab reader she/her pronouns, this is actually the chapter i stopped at before being commissioned to write the last three parts

send an ask and i’ll add ya to the taglist! ~ ♡ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢs ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ᴍᴇᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ♡

You hadn’t spoken to Kei in almost 4 months, not at all.

You went from messaging him daily, constantly, seeing him 5-6 times a week, getting coffee with him, having him come over for dinner, hanging out with you and Tadashi to absolutely nothing. You couldn’t help yourself when you were around him, couldn’t stop thinking about him when you weren’t around him, so you had to cut him off. After that night, coming home and crawling into bed with Yamaguchi, his arms wrapping around you, they didn’t feel right. They weren’t as strong as Kei’s. Everything that he did reminded you that he wasn’t Kei. You could feel every mark that Kei had left on your body and you were missing him so much that your heart physically hurt. It had to stop.

When Yamaguchi asked why you guys weren’t talking anymore, you almost started crying. You told him that you guys had gotten into an awful fight and that you couldn’t talk about it. Though it was technically a lie, it seemed convincing enough. Every time that he would try to ask about it, you would get emotional, tears flooding your eyes and heart feeling heavy. He stopped asking about it after a while, just accepting that you weren’t ready to talk about it. He was kind like that. He was conflicted, not knowing whether or not to drop everything with his best friend. You encouraged him to go see him if Tsukishima wanted to and he did.

Everything about Yamaguchi was kind and sweet and everything that you should have wanted, but not being with Kei for the past few months really showed you how difficult it was for you to be with someone like that. Tadashi would listen to you rant about your favorite TV shows, make you breakfast in the morning, tell you all of the things about you that he loves, but every inexplicably nice thing that he did made you miss Kei’s antics even more. You missed when he would make fun of the plot holes in your garbage TV shows, how he would groan at you and throw things when you tried to ask him to make you breakfast, how special he would make you feel when he would tell you the things he loved about you. You were convinced that it was just your obsessive mind, that something was wrong with you.

Not above everything else, but a large chunk of the reason that you missed him, was how great you were together in bed. Nothing was the same without him. You barely even wanted to try to make yourself come. Even when you succeeded the few times that you did, you felt less satisfied after you finished than you had when you started. It didn’t matter how hard you tried or what you did, nothing compared to how good he was at it and how much he cared.

You had gotten used to the fact that you would never be satisfied again. You never should have fucked him the first time. You were fine with the situation that was happening, at least you could make yourself come. Ignorance truly is bliss, you guessed.

Except, there was one night, one fateful night, when you were in bed with Yamaguchi, on all fours as he fucked you from behind, that you actually felt pleasure for the first time in months.

“How is it, sweetheart?” he asked, his breathing sporadic despite only inserting himself into you a few minutes ago. You tried your best to sound into it for his sake at least. The endearing name that came out of his mouth, once belonging to him, but now, even 4 months void of hearing him say it, it was still Kei’s. You wished you’d never told him the name because now it’s all you can think about.

He angles down, accidentally grazing your g-spot, something he has never done in your relationship, ever. It’s not as thoughtful as when Kei does it, nor as harsh, but it sends the smallest amount of pleasure into your core as you inhale deeply. It’s been so long since you’ve felt actual pleasure, that it just slips out of your mouth. It’s the first thing that your body thinks of when you feel even the smallest amount of satisfaction.

“Fuck, Kei.” As soon as it leaves your mouth, you’re hoping that the rest of the room is loud enough to cover it. You want to crawl into a hole and never be seen again. Even with Kei out of your life for 4 months, the second that you feel good, he’s all your brain can think about. Tadashi slows and you know how badly you’ve fucked up.

He stops, still inside of you, as he asks, “What?” You don’t know what to do, what to say, you’re frozen in time. When you don’t reply, he pulls out of you, getting up from off of the bed, repeating himself, but adding your name to try to pull you out of your own head. “(y/n), what?” He doesn’t have to ask what. He doesn’t have to ask you to repeat yourself, he knows exactly what you said.

All of those years of not being suspicious about you and Kei have come back to haunt him all at once. His voice is stern, now, growing impatient. This is a side of him that you’ve never seen. He’s not even angry, just confused and evidently hurt. “(y/n).” His tone is cold and pained.

“I-.” You feel so small as you choke out one word. You want to rewind time, not just to before you moaned Kei’s name, but to back before that night that you admitted your deepest secret to Kei, the night that you weren't able to turn back from. Your hesitance and lack of words are speaking absolute volumes to him as he scoffs at you, putting his clothes back on and pacing around the room. You’re sitting on the edge of the bed, putting your underwear and shirt back on, looking down at your feet to avoid his eyes.

“You what, (y/n), tell me, what?”

“I’m sorry,” is all you can manage to say, a genuine, whether he thinks so or not, apology. It’s genuine, but what exactly are you apologizing for? Even you don’t know.

Tadashi takes a deep breath, turning to you and stopping in his tracks. “Did you really say it? Please, (y/n), tell me that I wasn’t hearing right, that you said something else and my ears deceived me, please.”

You know that if you were to tell him, he would believe you. You wouldn’t even have to explain yourself, he would just understand and he would trust you and you guys would crawl into bed and he would hold you and you would wish it was Kei.

“You said it, didn’t you?” He sounds so defeated, sighing softly and swallowing, tears in his eyes. “Can you at least just tell me that you were just thinking about him for whatever stupid reason? That it was all in your head? That it wasn’t based off of anything that actually happened?” You wish you could. He waits for you to talk, waits nearly 30 minutes in complete, agonizing silence. The awkward air never settling, just getting worse and worse by the second.

“You have to say something, (y/n). I deserve to know.” He doesn’t even sound angry. You want him to sound angry. You want him to scream, to throw things, to slam the door as he leaves, but even after you’ve cheated on him, he’s still just a genuinely kind guy who’s just hurt. He refuses to say another word, sitting in silence for another 10 minutes before you start to speak up.

“I did…” You take a deep breath. “I did say it, by the way.” You admit to the first issue at hand, something that he definitely already knows, so you continue on. “We… Kei and I…” You’re trying to find the right words, but nothing is going to sound right coming out of your mouth. “We slept together.”

Everything is silent. You can’t even hear each other breathing.

“Why?” he asks, bluntly. He deserves to know, but you can’t bring yourself to tell him the actual reason, but he’s repeating it again, “Why?” He repeats it again, begging to know this time, “(y/n), why, please.” He keeps asking because you’re staying silent. The word why is flying around your head so much, fogging your thoughts that it just slips out of your mouth.

“Because you couldn’t make me come,” you admit, louder than you should have. You didn’t want to play the victim here, you weren’t the victim. It was the worst excuse that could have been said. You try to backpedal. “I- I just… You couldn’t… make me come and he could. So we slept together, but only twice before I-.”

Yamaguchi is taking in the entire situation that’s unfolding in front of him. He looks hurt and confused and the anger that you’ve been expecting this whole time is still nowhere to be seen. “That’s a shitty excuse,” he interrupts you.

“I know. I didn’t… I wasn’t trying to excuse myself. I just-.”

“Twice? You slept with him twice?” he asks.

“Yeah, only twic-.”

“ Only twice? Wow, thank you so much for only sleeping with my best friend twice.” He’s getting annoyed at your responses, at himself for sticking around, for being stepped on. You wanted to add that he wasn’t just Yamaguchi’s best friend, he was your best friend too, he was your best friend first, but that didn’t sit well. “What that means, (y/n), is that you did it once and then you did it again because you didn’t feel guilty enough to stop after doing it once.”

You’re quiet again. Nothing that you say is going to fix this. “I’m sorry.”

“That’s where you were a few months ago, isn’t it?” He put the pieces together, connected the dots. “You weren’t out on a walk, you were cheating on me with Kei.” He doesn’t even wait for confirmation. “Was that the first time?”

“Dashi, no, I-.” You don’t want to tell him, you can’t tell him that you fucked on your bed when he wasn’t home, that you didn’t wash the sheets because it reminded you of that night, that you would get nervous, but excited wondering if Tadashi could see the cum stains on your side of the bed.

“Where?”

“Here,” you admit as fast as you can. Tadashi scoffs, grabbing his bag and shoving things into it, muttering as he does so. You sit on the bed quietly, watching him race around the room, but not trying to stop him. “You fucked him here, in our home, in our bed, where we sleep . Fucking unbelievable. This whole time, I knew that something was weird between you two, but I never said anything. I trusted you, (y/n), I trusted you.” He shakes his head, grabbing clothes, electronics, his wallet, anything that he can grab, and shoving it into his bag.

“I can’t fucking believe you. I mean, I thought I couldn’t believe you. I…” He stops himself, taking a deep breath and looking into your eyes. It’s only now that you can see how red they are, tears spilling out of them in heavy drops. Yours are dry.

“I don’t… I’m sorry.” It’s Tadashi that’s apologizing. You reach out, gently placing your hand on his shoulder and rubbing your thumb into it.

“Dashi, don’t apologize.” Part of you thinks that this means he’s going to set his bag down and crawl back into bed with you and be the little spoon until you both fall asleep. Another part of you knows it’s already over.

“I love you,” he says to you, looking into your eyes. You can’t bring yourself to say it back. You stand up, urgently.

“You should stay here. I’m going to go. I can’t… I can’t be in this house. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything.” Even though he has his bag packed already, even though it sounds like he was ready to talk and to give you a second chance, your chest is feeling tight. You had to get out of that room, out of that house. Hearing him tell you that he loves you made you feel sick. It doesn’t sit right in your stomach at all.

“If you leave right now and go to Kei’s, I’m done. We’re done.” It’s the most sturdy sentence that Tadashi had ever said, not riddled with fear or sorrys, just stern.

You don’t even bother to grab a bag like Tadashi did or to say goodbye as you left or to look back at him standing exactly where you left him. You pushed past him and out the door, desperate to get fresh air into your lungs.

Tadashi knows exactly where you’re headed when he notices that you didn’t even grab the car keys from the counter. He doesn’t know what he expected.

The air is much colder than you anticipate it being. The large amounts of it that you’re taking into your lungs to negate the feeling of panic in your heart burn as they fill your chest. Not once during your time in the room with Tadashi did you cry. Watching how upset and sad that you had made him didn’t even make your eyes water, but out on the street, taking that familiar walk that you had taken so often, but not recently, the tears started to form and fall from your eyes.

By the time you make it to his front door, your vision is completely blurred and your lungs hurt so much from heaving that you’re contemplating holding your breath forever. You don’t even know what you’re doing here. You hadn’t called or texted. It was nearly 3 in the morning. You knew that he would be sleeping. You hadn’t talked to him in months. How did you know he would even let you in?

You knock on the door with as much strength as you can muster, 4 light rasps against the wood. You wait for a minute before trying to knock again. When there’s still no answer, you ring the doorbell once. You’re about to give up when you hear the soft click of the unlocking of the door, a tired Kei stands in front of you, his glasses not even on his face as he squints at you. His eyes open wider when he realizes who it is. “(y/n)? What are you doing here?”

It’s cold outside, but you don’t make the move to try to get inside. He hasn’t invited you in yet, and you’ve lost the privilege of slinking past him and taking off your shoes and walking into his room without question when you broke off all contact with him for 4 months.

“He broke up with me.” You sniffle at the end of your sentence. Saying it out loud makes a sob erupt from your chest. Your legs feel weak as you bring your hands up to your face, crying into them, your entire body shaking.

Part of you feels bad for bombarding Kei like this, but you didn’t know where else to go and you definitely couldn’t have stayed. If you had to look at Tadashi for one-second longer, you would have told him everything, even the parts that he definitely doesn’t need to hear. You feel your wrist being pulled inside, Kei shutting the door behind you before continuing to pull you into his bedroom. It looked exactly like it did those few months ago, the bed disheveled from Kei leaving from it so quickly to answer the door. You were laying there with him a few months ago, about to kiss him. You wish you would have kissed him.

Kei pulls you into a hug, wrapping his arms around you so tightly that you can’t move. You feel so secure, so safe. You can’t stop crying, wetting his shoulder from the tears. He rubs your lower back with his palm and your shoulder with his thumb, comforting you. You can feel him hesitate, but ultimately press a kiss into the top of your head. You melt into him.

“It’s not his fault. I cheated on him. I know this, but I just… I should be sadder, Kei,” you say into his shoulder.

“You’re sobbing, what do you mean?”

“I’m not sobbing because I broke up with Tadashi.” You’re treading on thin ice here, but your emotions are completely getting the better of you, pushing you forwards. “I’m sobbing because after he broke up with me, my chest felt lighter. After he broke up with me, the only thing I could think about was you and how I wouldn’t have to hide or lie anymore. He gave me a choice, Kei. He told me that if I left and came to your house that he was going to break up with me, that we were through.” You pause. “And look where I’m at now.”

Tsukishima is silent, his arms around you beginning to fall weakly off of your sides.

“Fuck,” you breath, pulling away from him, sitting on the edge of his bed, and putting your face in your hands. “I was so good at hiding my feelings, Kei, suppressing them so fucking well, and then we spent that night together and- and I couldn’t get you out of my head again.” You grab a fistful of your own hair in frustration. “I mean, fuck.” You pick your head back up, tears slowing, resting your chin in your hands.

He sits next to you but still doesn’t speak. You continue talking, scared of what will happen when the air settles around the conversation. “I was happy. I was content. I-,” you pause, “I didn’t have to sit and wonder if the guy that I’m in love with cared about me in a way that involved more than just sex.” You’ve said all that you could say.

It’s quiet. The atmosphere is calmer than it was back at your house. You steady your breathing, not that it matters, because Kei’s next sentence knocks the wind out of you.

“I wish I would’ve kissed you that night,” he admits to you, his voice low. “I’ve regretted it every day since you left. I thought that maybe, maybe if I would’ve kissed you, you would’ve stayed or- or you would’ve just known.”

“Known?” you ask, innocently.

He exhales sharply, almost resembling a laugh. “Known that I was fucking in love with you.”

The tears that had started to subside came back with everything they had, your whole body wracked, shoulders heaving as he said those words. Even though he was sitting right next to you, he felt miles away. All you wanted was for him to wrap around you. You wanted to crawl into his lap, to feel his fingertips on your scalp again, to feel him give you any contact at all.

You’ve thought about that night endlessly, spent hours awake remembering how he looked underneath you. Even after the thoughts of your incredible sex subsided, after they faded into the back of your mind, after you pushed them back there, you couldn’t get the look in his eyes out of your head. You kept watching them, replaying in your head, as they flickered to your lips and lingered, how they didn’t look hungry, but yearning.

You don’t know how to reply, but you need to speak. You need to tell him something, anything, to remind him why you’re here in the first place, why you chose him overworking it out with Tadashi, anything to get him to move closer to you and hold you.

Or maybe you don’t need to speak. Maybe you don’t need to say anything to get him to move closer and hold you. He had just done the hard part. He told you that he was in love with you, or, that he was in love with you. Was he still?

You looked up at him, saw his head hanging like he’d made a mistake, his gaze stuck on the floor while he fiddled with his thumbs. You turn to him, nudging underneath his arm and crawling into his lap, exactly where you wanted to be. You sit in his lap, curled up in a small ball, tears still overflowing from your eyes.

He doesn’t move for a minute, worry creeping up on you as he doesn’t react to you being in his lap, but then he wraps his arms around you and rests his chin on the top of your head. Your ear is pressed against his chest and you can hear the dull thumping of his heart. You time your breathing with it, your tears slowing as they synchronize.

You’re aware of how little has been said since he confessed to you. You want to tell him something that will make him feel more at ease for having said it. “I wanted to kiss you too, that night. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it.” It’s quiet again, but you know that he hears you. He tightens his grip in response, nuzzling his nose into your neck as he rests his forehead against your cheek.

Kei turns you slightly so that you’re facing him, legs wrapped around his waist as he holds you up with strong arms behind your back. You’re staring into his eyes again like you were four months ago, but you’re not riddled with conflicting thoughts, you’ve never been more sure of anything in your life.

Before you even start inching closer to him, Kei’s facial expression changes just slightly. “Can I ask?” He pauses, waiting for you to give confirmation for him to go on. When you do, he continues, “What finally did it? Why did you guys finally break up?”

You had told him that you guys had broken up, had come over his house at 3 in the morning sobbing, had told him that you chose him over Tadashi, but nowhere in your mind did you think that you’d have to tell him why exactly you broke up. You flush red recalling the events. It was somehow more embarrassing recalling them, about to say them aloud, than to actually have gone through them. “I- Well, I mean-,” you stutter over your words causing him to look confused.

“You don’t have to tell me, for whatever reason, I know that we haven’t ta-,” he starts, but you interrupt him, shaking your head.

“No, no. I want to tell you, Kei, but you… you can’t laugh.” Your eyes are pleading.

“Tch, well when you say that, you know I can’t promise such things.” You’ve missed his little tongue clicks.

You take a deep breath. “He was fucking me.” You take another deep breath, avidly avoiding Kei’s eyes and evidently piquing his interest. “And he hit that spot.” Your cheeks are burning as you take another breath to steady yourself. “And I said your name.”

His jaw drops, head tilting to the side as he tries to conceal his cockiness, his disbelief, his bliss. You bury your face into his chest, the warmth of your cheeks worsening by the second. “You said my name while he was fucking you?”

“Kei, you don’t understand,” your voice is muffled by his shirt, “I hadn’t gotten off in so long, hadn’t felt like actual pleasure since that night, and so, and- and he-.” You’re stumbling over your words, but he doesn’t say anything. “He hit it on accident and I just couldn’t help it. It was slipping out of my mouth and I’ve never wanted to hide more.”

He leans back, pulling his chest away from your face as you look up at him. His head is tilted back and he’s laughing at the whole situation. “I told you that I couldn’t promise anything. Wow. He hit it by accident?”

You nod at his question. Nothing about this situation is funny, but seeing Kei laugh makes you start laughing. You want to feel worse about it, but it’s just the two of you in this secluded room and being with Kei for the first time in months, you feel truly happy again. You push him slightly, the corner of your mouth tugging upwards as you bury your face into his chest again. “Don’t be mean to me.”

Kei brings his hand under your chin, lifting your head until your gaze meets his. No matter how hard you try to avert it, he moves you to match it. He rubs small circles into your chin. It sends shivers through every part of your body. “I’m sorry. I’m not being mean. I’m flattered, really.” You melt into him, letting your chin form into his hand before looking at his lips so obviously that if he didn’t get the hint, you’d start crying again.

He knows, of course, he knows, but he asks anyway. “Can I kiss you?” His voice is soft but audible.

You nod gently, making sure not to disturb his hand on your chin, “Please.” He brings your face to his, carrying it with his fingertips before meeting it halfway. When his lips first touch yours, the first thing you notice is how different they taste from before. Without the sex driving the kiss, it felt less desperate, less like it needs to happen and more like it is just supposed to happen. Your eyes flutter shut, your body threatening to start shaking if you don’t deepen the kiss. You need more of him.

You place your hands on the sides of his face, pulling him closer, your face squished against his as much as it could be. This kiss was completely different in every aspect. You were no longer with Tadashi, this wasn’t just a meeting for a hookup. This was your best friend, who ( is? was? ) in love with you. The two words switch back and forth in your mind, asking if he is still in love with you.

You pull away, much to your own dismay. His lips almost start to pout when you’ve pulled away until he sees how serious you are. You have to ask. You have to know. “Are you…” You pause, rewording the question, “You said that..” You take a breath. “That you were in love with me.” He turns red as he nods. “Is that… like, you were, but aren’t anymore? Or like you were and still are?”

He blinks at you slowly, the red fading off of his face as a smile replaces his nervousness. He laughs, shaking his head and putting his lips back on yours. “I don’t think I could ever not be.” You not only hear the words but feel them against your lips. Your hands are back on his face, desperate to kiss him so hard that you can’t breathe.

You roll off of his lap, your hands still on the sides of his face guiding you with him, pulling him on top of you. The kiss is still innocent enough, despite the position you find yourself in. He’s hovering over you, his hips directly above yours. You snake your legs around his waist, pulling him even closer into you. You open your mouth slightly, letting your tongue slip out and swipe against his lip, hoping with everything in you that he lets you in.

You can tell how surprised he is to feel your tongue, but he lets you enter. Without the smashing of your teeth, the fighting of your tongues, you explore his mouth, running your tongue over his and the back of his teeth. You moan into his mouth as he places a hand on your hip, rolling up against him softly. You can feel him growing hard at the contact. He grunts as he rolls down against you in response.

You move your mouth from his, kissing down his neck and sucking at the base. You were surprised at how much he reacted to this. All this time, he had abused and riddled your neck with marks and bruises, but he wanted them just as much. You bite into his soft skin, sucking on an area gently, running your tongue over it lightly, using your bottom lip to rub the spot as well. You pull at the hem of his shirt, pulling it over his head and throwing it to the side. You run your hands down his chest, down his toned stomach, just feeling his skin as you nibble on his collarbones. Kei is moaning into your ear at the feeling.

Your hands move down to his boxers, only the thin fabric separating his growing length and your hand. You palm him as you kiss his neck again. His breath stutters in your ear as he thrusts into your hand. You begin to start taking them off when he pulls away suddenly. You look up at him, confused and worried. “Kei?”

“(y/n),” he breathes, “I- I want this so badly. I want you so badly, but you literally just got out of a relationship an hour ago. I don’t want to take advantage of you or have you do something you’ll regret tomorrow.”

You shake your head, your eyebrows furrowed. “Please, Kei, I’ve waited so long to do this right. I know this isn’t ideal. I know what happened. I get it. I know, but… please. I want this,” you say, looking directly into his eyes. “I could never regret spending a night with you. I never have and I never will.”

He mulls over the situation, thinking carefully before confirming again, “Are you sure?”

You nod again. “Yes, yes, Kei. I’ve missed you so much in every way possible.”

He caresses your cheek with his hand, rubbing his thumb over your jawline. “Is this just a hookup?” The question stops everything in you. You pull his face back down to yours, kissing everywhere but his mouth as you repeat the word no over and over again.

“No, god, fuck, Kei, no. No. I want you so badly, but not just because you can make me come so fucking good, but because I want to be that close to you again. I want to feel you inside of me and I want you to hold me after.” You don’t know if the words you’re saying are too sappy, but they’re true and they work. Kei kisses you this time, pressing his lips against you hard, but not rough.

“How have you survived these past months without me?” he asks. You giggle at the question, but then exhale, almost defeated.

“Barely, honestly,” you admit. “I’ve come twice by myself and they were the worst orgasms I’ve ever had.”

“We’ll have to fix that, then, yeah, baby?” For some reason, the pet name makes you feel warm. He had called you it before, but it felt different now like he meant it more. The thought of him calling you baby outside of sex just added to the fire. You nod at him, resuming your kiss. As you’re building up the moment again, Kei pulls your shirt off, releasing your tits from your shirt and massaging them as he devours your tongue.

You roll your hips against him again, feeling him almost completely hard already. You needed to feel his skin. You grabbed the waistband, gently tugging it down as far as you could from your position underneath him. You took his cock into your hand, stroking the rock hard length until you could feel even more blood rushing to it. Everything that you’re doing to him is getting a much bigger reaction than before, but you love it. You pull away from his mouth just long enough to spit into your hand, slicking his cock with the saliva, your fist gliding over it much easier now.

Kei isn’t speaking, which is unusual, but you’re looking up at his face in the times when your lips are apart and you’re looking at the concentration on his face. It makes your heart flutter. “Pants off,” he says, but it’s not demanding. The short phrase is just desperate . You move your hand from his cock to undo your own pants, sliding them off with your underwear. You wrap your fist back around his cock, but not before dipping your fingers into yourself, moaning softly at the contact. You use how wet you are to lubricate his cock, your fist moving faster now. When he sees you do so, hears how wet you are when you push your fingers inside of you, feels the wetness on his cock, he twitches, pulling your hand away and pinning it down on the bed.

You look up at him, somewhat confused. He looks almost embarrassed. You pull him into another kiss, wrapping your legs around him, his cock brushing only slightly against your lips as he groans into your ear. He holds your hips in place, pushing you back onto the beg, unwrapping your legs from him. He owes you some sort of explanation, but he wasn’t going to give it to you without keeping you occupied.

He reaches down, still towering over top of you, bracing himself with one hand. “I haven’t come since the last time we were together,” he explains, avoiding eye contact with you. “You ruined me too, I guess.” The words shake your entire being. You blink at him, eyes open without knowing what to say.

Your mind is distracted as he rubs two fingers between your lips, curling them around your pussy, pressing into your hole ever so slightly. You want to grab his wrist and shove his fingers inside of you. You think if he did that, you might come on the spot. You missed his fingers so much, missed any part of him being inside you so much. He uses his thumb to rub your swollen clit, the small circles making your heart race. Seeing you underneath him, squirming and wriggling from the small movements, a cocky smile spreads over his face. He missed seeing you like this.

All at once, he shoves his fingers in, your pussy completely swallowing them up to the knuckle, slamming into your g-spot with such purpose. You clench around his fingers. “Kei, fuck, again, please, just once more, again.” You can’t believe how pathetic you sound right now, asking him to do it once more, knowing it’ll push you over the edge with how little you’ve been pleased lately, with how dissatisfying your sex life had been.

He listens to you, pulling his fingers nearly all the way out, and then slamming them back into you, pushing as hard as he can to get as deep as he can. His thumb hasn’t stopped messily flicking over your clit as he does so. You’re rolling your hips on his fingers as you come for the first time in months. These little movements shouldn’t have made you come so fast, but you couldn’t help it. His eyes are wide as he notices that you’ve already come. He rides you through your orgasm, pumping his fingers in and out of you quickly. When you’re finishing coming, he doesn’t stop, so fascinated by how quickly you’re getting there. Your pussy feels so sensitive already, but you can feel another wave of pleasure about to wash over you and you welcome it. He curls his fingers up, hitting your spot repeatedly with his long, slender fingers. He’s watching you the whole time, gaze strong as he slams his fingers in and out of you, inserting another finger right before you come. His fingers don’t make you feel nearly as full as his cock, but it’s a start.

The pleasure from his fingers inside of you and his thumb on your sensitive clit are too much. The pressure building in your lower stomach releases all at once, spraying the bed beneath you as you scream out his name in repetition. He pulls his fingers out of you, using his entire hand to rub against your clit faster than anyone ever has as you finish coming. You’re sweating from how hard your body is clenching, your hands making fists into the sheet as tears blink from your eyes.

You’re feeling even more sensitive, but Kei puts his fingers back inside of you. “Kei, Kei, I can’t, I can’t come again, fuck.”

“You remember the rules, yeah?” he asks, making sure that you don’t actually want him to stop. You nod at him excessively, holding his wrist in place and rocking your hips on his fingers when he slows down to check. He smiles at you, continuing to finger you. You can see his arm start to shake. He hadn’t slowed down once since he started hammering his fingers into you and you’re so grateful for it. The continuous, never letting up, pleasure that he’s created makes your orgasm come even quicker than you think it’s going to.

Just as you’re about to come for the third time, he removes his fingers and slips into you, grunting as he does so. You feel every inch fill you as he pushes into your tight hole, stretching even further for him as he hits the back of your walls. You gasp for air as you feel his complete length inside of you, rubbing against your walls. His hand is gone from your clit, but he’s penetrating you deeply. You come around him, gripping onto his cock like a fucking vice as you cry out. He thrusts into you and pulls out, looking obviously labored from how tight you’re clenching around him. He’s muttering a string of fuck s as he does so.

“Kei, fuck, thank you, thank you, fuck,” you mutter into his shoulder, running your fingernails down his back, wanting him closer, deeper.

“You’re so tight, baby, fuck. You’re so tight and you’re all mine,” he says. There’s no mention of Tadashi, no nicknames that remind you of him, only saying things that are just the two of yours. After you’ve come, he slows his hips, fucking into you slowly, but hard, never breaking eye contact with you.

His hand is in your hair, using it to pull you on to him slowly. A small part of you was convinced that the only reason that you and Kei’s sex was so incredible was because it was rough and degrading and hot and though it can be all those things, it doesn’t always have to be. You’re realizing very quickly that you don’t need Kei to fuck you really rough for you to enjoy it, for both of you to revel in it.

His slow thrusts don’t last very long as his breathing starts getting quicker. His hips pick up speed again, pushing so deeply into you that he can feel every part of your pussy wrapped around him. His thrusts are getting messier, stuttering instead of keeping the perfect rhythm that he normally does. His arm is shaking to hold himself up.

“Fuck, (y/n), fuck, baby, fuck, I’m going to come. Fuck, fuck, will you come with me, baby? Will you come on my cock while I fill you? I need to feel you clenching around me, milking the cum that’s already coming out of my cock, coaxing more and more out until you can taste it, please, baby, fuck.” All of the dirty talk that he held back from during comes out in this moment. His words bring you right to the edge. Feeling his cock ache inside you, looking into his eyes as you nod helplessly letting the orgasm echo through your entire body. You can feel it in every part of you as you squeeze around him, doing exactly what he asked of you.

He didn’t demand anything of you, only asked nicely, even throwing in a please. Even still, you wanted to do whatever he asked of you, especially if that thing was coming on his cock as he came inside of you. His cock is throbbing, pulsing with every slam into you, with every stream of cum that comes out of his cock as he fucks it into you. Your moans are straggled as you try to speak, to thank him for everything, to just say his name. He’s moaning into your ear, a murmur of dirty words and your name repeated over and over again. It’s mostly gibberish, except a “thank you” that slips out among the rest. You feel flush all over as he sloppily fucks into you for the last time. You feel the cum drip out of you as soon as he pulls out.

Despite how tired you feel, you know that you have to go clean yourself up so that you can actually sleep. You just assumed you would stay the night, but maybe that’s not what he’s expecting. You make your way to the bathroom, waving him off when he tells you to stay and that you can fix it tomorrow. You hear him in the other room, changing his sheets on the bed and getting dressed again.

When you enter into his room again, having brushed your teeth with the toothbrush he still kept in his medicine cabinet, you see him pulling one of his old volleyball shirts out of his drawer, tossing it to you as you walked in the room. “For tonight. Figured it’d be better to sleep in than what you had on.” You smile, a warmth spreading from your chest to the tips of your fingers and toes.

“Thank you, Kei,” you put the shirt on, taking in how soft it is and how much it smells like him.

He climbs into the middle of the bed, keeping the covers thrown to the side for you to get into bed with him. He pats the bed beside him when you seem hesitant. You slowly make your way over, getting into bed. He throws the covers over top of you before turning onto his side, looking at you with sleepy, but happy eyes.

“What?” you ask, the attention making you blush even harder. He shakes his head, not saying anything, so you ask again, “What?”

“Nothing,” he waves you off, pressing a kiss into the side of your head and flipping you so that your back is flush against his chest, snaking his arms around your waist.

“Tsukishima Kei,” you flip back around, staring him in the eyes, “What?”

He laughs at how serious you are, moving a piece of hair out of your eyes and kissing your forehead. “I just think you’re pretty, that’s all.” Your eyes widen in surprise as you flip back over, pushing yourself back into him, hiding what a dark crimson your skin had turned. He laughs again at your reaction, his hand resting on your hip and massaging it as he kisses the back of your neck.

He wraps his legs in yours, pulling you closer to him. You can feel his breath on your ear but you don’t mind. It’s silent for a moment, but despite how tired you are and how dark the room is, you can’t seem to sleep. Your eyelids feel heavy, but there are words that need to be said that haven’t been. “Kei?” you ask quietly, seeing if he’s still up. He hums into your back evidently awake from the response time but getting sleepier by the second. You place your hand on his, squeezing it gently as you turn back around to face him.

His eyes are shut, lashes fluttering softly at your movement before opening the tiniest bit. Your face is so close to his that it’s killing you not to kiss him right now, but you need to say it first. He needs to hear it first.

“I love you, Kei.”

His eyes open wider now, he inhales slightly sharper than before, but a smile rests on his face. He leans forward, pressing his lips against yours for a moment before pulling away, a pout instantly forming on your face. “Hey,” you voice your concern, but he just raises his eyebrows.

“Fine, fine, I won’t tell you that I love you too or that I’m so glad that everything happened the way it did despite how messy it was or that I want to fall asleep with you every night,” he says, shrugging, but pressing his lips back into yours again. He’s so good at everything he does. You want to keep kissing him, but more so, you want him to continue to tell you nice things.

He spends the rest of the time that you’re awake telling you all of the things he’s never told you. You exchange secrets, you laugh, you kiss, you cry a little bit, you kiss some more, you kiss even more. Eventually, the sun peeks out from the horizon casting a bright, but soft pink, glow into Kei’s room. You press your face into his chest, hiding your eyes from the light at first, but then finding so much comfort in the contact, in the heartbeat. It calms you into a sleep. He massages his fingers into your scalp, petting and smoothing your hair.

This entire time, everything you wanted was right there in front of you, but now you had it.

“Goodnight, baby,” he says softly into your head, “I love you.”

Your heart beams.

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