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minquiec · 6 months

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Some lore stuffs + how her story ends

This is kinda all over the place bc I don't have a coherent idea but I just need to write it all down before I forget

How Jia was bit was on a hot ass day and she basically fell asleep on a spider and gained powers unknowingly

Doesn't find out for maybe a week

Has a weird dream one night where she basically meets a deity in her dream and the exchange was literally like

"You, Jialin Chen, now bear the powers to protect this la-"

"Uhm yea no thanks, pass 😬"

"WHAT?"

And then a comedic exchange occurs between mortal and god haha! Until the deity was like ENOUGH this is your DESTINY you will bear it whether you like it or NOT 👹 so Jia's kinda like alright fine damn 🙄 but obviously we all know how she really feels abt the whole situation (she hates it bc of issues) but anyways

The reason why it took a whole week is cause uhmmm plot hole lelel or smth the deity can't actually interfere directly with the world

EITHER WAY this is basically spoilers for endgame but it's not like I'll ever make a coherent plot bc I'm too lazy and dum but basically

The deity of Jia's universe is border on obsessive with creating a story line and destiny and heroes and stuff like that and ofc it has to be perfect (bc ofc it has to be, totally not cliche or anything)

Anyways this obsession makes them interfere TOO much with Jia's universe because if the deity was never this obsessed

Jia probably would've gotten over her issues (bc she's meets someone to help her copeeee 😋😋 cougjocughcgpuccough)

But bc the deity is an unreasonable shithead, they're literally the root of every problem:

They're responsible for Jia's split soul because of how abrupt her duties were suddenly forced on her

Bc of the split soul problem, it nearly upsets the world balance that could've been very bad for the universe! (the day she had lost the plot and had a existential crisis breakdown I think I posted it here but basically on that day she was flickering between both before Lin took control)

-> the logic is rlly,,, idk nonsensical for this bc what I thought as world making is that you can't have two souls in control at once and it goes again natural laws so it nearly ficked up her world cause it AINT SUPOSE TO HAPPEN ITS NEVA SUPOSE TO HAPPENNN but moving on

So then Lin switches in place of Jia and the world balance is briefly restored YAYY 🎉 everything is fine‼️

❌ WRONG ❌

Cause now Lin went and 'broke up' (idk it wasn't rlly a break up bc she never said 'lets break up' but she kinda did go 'we aren't meant for each other 🖕' and dipped) with hb so NOW HES GOING THRU IT and the rest of her friends back at spider society are like ???? What the??? Fuck???

Lin does manage to spend a few days or more at the hq cause technically she is still Jia but just

Different

But everyone's kinda weirded out cause she's Serious™ now and even Miguel's kinda like wattafack 🧍 plus the fact she has long white hair that spawned out of nowhere so they kinda piece some form of logic together that she's a different Jia

Anyways some time passes and one day an especially big anomaly is warned abt in Jia's (still Lin) universe which is bizarre cause they're not usually this big but it's all because of that STOOPID FUKASS deity GOING AROUND FUKIN THINGS UP and somehow created this ridiculously bad threat as a 'enemy' for the 'hero of their story' to defeat

The biggest problem with the anomaly is that while it doesn't really like, belong in Jia's universe, it doesn't belong in any OTHER universe either BECAUSE THAT DEITY BOUGHT IT UP OUTTA NOWHERE BC THEYRE PSYCHO I need to stop hating on characters that I literally made anyways

So HQ can't exactly deal with it like they usually do but they can try to offer assistance at least

Obviously for obvious (cliche) reasons CERTAIN PEOPLE are gonna be there cause yknow they still care abt Jia even tho she's changed (to Lin momentarily)

Battle occurs blah blah I'm not good with action scenes and things are looking a littttlee bleak for Lin and Co and all the sudden Lin receives a bad injury that nearly knocks her unconscious but thru her ringing ears and muted background noise she hears SOMEBODDYYY CALLING HER NAAMMEEE (god I really wonder who)

Because her state of unclarity from the Blunt Force Head Trauma makes things a little weird, the fine line between Jia and Lin also becomes a little muddled and the Jia that's been hiding behind Lin can hear his voice and it quite literally brings her out of that dark room in her mind to control again so TLDR Jia is back again instead of Lin

Reunion happens for maybe 3 minutes tops before shit hits the fan again and suddenly the deity has teared through time space fabric out of anger to speak directly to them mortal little earthlings on the ground because they're a little bitch

All because they thought Lin was the true protagonist they've been searching for all along and now 'that insolent fool' (hobie) has ruined everything (he does no wrong)'

But suddenly because the deity is in direct contact with the mortal world, they're like wait 🤨 you're not from this universe and sees other things also not from this universe and goes on a tangent about how they don't need to rebuild a 'story' anymore and can just find another 'story' to pilot (TLDR AGAIN: local deity discovers universe theft and wants to ditch this universe cause Jia's spiderman story wasn't perfect and now wants to find another universe to force to become their 'perfect story')

Obviously spider people are like 😨😨😨 UHMMM NO TF UR NOTTT so they start retreating (as they should tbh) and Jia's like helping to round up people to gtfo of her universe before some batshit deity absorbs them or smth

Atp bits of her universe is already crumbling and disintegrating because the deity is already trashing it because it's worthless and imperfect now (ngl me when art 😭😭)

So now it's the last of the people to go back thru the portals and its Jia and Hb :)) (y'all should know what's coming next)

Truthfully, Jia wants to so so badly go thru the portal to stay with the rest of them but she knows that there was the possibility of her connection with the deity of her world and her as a creation from the said deity

So she says goodbyes

Pushes him thru

And throws in her watch before it closes properly so the FUCK ASS DEITY CANT GET ANY KIND OF CONNECTION TO THE MULTIVERSE

And thus it concludes her coming of age plot because she found the proper courage to do what was right in all senses and came to terms with her spider girl identity

Even though she had so much she wanted to do with the rest of them was what she had thought while the thread of her universe on the multiverse crumbled into nothingness

ANYWAYS THE REAL CONCLUSION IS THE DEITY IS THE REAL ANOMALY THEIR OBSESSION DROVE THEM INTO AN ANOMALY AND INTERFERING WITH THE LIVING WORLD but thats kinda what happens when you've been living for centuries, you kinda go a little nuts

Anyways thanks for this long and incredibly messy read, don't kill me ✌️ peaces

#jipunk #lorerambles

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cripple-council · 3 months

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6h late to the rant but OH GOD this is gonna be a nightmare of a semester from gym class alone

yesterday (monday) I was tryna participate in gym class cuz despite being disabled I typically don't mind most gym activities, but heres a thing with whatever specific chronic pain I have: I won't realize I pushed my physical breaking point until it's way too late. Like I'll be chilling and then suddenly the worst migrane will hit, followed by my entire body simotaniously wanting to spasm and being unable to move due to the intense pain. To the point that when I asked the gym teacher to sit out (which he let me do no problem cuz he knew my issues) I could barely walk to the outside of the gym (where my friends were cuz one was recovering from a panic attack) and once I got out there I was basically unable to move due to a mix of having to stand still as for my body to not completely go haywire and because more movement = more pain. At some point both me & the friend who was sitting out cuz panic attack both ended up laying on the floor cuz they were lightheaded and my body was about to either go haywire or tense up enough to where I couldn't move so I wanted to atleast be on the ground just incase, and while the friend who was lightheaded got actual help from the 2 other friends sitting out for no reason I was just given a bunch of shitty jokes and sarcastic "are you okay?"s and after admitting that I genuinely wasn't okay (as if me going on about the fact that my body was doing everything wrong at once wasn't a major hint that HEY I WASN'T FINE.) the only one who rlly stepped up to help me was the friend I was the closest too and she helped me sit up and attempted to get a tylenol from the office for me (couldn't because I had to be there to get it. bad thing to say when the "I" in question is currently unable to walk but that secretary just seems to want me dead for being crippled anyways) while the other 2 friends were too busy making jokes abt how they wanted to fuck eachother to even glance over at me. Fastforward a bit and gym ends, gym teacher helps me stand up, friend who had to sit out cuz of a panic attack talks to gym teacher abt stuff I didn't care to eavesdrop on and I barely manage to get in and out of that changing room. my body still feels like its pain-burning (like. its almost like a burning feeling but without the heat and just the pain) today and I'm debating just missing school today cuz of this. fuck my dumbass body's inability to know when to stop until its too late and fuck Kat & Quade who couldn't get their eyes off eachother for a second to try and give a shit about another human being

honestly can’t really imagine what it’s like to have ablebodied friends as a physically disabled person, well i have one but they’re incredibly helpful, and it must be so disappointing to have your ‘friends’ ignore you like that. i’m truly sorry that you had to experience that & you deserve so much better.

you truly think that your friends will be there, and when they’re not, it’s really hard to grasp honestly. like, do you not care?? (you as in the friends).

i’ve had many one sided friendships where i’ve had to do all the work, while getting nothing in return myself. it truly feels like a betrayal.

i’m incredibly happy to be surrounded by physically disabled friends, because in a special way, i can ALWAYS rely on them. there are days where their issues are worse than mine, or they are hindered by their physical disability so they can’t help with something; but they will always think about how they can help in case they can’t help in a specific way. it’s just a completely other experience than with able bodied ppl.

i truly hope you’ll get surrounded by more physically disabled people in your life, it’s a game changer.

much love to you, and i with a low pain/symptoms day for you! (and otherwise, the ability to manage the pain/symptoms)💚

#ask

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desudog · 3 months

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wait you HATED sweet pool omg. its my least fave out of the n+c releases ive read so far mainly for how flat the characters felt to me and how clumsy a lot of the plot felt but i rlly loved the aesthetic/general vibe it had so thats rlly interesting to me,if ur up for it id love to know what didnt click for u ^_^

when i judge how bad a VN is with my brother (avid VN reader as well) we use Sweet Pool as a basically "zero" on the scale of professional, large VNs.

Sweet Pool's writing was WEIRD. I can do some weird, thats fine. Weird ass-birth stillborn meatslugs? ... okay, ill... look past that. ok i wont lie, the constant ass-birth was hard for me. i really did try to not judge it on that but like, there was almost constant buttbirth going on. ive made peace with this by now, kinda making a link to myself about the connections of it to being an unintentional trans narrative in many ways and all but like. it was WEIRD. and kinda hard to read. it didnt strike me as horror, it struck me as "weird fetish i have to sit through. oh my god is he licking tha- PUT IT DOWN Z-DAWG. Ok christ."

The characters were also weird. I laughed out loud in surprise at how stupid the "i saved you from being raped <3 SO I CAN RAPE YOU, PSYCH!" scene was. like wtf was that??????

(I hope you werent planning on USING that butthole, mister!)

i did not enjoy the art style, i think its the ugliest N+C art style yet and since. not my thing. many angles and proportions look weird. the CGs looked stiff and uninspired. it NEVER grew on me. no shade to people who liked it or the artist it just.. wasnt my thing. not unbearable but just. not. as good as it could have been and def took away from the experience.

i didnt like any of the endings. it wasnt scary it was weird. the pacing was weird. for being a BL, it had very little love just... wtf. and im so sad abt what they did to mikoto bc i liked him before uuuUuUuUu yandere plot twwwwist. bleh.... dollar store keisuke! they would FORCE the true end so you maybe go, "maybe the true end is satisfying and good an-" no. its not. fuck yoU!

sweet pool was painful. i dont know how else to put my experience. i 100%d it because i 100% everything when i can, and i was literally pushing through like a hiker in a snow storm to finish it. every 3 seconds was secondhand embarrassment. the "jerking off in the classroom" scene comes to mind. i got up and took a break for that one because it was just unbearable. idk how anyone could slap one out to this vn. im not sure if anyone ever has. which makes the sex weird. actually, i dont think there was a single consensual ero scene unless u count the true end fusion scene.

(proof god does not love us)

the aesthetic/vibe was... ehhh... not super unique IMO. school setting immediately put me off, a more gritty and cool toned, dark palate made things interesting but, its still a "weird thing happens in high school" story. kinda bored to death of HS settings in VNs.

i did like the protag tho! he was interesting and it was nice having a chronically ill protag even if it was just a plot device to make him be able to miss school while going on a... dark apartment birth marathon.

sweet pool felt like a bizarre, amateur fanfiction for a fetish i dont have.

the soundtrack is very memorable as well as the opening pre-game sequence, i liked the concept of the choice button meanings, but they were very rough in actual use.

this is my favorite CG i appreciate the aquarium set up instead of a fish bowl (though he could do better...)

(shame about them turning into meat popcorn tho...)

i liked the iguana lol

i didnt care about these guys so much i dont even remember their names most of the time. except zenya. i liked him cus hes so cute and batshit crazy and has intersex swag.

(does this shade match my festering flesheye?)

all in all?

i give sweet pool a 2/10 butt babies.

--------- CONS:

no shortage of buttbirth stuff

seems to have lost the "love" in "BL".

some characters arent even original... FROM THEIR OWN STUDIO.

boring, hard to follow story

character focus on a character who has no personality. this guy is the gijinka of the hair that gathers at the drain of your shower.

designs that just are not very memorable or unique, without the personality to work with

story has routes but none of them were thought much of, should have just been a kinetic

confusing choice buttons

WAY too many choices for a VN with 3 candidates. makes 100%ing a drag.

predictable story

----------

PROS:

no shortage of buttbirth stuff, i mean, if youre into that

a soundtrack that makes up for the lack of good ero because this OST FUCKS

still a better love story than twilight

-----------

note: i read it in offical ENG, so i was no doubt getting a lower quality version. i dont think the original text would have helped getting it more than a single grade higher.

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bauhausluvr · 7 months

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a lot happened today, good and bad, and im still processing it. but i'll try to retell it all below. warning: this will be long and graphic

major tw for self-harm

so i had class with M and everything was fine, I even got to talk with her a few times which i was really happy about. but later when we were doing our own thing, she got really fascinated with this one student which made me want to cry because i was jealous she was so intrigued and spent so much time with them. this student is also so much cooler than me so i understand why. i got super upset at myself for feeling this way, so with very little thought i left the room to go to the bathrooms and consequently slash my arm up

i had new blades and i was in such a state where i wasn't thinking so i wasn't careful with how i cut, i just wanted to do some damage, and i ended up bleeding much more than i usually would. once i saw how much blood there was on me and on the floor, i realised i had to stop the bleeding and used a bunch of paper towels to make it stop. eventually, unluckily for me, i ran out and spent a long time just rinsing my arm under the water (which in hindsight definitely prolonged the bleeding), but i couldn't go to the next stall for paper since there were people outside and it seemed to keep being taken.

had i not gone in the stall with barely any paper left i probably would've avoided this, but this led to me having to ask the people outside for paper and since i was kind of panicked i was saying i had a medical emergency, so this led to them getting a teacher down to check on me and basically the whole process of first aid coming down to bandage my arm n setting a welfare meeting for another day since this was at the end of the day.

what i didn't expect however was M to come down as well. i felt super embarrassed and ashamed once i saw her face, i didn't know how to react. but once she heard I was harming myself she came in to comfort me, even calling me her 'baby' when coming down and hugging me. i hugged her back tightly and sobbed into her shoulder, it was so comforting.. she has such a motherly charm its crazy. she soon revealed she also used to self-harm, even at work, which made me feel so much more at ease since i felt extremely bad about myself as i feel like i should've grown out of these feelings by now, but i clearly hadn't.

after all the paperwork and talk was done, i went back to her class to get my stuff back and found she edited my work and added her own little charm to it while i was gone (we were just playing around with an editing program) 😭. since everyone was gone by then i asked to talk w her alone and ppl kept coming in the class, so M grabbed my wrist gently and led me out somewhere where only us two can talk

i basically thanked her for her hug and all her kind words, and was sorry that she had to witness me at such a state. following this we talked for a little bit about her own struggles with self-harm and having to be sectioned, and about her thoughts on me which, i wish i could remember all the details, but i was so messed up i only remember it partly. regardless, it was lovely to hear and definitely what i needed at the time.

one of the best parts of this whole aftermath conversation was when i not-so-jokingly said i have mommy issues and she laughed saying "I KNOW" 😭😭😭. i was rlly taken aback by that so i stuttered and asked what made her come to that conclusion, and she basically just talked about stuff like my conservative mother and catholic upbringing which i brought up to her. she later said that she had her own struggles w her daughter and how she kinda sees that in me, to which i hesitantly said "i kinda wish you were my mum" and SHE SAID "me too right now" ?!!??"! IDK HOW I DIDN'T IMPLODE RIGHT THEN..

during this whole conversation we hugged so many more times and it was kinda awkward at one point cuz her lanyard got stuck on my cardigan LMFAO but it was so healing and awesome to talk w her about all this, even if i wish she didn't have to witness any of it. there's so much more i could say but if i gave all the details then this post would be 10x longer. obviously i didn't mention why i cut in the first place, and i'm contemplating even doing so to anyone cuz i don't want her taken away from me.

with all that said despite all the horrible stuff, something good came out of it and i'm grateful for that, although i worry it deepened my attachment to M even further....which honestly was inevitable at this point anyway.

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rianafying · 3 months

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this is not necessarily a happy journal entry but

i’ve had a lot of happy moments lately. and relief. also chaos but that’s nothing unusual, the happiness is. noticed something that made me upset just now. also opened bumble god knows why. i know fully well i don’t want to date, and yet, i opened bumble. it’s not like i have time to kill. in fact, i have no time. there’s so much stuff i’m meant to be doing. i just added a whole bunch of stuff to my master to do list. here comes the hyperventilation. i prayed the other day. i felt so bad that i prayed. can yall imagine how much anxiety it takes to get to a point where i genuinely broke down enough to beg god for help? but it means something. it means i have hope. it means i want things to get better. it means i feel it’s worth it. this is a start contrast to my indifference and disinterest in living last year. things are different now. i am different. nothing changes. everything changes. it feels like a cycle but also there’s something new about it. everytime i regain my will to life. you can’t force these things. it has a mind of its own. also going back to bumble, it’s such a waste of time for me and also it makes me feel a few things: 1) like dating is so strange, i don’t have it in me to do the whole ritual, it’s not organic, it feels forced, and superficial, it’s not for me, not for who i am right now. 2) it makes me think about aspects of myself that i have struggled a lot to make peace with, such as my appearance, my personality etc through the lens of others, like why would i ever subject myself to such torment, when i know i hate being perceived 3) i am too impatient and disinterested to send the first message or to wait for a response and then to carry on a conversation. there’s more points but ill just keep rambling for eternity. why am i even saying all this, why am i thinking so much about it, clearly this has struck something in me, since i feel so strongly about it and am desperately trying to make sense of it. the thing is. i like who i am. i like how things are going. that is not something i can say like ever. but can now. and i’m doing fine. and i do have the time. to be silly. to waste some. i don’t actually have to do the things, i just want to do them. and a break is never long enough to do everything i ever wanted to do. instead i’ll focus on the progress i’ve made, which is anything but little. i should be and i am extremely proud of myself. oh funny thing happened the other day, i accidentally splashed boiling water onto my face and chest when trying to break a bone in my stockpot. and i gave myself a pretty nasty burn that covers more than half my face. the left side. my left. your right. the side with the mole. anyway, so i dealt with it, i’ve been told to avoid exposing my face to the sun or heat in general. so ive been eating a lot of cold foods. and coincidentally watching that episode on gilmore girls where the dragonfly inn catches fire, and sookie can’t use the stoves until the insurance company pays for the contractor to fix them and she lists cold foods, all types of salads and carpaccios. i don’t eat raw meat/fish and i’m over my salad craze. i’m craving a hot roast chicken sandwich with cold tomatoes and zesty mayo on toasted brioche buns. the way i make it. i’m rlly hungry. and there is this lingering melancholy that just grows if i don’t address it every now and then.

for someone who is absolutely terrible at writing, i sure do write a lot. and this is technically writing. right?

even though things are better, i’m not yet okay. my mind still spins too fast. nothing sticks. i’m in distress because my friends are distress. how can we actually be happy if the ones we love are not. so many people so many attachments. it’s been a while since i’ve even had the mental capacity to care for others. i’m hungry as fuck. something is off, something feels bad. is it my hunger. is it my messed up sleep schedule. is it my perpetually cluttered room. is it the pressure of expectations. is it my godawful health, mental or physical. is it eternal.

i can’t fix everything. i can’t fix anything really. i can’t fix things at a rate fast enough to keep up with the pace of destruction. in this life there is too much to fight against. but also too much to fight for. at least i can take solace in the fact that it ends. which is not so much a fact to me as it is a hope. god forbid the heavens exist. i couldn’t take another minute of being, after i have been so relentlessly my whole life. i’m hungry. i’m scared. i’m hopeful. i’m apprehensive. always anticipating danger but never quite ready for it. nothing is ever right enough. except when i find a bit of poetry that changes the fabric of my being. maybe i just need to be receptive in case some poetry finds its way to little old me.

#personal #journal entry

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mercury-and-scry · 5 months

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HI MERC. I HAVE SEVERAL QUESTIONS ABOUT SEVERAL CHATACTERS:

KONNER: 7, 18, 28

MICAH: 10, 15

CLAIRE: 18, 22, 39

YOU: D, G, J

SMOOCHES YOU

ok THIS IS GONNA BE FAT SO I THROW IT UNDER A READ MORE

for Konner:

18: What embarrasses them? Konner is someone who can tend to make a lot of presumptions, and for all her ego, she can be quite embarrassed on the occasions she's proven just dead wrong. Just pointing out to her face that she's been totally proven wrong makes her QUITE humiliated if you do it right. 28. Do they prefer a lie over an unpleasant truth? Of course!!! thats the spiral avatar for you baby!!! For Micah: 10: What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them? that he doesn't see """imaginary""" monsters Micah lies to his parents a lot about what his line of work is, he generally claims to be a scholar and researcher- which isn't totally untrue but its not "I'm a paid paranormal investigator". He isn't prone to shame or guilt without STRONG reason, so the lie doesn't haunt him (but the possibility of them finding out and going "hey what the fuck?" does). 15: How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first? Talking to Micah, it's very clear he considers his words very carefully. It's all very deliberate, and you get the sense it's not so much what he's saying, it's what he's careful to not say. For Claire: 18: What embarrasses them? Claire has a very thick Irish accent and strong dialect, which she got mocked for a lot in school, so she's semi-self conscious about that. 22: How does jealousy manifest itself in them? She gets stabby. 39: How easy is it for them to ignore flaws in other people? It genuinely just depends on whether these flaws impede her or not. If someone is the absolute worst but in a way that doesn't impact Claire, that's just fine. But if she doesn't like someone she'll find EVERYTHIIIIING to dislike about them. For ME (there's three questions so ill do one for each of these guys) (<lazy) D: Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look? (for Konner) Beta Konner was actually wayyy more of a self insert, so she looked a lot more like me and her physical appearance was very different lol. I changed her up on her redesign when I made her a more independent character and since then I've pushed and pulled a bit with stuff like facial structure, but nothing major. G: Which trait of theirs bother you the most? (for Micah) Micah is incredibly secretive. I don't rlly believe in character traits that are "bad" in context to story, but it can be annoying to write a character who never wants to speak about himself because.....son....your lore.....I also form a lot of characters by feeling like they speak to me/tell me ab themselves, so Micah is ACTUALLY secretive to ME. Which is SO fake of him. J) Did you have to manipulate or exclude canon factors to allow them to create your character? (for Claire) Well, Claire is still kind of in beta as far as her lore is concerned but god knows I'll have to do some more research into the Slaughter, since on paper its not a top entity for me. I find it hard to figure out at what point you stab so much it counts as supernatural, lol. SMOOCHES U BACK

#my art #my ocs #tma oc #tma the spiral #tma the dark #tma the slaughter #oc: konner #for context Micah and Claire are also tma ocs #havent introed them here YET but coffee has heard ab them lol #oc questions #oc lore #oc stuff #please everyone send me questions ab my ocs bc I have no art supplies atm and its making me sad

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genderstarbucks · 3 months

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i’m so sorry you’re basically being harassed by some anon! you don’t deserve it, i hope you’re doing alright

they’re just some troll who needs to get a life, people like them make the queer community a worse place, where others don’t feel safe. but the queer community was never about trying to fit in or trying to force yourself into labels you feel you don’t even relate to

these people could just turn their hatred to something useful, like bigots! :)

and these same people love to say stuff like “gender is a social construct, gender is infinite and you can be whatever you want!” but then change their mind with sexuality.

people like this just cannot fathom the fact that people who identify as the same labels as them will not always have the same experience.

for example, i’m a lesbian, and i am attracted to non-binary people, women and any other gender thats not a man, but my friend who is also a lesbian may have a different experience than me.

and going back on the topic of social constructs, the concept of an identity being invalid or valid is also one. i believe the concept of validity is just an excuse to opress other members of the queer community

its not helping or protecting anyone, its hurting people. people who identify as something that you think is “invalid” are not evil monsters or secret fetishists, they’re actually individuals with their own experiences. and those experiences are beautiful!

people often mistake their discomfort for different identities with harm, which are not the same! actual harm being done would be homophobic, transphobia or any kind of queerphobia. not someone identifying as a bi-lesbian.

i also feel that people need to stop assuming so much. listen to others, do not make assumptions right off the bat.

sorry, this kind of spiraled into a rant and its quite long. 😭 i just have a lot to say right now. -@sleepycorvidzz

Thank you! I'm doing alr, I don't let shit like that affect me

And dwbi being a rant, people like that piss me off too cuz like, why do you care so much??

I find it rlly funny how pro xeno exclus are like "gender is infinite, you can be whatever you want!" but expect orientation to be strict, rigid labels that aren't fluid or flexible at all

"Bi lesbians and lesboys are ruining the community!" Actually no we're not, you are hun /nay

Some bisexuals are 50/50 and are only attracted to boys and girls and that's completely fine, but that's not my experience

And some gays are exclusively attracted to men, as am I

We all have different gender and orientation experiences, just bc some ppl use the same label doesn't mean that they have the same experiences

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wiihtigo · 2 years

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youre doing gods work w the boostle list i stg. once that drops its OVER for me. eithet that or ill just hyperfix rlly hard for a week then forget ab it. well see. is there any other dc shit youd rec or whatever while were at it.

MARTY my friend marty is doing gods work theyre helping me a lot rn remembering which specific issues of other comics they show up in before we get to the big big stuff like countdown

as for other dc stuff id rec....Well i recently finishing reading the 80s (and 60s) doom patrol comic and enjoyed it very much! im also watching the tv show and its good but the episodes are like an hour long so its like a Task to sit down and focus on. Im only like a handful of episodes in

I did not fucking care for like the first 20 issues of doom patrol 1987 and almost dropped it until i reached the grant morrison run and it was instantly so good i couldnt stop reading. Ive said this to my friends before but i would say its comparable to the works of stephen king in both the good and the bad ways. It was a good comic in the same way "It" was a good book

The 60s one is fine and i enjoyed it (it has rita! but so does the tv show so if you want to see her but dont want to read a 60s comic you can watch her there) but if youre in it for the surreal really weird storylines you mightve heard rumors of from dp the 80s run is where it all begins. honest to god id say just skip the issues until grant morrison takes over theyre so BORINGGGGG. IN MY OPINION

hm what else have i been reading OH. YOUNG JUSTICE 1998! i recently finished this one as well i dont know why it took me so long it was only 55 issues but it was SOOOOOO GOOD. i do not fucking like the young justice cartoon this comic is the superior yj media i mean just compare yj 98s kon (cool leather jacket. gay earring. undercut. tiny shades. TWO belts) to the tv shows kon (just a t shirt and jeans. ugly haircut. lame. stupid. ugly. die. Straight)

K*N -> THE COOLER KON EL

cant rec this comic enough mostly out of spite for the fact that when most people think of young justice they think of the swagless cartoon and not this beautiful team of teens. For one, the kids actually act like teens in the comic and not young adults having stupid relationship drama. Theyre sweet and stupid and care about eachother and the storylines are really thoughtful and opinionated. a lot of what im saying is regurgitated from things my much more eloquent friend monty has said about yj but since reading it for myself and now knowing firsthand i cant agree more. There was a really awesome story involving arrowette (cissie king jones) about a school shooting and gun violence. a lot of modern comics take the (pussy) centrist route when dealing with big controversies like this but they literally look to the camera and say GUN CONTROL **PLEASE!!!!!!!!**. in an ealier issue theres this funny moment where bart (impulse) zips away to stop some hunters from killing a deer and kon (superboy) is like did you really violate their AMERICAN right to shoot guns? AWESOME!!!!!!!!

also its just earnestly really really really funny. it has that sam and max style of humor which is why i think i loved it so much.

cant sing enough praises for this comic. Also in the yj show they had dick grayson as the robin for the first season? and wally? why do you hate tim drake and bart allen that much. tim kon and bart are a package deal dont separate them you bitch!

umm well that was only 2 comics i ended up recomending but i talked a lot about yj sooooo. there you go

#asks

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pageofheartdj · 9 months

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Hi! Autistic aroace anon from before! I saw your post abt ace Donnie and aro Leo (which btw, I LOVE how their colors are basically their flags? But in Leo’s case it’s his green tone)

And I totally agree!! Donnie seems to have somewhat interest in romance, like the innuendo at the Bearnardo “why I always like the cute and mean ones” and with Atomic Lass. But a teen flirty normal level (thank god, I also agree with you at the “pls they dont care yet, its hormones. Pls focus family and friends), than to actually have smth not rlly, and the arosexual part? I may be projecting a lil here. But he always seemed more interested in the flirt part than anything else.

With Leo, he liked to flirt, but more to charm the person to gain their favor than actually flirt, like in Donnie’s case. He always seemed averse, but not against it, just “yuck”. I felt that was also a normal teen reaction like “I don’t wanna get strings attached” but with smth more, a “yeah, rlly not for me” thing. I can totally see him being gray/demi aro (again projecting? I’m gray/demi aroace), since with some stuff he seems fine but with others, more exaggerated or “honeyed” ones, he gets uncomfortable. But I could understand if ppl put him on sex-repulsed full Aro in the spectrum.

It’s totally wild and funny to me how the fandom is rlly 8/80. The dynamics of both of them being switched in the fandom to fit the box idea that they created for these two is wild to me. “Oh, Donnie’s autistic and 10% of the time, specially in stressful situations, he doesn’t want to be touched? And also a genius nerd? Nah, he’s a goofy goober which the idea of relationships is totally alien and foreign to him, he totally runs from it and has 0 experience of it”. “Oh, Leo’s has narcissistic tendencies and flirted to gain favors before in specific and numbered occasions? He’s totally a flirt, believing everyone wants to date him and he’s a heartbreaker, he totally loves that attention, not uncomfortable at all”

So yeah, sorry for my lil rant, but I rlly do feel whatchu said in that post a whole lot!!

Speaking of colors, he is blue and wore that orange uniform in Air Turtles so yaknow XD

The thing is, the turtles are teens, PLUS they lived an isolated way of life. They had NO way of acting on their interests no matter if they had or didn't have any.

And also. Attraction and relationships are not connected whatsoever! They can. But they don't have to! So the allo person might not want any relationships and aspec person can want and be in one. The relationship status says NOTHING of their identity xD

And moving on to Donnie. He has crushes on fictional character and makes sense, again, no people around. But he also used this his type on Strawberry who are very real and in the moment and is very cute and is very mean to him xD Donnie has a type with real girls too. What he wants to do with this attraction and if he has any sexual attraction is unknown and obviously, it's a kid's cartoon and romance is basically a non-existant part of it(thank god xD). And anyone can hc almost any queer and not queer identity on him, because all of them can and will work xD

Same with Leo, we have some canon moments with him, but it can work for so many queer identities. He is aro as a very direct conclusion. He is grey or demi and his repulsiveness tones down if he falls for someone, etc xD He can also be just a teen who is not into romance but now it extra disgusts him. Anything can work and as long as we are not forcing our hcs on others, it's all good xD

I also hc Donnie a quick developer, he had his plastron developed first, he instalearned his mystics. He could get into the whole romance territory earlier than Leo too xD Leo might not be that enthusiastic the way Donnie is, but still!

Although Mikey doesn't seem to mind and Raph is a big supporter as a comparison xD

And yeeeeeeah I am not a fan(although I can VERY much understand) of latching on this one trait, no matter if it's a rare one or not, and making it the whole personality. Donnie is autistic and very rarely is not 100% excited for a touch? He is touch repulsed autistic. He has canon romantic interests? Nah he is aroace. (Which I LOVE aroace hcs. But I've noticed that in fandoms aroace hcs 99% mean NO romance and NO sex NEVER, even though aspec has SO much variation). With Leo he has these few sad moments and BOOM he is a 100% 24/7 sad boy that was born depressed and all that. Despite the fact that he is very joyful and very confident and very cocky most of the time. YES he copes with jokes, this doesn't mean ALL his jokes are just cover ups. Donnie's copes with collecting data, doesn't mean he doesn't do it on regular just cause he likes it. HECK both of them tend to cope with the thing they like, so they would feel better. Donnie likes data collecting so he copes with it. Leo likes joking so he copes with it.

I love your rants🤝

#rottmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt leo #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise leo #rise donnie

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melancholiaenthroned · 2 years

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dc pride ratings

Super Pride (Jon Kent): 2/10

it sucked so bad… no idea why it was the first in the book bc it definitely prepares you for disappointment. damian came across as homophobic, jon wore a straight pride flag, and jay barely did anything. the art was lovely but overall it just sucked.

Confessions (Nubia): 8/10

frankly i dont read a lot of nubia stuff so i cant speak to characterization but i really enjoyed this one! gorgeous art and very fun and silly story, i so wish there had been just a bit less action and more of her and and Io. will probably read some of her solo stuff after this because she seems great.

Think of Me (Connor Hawke): 10/10

im not a connor hawke fan or arrow fan in general, but oh my god this comic was so good. actually about the characters relationship to his sexuality! fun action scenes and villain! i really liked the music metaphor i thought it was well done. and damian wasnt homophobic in this one! also loved the art style a lot.

Up At Bat (Alysia Yeoh): 9/10

you love to see her again! hope dc actually commits to using her in more stuff now. the story was fun and i like that theyre setting her up as a vigilante. my only issue is a bit of a nitpick with the art, i just dont really like how the bat moves when she uses it haha. it looked curved and therefore looked like it hit weaker. i really liked the message tho and related to the feeling of just. fighting the same battles forever and never getting anywhere. dont know how much i relate to the “beat up supervillains instead” solution but its comics so. duh.

A World Kept Just For Me (Jackson Hyde): 9/10

i dont read a lot of aquaman, but ive heard that they drew his boyfriend skinner in this comic than he normally is, which, upon googling him. yeah. so point off for that. other than that is has got to be one of my favorites. the art and atmosphere is gorgeous and i love the different color palettes between the underwater scenes and the above water ones. i think the story was very very cute and nice and the ending was sweet.

The Gumshoe In Green (Jo Mullein): 8/10

LOVE the noir detective vibes. possibly the funniest instance of biphobia in the world. unfortunately also the most confusing. were they planning to eat her or fuck her? were they bisexual? not really being clear on that sort of lessened the punch of the story for me but frankly it doesnt really matter when the art and vibes are this good.

Public Display of Electromagnetism (Ray Terrill): 7/10

i have no idea who this guy is so that probably effects my ranking. i was bored! who are these people? for ray fans this was probably a big win but i literally have never even heard of him before reading this. i liked his internalized homophobia. that was different from the rest of the stories in this book where it seemed like everyone already was completely happy and secure in themselves. but unfortunately he got over in like a minute so i didnt really feel like it was anything other than cheap conflict. however maybe if ur a ray fan this is like, really deep for him. idk. the art was fine but i didnt love it either. very good light/magic effects but the ppl looked a bit odd. not to pit gay ppl against each other but they couldve put a midnighter and apollo story here instead.

Bats in the Cradle (Kate Kane): 6/10

literally the opposite of the last one. i love kate i read a ton kate so this… like ive heard it all before. this is nothing new. also i hate her dad so i dont care that hes proud of her. i wish it was more kate and her own self acceptance rather than her fathers but i guess they did that last year. and god last years kate story was so fucking good. art was fine and kate looked rlly good when she finally showed up.

INTERMISSION: Ghostmaker splash page: 10/10

is he kidnapping that guy? ok. sure. so confusing bc it genuinely looks like he just swooped in and stole this dude but thats also hilarious so.

Special Delivery (Tim Drake): 9/10

ok as tumblr user bernarddowd you can all guess by stance on comic character bernard dowd. hes perfect to me. i love that he acts and looks more like his 2004 self. i wish he had scars from his pain cult but when have comics remembered scars. i wish he had been there more! less tim. get ur bf on page. tim was fine tho ig. they can get away w not kissing in this story bc i figure they will in the tim drake pride special.

The Hunt (Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn): 10/10

very sweet and funny story. love their insane sex life. i love love love the romance manga art style and the color palette. surprised that it doesnt seem related at all to poison ivys new series but i guess theyre broken up in that so it makes sense. and i will always love to see jester harley even if shes an evil hallucination or whatever.

Are You Ready For This (Jesse Quick): 7/10

too much happened in too few pages, but that could be seen as a meta commentary on their powers? no i idea what goes on in teen justice so just reading this it seems like raven gets hit on and then gets so embarrassed hes like “i can NEVER join teen justice” but im sure he must be talking about something else. felt less like a pride story and more like pride as a setting which isnt a bad thing but it also felt less like a jesse quick story and more like a story where jesse quick was there, which, again, i think is just cause too much stuff was going on. still had fun w it.

INTERMISSION 2: Galaxy and Dreamer splash page: 10/10

WOOOO cheering forever. literally just read Galaxy last night and i LOVED it. never saw supergirl but Dreamer’s actress’s foreword was very nice so im a fan. they look very cute here together.

Finding Batman: 10/10

save the best for last. very touching and upsetting and real. glad for the more nonfiction stuff in this and im so glad that he was able to tell his story through dc. definitely deserves to be the most talked about part of the anthology and it is (other than homophobic damian).

#do not get on me for this #long post #dc #poison.txt

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viniferas · 5 months

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so uh. Funny stuff kinda been happenin. apparently a couple friends admitted that i was basically rizzing everyone around me simply by existing ever since the first day of school ?????

and then a close friend told me (as well as the opinions of several others since the first day of school AND LIKE. SMTH I PERSONALLY NOTICED AS WELL) is that he naturally just excudes a lot of charm and charisma

BUT WHEN. WE'RE IN THE SAME PLACE FACING EACH OTHER ALL THAT RIZZ GOES OUT THE WINDOW. LIKE WE'RE FINE WHEN ONE IS TURNED AWAY. BUT THE MOMENT EYE CONTACT IS ESTABLISHED BOOM.

RIZZLESS. SUDDENLY FORGETS HOW TO SAY ANYTHING EVER AND CANT EVEN BE NORMAL FOR A SIMPLE SECOND

both sides have thought that the other was a player since we've both been confessed to by other ppl and we p much had the same responses to those, ignoring and/or dodging, because we dont rlly wanna address those stuff, AND WHENEVER ONE OF US GETS CLOSE TO THE OTHER, THE OTHER PERSON ENDS UP DRAWING AWAY AND ITS JUST DHAJDHJJSH LOWKEY TERRIBLE

both of us have felt incredibly ecstatic and broken hearted and depressed and jealous and erratic and ridiculous based on how we interact with others, and how we've both thought that the other was interested in someone else, or that the other person was just leading them on, or that we were just playing with each other's feelings. No we're just confusing as hell LOL

cause our classroom and i think ppl from other sections have known and/or are starting to know that He has a crush on someone in class, and that *I* very obviously had one as well but have gotten more lowkey about it, however they dont know who exactly we were crushing on, which meant we were unintentionally giving mixed signals to everyone we accidentally glanced at while lookin for each other HHSAHS

SO ANYWAY I KINDA ADMITTED SMTH TODAY AFTER I SMACKED HIM WITH A CLEAR FOLDER OVER HIS HEAD (but i made sure he wasnt actually hurt) AND THEN IMMEDIATELY APOLOGIZED FOR IT

and i said. "it's not that i don't like you" LIKE WHAT KINDA TSUNDERE ASS VBDIQNHEKW FIRST I PUNCHED HIM OUT OF EXCITEMENT AFTER OUR INTRAMS DANCE WHILE HE WAS WAITING FOR ME WHEN WE EXITED, AND THEN YESTERDAY WHEN WE WERE ALMOST ALONE TOGETHER (there were two other ppl unfortunately which made me feel INCREDIBLY AWKWARD) I JUST. SMACKED HIM. WITH MY FOLDER OF NOTES. WHY

AND THEN APOLOGIZED WITH *THAT* LINE IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL YHINGS LJKE AJEKQOQHRQODHOWWJQODJKE

what kind of damn tropey ass. romance series is this like. Several people have described all this painful pining and longing as like some kinda kdrama or rlly cheesy ass fanfic BC LIKE. THERES ALSO THE INTERPERSONAL DRAMA BETWEEN THE FACT THAT SEVERAL PPL HAVE CRUSHES ON BOTH OF US SEPARATELY. AND THERES SEVERAL OF EM THAT ARE IN OUR OWN CLASS SO ITS LIKE

THAT WAS LITERALLY THE REASON WHY NEITHER HIM OR I PROPERLY MADE A MOVE BC WE KNEW OUR FRIENDS OR ACQUAINTANCES LIKED THE OTHER PERSON AND WE DIDNT WANNA IMPOSE BUT NOW I THINK WE'VE BOTH DISREGARDED THAT ENTIRELY LIKE

we both dont care abt what others have to say anymore we just wanna be togetehfbwjbrje2nr

BUT WE HAVE HORRIBLE TIMING TOO BC JUST TODAY THERE WAS A SCHOOL ANNOUNCEMENT ABT BEING STRICTLY AGAINST PDA WHICH MEANT. NO HOLDING HANDS AND NO KISSING AND LIKE. DAMN. DAMNIT. IM LITERALLY LIKE VERY AFFECTIONATE WITH MY FRIENDS

its to the point where ppl often mistake me for a lesbian or bi or Something bc im very close and hug my friends often and hold their hands n all and been told SEVERAL TIMES THAT I LOOKED LIKE MY FRIENDS' BOYFRIEND LOL

SO ANYWAYS. THE ANNOUCEMENT SAID THAT, "TRUE LOVE WAITS" AND I LITERALLY WJWKABSU when that was announced in class i had Such an obvious WHAT reaction and kept joking abt it for the rest of the day whenever i hung out with my friends and when i first read it in amusement and Lowkey like. Disappointment? He was there watching my expression and his friends teased him abt it too

ajgsjqhajsj i would talk abt all the similarities we have with each other and how he planned somethin that we've both been rlly lookin forward to but i havwnt eaten dinner yet bc when i went home i just fell asleep IMMEDIATELY and im hungry LOL

anyway i hope he asks me out tomorrow otherwise ill just be the one who'll do it directly on friday even if its while everyone else is in class bc i absolutely REFUSE to end this week without any weekend plans or confirmed date i absolute refuse and both of us have been anxiously lookin forward to one, and both of us have been incredibly restless about it for like several weeks so it HAS to happen, like both of our respective friend groups and the ones we share have literally been tryin SO hard to give us several opportunities to show off the other person and like get the other to confess OR LIKE FOR US TO PROPERLY TALK SO AHDMAHRPQHEPQHROQBRKQK

#ANYWAYS I HOPE NEXT UPDATE THERES ACTUAL PROGRESS LMAOO #im gonna do my best not to be stupid

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selznick · 1 year

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idk fucking know.rant ig??? not big idk

but like i ibly rlly have 1 friend that im close to and thats ive opened up to about my austism and ocd like even a bit,,,,, and like my autism is fine or whatever and sure sometimes idk how to deal with people but its fine and we joke so its cool but my ocd is like,, a legit problem for me that I dont joke about but they will,,,, like sometimes i will casually mention it around them but they will joke abt it and like kool whatever,, ocd isnt happenong rn so idc ig

but like she was telling me how she went to a hincent van gogh exhibit abt his life and depression and how she cried at the 'ear'aser in the giftshop after, , and like its a hood point,,, people like to portray him cutting off his ear as like some cutesy joke or romantic gesrure and not like a seriours mental break down and self harm,,, which like cool she cares abt mental health and uknow the seriousness of it all

except when its roght in front of her??? like i messaged her when i wanted to pour boiling water on my foot to 'clean' it and half my brain was fully on board with it and the other half was like no that will make ot worse stop,,, so i messaged her as like idk a reaching out for some sort of help or distraction from my stupif fukcing brain,,, and she was just like,, no why would you do that? and was just argueing with me,, like thats not logical,,,, and I FUCKIING KNOW THAT WHY DO U THINK THERE ISNT BOILING WATER ON MY FOOT WHILE IM TEXTING U,,, and shes just like but why would u eevn think that,, like rememeber ur precious vincent van gogh and his fucking ear and my fuxking ocd,, and shes just like,, ohhh

and i talk to her when i was worried about getting sepsis from a small cut on my toe,, and shes just like no ur fine, uve not got sepsis obvi,, and like i brought it up again cuz its the only thing my brain would think of,, and she got annoyed that i kept bringing it up and now she fuxking jokes about me being obsessed with sepsis and that i just always think i have sepsis

like sorry my brain literally cant stop worrying abt this shit,, sorry i have phantom pains from my ocd that make me worry more and continue the fucking cycle

anyway today i was like ugh im gonna have a headache after yards,, could just feel one starting before it uknow,, and shes like just drink from the water fountain,, and i tell her i cant bcuz there was like a weird bottle on it and other debris around it and my ocd cant handle that,,, and she just tells me to drink from it and that its not an issue,, and when i was like ya no my ocd rmemeber she says shed drink some from it and then i could becuz were liek made from the same stuff so same body,,, and like how can i explain in a concise way that ya u can drink it fine but u r not me with stupid brain disease that doesnt care for logical conclusions and that no we dont have the same body were not even related and the fact i was vomiting for like an entire day not too long ago so my brain has been pretty weird abt it since,, and i cant so i instead say smth like,, no were not the same body and i was sick at christmas and i would still feel ill or throw up because my brain placebo would still fuck it up

she still pushes me to just drink from the fountain cuz its not a big issue but like to me it is,, another friend had a water bottle and offered me some amd that end the conversation so thank god they were there otherwise id have to argue my own thoughts to someone,,, do you srsly think i want my actions to b this illogical,, no i want to just live and be able to carry on without brain worms controlling what i can and cant do

but like its so frustrating to have to argue logic and reason with my own brain,, i dont want to have to have the same arguement with a friend that cant seem to understand how much it affects me because im not currently screaming crying and cutting my limbs off

and it sucks becuz shes like the only person i an talk to but she just doesnt understand and doesnt seem to care

my finger has a cut on it at the moment,, similar to my toe,, and its fucking with my brain,, only thing i can rlly think of,, but i cant talk to the one person i can talk to becuz its just an annoyance to her and i should just get iver it,,, not like i can feel other pain in parts of my body that my brain is relating to it and not like i had to convince myself that my gums were a normal colour (they were) and not blue black,,,, but i cant even just b like o ya my brain thinks im dying can u distracct me cuz shes just be weird about my mental health and bring it up later as a joke

but i dont rlly joke abt my ocd,, i make some nokes abt having it but not my actual symptoms and i feel weird eevn fully talking abt it in case someone find out, doesnt take it serious and doesn something on purpose to spite/upset me,, so for her to make jokes abt my symptoms without even showsing any sympathy while im going through them just fukcing sucks,,, and like ive not daid anything bcuz idk how to breatch that topic,,,,, ummm i think u dont care abt my mental health and it makes me not want to ever talk to u abt it but at the same time ur the only person i can talk to abt it and the jokes make me super uncomfy please inhenrently knpw what my brain needs thanks,, i just,, ik shell be like sorry im not good at reading ppl so i didnt realise cuz thats what she said abt the van gogh and me boiling water foot thing ,,,, like babes u know abt my asd and ocd and im currently telling u abt my distressing thoughts,,, thats not people skills im fucking telling u im going through it like RIGHT NOW and u just do not care

ok this rant was bigger than i thought,, oop

my arm aches now and i need to frind smth to ditract me from the urge to chop ny finger off 🙃🙃🙃

#long post #rant about my asd and ocd and my friend

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mostlykind · 4 years

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smth that makes me rlly sad and insecure is that I feel like I’m not rlly seen by people and I’m easily forgotten, like I’ll go somewhere w a friend and they’re always the first person people see and approach and I’m just talked to cos I’m like.....there but if I was by myself I don’t think they’d want to talk me and then when all is said and done I feel like they forget me so I could meet them again and I always remember faces and people but I think they’d genuinely not know we met

#ugh idk ive always had this fear that im easily forgotten and no one remembers me #and im always scares that people will think im boring and not funny #which is so dumb bc like why tf should i care!??? not everyone is entitled to know who i am #but its like i have smth to prove like no no no pls like me pls think im cool i swear im funny and nice #ffs i rlly need to get over this somehow #and not being seen fuuuuuuxk me thats a big one #ive never been approached by guys and even like w girls ive kinda always been a loner lmao?#like i have my close group of friends but i never rlly do big groups #and if i befriend someone its just the one person and they might introduce me to others #so like i lowkey feel like im invisible #and it always turns into stuff like omg they must think im ugly or a bitch or boring #and like wHY is my brain so concerned w this shit #i just want to be fine w whatever people may or may not think #and be ok w being perceived as boring or not funny cos i know im not!!!#yet here we are oversharing on the internet #😗✌🏼#anyways i have my close girl friends to be thankful and grateful for #not many people can say that like theyre like my sisters and i love them #i just gotta stop comparing myself to other people and understand that people perceiving me in whatever way is beyond my control #rahma’s rambles

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not-me-simping-for-blasty · 3 years

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some thoughts on what living with bakugou would be like:

-he’s weirdly organized. like he remembers where he put everything every time so if ur ever looking for something, most times he’ll just find it for u and it takes like .2 seconds

-will cook meals a large majority of the time, but if u bake sweets he’s an absolue sucker for them.

-if you’re like reALLY allergic to a certain type of bug or plant,, man’s got his eyes pEELED whenever y’all go somewhere together. like lets say, for example, ur allergic to bees. bakugou is blowing bees up left and right and u look at him and ur “no!! stop!!! bees are endangered!!” ,, he looks u dead in the face, like ur stupid or something and says “yeah. because of me. i’m gonna kill all of them.”

- if u have to get in an argument with somebody over the phone, he wants to hear it. like he’ll ask u to put the phone on speaker and he’ll just make mocking, bitchy faces while the other person is speaking. like,, he lets u fight ur own battles, but he wants to be there bullying the other person mercilessly in the background.

-if he doesnt like a song ur playing, he’ll just skip it. won’t ask, wont look at u, he’ll just skip it. borderline dick move tbh

-gets grumpy if u don’t follow his nightly routine on time, but also wont go to sleep without u. like he’ll just stay up and crab at u until u go to bed with him

-likes when u brush his hair for him. like u’ll be brushing yours, totally by urself fine, and he’ll just look at u and clear his throat until u roll ur eyes and beckon him over

-if u get like a bag of junk food or something,, do nOt leave that shit out, bakugou will finish it 10/10 times. he’ll finish it but then look at u and “why the fuck would u even bring that shit in here, huh? u tryin’ to get me out of shape or somethin?” ,, and u look at him like “idk man maybe just dont eat it then.” ,,, the glARE he gives u in response is muRDEROUS //pls this is quite literally the only area he lacks self control dont remind him\\

-has absolutely no regard for neighbors. he yells a lot and if y’all get noise complaints he just glares and 😡💥at the neighbor until they get scared and leave

-he thinks it’s funny to just subtly move things from time to time. like, for example, lets say plates. ,,, so like, u always keep plates on the left side of a certain cabinet, right?? but if he’s putting dishes away and feeling particularly petulant that day, he’ll just put away the plates on the right side instead. man’s then proceeds to smirk and laugh at u every time u open the wrong side of the cabinent from then on with a “jeez, u rlly are a moron, huh? they’re on the right side, remember?” god he’s annoying

-genuinely enjoys going grocery shopping by himself. like idk he just thinks it’s his quiet, personal time, u kno?? and he enjoys doing super-intense meal prep for the week anyways so he’s gotta make sure he gets the right ingredients

-u just hear muffled screaming from time to time. like u’ll be in the kitchen eating breakfast totally calm, and he’s making the bed and all the sudden just a “jesus fucking christ, swear to fuck im gonna blow up this stupid fuckin’ fitted sheet!” (which honestly??? valid. fuck fitted sheets.)

-if he doesn’t want to hang out with the bakusquad but they’re forcing him he’ll text u something like “I love you.” and then ofc ur like “i love u too. but also, u never just say that to me normally?? is something wrong?” and then total radio silence from him for like 20 mins and u get super worried,, and then he just sends u a video of mina or denki being loud with a “Can you get sick or something? I want to come home.” ,, i- 🧍

- isnt going to want a pet,, but if u have, like, a dog already when u move in with him, then it’s going to become bakugou’s dog. if he’s going to have to have a dog than he’s gonna make sure it likes him more than u

-hates doing laundry. will volunteer to do dishes instead 11/10 times

-he doesn’t sing in the shower but 100% plays the drums on the walls or his own stomach fight me on this

-he hates the smell of nail polish/nail polish remover. so if ur painting ur nails he’ll just walk in the room and walk directly out,, quickest way to get alone time

-speaking of alone time- say bye. u’ll get none of it,,, it’s not that he’s constantly on top of u or like talking to u, he just always sorta ends up in whatever room u are. like a cat, pretty much. like he won’t say anything, but if u get up to do something, he gets up and chooses to move his lounging to somewhere nearby

-he likes to scare the shit out of u. just like, rlly juvenile stuff like hiding around corners just to jump out at u. will just stand there and laugh when u scream, and will never, never apologize

-he gets weirdly worked up about hair?? just hates it, thinks it’s disgusting if he sees a stray hair anywhere. even if its his own. like yes it’s gross ig, but he gets so 🤮 about it

-he does house chores unecessarily loudly. like, u watch him and it seems like he’s doing everything totally normally,, but jesus christ why is it so loud

-gets bitchy around christmas if u decorate without him. he will complain the eNTIRE time if he does have to decorate, but will throw an even bigger fit if u dare to do it without him

-he gets mad if people drive too fast in ur neighborhood/ past ur apartment complex. like, y’all have 0 (zero!) kids, but he’s still up at the window like “Slow the fuck down, asshole! Why the hell doesn’t anyone have any common fuckin’ sense around here? That’s dangerous, you piece of shit!”

-if u sing around the house a lot, it’s the only habit of urs he’ll have absolutely nothing to say about. like it doesn’t even matter if ur a good singer or not, he just likes when he can hear u in the house even if ur not in the same room. he finds it comforting

-bakugou hates having people over to ur place. he thinks of it like his calm-space/safe-haven and it rlly pisses him off when people are there

-on the rare days he doesn’t have to work at all and stays home, mans is a total baby. he just refuses to get up for anything other than bathroom or meals and even then goes straight back to bed. he takes basically a 24 hr nap and expects u to do the same with him he’s so dramatic pls

-will make snarky comments about reality tv shows with u. just the bitchiest shit possible bc he enjoys trash talking as an art form, and absolutely does not care who it’s about

-likes to watch u do skincare stuff. he won’t ask questions and will be borderline offended if u offer some to him, but he just likes to watch u do it. man’s thinks of it as like his personal asmr

-hates online shopping. (pls i have absolutely no explanation for this one i just know its true)

-he has a lot of pride in his house so it’s actually rlly well decorated. like, he would never consent to living somewhere busted, lmaooo, so if u dont kno how to decorate he’ll figure it out for the both of u

-u can always tell if he’s falling asleep bc he constantly does that weird full-body jerk. like the one where it feels like ur falling

#bnha bakugou #bakugou katsuki #bnha bakugo katsuki #mha bakugou #bnha fic #katsuki bakugou #bakugou x reader #bakugou x y/n #mha fic

738 notes · View notes

ratmonky · 3 years

Text

Out of Body Experience

Word Count: 4.9K

Warnings: semi-public

AO3 Link

[You matched with Maru!]

[Send Maru a message!]

Maru: Hey.

(username): hiii!!

Maru: You look cute in your pictures on your profile.

(username): omg you think so?? i’m really happy!! i thought you had a rlly cool bio,,, i guess i did the right choice to like your bio

Maru: Thanks. I was surprised to get a notification that we matched. You’re way out of my league.

(username): don’t say that maruuu~ i bet you look handsome irl

Maru: I don’t.

(username): hmm, wanna prove it?? >.<

Maru: I don’t know.

(username): don’t be shy!! ur bio said you lived in kyoto, wanna meet up this saturday?

Maru: You’ll be disappointed.

(username): i promise i won’t!!! i like meeting new ppl!!! besides if we didn’t click we can still be friends?? i feel like you and i will be close no matter what!!

Maru: Are you sure? We just met.

(username): yep!!! come ooooonnnnn it’ll be fun to hang out!!

Maru: Fine.

(username): yay!!! let’s meet in front of the train station!! ahh i’m so excitedddd i can’t waittt TwT

Maru: Me too.

(username): <3

[Maru: <3………….. (send)]

Kokichi paused and deleted the message.

Maru: See you.

~~~

Kokichi’s first impression of you was that you were naive and careless. You wanted to meet up with him without any hesitation, what if he was someone who could harm you?

He stared at his screen and at your pictures.

You were gorgeous, he had never seen someone as pretty as you. On top of all that you wanted to meet him.

It made him feel special, wanted even.

~~~

When a notification sound filled his ears, Kokichi immediately checked if it was from you.

(username): maruuuuu!!!! i missed u ))):

He stared at the message and read it three times but didn’t quite understand why you would miss him.

Maru: What?

(username): i thought you’d text me but u didn’t,,, i couldn’t sleep cuz i was thinking about u

Maru: I didn’t think you wanted me to text you.

(username): )):

Maru: ?

(username): )))):

Maru: (:

(username): (((((:

Maru: You’re childish aren’t you?

(username): what about it q;

Maru: Nothing. How old are you anyway?

(username): old enough to drinkkkk!!!

Maru: Me too. Which Jujutsu college are you going to?

(username): ohh, hehe… i dropped out cuz it wasn’t my thing

Maru: That’s irresponsible. Did you drop because you couldn’t keep up with your curse classes or was it for some other reason?

(username): maruuuu stop talking about jujutsu with meee!!!

Maru: Then what should we talk about?

(username): about our date >.<

Maru: Date?

(username): did u forget already )):

Maru: Forget what?

(username): our date on saturday )):

Maru: That’s a date?

(username): TwT ur making me sad maru

Maru: I don’t understand it, we just said we’d meet up.

(username): this is a dating website for ppl like us ///:

Maru: You want to date me?

(username): idk anymore,,, seems like ur a heartbreaker and i feel like u don’t feel a connection between us as i do

Maru: Wait! Don’t jump to conclusions all by yourself! You don’t even know what I look like, how can you be so sure that you want to date me?

(username): i mean,,, we matched for a reason,,, i liked ur bio and wanted to get to know u better is that bad??

Maru: No. No, it isn’t. I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings. I'm new to this sort of stuff.

(username): apology accepted!!!! ahhhh ur so cute,,, i can’t wait to meet u

Maru: Same here.

~~~

His classmates knew something was up. Robotic demeanor was gone and instead, it was actually a part of himself as Kokichi that was showing through.

“Mechamaru looks happy nowadays,” Kamo noted.

“It’s relieving that he shows us a softer side of himself,” Miwa added. “Makes me feel happy for him.”

“I wonder what caused him to become this way.” Kamo was talking to himself but Todo took it upon himself to answer.

“He has finally found himself a Takada-chan.” Todo grinned. “Reminds me, I never asked him what his type of woman is.”

There was a moment of silence before Todo walked out into the campus garden to make his way towards Mechamaru.

Mechamaru didn’t notice his presence as he was watering the flowers.

“Yo.”

“Todo. Did you need something?”

“What’s your type of woman?”

Caught off guard, Mechamaru dropped the watering can. “I… I think someone who’s kind and cheerful.” Someone who’s submissive.

“Like I guessed.” Todo held his chin between the knuckle of his forefinger and thumb as he hummed thoughtfully. “You’re as lifeless as your puppet.”

~~~

What did that suppose to mean?

Kokichi was just telling the truth.

Right?

~~~

Days passed until Friday came.

Kokichi talked to you almost every day and whenever he could. He seemed to enjoy your company more than he thought he would when the two of you first matched.

He woke up to your messages and went to sleep only after he texted you goodnight.

Today, he felt like his heart was going to jump out of his ribcage, he could hear his own pulse when it got too quiet and it was dead silent in his hideout… as always.

All he could think about was your date tomorrow. He had made sure to dress up Mechamaru nicely for the occasion and checked the weather report thrice so the date wouldn’t be ruined because of anything out of his control.

There was still something that made him extremely anxious. What if you didn’t like him? What if everything went terribly and you blocked his number?

He needed something to distract him from these negative thoughts.

Maru: Hey.

(username): maruuuu!!!! what r u doin??

Maru: Going to sleep soon, I think.

(username): without me (;

Maru: Never.

(username): i’m blushing

Maru: How are you?

(username): fine, i'm doing skincare tonight to get ready for our date!!

Maru: About that...

(username): ....

(username): are you going to cancel our date?

Maru: No! I’m just anxious about it.

(username): good cuz i’d block u

Maru: I don’t think you would.

(username): you don’t know me

Maru: Because you never told me about yourself.

(username): ^-^; haha yeah,,, so,,, what would you like to know?

Maru: Everything.

Without even noticing the passing time, Kokichi chatted with you until he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore.

He learned everything about you. From the earliest memory, you could recall about your first interaction with a cursed spirit to your latest obsession with an online game about cute animals.

His eyelids were getting heavier, he texted you goodnight and how he was excited to meet you tomorrow.

When he closed his eyes, this time he managed to fall asleep.

~~~

You pressed your phone to your chest and kicked at your sheets. The excitement was eating you up, the butterflies in your stomach wouldn’t calm down either. All because of someone you met online a couple of days ago.

It wasn’t something new to you to meet up with people you met online but this felt a lot different.

Previous times, you had used different dating apps or social media websites to make friends but this was the first time you had used a dating website specifically for people who knew the existence of curses.

Jujutsu sorcerers often found it hard to find someone they could click with because of their field of work but this website had risen up to popularity from day one. Your old classmates from your jujutsu college wouldn’t shut up about it so you gave it a go after their insisting.

Maru was one of the first people you matched with on the website. In his profile, he had written about how he wanted to find someone he could be himself with and date them.

That’s why tomorrow, you had to be on your best behavior so he could be himself around you.

~~~

You were twenty minutes early.

It wasn’t your intention to arrive this early but whether it be the excitement to meet up with Maru or not wanting to make him wait if your train was late-

Wait, those were all connected.

Letting out a sigh, you checked your phone. Yep, still twenty minutes. Once you put it back in your purse, your eyes scouted around the station. There weren’t any empty spaces for you to sit so you were standing by a meeting point next to the maps, hoping Maru would see you.

Although you didn’t know what he looked like, you had put effort into how you looked today so you could impress him. Deep inside, you hoped he would take notice of your appearance and compliment you but some men were just too dense.

From the way he had started texting you, he gave you the impression that he was one of those stoic and dense men but as you started to get to know him better, he turned out to be quite a friendly person. Very talkative and caring.

You pressed a hand on your cheek, you were burning up. Geez, were you really blushing this much because of him?

When you told your friends about this date, they had told you not to have too many expectations about Maru. They believed you were being catfished but it wasn’t possible, you didn’t want to meet him because of his appearance after all.

“Um, excuse me-”

Startled, you lifted your head to stare at a… robot?

You stepped away from its way, thinking that you were standing in front of its charging station or something. How long had it been since you had gone out? Had robots already taken over? Or was this one of those public pranks?

The robot was staring at you even after you moved away.

“(username)?”

You lifted your gaze and looked at the robot with wide eyes. “M-M-Maru?”

It nodded, “Mechamaru.”

No, it wasn’t a robot. You could sense cursed energy oozing from it. More like a cursed doll. Nevertheless, you were speechless.

There was a long pause before you spoke. “Ah, I...” You looked around as if you were searching for an exit and anxiously clutching on your purse.

Great, you were going to make up an excuse and go away. Just like he thought you would.

“I thought I was going to meet you, not a puppet.”

“I’m here,” he said, static sizzling noise coming from him was like nails on a chalkboard. “I just can’t be physically here because of my condition.”

“You could’ve told me about it first… ahh, sorry.” You sounded more annoyed than you would have liked but quickly covered it up by bowing your head to greet him. “Nevermind, I’m (name).”

“Are we going to use real names?”

“Well, I’m not gonna call you Megaman.” There was a smile.

“Mechamaru,” he corrected. After a short silence, he added, “Kokichi.”

“Nice to meet you Kokichi, I hope we can get along well.” You bowed yet again.

“Why are you being so formal?”

“It’s cuz…” You pointed at him.

“What?”

“Well…” You used both hands to gesture his whole body.

“If you say it’s because I’m a robot or anything similar to that, I’ll go home.” He sounded serious, or maybe it was because of the static.

You pouted and leaned forward on your tiptoes, “If I can’t even joke around then I’ll go home.”

“I thought you were looking forward to our date.” When you blushed at his words he spoke again. “You look cuter than your pictures.”

“Ahh, you really think so?” You started walking and he followed after you.

“I do.” He was keeping a large space between the two of you, whenever you tried to walk closer to him, he would move away but now when you were caught in the station with the crowd who were going home after work hours, you had to stay close to him.

You were being pushed against Kokichi thanks to the crowd trying to walk out of the station and he didn’t complain about it. Kokichi didn’t look at you, he thought about the things he read on the internet instead.

‘If you want your date to consider you as manly, you have to invest yourself to talk to her.’

“Your dress looks cute.” Kokichi came up with ‘the compliment her outfit’ route, he had seen men flirt before, he could do it too.

He stared down for a moment to see your reaction.

Bingo!

You smiled brighter than the sun, you played with your hair to give him a playful answer. “Thank you, I wore this just for our date.” Your eyes shined with small sparkles in them. “I really like your collar.” You pointed at his face, not too close, hesitant to invade his personal space. I’m here with his puppet not him, you reminded yourself.

“Thanks.”

When the two of you finally exited the station, you walked alongside him.

“Where to?” He nonchalantly asked while you were looking around the streets.

“What about karaoke?” You gave him an inviting smile, “It’d be fun.”

“Whatever you say.” He wasn’t sure which way you were taking. There was the main street and Kyoto's red-light district, of course, he knew you wouldn’t be going there. “Which street are we going for?”

You pointed to your right, “The main street, there is a karaoke place I know.” Your smile altered when you noticed how this time when you walked together to cross the street, it was close, your shoulder touched his fake biceps.

“I’m not good at singing for obvious reasons.” Back in his bathtub, Kokichi said it in a joking manner but thanks to the cursed puppet, it sounded a lot as if he was annoyed about the idea of going into karaoke. He bit his tongue and cringed, waiting for your reaction.

“You can still try, can’t you?” You gave him the best puppy eyes you could. “For me?”

Kokichi blushed but you weren’t able to see it through Mechamaru. “Y-yeah.”

“Oh, I didn’t know robots could stutter.”

“I didn’t stutter and I’m not a robot. This is a cursed puppet and sometimes the commands I give are interrupted, that’s why I-”

“You’re so easy to tease just as I guessed!”

Kokichi covered his mouth with his hand, watching you giggle at him through his screen.

“Here it is.” Pointing at a sign, you grabbed his arm and dragged him with you.

While you were showing him the prices, he was busy staring down at your shirt. He could… he could see your cleavage.

“The menu says they serve alcohol at this hour! Ahh, the prices are cheaper than the last time too! We can share the tab-” You stopped yourself from talking. Silence brought him out of his trance. “Oops, sorry. You can’t eat or drink through Megaman, right?”

“Mechamaru,” he corrected. “No, I can’t… But it’s on me anyway.”

“You’ll pay?” Your eyes sparkled brighter than the stars. Your pouting lips and hand on his chest didn’t help.

Kokichi looked away, blushing. “Y-yeah.”

“Y-you’re the best!” Mocking his stuttering, you offered him a cute smile. Then you went on to drag him inside while telling him about how this place was the best karaoke place in Kyoto because they served desserts and your favorite cocktail. All the while renting a room for the two of you.

“Would you like to share with others?” The employee asked.

“No.” Your answer was instantaneous.

Behind the register, the employee stared at Kokichi and down at you. It was easy to tell he thought the two of you were a mismatch. “Your room is to the left, you can order through the smart tablet. Have fun.”

“Thanks,” you said before walking past the register. When Kokichi caught up with you, you turned around. “Did you see the way he stared? So lame!”

“Well, anyone would have stared if they saw a pretty girl next to a robot.”

“So, you’re accepting you’re a robot?” You grinned, opening the door to the private room.

“That’s not what I meant!” He didn’t know what he was expecting. From the way you texted, he should have known you were this childish and unable to have a serious conversation.

“Hmm?”

“Nothing.” He closed the door behind him as you were ordering as many drinks as you could. Once he noticed you were about to order the entire menu, he barely managed to stop you by taking the smart tablet away from your hands. “Hey, I’m not rich!”

“It’s cheap, trust me!” You pouted your lips again, reaching for the smart tablet he was holding above your head.

His stare found the menu and froze. It was cheaper than he had thought like you said. He had never been somewhere like this, nobody could blame him for it.

“Sorry, I didn’t notice,” he said as he handed the device back to you.

“I was showing you the menu earlier, you weren’t listening, were you?” Your smile widened, eyes squinting knowingly.

“I was listening! You’re talking way too much, I can’t keep up!”

You crossed your legs, continuing to add stuff to your order.

It got quiet.

Realizing what he had said was rude, he apologized.

“It doesn’t sound genuine.”

“It’s because I’m talking through a puppet.”

“Exactly.”

You weren’t looking at him. Putting the tablet aside, you leaned back on the soft cushions. The mood had changed. When you weren’t talking, it was too quiet.

Decidedly, he walked over to the karaoke machine and grabbed two microphones. He sat next to you, placing one of the microphones next to you as he reached for the tablet.

There were way too many songs in the system and he knew none of them.

Scrolling further, he found Takada-chan’s songs.

“You like Takada-chan?” you asked, noticing how he had stopped scrolling.

“No,” he replied. “My friend-” Was he really his friend? “My friend likes her, he won’t stop talking about her and all.”

“I like her,” you said. “I’ve been to her meet and greets many times but they’re always ruined by some buff dude who has the most tickets. He’s always at the events, kinda creepy but seems like he supports her. He once beat up some guy who insulted her.”

Kokichi didn’t say anything. He didn’t want that guy to be the icebreaker on his date.

“Creepy,” he uttered before putting the tablet on your lap. “You should sing, I don’t know any of these songs.”

“None of them?” You raised a brow.

“None.”

“You’re so boring,” you murmured, clicking on the first song you saw.

The loud music filled the room and his hideout. You tapped on the microphone, “Check, one, two. Kokichi is sooooo boring!”

Your laughter was the next thing that filled his hideout. He chuckled but it came out as a static noise through Mechamaru.

While you were singing, the same employee came with two trays full of drinks and snacks, he left them on the table before leaving immediately. None of you paid any mind as you were changing the lyrics to tease Kokichi.

“Are those really the lyrics?” he asked.

“Yep!”

Another giggle.

Too cute.

Very cute.

He watched you stop singing for a brief moment to chug down your third drink. Your cheeks were flushed red from the booze and your neck was sweaty, you kept fanning your hand towards your face.

His gaze focused on a particular sweat droplet on your neck and idly watched as it drizzled down to your cleavage before disappearing under the fabric of your dress.

Kokichi tried focusing on something else but he found himself unable to tear his eyes away from you. Every single thing you did was seductive. When you bit onto a small rice cake or the way your lips closed around the straw of your drink and how your cheeks hollowed when you tried sucking the last bits of your cocktail in your mouth.

The last drop had to be when you grabbed an ice cube from your drink and held it over the skin of your chest.

His hand pressed on his lower half. He was thankful he wasn’t physically there or he would have been labeled as a pervert. Under the soothing medical liquid, he had a problem you didn’t need to see.

You weren’t singing anymore but the music was playing nonetheless to suppress the silence as Kokichi was practically undressing you with his eyes.

“Heyyy, Kokichi~” you slurred, sitting closer to him. “You’re being too quiet!”

Taken aback, he spoke. “I’m not sure what to say?”

“Just talk…” you whined, putting a hand on his knee.

Oh, how he wished he could feel the warmth of your hand.

“Or better… Sing!” You held a microphone up to his face.

“I can’t sing,” he reminded.

“You said, you’d sing for meee~”

He blushed, taking the microphone from your hand. “I don’t know the lyrics.”

“It’s on the screen.”

Yes, the lyrics were on the screen.

He felt embarrassed, this was stupid. He wasn’t even actually in the room with you but he felt so nervous. His actual hands were shaking as he gulped.

When he started singing, you started laughing.

The static made it sound like he was an actual robot. Yet, Kokichi didn’t stop despite how tone-deaf his voice was coming through Mechamaru. He wanted to make sure you were having fun but the music stopped.

Both of you stared at the notification on the tablet, asking if you wanted to add another hour to your stay.

Had it already been an hour? Time was going fast when you two were having fun.

You looked at Kokichi.

He pressed to accept.

The music continued playing.

This time, Kokichi didn’t sing. The two of you started chatting about everything and anything until there was a lull in the conversation.

“Lemme see your hand,” you said, reaching your own towards him. He slowly placed his hand on your open one and you compared the size. “Wow, your hand is hugee, is your real hand this big?”

Funny, if not absurd. You were on a date with a puppet but you were getting turned on.

“It's the same size as my own hand.” His gaze dropped to his actual body. “At least one of them.”

“Can you feel that?” You intertwined your fingers with his.

“No.” He wasn’t looking and he didn’t need to look. The depressing realization that he was always going to watch people behind a screen and in this damn bathtub was starting to sink in once again.

“Can you feel this?” You were giggling.

“I told you, I can’t feel-” His breathing stopped at the sight of you pressing his hand on your breast.

“I wanna meet you, Kokichi~” Smiling enticingly, you sat closer to him. “It’s no fun when I can’t see if you’re blushing right now.” Your hand over his hand moved on your breast, the supple flesh jiggled under the front of your dress. “Are you blushing right now?”

“I am.” His answer was instant.

“You know,” you started, putting your free hand on his thigh and lifting your leg up on the cushion to face him. “I got all dressed up ‘cause I wanted you to lose your composure. You sounded so uptight and stoic. I wanted to see you lose it.” Tilting your head, you puckered your lips. “But you didn’t even come to our date.”

“I did.”

“Megaman did.”

“Mechamaru.”

“I wanted Kokichi to come.” You pulled his hand away from your breast and led it down to your stomach and even lower. “I wish you were here so you could feel how wet I am.”

“(name),” he said. “I can’t feel my fingers through Mechamaru.”

“Mm?” You placed his hand under the skirt of your dress. “But I can feel them.”

Kokichi’s actual hand started shaking in excitement as Mechamaru’s fingers brushed against your panties.

“Can’t I meet you?” Your voice was faint compared to the music but he heard it. “I wanna meet you.”

“You’ll be disappointed, I don’t look… normal.”

“You don’t look normal right now either.” Biting your lip, you moved against his hand. A soft gasp left your lips. “Yet, I’m so turned on right now.”

There were a thousand different thoughts invading his mind but Kokichi felt like he was hypnotized by your hips.

“Kokichiii, move your fingers,” you whined softly, your eyes hazy with lust.

“I need to see them,” he said. Back in his room, his own hand was pressing down on his growing erection. “Or I may move them wrong.”

“Pervert~” you teased, lifting the skirt of your dress up.

He didn’t say anything, instead focused his attention on your soaked panties. How long had you been this wet? From the moment you two rented the room or-

“Kokichi.” Your needy voice brought him out of his dirty thoughts. “You don’t have a cock under your pants, do you?” Your hand pressed against Mechamaru’s groin.

For the first time in his life, Kokichi felt his entire body jolt. Your vulgar way of asking was enough to get him rock hard. “No-”

“What a waste.” Sulking, you retrieved your hand. “But are you hard right now?”

“I… I am.”

A dangerous glint sparkled through your eyes. “If only you were here… I’d make you feel sooo good.”

Mechamaru’s fingers pressed against your clothed folds before moving along them. A soft moan left your lips and you balanced yourself on your hands.

“I look like a freak-”

“You keep saying that.” Your hips moved against his hand. “As if that matters to me.”

Mechamaru slid your panties to the side and spread your folds with two of his fingers, he carefully watched as wet strands connecting them together broke apart. Kokichi’s own hand was pumping his cock.

“What are you doing right now, Kokichi?”

“I’m putting a finger inside.” He inserted one of his fingers inside you.

“No, what are you really doing?” You bit your lip.

“I’m… I’m jerking off.”

Satisfied with his answer, you crossed a leg over his to settle on his lap with your back against his chest. Spreading your legs wider, you allowed him a better view of your wet pussy. Mechamaru’s digits slid inside as Kokichi moved his hand along the length of his cock.

Mechamaru’s other hand went to cup your breast over your shirt, making a moan escape your lips.

His fingers were reaching deeper than your own fingers ever could. The digits moved in a scissoring motion and curled against your gummy walls, pressing against the spot that made your vision blurry.

“Kokichi,” gasping, you squirmed on his lap, your back arched when his thumb grazed over your clit. “I wanna kiss you so bad.”

Kokichi’s hand tightened around the tip of his cock, he pulled the sensitive skin down to expose the pink tip and massaged it using his thumb. When his hand started moving along his cock again, the device helping him talk through Mechamaru picked up the clicking sound rather than the medical fluid splashing.

You moaned at the realization of what you were hearing.

The feeling of the metallic firm fingers stroking your clit made your hips buck against his hand. Your eyes roll to the back of your head, panting, you pressed your thighs together.

Mechamaru’s hand on your chest moved down on your thigh to hold you in place as his fingers inside your pussy started to vibrate. The sudden pleasure made you scream but the loud music concealed it.

Kokichi couldn’t breathe normally, his pulse had gone haywire as his hand was moving hastily around his cock while Mechamaru’s digits were messing you up.

“S-s-s-stop!” Your voice broke into a moan.

“Do you really want me to stop?” He barely managed to ask, his hand wouldn’t stop.

You shook your head rapidly, biting your lip.

Your walls clenched around the digits, sucking them in deeper. Kokichi’s own hand was moving faster than his heartbeat. His tongue lolled out of his mouth and his shoulders tensed.

He was close.

From the way you were shaking, he could say the same thing for you.

So, when Mechamaru pushed his digits further inside, the vibration got stronger and stronger until your legs shook. The pleasure that was building in your gut suddenly got released, shaking you to your core.

Kokichi followed suit, his cock spurted thick clumps of cum and they landed on his stomach, his bandages absorbed his seed.

By the time he caught his breath, he realized you were still on his lap.

Mechamaru had gone limp as he had gotten distracted because of his orgasm. He revived the cursed doll while you were trying to fix your dress.

You wanted to say something but you couldn’t find something to say.

To your rescue, the music stopped.

The tablet had the same notification from before. Informing you that the second hour had ended and if you wanted to rent the room for one more hour.

Kokichi leaned forward and pressed on the tablet to end the session.

“We’re leaving already?” you pouted your lips.

“You said you wanted to meet me.”

Kokichi watched as the brightest smile he had ever seen formed on your face.

After he paid the tab the two of you exited the building as he held you up with one hand because your legs weren’t functioning properly.

“The employee behind the register noticed your wobbly legs,” Kokichi said.

“You think so?” you whispered, cheeks and ears colored in bright red.

“He was looking, so, yes.”

“You kinda went overboard by using Megaman’s vibrator hands.” Your giggle filled his ears and he smiled to himself.

“It’s Mechamaru.”

#this was gonna be a dark one but my friend told me to rewrite it lmao #anywayyyy kokichi supremacy #mechamaru x reader #kokichi muta x reader

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