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#negan smith fluff
vilentia · 1 year
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If Negan had a soft spot for you
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Over time, Negan developed a soft spot for you, impressed by your intelligence, resourcefulness, and fearlessness.
Your influence on Negan has been profound but subtle, forcing him to confront his own moral code and rethink his worldview.
Negan is fiercely protective of you, though he would never admit it to anyone, not even himself.
It's only to you that Negan shows his vulnerable side, trusting you in a way he never has anyone else.
While he may never admit it outright, Negan often seeks your advice.
You are one of the few people who can make Negan genuinely laugh.
Even though he would never admit it, Negan has a habit of bringing you small gifts like candy or magazines.
Negan finds himself thinking about you often, even when you're not around, which annoys him to no end.
You have a calming effect on Negan, the only person who can prevent him from losing his temper.
Negan struggles with admitting that he likes you, fearing it may make him look weak.
You often help Negan see situations from different angles, preventing him from making rash decisions.
Negan is secretly proud of your accomplishments and loves to boast about them to others.
You are the only person that Negan is willing to make compromises for.
Negan will drop everything to help you, regardless of the situation.
Convincing Negan to show mercy is a rare occurrence, and only you have the power to do it.
Negan's soft spot for you is something he'd never reveal to anyone, not even his most trusted lieutenants.
Negan is fiercely jealous of anyone who tries to get close to you, though he would never admit it.
You provide a sounding board for Negan, allowing him to talk through his problems without fear of judgment.
Negan struggles with his soft spot for you, viewing it as a weakness, but he can't help how he feels.
Even though he may act tough and intimidating, you know that Negan is a big softie at heart, and that's part of what makes him special to you.
Negan might start to consider more ethical and moral decisions, recognizing that there is more to life than just power and control.
Ultimately, Negan's soft spot for you would make him a more complex and nuanced person, with a greater capacity for empathy and compassion.
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daryl-dixon-daydreams · 2 months
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reader pronouns: she/her
Lydia watched Negan's expression, the sparkle in his eyes as they flickered over your face as you said goodbye. They followed your figure until you disappeared into a building down the street. "Wow. You like her," she said with a laugh. "A lot," she emphasized.
Negan pulled his ball cap off and rubbed a hand over his hair, sighing. There was an almost abashed expression on his face. "Yeah... I look at her and I just—I can't fuckin' help it—it's like when the Grinch's heart grows three sizes," he said.
Lydia gave him a strange look. "What's the Grinch?" she asked.
"Ah. Right... Uhh... Well," Negan tipped his head thoughtfully. "It's this character from a kid's book back in the day. He's an angry, mean-tempered asshole."
Lydia snorted. "Oh, that is like you."
Negan shot her a half-serious glare. "Don't you have some zombie to go hit with a stick or something?" Lydia grinned at him. "Anyway, he's a real dickbag at first but through kindness and a little whimsical Christmas magic and really irritating singing he learns to love again. Heart grows three sizes. And he becomes less of asshole and does what he can to make amends," he finished. Fuck, that was an even more appropriate comparison than he'd first realized. His eyes drifted back to where your fingers had brushed his as you'd handed him that shiny red apple. They still seemed to tingle slightly.
"Negan," Lydia said, her brow furrowing.
"Hmm?" he hummed, taking a bite and savoring the crisp sweetness.
"Are—are you in love with her?" Lydia asked, surprised, but smiling vaguely.
He looked suddenly uncomfortable, and a bit shocked, as if the idea hadn't occurred to him before. Shit. "Fuck," he murmured. "I might be, kiddo. I might be..."
Prompt: "I look at her and I just—I can't help it—it's like when the Grinch's heart grows three sizes."
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velvetcloxds · 11 months
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for a dialogue I don't know if you're still writing for twd but I just read love made me crazy and what about something after that where negan is out of jail and end up saving you when you're in danger or being the only one you ask for when getting hurt?
I WOULD CROSS THE LINE | N.S.
word count: 1.3k
warnings: villian becoming the hero for the person he loves- I couldn't control myself and turned it into a blurb and yes I'm always ready to write for twd- a brief moment where zombies try to eat you but it’s very quick and totally undetailed- ohh also age gap
part one: love made me crazy
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It happened too fast, you were always aware when outside the gate, more so after convincing everyone to let Negan come out searching for resources with you, just four of you scurrying about the woods for cans of food you'd never find. You'd never been one to volunteer, much more comfortable organizing things at home but you were losing your mind wondering about Negan in that little cell while were you on the other side with not even a second with him. These little trips were routine, always the same, a few stray walkers that were easy to take down, always finding nothing in the process but things got out of hand too quickly.
Stuck in a room with three walkers, no weapon, nothing but an overthrown cupboard separating you, and without even a second of consideration you called for Negan, pleaded for him and it was like a bolt of lightning struck right through his spine at the shrill sound. He'd never cleared a house so fast, not a care in the world for who was behind him, yelling at him for not staying close, he'd found a knife along the way and the zombies grabbing at you were gone within seconds.
"Y/n," you didn't register the sound, kneeled against the wall, shaking despite your best attempt at staying calm, blood on your clothes and you weren't sure it was truly over. Negan was slow when he moved the wooden frame away, it wasn't an easy task with the dead weight slumped against it, but he wasn't thinking, not a thought going through his mind other than getting you into his arms. "Baby," the gentle tone made you snap back to reality, tremored hands reaching for him before you could register the gesture. "I've got you," he promised and he bit back a surprised puff of air when you launched at him, taking him with you to the ground in the process, holding him impossibly tight as you lingered in his lap.
"You came," you mumbled into his neck, he was cooing softly, hand bushing up and down your back, your arms circling around his neck as you fought against any possibility that he'd let go.- he kissed the side of your head as a promise that he wouldn’t. "You saved me."
"Course I did,” he couldn’t believe your surprise, not that he came, it was more than that, it was revealing a weakness which was something he’d never dreamed of doing, letting people know there was something to hold over him and he couldn’t care less. “Baby,” the word felt foreign a second time, it was deliberate, laced with so many consequences and hidden meanings but he wanted to say it again, a thousand times just to taste it on his tongue. “You okay?” you were, he’d checked before you were in his arms, he had a fleeting moment to do so but the blood wasn’t yours and the scratches weren’t made by the dead, just from the struggle of trying to get safe.
“You saved me,” you pulled away, looking him over, you’d never seen that look before, the concern, the relief at looking at you, you’d always been the one to fuss over getting him an extra blanket or saving him some of your food so he stayed healthy, made sure no one too bad gets put on guard at his cell. He had his moments too though, and would worry about you being on the night shift, or dealing with some idiots letting their egos get in the way but at least you weren’t alone, there was someone to step in if you needed it, someone to keep you safe since he couldn’t. So seeing you like this, scared and seconds away from disaster, made something in him shift. A realization maybe, he was being reckless with you, putting your safety in someone else’s hands when they were more bothered keeping a gun on him than saving you from danger.
“You scared me,” his tone was soft, dipped brows over darkened eyes, the weight of the world drawn black in his irises and you hated being responsible for that. He’d grown hard before you, numb to such senseless emotions like fear and you didn’t want to be the reason he felt it again. You’d wondered if he’d be able to feel, truly feel, what you felt for him yet somehow knowing he could felt worse than thinking he couldn’t. “When I heard you screaming...” he shook his head, cupped your cheeks in his own shaking hands and your fingers were desperate when surrounding his wrists. “Haven’t felt that terrified in so damn long,” his hands fell to your neck, thumbs brushing hair away from the back of your ear.
“I’m sorry,” you didn’t have to apologise, he’d tell you as much soon so you interrupted his thoughts, nodding, pleading for forgiveness. “I didn’t mean to do that, I didn’t mean for any of this,” you didn’t mean to fall for him is what you didn’t say, he heard it even though you didn’t. “Of all the people, it had to be you,” you rested your forehead against his, he sighed, you bit your lip, if only words could describe it, if only the moment could last forever.
“Negan! Y/n!”, Carol’s voice was like a shock to the system, robbing you of your peace, forcing you right back into reality and after the gentlest, purest little kiss placed to you cheek, Negan jumped back, hands in the air in surrender as he stood up.
“In here!” he didn’t look away, gaze stuck on you, taking you in just one more time, making sure, slightly pleased with himself to see your breathing has evened out. “I’m going to change for you,” he promised and you swore your heart stopped, his hands now at the back of his head as if he was preparing to be cuffed. “I’m going to be better, baby, you deserve better,” he shook his head, agreeing with his words, his heart. “Please give me a chance to earn your heart?” you never thought you’d hear him beg, plead for you, your heart something he’s had for longer than you’d ever admit.
“You already have it,” you nearly whispered, footsteps coming closer. “You don’t have to earn it, .”
“Then give me a chance to deserve it, let me be good for you.”
Carol had her gun pointed at him as soon as she came into the room, too busy with him to even take in the dead zombies at your feet or the blood on your clothes, biased, priorities in place. Your priorities were far too different, flinching as she pointed the gun at his head while forcing his hands behind his back.
“He saved my life,” you blurted and the softness in his face was enough to give you whiplash, so different from how he’d looked at her, you were trying to make him human again, to them at least and it was almost as if he was pitying you for having to try so hard. “Carol, he saved my life.”
“I don’t care,” she bit back and your soul ached. “He’s still a monster.”
He’s not, not to you, a monster wouldn’t be kind to you, save you, a monster couldn’t make you fall in love with him. Maybe he was a monster once, maybe he’d changed, maybe he just allowed himself a little too much humanity with you and it ruined everything. You did love him despite all logical reasons, but you did also wish he’d change, not just for you, but for him too, for everyone.
There wasn’t a line he wouldn’t cross for power, maybe this line he’d cross for you, for weakness.
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quicksilversg1rl · 11 months
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screaming into my pillow rn!
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eufezco · 6 months
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this is me every time i see a new post under the negan tags
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tupperwaretub · 12 days
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A male reader who's super cautious around people because their queer identity has been an issue in the past, and so Negan being so explicit and flirty all the time just relentlessly getting on their nerves, and Negan just find it's so funny until he starts to realize how genuine the annoyance is, and just being like. Dude why would you EVER care about what other people think when we all know these people are horrible, and they're wrong about EVERYTHING Else, so they're wrong about you. And then they kiss 😈 (is this too cringe am i cringe bro)
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(A/n): TYSMMM for the request, this is so cute!! ALSO PLEASE KEEP SENDING REQUESTS ANYONE!! I'll write almost anything as long as it's not noncon or fetish. If you're unsure just look at my character list I'll link a list of what i will + wont write for
(Warnings): snarky Negan being himself, harsh language (it's negan duh)
(Summary): Before Negan arrived it was really easy to hide your sexuality, but when he went snooping and found old photos with your ex boyfriend he obviously couldn't keep his mouth shut but it definitely went better than you can expected.
....
You hid your sexuality even before you got to Alexandria but getting to Alexandria didn't help, the way the older folk looked at Aaron and Eric made you want to curl up and wither away. So you hid yourself, you hid your family pictures, you hid your pictures of friends at pride events and your ex boyfriend in fear of them finding out and shunning you. In your dream world you'd have your family pictures around your house in Alexandria, being able to see the faces of loved ones you'd lost and reminisce on a time before the outbreak but sacrifices have to be made in the new world.
When Negan started showing up you'd only just managed to settle in Alexandria, a lot of those who may of judged you had died and your group from before such as Rick pretty much ran the show around Alexandria now. You weren't at the line up and you hadn't seen Negan kill Abraham or Glenn, you didn't know Abraham well but he seemed nice enough although you never got too close due to an itching bad feeling he was homophobic. Glenn on the other hand you got on with well, being around the same age you both instinctively became close and you'd even considered telling him you were gay but in the end you decided not to, you had known how bad he was at keeping secrets since Hershel's farm when he told Dale about Loris pregnancy and the Hershel families secret zombie collection in the Barn. You feel slightly guilty for not telling him now he's gone though, he would've always had your back.
Less than a week later Negan came banging on the gate, you were counting ammunition and had noticed missing guns but decided it would be best to stay quiet right now. He sends his men to strip peoples houses of mattresses and items he decided he wanted, you're suddenly struck with a horrid feeling of nausea knowing your photos are hidden under your mattress so you run off back to the armory to pretend to check stock.
Around your fourth time checking the stock of guns and ammo Negan bursts in, "Well hey there... Y/n?" You nod. "I believe these are yours sweetheart." He hands you your photos and you swallow hard, you can't tell if you're about to cry or scream. "Don't worry i won't tell a soul, I'm not as bad as prick makes me out to be I wouldn't out someone. Well, assuming you're not out by the way all these photos were hidden under your mattress." You hide the photos in your back pocket and shrug. "I had my men leave your mattress there and maybe we could... You know, in return for my selflessness." He gets close to your face and smirks but backe off when his men enter and you hand them the lists of stock.
The next few time's Negan visits he flirts with you relentlessly, subtle to obvious.
When you saw him walking through the gates this time you sighed knowing it'd just be another day of annoyance, he walks straight up to you and smirks, "hey handsome..." You glare at him.
"Lighten up hon' you don't like a man like me being interested in you?" He laughs to himself and you just look away, almost seething with anger but holding back for Rick's sake. Negan sees your anger and his face shows how hard realisation hit him that you were genuinely annoyed with him and not just playing hard to get.
"Look, you don't have to act all macho to make people think you're not gay. Plus, i don't understand why you're even bothered about people knowing! It's the end of the damn world, laws don't exist anymore if you didn't realise, so if someone makes your life hard over your sexuality do what i do, bash some skulls in." Your eyes soften, while he doesn't exactly have a way with words you do understand his point. "I'm not like you." You respond to him with an ounce of bitterness but he smiles, "no you're not, but you get what I'm gettin' at." His hand brushes yours and you finally look up at him and your eyes lock. "Yeah... Yeah i guess you're right." You mutter and he smiles, his face gets a bit closer to yours. "Loosen up and have a bit of fun doll."
Your lips meet, at first you're unsure and think about pushing him away but his words ring in your head "loosen up and have a little fun" So you pull him closer and the pair of you share a passionate kiss.
Wherever this is going to go, you're sure it'll upset people but you've decided that if you're going to live in a world where you could die any day you'd rather die happy than moping and hiding yourself from others.
..............
(A/n): I hope you liked it! I loved the request, sorry it took so long I've got ridiculous amounts of work to get done so squeezed this in as much as possible!
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oceans-goddess · 4 months
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Negan x reader pt. 1
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Author's note: Guys, I'm sorry, this is so shit. All I've written lately are papers for class, so I just wrote this to get the creative juices flowing. I know its not much, but PART 2 IS COMING AND IT WILL BE FLUFFIER DON'T WORRY!!! Trust the process🙏🙏🙏🙏. I'm planning on having this be a multi-part story because I've been fucking obsessed w this man lately like fucckkkkkk just LOOK AT HIM ARGH anyways let me know if you wanna be in the taglist😘😘
Summary: Female!reader is on her own until she comes across Negan and his men on a supply run.
Warnings: mentions of death, panic attack
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Making it this far was pure luck. When the walkers came, I’d been lucky enough to have a father who’d been in the military and could teach me how to shoot. When we had to leave home and live life out on the road, constantly searching for cans of old food, I’d been lucky enough to always come across something to eat. When it got cold, we got lucky enough to find houses with fireplaces and enough firewood to last us the night.
I guess my luck ran out a month ago when a walker fell out of a closet and latched onto my dad’s throat while we were scoping out another house to stay in.
Since then, I’ve been on my own, running out of bullets, out of gas, out of hope. But I had to keep going. He’d been so sure that we would find others. Survivors. People who could help us. I had to find them– to know that his hope wasn’t for nothing. He’d kept a map with him, and we had been driving in a circular pattern, the center being our house in southern Virginia, looking for evidence of a settlement.
So here I was, staying in the master bedroom of a quaint house with a well-stocked pantry, planning out my next steps– with every closet checked, of course. I was plotting out the highway exit I would take tomorrow when I suddenly heard an engine.
A car engine.
People.
I hurried over to the window and peaked through the blinds. Surprisingly, the people in the trucks and vans stopped just a few houses down from the one I was in. Why didn’t they continue on?
Several men climbed out of a large truck– and all of them were equipped with massive guns. I knew that they were likely for walkers, but the sneers on their faces were unnerving. I watched to see what they would do.
Then, a man with a black leather jacket and a barbed bat hopped out of the cab of another truck and began ordering the men in different directions with a wild smile plastered across his face. Anxiety grew in the pit of my stomach.
After a few minutes, his men came back out of the houses nearest to the trucks with arms full of soup cans and furniture. When they were done, he ordered them to continue on in other houses, pointing directly at the one I was in.
My father might’ve been right– there were other people out there– but I never really considered that they might not want to help me. That they might not want me to join them. Not to mention I hadn’t seen a single woman come out of any car...
I needed to get out before they got here.
I dropped to the floor, grabbed my things as quickly as I could, and shoved them into my pack, but before I could stand, there was a bang from downstairs. I heard men speaking, laughing.
My heart racing, I pulled the closet door open as quietly as I could and slipped inside, listening for a moment before I realized where I stood.
I was standing inside a closet, waiting for someone to finish searching the house.
Images of my father bleeding out on the floor surged into my mind. I gagged as I remembered the foul smell that billowed out of that closet when it opened just moments before I lost him. I remembered his screams, and my hands shaking as I shoved a knife through its skull. And then through his when he died.
Tears streamed down my face, and I covered my mouth, choking back sobs. They couldn’t find me. They couldn’t. I could tell these men wouldn’t allow anything to take them by surprise like my father had. They would shoot first, ask questions later.
I heard footsteps as a few men clomped up the stairs. More tears fell. All I could think of were their guns, and my father’s blood; their knives, and him lying there on the floor.
* * *
“It’s a girl, sir.”
Negan raised a brow.
“A girl? In the house? Alive?”
“Yes, sir. She was hiding in a closet upstairs, crying.” The leader of the Saviors hummed in reply, and stood thinking for a moment.
“Should I… should I bring her out here?” his subordinate asked. He only waved a hand in response and walked toward the house.
Inside, men looked at him with wide eyes and confused expressions. One man-- Nicholas, he believed his name was-- walked up to him and explained that the girl wouldn’t move from the closet floor.
Upon reaching the master bedroom, more of his men bombarded him with dimwitted statements.
“Sir, she won’t move."
“She just keeps crying.”
“Alright, alright, guys. Honestly, it is just a girl. I’m sure you’ve seen one before, so fucking relax,” he said with exasperation in his voice. He stopped when he heard a sniffle from the closet, then walked over and peered inside.
Though Negan wasn’t known for his big heart, he was sure his broke a little when he saw the young woman that sat before him. 
* * *
“All of you, out. Now.”
That was all the man in the leather jacket had to say for the room to become empty again, save for the two of us. I was still on the floor, my chest heaving, my hands shaking.
The man squatted in front of me, bat in hand. It was chipped and cracked in several spots, especially at the head. In the blemishes, I swore I saw faint splotches of red. I thought I would vomit.
“Hey there, sweetheart,” he said, in a voice that sounded as if he was speaking to a cornered animal. In a way, I suppose, he was.
“Are you alright? Why are you crying? You hurt?”
I inhaled, meaning to respond, but all I could manage was another weak cry.
The man cocked his head to the side a bit, then looked down at the bat in his hand, realizing what was the matter. He tossed it behind him onto the bed, then turned back to me and raised his hands and continued.
“Sorry about that. Sometimes I forget I’ve even got her in my hands... I’m Negan. What’s your name, doll?”
With the bat out of sight, it was a bit easier to concentrate on his hands, his face. Though he looked quite rugged, with a shaggy beard and thick eyebrows, his brown eyes were soft, inviting.
“Y/n,” I whispered after a moment. My voice was hoarse, and I let out a cough. He sat down fully on the ground and crossed his legs.
“I’m sorry, can you say that one more time? I didn’t quite catch it.”
“Sorry… It’s-- it's Y/n,” I repeated, wringing my hands together as I spoke. He smiled.
“Y/n. What a beautiful name. It suits you, it really does. Look, I’m sorry we scared you, sweetheart. Is this your house? We didn’t know anyone was here when we came in.”
I shook my head.
“No, this isn’t my house. I was just passing through.” The man, Negan, nodded.
“Are you by yourself, honey?”
I hesitated. He put his hands up again.
“I promise, we don’t wanna hurt you. We were just lookin’ for supplies to take back with us.” My eyes widened as I recalled what I had been thinking when Negan’s trucks first arrived on the street. This could be my chance to escape the world my father hadn’t been able to. This is what he would have wanted for me, I knew it.
“I… yes, I’m alone. I have been for a while now.” A short whistle sounded from Negan’s lips. 
“You’ve been surviving out here all on your own? That’s fucking badass, I hope you know that.”
I smiled shyly, looking down at my lap and sniffling.
“Hey, have you eaten in a while?” he asked. “We’ve got a few sandwiches, apples, some sodas, down in one of the trucks. I’m sure we could spare some for you if you’re hungry.”
“I don't wanna take your lunch–”
“Aw, don’t worry about it, doll. There’s plenty extra. But I appreciate you bein’ so considerate,” he explained, finishing with a smile. He must’ve known he was making progress with me. I wiped my eyes a bit.
“C’mon, let’s go grab you something to eat,” he said, standing up and holding his large hand out to me. Looking up at him from where I sat, I could imagine how meek I must’ve looked– how embarrassingly harmless. But looking up at him stirred something in me. His confident half-smile, his slicked back hair-- his entire persona was so charming, so comforting.
I grabbed his hand, and he pulled me up with ease before grabbing his bat and leading me downstairs.
* * *
“You feel like having another?” Negan asked as I finished my second peanut butter and jelly. We sat in the dusty cab of the truck he’d come in, and he tapped his fingers rhythmically on the steering wheel while watching me eat. I shook my head.
“No, I’m okay, thanks,” I responded. The bed of the truck shifted up and down as men piled boxes of supplies into it. If they needed this much stuff, I thought, there had to be a ton of people where they came from that were planning to use it. With that in mind, I cleared my throat to ask the question I’d been gathering the guts to ask since I’d sat down.
“Negan,” I began, and he hummed. “Can I ask you something?”
“You can ask me anything you want, honey,” he said, a smile spreading across his face. I blushed and looked away, then carried on.
“You said you were taking the supplies back with you…”
“Mmhmm,” he grunted, gently urging me to continue.
“Back to where, exactly?” I whispered. He twisted to face me more in his seat.
“We’ve got sort of a compound set up,” he explained. “It’s not too far from here. It’s got fences, walls. Lots of people, and plenty more food to go around.”
All this time, my father had been right, and then some. People weren’t just surviving out here in this world– they were thriving.
“Do you… have any extra space?”
Negan laughed heartily.
“For you, doll? Abso-friggin-lutely.”
I nodded.
“So I can… I can come back with you?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
“I’d love to have you come back with us, y/n. Can’t leave a pretty thing like you with them ugly sons of bitches, now can I? You’d be much more protected there than you are here, I can tell you that.”
* * *
About an hour later, Negan sent a grumbling Dwight to find a new seat in another truck and was driving back to the compound with y/n in the passenger seat.
She was a cute little thing, he’d decided, and he’d been watching her shamelessly since he’d brought her outside. Her teary, guarded eyes, her cute little pout, everything about her was fucking adorable.
Although, he was also amazed at how long she’d held up out here. People like her, people who hid and cried instead of standing and fighting, those people were pretty much gone by now. How had she made it this far?
He struck up a polite conversation, asking questions here and there. There had to be some explanation for how she’d survived for all this time. After a few minutes, though, it was clear that the questions were making her nervous. His curiosity about her was eating away at him as he drove– he was used to getting answers faster than this. But he supposed he could wait this time.
The sweet girl beside him sat silently for the rest of the drive, and though the questions piled up in his mind, Negan was smiling.
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thewritersaddictions · 9 months
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Drabbles: Negan Smith- Chocolate Addict
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Going out with Negan was a rare occurrence. It was normally once a month if not twice. But not much more then that most months.
They were the equivalent to a monthly date. Just the two of us to be around each other. Sure Negan had other more important things to do. Sure Negan had his wives, but nothing was better then spending time with me
His words not mine.
With each outing Negan would declare something that he just had to find. For the past few years Negan had been talking about how much he missed particular things from before the world filled with raiders, zombies, and assholes. "I was really thinking about that good kind of Mac and cheese. You know the one I’m talking about Y/n." Negan mumbled as we would walk into another abandoned building or house in half-assed desperate search of supplied and such.
The list was an ever growing one changing almost every single time we would venture out by ourselves.one time it had been about the luxury of soft, brand new pillows the memory foam ones. "They just make you sleep the best." Negan would huff as we passed by another set of abandoned homes. "I could really use a new cycle of cooks for my shelve back home." Negan had become an avid reader. Raised brows would catch his eye. "Oh don’t play coy with me Y/n I know you’re in search for the second part of that romantic book you sometimes read at night next to me in bed." I’d roll my eyes and continue the search for yes supplied but also that second book.
Of course he also always never without a doubt complained about not have a pack of cigarettes. Not those were easy to find either. So scavenging we went.
Lucille hanging over his shoulder and a handy shotgun as my side gave us some leeway for walking about just the two of us.
That's when Negan started rambling on about the thing he was in search for today. "I was thinking I haven't had a good bite of ice cream in a long while now." Negan said as we contiuned to walk. "Oh Ice cream was what you were thinking about last night?" I ask him with one brow raised. Teasing him ever so slighty. "And other things babygirl other things." He said sweetly before grabbing me and pulling me close to his side.
"Are you still in search for those other things you've been talking about?" I whisper to him. He nods as we come up on a new section of strip mall we haven't searched before. A gas station sits in front. Negan takes the lead, and I follow close behind. Negan is careful managing to make sure there aren't any zombies hanging around.
Oh FUCK yeah I found them. They've got like twenty left." Negan shouted rather stupidly. The sounds started automatically. The sweeping of feet on the dirty ground, and the sounds of garggling then the running of them towards me.
"NEGAN A LITTLE HELP HERE!" I shouted, I took a few shouts then grabbed onto my knife that was in my back pocket draperatly trying to grab one and kill itv before it killed me. Then the weight of the zombie was gone and his head was bashed in. I watched as Negan repeated his actions.
I stayed on the ground, my heartbeat in my ear and then I felt his hand on my arm. "Are you alright babe?" He asked worry inprinted on his features. I grabbed his hand and he helped me up. "Jesus christ, I don't think… I'm okay I think." I muttered mostyl to myself as I got myself steady on my feet.
From the corner of my eye I saw something. "What else were you looking for honey?" I asked my voice a little hoarse. Neganw as still staring at me. "Why don't we just take a moment and breath yeah?" Negan tried. I shook my head. "What else were you looking for?" I ask again. "I was thinking about chocolate recently, Why?" I shake my head and start to walk away from Negan.
He follows close behind me. "What are you up to babe?" He asks. "Well ice cream isn't really a thing you can find out in the wild, but you know what is?" I ask Negan as I grab at the left over chocolates. "What is?" He asks still very concerned.
"Chocolate Negan!" I giggled. I was smiling wide. "Holy fuckin' shit!" Negan muttered as he grabbed a bar from my hand and unwrapped it shoving it in his mouth. His eyes glew and he moaned around the piece. "Oh fuck! That's fuckin' wonderful." Negan said.
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Completed on: 06/12/23
Posted on: 08/08/23
The Wanderers-
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vilentia · 1 year
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Sweet Surrender
Negan Smith x reader
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Negan was always a man who knew what he wanted, and he wasn't afraid to take it. As the leader of the Saviors, he had an air of confidence and swagger that drew people to him, whether they liked it or not. And when he met you, he knew that he wanted you.
You were different than the other women he had encountered in the post-apocalyptic world. There was a strength and independence about you that he found irresistible. And though you resisted his advances at first, he was persistent in his pursuit.
He would find excuses to be near you, engaging you in conversation, trying to make you laugh. He would invite you to sit with him at meals, offering you the best of what the Sanctuary had to offer. And as much as you tried to resist, you found yourself drawn to him, unable to deny the attraction that simmered between you.
One night, as the two of you were alone in his room, he reached out and took your hand, pulling you closer to him. His eyes met yours, a smoldering intensity that sent shivers down your spine. And then his lips were on yours, fierce and demanding, taking what he wanted without apology.
You tried to pull away, to resist, but he was too strong, too determined. And slowly, you found yourself giving in to the heat that radiated from him, responding to his touch with equal fervor. He pressed you back onto the bed, his hands roaming over your body, igniting a fire that burned hot and bright.
It was as if he were pouring sugar on you, sweet and irresistible, and you couldn't get enough. And as the night wore on, you found yourself surrendering to him completely, swept away by the passion that consumed you both.
In the days that followed, you found yourself drawn back to him time and time again, unable to resist his magnetic pull. And though you knew that it was dangerous to be with him, that he was a man who demanded loyalty and obedience, you couldn't help but crave him.
For Negan, you were his sweetest addiction, the one thing that he couldn't get enough of. And as he held you in his arms, he knew that he would do anything to keep you by his side, no matter the cost.
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daryl-dixon-daydreams · 3 months
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"You know, Negan, I really wish you would give at least a little bit of a shit sometimes! I get your whole shitty backstory, blah blah blah... but if you could show the tiniest bit of loyalty that would be fuckin' great!" you snapped at him, charging forward through the brush.
"Loyalty? Hey—I'm still fuckin' here, aren't I? Why the hell do you think that is?"
You didn't say anything and you didn't look at him. The next moment you felt his hand on your arm and he spun you around to face him. He was hardly six inches from you. You'd almost been pulled straight into his body.
"That pretty little head of yours still hasn't figured it out yet?" His voice was deep and a little gruff, but you couldn't ignore the electric chill that swept through you. His hand was still on your arm.
You felt your heart and breathing quicken on their own. "Let go," you said, surprised at how weak your voice sounded. It made Negan smile.
"I will. If you say it like you mean it," he retorted.
You tugged your arm from his grasp and turned quickly to hide the flush in your face.
Prompt: "If you could show the tiniest bit of loyalty that would be great!" / "Loyalty? I'm still here, aren't I?" Happy Wicked Wednesday!
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rickgrimesfever · 6 months
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Negan Smith Headcanons
Synopsis: Negan Smith headcanons, SFW and NSFW. Negan Smith x female reader.
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SFW:
His favorite nickname for you is doll.
Most definitely has a soft spot for you.
Negan is an absolute tease and will tease you for just about anything. The way you look at him, talk, or even walk.
In private, he can be a big teddy bear.
When you need comfort, Negan's there with open arms and a chest to rest your head on.
He'll comb his fingers through your hair and whisper sweet words that make your body tingle.
Obviously, he's very possessive of you.
You're always by his side, an arm snaked around your waist and a hand resting on your back.
He hates putting you in danger or letting you see the bad side of him, so he demands that you stay in your shared room.
If one of the Saviors even looks at you wrong, they are severely punished or even killed sometimes.
Negan only has a sweet spot for you and it warms your heart.
His kisses are rough and passionate.
His hands are grabbing at your hips, his beard tickling your face.
He'll never admit to himself that he's in love with you, not until you face a near death experience at least.
You can convince Negan to have mercy and only you can do it.
He trusts you and will explain all of his plans to you, hoping to impress you even just a little bit.
NSFW:
Be prepared for the best sex of your life.
Negan likes to crack jokes during the act to make you more comfortable.
He's actually very sweet during sex as he's pounding into you from behind.
Negan likes to be rough with you, but will always stop and tone it down if you ask.
There are times when he's had a bad time and dirty things are spewing from his mouth.
He'll degrade you and even slap your ass, earning a whimper from you.
Negan's eyes roll into the back of his head when you get down on his knees and start sucking on his cock.
He definitely grabs your head and bucks his hips, shoving his cock deeper into your mouth.
He'll say how pretty you look with your lips wrapped around his length.
He loves to overstimulate you, seeing how many times he can make you cum in a row.
Negan loves doggy and watching your ass jiggle as he thrusts into your sore pussy.
He's also really into choking, knowing that he has control over your pulse.
You definitely have to come up with a safe word though.
He's surprisingly good at aftercare.
He will bring you a glass of water after and makes sure you drink it.
He makes sure you're okay and will massage your sore thighs.
Negan will rub your back and sit with you until you fall asleep.
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quicksilversg1rl · 1 year
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I’m ripping my hair out I want him so bad this isn’t funny
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moonxnite · 1 year
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Im sorry this TOOK ME OUT
Ngl if i saw a walker with some nice ass clothes I’m definitely gonna steal like BYE IDC 😭✋🏼✋🏼
Credits: natalie on pinterest
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tupperwaretub · 20 days
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could you do a negan x m!reader fic? mainly fluff and possibly an established relationship between the reader and negan. also, maybe an alternate universe with no apocalypse? :)
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(A/n): tysm for the request, I'm a bit rusty so apologies for any bad writing!
Summary: it's you and are boyfriends one year anniversary and you have a cozy dinner to celebrate.
Warnings: light reference to smut at end, that's it :)
....
You sigh as you finally get home from work, you had stopped at the shop on the way home to buy your boyfriend Negan some chocolates it was your one year anniversary after all. As you step inside your senses are filled by the delicious scent of your boyfriends famous spaghetti, you hear him call from the kitchen "sit down at the table babe!" Negan sounds excited.
You sit at the candle lit table and he enters the room with two plates of spaghetti and your favorite bottle of wine. Negan flashes you a stupid grin and pours you both a glass of the wine, "so how was your day?" He kisses your cheek. "Definitely better now." You laugh, you pass him the box of chocolates over the table once he sits down and he smiles, "thankyou love..." He places the box down and holds your hand gently. You speak up "I'm not sure if the chocolates are good enough seeing as you've done all this-" Negan cuts you off laughing, "you can be silly sometimes y/n... I love it thank you, really I'm just doing this because... Well, you know how much of a hopeless romantic i am." You both laugh.
"So how was your day?" You ask him as you both start to eat the delicious meal. "My day?" He begins to answer, "well... You know how those little shits can be, tiring but i love 'em." He grins, your heart warms at your boyfriends love for his students.
The pair of you eat in a comfortable silence and when you finish Negan blows the candles out and offers you his hand, you raise an eye brow and take it. He leads you to the living room where he places a CD in the CD player, the CD he had burnt your own little shared mix of favourite songs and 'you are so beautiful to me' by Joe Cocker begins to play.
Negan takes you into his arms and kisses you softly as you both sway to the song, "I love you Negan..." You whisper, he squeezes your shoulder, "I love you to y/n."
Even as the song ends the pair of you stay in each other's arms, kissing each other softly and whispering loving words.
Soon your kisses become more passionate and Negan picks you up causing you to both laugh, he carries you upstairs. Neither of you could've asked for a better anniversary.
....
(A/n): this felt a bit rushed but again I'm a bit rusty! So thank you for the request and i hope you liked it :)
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laangdonn · 4 months
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not anymore
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summary: the aftermath of glenn and abraham leaves carl and y/n’s relationship in shambles.
pairing: carl grimes x female reader
a/n: first carl grimes post yayy, i love him so much and in my mind he lives on.
*read part 2 here*
*************************
the house was quiet minus the occasional sniffle from carl and i. he was sat with his head in his hands on the leather sofa, his fingers lightly gripping his brown curls. i watched him carefully through blurry vision from behind the kitchen counter, supporting myself with my hands on the cold marble.
it was dark, the moon and a single saucer light in the kitchen shining as light.
it was so fucking quiet but my head had never been louder.
“so what are you saying?” i whispered, carefully watching my words.
he lifted his eyes for a moment until he brought his head back into his palms. he refused eye contact. “i don’t know what i’m saying.”
“you don’t love me anymore?” every word i spoke sent my stomach falling into my feet.
he didn’t answer. i didn’t know if that made it better or worse.
“jesus, carl, answer me-“
“i still love you,” he finally responded, his hand rubbing his face in stress. “of course i still love you.”
“then what’s wrong?” i pressed, a sudden urgency filling my veins. “why are we even having this conversation? why did you come home and suddenly act as if we’ve been fighting for weeks-“
“cause we have been, y/n!” his voice picked up now, throwing his hands in the air and standing up. he still hadn’t looked at me. “we have been fighting for weeks! we cant even look at each other without fighting! ever since glenn-“
“stop.” i cut him off, feeling my chest clench. “this wasn’t them, it wasn’t.”
but it was, and i knew it. the aftermath of glenn and abraham put a strain on the whole group, especially me and carl. we came home that morning, stumbling out of the RV and hadn’t been the same since. every time i looked at carl, all i saw were the tears streaming down his face and the reflection of glenn’s bloody skull in his eyes. i saw the black line drawn on carl’s left arm, and the axe raised in the air.
i looked at carl and i saw death.
i knew he felt the same.
“that day…” he started, taking a breath. “that day i had no other wish but to die. to keep you safe if that’s what it took. i couldn’t protect you from him and i don’t know if i can even try. i put you in danger by loving you.”
i shuddered a breath as the tears began to
clog my throat.
“that’s why i can’t love you, y/n. not anymore.”
“you act like that’s a choice you can make.” i choked out, a feeling of anger pushing forward. anger at the way he thought he could fool anyone who knew him.
“i can try.”
“BULLSHIT!” i snapped, slamming my hand against the cold counter and feeling it sting.
he buried his face in his hands and i could see his shoulders shaking. i felt my heart break then, knowing i wouldn’t be able to change his mind.
a sob broke its way through my throat, wet and rough, and i instantly regretted it because carl looked straight at my eyes and i felt myself sink deeper into the ground.
“don’t do this, carl…” i whispered, looking into his crystal blue eyes, a raging ocean encased in this beautiful human who i’d have to let go. i shook my head at him slowly.
“i’m going to get you killed,”
“then let me be killed knowing you loved me! isn’t that the best we can do?!”
“the best i can do is keep you alive.” he countered strongly. his voice was no longer broken or shaken, but determined.
i realized in that moment nothing could be done to change his mind, it had already been made up. carl was stubborn, too stubborn for his own good and he’d never be swayed by anyone, even me.
no words were spoken between us as we stared at the floor, drowning in the absence of each other. all i wanted in that moment was to touch him, to feel him under my skin and prove to me that he’s still real and he’s still here after everything that had happened. but he was taking that away from me and ripping my heart out along with it.
he inhaled a sharp breath, rubbing his hand on his face once more before he said, “it’d be best if you went to carol’s tonight.”
i swallowed harshly, nodding. at least he was right about one thing.
too tired to argue further, i walked past him and to the front door. he kept his head bowed, not looking at me. i could sense the tension as i barely grazed his shoulder, walking so fast i barely registered the soft material of his flannel on my skin. i paused in front of the door, gripping the handle and hoping he’d call out my name and beg me to stay.
but he didn’t. and i turned around to see his eyes were still trained on the floor, back turned. i felt the cold air envelop me and i slammed the door shut, reverberating and practically shaking the house. i sucked in a breath and pushed forward to the blue house a few doors down.
i knocked wearily, feeling my knees begin to wobble as the effects of what had just transpired hit me. suddenly i was a mess on the porch, breathing erratically as i tried to process what just happened. but, when i saw carols face when she opened the door, concerned at my state of being, i lost it.
she carried me into the house and let me sob my way through the story. she held me while i cried and laid me down once i had fallen asleep in her grasp, eyes crusted shut with tried tears, cheeks red, and lips swollen.
i dreamt that night of glenn.
———
in the morning i woke to the smell of toast and eggs. my stomach growled harshly and i realized i hadn’t eaten since yesterday afternoon.
i gripped the banister on my way downstairs, being created with carol’s sympathetic smile. i sat down on the island counter as she pushed a plate of breakfast in front of me.
“i’m leaving for hilltop today.” i announced suddenly. her back was turned to me but i could sense the blank stare that must’ve washed over her. the sizzle of the pan of eggs on the stove top was the only sound heard for a moment.
then, she continued tussling the eggs in the pan, continuing on as if i hadn’t said anything. “it’s dangerous.”
“maggie needs me.” i answered simply.
“she’d feel much better if you stayed here. safe, with rick.”
i took a small bite of my toast, “she knows i can take care of myself. i should’ve gone with her and sasha right after…” i let my voice drift on, knowing i didn’t have to be specific. “i need to do this for her. for me. i cant stay here, carol, i can’t. not anymore.”
carol turned around at that, pouring her own eggs onto a plate. “well, i’m not going to stop you.” she said, taking a bite, “but i don’t think you should go alone.”
“i don’t need a babysitter,” i mumbled, beginning to lose my appetite. “im going by myself and that’s final.”
———
i opened the front door to the grimes’ home we shared cautiously. i anticipated to see carl in the front room with judith, as he always was, but to my surprise it was rick instead.
he was sat on the couch while judith babbled and played on the floor. his eyes were tired and lost, his face sunken with grief. he turned to look at me walking in and gave me the same, sympathetic smile i had gotten from carol.
i stood awkwardly in front of the door, looking anywhere but his eyes.
“he told you didn’t he.” i mumbled, not even being able to bring myself to say his name.
“no,” his voice was rough as he spoke, “i heard him last night crying in his room, after you’d left. and i knew.”
i felt my heart clench and my nose begin to sting. i nodded slowly, knowing i wouldn’t be able to choke out words i so desperately wanted to say.
“im going to hilltop today. only carol knows. i came to grab my stuff.”
his eyebrows furrowed at me and once i saw the disapproving look i spoke fast.
“i can make it there.” i promised, “we need each other.”
rick knew exactly who i was referring to and suddenly the look of disapproval vanished from his face. he nodded at me slowly, accepting the fact that this battle would be one he lost in trying to keep me here. he turned to judith and i took that as my cue to head upstairs.
“carl is at the armory, but he should be back soon,” i heard rick say, “i suggest you leave before he gets back, for both of your sakes.”
i didn’t answer, only continued up the steps. i didn’t want to see carl because i knew if he begged me to stay i would. it hurts knowing i perhaps don’t have that same control over him.
pushing open his door and revealing his room, our room was harder than i had imagined. i wanted to be out quickly, without hassle. i went through drawers, grabbing my things, stuffing them into the two duffel bags i had underneath our bed.
my heart dropped when i heard the front door open and close. i hadn’t been quick enough.
“where is she?” i heard his voice from downstairs and it motivated me to work quicker.
i managed to close the zipper on the second duffle bag but when i turned to the door i almost fainted. carl stood there with his arms hanging limp at his side, a blank stare on his face as he watched me pack my life away.
we stood facing each other for a long time. i stressed another fight, perhaps a bigger blowout than the last, but i looked into his sad, tired eyes and realized there wouldn’t be any fighting between us.
“how did you know i was here,” i mumbled.
“i went to carol’s looking for you. she told me you were leaving for hilltop.” his face scrunched up in disgust at his own words, as if just the thought of me leaving left a sour taste in his mouth.
“i am.” i said, voice feeble in an attempt to remain confident.
he shook his head slowly as tears began to rise up in his eyes. “don’t, y/n.”
“why not?” i pushed, crossing my arms over my chest. “why wouldn’t i leave? what’s left for me here?”
he didn’t answer.
“you let me go last night.” i stabilized my voice a bit, straightening my back to make myself look stronger as i spoke the words. “you can let me go again.”
“is that what this is?” he questioned, “is this reckless stupidity to punish me for last night?”
i scoffed, rolling his eyes at his narcissism. “no,” i chuckled in disbelief.
“then why? because this is the first time i’ve heard about this from you. not once have you said you’ve wanted to go to hilltop.”
“why wouldn’t i go?” i asked rhetorically, “maggie’s there and i want to help her. i feel so… so useless here! like, nothing is going right in this godforsaken place and last night was the last thing i needed to set me off.”
his face suddenly paled, his eyes softening. words were stuck on the edge of his tongue and i could see in his expression he contemplated letting them spill over. “i wanted to talk about last night.”
i turned around at that, beginning to rustle with my bag to occupy my hands. to do something other than hear him talk. especially about last night.
“i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to hurt you, you have no idea how hard it was for me, letting you go like that.”
i scoffed again, “you don’t even have a clue how i feel, carl, so don’t even try to sympathize with me.”
“i-“
“save it.” i spat, anger beginning to rise up my veins at the idea that he was about to pity me. “nothing you can say, nothing you think you can do to make it okay won’t keep me from-“
a loud bang on the front door shook me from finishing my sentence, both our eyes widening as carl ran out of the room and to the stairs.
“anyone home?” a booming voice spoke. i knew that voice.
carl, eyes still wide, turned to me in shock. i stood frozen, my hand still clutching the strap of my duffel bag filled with things.
“aww, you are a cutie-pie aren’t you! where’s your mommy, huh?”
at that, my blood ran cold.
judith was downstairs, by herself, with him.
without another moment of hesitation, carl was booking it down the stairs. i closely followed; forgetting our fued and any other reason why i would be angry in the first place. judith came first.
when i got to the bottom of the stairs carl was already in a staring match with negan as he held judith in his burly arms. the sight almost made me vomit. if he was capable of all he did that night, what was stopping him from harming a baby?
“well would you look what we have here,” he smiled his wicked smile. “i remember you,” he said, pointing at me.
“give me the baby,” carl demanded, his eye narrow. i wouldn’t have wanted to be on the receiving end of his glare.
negan chuckled, “and why would i do that? she’s so precious, i don’t think i’ll ever let her go.”
i felt my eyes sting when he lifted her up higher, examining her small, angelic face with devil eyes.
“i’m not asking,” carl said confidently, his voice didn’t shake or tremble. surprisingly, he was calmer than me, and it was his sister. he kept his eyes trained on negan, never once allowing him to leave his hard gaze. “give her to me.”
negan looked between the two of us before letting out a large gasp, his eyes widening, “no fucking shit, pardon my french but, aren’t you two a little young…”
my cheeks flushed once i realized what he was implying. i slowly shook my head, staring at carl out of the corner of my eye. his eye narrowed further.
“that’s my sister.” he spat.
“this is rick’s baby girl?” negan bounced judith in his arms again, eliciting a small giggle from her. “wow! now it’s a grimes’ party!”
he eyed me up and down, “sweetheart,” he beckoned me to take the baby, and without question i stepped up, carefully taking her out of his grasp and into the safety of my arms. i let out a sigh of relief, smoothing her golden hair back.
i backed up to carl’s side again, keeping my arms strongly around judith’s small body. she twirled a strand of my brown hair around her stubby finger, giggling again.
ever so slightly, carl stepped in front of me, shielding judith and i from whatever this man could do.
“so, where’s rick?” negan asked as he began trodding around the room, picking up trinkets left in the house by the previous owners.
“not here,” carl answered stiffly. out of the corner of my eye, i saw his hand lightly graze over the top of his jeans. my heart pounded a little faster.
negan sighed disappointedly, “well, im gonna go look for him! in the meantime, a few of my men will be by here to collect half your shit for me to take! kapeesh?”
he walked over to me and patted judith’s back, getting sickenly close. i held my breath, attempting to shield my fear. “i’ll be back for you, sweetheart.”
a chill ran down my spine when judith giggled at the man’s words. it felt like i was holding that breath in all the way until the front door closed and i could breathe again.
suddenly, carl gripped my shoulders and forced me to face him. “take judith upstairs and stay there.”
boots crunching against gravel outside made my stomach drop, the sound getting closer as each second passed. i shook my head violently. “i’m not leaving you down here by yourself.”
“i’ll be fine, go upstairs. now!” he pushed me in the direction of the stairs, judith cooing. i suddenly felt the urge to tell him i loved him, to hold him and make sure he’s safe. i never wanted to leave his side.
i had barely made it up the stairs and out of sight by the time the men had opened the door and i heard carl already start with the spiteful comments. he’s gonna get himself killed.
i placed judith in her crib, cooing to her softly to make sure she was settled. i locked her door from the inside, stuffing the key in my back jean pocket and headed for the stairs. i peeked through the railings, watching carl argue with one of negan’s men while the other ransacked the kitchen.
“you said half!” carl growled, watching the men stuff cabinet after cabinet of food into a large bag.
“we’ll take as much as we want.” one of the men replied, his tone snark and condescending.
my eyes bulged when i saw carl turn around and raise his gun to the man in the kitchen. he cocked it, his finger edging the trigger. “put it back.”
at this, i ran downstairs to carl’s side, just in time for the man behind him to cock his gun, right at my head.
carl’s head turned, his face pale when he saw the cold metal pressed up against my head, and the man’s strong arm around my torso.
“put the gun down, kid.” the man with the gun to me demanded. carl didn’t budge.
“carl…” i whispered carefully, my heart thumping in my ears loud enough to the point where i could barely hear myself talk aloud. “put it down…”
he stood there for a moment, his hand holding the gun beginning to shake as his pupil turned into a devilish slit to the man threatening my life. after what felt like hours, he finally lowered the gun, and i let out a sigh of relief when the metal left my hair.
we watched in distraught as they picked apart every inch of our home. luckily, we were able to keep him from going upstairs, and they left without another word to either of us. as the front door slammed shut i was pulled harshly into carl’s arms, his whole body shaking in rage.
his grip was tight and constricting, as if the anger was flowing into the hug. i could barely get a breath out, and i felt him shakily let out a few of his own into my ear, his chin digging into the crevice between my neck and my shoulder.
i could feel his rage. it coursed through him like the blood in his veins. his brain pumped more thoughts of negan, his saviors, their wrath, and i felt him slip into his emotions.
“i love you,” he whispered, his voice harsh, embrace still solid.
a tear dropped onto the warm skin of my shoulder, and by then i knew, everything he had said to me last night was nothing but a mistake.
i nodded against him, “i know.”
———
the rest of the day he didn’t let go of me, refused to. we laid in bed and i realized he was still thinking of this mornings’ events.
rick had come back an hour after the saviors left and panicked, asking about judith and if we were okay. he saw carl practically in tears from anger on the couch and me coddling his fragile ego.
he told us to stay in the house the rest of the day, and he’d be back to salvage whatever food he could find for dinner after our kitchen became nothing but a hollow, empty shell.
laying on carl’s chest, i drew patterns onto the grey of his shirt. we laid in silence, comfortable yet uncomfortable silence, until he broke it.
“today,” he started, his voice low, “when he had his gun up to your head, i realized something.”
i lifted my head slightly to look at him, his eye trained on the wall in front of us.
“you were about to die without me saying i love you today.” he sucked in a sharp breath, “and- and i realized i couldn’t live with myself if that happened.”
he finally looked down to me, his eye glazed over, staring at my with a heartbreakingly beautiful gaze that told me everything i needed to know.
“carl-“
“if you still want to go to hilltop i wont stop you.” he continued, cutting me off, “but if they come there-“ his voice hitched, his chest tightening under me. “remember that even after what i said, i cant ever stop loving you, y/n.”
the tears that had been building in my eyes finally spilled over. i realized the extent of what we were all going through, what our reality is. that we don’t know if today is promised, more so than before we met the saviors. that humans are far more dangerous than any walker we’d ever come across.
we were all living on borrowed time, and at some point, we’d have to return it.
i buried my head in his warm chest and sobbed. sobbed for glenn, for abraham, for maggie, for judith, for me, for carl, for us together. i sobbed for what we’d never have again as far as it seemed.
safety.
“what are we gonna do,” the words tumbled out of my mouth deliriously, through snot and sobs.
he didn’t answer, but carl’s grip around me tightening, and the way his chest stuttered, answered for him when his throat had nothing to offer.
but then he spoke. low and menacing. he acquired a sort of vendetta he didn’t have the night prior. he wasn’t about to let me go for them. not anymore.
“we’re gonna make them pay.”
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