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iztea · 4 months

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How do you get the ideas for your backgrounds?

mmm ideas.... sometimes i draw the background directly from a photo reference (the happy case) so there's not a lot for me to change and i can have a rather peaceful painting process

othertimes, the BG is tied to the subject/concept/scene I'm thinking of, so it only makes sense that i have that as the background

for example, for this fem skk art, i knew i wanted to have chuu kneeling in a crater after destroying a city so drawing that background was just a logical follow-up because i already had the entire idea in mind

Here, I wanted to have Akiangel sit on a building, watching over the city. The ominous sign with "the day of salvation" and crow came later after I found this picture on Pinterest, so they helped further develop the concept, but the main idea was there and so on

The third background option happens when my painting doesn't depict a certain irl scene or landscape, nor do i have any particular references i can use. In that situation, I first and foremost think about the general composition, the shapes, how they flow with each other, how I can tie them to my main theme and what sort of symbolism or little easter eggs i can throw in there just to keep it fresh and interesting for the viewer ( aka the person reading this aha ;;) :-* )

For this piece, i started with a big circle for the background, and then I started breaking it up in pleasing, cloud-like shapes and swirls that constantly keep your eye moving around the picture (i mean hopefully lol). The composition was inspired by a) Dazai's Mayoi card ofc, that trad Eastern illustration style with the circle and then branches of trees, and also .. kazuha's splash art ok i admit it bshsj

for this one, the roses came much, much later. Again, I added that sort of golden arcade to better frame the focal point or the main subject of the scene which was ofc her face and/or outfit. Then, since it still felt rather empty, awkward, and directionless, I tried finding a pleasing, spiral line that would compliment the already existing shapes and that would, again, move your eye all around the composition. I figured since her outfit already had those small roses stuffed in her belt, those curvy lines could become some bloody, spikey roses and boom! here are the theme and elements for you: blacks-roses-blood-deadly-sharp-gold etc. I then had her crush some of those roses in her right (ik it's the left hand shut up) hand to balance out the busier left side

and a last example, sometimes I draw multiple character poses in one piece and they sort of become my background. Yet I still have some blank spaces left so i gotta figure out a way to fill them out. Here, since the pose where he's all curled up was inspired by the TDIPUD light novel, i drew him as a "corpse" in a pool of blood, and contrasted it with some nice flowery-ish patterns and swirls that sort of come from within that bloody mess ( someone also mentioned it looks like a womb which I found very interesting as well ). The cats also helped fill out the space. On the left side, i added that swirly black sun that drips into three squares that gradually fill up with straight blackness and raindrops falling below inspired by the "a conviction that the sun will never rise again" line. I don't think I should go into detail with the symbolism cause it's pretty obvious and not that deep so i won't but yeah, and that's my BG all filled up!

I do this with most of my BGs, it's mostly just abstract shapes; I'm very fixated on making the overall composition look okay and for the piece to send a message ( most of the time ), so i don't think of backgrounds as a separate entity, they are part of an already existing idea, generally speaking.

This kinda turned into a composition discussion midway......... sorry about that....... To be completely honest with you, I have plenty of BG ideas, they kinda just spawn in my brain so i'm not exactly lacking in that department. Having to draw them and finding refs is the hard part for me

#long post #what's new #i genuinely enjoy talking about this so thanks for the question #i hope it helped?#bottom line is - direct refs - already existing ideas - abstract shapes and symbols that work well together #ask iztea #this is nothing new under the sun im aware it's just what i do

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erporo · 1 month

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SO. (some of) ARAN HCS

ive been cooking these up since FOREVER AND IVE ACCIDENTALLY DELETED THE ORIGINAL ASK BCS IM DUMBBB I'M SORRY @fan-mans

onto the hcs tho.. i haven't got much & new stuff so ur in luck:

so ik that one's pretty much canon? but. dude may seem insane on the ring but. you'd actually be surprised how mellow & chill he is outside of the ring

like in fact, in certain scenarioz? dude may be just as mellow as glass mfing joe

despite being a huge bastard, dude always knew how being lucky feels like. he doesn't know entirely why but he's proud of that & wears it like a cloak & will def shove that fact into ur face constantly

dude's got a ma and a sis. but he's pretty much never seen his father... prob because they're divorced or smth

dude's also a very very homey person 2 me. like he misses Dublin, his ma (he's a huge mama's boy yesss) there more than he cares to admit not only to others but also to himself.

he and his sis r also. v silly with each other. they def fight each other over things not worth fighting over on a daily basis

aran is a huge dog person:

there was this hc of him having an Irish Wolfhound? i think? from a while back. and like that changed my brain chemistry 4ever- these puppers are HUUGE YK

but I also adore the idea of him having a little pet rat, that only the closest of people and relatives know about :33

dude LOVES to draw- he doesn't give a crap about learning how to draw or developing his own style- hes in it purely for the enjoyment

he's also a huge motorcycle nerd methinks

dropkick murphys's one of his absolute favorite bands <3 i also imagine dude loves bands like pantera, black sabbath, slayer tho

arn's also. gay: demiromantic bisexual

dude's also rly into leather. in every sense :)

narcis's his pookie bear <3 4ever & ever

& soda is his only friendo among all his colleagues. they're great drinking buddies- they just love to get absolutely wasted on fridays or something (w/ narcis too, also chiming in from time to time). id imagine it's one of the only reasons why arn looks forward to the end of every single week too

but their friendship goes beyond just being drinking buds- like soda understands like. 0.1% of english <- that's me being generous. & arn doesn't understand a lick of russian. yet they perfectly understand each other

#i may or may not have projected a bit too hard here.#que #punch out #aran ryan #hcs

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marbarmars-arts · 1 year

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So...I MAY have been collecting Fawfuls like pokemon cards <3

(and what the heck do I mean by that exactly??) WELL in a discord GC my friend Parmy suggested we’d imitate each other’s art styles as like a collab of sorts? Well...I kinda took that a step further heheh ^^

(And fun fact...this was supposed to be something I was gonna do for AU day of Fawful month too, but that idea got cut due to time)

So may I present...the different Fawfuls I drew!! For my friends/cool acquaintances!

So the one who led up to this in the first place, Fawful from @parmsnik AU!! He is dating/eventually marrying Naspi depending on where you’re at in the AU haha! Your way of drawing Fawful seems to change a little bit each time you draw him, so I tried to my best to guestimate a consistent looking Fawf! Very cute!

Up next is Fawful from @the-spacewaffle AU!! Yippee Ronnie’s AU! Thanks for being my friend for so long,,to talk about Fawful and all that stuff y’know? I’ll be cheering you on to complete the story qwq your Fawful is always so nice to my OCs when we crossover khskdjh also...pet the Reddo!

Eee yay now it’s @snuffydoo Fawful and his AU title I totally made up on the spot! I know you don’t really have a name for that kind of thing and it doesn’t have to be canon but I hope you think it’s cute anyways haha! I had a lot of fun drawing this one!! It’s so stylized! AND IT HAS DIMMY (I enjoy your Dimmy artstyle sm) but I don’t draw Spamton very often kjhskgh

Here’s @federthenotsogreat Fawful AU of sunshine goodness~! HE RETURNITH (and since I couldn’t think of another character to feature with your AU...not knowing if Cackletta is there or not jhgskg I gave him a cute little swirly sun!) I admire the fact his outfit is mostly YELLOW and also blue those are cool colors OH AND THAT LEG TOO, also super cool :)

The smol and cute @omgtheywereroomates Fawf! Your ask blog is so neat! I know I don’t ask too many questions there but I just,,,the cartoony fluffy hair?? Love that, and also thank you for your support and the super cool ship as well ^^

Heheee yeah hey it’s @cammiluna Fawful from Immortal Fool! Before you say anything YES I’m aware he’s got the new design since it’s near the end of the comic, you released the page that featured said new design while I was already working on this drawing xD So whoops! I just wanted to give appreciation to your comic series that you continued despite everything, and well...I know I haven’t shown much progress on it, I also want to make a comic series...so you’ve inspired me a lil :D

Deep down here there’s a little AU by @aliencatwafers which features Fawful in the sewers! With the little baby bros!! You’re a very insightful and inspiring writer with plenty of neat headcanons and ideas for the bean! Ik you mostly draw in pencil but I took the colors from your submissions to Fawful month this year and used em here! Hope it looks cool!

This little gremlin here with the two moms is Fawful from @bean-n-shroob ask blog! He looks very silly and unhinged (in a good way) and I hope he’s having a good time since after BIS! I love how round your designs are and Fawf is no exception :D

Last but not least is this VERY soft Fawful from @localdealmaker and their AU, whose title I made up too (again doesn’t need to be canon or anything if you don’t want it to be, I just wanted to give every drawing a cute name ^^) I think yours was the most complicated to draw for me but I love how he looks, so squish!! Kaboo is cute too!

WHEW THAT WAS A LOT OF TYPING KSJHKGH but yeah I hope you guys have enjoyed this...I might make another part someday full of more Fawful designs from friends but I AM A LITTLE BURNT OUT...doesn’t mean I didn’t have fun tho!

#Marbars2023 #Fawful #AU #oc x canon #Superstar Saga #partners in time #bowsers inside story #dimentio #spamton #cackletta #baby mario #baby luigi #Naspi #Reddo #Kaboo #so many Fawfs!

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proffesional-dudebro · 8 months

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i rlly like your art style and i wanted to ask how you imagine kyle and cartmans personalitys?? (+ any general headcanons you'd like to share)

i see a lot of variety in how kyman is characterized and im curious abt your take on it

tysm for saying u like my artstyle!!

here's a drawing i just did of them:

putting all the stuff below the cut cuz its LONG

now, personalities...

uh first i'll do how they act towards each other and then more general personality stuff after 👍

i feel like at first cartman would be like "holy shit i like fucking KYLE ewewew no way" but at one point he just goes ah fuck it and confesses to kyle. i feel like he'd be the type to show kyle off and would probably tell EVERYONE when they start dating lol. also you cannot tell me this man isnt the biggest flirt EVER. he loves flustering the hell outta kyle.

as for kyle, i feel like he'd be more reserved in a way. he leans more towards verbal affection than physical affection. like, cartman has him in a death grip of a hug and kyle just sorta, pats cartmans back awkwardly.

(also fun tidbit: when cartman first confessed to kyle, kyle laughed in his face and thought he was joking. cartman tears up, calls kyle an asshole, and runs away, which makes kyle have this sorta 'oh shit' moment and he runs after cartman, blah blah blah they kiss, they start dating, the end.)

as for general personalities...

with cartman, he's still an asshole ofc, just kinda toned down for obvious reasons. most of the time he acts like a mean fucking bastard, but the SECOND someone he cares about is in trouble he's all over that shit. also CATS. he loves cats. and raccoons. and animals in general. he just loves animals, ok.

i imagine kyle being more stoic around acquaintances and strangers and stuff, but with close friends he acts more laid back and jokes around a lot more. also he's SUPER protective of ike. i see some people make kyle bully ike, and like, NUH UH. i'm a good older brother kyle truther till the day i die.

now some random headcanons:

PINE CANON PINE CANON!! kyle is tall as shit u cant change my mind.

i dont rlly like to call my designs a 'teen au' cuz i make them 13-14. its more like a 'cringe ass middle schooler au'.

the broflovskis are fucking rich bcuz a) gerald is a lawyer and b) they bought kyle a GODDAMN ELEPHANT in one of the earlier episodes.

cartman has heterochromia bcuz i said so.

kyle has green eyes because i have green eyes and i want more characters with red hair and green eyes bcuz its pretty.

that it!! (for now teehee)

#south park #south park fanart #south park headcanons #south park kyle #kyle broflovski #kyle broflovski fanart #south park cartman #eric cartman #eric cartman fanart #kyman #south park kyman #kyman fanart #ask

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go-against-fate · 17 days

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It's weird how i enjoy writing fics from Javier's POV more than i do with Lloyd (⁠￣⁠ヘ⁠￣⁠;⁠) but when it comes to art, I'll only draw Javier when Lloyd is included in the artwork

After discussing about it a bit with discord peeps, i arrived at the conclusion that I like drawing Lloyd more because he's literally just some guy. Draw a generic character base, make them have a side bang hair style. Boom. Lloyd Frontera. Now compare that with Javier Asrahan who is described as someone so fucking gorgeous, an otherworldly beauty, his looks and personality (but mostly looks) is to be envied and admired by all. How the fuck am i supposed to draw that? Not to mention his hair?? I havent complain about this here yet but i DETEST drawing his hair. I have to constantly have a reference of him because in each drawing that i did of him, he looks different!! Why? Because his hair looks different everytime!! I get his looks right ONCE and then never again!! It drives me insane!! I'll only draw him if Lloyd is also there!! That's how much i dont like drawing him!!! Ik this sounds like a major skill issue but idgaf i only like him by proxy

HOWEVER. I just. Cannot. Write from Lloyd's POV. idk. I can never seem to get it right. The thing with him is that despite his average looks, he's extremely fucking smart. His knowledge is vast and otherwordly. and i'm just someone with slightly above average scores. I cant fucking put myself in his shoes because i literally cannot do it. He's too smart for me. Im not smart. I prefer to scroll my phone for unprecedented amount of time, rotting my brain, while Lloyd will plan out ways on how he's going to change the lives of the masses. I dont know what tf hes going to do next. Fucking. Build an amusement park because thats somehow related to preventing the world from ending or some shit I DONT KNOW

That's why I like writing fics from Javier's perspective!! because he's also just a normal guy. His way of thinking is interesting, but still comprehensible to me because I can put myself in his perspective. I can imagine myself having to take care and protect my dumbass of a friend boss from accidentally dying. He's observant, not compulsive (something i can very much relate to). His motive is that of a stereotypical hero protag. I need to save the people even if i die in the process type shit. Hes honest, but willing to lie when it comes to Lloyd. Again. Traits that the average person can . probably. relate to. Probably not the i'll sacrifice my life for the people part. But still. Javier is a pretty sensible guy

Anyway In conclusion. Javier and Lloyd go together like peanut butter and jelly or however the word goes. They compliment each other in so many ways. I love them. They make me sick. Thank you for coming to my teh talk

#teh talks

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tacochippy · 6 months

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Aight since you sent me some of the questions I'm sending you some!

1 and/or 2, 7, 10 and/or 11, 14, and 15

Feel free to pick and choose which ones you wanna answer if you don't wanna answer all of them ^^

What is/was your favorite subject in school and why?

I really lo ed math !! it was nice qhen i understoos the moethod and reasoning, because then i can just sit and do tbe same rhing over and over again. Oh, doing percentages? ik how to calculate that and why it is that way. Stats? oh yeah theres diff things for specifci reasons and you figure it out tjis way. FUXKING ALGEBRA AUAHGHGG. THERES THINGS YOU FILL IN ITA THE SAME FORMULA EACH TIME JUST SOUBLE CHECK AND YOURE GOOD <33

What's a subject you feel knowledgeable about (including fandom stuff!)? What're your favorite things/facts in that subject?

I feel pretty knowlegable about abuse and childcare/certain child psuch things! not very much, but ig uts the thing i could ramble the most abt aside from lego monkie kid and a few toehr fandoms i cant quiiiiteee rembemebr. My fzv fun fact is that threats of physical abuse can and mostly do have the same mental effects as if the person had followed through (ie/ getting told by your dad that hes gonna hit you, after enough time/consistently enough, you will react as though he had hit you all those times)

Do you have any projects going on right now? What's it about? What's your favorite thing about it?

I dont have any projects going on right now, but i just finished one so ill tell you about that !! This is my dnd character, Bramble Elodia! She was created by a man named Foth Eir Oak Elodia. He has a dream of creating a city full of just robots and mschinery and living artifical people, such as bramble who is based off of porcelain bjd's!! :3 my fav tbing abt her is her cute, friendly nature despite her tall (she is 7'2) stature and sense of looming. I also ADORE her camera apeture eye, she has a camera in her head. Funf act abt her !! she has water based mechanisms inside her, like little mills and such, so she always sounds like flowing water :}

What are some (movies/shows/books/video games/songs/other media) you'd recommend and why?

Movies - Tangled !! Its fun and lighthearted with some pretty epic emotional beats. very relateable.

Mirror Mirror (2012) !! IT IS A SUPER FUN SPIN ON SNOW WHITES STORY. REALLY GOOD EMOTIONAL BEATS. PHENOMENAL COSTUMING AND AET DESIGN. VERY FUN AND HAS ASILLY ANTICS AND THE MAIN CHARACTER (SNOW WHITE) GETS REVENGE IN A SUPER COOL WAY AND ITA NOTBPRESENTED AS WRONG THAT SHE WANTED REVENGE. GOOD COLOUR SYMBOLISM. SUPER FUN MAGIC SYSTEM. ITS GOOD ITS REALLY GOOD JUST TRUST ME PLEASE WATCH IT

Shows - LEGO MONKIE KID !! INSANE ATORYLINE, HAS FUN GOOFY GUYS, REALLY GOOD FEELINGS. VERYBFUN AND SUCH A COOL ART STYLE !!

Books - Percy Jackson. Need i say more?

Video Games - Deep Rock Galactic !! Go into the mines and kill aome bugs! Good customisation, none of the classes are useless, good for accesibility settings. Has subtitles. Rock and Stone !! Cute robots too (bosco and molly and bet-c and dottie etc) Good and fun lore. Angry Man Is Funny (mission cobtrol). If you get it i can play with you !! :D

Songs - Two of Many by The Happy Fits! very cute song <33. Cotards Solution by Will Wood and the Tapeworms! SO COOL !

Other Media - Satorun Devouring His Son by Goya! its a good painting.

What hobbies do you have? What's your favorite part? Your least favorite part?

I mostly do digital art, i write too, and kandi art as well! For digital art, my fav is definitely the colours and special effects i can do. I have the whole rainbow whene i need it, i can easily change and wdit the pallette, its so fun and good. Least favourite is comijg up with what to draw akdbfjbgf

For writing, id say my favourite part is using nice words and portraying things drawings cant express (at my skill level i mean) and how you can change the readers feelings with just a few simple word choices- its nice to cut through to your reader like that. Feels like im making a connection. Least favourite part is keeping the words in my head and the words in my word doc the same or similar. Im bad at keeping the words in my brain when i think up cool things to say, so i tend to get the vauge thoguht down but not what i wsnted

For kandi art, i LOVE how pretty it is! giving it away as gifts is fun too. The beads slot together so well, creating paths for the string js fun and so satisfying. Least favourite is when i ACCIDENTALLY DROP THE STRING AND THREE HOURS IF WORK GOES DOWN THE DRAIN T-T. its a little finnecky sometimes too, and i got big clumsy sausage fingers jsjfjgjf

Silliest thing you've ever done?

okag okay. no judging ne over this even though i was like 14 and passed the age i should have done stuff lsike. uh. thatm this. i suppose.

So. Im 14. im about to make a hot chocolate. the water has boiled.

I decide i want filtered water instead. I decide, in a moment if beautiful clarity, that the shirt ive been wearing for like three weeks straight without breaks (deppression) would make a good filter.

I put my shirt over the mug. i am standing on my tippy toes to reach the counter. there is cat hair on my shirt and it is deeply stained. I have not yet realised that my shirt will then be wet with BOILING HOT WATER ON MY STOMACH. nobody is home. i am safe in the ignorance and ignorance of all rules and laws.

The mug is halfway full.

I need to take a break from being on my tippy toes. i stand down on flat feet.

the mug tips.

i now have boiling water all over my stomach.

my wet and warm shirt is now on my now burnt stomach.

i go upstairs and douse myself with coldish water in the shower.

sopping wet and in pain. i cry

i do not come clean about this for a whole year and a half. i say i just spilled it on my stomach normally.

end scene

What was your dream job(s) as a kid? Why did you wanna do it? Is it still your dream job?

My first two dream jobs were fahsionista/fashipn designer and an author! I wanted to be a fahsion designer cause i lovelove clothes and being able to express myself really well. As for author? I just like dwriting, and telling kinda fucked up stories (at my age and reading and writing elvel i mean). Mostly wrote about lesbians. Didnt know what a lesbian was.

Id always loved story telling, i just thoguth and still think its really cool. When i was about 4, i think dad said, i would tell HIM bedtime stories ibstead of him telling me any. This more than once lead to me telling stories such as the one where a big monster went to this town and atr my entire family (i went into as much grotesque detail as my brain could muster) and sawed off peoples limbs to use as utensils like chopsticks and then ate those too and bit off peoples heads to trhow them at my other family members. the big momster had fun doing this. much fun. then at the edn i reveleaed that the monster was ME the wjole time and yeah dad said it was scary for me to do stuff like that.

Also do you KNOW how concerned my teacher was when 4th grade me wrote a story about two girls locked in this guys basment in tiny little capsules and they had to escape with the other girls that qere there? and how they had to kill the giy that trapped them ans the emotional aftermath of taking a human life, but knowing it was them or you and they saved all these women too? so concerned. dad said i wrote like if stephen king loved pink glitter and fairies that ate people. and was also 9 years old.

sorry these werent answered in roder i jsut copy apsted all of the questions so i wouldnt forgor skfbgngjgj

#if yku want a breif and or in depth plotline synopsis thing for the movies i can do that for you btw amie #im. uh. not very proud of that burning myself story #injury mention #tacos askbox #amie !! 💜💜💜💜💜

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aki-346 · 8 months

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Pokemon Head Canons :)

These Head Canons are for both tsme trio and my AU (Au: Pokemon Sunrise | IK ITS STUPID IDK WHAT TO NAME IT / Can yall help me get a name for my AU?)

(this is going to be really long so sorry)

General

There is a time skip 2 times- 3 year time skip and 4 year time skip.

Alain-

Alain is 18 Turning 19 in XYZ ( 3 year - 21 / 4 year - 25 )

Alain birthday is July 24, 1998 (Lavy Hc <3)

Professor Sycamore adopted Alain and Maron. So Alain and Marons last name are Sycamore.

Alain does live in the lab but he moved in with Aki at 19 (After Kalos Crisis

Alain and Maron are researchers that work with Sycamore.

At the Age of 25 he took his dads job and now is the professor of Kalos.

Alain, Daigo, Maron work together ever since Alain and Daigo are dating

HE CHANGED HIS STYLE BECAUSE OF AKI- THANK YOU-

He has a matching charm thing with Aki.

He has kinda longer hair, like a mullet

Daigo and Alain started to Date after Tsme.

Alain buys Promise rings that match with Daigo because they promised each other that they would get married. (Age 23)

Alain does propose to Daigo at age 25. (but as fiancées)

Tsme happened around 17 and Kalos Crisis was 18-19

When Alain figured out he was being used by Lysandre, he broke his key stone in the process (On Marie / Lumiose tower )

Alain does have PTSD, Trust issues, has a hard time to show feelings.

Alain at the age of 23 he became the Champion of Kalos (Master Tournament happened around 21)

(The reason why he is so close to Aki because Alain see Aki as a young sister and Aki sees Alain as a older brother. NOT BECAUSE I SHIP THEM)

Alain was with a happy family but his family was toxic and never was proud of Alain. That effected him to make him not proud of himself too.

Alains dad left (Alain was 6 when he left) leaving Alain and his mom all by themselves but in the process his mom left Alain too because Alain looks likes his father (has the same eyes).

Alains family usually goes to the adoption center to look for another kid because Alain always wanted a younger sister.

After being abandoned he left the house because he was starving for days and went to the adoption center where he was cared.

Being at the adoption center for almost a year- Sycamore took him in as a assistant then a son (but secretly Sycamore took care of him like he was a son).

Dagio-

Daigo is 20 in XYZ ( 3 year - 22 / 4 year - 26 )

Master tournament

Daigos birthday in on February 11, 1997

Daigo is a royal core person (WHICH WORKS SO MUCH)

He is still the Hoenn champion and now the CEO of the Devon Company.

He got eyelashes because hes girlie pop

Daigo hair is longer then Alains-

His personality is vey sassy and very dirty minded ( BECAUSE YES)

He has tried Pokemon performing before but he doesn't do it anymore sadly. (He actually does secretly mwahaah with Mikuri of course)

Back when Daigo was still the heir of the company, he was suppose to have an arranged marriage with May so the company could be more supported with the help of Hoenn Queen.

But he fell in love with Alain so he told his dad, and the marriage was called off but his dad was really disappointed.

Alain, Daigo, and Aki go around all the regions to go to labs and do research or just help out.

Daigo did change his suit outfit because Aki did make one for Daigo (I will draw the design trust)

He is a very sleepy dude and doesn't get enough sleep because of work just like Alain-

Daigo doesn't have a great relationship with his parents but is trying to get closer to his mom. His mom is really nice to Daigo's friends- but shes more friendly to Alain, Mikuri and Maron.

(I will make a part 2 later so it wouldn't be so long)

#incombustibleshipping #steven stone #pokemon alain #pokemon #Pokémon Sunrise Au #pokemon headcanons

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feline-evil · 6 months

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I would love to here you info dump about your ocs if you want to?

Grinning evily, I SHALL DO SO!

So ik its been a while since i've really drawn or talked about my boys but a refresher for everyone is i have an OC universe/story loosely titled Flesh and Bone with is a The Thing inspired story featuring my Oc's Clay, Damien and Jack! All three work on a shady arctic base run by an evil corp unbeknownst to them, and after a sequence of horrible incidence and creature attacks Clay is 'killed' only to come back as! Some sort of slopbeast thing monster! He's cool and chill though, not a threat to anyone; hes a wet bag of nerves desperately trying to maintain his shape as the man he was once before, because thats who he is!! It's a story about identity (both in all my main cast being trans men but also in the more metaphorical and subtextual reading of. Clays whole deal lmao) and exploring what that means, and its also about three gay fruits experiencing THE HORRORS!

I have not written it, it's far too big a task rn, but thats the basic idea <3 everyone can always feel free to check the flesh and bone tag or any oc tags (ie oc: damien, oc: clay, oc: jack ect) on my blog to see stuuuuuuff about it!

MORE BELOW THE CUT, LIKE WAY WAY MORE SO MUCH LMAO, and as always heads up for horror themed when it comes to my lil oc's and their world <3

Lately a lot of what i've been thinking about with my oc's has been the physical changes that happen throughout the time they spend trapped in that research base, because they are there for a LONG time they do look different than they do at the start! Obviously there's the general stuff like Damien's hair growing long and the roots showing, Clay's facial hair getting scruffy and his hair getting long and unruly too, jack cutting all his long hair off (too dangerous to wield a flamethrower frequently with all that hair in the way in his learned opinion); but then there's the more physical side of going through this really tough time too, more than just aesthetic changes like hair and clothing changes. The most obvious is yes, Clay IS just a writhing mass of meat that replicates the appearance he wants to be seen as; yes including his clothes his scarf has a heartbeat don't worry about it. But then there's stuff that's not Whatever the hell Clay's deal is; Jack loses a leg, they all gain a multitude of new scars, this is a long, tough situation to survive and none of them are untouched by this- but thats part of the point! You can go through traumatic stuff and you can make it through, it might change you, it might change stuff about you, sometimes in ways you cant undo, but you can still make it through!! And you can still be loved as you rightfully deserved, and you can live a long happy peaceful life!! Thats a big part of the heart of *waves hands* what i am doing in my head with my oc's.

When i can draw for longer periods again i'd like to make reference sheets with 3 views of each character on each, a before, during, and after.

Another thing i've been thinking of lately is the day comes back after 'dying'! And its both horrific and later funny so i like it a lot.

So. Thing style monster drags him away screaming from the base, he is torn to shreds, the last person to see him alive is Damien and he watches that thing tear him *apart*. Everyones pretty certain he's very dead.

Days pass.

Then Clay wakes up in a hollowed out ice cave, one thats been melted into this larger open space by the pile of dead flesh and meat that has been dumped inside it, the pile that he has also been dumped in. It reeks, its horrific, he has to climb and clamber his way to the top in a state of abject disgust and horror; he doesn't remember how he got here. He doesn't remember anything past that thing getting a hold of him. (Unbeknownst to him he IS that thing but he'll figure that out later, he kind of does know that to an extent but not on any conscious level nor is he willing to accept it to much later, boys in denial. When it killed him and ate his flesh for some reason it fucked the beast up and fully replaced whatever it was before with his memories and consciousness so this is him now, the body he had before is gone, this is Clay now)

The only way out of this cave is a very narrow passage leading up, he starts to try and crawl in. Too tight, he doesn't fit. He keeps trying and trying in sobbing desperation until....he.....does fit. Shoulders give way, he slides in, this gap too small to rightfully fit his head through he is somehow now fitting through. He's going to pretend he isn't, he's not a stupid man but he fully cannot cope with comprehending his body moving as if boneless right now, his brain cannot cope nor begin to even parse the possibility that he is morphing like slimy slipper meatgoop to fit through here. He escapes, collapses out there on the ice for a bit miles from the base. He cries for a bit. Repeats in his head over and over that that hole was big enough for him, it was normal, he crawled normally, it was normal and fine. And then he eventually starts walking through freezing winds and blizzards in the direction he hopes the base is.

NOT FUNNY YET I KNOW, BARE WITH ME. ITS THE NEXT BIT OK

Clay reaches the base eventually and climbs through a window, enters the currently empty dining hall. He's back! He is. So so mentally checked out and traumatised and FUCKED from his experience that all he can think to do is just....go back to normal, pretend it never happened. He sits down. Pours himself a coffee in his favourite mug.

Footsteps echo closer, people are coming.....

jack and Damien walk in and freeze. They stare at Clay.

Clay stares at them.

'H-hey!' He says, waving over, 'you uh! You guys are up early!'

DAMIEN GRABS JACKS ARM, GET THE FLAMETHROWER HE SAYS

CLAY GOES OOP!!!!!

(Art of this moment memorialised forever by my beloved boyfriend @subsequentibis btw!!)

AND CLAY THEN SCHWOOPS LIKE LIQUIDY MEAT UP INTO A CEILING VENT AND REASSURES HIMSELF THAT THE GRATE WAS DEFINITELY OFF THE VENT AND HE DIDNT JUST FIT THROUGH TINY TINY HOLES ITS FINE ITS NORMAL ITS FINE ITS FINE, AND HIDES IN THE VENTS FOR A BIT. LMAO, LOVE MY SILLY COMEDY BIT

#jay talkin #flesh and bone #oc: clay #oc: damien #oc: jack #tag for answerin asks

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oreo-line · 2 years

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Treasure : Zero to One | Ateez

Hey all, here’s no. 4, part of Oreo Tries To Get Into Groups; a series where I look into a group’s available discography and try to get into their music! Again, Ateez was the first group I did for a first listen review of their full available discography and now they’re one of my ults! As always, review has been modified from the initial version for better readability.

Note: those songs with asterisks are among my favourite songs on that album, and a double asterisk means it is my top favourite from the album. Songs are rated out of 10 and are affected by how much I enjoyed each aspect (vocal delivery, rap delivery, composition/instrumentation, concept delivery through music, vibes). For this reason, the ratings are 100% biased and aren’t meant to be an objective reflection of the artistry that goes into a song, simply my thoughts, likes, and dislikes.

...

You can tell that this is really where Ateez began carving out their sound for themselves. Ofc their b-sides here are still a bit generic b-side ish, and ik they do another summer-y concept again, but like yeah. HALA HALA and Say My Name are very much staple Ateez songs that define their sound in the eyes of the public (and also me).

*HALA HALA: So I first heard this song as just the chorus when people were doing a random play dance...I can’t remember where exactly, probably a variety show. But bc of that I was kinda eh about the song, which at first doesn’t really sound like my style. After listening to the whole thing and watching them perform it, I can honestly say it’s one of my favourite Ateez songs and I get excited every time I hear it lmao, I can always picture them performing it (particularly San breaking all of his bones and also probably his mic during that last chorus, the man is on another level of dedication to the art) and that really changed everything for me. How times change. But yeah, I love that whole pre-chorus/hook section so much, and I think it’s actually very interesting how stripped most of the instrumental is in comparison to how hard this song goes (lmao that one video where you can hear Jongho sing his prechorus line at full volume in the bg of a TXT interview at some sort of award show even through the walls jflsdfjlsjdf He really fills the space that’s available huh). The lyrics are pretty classic Ateez so no complaints there (also silver-haired ending fairy Wooyoung my beloved!) 9.5/10 for the way I get so hype for this song now.

*Say My Name: Fun how all of their title songs are so freaking hype huh. I love the instrumental in the opening of this one, and I love the bridge into the chorus at the end, it builds so beautifully! It’s totally a Leez/Ollounder thing lmao. Even if I don’t know if they were part of this track, I know they were part of this track. Also, I love the concept of like staring your dark side in the face. I know that Seonghwa gets a lot of attention this era bc of the tongue thing and San bc of that really cool looking move that he loses his mind doing in the last chorus part (you know the one), but I really think this is Mingi’s comeback? Like it just really goes well with his voice and aesthetic and I really love him in it lmao. Pretty standard Ateez lyrics as per usual. 8.5/10

Desire: This song is very interesting. the instrumentation has a lot of that very sensual sounding dream-ish quality. I think it’s interesting how the drop is almost an anti-drop, you’d think they’d make it heavier to go with the subject matter, but I kind of like this vibe better. I love the kind of bridge/outro thing that’s going on, it makes me think of crazy in love. (edit: also sorry but the choreo for this song from their last tour (fellowship) with the blindfolds??? you are kidding me.) 7/10

Light: I like the chill vibes in this one, it gives them all a chance to demonstrate a different side of their vocals (particularly Jongho and San, who yeah shine usually, but draw it back for the mood really nicely here, demonstrating their grasp on dynamics). This actually really makes me think of the vibes of a Monsta X b-side ngl. 7.5/10 for some particularly nice stuff from vocal line

**Promise: This was probably the very first song I ever heard or loved from Ateez, and I still love it to this day. I discovered them through this song in 2019 when a friend thought I would like them, and then became a casual listener who popped in to listen to a title track every so often until I properly started to like. follow them as people not so long ago. Why do I love this song you ask? Something about the vocals and the way the dynamics build. For some reason every time I listen to this song my brain is flooded with serotonin, especially hearing San and Jongho’s high notes (Jongho’s belted high note here though. definitely got to be one of the most vocals of all time). It’s also really fun to sing along to! 10/10.

From: Babyteez!!! They’re so cute! The one performance they did of this song on music bank makes me want to puke rainbows or something. Seriously, it’s adorable, if you haven’t seen it, please do so. Overall this song is very adorable and upbeat and I applaud Hongjoong for making something of this quality even in his pre-debut days. 8/10 bc they were just so baby. And it was so funny to watch them react to the MV jdksfjsdfjl

Overall a decent album, that I overall enjoyed more than the last, actually. I can’t believe they actually promoted two title tracks for both the albums. Ateez is. Insane actually. They really promote various songs almost every comeback, with their level of intense choreo and intense vocal style...okay then.

#ateez #oreo.revisits #oreo.log #oreo tries to get into groups

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stargazer-balladeer · 3 years

Note

it’s my birthday soon and i’ve always felt lonely during my birthdays— so if it’s alright, can i request headcanons for scaramouche, xiao, and albedo with an s/o who only locks themselves in their bedroom because they don’t feel special enough to even celebrate their birthday? thank you 🥺

S/o’s birthday but locks themselves in their rooms because they don’t feel special [Genshin Impact]

Characters Included: Albedo, Scaramouche & Xiao

Notes: 👁👄👁 the title is so long- i don’t know how to shorten it- hshshs. Btw, HAPPY ADVANCE BDAY ANON-!! I KNOW THAT FEELING ANON- SO UR NOT ALONE 🤧🤧 if you want to talk, you can msg me anytime-! You deserve to be showered with love-! Hope ya’ll like this!

Reader’s Gender: Neutral

Warning: none

[aether, childe, diluc, kaeya, venti]

Albedo

As much as Albedo wants to remember your birthday, he just forgets because of many things running through his mind. Especially when it comes to new discovery. He’ll be so sorry when he remembered that your birthday was today-

At first, Albedo had a hard time looking for you. He asked everyone- yes even Diluc, Kaeya, Jean, Klee, everyone- but no one has seen you. Which made him worried since no one has seen you the entire day—

He would literally tear down Mondstadt trying to find you until he remembered that he hasn’t check your house yet. When he finds that you’ve been locked up in your room the entire day, it literally broke his heart- ;w;

He would feel like it’s his fault that you don’t feel special, like bro- he would have a sad puppy face on. He will put his hands on either side of your face and make you face him-

“You are special. You are like the sun. You are like a (God/Goddess). Even if you don’t feel special yourself, you’re special to me. And since you’re my beloved, my (prince/princess), you deserve all the happiness and love in the world. You deserve to feel special on your special day. So smile, I don’t want to see any tears.”

Albedo would do anything you want, probably to make up his forgetfulness- :p if you want cuddles, then cuddles you’ll get. If you want a cake or something, he’ll try to bake something, no promises though. (Its the thought that counts, right? 👀).

Albedo would use his ability of drawing and bringing them to life. He would draw all sorts of things, bunnies, squirrels, flowers, and others. He knew that you love watching him draw and bringing them to life. It honestly warms his heart knowing you love what he’s passionate about.

If you want, Albedo could talk to you about all the things he found out recently. All of the research and things he discovered. If you ever question some things regarding about what he discovered, he would happily try to explain it. (It’s honestly adorable seeing him explaining the things he discovered in his research- 🤧)

At the end of the day (around 11-), he would cuddle with you while laying beside you. Every so often, he would press a kiss on your head.

“Happy Birthday, my love. May many more to come... the next time your birthday come, I promise we’ll celebrate it together properly.”

Scaramouche

If you think that Scaramouche doesn’t care about your birthday, then you’re right-! 😃 I’m joking- (unless-). He honestly wants to spend your birthday together with you, but his duty as a Harbinger comes first.

Believe me when I say he feels guilty. Leaving you alone on your special day is honestly low, even for him. He would definitely try to finish all of his missions immediately to get back to you. He would do whatever means necessary to finish them all immediately (he might or might not have sacrificed some people in the process- 👀).

You can imagine his confusion when he couldn’t find you anywhere. He already has something set up for you, all he needs is the birthday person themselves. But he couldn’t you anywhere.

Someone better tell him to check your room or else he would literally tear down the Fatui headquarters just to look for you-! He seriously need to manage his anger- 😓

Scaramouche would find it weird to he finds out that you’ve been in your room for the entire day. At first, he didn’t understand why you’re doing this. But soon, he’ll understand. Afterall, he might’ve done that before..

This guy has no manner whatsoever as he just entered your room like he owns the place- one look at you and the next thing you know is that he’s pampering you- like he’ll be preparing a bath for you and choosing an outfit for you (he’s a fashionista, change my mind 😃). Like bro, who are you and what happened to Scaramouche?

“Tsk. You’re quite a handful, you do know that, correct? Making me go through all this effort to comfort you. Now tell me, who put that idea on your head? Was it your family? Was it someone else? I honestly want to murder whoever put that idea in your pathetic head. ‘Not special to celebrate your birthday’? Ha! Don’t make me laugh. Everyone deserves to feel special, even if its for one day. Now, stop being stubborn and enjoy it-!”

Scaramouche would pamper you so much, like his personality did a 180- he would be pressing kisses all over your body and praising you like theres no tomorrow. He would help you dry yourself and put on the outfit he chose for you. If your hair is long, he would help styling it.

He would take you on a fancy dinner date (this guy is also rich, fite me—). He would honestly spoil you lmao- so enjoy it while it lasts- 😃

“Don’t expect this everyday, okay? I’m not gonna put much effort the next time... still.. happy birthday, my beloved. Don’t ever feel like you’re not special when you’re special to me.. if you ever feel sad, come to me. Thank you for putting up with me.”

Xiao

(Yes I’ve remade the Xiao banner again- 🤧🤧 im very indecisive ik-)

Celebrating birthday? What’s that? Xiao honestly didn’t think much of it since centuries pass by with his day of birth passing each time, he never really thought much of it. Never bothered celebrating it.

But when he found out (from Verr or Rex Lapis/Zhongli) that the mortals celebrate their birthdays, he honestly doesn’t have a clue on how to celebrate it. So he might seek the help of Verr or the Traveller.

He does his best. Please give him credit for trying- ;;w;; He’ll try his best to make something for you. It won’t be anything grand. A simple picnic near Wangshu Inn with some Almond Tofu and other food-

So when the day of your birthday came, Xiao is nervous. He doesn’t know if you’ll like the surprise or not. But when he started to look for you, he was confused when he couldn’t find you before growing worried.

Unlike the other bois, he would immediately check your room before tearing the place down- when he finds you there, he’s honestly confused again- (poor bby, always getting confused- ;;w;;). When you explain to him that you just don’t feel special during your birthday, Xiao would get worried and upset-

The first thing he does is hug you. Like this is the only thing he knows about comforting someone- its not like he encountered humans that needs comforting- ;w;

“I.. don’t really know what it feels like to not feel special on your day of birth but.. you’re special to me. Isn’t that enough?”

Like broooo, he looks like a sad puppy- he’s honestly lost on what to do. You might as well need to comfort him too 😅. He would try to shower you with affections before dragging you to the picnic he set up.

He would be so relieved if you like or love the picnic he set up. As much as its embarrassing for him, he would allow you to feed him and, if you let him, feed you in return. He will continue to press some kisses on your face, head and hands. Because, like, u really deserve it- 🥺🥺

He would bring you to the highest mountain just near Wangshu Inn and enjoy the view, and possibly go stargazing with you. I can see him knowing how to make a flower crown for some reason :pp so he’ll make a flower crown out of Qingxin flowers and place it on your head-

“Happy day of birth, my love. Even as more days of birth come, I promise to make you special. Even though it’s not the grandest, I hope that my efforts and love will be enough.”

[x] Main Page || [x] Mondstadt Page || [x] Liyue Page || [x] Fatui Harbingers Page

#🤧🤧#i feel like xiao’s is rushed tho-#hshsh #HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAIN-!#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #albedo #albedo x reader #scaramouche #scaramouche x reader #xiao #xiao x reader #genshin impact albedo #genshin impact albedo x reader #genshin impact scaramouche #genshin impact scaramouche x reader #genshin impact xiao #genshin impact xiao x reader #req ans❣️

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infectedpaul · 3 years

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You Matter To Me (Squip/Reader)

You've had your Squip for a bit now and it's been fine for the most part, until he brings up the idea of looking into romantic relationships with others which opens up a lot of wounds you wanted to just bury deep and forget about. But you can't begin the road to recovery without asking why you got there, right?

SO IVE NEVER....WRITTEN AN X READER B4 UGH HJKSAJDASKDJSA esp not for a near dead fandom OH WELL oh well oh well h ignore this my normal followers please please

(warning 4 talks of depression/self degrading talk, its hurt comfort yada yada i need 2 touch grass ik)

ao3 link if u prefer that!!

You weren't made for love, at least, you didn't think so.

For as long as you'd been looking for it, it was always so out of reach. Easily visible, sure. Walking past groups of friends laughing it up on the sidewalks, partners entangled in each other's arms, seemingly trying to make their love known for all. But for you to have any of that for yourself? The heat death of the universe would sooner come, surely.

You'd sort of given up on it. It would be nice, you'd think. To be held, wrapped up in someone's arms, and just to stay there for as long as either of you could want. That cozy, warm feeling of being with someone that you only saw in movies or read about in books. But you had just accepted it wasn't in the cards, so to speak. And you were fine with that.

Well, you told yourself anyway. You knew it was for a deeper reason, though, but that wasn't something you liked to think about too heavily.

It was easier to do that when you didn't have a roommate that could dig into your brain and pry every little detail about them out of you.

When you got your Squip, you didn't know it'd be so adamant about perfecting every little last thing you were. How long or short your hair was styled, if your shoes matched your eyes, how fast or slow you were walking and how too brisk would make you seem like you were constipated but too slow and your likelihood of getting run over by a horse-drawn carriage gone would go up much higher, nevermind that you've never even seen a horse in real life.

What you did know, by now at least was that the Squip was persistent, seeing himself as your guardian angel, a guiding light in your desolate dark world of humanity, ickiness and week old pizza boxes you were too unmotivated to at least move off the bed.

So when his ideal response wasn't given when he proposed seeking out a lovelife, he was...well,

"I'm not sure I understand." His head crooked to the side, puzzled by your surface level indifference, "You're of consenting age, marginally attractive and only slightly under average at socializing. Finding a mate can't be too hard."

His holographic form hummed a soft, near silent buzz, a small imperfection to his otherwise flawless binary makeup. Other than that, and the soft, tinted blue glow around his form, he looked completely human. A little too human, really. Something so real, realer than any CG or video game, but something was just...off, something from the uncanny valley. You hadn't kept him in this form long, you liked to change it up from time to time, maybe to trick yourself into thinking he was someone new, making your brain think you had more friends besides the computer you bought behind a Rack Room.

You didn't look at him though when you responded, too preoccupied with the paper in front of you, decorated with a few characters concocted from your imagination. "I dunno," you shrug, brushing off eraser marks, "Just not my thing, I guess." You could feel his confusion, a bit of gut feeling as his thoughts jumbled in with your own. He was really only in your brain, afterall; the figure behind you sitting on your bed was just something he made up to ease your brain into trusting a new, larger source of perpetually growing information. "But, the purpose of this time in your life is to mate and birth young, is it not?"

You really wished he'd learn to stop talking about you and 'the homo sapien species' like you were a mindless ape made to breed and nothing else.

"Uh, I mean not really. I know that's what everyone around me is doing," Your mind thought back to all the cringey baby announcement videos from kids you knew in high school, "But it's...I guess I'm just not up for it. It's not really for people like me."

He was quiet. Only for a second, before he asked,

"People like you?" Another silence hung in the air. It was a truth you knew he could easily just reach into your brain and find for himself so you kept quiet for a bit longer, waiting for him to start digging. But you didn't feel it, that very familiar sudden ache in the back of your head you got when he went poking around for more things to nag at you about. Just quiet in your room, only the soft buzz and birds tweeting outside your window any solace from the uncomfortable silence you felt.

You shrugged again, and turned to face him, seeing now the muddled and a little concerned look on his face. "You know? The quiet ones, the losers. People like me don't get to be loved. I've just accepted that." You could have said a lot worse, and it seemed like he knew that. You didn't really understand, either. You didn't like yourself, plain and simple.

His concern only seemed to grow, eyebrows furrowing and staring intently at you. You thought for a second, maybe it was anger. It wouldn't be the first time. You were mostly compliant to his (mandatory) suggestions for life improvement, but every once in a while he would propose an idea that you would fight about, like clothes you weren't comfortable wearing for one reason or another. He said he was a learning computer, so he would need your help on things like emotions and comfiness, physical or mental, ruling out whatever the newest trends were. He would be fine afterwards but, he could get pretty huffy about you trying on too skinny-skinny jeans.

But that didn't happen, there wasn't a small but fierce jolt of electricity in your back to stop you from going against 'social programming', as he called it. He just looked at you a bit longer, seemingly turning gears in his head as he tried to process what you're saying.

You gave him a sober smile, trying to still seem indifferent, though for a second you wondered maybe if he was still prying at you, in a different way at least, because if he was, it seemed to be working.

"What? I'm just not that special. You of all people know that, right?" It was almost like you weren't hearing what was coming out of your mouth, that casual self-degradation that almost frightened him. You heard stories from message boards about that, older models of the Squip forcing reprogramming onto the host by breaking down their emotional state with verbal or physical punishment for...just existing, really.

He wasn't really like that though. Yes he could be annoyed when you didn't comply, but you were both good at compromise and treated situations like adults, even if at first you weren't much motivated to treat any situation at all. He informed you while you were looking through those boards that his creators had taken in accounts of previous incidents and built more of a guide to self-improvement than a ball and chain with a backhand. Humans were fragile, he knew that, and it wasn't okay to hurt them just to get a little closer to their goal.

But maybe, did he not think that humans were more than capable of hurting themselves? Their own words used against them, their internal voices bashing against their brains, turning them to mush and making them too scared or unmotivated to build it back up again.

"I just know no one would love some useless, pitiful person...I just kinda got over that a while ago." You almost frightened him with how nonchalant you were about the whole thing. It wasn't intentional, you weren't trying to seek attention or be funny. You just knew there was plenty of other people out there worthy of all that lovey-dovey stuff you thought would be nice but...it's just not meant for you.

There was a knot in his voice as he finally spoke up,

"That's why I'm here, isn't it?" The last piece of the puzzle had finally clicked into place, but he didn't look satisfied, not that cheeky, self-centered chagrin when things went his way or when he was proven right yet again.

You thought he knew that. You thought from day one he just figured that out and that's why he's been trying so hard to make you into a model citizen or something. "Did you just think you were here to help me pick out clothes in the morning?" You laughed, he seemed to know it was forced.

"Well...y-yes, maybe. I just...I never looked into that possibility of…" He was regaining his composure; this was a side you've never seen of him before. He's always been so astute, robotic and to the point. He's never fumbled over his words or had to give himself a second to figure out what to say next.

"How long has it been like this, Y/N?" His hands were folded neatly on his lap, still looking you dead-on, waiting for you to answer his distressed queuerie with worried patience.

You got up out of your chair, pushing it back and behind you to step away from the table and your drawings. "I dunno," you said, taking a few steps towards the long mirror hung on your wall, "for as long as I can remember, I guess." You looked at your reflection, only tired, dark eyes looking back at you. Even though the edge of the bed was visible in the mirror, your Squip didn't show up in it, another reminder of just how alone you were outside of your head.

"I just started to feel like I didn't belong more and more and...that ate me up so much I just started believing in it. I-I didn't wanna go to school or talk to people or even get up 'cause...well," You turned away from the mirror before you could see the tears you'd been holding back, looking at the more distressed figure in view of you again, "what would anyone be missing, really?" You still smiled, that big smile you both worked so meticulously on making seem not too forced when you had to act excited or just blend into normal social gatherings, but it wavered so easily, like a thin strip of paper about to tear off the nail that barely held it up on the wall.

His eyes widened at the sight of your tears, immediately getting up and briskly walking to stand in front of you, not knowing how to proceed in the moment. He hadn't had to deal with something like this yet and he was troubleshooting to see what was the correct response to a human breakdown.

You looked down, covering your eyes with one hand and clenching the other into a fist, big, strained smile still plastered on your face and trying so hard not to seem more weak than you knew you were. You were nothing. You knew that, you thought he did too. You thought you could just fix things, but how could you do that without getting to the source? You knew you couldn't just sidestep around why you wanted things to get better with humans, but with a computer who could read your brain like the newspaper, you thought maybe you could get around that.

You heard him sigh before a feeling of arms wrapping around you caught you off guard, the Squip entangling you in his grasp and his head resting on yours. It was all simulated, you knew. He had done things such as lightly punch your arm as if to say 'Good job, Sport!' or tap your shoulder to grab your attention without startling you, but this was different. He held onto you for a good couple of seconds, a wave of warmth spreading through your body in an instant. He pet back your hair with one hand, rubbing your back with the other and finally broke the silence in the room.

"Y/N, it- ...it pains me, hearing you speak that way about yourself. You're…" He looked down at you, holding you a bit closer and tightening his grip just a tad. "You're an incredible, talented, wonderful person. You've come so far and you've taught me so much about humans and myself and I just couldn't ask for a better-" He stopped. You knew what he was going to say, a better host, a better human, a better assignment to help and guide and-

"A better friend."

A friend?

He never referred to you or anyone with such a personal or affectionate term. It almost didn't seem real, like you maybe misheard him. Your smile had shattered into a small frown and, with teary-eyes and your voice already cracking, you looked up at him, meeting his almost-heartbroken eyes in an expression that looked so foreign on his normally composed face.

"What?"

He gave a weak smile, trying to be comforting but his fear showing plain as day. You could feel it within you too, a pit in your stomach forming as your chest tightened. You knew it wasn't your anxiety, but his.

"Do I need to repeat myself, Y/N? I think of you as a friend and..." His hand moved off of your back and ran itself up to rest on your shoulder, the other holding your cheek and wiping away your tears with his thumb. "I want to do all I can to show you that from here on."

You almost couldn't breathe as you looked at him, feeling for the first time that unconditional love you yearned for. You could feel your heart race in your chest, something you knew he could feel too but you were too crushed to say anything. You simply slammed yourself into his chest, grabbing fistfulls of his shirt that made your hands tingle like they fell asleep. His arms enveloped you yet again, the both of you holding onto each other so tight like either of you would fall through the floor if you let go.

You sobbed and sobbed and sobbed for what felt like hours, and, just maybe, you thought you could hear him crying too, but that'd be silly...right?

When you were finally out of tears to cry, you stood there still, simply bathing in each other's presence, the feeling you only saw in others finally yours. And you knew it was only a matter of time before this too was stolen from you, the universe would take back anything from people unworthy but...for right now, you wanted to be a little selfish.

"I'm sorry." You whispered, face still buried in his shirt.

"For?" His head was rested on yours again, holding up your weak and tired form with no effort, just trying to keep you propped up until you were ready to let go.

"I got you to help me but...I can't even let you in like I'm supposed to. But...I want to. I just want help." You pushed yourself off of him, one thought between you and him and his hands meeting yours, the simulated tingle in there again as you held each other's palms in yours and looked at each other with such exhausted eyes and worn-out but so genuine smiles.

He leaned down and planted a kiss on your forehead, a soft hue of pink blush spreading on your drained and exhausted face.

"I'd love to help, friend."

#dex says things #THE FUCK AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE FLDSJFKLDSFDS #THE WORST PART IS IM PROUD OF THIS UGH #be more chill #the squip #squip x reader #my writing #ITS 530 AM UGH

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slaygentford · 3 years

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professor antonius sorry if this is a stupid question but do you have any advice for someone who like. has never Got poetry. ik ik there’s tons of diff styles and aesthetics and what not but im missing something. i have several collections and i enjoy reading them but i feel like so much goes over my head until i read someone else’s analysis and i’m like o okay ,

This isn’t stupid I bet just no one ever walked you through close reading. Also I get this question ALL the time so I'm going to actually give a real answer for once wow. Also nobody reblog this because I don't want people like,. You know how this website is. People with their opinions. And I am too smart and good at my job to be like, made subject to that frankly. anyway So close reading is basically about tensions. Tension is stuff that doesn’t match up and it leads to two questions: WHY is that tension here, and what does that tension DO. Here is a picture

Dutch masters nice. This is called landscape with the fall of icarus. What tensions do you notice here. Well one I would say the fact that there’s this super pretty pastoralish scene and then on the bottom right icarus’s little leggy is sticking out of the water cuz his wings melted and he fell in! Like these things don’t fit together right? So what does that DO? Well it shuttles icarus off to the side, literally. It forefronts daily working life w that guy and his horse and makes icarus kind of a side note that no one in the painting seems to be noticing. So what conclusions can we draw about that? Maybe that we don’t notice extraordinary things happening. Maybe that mythology isn’t that important after all. What do u think?

Okay let’s look at a poem. I literally rn have Forrest gander open and I just reread beckoned

At which point my grief-sounds ricocheted outside of language.

Something like a drifting swarm of bees.

At which point in the tetric silence that followed

I was swarmed by those bees and lost consciousness.

At which point there was no way out for me either.

At which point I carried on in a semi-coma, dreaming I was awake, avoiding friends and puking, plucking stingers from my face and arms.

At which point her voice was pinned to a backdrop of vaporous color.

At which point the crane's bustles flared.

At which point, coming to, I knew I'd pay the whole flag-pull fare.

At which point the driver turned and said it doesn't need to be your fault for it to break you.

At which point without any lurching commencement, he began to play a vulture-bone flute.

At which point I grew old and it was like ripping open the beehive with my hands again.

At which point I conceived a realm more real than life.

At which point there was at least some possibility.

Some possibility, in which I didn't believe, of being with her once more.

okay, meaty. wow. I like this poem im just now working through this collection. anyways so what's some tensions. Well I think personally one is this repetition of "at which point" (look out for stuff that is repeated btw or just anything that seems to be drawing attention to itself). I think at which point is interesting not just cuz it keeps being repeated but because (jeopardy theme while I let you think about it) because it's like the middle of a sentence? like the first line starts "at which point" and that's like, a phrase thats supposed to connect stuff and it's just like... the beginning.

TENSION: first line and each following line (except the last) starts in media res, with the inciting incident unmentioned, which is weird.

what does this tension seem to DO? well it's kind of confusing cuz idk what happened at first. the incident is withheld from us. What can we CONCLUDE from the incident being withheld from us? maybe that the incident itself is too hard or even IMPOSSIBLE to put into language (which the first line kind of alludes to)?

and now I have more questions which are adjacent: why IS "at which point" repeated? what's the effect of repetition? does it gain or lose impact? does its meaning change as the poem continues? does the incident to which it refers change or stay the same? much 2 consider.........

okay so. 1) tension where? 2) tension why? 3) conclusion what? obv some stuff is like BLATANT juxtaposition like in the painting which is easier to parse. other times you have to forage in the text a little for tension by looking for repetition, or weird rhyme, or form, or where a line breaks, or an object that seems important. keep asking "why" and "how" and don't be thinking like, x MEANS that y. always b asking questions.

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smileposting · 3 years

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hiii habit 4 the character hc thibg ;-P wink wonk

freddie you are so fucking lucky you didn’t go with the other ask meme bc i would singlehandedly cement myself as the most annoying person on the planet with the unpopular opinions section alone

1: sexuality headcanon: The Big Gay. ik general fandom consensus is that he’s Some flavor of not cishet because i mean... Look At His Entire Character Arc Lol. but even with the stuff with martha (at least the machine/concept) a lot of it feels so much like. Ah Yes My Socially Acceptable Conventionally Attractive Female Partner Who Is Definitely Real Whom I Spend Time With, As A Man Does. that it was the thing that made me go from “well he’s definitely not straight” to “oh he’s GAY gay huh.” obvs no shade to anyone who does see him as bi/pan we’re just talkin about my hcs right now

2: otp: honestly the only thing keeping me from just leaving it at habismal is the fact that i. don’t like most habismal fan content? idk what it is but most of it just Does Not Scratch That Itch for me but at the same time the lil crumbs of what their dynamic is like both pre and post game and the conclusions you can draw from that makes me so unwell that i would be remiss Not to mention it so. i guess my answer is “habismal but only in very specific circumstances”

3: brotp: there’s a good chance this is gonna come out completely incoherent but like yknow how its kind of a trope for like a retired hero to come back into the story for whatever reason and they see a character they were best buds with back in the day and when they see each other they trade a bunch of loving insults and its like they never left at all? dream dynamic for him and fk in my opinion. at least my vision of fk.

4: notp: same shit as this ask but i don’t consider the other person involved to be a major enough character to really count as a ship so. none for now.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: habit has always had weird latent life-granting abilities, hence the carlas and cowboy bed, but he never saw it fit to warn anyone about them because he never thought of them as unusual, since he’s had ‘em since he was a kid. he got a hoot out of seeing staff react to them for the first time. you’d think they had never seen a paper doll before!

6: one way in which I relate to this character: sometimes when i was spiraling really really bad i’ve definitely had like... thoughts about how i can spin my trauma into a good story, something worth paying attention to. i don’t really relate to habit a lot so much as i find how hes reflected in other characters and in turn how those characters are reflected in him super fascinating but that’s the one thing about him that i’ve really been like “Oh shit that might b me”

7: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: not really embarrassment so much as frustration but whenever i’m writing fic where he’s typing something to replicate his writing style i get out two paintbrushes and i jab the wooden ends in the general direction of where i think the letters i want are and it’s the most effective method i’ve found so far but GOD is it tedious. let it never be said i don’t struggle for my craft. 8: cinnamon roll or problematic fave? problematic fave all the way. you canot change this.

[send me a character for some hcs!]

#smile for me #smile for me game #s4m #boris habit #ask #crittersteeths #man i wish this ask meme included gender hcs since i have a handful. habit included #not a major thing but something i definitely wouldn't Mind being invited to talk about lol

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yioh · 3 years

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Hey Yura! You've been reblogging posts on what looks really good wlw mangas lately and I'm dying for some good recommendations (especially since u have great taste🌸🌸)! Could you maybe list what you're reading (or watching) and what vibe each story has?

Hope you're having a great day and I'm sending lots of love your way!!!

hi hiii !!! sorry for taking so long to reply >_< i wanted to properly write an answer and then i .. never found time aaaaaaaa but here are my faves !!!!

relationship guidelines - this one is a manhwa about these 2 girls who have been friends since they were born !!! myeong in is aloof and rarely shows her emotions and is 'cold hearted' and ji won is cute and quirky and super flirty and overall a dumbass 101, somehow they find themselves kissing eachother and their relationship becomes ........ something they cant seem to understand themselves jsdhdkjh, i rly love this manhwa its so funny and so pretty and the characters r so fun and relatable its so lovely !!!! the pacing is so good too

not so shoujo love story - fellas this one . this one is SO good omfg its the funniest webtoon ever like the humour is just complete crack kldhkjh, its abt a 'delinquent' girl called rei who is in love w her senior (called ...ochinchin ... because... he has a massive chin..) and she rly rly wants ur typical shoujo style romance, only, plot twist the one whos in love w her isnt the cool popular senpai guy (who might be ??an alien??) but the perfect pretty vice president hanna !!!! its SO so cute also super slowburn and SO wholesome , also theres so much tension between hanna and rei i dshjsdhfh, the art style is GORGEOUS and the writing is amazing and i just . its a masterpiece pls read it, altho its hilarious its also ... so gentle and so loving i :')

she is still cute today - a slice of life abt wholesome puppy qi lin who is kinda an outcast and how she befriends a girl called cang shu, someone who prioritises her grades over everything else, to the point she barely has a life. its a story abt how they positively influence eachothers lives for the better and heal with eachother through their simple everyday school life(also mega mega mega slowburn, theyre friends rn but also ... gfs somehow lol) :) its v funny ad cute and pretty also theres a bonus mlm side couple that r rly funny lol, they have a rly gay friendship group and its SO cute and wholesome

tamen de gushi - i havent caught up w this in ages rip sdhjdsh but its just a cute slice of life abt 2 girls who befriend eachother and one of them has a HUGEEEEEE crush on the other, v v v v wholesome !!!!

still sick! - oh my god . this one is a masterpiece..... its a manga that revolves around shimizu, this super dorky girl that has a secret hobby of drawing doujinshi of her fave wlw ships lmao, and her work place colleague, maekawa, finds out about her secret hobby and barges into her everyday life and changes it in a way that she'll never expect ! from the synopsis it sounds p average but god the LAYERS this manga has . it deals w burn outs and love for drawings and has such wonderful characterisation and writing and the characters r so vibrant and fun and !!!!! the romance !!!!! they r so so so cute like i genuinely got butterflies at this kssdhkjdsh

soulmate - this manhua is so unique !! so its abt this girl who switches body w her teenage self, so she gets to experience falling in love with her lover all over again whilst her teenage self finds herself, 27 years old, and dating a girl ????!!! it deals with regret and first love and loneliness and dreams and just . i was v cautious abt this one because it could get weird but it was so beautiful and respectful and so .. melancholy and yet cute and joyful... the art is also so pretty !!!

bloom into you - this one’s an anime and its about a girl called yuu who believes she isn’t capable of falling in love even though she always longed to have that feeling, and then she meets her senpai, touko. somehow they get into a relationship where they brush hands and kiss secretly in the student council room after school and know all of eachothers secrets, touko tells her not to fall in love with her and yet yuu... doesn’t even understand her own feelings. ok as for vibes, its just TENDER tender TE n d er and . sad and it will make u so touch starved oh my god. its a very beautiful story and the soundtrack, colours and general vibe of the story is so nice and the characters r so freaking well written u will melt, i rly rly love this anime alot lmao its one of the very few romance anime i really adore, it doesn’t feel cringey at all and all the characters feel so painfully real ? its so good !!!!!!!!!!

that time I was blackmailed by the class’ green tea bitch - ok ok ik the title sounds wack but this is actually one of my faves rn, it’s just the softest cutest high school love story and it’s the perfect amount of funny and adorable and the art is also super cute and the relationship with the mc and her mum is so cute I’m 🥺 also it goes into other topics like academic pressure and loneliness (not too deeply tho) and it’s just a v good read … as of now it’s ongoing and has 17 chapters :)

i have some more i havent read yet :’) but these ones r 10/10 i hope u enjoy them !!!

#talk to me!#reccs

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thespoonisvictory · 3 years

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my opinion on irl/vlogging stuff is that it's going to be big for a few months, alongside the dream smp (see june-august/september probably) then start falling off and then turning into a regular thing on youtube that's alongside gaming content. we might get less streams during that time but i think around october or november things are going to shift back into more gaming and streaming-focused (especially with winter), with vlogs on the side as well (i can see a biweekly schedule for a lot of people, that shifts into weekly during warm periods). i could also see people getting burnt out on vlogs very easily when compared to gaming and variety content, however i do thing irl streams where people just mess around in their houses/backyards (like tommy has does) could become more and more commonplace. i also don't think another smplive/dream smp level big smp will show up for a while, however smaller smps might become more commonplace for people to just mess around on (see 3rd life smp, origins smp, etc) and roleplaying on different games might also get a boost (or the return of more aphmau-style minecraft roleplays in general). i also am imagining at least 2-3 attempted and failed music careers and/or just releasing one song (sorry about the length i have a lot of thoughts on the future of twitch and youtube)

dude I could talk about this topic for ages this is my shit I love you

*this is all sbi and co related, dteam career stuff is a whole other ballgame that I love to talk about but I'll limit myself to them

honestly? I agree. for all that I'm happy tommy's really excited to vlog, I just don't think it'll live up to the hype for more than a few months unless he dramatically changes his style. the main draw of his vlogs (and other sbi people) is the high, exciting energy, and seeing him and his friends irl together. but can he maintain that? eventually it'll be normal to see him and tubbo together, and he won't be able to keep up that kind of energy constantly. they have diminishing returns, each one gets slightly less hype.

the only person I could see being good at actual consistent vlogging and making their content very central to it is niki- she's very aesthetically similar to the sub-genre of chill daily vlogging that I really like rn (annika's leaf, linh troung, leah's field notes, etc), and I think people could latch onto that. if wilbur ever sits down and seriously decides to do travel vlogs, based off his deleted one, he could find serious success there too (but he could find serious success in pretty much any field imo lol).

as for the dream smp's longevity, it really depends on if wilbur and tommy decide to pick up the story again to finish off their arcs. as much as I appreciate the other writers, the story never quite moves like it does without at least one of them driving it, for a variety of reasons. I think quackity might burn himself out with this high production lore stuff by setting standards higher and higher, tbh. I hope we get to see some sort of resolution for every character via people coming together to give it a nice ending, but the days of daily lore streams and l'manburg are over unless someone picks up the story and starts running. could it happen? absolutely, but like I said, I think tommy and especially wilbur are the only ones who could pull that off. wilbur's like a gravity well for projects, he tends to be the one pouring the life in them, if that makes sense (rust, smpearth, soothouse, etc).

from there, I pretty much agree with you as to what's going to happen to non-smp content. I think either sbi and co will stay together as friends but it's going to split off content wise more than it already has, or they're all going to move near each other and stick even closer together (probably in brighton). once again, wilbur has said he's not just gonna leave the internet, but how much he streams and stays involved is going to be a deciding factor here, as well as how quickly/if lovejoy gets popularity outside of mcyt. (Ik this is full wilbur simp mode but genuinely he's the lynch pin of the friend group in a way, and he and tommy organize most projects). mcc is a constant.

feel free to send more asks I love this topic

#asks #spoon rambles #< new tag for long winded tangents that don't really fit in mcyt tags #future talk

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