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#my first fanfic!! and its actually posted!!

buzzingroyalty · 9 months

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timeline in which aziraphale is in fact tasked with raising a new baby jesus in an orphanage run entirely by angels so there are no shenanigans nor interferences but the supreme archangel insists they hire at least one human who actually knows how to raise human children. a "human" eventually shows up. Jesus 2 is named Lucy <3

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens 2 spoilers #aziraphale #crowley #fem crowley #fem aziraphale #first interaction heavily inspired by that post describing aziraphale showing up at crowleys door looking like hed just run a marathon w/ b #i dont think this is actually how the second coming is gonna work but its too late lucy is already bouncing around in my head #good omens got me acting unwise and thinking abt co parenting old woman yuri bible fanfic #melisongart #i dont love how this looks i still gotta figure out how to draw them #but take it

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squarebracketsmileyface · 3 months

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Okay, but listening to It Took Me By Surprise by Maria Mena now, with a lot more development having gone into Sorry It's Locked and a much better understanding of how Jay and Alex's relationship played out back in uni... As much as this song is how Jay feels about Alex... It's also VERY Alex about Jay back in uni, when he was finally realising he had to break off their fwb situation (Amy helps him come to this conclusion, and she's very right. Their relationship wasn't healthy for either of them. Both of them contributed to it being toxic—tho she only hears one side, so she doesn't realise that Alex really was just as big a part of the problem as Jay was. Just like how Tim doesn't realise that Jay was also a big part of the problem, because he's only heard Jay's side of the story—)

But just, god if they listened to this song, both of them would relate to it so heavily at different points in their relationship, and that makes me wanna chew them like gum. Like

Alex back in uni would relate to it quite a lot I think (especially with one of the things I have planned to write about the thing that finally drove them apart)

And Jay a little bit in college, but mostly after finding Alex again during marble hornets, all the way from chapter 2 of sorry it's locked up until the entry 80 fic I have planned, would relate to it as well.

Just. God, this song with the knowledge I now have of Jay and Alex and the relationship I've accidentally designed for them. If these bitches came to life and found me I think they'd team up to try and kill me for what I've done to them 💀

#god i need everyone to instantly understand how nuanced Jay and Alexs fucked up relationship it #but i cant get that without actually writing about it properly first.#like what do you MEAN i cant just project my thoughts straight into everyones heads #and i actually have to write them down and post them for people to read #this is a travesty #marble hornets #jay merrick #alex kralie #marble hornets fanfic #jaylex #mh sorry its locked

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nopeferatu · 10 months

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og nopeferatu followers will remember that one time i made a post asking if other people had ever heard the term "riding" in nsfw works used to describe the act of penetrating a person instead of someone being penetrated cowgirl style, because i see it a lot in brokeback mountain fanfiction, but i had never ever seen it used that way anywhere else before. i'm pretty sure i got two yeses, but like. they'd basically only heard it once themselves too

well i can confirm that it really and truly isnt just limited to brokeback mountain fanfic lol?? there's this artist who's getting big on tiktok lately bc he keeps making gay pop punk and country songs, and he's used "ride me" in his songs a few times even tho he makes it explicit that the narrator is the one being penetrated:

anyways. just an update on my findings.

#this is literally the first time id ever heard 'riding' in this context outside of brokeback mountain fanfic and its just very intriguing #i dont understand how riding can be described as something the penetrator does but whatever #i aint complaining lol #also you should check out the songs by spotify artist dixon dallas and ur pretty #its the same guy just different aliases for different genres #im not sure how much these songs are homophobic jokes when theyre actually really fucking good so...maybe listen at your own risk #but theyre severely stuck in my brain rn #still brokeback posting #not safe for worms

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mishy-mashy · 14 hours

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Hi! I noticed you bring up fanfiction every once in a while, so do you have an ao3?

I DO

But the stuff I post here isn't actually written out and posted anywhere else, and my ao3 (posted stories) is pretty bare. Like, I only touch it to read other people's stuff at this point

Everything I do write is OC stuff though, and that's not everyone's jam

The stuff I do post here all comes from my notes for said fic ideas. They're all fleshed out enough that I can write them into proper stories. Like, the whole plot is figured out, I know where to end, character perspectives, all that jazz. I just don't write them out, since I don't have that motivation, and the stories would end up huge

I don't like posting the actual stories either. People have asked for updates on the new chapters I just put down, and I've run into a lot of copy-pasters. Even the few things I have on ao3 is having a mimic somewhere. So I otherwise keep everything to myself, or post little things here

I've been going through my past stuff lately to reorganize. It's fun. Even if they're old (some are over 5 years old), I find little gems that surprise me like these

(Unordinary; Re:Zero; BNHA)

Like- they aren't that bad. That's surprising. How old are these things???

#/THE FIRST ASK ABOUT MY FIC STUFF?!/#anon take this crown and commemorative sash this is monumental #ask #fic #my drafts are HUGE so writing them into actual proper fanfics would be. very big #the average is 150k words the low-end is 40k and a lot of them have too many words that google docs glitches #and ive had to make multiple drafts to hold everything #i tried writing one out once and ended up stopping because the glitching from all the words was making it impossible to continue #capped out at *checks notes* 103k words #the word count mentioned in the previous tags are talking about the word count for NOTES. i think an actual story would become abysmal #i like planning stuff. a lot #the biggest one is for a bnha resistance fic at *checks calculator* 260k words #but its really unmotivating to know people just want content and to take my words for their own #REPEATEDLY. even the small stuff is being yoinked #im serious. Actually everything ive posted as an actual story has been copied by someone else and advertised as their own. im tired of that #but i like writing so i do it in private. mainly away from the eyes of the internet #excerpt from an old unordinary fic #and a rezero fic where groovy gets hugged and is screaming like hes watching his firstborn be slaughtered before his eyes #my drafts surprise me sometimes because huh. this is not that bad for 6 years ago #an unordinary (webtoon) excerpt cuz i was organizing my stuff and ran into an old draft of it. now its trying to weedle its way to the ligh #thank u for the ask anon #if someone asked for more about the small things i /do/ show id probably panic cuz. no one ever asks. what do i say??? oh no im CRINGE #/lh #a lot of nonrom actually. most of it is. including that 3rd excerpt #all the excerpts actually #oc #out of context excerpts

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oh-cramity-its-amity · 3 months

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its so weird to read some of my old fics (do NOT do it but i'm just being hypothetical rn) and reading it. like who even was this person?? i completely was in a haze back in 2020. i literally was posting 3 chapters a day. A DAY. what in the WORLD was that shit.

anyway i remembered some STUPID sappy shit and i didnt remember if i'd put it into a fic or not BUT I FOUND IT.

She and Hope had been dating in secret for months anyway, and any attempt to go talk to Ryan only filed her disposition of displeasure upon knowing that she couldn’t tell anyone, Molly especially, it destroyed herself mentally. They couldn’t really go anywhere near the school, always having to lie to everyone about having projects together when Molly wasn’t around them. It’d consisted with 9 PM - 2 AM intervals of being able to actually see each other. Hope would sneak through her small bedroom window with a portable record player and whatever she had gotten from the vintage record store downtown, and Amy would always fall asleep around eleven because of her internal clock. She would always wake up to find a single sticky note stuck on the edge of her desk whenever she woke up to her alarm the next morning. One of them, Amy still had tucked inside of her phone case, a heavily detailed human heart, with blue and red ink sketched onto a neon pink sticky note, there was a caption that headed the small paper reading the phrase over every now and again makes her almost melt every time. “You have my heart.”

yeah idk why the fuck but i thought of this fucking idea again today and i was like "omg did i ever put that heart note thing in a fic???" yeah you fucking did.

all that to say ME AND WHO???? imagine. thats so fucking.... RAHHHH.

#NOT TOH FANFIC #see this is why i write fanfic. to enact some gay ass shit like this.#the fucking STICKY NOTE WITH A DRAWING OF A HUMAN HEART AND SAYING “YOU HAVE MY HEART” I AM ON THE FLOOR.#*sighs* sucks i cant reuse it on lumity though.#my friend making me realize i actually have rizz but am just too much of a disaster to actually understand cues with people #its a MESS. im just all over the place. i literally ranted to THE SAME FRIEND yesterday (or the day before??) abt some girl jesus.#anyway i remember writing A LOT OF POETRY back in hs about this one girl and then the same girl i got to talk to--#--my first actual conversation with her i blurted out that i wanted to shave my head. she was like.... oooooo god i was A MESS #still slid into her school dms during covid and was like “haha guess what i actually mf did???” anyway all that to say underlying dysphoria #they're nonbinary now too and i kinda ghosted them like a complete idiot :(. its been two years or so but i still think of them... a lot...#actually i have more lore about this person and its like istg they actually really liked me but i could not pick it up.#we had such SUCH good chemistry and vibes. n they were really pretty. ughhhhhh.#anyway yeah idk crushes are weird sometimes. the universe knows how unstoppable id be with a partner #i feel like i was the reason they were able to find themself and their identity because when we were talking i always encouraged them #and told them to do what felt right. im glad they did. i think sometimes that brings me peace. like i served a purpose.#STILL showed them toh. STILL SHOWED THEM TOH.#we were talking about amity LMAO “this green haired girl seems interesting” SHE SO WAS.#...yeah i wish i could text them but i kinda probably fucked it up.#shitposting shit #idk what this post is i just wanted to talk about this dumb sticky note thing because im rotating it in my brain and remembering how #mentally ill i was back in 2020 #talking into the void yk how it isssss

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lovethatlaiduslow · 1 year

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Chapters: 2/2 Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Edward Elric, Alphonse Elric, Riza Hawkeye, Jean Havoc, Maes Hughes, Roy Mustang Additional Tags: Pre-Canon, Hurt/Comfort, Sickfic, Automail Talk, Parental Roy Mustang, ish, Angst with a Happy Ending, Team as Family Summary:

Roy is put to the test when one of Edward’s first assignments goes awry and he contracts a mysterious, deadly illness just a few months after joining the military.

#have not posted a story in a millennia but i finished this one!#first time writing a sickfick but its not actually a sickfic its more like a really sad character study #u know me!#tags incoming #my writing #fma #fma fanfic #edward elric #alphonse elric #roy mustang

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petrodragonicapocalypse · 1 year

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for me i think one of the (completely arbitrary) requirements for something having a Proper Fandom is the existence of a healthy amount of bad fanfic about it. idk what that makes b&tb nation though, since none of yall actually seem capable of writing anything bad LMAO

#seriously every one of ur fanfics has blown me out of the fucking water my dudes #i think maybe mine is the bad one actually 🤣🤣 i mean its the first fic ive ever written so its bound to be a bit questionable #my posts

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istanbulite · 2 years

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random scenario >>>

Eos and Astraeus touch this one cursed book n change bodies a la Obey Me Lucifer & Satan,,, so ofc they do what anyone would if they suddenly had different parts - have s3x!! So Eos s like hey you know I went down on women before so dw I got u and Astraeus is like.. ?? what makes you think I - Oh! I never told you :O

And this is how she learns he's bisexual :))

#astoria fate's kiss #lovestruck voltage #lovestruck #astraeus #afk mc #xx #oc: eos #out of all the silly fanfic tropes this is my favourite #its about seeing yourself in a different light #i believe this is the only way Astraeus can rlly compliment of himself (well Eos in him but still) he s like.. damn... im lovable actually!#idk when... probs post Lost Kisses #kids dont touch random books in Olympus #i think they could live this way?? sure awkward but like.. whatever #eos' first thought is lke... damn... I AM small

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ghost-of-you · 2 years

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Catch 22 - CH - Part 3

Paring: Calum Hood x Original Female Character

Word Count: 3.5k

Warnings: underage drinking, some swearing.

Author's note: this one is tiny, but it's dramatic.

The title for this one is from love you goodbye from one direction

read it on ao3

Series Masterlist

playlist

part 2 part 4

_______

I know you're saying you don't wanna hurt me, well maybe you should show a little mercy.

2013

“This is such a bad idea," Emma mumbles to herself while looking in the mirror. She's still getting ready, makeup on, trying to decide what to do with her hair. She's probably overdressed, she couldn't stop herself, but now the outfit along with the makeup is making her feel like she's trying too hard. Which she totally is. She doesn't want them to see the mess she had been without them around and she'd been dying to finally see them again. But she wasn't sure how to act around Calum anymore and she's been stressing about it since Michael told her about the concerts they were doing back home. They've been gone for almost a year now and she did keep up with them as well as she could, but things were still so undefined that she didn't know what to do or how to act.

She stops staring at her reflection, accepting she's never going to feel ready for the night, and makes her way out and to the house next door, anxiety making her heartbeat ring in her ears as she moves up the steps that lead to the porch.

She finally knocks, her mind going into flight mode, and she almost runs away, but then Michael opens the door, and she is throwing herself at him the second the door’s out of the way instead. She misses him so much. All of them really, but not having Michael next door has been hard. With her head on his chest, arms tightly wrapped around his waist while his own are around her shoulders, she feels a lot calmer.

"You're taller," she laughs, stepping into the house.

"I've always been tall. You’re the one getting shorter," he jokes and follows her and they barely make it into the room when she feels herself being pulled off the ground and she wraps her arms around Ashton’s neck.

"You do know I hate when people do that, don't you?" She smiles up at him when he puts her down.

"Yeah, but you love when it's me," she rolls her eyes and moves to hug Luke when Calum walks in and her breath gets caught in her throat.

"Hi, Em," Calum greets, voice small, and she closes her eyes for a second when she hears his voice, her heart beating at an erratic pace while she turns around to where the sound came from. He's moving towards her, seeming unsure, so she takes a step in his direction and opens her arms as he reaches her, throwing them around his waist the second he's within her reach. She breathes him in and lets the hug last longer than strictly necessary when he doesn’t pull away.

"I should've worn heels," she jokes, trying to make it seem like the situation isn't affecting her. She tells herself that all is well and that she can get through the night without freaking out. But she knows she needs to keep her distance so she moves away, towards the couch in the living room and Michael probably can tell what she's doing since he sits beside her, not leaving much space next to her, and starts asking questions. She talks about the last year at school, and they talk about their music and touring. Some other people arrive, and it turns into some form of a party, Michael's parents out for the night, music playing while people laugh. Emma follows either Michael or Ashton around, not wanting to be left on her own.

The night goes on, and someone gets a hold of beers and a bottle of vodka. She doesn't drink, but watches as the drinks slowly make their way to everyone's hands. She's in the kitchen talking to Michael, allegedly listening as he chats excitedly about something, but her focus is on a point slightly to the left of his head, where Calum is standing talking to some girls she doesn't recognize. He looks more confident than she's ever seen him and she couldn't stop watching him. She hates the way the easy smile on his face still makes her heart flutter.

She looks back at Michael trying to focus on what he's saying, but her eyes keep drifting back to Calum. And suddenly she can't take it anymore. She can't keep staring at him like that. Like the lack of contact hadn't hurt. Having him so close yet so far away is driving her crazy.

Something on her face must've given her thoughts away because Michael frowns at her with worry in his eyes and turns around and she takes the opportunity to move to the back of the house, disappearing from his sight while he tries to see what's happening.

He curses while turning back, seeing the back door closing and going after her.

Michael finds Emma sitting on the ground, hugging her knees, and sits on her side.

"Trouble?" His voice soft, afraid of what she'll do next. "Hey, look at me," he asks and she moves her head so she can look at him, tears rolling down her cheeks, "why are you crying?"

"I don't know. I guess I'm not as prepared for this as I wanted to believe," she half-smiles and sighs deeply.

"You know how he is. He’s not doing anything on purpose."

"I know he's not, but I wish he just talked to me. I can take it if he doesn't want me, but he doesn't talk to me anymore. I just wanna know where we stand." She's frustrated, and he can tell, but he doesn't know what to do about it either. So he just sits with her, holding her hand while her head it’s on his shoulder, and she plays with one of his bracelets until she's calmer.

When there are no more tears falling, she offers him a small smile.

"Can I steal this from you?" She asks, both hands on the bracelet she's been playing with, a black leather one.

"You’re asking me to let you steal something? That's not how stealing works, trouble," he laughs as he takes it off and puts it on her wrist.

"Thanks," she kisses his cheek and gets up, holding her hand out for him, "we should go back inside."

He takes her hand, and she smooths her free hand over the stain her tears had left on his sweater, sighing as he looks at it, and he squeezes her hand walking them back. She doesn't move from his side, her hand still holding his, until the thing dies down, leaving the house for the five of them.

They are all playing Guitar Hero in the living room and the scene is so familiar, she needs to get out so she wouldn't start crying again, going into the kitchen to catch her breath. She stays there for a while, enjoying the calm, and when she comes back, Calum is nowhere to be seen.

Taking a deep breath, she goes searching for him, finding him on Michael’s bed, staring at the ceiling in the dark.

"Are you okay?" She asks, leaning in the door frame.

"Yeah, just tired," he closes his eyes, and she begins to move out of the room. "Come here, we didn't get a chance to hang out tonight," he says, patting the bed next to him, moving to make space for her. Some part of her wants to go away, but he's asking for her and that outweighs everything else in her mind as she moves closer and lays on the bed, a couple of inches away from him, and he turns to face her. His eyes are intense, and she needs all her self-control not to do anything stupid. They stay there in silence for a couple of minutes until she can't take it anymore.

"It was nice coming here, I don't go out much now that you're all gone."

"We don't go out much over there too, mostly just writing and doing stupid things together."

"Sounds fun."

The conversation dies down, and she doesn't know what to do other than look at him, not really wanting to, but drinking in every piece of his face. He's still the most beautiful boy she's ever seen. And as he looks back at her, it doesn't feel as awkward. They've been there for a while, and as nothing happens, she decides that it's time to go home. She can't just look at him all night, she can't take it. She gets up but doesn't get far before his hand is on her wrist stopping her.

"Please don't leave me alone," he asks and pulls her back to the bed. The shock from the request makes her go back to where she was, but now he's holding her hand, and she feels like her body it's on fire. She's barely back in the bed when he lets go of her hand to cup her face and she can barely breathe as he looks at her.

"Emma," he whispers softly, before closing the distance between them and kissing her. She can taste the beer on his lips, and it takes her a moment to process what's happening. She doesn't move to kiss him back, the shock of kissing him again freezing her and he pulls away.

"So-" he begins to say, but she pulls him back, crushing her lips against his, and he's kissing her back, his hands pulling her closer as she loses herself in him.

She doesn't know how long it's passed when he pulls away and holds her close to his chest. The last thing she remembers it's the warmth from his arms, making her feel like that was the best place in the world.

____

The light coming from the window wakes Emma, and she knows she's not in her bed. With her eyes still closed, she can feel she still has her boots on. But what really makes her want to keep her eyes closed, makes her not want reality to hit, it's the set of arms holding her and the soft breath she can feel on her hair. So she lets herself stay there, just for a moment, before slowly moving Calum's arms and getting out of the bed, taking a second to look back at the bed, at how Calum’s peaceful and unaware that she's not there anymore, before walking out. She wonders what he'll think when he wakes up to the empty bed. She wonders if he'll say something about the night before even though she knows he won't.

She makes her way to the living room, and it's about to let herself out when she spots Michael on the couch in a position that looks so uncomfortable that she feels the need to tell him to move.

She kneels in front of him and tries to be as soft as she can as she tries to wake him, knowing he hates when people disrupt his sleep.

"M?" She says, shaking him a little, "Michael! " She says a little louder, finally getting him to move. He blinks at her in confusion, sleepy green eyes not really focusing. "You should go claim your bed back or at least move, so you don't end up in a whole lot of pain when you wake up later."

He finally registers her and sits, looking at the girl on the floor in front of him. "You look a mess," he laughs at her rubbing his eyes.

"Gee, thanks,” she rolls her eyes at him, ”I didn't exactly plan on falling asleep with a full face of makeup on," she knows her hair is still somewhat decent since it's still up, but the makeup is probably all over her face by now.

"What happened? I thought you had to be home before dawn," he yawns and she frowns, going back to last night as she sits on the floor.

"I did, but Cal didn't let me leave when I tried, so we fell asleep," she explains, scratching her neck and he smirks at her, raising a questioning eyebrow, and she knows what he's thinking. "God, your mind’s dirty. Nothing happened, okay? I mean, he kissed me, but nothing more happened," she explains and he raises his hands in defense

"Good, I don't want to have to burn my bed," he says, the grin turning into a laughing fit. She shoves his legs trying to get him to stop but his reaction is making her laugh too.

"I really need to go though. I need to be in bed before my mum wakes up."

He gets up and pulls her with him, walking to the door with her.

"I'm sorry I woke you, but your neck didn't seem happy," she says as she buries her face in his chest and throws her arms around his waist. "I missed you," she tightens her grip on him, and he kisses the top of her head.

"I missed you too, babe."

She walks out and makes her way to the house next door, taking her boots off on the porch and trying to be as silent as possible as she opens the door and goes to her room.

As she sits in the bed, taking her makeup off, she tries not to overthink everything as her mind keeps going back to Calum, the way he grabbed her hand when she stood up, the "please don't leave me alone," and him pulling her back. She tries to stop thinking about it when she finally declares herself ready to sleep, but she can't help but feel like something is missing as she hugs one of her pillows.

______

The rest of the day goes by in a haze, and on the next day, when Ashton tells Emma they are on their way, she's buzzing in excitement. She's waiting on the porch, and when the car shows up, she jumps to her feet and practically hops to the car, knowing she probably looks like an excited puppy, but not being able to control herself as she's beaming at the chance to go with them.

She gets in the far back, next to Michael, Luke, and Calum in front of her and Ashton in the front.

She waves at all the boys and tries to control herself, so she isn't bouncing her leg as much. They look amused by her, and she almost doesn't feel the effects of being around Calum, pretending that her heart is beating so fast over the excitement, not the fact that he's right in front of her.

"Trouble, stop bouncing, you're making me nervous," Michael laughs as he places a hand on her knee to try and get her to stop. So she pulls her feet up in the seat, crossing her legs under her.

"I'm sorry, but this is exciting." She's smiling wide as she starts to ask random questions about everything that goes into a concert that big.

She follows them around the venue, staying with the crew when they do the soundcheck. Calum is back to avoiding her and she can’t help but start getting annoyed at his attitude. When he disappears after they have everything set up, she tries to search for him.

Emma finds him sitting alone on a small couch in a common area, taking in the few chairs and the desk on the corner before exhaling and stepping inside the room.

"We should talk," Emma says, walking through the door but unable to make herself move closer to him. She is nervous, but she's got nothing to lose at this point.

"About?" Calum asks, locking his phone to look at her, his laid-back attitude making her even more anxious.

"About what happened at M's," it takes everything in her to say the words she wants.

"What's to talk about?" He asks and she feels like he's playing dumb, and it's just making her angry.

"Come on, don't do that. You can't walk out on me, ignore me, kiss me, then ignore me some more," she argues, as she gets closer to where he's sitting.

"You are getting things wrong," he tells her, his expression a careful picture of calmness.

"I'm getting things wrong?" She scoffs, the anger catching up to her, "me? You kissed me, Hood. You know how I feel, and you want me to interpret how?"

"Why are you always overanalyzing shit?"

"Because you didn't even say goodbye to me!" She exclaims and he flinches at her words but quickly returns to the controlled look while she continues to speak. "Then you come back and kiss me like everything is like before, and I want to know what the hell you want from me."

"I want you to stop overthinking everything," he replies. He's so composed she wants to start screaming, just to see if she can get a reaction.

"You can't keep doing this to me, I just wanna know what it means," she says, stopping in front of him.

"Why does it have to mean anything, Emma?" He asks, looking up at her.

"So it means nothing," she states, taking a few steps back away from him.

"I thought you'd be over it by now," he shrugs nonchalantly and she huffs.

"Oh, so you like to go around kissing people who you think are over you out of nowhere? Got it." She's fighting angry tears now, and he stands from his place on the couch, walking closer to her.

"Well, you do need to get over it," he half shrugs and there's a flash of hurt in his eyes, but it's gone so quickly Emma thinks she's imagining it. Looking up at him at that moment is making her feel defenseless. Small. And that just makes her angrier.

"I can't just turn it off like you did!" She exclaims, fighting the urge to physically shove him away. "But I was fine, then you kissed me. Why? Just to mess with my head?" She fights, glaring at him with such anger while stepping closer to him that he takes a step back.

“It’s not-" he tries to defend himself.

“Are you over me?” She interrupts him and the question seems to take him by surprise.

“Over you?” He stutters, blinking at her, seeming unsure of what to do next for the first time since she walked in.

“I don't believe you never felt the same way I do. You thought I was over you, does that mean you’re over me?”

“I-” he starts, frozen in place and she notices how close he is now.

“Answer me,” she begs, looking up to meet his eyes, bottom lip quivering, and she watches as his expression gets carefully put back into indifference.

"It was just a kiss, Emma. No deeper meaning to it," he says, coldly. There's something in his eyes she can't read, but she doesn't want to do this anymore.

"Right," she takes a step back, pursing her lips, looking away from him as her eyes start to water and she turns in her heels." Got it," she says, already halfway out the door, not seeing as Calum's facade crumbles, and he drops back on the couch, head in his hands.

She's angry, but she doesn’t know why she expected something good to come of that. In her rage, she almost just leaves, but she spots Michael and forces herself not to do something she will regret. She breathes deep to calm down, trying to put on the best performance of her life.

"Trouble?" Michael asks, voice careful.

"I gotta go," she says, her voice low, and she could've played it as tiredness if he didn't know her so well.

"Already?" He asks, watching her carefully, trying to read her.

"Something came up, and I just wanna get home," she says with a shrug, eyes watering and he frowns, knowing she’s not telling him everything, but she doesn't give him time to question, throwing her arms around his shoulders and standing on her tiptoes hugging him as tight as she can when he hugs her back. "I love you," she says and kisses his cheek.

"I love you too," he frowns at her, "trouble, wait, what happened?" He asks as she pulls away, grabbing her hand to stop her from running.

"I just need to get out of here," she breathes. She can't take it anymore, she needs to leave before she breaks.

"Emma," she barely registers that he called her by her name, "why?" He asks, insistent, and she's about to crack, but she can't let her feelings out in front of him, not about this.

"It’s not important. I gotta go. I'll miss you, M, tell the guys I’m sorry I had to go." She squeezes his hand while letting it go and turns away, leaving him standing there.

She starts running once she's out of the venue and doesn't stop until she's home. She doesn't let herself think about it until she's hiding in the bathroom. She'll get over it. She just doesn't know how.

_____

taglist: @lxnelyhearrt

this one had an alternative title "The hardest thing I'll ever do is walk away still loving you." from somebody that you loved by Bruno Martini and New Hope Club, but i couldn't pass on the chance of having a 1D song in the 2013 chapter aoskaoskoaksoaks

#5sos fic #calum hood fic #i dont know how to tag fics #so yeah #mywriting #catch22 #calum hood fanfic #calum hood x oc #5 seconds of summer fanfic #part 4 will be up tomorrow #i wanted to post this earlier but my computer had given up on me and i wanted to put the set from the celebration out before posting this #then i had to edit it and all that #but its here lol #if see these tags and read all 3 parts come ask me if something in this actually happened cuz this is highly based on my first love #or dont i cant tell you what to do soaksokaoskas #i gotta stop talking in tags #goodbye

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