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#lucifer!jk is just too sexy
pierrot-bly · 1 year
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Ranking Obey Me Characters By How Down Bad I Am For Them
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Pairings: N/A
Characters: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor, Diavolo, Barbatos, Simeon, Solomon
Genre: Crack
Warnings: Horny Brainrot
1. Satan
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I love this cat boy almost as much as I love Obey Me. He is a snarky, angry blond and I'm here for it. Please sir slap me and spit in my mouth ilysm istg
2. Diavolo
A sweet himbo who has canonically told MC he wants to kidnap them and keep them locked up forever? Sign me up. Sir, I will willingly stay forever, just ask smh. Please bend me in half and blow my back out until I have your babies jk jk unless...
3. Beelzebub
Another sweet himbo who could snap me in half. He loves food, I love food, we have so much in common. I got something else he can eat wink wink
4. Mammon
Another himbo, but plot twist, I wanna snap him in half. I just wanna make him feel so good he cries, I'll give him the world. He's bad with money, I'm bad with money, we have so much in common wow
5. Belphegor
Besides being a tiny murder muffin, I wanna make him ride me and cry from exhaustion. Lovingly bullying him, ya know? He's cute but I'm a little hung up on the murder still smh
6. Solomon
Shady magic man? Sign me up. I bet he fucks while experimenting with magic on you. As long as he doesn't offer to cook afterwards, I can rock his world
7. Leviathan
Finally a bottom I can be more confident than. Literally we'd both be a mess just holding hands so unless we have hand sex 👉👌 I don't think we'd do anything
8. Barbatos
Scary but kinda in a sexy way. He's way too good for me. I'd be honored if he was down but he's like perfect so I'd just be insecure the whole time
9. Asmodeus
Personally I'm just platonically into him. I would bestie fuck just once with him tho
10. Simeon
I love corrupting religious boys as much as the next but not him. Again just platonic feels for him and I couldn't see myself doing that with him
11. Lucifer
He'd make me cry and probably have a breakdown. Also Satan supremacy, sorry old man
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chateautae · 3 years
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HEAD IN HANDS THE SCENE AT THE STRIP CLUB...... THE TEASING. fuck I have so many thoughts about lucifer jungkook!!!!!! Sammy... you're such a talented writer that you don't need a beta, bestie!!!! THAT WAS ALL YOU!!! and it's amazing FUCK!!!!
I have thoughts but for now, I'm distracted and gotta think about this sentence because it's my current state of BEING right now:
Fuck, can I squish my face between his pecs? 
MOONNN BABY!! PLEASE IM SO FUCKING STOKED YOU READ THE STORY I'm so happy lucifer!jk made you feel like this!!! THANK GOD i was thinking without a beta it would read terribly but I'm so so glad that wasn't the case 😭 TYSM FOR READING MY LOVE and please, oc is literally all of us thinking about Jungkook </3
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marquisoforder · 3 years
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Ranking the Nine Princes of Hell from TSC from the least to most sexy
(Technically 8 cause Lucifer is just a chair but eh)
8) Coming in at dead last we have Asmodeus cause I hate this generic white man energy he’s giving here. He’s the demon of Lust cause the only way he could get bitches was by tricking and manipulating them. He’s serving Frankenstein’s Monster had a baby with a CEO from a yaoi hentai realness here. The Worst of the Demons? More like the Worst Dressed of the demons! Black tie with a white suite? 🤮Sir are you out of your goddamn mind? Did Raphael bonk you on the head until your fashion sense left? -1/10 you are simply hideous sir
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7) Coming in at number 7 we have Mammon looking like Jeff Bezos’s capitalistic wet dream. How are you literally all about money but still look tacky as hell? This man shows up to the MET Gala in a tux with no effort whatsoever I can just feel it in my bones. All these eyes but you still couldn’t locate a better fit. I was gonna ask why he looks constipated but then I read the part where he eats blood and gold for every meal so he’s obviously suffering from indigestion. (And it shows king, it really shows) 0/10 - Do fucking better and get a plastic surgery or a proper diet with all the money you are hoarding up
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6) At number six we’ve got Belphegor. Honestly I’d have ranked him much higher if it wasn’t for the goat skull situation going on there like what’s up with that king? Is this a political statement? Or are you just taking covid precautions? Either way I can’t rank you higher than six with that face. (Even tho the body is definitely 1. Like you mean to tell me a demon with abs like those is the demon of laziness? He ain’t lazy if he’s grinding in the gym which he apparently is cause he’s legit shredded.) also kinda cute that you were married to a mortal. Maybe if they pegged you you wouldn’t have denounced the institution of marriage. (Try it next time. I’m certainly up if you are 👀 haha jk unless 😳) 5/10 - Sorry about your goat head
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5) On the position of number five we have the one and only Leviathan! He’s not a fallen angel! He’s not like other girls! He’s edgy, he’s sensitive, he’s sad, nobody understands him. He kins Ebony Dementia Darkness Raven Way. But in a sexy way. I like what you’ve done with the hair. Paired with completely black eyes he’s essentially the perfect Scene Boy™️ from back in the day. He would have been Tumblr famous. Even now he has the capacity to become one of Tumblr’s sexy man (derogatory) cause he has the same vibe as Jotun Loki. 6/10 - No Comments cause I’m worried he might actually just eat me.
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4) Belial is number four cause while he’s definitely good looking there’s something about him that screams I’d Mansplain Your Own Period To You. Probably invested in Bitcoin and trying to overheat the planet to death. Not gonna lie whatever he’s doing with his hands is actually giving model, it’s giving Timothy chalamet, it’s giving white boy who paints nails and wears rings and doesn’t shut up about it. The hair is actually really cool and I wish my hair looked that effortlessly good. Whatever hair products you stole from Brad Mondo, I want some rn 😤 6.5/10 - idk still kinda basic tho
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3) Moving on to the top three we have Azazel! I liked him when we saw him in TMI. He’s giving fuck boy archie andrews here. Probably says baby girl unironically. Are his pants sagging or are they two toned? That’s a secret he’ll never tell. The reason he was cast down from hell is actually because god was jealous of that one lock of hair that falls perfectly across his forehead. His nails are done, his hair is perfect, his abs look rock hard. All in all has that all-American rugged good looks to him. 7/10- red hair actually looks good on you king keep it up
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2) Our runner up is none other than Astaroth! Look at that serve! Look me in the eyes and tell me this man doesn’t belong on the cover of a cheap erotica novel about fallen angels!!! The glance downwards, the wings bared, the contrast of the red cloth with the black wings!! He did not come to play because for Astaroth, the world is a runaway and he’s a model. The luscious hair and the sexy torso scars truly sets this man apart. I’m not big on selling my soul but for you king, I’d fr put that shit on eBay for 50 cents. You think you were misjudged and pleads your case? Lemme be your defense attorney king, I’ll fight God in a Denny’s parking lot for you no questions asked. 9/10 - Unlike Belphegor I still believe in the institution of marriage so ahahaha 👀😌 iykwim
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1) And finally our top boy from Hell is… none other than Samael himself! That cute lil feather on the hat paired with that Jack sparrow red scarf really shows he knows how to work a fit. The rolled up sleeves got me 👀 at his forearms like I’m a Victorian man seeing a bit of ankle. This demon legit looks like a man young Taylor Swift would write a song about. He’s young, he’s hip, he probably has a fashion tiktok and does mad transitions from outfit to outfit. 10/10 wouldn’t do this man’s sexiness justice cause he’s simply too sexy for such a trivial scale.
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simeonisalesbian · 3 years
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The Brothers and Dance
I noticed that in the dance battles Belphie’s sprite looks like he’s doing a couple of ballet moves and I just spiraled from there. I haven’t actually taken a dance class in a few years and the last few I did were only theater, lyrical, and ballet so don’t quote me on some of this stuff lmao. 
And as always enjoy :3
Lucifer:
You’d think the classical man would like ballet but he is actually really fond of Jazz. 
Specifically the Fosse style of jazz. It is actually extremely hard to hit the poses just right to get those clean motions and Lucifer definitely likes the challenge.
I do think he enjoys most dance forms. I can’t see him doing any sort of hip hop number though.
Mammon:
Boy loves tap dancing.
He doesn't know any of the moves by name but one of the fun things about tap dancing is that it is more focused on the sounds your feet make. 
So despite all logic Mammon is somehow able to mimic choreography by sound alone. No one understands how no even him.
He’s really also a big fan of hip hop since it's more of a freestyle dance.
He hates ballet. There are too many words he doesn’t understand. It's slow and boring. Puts him right to sleep honestly.
Leviathan:
K-Pop dances. Thats it.
Jk he’s hard simply because he probably doesn’t like dancing to normie songs. 
However from experience you can have a solo from music from a video game and it would be considered a musical theater solo.
So jot him now for musical theater and let him go hog wild with his little vocaloid dances lmao.
 (Now that I’ve said this please note that he knows the whole dance to Luka Luka Night Fever)
He just doesn’t want to dance to any normie songs. If anime has a style of dance he will learn that style. So he really doesn’t hate any sort of style.
Satan: 
He gives off modern/contemporary vibes. 
Specifically the kind that’s very expressive and deep in some sort of weird way that goes right over my head. 
No I do not understand why you’re trying to be a funky dying tree but go off I guess. 
He also prefers more modern style jazz so he doesn’t like Lucifer's classy jazz movements. They will both fight over which one is better.
Asmodeus:
He has two moods. Pretty graceful lyrical style of fun club hip hop style. He can fuckin slay at lyrical simply because the beauty and grace almost matches his own. 
But he’s also a fun sexy party boy ya know. You know.
Would never dare try pointe dancing because that shit can actually damage your feet so despite it being a really pretty style he is not touching those shoes.
Beelzebub:
My gut instinct says he’d like Hip hop but I have no idea why. It might be type casting tbh he looks like he’d dance hip hop the big boy he his.
So probably like a jazzy hip hop mix. 
Soft boy would also probably do ballet with his twin though. He’s just really supportive since his twin is finally doing something active ^.^
 It’s also a really good workout.
He’d have a hard time with styles like lyrical. He doesn’t have anything against it he just has a hard time doing the pretty fluid movements like asmo does.
Belphegor:
Ballet with a bit of lyrical mixed in simply cus sometimes the structure is too much. 
He does like doing bar work for some sort of exercise when he can't sleep. 
Going through the repetitive motions in each of the five positions is calming. 
He is also really good at Fouettés and has done so many in one point that he made mammon dizzy. (which was definitely the intent.)
He doesn’t like Tap or Clog simply because the noises are too loud and too much and he can't focus.
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diavolosthots · 4 years
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I am once asking for you hcs. Lolol jk, but what about a horror artist! mc who's shy about showing their art but gets confident enough to show the brothers their drawings of their demon form, or just them in general your choice!
Oof i like the demon form idea so imma go with that
THE BROTHERS with a horror!artist MC drawing their demon forms
Lucifer:
Oof insecure about your drawings? His drawing looks immaculate my dear, you even caught the details in his horns. Impressive.
Mammon:
Listen he'll find something to criticize but thats only so he can cover up the blush thats spreading across his cheeks because you drew HIM
Leviathan:
Another one who will blush. You took the time to draw him? Like not just him but HIM. The actual him. Thats so sweet. He might have to draw you too now
Satan:
Awe that is actually super sweet. Here let him compare you to the most beautiful lines in his books. Sit down. This will take a while.
Asmodeus:
Oh wait you gotta get those pants ~juuuussst~ right. Actually. Just leave them off. He's a sexy demon and the clothes just take away from his beauty. But also please give him a flowery background
Beelzebub:
He feels so special no cap like you could draw a stick figure and he thinks its beautiful. You outdid yourself bb
Belphegor:
Also feels pretty special but if you don't add his pillow to the drawing he will say it aint correct. Still pretty nice though!
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directionergleekblr · 4 years
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If you have songs you want to recommend I’d be happy to listen to them🥰oh, that sounds interesting! I really hope I get to read more once Uni stops being so stressful -.- It’s a fantasy novel about a „witcher“ who chases magical creatures who pose a threat to humans. I really love the humour in the book xDD!! What really? I liked the twilight books too… I wonder how her writing has changed cause it’s been like 10 years?? 😳Do you have anything fun planned for the weekend? ^-^ take care ❤
Lol I have a list of recommendations 😂😂 jk probably a few songs lol for bts I would recommend fire, blood sweat and tears, mic drop, pied piper, Dionysus, we on, silver spoon, dope, dimples, mirokosmos, je mai vous, butterfly, August d (which is just an amazing rap) cypher 4, go go, and outro tear. For ateez I would recommend wonderland, pirate king, thank u, dancing like butterfly wings, promise, precious, say my name, answer, horizon, and desire. For black pink it would be stay, kill this love, boombiya, playing with Fire, and ddu ddu ddu. For super m it would be jopping, can’t stand the rain and black car. For super junior it would be ticki tocki, crown, sexy free and single, 2ya2yao, super clap, black suit, and I think I. For shinee I would highly recommend ring ding dong, Lucifer and Sherlock (those are awesome). For nct I would recommend black on black, boss, kick it, go, riding and rolling, touch, regular (both English and Korean versions are amazing), there’s a sub unit called wayv and I would recommend moonwalk and love talk lol and that’s about all I can remember ❤️❤️ how stressful is uni for you? What year are you in and what are you studying? Now that book sounds amazing is there a series or only a few books of the Witcher? I shall add that to my list of books to buy and read lmao thanks love!! And in terms of twilight idk but shall be interesting to read that’s for sure 😂😂 now the question is were you team Edward or team Jacob?? Lmao as for the weekend I don’t have much planned do some colouring, some reading, see what needs to be done around the house, maybe a work out or two but that’s about it we shall see what happens lol wbu? What are your plans for the weekend? Talk soon love!!
Your secret monmirer
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chateautae · 2 years
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Before I start barking,
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I'm so excited for everything that's gonna be up, but THE CHOKEHOLD THIS DEMON-DAMN FIC HAS ON ME IS SO TIGHT I JUST CANT F-ING BREATHE-
Like, just, JUST, have a look at this:
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I'VE LOST COUNT.
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Like the way I SCREAMED SO LOUD AFTER I SCROLLED DOWN ANS SAW THIS:
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and then got yelled at even louder by mum
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LIKEEEEEEEEE DO YOU EVEN REALISE-
I NEVER GO SO GAGA OVER ANYTHING, NOT EVEN WHEN I GOT INTO UNI, then WHY DID THIS ✎ EMOTICON MAKE ME SCREAM SO loud -
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And finally came up with this.
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AND HERES A FEW EDITS THAT REMIND ME OF THIS FIC A LOT THAN IT PROBABLY SHOULD.MAKES ME HORNY TOO BUT THATS JUST TMI THAT I'VE JUST GIVEN OUT.
https://pin.it/3JEdhmX
(IK IT ISNT THE ALL BLACK OUTFIT BUT-)
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https://pin.it/BA70OaC
THE SONG JUST SETS UP THE MOOD-
https://pin.it/4NIJBiq
THIS ONE IS JUST-
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Like imagine if the SONG WAS IN HIS VOICE TOO THEN I'D JUST-
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But also, the amount of talent he has to choreograph this song with those steps. Like god HIS ABILITIES ARE UNMATCHED. AND YOU SAMMY CAUGHT UP REAL GOOD WITH HOW HE WANTED TO COME OFF AND GAVE MY BRAIN A SHORT CIRCUIT-
I just love it when it's either ppl talking about this fic, because it still has so much to convey but the characters are so well written SOMEONE MIGHT AS WELL MAKE A NETFLIX SERIES-
I'm so so looking forward to this, but DONT RUSH ANYTHING, LIKE YOU DONT HAVE TO FOR ANYONE LMAO. I'M JUST HERE TO SCREAM THE REMAINING CRIES I COULDN'T BARK OUT LOUD COZ OF MY MUM.
LOVE YOU SAMMY💗💖💗 Muah Muah. Take care and STAY HYDRATED.
AHAHHHHHHH IM SO GLAD YOU LOVE HOTTER THAN HELL MY LOVES!! And whew yes that banner is just so sexy and it's all thanks to sol @jamaisjoons the wonderful talent 😌 Hehe yes i'm starting to work on the second part because in my opinion it's got such good plot I can't wait to write out!! WAHH TYSM FOR YOUR EXCITEMENT AND ENTHUSIASM IT REALLY MAKES ME FEEL MOTIVATED TO WRITE i'm glad lucifer jk can make you feel this way. You take care as well loves and OFC I SHALL KEEP YOU BARKING WITH THE NEXT CHAPTER!!! 💓💓💓
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chateautae · 3 years
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Ooooohh!! Hi Sammy!! :> I see you simpin over Mr. Min Yoongi... 😬 excited to read your new JK demon fic eeeiiik!!! i am lowkey looking forward for a Yoongi fic, cuz u lowkey simpin too. *wink wink*
YESS lucifer!jk is actually finished and dropping this Friday or Saturday 🥰 PLEASE I BEEN simping over Mr. Min Yoongi that man has always had my heart 🤧 I’ve always loved Yoongi’s personality and he’s just the goddamn cutest and goofiest man on earth I will never grow past his gummy smile and boopable nose and cat-like eyes but then he has a sexy brain and raps like a fucking G. YOONGI’S RAPPING IS MY FAVE MAN Y’ALL BETTER EXPECT THAT TONGUE TECHNOLOGY TO COME SOON 😝
Who tf isn’t in love with min yoongi??? I SCREAM EVERY TIME HE EVEN BLINKS WHY IS EVERYTHING HE DOES SO FUCKING CUTE 😭😭😭
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chateautae · 2 years
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sammy my love!! i forgot to tell you that im fully caught up on all of your works and im just so in awe!! first, im so glad to see hotter than hell jk again!! im down bad for that man and id fold so quick for him, im serious😮‍💨 the tension was BUBBLING in the car scene and im going crazy!! THE SECOND HOTTER THAN HELL JK GOES DOWN ON OC IS WHEN IM GONNA LOSE THE REMAINING BITS OF MY MIND!!! aghh i can’t wait to read the next part!! were both of their minds erased and how?? are they soulmates that will keep finding each other despite what happens to them? ALSO I NEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE NIGHTMARE THINGY!! I HAVE SO MANY THEORIES AND QUESTIONS!! AGH PART II WENT CRAZY AND THIS SERIES IS TOO GOOD!! IM HOOKED!! (also i dont know if you know about jujutsu kaisen, but for some reason i just could not stop picturing hotter than hell jk having the same marks as sukuna?? 😩)
I also read the joon fic and i almost choked my GOD!! IT WAS TOO HOT STOP. ive been down bad for joon and his big body and sexy brain and that fic just 🤌🏼🤌🏼 prof joon is too hot and i needed three business days to process it😭 the roughness of prof joon really did it for me🫣
ALSO THE HOBI FIC?? THE FACT THAT HOBI WAS GONNA END OC’S LIFE RIGHT THERE BUT GOT MORE THAN HE BARGAINED FOR?? 🫣 SAMMY, THIS WAS SUCH A UNIQUE PLOT, I WOULD NOT MIND READING A WHOLE SERIES ABOUT THESE TWO
AND THE MID DRABBLES?? PLS😭😭 DID I ALMOST CRY THINKING ABOUT TAE RUSHING OUT FROM A MEETING TO BE WITH OC AND MAKE SURE SHES OKAY?? YES. DID I CRY THINKING ABOUT THEIR CUTE SON RUNNING AROUND AND THAT HUG BETWEEN THE THREE OF THEM?? YES. GOSH I WAS SO SOFT😭 IM GLAD THE MID BABIES HAVE MORE CONTENT COMING UP BC I MISSED THEM SO BAD OMG😭😭 IF I COULD I WOULD PROTECT THEM WITH MY LIFE
AND THE YOONGI FIC???? IM TELLING YOU SAMMY, IDK HOW YOU DO IT, BUT YOU BUILD TENSION FLAWLESSLY IN EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FICS!! YOUR STORYTELLING ABILITY IS ALWAYS SO CAPTIVATING AND IT LEAVES ME SQUIRMING!!! I ALMOST FORGOT THAT THEY WERE IN AN ELEVATOR AND WHEN YOONGI WAS ALL LIKE ‘we’re not done yet’ AND TALKED ABOUT RUINING HIS PLACE?? PANTING. IM PANTING SAMMY😮‍💨
ALL OF THESE FICS REALLY WERE A HUGE HIGHLIGHT TO MY DAYS AND IM NOT ONLY FEELING RATHER HOT AND HEAVY, BUT IM ALSO JUST SO IN AWE!! you’re so so talented and i hope you know that im genuinely one of your biggest fans and supporters!! thank you for all of the content that you put out😭 you work so hard, and your passion and love that you put into your craft really shows in all of your fics! you rlly do inspire me to work harder, sammy🥹
OVERALL, ABSOLUTELY LOVED EVERY FIC THAT YOU PUT OUT!! IM GLAD I FINALLY CAUGHT UP AND I CANT WAIT FOR THE NEW MID DRABBLE!! 💜
-🪐
HELLOOO SATURN ANON I AM SO SO SORRY FOR MY LATE ASS REPLY!! I was stuck at work because i finally quit my job (YASS 🎉🎉🎉) but my horrible manager retaliated by giving me 4 long closing shifts in a row RIGHT during finals time where i'm the supervisor and continued to bully me throughout all the shifts... it's been a lovely few days for me 😀 anywhooo let me reply to your lovely feedback babes!!!
FJWOEIFNOWO SPEAKING OF HOTTER THAN HELL JK GOING DOWN ON OC... YOU'RE IN FOR A TREAT THE NEXT CHAPTER THAT'S ALL IM SAYING!! I'm so so glad you loved the tension, that was my number 1 concern!! GOODBYEEEE yes yes i would love to hear your theories babes like i’m genuienly going ham with the backstory for this fic dwwoidenoawi and hELLO??? YES YES YES TO IMAGINING SUKUNA like idc that man is hot as hell,,, IMAGINE LUCIFER JK HAVING THE MARKINGS!! IMAGINE LUCIFER JK HAVING SOMETHING LIKE A DOMAIN EXPANSION AND IT LOOKS LIKE SUKUNA’S MALEVOLENT SHRINE DOWJEDPIO (ahem btw my fave character is my man fushiguro what about yours saturn anon 👀) 
YASSS tysm for reading bubs i just couldn’t get the idea of prof joon out of my head and the second i told my sister she freaked out and begged me to write it so it happened <33 joon really has me down bad for his big body and sexy brain like sir who gave you the permission 😣
AHH I’M SO GLAD YOU LOVED THE HOBI FIC!! It literally just randomly popped into my head when I was dreaming and then I remembered hobi bias-wrecking me in LA and i was like wait,,, what if he literally catches her in the act?? I GOT OUT OF BED IMMEDIATELY AND STARTED DRAFTINGOWEDOI
PLEASE I MISSED THEM TOO and ugh i love them the most for comfort. I couldn’t help but write our mid babies as parents either because they’re really just the softest family <33
GOODBYEEEE SATURN ANON THIS IS SO SO SWEET OF YOU?? Ugh everything you just said has literally always been my concerns with writing, I stress over tension and story-building a lot so I’m so so happy to hear that it delivers!!! 
AHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING AND ALL THIS LOVELY FEEDBACK MY LOVE!!! Seriously your support means the world to me and I couldn’t have asked for anything more, I’m so so grateful for you saturn anon you always manage to turn my heart into mush and always make my day better!!! YES YES NEW MID DRABBLE IN THE WORKS AND WILL COME AS SOON AS I CAN!!
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