#losing my MIND rn y’all don’t even KNOW | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

worldlxvlys · 3 months

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can you do a fic where chris and reader are dating and reader interacts with all the edits of chris on tiktok and fangirls with the chris girls.

TIK TOK

chris sturniolo x reader

warnings: cursing, sexual jokes

a/n: i kinda love this, i don’t think i’ve ever seen anyone do a tik tok social au before

lmk what you think

**click yes to actually watch the edits**

WATCH VIDEO?

yes scroll

COMMENTS:

@ y/n

good LORD THAT MAN IS FINE 😩

@lustfulslxt

oh i’m DRENCHED

y/n -> the sturniolo police abt to get ur ass (same)

@flowerxbunnie

suddenly i’m on my knees 🫠

y/n -> literally me

@sturnssx

y/n is so lucky but idk if i wanna be her or chris more

y/n -> i’d want myself too honestly (i’m kidding i love chris)

@mattslolita

why is he not in my bed rn ??

y/n -> sorry bae he’s in mine ✌🏾i’ll tell him to go visit u later !

@its-jennarose

HOW IS HE REAL?

y/n -> the way that i genuinely ask myself this question on a daily basis

@sophssturn

GOD DAYUM 😨

y/n -> fr like who does bro think he is ??

@bernardsleftbootycheek

THIS IS CRAZY GOOD

y/n -> idk which is crazier, your username or this edit ( both eat tho)

@queen161718

the fact that y/n is always just lurking in the comment sections of chris edits absolutely takes me out 😭😭

y/n -> gotta support my man and his talented ass fansss

@cupidsword

i need him BAD

y/n -> same (i already have him)

@imwetforyourmom

i just need one chance 😫

y/n -> nah bae, he’s got a brother thooo !

WATCH VIDEO?

yes scroll

COMMENTS:

@ y/n

his hair is really nice 🤭

@evieolo -> I’M SAYINGGGGG

@nickmillersn1gf

it always looks so soft and fluffyyyy

@mbbsgf -> if he ever shaved it off i would cry

y/n -> you and me both sis

@mattsneezing

yesss, i love my husband’s hairrrr 😍

y/n -> aren’t you a matt girl ?? where’s your sense of loyalty ??

@chrisstankyleg

my man is looking FINE

y/n -> girl, i don’t know how to tell you this…

@sturniolobltch

even the paparazzi is obsessed with his hair

@sturniolowhore -> can’t even blame them

@bethsturn -> he’s just so 😫

@ y/n -> you guys get it

@bernardenjoyer

biting my phone rn

y/n -> glad i’m not the only one !

@rac00ns-are-c00l4

long hair chris >>>

@ y/n -> NO FR, IDK WHY HE KEEPS CUTTING IT

WATCH VIDEO ?

yes. scroll.

COMMENTS.

@ y/n

MY MAN MY MAN MY MANNNNN

@chrisloyalgf

it’s a good day to be a chris girl

y/n -> it’s a good day to be chris’s girl

@urmom2bitch

HIS FINGERS GOOD LORD

@ y/n -> they’re long as hellll 😋

@defnotayonna -> wdym by that 🤨

@ssturniolo

chris girls, how y’all doing ??

y/n -> I’M LOSING MY MIND RN

@judespoision

i’m just a sturniolo girl atp

y/n -> AS YOU SHOULDDDD

@ y/n

HELP CHRIS JUST ASKED ME WHY THIS AUDIO HAS BEEN REPLAYING FOR SO LONG

@blueeyedbesson -> not you watching chris edits while you’re with him 😭

@ y/n -> THEY’RE SO ADDICTING

@hearts4chriss -> oh hey boo tell my man i said hey 😛

@ y/n -> oh is matt your man now ??

@ hearts4chriss -> …girl don’t play with me

@chrisstopherfilmed

GRIPPING MY SHEETS RN

@starsturniolo -> he’s so fineeeee 😩

@robins-scoop -> LIKE WHY ISN’T THIS MAN IN MY BED ??

@ y/n -> sorry y’all he’s in mine !

WATCH VIDEO ?

yes. no.

COMMENTS

@ y/n

PERIODDD YOU CLEARED SHOWING THIS TO CHRIS IMMEDIATELY

@ y/n

damnnn me and flo milli twinninggg 🤞🏾

@ christophersturniolo -> oh look at that it’s night

@readerakayourname -> CHRIS 😭

@fandomhopped -> he’s so real for that honestly

@ y/n

i’m absolutely obsessed with that first clip

@yamamasjumpercables -> i want this edit engraved in my brain

@ y/n -> no LITERALLY

@ineedchriscock

i’d let him choke me any day

@ y/n -> where is your self respect 😧 ( literally same )

@luverboychris

the only person’s babies i’d carry

@ y/n -> WHAT 😭😭 (real)

WATCH VIDEO ?

yes. no.

COMMENTS

@ y/n

his frat boy era will be missed 😔🙏

@rootbeerworshiper -> frat boy chris >>>>>

@ y/n

song choice >>>>>

@ christophersturniolo -> i wanna watch u get naked !

@ y/n -> then come over ???

@patscorner -> oh !

@junnniiieee07 -> ik those are the lyrics but i don’t think they’re joking 😭

@ y/n -> 🤫

@chr1sgirl4life -> THAT’S MY MAN MY MAN MY MANNNN 😍

@breeloveschris -> incorrect that’s MY man !

@ y/n -> idk how to tell y’all this…

@nicksmainbitch

this audio choice was the best decision you could’ve ever made

@vanteguccir -> this song is so chris coded

@55sturn -> frat boy chris + this song 😩

@mayhem-72 -> his smirk ?? are we kidding ??

@ y/n -> bros ego is INFLAMMED

he ain’t even the fart fr

WATCH VIDEO ?

yes. no.

COMMENTS

@ y/n

BODY ROCK OH I WANNA FEEL YOUR BODY ROCKKKKKKKK

@endereies

CHRIS + JUSTIN ??? THIS EATSS

@ y/n -> i’m sayingggggg

@sturniolosmind

smash !

@ y/n -> oh (i agree)

@disturbedwoodelf -> i love how no matter what chris edit i’m watching y/n is always in the comment section

@ y/n -> AND AMMM

@ mattsturniolo -> she has nothing better to do

@ y/n -> alr fuck you too then

-> and you can’t be talking you had to click at least 5 different drop down arrows to even find this reply

@ mattsturniolo -> i’m very busy actually

@ christophersturniolo -> matt you’re literally walking around the house catching pokemon

@nikolastrn -> damn they gagged you 💀

@bernardsbendystraws -> i’d rock his shit

@ y/n -> what do i even say to this

@ berbardsbendystraws -> wanna join in ??

@ y/n -> oh my 😨 (🤭)

CREDITS

@ frxy on tiktok

@ bl6tts on tiktok

@ sturniolo.vfx_ on tiktok

@ strvnloml on tiktok

@ chrislover476 on tiktok

@ edzbyang on tiktok

this took me wayyyyy too long to make, but it was so funnnn

lmk if you want more like this :)

no tag list cause i tagged y’all in the actual fic 😝

masterlist

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f1byjessie · 3 months

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IN FAIR VERONA ━━ CL16.

things are hard when you're the only female in a male-dominated space, and the newest driver for the newest team knows this best.

( charles leclerc x driver!schumacher!reader )

━━ part one.

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liked by mickschumacher, maseratimsg, and 305,029 others

yourusername feeling blue?

view all 1,593 comments

user i am gnawing at the bars of my enclosure right now

user MOTHER IS MOTHERING SO HARD RN 😩

user y/n schumacher never misses

↳ user let’s be real here user the entire schumacher family never misses

↳ user y’all have seen mick’s most recent post too right??

user she is so gorgeous i am ILL

user god really does have his favorites huh 😭😭

↳ user this is undeniable proof

↳ user people this beautiful don’t actually exist i refuse to believe it

user every day i wake up and cry that i will never be as stunning and skilled as her

user formula 2 silly season has me losing my damn mind i swear 😫 i might as well be wearing a tin foil hat with the number of theories i’m following and the consistent blue themed posts y/n keeps dropping are NOT HELPING

↳ user not to add to your conspiracy madness, but it’s already confirmed that fred vesti is replacing jehan daruvala who’s moving to mp motorsport, and there are rumors that oliver bearman is also getting a prema seat which could mean that y/n schumacher is going to another team as well or leaving f2 entirely

↳ user a good chunk of the other teams have already revealed their driver lineup and none of them include schumacher, which doesn’t leave a lot of options IF the rumours are true

↳ user i can’t see her just leaving motorsports entirely considering she’s worked so hard to get where she is 🤔 which calls into question whether she’s moving to a different racing series

↳ user i really can’t see schumacher leaving tbh, especially since she’s been in f2 since 2017 and has established herself as a prema legend basically

↳ user the fact that she has been at prema for so long (and has gotten p2 in the f2 championship nearly every year since 2017) could also be proof that she’s moving on to bigger and better things

↳ user wait she’s been there HOW LONG??? since 2017??? as in she drove with charles leclerc, her brother mick, AND oscar piastri??? 🤯🤯🤯

↳ user she’s had a very long and successful career there, but it wouldn’t surprise me if she decided to retire from formula racing and move onto some other series that’s more woman-friendly, all things considered 🤷‍♀️. she has been runner-up every year that she’s competed, proven that she has what it takes to make it in a higher level of formula racing, and yet not a single f1 team has even offered her the opportunity to be even a test or reserve driver? 🤨 something isn’t adding up and i don’t want to say it’s because she’s a girl in motorsports but it’s kind of hard to ignore the proof when it’s put right in front of you.

↳ user guys the keyword is “if” here, of course, bc as fun as it is to speculate it is all still speculation and we won’t know for certain until it’s revealed by official sources. silly season is called that for a reason, and for all we known y/n is drawing out the announcement of her continued partnership with prema to stir up interest. she’s been in a very loyal and secure partnership with them for years now, a partnership that both she and prema seem very happy to keep considering just how long it’s lasted.

↳ user f2 is another series that once you win the championship you are no longer allowed to compete in, so prema may have kept her around to help carry her male teammates into first place until females are more accepted in formula racing so that she could eventually move up to f1

↳ user prema’s gonna announce her as their driver with vesti and you all are gonna look so fucking dumb for this 🙄🙄

user blue is HER color now 😍

maseratimsg 💙

INSTAGRAM.

liked by maseratimsg, mickschumacher, and 297,130 others

yourusername to the women of f1 that came before me, who paved the way, this is for you.

view all 1,380 comments

maseratimsg When you race, they race with you 💙.

↳ yourusername 🫶💙

user Y/N SCHUMACHER??? IN FORMULA ONE??? IN 2023???

user i’ve been following her career for years now and this makes me so excited omg

↳ user me too!! she’ll be the first female to drive in f1 in over 30 years 🤭

user HARD LAUNCH BUT FOR THE 2023 GRID I GUESS

user when maserati announced they’d be getting back into formula racing i had no idea that also meant formula one as well?? they’ve got drivers in the 22-23 formula e season right now but this is how i found out about y/n schumacher driving for the 23 formula 1 season? i think i am going into shock

user 2023 might actually be a good year if this is how we’re gonna be going into it

user WOMEN IN MOTORSPORTS

user milf = man i love females-in-fast-cars

user been watching f1 since i was a kid, always wondered why there were no girls out there driving. this year i’ll get to turn on that tv and finally see someone who looks like me

↳ user it’s so fitting that maserati’s original f1 team also had the first woman f1 driver, and now they’ll be breaking barriers again by having another woman f1 driver in their first season back

↳ user i’m hoping they’ve got a good car ready cuz i wanna see y/n schumacher up on that podium telling everyone who didn’t believe she could do it just cuz she was a girl to eat shit and die 😤😤😤

user there’s a reason there aren’t any female drivers in f1. she’s doomed to fail just like all the others smh 🙄

↳ user the biggest reason is sexism, and y/n has consistently proved throughout her career that she is just as skilled if not more than her male counterparts. she works harder to make up for the physical disadvantages she has as a woman, and she still wipes the floor with the other drivers. she’s not “doomed to fail” she’s practically destined to succeed.

↳ user y/n has trained her ass off to be the best, and she’ll prove it when she gets out on the tarmac in bahrain, just you wait 🥱

↳ user she’s literally a 6-time f2 runner up??? sure, she didn’t win, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t still incredibly fucking impressive that she’s managed to get p2 against her male counterparts 6 YEARS IN A ROW 👀👀 her brother got p12 his first season and you know what she got? p2. she’s already raced with the likes of charles leclerc, zhou guanyu, yuki tsunoda, alex albon, george russell, lando norris, and a number of other very prominent formula racing names, and she held her own against them all incredibly well. she gave her own brother a real run for his money when they were teammates in 2019 and 2020, and in 2021 she was only a 9 point difference away from oscar piastri, whereas the p3 finalist was nearly a full 60 points below both of them. get out of here with that “there’s a reason there aren’t any female drivers in f1” bullshit, because the reason is misogyny 😒🙄

user not to be that person but like??? who else is lowkey excited for potential driver x driver romance?? 🫣

↳ user nah cuz i didn’t wanna make this about that but i’m actually totally ready to see who she has the best chemistry with on the grid 🫢 first hope is charles leclerc cuz they’d be a power couple hands down but also mayhaps max verstappen?? maybe??

↳ user totally agree babes a ferrari and maserati romeo and juliet love story would destroy me 😩

↳ user the parallels are already paralleling

↳ user to add to the parallels, her and charles were teammates at prema in 2017

↳ user OMG RIVALS TO STAR CROSSED LOVERS??? 😭😭

↳ user schumacher and leclerc are about to live out THE fanfic dream i can see it now

user can’t wait to see her mop the floor with these boys next year

user 2023 IS GONNA BE CRAZY 💙💙

user if i see any of those lads talk down about her or dismiss her just because she’s a woman, it’s on fucking sight 💀

↳ user they did that campaign in 2021 about equality in racing and i am BEGGING that it wasn’t just a media ploy and that they actually believe what they said about men AND women being able to drive

user this is about to be the best f1 season in history folks

INSTAGRAM.

tagged: mickschumacher, yourusername

liked by yourusername, mickschumacher, and 619,471 others

maseratimsg Prepare for trouble, and make it double ✌️💙.

view all 1,196 comments

user SCHUMACHER TWINS TEAMMATES AGAIN???

user someone pinch me i think i’m in a dream 😳

↳ user i pinched myself and this is in fact very real

user we knew y/n would be driving for maserati but to also have MICK? maserati picked not one but TWO legacy drivers they have an agenda to push and they are certainly pushing it

↳ user yeah, an agenda to win 😌

↳ user genuinely just imagine how much natural talent and skill will be in that garage come the start of the season with michael schumacher’s twins…

↳ user back in 2020 when they raced together at prema, i saw someone joke that they were made into twins because no singular human being would be able to handle having that much racing prowess, so they were split up. but idk how much of it was actually a joke because they were scarily good as teammates? y/n has always finished no more than 10 points behind p1, and mick is a very powerful driver in his own right. putting them together and letting them drive as allies again instead of rivals will be a sight that’s for sure.

↳ user imagine being nerfed at birth cuz fate knew you’d be too powerful otherwise 😂😂😂

user blue is THEIR color apparently

user it’s the schumachers’ world and we’re just living in it

↳ user schumachers vs the entire f1 grid sounds like an insane clickbait article but the fact that it’ll be real in a few months is crazy

user everyone’s talking about y/n and mick but i’m stuck on the fact that there will finally be 11 teams driving for f1 again

↳ user maserati really said fuck the expectations

↳ user maserati’s gonna get a 1-2 with the schumachers in their first year back i’m calling it now 🤪🤪

↳ user first female driver in f1 in 30 years and first 11th team to drive in f1 since 2016, and i’m betting it’ll be first ever female driver to podium in f1 and first ever female driver to win in f1 too because i’ve seen y/n schumacher’s skill and i guarantee that if she’s actually given the ability to go all out then she’s gonna be a force to be reckoned with

user hope they’ve got a good car planned cuz i wanna see these two put up a good fight

user verstappen better watch his back 👀

user Y/N SCHUMACHER WDC 2023

user at least mick got to drive with seb still on the grid, but i’m actually heartbroken that y/n won’t be able to 😔

↳ user and kimi too

↳ user i think the only drivers left are hamilton and alonso no? from before their dad retired i mean

↳ user perez, hulkenberg, and ricciardo too, but they only drove on the same grid as michael schumacher for a couple years

↳ user i imagine it would suck to lose but i personally would be very proud to see my old friend’s kids standing on a podium above me or beside me 🥹

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tagged: yourusername

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mickschumacher from beating you into this world, to beating you in karting (both professionally and casually), i'm so proud to have the chance to beat you in formula 1 too

view all 1,478 comments

yourusername those are fighting words micky 🤨

↳ mickschumacher not sure what you mean 😊

↳ yourusername it’s on sight 👊

user GUYSSS JUST THINK ABOUT THE PADDOCK INTERACTIONS BETWEEN THESE TWO

↳ user the media days boutta be crazyyyy

↳ user i’m imagining the chaos of not just having siblings on the grid together, but twins specifically, and i’m already getting a migraine on behalf of whoever their pr officers are 😅😭

↳ user 2023 is the year they make a geneva convention for the grid prank wars and it’s gonna be the because of the schumachers

user baby photos oh i am unwell 🙃

↳ user i’ve caught a nasty case of baby fever i fear

↳ user they’re both menaces as adults, i wonder how bad they were as little kids

↳ user baby fever cured methinks 😶

user 💙💙💙 MICK P1 2023 💙💙💙

user mick being proud to race with his sister but also making it well known that he isn’t gonna take it easy on her is the type of sibling rivalry content i’m looking forward to seeing this season

↳ user i need all the drivers to have this same mentality bc i know mick is gonna recognize her as the threat that she is, but if any of those lads underestimate her just bc she’s a girl, then their karma will come in the form of eating the dust of y/n schumacher’s car

↳ user PREACH 🙌🙏

charlesleclerc cannot wait to have you both on track this year

━━ tags: @maih23 @urfavnoirette @casperlikej

━━ a/n: first and foremost, happy international women's day! i've had this sitting around for a little while now and decided that today would be the perfect day to finally share it, what with the themes of women empowerment and breaking the glass ceiling. my main priority will still be my lando series until i can get that finished, but updates for this might appear in between on occasion. i also wanna take a moment just to appreciate the sheer amount of research that went into this, finding a team that would reasonably work well as an 11th team for formula 1 was a bit difficult, but i'm not gonna look a gift horse in the mouth when maserati fits pretty perfectly. also, as a twin myself, i'm incapable of writing a sibling duo that aren't also twins, and i have zero shame about that. anyways, i'm very excited for this, and i hope everyone else is as well!

#formula 1 #formula one #f1 #formula 1 imagine #f1 imagine #formula one imagine #f1 x reader #formula 1 x reader #formula one x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #social media au #smau #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc imagine #cl16 #mick schumacher

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loverboy1717 · 4 months

Text

I know most of y’all are probably excited about [redacted] but I’m fucking losing my mind over [redacted pt 2] and I don’t even have the emotional strength to consider [redacted pt 3] rn

#tmagp #tmagp vague #tmagp spoilers #also the statement was just super fucking good

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eijirousbestie · 1 year

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I love love love your bakugou x artist reader trope please we need more of it it’s so wholesome i have read it on repeat since you upload it 💗💗💗

Aahh thank you so much!! Kinda grew attached to it myself so I’m glad to hear y’all love it sm<33 This is definitely a series I plan on continuing🤟🏽 this part is kinda more goofy than anything else but I promise there’s fluff near the end<33

“Fuck around and find out”

he loses his drumsticks

missing rug

using an art supply as a weapon?

nonverbal apology

can’t admit he’s wrong for SHIT

Clay is never easy to work with and you’d be foolish to think it is. It’s messy, dries relatively quickly and dirties up every surface it graces. You swear your sculpting professor is out to get you with these ridiculous projects. From cardboard cutouts to detailed portraits to clay. It’s a madhouse in the art department.

Using your modeling tool, you try to carve into the block of raku clay that cost an arm and a leg to buy from the university’s private art supply store. It was a blessing and a curse to have it so conveniently placed right across the hall from your sculpting class. The clay and tool alone cost you $27 that you’ll never see again. This degree better be worth it. You look at your desk partner and see that she’s going to town on her clay block. She cuts, carves and scoops at it like she’s done it a thousand times over. Clay sculpting is a completely different wheelhouse you’re not used to but you’re always willing to learn. Hopefully fast.

You quickly check your phone, residual dried clay sprinkling onto the screen as you click on it. 7:50 PM. It’s time to wrap it up for the day. Almost in sync, your professor calls time and you all begin to clean up. You clean off your work station diligently and swing your bag over your shoulder, wishing everyone a good night as you leave. The walk to your car is peaceful. The night is quiet and the air is cool and clear. Truth be told, you were opposed to taking a night class at the start, probably afraid you’d get jumped at night or something irrational like that. But now it’s what you look forward to during the week. Being left alone with your own thoughts and decompressing from the day in the evening is just so therapeutic. Finally making it to your car, you get in, closing and locking the door after. Now that your hands are free from dried clay, you go through your missed messages for the evening. As soon as you turn off do not disturb your screen is flooded with missed calls and text notifications. Your eyes widen and confusion floods your mind as you scroll to the very first message.

#1 Hater🏆: yo, lost my drumsticks. you seen em?

delivered 6:15 PM

#1 Hater🏆 missed call

#1 Hater🏆: yeah you totally took em u little shit

delivered 6:30 PM

#1 Hater🏆 missed call (2)

#1 Hater🏆 missed call (4)

#1 Hater🏆: ik damn well you’re not ignoring me rn

#1 Hater🏆: i’ll go in your room rn and throw out that shitty rug. keep playin

delivered 7:05 PM

You laugh at his empty threat of a message and roll your eyes. What he had against your rug, you didn’t know. Buying a rep was cheaper than the real thing. KAWS is not a brand that’s in your tax bracket. And of course you didn’t know where his drumsticks were. He usually keeps all his music equipment locked away somewhere so it’s most likely his fault for losing them. You’re about to turn off your phone when a ping sounds from your device, a new message shining brightly on your screen.

#1 Hater🏆: forgot you were at your night class. probably got me on dnd anyways

#1 Hater🏆: still gonna give you hell for stealing my shit tho

delivered 8:03 PM

You type back a quick reply.

You: don’t have ur sticks. touch my rug and u die. I’ll be back in 5 to kick ur ass for blaming me

You shut your phone off and start your car, pulling out of the parking lot and driving back to the dorms.

Once you’re back you walk through the living room and make a beeline to your room. You open your door and what you see inside is enough to fuel nightmares. A rather deranged looking Bakugou has his hip leaned up against your windowsill, arms crossed over his chest as a single lamppost from outside your window illuminates one side of his face. He looks at you. Stares even and doesn’t say a single word.

“Is there a reason you’re just sitting in the dark like a weird-ass Disney villain or?” You flick on the light switch next to the door, drenching your room with light. It’s only then that you notice your floor is rather bare. This motherfucker.

He must have seen your reaction judging by the way his eyes follow your gaze to your now exposed wood flooring. A shit eating grin spreads across his face, damn near splitting it in two. You close your eyes and take a deep breath. You’d hate to beat his ass over something so trivial but it’s getting harder to restrain yourself. You force yourself to look him in the eyes as you speak very very carefully.

“Kats… you wouldn’t happen to know where my rug is would you?”

He straightens up and walks towards you, hands shoved deep in the pockets of his sweats, a cocky bounce in his stride.

“Dunno. My shit’s missing too. Must be a ghost or somethin’.” Not a lick of remorse escapes his mouth. He’s smug. He’s proud of himself and he even came back to the scene of the crime just to taunt you. Your left eye twitches, patience wearing thin.

“I’ll ask you one more time for the sake of being generous. Where. Is my. Rug.” He shrugs and feigns innocence.

“Fuck around and find out.”

The hell did he just say? Is he really trying to pick a fight right now? Usually you’re the one keeping the peace but this man has now dragged your innocent rug into his thick headed nonsense. You chuckle in disbelief and look at the ground, shaking your head slightly.

“‘Fuck around and find out?’ Huh… aight then.” Bag still slung over your shoulder, you unzip the smallest pocket and pull out the modeling tool you used earlier for your sculpting class. You grip it tightly in your palm, the pointed edge facing outwards. Bakugou’s cocky façade waivers a bit but he doesn’t show it. His left eyebrow quirks up in interest.

“Tryna stab me with an art supply?” You’re not really gonna stab him. Just scare him into giving you your stuff back. Maybe…

“You said fuck around and find out right? So imma fuck you up til I find out where my shit is.” You drop your bag on the ground and rush at him all at once. His once calm demeanor switches to sudden shock and he moves to dodge your swing.

“Dude what the fuck!? Will you chill?” He doesn’t know whether he’s shouting in annoyance or fear, though he’ll never admit the latter. You turn around to where he’s standing behind you, modeling tool still tightly clutched in hand.

“Give me my shit back then!”

“Cmon it’s a shitty knock off. You really gonna stab me over a $30 rug?”

“And you really stole a $30 rug over a $15 pair of drumsticks?”

“Cuz you stole em!”

“I didn’t steal anything. I don’t even know where you keep them Kats! Plus I haven’t been in the dorms since 8 this morning.” His face stills and his brain sorts through what you’d just said. It made sense really. Today was your long day this week. You’d been gone from 8 AM to 8 PM.

He straightens up from his defensive stance and looks away, rubbing the back of his nape. “Okay well even if you didn’t take em, still don’t know where they are. Everyone’s a suspect right now.”

“Then why aren’t everyone else’s things missing?”

He shakes his head and corrects you. “Nah, I took a piece of everyone’s shit too not just you. It’s all stashed til someone fesses up.” You stare at him like he’s grown two heads, face turned up in disapproval and disbelief.

“Aight Kats whatever. You know it’s not me, so can I please have my rug back?” At this point you where drained from classes and just wanted to rest. Not to mention using the last of your energy to attack this idiot.

He walks to your door and opens it, the creak of the door signaling his great escape. “Ask me nicely.” He’s closing the door behind himself now, but you’re quick to yell out.

“Dude are you seriou-”

“Under the bed.” With that, he closes the door and you’re left in silence. You kneel on the ground and look under your bed and just as he said, your rug is there safe and sound. You pull it out from its hiding spot and place it back in its respective spot on the floor. You let out a deep sigh of relief which can be heard by the eavesdropping figure just outside your door. He chuckles to himself and walks to his room. Truth be told he found his drumsticks minutes before you came back to the dorms. He was just too embarrassed to tell you he found them after misplacing them himself and blaming you for it. Plus, it was more fun this way. Minus the potential stabbing part.

#bakugou headcanons #bakugou katsuki #mha headcanons #mha drabbles #mha x reader #bakugou x reader #mha bakugou #bakugou katuski x reader #bakugou x you #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou fic

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sunasstink · 11 months

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Heyyy! I’m a new writer and this is my first fic LOL just testing the waters w my ideas.

Minors DNI, you will be blocked.

- reader and gojo are on their third date and have talked about a few things and y/n has voiced that she’s uncomfortable with sexual things in their status rn but gojo somehow fucks it up cuz that’s him.

reader is implied to be black!fem!.

fluff! slight angst!

——————————————————————————

You were sweet and kind w a beautiful heart but that don’t mean you gonna let anybody just walk all over you. Given the moment now. The restaurants dim lighting casting on gojo making him look more delicious than her already did but that didn’t stop you from catching the dumb things that flew out this boy mouth.

His hand gently rested on yours as you two waited for the bill after the amazing meal you had, you two had been seeing each other for about a month now and things had to have some tweaks but overall you like the way it’s going. he of course paid for every date and even recently paid to get your nails done, you being a woman of holding your own you insisted he didn’t but that man can’t be told no. he sent you the money and wouldn’t take it back.

right now he’s discussing him adding a few new workouts into his routine which you calmly listened, not that you understood it but hearing him talk was enough. his crystal eyes gazing at you like he was a damn prince or sum.

“yeah my hip thrusts are revolutionary if you know what I mean..”

your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, you didn’t know what he meant but you did have a hunch..slowly feeling the urge to slap him come up but hoping that’s not what he meant. his little gaze wasn’t fascinating anymore.

“umm no…I don’t know what you mean…?”

he let a small chuckle, looking to his left then back at you, knowing he’s fucked now. his hand waving as a sign to forget about it but the next worlds was it fa him.

“sexual joke, don’t worry about it pretty..”

before he could even finish the sentence you hummed and leaned back into your seat, placing your hands in your lap, the uncomfortable anger settling in you. you were simply uninterested now.

he noticed this immediately, trying to reach for your hand but failed miserably as you simply shook your head before he could even touch you.

“cmon pretty…it was just a slip up…I’m sorry”

when they came back with his card and the receipt he stood up, walking to your side of the booth, his hand out in offer to help you, simply standing up and walking past him just a bit.

“yeah I know, it’s whatever.”

it wasn’t, you opened up to him about your biggest fears, regrets and concerns. and it seemed that he took it lightly, something you didn’t appreciate.

Gojo made his way to you, his large hands slowly sliding to your waist, his tall figure pushed against your own as he stared down at you with a faced you hadn’t seen before.

he was concerned. very concerned.

“no it’s not. I know how you feel about that shit, I know I shouldn’t of said that, I’m sorry. I really care about you and I’d never just brush off something like that….now please…just…I don’t want you seeing me in that light..”

the smile you had reached from ear to ear, nobody has ever voiced how much they cared for you, or even took your thoughts into consideration. But here he was, a prideful man ignoring his ego for the woman he hopes to love so dearly. he’d do anything to make you see that you are his light.

you couldn’t be mad, gently grabbing his hand and intertwining your fingers as you both walked out of the restaurant to his car, him still apologizing here and there and for the rest of the week he had kept apologizing even after you told him it was okay.

dear, did he lose his mind over you? yes.

——————————————————————————

omg that was my first fic, hope y’all enjoy and eat it up. I wanna make more but honestly I’m scared and stalling.

#gojo x reader #gojo x black reader #gojou satoru x reader #gojo x y/n #jjk fanfic #black reader #jjk fluff #jjk angst #gojo saturo #gojo x you #gojo fluff #gojo x female reader

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veeketchum · 4 months

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I’m rewatching Voltron rn (since I was thinking back and all I could remember apart from the names of all the characters was that one monsters and mana episode) and I’m only like three episodes in but I LOVE it

one thing though-

why has no one written a isekai fic for Voltron?? I would eat that shit UP

(this is all based off the vague memories I have of the show when I first watched it, so apologies if something’s are wrong)

imagine just waking up as a newborn but you fully remeber your old life, including watching Voltron. You can practically FEEL that something is off about this world compared to the memories of your previous life, but you don’t know what until you see a sign for Garrison recruitment.

Holy shit you’re in Voltron.

You have absolutely no clue what to do, because if any isekai trope is to go by, you’re going to get dragged into the events of the show, even if you haven’t seen anyone you recognize yet.

so you prepare. Better to be safe than sorry. You research outer space, you study how to pilot, you get your hands on whatever books you can about tech and try to get familiar with how to use it, and most importantly, you learn medical procedures and how to deal with situations quickly.

the healing pods aren’t always available in the show, the castle loses power or the paladins are just too far away to get to them.

mind you, you start this all at like age 4, so your parents are probably a little concerned. But you seem content with it, and what parent would stop their child from reading?

then your parents enroll you in Garrison, without your knowledge. Not that you were mad exactly, but you were unsure if you were going to try and stay under the radar or not. Now you have no choice.

you keep your head down most of the time, praying none of the paladins show up. They don’t, at least not your first few years. It’s your third year that you spot Keith, in the freshman class.

surprise surprise, somehow your class is shifted to help train the younger class (even though you’re barely more experienced then them? You’re seriously questioning these teachers). You, against all odds, are paired with Keith. Y’all don’t talk much outside of what’s required- Keith is Keith, and you’re still trying to figure out the best way to go about this. You ask him for a few flying tips once, since you know how good he is, but he stared at you for a while before saying “aren’t you the more experienced one?” You just shrug, and neither of you speak about it again.

It rolls around to when they get that new piloting simulator, and both classes are to use it on different days. Shiro, of course, is there, just like in show. You, by memory at this point (you can’t even count how many nights you’ve sneaked into the normal simulator to practice, or the deck to spar), ace it, soaring over everyone else’s score- and by doing that, catch Shiro’s attention.

there goes staying under the radar.

——————————————

(I’m totally going to add to this, especially as I get further into my rewatch, but this is all I can think of at the moment.)

Idk, I just feel like this idea would totally be fun and new to the Voltron corner of tumblr. Again, only in the first few episodes and most of this is relying on my really old memories of the series, so sorry if it’s wrong in places.

#voltron #voltron x reader #random thoughts #writing #voltron rewatch #voltron legendary defender #keith kogane #takashi shirogane #LET MY FINGERS WRITE #give me motivation

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sunnybyler · 1 month

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HI FRIENDS i need y’all to lmk if i should read throne of glass. fun fact about me is i read acotar to get out of my reading slump — which worked — and then it immediately shot me back into one bc i couldn’t connect with other books i read the same way (also didn’t help that acotar became one of my most intense hyperfixations in a long time). so i’m trying to break my slump once again. i’m struggling my way through a book rn and i’m stubborn bc i spent money on it so i will be finishing it but for the next book i try i thought maybe i should try sjm since it worked last time.

basically all that to say do y’all think i should read throne of glass next? i had a lot of problems with the last two acotar books, but tog was finished before that so i’m hoping the recent criticisms of her writing don’t apply as much (or at least to a lesser extent). the thing holding me back is first the length of the series, but secondly i know some decent spoilers and the ending i know (fmc losing powers) is a pet peeve of mine so i’m wondering if it’s even worth it. also my favorite part of acotar was the romance and ik tog is less romance based (tho there’s still romance) but tbh i don’t rlly mind that. i might enjoy it honestly if the plot is rlly good. it seems a lot of ppl who love acotar love tog and i have some acotar moots here so i figured id try asking if i should give it a shot. basically is it as much of a page turner as acotar was? bc i think that’s what i need tbh

#lmk pls #i rlly need something new to read bc the slump is starting to get Bad #tog #throne of glass #acotar #book recommendations

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the-irrelevant-trumpeter · 5 months

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pjo ep 6 thoughts: bitchy edition because i’m still in a mood

everyone going “i wish they’d played poker face :(” annoys me so much, like they were obviously not going to play poker face. like come on stfu.

(additional note unrelated to the ep itself, but rick riordan responding to people wanting poker face with “normalise bad movie erasure” rubbed me the wrong way sooo much. like i don’t think the movies are good! and i think he’s correct by not wanting any movie callbacks! but you’re not going to do yourself any favours by criticising one of the only scenes that the book fans enjoyed? and also he says it as if he has never written anything that is worth criticising at all and everything he does is perfect. like sir, get off your high horse because the only thing i thought when you said that was “okay so you’re being a dick”. okay thank you.)

lin manuel miranda as hermes is actually very good casting. i said what i said. some of y’all need to chill out.

them knowing about the lotus casino’s effects before going inside didn’t really work for me. like i didn’t mind that same change with medusa because the way they changed that story felt a lot more fresh and interesting. but with this one, where they didn’t change the twists that much at all? idk i think there would have been more suspense if they’d let the characters (and the audience) figure that out as they spent more time in the casino.

i love love love grover so much and one of the changes i like the most is him getting a little bit more attention from the story! but when an episode is only half an hour long, i really don’t think we needed that much of it dedicated to him with that augustus guy. like i don’t care about that rn tbh. and i know the point of augustus is to show the memory loss from the casino, but i feel like that could have been done in a more interesting way (especially if, like i said, they let us figure that out as we went! like let them talk to some people from the 1800s and figure out that time works different and affects their memories.)

why name the episode “we take a zebra to vegas” if you don’t even show us the goddamn zebra? like okay then.

luke’s “old married couple” comment just felt really weird to me. like i enjoy the percabeth content we’ve been getting, but this one felt like they were just trying to spoon-feed us. let their relationship grow and develop over (hopefully) five seasons! we don’t need that at this point in the story come on now.

luke’s “how do you know” reaction to them saying they know who the lightning thief is was hilarious lmao. the boy was sweating.

i don’t think may castellan’s story needed introducing during this episode. like i didn’t mind hermes being there, and i don’t mind them alluding to later plot points a little earlier. but once again, the episode was only half an hour long, and that conversation felt like it was needlessly taking up time that could be better spent somewhere else. if you’re going to be giving us additional lore that we don’t need, then you need to either make the episodes longer or add more of them, because i feel like there was so much more we could have had in the lotus casino.

everyone’s kinda shitting themselves over percy getting four pearls instead of three, but of the plot changes, that was the one that concerned me the least? like they’re just trying to show that poseidon cares about sally, which i don’t mind. and i don’t think they’re going to just let sally escape the underworld easily, because that would be a stupid decision for the writers to make, and although there have been some things i have questioned, i don’t think they’re going to mess that up. i’m guessing they’ll lose one of the pearls when the shoes try to drag them into tartarus. dangling hope then pulling it away yknow. i don’t think the four pearls is something we should be concerned about. (if next week’s ep airs and i was wrong and they do mess it up, feel free to bring this back and laugh in my face, but i’m fairly confident.)

now you know which plot change does confuse me? making the summer solstice already have passed. like that’s a strange decision. and i understand why they’ve done it (trying to raise the stakes even more) but i feel like it was unnecessary and confusing and doesn’t add much. like i’m fine with them making changes, just as long as it brings something new to the table, but i don’t think this does, because the stakes were already high, so it just feels like changing something for the sake of it.

i wanted to say that percy not being able to drive is so relatable to me, but he’s 12 and i’m almost 18 so i feel like he’s got a lot more excuses than me.

justice for george and martha? where were they?

so many people have already said this, but the shows two biggest problems in my eyes are the pacing (why are some bits so rushed and we get no action, and then other bits so slow and clunky. like what’s going on) and also just telling us the information instead of showing us (like you’re getting the chance to use a visual medium to retell this story!!! use it!!!)

the preview for the next ep kinda spoiling the ares fight is so stupid lmaooo like can you wait for the plot twist before you go around showing us that please?

anyway i can’t tell if this episode is weaker than the others or if i just feel that way because i’m in a bad mood, so i’ll get back on that in 3-5 business days.

#literally don’t know why i’m in my hater era rn #but since i am i might as well make it everyone else’s problem #pjo spoilers

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goldenhypen · 2 years

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hey y’all ,,, so i wanted to make an update post to get this off my chest and i wanna be completely transparent with you guys ,, BTW don’t get scared or anything sjsjsjs it’s nothing huge or serious but i do wanna let you guys know this in case there’s smth to prepare for in the future ig ,, sjsjsjs

so it’s been pretty obvious that i haven’t written in a wHILE SJJSJ ,, ik for some it may not seem very long, as it hasn’t even been a month since i’ve released new work, but for me, as a writer who tried to get at least one work out a week, this doesn’t feel v good sjsjsjsjs and throughout this season of not posting any new content, i’ve noticed i’ve lost a lot of followers, at times, losing more than gaining, which ik i shouldn’t let matter v much, but inevitably, unfortunately it does play a part in the way i feel about my blog. and during this time, i’ve gone through lots of thoughts about my writing and my future with writing ,, and i’m just going to be completely transparent with you guys and honest, but basically this included/includes losing confidence in my writing, and even questioning whether i want to keep writing or not. there’s some personal reasons behind this which i’d rather not disclose, at least not for now, but who knows ,, maybe this is just a phase of writer’s block and burn out.

also, it’s almost jake’s birthday and being the jake simp i am, i’m going to post a piece on his birthday, but the fact that his day is coming up also actually made me question whether i wanna post smth for him or not,, sjsjsj but i have come to the decision that i will be posting a work on his birthday, and if i’m being honest, jake is my muse for a lot of my ideas sjsjsj (woah what a surprise 😱) yet despite this, it’s still been difficult to produce this piece bc of the current state my mind is still in about my writing. i might even end up scrapping what i have rn and write smth much shorter, but we’ll see how i end up doing shsjsj

but yeah, some thoughts i have to maybe fix whatever you wanna call this ,,, writer’s block, whatever,, if i do want to write more, is to maybe open requests again so i have a motivator to push me to get work out and so that i’m not just running on my own ideas, which can be challenging sometimes. and a thought i had on this, which is still very up in the air for whether i wanna actually implement this is that i think it would be kinda fun to open requests on a regular basis, such as like every weekend for just a few hours,, smth like that,,, another possibility if i don’t end up opening requests, i was thinking of possibly just continuing taking a break from writing like i am rn and just come out with new works occasionally, whenever i get inspiration for new fics.

in all of this being said, i do want to also announce that i will be putting my series the bachelorette on hold as of now. sorry to make you all wait. your anticipation makes me rlly excited for the series, but i can’t bring myself to write it rn, i’m sorry :(

so to summarize, this is NOT a quitting writing announcement post sjsjsjsn i’m not going anywhere, as of now, but in terms of me writing, i do feel uncertain of what i want to do for the future bc of several reasons, but right now, i feel like i need a little bit more of a break <//3 but i will get a jake fic up on his birthday in a few days.

i hope this all makes sense, and i appreciate all of you who read up til the end of this post and for understanding. if you have any questions or words of encouragement or anything like that, i’m still here and am not planning to go anywhere for a while :) i love you guys, thanks for reading <3

#this post is so emo dsjkdksj i'm so sorry #feel free to interact with this post to lmk you've read it :) thanks for doing so and for understanding guys <3 #also this was A LOT SDKJKSDJK #which means #i feel like i’m forgetting smth :D #but this is long enough as is so i’ll just leave it as this sjsnsjjs #thanks for reading <3 #em speaks

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scoups4lyfe · 1 year

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Bipolar Essay Extra #4

A solid a$$ explanation of BD from Ian:

So, to add in some of my own experience here, I'll put in some of my journal entries, and then go a little in-depth:

[Friday, June 3rd 2022]

(20:54 — 8:54 PM)

Oh, great. The insanity is back.

Now, this type of insanity is hard to describe. Just…wired energy. Like anxious energy spazzing through me like I just took 9 shots of caffeine.”

(End of entry.)

My thoughts:

Okay--so I still vividly remember the energy. Ian said there's so much energy, so much ideas, and that it gets to a point where you start losing sanity, and that's the point I was at. I just had all this energy inside of me, my mind was going 200 miles a minute but with 3 different voices, my hands were trembling, and I couldn't do anything because the energy was too my mortal coil to handle 🤪.

...

[September 15th 2022 — Thursday, 2:24 AM. ]

Currently fvcking tripping right now. I don’t think my mood stabilizers are doing the thing that they should be doing. Like I am out of my mind right now. I feel inSANE. Not bad-insane yet, but I know I’m going to have trouble sleeping. I….want to write and draw and watch Donbrothers but all this energy doesn’t want to do any of this. Like for some reason I want to go out running and screaming maybe, like I could jog five miles— but? This energy does not want to write or draw or watch sh*t or liveblog. It’s frustrating, but I can’t even be frustrated? Because my mood is just elevated lol. I feel fvcking crazy right now.

The Moodswings movie (part 1) for this album [DPR Ian’s] is…something I greatly relate to. I see myself in that video. That’s me. Dude, it’s like looking through a mirror. Damn, it just reminded me of how shaky I was like a month ago when my thoughts wouldn’t stop racing and I felt like I was spiraling out of control at work. Dude that sh*t was hard. Right now I feel good, but I know this high isn’t….normal lol. These last few days have been somewhat like this, but this is the most energized and elated I feel. To the point that I can’t even get upset. Like, yoINks.

[End of entry]

Bro I hit that euphoric mania and got lost in the sauce And --warning ahead, the next entry I'm putting under this one was when I was deep into that euphoric mania. You can tell too cause my thoughts are all over the place.

[October 3rd, 2022]

Monday, 5:35 PM

Too Much, Too Much, All at Once, ah FvCK

Everything is glowing. Like all the light sources are especially bright and so it’s hard to focus on any one thing because all this light is shining at me and my eyes are going in and out of focus. Right now I can’t stare at the computer screen. I can’t focus on it, it’s like my eyes start seeing everything in this room at once, and it’s all so bright, and I can’t think when it’s like this. Tomorrow is trash pick up day, so I finally got the garbage out of my room and …now there is a lot more space— fvck. I feel like I’m trembling but it’s not my body—maybe just my eyes.

Man trying to gesture draw like this is going to be real sh*tty I can already tell.

Uh, I hope this entry is coherent, I don’t feel very coherent right now. Just zazzed.

I got a tab up, “Guide to Mental Health Acronyms,” because I want to finally know and remember what the fvckin acronym for “bipolar disorder” is. BitJazz borderline personality making everything all complicated. (Damn, mfer I am TRIPPING.)

[6:12 PM] WhOOPS—sorry, y’all. Got distracted texting J (and then this other acquaintance). Though all I’m inclined to text rn is just nonsense gibberish, occasionally in a nonsense rhyme scheme, and featuring a few thrown in completely-made-up words that just feel right. Man, on tumblr today — I was on the manic depression tag — I saw a post talking about grandeur delusions, but their delusions were “the belief that I could finally change for the better, start eating healthy everyday, working out everyday, cooking and cleaning everyday” and I was like—

Damn, holmes! I guess I was more fvcked outta my mind then I thought. (I remember, idk how many weekends ago, having that same exact thought process and feeling because DAMN was I capable in that moment—ah. )

[6:28 PM]

Sorry—was texting an acquaintance again. Wanted to share the above meme, and so I sent it once, and then a few texts later I sent it again. (Because it makes me laugh, LOL!!!!) Anyways, when I read tha— I need to get myself some more multivitamins lest I evaporate and die.

FVCK

[6:40 PM]

Damn I wish I could read. Right, right—that tab with the Mental Health Acronyms thing. Riiiiight. The Mental Health Acronyms tab ,,, the tab involving mental Health Acro—

(lol)

[8:28 PM]

I’ve done some gesture drawing. Decided to move the 30 second timer (since I’ve done 70 drawings with it) to 2 minutes. My mind is fireworks. AAhhHHHHLHH;hhHH. Just read a tumblr post that said, “Being manic is feeling stuck in a perpetual loop of vertigo” and yah. I’ll drink to that bro. (LOL).

I just found the perfect description. (Found, in my own thoughts, that is.) Right now, what I’m experiencing is like if I put on those red+blue 3-D glasses at the movie theater, except it's not red or blue, just light and so now I’m tripping tf outta my mind.

(Unrelated) But a solid description of how I’ve been with my money these last like 5 months, literally the equivalent of: “Wow! I spent $50 on buttons in a variety of colors because I saw them and thought, ‘aw those are such cute little fkin buttons! I can place them all over my house and every time I see one I’ll be filled with immense joy because they’re just so fkin cuteeeeeeeeeee.’ And then when the buttons arrive being like, “What the fvck???/ What tHE FVCK?????” But then buying $50 more like 2 weeks later.

Absolutely, 3 billion percent embarrassing behavior.

[End of entry excerpt ....it goes on for much longer LOL]

Anyways, I think these do a good job of showing what the mind of someone going through a manic episode is like--constantly switching thoughts, getting distracted, not all coherent, yada yada yada.

PPT Essay: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5], [6]

PPT Essay Extras: (1), (2), (3), (4)

Visuals of a Depressive Episode: (1), (2)

Journal Entries: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

[Prev]. [Next]

#my thougts #bipolaire #bipolar disorder #manic depression #actually bipolar #mental health #neurodiversity #neurodivergencies #dpr ian #dpr we gang gang #christian yu #fvcking moodswings ⚡️✌️#a scoup of life 🔫🦆

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harley-style · 2 years

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Reading the Homestuck Epilogues 2 (parts 11-20)

Ayo this time its parts 11-20 lets go!!

⬇️Click here to read part 1 ⬇️

Dave needs john to be way more specific than “you and karkat look cute together”, what a dumbass.

“You make cute friends” nevermind we have TWO (2) dumbasses.

Okay i will admit my bias for davekat is obvious here im sorry ill stop

Well if it makes you feel better dave im also very fucking in a mess about my own identity so

“Because jade” is such an apt fucking description.

JOHN YOU DO NOT FLIP A FUCKING COIN TO CHOOSE WHO YOU DATE W H A T

So this is off to a great start.

I cant even comment on part 12.

Oh no, what?

OH. OH NO. MOTHERFUCKER DONT DO IT.

THE HOE FUCKING DID IT. FUCK.

I’m sorry, they let Dave carry W h a t.

This is unsettling. Props to Dave and Roxy for heartfelt eulogies, but FUCK whatever gamzee’s up to.

Okay i caNNOT read his quirk, im sorry.

JOHN IM GONNA FUCKING STRANGLE YOU

Okay but as someone who 100% knows why dirk did what he did I fully endorse and support John slapping some pointy-shade-bastard’s ass into the fucking concrete. Dgmw i love dirk but. He has made several decisions that i happen to find “not-poggers”.

Oh, fuck. He lost them.

Getting hitched seems a bit too forward but ok

Catch the boquet or else is a red flag, folks.

John you’re right on the nose. I want jade to be happy with dave and kat but the way she’s doing it is. Forceful?

Oh. John and roxy did the. Oh.

Yeah uhm. I also. Really dont adore how davejadekat is going rn.

TEREZI IS THE LITERAL FUCKING BEST SHE’S SO SMART

John is losing it and honestly i dont blame him i would too

Jane. Baby. Sweetheart. N O.

Jane you are literally being so fucking xenophobic right now.

Jesus fucking christ gamzee. And jane. What the fuck.

I really do feel bad for jake. He’s like the butt of the meta joke all the time.

Okay but it concerns me that these kids arent even 30 and theyre thinking about kids? GUYS. YOU’RE YOUNG. CHILL OUT WITH THE CHILD REARING, GOOD LORD ABOVE.

Okay there is a corpse. Oh my god.

Also guys i know im davekat biased but it really is clear to me that out if everyone here they have the healthiest dynamic in that their only flaw is being in denial about there being a relationship. Like. Somethinf that can be fixed if theyre left alone by literally eveyrone else and their issues.

Oh we’re getting political

Yknow, part of why i like reading rn is because its escapism from really heavy issues? Yeah i uhm. Am struggling with part 20. But i love karkat and he is always right so.

Oh is this why davekat fell apart in candy

Why, Jane, don’t you know like calls to like? If you find yourself surrounded by clowns, that’s your own goddamn fault.

And that’s another reading sesh done folks! I’ll be honest I’m losing my goddamn mind. I’m genuinely worried about the fictional politics between these dumbasses and how theyre tearing this family apart. Where the fuck is Mr. Crocker and why is he not policing these kids??? Theyre CLEARLY in over their heads? God….

Okay i know i call them kids when theyre like three years older than i am but still.

Anyway thank you guys for joining me again i hope you had a laugh watching me rage over the homestuck caste being fucking idiots. I’ll see y’all next time in part 3! (Lmk if i should put any tags for y’all to be warned about i am a simple dumbass and cant catch everything)

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beta-adjacent · 6 months

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AGGHHH YIPPEE :strained smile emoji: I GUESS YALL ARE GETTKNG MORE FEELS TODAY: autism edition (not me having autism, I don’t think, unless this is related to that somehow. Idk my Brian is genuinely so scatterbrained rn I don’t know what to do with myself. Like all my organs are unraveling bc I kept them too compact last week. Sorry, worse stuff under the cut :’)))))))) sorry again)

Bro, my empathy is so fucking bad because I feel too much of people’s emotions and then I just. Assume something I read is something everyone experiences.

Like, number one, got called ~The Spectrum Whisperer~ during the holidays this year ayyyyyyyyyyy let’s go (they all marvel at me, like understanding autism is somehow to be marveled?????????? Skill issue, that’s what they all have.)

Number two, I sometimes feel like a really really bad whisperer (I shouldn’t actually call myself a “whisperer” because again, this shit isn’t hard, people are just assholes or just aren’t taking the time to learn. Fucking skill issues y’all!!!) because I Know I can’t assume or generalize things, but I still do.

Like, ohohoho my god, my anxiety around the thought of autistic people getting their schedule thrown off because of me?????!?!? I want to break down crying and eject my organs out of my body bro. Because I know that feeling!!!! Losing control because you don’t know what’ll happen in your day is fucking angering and confusing and makes you feel terrible!!!!!!! And that’s coming from someone who (probably) doesn’t even have autism.

So good golly, it makes me sick to my stomach to think I’ve ruined someone’s schedule. But I am a human and schedules often go wrong and I feel so guilty everytime it does. I can’t ever tell if it’s better to just suffer through and let the schedule run its course (save their schedule) or if I should just say I can’t do it (and save my schedule).

What’s worse is that I think the majority of the autistics I’m surrounded by rn don’t actually mind schedule changes that much!! It’s a fucking me emotion and assumption I’m imposing onto them, like a total asshole!!!!!!!! It makes me want to break out in hives or pull my bones out of my body, like that level of anguish y’know???!?!?!?

So then of course now I’m the self-fulfilling asshole prophecy who’s ruining my own schedule and torturing everyone else by trying to make everyone fit in my schedule. Which of course I’m aware of and that contributes to just another feeling of self-loathing and doubt.

And what sucks about that is the autistic people in my life rn really prioritize honesty. It’s been so hard to remember to be honest. I kind of forgot why I lie in conversation or about anything at all. No one likes dishonesty. Except those rare times when they do. But I can’t always tell that so I just play it safe by lying about random things all the time. Am I lying to you all right now by explaining this story? I might not be, but now I’ve planted the idea in your head!

anyway uhhh. Right, there’s a rarely seen desire in the people I care about in my life to be truthful about everything. “Ew gross,” I think to them, “even lies of omission?” They reply in my head “especially that!!” I groan, and turn away from them, but then I get scared they disappeared, as if I’m some child and they’re playing peekaboo just to fuck with me. So I whip my head back and they’re still fucking there. Tormenting me, I tell you!! But of course they aren’t actually, it’s just my fear again. Silly fear.

….wow I totally lost track of everything I was talking about. But I’d love to talk to my Good Honest Friends about this stuff, but after all of this, do you really think I’d allow myself to tell them? My Good/Bad Dishonest Friends definitely wouldn’t get it. My Bad Honest Friends actually might…. But they might hurt my feelings if I tell them. Lord forbid they do as I fear and actually say I have a skill issue!

No I’m kidding. None of this is real. I made it all up. I’m perfect and have no such feelings or flaws or worrries. And if I did I’d certainly feel like I could tell absolutely anyone about them other than my therapist who I’ve even started to suspect hates me for my withdrawn nature.

Ok I read through everything I wrote. This is a good skill I learned a long time ago. If I don’t know what I’m saying, I pause and then I think back and then I try to reformulate my thoughts before the anxiety of taking too long to think eats me. So I’m trying to say that my empathy levels of really kind but really really stupid, because I’m imposing my own issue onto others, and instead of just owning up to my issue and working with people on a mutually agreed upon midpoint, I try to cut corners by meeting them exactly where they’re at, which isn’t often where I’m at, and praying I didn’t stretch myself too thin, except they can always tell when I have because I’m so fucking easy to read that it’s embarrassing.

I don’t know what I’d do with myself if they hate me for what I do or think or say. Probably unsavory things. I wish I didn’t care so much. Maybe this isn’t empathy. It’s just some ugly curse I’ve been born with. But I love them so much. But I hate myself so much. I’m so tired.

TLDR uhhh. Purposefully bulldoze over people’s schedules, especially mine.

#vent #rant #idk what this is #a bitch is scatterbrained rn

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unkn0wnusererr0r · 1 year

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Daddy told me he still wants to collar me tonight, well I asked. He said yes, probably… Once shit gets worked out. I’m terrified it wouldn’t work out and then I lose… everything. I lose not just my family but my doms too. The first dom I ever had who I wanted to be forever. The first male dom I’ve ever had and don’t want to lose. You confuse the fuck out of me and then get mean when I say I’m confused. But it’s not my brain misconstruing things, it’s all based off language and other observations. I know and understand that we need to get healthy and we need to grow our friendship, and that we need to work through our issues… but it’s you who agreed that is a tangible thought to think we can healthily be together. It’s not just me starting conversations. It’s you who said if our date had happened and went well you’d be my girlfriend. You tell me you aren’t leading me on and that you want us to fix things (outcome aside) and then turn around and tell me that maybe it’s that you don’t want to and maybe it’s that you are being so chill that I don’t kill myself - but that you have hope, you wish things will work out, you are relying a fate some here too, it’s you that’s not changing any statuses (not that I want change anything or am going to rn) it’s you who said we aren’t to the true split of things, that we are seeing… it’s confusing. I don’t think it’s a bad thing that we have different personalities, I like how blunt you are, even when it hurts. I’d rather hear the truth that be lied to. Lying hurts more. We also, just as much have personality traits that are similar or the same too. I don’t want it to be because you aren’t ready to let me go… I just wanna finish this movie, I don’t want it to be one that never gets unpaused. My heart clicked when I had y’all, it felt right and complete and then y’all went and took a mallet to it. I want to show myself and everyone else I know how to be a non-vacant parent to the next baby while continuing to show honeybean too. I don’t want y’all to move away without me, I don’t want to get a separate apartment to be close to my kid.. and my family. I want us all to be living under the same roof again in the future. I would do ANYTHING to be (one of) your safe spaces again. To be able to read your thoughts before they come out of your mouth. I want to be given the goddamn chance to Woo you, like you said I needed to. Those were your words… please let me prove that. Please don’t leave for good. Please. I am making the changes I need to make for myself to be a person I like and a person who my family likes; because I don’t care what people say. One of my personal priorities is to be mentally well enough for my family. It’s not you I’m holding on to, it’s faith and hope that my family wants me to return to them, that we get unpaused and at least a shot of trying again. I’d give anything in this world, but my honeybean to have one more shot at happiness with you… because you were my happiness, my family is my favorite thing on this earth. Y’all are always on my mind. I’m not trying to push you away, I’m to calm down or not have my freak outs around y’all. Please… I’m trying.. just please. You don’t say you miss me anymore, you don’t want to kiss me anymore. Even after texting me saying it’s been days since we kissed… I’m not one of your faves anymore… and I’m so so angry at myself for (my part of) fucking shit up - nobody really ever wants to fuck things up, it’s not typically the goal. I know that but I’m still so so mad at myself. I hate my brain and I wish I could just cut it out of my skull. I don’t wanna have a fucked up brain that makes managing relationships so damn hard, I am so mad at myself that part of (probably) losing my family is that my brain is literally so fucked that I don’t get to be a part of my family (not oh best friend) anymore because it, it being my brain, ruined things. Just “take a (one more) chance on me”, “pick me, choose me, love me”, “be mine” and every other stupid cliche. Please.

#vent

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