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verycharismaticdragon · 9 months

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@mandlien: Op where is the essay 👀 @latitudeoctopus: An essay I would like to see 🙏

Glad u asked! <-guy who was totally angling for someone to ask

OG post this continues from, for those just tuning in now:

actually SQQ's first encounter with LQG perfectly illustrates which of SY's idiosyncrasies perfectly converged to make him absolutely obsessed with Binghe, in this essay i will

So, to start with, the explanation for why I think this scene in particular is more illuminating than all of SQQ's interactions with actual LBH.

That's because there's not a single scene in the novel where his interactions with LBH-the-person are not colored by pre-existing bias of already being obsessed with LBH-the-character. Like, consider the scene where he appraises Shen Qingqiu's looks, and finishes it off with:

He still couldn’t compare to Luo Binghe. (vol.1, ch.1)

despite not having seen Luo Binghe in person yet. But no, he's already convinced his beloved blorbo is of course The Handsomest Ever!

Simply speaking, we never encounter Shen Yuan pre-Binghe Syndrome (when instead of brain there's binghe). So it's difficult to tell whether any particular way he thinks or feels in Binghe’s presence is the standard for him, or owed to the fact that he already likes Binghe in at least one way.

But the same can not be said of Liu Qingge: while SY did have some interest in his character, he didn’t really think of him before encountering him in Lingxi Caves. Plus, unlike Binghe who seems to have fully aligned with SQQ’s expectations of him, LQG had given him a little shock — which prompted some re-evaluation of his prev thoughts on SQQ's part.

(cont. under cut)

Now is a good time to mention that I arrived at thinking about this scene while considering Shen Yuan's relationship with toxic masculinity — and remembering I jotted down 'Shen Yuan's fascination with masculinity' in my reread notes for this scene.

[Bai Zhan Peak] was the most warlike of Cang Qiong Mountain's branches, as well as the branch with the greatest martial ability. Every single generation's Bai Zhan Peak Lord was a world-class swordmaster, a victor of countless battles, an undefeated legend. How hot-blooded—how dashing! Male readers always fervently admired strong characters. Even though Liu Qingge never officially debuted on page, he hadn't lacked for fans, and Shen Yuan had been especially fascinated with him. In his headcanon, Liu Qingge had been a sharp and manly man, powerful and magnificent. A war god, right?! (vol.1, ch.2)

So, Shen Yuan’s fascination with Liu Qingge’s character — or rather his headcanon version of it — is about Liu Qingge being someone who (in SY’s mind) embodies masculine qualities. And what qualities are those? From this section, being “strong” (has to be physically powerful) and “undefeated” (can’t be a loser) — yeah, pretty standard toxic masc starting kit.

And something of interest here: though SQQ describes it mostly as his own feelings, even in this excerpt, he slips in a “male readers always [...] admired” — which, when considering everything else we know about his relationship to masculinity, kind of gives off an insecurity vibe. He seems to be either trying to justify his own feelings (i.e., ‘other men feel the same way, i’m in-group not out-group, i’m not failing at being a man by feeling this way [admiring another man]’), or else emulating other male fans and trying to convince himself he relates to the story the same way they do (i.e., ‘male readers admire strong characters and im a man therefore i definitely also admire the same things’).

Speaking of emulating other male fans, there’s another quality that SY seems to associate with masculinity, this one not very related to Liu Qingge — though SQQ does make a mental detour into it in the same scene, when talking about other Peaks.

Yeah, when he mentions Xian Shu, and the fact that the popularity of self-insert erotic/lewd fics about Xian Shu "compared to that of the original work” in PIDW fandom, or possibly even in general on ‘Zhongdian’ (since afaik you can publish fanfiction on Chinese webnovel sites alongside original works, you just have to tag it as such). In other words, among male fans.

But we know SY doesn’t like sex scenes, right? Hell, his favorite wife is Liu Mingyan at least in part because she doesn’t have sex scenes:

There was one more appeal factor. Liu Mingyan was the only female character for whom Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky didn't write detailed sex scenes. (vol.1, ch.2)

Of course… that’s what SQQ says in his head where nobody can hear him. We actually have evidence of him singing a different tune when among other fans:

Most of the female protagonists are stupid sexy lamps, and the male lead doesn't even bed Liu Mingyan, the only breath of fresh air? He doesn't bed the rightful empress? Are you fucking kidding me? (vol.4, ch.26, part 1)

(speaking of, this is why ‘peerless cucumber is SY’s true self’ takes baffle me. his toxicmascsona is his true self, really?)

So SY has another qualifier for ‘manly man’ in his head: being sexual (of course, in a straight way). Which is not something that comes naturally to him, as evidenced by him cringing away from any actual action even when he tries to emulate the thought pattern, e.g.:

Qi Qingqi? She was indeed slightly junior to him, and their first meeting...he'd long forgotten how it went. "Often together" wasn't quite right, though. Perhaps he at times dared to think about going to Xian Shu Peak so they could be "often together," but while he had the wicked intentions, he lacked the courage required to follow through—and he could never commit an act as depraved as stalking. (vol.4, ch.23)

Riiiight, SQQ, you totally have those 'wicked intentions' that you merely can't follow through on because you just invented reasons not to.

But that does give us an image of SY’s ideal of masculinity. Extremely powerful, undefeatable, and hypersexual… yeah no points for guessing who. I’m pretty sure SQQ even directly equates Bing-ge with masculinity somewhere, I just can’t remember the exact spot. And he also believes that any man should definitely want to be in Bing-ge’s place, like for example here:

Every man dreamed of being caught between an angel and a devil. To watch them jealously vie with each other over him one moment, then risk life and limb for his sake in the next—that was the highest, most sacred, perverted fantasy of every male organism. (vol.1, ch.2)

…though I must note, once again, “every man”, “every male organism” — but does SQQ actually feel the same way? I think that the answer is he thinks that he should, and is trying to convince himself that he does.

Which must be difficult considering he finds men more attractive than women, returning back to that scene with Liu Qingge.

In any other state, Shen Qingqiu might have declared, "What a beautiful man!" (vol.1, ch.2)

Really bestie? You would've declared it? Because I don't see you show the same enthusiasm about women. In fact, you usually jump right into how they were described in the novel, as if you don't have your own opinion.

Now, I must note that I personally don’t think finding someone attractive equals actually being attracted to them. But this does imply which way SQQ's tastes veer. In fact, we can even see that he has a type. First, he describes LQG's face as "as beautiful as a fine woman's"; then adds:

This was clearly the face of a charming young master who arranged flowers and plucked farewell willow branches! (vol.1, ch.2)

Of course, if we are talking about charming young masters with feminine looks, their bearing that of a classic Chinese gentleman (warrior-scholar ideal who’d ‘pluck farewell willow branches’)...

That firm yet humble countenance, demonstrating his noble and unyielding spirit. That pencil-straight back and stance, evincing a proud core that would rather break than bend! (vol.1, ch.1)

[SQQ] saw a glimpse of the future Luo Binghe's unique grace, that of "eyes like cold stars, a soft and radiant smile, with muted words and quiet laughter." (vol.1, ch.1)

In truth, deep down, Bing-ge's fair and clean pretty-boy type didn't really suit the tastes of "Great Master" Airplane Flying Towards the Sky. He had only assigned this sort of configuration to the protagonist to meet his stallion hardware specifications. The art of growing stallions was grounded in science, and the research was clear: women preferred men who looked cultured, pretty, and even a bit soft and feminine. (vol.4, ch.26, part 2)

…there’s no question who is superlative in SQQ’s heart. To boot, he doesn’t even realize that he’s biased about LBH’s attractiveness, as we can see from Airplane-bro’s musings above. So that’s Cucumber-bro’s type: cultured, pretty, a bit feminine.

See, a fun little discrepancy here: what SQQ sees as a masculine ideal and therefore can admire plainly — again, powerful, undefeatable, and hypersexual, — and what he finds attractive in a man, under all those layers of denial, are two pretty different things.

Liu Qingge, despite his appearance unveiling a side of both to us, doesn’t actually fully embody either type: on the masculinity side, he is missing the hypersexuality, on the attractiveness side, his looks fit but his bearing doesn’t match.

But you know who hits all of SY’s qualifications on both counts?.. yeah, once again no points for guessing, it stars with "Bing" and ends with "ge".

So: the source of Shen Yuan’s obsession with LBH-the-character is the intersection of those two factors. Like you know that old wlw joke “I can’t tell if I wanna be her or date her”? Thats Shen Yuan with Luo Binghe, but, yknow, unconsciously. He admires LBH as an epitome of masculinity, an image of a Perfect Male to strive for; he also very much finds him attractive in a gay way.

In fact, I would even say that an important component of Binghe brainrot is that he is an acceptable target for admiration. How can SY be accused of being gay over liking a horny stallion novel? So it’s totally normal that he thinks of Binghe a lot, obviously that’s just because he looks up to him! Because Binghe is such a perfect iteration of a male stallion protagonist! Who wouldn’t want to be in his place, thinks Shen Yuan, never ever having imagined being in Binghe’s place even once. Ofc that’s only because Binghe got insane game though! Shen Yuan couldn’t hope to compare. LBH is just so admirable and sexy,, for the wives of course, the wives find him sexy, not Shen Yuan, Shen Yuan is just stating facts— etcetcetc.

Point is, LBH is a man that Shen Yuan can like without shame, because he has a whole bag of above-the-board reasons to prove that he's not liking him the wrong way. A perfect target of convergence for Shen Yuan’s conscious and unconscious thoughts (and desires).

And this is how SY ended up with the years-long hyperfix we see in the beginning of the novel.

#shen qingqiu #shen yuan #bingqiu #svsss #svsss meta #scum villain's self saving system #scum villain's self-saving system #mxtx #danmei novels

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fractualized · 7 months

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Time for a surprise The Man Who Stopped Laughing post! Here I was all mad that Jason disappeared in TMWSL #11, and then Rosenberg basically decided Gotham War: Red Hood #2 is a TMWSL side story with a lot I was not expecting!

I still hate that there's no effort at a legible timeline but all the surprises in this issue are helping me move past it. (OK I can't lie I'm always going to hate it at least lowkey.)

More thoughts:

So basically the Gotham War stuff is all happening before/during TMWSL #11 meaning the two Jokers were just hanging around Gotham for the two months Bruce was asleep I KNOW I SAID I'D STOP I'LL STOP. Jason strayed into Gotham War at first partly because of his search for Joker, asking the men Selina has recruited for clues about his location, but then he got more involved, enough that GW Red Hood #2 starts with Joker trying to find out where Jason is.

What an interesting turn!

The note does get to Jason, via a dead body (laid to rest by Scarecrow, not Joker).

Ohhh this is a twist. Last month in TMWSL, Ravager gave Manhunter a list of locations from Jason, places to look for Joker, and now we know they were provided by Joker himself?! Because he wants to make sure Jason finds him? And is probably plain insulted that someone who was pursuing him so single-mindedly suddenly stopped? hahaha

Jason says he'll meet up with Ravager in a couple days, but he misses his appointment because, as you may know, Zur-influenced Bruce decides to Clockwork Orange him so he'll feel debilitating fear whenever his adrenaline ratchets up. But Ravager isn't the only one who notices Jason's absence.

Joker did say back in the hospital in TMWSL that he might have plans for Jason, but I took that more as a taunt. I didn't know he actually was depending on Jason being around. (Though given the time jump, that could be a recently created plan.) Also, "Batman can't have him! I TOOK CUSTODY IN THE DIVORCE."

And look at Joker all ready to go with his hat! And the umbrella. The umbrella detail kills me.

It's also just really funny to me that like, sometimes Catwoman in Gotham War acts parental toward Jason. Here, Joker is intent on finding him. In the following pages, Harvey hears what happened to Jason and says Jason is "more one of us than he knows. And he's had a rough life because of that." And then Scarecrow comes upon Jason during a Missing Scene that takes place during Catwoman #58 when Jason tries to save a little girl from a fire...

Just when I'm laughing that Jason is everybody's blorbo, this happens.

MOMMY. Batman is Jason's Daddy, and Joker is Jason's Mommy. Oh my god. Rosenberg, you magnificent glowing sunrise.

Joker chases Scarecrow away like a disobedient cat with his squirtgun, and then turns back to Jason.

I think Grundy's pee could probably still ward Scarecrow off. Also is Joker mad Jason didn't tell his parents they have a granddaughter? :(

Joker again insisting Jason is important for his plans. Joker saying he's going to fix Jason, his "sweet boy." Is Joker of all people going to undo what Bruce did? That would be pretty hilarious, something to hang over Bruce's head later.

But whatever it is, it's not going to happen now, of course. Joker leaves Jason under the beam so the scene can play out as it does in Catwoman #58, in which Jason did not mention Scarecrow or Joker. I'm not sure if that's just because he still wants to take care of his own business or that he's not sure they were real.

I'm assuming all this means Jason will in fact appear in the TMWSL finale, though suddenly afraid of everything, which will be kind of weird for people only reading that story. Then again, maybe Bruce will end up fixing Jason himself in the last GW issue on Halloween, with how weird and inconsistent the GW writing has been.

Regardless, this particular issue was an unexpected delight, and it's boosted my assumption that the end of TMWSL #11 is a fakeout and this Joker is very much the real one. Too much would hit different in a bad way if he wasn't…

#the man who stopped laughing #gotham war #batjokes #joker #jason todd #my jibber-jabber #spoilers

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queenofthearchipelago · 1 month

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There's a lot of discussion right now about how to search for fics that are "worth reading". Which mostly seems to be divided between fandom people who have been here for more than 4 years, and know to search by tags and whether or not you like the summary or not, versus new people who only consider fics with a high kudos number to be "worth it" or "good enough".

I try to keep negativity off my blog, so I don't mention this to discourage the writers who follow me. Let me try to encourage you instead.

From the notes on these posts, I'm seeing a large majority of people find fics by summaries and tags, as intended. Please, if you are someone who is a new writer, or an older writer with less readers on your works than you hoped for, please know that the majority of readers are still looking for fics by tags and summary.

In the fandom I'm most active in right now, the Good Omens fandom, I look up the new fics every few days, and on Every Single One of them, I see that HUNDREDS of people have already hit on them. Hundreds. After just one day.

Now yes, Good Omens is a big fandom. So those numbers don't easily translate to smaller fandoms, or older fandoms. But I think this is still wonderful news, magnificent evidence that people ARE still reading what is new. People are chosing what they read by ACTUALLY READING the summaries and the tags and sometimes, they just open the fic and start reading completely blind to what the story is about!

And if you're someone reading this post who decides what they read based on hit count, I want to share a small story.

"Slow Show" is one of the Good Omens fandom's most famous works. I read it several months ago now and I read it purely because I was told it was amazing and it seemed everyone around me agreed.

I read it, and I didn't actually like it that much. I can say such brilliant things about that work. The prose, the language, was used in such a way that I'm jealous I can't write like that. I LOVED the set up. I loved the character development. I have such vivid and wonderful memories of the ending.

But it just didn't scratch any itch I had. And that's OKAY. It was still WORTH IT.

Sometimes the best fic you're ever gonna read is only gonna have 50 hits. And sometimes the fandom's favorite fic is just not gonna be for you.

Fandom is for US. Every reader is not the target audience of every fic. Writers write for themselves and they hope to find people with similar interests. We're here to make friends through stories. To put our blorbos into Situations.

If you're someone who is sorting by hits, and only hits, I recommend just searching a fandom and then hitting "completed works" and just seeing what's new that's been finished recently. Pick one based on the tags and the summary. Read a full story that got finished a few days ago. You might be surprised how much you love it.

#ao3 #fanfic #fanfiction #thoughtsfromthequeen #good omens #tagging you guys because I used you as an example

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naamahdarling · 1 year

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My blorbo OC is ruining my life.

Face of a devil. Looks untrustworthy. Is actually a good man and very truthful.

He sneezes like a kitten.

He can swim like an otter and juggle magnificently.

He can't do math and reads poorly (dyscalculia, dyslexia).

He likes bad reality TV.

He can't cook, burns water.

Scared of outer space.

Can intimidate, chooses to be kind.

Sex pervert, but in an uplifting and affirming way that leaves you feeling spiritually cleansed.

Painfully romantic.

Zero shame. Embarrassed by nothing.

Deeply flawed asshole from 17-25, recovering asshole from 25-35, thoughtful and kind 35+.

Unfortunate tentacle kink.

Wants to live, wants to live, wants to live.

#he's a sweet guy i swear #manipulative and scheming yeah but basically good #oc #gowan threacher #artbynaamah #rambling again #life ruining son of a bitch

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imsofrancey · 5 months

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your Dazai looks so roughed up yet also not. like, more relaxed than canon but high strung too. arrrrrrrrrrrgh, he's just Dazai, and you've captured 'im perfectly <3 just keep doing whatever you do, you magnificent artist you, we all love what you do with the little blorbo

YOUUUUUUUUEUERJJEJE ARE GOING TO MAKE ME CRY. this means the world to me you don't even know... this is the type of ask i reread when i'm feeling a bit sad and it lifts my mood up immediately

#ask #i love you

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nirikeehan · 7 months

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"aftersome adj. astonished to think back on the bizarre sequence of accidents that brought you to where you are today — which makes your long and winding path feel fated from the start, yet so unlikely as to be virtually impossible." for Thaliaaaa perhaps?

Okay, listen. This one is weird, but maybe I'm planning a Dragon Age/Curse of Strahd crossover and sometimes you just wanna smush two blorbos from two different pieces of media together and see what they do. Like introducing cats.

For @dadrunkwriting

WC: 1202

Metrion belongs to the incredible Curse of Strahd: Twice Bitten podcast which, as far as I can tell, has absolutely no fanfic to its name. Until now I guess 🤷‍♀️

---

“Sit, and we can make you presentable, yeah?”

Thalia sits. The cottage is ramshackle and abandoned, one of many in this desolate Nevarran backwoods, the misty, wild place known as Barovia.

“If he knows you by the tattoo,” the man says, “we can take away the tattoo, easy peasy.”

He’s a strange man, the one whose company she has found herself in. Young like her, she thinks, with tan skin and dark hair. He used an affected posh accent she saw through right away, which he has since dropped. What remains — a cockney reminiscent of Free Marcher peasants, is more authentic. He speaks in a nervous mumble almost always. There are times she thinks him selfish — when they fought wolves together on the road he dove for the bushes and shot timidly with a crossbow — but others, like now, she detects a hint of what could be compassion.

“Did you always want to be a magician?” Thalia asks, eying the array of stage makeup he sets out on a rotting table.

He shrugs, not looking at her. “You do what you’re good at, right?”

“I suppose.” Thalia chews her lip. “But what I do and what you do seem a little different. I could never just travel around, doing magic tricks for entertainment.”

Metrion smirks. “Why not? Cause you’re a highborn lady?” The posh accent is back, mocking her own inflection. He reaches out, takes her chin. “Here, look this way, love.”

His fingers are long and thin, hands covered by black gloves that must be needed in this constant damp chill. She frowns at an odd patch of magenta poking out between sleeve and glove on his wrist. Thalia is forced to look away, staring deep into his unsettling yellow eyes.

“It’s not that,” she says as he scrutinizes her complexion. “In my neck of the woods, real mages weren’t allowed to roam free at all.”

“You sayin’ I’m not a real mage?” Metrion shoots back, feigning hurt.

Thalia tries not to roll her eyes. “You’re an actor, that’s clear as day.”

“Can it only be one or the other?” A twitchy smile. He has long incisors; one is inlaid with gold and seems to wink at her in the dim light.

“Are you inviting me to join your act?” Thalia asks playfully.

“Yeah. Definitely. We can be Metrion the Magnificent and Thalia the— the—”

“Thrilling?” she supplies.

“Yeah. I like that.” He frowns at his makeup kit. “Right. You’re paler’n me, so I’m gonna have to do some blending, but I should be able to manage it. Gonna need you to hold real still, though.”

Apprehension threads through Thalia. She remembers the day, many years ago, she had to sit very still for another man, one who had needles and ink instead of sponges and pigment. “—Won’t hurt you,” Metrion adds quickly, as if sensing her discomfort. “I’m a real pro with this stuff, I promise.”

“Yes. Of course.” Thalia shifts in her seat, wringing her hands. Her palms begin to sweat. She thinks of the long series of bizarre events that led her to this moment, in the hands of someone who should, by all accounts, be a charlatan. Yet the touches on her cheekbone and brow are light and practiced, and against her will she relaxes.

“It’s quite a piece of art, this ink,” he murmurs, perhaps to put her further at ease, but Thalia only tenses. He blinks. “Sorry. Meant it as a compliment.”

“I know,” Thalia breathes. “It’s not you.”

“I’m a bit of an amateur tattooist myself, but ah, never did nothing like this.”

With each swipe of his sponge, Thalia imagines the tattoo disappearing from her face, leaving her right eye unmarred for the first time in a decade. “I didn’t exactly have a choice in the matter.”

Metrion’s hand freezes. “Seriously?”

“I mentioned that in my neck of the woods, mages couldn’t just roam free.” She chews her lip. “We were confined to a place called a Circle of Magi. This was the security measure in mine, to make sure we didn’t escape.”

“Shit.” A long silence. “You really ought to come to the Sword Coast, we don’t have nothing like that there.”

Thalia lets out a slow breath. “It’s all right. Things have changed there, somewhat. Mages have more freedom now, though there’s always reminders of the old ways.”

“Yeah. I get that.” Metrion continues dabbing and swiping at her face, brow furrowed with a troubled line between them. “And I know a thing or two, about things done to you against your will.”

“Do you?” Thalia says skeptically. “You don’t… strike me as a man who would stick around for that sort of punishment.” She pauses. “No offense.”

Metrion bows his head over the makeup kit, eyes obscured by the hair falling into his face. Peeking out from the headband he wears are wisps of hair that shine white in the torchlight. He’s awfully young to be going grey, she thinks, but then again, she can’t speak to the life he’s lived, no more so than he can for her.

“’S that a polite way of calling me a coward?” The hurt in his voice, this time, is real.

Thalia tries to protest, but he cuts her off. “No, no, maybe you’re right, a little bit. Or a lot. I dunno. Fuck. I never wanted to be in this place. It’ll wear you down, break you, faster’n you can run. We been told the devil knows our every move, that it’s all a game to him. That we’ll stay alive as long as we keep things interesting. But I dunno if painting your face would make much of a difference in the long run, if he’s got an eye on ya.”

Metrion sounds mournful, apologetic, as if trying to break bad news as gently as he can. Thalia reaches out, with a pang of sympathy, and touches his elbow through his long overcoat. He freezes, dares to meet her gaze only briefly before averting it again.

“He must have a weakness,” Thalia says. “Everyone does.” How can she explain to him that she once stood down a man who would be god? What’s one more vampiric tyrant, in the face of someone like Corypheus?

“Dunno about him,” Metrion mumbles, sighing.

“Still,” Thalia insists, trying to smile, “I appreciate that you’re trying.”

“Yeah. Yeah. ’S all we can do, I guess, in the long run. Lie down and die, or try to live.” He shakes his head as if to clear it and snaps shut his makeup kit. “On that cheery note — you’re all set, love.”

“Thank you,” Thalia says softly. “Have you got a looking glass I can borrow? I’m… curious.”

He gives her a small hand mirror caked with layers of dust and pigment. Thalia squints past it, to the pallid face beyond. Her cheeks look gaunter than she remembers, her eyes a ghostly blue. But the tattoo has vanished as if it never existed, and she turns her face this way and that in wonder.

“Maybe you are a real magician after all,” she whispers, and he looks at her with eyes so raw she worries he might cry.

#thalia trevelyan #metrion the magnificent #dragon age drunk writing circle #curse of strahd: twice bitten #curse of strahd au #i'm 16 episodes in and I would die for Metrion ok (I would die for them all but especially him)#it's criminal how obscure this podcast is i HAD TO TRY WRITING SOMETHING #thedas and the forgotten realms can totally be in the same universe right #it's the baldur's gate connection #the sword coast is the western coast of thedas no one knows about #barovia is in nevarra #no i won't be taking questions at this time

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tinyozlion · 6 months

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Ah dang, it's November already? Incredible. Very inconsiderate of linear time to keep progressing this way.

Anyway, this blog will continue to be slow for a while; I got hit with two devastating back-to-back family losses and then immediately afterwards got sick. So, mental energy reserves at the moment are pretty tapped. Which is very frustrating! because I know exactly what I want to write but I have no juice in the tank to write it. Instead I have been drawing blorbo self care.

On the other hand, I've been doing a lot of informative background reading; Radetzky March by Joseph Roth, Der Rote Kampflieger and a early aviation history stuff, a lot of essays. Plus, I've been catching up with the original U.C. Gundam timeline, which I've been meaning to do since FOREVER. All good things to put in the brain that happen to be tangentially related to GW, for the fixation must feed.

Every time I see new notes and commentary on here I am filled with delight and excitement that people are actually finding my stuff even when I'm not posting. I am also predictably consumed with anxiety about all my less polished entries, frantically editing things behind the scenes knowing full well that this is a futile endeavor for the mistakes have already been immortalized in reblogs... Such is the way.

I hope those who partake had a magnificent Halloween, and that the rest of the year will be kind to you. I know the world is especially violent at present.

For November, have an especially goofy looking Scorpio from the Chartres Cathedral. Look at this idiot. Even his tail looks disappointed.

Yours ever, Wesley, and to a lesser extent, Tinylion

#Housekeeping Post #lifeblogging #unparsable

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hangarsliquides · 10 months

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saw ranking i binged them all again

one > six > two > four > five > three > spiral > jigsaw > 3d

saw 1 at the top. the forerunner. the patient zero, james wan played god and saw was his Light. i had to pay my respects to it and also Adam Stanheight is in it, one of the best characters period. living breathing memorable quote machine. the most cohesive one, one of the better law enforcement plots, the ending... i don't have to talk about it, we all know how iconic it is. i'll just say leigh whannell's scream still sends chills up my spine.

saw 6 had the best spectacle, best traps, great cinematography, also amanda's in it. the last bang for the franchise before the next three movies after it didn't reach anywhere near its caliber, let alone like... saw 5's caliber. the ending is iconic. i'm disappointed that william didn't survive and it would have been interesting for him to be the only main game subject to live ( i'm indirectly declaring saw 3d non-canon). but rodrick heffley did kill a man so atleast i can walk away with this tidbit of information to share to unknowing fools who never saw this franchise. the scene with THE HOFFMANATOR and the voice descrambler was the most fucking stressed i felt during a movie since i saw rob zombie's halloween 2 i was fucking Sick. even though I knew what was going to happen. bravo greutert

saw 2 was a better follow-up than some ppl give it credit for even though it's also the one where the participants get a little stupider. addison's trap was such a perfect example of this, but can i be mad at it? no. because the first time i saw it i guffawed so loudly. im pretty sure my friends are scared of my sick sense of humor. anyways this is the only film where we get to see john kramer in action where he's not in a flashback or immobilized state, and he's a glorious cunt to watch. my deeply self-delusional serial killer blorbo. donnie wahlberg is so fun to watch. he's so angry. all the nerve gas house participants are also pretty fun to watch even though they're all blank slates with one max personality trait i love them. obi tate i will never forget you and your 5 minutes of screentime... love you honey...

saw 4 is funnier than people give it credit for. a lot of this series is, actually. legendary transitions. eric matthews befriends a little rat friend. introduces THE HOFFMANATOR properly. rigg's addiction to going through doors. every bizarre twist in the last fifteen minutes. an entire potential arc from the last movie getting cut short abruptly by strahm shooting one of the worst characters in the franchise to death. i would pick this for a movie night with the boys

saw 5 has also plenty of funny moments. the fatal five's game becomes a really mean comedy with how they simply refuse to work together as a team. even though it was glaringly obvious from the tapes that they were supposed to. mallick's actor overplays his part and its magnificent. more THE HOFFMANATOR action. strahm performs a tracheotomy on himself to escape a trap and he sounds funny for the rest of the film.

saw 3 was carried by bahar soomekh and especially shawnee smith Period. jeff completely drags it down. otherwise it'll be higher. justice for amanda young and allison kerry. i think i would have connected with saw 4 more in a genuine way if kerry was being tested.

spiral, similarly to saw 3, has chris rock dragging down everything. he feels like a pretty stiff actor. luckily he's more bearable to watch than jeff or bobby. that said, having the bousmaniac back at the helm brought back some of the extremely bizarre editing choices that fuel this series' trademark humor. the shaking camera shot that looks like it was made by a rookie in sony vegas pro... chef's kiss mwah.

jigsaw is legitimately bad. weak cast of characters which these movies always have but this cast is weaker than usual. i don't remember anything about halloran and logan except corrupt cop and ex military jiggy apprentice respectively. i dont remember what kind of personality eleanor has. i don't tgink i was paying attention to this half the time except for the barn game which also wasn't super good

saw 3d... the opening trap (misogynistic implications aside), the horsepower trap and THE HOFFMANATOR were the only Really good moments. the new gibson guy is one of the best actors which i mean that he's one of the worst actors. bizarre lines, even more bizarre delivery. the bobby plotline is the worst main game bar none and the only one in the series i would genuinely call torture porn. i can take away some element of humor from jeff being slow ass motherfucker but not this. the traps aren't intriguing enough. the trap involving a woman having to not make a peep at all is so Subtle. and joyce did NOT deserve that. i still don't know how to feel about gordon being an accomplice... i don't know how to make it make sense for his character and his development...

#saw 2004 #saw franchise #saw movies

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cosmic-navel-gazin · 9 months

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COSMIC!!! BLORBO BINGO- the thing dog 💕 -🍮

Dog-Thing aka MY BABY🐺🐾🦴👾

The Free Space is for all the delicious dog treats out there, they deserve them^^

(I love them but realistically I would have to end up plotting their demise and the only reason the *puts them in the wood chipper*-box isn't filled in, is because I think it would just make matters worse with me now having to deal with a billion tinny lil Things, so I opted for filling in the "plotting thier demise"-box. Pretty privilege extends to all of Dog-Thing's many forms of course. They're complex and well-written in Peter Watts retelling of the film but from Thing's pov called The Things)

I'm gonna try and restrict my love for Thing to just Dog-Thing in particular:

Love is stored in Dog-Thing's different ever changing designs, with multiple heads, deformed limbs, crab legs, muscular arms and tendrils! I just love the first on-screen transformation. The way Dog-Thing's head splits open and the skull falls off and its tongue starts dancing in the air *muah!* I love you seamless mixture of practical effects and puppetry and stop-motion and arghhhhh...

Speaking of many forms, I love that we never get to see Dog-Thing/Thing-in-general's original form! It's scarier that you don't know! It let's your mind conjure all sorts of fucked up images that are way scarier than anything they could have designed it's the best and I applaud the films restraint in that way!

I love that Dog-Thing spend 1h-1:30h alone with Clark and he didn't get assimilated, what's that about?!?!!? What does it mean and what does it say about Dog-Thing? I'm not sure you could read a lot into it I feel, but I do know one thing, and that is that Clark is the best dog handler there is!

I LOVE how Dog-Thing subverts the famous "dogs can sense evil" trope in horror movies! If this was any other film, you would have all the humans be unsuspecting while the huskies would be freaking out about Dog-Thing the second they set eyes on it BUT NO! When Dog-Thing enters the kennel all the other dogs are chill. Only when Dog-Thing starts changing and lifting its perfect disguise do they freak out. I love it I love it it's such a good way to show how perfect the imitation really is early on in the film without having to state it. All the dogs in the kennel are chilling and barely react to Dog-Thing's arrival, I love this detail so much:

(they're all just laying around!)

Speaking of kennel, I love seeing blind reactions to The Thing. And one of my favourite parts is watch people's shifting opinion on Dog-Thing. Movie begins with some lads on a helicopter shooting at a dog and almost always, everyone watching is pissed off they're shooting at it and they're yelling at the screen for the guy to stop! Then enter Jed the Wolf-Dog and his magnificent performance: the calculating stare, the composed demeanor, the calm and collected steps, and some people start thinking something's weird about the dog but most are still very loving towards Dog-Thing. Then comes kennel scene, where all the "asshole stop shooting at the dog" shouting suddenly turns into complete shock and horror, going "OH MY GOD OH MY GOD SHOOT IT FUCKING SHOOT IT RIGHT NOW" I love it. And you just know that this was the moment when, if you were a parent in the summer of '82 and were indecisive about which alien movie you wanted to take your kids to watch, this scene is where your mind is made up. I'm just imagining all the parents rushing out the doors to take their kids to watch E.T. during dog kennel scene lmao

LOOK AT JED/DOG-THING'S ACTING I LOVE THEM:

I love this quick moment. The lads are all watching the Thing-"corpse" Copper and MacReady brought from the Norwegian cam, and the camera suddenly cuts to Dog-Thing watching its own autopsy!!!!!!!!!!!! I WONDER ABOUT WHAT DOG-THING'S THINKING ABOUT SEEING ITS OWN CHARRED BODY SO BAAAAAAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JED YOU WERE SUCH A GOOD ACTOR , THIS STILL PIC DOES NOT DO YOU JUSTICE BUT HERE:

A lil treat from Peter Watts' The Things , this one is from the scene above, I love the ending where Thing is terrified and disgusted by the human brain calling it a tumorous lump, it's great:

Autopsy. MacReady and Copper had found part of me at the Norwegian camp: a rearguard offshoot, burned in the wake of my escape. They’d brought it back—charred, twisted, frozen in mid-transformation—and did not seem to know what it was. I was being Palmer then, and Norris, and dog. I gathered around with the other biomass and watched as Copper cut me open and pulled out my insides. I watched as he dislodged something from behind my eyes: an organ of some kind. It was malformed and incomplete, but its essentials were clear enough. It looked like a great wrinkled tumor, like cellular competition gone wild—as though the very processes that defined life had somehow turned against it instead. It was obscenely vascularised; it must have consumed oxygen and nutrients far out of proportion to its mass. I could not see how anything like that could even exist, how it could have reached that size without being outcompeted by more efficient morphologies. Nor could I imagine what it did. But then I began to look with new eyes at these offshoots, these biped shapes my own cells had so scrupulously and unthinkingly copied when they reshaped me for this world. Unused to inventory—why catalog body parts that only turn into other things at the slightest provocation?—I really saw, for the first time, that swollen structure atop each body. So much larger than it should be: a bony hemisphere into which a million ganglionic interfaces could fit with room to spare. Every offshoot had one. Each piece of biomass carried one of these huge twisted clots of tissue. I realized something else, too: the eyes, the ears of my dead skin had fed into this thing before Copper pulled it free. A massive bundle of fibers ran along the skin’s longitudinal axis, right up the middle of the endoskeleton, directly into the dark sticky cavity where the growth had rested. That misshapen structure had been wired into the whole skin, like some kind of somatocognitive interface but vastly more massive. It was almost as if . . . No. That was how it worked. That was how these empty skins moved of their own volition, why I’d found no other network to integrate. There it was: not distributed throughout the body but balled up into itself, dark and dense and encysted. I had found the ghost in these machines. I felt sick. I shared my flesh with thinking cancer.

and one more treat where Thing describes its time as a doggo:

I left that place in ruins. It was on the other side of the mountains—the Norwegian camp, it is called here—and I could never have crossed that distance in a biped skin. Fortunately there was another shape to choose from, smaller than the biped but better adapted to the local climate. I hid within it while the rest of me fought off the attack. I fled into the night on four legs, and let the rising flames cover my escape. I did not stop running until I arrived here. I walked among these new offshoots wearing the skin of a quadruped; and because they had not seen me take any other shape, they did not attack.

Dog-Thing and Thing is just an awesome concept with an even more incredible execution what's not to love!!!!!

#getting Dog-Thing for the blorbo bingo was such a nice surprise <3 <3 ty my friend #The Thing 1982 #asks/replies #ask game

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quietbluejay · 25 days

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A Thousand Sons 4

ok fancy party at Ullanor isn't dressing up Magnus a bit below Ahriman's station I guess we can't go by this without a mention of Magnus' "muscled frame" I swear I'm going to twitch any time I read another book and it talks about muscles

never4get Cylinder Ahriman

‘How do I look?’ asked Magnus. ‘You will certainly attract attention,’ said Ahriman, stepping back from his primarch. ‘And why should I not attract attention?’ countered Magnus, throwing out his arms in an operatic gesture. ‘Am I not worthy of it? Fulgrim and his warriors may quest for perfection, but I embody it.’

Ahriman sounds like a parent asking their daughter if she's sure she wants to wear a skirt that short I'm I'm sorry I read this line and can't stop cackling

His horned breastplate was thrusting and magnificent,

every time I think I can take Magnus seriously, I remember the stupid chest horns

his helmet barely able to contain his slicked crimson hair, which was bound in three long scalp-locks.

helmet being pushed off by hair is nnnnot exactly a nice formal look, dude

-Magnus comes off repeatedly as very immature and keeps using "epic clapbacks" that are what a teen fic writer would use in their first fic like i realize that sounds mean to teen fanfic writers but it's their first fic! this man has multiple published novels by this point

kjhsdflsdj Mortarion as the Obviously Evil guy we're supposed to not like so, naturally, I'm going to become a Mortarion fan

His sunken cheeks were those of a consumptive, and the deep-set amber eyes those of a man who has seen horrors without number.

yes I would like to add one (1) garbage man with thousand yard stare to my blorbo collection

-Magnus also continues to be immature and bad at social interactions but in a way that comes off as the author thinking he's cool but...maybe it's on purpose..???

-Ahriman visualizes a metaphor a bit too hard and then swoons only to get caught by some Luna Wolves (oh hi Abaddon cameo!) (wait how many times has Ahriman fainted so far in this book already?) -Magnus sulks in his room (it literally describes him as sulking), thus not beating the immaturity accusations -I am tormented by McNeill's cursed and tortured metaphors

For six months, the Thousand Sons fleet suckled at the planet’s forges and materiel silos like newborns eager for the teat.

-Magnus refers to Leman as "my lupine brother" and at this point I am deeply surprised we haven't gotten a reference to Ahriman's sapphire orbs -there's more contemplation of Ahriman's muscles. when will i be free.

undulant ridges of his pectorals.

I'm pretty sure pectoral muscles aren't supposed to undulate. Oh no, Ahriman, watch out, it's the flesh change!!

chapter ends with Magnus jumpscaring a human.

#bluejay reads warhammer #warhammer 40k

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hurremshiv · 4 months

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Me looking at old content for most fandoms: This is interesting! I really like some of this content!

Me looking at old Magnificent Century fan content: Gods help me they have misinterpreted my blorbos

#magnificent century #el sultán #muhteşem yüzyıl

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airlock · 1 year

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6, 11, 27!

(pertinent to this ask meme)

#6 - Who's your favorite lord/protagonist?

I may or may not have recently declared a crusade in his name.

(Claude is up there as well also!)

#11 - A character that deserved better?

speaking of which, Claude would have been a prime candidate here, but at least, Three Hopes finally gave him a route that feels like it's his own and not the church's sloppy... firsts. although that route did bring with it a new candidate for this question (they did so little with shahid,)

anyway, god, how does one even begin to choose? I could nominate like half of every female cast from the Kaga era games for one thing. get to the modern games, and you get countless characters who would've benefitted greatly from not being under pressure from being a viable target for the resident customizable protagonist's gaping S-supporting maw. the ones in the middle of the maelstrom are safe from that sort of sweeping problem, but that's not to say they don't have any characters they inidividually did dirty... (Lyn deserved more story relevance, Elincia deserved more time in the limelight in Radiant Dawn, Eirika deserves more respect from the fandom if that counts, and that's just going through protagonists)

anyway, a solid chunk of Awakening's second generation deserved to be in a better game -- perhaps even their own game -- so I guess that's also a big one

#27 - Any fanfics/fan content you’d recommend? (You can plug your own stuff it’s fine)

sneaky creature you are to ask that, considering how much of your stuff I'll rec in a half heartbeat,

anyway, I'm not nearly as avid of a reader as I should be, for being a writer, but here's some of the finest Fire Emblem fanfic that my terrible brain managed not to wander astray from:

Princess of Dawn and its sequels by @wyvern-dork are the ultimate gesture of dedication to a blorbo that I've ever had the privilege of witnessing, let's see, around 80 chapters of so far. y'know, out of the 193 total that are presently up. to describe it only as a novelization of the Akaneia Saga, starring Minerva and featuring Minerva/Palla, would be selling it short. I think the more accurate thing to call it, rather, is the Minerva bible.

not looking for a work that will beautifully gobble up your entire life like that, though? first off all, why aren't you? but second of all, you can still get your Minerva/Palla from the same tap in shorter form: in Blades of Champions, where the two of them are some of the tryhardingest fencers in the whole modern alternate universe

and to complete the hat-trick on recs for this particular friend's works, there's Fingers Through the Sand. in this fic, Luthier dies at war and Delthea's journey to completely mishandle her grief eventually takes her across the sea and to befriend another magical powerhouse with a heart full of grief -- Linde. it will hurt you perfectly while dazzling you with stuff about magic

but lest you think I'm letting you off without another Akaneia rec with lots of magic in it -- as if; here's simplicity by name, the delightful gift I was given for nagamas 2021. it's Merric/Arlen, albeit with some flexibility as to how romantic you read their interactions here exactly, also they're both magnificently trans of gender in there

and I'm not done with the magic yet, or with the ones I've managed to prompt out onto existance. after all, @dornishsphinx‘s May You Arrive at Fertile Phthia dotted that year's FE Rarepair Exchange for me with some of the most evocative (and, at least once, haunting) descriptions of magic I've ever seen. besides that, it also has an intriguing Erk/Nino story largely set after Binding Blade, ie, well after they've both disappeared. it is deliciously detailed, and even has a bunch of Homeric references if that happens to be something you're interested in

while we're at Elibe, @royaltyjunk's the pain in my heart cannot be shared (i really miss you) deserves a mention at the very least because Lyn opening a text convo with Hector with "order bitch" remains one of the most beautifully in-character things I've ever seen for her and it's the first line of the piece- besides that, it's also a modern AU story taking place in our here world, but one might say that it's still about how much Lyn misses the plains.

anyway, let's cap this off with a hat-trick of @queenlua recs, notwithstanding that this tag there is entirely redundant with the other notifications she's about to be getting for this post- anyway, the first one of them is Silent World, a three-chapterer in which Naesala attempts to ruin Micaiah and Sothe's relationship for shits and giggles. it's not quite SFW and it does in fact feature Micaiah/Sothe, but if you're fine with both of those things, then you may join in me suddenly finding Sothe a much more interesting character than you may have originally figured (plus, that Micaiah and Naesala are great characters should require no convincing, but they're still in peak form here, so, that's just Oops! All Interesting)

and here's another three-chapterer while I'm at it -- Where the River Meets the Sea. it's a Claude/Hilda story that doesn't skirt around the dodgy history between Hilda and Almyra -- the opposite, in fact, as that's one of the central themes. the other being that these two are both extremely nonconfrontational people and, sometimes, that's not a good thing. anyway, Lorenz writes a strongly worded letter in this, so, that's the real #1 reason why you should go read it right now

and I'm not done asking you to enjoy Lorenz content either; for that matter, neither am I done with the modern AUs. because summer is miles and miles away is the white whale that I will always be kindly, playfully, yet persistently prodding the author about picking back up someday. it's a Claude/Lorenz story where all the Garreg Mach people are Harvard graduates, Claude is the tech startup bro he was always meant to be, Lorenz hasn't matured quite as fast as he did in canon without a war to light a fire in his ass, and Hilda is great

plus, there's always my own work to recommend, but I take in pride in all the stuff I got to make these days, so, it's hard to pick and choose just a handful. you could always check out my ao3 page and read every last one of them. but to select a few regardless: The Winter Bird is my love letter to all of the Dawn Brigade's obscure underappreciated blorbos; Forests and People features Jamke, Edain, Dew, and probably some of the funniest lines I've ever managed to get into a piece; Building Trust, slightly longer-form than my usual fare, is an ongoing effort to make Catria/Clair happen -- you know, on my part, on their parts, and on Minerva and Palla's parts, with the time they have to spare while they're not flirting with each other -- and if you're in luck I might actually finish the fourth and final chapter this year; and then there's my most recent piece, MozghuzCon, where I drastically exceed my own expectations vis-a-vis story length for a spot of modern AU Bernadetta/Marianne where they're both very transgender, very neurodivergent, and very nerdy.

#ask meme answers #Fire Emblem is tagged in this post #queenlua #whops; not me having to sleep on this post to finish writing all these fic recs #I couldn't spare a word less for any of 'em though. READ 'EM.

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